The Downside with Gianmarco Soresi - #182 The Goo of It All with Gianmarco & Russell (Patreon Exclusive Excerpt)

Episode Date: January 18, 2024

In the excerpt of this Patreon exclusive episode, Gianmarco and Russell share the downsides of Jo Koy hosting the Golden Globes, and an audience member having a seizure at Gianmarco's show.  Join the Patreon to watch the rest of the episode where Russell recounts his dad trying to resuscitate a man at a baseball game (and whether his parents should have told him he ultimately didn't make it), Gianmarco's failed attempt to get onto a p0rn set in Tampa, and we answer some patron questions and respond to your This Has Gotta Stops.  Join the Patreon for only $5 a month to watch and listen to the full episode! Plus, get early access to episodes and exclusive bonus content like this. Watch the episode clip HERE! Follow The Downside with Gianmarco Soresi on Instagram Get tickets to our live podcast recording in NYC on March 4 here: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/744000544657?aff=oddtdtcreator OR come to our first live podcast recording in LA on March 14! https://www.ticketweb.com/event/the-downside-with-gianmarco-soresi-hollywood-improv-the-lab-tickets/13295123 Follow Gianmarco Soresi on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok, Facebook, & YouTube Subscribe to Gianmarco Soresi's email & texting lists Check out Gianmarco Soresi's bi-monthly show in NYC Get tickets to see Gianmarco Soresi in a city near you Watch Gianmarco Soresi's special "Shelf Life" on Amazon Follow Russell Daniels on Twitter & Instagram E-mail the show at [e-mail] Produced by Paige Asachika & Gianmarco Soresi Video edited by Dave Columbo Special Thanks Tovah Silbermann Original music by Douglas Goodhart Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This episode is brought to you by A Real Pain. From Searchlight Pictures comes one of the buzziest films at Sundance Film Festival, A Real Pain. Written, directed, and starring Oscar nominee Jesse Eisenberg alongside Emmy Award winner Kieran Culkin. Witness a hilarious and moving story about two mismatched cousins as they tour through Poland to honor their beloved grandmother. The adventure takes a turn when the pair's old tensions resurface against the backdrop of their family history see a real pain only in theaters november 15th welcome to a patreon exclusive of the downside uh uh we're a little bit late reviewing this but not that late we're recording these closer to release it can be topical i just forced russell to watch joe coy's opening monologue at the golden globes what's your uh review well

you know it's the first time i've ever watched joe coy at all i knew the name uh-huh i recognize the name but i would you wouldn't i wouldn't be able to pick him out of the lineup just because he's asian or any other reason no no i didn't know anything about him only i i wouldn't be able to pick him out of the lineup. Just because he's Asian or any other reason? No, I didn't know anything about him. I didn't know anything about him. I think it was one of those comics that, you know, you see that they have Netflix specials. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're like, I haven't seen any clips of this.

I haven't heard of them. And you're like, oh, he's sold at Madison Square Garden six times. How do I not know? It just shows it's the fractured nature of the world. So this is my first time watching him. as it was many people watching that last i gotta say i don't know i don't know if i'm seeking out anything else it is so fucking bad it's really it's one of the worst things i've ever seen it's so bad that it makes me mad like I think I think there's the same way where like originally look I just don't have any sway but I was like oh I'm not gonna speak shit about

Matt Rife publicly but then he becomes like the face of my literal art form he becomes the person everyone asks about and so it's like I think stand-up comics really kind of went after him after the show because there's a degree of like you made our profession look like we suck you look like stand-up sucks and when people go i hate stand-up comedy how can you blame them based on that yeah and he does this is a guy who performs all the time yeah and he hits like every uh no no every like basic don't do this on stage it's not gonna help he he comes out first he tries to be like super like this was my dream your dream was the golden stop with this stop with this this was not

everyone's dream yeah it's a nightmare job to have to to tell those jokes in that weird room with weird room most famous people in the world celebrities are weird but people have done it people have done it i think you have to strike this real balance of like are you gonna go there and be an asshole everyone's like having their night this isn't just them getting their awards they get to see their friends they're all on movie sets all day they're working yeah they're probably obsessive workers this is their night to get drunk and have fun yeah uh so you have to strike this balance of like kind of mean enough to be funny yeah but don't ruin anyone's night like tina fey and emma poehler did a pretty good job brilliant of of doing that i i do the very first year where kid you wasted i did

love the like the kind of thing of like not towing the line fully and just kind of being mean to these people yes because i do think there is a fun like almost white house correspondence nature of like totally the only time this kind of person could make fun of these people, and they're all trapped there, and they have to have it. And they are kind of ruling the world a little bit in a certain way.

And so it is fun to see someone be like, hey, you have to sit here, and we're all gonna laugh about you, and you're like things, and you're all like for years propped up, like harvey you know weinstein and blah blah so so i i can get on board with that but this whatever there was not even an attempt at like this wasn't this wasn't he wasn't being mean it was nothing like no he wasn't mean and he was he was so desperate i think this is like first of all this is a perfect example like joe coy, I don't know a lot about Joe Coy.

I've seen enough specials. But I imagine, based on what I see of the stand-up career, it's like he has a huge following. He sells at big arenas. And it shows like this are an opportunity to really enter just a whole different section of Hollywood to, like, have a movie career. I mean, all the directors are there. And so this is a big deal. This is him going in front of an audience that isn't all just stand-up fans and maybe he becomes a name do you think he has meetings lining

up oh i'm sure this is considered a disaster yeah so he goes up there and he like you can tell he wants to be liked you can so badly yeah you can feel it and he does so much like i can't believe robert de niro's there it's like dude act like you belong here yeah and he the he blames the writers like within three minutes so many times and he starts doing like a thing where he goes like the ones you laughed at that was me and i think he's probably trying to be like jokey like yeah that one was me but it comes off just like like pathetic no one's laughing fully at any of them no one's laughing at any of it there's there's there's some sympathy laughs you know there's some sympathy things but then there's like full bomb

moments too full bomb mike lawrence uh who's he's a big roaster uh he like was the champion of roasters is like a comedic writer and and stand-up comedian he said i just saw now he was like he didn't establish like who he was yeah like ricky Ricky Gervais, you get the benefit of being famous. Ricky Gervais, they know who he is. He's there and he's got his beer. But if you don't, you got to set up your character. Who you are, what your thing is. And for him, his character is just like, I can't believe I'm here.

A mean little jab. And no one really knows who he is. If you are, no one knows who I am. Establish that with a good joke and then move on. And then the classic awful stand-up thing of like, even when they were laughing and then being like, what? Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba.

Like acting like that they were offended and they weren't. No, like they weren't offended. Maybe they didn't laugh as hard, but they did get a reaction. And then you're consistently going back and being like, being like, what? No, that ain't. And like defensively.

And you don't need it. It's not like, but you're just doing that to then say the punchline again or something? instantly going back and being like being like what no that and like like defensively and you don't need it it's not like but you're just doing that to then say the punchline again or something yeah it's like it's like it's almost as if like not not appreciating the medium of hosting which i think is more tightly written where he would have a joke it would sometimes do fine yeah listen that audience was not like the worst thought they were given it oh they were very generous for how bad it was but he would say a punchline at first he'd say he wouldn't really hit it i feel like he kind of like what's on i swallow it and then he would like add tags that were not rid of just like yeah you know it's a it's it's it's meryl streep and so he adds this like extra repeating dead air and

it just it peters out every time and then he would like shy away from the punchline. Part of doing jokes is you got to tell the joke. Yeah. You can't tell, set a punchline and then like, well, let me try to make it more naturalistic. Right. Because it's not. This is not natural. No. And then the worst is mine is just the laughing.

There's a thing of when you're bombing, you're like, well, let me make up for the laughs by providing them myself. Yeah. And it never works. And I know the impulse. I know it. I know the impulse. If you watch our live show that we're recording with Emily Wilson today, you will see us doing the same thing. We do it.

We all do it to a degree. But what's amazing is this guy is like, he's been a stand-up comedian for forever, and he just shits the bed. Also, okay. He says I only had 10 days to prepare for this. It's a long time. Fuck off, dude. It's a long time. If you gave me 10 days, I would, A, I'd spend all my money. And resources.

Resources. And if I didn't get them, I'd spend, he's got more money than me. Resources. Resources. And if I didn't get them, I'd spend, he's got more money than me. You would get, if you get five, six, seven, like, friend slash writer, like, comedy writers to help you, 10 minutes material? Come on now. And what's amazing, he had this Taylor Swift joke later in the night where all he said

was like, unlike the NFL, we're not going to rely on as many cutaways to Taylor Swift. And then a cutaway to Taylor Swift swift and then it cut to taylor swift and she looked kind of like displeased or just not interested and all our fans like i can't believe he would be so rude to her like like her fans are so ready to flip out yeah that part of it's like a if you're gonna make a taylor swift joke they're gonna take the wrong way anyway so you might as well fucking go for the goddamn bullet yeah b just make sure it's good yeah and it wasn't a terrible joke it wasn't even like towards sales which was about the nfl but he delivered it so poorly yeah you're like there's something funnier there's gotta be something funnier in there of like instead of cutaways tails if we're gonna do cutaways to

blah blah like and i don't know do something different and creative that you can have a call back to later on um there's nothing more pathetic than than i'm in robert de niro's here at one point he said he said you're talking to me and i'm like shut the fuck up that is the first thought if my dad met robert de niro he'd say you're talking to me no it's not for a monologue host to say yeah it's like i i was with my i was with my opener this weekend liam and liam yeah and i i've sometimes we we spend outside the show, and we went to a cigar bar, and two people within the span of 10 minutes goes, hey, sorry to bother you. How tall are you? And you're like, this is the first thought, and it sucks.

Yeah. This guy, everyone. That's not tall. Everyone, they ask him. And then this guy goes, hey, I bet I know his favorite four-letter word, D-U-C-K. And we all have to play along. Duck. duck sorry i should have said it for you um it's but it's my point of just like a comedian should understand the concept of what a first thought is meryl streep wins all the time yeah that's that's the oldest fucking like oh man it was it was so bad and then jim gaffigan went up there and he introduced this

award and all i said is like i never thought i'd be here you know i i never thought i'd be part of a hollywood award show because you know i was i was born in indianapolis i'm not a pedophile and he just it's just like that's it it's just a good joke yeah man it sucked how did he get picked to you about how long how low on the list do you think he was before they asked him i don't i always wonder if it was 10 days ago they probably were asking other people for a while sure i mean i don't i don't know i'm sure there's i'm sure people don't get that much notice and i'm sure these agents and managers are fighting. I wonder if Mulaney's asked. I wonder if... I'm sure Ricky has asked. By the way, Ricky won Best Stand-Up

Special. Just a nightmare. I... If you start going to award shows... You'd start going before me, probably. You'd have to. Who knows? Who knows who will be at the Globes? who knows who will be at the races on who knows

who will hit the globes first you'll be at the tonys before me um are you gonna be like if you get an award are you gonna make one joke are you gonna be do you see will ferrell and yeah oh yeah what a joy yeah i love them they should host they should of course they always do but they must they must they must be asked and they probably are like no we will do one bit and everyone will love it and everyone will love it and they won't love it as much

if we have to do the whole show like this you know but what were you gonna let me say real quick for our patrons we hit an exciting milestone

yes we're now over a thousand dollars a month and that's because of of you guys so we're now over a thousand dollars a month uh and that's because of of you guys um so we're very grateful we're now only operating at a loss of three million dollars per year yeah um but i appreciate you guys we are very thankful we are that you guys come up to me after shows uh i always say i say rob i'm gonna get rus Russell down here and I know I'm lying we are doing a live show

in in Hollywood LA and that's very exciting we gotta figure out Holly weird Holly weird right

we gotta we're gonna get the most famous pedophile in the world as a guest so keep telling your friends we are we're doing this once a month

we're doing the live episodes here once a month and I'm sure eventually we'll get two patrons. I'm just trying to get Russell every day. Every day. Just become a full-on radio show. Yeah. So stay joined.

Tell your friends. Things are going well. So I figured I should share what happened this weekend. Yeah. I was in Tampa, Sidesplitters Comedy Club. Yeah. I did a weekend there a long time ago. Every time you visit Florida, you see, it's not all of Florida that's crazy,

but you see, oh, there's some crazy people in Florida. I remember last time I was there, and I made a clip out of it that didn't do well, but someone threw up. Oh, yes. And I just got this impression. So in my mind, I'm like, Tampa's a little zany. And so I get down there. Thursday is my first show. Sold well enough.

And I'm up there about about 20 25 minutes in i talked to these uh three women in the front row and they they say they're icu nurses and we do a little crowd work one minute later i have the recording one minute later i just noticed from the stage something something seems off just like two like two people are standing and they're not like going to the bathroom or anything so i look over and eventually i see that someone's lying on the ground i assume just based on my last experience i was like oh it's probably just someone drunk passed out or whatever and i go here we here we go weekend in tampa gonna be chaos and and then very quickly like it's clear that they can't seem to wake him up and i i go you know i kind of i'm the one who makes the move that makes the whole room go oh something's wrong because i was in the i literally had started like a long chunk i said two lines

and then i'm like oh is is everything okay and it's just you feel the wave of the whole audience realizing like something's wrong something's happening something's wrong so these three icu nurses uh go right over and he's probably my age probably in his 30s um doesn't seem like anyone is there with him like no one's like oh my god like yeah it just feels like strangers and uh these these these nurses try to wake him up and like there is i would say a solid minute where it does not seem like this guy is waking up and i'm on stage there's such a weird feeling of like i'm just on stage holding a mic yeah and i'm going like oh my god did this guy is he dead yeah and there's their first there's like 30 seconds of oh he's drunk he'll get up we'll finish the show and then there was a feeling of like something's oh we're gonna call an ambulance

and um i'm just standing there it's so weird because it's like you're just elevated and you're like, do I go sit down? Do I just stay here? Can I tell you, me? Yeah. Once I see those ICU nurses, I think I truthfully would be like, all right, well, we're going to let everyone deal with this and we'll be back as soon as possible. And I would have to leave. Sure. Like I would be so uncomfortable with watching it all

or being a part of it. If you were on the mic the whole time, you were just like, someone turn the mic off, please. He took drugs, right? He took drugs. Nothing that could happen to me, right? He took weird drugs.

I would just be like, you know, freaking out, you know? And so, I think I was just, I was just shocked. I was just like, in my mind, I was like, you know, and so i i think i was just i was just shocked i was just like in my mind i was like you know i i hope he's okay there's nothing i could do at this point i'm just standing there i hope he's okay but in my mind i was just like man i don't even know what what's gonna happen right now and um eventually someone called 9-1-1 they got him awake and it was like it was a long time it felt like a long time and they kept saying to him like don't go back to

sleep don't go back to sleep and he was like i'm sorry and then the whole audience had even drunk like what like no i i don't think so i think maybe he had a drink yeah but but they like do you think it's a seizure and he was like kind of but he was pretty loopy they asked him what year it was and he said at some point i think he said 2024 and then there's like no it's 2023 and then she was like oh no right right it's 2024 um and and he he kept going like i'm i'm sorry and the whole audience like very sweetly the whole audience became sweet and they're like it's okay you don't have to say you're sorry and um i think at some point someone in the audience was like is there a manager and i was like oh we need a manager and i was like oh i have this amplification device in my hand so i go uh manager please yeah i felt like

i'm helping i'm helping yeah um emt came i they said is there a is there a rolly chair anyone have a rolly chair they didn't have a gurney a gurney and i and i remembered in the green room which was essentially just a little office there was a rolly chair yeah and and so i go like oh cool i'll i'll i got it yeah and i i ran into the green room and this is there was a moment again he was awake at this point yeah there was a moment i'm i'm taking the the wheelie chair through the kitchen just swinging it around elevating it where one of the like uh security people almost tried to like not not try to take it off my hands like i'll do it for you no worries yeah and there's a feeling of like no i got it yeah i got it let me let me let me be let me be

good yeah and uh i I brought it in. At this point, they were able to get him up. They had opened his shirt. They put him in. It was very strange to watch someone wheel out, like a hospital people wheel someone out in a- In a wheelchair. In an office chair.

Yeah. And he left, and suddenly this woman towards the front like started getting really teary and i was like oh are you okay and she said i get seizures sometimes too and i always say i'm sorry and like there's no reason to be sorry and i was like okay we don't we don't need any more we don't need any more oh my god uh uh and then and then it was the manager came over, like, a look like, should we cancel the show? And I was like, no, it's okay. And then I went back up, did some jokes. First, you know, lots of thanks to the nurses.

Yeah. And then made a joke, if I hadn't said they were nurses earlier, that they would have pretended they were plumbers just to have the night off yeah and then and then uh and then i had some joke about someone having a medical emergency and i i went back into the show oh good how much more time did you have to do an hour i mean i didn't have to but you know yeah it felt cool in the sense of like first the nurses said based on their experience that he would be okay. Yeah. Just based on how he was responding. Yeah.

Though of course there's that weird feeling of like. He knows where he is and he's the year. But also like the hospital's not going to come back and be like hey just so you guys know for your peace of mind. That stranger died. Yeah. Yeah. Hospital representative comes at the end of your show. Just so everyone knows before they leave. An uh he did die yeah well there's a scene in hacks i guess that my mom

was telling me about where at a taping someone has a medical emergency and it's like she's taping her comeback special yeah and uh they they roll they roll them out and the producer comes back goes he's alive everything's okay and the other producer's like oh thank god he's alive and he's like no you idiot he's fucking dead you think i'm gonna ruin this taping for the show and you do have that feeling of it's like to the people in that room that guy is no longer a part of their lives it's just very weird you go i hope he's okay yeah but no one in the room is gonna make sure of it yeah i think i told you I saw someone die at a football game when I was a kid. He had an older man.

He had a heart attack watching his grandson's championship football game. He threw up and had a heart attack. And my dad did CPR and stuff on him. How old were you? Probably like 10, 11. You were playing or just in the stands in the stands oh my god so you're sitting uh-huh your dad does your dad he's not a doctor no but he like he he was originally like a phys ed teacher so he did all and he was a coach

for many years so he had all the cpr and and all that training so uh was he close like like your dad saw it and was like i got it. We were right in front of us. Wow. So, um, and then I was like, I remember later on being like, what happened to that guy? And they're like, oh, he died. And I was like, I'm thinking like later, like my parents could have lied. Cause I was never, I didn't know that man and I was never going to see him again. And it was traumatic.

It's like, I, you know, when you're like, I remember, I remember him. What did your dad do? CPR? I remember, um, i don't remember seeing that part i remember like they they must have moved me like once that kind of thing happened sure because but i do remember seeing the guy like stand up throw up like and then fall over and then like that that's vivid in my memory um and then i think that some my mom must have like moved me up the stairs or something because i don't remember the after that part um but uh but yeah i do think it's funny that i asked later that night or the next day and they were like he he died do you think they should have

told you no i'm glad they did uh you know i think it's weird to lie because like what if i found out later that he you know what i mean like so i my dad was definitely like he would lean towards lying to make me feel better and i do think in the overall trajectory as i came to be i could have dealt with trauma like i could have microdosed trauma along the way i think too it's hard with a parent because you're like there's so many times you have to decide to lie or not that i think rule of thumb in general is to not because you're like you're so many times and like it can be fucked up if later on for some reason you find out like oh my parents were lying to me all these weird in all these weird different ways so i understand the kind of rule of thumb just being like i'll just tell them the truth because it's that's why it's probably important like for me truly my first loss was putting my dog down

in like fifth grade and it was like that's the first time i dealt with death in any kind of real way and it was like i'm not saying it's a good but it i had to deal with i mean if i hadn't had that dog it would have just been like until my grandparent died yeah and then i deal with my first death i'd rather have an animal death be the first death yeah to be honest yeah um so so yeah it was i mean thank you he seems so basically later two days later they didn't they had this guy's name because he had at least some check at the bar and the bartender or the manager told me they were able to reach him and he was like oh yeah i had a seizure it's and he seemed like somewhat embarrassed i guess over the phone

yeah but that he was fine great but uh tovo tovo was like between this and the sign language interpreter she's like more weird things keep happening at your shows. And I'm like, no, I think it's just like more people are there. And then it increases the chance for unusual things. Yeah. You got to imagine any of those like arena shows that people do. Something's happening bad at every one of those shows.

And then one day you're that guy at that concert where like eight people are crushed to death. I know. You don't even know. Yeah. And then suddenly you're like, fuck, fuck i gotta pay for eight funerals you're listening to the downside with john marco cerezi