The Downside with Gianmarco Soresi - #189 The Worst Comedy Club in the World

Episode Date: February 20, 2024

Comedians Eagle Witt and Lucas Connolly join to share the downsides of working at a now-closed comedy club in Times Square that we’re calling “McDonald’s” for legal purposes. RIP Kenny Ortega. You can watch full video of this episode HERE! Join the Patreon for ad-free episodes, exclusive content, and MORE. Follow Eagle on Instagram, Twitter, & TikTok See Eagle in a city near you: https://www.eaglewittcomedy.com/ Follow Lucas on Instagram & Twitter Check out Lucas' weekly show, Ambush, in Williamsburg: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/ambush-comedy-at-ebbs-brewing-co-tickets-764291816397 Follow The Downside with Gianmarco Soresi on Instagram Get tickets to our live podcast recording in NYC on March 4 here: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/744000544657?aff=oddtdtcreator OR come to our first live podcast recording in LA on March 14! https://www.ticketweb.com/event/the-downside-with-gianmarco-soresi-hollywood-improv-the-lab-tickets/13295123 Follow Gianmarco Soresi on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok, Facebook, & YouTube Subscribe to Gianmarco Soresi's email & texting lists Check out Gianmarco Soresi's bi-monthly show in NYC Get tickets to see Gianmarco Soresi in a city near you Watch Gianmarco Soresi's special "Shelf Life" on Amazon Follow Russell Daniels on Twitter & Instagram E-mail the show at [e-mail] Produced by Paige Asachika & Gianmarco Soresi Video edited by Dave Columbo Special Thanks Tovah Silbermann Original music by Douglas Goodhart Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Kick off an exciting football season with BetMGM, an official sportsbook partner of the National Football League. Yard after yard, down after down, the sportsbook born in Vegas gives you the chance to take action to the end zone and celebrate every highlight reel play. And as an official sportsbook partner of the NFL, BetMGM is the best place to fuel your football fandom on every game day. With a variety of exciting features, BetMGM offers you plenty of seamless ways to jump straight onto the gridiron and to embrace peak sports action. Ready for another season of gridiron glory? What are you waiting for? Get off the bench, into the huddle, and head for the end zone all season long.

Visit BetMGM.com for terms and conditions. Must be 19 years of age or older. Ontario only. Please gamble responsibly. Gambling problem? For free assistance, call the Conax Ontario helpline at 1-866-531-2600.

BetMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. Right. Welcome to the downside. I hope you didn't shut it off from that long-held note. We're going to keep it in. Here's the deal, guys. We're not sure when we're releasing this, so we're going to make this evergreen.

It's going to be this year. Don't worry. Great. Lucas was like, what? I got tickets to sell. Yeah, I do. Here's the deal, Russell is, I imagine this is

going to come out when it's okay to say Russell booked the understudy He's going to be understudying Josh Gad for the Broadway production You tell Saul

I'm telling everybody. Telling everybody. Josh Gad in, what is it called, Paige? Gutenberg. Gutenberg, because I forgot. Gutenberg the musical.

Very exciting. He's still part of the podcast. He swore to me. He swore to me over drinks. He's not leaving. But we have a couple episodes where he's not here. And I wanted to,

first I wanted to get a co-host I reached out to Lucas I like having people who have done the show before Lucas, you may know him from his live episode That we did We talked all about his rehab And things okay Things are great

That's too bad It could have been a fun episode If you'd realize I'd be like Eagle, don't even bother coming. We're doing a crazy episode today. Oh, my God. The worst part is I'd just be like, I haven't left my house. This is the first time I left my house. Eagle is our guest to a certain extent.

He said, he texted me this. Here's my, this has got to stop. He texted, hey, running a little late, but I took an Uber because I love you. And for a second, my heart went, oh. And he said, what time are you going to get here? Four. For a 3.30 show. That's not love.

That is toxic thinking to think that's love. That's not love at all. I told you, take a helicopter, you love me. 30 minutes late? That's crazy. That's crazy. That's crazy. You better be taking an Uber. What was the other option if you didn't take an Uber?

You'd come tomorrow? Yes. We confirm this. Oh, he's lucky. He's funny. I love an abusive. Someone who's abusive. Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm. And so what we're going to talk about today, we're going to talk about a comedy club. Now, I've talked about this comedy club before. I think there was one clip where I beeped it, then another where I said, ah, fuck it, just leave it in. This was at a time I was kind of working there once in a while. And then I stopped. I love your shoes. Your shoes are hamburger seeds. Thank you. Very cool.

My favorite. So, we're going to talk about it. Yes. We want to go in the depths because it has a deep history like this. And I already know the title of this is going to be called the worst comedy club in the world. Because I think there's something so special about this. I think it, it, it's, this is like the real convergence of like capitalism, uh, and comedy and tourism. And just like the, the worst manifestation of all these things

where the art is so, so low on the totem pole. Yet all these great comedians that you know have passed through these doors. Who are we talking? Hannibal Buress. Yes. Buress. Nate Bargatze. I've heard Pete Holmes used to stop by here.

Bill Burr couldn't get in. That's how popular this club is, and that's a story we'll be talking about later. But you've never been there, right, Paige? No. And it's moved many times. It's changed names. So while we wait for Eagle,

and don't worry, we're going to cut. I'm not going to make you guys sit through this long an intro. So this is a special episode. We're going to talk about the downsides of this particular comedy club. And if it does well, I have this fantasy where this becomes a spinoff. And I get to talk to other comics from this era. Because it's a long swath. Luis Gomez used to book it.

And he's a very popular figure in comedy. And it stretches back. And it's old comics, a very popular figure in comedy, and it stretches back, and it's old comics, young comics, now rich comics, struggling comics, dead comics. A lot of dead comics.

A lot of dead comics. Rest in peace. Rest in peace, Kenny Ortega, man. And Mike DiStefano. Right, right. I didn't know he was a guy. Huge guy.

Really? Really. And he was, did he just die of natural causes? Or did he, was it drugs? I believe he had AIDS. Oh, he had AIDS? Or HIV or something. One of the, yeah.

Really? Yeah. So, but he had it for like 20 years. Sure, sure. And we have Paige here to make sure we don't get too lost in the weeds. We explain things so Paige can understand them. Not, oh, God. Okay, so first we have to come up with two things.

One, this is how low the budget is for the podcast. Paige is our lawyer. I'm serving as legal counsel today. Paige, she's like, I Googled it. She sent me an article that I read the title of that said, say allegedly. Allegedly. But if we don't use the name of the club,

then we don't have to say allegedly. You already did, though. We did? Yeah, you just... Oh, didn't I say I want to call this, I want to call it the worst comedy club in the world, comma, allegedly. No, you said it after.

Oh, allegedly. No. What did I say? You said the name of the club already. Did I? Both of you did, yeah. No, we didn't. Son of a... You already have to ble Oh, allegedly. No. What did I say? You said the name of the club already. Did I? Both of you did, yeah. No, we didn't. Son of a...

You already have to bleep it. No way. Well, that's why Paige is here. I don't even remember saying it. I feel gaslit. I really... I thought I was being really dry. Roll back the tape.

All right. Well, thanks, Dave Colombo, for editing this one heavily. So let's come up with a name. Because we thought we would call it its old name, which we decided was too close. We can't use any acronyms. Is that what that's called? No, it's not the acronyms.

I'm trying to think of comedy. So we talked about when I tried to name a comedy show way back in the day, you'd Google it and everything's been done. I thought I was a literal genius for coming up with brouhaha. Brouhaha is a real word. It's a crazy word that exists in a lexicon. And there's been 28 brouhahas all over the world. But I feel like we can use a name like that.

Like a brouhaha doesn't slip off the tongue. No. I think it should be short. Why don't we just say something that's completely not it, but is the idea of it, like McDonald's. Something that's like we all agree are- Corporate overlord. I see, I see. Yeah, something that's a evil capitalistic thing.

Sure, sure. Okay, McDonald's. We could do McDonald's. I think that that's fun i do think it's fun and so you know you know uh and then i guess we can call the owner ronald ronald is mcdonald's gonna come after us now? I mean, maybe. Come for us, please. That's going to do some good movement. If we can get in trouble with the arches, that's great for our careers. So the thing we can mention now is that you still, let me just say, I used to work at McDonald's a lot. Yes.

And we'll talk about that. We'll go into how we went into it. But let's talk specifically, you still work at McDonald'sdonald's mcdonald's is mine and by the way yes both the the real one mcdonald's and mcdonald's yes yes yeah yeah so so doing this because when i asked you i said oh i should check like are you okay because don't get me wrong. This is a stage. This is people with feelings and who can laugh. And there can be some money in it.

Yes. So why are you doing this? Okay, here's my thought on it. If this goes viral and it's so big that Ronald finds out and I get fired, you'll feel bad enough to help me. Oh, no! I did not know that was a good one. Again,

if it gets that big and it's getting that many numbers, maybe there's some way you can help me if I'm completely now destitute. I will give you all the ad money we get from this episode, which is the equivalent of how much I made my first year working at McDonald's. Zero dollars.

Zero dollars. So stay tuned. Listen, I know this isn't a regular episode. I know some of you are in it for Russell, but I promise there's going to be a lot of good stories. And also real quick, join the Patreon. Patreon.com slash Downside. You get bonus episodes.

My exclusive to the Patreon clean comedy special, The Rats Are In Me. We're so close to getting this merch done. I know I've said it for a while, but ultimately you get to support the show. And Russell and I, we're going to start recording more Patreon-exclusive episodes. That's just the two of us getting into the show. And Russell and I are going to start recording more Patreon-exclusive episodes.

That's just the two of us getting into the weeds. And then, Paige, tell people about the new Instagram page. Oh, yes. Follow us at The Downside Pod

on Instagram. We're posting new clips, old clips, behind-the-scenes stuff, everything else in between. Fun comments. And submit us.

That's the place. Message your This Has Got. Fun comments. And submit us, that's the place, message your This Has Gotta Stops, message any thoughts you have, suggestions for Lucas, what to do once he's fired from McDonald's. If I get fired from McDonald's for this, it's going to help me.

Probably. So that's all I, I keep saying that to myself because I need out, but it feels like I'm going to have to get kicked out. Well, yes. Well, that's the thing. I have...

Originally, I used to go back to McDonald's. It got worse. It moved locations. Got worse. Yes. But I still was like, I'm going to use this as a space to work out new material.

And then for me, my true full dropping off point was a thing stopped running on time b and this was my my final thing was they dropped checks on me now checks is where i started this is it's a stupid system but i guess it has to happen comedy clubs are all about the turnover they want to have new shows they want to start the next show immediately because people have a cover charge. They buy their two drink minimum. And this particular place, they're trying to make money. Get it done.

Roll it over. And there's this general fear, I guess, the comedy clubs have that the patrons are going to just leave without paying. So they feel like they need to do the entire check process during the show. Oh, there's another reason, too. Tell me. The other reason it's it's a there's another reason too tell me the other

reason is that it is a benefit to the waiters there because people are not reading them well enough so then they add on their own 20 on the 20 that's already added onto the gratuity of the thing so basically if you give people a time when there's nothing else happening people will go oh gratuity is added sign yeah so they are all looking to try to make that kind of extra money in that way yes so and it's known as the check spot they normally give it to new comics and i mean the crazy part is they don't pay a lot of clubs don't pay the check spot which is crazy because you're literally on stage witnessing the club make their money i've never thought about it like that but it is gross yeah that you actually think because you're just looking at you go okay so this table right here

is 120 this is another 120 this is another 100 like and then you're on there getting zero zero and it's a tough spot and no one wants to do it. You're doing them a favor, but they're acting like they're doing you a favor. And for the audience, it's terrible, because they're just witnessing how badly they've been ripped off. And so they go, you know what? Well, maybe it was worth it.

And then they look up at you, the worst comic on the lineup, and they go, what? This is what I paid for? So they're mad at you? Yes. And it really sucks. And a generous host will let

the checks drop and then bring you up uh but eventually you get tired one day and you just bring them up and you say fuck them let them quit yeah and uh and they also they don't drop it like like gradually there's no like wave some clubs are good about it. They'll do it gradually, but not great clubs. McDonald's? McDonald's was the most brutal of all the ones. They'll go in the front row and block half the audience, and it's a hellscape.

So we're about to be joined when we jump after the music. We're going to be joined with Eagle Wit. We're both of a certain generation of this club. Yes, we're all the same. But it stretches a little, so we're going to get into the weeds. Again, join the Patreon, patreon.com

slash downside, and tell us if you dig this episode because we'll be making more, and this is The Downside. One, two, three! Downside! You're listening to The Downside. The Downside Downside You're listening to The Downside The Downside With Gianmarco Ceresi

We're here joined Finally By Eagle Witt Hello, how are you doing Eagle? I'm good, how are you? We have to say congrats Yeah, congratulations On the engagement

Okay, okay, yay What was that look? Confusion, I mean it was What else happened to you? to say congrats on the engagement. Okay, yay. What was that look? Confusion. I mean, it was... What else happened to you? I didn't know what you guys were going to congratulate me on. There's another thing, too,

but I didn't know if you guys knew that. I was like, I don't know what they're congratulating me on. What's the other thing? I don't know. It depends when this comes out.

I might not be able to say. It's going to come out in a bit. What's a bit? Could be a month and a half, two months. Oh, I got... Fuck, yeah. It's a huge engagement. Oh, I got... Fuck, yeah. I got an engagement.

Hell, that's huge. Thanks, man. That's funny. That must be tough to pretend the engagement matters more to you. Did I do a good job just now? No. I feel like I was trying. Did I do a good job?

Yeah. Let's bring it back. Are you ready? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah yeah yeah yeah congrats I do I feel like it's such a good lead

and now that you're engaged to tell one story so just so you know we had we recorded a little intro before you got here for legal purposes we're calling it

McDonald's okay and the owner is Ronald that sounds right that sounds right it felt right by McDonald's that that's reasonable.

Exactly. Exactly. Legal purposes, we're going to call it another business that we could get sued by. Yeah, but if they sue us, that's awesome. That'd only be good for us. Yeah. So I remember once, because when I started working at McDonald's, you were kind of done with McDonald's. But I remember you came by once and we were

waiting outside and you're engaged now. It's going to go great. I'm sure it will have made it by the time this comes out. But I think three women passed Eagle. And Eagle I think got into each of their DMs. And I mean, I've never seen game like this.

These are the circles I run and it's not people with game. But every person that went by you had a hit on them successfully and this is the one i remember the most there's this woman walked by and they're going to take like a shit the worst shit of their lives like the worst the worst shit of their lives grossest bath mcdonald's bathroom you've ever been to i used to i used to because I was so scared about wearing shorts on stage. I would change from shorts into pants in that bathroom and I would do it like putting my shoes and taking the pants. I've done that in that

bathroom. And you keep your feet on the shoe because it's covered in every liquid. All the liquids. And this woman came out and you were like, hey, can I get your Instagram? And she said, oh, thank you. My man's in there.

And you said, can you do me a favor? And I was like embarrassed on his behalf. He's like, can you do me a favor? Tell your man he's the luckiest man in the world. And she went, all right, come to your Instagram. And I was like, no! He is in the room. He is in the room! He is in the room!

It shocked me, man. It was hilarious. That's an amazing move. Because if they aren't actually, if their man isn't in the other room. I would have to know a woman for five years, and then at an office party, we're in line,

and I'd touch her elbow maybe yeah hi that's so have you ever a guy ever punched you well well the amazing thing is like i don't remember saying that but that sounds like me yeah yeah and it's like the thing is it's a punch it's a it's a punch proof move because when you come you're like hey buddy i'm complimenting you you did a great job you have game i don't have game you're hot you got this girl good job i'm a loser she doesn't want me you know i mean like it's like a it's like a weird compliment to him if he takes it the wrong way and then if he goes too crazy it makes her look at him sideways where he's like but i'm not am, am I not making you the luckiest man in the world? I don't understand.

It's like a whole mind fuck of like, how mad could you get? You can't even express your anger. We should just turn this into like a pickup advice podcast. That was really popular for a while. Like, guys, I feel like you could do that. I could, but it's like, I don't know, people wouldn't like it. No, they would love you. You would just have a really bunch of red pill-y kind of.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Poor, poor kids are like, Eagles would love you. You would just have a really bunch of red pill-y kind of... Yeah, yeah, yeah. Poor, poor kids are like, Eagles told me to... You know what the problem is? People aren't going to do it the way you give them advice to do it. Of course not. You know what I mean?

You're like, do it like this, and then they do it in this terrible way, and then everybody's like, I learned from Eagle, and it's like, that's not what I said to do. I didn't say to do that. Yeah, but I think with all that stuff, it's like a big part of the equation is looks absolutely and like you have a

you're trying to fuck and i'm with it you have like long hair you have a a feminine in like a in a not scary like energy what you mean and i think there's something about you that it's like okay somebody told me once i find this to be very true you could chime in if it's not true but she has a boyfriend you leave her alone god damn are you gonna tell her tell her to tell him he's the lucky he is the lucky he is i agree instagram now um i was gonna say somebody told me that uh that girls either like guys that are like super masculine or super feminine but in between is what girls go ah it's not all that but like they like essentially like feminine presenting men or very masculine presenting men yeah more

than the in-betweens sure and i kind, if you think about like who like everybody's like man crush Monday is, it usually is a guy that's either like super pretty or super rugged. Yeah. Yeah. Hmm. What would you say? Which side of the spectrum are you on Lucas? Autistic.

That's hot. That's hot. That's hot. That's hot. So, so, uh, as I said,

there's a very special episode of, of the downside because I do wantside, because I do want to have you on a regular episode as well, but we want to talk about, allegedly, the worst comedy club in the entire world. So, I figure we should start by saying how we started there. I'll go first, because I was dating a comic. Ooh, what comic were you dating? What? we started there. I'll go first because I was dating a comic. What comic were you dating? What? I was trying to think of another McDonald's character. The Hamburglar.

Oh, I know who you're talking about from that description. Big cheeks. There's some names we can say. i think we're safe to say uh jazz who worked there she was the floor manager no idea who you're talking about and uh she she went up to jazz and this is what i was told i wasn't there for this and she said uh hey i'm fucking this new comic could you give him an audition spot and she was like like, fine. And then I got an audition spot. Wow. Way to fuck your way up in this business.

Yeah, right? But I remember an early lesson. This was like for early comedy. I was new. I was so new. And I was theatrical enough to do fine. But I had a joke about, I said, I never know what to do with a woman's hair during fellatio. So I just ended up braiding it

and I went on from there and the joke like bombed and I went up to the Hamburglar and I said that joke is so good and she was like they don't know what fucking fellatio is you fucking idiot and I was like oh right like different rooms

I mean most people at the room probably didn't know English, period. So I had to do, now when I do the joke, I do a full act out. I go, I don't know what to do with a woman's hair during. Very funny. Boy, does that make me. So how did you start? What year? That year? Paige is on lawyer duty.

She's guarding us. We couldn't get shot callers in time to shock people. That's how I laugh sometimes. You know how I like to laugh? It's an old school way of laughing. Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha. Ha. Ha.

Ha. What year did you start it? Whoa. Whoa. Oh my God. Son of a bitch. God. Oh man.

Not that that would have anything to do with what we're talking about. We have to do it as a game next time to have a shot caller. I really think it would be so good. I can tell you what year I started that, which is a completely different thing than what we're talking about. McDonald's is what I meant to say. When did you start at McDonald's? Oh, yeah. You don't need to know when I started that.

It has nothing to do with what we're talking about. Nothing at all. That's right. McDonald's. I started at McDonald's in 2016, 2015, or 2016. Great, great. Yeah. And what about you?

When I first started going there, I went with Rosebud. Uh-huh. Because Rosebud was just finally working there. Every name we say on this is going to start like this. I went with Kenny. Okay, we're going to do it. Here we go. But this podcast, you guys have just got to bleep everything out. There's going to be like this i went with okay we're gonna do it here we go yeah but this podcast you guys just gotta bleep everything out it's gonna be a lot of you know she doesn't you know she doesn't this is just the part of her life that she doesn't

yeah like no these just like so okay let me just see if i can like capture a little bit of history so it used to be called something else and it was like, it's changed locations many times. Something else. That's so funny. It was called Burger King. Burger King. It was called Burger King. Not Roy Rogers. And basically it was like, I actually went to it when I was in college, I think freshman year, because there was a karaoke. They had like a karaoke bar at some point.

That's about right. And we went there as a karaoke and had jello shots, and it was a different location. But it's when you go to Times Square, there's people that are barking you into clubs. Barking meaning they're trying to sell tickets. And these people are sometimes not even associated with the club at all. They're just hired separately. They'll tell you Kevin Hart's going to be at McDonald's. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They actually look at you,

they see what you look like, and then they say whatever they think you want. So if white people walk by, it was Louis C.K. If black people went by, it was Chappelle. Like, if it was Hispanic people, they would say Fluffy. Keep going. Indian? It's easy.

It's easy. Russell Peters. I did the pause for fun. There are none. Russell Peters I was I had to pause for fun there are none Asian you got some Asian comics yeah you know who it would be it would be

Ali Wong Dat Fan Dat Fan you see anyone Asian like we got Dat Fan tonight shout out Dat Fan you got somebody Native American That's real crazy. Did you see anyone Asian like, we got dad fan tonight? Shout out dad fan. And you got somebody Native American? We got a comedian named Eagle?

I don't know. Hey, that's true. Yeah, yeah. But it's so, these guys, it's amazing. This is how busy Times Square is because these guys are not smooth or aggressive. There's one guy, he literally has a light that flashes in your face. That's how aggressive we're talking. Like the way you'd get a deer in a trap.

It flashes in your face. They go, comedy? And these are people who didn't make plans. They're drunk. They have a date. They want to impress them and think this is going to be somewhere nice. So we all started at McDonald's when it was at the 47th Street location. Is that correct?

47th and Broadway? Something like that. Yeah, I guess so. We weren't there before. It used to have different locations. That's where the McDonald's is. Yeah, that's where the McDonald's is. You have to have specifics.

Yeah. I think it's one block. I think it might have been at a different location when me and Lucas started. Yeah, we had an elevator. Wow. I think we had one block. I think it might have been at a different location when me and Lucas started. Yeah, we had an elevator. Wow. I think we had an elevator. Yeah. We had an elevator, which was...

It was on 42nd, I think. Or not. Was it on 42nd? Yeah, so it was... Maybe not. It was the grossest thing ever. And it was... Grosser than the one I know.

Way grosser. What was grosser? Describe it to me. So you walk into this place. The walls are this, like, orangish-yellow, right? one i know way gross oh it was grosser describe it to me so you walk into this place the walls are this like orangish yellow right like they haven't been painted in a long time there's there's like flyers of shows that don't exist anymore all over yeah the walls there's like pamphlets right and then there's a service elevator i can't remember that well that opens up

and then you get and then 20 people that just got sold tickets go and go. They don't know where they're going. I see. They get pushed into the elevator and they open up onto the thing and then it smells like paint or bleach. Yeah.

Oh, God. And were those shows good at all? Not from my experience. I was there for literally a second, and then it moved to the other location. I auditioned there, and then it moved to the second location. And you auditioned for Ronald?

No. No. Oh, a different person. I auditioned... For the Hamburglar. No, I auditioned for... Hamburglar? He wore a suit, and he was big.

Yeah, he made the thong song. Yeah. He was a big dude? The artist who made the thong song. Yeah. Oh. I think we can say he'd be okay with that. Yeah.

Cisco. Yeah, I auditioned. Cisco, who's been there a long time. He was the booker at the time. Yes. Yeah. And was he, because he's so sweet to me now. He's such a nice guy.

But when I first met him, he was harsh in a way that I sometimes miss in comedy, because it kept people in line. Yep. But some of those older dudes were very harsh. And especially like, if I went long. I mean, they put me in my place. And he once said to me, he said, if you're still working here in three years, I'll come up behind you with a shotgun

and blow your head off. Which is what you need. Which is what I need, and it motivated me. I said, well, I better succeed so I don't get killed. Yeah. But when he auditioned you, was he, like, cold? Or were you the cool guy on the scene by this point? No.

I was, like, a month into comedy. Like, I was, like, so young into comedy, I was not the cool guy at all. Nick Alexander recommended me. I was just hanging. People tell you, you know, in the beginning the beginning they're like hang out at comedy club. So I go to hang out there and I'm sitting in this like weird makeshift

green room that you guys had. Yes. And they're like oh we don't have the check spot person is not here. And then Nick's like oh Eagle's funny.

And I'm like yeah I'm funny. And then he was like all right you're up kid. And I go up and I fucking got laughs you know. You were one month in?

I don't think I was one month in, but I was less than a year for sure. He was doing the pit. That was the best thing he was doing. Yeah, I was easily maybe six months in. Yeah. I got in, and he was like, hey, you can come back. I was like, all right, cool. I thought I was on top of the world. That sounds a little more like OC, that impression.

Listen, man, I'm doing impressions. The dick. You were there slightly before him. I was on top of the world. That sounds a little more like OC. That impression. Listen, man, I'm doing impressions. I did it. You were there slightly before him. I was just showing up occasionally, and I was doing the same thing. I got passed, and then I never got sent an avail email or text. Oh, yeah, you got to fight for that avail.

Right, I never got, like, they're like, you're in, and then never again. And I was like, well, I guess I'm not. You got to be gotta be like hey man you can you give me something i could send the veils to or yeah and they didn't do that at that time they didn't give me any they were just like you're all good you'd like that like i remember when i started working at mcdonald's i was like starting to do other rooms there was a comic who told me oh you should stop telling people you work at mcdonald's They will judge you negatively. Which I always disagree with. I disagree with it to this day.

I disagree. Of course. I think you should work. And this comic who said it to me, I was like, oh, fucking And that room does make you stronger. But back then, did it have the same stink on it? Did it get worse over the years? Better? So,

when we all started, there there was a we don't care if you're uh original or good we just care if you do well it was really really really bad at that time like they did not care if you went and did an eddie murphy bit they would just be like are you doing full-on eddie murphy yeah. I mean, I think that's how McDonald's is permanently. I think. I don't know. I doubt that's changed.

I feel like the whole time we were there, it was like that. It changed in the sense that people aren't really wrecking those guys anymore. Okay, okay. But I do remember

one time I saw I saw a comic and I won't say this comic's name because I feel bad for them but they did. I saw them do a bit. And then the next day I saw Kareem Green do it. And I know it's Kareem's bit.

And I saw Kareem do it and I was like beat for beat. Beat for beat. And I was like what the fuck? And I know maybe I don't think I'm wrong. It's Kareem's bit. It's got to be Kareem's bit. It's Kareem's bit. Kareem's a phenomenal comic.

Kareem's a phenomenal comic. And it had like, but when I first saw it. It had his type of style probably. Yeah. And I'd never seen, I had never, I'd never seen a comic do that, that fully. I don't know whether that's a problem around the country with road stuff i feel like you know some more about like like the real road than i do like how much is thievery i was just shocked as like a new comic i came from like the the you know the the mulanies and the pete

holmes and like stealing jokes would be insane but sort of witness it at the same club in the same room was wild as a person that did did the road for a long, long time, there is things that are considered stock. Right? Sure. And basically, if you want to do that bit, everyone's given it a stamp of a thing that we can all say. But no one actually did that.

You know what I mean? No one was like, you know what? Here's a bit. Everyone can have it. Like, literally just everybody eventually. Like, one person stole it and was like, what are you going to do about it? And then someone else did that.

And it just kept spreading. Sure. Until it became a thing where it's just like, yeah, do your Michael Jackson impression. Sure. Right? Sure. Hey, what's caught in his throat?

You know? And then everybody's doing that. Yeah, what's caught in his throat? And then everybody's doing that. Yeah. What is caught in his throat? Eagle's just like, I have a new idea. What is caught in Michael Jackson's throat? It's children's cum, if you want to. What?

Oh, my God. That's the joke? Holy shit. I thought it was going to be baby dicks, but close enough. You got it. Yeah. I think I just made it better than theirs, but it's more original when children's come.

This episode is brought to you by a real pain from searchlight pictures comes one of the buzziest films at Sundance film festival, a real pain written, directed and starring Oscar nominee, Jesse Eisenberg, alongside Emmy award winner, Kieran Culkin. Witness a hilarious and moving story about two mismatched cousins as they tour through Poland to honor their beloved grandmother. The adventure takes a turn when the pair's old tensions resurface against the backdrop of their family history.

See A Real Pain only in theaters November 15th. This is an ad by BetterHelp. What comes to mind when you hear the word gratitude? Maybe it's a daily practice, or maybe it feels hard to be grateful right now. Don't forget to give yourself some thanks by investing in your well-being. BetterHelp is the largest online therapy provider

in the world, connecting you to qualified professionals via phone, video, or message chat. Let the gratitude flow. Visit betterhelp.com to learn more and save 10% on your first month. That's BetterHelp, H-E-L-P.com. So then it moved to the location

that I ended up joining at, which was, that was better. That was a better location. I just remember I went there, it had a green room, sad, small, and some of the comics who worked there were big. They were big. Yes.

Rest in peace. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Very physically. They didn't walk very much. I mean, Kenny Ortega, rest in peace. Rest in peace. Rest in peace. His opening line, do we all remember it?

He'd walk on stage. Made it. Made it. Man. Yo, he was a killer, too. He was a killer. Really good at crowd work. I studied him.

I studied him and Ken Boyd. I always bring up Ken Boyd as like, I feel like I stole. You know how the same way Elvis stole from black people in general? That's how I feel about Ken Boyd? You know how the same way Elvis stole from black people in general? That's how I feel about Ken Boyd. I stole all my charisma from Ken Boyd. Man, he is like, wow. So charismatic. Ken Boyd was nuts.

Ken Boyd, whenever people tell me I'm likable, I'm like, you don't fucking know likable. You can watch a guy just take someone's food and eat it, and then everyone liked it. Ken used to start sets, he'd be like, anyone got any gum? Anyone got any gum? I even watched a guy just take someone's food and eat it and then everyone liked it. That's, Ken used to start sets, he'd be like, anyone got any gum? Anyone got any gum? And he'd like,

get gum. Chew gum in a cool way. Chew gum. Once in a while, when I'm in a club that I don't give a shit about, I will go up chewing gum and I feel cool.

And it's because I want to just be Ken Boyd, baby. I had to block him on Instagram. I've talked about this because I posted a picture of me and he said,

damn, you got fat. And I was like, I don't want to had to block him on Instagram. I've talked about this because I posted a picture of me and he said, damn, you got fat. And I was like, I don't want to be called fat on Instagram. This is the most hilarious John Markle story I've ever heard. He called me fat and I blocked it. I'm going to be honest, though. John Markle was the person that I've never seen him haze more than

anybody else. Really? Did he haze you a lot? Easily, dude. Easily. Well, in the beginning, there was hazing. And again, it's the kind of hazing where looking back, you're like, is some of this good? Because I see some comics behave in a way where I'm like, I wish Patrice O'Neill was around to tell you you suck. And instead, me and other comics were just texting about how much we hate you.

And I mean this in a very complimentary way what i'm about to say because i've actually said this about you to others in a complimentary way is i've never seen someone since i've been doing stand-up go from like essentially just bad to really fucking really good like great yeah like you. Like when you came in at ***, there was some nights where I was like, oh, this nigga sucks. But after every set, bomb, like you'd bomb. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you'd write a joke in your laptop. And I thought, he's a psychopath. He's going to get good. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And sure enough, you got phenomenal. I remember when you beat me in that competition. And I went, I tipped my hat. I'm like, yo, he's fucking phenomenal. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you fucking did it. Like you like figured it out and and i know if ken was making fun of you at that time it might have just been when you were

bad sure what he used to do you got so good like you worked at it for the back of the room he go he go boo and we're boo that that's the back of the room one time that's a lot one time he bombed so badly and then he got all the comics to wait outside the room so he could finally get an applause break because he wasn't gonna get one when he got off that's what ken had wow that's some hazing yeah it was it was like really and i was like this is a little much you know like props to you to you because you fucking man you figured it out on such a high level like it was such a flip well i just did so many spots there. Like, that's what, that's whenever people

were like, you're still working on ****. It was like, I got, I was doing, Still working what? Oh.

McDonald's. We're going to have to just leave out this one. I still work at McDonald's. I did, I did like, truly, I feel like I did

every check spot there for a year. Maybe I keep exaggerating that, but I feel like I did four check spots every weeknight. On the weekends, I was doing six check spots. Christmas, I remember doing eight shows

a day for no money. And you love Christmas. I love Christmas. I'm the most Christian guy I know. You sacrificed your favorite holiday for jokes. I feel like I think what it did for me

is like i was doing like roast battle stuff and like figuring out like joke writing and then that like also kept me from just being like jokey nerdy guy because i remember i was ken boyd was hosting a 1am show he was hosting it and he opened it and he was talking about like i like a bitch that when you when you finger her she like licks the juices off off your fingers and then he did like an act out where he like and his act out so incredible he's miming like he he could have gone to the lecoq france clowning school it was astounding how accurate it was and he like did where him like him like scooping up the the dribbles of the juices and then lick and he put his whole hand in his mouth not like comics would be like you know like fucking slurp on it and then i went up there like so i went to college

for musical theater and uh fuck that camera died keep going talk ego yo the the the thing that that's amazing about it to me that like i hope people watching this can understand is that shit might sound crazy that kills crowds like that in-depth detail of an act out makes crowds lose their fucking mind dude that's so funny when you're on stage doing that much because it is a risk you're you're making a fool out of yourself for the sake of painting the picture for them he was a true clown and like and like and not in the mean way. In the real, like, I cannot believe he could do the things he's doing. Like, with his body.

Alright, well, if that camera fucking... I hate tech, Paige. Alright, I'm gonna turn this to Paige. This is gonna be the new camera for Paige. This is gonna be, like, the worst angle. Here we go. God damn it. Just let it go.

Let it go. No, I will never let anything go, ever. There we go god damn it it's just not on her let it go let it go no i will never let anything go ever there we go there you go great can't wait to upload all these files for dave so um it's gonna have your it's not it's not your podcast if your foot isn't in half of the It's true. There's a guy. This is a nightmare. Okay, so let's get into, because there's someone we were going to have on the podcast, a potential guest, and he was like, I can't. I'm in the middle of a lawsuit with McDonald's right now. No way. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's suing them or they're suing him? I don't know. No, Ronald loves suing people.

Direct quote? That's a direct quote? That's a direct quote. I don't like it. Why are we doing this podcast? I don't know. No, no. We're going to bleep it all.

We're going to bleep it all. And by the way, guys, we are comedians. We're making up all of this. This is an improv exercise. None of it. So yeah, that was a thing. He was just like, I've done so many lawsuits in my life. And I was like,

uh-huh. Interesting. So I'm trying to think of the worst. We should bring up, let me say the Bill Burr story real quick because this is a classic I brought. Classic story. And were you there?

I was not. I was not there. So right before you jump into this, I want to say something real quick, if you don't mind. We are complimenting the Hall of Famers from McDonald's. This is very much us saying they had things about their stand-up. That's immaculate. Just undeniably great, talented performers. Everything we said just now was compliments.

Let's just make that clear. For sure. A lot of people think of McDonald's and they think, oh, these workers are like hacks or they're this or they're that. They're better than a lot of fucking comedians. I say this all the time about McDonald's. And what is really interesting about them is that of all the places now that are bloodsuckers that are just looking at your your numbers and your analytics

and how many people you can draw and what your credits are uh ronald walked in the room and went wow they're really loud right now they really like this guy that is absolutely true and you don't get that damn near anywhere else it's yeah we go in and go is this person killing guess they're gonna get more spots yeah that's all that fucking matter yes and the reason why i worked there so much is that for the first month i was there i just did straight a for 15 minutes every single time yeah and it and every time he walked in and he was like, whoa. And then next week I had 20 spots. Which easily is what?

15 cents? I mean that. When you think about minutes, yeah, it was 15 cents a minute probably. For sure. Yes. There's lots. And Kenny, who I i just i do like talking about kenny it just feels like he he was a he died he had covid yeah but he was an incredible

crowd work comedian wow it's an incredible crowd work he went through a phase he was in his era he would have done great posting clips of his crowd work he would have fucking yeah but if he would have posted them yeah it sometimes just doesn't click for for people how to do that but yes of course i mean he could just control a room any any like bad room he could control and i think there's a thing of you have a lot of uh i call them brooklyn comics that's not exactly the exact term but you know they care about jokes they care about they don't want anything i don't think brooklyn comics care about jokes at all they don't they don't want anything to be hacky. I don't think Brooklyn comics care about jokes at all. They don't want anything to be hacky. There's a certain kind of comic that goes like,

if it's hacky, I will probably sue me, Brooklyn comics. I love it. Ronald's the one that's going to sue you. These Brooklyn comics, they can fucking suck my dick. But there's something about... I feel like

it's the closest to a black room that we had in New York. 100% the closest to a black comedy club. What is... God damn it, dude. We need to get a jar. So I can lose even more money before the lawsuit? That's the jar.

The jar's for the lawyer. Would you say, do you think that's a true statement? That McDonald's is the blackest comedy club in all of New York City, without a doubt. How would you define, because I did a podcast recently where it was like me and another white guy stumbling over why it's okay to say a room of what the black room is. How would you define it exactly there's black people in the crowd yeah you go to mcdonald's on any given night and it's majority black people in the crowd which is kind of shocking you don't see other

comedy clubs like this is how i always just say and 50 50 is huge 50 50-50 is huge, man. The next closest club has like 10% black people in the crowd. Max. Yeah. All the minorities put in the 10. You could actually... Yeah, I count. You would do well because your dad's white, so you really fit in.

Yo, we out here, baby. We out here. I used to say McDonald's was almost a way to test out your jokes and make sure they were okay with black people. Or you're like, let me make sure I'm not up here, you know, shucking and jiving. I'm going to go to McDonald's and see if this is decent. I remember I saw Gina Yashir super early. And she had a bit, it was about Chinese men in China.

And like if the audience got kind of quiet, she'd be like, fuck you. I performed that in China for a room of chinese men and for me my rule was always would i be willing to if i had anything about race would i do it in a room where i was the only white guy in that room and if i wasn't then i wasn't confident in in the joke over the thing and i feel like that's a really true thing but how would you describe other than there being 50 50 50 or a majority black audience what would you say in terms of like stylistically or what's more important or or is there what's the difference i don't think there's a difference there's no i think the only difference is uh being genuinely yourself they can smell a fraud sure like black people black can smell a fraud. Sure. Like black people, black crowds smell a fraud.

For real. Also the level of forgiveness is way less. Yes, that's true too. If you are not good, there is no like, oh let me spin this. Maybe this next joke will be good. No, they're done. The forgiveness level is gone. It's very hard to

win a black crowd back over once you've lost their trust. Where white crowds are a lot easier to win back over. Sure. But black people give it up way better. When black people laugh you feel like you're the best comedian ever. You're like, this is crazy.

Who's the comment that says when black people laugh they change locations? Everyone who works at McDonald's. Everyone who works at McDonald's said Everyone who works at McDonald's said that at some point. Has somebody given me crazy amounts of money in McDonald's once? There was a guy that

came by for a while who was the worst audience member. His kids would heckle, he'd heckle, and then he'd hand you $100 after the set. Every time. How crazy money are you talking about? I have a really good money story from McDonald's. Yeah?

I'm doing a late night show. That's rare, by the way. A really good money story. Yeah, it's very rare. I'm doing a late night show, you know, one in the morning show, whatever. Weekend. So it wasn't empty, but it wasn't sold out. And there's a hood dude in the back with his girl,

counting money, stacks of money on the back with his girl counting money, stacks of money on the table, like Monopoly money. He's breaking it up into different stacks. And I know this. I'm like, oh, you're a drug dealer. You're trying to impress your girl, right? Cool. So immediately, I go, fuck my set.

I'm going to be like, hey, man, seems like you got lots of money. You got lots of money. Prove it. Give me some. And he just gives me a stack of money. He comes up to the stage and hands me easily like $1,000. And I just hurry up and get done with my set and leave immediately. Because I was like, I don't want him to ask for that money back.

Yo, that's so funny. He's clearly not from New York. No New York drug dealer would flaunt their money like that. And I was like, I am going to leave with this money as soon as I can. The second I got the light, I was like, have a good night, you guys. And I dipped. Incredible. That's so much money.

Oh, and I was so broke at the time. Like, incredibly broke. Yeah. And it, man, it made me so happy. You had to be broke to literally be like, hey, nice money you got. Could you give me some he just walked up to the stage and like smacked it on the stage it was like you a funny nigga and i was like thanks and i just like i hadn't told a joke hadn't told a joke but when i asked to give money the crowd laughed and he thought like oh this guy's great and just gave

me money so let's let's talk about the security at McDonald's. That's one of my favorite things. So my man Kendall. That's one of them. Was there someone else before Kendall? There was a guy with a mustache that wore a bulletproof vest that used to get changed in our green room. He would just come in and get down to his tighty-whities and then he'd put on his bulletproof vest. In front of all the women comics they had there? In front of all the women comics there. Why did he have a

bulletproof vest? That is really freaking scary. So, every time he did it, I just would, I was the only one, and everyone hated him, but I found him really entertaining. I was like, what's the bulletproof vest for? And he'd be like,

you know, you have to wear this wear this actually if you're in security here in New York. And it's like, that's just not true. But he had all these stories about being stabbed a bunch of times. And he would do these in his tighty-whities. They were like stained. He'd be doing that at a locker room, like leg on the chair. My favorite thing about the security at McDonald's is sometimes they were really good you know like they're like tough guys and then sometimes they're just complete pussies that would let everything happen yep yeah we're like yeah remember when uh

when when blues got spit on you guys remember that who got spit on blues is this the person we're talking we're talking about earlier? Another music genre? Jesus fucking Christ. When she got spit on, the medians had to drag the fucking people downstairs and get into a fight because security locked the door because they were scared. I just remember

Kendall, there was one. First, Kendall's always he's going to watch your set so it'd always be like hey love the new material and i was like cool did you see when the guy ran up to me on stage he's like yeah i didn't was that a new bit i was like no i was in danger why would that be a bit there was one there was one i just remember so distinctly it was there was like some very like methed out looking couple and I think I said

to the guy you look like Steve Buscemi after the meth or something nothing great but it got like oh

and then when I left he got like right up in my face something like an O to instigate some shit I hate when crowds O and he like when I got outside

in the bar area he kind of rushed up on me and I like looked towards Kendall, and he was making sure his girlfriend was signing the check while he was in my face, like, you want to fuck with me? You want to fuck with me? And I just thought,

that so encapsulates it's just about getting that money, and we could not have mattered. I mean... The security job was to not let people out of the building. Their job was not to protect the comedians. Not to protect the comedians.

At all. And I got charged on stage. Like, someone walked on the stage to mess me up. I jump off the opposite side of the stage, and then I walk up to Kendall outside, after running basically out of the room, and then I walk up to Kendall outside, after running basically out of the room, and just stood next to Kendall, and he goes, and he started talking to me about whatever was happening in the news that day.

And I go, you know I'm supposed to be on stage? I'm like, technically on stage right now? There's nobody on stage right now, because someone just charged me. And he was just like, huh. And I go, huh. Like. And he was just like, huh? And I go, huh? Like, I literally was like, we could not believe what's happening.

The craziest heckle I ever got was at McDonald's. I had a dude in the front row. I get done with my set. Packed house. Great set. Everything seems normal. Fine. You might have heard this story.

He's like this fat, ho-billy white guy. He just, I get the light and he goes goes i'm tired of all this niggerdom and i didn't all i could think was like depending on how i respond to this there's gonna be a brawl right because it's a very black room it's like i don't know what to do in this so i was just like i got the light just ignore it just do your last bit and get the fuck off stage. So that's what I did. And then he tried to fight me outside. Well, he told you he was tired of it.

And you did not respect him. Well, if you go back to the old episode with Sam Morrison, he talks about a very sad. I mean, this was a place where... This was a place, if you wanted to know, like, the politics of the rest of America and the world, you'd find them out.

Absolutely. And, like, you know, to be a gay comic in this space, you had to be a very particular kind of comic. You had to be assertive. You had to be aggressive because the moment you talked

about anything gay, you were going to have some people audibly go, stop this gay shit. Hey, yo! Pause! Pause! No homo! go, stop this gay shit. Yo! Pause! Pause! No homo! Yo, stop! I don't do that back home where I'm from!

It's like a wide range of homophobia. It's not good, but at least you get to know what the world is. You know, and I don't think he worked there again after that. No, he never came back. What happened? He was just performing, and I think someone said, if I believe,

it was like, no more of that gay shit. It was the F. He said it, or they said the F? No more of that F stuff. Yeah. What if I said that's what we were going to call the club?

Then we had to bleep it twice. But no, it was bad and OC like came in to like help I guess but it wasn't quite in time no just you could be left hanging like when I was there especially with the check spot you could be left there and suddenly you're doing 25 minutes 30 minutes

I've been on stage for 40 minutes I always say like I got in super early you know fucking couple months in the comedy you don't have anything and i remember thinking like check spot eight minutes i can do eight minutes i was like it might not be the best eight minutes i got eight minutes worth of material and they were like yeah it's check spot and i remember my first official check spot doing like 35 and you're just up there just trying to stay up there. You're like, I don't even know if I need to be funny at this point.

I just want you guys to not throw stuff, and I guess I stay on stage. Like, I don't. But again, that's why it was special. There's not that many clubs in the world you get that anymore. I think there was a time, like, when you hear about, I don't know, the Cellar back in the 80s, you might be on stage for a long time. You might do this many spots, or it might get this rowdy. But these days, there's no club you could work this much in New York.

There's too many comics and that's why it was special. Spotlight, blinking, microphone going in and out. It makes you good. Sure does. If you could do well there, you could do well anywhere. I didn't have too many crowd work clips from there because I was scared if I left my phone in the back of the room, it would get stolen.

About three weeks ago, I was working at McDonald's. Outside, had my phone. A kid yanked my phone out of my hand and just ran away. Oh my god. Wait, you were on stage? I was not on stage. I just walked outside

the club, right out of my hand. This kid was so fast and I chased him for two blocks before I realized, what am I going to do? I'm going to be this adult beating up a 16-year-old black kid in the middle of the street. No one's going to understand what's happening. You can probably bleep that, too. But we cannot have any extra bleeps in this episode. It's going to be all bleeps. There was a moment where I was like,

what if I catch him? What if I catch him? You're going to bleep 16-year-old black kid and they're going to be like, 16-year-old name of comedy club black kid? What? He's beating up a 16-year-old comedy club? Oh God, I forget what I was going to say. But okay, the Bill Burr story. Oh, I want to say what I was going to say. But, okay, the Bill Burr story.

Oh, I want to say, so if you listen to Sam Morrison, you can find out what club we're talking about, maybe. If you listen to Kareem Green, we had a great story from Kareem Green. I don't know what John Mark was talking about right now. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Don't listen to those, actually.

Take that back. Don't listen to them. Don't do any investigation. Please don't. This is all made up. This is all, yeah. The Bill Burr story is, and Usama was there. I came later that night, and I saw Usama look mad.

I've never seen Usama look mad before. Usama loves Bill Burr. Yeah. And so Bill Burr came. To be fair, he had a big mustache. He was filming King of Long Island. What was it called? King of Staten Island.

And he went up to the floor manager and i've always said i don't blame her because she's not running a comedy club she's she's running a restaurant and she just has to keep it going so bill burr came and he said he's running a fucking madhouse can i do can i do a spot and uh she's like i can give you the email for the booker. And Bill Burr, biggest comic, one of the top three, top five, still,

and he said, oh, I just sold out Madison Square Garden. She goes, where would I have heard you? And then he goes, I don't know. I sold out Madison Square Garden.

She asked him, like, for his credentials. Uh-huh. And then he did. He gave them to her. And she was like, okay, yeah. Oh, yeah? Wait, wait, wait.

I've never heard it this way. Yes, that's the real story. Wait, so she actually just didn't believe him. Uh-huh. Yeah. Oh, that's funny. Then someone behind her went, no, you're making a mistake. And she just goes, like, she just did like a like a shake off i believe you know the way mark

walberg says if he was on the planes in 9-11 9-11 wouldn't have happened he would have stopped it i believe that with bilber performing at mcdonald's that if i had been there i would have been like no a huge mistake is about to happen we you trust me I stake my whole everything on this. Everything I built up. Give him my spot. Because if they got one picture of Bill Burr on that stage, it would have increased ticket sales forever. They'd eat forever.

Ronald has no idea the mistake that was made. Well, Ronald tried to rectify it. He went on Twitter the next day from McDonald's Twitter account and said Bill Burr, so sorry for the mishap yesterday. Would love to have you any time. That's after he already had blasted him on the podcast. And he was all like, Bill Burr, you know, it's nice to get checked once in a while.

You know, not everyone knows who I am. And it felt, you know, nice to know. Yeah, I remember that, yeah. He called the McDonald's on the podcast, too. And then I saw Bill Burr the next day. I was hosting a West Side Comedy Club, and I went over to Bill. I never met him, and I was going to bring him up. So I said, Bill, I work at McDonald's.

We were all so upset that they didn't know who you were. That's so insane. And he was like, okay. And I was like, whoa, what the fuck? I wasn't going to ask you if I could open for you i was just telling a story but he was he was very much like did not give a shit he was he's been nice to me since i've met i saw him at another time but but he probably had something on his mind but for me it was like humiliating well i think for him it was a kind of a painful check like he was like i thought if i walked into any comedy club they would be so excited.

And I was so wrong, and I had expectations of people freaking out, like this is a huge deal, and a carpet getting rolled out. And this place was like... Once again, he did not walk into a comedy club. He walked into a fast food chain. McDonald's.

So I was trying to think Any other Stories from your time Or did you want to read some of the Yelp reviews? These are my favorite Now we can't read about the one incident Don't read them verbatim I'm going to riff them

But there's one Famous incident there That I want to have the person on the podcast to talk about. So don't quote any of those. Do you know the incident I'm talking about with the person who was deformed slightly?

That was a crowd work clip that would not have done well. I don't know what you guys are talking about. There was an incident of someone in the audience not looking great, maybe because of some kind of accident with fire, and then maybe they were being a tough audience member. Who's to say?

This is not funny at all, by the way. Go ahead and continue. I'm just thinking of something funny I watched the other day as you were talking. Oh, another horrifying this guy's just like I was watching bum fights I watched like Family Guy

and Family Guy is so funny so innocently funny and I was watching that and that's making me laugh while you tell this story now continue yeah yeah yeah alright what's your review

I was called the n-word you didn't have to do one about Eagle right out the gate immediately what if Eagle wrote that that Eagle wrote that about performing at the club You didn't have to do one about Eagle right out the gate. Immediately? What if Eagle wrote that about performing at the club? By a comedian. And that is before he even went on stage.

Before he went on stage. It's in, and it has one star, and it says avoid the play. Oh. All right. So are we ready for that? Before he went on stage. Oh, my God. Mwah.

I feel like this review was written by a comic. It's too funny. It was so funny. That's so funny. It was so, that's so funny. Oh my God. So good. The manager got into a physical altercation with a terrorist family on Saturday night because the customer made a complaint about how he mishandled the heckler. Wow.

Fist fight. Literal fist fight. Oh, I wish I'd been there for that. I was there for that one. You were there? You know in the old school videos where they're like, let him at him. That's the way Sean tried to fight him.

Yeah? Yeah, like, hey! Ronald? Put him up, put him up, put him up. I'm trying to think if there are any other fights. There's one big epic fight where this is where Kendall actually activated.

Like the Hulk. What happened? Fuck, man. I might as well say it and we'll bleep it. We're going to have to go through this episode and bleep. We're going to bleep this one.

You have to do a funny sound effect. So this is, it's, so they can't see my head, it's. Aurora? Jesus Christ. This is my favorite.

Jesus Christ. I think, to be honest, when we were saying this is going to really change things, I think there is something where people are going to be like, this is a mystery, and it's very fun. We're going to make people

go down a hole. There was a crazy heckler and there was like a young son who was like jacked and his mom was a heckler and Kendall went up and like,

he got on stage, this young son and Kendall like, one arm just knocked him off the stage. And there's video, there's different angles. It is incredible.

It's an amazing story. You really could utilize it. If you utilized it the right way with social media, there's a restaurant chain where the waiter is mean to you, roasts you intentionally. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And if you advertise it as like, you want to see a fight break out, come here.

I think if they advertised it as the worst fast food restaurant in the world, it would do great. I also think that. I also. Can you imagine if they tried to be worse? That's the problem. The problem is if they advertise it as the worst, it'll get worse and it'll probably get shut down. I'm astounded. and it'll probably get shut down. I mean, for me, the most degrading moments are like

when the green room, which was truly, truly a closet with a bench on it, when they started using that for storage of other things. Oh, we weren't allowed to be in the green room. It was moments like that where I felt like, one day I'm going to make a podcast episode about this club where I shit all over it. It really upset me too because they they make it so there's no green room and then they yell at you for being loud and you're like if i would have had a green room

where we can talk and be relaxed before getting on stage this wouldn't have to happen it was it that that was the degrading i mean i think when i look back the reasons why i'm like oh yeah i'm ready to i think it deserves to be talked about is just because the ways we were we were treated just the like the working for free for so long you gotta pay if you want like a water you gotta pay for like anything i was that was what i was just going to talk about the water so there was a in the about, the water. So there was a, in the green room for a long time, there was a like a

whatever, the water thing that lets the water out. A water cooler. And they stopped paying to fill up the water anymore. And so one day, Richie Redding walks into the club early to pick up his check, and he just sees the manager having a hose

and is filling up the water container with the hose. No way. Yeah. It's like how cholera spreads. And that's exactly what he said. He was all like, can I have a bottle of water since I know where it comes from? And they're like, no. And he's like, well, that's the final straw.

Yeah. Everybody's got a final straw story with them. What was your final straw? I can't remember. See, for me, I really hung in there, and I was doing less, and I was canceling. You know what? Final straw is always light with them, because you'll come back. You'll come back and jump on stage.

Well, I remember people being fired. I remember people being fired, and then they'd be back. And it was just like, I learned a lot about how the world works from that place. But for me, my final straw, well, I remember, so Kenny Ortega, rest in peace, he was on stage and they

dropped checks on him. And we talked about the check spot before you got here, just explaining it. And he walked off stage. And he's like, I mean, he worked there five days a week for years and years and years seven shows and uh so i i went there once and like there was a combo of like the mic wasn't working which was pretty standard and it had like a feedback thing for a second and my ear was ringing in pain and i almost stepped off the stage and got hurt and then they dropped checks checks. And I said, you know what?

And ultimately, though, I would have stayed. But the audiences started feeling so bad. I said, I'm not even learning anything. I would put up with a lot. See, that's the problem a lot of times with McDonald's. It makes you better on one side of stand-up. It makes you a better performer. It makes you more confident. It makes you ready to deal with things on your feet.

You know what I mean? Like, ready to go at all times and know how to, like, improv shit. But it's so bad for writing. Like, it's so incredibly bad for writing that if you don't leave at a certain time, it can almost turn you into a hack. Like, it, like, it, like, it,

because you're, like, it's sink or swim. And that's not good for writing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's not good for writing. You'd have to fight. I think you just would have to fight to be, like, it's sink or swim, and that's not good for writing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's not good for writing. You'd have to fight. I think you just would have to fight to be like, to not kill. Yeah, you have to be okay with kind of being the worst on the show sometimes, even though you might not be the worst comic.

I feel that way all the time. I think I did the worst on the show today, but I'm the only one that tried something. You could possibly be the best comic in reality, but the worst comic on the show. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. I think they should advertise it as the, the probably the only club right now in New York where you can go see people do

a hack Indian accent for a big chunk of their set in their white. If that's what you're looking for. Paige, do you have any questions about us working at this club? So I've never been to McDonald's before. Would you recommend that I go to McDonald's at least once? Yes. Fortunately, but not now.

I mean, it's not what it was. Oh, it's true. I had a time machine. It's not what it was. No, nowadays, it's just a different thing. The caliber of the people people not to say that people there are not getting funny because they are getting funny but there was a level of that these guys were at that work there at like the whatever the 30 hour the 30 shows a week guys well well

i'll say it like this like when we were working there it seemed like every two to three months a comic would graduate to the cellar you go from literally the worst club to the best club yeah like a direct route it was like a weird training ground to get to the cellar it was like every two or three months a new comic was like moving to the cellar and like it was just like there's strong comics when we were working there yes yeah yeah it was highly. And that's what I was saying. Now it doesn't feel like that as much. But it was 30 shows a week in front of 300 people who were mad, who just got scammed. And that's my go-to story about McDonald's.

I will say they do numbers like a motherfucker. They sell. They sell tickets. Back then, those rooms, those big rooms would be fucking packed. Packed. And on Saturday night, they'd be white hot. I mean like especially at that early stage of my career, how big was that big room? 300.

300? I mean there'd be times it'd be sold out. Yeah. I mean I have no business performing for 300 people two years in, a year in, and I would. Yeah. And not for 25 minutes, which is what would happen a ton. Yeah. You're headlining suddenly.

You're like, God damn. Someone fucked up. Do you still talk to Ken Boyd? I mean, I haven't heard about Ken Boyd. I know he does the comics. Once in a blue moon. But, yeah. I think I might have unblocked him when I felt like I'd lost enough weight.

There you go. I remember once he commented, I posted a video of me from hip-hop class, and he commented like, damn, what a homo. And I had people message me like, hey, does your friend understand that? That's a derogatory term. And so I was trying to get a tape for America's Got Talent. This is my Ken Boyd story. I was trying to get a tape for America's Got Talent. This is my Ken Boyd story. I was trying to get a tape for America's Got Talent.

And at the time, Ken would bring me on stage by saying, this next comic is the gayest guy in the entire world. This next comic is the gayest guy I've ever met. John Marco Cerezi. It was the most hazing I've ever seen any comic go through. And so I said to him, I said, hey, man, fan of your work, big fan, thanks for keeping me strong. Thanks for keeping my ego in check.

So I'm trying to get a tape for America's Got Talent. Would you mind just for this next one, just this next one, to not bring me on stage by saying I'm the gayest comic you've ever met in your entire life? And he was like, okay, man, I got you. And then he went up and he called me the F word.

And I submitted it. Because I thought, well, now I got my sob story right there. Clearly I've been harassed at my workplace and didn't get it. Didn't get it. You know what America's Got Talent said? You know what they wrote back? They said, sorry, too gay for our show. They're like, who's the host?

Who's that host? God damn, that was so funny. I'm not the type to be like, yo, this is a bit. You got to put this on stage. You got to put that on stage. That's so funny. I'm not the type to be like, yo, this is a bit. You got to put this on stage. You got to put that on stage. That's so funny. Oh, my God. The only problem with the bit, and again, like, I don't say the F word on stage.

And I think the problem is when you tell a story where it was said, it feels so lame in its own way to not say the story that happened. But at the same time, people just react. It just is too, you know. That's fair. Boy, is that a funny podcast story, though. Oh, my God. That's what I'm always frustrated with. So all the other people can call me the F word?

Great. That's cool. It's funny and it's sad. It's sad and funny. It's like this weird, like, that's like a prior-esque story, dog. That shit is like sad and funny. Right. Right.

Maybe strong. Maybe strong. Unbelievably. That's so fucked up. I thought about it all the time. And it's partly why I would roast Ken as much as I did was because you got some great roasts about Ken. I would burn him because it was mostly because he was coming at people, like, you know,

so hard that I was like, I'm the only one who will do this. I feel like working at a... Like, I feel like I do... It's so funny how people's experiences with people are different. Oh, yeah. He loved you. Sure. I... He was like, this is my brother dude i just remember him being

so i remember because he didn't give me he didn't do the bad openings but he would absolutely give me the bad get off stage like so if i got off stage he's like like, guys, he has AIDS. I'm so sorry. I love saying for you, do you remember what I said to you? Sometimes if you'd bring me on, I'd go, give it up for Lucas. He's got to go back out and sell some more tickets. But we're really happy to have him. And sometimes it was just fucking right on the money. They would lose their mind.

I looked really homeless then. Yeah, back then, yeah. Unlike now, where I look totally camped. Anything else, Paige? Gorillas. I don't know. I mean, it was a special... I just miss what it was.

I mean, it was a special time in my life. I was going to say, I do feel like – I grew up in a somewhat diverse childhood but not – private school, all these things. Working at a – there were like Jewish white kids. There were regular white kids. Working at McDonald's. Diverse. I just feel like – I feel honestly like I learned how to I have jokes about race

and I feel like not to be too narcissistic but I feel like they're good I feel like they're nuanced and of a certain opinion I think it's because I felt like I just spent years working with black comics and comics that did race and we were all talking about that on stage and there was just like just it was just i got a i got a perspective from working i got a perspective from working at

mcdonald's that that was just just unique that i don't think i would have gone anywhere else and and you know what and i want to i want to i want to make sure to be specific about this a wide range of black people where like a lot of people will like like do like brooklyn and they'll be like i have black comedians on my show somebody booked me for a show the other day and it was my favorite way i've ever been booked for a show it was a black person booked me for a show in brooklyn and he said i'm brooking i'm booking you for this show in brooklyn because a lot of brooklyn shows book black. I'm trying to book niggas. And I was like, dog, that's actually really profound, though. I'm going to start sending that to people.

No, it is. You know how they're always like, I'm looking for a black comic or I'm looking for a woman for the show. You said that. There are these rooms in Brooklyn where they're so progressive and they're like, we have like black comics and it's like, don't get me wrong,

like they're black. You can't take black away from somebody. They're black. Of course. But, there is a certain type of black that they stay away from

and I'm like, that shit is gross. Like, and McDonald's almost said it. At McDonald's, they had every type of black. Yes.

But mostly, mostly. Mostly the other type of black. Mostly what? Uptown. Yeah, say black yeah mostly what Uptown yeah say it Lucas Uptown I didn't laugh at this

I did not laugh at this that's not funny and I don't agree with it yo you ever seen that thing they tear Chris Rock apart because he because he sat there when Louis said the N word

and yeah that was people hate that so it's like a thing you always have to be conscious of. It's HBO. It's Ricky Gervais, Jerry Seinfeld,

Chris Rock, and Louis C.K. And Louis had some bits where he said the word. And I'm sure he worked on the Chris Rock show. He had a strong relationship with Chris Rock.

Yeah. But him and Chris were saying it. And then Ricky Gervais kind of said it, but you could tell he had a little... He had a strong relationship with Chris Rock. But him and Chris were saying it. Ricky Gervais kind of said it, but you could tell he had a little... He was a little nervous. A little like he was from England, so it was like he didn't fully know the battle. And then Jerry was like, I talk about

cotton balls and umbrellas. Like, this is... Cotton balls sounds pretty racist to me. I think the reason why people are so mad at Chris Rock in that video is because Richie Gervais has a good time with it. It's because there was a white guy in the room going, this is very pleasurable.

The problem is, and this is what I always say to defend Chris Rock in that moment, is people are just so unrealistic on what they want to happen. What do you want Chris Rock to do? In the middle of an HBO production, punch Ricky Gervais in the face? It'd be funny if he just punched Ricky and said, Louie can say it. That would have been funny. And they were hazing Ricky the whole time. Yes.

Oh, man. Yeah. Like, Louie had one bit that I feel like is, that used it, that I feel like is a gold standard stand-up comedy bit oh it's a great bit and then about the word you're just making me say the word in my head which is like a brilliant bit and then you had one where i was like okay you just you just said the word you made the shit out of that coffee i don't know if you remember that i don't like that one i don't know yeah but it's but it really is like whoa you're getting away with it yeah even even didn't neil brennan say stopped i don't know man

i don't know i i can't stop thinking about the simple thing that it's not to go back to it of how people's experiences with people are so different with the ken boy thing because it is true it's like the stories you're telling me are brutal that's so fucked up yeah and in my head all i hear is what up man you like my little brother man yo this next comic coming to the stage man i swear he like my brother right here man right here hello he's the mint he the future eagle wit and i'm like jesus two completely different experiences yeah but they like later on they all they all made me feel special later on. They would say something.

They said something to the respect of a game-recognized game. Oh, that's nice. And it felt good. But Ken's a tough guy. Because I could be sometimes in a bad mood, and he just would fuck with you no matter what. But he was so charming. He truly could make me smile when I wanted to

fucking kill him and he would just still make me laugh despite myself charisma wise I'm talking like Eddie Murphy just bleeding charisma just astounding talent

I always think about him one of the most talented on a raw talent level. Just like charisma. Yeah. I remember Kenny Ortega, rest in peace. He was, at one point he was going through a phase. He was trying crowd work.

He would ask an audience member, if you had to fuck an animal, what kind of animal would it be? Oh my God, I remember this. Man, it was not good. That was my bit. That was my bit. And I was doing it for a while. And then he came in, and he riffed the thing off of it. And he was like, what is up with that?

And then he did it, and then he just started doing it. That's what I'm talking about. It's the only place I've ever seen where people just took your things. It was a bit I was doing. I was so mad. Can you imagine if he tried that with me? If Kenny Ortega waddled on the stage and he said, made it. So I went to college for musical theater.

No, I was so mad. That one was especially upsetting. There was a thing where I was talking to somebody and then I would do like a crazy monster voice back at him. And then I started noticing people doing that one. Here's the thing, it's weird it's like on one hand i thought this was gonna be like bashing mcdonald's no it's weirdly like a fun time in your life like it's like a good memory it's like something about mcdonald's was like good for you i think it's like going to rehab like you're you are uh like afterwards you're like sober. You know, like, my life's better now.

Sure, I personally can't connect to that metaphor, but if you say so, I believe you 100%. I believe you so much. Or prison. Is prison, does that work? It would be funny if you constantly were comparing things to rehab. It's like going to a methadone clinic. A lot of people there are pretty cool when they're not on heroin.

So let's go on to, this is our, let me just turn this down. This is our next segment. This has got to stop. This has got to stop. I feel like we can do this here. This doesn't have to be McDonald's specific. Things, just something that needs to stop at comedy clubs in general, or any comedy club.

And for me, I'll go first, is that, I may have said this on the show before, but so many comedy clubs I go to have pictures of mostly dead comedians on the walls. And not just dead comedians, but comedians who would have never performed at that particular club at any stage in their career. Like, what is Rodney Dangerfield doing

in an Oklahoma City loony bin? And that club closed, so it's okay. But it's also just like a weird... Great club, though weird it's just a weird vibe to walk in and be like oh they're dead they're dead you know no one wants to see robin williams hanging from a doorknob the second time round Woo! You just got a bit run on you. Yeah, yeah. But it's a weird, and if a couple comedy clubs did it, but so many are like, well, that's just what we're going to do.

As if you're going to look at it and be like, Rodney, let's see. It's just weird to me. I think take some risks with your decor. I mean, yeah, that's a good one. What's this got to stop? It's something like comedy club, a comedy club, someone. They got to stop giving me 1099s.

Remind me the difference. Just hand me cash. Stop making me pay taxes. Sure. I agree. I'm not getting paid enough. And that was the reason we did this back in the day. But now every comedy club is now...

Places that give you 20 bucks now are like, sign this piece of paper. So we actually gave you 14 bucks. Yeah, exactly. actually gave you 14 yeah exactly like it's like not only is it now i'm being paid minimum wage to do this job that i've spent most of my life working hard at now but now i have to pay taxes on this thing it's like you gotta pay me the amount without taxes yeah yo yeah i paid taxes yeah you know what i realized the moment you said i pay taxes, I was like, this is the most annoying thing I've ever said probably out loud. No, no, I think that's very true.

No, no, it's a good point. That's very true. What's something comedy clubs do that you're like, this has got to stop? I had one. I just had one and the taxes thing threw me. What was it? You think of page...

Oh, I know what it is um dropping checks on headliners figure out a way to not drop checks on headliners we are trying to work on an hour and you dropping checks in the middle of it hell fucks up the whole process it's like it's like we've already done check spots in our career we get why it's good if you need it you we don't need it we're clearly good enough comics that've already done check spots in our career. We get why it's good if you need it. We don't need it. We're clearly good enough comics that don't need check spots. Don't drop check.

Move it. Put it at the end of the show when the show's over. Make people stay. Or for God's sakes, do it slowly. Yeah. Do it slowly. Do two over here. Do three over here. Yeah, make it not noticeable.

Fucking, and for me, it's just the front row. It's just sometimes. And listen, I'm sure those servers aren't being paid enough. But sometimes they're in that front row. And I'm like, bro. I just think every club should just make people wait after the show for an extra 10 minutes and get their checks. I agree. One little server thing.

And again, I'm pro server. I don't think they get treated well, but sometimes servers, right as the host is about to bring you up, will be doing something in the middle of the pathway where you need to get to stage and you want to be like, dude, it's the one moment

we need this space. You know how this works. They say my name. And that also fucks up your set. If the crowd is waiting for you after your set dog like if the crowd is like waiting for you after your name's been said and they're like yeah also it just shows you that the waiter doesn't like you too yeah yeah right because it's like you think if uh chris rock was here you wouldn't just be oh my goodness you know like no they're just like i'm trying to get uh their waters for them yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Paige, you've been to enough comedy clubs. What do you hate about comedy clubs? What's something you, this has got to stop. As an audience member, it's when you go to a venue that doesn't have assigned seats, but there's somebody checking tickets at the door. And then like without asking you, they sit you in the front. Yeah. And that makes me really nervous.

I know people don't like it, but the problem is if it's not sold out. Without asking you, they sit you in the front. Yeah. That makes me really nervous. I know people don't like it, but the problem is if it's not sold out, no one would sit in the front. That's fair. I was at Good Nights, and I was trying to get photos for a specific pose for a flyer. But we hired a photographer, and then no one was in the front row. And there was enough people there, but no one was in the front row. And I was like, we can't take these pictures. We can't have empty chairs at the front of the show. But you guys make it scary to sit in the front row.

Listen, I know. I know. I know. It's a real conundrum. But I did a club recently where you could pick your seat in advance. And there were some seats where it was like three people at a four person table. And I'm like,

who's going to get that fourth? No, one's going to buy that ticket. Yeah. I won't go to this show then. Yeah. I don't want to be the one person at the table. Yeah.

I think nowadays, like I will, if somebody tries to do crowd work on me, I'll like give them like carrots to work with. But then if the comic doesn't do anything constructive with it, if they're just like, Oh cool. And then they like move on to something else i'm like like what was it for sure sure but you'll give them that's nice you to give them a carrot well because i know

like i know how it works i know what they're trying to do but when you have like people up in the front that just like do not want to interact like that's even worse yeah yeah yeah but so i don't know what do you think it's like would you rather have nobody sitting in the front or would you rather have like the worst person in the world sitting in the front i would like them to be a bouncer to kick that person out but that's not gonna happen like the person who like really wants to do crowd work is also bad yeah for me i mean the worst is people who lie. They want to like,

they're like, oh, say something crazy. They try to say something funny. They're like, they have their own jokes in their head set up. And also they can't improvise. So you ask them a second question, they're like,

oh, and you're like, they never play in that deep in. Yeah. They're just the gynecologist. That's all. Yeah, yeah, yeah. As far as I got.

A gynecologist with no weird stories. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's actually all been fine A guy called us with no weird stories. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's actually all been fine and normal. Yeah. All right, our final segment, which I think we can make McDonald's specific. You better count your blessing. You better count your blessing.

I think this is, I mean, we've kind of said some of this, but we can say maybe someone we're thankful for at that club or something we're thankful about it. I'll just do it again. I do think of Kenny Ortega from time to time. I went to his funeral. We did.

Yeah, yeah. It was in Harlem. And it was tough, man. He had this vision of what he thought was going to happen. And it was hard because everyone in this business, myself included, has visions of what we think are going to happen that sometimes they're accurate and sometimes you're like, I don't know. of what we think are going to happen that sometimes they're accurate, sometimes you're like, I don't know. And he was one of those, like he would say, like,

I could get in the cellar if that was the path I wanted to go down. And part of you wanted to be like, I don't think so. I don't think the thing you're working on here is going to get you past there. And it was tough. But he was a real comic. He cared. He had a car. It said Comedy was a real comic. He cared. He had a car. It said Comedy Ken on the front. He did real road gigs.

And ultimately, like, you know, it might not be the career that I would have wanted, but I think you do comedy long enough. You do respect the good comic who does the cruises. You do respect the good comic who does the cruises. You do respect the good comic who does colleges. They are, even if you don't know if it's the joke you really think is worth telling, they're making groups of strangers happy for a moment and giving them a good night.

And I think, like, this is why sometimes I hate, like, the vultures and the comedy critic and vulture, like, the magazine where it's like, they don't ever celebrate those comics. And they are doing great things. And they are bringing happiness. And, you know, some of them are hacky.

And some of them say some shit they probably shouldn't be. But ultimately, they're making a lot of people have a good night. And, you know, I respected Kenny. And I respected his work. So, yeah, that's my blessing. Damn, that shit Kenny. And I respected his work. So, yeah, that's my blessing. Damn, that shit got deep. That shit was beautiful.

And I said, it never worked on stage, but I said, when I met McDonald's, I did this Facebook the other day, and I said, when I met McDonald's, I know Kenny is in a better place. That's good. He's looking down at the audience. He's like, oh, I would be way better. He's going to Jesus like, what animal would you fuck? And then God's like, you know that was Lucas's thing, right?

Any blessing, any moment, any person any person of that place you know what they have paid my bills uh when i am not have not uh been able to pay my bills before yeah so hell yeah that's a good blessing it's a great blessing uh honestly i wouldn't be the comic i am today without that place i don't think any anybody any comic who's gone through mcdonald's would not be a stronger comic without it it truly makes you a stronger comic there's parts of your game that you just won't get in other places yeah so you know if you know i i think every little percentage of you is needed to do something great and stand up and have a great moment or have a great joke or have a great performance when you need it or an audition or something and it's like i'm sure there's a small percentage of

that that maybe not even that small that comes from mcdonald's yeah oh man uh page do you have a blessing i didn't work at McDonald's, but... That's a blessing in and of itself. It's a blessing. Ladies and gentlemen, this is the... Oh, let me just say real quick. If you dug this, I do feel like I want to do more McDonald's

and Beyond stories with comics, so let us know. Share it with your friends because I might have fucked up the video for part of it. So tell everyone. Again, join the Patreon, patreon.com slash downside and

i'm sorry for all the bleeps and uh and you know sound off in the comments which animal would you let us know lucas can build this into a full hour please and uh you know i don't want to fuck eagle. That's the end. And just remember, if you got a man, you got a woman, you got a significant other, let them know. They're the luckiest person in the goddamn world. This is The Downside. One, two, three. Downside. You're listening to The Downside. The Downside Downside

You're listening to The Downside The Downside with Gianmarco Ceresi