The Downside with Gianmarco Soresi - #208 Prosperity Gospel with Laci Mosley

Episode Date: May 28, 2024

Laci Mosley, the Scam Goddess herself, joins to discuss the downsides of falling for scams including classic NYC subway guilt trips, illegitimate apartment hunting fees, girlies scheming at 7/11, megachurches, and deadly helicopter tours. We also talk feet parties for far too long.  You can watch full video of this episode HERE! Join the Patreon free for 7 days for ad-free episodes, exclusive content, and MORE. Follow Laci on Instagram, Twitter, & TikTok Listen to Scam Goddess wherever you get your podcasts: https://www.earwolf.com/show/scam-goddess/ Get Laci's book, Scam Goddess: Lessons from a Life of Cons, Grifts, and Schemes here: https://www.hachettebookgroup.com/titles/laci-mosley/scam-goddess/9780762484652/ Follow The Downside with Gianmarco Soresi on Instagram Get tickets to our live podcast recording in NYC on June 3 https://www.showclix.com/event/the-downside-with-gianmarco-soresi-live Follow Gianmarco Soresi on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok, Facebook, & YouTube Subscribe to Gianmarco Soresi's email & texting lists Check out Gianmarco Soresi's bi-monthly show in NYC Get tickets to see Gianmarco Soresi in a city near you Watch Gianmarco Soresi's special "Shelf Life" on Amazon Follow Russell Daniels on Twitter & Instagram E-mail the show at [e-mail] Produced by Paige Asachika & Gianmarco Soresi Video edited by Dave Columbo Technical production by Chris Mueller Special Thanks Tovah Silbermann Original music by Douglas Goodhart Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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BetMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. Downside. You're listening to The Down with john marco serrazi welcome to the downside my name is jim marco serrazi we are here in los angeles at melrose podcast studios i'm here with my co-host russell daniels hi jim marco we're here for the Netflix is a Joke Festival. We are legally obligated to say this recording is not part of the Netflix is a Joke Festival. Are we? I don't know. Probably.

Okay. Oh, yeah. No, okay. We added a show today, something, and they said, just so you know, you cannot say this is part of the Netflix Joke Festival. Very strict rules. There's after parties at this thing where you have to, no plus ones. No bags.

Paige couldn't get in. No backpacks. It's all good. It's all good. I had to leave no plus ones. No bags. Paige couldn't get in. No backpacks. It's all good. I had to leave because I had a backpack. Oh, I brought it in. Yeah. Oh, I pushed that. I say, I gotta.

These are the Illuminati people now. Like, we just have to do what they say. We are here. That other wonderful voice. I didn't say that though, Netflix. I love you we love we love everyone every network

you're wholesome and beautiful oh my god we love all the networks all the networks oh my god Bob Iger my favorite

they're all consolidating and soon it'll just be one massive network run by President Trump. This is a show. He's going to live long. It's incredible. That man is never going to die. John, you got to

turn evil at a certain age so that you can sleep better. This empathy, this humanity shit is taking me down. I know for a fact it's a scam. If you evil, you just sleep real good you don't care about nobody that you hurt yeah i it doesn't even seem like he sleeps like four hours a day i don't know when he sleeps it's a no it's a medical marvel that he's he doesn't seem to get tired

and we was like oh great that was the That was the craziest. Because that was still during, we were all locked away. I just remember my sister, we were all texting. I was going on Twitter. Everyone was like, oh my God. Look, our president is sick. We don't like this man, but here he is. He survived it because he's evil. Like, I met these women in Miami that changed my life.

They were these two women in some mall that we were i think it was ball harvard and ball harvard was like the bougie mall at least at that time it was we was in line they came in front of us just walked in front of me and my mother and we're like we were here first honey and my mom was, we don't want to fuck with them. They give me mob energy. Let's just let them be here first. And they were 200 years old. They fully were not there first.

They were not there first. They just walked up in front of us and I was like, okay, well, y'all got it. I don't want to be murdered. My dad was a line cutter sometimes. I remember one time when I was a little kid, this was the moment I started seeing how full of shit he was. Someone cut us.

My dad was like, hey, hey, you can't cut. And then we cut. And I said to my dad, I said, dad, but now we're doing the bad thing. And he was like, yeah. We're special. Oh, oh, okay. That's who you are. And this will fuck me up for a while.

This is a show for those of you tuning in for the first time because you're so excited that we have Lacey Mosley on the podcast today I'm so happy to be here this is a show where we we

we we're allowed to complain we're allowed to say that that that you should be evil you don't need to pretend

like you should be nice just for a moment and you know Lacey of course from a scam goddess I I uh you know lacy of course from uh uh a scam goddess i i i asked you before if we could get into scams i know you talk about it all the time but we have some some

some scams of course and i feel like the downsides you like scams you admire them yeah they've become a part of my life so yeah do you remember uh uh how can you define it for us like what's a scam versus a lie so i had to do this with my book um and it was the hardest question that i had writing this book which is what do you define as a scam and what's not and it's complicated so the answer is that if someone walks away from a situation feeling like their needs were met and they feel good then it's not a scam because think about like okay let's i use relationships for this because it's pretty easy to explain like if you are a young hot bitch dating a nasty old person. Okay, my mom. Listen, I'm not ageist.

I'm going to get old. I'm going to be nasty. But it's, you know, so if you are and the old person is like, oh, this person loves me. Like, they're cool. They're taking care of me. They're kind. And on the back end, because you because you like oh you nasty and old but you a young hot bitch if you getting money or getting your rent paid it's like both people

are being reciprocated in the situation yes so that's not a scam because both people left with what they wanted i hear i hear that i bring up my mom at one point she did date a guy mom's very good looking lady pilates teacher and there's one time you're a very good looking man so that that makes sense that's very kind of you i appreciate that all right all right there was one time that she that i met a boyfriend it's not her current boyfriend who's phenomenal but i met this guy and i i almost started laughing it looked like a cartoon character if your mama got boyfriends right now, your mama a bad bitch. Why she got boyfriends right now?

I know she got to at least be 55. Yeah. She a bad bitch that no one can ever kill. I got the age wrong once in a podcast. We had to bleep it out because I was so scared. I said she was two years older than she was. And I was like, we got to bleep that. Is she a Leo?

I'm not a big astrology. Is Stephen Leo Gemini or Capricorn energy? Do you know when her birthday is? I think astrology is a scam. Right. We can go to that. Russell, do you not know? Russell, right?

Yeah, yeah. I was like, I'm pretty good with names. Yeah. Do you not know your mama's birthday? I do, but astrology for me. Yeah, but you can say maybe she knows the thing. I'm asking Russell if you just say when she was born. September 29th.

Okay, so she's a Taurus. Aries or Taurus? Taurus. Oh, 29th, Taurus. I'm a Taurus, so she's a Taurus. Oh, I love Tauruses. Oh, they're bad bitches. You can never kill them.

He hates astrology. He thinks astrology is a scam. The biggest scam of them all. The biggest scam of them all. Do you know why you said Leoo it's because he's a leo oh god damn it i hate astrology you know what i always remember i've dana donnelly had a tweet once and it said if astrology was based on what year you were born it wouldn't be a thing in los angeles and i'm like, exactly, exactly.

That's completely true. No, it's a cult I subscribe to. I'm like, yeah. What do you get out of it? It actually does help me deal with people. Sure. People's energies, like you're a Leo, I'm a Cancer. I work to support, see, that's why you you employ us you're on the ledger now

because you're like oh the girlies will come and they'll do their jobs and they'll be they'll like show up like i would just say that's classic sexism not anything to do with astrology at all no the girlies will show up and do their job i'ma push back because it's the difference between a girly showing up and doing their job and a girly showing up and performing yes and look at her look at this jacket are you serious guys watch the video just for the jacket i was like i gotta show up to be cut i gotta do something like we we gotta show up for the leo because we know the leo needs that yes okay so so let me go along with the the concept that some maybe astrology provides uh like your rock climbing it provides a couple grips so you

can figure out where you're going you know whatever these yes so you don't get caught up but what parts of the astrology the big astrology whether it be the apps or the psychics where do you draw the line between what is the scam and what should what is what is not good and what is by your definition not a scam because both both people's needs are getting met i think you take what you want and you leave what you don't and so that's where the scam starts and ends. Like, okay, if my astrology chart says today, you're going to fight with a lot of bitches who got water signs. I'm like, okay, do I feel like that's right? No. If I do, fine.

But it does actually really help with people's personalities. Yeah? Because you are a Leo. What does that mean for a Leo? What are the characteristics of that? Fire sign. Needs attention. No shade.

I'm a podcast host, of course. I'm going to walk you down. No shade. Needs attention. Caretaker. Very hyper. Oh, there you go. The moment it's nice, Russell goes, I don't know.

Not a nice thing. Hyper-vigilant, shiny, smart, quick-witted, but also vulnerable to people taking advantage of them because of the caretaker-ness. Whoa, wow. Oh, wow. Do you want me to put my Prada shoes on the table? Oh, yes.

Well, let's, I want to, I think the first time that I really felt I was scammed, very small one, it was in New York. It was like, I was in New York. I was alone. It was someone said I'm raising money for a basketball team. They had candy. I had, my dad had given me a hundred dollar bill the New York basketball team scam oh yeah this is early I was young this is not reason okay

listen I'm savvy when I see them cute little babies I'll be like okay well where the jersey at but honestly I always give them money because for me i don't care if they're lying like being a scammer is a profession yeah like every other profession it is a career path for a lot of people like you look at bernie madoff like he flew on the pj because charles Charles Ponzi started schemes. So then he got to fly because Ponzi walked. It's a whole lifetime career. And so if you're hustling door to door asking for money

and lying about it being the basketball team, I don't give a fuck. I don't mind rich people getting scammed ever. That's fine. They shouldn't be that rich to begin with. So I don't mind rich people getting scammed ever. That's fine. They shouldn't be that rich to begin with. So I don't mind those. But when I was this kid, it was outside of some Broadway show. And it was an older guy.

And I gave him $100. And he said he'd give me change. And I never got that change. Did he just run away? No, he just walked away. And I was too young. I just kept being like, um. And he's like, yeah, yeah, yeah.

And eventually I was just a little kid and I just was like, okay. And I left. That was my first real scam. Yeah. What was yours? New York. I was older. It was when I first moved to New York.

I couldn't find it. I wanted to find an apartment. And it was like one of those, like you, you could go in person to meet someone in Times Square and they were going to help you find an apartment and it was like one of those like you you could go in person to meet someone in times square and they were going to help you find an apartment but it wasn't like a real estate agent i don't know what it was but the first there was a lot they have a lot of fake real estate yeah there was a there was a thing they have apartment real estate agents that's a whole thing oh yeah oh yeah so this person though there was a lot of red flags that I ignored because I was desperate to find an apartment. So they buzzed me in.

It was like multiple buzzers. So you're in the building. And then he went up to a couple flights of stairs and then another buzzer. And then he answered the door with a baseball bat. Oh, my God. And I was like, oh, okay. And he was like, he put it down, though. Was it like battered up? No, no, okay. And he was like, he put it down though. Was it like battered up?

No, no, no. He just had it in his hand. And then like he put it down once he saw that I was a scared little boy. And then he, so he. Why do I like him? I like all the scammers I'm talking about. He was like, I might fuck y'all up. Like, I kind of love it.

And he's basically like, I'm going to help you get an apartment. I'm going to send you some listings as soon as today. And he goes, all it is is $100 for my thing. And I guarantee we'll find you an apartment. So I gave him $100. What? That's not a thing. Well, listen, I didn't know.

And that translated to once a week, this email that you can't trace. Russell, was that a thing? Once a week. this email that you can't trace. Russell, was that a thing? Once a week. Give me $100 and then I'll get you an apartment. He sent links to spam apartments that don't exist. You know what I mean? Yeah.

And then that was it. And then I put the pieces. Oh, people get mad that he takes $100 from them. They go to confront him and he has a baseball bat. That's what that is. Oh, my God. I'm obsessed with him. he has a baseball bat. Like, that's what that is. Oh, my God. I'm obsessed with him. That was the first time. Yeah, I mean, hey,

he's paying for rent in a midtown apartment somewhere. So he's doing it, you know? But it's so tough to find apartments in New York, so I totally understand falling for that scam. I once got sent to an apartment once

and I looked around twice. I said, oh, there's no bathroom in this apartment. And they said, oh, it's coming. It's coming. It's cozy. This is a cozy apartment. Like, do you love black people? You're going to have an outhouse

because that's how black people pee. Like, they be trying to, like, package it up in a cute way always. Like, oh, you don't have no windows because you don't need that light on you. I feel like New York, you have to, you learn about scams quick. You learn about, I mean, there's quick scams on the street. I mean, there's people, people ask for money in all sorts of different ways. And they got to get creative.

I know there's a guy if you walk back from the comedy cellar there's a guy who like he'll lay in the middle of the street and you go to help him and then he asks you for money or like he it's just like a little bit of a hook a little bit of a they got you and then you feel guilty and then you give money yeah and i think for your point it's changed the way I think about it with the scam where sometimes you go, well, you know what? It is a scam. This guy needs some help. This is what is – this is how he's making money.

I feel a little okay that I fell for the scam. I feel good. I feel like you should feel good. I walk into scams all the time. Like I am scam goddess. I know about scams. Sometimes I just go take a peek like the lady all the people in my life now are like you can't keep walking down these paths I'm like

I just like to see what's going on but I don't really think like if you're doing it as a profession I want you to just like live your life and do your job and do your employment if your employment is robbing people every day like it's still a job like think about how actors performers comedians us on this podcast like we're showing up and we're giving people our energy our life stories like whatever we have to reference that we can pull from we're giving it right yeah yeah that's what the scammer is doing on the train when they lying about the fact that they baby not in the hospital and ain't mama not sick or nothing but they're doing it all day so i'm like i don't know damn like sure the arts think about how long your day

would be if you just had to stay on the train like that's not even a good train with wi-fi none of the a's none of the blue lines let's talk about the g train which nobody knows where that fucking train actually goes right no no it goes to the green point where it pulls up it doesn't cover the full so you're standing here the train keeps going you're like well no no no you have to run half the the station to get there so think about just working the g train every day and being like, oh, my mom in the hospital and my baby's sick. Y'all got some money and having to keep up that level of energy of performance for every stranger you meet. Yeah. Yeah.

Absolutely. Like I got scammed yesterday. I get scammed constantly. What happened yesterday? What happened yesterday? Yesterday, I, oh God, I'm going to say, fine, say fine is that what we asked you to do the podcast no i'm gonna say the truth no i'm gonna say the truth fuck i'm gonna say the truth so at 6 a.m because like right now i'm really overworked and was just like i need a vape

i went to 7-eleven because all the vape stores were closed in la and i was like well i'm just gonna have to buy some cigarettes i guess oh no that's not even something i do and so i go in there and then these two lovely women like i didn't have my id with me like i was just like apple pay on my phone like fully living like a DeLulu, like, L.A. girl lifestyle. I pay them for this because they're like, you can't get this vape because you don't have your ID, but we can give you these cigarettes. Cool. So I pay them, and I send them, like, $500 each.

Because just thank you for your kindness. Oh, my God. Then one of them reached out to me and was like, well, we got a family member. We're trying to get into the country. Can you give us $10,000? And I was like, oh. $10,000.

Everything about this story is crazy. Yeah, wait. We just jumped from. The craziest part was the five hundred dollars that's very generous okay i'm gonna add to the crazy one of them was smarter than the other but not as shiny and she was the one who like the other girl i was like what's your apple pay and she was like oh i don't know what you mean and the other girl was like girl just give her your apple pay like shut your ass up like do it so i did it i paid her 500 first then i was like send me your friend's number and i paid her a thousand i'm a menace i'm an agent of chaos and but i think that they're really good friends because she told her friend to try to

run it up on me so wow ladies i'm glad you're doing so well in life because if I lost $1,500 yesterday, I would be chasing those two girls down right now and saying, This was an error. Please, please. I need to get my family member into the country. Please send it back to me immediately. Now, you grew up going to church. Yeah.

Is church a scam? It is, but also I love it. Yeah. Like, as scam goddess, like, my fan base is the congregation, capital C-O-N. I love church because, again, with scams, if you walk away from something feeling like, oh, I got something from that, it's not a scam. So a lot of churches are scams. They just want to, like, especially mega churches, ooh, ooh, real bad and nasty.

Like, Joel Osteen's bitch ass not opening up his church when the Houston floods happened. Yeah, crazy. And just being like, oh, no, girl, we can't do that. And I'm like, you work for Jesus. You're tax exempt. But at the same time, I can't attack them for being tax exempt because I'm like, at some point, I think I want to be tax exempt and have a church. There's some Instagram account. It shows pastors or whatnot of megachurches and just shows how much their shoes cost. And just sometimes, i don't get

i don't understand how people see it and go that's good i thought the line is what is it a through a needle's head a rich person getting it a camel through a needle's head that's a rich person getting into heaven it's saying like like you gotta be broke to get into heaven basically yeah it's easier it's easier to get a camel through a needle's head as a rich person getting into heaven. Wow. Meaning it's fucking impossible. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I get it now.

You want to break it down? Let me draw. Camels are big. Camels are big. The issue is prosperity gospel. Like, when you see your pastor having expensive shoes, an car a lot of people and it's honestly what's kept all of us in america down real bad is that we protect rich people because we want to pretend and think that one day we gonna have that wealth yes and it's like there's certain

situations where like if you're born into a certain situation if you're born on third base if you're born like in the stadium even, yeah, maybe you might get to that rich person position, but everybody else, I'm like, y'all niggas were born in the parking lot. Like you're not gonna get to the stadium. You're not gonna get to first or third base, but the idealism of richness and of prosperity

is something that everyone wants to protect because as a self-esteem mechanism, it's like maybe one day I'll have those things and I don't want someone to take those things from me. Even if these are imaginary things that I really am not going to get. That a lot of people don't want to do the work to be well or be better or make society better. It's a lot of work. Like, look at what's happening at the colleges like right now all the college girlies are protesting about palestine because they have free time as college girlies when i was a college girlie we was out there protesting too sure about whatever we could take care of but it was because we had bandwidth

and we had the time and the resources and that's why i think it's so insane when people go like these college kids what do you do and chill out i'm like well they have the space to do this stuff so that's why you they're the lifeblood of movement yeah they're the lifeblood and always have been and always have that's always been our job in that yeah like yeah point in our lives and so as an adult I'm starting to realize the kind of scam of all of it of like okay I get why my parents are more cynical I get why they like why people change as they grow and age because they experienced more life so I remember coming home and my parents had a Mike Bloomberg sign in a lawn and I was like the fuck i ripped

that shit out and was like what is this ghetto ass stop and frisk he was a stop and frisk i mean that was his that was his thing and they were like we're voting for the less evil white man we know we're not gonna win this but we just want to win a little bit like and i was like oh but i think the part that's missing is i think one of the reasons there is a slightly less evil person is because someone pushed back and made him this much less evil. And it was that movement that needed to push. Like I think

there's a cynicism getting older where they go like my mom, we were talking about she's like, it's not going to change anything or it's barely going to. And I'm like, well, that barely is still something. It's important. Yeah. If you don't have someone pushing these people, they won't be, they're lesser than evil gets like even farther to the, you know, a certain extreme. Yeah.

It's, it's all, but I don't understand though, when you get older, cause I am, cause we're, we're getting older. The thing of like, of, sorry to shock you, but like when you're at a certain age and you're like people that are in their 60s, 70s or so, and you're like, why are you still protecting these? You're getting to an age where you're not going to be suddenly rich. You're going to die at a certain point soon. Why are you protecting and so protective of these rich people who your whole entire lifetime

have fucked you over or not really cared about you? That doesn't make sense to me. it's because scam artists have them all. There's a thing of it's just like, if the institution is big enough, we go, well, that's scam. Well, the surcharge on the thing is that's just part of the thing. That's the scam. And the only people that you're arresting are the

ones who do it at the lower level and are not really hurting anybody and you're letting fucking Bloomberg get away with murder. And it's performative. When you're wrestling those people up, it's performative. Yes. When you're wrestling those people up, it is performative to be like, oh, we do do something,

but that's the thing, like, I can curse on this podcast. Yeah, oh yeah. Fuck yeah. Fuck yeah. So, James,

James Baldwin quote, Uh-huh. Everybody needs a nigga. And what that means is everyone needs someone that they feel like they can look down on. Like, whether it be, like, through piousness with religion of, like, I make better choices than you, even though everybody be sinning down bad. Or, like, money, I have more money than you. down bad or like money i have more money than you or like whatever it is in life that you can give yourself as a human being to have self-esteem that makes you feel like you're better than the

worst person the man laying in the street or whatever like that you don't have to beg for your money or you don't dance for your dinner like whatever it is everyone needs that and it is, everyone needs that. And it is one of the biggest scams that we have not been able to break free of in this country and everywhere. Because the truth is, if we invested in community and not this rugged individualism and not this bullshit where we're like, oh yeah, we all self-made, we all did this shit.

Like if we actually invested in being human beings and supporting one another, because nobody can do this by like if we actually invested in being human beings and supporting one another because nobody can do this by themselves we would be so much better off but rugged individualism is a huge scam and so is needing a nigga like needing someone to be lower than you and so we can't stop these people because they're like it's like that meme that's like oh watch out for that guy he just took your cookie and that guy in the middle is sitting there with hella cookies it's like watch out for your one cookie because he just took it from you yeah like we're stuck do you still do you do any

any like la church are there any churches here that you've been to? I cannot say the churches by name. Oh, yeah? But there are churches that I go to. Some of them, very scammy. Sometimes, like, the opening, like, I love Devotion. Devotion is where, for Baptist, I'm Baptist. It's, like, where they sing, and I'm a singer. Like, I love that moment in church. I love gospel songs. Yeah.

And gospel songs inform R&B. They inform a lot of music that's popular it's just good music who's who's the really famous he's he does gospel music but he's a son kirk franklin yeah i did i did a musical theater summer camp where they just gathered us all to do a gospel choir and it was it was rough it was rough but we sang all these Kirk Franklin songs and I just started he's on all my playlists now my mom sang for him

in the family really oh my mom was in Kirk Franklin in the family they're from Dallas I'm from Dallas

yeah did he get in a fight with his kid yeah that's been real messy and then he had to be like I love porn and we were like

we don't wait he had to wait why did he have to do that i guess people found out he loved porn and he had to be like he must really love it if people found out enough that he had to make a statement can you imagine loving porn that much you're like okay i guess i gotta go history get to the world oh that's crazy you want to be googling porn a lot for your google history to get to the world. Google got in a big... Speaking of scams, Google did... They're

incognito mode. They have incognito mode where you apparently like it doesn't keep track. Oh, I'm very familiar with incognito. Oh my god. And so Google, but you hear the lawsuit. You hear the lawsuit. They're like, well, we didn't say it was... It went away. And it was like, your logo is a detective going like this.

Yeah. Shut the fuck up. And they were like, yeah. All that for nothing? Wait, I have to Google. They got all the data. Years of, years of. Russell, do you want to make a statement about liking?

Well, okay. Russell officially likes porn. I have to Google, Google, Google's original statement for their company because when I tell you no evil do no evil. Google's original slogan. And at one point they literally removed it. They removed it as like their moniker of the other official website. They took it out right before they threw out those employees that were protesting them. But also like for drone.

Why are y'all projecting on us? Like, they're like, we evil as fuck. Y'all, uh, but we not evil. See, we saying do no evil, so we not evil. They're evil as hell. Yeah. I love, now people Google the downside, nothing will show up. There are no results.

I mean, they're trying to do that test in every facet. You know that's happening on Apple Podcasts too The Sephora Savings Event is here World in my hand I'll take this and that and that, ooh and this Oh it's true, find everything you want on sale at the Sephora Savings Event

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Only in theaters November 15th What scams make you mad? Because I see that you have the respect I understand There it is. Only in theaters November 15th. What scams make you mad? Because I see that you have the respect. I understand. They're fascinating. What makes you go, you know what? Fuck this person.

Put them in jail. Or they fucking call them out. Break apart this scam. What are the ones that make you mad? Scam up, don't scam down. So I really have never had a taste for like romance fraud, places and people where they're opened up to their vulnerabilities and they don't have the financial resources to recoup. And a lot of times with like financial scams with rich people, the reason they float is because rich people, everybody thinks this too. That if you are successful, you're automatically smart.

And yeah, that's true in certain facets, but no one is like that across the board. To put that in perspective, I love Beyonce. I be at all her concerts, but if i need open heart surgery i'm not gonna call beyonce yeah like but everybody's like oh you're successful at one thing so that means you're a genius and everything it's like the stock market thing you're like it's just a really boring fucking thing that you go into and that is a scam that we for some reason we rely so heavily on doesn't make any sense doesn't really impact well we tried to make crypto as millennials. It did not work out for us.

No, I know, but there's that thing where you're like, they're viewed as like, well, and I'm like, no, they just went to school for four years, learned how to do that scam, and then do it, and it's boring, so a lot of people don't want to do it, but then they just take the money. They just take the money. You're absolutely right, Russell.

And it's also like a metaphor here. If someone's really good at hacky sack, we're not going to be like, they're a genius who needs to control and manipulate all of our media, and they're a thought leader. We would never think that, right? No. But that's what making money is, is some people just get lucky, and they make a lot of money.

Some people start on third base in the stadium and make a lot of money some people start on third base in the stadium and make a lot of money it doesn't mean that they're a genius no and we're really bad at keeping track of people's record like if you look at any like an elon musk type and you look at all the things he said you'd be like oh he's batting average there needs to be like a batting average he's never been ain't never been good at shit. Nothing. Nothing. He literally has never been good at nothing. And I don't know. I mean, look, your boyfriend picked us up in a Tesla

the other day. And yeah, that door is cool. He didn't make the door. He said, could you do a door like a cool movie? And the tech people are like, oh my God. We don't get emails constantly and text messages that are like, hey, girl, we got a factory recall. Your car might blow up on Tuesday.

Of course, we've been having a little blow up situation. Don't worry about it for real. But your car might blow up. Like, if that's happening with your business constantly. How's that brain chip going to go? The gas pedal didn't work. And the brain chip's going to go well? Are you crazy?

I don't like that brain chip thing. Do not like it. This is now well they're a new sponsor we're both gonna get one testa told the girls your cargo blow up he took over twitter and was like no more bots and now all we get is pussy and bio on every tweet that we post like the other day i got one because i think it blocks people who say pussy and bio so now they had like umlaus and whatever it's like pussy in bio and you're like that's that's all it took to overcome whatever system you made it is it is twitter it's just one of those things where i'm like i twitter i don't understand cars

i don't understand rockets i'm fully titanic mode i'm fully titanic mode i'm playing my violin as the ship goes down on twitter i'm not leaving i'm just gonna be there like let's play some catchy imagine titanic as the quartet's playing someone comes I'm not leaving. I'm just going to be there like, let's play some catchy tunes. Can you imagine Titanic as the quartet's playing? Someone comes up and goes, you want to see my pussy? Pussy and bio. There's literally someone drowning saying pussy and bio. Paige, you had a scam.

Yes. Mine was also a New York scam. New York, baby. No, it was before I moved there. But Max and I, my boyfriend and I, we went to New York for our... Okay, you got a man. With a Tesla. He also, I think, is on the wait list for a Cybertruck.

You made me know the clothing brand. What's it called again? Basket Case. Basket Case. I don't think it's super well known outside of smaller circles. We're going to have your boyfriend. He's going to China. Yeah. have your boyfriend he's going to china yeah oh my god go to factory shopping yeah wow it's crazy um but anyways my scam was uh we went to new york for anniversary several years ago and i think like a week before um we got there the there was a helicopter crash in the hudson and

like everybody in the helicopter died except for the pilot that's why i won't take a helicopter crash in the Hudson and everybody in the helicopter died except for the pilot. That's why I won't take a helicopter. Because in a plane, the reason we're hearing about Boeing and the doors flying off and shit and being like the wheel fell off or the door fell off, whatever, because a plane can still land. A helicopter, if something goes wrong, it's over.

So the pilot was able to get out because he or he or she knew how to like unlock the the seat belt um but the passengers couldn't like get out of the car it was just like i y'all to be fair i think they were sinking in the hudson so y'all don't know how to get free all right i gotta go good luck so and it was a it was a helicopter tour company so this is like for people who want to go like fly yes like people who want to go fly around new york city to see the city from like i remember this yeah yeah and so this company then was under investigation by the faAA for the crash and killing like five or six people. And the pilot being like, gooses.

Exactly. Exactly. Y'all be safe. But before this crash happened, I had booked a tour with this helicopter company. And I was going to surprise Max with this cool tour. He had lived in New York. You were going to surprise him with his death? Yes, exactly.

He was surprised, honey, we're dying today. By the way, what's the seatbelt situation? surprise him with his death? Yes, exactly. Surprise, honey. We're dying today. By the way, what's the seatbelt situation? Is it a guy you look down and you're like, there's three locks. It's an escape room around my waist. Seatbelts on planes are a scam. Like, bro, are we being serious? Like, is the seatbelt going to save us?

It'd be funny if it's really simple and the pilot's like, they couldn't figure it out. It's just click. I think there is something that goes over your chest and then another one that goes over your waist. Yeah, but if the shit go kaboom and go be, it don't matter if you got a seatbelt on.

Exactly, yeah. But we all just do it to feel better. I'm like, yeah, I'll put on my seatbelt on the plane. So this tour that I booked was a doors open tour.

What does that mean? Oh my God. So, you know, a helicopter usually has all the doors on right and then you're looking out through a window but if you wanted to take pictures my planes don't have doors no more what's going on exactly this is a feature now sometimes you pay more for that doors you pay more okay yeah so no doors on the plane right and then um so because i was gonna

surprise max like there was the doors off tour i paid more for that tour versus the one with the doors on so that you could take pictures without like a windows glare. You can't pay more for less helicopters. It was fancier to have no doors. Yeah, exactly. Windows pay more. You won't have windows. Okay, cool. Yes.

So after this crash happened, like, well, I have to tell him about it now. Like, I can't, like, make him go to this thing without disclosing. Like, people, some people just died on this. Like, it's up to you if you want to go or not. Like, I'll try to, I'll cancel it. We can go on the doors. No doors, no seat. We just won't wear a seatbelt and we'll be fine. There's part of me, though, that thinks, though, that you're like, it just happened.

What are the chances it's going to happen again this week? Do you know what I mean? Sure. Like, for the company. Sure. Yeah. But it was, like, within a week window of it happening. So it was scary.

You know, it was a choice to, like. It's like you're gloating. You're like the day after 9-11. The day after 9-11, you're like, I'm going to fly right now. I'll fly, yeah. There's no way. There's no way. So then Max was like, he ended up wanting to do it.

He's like, I guess we might as well. And so because I had, okay, so when this helicopter company was under investigation by the FAA, they were not allowed to do the doors off flights anymore because that's the one that ended up in the river. That was their correction? Yeah. We'll put the doors back on for safety reasons yes exactly so then uh so then we basically got downgraded to the doors on flight and i had asked the company if i could get refunded the difference of the price because i paid about like 200 more for um this doors off flight versus the flight that had the doors on they told me no we're not able to

give like a refund for the difference price so then i was so upset about that because i think i was i don't know i was making like barely more than minimum wage at the time yeah and like a couple hundred dollars for me at the beginning i was said said fucker, but not a pay-per-bidder. Where were you working? I was working for different comedians at an agency that didn't pay me well. Or on time. And you know what's crazy about that, too? That's a huge scam. When you start working in this industry, everybody tries to treat you like you're crazy and gaslight you for wanting your money.

They'd be like, oh my God, you need to get paid before net 45 or net 90? That's crazy. Are you not managing your money they'd be like oh my god you need to get paid in before net 45 or the 90 that's crazy are you not managing your money why are you so poor it's yeah you showed up on time to do your job because that's what we required of you but why do you need your money like oh my god yeah no i would we would wait outside of um our boss's office on like friday nights just because he would be hiding in there not giving us our paychecks oh my god and we wouldn't leave until we had paychecks in hand but sometimes actually I am waiting on a paycheck from John Marco but that's that's on his business manager that's on the business manager was standing outside of your boss's office like we ain't

gonna jump you we ain't gonna jump you we just need our chase we would not you should have given the helicopter ride to him okay yes backtracking to the helicopter story so um they wouldn't give me a refund in the difference of price and it was just like we didn't find that out until we actually got to the the helicopter flight area like somewhere in in jersey and we since we had ubered all the way from manhattan to like uh i don't know hoboken or something like it was an expensive uber and by the time we got there and found out that i wasn't getting the refund i was like well we're already here we might as well just do the flight so i did it anyways and then after that i think somehow i found a tweet that also had the same complaint.

And then I replied to it and I said, oh, yeah, they're scamming me too. Like, you know, the same thing happened to me. And then somebody from like the New York Post, I know, super legit news publication. They reached out to me and like got, you know, asked me some questions about like what had happened. to me and like got you know asked me some questions about like what had happened and they ended up using some quotes for me like in this article kind of like detailing like what happened with the accident the week prior and the ongoing investigation as well as like including people like taking flights uh since then and so because they were like, the accident happened, and then these people were really enthusiastic about going on the exact plane that the accident happened on.

Exactly. Titanic submersible. Yes. It's like some kind of vibes. A lot of Titanic companies went under because of that. They like little like submersibles. They just went like a little bit 10 feet under the bar, but no one wanted to do that shit anymore.

Yeah, it's like 13,000 cubic feet feet or something but that whole thing was a scam i talked about ocean gate yeah because the scam was is that the guy who was leading that whole program yeah oh fuck it was his name richard something um it'll come to me but he was doing that those like excursions yeah so that he could show oil and gas companies and other companies that he had a reliable way that was cheaper to explore the ocean floor so the whole reason he was taking those rich people down there for 250k each trip was because he was trying to show that his vehicle worked and it was ghetto as fuck with the with the playstation controller and it was a tin can it couldn't sustain like like the pressure of the ocean and it did a couple times but then he didn't like refurbish it or try

to like tune it up or nothing so it just like every time it went down it got weaker and weaker because you know it was it was cheaper to do the doors the no doors submarine yeah and i think that's what ultimately did it yes but yes so he was taking them people down there as test dummies and they didn't know it they just thought they were doing rich people tourism and he was like you're my test dummies it was a scam so did you get your money back so yes then, then NBC, New York, like the local NBC, they also reached out to me and then like did an interview. And then I guess whatever this flight company caught wind of it. And then they ended up refunding me the difference.

So, but it was all after the fact. I'm like, I'm not retracting any of my statements that are to me. Like you did scam a lot of people out of their hard-earned money. And it was kind of just like, okay, well, I guess it was resolved in the end. So I don't know if you would classify that as a scam at the end of the day. You wasted your time.

You wasted your time. That's a scam. And time is money. We don't know how long we're going to be alive. You were trying to fly around with no doors on. They ran an unsuccessful scam. You're like, look, mom, no doors. And they took that from you.

Yeah. Real quick before I move on, I should say today's episode is brought to you by New York City Helicopter Tours. Enter code DOWNSIDE for a special discount on the bladeless helicopter ride. You just sit there. It's very safe. You were in New York for what, two years? Yeah. And you worked at a place that I've done stand-up comedy. I think it's very safe you you were in new york for what two years yeah and you i i you worked at a

place that i've done stand-up comedy i think it's closed now the karma lounge one of the one of one of the places that somehow like it opened earlier during covet that's how you knew it was a real it was it was a rough place it was it was a hookah bar yeah i haven't been to hookah bar a long time in high school that was really cool that first hookah bar i Yep. I haven't been to a hookah bar in a long time. In high school, that was really cool, that first hookah bar. I remember the first time a girl said, taught me what shotgunning was. And it's where you almost kiss and they blow the smoke in your mouth. And I was like, this is the sexiest thing. You're the cutest.

And then I got a headache immediately after. I was like, I have a headache. I need to go. I loved the two times I've been to a hookah bar. Also, when Hillary Clinton was running something at that point, I need to go. I loved the two times I've been to a hookah bar. Also, when Hillary Clinton was running something at that point, was she the mayor in New York? No, she was a senator.

Whoever she was. Something. Senator. She was a senator lady. At that point, one of her big senator lady things was no one can smoke inside. And Karma Lounge was one of the places that got like an exemption from that because they were like this will destroy our business if people can't smoke indoors and I literally have a burn this is a burn from karma lounge there was a person came in and they burnt me with a

cigarette and not like they didn't mean to. It was like flagrant flying hands. And I was like fully in coyote, like ugly mode when I worked there. So I was just like, kick him out. And he was like, I'll do anything. And I was like, open your wallet. And so he opened his wallet, and I just took all the cash he had out. And I was like, you can stay.

I'll do anything. That's amazing. I didn't know you could do that. Next time. I also worked the feet parties there. You know, sometimes it was comedy. That's why I started doing stand-up was Karma Lounge. Karma Lounge is rough.

What is feet party? I met Naomi at Paragon. Oh, yeah. Who created the term black dress. Sure, sure. I met her there, but I started doing stand-up because I saw her doing stand-up, and I was, like, working those stand-up parties. But the feet parties, oh, they tipped really well, and they were the nicest people.

The ladies of the feet, very kind. So what's happening at a feet party? So at a feet party at Karma. Okay, so you remember how, like, when you go downstairs, there's like a bar there and it's like really sticky floors and very like nasty. Okay, they would set up these partitions. Like, drive her up to the partition, please. Like these partitions where the ladies of the feed feet like they would mostly be open and communicable with everybody but if you paid extra you could have a private foot moment behind the partition

and how how is this like a bathroom stall can you see a little or is it like you feel at the bottom you can definitely that's the whole, you're just looking at feet or what? We're kissing them. What are we doing? I think, I don't know what they. We're worshiping. I'm not a foot person. No, me either.

That's why I'm asking what's happening. So I don't know if you stick your penis between the feet or what you do. That's a possibility? Yeah. I was just marching and getting my tips. And I was like, if they, if they toast sex and I guess that's what they do. And it's not. And I was like, if they toe sexing, I guess that's what they're doing. It's not sexing. And that feels like...

They might even have been toeing a course, toe to course. I don't know. I don't think there's a lot to do. That's not going to work. No. I think if that worked,

you'd hear about it more. You're trying out more. Yeah. Wait, what do you mean you'd hear about it more? I just mean like, like, you know, as you were growing

and hooking up with people, you'd be like, hey, let's try the toe thing. Gian, think about your big toe and your pointed toe and how tight that space is in between. That might be a space

that people will stick things in. Sure, but only those two. there's no way between the last two first time being like i don't think it's gonna fit just so you can say the phrase i don't think it's gonna fit babe i don't think it's gonna fit my toes are so tight between the middle one yeah i have the tightest toe holes so but how many people would go to a foot party? There would probably be like 70 people there. Oh, my God. And how many equal men, equal women? I thought that was a low number.

We only need one woman for every two guys. That's so true. No, all the ladies of the feet were all ladies. Oh. There were no men of the feet. It was all ladies of the feet. Is this a group? I don't know.

I just started calling them that they were very nice and so you're walking around okay when they're not in the partition are the women just sitting in a chair feet out and everyone's talking no it was like they were moving around it was either they were in they mostly were in the partitions but if they weren't in the partitions they might be getting a drink from me or tipping me or something, but then they'd just be walking around with the feet. Like, it wasn't, it was very fast moving.

Did they ever go to you and they say, hey, what kind of feet you packing? No, I mean, there was a lady once at a bar that I worked at in Pittsburgh when I was in college who was like, you know, you could just come next door and rub some oil on your titties and you could just work over here.

And I was like, I don't care. I've done a job for you. You know, you could just... That is such a funny offer. You could just rub some oil on your titties. Sex work is work. I'm not strong enough for that. But I respect the work.

So I was like, sis, I can't't do that but thank you for the opportunity thank you for thinking of me thank you for thinking i'm special enough to do it because that's kind of the worst thing i was talking to my friends today about this i was like if i started putting my titties online or like my body online like naked and people didn't like click on it or like it or invest I would feel really bad and I feel like the girlies be on Twitter and stuff and they'd be like hey go to my my nudie page and I'm like to have to advertise your nudie page feels just really debasing. I'm feeling very stressed about this. I made some promo for a comedy show.

And basically, it was off a TikTok joke where it was like a woman was holding up a ruler and was like, if you're not bigger than this, I better not hear you be raising your voice. And then, like, it was just a thing people were doing, a TikTok trend. And so then it would cut to, like, a guy. And and you couldn't hear him talking but he was mouthing the joke being he's got a small dick and i was like okay here's my promo for pittsburgh and all the comments all the comments were like the fact that he's making this joke that's how you know he's got a big hog this dude's got a this the fact he's this joke, that means he's got a real big dick. And I'm like, whoa, that's not,

I wasn't trying to put that rumor out there by making this joke. But all the comments, it's so funny that that's what they took from it. They're like, he's joking about this. That means this guy's got a big old dick. You do kind of have that energy.

You do kind of have that energy. They might not be wrong. I don't think they're wrong. Add that to the Leo like seemed like big dick energy but you know talk to him for a little speaking of scams

talk to him alright let's let's let's let's go on to our we can take it slower

this has got to stop we normally have music but today we don't this has got to stop this is a place we talk about things that need to stop big small personal broad i'll start great i got a thing right now and this has to do with all the all the college protests and whatnot there's this degree where they go hey kids these kids trust in social media trust in social media as if any of the other news sources aren't aren't funded by by the ad

agencies corrupted in some way corrupted the fact that americans i just remember the way like america would talk about uh uh north korea and they're like oh my god the propaganda they're fed every day rise for the national anthem everybody we'll talk'll talk about North Korea after this and wearing the flag. And I don't know if it's just always been this bad. But they say, well, don't listen to TikTok. I'm like, that's the same. Don't listen to television. Don't listen to paper. Anything can be a lie.

Anything can be a truth. Ultimately, the thing that social media does have is someone can directly upload a video that's right in fucking front of them. And you go, oh, shit, that's really bad. The thing that is out there that they're not showing on network TV because there's a lot of rules with network TV. They're not going to show a lot of the horrors of the world. The way that older people dismiss social media in broad strokes while watching Morning Joe is insane.

And it looks so foolish. It looks so like you're like, do you not know that we can see the hypocrisy happening? You're asking me not to look at this video of a dead kid. And then you're giving literally giving like the IDF's talking points in another from a newscaster of course on cnn so you're like guys the jig is up also like bro with twitter like when i was a child when 9-11 happened and we didn't really know what was going on for real we just knew bush was somebody that people wanted to have a beer with i'm from texas yeah we're very weird i said two pledges every single day we said the pledge of allegiance to the american flag and then after that we would be like honor the texas flag i pledge allegiance to the texas one and indivisible every day oh was it the exact same exact same thing we

just put texas in. It's not that creative. Can you do the anthem? What anthem? I pledge allegiance to the flag. Yeah. Okay. But you're exactly right about like everything. Like I feel like older people are trying to be like, oh, well, y'all's media isn't good

and it's not whatever. But it's like we know when a media company is bought by a company and they are not gonna cover certain news and now we're seeing that on Twitter we're seeing that because media has been democratized so now people can share what they're going through and it goes viral and we see it and we would not have seen it before yeah so all the strategies that they've tried to put in place that used to work like when we were kids when 9-11 happened they don't work anymore because somebody's like hey girl insurgents are

people hey girl uh they murdering kids and we just thought it was insurgents like the cat william jokes he was like oh they murdered all that men's job he was like i don't know no insurgents i hate insurgents like we just but that's what we, we just... But that's what... We know as people. Pardon me. I just want the older people to... Again, because I'm just a little kid. These old people. What I want them to just admit is they go,

I'm mad, I don't know, being them. I'm mad that you're showing me the horrors that I think are necessary to maintain everything that I enjoy about my life. Instead of saying you're wrong or you're delusional or you don't understand, I want them to admit like, you're right. I just like to be like, I know it's tough over there.

I know it's horrible. And I don't want to think past that. And you're forcing me to actually put visuals to that and think, and I don't want to think. And I don't want to. As opposed to going, you're forcing me to actually put visuals to that and think and i don't want to want as opposed to going you're being brainwashed by what a video of a little girl with her arm blown off yeah fuck you yeah you have you have to take it in i'm sorry that you got used to a world where you never had to take it in yeah where all you had to do was look at a wide shot of a building and went yeah it's it's not good.

It's just crazy over there. We got it. That's as far as I have to think about it. Yeah. But here's the thing about the images. They actually don't help. Like, I have seen so many black folks gunned down in the streets. I have family members who have been gunned down.

It doesn't make it more real for those people. It actually desensitizes them. So showing these images, it's like everything is going to work for who it works on because they already want to take in the information and they want to do it. The other people, it actually desensitizes them the more that they see it. They don't believe information and they want to do it the other people it actually desensitizes them the more that they see it they don't believe it and they don't care can it ever god i forget his name um a a young a young boy where his mom decided to show aubry um further back trayvon further Further. Jesus Christ.

Let's go alphabetically. Emile Emmett Till. Emmett Till. Yes. Where like the decision to like show. And I mean these days if you're online some places you're so inundated with so many pictures. But it felt like at the time that wasn't. And they put it in newspapers.

And it fucking shocked some people. So sometimes there's. I agree that there's some people that are never going to be moved by anything. Well, it's like Mississippi Burning. That's why I love that movie so much is there's a moment where Matthew McConaughey is doing his speech in the courtroom and describing the horrific things that happened to this black girl before she was unalive. And at the end, he goes to this jury of your peers, which is black folks go to jury duty because they don't be our peers. But at the end, he goes, imagine if she was white.

And that's what changed everything. So that's why just I sometimes I think images, but you've got to be strategic about in the sense that you can easily become numb to it. There's some there was a picture of like a a little boy who was dead on a beach because they were trying to get into America. That image was very powerful for some people. And I just feel like especially right now, I see older people talk about it. I'm like, have you even seen a fucking... I think it's over.

I don't think that... That's kind of a scam to me. I don't think that that's kind of a scam to me. Like, I don't think that the images hold any power. Like, the people who get it are going to be traumatized by it. The people who don't get it and are desensitized are going to continue to be desensitized. So I don't think showing, like, I don't, like, when it comes to Palestine, when it comes to everything, like, I don't repost images. I repost information and that's it. Where we can reach people, where we can send aid, where we can do help, like, that's it.

Because the violent images of these people being dead just as a black person, I know, like, a lot of people don't look at us as people like honestly it's a joke of mine i'm like y'all y'all thought we were your employees forever okay so we look like property to y'all like we don't look like people it's the same thing with them so yeah i think there is like sometimes you're like that's the shocking thing though is you're like you see things and you're like how is this not like how is in the first month when the kids had a press conference those kids and you're like good fucking god like and how did that not just stop everything why do we have babies begging for their lives but at the same time like i feel like in america when sandy hook happened yeah we kind of realized like we were fucked someone said though there was someone involved in Santa Hook who said

who saw the pictures I think because they were they did the autopsy or whatever and they said in their mind they said if these pictures were shown it would change legislation I'm sure you know that's idealistic but there's sometimes

brief moments in the country where you can push someone emotionally so much that maybe you can make a little bit of a change. But per your point, certainly with this, it's been going on for so long that people have like – you lose the emotional moment of mass movement. And it's so hard. It's like, well, how do you find it again? Yeah. And it's so hard. It's like, well, how do you find it again? Yeah.

I mean, it felt like, I felt like with George Floyd, there was a degree. It was like this video fucking like got people a little bit movement and then fucking it dissipated. It fucking dissipates. Do you know what we had to deal with after that? Yeah. Like, I, because I have very wise parents, I got very lucky. Like, people don't talk about the privilege of having good parents. Like, I have very good parents who taught me a lot. When the George Floyd stuff happened, I was like, oh, as a black person, I'm going to have to just run it up like supermarket sweep right now.

Like, I'm getting the cheeses. I'm getting the dog food. I'm getting the most expensive items because there is going to be a pushback and a turn after this like they always flip on us when we make any progress so i was like i'm gonna grab everything i can and i know that y'all gonna flip on me and then i'll go back to being the safe nice black lady who's very safe and nice like and i've done that that's it's happening but to your point like and i've done that that's it's happening but to your point about sandy hook i think what i was trying to say is that when we let them kids die and we didn't do nothing about it and not that we didn't but like that our country hasn't done nothing about it

that was when we all kind of knew like oh oh, we're fucked. And late stage capitalism is just eating us all alive. And it's going to continue to converge on us until we decide as a people to have community again. Like we have to let go of the self-made shit. We have to let go of the like I'm in control of my own life. And it's just not how it works. None of us would be alive if someone didn't help us from the moment we were born. Yeah. I ain't walk out the coochie with my business suit and my briefcase like,

who's paying for this insurance? Y'all got hip. I just met the doctor saying, oh, it's the briefcase. I can see the briefcase is coming. Pull yourself up from your bootstrap. It was just the briefcase coming out first. Brown mother briefcase i can see the briefcase is coming pull yourself up from your bootstrap it was just a briefcase coming out first brown mother briefcase hello it's a businessman or a woman we'll see i was like i had nine months of free rent uh i might want to go back do you have this gotta stop um yeah quick one um this has got to stop so uh i was doing a show and been doing for a

while a long time and and you, some downside listeners have come. Some other fans of the show come a lot. Titanic. And. Yeah. Did you see Titanic? Yes. Okay.

Well, I don't know if I was in it. I was there and then I left and then I came back recently. In New York? Yeah. Yeah. Rose's mom. He played Rose's mom. Yeah.

He maybe would have remembered. I was there when you were a while ago yeah yeah yeah that's how i know i was there okay holy shit because you were there before the other lady took over for the other lady right yes yes oh i saw you oh my god i saw you you were phenomenal oh thank you could you start wearing the blouse to the podcast just so people can figure this out sooner um so that pink dress, like the top and the bottom. You are, Russell, I'm sorry, I'm going to pause to give you your flowers for a moment. Thank you.

Because when I tell you that show gagged me so hard down there. It's a very fun show. It was so fun. When the fucking Fisher-Price car came out, there was just so much. fucking Fisher-Price car came out. There was just so much. But your moments with Celine were my

favorite moments in that show. I know I kept looking at you and I was trying to figure out why I was staring at you so hard. But live theater is a... So tell me what you hate about people who come and see you in this show. Amazing things come. But there's something and I think people think it's a compliment and and it's not not a compliment

but it's when you hear it as a person and it's a thing you over and over again you're like it's not really okay so sometimes people will see the show and there'll be a fat person like me and they'll come up to me and one of the first things they say right after you've done a show is be like it's just nice to see a fat person on stage and you're like and they're saying it as a fat person so it's like it's not them it's not it's not it's not a skinny person they want to feel seen they want to feel seen yeah but you're like you're like that i'm never on stage being like i'm doing this for the fats i'm i'm like i am you're coming at your point in the audience there's a thing where you're like i identify as fat yes of course but you're like that's not um

it's certainly a part of the conversation i could have with them but it's not the first thing i want to hear when i got done doing a show i love if you have a specific thing or specific that's great but just being being i just had a great show Feel good about it and you're like and also hey you're fat And you're like yeah When you're probably like I love your Big choices We're on the same page

I'm not shamed by that but It's just not what you want to hear first We're on the exact same page We can have a conversation and be like That was great I just need maybe one or two more compliments and then we can get into it. I've gone into press and exactly what you're saying happens to me in a different way. Where it's like, I got to the end of a press run with iCarly where I just got fatigued. Like, you're going to get the same questions.

Like, most research journalism, like people don't do their research. Fine. But she had asked me like, what is it like to be gay and to be black and to have this job? And I flipped, I apologize to my publicist because I was on the phone and I was like, what do you want me to say?

That, that every time I signed a W2, I think about Harriet Tubman. Like, you want me to say that that every time i sign a w-2 i think about harriet tubman like like if sydney sweeney is who you were interviewing would you be like oh like big titty white bitches do they see you more because why you shouldn't be in an interview white bitch like do all the big titty white bitches walk up to you like wow we feel seen no you wouldn't do that yeah and it's like them coming up to you and like i immediately when you you gagged me you just gagged me but like knowing you were in that show and i and i remember you i know i know i saw you yeah and i was talking about your

performance because you were fucking funny as fuck and so quick you have a beautiful voice like wow thank you i was gagged i i appreciate and also i want to say that the people saying anything they are genuinely moved and it does mean something to them it's just a funny thing where you're like it's just it's not what i want to hear but anyways but also they need to be a bit more aware it's your kind person for like allowing the space i do that too yeah it's like i know that this person is coming from this place so i'm gonna let them cook with what they're going because everything ain't about you my mom also taught me that like everything and they're trying to connect yeah they're trying

to connect but at the same time it's still not the thing to say yeah as soon as you said titanic i was like immediately was like your performance these things that i loved not like wow you're so brave for being being alive just being myself wow what a revolution that you're just being alive when everybody doesn't want you to like what the fuck is wrong with people well i appreciate your kind words yeah uh page two of this gotta stop a quick one i think this has got to stop um corporate branded gifts um okay i think like when a company gives you a gift and it has the logo slapped on it and it's really ugly like i feel bad throwing it away like i don't want to throw stuff away like it's gonna go in the trash i'm not gonna use it um but so let's say like they give you like a branded like water bottle or something

that has their name plastered over it and it's really ugly it's like nobody else is going to use this so it's either i it stays at home strictly or it's going in the trash but then i'd rather not have the gift at all so it doesn't end up in the trash. Like I'm fine using my normal whatever I have. You know, I didn't need this other thing. Yeah. I appreciate the sentiment. And this goes to agree, if it's ugly too, you're like,

so you want me to advertise for you with this ugly thing? Yes. And it's huge. And you're like, you shipped it and it's big. Yeah, yeah. And it's, did you think of that

just because I'm wearing my Netflix is a joke shirt or did you have that before we came in today? I agree. No, artist on your top is very cunt. Wow. Wow. You know what I want? Give me a pen.

That I can use. Give me a pen. Something practical. That doesn't leak. If it leaks, I'm associating it with you forever. But give me a good pen. That's all I need in life is pens. You ever not find a pen in your whole house and you're like what's happening with my life

i don't have a pen i have a pen drawer okay all right he flexed on you that was a really he was like i have a pen drawer what are you doing with your life you don't have a pen drawer lacy do you have a this has got to stop i feel like I kind of just participated in all of y'all's this has got to stops. So I feel like I need to stop talking. Okay. Good. That was going to be my second, but we have to go on. Our final blessing.

We had a good negative episode. We got into the weeds. Oh, I had a blessing. I forgot. I got one. You go first. But my blessing today was I had Rosa, my Uber driver. I don't always love talking, but Rosa and I, we just had a quick, fun connection.

And I had a 25-minute ride here. And it was delightful. I mean, it was like, I was like, what are you doing this weekend, Rosa? I mean, it was like, we talked about a lot. And I just, you know, when you're like, meet someone and you're not expecting to have a fun connection and I just really appreciated Rosa on the way over here. It was really lovely.

Normally, his This Has Got to Stop's are about other Uber drivers that he would shut. No, I even put my headphones on and Rosa cut through and I was like, okay. And then I, for the first minute or two, I was like, am I going to do this? And then I was charmed.

And I took them right off. And I leaned in. And it was nice. So, Rosa, this one's for you. Rosa. My blessing, I had a stand-up show. And every member from my sketch team came to the show. And I went around the room.

And we narrowed down how long it had been since they'd last seen me and how appropriate that was. I didn't see you that year. No, no, you. I had a good friend. I had a good friend

who hadn't seen me. I mean, it was funny. She hadn't seen me since 2017. Oh, wow. But after, like later the next day, she, Jessica, she was just, she'd like, she was like, I'm sorry I haven't seen you more. That was so cool.

I just said, just said, I felt seen. I felt witnessed. And Jessica's one of those few people in my life I know, yeah. That like, she can talk to me and I'll start tearing up. Yeah. And I'm like, you gotta have a couple of those in your life.

Yeah. And if it means that they don't see you seven years at a time but they still get that power but every time you see them it feels like no time has passed yeah every once in a while great eyebrows i do yeah thank you they're crazy it's the only hair that's still holding it what did you call them zendaya brows yeah they're really good anyway continue no i i appreciate that i've never got a zendaya bro um do you have a blessing page yes um so yesterday we had some shows at the comedy store in la and then you guys had an uncle function show right after and my boyfriend came out to support both and yes he was our chauffeur driving us he was was. Oh, that should have been mine. I feel bad now that I didn't. Yes, they were so nice to drive us from one show to the other.

Driving us in Elon's Tesla. It didn't blow up. Yeah, exactly. We made it there in one piece. If he had pulled up in a Cybertruck, I might have to out of principle be like, sorry, I can't get in a Cybertruck. I can't do this. That might be the like, where I draw the line.

Don't let him. Yeah. But it was really great to have him come out and see all that we're up to in real life. So it meant a lot. Yeah. Very cool. Thank you, Max. Very grateful.

Yes, thank you, Max. And we're going to have him on. And Lacey, do you have a blessing for us? Well, first I want to say that all of your blessings felt like you felt seen. Oh. Like, you felt seen doing your work and your profession pitch and, like, seeing people that love you see you succeed. That's amazing. Like, you all just felt seen.

And your Uber driver, Rosa. Rosa driver rosa she saw you too even though you was trying to not be seen by her with your headphones on but she was like i see you bitch and then you had amazing show where all of your improviser friends came and saw you and even they even though they haven't seen you in a long time, saw you and appreciated you. So I feel like this kind of episode ending is that you all felt really seen. My blessing is that I felt seen, but I have never been a person who could really see myself. So earlier today I posted,

I just sent in final copy notes for my book and I knew these blurbs and reviews were going to come in, but I got really nice blurbs from Amy Poehler, from Conan O'Brien, from a lot of people I respect in the comedy world, in the book world. And a lot of really good things have been happening to me and I haven't really been able to like appreciate them because it's kind of scary I'm like oh my life is about to change again

change is hard um but I feel really blessed that today I'm here and thank you for having me and that I slowly feel like I'm starting to be okay with what is happening to me. You know? Yeah. We are. That's so great. Well, on that note, this is coming out May 28th. Where can people find you? What do you want people to know?

Tell them about the book. Hachette Books. You can find my book anywhere um the book girl is bb fan and bitchy so i can't tell you where to go specifically because they will give me um your local they made me change a whole fucking dedication to my grandmother my dead grandmother they're like jeff bezos first right they're like you can't say that i'm like oh god okay oh my god so give me every book dedication is to jeff bezos thank you so much so much for your cue ball head i love you i love

playing pool and i love your bald ass um d-i-b-a-l-a-c-i-d valencia on all platforms scam goddess if you want to see the instagram um page where can people find you? Well, you can follow us at the downside pod on Instagram and tech talk. And yeah, we're around. Russell, where you at? At Russell J. Daniels on Instagram.

Amazing. This weekend, I will be headlining comedy cat connection in Rhode Island. Come check it out. But otherwise also join the patron patron.com slash downside. If you want to hear our live episode that we recorded at the Comedy Store with Moshe Kasher, it is fantastic. And you can only get it at patreon.com slash downside. And thank you for listening.

And Rosa, trust me, that's the first four stars Russell's ever given to an Uber driver in his entire life. This is the downside. You're listening to The Down the downside with john marco cerezi