The Downside with Gianmarco Soresi - #21 Lukas Arnold Takes a $700 Uber

Episode Date: June 22, 2021

TikTok star Lukas Arnold joins the Downside to rub his superior John Mulaney impression in Gianmarco’s face. We also talk about being in the middle of a lawsuit between your parents, the rules for impersonating celebrities of a different race, TSA thinking your mom is taking you hostage because of her last name, your dad forgetting your goddamn birthday, and taking a $700 Uber to see your dad for the last time. If you have dad this episode is extra for you!! Join The Downside Patreon for early, ad-free episodes and bonus ones on the 1st and 15th of every month. Even if you don't want to listen to them, it's a lovely way to support Gianmarco's delusions of grandeur. We also just added videos of all episodes. Wow. Follow LUKAS ARNOLD on tiktok, instagram, youtube & twitter Listen to LUKAS ARNOLD’s Two Nosy Meerkats podcast Visit LUKAS ARNOLD's website Follow GIANMARCO SORESI on twitter, instagram, tiktok, & youtube Check out GIANMARCO SORESI's special 'Shelf Life' on amazon & on spotify Subscribe to GIANMARCO SORESI's mailchimp Follow RUSSELL DANIELS on twitter & instagram E-mail the show at [e-mail] Original music by Douglas Goodhart Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

um all right uh welcome welcome to the downside uh my name is jim marcus erasium here with my co-host russell daniels our special guest today uh tiktok star voiceover star uh stand up soon to be star uh lucas arnold um russell i am uh uh i called my agent because things have been a little bit rough recently okay and i i was like you know why i've not been getting any auditions and she said because mercury's in retrograde no she did she did not she did i swear to god and i was like i was like ironically no no i said i said like oh please like you can believe in the astrology stuff in your own fucking time can you tell me the truth and she said fine you know why it's it's it's because you know you've been in a lot of these rooms and people

think that you're very difficult to work with and i you seriously say that? And I was like, okay, well, when is it out of retrograde? One, two, three. You're listening to The Downside. The Downside. So that's another idea I have for the opening. So that was a fake story. No, my old... How much of it was real?

My old manager frequently blamed things on astrology oh okay that's why you hate it so much you you never articulated that that's why i'm so anti-astrology because it's responsible for years of of not working yeah it would have been funny if she was like mercury's in retro guide and then you were like no tell me the real truth and and she's like it's because you're hard to work with. And you're like, oh. And she was like, because you're an Aries.

Yeah. Sure, sure. I think that's my problem with astrology is like, there is no escaping it because I'm a Leo. And so everyone goes, oh, of course you don't believe in it

because you're a Leo and Leos are arrogant. And I was like, well, I guess I'm trapped here. Are you an astrology guy? I'm not. Thank you. I appreciate it.

Imagine if he was i'm very offended right now and i could just tell i will say this the one thing i'll say about astrology people they don't seem to be offended even if you tell them it's the stupidest fucking thing because they know they know you think they'll know a little bit i think no no i'm not saying i'm not saying they do i I'm saying that's kind of the air about it. Even if you were to say, I don't believe it, I think it's bullshit, blah, blah, blah, they're like, mm-hmm. I see.

They're coming from an all-knowing kind of thing. I think there's just a lot of people there where some people don't believe in it, but they're like, it's fun to do. And other people do believe in it, and they have conversations together, and I'm like, you believe in it differently. It's the same with religion. Some people are like, the Ark was real. And they're having conversations with people that are like, the Ark was a metaphor.

The Ark was real. You know what would be a great Patreon is if we went to that exhibit, the Ark. The museum? Yeah, where someone actually built it. Somewhere in Tennessee or something? Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Like a replica. That would be fun to do.

Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Like a replica. That would be fun to do. Oh, yeah. There's like people riding dinosaurs at the exhibits there because that's part of the chronology. Wait, really? Yeah, because the humans had to exist. So this is our exploring the beginning of the pod. We'll get to you in a second, Lucas. I was talking to my dad. I just feel like this perfectly encapsulates a lot of my issues. My dad is like the more extreme version. So I talked to my dad. I just feel like this perfectly encapsulates a lot of my issues.

My dad is like the more extreme version. So I talked to my dad. I made the mistake. I was like, have you listened to? I don't even think I said have you listened. I said, oh, I have to go. I'm recording a podcast episode. And he was like, what?

And I was like, oh, it's called The Downside. And he's like, okay, what's a podcast? And I'm like, oh, we're not even close. We don't even understand the context. It's like I have to now explain the language. And I've explained it before. So this is why, you know, there's lots of like, why aren't we close anymore, son?

And it's like, well, because every time we talk, I have to start by setting up the actual, the premise of every element of my life yeah so it's it's not just it's not just oh what's my girlfriend's name it's what is a girlfriend yeah uh every time you know i'm headlining i'm headlining this week what does that mean what is stand-up comedy what's a microphone what's amplification it never ends yeah sound waves i feel like i feel like there's a strange thing where i don't think you have to listen to podcasts you know i can totally get why people don't but i do think that's a strange thing

that you can like i don't know drive a car and vote but you don't know what a podcast is you know i mean like there's some sort of thing but hard to know you're like that checked out of like like the world on my way here i was describing it it to my mom. My mom also doesn't know what a podcast is. We forget sometimes that the world is so fragmented that there are plenty of places where they don't listen to podcasts.

They still listen to FM radio and they have serious XM. I'm not saying that people can't vote or drive a car if they've never heard of a podcast. I just think that it's like it is a wild thing. We hear our pro

more obstacles to voting here at the downside. More voter suppression. and i'm also supposed to say this part where if you don't know what a podcast is this is a podcast dad i hope this isn't the one you figured out because i'm about to talk a little more shit about you uh this is called the downside uh i'm a stand-up comedian uh we interview people but we focus on the negative so so the negatives. So we always find out people are monsters. In their 50s and 60s, usually, it's when it comes out. But really, they were monsters to begin with, and it's because they had sadness as a child.

And that's what this podcast is. It's about the negatives. We're celebrating the negatives. We're embracing the negatives. We're not shying away from complaining because, oh, maybe it'll ruin someone else's day. Fuck someone else. This is about us today.

And fuck us. And fuck us. And fuck us. If you join the Patreon, that's one of the bonuses for the tiers is you can fuck me or Russell. $15 for John Marco. A million for me. And me if you slide into my DMs. Please join the Patreon.

It's patreon.com slash downside. The first tier is $5 a month, but you get- Add free episodes. Two bonus episodes a month. become four soon we're adding video it's fucking an amazing we're giving you everything yeah and you get to be part of if you do ten dollars a month you get to join the discord now and i'm learning what a discord is uh i messaged it did you get my message i saw you joined the discord i immediately left but i joined it for five seconds and left. It freaks me out that people could be in there.

It's a horror. It's one of these apps that feels like it's for like, it's for those fucking kids who like built their own computer in high school. And you're like, okay, I like computers, but not like my mom would always be like, you're good with computers.

I'm like, I know how to save a word document, which to you is an impressive feat. Yeah. But there are kids who get it. So my dad, I'm talking to my dad dad he had some health stuff and he's he's doing he's on the mend and uh i just want to recreate kind of like the phone call so he's he's basically saying oh yeah son you know i went to the doctor and they they did an x-ray and just wait one second

hey hey are you handicapped because you're parked in that's a handicapped spot. Are you fucking handicapped? What? You are? Okay. Okay, sorry. Just checking. So I got the x-ray back from the doctor.

You know, why don't you put the sticker? Maybe put the thing on the... No, you know what? It is my fucking business. It is my fucking business. Okay? Okay, asshead. So things are looking good overall and and i'm in the and i'm listening i'm like it's not your fucking business to just leave it alone wait so he's not trying to park in a handicapped no he's

not he's just trying to defend the rights he thinks they're doing a citizen's arrest he's doing a citizen's arrest he thinks there's an epidemic in america of people lying about the handicapped party food stamps usually those things are going hand in hand he's he's like he's never complained about like the grander things it's a specific confrontations with people right there and who knows maybe in potomac maryland there are a lot of people fucking you know pulling a fast one with the handicapped party But he makes it his business that if he sees the person and they are not visibly disabled, if they are not crawling to their car because they only have access to their fingers, he doubts it.

Because they've lost their wheelchair. They've lost their wheelchair. I have a question. Does he do that with pregnant women? Because they can also get, like, the spots at some of the stores. Really? Have you seen that? I did not know that yeah well i i i come from upstate new york so there's a lot of like strip malls and and you know little parkway you know like little those kind of mall places yeah and

walmarts and things and yeah that's another thing now that they have is like for for expecting mothers just have an expiration date on the the thing uh no so you that's what i'm saying like you wouldn't i don't know how that one works because unless you're visibly pregnant is it like you know in theory if you're just pregnant for like three weeks you could use it or best case scenario you have a miscarriage do you have this thing for the rest of your life no no no no sorry sorry it's it's it's i don think, what I'm saying is there's no pass. Like there's no, I don't think you have a pass. It's just like a spot at the thing. I see.

So it's just like a sign at the, at the thing. So I would think that if you were going to abuse one, that one's easier to abuse than the handicap because, uh. You never see this as an argument against abortion. This would be good. There you go. Yeah. I think it's like, you you know there's always the old

trope of like don't ask a woman if she's pregnant but i like the other being like you're not pregnant you're just fat you just want that handicap park that's my dad yeah yeah um well and that's just my that's my father i i don't know if we've told the story where uh we're at a restaurant i mean this person was clearly horrible but my dad was looking sad so it must have been any day of the week and the woman was like you know when you get to the gates of heaven jesus won't ask why you're so sad something something very egregious wait what like something like jesus like don't be sad he Basically, Jesus doesn't care why you're sad. But she meant it in like, cheer up because Jesus, don't bum out Jesus. He died already for our sins.

And my dad said, you know what? And double middle fingers, middle of fancy restaurant. Why don't you go fuck yourself? And just a lot of my life was my dad having this angry moment and like me just standing there like i i hope everyone knows i'm not with him yeah we look very similar but i'm not with him i don't endorse this behavior well i hope he's listening i hope this is the one episode he tunes into i hope this is the moment he figures out what a podcast is i don't think he cares he knows he knows he's got anger issues and i have anger issues and uh yeah you're doing all right uh yeah i'm i i feel a little wild and i'm traveling tomorrow

really early so i'm trying to get a lot of things where you're going again i'm going to miami for a wedding who's winning uh nicole's uh stepsister good did they postpone it because of covid yes it's so i saw something on twitter it was like pictures of people smaller now it's like a 50 person wedding now oh god that's still too big for me what was it before what was it going to be before uh you know i think a standard like 150 200 kind of thing um but uh and it was going to be in mexico but it was like at the height of covid so now it's not someone did this post on twitter it was just pictures from a wedding and everyone's looking in their beautiful bridesmaids dress, but they're all wearing face visors. And they're like,

they're like, we're all going to look back on these photos and be like, why the fuck didn't we wait? Yeah. All these hideous wedding pictures of people wearing masks and face. I don't understand it. Um, but Lucas,

thank you. How do you like that? As the, you are first guest where I was like, Hey, was that okay for you? Yeah. Cause we've had some guests, especially we just, we just had, I was like, hey, was that okay for you? Yeah. Because we've had some guests, especially we just had, I think, the episode before.

By the way, we're recording this super early. Today is September 10th, 2001. Things are wonderful. I've been thinking about that bit since I was taking a shower. We invented podcasts. We invented podcasts. We're the first one. And I'm already mad that people don't

know what it is uh so so but uh we had carmen lynch before and like carmen lynch is just like you know comedian who's a little bit older than me and just to have her sit there while we talked i just felt like so uh like apologetic just like being really polite too yeah being polite and just like so i wanted to figure out so hopefully people like this because this is what we're doing okay we'll try it for a few and what do you think of the opening with the joke it was funny how you didn't catch on and i was like russell please i didn't just be my sidekick on the couch every time i come here you have some new surprise for me to throw me and so i didn't know what to expect i was trying to go

with it like just be my Andy, Andy Richter. Is that his name? Andy Richter. His name is Richter. Richter. Conan and Andy Richter. I, and you were going off on tangents and you were like,

well, astrology, here's my theory on astrology. I was like, Russell, really? No, I know.

That is my complaint with Andy Richter. Sometimes I'm like more, give us more. That's why he has his job. Cause he knows, he knows. I going to stop. I agree, but sometimes... I don't want to go after Andy Richter on the podcast. I'm sorry. Anyways.

I want more from him. But thank you. Thank you for being here. Thank you so much for having me. Now, I know about you because I was kind of known on the scene for my fantastic john mulaney impression and then i go on twitter one day there's this video some piece of tick tock doing mulaney doing the sims and it was you and it's so much better than mine. I look more like Mulaney. Yes.

Yes. Well, you're a brunette. But you got, you just have, I have a couple of the Mulaney things, but you have the whole, you have depth and textures. Okay, let's rank the Mulaney impressions. You two and Melissa Villasenor,

who does it the best out of all of you. Now, you're a very nice guy thank you i mean i meant that as an insult you and when it comes to impressions i think like unlike some art forms i think impressions it's tough because some people do impressions i was like that's not good yeah and i seen you on tiktok you're generally supportive i've yet to see you make a video of like, here's some fucking terrible Mulaney impressions that are way worse than mine. Oh, well, why would he do that? I love that video!

No, that would hurt his case as a good impression. No, you should not. He doesn't need to do that because he's good at it. Okay, let's just bring down the rabble about this. All right, all right. See, the problem here is that you guys are assuming that there's anything that could bring down my sense of ego because I understand my supremacy. It's just it's there.

I don't need to defend it. I'm so scared to even go into mine because it's going to die. It's like he walked into the room. Go fuck yourself. Especially for people at home because they can't see the head. It's like, you know what I mean? It's just audio. It sounds so much like it.

Well, I'm going to lip sync it onto mine. And everyone's going to think I'm the best one doing the Mulaney. Okay, please, please, please, like, go in front of the camera and do, like, a full, like, 360 of your head so you can deep fake onto me. Yes. If we could combine the two of you with looks and voice, I think we would be on to it. What's a Mulaney bit? Let's compare. What's a good Mulaney bit, you know, off the top of your head?

Hold on. So, sitting on the top of your head? Hold on. Sitting on the bench. Which one? Say it. It's like, and my father came and said, I saw this kid get pushed off the seesaw and my father said,

and where were you? I was over on the bench. But why didn't you stop him? No, because I was sitting over on the bench. But you saw everything. Yes, because I was sitting over on the bench, but you saw everything. Yes, cause I was sitting over on the bench, but you did nothing,

cause I was over on the bench. Wow. Okay, you try. Oh God, that's not the one I want to do. do what you want. Do what you want to do.

No, I did not. I can do the yelling, cause I, oh no, I'm collapsing into myself. He's doing a very good one. we've all written happy birthday. How about a big ass B? Fuck. Oh, no. I'm collapsing into myself. He's doing a very good one.

We've all written happy birthday. How about a big ass B? Fuck. Here, now I'll try. We've all written happy birthday. Was that Kermit? It was Harvey Fierstein. Can you do Harvey Fierstein?

Oh, I don't have the strength. Okay, now you do it. Oh, what should I say? Or who should I do? I'm sorry, I didn't have anything. No, I did not. There's one phrase that, some false teeth and red hair dye. I'm just like...

Is there anyone you can't do? Is there anyone you really suck at? Yeah, Morgan Freeman. Sure. And that was the day that I met Andy Dufresne. It's just, I can do the rhythm,

but the actual, like the richness of the depth. You just did a really good impression for us. That was, do your Morgan Freeman. No. Well, we should clarify.

Well, no. Well, to be fair. Okay. You're allowed to do a Morgan Freeman because your mother is half black. Yes. So I think there is – what are you going to say? Genuinely, in my opinion, as long as like – okay, well, there is a lot of – so for those who don't know, I make my living as a voiceover artist. Sorry we didn't introduce our guest properly.

He's a talented voiceover artist um and sorry sorry we didn't introduce our guest properly he's a talented voiceover performer the way we did the new thing is we kind of yeah i said it at the very beginning no i know but then i forget by the time he comes in your voice artist yes so um but in the voiceover community recently there was a lot of drama because there was a voice actress who will remain nameless who is white but she has a pseudonym under which she does, like, a black woman voiceover. Oh, no, what is the pseudonym, though? I can't say. I can't say right now. Can you tell this is the pseudonym, like,

like a name that you're like, oh, that's Princess Two. It's very sort of a neutral name, but basically, like, and then she came under fire because, like, she was pretending to have this quality and stamping it with like, this is what a black woman sounds like when really it's just a person. And she just sounds. And so I don't think if you said, this is my impression of a black person, that would be bad. But if you just say, Hey, this is my Morgan Freeman impression. It doesn't matter what ethnicity you are because you're just doing one single person. Is that, is, do you feel like that's a consensus in the voiceover community right now i mean if you just said hey this is my morgan freeman

impression no one would think that i don't think anyone would think that that's you being racist or taking opportunities away from him and like if you from him yeah we were gonna have morgan freeman narrate this is a penguin no we're gonna have john marcus okay wow no but if you um no i think you can well like there's a there's a voice actor called eric bauza who's um he's filipino canadian but he does a really good chris rock and i don't think there's anything and even if he was white i don't think there's anything wrong like jimmy i think people are like jimmy fallon got a lot of flack i mean he did it that was black face okay but he yes that that was one thing but he also did it like on

award shows not in black face okay and i think it's generally i feel like the consensus right now is uh yeah don't even do that uh especially like i mean jenny slate dropped out of uh fucking well that's big mouth that's different because she wasn't trying to be well she was actually doing a black character which could have gone to a black actor that's different because she wasn't trying to be, well, she was actually doing a black character, which could have gone to a black actor. That's the point is that it wasn't used. It could have been an opportunity for a black actor, and that's why she got lit up for it. That's my understanding. No, that is the understanding.

It just feels like it all just feels so tricky with voiceover. I know voiceovers where the breakdown says they want a black person and it's like it's it's for pepsi there's nothing about it like it's not a character the person is playing but they essentially want a certain kind of sound right and they're they're identifying that sound is that sound yeah and it's like well that seems problematic already yeah no i do not there it is look um so your view is yeah my view is is that if it's if it is a a black character and whatever thing then it should probably go to a black actor but if you're just like having fun maybe showing like um like frank caliendo does a great morgan freeman impression and but it but it's it's very clear like what he's and he does like a bunch of others and it's just

it's just a good impression and i don't think there's anything problematic about it because it's not like him trying to do but it's just a talent that he has he's really good impressions and that's just one in his wheelhouse and so it all comes down to like being genuine i guess and not pretend it's not being something that you're not. It's like, I think the problem is it's been so abused for so long. Yeah. Just a white person doing like the most.

Yeah. And there's also like, there's no like agreed upon parameters that is just set for everyone. Like we haven't like sat down and said like, what is an, isn't okay. It's just like, we're trying to like work our way

through a forest almost you think that i i totally agree i i just don't even know whether like there's certain jobs are there certain jobs have you ever applied for a job where it might be the breakdown set a black person and you had to be like okay here's my headshot and maybe you i don't know you you changed the the headshot the uh the, the lighting of it to bring out your mom as best as you could so that you'd be right for the role. Just to bring out features right for somebody. But people don't know. I mean, I would say you're just a Jewish boy like me

with your curly, your dad's Jewish? Yes. Okay. But yeah, I would, if it was a breakdown that said that this is a black character or they're looking for a black actor i wouldn't audition for it really oh no really that's interesting to me oh no all my friends in the voiceover community they say the same thing and and what it's really cool is that we because we have like a good network they'll say hey we know about this uh this character that they've just opened up if you if you are a black

actor or latino or whatever it is, they're looking for this, maybe South Asian. And they're like, hey, we're looking for an actor of this ethnicity or this background. Please audition for it. It's wide open for you. Like that's the thing that'll very often happen and it's really cool. Now, because I just remember,

I was looking through all your TikToks, many TikToks. What's your favorite? What's my favorite? Well, the other one people sent me, and this is where it really started getting oh yeah oh i know yeah the italian jewish one yeah we're like you're not even italian motherfucker so it's like what the fuck why don't you give that to someone you piece of shit uh i everyone sent it because i i mean i probably again like i'm like sort of jewish i'm sort of ital. And I have Italian jokes and Jewish jokes.

I had like a couple tries at an Italian Jewish joke. You know, some general joke about it. And nothing too funny. Jokes about matzo pizza. I had a whole sketch series called Matzo Pizza. And then you come along and just you flip the whole script. And what is it again? And what is it again?

It's, I think it's pretty weird that people that are half Italian and half Jewish are affectionately called a pizza bagel when they could so much more easily be called a mozzarella stick. And I think that's a good, I think that's a good pun. Yeah, everyone else did too, apparently. John Marco, from the bottom of my heart, I'm disappointed you didn't come up with it. That's what people wrote me. They're like, for some reason, when you're a comedian, everyone's like, let me send you other successful comedians, like friends and family who are not in comedy,

or like, hey, here's someone else who's funny and doing better than you. So like 25 people sent me that video. That's why Mozza Pizza didn't take off, because if you had a creative name like mozzarella stick, it would have really hooked people in. Well, that's great. Not that it didn't take off, but you know. You're making it worse.

I give you free reign to use. If you like start another podcast, you can call it mozzarella sticks. And I give you full. I give you full ownership of that. Don't tempt't tempt make sure we're recording on to be fair uh so it did someone did comment under it that i didn't see before saying uh i think it was like a jewish chef that made like some sort of like mozzarella sticks that has like matzah in it and like the crust around the around the mozzarella and so and so that exists as a recipe mozzarella stick so that so credit where it's due sure that has existed so it's now public domain yeah anyone can use it well guys i

also i want to announce my next special coming up uh it's called mozzarella stick nice coming to youtube soon no i saw the story it was about it was you it was it was a stitch and it was you uh being at the airport with your mom. Yeah. And explain it to us. Oh, yeah. No. So the story about me with my mom is that, so as you mentioned, my mom is half black, half white, and she also has a Muslim last name. And so we got stopped a lot at airport security because they thought I was her hostage.

And for those of you who say that outright, they say, excuse me, is this your hostage? Or you just were concerned. Another thing with it is... Do terrorists usually bring their hostages through? Through the TSA? They don't usually bring their kids.

Is that a regular thing that happens? Why would he know? Just because his mom has a business. No, I'm just saying like, that's a strange thing to be like, you know. No, but what happened was that they, it was like, my mom told me this one time that we were flying from New York to London,

or a lot of my family is, and that we were held at airport security there and a big cockney TSA agent was like, Roy, who's your mom? Like to me. And it was like, it was like, Roy, who's your mom? Like to me. And it was like, you can tell me. And this was before I could speak, but I could still understand him.

So I was like, my mom was just holding me by her hip and I just pointed to her. I was like, this lady. I was just like, her? She's the one I know here. That is so upsetting. Yeah. And that only got worse after 9-11.

We've been held from flights. Really? Oh yeah. There was one time we had a connecting flight from New York to London, but we stopped off in Toronto. And we missed our connecting flight to London from Toronto. And then we were put on another flight to Montreal. And then it was bad. They just turned background checks and stuff?

I guess, yeah. They were very suspicious of us. But what's, what's interesting is that like, um, when I was 15, that was when I started occasionally flying alone and I was like, wait, no one's stopping me. This is amazing. my hair was a lot blonder when I was younger but I have fair skin blue eyes blonde dish hair and like when I was younger I looked even whiter than I do now and like it was even though I've had like white privilege my whole life that was a moment where I got just a little extra nugget of it where I was able to take I was just like because my name is Lucas Arnold it's a very you go through the metal detector you're just standing there they're like sir what are you doing you're like are we going in the room now yeah were you interrogate me for three hours like no they never they never uh thingied me um that never happened but uh but we were held a lot and it was a thing like growing up that i just

understood oh we need to leave like an extra hour before just to deal with security in case anything happens just like leave and get to the airport at least three hours before your flight just because like anything could happen and yeah and so i just grew up with that as like the norm and then later on i was like i can just get there an hour before i don't even need this is this is okay do you know one time i realized my extreme white privilege at a at a airport um i was going through and i can't remember where i was coming from but it was somewhere where i needed headshots and i was like still cutting them out at the time and i had the largest pair of scissors that i've ever seen i can't believe

i own these pair of scissors and they were just like i mean think of normal scissors like normal adult scissors and then add like two inches like so big do you know what i mean like you're like these are big scissors and um uh they were my backpack and i was going through and they stopped me and they were like they looked and they measured and they said ah it's too big but it's you're fine and i remember being like you should probably take those scissors like yeah this is a situation where i would have been like no you should take these scissors from me like this i could do anything with these on the plane you know well as you know i think white privilege is a myth uh i can tell no let's go

into an ad commercial um no i will always remember this is pre-9-11 too this's always pre 9-11, but my family and I went to... Well, this is getting recorded on September 10th. Right. You're right. Pre 9-11, 1999. Airport is super easy breezy. Cover girl. I was in Mexico and we were coming back from Mexico.

And the system in Mexico at the time was you went there and there was like a street light. And you just waited and they quote unquote randomly it would flash red and they'd search your bag or green and they just let you right through and knowing the way the world works now I have a feeling

that the people at the desks like had a button underneath that if they're like this person looks fishy red light but at the time it was just like yeah we'll cut down on terrorist attacks by 50 with this randomizing system and that's how they did it yeah wow it all feels pretty i don't know i people always have stories they they leave a knife in their bag and it gets through tsa it's hard to believe that this is doing anything. Oh, even without like the occasional odd item in your bag. Like I have a great aunt who I think is a fashion designer and she's just not been allowed in the country for like 15 plus years or something

like that. And like my granddad is a painter. He still like has trouble entering the country. It's like without a visa, it's, it's difficult. It's just's just it's just this has just been like a very regular conversation my whole life that i've just been aware of so yeah your whole family's just you're like go ahead lucas go go back to america what is funny is that um in my senior year of college and for my so my neither of my parents came to see like the shows that i did in college and i was a theater major and um but for my final play in college my mom came to see me and um this was like right after did you see that video where like this like it's like an asian man in glasses and he gets like dragged off the plane because they need someone to volunteer i remember yes and um it

was a and it was a united flight and my mom said hey i'm coming to see you by the way guess what airline i'm coming in on and i was like oh no don't tell me it's United. And she was just like, ha ha ha ha ha. She just like had this cackle. And then she came through fine. She came through airport security totally fine. And yeah, my mom is like, maybe they switched from like Muslim last names to just older Asian men. That's now the target of all these airlines. She did also just get American citizenship by that time. So I think that might have helped. You think that changed it? I think so. It's, I hate airports.

Yeah. You know what sucks is that growing up, I loved airports. I always loved it. Because you spent most of your life there waiting for your mom to get through. So you're like, I love the food here. But I had Heelys as a kid and airport floors.

That's the place for Heelys. Really? Airport floors? Oh yeah, they're so smooth. I definitely love the moving sidewalks. That and airport floors. That's the place for Heelys. Really? Airport floors? Oh, yeah. They're so smooth. I definitely love the moving sidewalks. That's always fun. That's fun.

Now, do you stand or do you walk with them? I walk against. You walk against? Oh, yeah. And it looks, before, I learned how to moonwalk because I was obsessed with the moonwalk. And before you could do that, that was like the cheap man's moonwalk is just walk against the automated walkway. One of the scariest moments I had as a kid was I got on the escalator going the wrong way.

So I'm like moving down, but my parents are up and I'm trying to get to them. But the escalator is moving me down. And I had this crisis of like, I can't, I can't beat the escalator. I started sobbing and my parents like, just, just go down, just go down and come back up. But I was, I had a meltdown. Yeah. down just go down and come back up but i was i had a meltdown yeah oh um so so uh we're gonna talk about voice so i don't even know let's you are jewish too because everyone seems to be jewish somehow in this everyone is but who's jewish my dad your dad i was not raised jewish i was not

raised jewish at all um but raised completely without religion um yeah yeah nothing do you did you do birthright? No. No, no, no. It's a great time. I did. This was before Israel was problematic, though. A couple years ago.

Was it before? It's, listen, I mean, I cannot endorse it at this moment, but it was a very good trip. Very little propaganda. At the time, it was a bunch of soldiers joined your trip, and all our soldiers were very kind of... Were they attractive? They were attractive, but they were all seeing people. They were all kind of taken. They were all... They should make it single soldiers.

Then I would recommend it. I heard, because I know people that have done Birthright, and they show you a bunch of super attractive soldiers to be like, hey, stay in the country a little bit longer than you were expecting. Why don't you? Ours was very little propaganda and all the soldiers were very like leftist.

I mean, they were very like critical of Israel's government. It was a free vacation. That's why I went at the time. I did not do my research. And I think I told you, I once did a show where I did a story about birthright and like afterwards this guy walked up and he's like, so you drank the kool-aid huh and I was like oh no I just wanted

the nice free hummus but uh so don't go now but if if you know I'll be honest I'm kind of like I've I was talking to a friend about it like a couple years ago he was like dude it's a free trip I was like I don't really want to I know what they're, I don't feel it. I'm really not feeling, I've also been like, growing up, I wasn't that close with like my Jewish family members. And most of them are lovely, lovely people. Like, especially like my dad died recently. And a couple of them are reached out to say like, Hey, we're so sorry to hear he loved you so much. We're so proud of everything you've done. It's very sweet stuff. But, uh, going to visit like my grandmother in Florida, she died when i was 10 but i but my dad's mom she uh she lived in florida and going to visit her i was sheltered a lot from

shit that my mom experienced quite racist stuff and and but later on she told me about it and she told me that like uh like there was a pool across the street from my grandmother's building and my mom would take me there and that like old jews uh they would be like oh is she gonna get in the pool too she's not gonna get in the pool oh she's getting in the pool oh she's getting in the end like and i was totally blissfully all john mulaney relatives for the back oh no she's getting they were all characters from big mouth um um that's uh horrible yeah is there anything so like, like, is there a certain things where you're like, fuck, I, your mom had this whole experience with that kind of shit that you might not have just because of the, you know, the way you, you look.

Yeah. I mean, did, did she like, was there an age where she like started sharing these experiences or you started noticing it more? It wasn't noticing it. It was her telling me. It was because I've,, like, my Jewish family, like, I see them very few and far between times. It's like if someone gets bar mitzvahed or dies,

that's really it. And it was my mom, like, letting me in on stuff later on. Like, in sort of, like, late teens, that's when she started telling me stuff. Also one time when I'm also visiting my grandmother in Florida where I was, like, maybe three, and my mom was just holding me on her lap, and that, like, old ladies who were, like, very close family friends of my grandmother in Florida where I was like maybe three and my mom was just holding me on her lap and that like old

ladies who were like very close family friends of my grandmother they started playing matchmaker for my dad pretending that my mom and I didn't exist we were in the room they were speaking at full volume yeah what the fuck wait

this is who this is your dad's mother this is my dad's mom, her close friends over in the living room for like- And like out loud, just like being monstrous. I mean, that's monstrous behavior. Yeah. Wow. And so, and I need to make this clear in case like any family members, like most of my family members that I've met and know on a first, they're lovely people who never,

who honestly probably didn't weren't, weren't there in the room. They were just all lovely people who were very sweet to my mom and myself. Most of them are fine, but like, but it was like a couple instances like that, that my mom told me about that just made me, it made me feel very angry and very protective knowing that that's something

that she experienced and that she's just sheltered me from amazingly. And the, it's worrying knowing that someone can shelter you that that's something that she experienced and that she's just sheltered me from amazingly. And the it's worrying knowing that someone can shelter you that well from something. Cause it's like, Oh shit, what else is there? It's like, there's a lot.

Yeah. I'm glad, I'm glad they didn't call you after your dad passed. I'm like, well, you don't have any parents anymore. Cause you never had a mom. I guess.

What? My mom is John Cena. Just like, Oh, I'm sorry. You're in these photos alone. Um, well, I, I'm of course, sorry to hear about your dad. Yeah.

Thank you. I appreciate it. I, you know, I saw it on TikTok. I was like, oh, funny, funny video. And I'm like, oh, shit, you did a serious one. Yeah. That got a lot of likes. It did.

Genuinely, I just thought, okay, there's bound to be some people that have like iffy relationships with their with one or both of their parents they might find this valuable and like a good few people like message me and i was like good it was worth it then i think it's totally worth it i think it's just like it's always interesting we all have different relationships to social media and like i think there's there's some there's like some people who like lean on emotional stuff where it's it's just strange. I think social media is such a weird, fucked up system where we are all putting things on there essentially to get attention and likes and boost our profile. And then your video was lovely and it was earnest.

But we've been talking recently. There's someone on Twitter where it feels like they're manipulating. someone on Twitter where it feels like they're like manipulating, they're, they're, they're using like emotional pain as like a constant source for content. And like you get, or maybe you get comfort and it's like, is it meaningful? But there's strangers and this, it's like the whole platform to me is so poisoned. Yeah. It's what I feel about people that live like their whole lives online where they, you see like everything about them and they sort of like, it really seems like they can't have a normal relationship without them

trying to monetize it or use it for content or something and that really creeps me out i i agree i think the thing about it is i think people can have like some sort of you know you can start off by sharing something that makes you vulnerable and blah blah and other people share and that's helpful to them and you blah blah but there is sometimes a thing of like then when you see it go beyond a point where you start being like but then this is helping you and that kind of is there's a sadness to that that that you're like that that it can be that much of a source of your thing where all of your content everything that you're putting out there is that yes that weird thing and you're like you're it's like impossible to keep that

going because you're like at some point it feels not healthier to be sustainable yes if you sustain it it's not healthy yes yes yeah i said i'm a little bit worried because i like i posted a video early today making a joke about my dad's death yeah i mean you know that's what you yeah it's what you want to do what were you worried about it dad's death yeah i mean you know that's what you yeah that's what you wanted to do well you're worried about it oh no because inside i was thinking oh shit am i like am i having a bad attitude towards like my own oh yeah yeah well i think that's what's tough about it yeah i think in general like i'm like of a mindset right now where i'm like never sincere like maybe i'll if i'm gonna be I'll retweet, I'll repost other people's things,

but I'm not a journalist. But you can be sincere in funny stuff. You can be sincere, funny stuff, but I'm always like, I feel safer for me to like, if, if I'm not going to express a vulnerability because getting the messages,

even saying sweet things for me, it doesn't touch my heart. Like if I, if I need emotional support, like I'm going to see you, I'm going to see my friends or I, it doesn't touch my heart. If I need emotional support, I'm going to see you, I'm going to see my friends, or I'm going to talk to my therapist. That's the only thing that's going to touch my heart.

To me, comments and likes and shares and we love you, we support you, it all enters. It doesn't do anything to me. It's not a person to me, flesh and blood, who knows me. This is also how I feel about like people posting like really personal stuff like oh my god it's this per it's like one of my besties birthday today

i love her so much and it's like a bunch of photos that they post and it's just like you could just say happy birthday or have a phone call or a day with your friend and make that meaningful to that person but like making it something that you post about online that really creeps me out and that really bothers me it's like yeah it's interesting how everyone has weird things like everyone has specific things on social media that you're like for some reason this makes me is so strange to me and i think everyone has their own things um comedians what's interesting about it when a famous comedian dies and jp mcdade kind of did a very good tweet as isolating this. So check them out. But,

but it was something just like, Oh, this person died. Uh, they were amazing. I remember when I opened for them in St. Louis and they said to me like, you,

you're the best comedian I've ever seen. You should have a Netflix special someday. All these posts, like it becomes about them. Yeah. And it's all just like, I think it's weird that like when people die, I mean,

God, if you're a celebrity, have we talked about wheat camera? If we talked about in the podcast, I think it's weird that like when people die, I mean, God, if you're a celebrity. Have we talked about, I can't remember if we talked about in the podcast that one person's or was that a practice podcast? The one time where I talked about that person's 9-11. Oh, tell the 9-11, please. I can't remember if it was, we talked about this already on the podcast, but I'll be quick. But anyways, I saw this year on 9-11.

I saw that this person I know on facebook posted this long thing and it was like this person every year posts the same kind of thing where basically it's like um i'll never forget where i was on 9-11 you know that kind of post and then they go through and they give every sort of detail on where they were in 10th grade english class and their teacher was wearing this and they do this whole long thing and they'll be like and I'll never forget that my English teacher Mr. Miller he was frantically trying to call his daughter who worked in the Twin Towers and um and he was just he was so worried that whole day not knowing how his daughter was I'll never forget that and and then so then you

read this and you're like well what the fuck happened to his daughter so i'll never forget that and and then so then you read this and you're like well what the fuck happened to his daughter so i'm but i'm like i don't know this person i'm not gonna comment but i'm watching the post i'm like so someone goes did you ever find out happening what happened to his daughter and this woman goes honestly i don't know and you're like what the fuck is the point of this story then? If you're like, for 19 years, I've been like, I remember where I was. And I'll never forget how worried my teacher was. And then you just had no sort of follow up to be like, oh, actually, his daughter.

Because you know the answer is that his daughter was fucking fine. Because if your English teacher's daughter died in 9-11, you would remember. So I'm like, why are you sharing this story? It's barely a story for your English teacher to tell now. I mean, they could, but you're like, you have to share it year after year with no follow-up? Why find Mr. Miller on Facebook, contact him, say, is your daughter alive? No, you don't want to do that. Is your daughter alive?

What if in 19 years you used to contact, hey, I've been telling this story a while. Whatever happened is your daughter alive? What have been 19 years you used to contact hey I've been telling this story a while whatever happened to your daughter? They're still searching through the rubble Oh my god It's just like it's those kind of insane posts where you're like you're turning this whole

you're turning this thing through your own eyes and it's a human thing we all do it to varying degrees sometimes but sometimes it's so outrageous on social media yeah that that's the thing i think it's just posts in general the goal is to get likes and so it all feels tainted everything feels tainted yeah in a way there's no pure intention behind it it can't be because of just the nature of how social media is set up i think that's the thing it does remind me though like i do have a friend who um uh a friend of mine from college who is a lighting designer and

his nine 11 story is it's one of my favorite things. Well, he like, so he grew up in Connecticut and he was at home sick. Um, and he, I think he was like six years old at nine 11. So he was at home sick in Connecticut. His dad worked in New York city and was sent home early just for like safety and he was fine. Um, but he was sent home early and he arrives home to see his son, my friend, who was watching the news, didn't realize it was the news, thought it was a movie. And he was like, dad, special effects in this movie are amazing. And he was just like, I'm sorry, son, I can't deal with this right now. Oh, my God. That's how I knew it was serious. When I went home, my stepdad came home from work, which was pretty rare. And he was just watching the TV like a hawk.

And I was like, because when it happened, I was in like fifth grade. I didn't know how bad a thing it was. Like I knew, I thought like, oh. Wait, how old were you? I was. You would have been 10-ish or. 10-ish or 11-ish. 10 or 11-ish.

So like in my mind i was like well bad things happen all the time in the world this is just a one of the bad things i didn't realize like oh this is going to like change america oh yeah this is going to change how we all i have no memory of the day and i grew up here i have no just turned 26 yeah i just turned 26? Yeah, I just turned 26. I was six years old when 9-11. Oh, to be six on 9-11. Yeah. To be six. I remember the next day at school. Sounds like the beginning of a Frank Sinatra song.

Oh, to be six on 9-11. All I remember is that the next day, there were some third graders with a toy plane in the hallway. And they were joking about, we're having a plane. And I said to them, I said, hey, that is not a laughing matter. I was a fifth grad i said to them i said hey that is not a laughing matter like i was like a fifth grader like scolding them and now i've dedicated my life to making 9-11 jokes yeah i'm working on a new one right now and it it bombs yesterday good don't good choice of words um so uh let's take our commercial break okay y'all afraid of ghosts how about ghost peppers it's the moment you've been waiting for. The ghost pepper sandwich is back at Popeye's. A buttermilk battered chicken breast served on a

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Buy from DysonCanada.ca. With ANC on, performance may vary based on environmental conditions and usage. Accessories sold separately. And we're back. So your father,

were your parents married they were they were married um well yes i got that they were they were on route they were they were in a legal battle for divorce for the past four years like straight after i graduated from college and it was very because i was also like caught right in the middle of it and it was also like sort of a battle over property and it was it was very it was it was for ownership of the apartment that i live in that i grew up in sure and it um good apartment it was a very good apartment and um and yeah so it was thought that like my mom and i would retain ownership of this apartment my dad would uh keep our property in upstate new york and then my dad tried to take ownership of the apartment and

all of the property for himself by basically ripped the rug out from under us and had like a he had a lawyer that behind our backs and then my mom had to get a lawyer so they were so you you were team mom from the get like like it was like you do you feel like you were part of this oh absolutely really i will i was part? I was part of the fight. And then it was really tough because my dad also, because when it started happening, it came to both me and my mom as a surprise. And then my mom was like,

your dad isn't saying anything to me. I called him. He's not saying he can speak to me. Call him to find out what's happening. I was like, okay. And so I called him and he said, I'm so sorry. My lawyer says I can't talk to you about it. Oh, I'm so sorry. I said, what? This never happened in my life him and he said, I'm so sorry. My lawyer says I can't talk to you about it. Oh, I'm so sorry.

I said, what? This never happened in my life. And he said, I'm so sorry. I'm not at liberty to discuss this. And I was like, well, we don't have a relationship then. And so for two years, we just, communication was at a bare minimum. Occasionally, like he would still get mail to like my place, like home. And so I would meet with him to like give him his mail.

And we just, you just slid it over and walked away or was it we literally just meet up at a train station like a drug deal and it was just like here's your mail and then i would just walk away i wouldn't i would no fat on the on the meeting and that would go on for two years until my dad got a new lawyer and the lawyer was like yeah you can talk to your son about this and And he was like, thank you. And he was really glad about it. And then he told me, basically confirmed every suspicion that I had. And I thought, okay, life is short. Try to have a relationship with your dad. But the thing is, like, there was, like, little things happened where he, like, just didn't tell me about it.

And then so we were very on and off. And then last December, he got diagnosed with cancer. And it was like stage four with metastases elsewhere in his body. And it was really rough. How old is he? He was 76. He turned 77 this year. Oh, wow.

So he was an older... Yeah, he was 51 when I was born. Wow. Didn't look it. Looked way younger. He took really weirdly good care of himself. It was very strange. But yeah

and it was interesting like so last week was my birthday and I had brunch with my mom because my mom is helping me with like funeral arrangements and stuff and while we were having brunch she said I don't want to like speak too much about your dad but I just I hope you know that he would wish you a happy birthday today and that he loved you so much

and I was like yeah he forgot to wish me happy birthday last year he didn't and then she was and then she was like don't you dare they will use that in court against you you wish him a happy birthday you want him to have the apartment there you go no but and then she was and then and then she tried to like salvage it a little bit she was like maybe he was just busy with stuff and he forgot to call and i was like no no no mom he called me but forgot to wish me happy birthday he asked it was some sort of logistical thing maybe like mail it was something else but it was it was just a call and i was like is that it and he was just like yeah and i was like okay and then the next day he was like i'm so sorry i forgot i was like okay and yeah it was um it's brutal my dad's my dad's forgotten my birthday once and it really felt like i know

i'm a forgetful person okay and i don't think it's necessarily always indicative of caring it's partly just a bad character flaw but yeah but it it it like... It hurts. There's no way, yeah. When I'm your son, you were there. I'm also his only... You were there for the day. I'm also his only child. He has no other children.

You're right. My dad is too. That is brutal. So it's not as bad for you. So you got to spend... You got to see him a little as... Well, what happened was like, it was, so my dad died on May 8th. And so that was a Saturday.

And the when, and so like Tuesday that week, my dad was, he was on his way upstate to stay with some like family friends upstate. And that on the way up, he, his condition just like really worsened and he was taken to a hospital upstate and that on the way up, um, he, his condition just like really worsened and he was taken to a hospital, um, upstate. And then the next day I was getting calls from these family friends being like, Hey, um, he's really, he's not going to last very long. Get up here as soon as you can, if you can to like spend some final moments with him and just take advantage of this time. And so I like frantically just like put together some bags and i got an uber a 700 700 oh yeah wait so this from where to where time one more time uh from brooklyn to cooperstown new york it was a four four and a half hour drive i'm kind of shocked like even

you could get an uber me too like it was it was also drivers got to be like, oh, okay. Yeah. I was very surprised. It was a great driver. Yeah. I forget his name, but shout out to you. Did he make a comment when you got in? Your dad must be dying or something. Is there someone dying? I did tell him.

I was like, hey, this is me rushing to see my dad who's dying. Thank you very much for driving. And he was like, yeah, of course. He was just very quiet. Did he play that music after that? No. Cause you know, like sometimes it just be funny if like you said that and then he's just like,

puts on like, I'm on a highway to hell. Um, but, but the interesting thing is that like I brought, I brought some food in the car with me, but I was afraid to eat it cause I was afraid of ruining my Uber rating. Oh my God. Even though I was like i'm doing i'm trying to do this as a bit because like on one hand i was like that's a

great bit you have to oh yeah and like i was like on one hand you know i want to have my energy to spend like a final moments with my dad but on the other hand i can't go down to 4.7 after i work so hard to get to 4.9 this is oh if it gives This is... It's like this kid bummed me out. Bummer of a passenger. Did not want to talk. Your dad's dying. So what do you do? So you were able to get there.

I was able to get there. I got there at like 11.30 p.m. And then it was a family friend who I was coordinating with. And she stayed with me. And we got really close over a couple days that I was upstate. And she stayed with me and we got really close over like a couple days that I was upstate and um and she was there for like the night of and then I went to see stay with another friend who my dad was going to stay with originally um and so I stayed

there for like a couple nights and so Thursday and Friday I just spent each whole day in the hospital just like by my dad and it was it was really off because like before i got there um this woman who she put her phone up to my dad and said if in case you don't make it in time you can say you're some final words and my dad sounded like darth vader yeah because like the breathing like the death rattle that's what it sounds like over the phone it's really weird and then like and then in person it was it was so much worse but there was so much worse in person oh so much sound yeah because it was also like my dad's face was like so much more like gaunt and very yeah yeah just like strung out and then i think it was on the

friday that i um i was by my dad and the woman who i was staying with, um, she texted me and she, and she said, um, because my dad is also like very spiritual, um, which I don't know. But, um, and so he had a lot of very hippie dippy friends upstate who she was one of them.

And she tell you though, if you're going to go, I want hippie dippy friends with me. I don't need a friend. Really? Let me tell you why. Okay. Tell me why.

Because what happened was this woman who I was staying with, she texted me and she was like, Lucas, do you meditate? And I was like, why are you asking? And she said, because I am right now and I'm communicating with your father. He has something he wants to tell you. Oh, no. What was it? Fuck if I know.

Oh, you said that. No, but here's what happened. She was like, try to meditate with your dad and just close your eyes and just try to listen with your heart and breathe in time with him. She told me to try to breathe in time with him. But the thing is, I learned this, when a body is shutting down, it needs less and less oxygen because it's just running fewer functions in the body. So the gaps between his breaths got longer and longer and I was trying to breathe in time with him and I was getting dizzy.

I was like, wait, bitch, are you trying to kill me too? What the fuck? Oh, God. So she didn't say what she was- That's hard with the hippie-dippie thing. I feel like I can dip into hippie-dippie and really meet someone's hippie-dippie at their level. I don't want messages.

I never want to like, to go to that thing is like sure to me specificity is the enemy of spiritual feelings oh yeah and so there's just like a no what is he saying don't give mom the apartment like it's just like it's it's i'm saying like to if i'm dying i want to be with people who are like you're going in to the the consciousness of god and i'm like yes yes yes yes oh no but and uh but the woman who i wasn't staying with who was like a closer friend of my dad and who i got close with she also like said that she could read people very well and she said that she could tell what like my father was saying and she was and she's like just and she could read people very well. And she said that she could tell what like my father was saying.

And she was, and she's like, just, and she's like, what I'm getting from your dad is he's just trying to say, I love you. Like, that's just what he's saying.

And I thought I'm going to choose to believe that. That's what I'm going to choose to believe. That's nice. Yeah. Yeah. And, um, and she holds,

she also said at one point that like, cause I was also like just fighting through tears that she's like, your dad's spirit is standing beside you and his hand is on your shoulder. Um, and then, but later on she said, I think he's back in his body right now. And Oh,

he's dancing around now. Yeah. Oh, but here's the thing is that like my dad, when he was alive, he told me that like he, he did tell me that he had experiences where he astral projected, where he, or he nearly had out

of body experiences but each time he got scared and returned to his body so weirdly i was like she might be on to something she might actually have the gift interesting your dad's a little freaking out now he's going back in his body literally that's what she said she was like i think he got scared and went back oh oh that is tough like i i usually i'm not a super confrontational person but i do feel in that moment i'd be like hey i need you guys to stop talking to me like period like because you're emotional and you might want to feel things yeah and like i don't need tests right now it could take you out of it you know she could wait a few months years yeah to share that you know so did you have the

funeral uh we did we're to have like a memorial service, uh, this weekend. Uh, cause he, we had him cremated as per his wishes and we're going to scatter them about, uh, the land,

uh, upstate. And that's where we're going to end. So like, see just a couple of family friends with us. And is your mom coming with that too? Yeah. Yeah.

So she's like, it's always so hard. And it seems like when it's contentious like this, like your mom might still care about this person, but it was horrible. I mean, it sounds like she definitely didn't. She was like,

in spite of everything, like I did love him. Like we had you there's I, I, I have so much love for, and I just, and she was, she was like,

Oh yeah, I just want to be here for you. And also because like I did. Yeah. Yeah, of course. She sounds like she's being wonderful about it because I mean, it sounds like with these kinds of cases, you know, that's, that sounds like she's being wonderful about it because I mean, it sounds like with these

kind of cases, you know, that's, that's what happens with divorce in my mind. I mean, I, I, my parents, I grew up with divorced parents and then another divorce and the trial gets so ugly that the ability to like not bad mouth the other parent or complain about the other parent with your kid becomes, I'm sure, just a mammoth emotional task. Well, made it worse. If this isn't a bummer enough, there is another detail which made it worse is that a couple months before he died,

my dad had told his lawyer that I apparently didn't care about ownership of the apartment and he was trying to use that as leverage of why he should be able to keep it or just sell it because eventually he just wanted to sell it. And what I actually said was that I was so tired of these divorce proceedings that I just wanted it to be done with and that I'll deal with whatever happens and that,

that I just wanted this to be done. And he took that to like, he twisted my words. And so I went to, that's really ugly, man. And my mom, like my mom,

like called me through to you saying like, you need to see him in person and tell him that this is not what you said. And I was like, I absolutely do. And so I went to see him and I was like, if you're, it was like, I can accept that you're working against me, but I can't, I can't have a relationship with you if you're going to twist my words in your favor. So no, just no community. And then I didn't speak to him for like two months at all. And then I saw him like just a couple days before like he left uh upstate and uh and that was it that was the last time i saw him in person it was like just one last

time and it was it's weird it's weird to think because i also have like because i started like interviewing him about his life because like his dad died before i was born and like he interviewed him about his life and i have those recordings and it was my that was the first time I ever heard my grandfather's voice um and so I wanted to do that with him as well and so I I did get to do like a couple of recordings and I did one and that like last day that I was there just like I just brought up my phone voice memos and I did a little bit of recording good for you because he had like all this bad stuff. He had a really amazing life. Like he worked like on a kibbutz in Israel when he was like 19. And then he was also like a traveling musician in Greece. He was an archaeologist in Turkey.

He was part of like a people's resistance in Czechoslovakia in the 70s. Like he did a lot of shit. Yeah. And so I really wanted to like record these stories. And like I did eventually get to like a good cluster of ones that like really made an impact on me, but I do wish I could have done more. It's good.

Funny enough. I never met my dad's dad because he died before I was born, but my dad's dad sued my dad because he like, this was, this was a story and I have very mixed details cause it comes from my mom and they're divorced. So this could have been, but what I was told details because it comes from my mom, and they're divorced, so this could have been. But what I was told is that my grandfather gave my dad money to help with the business.

And my dad claimed it was a gift. My grandfather claimed it was a loan and sued him for the money. And they had a contentious—my grandfather left my dad's family for a different family in Florida. Very, very bad. But it's so nice that your dad did that with his dad because i i've never heard my grandpa i think i've seen one picture of him i couldn't pick him up out of a lineup uh but i don't know anything about my dad's dad so like same yeah these records they're so you have a recording of this i do i that's great i have the recordings of my grandfather and i do have some

recordings i do have a couple recordings of my dad and then also like other like stories from his life he had actually typed up for me and he emailed to me before he died so i have everything is like recorded in some fashion which i'm really i'm very grateful for these lawsuits it's it's just really hard i don't know what the answer is because obviously people get entrenched in their own point of views but they do this kind of unforgivable damage to to relationships and it's like when you look in the view of death it's like fucking forget the fucking apartment man just like have some good conversations before you go yeah and it was also that like when i told my dad i was like hey you twisted my i actually asked him i was like if you would apologize right now let's i'm like willing to accept that you just got that you listened that you heard me wrong and that you reported it but you just heard me wrong would you apologize for

that and he was like why and and then after like 20 minutes of arguing he was he said sorry but very much in and i'm sorry you feel that way kind of way and i was just like god damn it brutal brother oh yeah um well uh that was uh wonderful now we could do a new segment tough right turn no no this is beautiful wonderful this was wonderful and i think uh we really went for it yeah i think it's gonna get a lot of likes on tiktok i um nice so let's go to this has got to stop Please No This has got to stop This has got to stop You said you'll listen

To an episode So you know what this is Yes I do Wonderful Thank you so much For being prepared What has got to stop Lucas Okay

Other than Other than Parents suing Their fucking kids For apartments This is so much This is so much smaller It's people playing music

On speakers in the subway Or in any sort of locked inside public area where you're trapped. And that, that bothers the hell out of me. I just, I can't. Now,

why? Now here's the question. I totally agree. Yes. Why do they, why are people doing this? Do they not have headphones? Is it,

I don't know. One time, one time I said that to someone and they were like, maybe they can't afford headphones. And I said, I, and like, I was the asshole. And I was like, I was a little someone and they were like, maybe they can't afford headphones. And I said, I, and like, I was the asshole.

And I was like, I was a little like the thing of like, that may be true. That may be true that they can't afford the headphones, but I'm a little like, then what blue speaker is less expensive. You got to listen somewhere else. Like you,

it's one of the, it's one of those things where you're like, but everyone's here together and we just don't all get to do everything we want to do in that moment. Like you, it's one of the, it's one of those things where you're like, but everyone's here together and we just don't all get to do everything we want to do in that moment. Like we, I don't think we should be able to eat like slop soups and fish and things like that. And I'm also putting into that category listening without headphones. So yeah, I didn't want to take your thing. I know. I completely agree.

I've always had a fantasy, one of my confrontation fantasies. Oh, I know what you mean. That I would start playing specifically Spice Girls, which are saved on my phone. I was a big Spice Girls fan. That I would counter it by playing Spice Girls as loud as I could and be like, sorry, I guess we're all just listening to what we want out loud on the train. I don't know. I kind of want to do that now.

I want to get a Bluetooth speaker and just wait. Listen, I was scared to do it because of physical violence. And no offense, but you should not be doing this. You're going to get your ass kicked. What are you saying, John Marco? You're going to get the shit kicked out of you is what I'm saying. Can you fight? Are you a good fighter? Can you fight? Every couple days i can roll well i can i can dodge and roll

well i did martial arts when i when i was younger and i remember how to roll like protecting my head and stuff so i can i can do that well you're gonna be rolling around the tray you're gonna be rolling around like sonic the hedgehog yeah um yeah i can't fight. No. It's those fantasies I have. I'm always like, one day I'm going to learn a martial art, and that's when I'm going to start just going after people. Like just a vigilante? I completely agree. I think we can all agree that has got to stop. Please don't wear a mask and actually just have it all as promo for your podcast.

Sure. All right. And now we go to we have had i will say this has been a sufficiently downside episode you said you listen our episode with mike caplan and michael's very positive very tough to make him negative and i feel like uh people should listen to this one and it balances out you know what's weird before i started comedy i would see him at my supermarket really yeah we shop at the same area and i was like that's the guy from comedy central presents he's really good and i was very afraid of ever i'm in general i'm just very afraid of like even if it's a positive confrontation like just saying oh i've seen you i think you're really funny that still like really

scares me a lot so i never said if there's anyone who would like be friendly, it would be Mike. Oh, I know. He'd be like, let's go out to dinner. Why didn't you write me before? We could have had a whole friendship. You should do his podcast. He'd love to have you. Oh, I'd love that.

I will set up an introduction. I'm happy to do that. Oh, please. Okay, so let's have a real blessing. Okay, you go first. So I did a podcast. I'm going to put it in the show notes. I forget the name, but it's one where you do the podcast with your parent.

And it was all over Zoom, and I had to choose my mom. I could not, my dad being like, you know, talking about the son, be like, Hey, do you have a handicap? It would have been a disaster. So it had to be my mom. There was no question about it. But I didn't know if my mom, I didn't know if she'd be up for it.

You never know as a comedian. You don't know if people are like down to talk about whatever. And my mom was, it took a little bit to get the, you know, the setup of her computer on and all these things. But she was very sweet, very told good stories. And a lot of it was kind of marriage game show

in terms of like, tell me what the other person likes to drink or like how would this person react? And then you assess if the person kind of knew you well enough to get it correct. And my mom knew me very well. One of the questions was like, they asked her was if it was the end of the world an asteroid was coming there was 90 minutes left what would joe marco do and she was like oh he'd probably just like run in

in the middle of the street in circles going fuck fuck fuck and i was like wow mom you you know me yeah so well that was entirely accurate um and she was just a great sport. And I'm going to do a Patreon episode with her now. Oh. You know, really start exploiting all my real life. And I'll be there. Well, this might be when I go to L.A. Oh. But first, go to L.A. with us.

I'd love to have you. Or maybe wait until she's here. I thought I was going to get to talk to your mom. I want to have you with, like, my sisters and with my mom. But I just don't know when logistically it'll happen. Yeah. But I'd love to have you there. So that's my blessing.

Good work, mom. Uh, uh, hanging in there. Um, Russell. Um,

my blessing is, um, so I had this weekend, uh, to myself, but, uh, an interesting thing happened where I felt like I bonded with my cat.

Uh, like we're, I know him for seven years now, An interesting thing happened where I felt like I bonded with my cat. Like we're, I know him for seven years now, but I felt like there was like some progress in terms of like our relationship. Really? Yeah. I felt like it's timed up with our dog. Our dog just died.

And so I felt like the cat was like, okay, the dog's dead. Or I don't know what he gets of it, but you know,'s dead and then nicole was gone so i'm like does he think i'm just killing off family members so i was like is he maybe just he's scared of me and he's like oh i don't get killed because these other he's gotten rid of half the house in like the last week so i don't know if he was scared but anyways he was just sweeter and he was more communicative. Like I felt like I could, we, we were just, I knew what he wanted.

I don't always know what he wants. He's a cat, you know? And so it's not like a dog. So like he, he's sometimes cagey about things and he can, sometimes he can bite and blah, blah, blah. And I just felt like we were communicating really well over the weekend. And we, we, we, and also he seemingly out of nowhere learned how to fetch like a dog. No way.

Yeah. What? So, like, I filmed it. I put it on Instagram. Can I ask, very quick, forgive me for interrupting. Yeah. But what kind of cat is it? Is it a Maine Coon?

Because I'm aware that they kind of behave like dogs. I didn't know there's different cats other than, like, the famous. I didn't know there was one called that he's a Maine Coon are we still saying that word I thought that word was a big no no that second part of that word isn't that a bad isn't that like

yes it is that is a slur but that is the name of the cat a Maine Coon is a kind of cat I'm definitely not getting one of those I'd like the Maine C word please I am not a part of this part's sure uh i'd like the main c word please i uh i'm not a part of this part of the thing i'm so uh he's a black and white cat i found on the street so um he uh but yeah i told him to fetch what was he what was he fetching a little fake mouse you know

but it was like it was like one of those things where one day i was doing it and it was basically me fetching to myself like he really loves chasing after it when i throw it but he wasn't bringing it back and so for like three hours i was like he just feels like he needs to play and i was like doing stuff around the house so like for three hours i was just like throwing it and then he'd run after it and then i would get it uh after he like played with a little bit and throw it again so then the next day he brought it to me and i was like oh interesting okay and then i threw it and then he kept bringing it back every time he brought it back and i was

like he gets the concept now and i didn't have to go and get it myself anyways it was i just felt like we had a breakthrough in our relationship seven years in and uh it was nice that's really nice yeah just for for new listeners, what's the cat's name? I'm not telling you. I'm not telling them because, no, I'm not telling them. It's Louie. I met him for a long time. Was it after?

Uh-huh. Yeah. Partially. Partially the name is fun, you know? All right. And what is your blessing, Lucas? Well, I was trying to think of a really good answer for this one. And I think I came up with one, which is the word no.

And the reason why is because someone, I forget if it was like a podcast, but someone said, like, even though Donald Trump is like responsible for all of the damage he's done to the country, he is a human. And we must remember and think to ourselves, what would each of us be like if we grew up never hearing the word no. And I was like, Oh, I would be an asshole too. Like, I don't know if I would do everything that he did, but I know that I wouldn't be a good person. And so I generally started thinking, Oh, I'm so glad that I heard the word no as much as I did. And I think that I'm and I'm so thankful that other people that I like evidently were, too.

Yeah. Well, that's Lucas with a message that, you know, feel bad for Trump and we should love him and forgive him. And honestly, maybe give him a second shot at the presidency because he finally heard no one time. And maybe now he's a better person. We haven't heard for a while. Who knows? He's been kicked off social media. He understands the concept. He's going to be super empathic.

He should get on TikTok. I think he tried, but he wasn't able to. Really? I don't think he was allowed on TikTok. At least I know that. At least I think that. I don't know anything. I'm like pro it,

and then I'm also like, I am nervous just about social media in general. I'm just, I get nervous. Wouldn't it be funny? First Trump, then me for my jokes. Wouldn't it be funny if he was only allowed to do the dances?

Oh yeah. That would be great. Wouldn't it also be funny, I was just thinking, if Trump came back as like the, like unquestionably, like what he was saying and what was being put out there, was he was the most progressive,

like most progressive liberal person. And he just like completely switched personalities just to to really like fuck with us almost like a born-again christian just like i've had an awakening i had an awakening and he really does a maya copeland he like really apologizes and and so like i don't think there's any chance any like progressives or liberals would get behind him but it would just be so if he was dying if he was on his deathbed he was like yeah abortion's fine I've paid for a thousand abortions he needs to go like crazily

like he really needs to like apologize for what he did but it would just be funny to like fuck with everyone's minds if he did that just as an experiment I'm not advocating for it this is the most pro-Trump ending I've ever had on this podcast I never expected that in a million years. No, just because at some level,

it feels like he was been fucking with us the whole time. Do you know what I mean? Like just doing a weird social experiment. And that would further that. That's a thought. Any plugs? Anything you want to plug? You can follow me on social media at Lucas T. Arnold.

On all social media. You can also follow my podcast, Two Nosy Meerkats. That'snold um on all social media you can also follow my podcast two nosy meerkats um that's the handle on all social media uh lucas t arnold.com and that's it yeah you have merch i do have merch yeah yeah and it's that phrase you do what is it uh the hey goodbye it's like that yeah but i also but i also have like a couple from like sketch characters like Jenkins, like stuff about like women's clothing. I've sold like some about that.

Good for you, man. Yeah. Good for you. Russell, anything you want to plug? No, you can follow me at

RussellJDaniels at Trump.net. We have an Uncle Function show. Yes, July 9th. July 9th. Get tickets. So yeah,

so this, this will come out. It's coming out. I, I will be at, I just, I just wrote June 22nd on this paper as if I know what the fuck is supposed to be there. Come on, you know what's happening June 22nd. I will be July 4th.

I will be headlining Mohegan Sun. I'm sure I will regret it. I'm like performing at a barbecue in Connecticut. I don't need to sell tickets to that. But then I'll be headlining comics Mohegan Sun in Connecticut that night, July 4th. I thought that was August. Happy birthday, America. No, I'm headlining a weekend in August.

But I'm just doing a one-nighter. Okay, gotcha. July 4th. And I just have a feeling it'll be disastrous. Everyone will be drunk from their barbecues if they even show up. If they're even there, yeah. But just come out. Come on.

Come on. Come on. Go to Mohegan Sun, July 4th. Thank you. And I think we... Oh i gotta i gotta spin this i i really need to master this um skill uh just remember that um since on the note of voiceovers that we can record as many memories as we want uh but when we're gone we're fucking gone and guess what even those recordings those pictures those photographs every trace of your existence will one day uh melt when the sun

explodes and you truly know when your existence oh that's kind of nice will be gone i like that no that's not supposed to be comforting at all. We're all in it together. We're all going to not be remembered. We're all not in it together. We're all going to be dust together. Yeah. Like my dad's ashes. Oh, my God. Can you...

Wait. Can you do some of these impressions as we fade out? Yeah. Antrodise Clay. What's the problem here with you guys? Donald Duck. Perfect. Gandalf. Don Marco.

Wow. Cronk. Oh, wow. Great job on your podcast. Great audio. No, I see. One of my favorites. Sweating her balls out, but it's good.

Nick Offerman. Don Marco, I'm. One of my favorites. Sweating her balls off, but it's good. Nick Offerman. Marco, I'm so proud. You've come so far in your audio journey. Amazing. Michael Caine. You know what? I've had an amazing time in spite of my father's death. But you know what?

It was amazing. And seeing us out, George Takei. Oh, my. Perfect.