The Dr. Josh Axe Show - Proven Ways to Heal a Broken Heart
Episode Date: November 10, 2025Heartbreak doesn’t just hurt your emotions—it changes your body. Research shows that grief and loss can raise inflammation, weaken immunity, and even trigger a temporary heart condition known as �...��broken heart syndrome.” In this episode, Dr. Josh Axe breaks down what’s really happening inside your brain and body during heartbreak, and the proven ways to heal emotionally, physically, and spiritually. Watch The Dr. Josh Axe Show every Monday & Thursday on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@drjoshaxe 🎧 Early Access! Our podcast listeners get every episode early, and you can tune in and be a part of our exclusive listeners below → Spotify: https://bit.ly/DrJoshAxeSpotify Apple Podcast: https://apple.co/3JDvWcS Order my NEW BOOK, The Biblio Diet → https://bit.ly/4oPEP3t Watch my free training on how to naturally balance your blood sugar and reverse your symptoms →http://DrAxeDiabetesClass.com Discover practical steps you can take today to start healing your thyroid naturally → DrAxeThyroidClass.com If you’re ready to start feeling like yourself again and balance your hormones, take my free class → DrAxeHormoneClass.com Uncover what’s really going on in your body with advanced biomarker testing for hormones, thyroid, and metabolism— plus a 1-hour consultation with a Senior Health Advisor! → http://MyBloodWork.com CONNECT WITH DR. JOSH AXE Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drjoshaxe/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DrJoshAxe/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thedrjoshaxeshow/ X: https://x.com/drjoshaxe/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/joshaxe Website: http://thehealthinstitute.com Sign up for my newsletter: https://bit.ly/4oE9Jf3 Ask me a question: http://speakpipe.com/drjoshaxe DISCLAIMER This content is strictly the opinion of Dr. Josh Axe and is for informational and educational purposes only. It is not intended to provide medical advice or to take the place of medical advice or treatment from a personal physician. All viewers of this content are advised to consult their doctors or qualified health professionals regarding specific health questions. Neither Dr. Axe nor the publisher of this content takes responsibility for possible health consequences of any person or persons reading or following the information in this educational content. All viewers of this content, especially those taking prescription or over-the-counter medications, should consult their physicians before beginning any nutrition, supplement or lifestyle program. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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So if you're a person who's ever dealt with the lost of a loved one, a bad breakup,
maybe a business that you really had your heart set on didn't work out, or you lost something else,
maybe your health.
Well, today I'm going to walk you through how to heal using the wisdom of modern day science
and the Bible as well.
Welcome to the Dr. Josh Jack show.
So here's what heartbreak is.
Heartbreak is intense emotional suffering and having great sadness.
It can be caused by the end of a close relationship, the death of a love.
loved one or significant losses or disappointments in your life.
That could be career-wise.
That could be a relationship.
It could be physical health or a medical condition that's keeping you from doing what you
want to do.
I mean, I can tell you it for myself that when I was bedridden for a year about three years ago,
and so I went from, you know, being able to do triathons and deadlifting and squatting
and running around being really athletic with my young kids and then not walking for a year.
and then years of rehab and feeling like and having thoughts in my own head of,
will I ever get back to where I was?
Or, hey, will I ever be able to, you know, go out for a bike ride again?
Or, you know, play tennis or pickleball or just run around chasing my daughters
and throwing her up and there in the pool.
You know, I had those doubts in my mind.
And there was a loss there.
And I know many people have gone through many more losses than I have.
But this is something that's really dear and near to my heart.
And I wanted to do this episode on Heartbrose.
because this was been a season that I came out of walking my family members through as well.
And I want to just share with you some of the heartbreak that I went through.
And again, I know many of you have gone through heartbreak that is much, much more severe than I had.
And also thinking about my family members, my mother-in-law, my mom and other people who have had intense heartbreak as well.
But, you know, a little over three years ago, I had a spinal infection, was told I may never walk again.
And so I had a really lost therapy, like I had lost my physical health.
and that was incredibly hard.
Again, not knowing if I would ever walk normally again, be permanently disabled,
and so I lost my health, and that was a big loss.
On top of that, around that time, I lost a business that I'd built.
I'd poured my heart and soul into something for 17 years,
and I felt like I completely lost something in a business.
That was hard.
And then on top of it all, and this was the hardest thing of all,
I lost my father-in-law, who was like my best friend, my mentor, a father-old.
figure. He was living with me. And my mother-in-law was living with Chelsea and I and our girls.
We were hanging out every day together, every waking moment. He was my best friend. And he passed away
about a year and a half ago. And that was incredibly hard. And then we had two dogs we had. And they
literally died right after that time as well. And so it's like, I lost my health. I lost my best
friend and father-in-law. I lost our two dogs. We lost a business. Like there was loss after
loss after loss. And you know as well that you also feel the losses of those that you love,
seeing my wife Chelsea lose her dad only at 60 years old, seeing my mother-in-law when she went through.
And that was incredibly hard. And so that was a time just a couple years ago or the past couple
years where I've had to walk through, how do I heal a broken heart? Because there was such a great
sense of loss of my father-in-law, Joel, not being here. There was such a sense of loss of
losing part of my business. There was a loss of losing my house. There was a loss of losing my house.
even if it's for a time.
And so I want to walk you through what I've learned as I've walked through pain and loss
via as I've looked at the scientific literature,
and even more so as I've looked at the Bible in terms of how do we heal a broken heart properly?
Because one of the things I've discovered is that a lot of times we'll skip steps
and we don't mourn properly.
And a lot of people never fully recover and never fully heal from a broken heart.
And so that's what I'm going to go through today.
And my prayer for you is that this content today, and what I'm going to share with you, helps heal your broken heart, that you can share this with the other people you love.
If you know somebody that's going through a season of suffering and loss, that it can help heal their heart as well.
And here's the first thing to know, heartbreak is not just in your head.
It creates a physical and mental stress response and a cascade of things that happen throughout your body.
In fact, brain imaging studies have shown heartbreak acting.
activates the same brain regions as physical pain in the anterior cortex of the brain.
Cortisol and adrenaline surge, increasing your heart rate and blood pressure over time.
And neurotransmitters like dopamine and oxytocin especially can drop down significantly,
which can intensify the feelings of loss, of depression, of hopelessness that you're feeling as well.
Now, one of the greatest forms of loss somebody could ever have is losing their spouse.
And that's something I saw.
I've seen an experience with my mother-in-law.
And losing a spouse is considered one of the most stressful life events a person can experience.
I think really the only greater losses is losing a child.
And this is associated with a significantly increased risk of morbidity and mortality.
Several pathways link bereavement in health, including inflammation and immune dysregulation,
genetic and epigenic changes, gut microbiota changes.
All of this was found in a medical journal called The Frontiers in Psychiatry.
And research shows that for most people, the most intense grief lasts about six to 12 months,
but many continue to feel waves of grief years later.
Now, this can be for bereavement.
It could also be divorce.
It could also be an issue like, again, losing that job that you felt like was that dream
job you had or losing your health. Typically, the six to 12 months is when the grief is the
greatest, but you can have waves come and go for years later. You know, psychologists like John
Bolby and Colin Murray found that heartbreak and grief often unfold in four major phases.
Number one is numbness. At first, people feel shock, disbelief, almost like the loss isn't real.
I know my wife and I, when we lost our father-in-law, Chelsea and I, we kept saying like, for her,
it was her dad, we kept feeling like, gosh, I just feel like he's going to, you know, for months later.
I mean, really for about six months later, we just said, man, I just feel like one day we're going to wake up and he's still here.
Like, like he's going to walk down the steps and we're going to see him, you know, like almost like he's been gone on a trip.
And there's that numbness there, almost like, and this is why, you know, I've seen this happen where sometimes people will question if
how somebody is processing the loss. And unless you've actually lost a spouse or a child,
you're the only people that can actually completely, completely resonate with this.
But I've actually seen this with people questioning people who are celebrities or
well-known figures when they've lost their spouse. And people are saying, well, why aren't they
crying more and why aren't they completely broken? How are they even able to talk?
I think part of what happens there is, one, there can be a level of numbness that someone.
experiences. But also, and this is what I'll get to later, for people that are people of faith,
there is a level of being filled with the Holy Spirit and there's a hope of knowing that there's
eternity. And so, and if your spouse lived a life that was to be commended and they left behind a
great legacy and you know there was Jesus, well, that's sort of chains and shifts the way that
you see loss. You know, when we had my father-in-law's funeral, everyone didn't wear black. Some people
did, but there was a lot that we sung praise and worship music, and we honored the life he lived,
and we took joy and had a sense of peace and hope knowing that he was with Jesus in heaven.
And that if this life is like a speck of sand on an eternal timeline, we know that we'll be reunited.
And so I think that's another thing.
If you've ever questioned somebody who has lost somebody, and I saw this, by the way,
I mean, some of the comments I've seen about someone like Erica Kirk, and why isn't she
mourning more?
Well, one, in this stage of grief, oftentimes there's a great level of numbness that you feel,
but also there's the feeling of the Holy Spirit.
There's a sense of joy and hope in knowing what the future holds.
So the first thing people feel when they feel heartbreak oftentimes is a sense of numbness.
The second thing is a yearning.
Okay.
In this yearning, I think yearning is almost too soft of a word.
It's this, it is this deep sense of what if that can sometimes just wrench your heart.
And again, just thinking through and replaying the memories and what if and if things could have been different and what if we could have done something different to have helped change that future outcome, right?
But again, I think there's a sense of, and we experience.
I know in my mother-in-law, even to a greater degree, this anger, this guilt, this what-ifs,
that we've replayed over and over and over.
But again, this is the most heart-wrenching phase for most people, because the numbness is gone,
is gone, and then now you're truly feeling the sense of hurt and loss in replaying the past.
Now, the third step is this, according to psychologists, it's disorganization and despair.
As reality now has fully set in, emotions like sadness, loneliness,
and hopelessness can take over. Okay. And this is where in yearning, there's a sense of,
there, there's a sense of loss and it's, and it's, and it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's,
it's, it's, this disorganization and despair phase typically lasts longer. And this is, again,
where you have this, you, you, you're kind of now sitting in it, the sadness, the loneliness, and then,
oftentimes the hopelessness. And then the first, fourth stage is this reorganization.
eventually the pain softens, acceptance grows, and life solely finds a new rhythm.
Okay.
One of the things I've heard family members who have had who have lost somebody is oftentimes
they'll say things like like we had our entire future mapped out.
And so you have all these hopes and all these dreams for things in the future.
And I know we had this too because Chelsea and I,
we spent our, I mean, every vacation, every trip, everything we did was with my in Los
Chelsea's parents.
parents, everything.
And our daughters, our daughter, Arwen in particular, like she knew her grandparents so well, loved, I mean, I, you know, had an amazing grandpa.
And so when there was that loss, there was a sense of losing our future.
We felt like we had lost our future.
Everything we'd planned, everything, you know, we had this trip to Europe plan.
We were all going.
It was already paid for them and the whole thing.
And, and again, there was such a loss there.
And I think there was also a loss for us knowing not only did we lose something, but our kids
and also our nieces and nephews, they're losing a 10 out of 10 grandfather who was so high
in character and Christlike in nature, like losing that.
If any of you had a great grandpa, I had a great grandpa.
Live it to be 96 taught me how to fish, taught me how to work hard, I mean, a number of things,
and taught me a lot about the Lord and how to grow in character.
and how to be a man. And so for me, having that,
through my whole life, really up until I was really almost 40,
having a, that was so important to me to know that my kids won't have that.
So I say all that to say this, is that there is so much heartbreak and there's so much
complexity to the number of losses and things you can lose if you lose a loved one.
And the reality is it's incredibly hard.
But with Christ, as we'll go through, you can get through it and God can use
all things for good. So what you have to do is you have to take this future now that's lost and you
have to recreate a new future, a new vision, new goals for the future and remap that out in your mind
and that takes time. But we need to do it with a heart of hope. I think this is something the Bible
calls us to is to fix our eyes on Jesus and to focus on heaven and have an eternal focus
and focus on the good.
Now, it's important to know, as it talks about in the Bible, that Jesus wept.
He wept.
This is for Lazarus, who he raised from the dead, you know, moments later, but he wept.
And, you know, and if you want to know how to support somebody who is going through heartbreak and loss,
one of the greatest things you can do is just be there.
Just be there.
Just show up and be there.
You know, one of the things that was the most meaningful to me,
was when I lost my father-in-law was that we had people flying in from out of town.
Like I had a friend of mine, Dan Sullivan, who didn't, he didn't need to come, but he came.
He flew in when he had all kinds of other things going on.
And a really close friend of mine, Ryan Cole and his brother and family, they flew in.
Like I had people fly in that I didn't expect to and them just being there.
Not even what they said, but this, the fact that they were there and I knew they were there gave me such a level of encouragement.
I think it's also important to know that these stages of grief, and again, this could be for losing a loved one. It can also be for divorce. This is important for if you've lost a business. If you've lost a pet, if you've lost, if you've had any big loss in your life, if you lost your health, it's important to know that these stages aren't rigid and people can move back and forth between them or feel several at once as healing is rarely linear. This same process could happen for people. Here's an example. You're
diagnosed with Lyme disease or mold and you're very ill and you're very sick and you feel like
you don't know if you'll ever get out of it that's what you might feel like that I don't know if I'll ever
heal and there can be this sense of over time of just sort of depression and fatigue and loss
maybe you had a back injury and now it's like every time you do anything you've got a low back
problem or a knee issue or a shoulder issue you're wondering well ever snow ski again can I go out
and play tennis can I go out and do this thing I love to do right now listen all of us have a
choice when we have loss. We can focus on the hope in the future, or we could focus on the pain
of the past. You know, research shows that people with recent partner loss have up to a 66%
increased risk of mortality in the first six months. Okay. So, so that is, that is incredibly high.
Okay. And that's because that heartbreak can be so severe. This is actually called the window
effect as it's often seen in those who lose their spouses. And so if you have someone else who's
greatly suffering or there's a loss, if you don't focus on the hope in the future and taking
care of yourself, your risk of mortality goes up dramatically. Now, in addition, heartbreak of
any kind increases your risk of health issues. In fact, if you're going through heartbreak right
now, you have higher levels of inflammation, higher seriactive protein. This is seen in people after
relationship losses, heart disease and stroke due to increased stress hormones and damaged blood
vessels, depression and anxiety due to loss of serotonin, dopamine, and oxytocin regulation.
Also weakened immunity since high cortisol suppresses immune defenses and grief lowers natural killer
cell activity, which are part of your first line of immune defense.
Now this is also why when I have cancer patients, one of the things I always have them do is do gratitude practices and spend time singing praise and worship songs and do everything they can to build joy in their life.
In fact, I'll share this when my mom had her cancer diagnosis.
One of the things we had her do was when she would watch a show, it was only comedies.
Literally is the only thing she ever watched on TV if she was going to watch TV.
It was comedy movies because she needed to laugh.
She needed to have joy in her life.
That was important. It's important for healing. It's important for immunity.
In extreme cases, heartbreak can trigger Takasubo. Cardiomyopathy also called broken heart syndrome.
Now, this is a temporary heart condition where the left ventricle of the heart weakens and actually balloons out, which can increase the risk of a heart attack.
Studies show that about 2% of patients initially diagnosed with this suspect they're having a heart attack when it's actually this broken heart syndrome.
And it's much more common in women due to them having typically higher and lower levels of emotional fluctuations.
88% of people with broken heart syndrome are females after a sudden loss or by experiencing intense grieving.
Now, not everyone experiences heartbreak in the same way or recovers of the same pace.
For some people, the pain is sharp but fades with time for others grief lingers and even affects their long-term health.
Factors that explain why some people bounce back why other struggle include, according to this study,
a large study in the Health Psychology Journal found that people with strong social support networks
recover faster from grief and have protection against mental disorders.
Some studies show they have 40% lower levels of prolonged depressive symptoms compared to those who felt isolated.
And this really lines up with this Harvard study on longevity to where the single greatest factor in you having a long.
life is your social support. You have close friends, close family, people who love you. And also,
are you open to letting them love you and support you in your healing? Being open to it as well,
that's important, right? Because if you're going to hug somebody, both people have to open
their arms and embrace. In addition, there's coping strategies like exercise, journaling, or prayer.
These have been linked to reduce stress, hormone levels, and faster emotional recovery.
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Now, here's one of the biggest reasons why people don't recover from trauma
as quick quickly than not.
others if you have, again, lost a loved one, lost a business, lost your health, if there's
been sort of any loss or heartbreak, if you've had past trauma such as adverse childhood
experiences could be verbal abuse, sexual abuse, physical abuse, or just great poverty or loss,
some sort of extreme adverse childhood experience, those people have a harder time
with healing from trauma.
So people with unresolved childhood trauma or prior losses often find heartbreak more overwhelming
because it reactivates those old wounds, right?
It's one thing to have one injury.
But what if you have an injury and then you have two other injuries you've had in the past
on top of it, right?
Your chance of healing and recovery is more difficult.
And so what happens also in life, when you've had this early adversity, you can also
sometimes create limiting beliefs with this because it might be like, well, you had childhood
trauma and then you had more trauma, more trauma, then you have this more recent trauma. And so you might
just start to have this feeling of trauma is the way of life. Like bad things happen to you. You're a victim.
And so you can start to get in this sort of victim mentality. And when you live in a victim mentality,
you are focusing on the negative. You're focusing on the loss. You're not focusing on the positive.
You're not focusing on the future. And that makes you physically ill and slows recovery. Now, some of the
most prominent examples of early life adversity that make heartbreak worse can include
parental divorce or separation. So if you grew up in a divorced home or a single parent home,
that's an example, physical, emotional or sexual abuse, neglect such as lack of food,
safety, or emotional care, loss of a parent through death, growing up with a parent
who struggled with addiction or a personality disorder, exposure to domestic violence,
living in poverty or unstable housing, chronic illness.
You know, one study found it was actually called the Adverse Childhood Experiences
Study, and they found that two-thirds of participants had at least one adverse child experience.
And experiencing four or more hard childhood experiences increase your risk of depression by
460% and your risk of suicide by 2,000% compared to those people who didn't have
those hard childhood experiences. And this is why I feel so adamantly about encouraging my patients
and others to heal past trauma and go back and look at past childhood trauma. Because if you still have
that today, it is greatly impacting your physical health. Again, what most people do is they just
sweep it under the rug and act like it never happened. But it festeres there. It's like this. It's literally a
toxin. I mean, imagine, you know, a terrible toxin and you're drinking it or you're exposing
yourself to it every single day. It's radiation every single day. Glyphosate and
pesticides, mold, you know, Lyme disease, you know, this sort of childhood trauma, if it's never
dealt with properly and you've swept it under, it literally is festering and creating disease
just like a toxin would. It is literally toxic to your body. And so what you have to do is you need
to take that trauma. You need to bring it up into awareness and you have to work through healing
from it. Now, the way that I did this in my past, any trauma that I had is I sat down with a man that
was much older than me. And I went through and I confessed all of my sins and I brought it up and I
talked about it. I actually talked about it with somebody and said, you know what? This really bothered
me that this happened and this happened and I and then I went through a practice of forgiving the
person. I had asked for forgiveness where I needed forgiveness. I did all of these things and I said,
Jesus, listen, I pray that you will now heal my heart from the pain I've caused others,
from the people that hurt me. And I receive your healing.
you know and so but but actually doing a doing something about it and i think there's this element of one
journaling and bringing up yourself thinking about what are those thoughts that still bother you today
where do you have guilt where do you have shame where do you have hurt where do you have unforgiveness
bitterness resentment towards someone else think about those things or or bring up there's a loss there
and then working through with a professional ideally it could be a you know a christian counselor or something
like that, and then letting Jesus heal your heart. And then moving forward, and then oftentimes
using how you've been healed to help heal others can be powerful as well. But it's just important
to recognize that oftentimes people think, well, I've had this hurt or this loss. And if I simply
act like it never happened, it'll go away. But the reality is it's there. It's like a cancer growing
in your body. In fact, high A scores have been linked to higher risk, much higher risk of cancer.
heart disease, diabetes, and premature death.
So it's important that if you've had past trauma, that you go and you focus on it.
And most people don't because it hurts.
Bring back and dealing with that stuff.
It's uncomfortable.
It hurts.
Oftentimes we don't want to forgive people, but it's so critical for healing.
Now, I want to walk you through in the scientific literature, what it says in terms of some
proven ways to deal with heartbreak.
And studies show that most people experience significant improvement in heartbreak distress with the right mindset.
after three to six months.
But lingering symptoms can last longer, again, if the right things are not addressed,
and the tools below can often help.
Number one, writing and expressive journaling.
Again, you need to get it out.
You can't just stuff it down.
We need to bring it up.
This is step number one.
Now, here's a study on people that experience really hard breakups.
In the study, participants who wrote about their breakup for 20 minutes a day
had reduced depressive symptoms after three weeks.
writing about the challenging situation also helps us form meaning which assists in recovery.
So it could be a heartbreak in terms of a breakup.
Write about that challenging situation.
Write about your loss.
Right about what you're dealing with.
Just write down all your thoughts about the hardness of what you're going through.
You know, this is biblical as well.
Look at King David and his writings in the Psalms.
I mean, talk about somebody who practice expressive journaling.
I mean, he's pouring his heart out to God, and you can do that right down. God, why did you let this
happen? God, I don't know what my future looks like. God, please help. I hurt so badly, right?
Pouring out your heart before him. But again, studies have shown whether you're writing to God or
just expressing it in writing, it can help you heal a broken heart. The second point is reframing
and cognitive strategy. So reframing things. Okay, because here's what I think a lot of times
people feel. Let's talk about just a breakup first. A breakup you might start thinking about, well,
oh, this person was great because of this, this, this and this. Why didn't this let this happen?
You know, there's a great Garth Brooks song and one of the lines is one of God's greatest gifts is
unanswered prayers. Right. You ever look back and thought about, I think about this in life.
I prayed for certain things in my life.
And now I look back and I'm like, God, thank you for not answering that prayer, right?
I think in a similar way.
So there's this sort of reframing sometimes where sometimes you feel like, oh, this person
was perfect for me.
And then when you're going through a breakup.
And then you find your spouse later on and you realize, oh, wow, you know, I'm so
grateful that God led me to this person, right?
I think a lot of us have experienced that.
And of course, you know, with something like with,
losing a loved one.
I mean, you know, I think, I think reframing is more something like this where it's like
you can feel like your life's over and your future is crushed and you've lost your best
friend and you can focus on those things.
But I think there's also this, and by the way, you should mourn in that for a period of time.
But then there's a period of reframing and thinking, you know what?
God has called me to live my best life possible.
I'm here on this earth.
and I'm going to do everything I can to run my best race possible.
And reframing and saying, you know what, it's not true that my future is over.
It's not true.
I'm going to have amazing experiences.
I'm going to have great relationships.
I'm going to honor God with my life, right?
And also focus on the eternity and focus on.
And I think this is one of the things I think that I notice between when I go to the funeral of a family
that is really strongly Christian versus not,
is there's this sort of hope that's there
when you lose a loved one.
Because if you believe that this life is all there is,
and when you die, it's over.
That's very depressing.
Okay.
But for me, in my house,
we know that I'll see my father-in-law and my uncle,
and my grandfather, and my grandmother,
and all of these people that I've loved that I've lost.
I'll see them again one day in heaven.
And knowing that fills me with a sense
hope and join encouragement in knowing that reality. And that helps heal a break in heart,
heart. But reframing that, and that's one of the greatest things about the Bible, if you just
sit down and read the Bible, is it helps you reframe your perspective. So much of life, so much of
success, so much of us being the best we can be, is changing the way we view things. Again,
you could be in the room with, you know, two people can be in the room and see radically different
things. One person could be looking at all the flaws and all things.
that are wrong and another person can be sitting there seeing that one beautiful thing in the room
and it could give them encouragement, right? So again, if you're a person that's a pessimist,
if you're a person that is negative constantly, you're not helping anybody. You're hurting
yourself, you're hurting others versus if you can reframe and the Bible talks about faith,
hope, and love, right? And focusing on those things, it's a great way to reframe and give yourself hope
for the future and heal a broken heart. Now, the next thing that's been proven in science,
is social support. So building these deep meaningful friendships. This is so important. And if you don't
have that, go try and get plugged in at a church. But a lot of times, listen, you need to pursue these
relationships yourself. I think that's one of the hard things. But I know a lot of times that people
have had heartbreak and loss. They have gone to support groups. Again, oftentimes churches are a great
place to find this, but where you can really get connected to people that have maybe gone through
the same things that you've gone through. And that can be incredibly helpful for starting and
building that social connection and community. Now, a few other things that can be supportive
as you go through any type of loss, health-wise, can be exercise. This improves mood through
endorphins being released. Also boosts dopamine and norapinephrine, which supports focus
and emotional balance. A meta-analysis found that aerobic exercise reduces depressive symptoms
as effectively as antidepressant drugs.
Exercise just as effective, no side effects,
and also doesn't only help depression,
helps every medical condition that you can think of.
Antidepressants, increased risk of suicide,
all kinds of negative side effects, hard to get off of.
The choice is obvious there.
But again, exercise has been shown to be good for healing a broken heart.
Studies suggest also yoga for stress relief.
Weightlifting is great for boosts.
in confidence and motivation.
Even light aerobics, like walking in nature,
has been shown in clinical studies to support overcoming depression.
And then mindfulness and meditation has been shown to lower cortisol
and help regulate emotions.
In fact, an eight-week mindfulness program improved emotional resilience
and grieving in individuals.
I want to walk you through some very encouraging scriptures
that can help you better deal with a broken heart.
And these are things that I've,
running down personally, these are verses that I meditated on as I went through and focusing on
healing the broken heart that I had over this past season. In the first Bible verse, I want
to encourage you to meditate on is this, John 1633. This is what Jesus says. I have told you
these things so that in me you may have peace. In this world, you will have trouble, but take heart,
I have overcome the world. Jesus tells us you're going to have trouble in this life.
There's going to be loss.
There's going to be trials.
There's going to be challenges.
You're going to deal with some stuff.
But take heart.
I have overcome the world.
Take heart.
There's salvation.
There's eternity in him.
A life in heaven, a life of perfections, being reunited with your loved ones.
So meditating on that knowing Jesus made it through it even harder things than we did.
And we can make it through as well.
So Jesus acknowledges that pain and heartbreak are a part of life.
life, yet reassures us that his victory secures our peace and hope. Second Bible verse is this,
Psalms 3418, the Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
When your heart aches, you can know that God draws near to you in your suffering. I really
experience this in this loss of crying and being at a sense of loss with losing my father-in-law
and my own health and all the other losses that we had in this past season of the past couple
years, I felt and knew the Lord was near me. It's because it says in his word, he is near the broken
heart heart. And one thing I always pray for people when they're going through a hard time,
and I pray myself as well, is I say, God, would you send your Holy Spirit and wrap your loving
arms around that person? And I said, would they just feel your presence, that your arms would be
wrapped around them like a blanket that they would feel the comfort of the comforter.
And that's my prayer for you.
If you're going through a sense of going through a time of heartbreak and loss and
praying and asking that the Holy Spirit would come in you and pray and ask for that yourself
or pray that for that person that's suffering in your life.
But again, this is a good reminder, Psalms 3418, that God is close to those that are
the broken hearted.
Isaiah 61 says this, he has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the
captives, and the opening of the prison to those who are bound. Now, this is also a good reminder
to those who are suffering with addiction, to those who feel like they are maybe stuck somewhere
in life and there's a sense of loss or depression or loneliness because they don't feel like
they're going anywhere as well. Now, this is also a prophecy about
Jesus' mission to heal the broken-hearted and bring freedom to those weighed down by sorrow.
But it's very specific here.
It even uses the word broken-hearted.
Jesus was sent to bind up the broken-hearted.
And so I would encourage you, let Jesus heal your heart.
There's a great book I love by Philip Yancey.
And it's called The Jesus That I Never Knew.
And I want to encourage you to get that book if you don't know who Jesus is.
And if you have a broken heart and you want to know how to experience him.
Again, Philip Yancey, the Jesus that I never knew.
You can get it on Amazon.com.
And it's a great book to check out as you're focusing on healing.
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Matthew 1128 through 29 says this.
Come to me all of you who are weary and burdened.
and I will give you rest.
Take my yoke upon you and learn from me,
for I am gentle and humble and heart,
and you will find rest for your souls.
And so Christ says, listen,
and right now a lot of times when there's a loss,
there's also this sense of like a heavy burden on you.
By the way, I experienced this with my loved ones
who, when they went through a sense of loss,
like my mom lost her brother and both her parents here,
and her brother was really young, like late 50s,
and that was her best friend, her only sibling.
And so I walked with her through this.
But really three years ago, this happened.
And one of the things that was so heavy for my mom was she just lost a brother
and then she lost her parents.
And then all of the things she had to go through legally, you know, financially and all
of those same things, there's a heaviness there.
And Jesus says, hey, give it to him.
Now, here's the thing I want to remind somebody of, though.
You have to give it to him.
You have to give them the burden.
Oftentimes, we just keep carrying it ourselves.
You know, one thing that I always want people to do when they're suffering around me is I want to help carry the burden.
If you have a good community around you of good people, they should want to help you carry the burden.
And you should ask them to for a period of time, right?
So a lot of times people, like my wife is like this, by the way, she doesn't want to put anybody out.
And so she just will take it all upon herself versus saying, you know what?
I know that it's biblical.
One thing to think about as we sort of reframe this perspective is if you're going through
something hard in life, if by keeping it to yourself and not allowing someone else to carry
the burden with you, you're robbing that person of an opportunity to be like Christ and to do a
good work and to help you.
And you're even losing an opportunity to grow closer to that person.
So there's this metaphor of this person that is in the middle of a flood.
And they climb all the way off onto the rooftop.
and they say, God, would you please save me?
And a few minutes later, somebody comes along with a boat.
And he says, hey, jump in.
And he said, hey, I'm sorry, I'm waiting for God to save me.
He said he would save me.
And the boat driver went off.
And then a helicopter comes a few minutes later.
And the helicopter says, get in.
I'm here to rescue you.
And he says, no, listen, I'm waiting for God to save me.
And the person drowns.
And they get up to heaven.
And they said, God, why didn't you save me?
And he said, listen.
I sent a boat, I sent a helicopter, you know, what more do you want?
So again, you know, I found that one, you've got to pray and ask for it.
God, will you heal me?
God, will you help me?
And then you need to be on the lookout and ready for the things that he's doing, okay,
in order to heal and unload that burden you're experiencing.
Psalms 147 says this.
He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds, right?
very, very similar.
We know he is our healer.
And so, and part of the way that I did this, like when I had my back issue and I,
the sense of losing my health completely, I would just sit there and pray and know and say,
God, I would say, buy your stripes, I am healed.
And I would just reflect on the fact that God said he would heal me.
And I would visualize and see my entire self healing and myself running again, myself,
swimming again, myself throwing my daughters in the air again.
I would see that.
And I would see Jesus dying for me and his blood.
and blood being spilled, his body broken.
I'd even take communion sometimes and accept that healing happening in my body.
Romans 828 says this, and we know that in all things God works for good of those who love him,
who have been called according to his purpose.
This is really hard for some people, but I'm going to encourage you with this.
When I was going through my back issues, when I was going through the loss of my father-in-law,
I'll give you examples as this with my back.
I said, okay, how can I use this for good?
How can I show my daughters how to bear my suffering nobly?
When you're going through hard times, how we should act.
Okay, when we're going through hard times, what do we do?
We pray.
We ask for help.
We stay in a state of thankfulness and praise and gratitude.
And so there's that.
And also I ask God, I said, as I go through this, would you refine me?
Would you help me grow spiritually?
Would you help me grow more mentally strong?
and so I had asked God to use these different areas of my suffering for good.
And we know James talks about that.
He says, take joy brothers when you face trials of many kinds because the testing of your faith
develops perseverance in character and that gives you hope.
So he says this in his word.
And then I even thought about this.
And this was the hardest thing.
I tried to think about, okay, I lost my best friend.
I lost my father.
Like, how could that ever be used for good?
And I just really tried to think about, you know what?
I kept trying to think about how, like my father-in-law had a greater servant's heart than I had.
And so I kept thinking, you know what, I'm going to try and have a more servant's heart like he had.
I'm going to try and be that person who's constantly in every way possible, every moment looking,
how can I serve?
And so, again, you know, really meditating and thinking on how can God, now, of course, and I saw
this with my mom experiencing cancer.
That was such a hard time, but thinking, God, how can this be used for good?
And it was used for good.
God can use all things for good.
Final verse here I want to encourage you with to help heal a broken heart.
Revelation 214 says this, and he will wipe away every tear from their eyes.
There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain.
For the old order of things has passed away.
And we know a few verses later it talks about that we will live in heaven.
He's gone to prepare a place for us.
and a heavenly city and a garden city that will be here again on earth.
And knowing that future, that final promise of complete healing and complete perfection
with our loved ones one day.
And so fixing our eyes on that reality and truth gives us great joy, great encouragement
as we go through heartbreak.
Now, I want to get into some more practical, physical health things that can then impact
our mental and spiritual health.
Okay. Practices like breath work can be really, really powerful. So that's taking a deep breath in,
holding for a couple of seconds and breathing out. But focusing on your breath actually gets you into a
parasympathetic state, which allows your body to heal, get you out of this sort of fight or flight state
that can be so stressful and so damaging to your body. Another critically important part of healing a broken heart and your body is sleep.
Okay, sleep is critical.
One night of sleep deprivation reduces emotional regulation by up to 60% in the amygdala in the brain.
Sleep deprivation can also exacerbate preexisting conditions such as anger, depression, anxiety,
and can even lead to fatigue poor decision making.
And so sleep is very, very important.
So do everything you can to prioritize good sleep.
Nutrition also matters.
You know, a diet rich in healthy fats, protein.
vegetables, nuts and seeds, wild caught fish, is linked to a 30% lower risk of depression.
Here's another big one, music therapy.
This has been proven to improve mood and decrease rumination.
So rumination, these kind of recycling negative thoughts in your brain.
For example, in older people with dementia music can trigger memories, improve socialization,
and improve quality of life.
So again, this is where for me singing Christian praise and worship music and just having
that on repeat and really thinking about the,
the words, really sing those words out, can be so incredibly healing.
Volunteering in acts of service.
Helping others reduces loneliness, increases oxytocin, which can help heal social pain.
You know, when I was in junior high, I read a book called The Hiding Place.
It was about Corey Tinboom, who was a Christian woman who helped save many, many Jews during
the Holocaust.
And it's amazing book.
I actually went back and read it when I was going through my spinal issues.
This was about two and a half years ago.
I went and re-listened to the book.
And I was blown away.
So she was put in herself.
She was put in a concentration camp.
So was her father.
So was her best friend who is her sister.
And many of her other loved ones.
They were all thrown in a concentration camp.
And she was the only one that survived.
Her dad died.
Her sister died.
And she later,
was released.
And she went on to forgive all of these people that killed her family members who tortured her.
And she went on to have a ministry for many, many years later.
And this was acts of service.
Really, she focused on, I want to help other people heal their pain and spreading the message of Jesus.
Really, it's an amazing book.
Again, it's called The Hiding Place, which I encourage you to read by Corey.
10 Boom. And there's another great book that you could read in Campany. By the way, these are pretty
short books. Another great book is Man Search for Meaning by Victor Frankel. Reading those two books,
I would encourage all of you to read those books as well. They're incredibly healing, I think,
in us thinking about how can we go through suffering and then use our gifts to help others.
Now, there are also some supplements that have been shown clinically to improve our overall health,
but specifically for our brain and for symptoms such as depression.
One of my favorites is aschwaganda.
Now, there is a type of aschwaganda called KSM 66 that can help lower cortisol and support
resilience and overall support depressive symptoms.
Rodeola rosea is another one that's good for fatigue and depressive symptoms.
Omega-3 fatty acids doing about 1,000 to 2,000 milligrams of EPA and DHA daily from something
like a fish oil or cod liver oil can be really, really great, especially with combined with
vitamin D. Another herb I love, I was recently on Dr. Daniel Amon's podcast, we talked about this one a little bit.
This is also reference in the Bible. Saffron. Clinical studies show Saffron can work as effectively
as SSRIs for mild to moderate depression. It's been shown to lower anxiety and depression,
help with mood regulation, focus, and it has no side effects. So Saffron is.
is wonderful as well. And then magnesium creates relaxation, is great for your body's stress response.
Elthianine is another good one. But those are some of the best when it comes to healing a broken heart.
And what I would encourage you to do, if you're dealing with a broken heart, maybe you lost a spouse,
maybe you went through a bad breakup, maybe it was a divorce, maybe you've dealt with a health issue,
or just have a sense of a lot of loss in your life or maybe past childhood trauma.
I want to encourage you to spend some time after this show and think about what is it that
you can do and really make it a priority. Go back and deal with the childhood trauma. Take those Bible
verses and start meditating on them every day. Maybe just, hey, right when you wake up, maybe you,
you print them out and you tape them to your bathroom mirror and you say them every single morning
for a period of time. Maybe when you're brushing your teeth every morning before you, right when you
wake up and before you go to bed at night, you just, you say those Bible verses. That would be powerful.
Reading a couple of those books, I recommend it, taking a few of the supplements. But doing that
together, putting together protocol for yourself for healing, and then also working with a counselor
to work through these things. I think somebody that has the right perspective of faith and hope
and that Christian faith, finding something that's really good in that is important as well.
You know, a broken heart can feel, it can feel unbearable, but the thing you need to know is
it's not permanent. Your body and brain are wired to heal, especially when you have the
right support of community and the right foods and the right practices. And you don't have to numb the
pain. You can transform it and it can be used for good. God can transform it and use it for good.
And so I want to encourage you take one small step today. Go for a walk, try and connect with a
friend. Try journaling. You know, improve your diet. Get more of those omega-3s in your diet.
Do some of those things to start to heal a broken heart and know that I'm praying for your
complete healing and restoration. I want to say thanks so much for
tuning in here to the Dr. Joshak show where each and every week we're diving deep into the science
and principles of how you can heal physically, mentally and spiritually. Hey, make sure to subscribe,
by the way, it's the number one thing you can do to support the show. You know, we've had some
of the shows who, who, who, who, that don't necessarily pop in your feed because they're shadow
ban because we talk about a lot of controversial things on the show, especially when we talk about
things like cancer or, you know, a lot of what's going on in the government or big pharmaceutical
companies. A lot of times those get shadow banned. So if you subscribe, though, they'll always show
up in your feet and you can know and watch them. Also make sure to like and share. So many people
have been through so much loss and they don't really know how to navigate and help heal themselves
naturally. So I hope this can be encouraged it to them. So thank you all of you who are on
mission with me, who are sharing this as well. I'll see you on the next episode.
