The Dr Louise Newson Podcast - 19 - Your Peri Godmother: Shelly Horton on surviving and thriving through perimenopause

Episode Date: August 5, 2025

Dr Louise Newson sits down this week with Shelly Horton, an Australian journalist, broadcaster and passionate advocate for menopause awareness. Shelly recently released her debut book, I’m Your Peri Godmother: A happily-ever-after guide to kicking perimenopause in the ovaries, reflecting just how many women are desperate for relatable, honest guidance through perimenopause.In this warm conversation, Shelly opens up about her own personal experience after initially being misdiagnosed, struggling with anxiety, brain fog, heavy bleeding and exhaustion –  all whilst trying to maintain a cheerful public persona on live TV.She also shares how receiving the right support inspired her to write a book to help other women feel seen, heard, and empowered.Shelly and Dr Louise discuss the importance of education, open conversation, and compassionate healthcare and why no woman should suffer in silence or alone.An inspiring episode for anyone navigating hormonal changes or supporting someone who is.We hope you are enjoying season two of the Dr Louise Newson Podcast! Share your thoughts with us on the feedback form here and if you enjoyed today's episode, don't forget to leave a 5-star rating on your podcast platform.We’re delighted to have been nominated in the Listeners’ Choice category for the British Podcast Awards. There’s still time to vote - ⁠click here⁠ Email [e-mail] with suggestions for new guests! DisclaimerThe information provided in this podcast is for informational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health providers with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. The views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of Dr Louise Newson or the Newson Health Group.  LET'S CONNECT!Dr Louise Newson:Website: Dr Louise NewsonInstagram: The Dr Louise Newson Podcast  @drlouisenewsonpodcast) • Instagram photos and videosLinkedIn: Louise Newson | LinkedInYouTube: Dr Louise Newson - YouTubeShelly Horton: Instagram: Shelly Horton (@shellyhorton1) • Instagram photos and videosLinkedIn: Shelly Horton | LinkedInBook available on Amazon here: I’m Your Peri Godmother: A happily-ever-after guide to kicking perimenopause in the ovaries 

I really want you to help because we've found out that this podcast has been nominated for the Listeners' Choice Award, which is with the British Podcast Awards. We need your vote, so if you go to the show notes and click on the link, and I really hope we can do this, so thank you. Shelley Horton is the guest on my podcast today. She's a TV presenter, a journalist and an author, and I've known her for a couple of years. She's really open about her perimenopause journey and how she's. she thought she was better when she wasn't really. And how now she's really inspiring so many people to take control of their hormones and to look forward to the future

with a renewed positivity and extra health as well. So enjoy it. So Shelley, this is really exciting to have you remotely in the podcast studio. I feel like you're here with me. You've met everyone here, my daughter's here. So it's all happening. You've put your makeup on on a Friday night.

So that's Friday night. I need everyone to realize that it is, in Australia, it is 9.30 on a Friday night. And the last time I put on makeup at that time of night, I think was a decade ago. So this is what I'm doing for you, Louise. I am very impressed. So we first met, it's probably nearly two years ago now, isn't it? I came over to Australia with Rebecca Lewis and we came to a big conference that Professor Jerezhi Kulkani, who we We both know in love.

It was a first conference, and I was one of the guest speakers, and you were the compare. I didn't really know you then, and you just did the most amazing job. Your energy was just incredible. But what you've done over the last two years is you've learnt more. Your journey has changed. But also the people that you've connected with the stories that you've heard,

you've just become more kick-ass, really, because you're like me. You're frustrated for the women that are. suffering. You want to help. And actually we can all help together. There's enough space for everybody in these conversations. And then obviously I saw you more recently when we did this incredible event at Sydney Opera House, which we can talk about. And, and, you know, I don't know how you've managed to have time, but you've also written a book, which has just come out as well. So yes, I'm your peri godmother. So, yeah, I've been pretty busy. But I've got to tell you from when

we first met two years ago, I was still pretending I was okay, but I wasn't really. I remember you giving me a cuddle at lunchtime because I was having hot flushes, I was bleeding excessively, I was struggling with my depression, but I'd still get up on stage and perform and then come back. And I think a lot of women do that. And I now am pulling back that mask and letting people actually read in my book what was going on so that they can be more forewarned. And also just to break the shame and stigma around it. I don't think I could have written the book if I wasn't feeling well like I am now.

I think you have to process it and get through it first. But I've got to say, I'm nearly 52 now and I am feeling the healthiest I have in probably seven or eight years. It's pretty amazing. That's so cool because I'm pretty good thing to say, yeah, it's so good because I'm very perceptive, you know, with being a doctor for many years, I can pick up on nonverbal cues as well. And I often can see people in ways that others don't. And I knew you were struggling, although you weren't admitting it publicly. And that happens to a lot of people because you think that's as good as I'm going to get. You know, you hear all these stories.

you're worried maybe about whether hormones are the right thing and if you're on hormones, a lot of people are told, well, you're on hormones, therefore it can't be related to your hormones. Of course, people aren't always on the right dose or type of hormones. But it's very difficult to know. And this has been part of the problem, actually, for decades, because if we just think about flushes and sweats,

I can monitor those as a researcher. I can see you're having the sweats. I can see you having the flush. and that's why it's been denigrated backs of flushes and sweats almost because it's easy for researchers to see. How easy or difficult is it to say, I'm just really really flat and I think I might fall in, you know, burst into tears? It's not so easy, is it, to monitor that?

And actually, is that just because you've had an argument with your partner or is it because you're nervous, you're on a stage or is it your hormones? And no one can even tell you that. So that's why so often those symptoms that you can't monitor and C are just ignored, and it's blamed on us as women, really, that we're just not coping very well. I went into perimenopause and I had never heard the word before. So I'd heard menopause. So I thought that was grey-haired old ladies clutching their pearls.

Their period stopped and they got hot flushes. That's it. I had no idea there were other symptoms. And so when I started getting these other symptoms, I just put it down to stress. You know, I was having heart palpitations. I thought that was just anxiety. I had put on some weight. And I went into perimenopause in 2020.

Don't ever have a pandemic and go into perimenopause. Those two peas should never be seen together. But I put on a bit of weight and I felt hotter all the time. So as well as those traditional hot flushes that you see in movies where just like, you know, the sweat runs off you. I was just running like three degrees hotter all the time. And I just blame my weight. And I just feel like it's important for people like me to speak out and speak out loudly because if I'd had other people speaking out,

then maybe I wouldn't have written off my symptoms as just stress or just me or I've done this to myself. And I also think, I mean, I was never afraid of hormones. I was just didn't know that I needed them. So the first doctor I went to, the reason I went was I had a marina. I wanted to marry my marina, you know, the IUD. But basically I had terrible periods since I was 11. And the marina meant that I didn't have periods. And so I had had 12 years because I'd had it replaced a couple of times of no periods.

And then all of a sudden, what I describe as an Armageddon period, Like I flooded through my clothes. It was just horrendous. And that's why I went to the doctor. But I went to a female doctor. I was 45. She did not clock that it was perimenopause. She sent me off for an internal ultrasound saying this sort of abnormal bleeding could be cancer.

So that was the first thing that was in my head. And then she said, we'll do a blood test to test your hormones, which we now know are completely useless. And so then I had all the stress of waiting for those results. to come back and then I went in there. She's like, great news. It's not cancer. You're just not managing a stress well. Maybe you should take up a hobby. And so because that was my first connection with a medical professional about my symptoms, I just went away blaming myself. And that meant that I just spiraled and my symptoms got worse and worse. And I got to the point where I was crying every day.

Now, I am known on TV in Australia as that bubbly, you know, redhead and lots of energy. And I would still do my segments on TV, but I would be so drained afterwards that I would have to go to bed for the rest of the day. I got to the point where I wanted to quit my job. And I think that was when it was alarm bells because I love my job. I love what I do. But when I got to the point of going, something has to give. and I think it has to be my job. I just don't think I can handle doing live TV anymore.

So that was when my husband sat me down and said the kindest thing I ever think he has ever said to me. And he just said, I don't think there's anything wrong with you, but I think there might be something wrong with the chemicals in your brain. Why don't we go and see someone together? Isn't that amazing? So he came to the appointment with me and that's when I saw a GP who did have menopause training

who just went, oh, this is perin menopause. But of course, even then, this is 2020. She put me on an antidepressant and HRT. And then I had to try like about four different HRTs. So like, you know, you got to kiss a few HRT frogs before you find your prints. And then I remember meeting you and I was on patches at that stage. And I remember our. At lunchtime, I was, you know, I was a sweaty, bleeding mess, and I pulled my shirt up to show you

my patch. And my skin was all red raw, and the patch was peeling off. And you're like, you're not absorbing any of that. You need to go to the gel or you need, you know, like, you need to try. And I was just like, oh, I didn't, I didn't even know that. So then I changed the gel and I found my prints. And now I'm very, very happy. But again, I needed higher doses.

And I'm so lucky because I got to be treated by Professor J. Shri Kalkhani, who is an earth angel. And she was the one who asked me to have my marina removed so that my depression could be treated purely with hormones and with talk therapy with her. She weaned me off the antidepressants, which was terrifying. And it was the best thing that ever happened for me. Not only do I want to share that there are some very dark times. for, you know, one in three women in perimenopause, but also that there's not really a quick fix.

I felt like HRT would fix me in a couple of weeks, and it didn't. But you persevere, you find the right one, and then you hit the jackpot, and all of a sudden it really works. And you do the work. Like I had to make some lifestyle changes. I had to do therapy. I had to, you know, really take some responsibility. And I think now I'm actually excited about making those changes rather than resenting it,

which is I think this is how I want to sort of reframe midlife. It's like this is our opportunity to get well for the next 30 or 40 years. Absolutely. And I do feel we have the responsibility as women who are menopausal or perimenopausal to invest in our future health. But you're absolutely right. And it's funny or not funny really. about 10 years ago, I was sitting in a professor's clinic learning more about menopause.

And I remember sitting and saying to him, how do you know when someone's perimenopaus? Like, it's so obvious when they're menopaus or if they've not had a bleed, a period for a year. And he goes, oh, Louise, it's really obvious. And I went home and I was thinking, oh, I wonder how many patients I've, like, not picked it up on. And then personally, for the next six months, I was having every single perimenopausal symptom, but I didn't join the dots because this is even more embarrassing. I was writing my website. I was writing about the joint pain, the migraines,

the irritability, the anger, the low mood, the sleeplessness. And I was having all those symptoms, but thought it was just because I couldn't cope because I've got three children and I was busy and my job was getting busier. My husband was just like, oh, you're so miserable. And of course I was. And I was very close to ending my job because my memory wasn't there. I could not remember anything. And then I really struggled to find a doctor who could,

could help and listen and prescribe. And then I thought, oh, I'm going to come back really quickly. And my mother-in-law, who's on HRT, was going to, oh, you're feeling better. I was like, no, I'm not. I feel really awful. And I had to have my dose changed. And then I started testosterone. And then I waited. But it's what I found, and I know women do even for a longer period of time than me, for those six months, I'd really let my exercise slip. I'd, you know, I could. You know, I could, couldn't be bothered to do yoga. I had no motivation. I wasn't eating as well.

You know, so it's all these things together. And it's really easy when you read something that says, oh, these people need to improve their exercise. They need to improve their diet. Yeah, sure. But give us our hormones first. And then we'll feel better. And then we can do all that, you know?

You might have the energy to do it. Yes. Well, I am, my bleeding got so bad. that last two, you know, it was actually the year I met you, that was the year that I bled for 42 weeks out of 52. And I was so drained, so exhausted, anemic, all of that. And then I went in for an ablation, which ended up being the best thing I've ever done because I have not bled since. However, me being me, there were complications and I ended up in the ICU. Of course. I mean, nothing simpler with me. However, that was the real wake-up call for me where I'm like,

I need to make some changes. And one thing I decided to do was that I would walk every morning. Now, I'm not going to lose weight walking. That is not actually the goal. It was for my mental health. And sometimes, and I don't know if you've seen it on, it's often on. It's often on Instagram is like, I'm going for a stupid walk for my stupid mental health. And I do that. And I'm grumpy. And then I get home and I feel better. I'm like, oh, damn, it worked. I was like every time. But I feel like by making that commitment and I've now, yeah, so I've now done it for nearly 18 months. Amazing. And I know now, having, you know, done the research for my book, it's not just the walk. It's the fact that I'm going to bed earlier because I want to get up early and do a walk. It's

because I'm getting some sunlight in the morning. I was vitamin D deficient. And I live in Australia. And I just put on, I'd slip, slap, slap too much. Like, I had to get a bit more sunlight. The walking, and I live on the Gold Coast in Queensland. So I walk by the sea.

Like, it's just, there are so many more benefits. But I think I was in that mindset of everything will be better if I'm skinny. You know, if I just lose some weight, I'll be fine. Once I took that pressure off of like, I've got to lose weight. and I need to do burn calories. If I'm spending time exercise, I really need to be burning calories. Things change for me. And I just developed a much healthier mindset.

And then very controversially, because I didn't think I would ever do it, but I have started strength training. And I am so proud of myself. I only go twice a week, but I love it now. And I now can do a dead hang for 40 seconds, which I am. I'm so proud of. That is very good.

I could only do one second. I would just fall. So just watching yourself. I was showing my husband that I can do nearly a minute. And then he comes along and he's got the weights tied around his waist. And then he's doing these chin ups. And I'm like, oh my God. I know.

Forget it. I'll never do that. But you've got to start. And I think you're absolutely right. You know, I tend to do yoga nearly every morning. And this morning I was like, oh, I really, and I was up. And actually, I was up a bit earlier because I woke up earlier. So I did 30 minutes instead of 20 minutes.

And at the beginning, I felt like Tin Man, I felt very stiff. And at the end, when I do a headstand, I'm like, yeah, bring it on. I can conquer the world. I think for your family, if Louise is not doing a headstand, that's a sign that something's wrong. It is. You're absolutely right. You're absolutely right, actually. It's like, honestly, it's one of my things that I do.

I do it because I know lots of people can't. do it actually and that's like a no so and also like I'm older now so if I stopped doing it for a few weeks I worry that I'll never be able to do it so but it's getting into your routine

and you know there's this whole thing out everywhere actually in Australia but also in the UK that you either take hormones or you don't and if you don't you do all this other things whereas I'm very much whether you take hormones or not you still have to

exercise, you still have to eat well, you still have to look after yourself. And actually, we need to stop this binary message, really, that it's, you know, one or the other, because I don't agree with that. Absolutely. I agree with you. And that is a bit of a message that is happening in Australia, that if you want a natural perimenopause, then you just make lifestyle changes. And I'm like, no, no, no, no. You have your HRT and it's compulsory to make lifestyle changes. It's not an an add-on or one or the other, it has to be done both of them. And I feel, I just get so cranky when people go, oh, I hate big farmer or I don't want to put chemicals in my body.

And I'm like, oh, my goodness, this is just replacing your hormones that you're depleted of. And to me, I just know how well I feel now. And there's no way I would go back to 2020, Shelly. There is no way I would ever risk my mental health again. So I'm like super protective of my mental health. And I hope that by sharing my story, maybe some women who are thinking they'll go through it naturally might go, well, I can do both and understand that the benefits outweigh the risks.

And for me, the risk for me was that if I didn't take these hormones, then I may not be here anymore and that's how serious it was for me. So I don't want other women soldering through or pushing through because they don't want to take HRT when really it's, you wouldn't say don't put a plaster cast on your leg if it was broken. Absolutely. And one of the things that, you know, keeps me going is, is wanting to make a difference to as many women as possible and giving them the knowledge so they can make choices. But it's about the mental health aspect. It really is. And it's become so stupid, actually, that we're talking about the risks, do we, don't we? Look at the risks of antidepressants.

They're far higher than the risks of body identical hormones. Yet in Australia and the UK, more perimenopausal and menopause of women are prescribed antidepressants than they are HRT. Now, it doesn't make sense, actually. We've got studies showing that women who take antidepressants with hormones actually do better than if they're on their own. And we just produced some work looking at the effects of testosterone on mental health. And what was interesting is those women who were already on an antidepressant actually didn't do as well in their symptoms than those that weren't on antidepressants. And is that because the antidepressants are blocking some of the or changing really the way that the neurotransmitters are working in the brain

that means that it's harder for the hormones to affect those neurotransmitters like we do? No, the research hasn't been done. But we shouldn't just be paralyzing people's minds by giving them antidepressants if it's related to their hormones. I also, when I went on the antidepressants, I put on 10 kilos. Yeah. And that in itself has such a negative health impact. And I didn't, the doctor didn't talk through all of the pros and cons about the antidepressant, but spent a lot of time about the problem.

frozen cons on the HRT. Yeah. So I'm just like, that doesn't make sense to me. I also, my libido just flatlined on anything. Of course it does. And that's a really common, really common side effect. No one talked to me about that though. So it was just like, it was almost like, well, you have to put up with that if you want your

brain to be okay. And it's just like, I actually deserve a lot better than this. So yes, that's where I was lucky that, that Jay Sri. And she, we weaned me off the antidepressants very slowly. and removed my marina and then upped my HRT at the same time. So it was an absolute dance that was very delicate. And I was so lucky because Jay Shri was also in constant contact with my GP. And to have those with them, I said, what I loved about that is I felt like I had a team behind me

and that they cared about me, not just in out, here's a script, see you later. I was treated as a whole person. Which is what it should be. We spend a lot of time deprescribing. So, you know, reducing and stopping antidepressants, antipsychotics, gabapentin, bragavelin, you know, painkillers. It's really rewarding, but we do it very gradually. And, you know, and the patient is central to those decision-making processes.

So when I was in Sydney, I, like, honestly, it's a pinch me moment, thinking that we were back there, you know, trying to, warm up our voices, dancing and singing to pink pony club. We were singing pink pony club at the opera house before we walked on stage. It was an absolute bucket list moment. Well, it was really funny because my daughters tried to teach me the words and I did it for my theatre tour, 34 dates and I still can't remember all the words. And some of the Americans with us were like, oh my goodness, what's going on? And we carried on until the end. We carried on.

We were reading the lyrics off my iPhone, and my husband filmed it. And what I didn't realize when he first put it up is he had put the actual voice over it. So we sounded great. And then he came in the vision of us. Oh, we sounded like squeaky cats. It wasn't great. But you know what it was? It was joyful.

It was. Well, you can't sing that song and not be happy, you see. I agree. So it got us going and we had the most amazing time. Honestly, the stage the audience were incredible. We had a standing ovation. It was really inspirational. But to me, the best and the saddest moment was actually when I was leaving.

I was walking out and people recognised me and they came up and they took selfies. But there were quite a few women who came up trembling and crying and saying, you have saved my life with your podcast, with balance app. without that I would not be here and they'd travel for miles and isn't it lovely but isn't it sad Shelley that they shouldn't actually be having to struggle listening to a doctor in the UK

the other side of the world about some basic physiology talking about hormones in the brain but it's allowing women to be advocates for themselves to stand up but not just for them for their partners like your husband help you And this is where like your work and your book and your reach, we've got to like work together to amplify this noise so we can help more people.

Well, one of the people crying in the audience at the Sydney Opera House was my mum. Oh, she's so lovely. He's such a sweetheart. I know you had your mum on your podcast, which I love. My mum's 76 and she went into medical menopause at about 34. and she was on HRT doing really well. And then the WHOI study came out and they just ripped the hormones off her. And she was still having severe hot flushes at 76.

And so it was because of the opera house and listening to everyone there that she went back and she advocated for herself to her doctor and she's now taking some HRT. And she's not having hot flushes anymore. That's amazing. That's so cool. And of course the doctor was very nervous about it. And she was just like, my daughter's written a book. I've been listening to these people. I want to make the decision here.

And she's feeling well. But you know the other thing that I find really interesting talking to her about her is there's a bit of grief in the 35 years that she has put up with this. And also her generation. they just didn't talk about it. They soldiered on. I say in the book, I used to be mad at my mum for not warning me,

but now I'm mad for her, that she was treated so shabbily, that she was never given the language to discuss how she was feeling and that she was taught to silence everything. So in a weird way, that opera house moment, which was bucket list for me, has become an incredible,

indelible moment in my mum and I and our history so that we have had this incredible bonding. It's a little bit of trauma bonding, but it's bonding. Yeah. And it's amazing, but I hear it a loss in my clinic. And in fact, someone recently, it's a sad story, she's a great young lady. She's in her late 30s, early 40s now, but she's had PMDD, you know, premenstrual dysphoria disorder for a long time. and then became perimenopausal.

It was given the wrong hormones by the wrong people, a lot of synthetic hormones. And she actually came to us. We didn't know she'd already planned how to take her life, actually, because she was so depressed. Anyway, within literally days for her, it worked very quickly, having some natural progesterone, actually, as a pezzary. She's feeling great, and she's continued to do better.

And I was recording something with her recently. And she said, but then I feel, so sad because I made different choices about my job. I've made different choices about my relationship. I don't think, I didn't even want to have children because I wasn't responsible to look after them the way my mental health was. So I hear it a lot when people just really struggle because now they're better, which is wonderful, they're looking back like your mom and thinking, what could be different? But, you know, I always say to people, you can glance back and look forward. You know, we can't change the past. And what we can do, and I think.

think what we're trying to do is actually shape the future for millions of women, hopefully, with all the work that we're doing, the knowledge that we have, the experiences that we have, we're sharing. And people can choose to learn from them or they can choose to be annoyed and ignore us. It doesn't matter either way. But I know that we're helping people. Yeah, absolutely. And I feel quite excited about younger generations because they're not embarrassed about

talking about periods. They're not, like they, I think they're going to have a very liberal. rate a time. I feel like it's this gen X that I'm in that have like, we are fighting and shouting, but we're getting friction from from all sides. I do see. And actually just very pretty, it's interesting. My 22 year old daughter is usually has patches for her PMDD, Easter dial patches, but she's found them very hard to stick in the heat. It's very hot over here. And she's actually in Florence where it's really hot. And so she said to the teacher yesterday, I'm sorry, I'm a bit slow.

I've just changed the type of hormones that I'm taking because the patches weren't sticking. And she called her to one side and said, I don't think that's appropriate for you to be talking like this. Like, yeah, well, I just think it might hold you back if you start to talk like that in your career. And it's like, hang on. Oh, my God.

No, no, no, no. You can't do that. You can't do that. I'm sorry. Precisely. So, yeah, and this is the new generation. It's so important. Yeah.

So I'm super excited for your book. I'm so grateful. that you're in the podcast, but I want you to come over to UK and actually you've got to come over. Yeah, for sure. So, but before we end, Shelley, I just want to us for three tips. Three things that you want others to learn from in a quick way, like whether it's person suffering, their friend, their neighbour, their relative, you know, what three things do you think they can do that's going to make a difference to their future? I would almost cheat and say all three are the same.

Educate, educate, educate, educate. Learn about it. I think lean into the algorithm. My social media is nothing but menopause. It has learned what I want and I am following my favorite experts, including yourself. And I just love getting the up-to-date studies, learning, going for the evidence-based information, looking at the science. So lean into that. And then the other thing is talk to everyone.

So normalize having conversations about perimenopause and menopause, take away that shame and stigma. And then my final thing would be just be kind to yourself. It is a rough time for a lot of people. I was particularly hard on myself. And if I could go back, I'd probably give myself a bit of a cuddle and go, you didn't know what you didn't know. And now you've made some changes and it's really working. it'll all be okay. Yeah, absolutely.

It is a journey, but it should be a journey to good transformation and feeling better as well. So I'm so grateful. Thank you so much. You can go and take your makeup off and go to bed. I didn't take it off.

Yay! Come on. Thank you. I know, I'm so excited. I know, I can't believe makeup. I've had it on for a total of half an hour, and now I'm taking it off again. Thank you so much.