The Dr Louise Newson Podcast - 58 – ADHD and the gap in hormone care for women

Episode Date: April 16, 2026

What happens when a woman is finally diagnosed with ADHD, only to be blindsided by perimenopause making everything harder?In this episode, Dr Louise Newson is joined by Sarah-Jane Ayers for a powerful and deeply personal conversation about ADHD, perimenopause and the devastating impact hormonal changes can have on mental health.Sarah-Jane shares her experience of feeling dismissed, desperate and unable to cope, before finally finding the right support and treatment. Together, she and Louise explore why women with ADHD are so often overlooked in hormone care, whysymptoms are frequently misunderstood and how too many are being left to struggle alone.​​We hope you love the podcast! If you enjoyed today's episode, don't forget to leave a 5-star ratingon your podcast platform. LET'S CONNECT  Subscribe here 👉 https://www.youtube.com/@menopause_doctor Website 👉 https://www.drlouisenewson.co.uk/Instagram 👉   /@drlouisenewsonpodcast  LinkedIn 👉     / https://www.linkedin.com/in/drlouisenewson/ TikTok 👉   / https://www.tiktok.com/@drlouisenewson Spotify 👉 https://open.spotify.com/show/7dCctfyI9bODGDaFnjfKhg  LEARN MORE Download my balance app 👉 https://www.balance-menopause.com/balance-app/Get tickets for my new theatre tour, Breaking the Cycle 👉 https://www.nlp-ltd.com/dr-louise-newson-breaking-the-cycle/ Pre order my new book 👉 https://bio.to/ThePowerofHormones

So Sarah Jane, it's great to have you on my podcast. We're just laughing, actually, because Sarah Jane's just told me that she waffles on a lot. So if there's some interruptions, we'll know why. So it's one of the things that keeps me going, actually. Someone was asking me last night, you know, why do you keep going when you keep being told off or you keep being blocked? And it's because of stories. It's because of women. And my patience, but not just my patience, actually.

increasingly people recognize me, they stop me in the street. And it's not just a thank you for your nice Instagram account. It's actually usually thank you because you've saved my life, because I've got information from your Instagram or your podcast or balance app. And it's made me realize what's going on in my life. And then they could get help. Whether they got help in my clinic or elsewhere is irrelevant, actually. because the first treatment in my mind is just being empowered with knowledge.

And it's very humbling and I don't do any of the work for that. But it makes me realise that it's really important work that I'm doing and I do it with a great team of people. So you reached out to say, thank you. But it's just useful, I think, to hear stories from real people. So if you don't mind just sharing a little bit, that would be great. Okay, hi, Louise. Thank you for inviting me.

So I'll try and be as quick as I can because I go around the houses. So basically I was diagnosed with ADHD last year, last September. Life changing. All my life, I thought I was stupid and lazy. Got this diagnosis. Got the medication. And wow. Absolutely wow.

My life completely changed. But in such a challenging way. So I just try to, it's like starting my whole life after 46 years. but then the perimenopause crept up along and absolutely blew me out of the water to the point where I felt like I was on a roller coaster and not the fun kind. I was, I didn't want to get up in the morning

I have everything in my life and more but I couldn't, I didn't feel like I existed, I felt numb and a desperate basically and suicide was something that has been in my mind because I just couldn't cope anymore. So I had to start pulling my socks up and deciding that no one's going to help me. I need to go and do it for myself. So after listening to podcasts about being diagnosed late with ADHD

and listening to podcasts with you in and another lady as well, a very well-named lady, as I'm walking around taking a dog for a walk because I didn't have any time to do this. And I thought, okay, testosterone keeps coming up. What is this link? So I'd research, like before I couldn't retain information. Now I'm like a sponge. I am 2 o'clock in the morning.

Ting, right, what can I research now, you know? And I came up with the testosterone. So I went to my doctors and I said, look, I'm looking at testosterone. They're saying, no, we don't do that. But we can give you estrogen. And I was like, well, I heard that because with ADHD, hormones, everything gets a lot worse for us and that we need X amount of this, this, this. Oh, well, I don't really know about that. So here's a patch. So they gave me a patch. And within

an hour, I felt sick. And in three hours, I thought I had the flu. So I took it off and thought, right, okay, that's not right. I went privately to a menopause specialist. And I said, do you have any knowledge about ADHD? And she says, no. I said, right, okay, but I really need that support because there's a different link. You know, we are getting treated like other ladies without ADHD, but we are needing more help. She says, well, I can give you some gel. I'll reduce the amount.

Off you go. Put the gel on and, oh my goodness, I was in and out of consciousness. I put it on at night time and I felt like the... So were you still having periods at this time? Yeah, I'm still having periods now. Yeah, you see, just for listeners to know, like if women are still having periods, they're still producing some,

it's impossible to know how much Easterdial and progesterone. So sometimes when we give hormones estrogen and progesterone, when women are still producing it, you can get too much in the body and this is sounding like, obviously I don't know the ins and outs, but sounds like that's, that's, so when

people have low progesterone, low estradiol, then having those hormones obviously can make a lot of difference. But for some women, it can amplify too much and make things worse, which is what it sounds like happened to you. Yeah, and it wasn't just affecting me because like I've masked all my life and then of a sudden I'm having to put

my mask back on just to get through the day you know my family really suffered because my moods were horrendous to the point where I was I was shouting of a husband because he didn't fill the water the water jar up what's it called filter that's the one and you know I'm like he's just empty dishwasher for me and he's just done this for me and he's just done that and I'm going absolutely mad at him so again I thought right okay I need to really look at this so again I went back to your information. I did a bit more research on you. And again, like you said on Thursday about, you know,

you're upsetting a few people because of the ways that you're wanting to help people, which is so brave of you. I think it's amazing because it needs to be done. Women are losing their lives. And so I went to the clinic. I did it all online. I had to pay, which is obviously. when you're in a situation like that, you will pay the money.

But I'm very fortunate to be in a position where I can pay. Whereas there's lots of people which I've been in touch with recently can't afford the payment. So I've said, look, Christmas is coming up. Can you ask people for a bit of money instead of a present? Then you can put this money together because I said, really, you only need like I had two appointments. That's all I had. And I got diagnosed with PMDD, which I didn't even know what that was. But I had my start in my first period at 8.

I had really heavy periods. I had every contraceptive going that hasn't helped. And I had personal depression for two years. So again, I've been let down that side. Yes. So it's like, so when I'm talking to this doctor on your lovely doctors, Dr. Dando, she was really, really nice. And she was a bit, okay, this is, this is going to be a tough one. Let's see how we go with this.

We'll have to do things probably backwards with you. like to say she thought the PMDD which made sense so she says what we're going to start with is testosterone so a small amount every morning every evening and then we're going to introduce the progesterone so I have two weeks on two weeks off and then you see how you get on with that

three months later we'll have a chat again and then we'll look at the Easter gel because clearly I was a bit scared about doing that after my last two experiences So within that, I would say within three weeks, wow, I was, my husband's like, who, it's this. I'm like, I know this is the person I should be, but I can't be because of the hormones. But then I'm just crazy lady, you know, I would have been put away in a psychiatric ward years ago and that's what's happening still. And it's absolutely heartbreaking because I went to your talk, Louise, which was amazing.

And that story you told, I was bawling my eyes out to the point where I actually reached out to someone. afterwards because she had the similar experiences. And I just feel as though, like I say, I was so amazed by the difference. And then after three months I went, come on, let's do it, let's try it. And within three days, that was it. That was the final piece of the jigsaw to the point where, sorry, that's why I've got me jump from. I cried because I was just, I've never ever felt so good in my life.

I'm 47 now. and I've never felt so alive, I think the word is, because I always felt so numb because I've had lots of things thrown at me but then I realise I have to be a warrior and that's what I'm doing. I'm a warrior. I'm on an ADHD UK app on Facebook

and as soon as I see a post going, I've had enough, I can't do this anymore. I'm like straight in there with, Have you checked this? Have you checked that? And people have private messaged me. I think I've helped about 20 people so far. And they're going, oh, this is what I needed to hear because I'm not getting any answers. But a lot of it is to do with the cost.

People can't afford that. No, absolutely. And people shouldn't have to pay. You know, I've learned a lot as a doctor over the last 30 years. And, you know, when I qualified, I knew vanishingly little about hormones, especially the role in their brain. But also as women, it's often normalized. a lot. You know, the hormonal changes we get throughout our cycle is just something we have to

put up with almost. And, you know, I don't know why we have to put up with something, because, you know, if people have pain because they've hurt their finger or they have headaches or they have arthritis, they don't have to put up with it. It's fine to medicalise various symptoms. But the problem is for women, it's almost like, well, that's just their emotions. And people do know it's due to hormones, but they're too almost scared or they don't have the right understanding because then they think, well, let's just give contraception because that's labelled as hormones, but it's not hormones. And so increasingly we see and speak to a lot more younger women who are like you were 20 years

ago, they're experiencing symptoms. And it's really sad because a lot of people don't know what it's like to feel well because they just had to carry on like that. And many of us, you know, myself included, which we'd started hormones many years before. And we try really hard. You know, I think that many years ago, you know, I was trying really hard with, you know, exercise and nutrition

and everything else. Some people just said, well, you've got three children, you'd be a bit tired. But they never said that to my husband, not once. And, you know, often women know something isn't right. And if you're not getting help for my healthcare professional, we ask other people.

And there's a lot of criticism about social media, but actually it allows people to have conversations with people they've not had before. And not all the information is correct. Of course it isn't. But a lot of it is. And I think that's what's happening in these conversations.

And I'm sure it's the same for the forums that you're joining as well, is that women are joining the dots quicker than healthcare professionals often. Yeah, definitely. And it's like that's aware. Now where, you know, I get, people say to me, oh, you're jumping on that bandwagon, are you? You got ADHD, have you?

And I say, oh, what a strange thing to say. I didn't know you was with me all my life. And then I don't justify it anymore. If you're my friend, you're no longer my friend. I have lost friends. I am not bothered because they're not my people. People who get me or have stuck around. People who question me or not interested, then I'm too busy.

now too busy to get that on with everything else. I want to make a difference and I don't need that. But going back to the hormone, like I said, I'm on three lots of HRT and I said to Dr. Dando, is this something I can get on NHS? It's like, well, yes, but you've gone privately now to the aren't great with doing that. So I was like, right, okay, I will try that then. So the next day, I actually emailed the doctor saying, look, I asked for your help. You couldn't help me.

I'm on my knees, my family are on the knees. I've just had this, you know, thrown at me. Now I've had this thrown at me. And I just want to live. I just want to feel good. So please help me because everything I've been prescribed I can have on the NHS. So why should I have to pay when everybody else doesn't? What have I done wrong to deserve that treatment?

And I said, you know, I'd need to have a blood test after three months. Again, that I have to charge me. why, why, please help me. And the next day, yes, we can. Raising. They can. And it's like, because I would have really, if they didn't, I would make a way. People can't say no to me now because I'll find a way around it.

It's like I am on a mission. It's very important because you absolutely right to ask for hormones. And it's really interesting because in the clinic, obviously the clinic that I work in is a private clinic, but a lot of people actually are able to come once or twice. They go on the right hormones for them and then their NHSGPs take over, they're prescribing. But there are still a lot of GPs that say, no, you can't, we won't. And I can sort of understand if they're not getting the right training or education or if it was a really, really unusual condition. So say, for example, I was running a rheumatology clinic and someone had an autoimmune condition that needed quite high doses

of a biologic agent which has lots can have lots of potential risks and side effects and maybe needs monitoring if I wasn't confident as a GP you know I wouldn't want to prescribe something I wasn't confident in but what surprises me is that GPs seem quite happy to say oh I'm not trained in menopause yet hormones yet half of their population will have hormonal changes. Yeah. So it feels like almost embarrassing that they're just got this willful blindness,

whereas if I was a psychiatrist and I'd prescribed you some antidepressants and said, could you continue these for Sarah Jane and the NHS, the chances are they probably would. Whereas there are more risks with antidepressants than there are with hormones. And you've been very clear. Thank you for that.

Talking about how the hormones have probably saved your life as well and improved your mental health and your family life and everything else too. So you're not on methadone, you're not on some awful drug that has got risks, and then the natural body identical hormones, so they don't have the risk of breast cancer or stroke or cloth or whatever that older synthetic hormones do. So it just feels this real, like sometimes I think I live in a parallel world, really, and it must be like that for patients because, you know,

why do you have to ask so, you know, be so sort of worried about asking for something that it's just replacing your natural hormones? That's it. And it's like the synthetic hormones for ADHD people, that is the worst thing you can do. I had a marina coil fitted and within, so three or four weeks, I had it taken out. And they were like, oh no, you need to keep it in for longer. I was like, listen, I need this out. And I've done more research.

This is the worst thing I could have had. and if you don't take it out, I'm going to take it out myself. Because I can't, it was even worse. My moods were bad anyway. This was even worse. And, you know, and it's like, we're in the 21st century. We can talk to people from all over the world and be in front of them. Yeah.

But we can't look at this. So it's been out forever and ever. We've always had the menopause. We've always had periods. So why, why are we not being? looked at. You know, it's like I've been let down with, I wasn't looked at as ADHD, because it was the naughty boys that got all the attention and the support, obviously, or not support. We didn't. So, okay, right, okay, I've agreed for that. Let's move on. And then it's

like, well, hold on a minute. Now I'm going again, am I? I'm having to get up and stand up and and just wobble some heads because nobody's doing it for me. So I'm having to do that. And I am put on this planet to help people that's why I'm here and I have got so many different things going on with different things and I just want to make a difference and if I can save just one person

which I have done then I'll keep on doing and listening to you and and the amazing work that you're doing you know like yes a few people have like been a bit upset about things but actually if you look at the bigger picture how many people have actually saved don't look at that

you know of course not no one wants to think about good things. But you see, it's happened for many years, actually. I'm very interested in the history of medicine. And there's lots of female doctors that have been taken down by the establishment over the years, but also women have not been believed and listened to. And, you know, you only need to take a peek into the asylums in the Victorian times. They were full of hormonal women. But they were a nuisance, so it's easier just to lock them away. If you go into psychiatric hospital now, there'll be lots of women who have been sectioned. And some of those women, they'll have hormonal changes. If you go into prison service, which I have done last year,

most of the women in prisons have hormonal changes. But people are only worried about them getting pregnant, so we'll give them synthetic hormones. And so the synthetic hormones, like you say, block the natural hormones working in the brain, and often mental health can worsen. But people don't join the dots in medicine, so the psychiatrists don't think about hormones, and the people who are prescribing contraception don't think about mental health. So the people that are suffering, with these conversations are women. And the people that are suffering the most are the women from lower socioeconomic classes. Yes, I was bad to say.

Women from different ethnicities, often because of different cultures, but also English isn't their first language. And women that just don't have a voice because they're just pummel to the ground. So it's not always people from low socioeconomic classes. You know, there's a lot of people I see who are actually very wealthy, but they are having such an awful life and they have no one to ask. advocate for themselves as well. Because if you're in a relationship, it might not be a good relationship so you can't share that.

And I think a lot of times when people are feeling very vulnerable and low, they need somebody else to help them get the treatment that they want and understand about the value of hormones. And that's where, you know, working with other people, you know, I couldn't have done this work 40 years ago without the internet, without social media. We couldn't have done this podcast, you know. Yes. Things have really moved on and I think a lot of medical people don't like this empowerment that's happening outside the consultating rooms. But I think it's really, really powerful actually because a lot of things are about choice.

You know, we can choose about all sorts of things that affect our health, either positively or negatively. So I can choose whether I'm going to have avocado for lunch or whether I'm going to have fish and chips or burgers for lunch. And no doctor is telling me off for having an unhealthy diet choice. I could smoke 20 cigarettes a day and no one would come knocking at my door. Whereas if I ask for some natural hormones to help my mental health and physical health, it suddenly come to this awfulness. And it does seem a bit almost laughable. If people weren't suffering, it would be laughable.

But the suffering is palpable. Absolutely. That's why I want to make a difference because not everybody's got what I've got. and I that's why yes on a mission because yes which is great because there's lots we need to do and we need to work together and women work better when they lift each other up not push people down and you know this is a global revolution that we're starting or we've started or we're continuing I don't know who started it but it's been going for a long time that women deserve a voice and we can amplify our voices in a lot quicker ways so I'm it's great

for you to be so open to talk about what you're doing because we all can help each other and we learn from our own experiences so much, definitely. But just three things, Sarah Jane, that you think are going to make the biggest difference over the next 10 years because we can't be in this mess in another 5, 10 years' time. It's not fair on women who are suffering. No, not at all. So the only thing is it's just getting it out there. And also, like, doctors, why can't they have one nurse who does a course on menopause?

Menopause in ladies with ADHD, menopause without ADHD. And have a nurse at that practice. Yeah. That's so important. That's sensible. It's simple, isn't it? Yeah. It's not rocket science.

But I think things are changing and we need to just keep changing quicker and faster to help and reach more women. But that's for people like yourself. you know, you are, you know, you didn't, you didn't come into menopause support. You, you had a different life before this, but you've made such a difference to so many people's lives. And, and you're just such an inspiration. And, yes, you just, you need to be cloned. So I want to be one. No one really wants my life, I tell you.

Well, thank you so much for coming today. It's been really great. Thank you. I really appreciate the support. Thank you.