The Dumb Zone FREE - DZ 10-21-24: The Cowboys couldn't hurt us this weekend

Episode Date: October 22, 2024

Hear every episode of The Dumb Zone by subscribing at DumbZone.com or Patreon.com/TheDumbZoneThe Cowboys couldn't disappoint us this weekend so pretty nice little two day stretch for us. We go around the NFL for Week 7, Dan reports live from the scene of Deshaun's last NFL snap, and Jake asks us to google Judge Judy's ass (00:00) - Open: Weekend check (33:07) - Sports: Around the NFL Week 7 (01:00:49) - Viewer Mail: Columbine or 9/11? (01:14:31) - Dan live from Cleveland (02:04:04) - News: Goodbye State Fair (02:35:24) - Today in History: Judge Judy ass iimage search ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Hello, I'm DFW's own Danny Bayless letting you know that you are about to hear a free podcast of the dumb zone But if you'd like to subscribe at dumbzone.com You will get four shows per week plus the weekend wrap-up and any bonus epis like our business Wednesday interviews Oh, you'll also get our DZ TV archives again. That's.com to subscribe. Now, on to today's program. You went into the medical tent at one point, came back out 200 yards, two touchdowns. What was the difference for you guys? I just started praying. I was in pain, but I trust my teammates. We kept fighting and we never gave up, so all the glory belongs to God. He's the one that brought me through. Where was the pain, Jameis?

Yeah, just pain, there was pain everywhere Alright, alright, alright, alright, alright Alright, alright, alright, alright, alright I never listen, I'm gonna listen I wanna listen to the dumb zone Well, hello there It's the dumb zone. Well, hello there. It's the dumb zone on a Monday. It's show 253.

Can you guys see your monitors? No. Okay. Just making sure it wasn't just me. Rob, into action. Dan's still out. He will join us for the back half of the show today. He is in Cleveland.

He was there yesterday for a big day in Cleveland Browns history. Deshaun was booed coming out of the tunnel. Contrast that with the return of Nick Boner-Chubb. And then Happy Baby tore his Achilles. Dan was there for all it's funny that dan seems to be more fascinated over football with a particular chain restaurant yeah that's garnering most of his attention. Yeah. Who is this? Dan. No, who is this talking right now? Everybody give a warm welcome to today's special guest host, Danny Heavy Metal Bass.

Heavy Metal Vegas Rob with the classic rock video edits get to zoom in and out real quick I think I went surfs up instead of heavy metal I've been out of the game

too long Danny's here in for Dan he'll be here tomorrow as well Dan will join us for the back half of the show today to give us our Browns report

what are you doing transition yeah it is funny Dan, who'll be here tomorrow as well. Dan will join us for the back half of the show today to give us our Browns report. What are you doing? Transition. Yeah, it is funny. We talked about it the other day. We talked about it the other day that when he goes to Browns games, things happen. Yeah. The last one was the Mason Rudolph game. Yeah.

Big things. And the last game he was at, it was the only time the Cowboys were good this year. That's also true. Now, he didn't step foot into the stadium, but boy, I was feeling. He's in the right. Oh, that's right. He didn't sit with the common folk. He never does.

That's right. I was feeling good that day, Blake. And it wasn't just because I was there with heart attack, man. But you need to feel good. Yeah. It was, we were flying high. No surprise. But you need to feel good. Yeah. It was, we were flying high. Aubrey's kicking from 70. It's good times.

And it's been pretty much downhill from there. But I will say yesterday was awesome. It's the best weekend of the season for me. Cowboys bye? Mm-hmm. It's pressure free. Or a Monday or Thursday works too. It's pressurehmm. It's pressure-free. Or a Monday or Thursday works, too. It's pressure-free.

It's stress-free. And normally what TV networks do is they put games with good teams on television for the country to see, and the Cowboys is the other one. Mm-hmm. So anytime I'm at home, I don't do Sunday Ticket. So anytime I'm at home, I don't do Sunday Ticket. I have Red Zone, but I usually don't even fool with it too much because I'll go with God in the games that the suits selected for me. That's what I did yesterday. Yeah, Lions-Vikings was cool.

It was awesome. So was the afternoon game. It was nice. I've been calling that real football. Yeah, it is real football. There's Cowboys football, and then calling that real football. Yeah, it is real football. There's Cowboys football, and then there's real football. Yeah, I would agree with that. So, yeah, that's what we have in the back half today.

Dan will join us. We'll talk some Browns. We'll do some news. But before then, we're going to do some football. And before then, we're going to do a weekend check, which is brought to you by the fine folks at Frankel and Frankel. They are personal injury lawyers.

Danny, who were they chosen by? The people. Who were they feared by? The insurance companies. I knew he knew it. He's not even reading the copy. He's not even prepping. I can't find it. Now, are they based in Sao Paulo or Hong Kong?

Right here in the Metroplex, Jake. Should I call them two, maybe three days after I get in a wreck? No, unless you're like really hurt and you need to call an AMBO, an AMBOLAM. Now, all you got to do is pick up your phone and you remember. Hold on. Whoa, whoa. No, you call them first. That's the thing.

Because the case starts immediately. But I bet if I wanted to do that, do I have to dial like a plus one? Like I'm a country code of some sort? You don't need a country code. They're good from either major Metroplex area code. 214 over here on the east side or for you west coasters 817 and then all you have to remember is the number three that's right just think Babe Ruth they're like the Babe Ruth of lawyers yeah what's up that's exactly what they say when I call will I talk to

a janitor or some sort of uh low low on the totem pole type? No joke. Cold called the Frankles one time on the air to get some legal advice on something we were discussing. Yeah. Expecting fully to get a receptionist to answer, patch us through, called 214-333-3333. And Gene Burkett picked up the phone. Yeah. He's a good man, that Gene Burkett. They'll take care of you.

They know what the insurance company is trying to pull on you. You know what? I saw a video this weekend going around of like, not fake, but hitting runs where people are trying to pull scams. Yeah. Let me tell you something. Somebody does that to you, you call the Frankel, scam is over. Yeah. That's the end of the scam.

That's how they do it at the Frankels. Thank you call the Frankels, scam is over. Yeah. That's the end of the scam. That's how they do it at the Frankels. Thank you to the Frankels. 214-817- 333- 3333. So for weekend check, anybody want to grab the ball? Blake? Danny? Yeah, I'll go because I don't have much. I think you guys kind of spent a portion of your

weekend together. We did. As usual. You can share stories. I was going to begin with the Eagles. What happened? Remaining undefeated in district play. Awesome. Well, not overall, but yeah, district play. So that was my Friday night in Mansfield.

Did a little weekend wrap up Saturday morning and then yeah, headed out to Arlington and I think I told you this. When I heard what the party was and where the GPS was taking me, I couldn't quite compute it. Yeah. Because this is pasture with horses and all get up in Arlington,

right off Randall Mill. So it was kind of strange to turn off 30 and, I don't know, go a mile north or so and then turn off into the country almost. Yeah. I mean, you know what they say about uh arlington uh on all their brochures and stuff it just says discover arlington you know because there's so much there that you might not know about might be something to it yeah um but yeah i appreciated the party that uh anything to get them away from a screen

is cool and i don't know it just kind is cool. And I don't know. It just kind of feels good to, I don't know, go back to nature, I guess. Go back to the outside. Yeah. Perfect day. SG way of saying that. You discovered Arlington. Kind of.

Yeah. That's right. The slogan worked. That's right. And below it says more than the Judge Roy screen. Yes. There's some nature out there. More than the Texas Giant.

Yeah. I appreciated the start time of the party. I feel like you guys know to, it's got to be at least 2 o'clock or after for afternoon nap. This is a controversial topic. So I'm with you. I think that 3 o'clock is the second best start time. I think the best start time is like 9 or 10. 100%. 10 a.m.?

Yeah. TC's daughter's birthday last year, it was either 9 or 9.30 or 10. And you're done by noon, so you can still probably hit the nap, roughly on time, and you're done. You're done for the

day. That's my favorite, but that wasn't really going to work because this place sounds super super uh white but i think they do like horse they do horse riding lessons in the morning and then after that they can you can just go there and the kids can do like a small trot with the pony you You can paint a horse, which seems really beaten. Paint a pony. Alliteration. Like a white pony that's just chill and kids paint the pony.

Really? Yeah, they stick their hand in a mound of paint and they can go and draw or whatever. And the horse is just cool with it? Yeah, it just chills. And then we saw the horse like 20 minutes later and we're like, is that the same one? Like they just pose it and it's done. But the girls loved it. The cool with it. Yeah, it just chills. And then we saw the horse like 20 minutes later, and we're like, is that the same one? Like, they just pose it, and it's done.

But the girls loved it. The kids loved it. Yeah. They gave it a bunch of hay, and it was cool. Yeah. Just sat there. Yeah. Yeah, that was cool.

And then played a little poker Saturday night. Oh, wife gone? She always works weekends, right? Yeah. Yeah, she's gone. Got some babysitting after the party. Nice. And then, yeah, just really sucked it up at softball Sunday morning, and then here we are.

Hangover? No. Slight? Okay. No. I'm just old. You're old. What did you mash better at, softball or poker?

I'm not a poker player. I don't have the patience for it. Like, if fifth or sixth hand in, if you want to go all in, let's go all in. That's something I'd like to be good at. Poker? Yeah. I know it takes time, though. Yeah.

Time. Yeah. It's hard. Have you played much? A little, but not enough to know really what to do. 20 years ago, I guess, when it was. That was the heyday. Oh, my God.

I never got into it like I wanted to just because I didn't have a bankroll. Yeah. But playing with guys that really knew what they were doing, it was always funny to see their reaction when they played with somebody that wasn't familiar with the game or maybe plays the way Blake does impatiently and will just go all in with nothing because he wants the game to move along, to watch them get so frustrated and yell at the people, you're not playing right.

And it's some girl that just never has really played before and wants to get in on a game and puts her money up. And she looks at her 7-2 offsuit and says, yeah, I think I'm going to go all in. And she'll at her 7-2 offsuit and says, yeah, I think I'm going to go all in. And she'll end up winning. Or river riders, people that will just keep betting, keep betting, just waiting on that final card. And the problem is, is in time, if you play that way enough, obviously the odds are against you.

But it can benefit you if you're playing for like 30 minutes or an hour. And you can kind of wipe people out just out of sheer luck but it's really frustrating to play uh what i didn't really care that much because it was never like a massive amount of money that i was risking but playing with guys that really know what they're doing it's fascinating and i learned a lot about it but i just know myself and gambling is not a road that i need to go down no i i loved playing like i like playing cards. Yeah. I kind of hate that that's gone away.

People don't sit around and just play cards anymore. And so I enjoyed that aspect of it. Who put this together, this poker game? Monty. Oh. Did you do it out somewhere? No, at his house. Okay.

Watched some Texas Georgia. That sounds fun. Yeah, yeah i mean it's crazy i i would have thought it could be a part of it hypothetically it sounds like all like people that i'm friends with right would you have attended if you were invited of course not no so that's not that you don't know that i'm not dan yeah but you're jake who has a million things to do. You want to play poker. That's probably not a good environment for you to be in.

One-legged friend is probably not high atop your list. After your previous month being in a poker game with Monty. You've got to get through it somehow or at some point. I mean, his kitchen table probably looks like it was on Frank Sinatra's Rider. Yeah, I mean, he does live in a pool hall. True. It's probably not a whole lot of silver folk in there. I hate that I missed the party.

As I texted you Saturday morning, my son, who was with me on Friday night, he decided to wake up at 4 a.m actually no he was with his mom friday night but she told me he woke up at 4 a.m and he's been up since it's always a fun and he won't nap he's done and that's that's out of the equation naps are over so it's basically a wild ride of a bipolar baby where the highs are really euphoric and the lows are extremely low. And not only did I not want that for myself or for him, I definitely didn't want to project all that onto a birthday party that wasn't his. But I agree with you on the start times. Nine o'clock is perfect.

It's absolutely perfect. And if you can do it on a Sunday. Ooh, you're going to get cheaper rate too. It's cheaper rate. It's absolutely perfect and if you can do it on a Sunday You're going to get a cheaper rate too. It's a cheaper rate. It doesn't screw up all of your friends Saturday that they've been waiting all week for. You do it at 9 in the morning on a Sunday.

You just do donuts and coffee. The kids love donuts. The parents love coffee and donuts. You're out of there by 11 o'clock so dads can get home and watch football and it's an excuse to skip church if you're still into that fallacy yeah no that's that's a solid play that's a solid play three three wasn't horrible and it also helped that it was a really awesome day like we got very very lucky yeah you did the weather yeah so we did that that did that. The other thing was

they put all the kids on a... All of us on a flatbed trailer and just pulled it around the property, which included stopping at the stables and feeding horses apples and carrots. Kids love that shit. That's so cool. I like it too. I felt like

I bonded with one of them. I'm creeped out by horse people but i get it i do like gorgeous uh uh majestic animals yes right yeah but people who hold them in person is something it's something to experience if you've never really done it before people who get really into horses though there's something suspect there i don't like it's just dude it's no different than people that that love their dogs on a level beyond what i think any of us i'll just say it it feels like some people are attracted to horses okay that's that's kind of what i'm saying you know they're hung i guess it was funny whenever they were getting ready to put uh there were four of them in like this main writing area and the,

the kids could go out and they had a helper put them on Brooks did it. Right. Yeah. And they kind of trot around and right when we walked up, I can't remember which one of our friends it was, but somebody was like, that horse is excited. Just a massive throbbing horse boner.

Oh no. Massive. Yeah. Were the kids affected by this as far as what's that? I don't think anyone noticed. But he was rocked up for the birthday party. It's so smart for kids' birthday party. We all three have boys that are within about a year of one another or so

toddler age boys and there's doing the party at home which we did for his first never again yeah it's tough never again i'm glad to pay the whatever 150 dollars to rent out uh play street museum for 90 minutes because basically here's 150 you clean this shit up we're leaving yeah rather than having people in your house using your toilet you got to deflate the bounce house and wait on that that ex carney to come pick that up and load it onto his flat butt bed never at the right time that he says he's going to be there can i just leave it there overnight i'll get it i'll send otis to go get it in the morning yeah fine dude otis ain't waking up now otis ain't getting up especially on a sunday morning but yeah doing the party at home it's it's off the list super stress not an option anymore we

did the party at the house last weekend yeah and it's not that the party sucks or cleanup is that bad. It's just the stress of the week of getting everything clean, getting everything tidy. There's that. People are going to stay the night and all this kind of stuff. Yeah. And it's not worth it. All we had to do was get the pies, the pizza pies delivered.

Shout out to Mama's. Oh, my gosh. It's been a minute since I've eaten at Mama's. That was a staple of my youth. Oh, Mama's? Yeah. It's really good. Yeah.

Yeah. That was a big hit. Yeah. the last two malcolm parties well until we until his third which we decided to do at a remote location the first two were at the house why did you just make it sound like the party was at area 51 we're at a remote undisclosed location yeah yeah but um but the ones we did at the house, for first and second birthday parties, it was Pizza Inn. Oh.

So I went back to my old roots. There you go. And the one on Live Oak, dude, it holds up. Yeah, I know. It's exactly the same as it was in the 80s. Hey, the one over in North Richland Hills, it's probably technically Richland Hills, is kicking hard. Managed by our good friend. Your buddy, right?

Our good friend, DB, Danny Brinion. Have you ever done the pizza order for a party and you really overshot your estimate? Yeah. And you end up giving like a full extra large to everybody that attended to take home with them because you just ordered too damn much? It's just tough, especially with kids. So I did the math, and what I ended up with was I gave Blake about half a pizza, and then there was about another half to three-quarters left. And another family member with kids took part of that.

We left with like four slices of cheese. So not too bad. That's not bad. Not too bad at all. I know my pizza math. I'm really good at it. It's a skill of mine. He understands radius and circumference.

That's right. Area. Right. Yeah. I mean, I've told these guys this before, but I was the pizza orderer for my family from a very early age. And I learned all the tricks, folks. Because I would call, and my mom would give me the order,

and I would tell my mom the total. And she's like, no, no, no, no. And she would call back, and I watched how she worked and she would always get it $6 or $7 cheaper. The first thing you ask is, do you have any specials? And if you know roughly how many pizzas you want, let's say two, get specific. What are your two pizza specials right now? Not do you have any two pizza specials.

You go in with an intent and if they don't have something they'll come up with something yeah it's all let me see here it's a matter of it all depends on how you phrase the question it's not do you right because the answer can simply be oh not at this time you assume that they do and then you ask them what they are. Exactly. Just play them up. Play them up. You might get something free, something cool you didn't even know about.

What else did we have going on? Father-in-law was in town, Louisiana father-in-law. Dude, he brought me some boudin with shrimp in it. Shrimp boudin. It was already cooked. All we had to do was throw a few links in the oven, and I'm like, this is God made this. I love boudin, but it was real shrimp chunks in the boudin.

You leave it to the Louisianans to come up with the wild-ass idea to put rice in sausage, and I'll be damned, it's not one of the best things you can ever eat. It was so good. So he was there. Sister-in-law, I guess, is what she is technically, was there. Kristen's half-sister. And that was cool because the boy is big enough now to where, you know,

he goes crazy on a bike and a scooter and all that stuff. Father-in-law is like, all right, now I got the one I wanted, the boy. Finally. Yeah. Yeah, so he's really into it. What else did we have? have oh a lot of football obviously i feel like there was something else i wanted to tell you guys but now i don't recall it watched a lot of sports hell of a lot of sports college football saturday yeah that was nice

how bad were you at softball that's kind of been bugging me since you said it. I just hit singles. Couldn't elevate, which means I couldn't celebrate. So launch angle was just garbage. Just absolutely atrocious. Too tired? Just mentally lack mental focus? Just didn't have it today, Danny.

You know, consistency is what separates the professionals from the weekend warriors. You got to be able to go out there every time and deliver, and you didn't. I know. I used to be able to. Not anymore. I might hang it up. That's sad. One other thing I did do this weekend in my quest for full transparency.

So on Friday when we got done with work, it was the first time I was ever like, damn, I want a beer. Oh really? First time since I left. And it was like Friday afternoon, the weather was perfect. I'd had a hellacious work week getting, trying to get a bunch of stuff done. And I was like, damn, like, I don't want to get drunk. I want a beer right now. And I called my wife and I was like, yo, Hey, I told you, I'd tell you when this happened. Like I want a beer right now and i called my wife and i was like yo hey i told you i'd tell you when this happened like i want a beer right now and i'm what i'm gonna do is i went to tom thumb and i bought my first six pack of non-alcoholic beer no one blue moon did the trick yeah one fake blue moon yeah they have like a million of them now yeah like when Like when I was a kid, it was just O'Doul's. Or Coors Cutter.

I didn't even know that exists. I've never heard of that before. And it just seemed like, ah, that's just, it probably tastes like piss. Man, they've made. But they have like. The European game. Yeah. It's strong.

Tom Holland. Spider-Man just came out with one. Dax Shepard has one. Yep. They're real skunky. They make IP just came out with one. Dax Shepard has one. Yep. They're real skunky and real fresh. They make IPAs and stuff like that. Honestly, I had one of those on Friday afternoon sitting out front with the kids

on their scooters and bikes. I was like, that's exactly what I was looking for. A fruity, crisp, refreshing drink. Yep. So I don't know. Did you miss the... No. Was there any kind of placebo effect like when you drank it? Kind of. And it felt like maybe I'm a little buzzy.

I felt relaxed. Okay. There's a half percent alcohol in each one. So basically you'd probably need about nine or ten in 30 minutes to feel like you drank one beer. Right. So it's not – there's no effect to to it but you do feel just like i felt relaxed like all right cool we're doing it and again like aa is super against this idea some people will tell you i was one that's a horrible horrible idea um but i don't know it's case by

case whatever works for you each person but you know i went i went to the store and looked at it and they had probably 10 different kinds, and you could order online. It sounds like you wanted the flavor and the taste of the beer, not the experience of what it does to you. Yeah, I was not thinking about that at all. What I was thinking was, I don't want another LaCroix. Fine product. You've been hammering those? Well, yeah.

I was already on that, but we'd mix it up with all the various versions. Obviously, Topo's the king. Topo's the king. Glass bottle only. Of course. Yeah. Of course. But at some point, you're like, all right, I've had enough lime and grapefruit water.

Right. Because I don't drink soda at all. Same. I haven't had a Coke in probably a decade. Yeah. Because I thought when I went to treatment, that is a big thing. Because first of all, if you've been drinking a lot, your body is going to crave sugar. Because that's why people were so pissed that there was no candy there.

Wow. Because they were like, I have to have more sugar in my body right now. And so anybody that I know that's been to treatment, they got really into soda. And there was one dude there. It was probably 45, 46. Actually, this is the dude that cut my hair for four packs of wintergreen. Long cut. I never saw the dude without two Pepsis in his hand because they had a fountain

and you could just go fill it up as much as you wanted really yeah you like that it's a dream no coke or dr pepper i'm a huge soda guy do you want to have unlimited pepsis in your house oh yeah unlimited pepsis is like seven or eight other they also have the taco bell they also had gatorade fountain orange fountain gatorade which I'm a big fan of. Throw that in like half water. But yeah, he was just like, I would literally never not have a beer in my hand. He worked on a painting crew. And he was like, we just drank all the time.

Dude, it's that old school way of doing it. Yeah. I don't think I've ever told you i was probably in college and had come back home to visit and you know what happens in college you kind of discover weed and drinking and and drinking more than just uh finding a way to acquire the beverage and then sneaking away and maybe having a couple or three or or whatever but when you're in college you're on your own kind of do whatever you want so you you kind of experience, you kind of understand what your limitations are, how much it takes to get to feel like the way you want to feel, you know what it takes to get you to be sick. And

you kind of gauge your, you know, what, what I never thought about that, but yes, that is kind of when you discover that because you don't have any real accountability or have to sneak in late at night and pretend you're not drunk because your mom's going to see you. And I remember coming home from school and my uncle, my mom's brother lived on the same block as us. He owned an auto parts store on the same block and his wife ran the city cleaners, which was on the same block. And my uncle is like this old school, skinny, tan dude tan dude sinewy not an ounce of body fat on him

chain smoked winston cigarettes owned an auto parts store and that was the place for like old crusty dudes to hang out like you'd walk in there and there would just be guys just sitting around just chewing the fat just chopping it up with my uncle and he invited me when i came home you want to go fishing with me and your cousin in the morning i was like yeah that sounds great all right meet us over here at uh i will probably get started around 5 30 because you got to get out there early when they're biting right so i got there i think i walked over across the alley got there at six o'clock and i walk in and it's him and his son my cousin he's older than me quite a bit he goes you want a beer i'm like not really but when in rome so he goes yeah there's a

go back to the fridge let me guess go ahead yellow belly schlitz okay there was schlitz in old milwaukee if you give me two more guesses i probably would have gotten there yeah it's a very very short path. And he goes, we got a case of beer this morning. And I went back there to get a beer. Mind you, it is six in the effing morning. And that case of beer is now a 12-pack. Those sumbitches had already run through a six-pack each by the time I got there. I bet they cleaned up out of the water that day too.

It was amazing. They took that 12-pack, and I think they had more. We went fishing at this tank. I'll try to make this brief. My uncle's idea of fishing is to get three rod and reels, cast them all out on the tank. Of course. Leave them on the bed, get back in his big-ass F-150,

start it up, and chain smoke and drink while he's watching the bobbers and if one moves head on down yeah that son of a bitch caught probably 15 fish and i had like one and they drank beer all day until about noon we go home they eat lunch and then they open the brown drink yeah of course and that goes on until they pass out at 8 30 at night that sounds like a hell of a day to me so yeah when you talk about rehab yeah those guys yeah that yeah there's people but again like you know this guy worked on a painting crew but he made good money and he cut hair on the weekends at like a not he's not at

like you know genero cuts it's amazing he gave me the best haircut i've ever had it looked great when you got it yeah and he's like yeah i just had a beer in my hand or two from the time i woke up until the time i went to sleep that so he always had two plastic cups of pepsi at all times and he was fit yep he worked in manual labor so crazy just the yeah understanding your tolerance and and realizing that that is a real thing i mean those guys drank a case of beer each and then hit brown drink in the evening and uh you know me now i think the last drink i had was probably a month ago maybe five weeks ago and, and it was one or two, and I felt I'm done.

I don't need to feel any more drunk than I already did after two drinks. But then there's times where I could drink like nine or ten drinks in a five-hour period and feel about the same. So shout out to the non-alcoholic beer, if that's what you're into. And the functioning alcoholic, the highly functioning alcoholic. That's very, very true. All right, Blake, let's get into some sports. From the wonderful world of sports, Radio Sports, scoreboard.

I feel like Blake played that sounder for a second. Kind of rushed me along. Kind of like the Oscars when your speech goes too long. Sorry. Come on. Geez. This Sports for the Day is brought to you by Early Bird CBD and their gummies. Speaking of enjoying yourself and not feeling like garbage in the morning,

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I might go see Mark Rubbier this weekend. Oh, yeah. The Loop Daddy. I will be enjoying my early bird CBD. That's a good idea. Before checking that out. I need to get a hold of these. I have not tried them yet, and I keep waiting for one of you guys to open up your backpack and hand me a couple.

Oh. I think that would be awesome. your backpack and hand me a couple because i think that would be awesome because i'd like i just said if you're not drinking really or at all in your case and you still want to kind of chill out at night and maybe kind of feel something that's different than than your day and i've tried cbd and i've never had really good luck with it but this sounds right up my alley yeah kid put down gets a lot easier yeah i think he's talking about him, by the way, Blake putting his child down by him, Blake taking the CBD gummy. I want

to be very, very clear about their vitamins, son. When he's going nuts, I'm a little less... It's great. I think we cleaned that up properly.

It takes the edge off of you. My child, THC. Right. Yep. I think we cleaned that up properly. So yeah, I could give you some, Danny. Please. And I will.

But also, other option, earlybirdcbd.com, where you can use promo code dumbzone. That's good for 20% off as long as they're a client. code dumb zone that's good for 20 off as long as they're a client so so go to early bird cbd.com and her promo code dumb zone 20 off get you some early bird it's nice uh nice little evening take the edge off hey take some and go for a walk on a saturday i'm all about it highly recommend i'm going to use this coupon code and get 20 off at their website rather than relying on you boneheads to share your stash with me. Hey. I'm not sharing.

Respect. All right. Thank you to Early Bird CBD. So sports today, we did have – I guess we'll talk a little Texas and college football tomorrow, but it was just a great weekend of watching ball. Just a great weekend of watching ball. NFL yesterday, we had a couple of big-time matchups.

Didn't see this coming, but right now, pending the Vikings quarterback situation going forward, but it feels like Vikings-Lions is going to be a four- or five-year rivalry that we get to watch twice a year. It's very exciting. I like both their coaches. I like Jared Goff. I tolerate Sam Darnold. Both of them have a bunch of super fun players on both sides of the ball. Sucks Hutch is out, but didn't seem to be a problem for him on Sunday. They were still all over Darnold. That was a fun, fun game. Back and

forth and back and forth. And of course, the Lions come out on top. Dan Campbell. And they just have so many guys I love. We talked about this last week, but Jameer Gibbs with a nice 45-yarder. I love watching most teams second and sometimes even third backs and being like, that would be the best running back Dallas has. Well, yeah, he's a first-round pick.

Sure, but even Aaron Jones is old. And they were able to pick him up. I don't know what his deal is. It's probably not more than a couple years. He's 29 and he's still giving them plenty. My main takeaway from that game was look how fun these teams are.

It's doing crazy stuff. Not off the wall. Different formations, motion, just unpredictable on offense. I left that game thinking, Cowboys are not in these guys' league at all. No.

Amon Raw is such a beast. Right now it feels as if he's edged in front of CD. Really? Right now. Better scheme, better quarterback, better offensive line. Not better quarterback necessarily, but playing better right now. But better offensive line, better scheme. He doesn't have to do it all himself.

I mean. Does he have anybody else in his core that garners attention? Yeah. Unlike CD? Yeah. Yeah. Both running backs can catch. Sam Laporte will pop up every now and then.

Laporte is a two. Jameson Williams is a two, I think. Yeah. No, they definitely stacked up picks. But then, yeah, on the other side, the fact that Jordan Addison could be considered a third wide receiver. I know his numbers haven't been great, but he had a 51-yarder in this game. It was a fun game.

NFC North. Dude. Might not be that bad. Played a fun brand of footballC North. Might not be that bad. Fun brand of football. Just a historically garbage division too. I mean, from top to bottom out of those four teams what was this? Week 7?

Yeah, Week 7. They have six losses between the four teams. Two 5-1s and two well, no, yeah, 5-2. Yeah, the Bears were on the bye, but yeah, even the Packers yesterday, the Texans didn't play great, but the Packers

they eked out another win. I mean, again, there were good games yesterday that were like, these are what real teams look like. Texans-Packers, that was a fun one. Lions-Vikings. Let's see, we had the joe shane game yeah that played out exactly how you thought it would where saquon goes back to new york of course the famous scene from their hard knocks off season where the gm of the giants is deciding

that they're not going to go up to a certain number for Saquon. And maybe in the long run it'll end up being the right decision. Who knows? But their owner, you know, the rich crypt keeper, walks in there and he's like, I sure would hate to see Saquon. I don't know why I just turned into Bill Clinton. Keep going. In an Eagles uniform. And they're like, well, you know, he's not going to Philly.

Well, he did. And then in his first game back, he went 17 for 176. A couple catches as well. Jalen Hurts still looked like ass. Yeah, he has. But even if the Giants keep Saquon at that number, I don't know, what would he have, 15 for 40? That's not a good offense.

He was not going to make or break that offense. I feel like that's the right move to let him walk it might be and it's just but it won't be this year yeah because you have to figure a big time drop off is coming for saquon at some point yeah there's a three-year deal they benched danny d Sort of. I mean, they were getting their ass kicked, but they got Drew Locke. Put on. I did see where the Eagles sacked him eight times. Yes. So maybe it's a little bit of protection for him. They're so screwed.

I love it. I really do. Yeah. Because I needed them to stay bad, and it helps that Philly is struggling too. Like, I think yesterday I went, or the last two weeks, Philly barely beating the Browns and then watching Jalen Hurts yesterday even in a win. I think I've changed my mind from Philly's just kind of asleep and they'll wake up and there's still a real problem in the division to that team's just not very good.

And I need two of these teams to suck so that in week 16 i can convince myself the cowboys still have a shot at the playoffs with two games left because the commanders are now unfortunately actually good yeah need to hear about what daniels is going through yeah and i'm not saying i want to ride Mariota if I'm a fan of the Commanders, but Cliff might be that good when he's just an offensive play car. Mariota was awesome yesterday. Yeah. He looked like he did when he was good.

At Oregon. Yeah, a couple of decent stretches in his career, but the way they were using him, the weapons they have, he's throwing touchdowns to zach ertz who somehow is still he knows that system it's amazing how they've gotten to be a cool and fun team in just one year with dq cliff and jayden daniels it's amazing yeah that's uh that says a lot about the perception of your ownership because you never really want to have a situation where you get fired or leave a company.

And within like three months, everyone's really just like, this is totally different. Like that means you're a cancer. They get a new owner. They get a new quarterback. They get a new coach. They get a hot-ass OC. Their running back got shot and came out to 50 cents mini-min.

Got Scary Terry. Scary Terry's over there. They got Eckler, for whatever that's worth. Question about Cliff. So, what are they, 5-1? 5-2. 5-2? Yeah.

If they run through the NFC East, make the playoffs, make somewhat of a dent, look good in the playoffs, will somebody be seduced again? Maybe not this year, but next year, if that trend continues, will somebody be seduced by Kingsbury enough to offer him another head coaching job? I could see it. Yeah. Sign me up. by Kingsbury enough to offer him another head coaching job? Or do you think that he's... I could see it.

Yeah. Yeah? Sign me up. Even though that now you kind of see what his deal is, that he's a really good OC, but as a head coach, maybe not so much. I don't know if I would be super on board. I'd be on board. Because there's other...

I feel like there's... So would Mike Zimmer be an example of that, where he had head jobs before? I don't know. And now it's just kind of like you are what you are and you kind of stay in that – Yes, but he's old. Like he's 68. So at that point you're like, I'm not starting again with Mike Zimmer.

Whereas with Cliff, he's still young enough to where – and he's an offensive coordinator, which whether this is wise or not, makes owners hard. And it makes GMs very, very fired up about it. So I don't know. I would say he's – I don't know if it's the right move, but he'll get another head coaching job. He'll get another opportunity.

And the team or the organization will tell themselves themselves he probably learned a lot his first time around yeah and you you can't really argue with the results of what he gets from quarterbacks kyler was hurt a lot their team was just in shambles but from freaking Manziel to Baker to Caleb to obviously Patrick Mahomes, and now Jaden is like year one, and they're already talking about the guy being the MVP race. So I don't know. I mean, I don't know if it's a good idea or not, but I'm pretty sure, given what Jaden Daniels has turned in, Cliff is going to get offered another job. Yeah, I mean, the Cardinals, they had a couple years under Cliff where they were decent.

Now they fell off, but I remember them beating the Cowboys pretty bad here. And the best Kyler has looked has been under Cliff. Didn't we have like an RG3 Romo moment with Kyler Murray and Dak where he kind of gave him a keep your head up type thing. You'll get there. That was a low point in Cowboy history when RG3 torched him in a win and get in game.

And he just kind of like patted Romo on his head. He's a rookie. Messed up his hair. He's like, you'll get there, pal. Probably not, but I'm going to say that. Let's see. What else did we have? So Saquon, up his hair he's like you'll get there pal probably not but i'm gonna say that uh let's see what else did we have um so saquon that was a fun one yeah let's talk chiefs uh let's talk chiefs niners niners are okay so when you you look at the nfl you see elite and i think what's going on in the central or the north is pretty special in the NFC.

And then you have obvious garbage. And then you kind of have that gaggle in the middle. And some of the gaggle, they are just what they are. And then the other part of the gaggle are teams that should be good, but they're riddled with injuries. Yeah. that should be good, but they're riddled with injuries. Yeah. Which I think San Francisco kind of falls under that category of a team that should be better than what they are,

but they're just banged up. I think the Cowboys are kind of both. Yeah. I think they're banged up, and they're also kind of garbage. Yeah. I mean, that's – and it's interesting, too, because all of the Cowboys' biggest injuries are on the defensive side of the ball. For the 49ers, it's primarily the offensive side of the ball.

Especially after yesterday when Ayuk left, carted off, and Debo was apparently sick. That felt a little shady to me. He wasn't on the injury report. And then he plays a couple plays and he's sick.

He's been sick like okay well why wasn't i mean i don't care about this because i don't really gamble and i don't play fantasy but if i were really into that i'd be pretty pissed off i think it was a big time weapon and he played three snaps and left the game because he's sick well he didn't get sick at 425 santa clara time he had to have been sick for a couple days. It could have been one of those things, though, when he woke up that morning and you feel great when you wake up. It's like, oh, I think I'm good to go.

And then you try to exert yourself in any way and you realize you're not as good as you thought you were. What if he had diarrhea? He could have had diarrhea, Jake. Dirty, dirty diarrhea. Yeah. Yeah, I guess I would make an exception for diarrhea, guys. It's something you don't argue with. That's true.

If somebody tells you you have diarrhea or they have diarrhea, you just believe it. Yeah. I've never had anybody tell me that I've had diarrhea. If I ever do in your presence, I will tell you. Will you tell me that I have diarrhea? No, like. Danny, you have diarrhea.

You know, no one's ever said that to me before. I'm going to speak it into existence. Like you're a magician. You have diarrhea. Obviously, no C-Mac. Ayuk goes down. Like I said, Debo's sick. Heck, Ricky, I don't even know how to say the white kid's name.

Is it not Purcell? Purcell, yeah. had to step in for him make some plays yesterday and he just came off the uh injury reserve for being shot yeah he was supposed to be their debo replacement well yeah without all the weapons purdy looks looks pretty pedestrian. One of my favorite things in sports is how we just, when we're, like at some point I had to be like I was wrong about Brock Purdy because the results were just too overwhelming. And I could say like, yeah, but he's got all these weapons. And they're like, yeah, but look at all these plays he makes off schedule and his athleticism.

The more I watched him and the more they won and he played well, eventually I was just kind of like, all right, F it. This guy's actually good. I had to concede to Dan. And now we get to see what it looks like when you don't have, like, the best five skill position players grouped together you could possibly imagine. Pretty spare. Yeah.

Looked pretty spare. Holds onto the ball too long. Inaccurate throws. Oh, we didn't mention Trent Williams got kicked out of that game too. That was BS. Well, yeah. I get second guy always gets caught when it comes to scuffles and whatnot, but for ejecting someone, I think that means they looked at it.

And if they looked at it, then you should be able to see he got punched in the helmet first. That should have been a double ejection. Also, I'm not really sure. I don't remember who the player was. I'm not really sure that if there's a single digit on my jersey or it starts with a two or a three, I'm not hitting Trent Williams in the head. Yeah. It's a bad plan.

He's like Zeus. Feels like a 90s number head. Yeah. It's a bad plan. He's like Zeus. Feels like a 90s number thing. Yeah. You're a little guy, little fella. But the Chiefs, man, they're doing this every week. Why were they? They were underdogs. That was the silliest line in the weekend.

Well, I can think of a couple reasons, maybe. One, they've barely been winning. Barely. They're on the road and you had the 49ers are hungry. Because one, they were sitting at 500 and two, Mahomes has beat them four straight times including twice in the Super Bowl. And it was only like three, right? If that. Maybe like plus one or something.

Well, it's not like the Chiefs played great. Mahomes had a tip pass for an interception. He had a bad throw, but he also had some ridiculous plays, including probably the play of the game because it set up them to score to go ahead. A lot of people are upset about this today, but it was the 33-yard scramble.

Yeah, I don't quite know what to think either. I think, and I'm not just saying this because he's a close personal friend of mine. Because you get to call him Patrick. Yeah, but I think what the rules are, you just use them. And it's the same reason why if James Harden played for your team, you would learn to like it. They're going to call the game how they're going to call the game. And if you didn't see the play, what we're speaking of is

he takes off to the left edge, and when he's four or five, maybe closer to 10 yards past the line of scrimmage, he starts to do his slow down, chop your feet like you're running out of bounds move while he's still in bounds, which most of the time means a defender that's coming at you will let up because they know if you hit Patrick Mahomes at full speed when he's even a step out of bounds, it's 15 yards at minimum. So he just started throttling down and the defender stopped and he just slipped insideottling down and the defender stopped and he just like slipped

inside of him and kept running. He's like, yeah, oh, I'm stopping and you are going to stop as well because you think you can't hit me because I'll sell this and bitch about it. And the guy just ran right past him and he kept running. It kind of happened twice. There were two dudes who could have earholed him

and there was a bunch of, you know, football players from the 60s and 70s yesterday that were like, ah, football's woke and gay now. This kid would have been in a hospital had he tried this in my day. Did people protest saying, he can't do that? Like, he could just be really demonstrative on the field with the officials afterwards? No, I don't think so. I don't think so because it's not illegal.

Yeah. Because the other thing he does, which I've always thought was hilarious, that more people don't do it, I've mentioned it a thousand times, is just the flag football move. Because when you get to the edge in flag football, if your quarterback knows what he's doing and he's pretty athletic, once he hits the edge, zero people out there have the spatial awareness of a real football player. They do

not, and the field is not always marked like the way that an NFL field is marked. People do not remember where the line of scrimmage was. So you'll routinely see it. Our quarterback is awesome at it. He will pump fake on the edge whether he's six yards

past the line of scrimmage, and every single time a DB will just jump up in the air and he'll run past him. And he'll do it again. He'll do it in midfield, like in the middle of the field. It's like, where's he going to throw it? It works every time. And Mahomes still does it because in that moment you're like, oh.

So he did both those on that play and then set up a touchdown. so he did both those on that play and then set up a touchdown and he also just absolutely trucked a 49er safety at the goal line for a score and kind of did a little standover that was tough malik mustafa i think is his name he had like a dozen tackles but in a very cool athlete move when he got to his phone after the game, he immediately tweeted, this is the safety for the Niners, tweeted out the meme of that guy, the gif, just saying, I'm not going to lie, I got cooked out there. That's cool. He knew.

There's going to be an image of me standing, Mahomes standing over me. The side-by-side of them without their shirts on is pretty hilarious. Yeah, that guy just looks like a dauntus. Yeah, Mahomes has got Coors Light belly in the locker room. He's been fishing at 530. Yeah, right. With Uncle Ken. Let's see.

Anything else for you? Because the biggest story of the day probably was Jameis and Deshaun. So we're going to save that for after. We do have a twofer again tonight. Is this every week? Are they trying to do it most weeks, I guess? What, the doubleheader Monday night football game? Were they staggering by what?

Is it an hour or 90 minutes? They've done it two different ways. This one is 45 minutes. They have had them like a West Coast, East Coast game where they've done it that way too. But I don't really understand the rhyme or reason behind it. I guess I'll take it. This looks like it's the last one.

Okay. There have been way more this year. Am I crazy? Another one in week 15. But, yeah, it feels like that was a week one thing, but now it's – Yeah, they always did it week one. What's the logic just to get more eyes from offering multiple markets? Probably.

Yeah. Because you can only show a few games on Sunday in each place, so I guess why not? What are the viewing options? So typically Monday Night Football is only on one network. How are they doing this? I'm pretty sure that there have been times before where one was on ABC and one was on ESPN.

Okay, still part of the same parent company and i think espn has all of it in there somehow yeah i think this one is espn and if you want to watch chargers cardinals tonight which you don't i don't i believe that one is espn plus but big abc and big espn will have joe and troys-Buccaneers, which is a pretty tasty matchup. Hell yeah. The only thing that stuck out to me was Doug Peterson kept his job in the second half because the Jaguars were down 10-0, I think, to the Patriots. They were.

In London. They didn't get left there. Didn't they spend the whole week out there? They've been there before, the Jaguars? They've definitely been there before. This season? They're the team of the U.K. Yeah, they played the Bears.

That sounds right. I don't know. I can't keep track. I'm pretty sure they played there this season because that's the time that I was telling you guys that the TV was on early one Sunday morning. My roommate walked in and was like, are you watching women's football? Because Trevor TV was on early one Sunday morning and my roommate walked in and was like, are you watching women's football? Because Trevor Lawrence was on the screen. That's funny. He had never seen the guy before. So he just looked at him on the sideline and thought, Hey, that's a nice looking lady. You want to talk about Russ last night? Yeah, here, I'll play a little

bit of Russ audio. I thought this was funny. It's not really funny. It's just Russ is so generic and so – I think this guy I follow, Andrew Brandt, former agent, tweets a lot. He was like, this is like if AI created a quarterback. Russ, first game for you since the preseason. What will allow you to get acclimated quickly? Man, just being with the fellas, man, celebrating. What an opportunity it is.

It's a great Sunday night football. We got one play at a time, be locked in, great fundamentals, and let's go get it. What's the biggest obstacle that the Jets' defense presents for you? They fly around. They're not on the play. They create turnovers and all that. We got to protect the football, go make big plays, and it's going to be a great battle tonight.

What's the most important part of your routine from now until kickoff? Man, just stay in the zone, you know. Stay in the zone, listen to my worship music, and let's get it. Best of luck. Enjoy. Yep. Russell Wilson clearly in the zone. Russell Wilson clearly on cocaine.

Yeah. Just listen here. This is for the real heads out there. As I throw it back to the studio, you get a very subtle Garrett Goofy laugh. Best of luck. Enjoy. Yeah, it was a weird night. I mean, they got down. Aaron Rodgers sucked at the beginning and then kind of got

hot. Russell Wilson threw, I tweeted this last night, early in the game, the worst pass I've ever seen attempted in an NFL game. Like, he was attempting to throw something out to the flats. Kind of, if I recall, it was like a bubble, but it was

a throw that would have been caught, like, behind the line of scrimmage. It was not like a downfield throw where it's like, oh, he threw it into the stands. Dude, it looked like when Tebow was trying to learn how to throw. Like at the NFL level and you would see those. It looked like me trying to throw the way you're supposed to throw. I can't do it.

The receiver just looked at the ground like, what? What was that? What? And on the next play, it wasn't much better. And I'm like, dude, this is awful. He's so done. He went from let him cook to cooked. And then't much better. I'm like, dude, this is awful. He's so done. He went from let him cook to cooked. Then he got going.

He looked pretty good. He looked way better than he ever looked in Denver. He throws a very catchable deep ball. Pickens likey. Pickens was great. They're starting to use that giant ass tight end they have. Boy, that guy is a beast. Didn't Aaron Rodgers have a tipped interception that kind of wasn't his fault?

Yeah. Late in the game or at some point? Yeah, but he wasn't very good past the first quarter, maybe first quarter and a half, but it was not. That team just sucks. Devontae did nothing. I don't even want to see what targets he had. God, I was so – we were talking about this.

I had nine. I just saw he had three for 30 and thought, boy, he had nine. I was talking with Skin yesterday about Devontae. It's like we were both hoping for a 12-catch, 219-yard game with two touchdowns. Like just to do kind of what Derrick henry's been doing to this team all year it's not quite the same but mentally uh marty cooper had a pretty big day he had a really good day for a guy who didn't know the playbook so much so that's true that one of his uh one of the dudes he was he was cooper was in the slot and the guy on the outside like josh allen changed to play at

the line and marty's like i don't have a clue what he's talking about and very youth football style the receiver on his side kind of like did the this way in that way run a post and he ran it and scored he's open always find so much pleasure when players that jerry just undervalues or passes on do well on other teams. I love it. God, Twitter was funny about that one because it was, I don't know, like a gif of Amari, like running a route and having the pass hit you in the hands was like just worshiping him because he's come from Deshaun Watson to now Josh Allen. That's correct.

I mean, dude, he went from – to go from Cleveland to Baltimore at this stage of the game – Or excuse me, to Buffalo. You're not going to get much luckier than that. Yeah. I'm with you, though. I would have liked to have seen a big day from Devontae, and maybe they'll figure it out, but they're screwed.

Their season's done. So if they want to turn around and trade Mike Williams, are you into that? Sure. What's his contract? You know what? At this point, I don't really care. I just think the Cowboys have to do something on the offensive side of the ball playmaker-wise or they have no shot.

Because he's kind of the odd man out there. He is. Man, he's pretty much the odd man out there. He is. Man, he's pretty much. He signed a one-year deal. Okay. It's just a matter of when the Jets realize they're screwed. Well, at two and five. The only thing is, that division sucks.

So they're not going to win it, but they still get to play the Patriots and Dolphins, I would say. At least three or four more games for them. But who knows? Alright, well, we will talk about the scene in Cleveland, Deshaun Watson,

the fans, and Jameis' comments afterward. We will do all that with Dan after the news. But, Blake, it's your turn next. Do you want to do the read? Yeah. I thought you'd be like, oh yeah, viewer mail.

It's brought to you by... Lone Star. There you go. Lone Star, man. The official beer of Texas. Great with barbecue, great with anything, really. And what they're pushing right now is Lone Star merch, which is pretty badass. And according to Danny, made in Taiwan?

No, man. Right downtown Fort Worth, bro. Okay. Locally sourced. Real organic t-shirts for your comfort and fit. Yeah. Go to LoneStarBeer.com. Use the code DUMBZONE21 to get 21% off merchandise.

Why 21? Why? Got to be 21 or older to purchase. That makes sense. Yeah. Thanks, Jake. You're welcome. But look, let's be honest.

Lone Star's obviously got the best merch game in the biz, but there's so much more than that. Have you tried their beer, Blake? Quite delicious. Awesome. Yeah. I'm a red can guy. Yep. I'm trying to watch my girlish figure because bikini season's coming up next year, so I'm

kind of going with the blue can. Well, I'm still working on my before pictures, so I'm just going to stay red can. But I've had some blue can. Very good. Lone Star Light, really, really good. So good. So authentically Texan Lone Star Light, really, really good. So good. So authentically Texan Lone Star beer. Thank you very much.

Oh, yeah. Wait a minute, Uncle Hotmail. It's an interesting strategy to really, really puff up your before pictures. Yeah, yeah. So when you get in shape, it's like, look what I did. Yeah. Brilliant. Not a ton here today. Shout out to Profits and

Outlaws by the way. Contact them for all your music needs. I bet they have good t-shirts too. They do. They had a kick-ass studio. I know that. They definitely have that. We should go back out there soon. This says dear Vulva Valedictorian.

All right. New leader. Love it. New leader. My son Gary is celebrating his Columbine body count, minus Dylan and Eric's birthday. His leader is puberty blocker Blake. This is from Corey.

Jake's ferret head popped up when you said Columbine it was a big event in history to be honest with you Columbine probably impacted my life more than 9-11 if we're just talking about

actual brass tacks impact I might even go so far as to say that Columbine was my 9-11. If you think about it. Okay, wait. What year was Columbine? 2000. Are you sure about that?

Was it before 9-11? Oh, yeah. Of course it was. How old were you 24 years ago? It was 99. Were you 15? About to turn 15. Okay.

Yeah, that makes sense to me because you were in school. Yeah. You probably had a bigger connection to that. I've talked to guys that are about your age, and their experience of remembering 9-11 was kind of like, huh. It was the same for me when the Challenger exploded, and I was a senior in high school when that went down, and I remember watching that going, huh.

Yeah. It didn't impact me like it did people that were three, five, ten years older than me. Now, eventually, as just absolutely neoliberal douchebag as it sounds, I would say 9-11 is kind of why I went to college. Because I got very interested in like whoa what happened here you're trying to avoid a potential draft well that honestly was in my mind but also I just got really interested in learning about stupid stuff like politics all over the world did you get a poli sci degree that's amazing my master's is from the journalism department, but with a focus on political communication. Wow.

I have three takeaways from 9-11 from my day. Dude, that feels like it should be on cold pizza or hot coffee or something. And now Blake's three sizzling 9-11 takeaways. If you don't know Blake, you might want to listen to these. I remember having to go to the gas station because my dad was convinced there was going to be a run on gas. What is it with you and your family and gas shortage freakouts? I remember my football practice was canceled that day.

Yeah, it was hot. Because I think they were going to drive a plane into our youth football field. Yep. And then lastly. Typically people say fly a field. Yep. And then lastly... Dude, typically people say fly a plane, but... Yeah. And lastly, I was pissed because PBS did not show Arthur that afternoon. Arthur? You were an Arthur guy.

I think I was a little too old for Arthur. And that was my afternoon jam when I got home from school. When I ask friends who are pilots what they do, they say I drive planes. I drove bus. No, but 9-11 was wild at my school, though, because, as discussed, there were parents getting their kids out of school.

I'm like, look, I haven't seen the Al-Qaeda dossier, but I'm pretty sure Richland High School is not on page one in the event that this thing spirals. Right, or if there's an unidentified yet fourth plane right fifth plane uh that's right we've got the richland campus locked on yeah you're probably safe yeah any dallas community college is probably in good shape man you guys are talking about the gas shortage man rob and i lived lived that thing in the 70s. I remember my parents needing to get gas

during the Carter administration, right? I think it was. It was 79, I'm pretty sure. That was two miles around, or a mile around the gas station. The gas lines were insane. Odds and evens, there you go. Water to your yard.

You get gas on an odd or even day. That's right. My mom would get up at like 6 a.m., 5 a.m. and go to the gas station. And probably not get home until after lunch. Yeah, right. My mom would get up at like 6 a.m., 5 a.m. Dang. And go to the gas station. And probably not get home until after lunch. Yeah, yeah. She was gone at least two, three hours. You know what rules is that now, like 45 years later,

the only thing you see lines like that for is if an In-N-Out or like a Portillo's opens. No kidding. Like just beef. The only thing. Or a Jollibee or something like that. Right, right. Yeah. Anyways, Columbine.

Back to you, Blake. Dear Uncle Twat Tantalizer. It's a strong day right here, folks. Not bad. Today is my Michael Jordan with the Birmingham Barons birthday. I was not woken up in that special way, but I took care of myself already. Gross. My leaders are Jake Scorpion Toe and any guest that isn't Sarah Heppola.

Day 2, DF 1193, Scott's murder. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Isn't she scheduled to come back soon? I think I saw her on the calendar. She's been canceled. That's it, boys. That's good stuff, Blake. Now, with more on Columbine, here's Jake.

That was a wild day, too, because I remember, with more on columbine here's jay that was a wild day too because uh i remember let's see some of these events kind of run together for me but i but i do remember it was definitely like a we didn't really know what lockdown was at the time but every school was on high alert like yeah i'm sure these 16 year old kids who were playing Doom every day had coordinated an entire network of sleeper cells around the nation. But it was a thing that we knew about at school that it had happened. It's not like we got home and found out. And from there, yes, things changed drastically.

And from there, yes, things changed drastically. Of course, one of the things that people my age experienced right away where we had to start wearing IDs no matter what. Why? So they could identify your body. Jesus. That's why? They didn't tell you that, but I pretty quickly figured out, okay, why? Well, they don't want people coming in who shouldn't be here.

That wasn't the case at Columbine. Yeah, right? So that's exactly. You could have an ID. If you could get a gun in, you could get a gun in. Yeah, think about it. In World War II in Vietnam, you didn't wear dog tags so you could remember your blood type. Right, yeah.

And there was a reason there were two of them. And I'm sure that may be a little bit of an extreme take on that, but I do believe that's part of it. They were multi-purposed, and that was one of the purposes. Yeah, and they would get all over your ass for that. That was, you're going to ISS for the rest of the day, or you've got to buy another one, and they would charge you $20 or something for them.

No kid's just walking around with $20. charge you $20 or something for them. No kids just walking around with $20. That was a big, and I chronically misplace and lose things. These guys know that. And it started way before any sort of earth-based or grain-based substance. I would lose,

I just lose shit. I don't know. The ID was always a problem for me, but probably the story I've told more than any other was when I, and we're trying to fill time right now, by the way, but this is a good story. Just, just wait. Uh, when I went from football to basketball, the first year that I did both and we had IDs. Basketball was in the morning and I was used to football in the afternoon and some kids in football in the afternoon, they wouldn't

shower after practice. They would just go home. I would shower every time. It's disgusting. You put your street clothes back on after that? Some people would. Stinking? Their parents would get them then or they would take the bus or if they were old enough to drive, they would drive.

I would shower and put on uh like gym clothes every day and we would dick around in the shower you know i bet it was one of those uh you know it was just a long open shower with either four or five poles that each had four or six heads and they were spaced out you know and so there were two rows of them and we would just just dick around to like an insane degree and we would soap up the whole like midway of it and you just get a slight running start from one end and just slide on your ass the whole way to the other end. Teenager, naked, slip and slide. Naked, slip and slide. And, you know, the whole time there's like 10 other dudes in there at their shower.

So you're just flying by like waist length. Whoa. Yeah. Spinning. Yeah. So we were just animals. And then when basketball season started, a couple of us, most of the kids who played basketball didn't play football and so when we went over there

we realized, hey these dudes don't like shower naked they were way way more uptight about it and it was in the morning and they would shower in gym shorts if they showered at all, some of them would just wash their hair and style it, you know, pop out the LA

looks but if anybody showered, they would just wash their hair and style it, you know, pop out the LA looks. But if anybody showered, they would shower with their shorts on. They didn't get naked. This is 9th or 10th grade. Did you ever ask anybody what the purpose was? No, what I did was immediately get naked. And? As one of one or two people who did that.

Did you inspire change? No, I just tried to creep everyone out. who did that. Did you inspire change? No. I just tried to creep everyone out. And one way that I did that was I would shower naked and hang my ID on my dick

and I would walk around and be like, is anybody, they're going to suspend me. Has anyone seen my ID? Is there over there like, they don't even want to be naked and I've got a lanyard.

Hanging off your ween. Yeah. And then you start helicoptering it. It was a different time. It was a different time. I think you probably get some sort of sexual charge for that now. There's no way that somebody could have looked at what I had going on and been like, I'm being hazed.

I don't think anybody felt threatened. But, yeah, that's what I did with my ID. All right. We'll step away for a minute for those on the live stream. And when we continue, we'll be joined by Big Mac himself. This week, they come really, really, really close. Are you more of the last half full coming off this loss or do you still kind of feel in that same way? The glass is always full because just because it's maybe half full of water, it's still full of air. Dope, dope, dope, dope, dope, dope, dope, dope, dope, dope, dope, dope, dope, dope, dope, dope. Puppet.

Thank you, Jameis. Thank you, Blake. Thank you, Sarah. In a minute, we're going to be joined by Dan McDowell. He's in Cleveland. But first, we're going to tell you about one of our fine sponsors here, one that Blake is very familiar with, one that I'm about to become very familiar with.

That is OwnWell. Oh, yeah? Taking the plunge? Oh, yeah. You know why? There's no reason not to. OwnWell is going to help you save money on your property taxes, and if they can't, you won't pay them. 86% of people will save money on their property taxes. They will they can't, you won't pay them. 86% of people will save money on their

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why not do it? It's property time in Texas. I got my notice yesterday for this year's taxes and you got until Jan 31. Higher than last year. Yeah. It's only going one way danny i'm doing this too you said it's three minutes to register and put a timer on it get in there really put a timer on it now you may be thinking i got three minutes you know what i don't have time for

getting all of the whatever it's called documents documents and. Documents and DCAD or whatever that website is to get comparable properties in your neighborhood and wait in line on a phone call to talk to some dude that's going to save you zero money. Got to pretend like you're Mr. Smith goes to Washington and you're standing there in front of some government body. That's not for you.

You need one website, Danny. What is it, Jake? Ownwell.com slash partners slash the dumb zone. All right? That's what you do. Tonight. You save money. Hundreds of dollars on average.

You can do anything you want with that money. Connect with Ownwell tonight. Ownwell. What's up? Oh, y'all are waiting on this, aren't you? Ownwell. What's up? Oh, y'all are waiting on this, aren't you? I think it was worth it. I think it was worth it. All right, let's go now live to Cleveland.

We hope. What's up, dude? Pick up the energy, boys. Come on. Let's go. We're going to do a two-minute spot. Let's make them a little more exciting. We have the same energy as a man who decided to not make his bed today. Yeah, what is that? Don't you listen to Jordan?

Who makes their bed? Don't you listen to Jordan Peterson? I'll just be getting in it tonight. Come on, man. That's so unlike you. I just had a romp. I had a romp in there. You haven't had a romp in maybe ever, but definitely not in 30 years.

Rompin' with the left hand. It's all great. All fun here. I'm disappointed to learn you don't make up your bed. Excuse me? I'm disappointed to learn you don't make your bed. You seem like that type of guy. That bothers me.

Huh? You just seem like that type of guy. Do I? Yeah. No, no one goes in your bedroom. No reason to make the bed at all i completely agree it's always the most a lot one of the most illogical rules that uh you know your parents had growing up make sure you make your bed who's gonna go in there except for me again later and then mess it

up you should set your standards high and crap oh man i bet you at least i did that. Like, okay, whatever, Marine. Marine. Jarhead. Go back. Go back to where? Vietnam. I don't know. Where you came from. Well, what's going on in Clee?

I'm reporting live from a suburb of Cleveland, Ohio. This is Westlake, Ohio. As you know, I'm back. Oh, yes. So actually, let me, I have a huge game report for you. But first, let me just give you an update on my hotel. So I told you on Friday the location of the hotel was very close to a very famous landmark here in the northeast Ohio area. However, it was unfortunate I didn't get to choose my room.

And I was looking the opposite way. I think I looking over like some kind of a fish restaurant or something so which is nice uh but it wasn't what i was the fish i was looking for so um uh last night i got in my room rob we can fire up this video i actually uh this is when i checked back in because I left for a day to go to my buddy Joe's. Slept over his house Saturday night. It is a nice room. It is a nice room, yeah. Look at the beds. Double queens. I like two queens.

Oh, yeah. I like two queens over a king nowadays. 100%. You know what I do with that? Yeah, just why don't you walk us through first. I see it right there, baby. A beacon. Okay, we walk over to the picture window. What I do with that? Yeah, just why don't you walk us through first? I see it right there, baby, a beacon. Okay, we walk over to the picture window. What do you call that, a bay window?

Not a bay. And now we are looking at the majesty of not only the Cheesecake Factory. But the parking lot. Which we love. But yeah, let's focus on the parking lot of the Cheesecake Factory. And it's not just limited. If you remember being there right behind the Cheesecake Factory. And it's not just limited if you remember being there right behind the cheese. It actually extends out. So like, where was Baker and Baker Head Girl? Were

they over here by the trees? Were they up close to the Crocker Road? Who knows? Were they right behind the Cheesecake Factory so that the back of her ponytail could be illuminated by that red, orangish glow? You know what I'm saying? Maybe they were even feeling some electrons from the Cheesecake Factory flowing right through her and then his electrons. He flowed through her. Yeah, yeah, you know.

And then, you know, the vape situation. Sure. We remember everything. Yeah. So, yeah, that's my room is now over. It's the most scenic, the most coveted scenic room. It's the highest floor, high atop the sixth floor of this hotel, overlooking the Cheesecake Factory parking lot. So if he's out there, somebody's out there tonight, I'll be watching. I'm scoping it out.

I'm like a rear window. That's notoping it out. I'm like a rear window. That's not a good reference. I'm like someone on the wire. I'm like Bunk on a stakeout. Okay. Did Bunk ever do a stakeout? I'm interested in the go back to the same hotel. Is that...

I mean, I guess if you know they have yogurt, why mess with perfection? But I think I like to mix it up. Yeah, no. I mean, I know if you know they have yogurt, why mess with perfection? But I think I like to mix it up. Yeah, no, I mean, I know it's a good hotel. It's close to where my mom lives. Yeah, the two queens is definitely the move. I don't know if I had started doing this before I learned this from Sam Anderson and the Quaker City Nighthawks, or if I just started.

I eat on that bed. I'll have a food bed. Oh, okay. And mine is more of a, that's where I lay my clothes and all that kind of stuff. Yeah, I like to have a bed over there that I just, I'll go. Got the dirty clothes pile, the clean clothes pile. If I order a pizza and remember to get it when I'm at a hotel, I'll eat over there.

A new Jake should remember that. There's not really anywhere to eat in most hotel rooms. They might have the little desk, but I like to just lounge and watch TV and eat and be like, well, now I'm just going to go to the place where I actually sleep because it doesn't have tomato sauce everywhere.

When the maid comes in, they think that I'm having probably... Bloody bung. sauce everywhere. Now, when the maid comes in, they think that I'm having like, you know, probably... Yeah, bloody bung. You don't want bloody bung in a hotel. Out of state, Dan. Guy from experience. You do not want bloody bung in a hotel. I'm surprised that you, being a

tallish man like myself, wouldn't opt for the king, the single king, because I love a king-sized bed alone it's the best i used to i used to but now i do like that extra bed just to throw shit on sure you thought that's the that's the effing bed i'd like to do a little effing in that bed and soil that bed up and you had just said i did think of you yesterday so i was trying to get you to continue your oh i'm sorry i thought of you yesterday eating actually because um i know you love the car tray oh yeah and you love taco bell so i've recently um become a real big fan of the taco bell black

bean uh crunch wrap yeah hey this ain't your grandpa's Taco Bell Bud Do you eat that while you're on your skateboard With your mountain dune on the other hand So I went So um My buddy Joe lives on the way the other side of town You know 40 minutes on the other side of Cleveland

This is 40 minutes on the west side of Cleveland Um He lives on the affordable side yeah of the metroplex uh so um anyway i ordered a couple of those babies and i'm eating them while driving and it's a little you know messy and i just thought jake would never do would jake if he had this you know hour and a half drive ahead of him and it was getting to be dusk and all that kind of stuff, would he just park at Taco Bell, eat it, and then go? Without a doubt, yeah. Would he live life to the fullest like I do?

No, and especially given the way you drive. I'm surprised that that's ever even an option. But I guess someone who drives aggressively is just living aggressively you're extreme not aggressively someone who drives I was driving with my knee who's not conservative about it

I am and the other thing too is Taco Bell one of the things I really enjoy is their sauces big fire guy big Diablo guy what I like to do is order the chips and cheese, dump a bunch of Diablo in there, mix it up with the chip. Now I got like a smoky queso

type thing. And I got to have that. You're not getting that while you're driving. You need a tray to take full advantage of the sauces. Yeah. All right. If you're a professional eat driver like myself, you would never order nachos because they're not practical for. Yeah. That's why I can order them and I sit in my car

and eat them. And the best thing is when someone pulls up next to me and they try, they're trying to eat and they got beans falling out the ass of the burrito. It's all over them. And they look over and they see me and they're like, oh my God. You know, it's like when we go to Asia and see their public transit. We're like, how did they figure this out? They look at me and they're like, that guy's from the future. Then why even go to the drive-thru? Why not just dine in? Okay,

so actually the drive-thru was five deep, so I went in and I go up to order and the kid goes, you can't order here. You can only go order at the kiosk. Yeah, I've run into that. I'm like, what? Blake ran into it on our road trip.

Since we renovated, we don't take money. I'm like, well, but they could take my credit card over there right at the window. What if we pretend that, like, so now I got into a big thing with this kid who walked me over to the kiosk, and I'm like, I know how to use a kiosk, dude. I know the concept. I can press buttons and stuff. I'm just saying you're standing literally five feet away from where she is. You both have the register.

You could just say, here's my order. And then we just handle it this way. And he's like, no. Then he's like no then he's like uh and he's you know he's 18 yeah and he's like i just work here man i got i'm sorry i'm so sorry i know i'm not i'm just saying why i'm debating with him about the ceo of taco bell's decision right months ago yeah the one to to phase his job out entirely at some point. For eat driving, Taco Bell

wins over, say, Bueno, because for me, you want one bite of the burrito, and then you just bite the corner off of the fire sauce and just squirt it directly in your mouth. You'd be cocky by hot sauce? 100%. But with the Taco Bell,

it's like you're doing a shot of salsa i don't like that at all the lids that going everywhere and there's sauce on your dashboard you don't want that so yeah taco bell for driving while eating i support you dan and the crunch wrap is the way to go it's very very good they've stepped the game up so what time did you get out there what time were you in the muni lot okay so um uh you know had to go pick up a guy and then pick up a parking pass as you know i love my buddy joe because he works at the with the calves so we get free parking at the calves arena so we had to go you know all this stuff and uh finally got there we probably got there two hours before game time to the parking pass went and had a slice at Slice.

Do you remember that? Of course. Is that where we went? The same exact pizza place. Yeah, with Joe. Had a slice of pizza there. Enjoyed every second of that. That's where I took a picture, Blake.

We didn't notice it before. They have a payphone in there. And we were marveling at the payphone. Like, does it work? Does anyone use this payphone? So we took some pictures of the payphone like because like now that's like a monument um that's like the autogram statue uh in cleveland there isn't there's an actual payphone and people come from all over just to see it um so we just kind of walked through the tailgating areas, uh, but then, you know, didn't, uh, partake or anything. Cause Joe was, uh, getting, he was doing the media thing.

So he wanted to get the pregame media meal and I was invited by Sven, you know, Sven, my, uh, six foot seven friend. Uh, he invited me into a suite and if I'm going to go to a game. Yeah, we know. The suite. In fact, if anybody's tuning in today and anybody's like, oh, I'd love to invite the guys to a game sometime. I'm busy. Unless if you're like, hey, we actually we have a suite. Okay.

Oh, really? A suite. Like that's kind of the way God intended you to watch a game. All right. Let's find this limit, though. Wings? Dallas Wings? A Dallas Wings suite?

There's no way they have that. Sure. I'll say yeah. Well, Dan was a big Latricia Trammell fan, so now that they're parting ways. Puss up. They ran off their Roseanne. Yeah. They did.

You guys see they fired Roseanne. Yeah, They did. You guys see they fired Roseanne. Yeah, I did. We just got to know her. Yeah, I know. And I'm going to have to reorganize this whole thing now because what if they hire someone for somewhere else, you know? Like, it's insane. It could be anybody.

Becky Hammond. So this suite, before I get to football, had a bathroom, like a private bathroom. That's there for one reason and one reason only. Doing it? Local Kanye. So when you walk in, there's a sink, and then there's a toilet next to it, right? I'm with you. Is this a standard bathroom?

Is there a mirror, too? So there's a mirror. Wow. But the mirror extends. it's not just behind the sink it extends it's the whole length of the bathroom so behind the toilet so i'm on i'm on the road so i don't sit down on the road i sit down at home of course um so i'm standing but now you're standing watching yourself and watching your wiener. That's no good. Go to the bathroom. I'm like, this is too much mirror. You are wasting, first of all, valuable mirror money that you could just cut all these mirrors

in half. Mirror money. It's wrecking the economy. Yeah. Well, they've double paid for mirrors in this whole stadium. If they have a mirror behind every sweet toilet, you could have saved a lot of money in making this stadium and therefore less PSL price and all that kind of stuff. And if somebody's washing their hands

and you're urinating, with the double mirror, they can peer over and have instant access to your ween and be able to see you. There shouldn't be two in there. There's no two in there, unless it's a couple. Or good friends like me and Jake. We would go in there together for sure. So anyway, just a word to the people making the sweets in Cleveland. I don't want to see myself doing that.

And I'm like, gosh, that's small? Does it look that small to her? Like, gosh, I'm trying to work it up a little bit. So we go in the stadium, and my first game, I don't know if you guys ever do this, but I really like the obscure jersey game or whatever game I go to. Sure.

I did this when we went to see the Cowboys in California, Blake. I don't know if you remember me asking you to check on jerseys. I did. But I came up with I saw Joe Jurevicius. Wow. That's a good poll. Well, first of all, would you be able to guess the top three jerseys at

a Browns game here in 2024? The top three jerseys. Baker is not one of the top three. He might have cracked the top five. Okay, Chubb. Chubby's. Chubb.

Yeah, okay, so Chubb. This would be really- There's two real obvious ones. Miles Garrett. That's obvious one number two. Bernie Kosar. Nick Chubb is beloved, by the way. Yeah, I know.

He loved it. He wrote like a Players' Tribune thing about how he never wants to leave Cleveland. Oh, he did? Yeah. He's all the rage. And then he came back this week. It was so... The contrast of him and Watson had to be interesting.

Oh, my God. The third one, I think you'll be interesting. Oh, my God. The third one, I think you'll never guess. Okay, so is it Flacco? No, he's somebody currently on the team. Oh. Hold on. David Njoku. Not Njoku.

Okay, hold on. Although I have a picture of him. I don't know if you guys saw him walking into the game and his outfit. Apparently he does this every game. You can pull that up if you want, Rob. I saw that earlier. Yeah. David Njoku.

He looks like a gay cowboy. Man, I just. Yeah, his bid is to, I guess he does this every game. I just would think you need a little more, I don't know. Maybe some all pros? Is it Joel Batonio? He looks like he's in the Village People. Jameis. Yeah. No. Damn.

Okay. Well... We lost Dan. No. You still there, Dan? I'm here. Oh. Yeah, he's there. We can't see him anymore. Okay, so who was it? Denzel Ward. Can you hear me? Yeah there we can't see him anymore okay so who was it Denzel Ward can you hear me yep

yeah we can now really yeah I guess he's a first round pick he's been there for a minute but I would have thought yeah he's

multiple pro bowl guy but yeah that is an interesting one I wouldn't have thought that would have uh the third most uh most seen jersey.

Anyway, Joe Jarvisius. The first thing I did was just find, I was just looking like, all right, is there a white that I'm missing? You know they sold Peyton Hill's jerseys like they were hotcakes. That's my next one on the obscure jersey game. Yeah. I saw two or three of those. What about throwbacks? They got your Jim Brown and a couple ofernies uh but colt mccoy

okay interesting like who's buying a colt mccoy a colt mccoy browns jersey that's very strange right someone has bought someone bought that phil dawson which makes a little sense he's from lake island yeah longhorn long time uh browns kicker he was was there for, you know, what, 15, 20 years? So that kind of makes sense, but it's still the kicker. I don't know. It does make me think I need a Brandon Aubrey. I was going to say, I think we could get away with a Brandon Aubrey, but other than that, and I would tell Brandon this,

if you don't have him on your show or you're not related to him, you're probably kind of a loser if you buy a kicker's jersey. Benny Testaverde. Sure, of course. Which seemed pretty obscure. And then Joe Hayden. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, he had a run.

Did he? Kind of. Not according to Dan. So pregame. This was apparently it is Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction weekend. I did see something about that on the television during football, a commercial for it. So that was kind of the theme of the game. In fact, who was it?

Oh, it was Denzel Ward made a big defensive play like a broke up a pass and then did a big like his celebration is a big guitar swinging his arm around like he's playing the guitar. So I don't know if he does that every game or if it's he's done it before. Okay, maybe it's not special then to rock and roll, but it's special to Cleveland. You know, he's just tributing the cleveland rock thing yeah is he i think which i'm totally i'm totally on board with something new than barking and dogs yeah because uh in fact just this weekend they announced they are they have approved they're moving the stadium to Brook Park, which is kind of near the airport.

It's out of downtown. The stadium has been downtown, of course, since, what, the 1930s or something like that. That sucks. And it does suck because it is actually good for business downtown. Now, who is it? Jimmy Haslam will go ahead and just build his own Texas Live, but we'll probably call it something different right around the stadium, and he'll make all the money, and you'll have to drive out to a suburb and all that kind of stuff.

But now they'll have paintball downtown, Jake. It's always going to be available. They will have waterfront development. I've been hearing it's a good thing. And they're going to have a dome, so they're going to get a Super Bowl, so that'll be great, right? Oh, I cannot wait to listen to the media bitch about that. Cleveland in February.

Good. Great. But it was my point at the game to anybody that would listen to me was they need to retire the dog bit. Don't bring the dog pound to Brook Park. It shouldn't even be at this stadium. That was the late 1980s, early 90s Browns, which I was a big fan of. They started it. They started the barking.

We threw milk bones. I brought milk bones to a game. Of course. I have actually carried milk bones to a game. I've thrown a bone on the field. That's who invented it. Nowadays, they call it the dog pound, yet it's like the Wayne's World TV basement.

It's just corporate. It's like dog pound brought to you by... I don't play that. No. I just want to put that out there if anybody's... Yeah, I guess I haven't really checked in on the Vegas situation with the Raiders. Do they still have crazy-ass Spike guy and all that? I don't know.

I haven't really checked. Yeah, I don't know. You probably got to let that go. So pregame, it's Rock and roll hall of fame weekend they have uh the national anthem being played by ozzy osbourne lead guitarist zach wild hell yeah you know what did he have the black and white like uh mesmerized uh guitar bullseye guitar black and white bullseye less paul um you guys are more familiar with him than me. He had a big ass wild looking guitar for sure.

No. You know how to spell Zach Wild. It's got to have an E on the end of wild. It does. And a Y. And a Y. It's W-Y-L-D-E. You want to take a run at Zach?

Go ahead. Z-A-K-K. He just couldn't commit to the third K. No. It's implied. I guess so. It's implied. No.

It is because the first guitar I ever saw the guy play had a Confederate flag on it. Not surprised. I had many guitar magazine Zach Wild covers pinned to my wall once upon a time. He's in Pantera 2.0 now, right? I think so, yeah. I didn't send this to Rob. Does anything say heavy metal more than that? Ridiculous.

She's the wheeze. Got a Browns jersey, though. Yeah, here he is. Stan corrected. So then, apparently this is a thing they do every game, and from what I understand, they usually have an athlete do it. Play a solo?

No, no, no. Oh. After the National Anthem, they will usually have an athlete go, and they give them a guitar, and they go up and smash it on the guitar smashing stage, and it gets the crowd in a frenzy. Okay. I like these bits.

Arrowhead does something like this, and Atlanta has one. Ring a bell, or you do this or that. I like that. But it's usually somebody like a local sports guy, whatever. Right. So they're big and strong. This week they had strung out Flava Flav. Oh, no no well first of all i do believe he's a few years but we can describe the video so oh no he's uh unable to break the guitar

so i videoed this this is in my suite i'm taking a video of my all the fans are just waiting. What is he on? Hit number 12 there? Yeah, no, it's... Not even denting it. He's so tired now. It's not even just that he didn't break it.

It's all still intact. It's showing no damage. I'm saying, not even a dent. There we go, there we go. The neck just snapped. See, the neck snapped. But he never broke guitar proper. That is

Everything we're about to discuss is very Cleveland So Cleveland Give the guy you know in Hollywood The prop Yeah you can't break a chair over someone's head You would actually just kill them You need a breakaway guitar The chair is

Yeah it's made of balsa wood or whatever Same with a bottle Don't hit your buddy over the head with a bottle thinking it's going to shatter like in Hollywood. They'll die. Yeah, you will just knock them out. The bottle will not break, likely. And if it does, it'll just put a big, you know, right into their neck. Did anybody tell you how exactly they arrived upon Flava Flav?

I think he was there. Was he being inducted for? Okay, maybe. I don't know. I feel like they have to be in by now. Yeah, I think they actually are. The halftime show was, who was it? Oh, my gosh, now I can't remember.

Oh, Foreigner. Nice. My God. Yeah, and? I had a bunch of people in my suite that were fired up about Foreigner. I bet you did. I was like, Jesus, really? They got a couple bangers. Oh suite that were fired up about Foreigner. I bet you did. I was like, pieces, really? They got a couple bangers.

I got to go watch Foreigner. You got to go watch Foreigner. Hot-blooded. Yeah, that's about all they did. They did Hot-Blooded, and then they did another version of Hot-Blooded. Yeah, you guys just named the whole medley that they did. I don't know. I think I've met a foreigner a little bit.

I've seen a foreigner in concert. And I don't know. Are they from Cleveland? Because I've just kind of always assumed that they were from somewhere like Cleveland. See, I don't think so. But again, it's Hall of Fame induction weekend. But if you were there, it might have under their name 2018 inductee. It didn't mean that they were being inducted this weekend.

It just meant they were somehow tangentially related to rock and yeah like slave of slave rock hall yeah they've expanded it yeah foreigner new york city is what i'm saying ah that's right where nothing is given. Player intros. I was very interested in how everything would be received. Number one, because they were introducing the offense. And I thought, oh, this is wild because this is before the game. All the talk leading up to it. So I had been here a few days already. I've been hanging around with a lot of people.

And the number one topic was Deshaun Watson. How could it not be? And how effed we are and how, you know, I was against it from the beginning and all that, you know, everybody has their own story of why they hate Deshaun Watson. I was trying to find anyone. Like, I was thinking this, of all, think of all sports, any local team's athlete, could there be a more hated guy? Or girl?

I'll put you out there. No, it would be really tough. It would have to be because even though sex addiction is a thing, it's even shakier and definitely more stigmatized in substance. So it's not even really like he said, hey, I have a problem. Like, if you kill someone in a drunk driving accident and you're an alcoholic, then people eventually probably are going to say, hey, this guy had a problem, you know, and he's going to do his time. But you can't really do that for what he did. Well, the main thing is he sucked. I was going to say, then you make matters worse by being really, really terrible.

That is the main thing. And of course it's that you had to, you had to trade everything and pay everything. So it's not like even the Panthers who traded everything, but then they got a guy that didn't have to pay him any, you know, they're if Bryce Young sucks, you know, you'll move on and you'll get another one in three years. And really, that didn't affect the bottom line and it didn't affect the rest of your team. But this affects the rest of your team. It's not just the worst trade in the history of the NFL. Let's give it a little time.

But I think it's going to go down as the worst trade in the history of pro sports. Because Russell Wilson had something to say about that. That was a pretty bad trade Denver had to make. They overpaid right away. That was a bad bid as well. But they were able to just kind of release him, and they still have a viable football team. Yes.

And it didn't come with all the baggage of, we're going to make you watch this guy that has no contrition at all for all these, the whole thing. It's got every single part of it. The only thing missing is something related to an underage person. That's about the only way the Deshaun Watson story could possibly be worse. Are fans more upset with Deshaun the man or the organization and ownership because it's not like there weren't red flags all over the place on all fronts

to begin with? Yeah, but his daughter said it was cool. No, it's compounded by. The fact that he sucks? People kind of liked Baker. Yep. And Baker brought them to the playoffs for only the second time since they've been back. And then he won the only playoff game in Brown's

history since 1999 when they came back. That's their only playoff win. The next year, he did get hurt. He did fight through it and play all year. And he wasn't as good. And that was the year that they started publicly exploring trade options for Deshaun Watson. And then Deshaun Watson took them off the list. Well, by that time, now you had pissed off Baker and you had thought, well, we can't go with Baker. So we have to just throw everything at Deshaun Watson to get him here. Give up Baker for nothing, basically. baker so we have to just you know throw everything at deshaun watson to get him here give up baker

for nothing basically and now you're watching baker dominate or at least play very very well elsewhere and you could have baker mayfield you could have joe flacco who was here last year and he's still a viable and they couldn't keep joe flacco. So most people are mad at the ownership if they really look into it a little bit because they gave, before this season started, in the offseason, after what had been going on last year, they gave Andrew Barry, their GM, and head coach Kevin Stefanski extensions. Ooh, I did not know that. extensions. Ooh, I did not know that. So if Andrew Barry was the one who said, Hey, uh, Jimmy Haslam, I'm willing to put my job on the line for this. We got to make this trade. We got to pay him all the money. I truly believe in this. If he was the one who said that this past off season, he would have been fired. But if Jimmy Haslam was the one that said, look, offseason, he would have been fired. But if Jimmy Haslam was the one that said, look, do this. I got to have this.

Look, I'm the owner. A couple times I'm going to make the call. This time I'm making the call. Then he would say, man, I feel bad that I've put the whole team in this. I'm going to have to, I will give you an extension. And Kevin Stefanski, since you're the good soldier who every week goes up to that podium saying, you know what? He's our quarterback. I know he might be 520th out of 530 quarterbacks eligible for this terrible stat since the year 2000. But he's really the best chance we have to win.

That's why they had to get rid of Flacco because they couldn't have that just the controversy of him just sitting there. And that's why this week before the game, they actually demoted Jameis to third string because the screams were getting louder and louder for Jameis Winston to get in there. If Deshaun Watson is going to look this bad. Well, they just made him the third stringer. The excuse was, well, he had a bad week of practice okay yeah um how much practice how many reps are the second and third stringers getting against you know so they brought in uh what is it dorian thompson robinson yeah yeah so uh and then lo and behold of course he gets hurt you know that the Achilles happens, and then they actually have to go to DTR right before halftime. And briefly

Jameis, right? Yeah. Oh, later. So DTR gets injured on an interception, and they might have said, look, that's your interception finger that you hurt there. Now we're going to have Jameis come in, because they can only use Jameis if it's a second injury. They brought in Jameis and it was really funny because by that time I'm in the car and we're

driving home listening to the game. By the way, at a Browns game now, and you saw this, if you want to beat the traffic, you have to leave in the second quarter. We left in the third quarter and it was like a mob. It was like half the stadium was leaving when we left.

Yeah, that was a part of when you got back, and you were like, I didn't think you left games early. You left pretty early. And I'm like, man, we looked around seven minutes ago in the half, and it was half full. And I'm like, well, we need to go now. That game was just – I didn't watch much of it, but obviously saw all the things of the storylines.

But also, if your game opens with getting a kickoff returned by a white for a touchdown against you, you're completely screwed. Dude, you knew the day was really bad. Yes, some white guy. That's my notes. I have my notes right here. Some white guy returns opening kickoff 100 yards. You cannot give up a return touchdown. Some white guy returns opening kickoff 100 yards.

You cannot give up a return touchdown to a white on the opening kick and expect good things after that. It's just Browns. It was all just very, very Browns. And then also, yeah. I was just going to say. I was just going to say. The booing. Hold on.

So driving home, I just wanted to just wrap that up. Yeah. The radio announcers. Did you know Andrew Siciliano is their main play-by-play guy now on radio did not he's from cleveland the guy with the big ears oh yeah from the nfl network yep um he's from cleveland and i guess jim donovan their longtime play-by-play guy uh got cancer or something, and so he's out, and then Siciliano has taken over. But he and his color guy were just kind of like, whoa, it's really something to see someone back there with confidence just step into a throat.

They were ripping second-level whatever, subtweeting Deshaun Watson and DTR, I guess, as like they were talking about Jameis as if Tom Brady just came in in his prime. They just couldn't believe how great it was to see Jameis on the field of play. That's interesting. I mean, we've seen from home recall how different it is across the league, right? I mean, the one that obviously jumps to mind is the Patriots crew. Very entitled.

Outwardly hated Cam Newton. Whereas, you know, Brad and Babe would, you know, Zeke for a three-yard run, and they're like, oh, I thought he was washed up. Here he is walking the dog. It's just very, very different, but that's funny. The Browns get that latitude. So did you boo? We need to find some Brad and Babe stuff from game one.

Oh. And compare it to the Lions game. That's not a bad idea. Anyway, so yes, player announcements. They do the offense. Deshaun gets roundly. It was amazing. That's so weird.

Like really loud A-Rod back in Seattle type boos. During player announcements. At home for his team. Before the game started. It's not like it's a- They're one and five. It's not Stefan Diggs going back to Buffalo or something, you know? No, no, no.

It's not a guy going back. It's his team. It's a guy who currently plays there and who is signed up for the next five years and so locked in that they can't release him. Although, there's ways.

They should just release him. But anyway, they've got the best thing that could have happened to them, in my opinion, right now. But they didn't end with Watson. The booze, and then they end with watson the booze and then they end with nick chubb of course they know how to stack the place went nuts yeah the place

went nuts that and you know they did get down near the goal line and the whole place is chanting chubb it was awesome um as awesome as you could get for a one in five of an atmosphere you can get. So then the injury. And then in the beginning of the game, though, before they get to the injury even. He was pretty awesome. Huh? Jameis was kind of, or excuse me, I keep saying Jameis, but Deshaun was actually not bad. He was not pretty awesome.

Go take a look at the numbers. Oh, yeah. In fact, every play that would happen happen the uh tv at least that that i was looking at um in the suite you know i'd sit outside for a little bit but then there's a couch and it's air conditioned what if i well why would i not sit in that suite you know i don't want to waste uh waste money by having that couch in there and having not nobody sit on it um they kept showing on the screen they would show the completion that he had like four yards down the field and then they would show a guy like the the wide open guy that was 15 yards down like every single play it was one of those and if he threw 20 yards down the field into

double coverage they would show the underneath route that was 12 yards down the field this guy running wide like every play he made the wrong uh move ever did you uh did you guys talk about that article yet no i was waiting on you that bill barnwell article no i've read it and i saw but bill barnwell article uh highlighted some of the problems with deshaun watson are not just uh his completion percentage which is terrible and his decision making which is terrible all that but it-making, which is terrible, all that. But it's the sacks that he takes. And he took a couple of sacks just like that.

When you could have got rid of the ball, you could have sidestepped, you could have got away. He's just like, it's almost like he didn't care at all. Like, well, I'll just take the sack here. I will still be paid $3 million for this game only. Whatever it is. it's insane um okay now we get to the uh we get to the uh injury and it's exactly to me it was as mild of a happy response by the crowd as it could have been after the whole game they're booing the guy the game player intros started booing him all the talk leading up to it is we

we can't believe we still have to look at this guy why aren't they benching this guy so it was all about how bad he is and then he finally gets injured and there was actually some polite applause on him leaving the field and like hey and we're gonna act like we're we're just really classy here but so predictable that every you know player oh in fact i heard one of the uh so tony grossi is a sports writer longtime writer in Cleveland. You may have heard of him. Was on a sports station. I was listening to that on the way to the game. And he was talking about how of all, and he's there like every, you know,

he's like their David Moore. So he's at everything, every press conference, he's in the locker room at every media availability. He's at a training camp. Every day that you can be there, he's there. He said, as this year goes, he has never seen Deshaun Watson talking to another player in the locker room. I believe that. Like he just lives in his own little bubble there.

He never interacts with anybody. He is not friendly with the play. There's nobody that's got his back type thing. On the sideline, same thing if you ever watch a game. Nobody's going up after an interception or a tough drive or something and hitting him on the shoulder saying, hey man, keep your head up. Let's go. He's not walking up and down talking to wide receivers or pumping up the linemen. He's sitting by himself.

Okay, so heading into this game, he was already public enemy number one. Hated seemingly by his team and by the fans. So then he gets injured, and it's clear that he's being carted off, and he won't be coming back this year. I thought the stadium could have started the wave right then. Like they could have, they could have hit celebration on the scoreboard or the fireworks or whatever they do after a big thing. And they didn't yet.

The players, if you would listen to Jamis and his post game and listen to some of the other guys have to do the bit of, Oh, it's just disgusting. It's just sickens me that the crowd would cheer and all look i was in philly the day that michael irvin's career ended and and they were cheering that he uh got his neck injured and was carted off uh that's what fans do and it's always just it's never 100 of the fans you know so

i don't know i didn't think it was an egregious reaction at all yeah but but the players do everybody was thinking this is great this is great because now they just and i bet stefanski's thinking now i can just play another quarterback because that's what i've wanted to do hell jimmy haslam is like, this is great because I might be able to recoup some of the salary just on insurance money. It'll still count against the cap, but at least it won't be out of my pocket. So I think everybody,

and hell, maybe Deshaun Watson is happy too. I was going to say that. I bet he is. I don't have to go back and... I think that's the last snap he'll ever take in the NFL. I said that to Danny before we started today. I don't think it... I think that's it.

Why would he come... Why is he going to work really hard to rehab? To come back and be hated? He gets the money either way. Yeah. Well, hell, wherever he lands. What do you mean? Well, I mean, if he were somehow to work it out where, I don't know,

he retired and then became somehow later a free agent, I don't know how the money works in that, but if he ever ended up on another team, what market is going to just open arms, embrace, and be excited about him being their quarterback? He's probably done. You're right. I agree with you.

I think that's it. And who would sign him as their starter? 100%. And where would he go where he wasn't going to be a starter? Yeah, and... The only deal he could get is like a Russell Wilson just signed for like one year, one million dollars with the Steelers because he's still getting paid

by Denver. Yeah, but he also wasn't coming off an Achilles. It would be hard to get another starting job in another city if you tore your Achilles and were fully locked in. But he's Deshaun Watson. I don't know, man. It's a fascinating story because I'm – of course it's the –

the Cowboys and the Browns are probably the top two teams, and when things happen to them, you're like, yeah, well, that's the Cowboys or that's the Browns. It just seems like everything that ends up being a crazy story about either one of those organizations, it makes total sense. Of course that happened to the Browns. How about these big games I go to in Cleveland? We were talking about it, man.

Mason Rudolph. I was there for Mason Rudolph helmet getting hit with his own helmet or was that Miles yeah Miles Garrett ripped his helmet off right and swung it at him yeah got suspended for the rest of the year

they're not I doubt they go to Jameis either which is going to suck because I like having Jameis play every week I don't know well you know they can easily say he had a good week of practice

yeah but they don't really want to win. Well, I wonder. That's another good point. I was reading. Now that they're 1-6, do they have their own draft pick next year finally? They do. Okay. I was reading this earlier, and I was curious, Dan, if you, in some of the chatter around native Cleveland fans up there,

chatter around you know native cleveland fans up there there was word that possibly they were considering trading jamis by making him the emergency quarterback that day but now it seems like you really can't do that because at least if you're not going to start him you need a backup right did you hear any of that that the reason that they demoted him down to practice, or not practice, but emergency QB yesterday was because there was talk about them potentially trying to trade him? There is an article here on a Cleveland website. Yeah, it says they were looking at him. What I heard was, this is just chatter, that it was because the cries to have him be put in the game, they didn't even want that to be an option.

So Stefanski had to demote him the third string because you wouldn't be yelling to put DTR in. Because now you're faced with the option of starting him and then, hey, you might win two or three, maybe four games this season, or back him up to the guy with two last names, and then you can just tank a thon, baby. So I was telling these guys, go ahead, Dan.

Here's the big concern, Browns fan concern, because like you said, the Cowboys are going to Cowboys, and the Browns are going to Browns. And now the Cowboys Cowboys-ing is better because you can get to the playoffs, and then you look like a fool. The Browns could never get just going at all. Their concern is that they're going to get the number one pick

and draft Shadur Sanders. Okay, that's what I was about to say to you. I brought it up to these guys before we started. I'm like, man, for Dan, for all of it, I need the Browns to end up in a position to draft Shadur Sanders. But if you recall, Prime has already made his opinions about this known when he was asked about it. I'm like, hey, this is a new day. He was asked about Travis Hunter and he was asked about Shadur and he's like, they're not just going to go anywhere. We're not interested in that.

So they could end up in a position to draft him and just be told, no, I'm not going to Cleveland. It's just not happening. So then they have to take Quinn. I'll tell you, man. You think Quinn Ure's body is big enough? He's a big dude, man.

Is he? Well, I mean, he's 6'2", 200. Okay. I don't know. I guess, he's 6'2", 200. Okay, I don't know. I guess standing around all those linemen. He just didn't look. Well, I'm not saying I think the guy's going to be great. Obviously, yesterday or Saturday you weren't thinking. Yeah, I'm just saying right now he's going to be one of the top three quarterbacks taken in the draft.

I watched every snap Saturday that I could when we were switching over from the Indians game. I'll call them the Indians. It's all right. Those upstart Yankees. Well, at least we could still count on our plucky underdogs from the National League. That was the funny thing about the Mets. Oh, what a miracle season.

The third highest payroll in baseball or something? It's like, no, the highest. They're like at 300 million. I just knew the top three were those three teams and then the old Guardiac kids at 25. Yeah. That would be hilarious if they ruined Shadur Sanders. That would be awesome.

It would be even more awesome if it meant that Deion became the coach, which I don't think is crazy. That'd be great. I want it. Yeah, you know I want it all. Dan would legitimately soil himself. Mm-hmm. Like, they could make Tiger life coach or something

and make Mike Tyson strength and conditioning and bring back Bill Belichick as defensive coordinator. Michael Irvin, receiver's coach. Michael, yeah. This is perfect. I want life coaching advice from Tiger Woods. Yeah, well, he's been through a lot. You know, that's usually how it works.

Okay, are we going to stick around? If you'll have me. Aw. I mean, I have to make my bed. That's about all I got to do. All right, what's next, Blake? Well, the news is brought to you today by Elite Rides DFW. Ooh, our good friends at Elite Rides DFW.

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Or EliteRides-DFW.com. Here's Jay with the Dumb Zone News. All right. Well, it was a big weekend for news, and a lot of that's going to come to us from the world of the politic. But we're going to start with a couple of other local-ish stories here. The 2024 State Fair of Texas has officially come to a close. 2.4 million folks attended the State Fair.

That is a record. And one out of four of those ate a corn dog. On average, yes, that's correct. But when I go to the State Fair, I'm eating for, I guess, what would be, you know, I eat three. I'm a three corn dog guy. Three? Yeah. Per visit?

All at the same time? Yeah, I just slam three huge corn dogs in my mouth. You look like that guy in the Guinness book with like 300 cigarettes in his mouth. We used to call that the harmonica. Yeah, the cigarette harmonica. He would get like a dozen cigarettes and just smoke down the line. cigarettes in his mouth we used to call that the harmonica yeah the cigarette harmonica just smoke down the line he was or something yeah yeah i did the one at disneyland recently um and it it freaked me out a little bit but we made sure to get into one of the ones they were

every other and uh every other one of them didn't rock and my daughter was not sure to get into one of the ones they were every other and uh every other one of them didn't rock and my daughter was not about to get in one of the ones that rocked and i was like yeah are you sure babe i'd totally do that and yeah and you're thinking yeah i don't want yeah it's too scary up there yeah it's real high it is very high i. I'm less scared by that than I am big roller coaster, though. Or fair roller coaster, for that matter. You know? Somebody with chlamydia and crank in their systems. Well, I don't like anything that has just been erected.

Except for my wiener. I love that. But, you know, if you just have to build the roller coaster bad bit, I'm not going to get on. Here's a funny figure, Jake and Dan, Blake. 400,000 prizes were won at the Midway, totaling an estimated value of $1.4 million. Yeah. So, you know. Average prize.

Street math says that's about a $3 prize. Yeah. You're spending God knows how much profit they make off of those things. Well, a big part, yeah. It's a roughly $3 prize that they had made by the Uyghurs in a sweatshop of an isolated area of China in a prison camp for one cent. Think about the little kid that wins some stuffy at the fair and goes home and sleeps with it in their bed that night. Number one, it's the most cheaply made piece of crap. And God knows what harmful chemicals are just embedded into the outer covering of that

that's how they got covered over here it was handed to you by chlamydia man yep so there's probably traces of vd and crack in the fur yep and it's been sitting out at the state fair for a month i saw an uh an ad for a politician that that's actually they're putting fentanyl in the price statement. Okay. That's what they meant by rainbow colored. Yeah. Dude, political ads up here are out of control. Be swing state, brother. Not just up there. Well, up there

it's a bigger deal. Here, we know who's winning everything here. Yeah, but every commercial during Texas-Georgia was that. They're ramping up, baby. What, a couple weeks away. I'm going to vote today, Dan. And it's all about chicks with dicks.

Yeah, girl, I'm out here in these streets. Oh, thank you. Yeah, no, that's every Ted Cruz ad is that. He just doesn't have a whole lot else to hit you with. Like they don't have anything that's like of substance it seems right it's just all about and it's pictures dudes with makeup on it's really funny

did anybody catch the debate between him and all red I guess yeah I watched a little bit of it it's pretty funny yeah Ted Cruz he thinks he thinks January 6 this hilarious yeah he's just laughing hilarious the whole time yeah anytime colin oliver would bring up jan 6 he just over there just laughing it's untouchable so shout out to the state fair there was a big fight last night i saw on dallas texas tv so we could close things out that's solid last, you know, we got it up here now. It appears to be

people getting food. We just have two broads. I love when broads fight because of the hair grab. It's basically like a built-in hockey jersey. You know, like for the hockey jersey fight, you can just grab by it. And you're generally going to just let them fight it out, right?

Yeah, very, very seldom do you see the fight really broken up. Like, that guy's kind of there, but he's like, I'd really prefer if this keeps going on. They're usually pretty big, the ladies. Yeah, typically, yeah. Powerful base. I scour the internet for these. I do also love that there's always a stroller nearby.

Whose baby is this? Right. The best is when the hair gets so taken up a notch when the weave comes out the weave will come and they're holding it like it's a scalp yeah good times that girl that got her ass kicked unfortunately she was dressed to like look cute not fight she's a cardigan sweater right little. Slippers. Jimmy Eat World concert look. Yeah. That's not how she thought her night was going to end up.

Let's do one more here, a follow-up. We don't really have a- Congrats, Danny. Your fair traffic is over. Yeah. Yeah. It ended last night. I was in it, though, a little bit yesterday. Here, this actually started about 90 minutes ago.

Robert Robertson is testifying virtually before state lawmakers. This is the man that was set to be put to death last week. I respect that you're staying on top of this story. This is insane. This is called tracking, tracking the news. It's crazy. And every one of the stories, they try to get the angle of what you got. So usually what you'll get, you call SMU or you call UT or sometimes UNT or UTA.

They're like, I got to get an expert on this. This is political science professor, Jim, blah, blah, blah. In this one, everybody they talked to is like, we don't know. This has never happened before. They've never had this wrench thrown into things to try to stay in execution. By the way, that's on the list. Stay in execution? Yeah.

Well, he was set to be put to death. Last week. The parole board denied it, and they denied it not really on the merits of his case, but it was some sort of procedural thing. And there's a law in Texas, the Junk Science Law of 2013, that states that you should be awarded a retrial if you were convicted on evidence that is now viewed as arcane. We don't stick your hand in hot water to determine if you're a witch anymore. That's a real thing. You don't know about that?

I thought it made you pee. Oh. Yeah, I guess. If it makes you pee, then it's all, that's a real thing. You don't know about that. I thought it made you pee. Oh yeah. I guess like if it makes you pee, then you're a witch. That's right. Uh, but there's supposed to be looking at this science that was used to convict these people and say,

you got to get a new trial. Well, for whatever reason, they've never done it for someone who is going to be put to death. They've only used it for people who are getting life or like very long sentences. And so the only person from what I gather that can really stop this is Greg Abbott. And so what it sounds like is that all these lawmakers in Texas, these legislators, both Republican and Democrat, are throwing any Hail Mary they can to get as

much attention on this thing as possible so that Greg Abbott eventually will be like, hey, I'm going to take a look at this. I was going to try to do a Greg Abbott, but I don't really know what he sounds like other than just the most generic human being of all time. I think he's kind of whiny. I'm Greg Abbott. Is that right?

That's what I was saying. So he's got to testify like he's in court, but in front of all of the Texas house today. And then what happens? I don't know, because they just delayed it by 30 days. So he's still set to be hit with the cocktail in like 25 days. When he's done with his subpoena and his testimony, do they just walk him to the giant wooden chair with straps?

No, that doesn't exist anymore, and it was a 30-day stay. So he does have a few more weeks for something to happen. Yeah, what do you do? Is he close to the end of a book? Right. Yeah, that's tough, yeah. Should I start another one? You don't start a new one.

He had a PR in mind for bench or something. He's like, I'm pretty close. Maybe you should just read a leaflet. And not try to crack open infinite jest, Dan. That's a big book. All right, we had a very eventful weekend on the campaign trail and most of it comes from the donald trump side one because he's trump and two because i'm not really sure that kamala harris is doing anything but uh it was insane there's so much here

he worked at a mcdonald's because kamala uh has said that whenever she was the summer before or after her first year of college, she worked at a McDonald's. And they haven't really offered a ton of details about it, but she has a family member that says, yeah, I remember that, and a friend who says they remember it. But if you're trying to get employment records from 40 years ago, 40 years ago. The turnover that they have. It's probably going to be pretty difficult. But again, so this is like, we're going to focus on this though. Right.

It's just like the birth certificate. Not some policy or an issue that would help make your life better perhaps. Oh no. Let's focus on this. So Trump's bit was that while he was in Pennsylvania,

he would that he would go work at a McDonald's so that, quote, there's at least one member in the race who has. Okay. Meanwhile, North Korea is aligning with Russia to bring soldiers into Ukraine. But no, we need people proving that they're the ones that worked at McDonald's. Yeah, so he goes to the McDonald's. I love this country. Yeah, he goes to the McDonald's and he walks in.

Of course, we know he loves McDonald's. It's his favorite restaurant. So much so that he always has it on the plane. And when Clemson won the national title, he served them. Now, this was a bit unstable, but he served them McDonald's, but also Wendy's. And I want to say KFC. It was the Jim Miller I-30 fast food buffet. That's right.

Or he was a good dude, like Dan does for his family. He goes to multiple fast food buffet. That's right. That's right. Or, like, you know, he was a good dude, like Dan does for his family. He goes to multiple fast food restaurants. Like, I like the fries from this place, the shake from this place, and the chicken sandwich from this place. And it looked disgusting because the half-life of that stuff is, like, eat it right away. Yep. Doesn't travel well.

It was all fast food. It was every fast food place that there is. And the other suits. it is these guys these days, like my daughter was saying this to me, because she works for now Clemson football. They don't eat that. No. They are not eating this stuff anymore.

Like that used to be, you know, when Dirk was coming into the league. That's when 18-year-olds were still eating like this. 18-year-olds now have been training to get into the NFL and whatnot. And yeah, they're eating like LeBron meals. They're eating like Tom Brady now. They don't eat this stuff. They do not like, oh yes, fast food. Great.

This is what I love. No, they're not pounding fast food. They're eating protein shakes and salmon and that's what they were hoping to get. You go to the White House, I want some salmon, I want some prime rib. It's funny

too because they might eat, that's the best photo ever of Trump, him just looking at all his spread. They might eat. That's the best photo ever of Trump, him just looking at all his spread. They might eat it occasionally, Dan, but they definitely don't expect, like you said, that that's what they're going to get for winning the national championship. Right. They would be like if they said, yeah, let's wear our shorts and sweats.

No, they put on a suit. They want suit food. He's really in touch with what the kids are eating these days. Do you guys remember his tweet about it? No. It was, great being with the national champion Clemson Tigers

last night at the White House. Because of the shutdown, I served the massive amounts of fast food I paid. Over 1,000 hamburgers. Hamburgers? Within one hour. All gone. Great guys and big eaters.

Hamburgers. I am interested in the Twitter influence. What do you mean? Are you on the election? Because the Republicans now would look back and say oh man you know they're so liberal before and they weren't allowing us to say this

and that that was uh you know they were they influenced the election yeah by you know donald trump when he was saying stuff about january 6th and they're like yeah that's not right we're uh we're kicking you off here. They're like, oh, that influenced things. Although that was well after the election. Yeah, birders. Yeah, you're saying now... Now, I'm just saying

whenever I click on a video, if I click on the video to watch Jameis complain about the Cleveland fans, like, immediately after a Republican ad comes up. Yes, without a doubt. Like, immediately after a Republican ad comes up. Yes, without a doubt. Like, it just happened automatically. No matter what video I click on or whatever,

the next thing is like an ad or an Elon thing or something. So this is clearly... I mean, the other thing was kind of like a could you argue they were trying to influence it? Maybe, but, you know. Like, this is like overtly, hey, the owners of this are all just pushing you in this one way.

Yeah. So it will be interesting to see if that, you know, has any effect or not. Well, it's going to be interesting to see how much of an effect it has. It definitely has an effect. Yeah. It just might not be enough to sway an election one way or the other. But hell, I mean, I haven't read that much about it, but I'm pretty sure Elon's out here committing felonies

by offering people money to sign a petition to say they're going to vote a certain way. Hell, I don't know. Yeah, there's like a sweepstakes that if you vote a certain way, then you could win a million dollars. If you're in a swing state. I've always thought that was... I thought it's funny that Trump... Yeah, I'm in a swing state.

You are. I thought it's funny that Trump I thought it's funny that Trump qualified like it's a big deal that he paid when every one of those restaurants has a 99 cent menu yeah it's like oh awesome dude aren't you a billionaire

so he was at McDonald's over the weekend while he was in Pennsylvania and what's weird is like he's this hardcore McDonald's fan, but also a hardcore clean freak. He's an ultra, ultra clean freak guy. Oh, is he? Okay. Oh my gosh, dude.

Yeah. Dude, the guy's a giant pussy. You know what I mean? He's never done any sort of work. You know what I mean? He's a kid from Manhattan, or grew up in Manhattan anyways, whose dad was a mogul.

It ain't like he's... His hands have never been dirty in his life. So... Well, I'm relating to a lot of what you're saying. Yeah, I know, but so are you. That's what I'm saying, yeah. But you also just eat salmon. You eat salmon and broccoli and apples and water. And you know what I'm saying, yeah. But you also just eat salmon. You eat salmon and broccoli and apples and water.

And you know what I mean? You're a healthy person. Even when you go to Taco Bell, I want the black bean. You eat healthily. Trump eats Big Macs and fries all the time. Does he really? He drinks 10 Diet Cokes a day. How is he 78 if that's really what he's lived off of?

And he's got the good drugs. Okay How is he 78 if that's really what he's lived off of? He's a specimen, baby. And he's got the good drugs. But, okay, so he's at McDonald's. I could not find the one quote I really wanted because he does this thing sometimes where he doesn't say the word the. And in this case, the news article read that he went in and said, I want to work fryer. Because he does that sometimes. He's like, you see trucks?

Big truck. You know what I mean? He just leaves out, you see these trucks. He'll say, I saw a truck. And he walked in and was like, where is it? I want to work fryer. So he was working the fryer. And then they show him.

He's got his apron on. He's all spilling out of it because those things are hard to hide under. And they're trying to fill the fries up, and he's scooping them, and the guy's kind of talking him through it, and I thought this was funny. Well, this is a great job to take at the beginning. That part's funny too because he's like, but if you stick with it too long, you're a loser. Well, this is a great job to take at the beginning,

and it requires expertise expertise i'm going through the french fry stuff it's a whole it's a whole big process and it requires great expertise actually to do it right and to do it and to do it fast yeah well i do appreciate maybe a little bit more. Yeah. You take it for granted. You say, give me French fries. I'll never forget this experience. Okay. Now I know how to do it.

And it's very good. But you know what? It's beautiful. It's clean. It's really nice. You never touch them. I always figured somebody stuffs them in with their hand and I don't like that. And they don't do it that way.

You never touch them. It's really great. So I want to thank you all for coming out. Yeah, okay. Wow. Don't even touch him. He's never worked a day in his life. Oh, my God.

It's such a great stunt. It's so funny. How could you not laugh at this, no matter who you want to vote for? It's great. Okay, so while he was in La Trobe, which apparently is the birthplace of one Arnold Palmer, the golfer, the legend, Rolling Rock, there you go. La Trobe Brewery.

Trump, as we know, as he's just talking about what big guys the Clemson team is. There was a governor from West Virginia named Jim. I think his last name also started with a J, but it's failing me now. The guy was massive. He was like 6'6", 320. I would always wait for Trump to go to

West Virginia because Trump was obsessed with this guy. He's like, look at him. Look at Big Jim. He's a big man. He's's like, look at him. Look at Big Jim. He's a big man. He's so big. Look at him. Look at Big Jim. Jim Justice.

Jim Justice. Look at the guy. He's a massive galoot. And Trump just sees big guys and he's like, that's awesome. It's awesome that you're huge. He's obsessed with masculinity, right? Yeah. So here's his Arnold Palmer palmer exactly mccarthy

but arnold palmer was all man and i say that in all due respect to women and i love women all right what already what does that mean you can be all man and not be disrespecting women it's a weird thing to say but also i love women love women. The way he says it. But Arnold Palmer was all man. And I say that in all due respect to women, and I love women. But this guy... This guy... They applaud that.

This is a guy that was all man. This man was strong and tough. And I refuse to say it, but when he took showers with the other pros, they came out of there, they said, oh, my God. That's unbelievable. I had to say it.

I had to say it. We have women that are highly sophisticated here. What? I don't even know. He had a big wiener. Yeah, he was. What are you saying? He was slaying. He wasn't going to, but he ended up having.

I refuse to say it, but Arnold Palmer had a huge cock. Highly sophisticated women. Yeah. They don't like a big, throbbing golf dick. It's so ridiculous. But I would say that for me, that was not the highlight of the Trump campaign trail this weekend. Because the founder and owner of hashtag C-T-E-S-P-N, sixth round draft pick Antonio

Brown has jumped on the Trump train along with his former teammate who wrecked Blake's fantasy football season Le'Veon Bell Le'Veon Bell posted a photo of himself wearing a t-shirt that said Trump or the Tramp over the weekend which is

much more like something you would see on a huge sign in my neighborhood than I would expect an NFL player to be wearing. But in any case, because the Trump team, really the Republicans have suffered from this for a long time, although it hasn't really hurt them that much. But there's not that many cool people, famous cool people, who want to be Republicans. It's like, oh, you got Kevin Sorbo.

You know what I mean? Chachi. Yeah, and Scott Baio. Kid Rock. Kid Rock. It's like, what if we have like George Clooney and Bruce Springsteen on the other side? Like, they don't have a ton of them coming out for them.

Right. So when they do, they got to capitalize. They just accept whoever. They have to. Right? Yeah, like, okay. Especially. Because have to. Right? Yeah. Especially. Because they would never like Antonio Brown. No.

But the thing is. They would have hated him. He's not just cool to some people. He's black. And this is a joke we make with one of my buddies all the time. With KJ. We're like, dude, there's a lane for you. Like, if you just want to play this grift, you know, you're a well put together guy.

You're very successful professionally. There's a spot for you if you wanted a Fox News lane. So I don't know that Antonio Brown's going to get that. But once he started tweeting about how much he loved Trump, I'm sure someone from their campaign and comms reached out to him. And somehow they had this guy who is barely a functioning human being anymore. His brain is so gone. He's got the six babies by five women. I'm pretty sure Vontaze Berfic broke his brain 10 years ago.

He just rambles and says sometimes hilarious but really weird stuff on Twitter. They had him speak. So here he is speaking at a Trump rally I got a few cuts here he's uh working in some of the uh the Trump nicknames and if you guys remember his catchphrase it was businesses like you don't remember no business is booming that's what he would always hashtag all of his highlights highlights with he'd be like with AB businesses booming but before i get too deep in my speech i want to say i know the media is going to call me crazy me and trump crazy for having me speaking here but i want to make this clear we are not they are okay that was our first please clap and followed by

really weird laugh. There's a lot of please claps in here. They are. You're not supposed to clap. You know, Kamala Harris and Tim Watts, do you really know they want to put tampons in the boys' bathroom? Is that crazy? That's really insane, right? And by the way, Tempon Tim Watts,

he isn't a real football coach. He could never guard me. Guys, how is business? Business will be booming going against Tim Watts. Temp on Tim Watts. It'll be really booming going against him. Now back to the rest of my speech. Yeah, before we do that, let's just take a minute here.

Is that a good point? If your coach can't guard you? Yeah. Were any of them good points? That's like the most cringe stand-up bit it's very hard to listen to i mean he does he sounds mentally disabled right now is he reading uh i don't know that that's still something that he's capable of doing he's trying yeah it does sound very much like the floyd mayweather stars and stripes promo for the Breakfast Club. And did you know it?

Tampon Tim wants to put tampon in boys' bathroom. Can you believe it? Here's a very awkward police clap. I came to Pittsburgh as a six-round draft pick, an underdog, but the people in the city really embraced me.

They knew what it was like to be an underdog. My time here taught me to embody the spirit of Pittsburgh, a blue-collar, hard-working with people that are resilient and face challenges head-on. How bad is that? That is a very long hang time. More weird laugh here. And speaking of pushing forward in a better future,

we are here to support our 45th president, soon to be the 47th president, Donald J. Trump. Why is that funny? All right, this is 30 seconds of the most... It is kind of sad. But this is 30 seconds of the most. It is kind of sad. Yeah. But this is 30 seconds of one of the most confusing diatribes I've ever heard.

I guess, you know, like Trump sells coins and stuff. Uh-huh. MAGA coins. Maybe there's like an actual crypto. I have no clue what's going on, but I don't think Antonio does either. With Donald Trump, we would scribe as a nation. What? Scribe?

Wait, wait, wait. We're all going to turn into writers? We will what? Yeah, it's kind of a Jameis. Scribe? It's kind of a Jameis. If I'm strong, he's strong. Or if you're strong, I'm strong.

With Donald Trump, we would scribe as a nation. He's going for scribe. Oh, okay. With Donald Trump, we would scribe as a nation. A MAGA movie. You guys ever seen a MAGA movie? You guys ever seen a MAGA movie? Who's this hype man? I think he has one guy there who kind of was somewhat of his handler or set this up,

who knows when to respond in the way that Antonio Brown is like, that's when a black guy would respond to me. Yeah. But the rest of the crowd is like, what the hell is going on? I have. Yes, sir. You guys ever seen a MAGA movie? Well, today is a MAGA movie theater.

And shout out to the MAGA coin and the greatest president coin going, a MAGA coin. Is there another one? Have you guys ever seen a MAGA movie? Make some noise if you've seen a MAGA coin. Is there another one? Have you guys ever seen a MAGA movie? Make some noise. If you've seen the MAGA movie, what is happening? I told you, I told you,

dude, it sounds like they just got a special needs person up there and handed him a couple of index cards. We're like, just to say some of this, it won't matter. Have you guys ever seen a mega movie mega coin mega movie theater it's it's one of the uh let's let's put some odds on uh the next guy to join the party uh

join the party uh john watson nah i doubt it i was the next yeah celebrity out of nowhere that you wonder oh like because it can kind of get him some play i i don't know what that means yeah i know you can go to the mailbox and get your play money i i you know we already have like your uh your max crosby and gardner Minshew, but those were easy plays. Those guys... You see that from a mile away. Just the next person to emerge and be at a rally. Like, oh, look. They got a guy that brandished a weapon at the

St. Louis Parade or whatever. All of a sudden, he's at the rally. Yeah, here's the last one. I was blessed to be surrounded by these values, including's at the rally. Yeah, here's the last one. I was blessed to be surrounded by these values, including grit, loyalty, hard work, and I took these with me every time I laced them up and stepped on the field. The same one. But I'm here today repping a man, representing a man who carries those same values, Donald Trump.

Just had no idea. Just no idea when to clap well when you hear Donald Trump that's a good key yeah there's your news for today Blake I feel sad

why just listening to him yeah you want to talk about Sheen Sheen Sean sure Wealth Management 360 let's do it oh yeah man You want to talk about Sheen? Sheen? Sean? Sure.

Wealth Management 360? Let's do it. Oh, yeah, man. He can be your money expert. In fact, I think he's Dan's. I met with him. Yeah, me and the wife met with him. Now, is it because...

Looked over some stuff. He's great. Is it because he's good at wealth management or is it because he's not super old and will die tomorrow? I believe all of those things are part of the equation. You should check out his website, Blake. It is

dallasfinancialplanner.net Yeah. No, he'll answer questions. He's just the kind of guy that'll look at what you've got. He'll come to you if you need him to. You can go out to his place. Just take of look at what you got and uh he'll come to you if you need him to you can go out to his place um but just kind of taking a look at what you got and trying to uh set you up for the future as far as putting it in the right place you know make your money make

money for you for the future i don't know is that what he does yeah what he does is he does that so you don't have to because you don't know anything. Yeah, he's been a certified financial planner for 18 years. Oh, CFP. Kind of identifies with us as a small business owner as well. He worked for the man for a long time, but then now has branched off and is doing his own thing. But yeah, kind of figure out how much money you have to have saved before you retire. He will give you advice on that. He just can kind of help you in all kinds of areas.

So you should check out that website, which is? DallasFinancialPlanner.net. There you go. And he's a good dude. He's a good dude. We like to work with good dudes. All right. Go to the website.

Check it out. Look at all the cool pictures. The Dumb Zone presents Today in History. Now who's doing this when I'm gone? Laker. Danny, do you have it? Blake, you've been doing it. Do you want me to do it?

I got you. He just does this every day. Blake is pulling out some comedy there. He acts like I'm supposed to do it and I forgot, but then he goes, I got it, dude. Don't worry. Let me see what I can rattle off. Hey, off the top of my head, what do I have? Don't fix what ain't broke, Blake.

You know what I mean? Now who's prepping it when I'm gone? Was that the whole setup? Of course it was. No, but I just thought of it. If you want to sit here and bask in all the credit. Dan has to let everybody know that unlike anyone else, he still gets some work done when he's gone.

Yeah. He didn't have time to make his bed because he was prepping this segment for you to take all the credit for, Blake. I had 30 days without you giving me extra stuff, so I don't want to hear it. All right. Dan wrote, today is Monday, October 21st, the 295th day of the year. 71 days left in the year. Dan wrote on this date.

I only highlighted part of it, though. You read the whole thing, then. Dan wrote... You know, I highlight the good ones, but do you read every single thing I put on there? Dan wrote, in 2137, comma, b.c.com, the first recorded total eclipse of the sun occurred in China period.

Why'd you put all that extra stuff in there, Dan? What is happening? Oh, wow. We have an eclipse graphic. Who made that? The first ever eclipse. Recorded eclipse. And Blake left. Blake doesn't like eclipse-eye.

Even in China, they were like, eh. Yeah. We've got better stuff to do. In China in 2137 BC. They in China, they were like, eh. Yeah. We got better stuff to do. In China in 2137 BC. They were fired up. I don't know. In 1879, Thomas Edison perfected a workable electric light in his lab. Does that mean it was invented by someone else?

That does seem to be sort of. Or invented it a year prior. Implying that. That does seem to be sort of Or invented it a year prior And also I would take issue with the term Perfected because that would mean they never Changed the light bulb again which they've done Thousands of times That's because they had to plan Obsolescence

Ah that's true He had a perfect one made back then In 1921 President Warren G. Harding delivered a speech in which he condemned lynchings in the strongest of terms commended primarily by white supremacists against black americans in the deep south so basically he's like hey enough yeah this has been such a thing 1921 don't make me come over there that the president had to come out and be like, look. Cut it out.

Stop this, man. Please stop. Look, just kill him. And they're like, oh, okay. And it's funny. Yeah, it's funny that he's not. All right, this whole. He's like, look, we can just keep him down.

Keep him down economically. We won't give him loans. Hell, for all I care, you can still do the extrajudicial murdering part. Just don't hang him. The tree thing is just weird. Unnecessary attention to yourselves, guys. Come on. Be smart. Just call a cop.

They'll do it behind closed doors. Just don't do it yourself. There's no cell phone cameras. It's 1921. Here's your taxes. I kind of don't want to read the only one he highlighted, just to be spiteful, but I'll read it. In 2004, Emerson College student Victoria Snellgrove

died hours after being shot in the eye with a pepper spray pellet fired by police trying to control a raucous crowd outside Fenway Park where the Red Sox had just won the American League Championship. A yay boo. Made it to the World Series.

Made it. Then let's see. In 2021, Alec Baldwin was pointing a gun on a movie set in New Mexico when it went off and killed cinematographer something Hutchins.

And they weren't even celebrating a come from 3-0 down in the American League Championship Series and come back and win the World Series. Also wounded a director. Charges of involuntary manslaughter against Baldwin were dropped in July of this year. Man, I got down some Twitter wormhole one time about that case that basically had it connected back

to like the JFK assassination. Like Alec Baldwin is, I don't know, the Hollywood elites and everything. And I look up and it's like, the president's a lizard. I'm like, damn. Your internet is different than mine. Yeah. Yeah, for sure.

Yeah. Birthdays today, your war leader, Zach Greinke, is 41. Once dated a Cowboys cheerleader and is pound for pound one of the weirdest athletes of all time. 77.5 war. Is that like you've never thought of Zach Zach Granke as a Hall of Famer. Yes, I have. Really? Yeah.

That's what... Jake talks about it all the time. Are you guys on board with that? Are you willing to stand up for that, Blake? Zach Granke in the Hall of Fame? I'm with you. I probably don't think Hall of Famer, but that's a pretty good war right there.

The longest neck ever? Give us a call. Davis Mills is 26. The longest whatever? Neck. Look it up. Yeah, as opposed to Arnold Palmer. What about, is it Gannon?

What does he have? Not Gannon. Merton Hanks? Glennon. Glennon. Mike Glennon. Mike Glennon. You didon. Mike Glennon. You did used to say Glennon, didn't you? Very long name. Yeah.

Yeah. I used to say that Mike Glennon looked like Earthworm Jim. You guys remember Earthworm Jim? Oh, yeah. That's good. Thank you, Blake. Earthworm Jim. It was a cartoon.

No. Yeah. He was an earthworm. But see, I got this name because there's more uh jake joey harrington is 46 big miss on my part big miss on my part good news is i was not uh in an nfl gm like matt millen was i was about as qualified as he was. Ricky Rubio was 34. Damn. And I think that's younger than I thought.

He was so young when he got drafted, dude. And he didn't come over for a long time. That was a crazy draft, man. Willis McGahee was 43. Because, okay, so the Timberwolves had Three picks in the first round The first one was at number Six where they took Johnny Flynn out of

Syracuse at number seven went Stephen Curry Like they needed a point guard but Let's see they took Ty Lawson Another point guard at 18 And I want to, another point guard, at 18. And I want to say another point guard later.

Harden was three. Yeah. No, that's an interesting draft. Oh, you're saying after Rubio, though. Yeah, but I'm just saying in general, the Timberwolves were a team that drafted three point guards in that draft and didn't get Steph Curry or Ricky Rubio. It's just a fun fact.

Also, the Roddy B draft. No, I'm looking. Roddy B was drafted? Mm-hmm. I thought he's... First rounder. Really? Oh, yeah.

Danny Charlotte Caffey is 71. Familiar. Can't tell you. Sounds familiar. The what's that? The Go-Go's. Oh, okay. Jeremy Miller is 48.

This says Growing Pains. Jeremy. Oh, I remember this guy. Yeah. That show sucked. Jeremy. Glenn Powell is 36. Kane Brown is 31, Jake.

Charlotte. Kane Brown played Cowboys halftime show on Thanksgiving. And to show you how uncountry the country singers are now, once had to call 911 because he got lost on his own property. And it was getting dark, and he was like, I'm afraid. What did he have a big edible before? So he wasn't like N-word guy? No, that's Morgan Wallen.

And by the way, full bounce back. Like, more popular than ever. The most popular singer in country music is arguably him. Shockingly, finding out that he casually uses the N-word did not end his career. Not in that industry. No. And then I have five more birthdays that I think I have ranked in order.

Wait, wait. You have them or he had them? This is me. Okay. But I can give Dan credit if he wants it because the names were on the list. Yeah. But I think I'm going to build towards your favorite, Jake. Okay.

Beginning at the bottom, Amber Rose is 41. Kanye and Wiz Khalifa. Singer Doja Cat is 29. I know. You like Doja Cat, Jake? Is she on your pop playlist when you're lifting weights? Yeah. Yeah, she is.

Hope Hicks is 36. Oh, my God. Big fan. SMU grad, she is. Hope Hicks is 36. Oh, my God. Big fan. SMU grad, Trump aide. She's fantastic. She's got a bright future in politics. So to let you know, there's two above her, I think. Wow.

She was a model, too. No way. Wasn't she? No way. When Trump is trying to fill out his political dream team of all the yet brightest young minds, he's not getting a Garofalo lookalike or Rachel Maddow? No. They got hots over there on the right. Oh, yeah. 82 today.

Judge Judy. Oh, God. right oh yeah 82 today judge judy oh god just an absolute wagon that's her and she's worth like half a billion dollars she's so rich i've never seen her owns all of it until she was already old did you have you ever seen her as like an 80 year old in the dress that's very flattering to her bottom no i'm not it's insane yeah i thought bottom? No, I'm not. It's insane. Yeah? I thought she was 82 when she was on TV. She's still on. They watch, didn't you watch her in rehab every day? Quite often.

Yeah. Yeah. You see what comes up when I type in Judge Judy ass. Bro. Isn't she worth a lot? We just said that. Oh, you did? I'm sorry sorry She is worth like half a billion dollars She owns the whole thing Yeah it's her production company

Her idea All of it Dan type in Judge Judy ass And do an image search There's one in particular Oh I was doing net worth But okay I'll do it Come on whatever

Just you know highlight net worth And replace it with ass Images Is it the orange suit she's wearing there? Orange with the black one next to it. Yeah. Unbelievable. Yeah, I'm not a big ass man.

Boyd. Oh, wow. Okay. It's probably Photoshop, but I don't care. That's one of the things that America has. If I'm running, we're going to talk about this. Yeah, well. What, the fascination with the-

The make America great again. Let's just cut that down a little bit. Absolutely not. You know, my era- I'm going to donate to a political campaign to keep you from getting into office. I'm going to give a million dollars. Back in my day, we had anorexia and bulimia, and we liked it. Yeah, me and Dan come.

Because we didn't want the fat asses. And now it's like, oh, eat all you want. Be proud of your body. It's because, Dan, you guys are discounting squats. Chicks be lifting legs now. It's a real thing. More like jugs, Judy. Stacked up.

There's nothing you can do for that. Finally, Jake. Kim Kardashian's 44. The goat. The hottest woman to ever live. The hottest woman to ever live. And it's all her fault, this whole ass thing. Yep, she started it.

Yep. She started it. Did you guys just miss all of the early 90s of hip-hop culture? Yes. We did. You had to tell me about Reasonable Doubt, Jake. That was like, what, 15 years ago? Look, you got there as soon as you could. I did. Let's go dead on this day. Still dead

first. Died at 47. Jack Kerouac. Oh. Big time for me and Danny. Yeah, who didn't carry around a copy of On the Road paperback in their back pocket. Yep. Like I mentioned last week, that was right there with, yeah, I'll watch Garden State for a thousandth time with you.

I'm trying to get laid by indie chicks. 1970, John T. Scopes. I used to get laid by indie chicks. 1970, John T. Scopes. The Evolution Guy, 1980, Hans Asperger. What do you think he invented? A disease.

In 2003, Fred Berry, Rerun. Oh, man. Born on this day, now dead. We've got Ronald McNair, Dan Re Now, born on this day, now dead, we've got Ronald McNair, Dan Wright's astronaut with a yeah, boo story. The yeah, the second African-American in space, the boo, died in the Challenger explosion. Oh, man.

Boo. The one that didn't really impact me. I was going to say, you had a little set on that early You know Also born on this day now Dead Carrie Fisher Princess Leia Did you give a shit about the Challenger

When it exploded Dan Or were you kind of like Oh wow You probably would have been Junior in high school or something Much like Jake's reaction to 9-11 Yeah He were in the lab immediately with

jokes okay yep same it did not affect me at all and in trouble immediately back in the vice principal's office because you why is it always you guys why is it always like I don't know, we're just funny. Deal with it. Dan has told us his CB handle was the challenger. I had a white 1977 Ford Pinto. It was the first car I ever had. And if you remember the Ford Pinto, Danny. Yeah, allegedly if you rear-ended a Pinto, it would explode because the gas tank was poorly poorly designed i believe there was some basis for that and there was a lot there's recalls immediately yeah yeah they've

fixed it might have happened to a few cars right yeah but then it was always known as that was the exploding car and yeah and it was white and i had a cb so it was out of my hands. It kind of just, the handle named itself, didn't it, Dan? It really wasn't your choice. And finally, Alfred Nobel. Of the prize? Founded the Nobel Prize and invented dynamite. I don't know if that's enough to be able to name the prize. Like, that's a pretty haughty move.

I invented one thing that's kind of cool and probably wasn't that hard. And you're like, now, forever, the thing that was the best invention this year shall be named after me. I don't know if we already had gunpowder. It's almost like rolling a joint. Packing it up, yeah. It's a gunpowder joint. Oh, man, brilliant, dude. Put we already had gunpowder. Wasn't it just like, it's almost like rolling a joint. Packing it up, yeah. It's a gunpowder joint. Oh, man. Brilliant, dude.

Put a fuse in it and run. This guy made a light bulb. What if you had tobacco was invented, but there was no way, and then you invented the cigarette? Wouldn't you be like, pretty good. Thank you. Man, I guess. You're figuring out a way for us to get high off this thing. I still just don't know about it.

I want to know about the process where he's trying to claim this is his bit forever. Did Hitler win one or was it just time man of the year? He was on the cover of Time, I believe. Person of the year? Mm-hmm. Did Obama win a Nobel Prize prize i think so yeah because now they have like the peace prize well trump was bitching about it the other day and do you he was bitching about no i just i just know that he was complaining saying that he should have got one if obama got one because really obama should have got one if Obama got one because really Obama should have got one.

All right, Dan. Well, what does the rest of the day have in store for you? What is it there? 3.15? I'm going to go to dinner with mom. So mom was complaining the other day because we went to dinner and she can't hear out of one ear because she's all old

and I guess that happens sometimes it's like one of the ears stop working so she couldn't hear like it was we're just yelling it was a loud restaurant so i have chosen a restaurant that i'm sure will be empty because we've been to it no no i've never been there it's vegan have Have you ever gone to a vegan place and seen anyone in there? Well, the only one I've ever been to was in a hippie avant-garde area of Fort Worth. Yeah. So that one's packed. But yeah, I would imagine in the land of sausage.

A vegan restaurant. Yeah, in general. I don't know why. I remember being looked at sideways When trying to order something without meat The last time I was up here And we were at breakfast with some friends And they were like what Can I get it without the sausage

They're like what What do you want us to do with it Put it in your butt Why don't you just walk across the street Take her there It's a nice place She'd be overwhelmed by the menu though Cheesecake factory

Menu and then it's also very loud It's a nice place. Yeah. She'd be overwhelmed by the menu, though. Cheesecake Factory? Yeah. Yeah, menu, and then it's also very loud in there. Very loud. Yeah. All right, well, we'll be back tomorrow. Dan will be back later on this week. Adios, mofo. We gotta go before this becomes a zoo.

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