The Dumb Zone FREE - DZ 10-7-24: Cowboys sneak past Steelers and Jake is back!!

Episode Date: October 7, 2024

Don't miss an episode of The Dumb Zone by subscribing at DumbZone.com or Patreon.com/TheDumbZoneThe Cowboys missing a few all-pros are still able to take down a 3-1 Steelers team in Pittsburgh, just change Snoop Dogg's name to Mr. NBC, and our sweet king is back (00:00) - Jake is back! (20:03) - Jake's announcement (01:04:30) - Sports: Cowboys beat Steelers (01:45:30) - Audio from the game (02:10:10) - Viewer Mail: Jake's 9/11 (02:19:17) - News: Teacher-Student sex in Comal (02:39:21) - Today in History: Larry King's Wiki page ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Hello, I'm professional broadcaster Dan McDowell, letting you know that you are about to hear one of our free podcasts. But, if you'd like to subscribe at dumbzone.com, you'll get four shows per week, plus the weekend wrap-up and any bonus sodes like our Business Wednesday interviews. So, if you forgot how to use the 15-second rewind, that's dumbzone.com to subscribe. Now, on to today's program. The Dumb Zone. Okay. I don't feel any good about this. I'm going to say this is one of the most important plays of the game.

Don't spoil it, BJ. Yeah. All right, no more timeouts. This is it. Oh, no. Oh, my God. Jake Ferguson fell down. Oh!

This is it. Oh, no. Oh, my God. Jake Ferguson fell down. Tolbert! Wow. Wow. Tolbert.

Wow. Even McCarkey can't believe it. I did all I could do to contain myself there. They told me grits was a part of the combo meal. Oh, Jerry. Hell yeah. I'm rubbing your belly, Joe. I almost killed Jerry. He almost had a heart attack.

All right, all right, all right, all right, all right. All right, all right, all right, all right, all right. I never listen. I'm going to listen. I want to listen to the drums. I'm gonna listen. All right. Let's see here.

It is Monday. Happy Monday, everybody. It is the 7th of October. All right, all right, all right. It is show number 245 for The Dumb Zone. I'm Dan McDowell. I'm Jay Kemp. I'm Blake Jones.

And we are here with you again. We are in our studio in downtown, DZTV studio in downtown Dallas. We are live streaming on the YouTube today. If you are listening to us later, as most people will do, you can go back and say, oh, yeah, look it. There they are. They're in a TV studio. What's the deal with that?

I thought they were like a radio show. And generally, I mean, it's Monday. So generally, we might hop right into football, but I got to tell you guys, man, I mean, you called me yesterday, and we're like, were you watching this? This Padres-Dodgers? Donny Brook?

Donny Brook? The Padres might be a team of destiny, Daniel. Just great games all up and down. You think I would miss the boys of October? Dude, I'll tell you what. A.J. Preller? Yeah. He's a guy who will take some big swings, some big trades.

How about on Saturday? You know, there was a big play. Royals-Yankees tied, seventh inning, 5-5. Jazz Chisholm heading to second. Was the tag there? I don't know, but I know that the Royals manager, who is? The Royals manager is pushing all the right buttons.

Well, in this situation, he challenged it, and he did not win that challenge. Jazz Chisholm Trail ended up scoring the winning run of that one, 6-5. That was a great game. You know what? I probably forgot to mention that baseball talk, and I have a little more. I mean, I have a little more. It's baseball.

I talk over it. We could do the whole show. What else would you do? The talk in sport. We're going to say it. What else would you do? The talking sport. We're going to say it's brought to you by Elite Rides DFW because that's like our newest sponsor. Oh, my. And they picked us up today at the den. They have their own water?

Yeah. QR code, no less. Yeah, they have their own water. So it's EliteRides-DFW.com, and we got a promo code DZ15 for 15% off your first ride when you book via phone or website. So I guess they got a phone number too, which is 844-RIDE-DFW. Yeah, that was pretty sweet. How'd they get that? That was pretty sweet.

It was really sweet. They have a Tesla in their fleet, but they didn't pick us up in the Tesla. What were we in? We were in a decked out Suburban. Okay. So they have the Tesla. They also have a Sprinter. Dude, how great.

It's kind of like a party bus, which is great for games, concerts. Said he's picking somebody up in Galveston for a big family trip. What? Yeah. I thought it was just DFW. No, the name belies their full scope. Yeah, but they definitely will cover anything in DFW. I was wondering, are they going to go pick me up?

Do they go all the way out to South? They're laughing. Come on. Of course, yeah. Get serious. So, yeah, I think they're really, to me, it felt like this would be great for, like, going to a game. Yes.

Or a concert or something. You want to do a little drinking or something, you know? Yeah. Get that drive there and drive back, and it's, like, it's elite. It's in luxury. It's great. So he dropped you off and he's going to pick you up? And he's going to pick us up.

Yeah. Wow. But how great was it just to be able to kind of get online? Yeah, it works. Didn't even think about a thing. Weren't worried about traffic. Wasn't trying to weave in and out like you. You didn't have the smells of the dart train like I did?

No, man. Nobody whipped it out like you might see on the dart train. He said they're pricey. I will whip it out if you want on the way home. And with the tinted windows? Although I don't know that me exposing myself is whipping it out. It's kind of like a... Oh, look at it poking out.

No, no, here it is. Is it like when you pour water on one of those little foam things you had when you were a kid and it just slowly kind of expands? Really, what we're trying to tell you is it was a great ride. You could whip it out if you want. Very competitive, he said. Typically cheaper than your big Uber. They got a big party. They got the Sprinter. Take a trip. 844-RIDE-DFW.

It is elite. EliteRides-DFW.com Promo code DZ15. How about some water? You can go to our website, dumbzone.com, and it's on the promo code page. I put it up on the way in. I'm like, oh,

new sponsor. So I could just do that on the way in. That's incredible, Dan. Hey, thanks, man. I wanted some affirmation from somebody, and Blake's just staring at me. How about Pete the Polar Bear Alonzo? You spelled it wrong, but it's okay.

You guys probably covered that on Friday for a full show. Wait, spelled what wrong? Elite. I fixed it for you. I did? Slippin' dog. There's a T in there. But it sounds like you two were doing a little hand stuff.

We were doing hand stuff. You were distracted. We were toasting each other with the water. Yeah. Anyway, so that's bringing us baseball talk today. And did you see, can we play this video? Did you see the cool

profile robbing Mookie Betts of a home run? What do you think? Of course I did. You probably saw it live, right? Yeah, of course. Alright, let's pull it up and watch it and describe it for people, because there it goes. Mookie Betts.

Dude. And you think he's like, did he catch it? Did he catch it? He's just kind of standing there. Mookie Betts is celebrating. He's pumping his fist going around. Got the graphic on the television. Mookie Betts is rounding the bases, thinking that it's a home run.

Jerickson Profar says, uh-uh, I got it. Dude, that's awesome. Got the graphic on the television. Dude, that's awesome. He was staring down the crowd. Oh, yeah. Stopping him down. How about the fact that Profar is good? No. Like, he's kind of great.

Wow. Barely. Wow. Wow. Wow. Barely. That's baller right there. That's cool. That is awesome. That is a baller move. You know, I mean, Preller probably drafted him. Wouldn't you think?

Uh, yeah. So. I guess so. Yeah, because my bit is all the gms and the uh vp you know there's chris young aj preller aj preller you know all the all the greats all the yeah you got good god pro far had a 4.3 war this year he was good i mean i know it's surprising to you guys it's not as surprising to me but yeah you thought it was 4.1 and you year? He was good. I mean, I know it's surprising to you guys. It's not as surprising to me, but. Yeah, you thought it was 4.1.

And you're like, oh, my gosh. Anyway. Guardians defending the bridge. Tell you what. We really need that in Cleveland because the other team not doing so well. Yeah. Might want to break off some Browns talk. I saw a stat that – well, this is baseball.

I'm sorry. I want to respect America's pastime. Go ahead. I mean, here on the dumb zone, we could just do anything. I think his numbers, by some advanced stats, of course, we're speaking of Deshaun, Happy, Baby Pose, Watson, are the worst of any Browns quarterback in the last 20 years, like with a minimum of 100 dropbacks.

You go down that whole damn t-shirt that people have to curve around at the bottom of all the quarterback names. He's been the worst. Manziel's probably top 10 out of the 25. And he's got $250 million guaranteed.

They can't bench him even though they got Jameis sitting right there. Dude, Jameis. Like if they had freaking, what's his name, Cooper Rush, maybe. Jameis. Flacco got him to the playoffs. Oh, sports. So much sports. So now we must do a weekend check.

And before we even do that, let's just get one more plug in here for pro slat was this wall up here last time you were in studio i'm freaking amazed it wasn't no that is incredible rob can even put up a uh time lapse video if if you want but uh this is the garage they're the garage remodelers or what would would we say? The garage fixers. They will help you organize your garage. If you've- Get your garage right. If you can only fit one car in your two-car garage, or maybe even no cars, they will come in. They will help you organize everything.

Go to proslat.com, right? Is that the website? Proslat.com, right? Is that the website? Proslat.com. And they are a long-term partner with us, and you will just see what they can do at proslat.com. We were out at their brick-and-mortar building, which is in Richardson, Central and Arapaho, or you don't call it Central once you get up that high,

75 and Arapaho, and it don't call it Central once you get up that high. 75 in Arapaho. And it's great. Their showroom is awesome. I will be consulting with ProSlat.com and ProSlat. Yeah, for your new. Yeah. Yeah. Your remodeling of the house. Much like Brussels sprouts, garages have had quite the come up, the glow up, if you will, over the last 15 years.

Your garage used to just be some old junky space. It was nasty. And now. So you feel Brussels sprouts have made a comeback? Nobody wants to co-sign me on that? Danny can. He's a food man. Brussels sprouts, when I was growing up, came out of a can. Well, yeah. You dress anything up with bacon grease and rapid and stuff. Well, it doesn't have to be the bacon grease. Now you can throw them in the air fryer. You put like cranberries on them or you can properly season them and take care of them. Again, but the taste of the Brussels sprout has not changed.

I don't know. How you make them. Okay, so garage. Hold on here. Garages are Brussels sprouts. Yeah. ProSlat is the bacon and all the awesome stuff. Like a garage is just a garage.

It's just a hole. I don't want that. But a ProSlat will fix it up for you. Yeah, a little vinegar. It's the icing. It's all the bells, the whistles. Whatever you want. Like it makes it awesome.

That's right. Like the garage is your root wife. ProSlat is the makeup and the push-up bra and the boob job. Yeah, ProSlat is the boob job of garages. Yeah, no, I see that on the copy. It's the stuff, what are you, injecting your lips, that kind of stuff. Filler, yeah, for sure. Yeah.

I thought we were pretty solid with one analogy, but if you felt that... Or the extra stitch. Pro slat is the extra stitch from that. Just disgusting. Oh, man, it's good to be here. Well, anyway, you probably already know this. Brat Summer is over. Yeah, Brat Summer been over, dog.

We got into... Yeah, but now you're here. Yeah, yeah, but what was that big that big uh real heavy black girl on tiktok demure precious no they're not all named precious oh lizzo no you want to keep going i think i'm out we were done with brad summer after like a month we moved on to demure. We should also say Danny Bayless is in studio here. Hell yeah. Look at that. He's been in

I don't know if you know this. Morning. He's been in here quite a bit. Yeah. I missed one. But TC stepped up. I heard about that. Yeah. Jesus Christ.

Oh, he's not really guest host today. Today he's just here. Dude, I just got to say, you ripped the shit out of that solo. I didn't make that. I know you didn't. What do you think? I think you're in there like... I need a cool song about me. Donald Fagan doing like 100 tracks for a stupid.

Who did that? Is that Jameson? So. I don't know. Jesus Christ. What are you doing right now? Banana? He's mad at that banana and he's projecting it on me.

So I was going to have a. I wanted to do this just to show you guys that I care. Because you hate when I eat an apple. He's going to mushy food that doesn't crunch. Respect. That's how much he cares about you. Can we maybe do it not when we're live? What do you mean? I thought you'd want to watch me eat a banana.

We had that fantastic ride on the way over here from Elite Rides DFW. There's a break. There's after the show. No, I need a... Because we start the shows on Monday at 11-11, I'm heating up my food again. And so now

my eating schedule's off. I'd usually be eating lunch right now. And so I have to have my post-show apple pre-show and my protein drink. I'll give you a protein drink yep um but i thought okay i'll have instead of a pre-show apple because the guys hate when i eat an apple in front of them i will eat a banana and therefore not only will you not hear the crunching but you'll be eroticized

by watching me eat a banana sure how. How can I maintain focus? Yeah. Anyway. So are you going to eat it? We can chat. Well, I thought we were going to, it's like story time, you haven't been here, and that's kind of the elephant. You're going to take a couple plays off

and get a little bit of fish. I was just going to sit around and enjoy the story and eat a banana. Okay. But for those listening, you didn't have to point it out. You're just a very regimented person, and I have not seen you eat a banana. Right.

And I bought these bananas. This is my weekend check. I went to the grocery store, and I said, I know I'm seeing the play ahead of me because last week, and maybe even the week before, I had to eat a pre-show apple in front of Blake. Yeah. And I could just feel his disdain. Oh, there's a reason. In the air. It was palpable, I'm sure.

And so I thought, you know what? I bet they'd love it if I ate a banana. Yeah. I had some Brussels sprouts, but then I thought, no, that's weird. I would again vote for no eating when we're talking to each other. But you know what? I'm behind the eight ball here a little bit, so I got to work my way back. You can just come back and make demands.

It's cool. Okay, so that's my weekend check. Okay. Does anybody else want to throw in a quick hit? Because I think we all want to hear what Jake says. I got a fitness tracker watch and replaced the old one, and this one is better because it doesn't account my masturbating as steps.

So it's an upgrade. What brand are we working with there? We went full Garmin, homie. Garmin. GPS and everything? Yeah. That's old school Garmin. It's amazing.

Danny hit a step goal while whacking it. Yeah. That's awesome. It started vibrating. I'm like, 10,000? I haven't moved. Yeah, I haven't done steps, 10,000? I haven't moved.

Yeah, I haven't done steps, but the whoop used to ask me what activity I was doing when I was driving home in traffic because my heart rate would get so high for like a 20-minute period, and then I would just log it as like football. Yes, mid-afternoon football. He was either road jacking or thinking about football. Yeah, that's right.

Both of those things will elevate your heart rate. I've even had it whenever I was chasing my kids around. Because if your heart rate is over 120 for more than 10 minutes, it'll ask you what you're doing. It doesn't have parenting or whatever, something like rowing. You get it when you're watching... What was the... He was watching video game people yesterday

during the Cowboy game. Oh. That one hurt. It was like a major. They took a tough L? Yep. Onyx? They got reverse swept in the grand finals.

Was it Onyx? No. What was it called? FaZe Clan? Halo. Okay, you're watching people play Halo online. Yeah, Halo grand finals. We have the Cowboy game in front of us.

He's watching Halo. Unbelievable. I wanted to watch something I cared about. We'll get to that. My turn? Yeah, so I went to the grocery store yesterday. Took my boy with me. Did the Sunday shopping.

Didn't buy bananas. Did not buy bananas, although I needed bananas. We forgot to put it on the list. I could share one with you. I probably can get ahold of some. We could start at each side and just see. Just lady and the tramp, that thing. Grocery store with the boys, a good time.

Went bowling. Hell yeah. Went bowling. Don't have it anymore, necessarily. I think I hit like 130. Do you bowl left-handed? No. I don't do anything left-handed except for right and jerk it and eat.

So really the central parts of my existence. The important parts of life. Yeah, but I'm a straight thrower. I don't give it any spin. I just wing that center right. You amateur. Speaking of thrower, a lot of speculation online that perhaps that has been Jake's absence. Oh, just kidding.

I was in the lab. Like, you will be back, and you'll be hitting 88 on the gun with movement. Maybe it was a... Maybe you got quick Tommy John that you can really recover quickly from those things now. And add Velo. Right. Maybe other, he was under the knife for other. You recall the speculation about a name change and like invert your wiener and all of a sudden

you're a lady. I'm Jackie now. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I'm in the Olympics. We said Jacqueline. Yeah. They put me in a Ted Cruz campaign ad. You'm in the olympics we said jacklin yeah they put me in a ted cruz campaign ad you're in the wnba because i'm just mossing the shit out of five seven ladies uh so yeah

no you do it just so that you can win pickup basketball games with ladies that would be pretty you don't even do it for the wnba just run at run at the gym. I got some ice cream. And then also yesterday, I checked out of rehab. Whoa. That's where you were? That's right, Dan. I kept calling you. I know. Yeah.

For like a month. I forgot to tell you about it. But that's what I did. I bit the bullet. Social media rehab? Honestly, I'll get to that. But I didn't have my phone for 27 days. And everyone should do that if you can. What, go to rehab?

Go no phone and just basically if – I wish insurance would pay for it without you having to tell them that you have any sort of substance problem. Maybe not a month, but like two weeks, you do nothing but like work on yourself. And you can watch TV, I guess, if you want, but it's like a, as I'll get into, if you want it to be, it can be like a 16 hour a day bootcamp for your mind, body, and soul. So I decided I was going to do this in obviously in conjunction with my wife before we went to Cleveland. So I just I was going to do this, obviously in conjunction with my wife, before we went to Cleveland. So we drove down there the next day. So for my situation, as I learned when I got there. Was Jake here when I had to get the new battery for my phone?

Because I went an hour without my phone, and it was like the most excruciating hour that i've lived try taking a dump for 27 days without one without a phone you're like what do i do and you you do like four times a day yeah that's a lot of dumps a lot of time you know um that was while he was here because we mocked you for printing out your workout oh that's right oh okay but i just know being without a phone it's it's terrible yeah like i it's terrible the way i feel about being without a phone like i can't if i get in the car to go to the grocery store i forgot my phone turn around you could be in the parking lot i was just going for five minute drive and five

minute back but i have to have that phone all right sorry no you're good that's probably not as important as going to rehab yeah and that's what I call it, by the way. They want you to call it inpatient treatment or a treatment facility, but let's be honest. It's fucking rehab. Well, it's both, I guess, right? Yeah, but we don't need to dress it up. They're treating you. I still call it Indian style when I sit down, you know?

Yeah. So my wife and I had made the decision before we went to Cleveland, and she just drove me down the next day. And for me, it was pretty much her idea than your idea. Um, maybe, but honestly, like I know, you know, it wasn't like an ultimatum, but I know I, well, something I have to guard against when I talk about this is when I got there and really started talking to people realized I was not, I was not necessarily consuming my DOC drug of choice to the degree that basically anyone else there might've been, but I still wasn't going to be able to stop completely,

which is what I wanted to do on my own. It just wasn't going to happen. I needed like a drastic measure because I could cut back. I could stop for a month. Last year I stopped anything for five months. And then we got sued and I lost my fucking mind. But I just had to buy in and be like, I haven't tried this. Can you say what your DOC is? I think, yeah. It's donuts. No, yeah, just alcohol.

I don't have a problem with anything else. I've tried a lot of other stuff and I've never had a problem with it. Which is also kind of unique because that's just based on my experiences. Yeah, we own our own business, so that made it a lot easier.

Dan and Blake were both super to just go for three and a half weeks. You were kind of the push over the edge of like, it's fine. We got it it it's not the end of the world uh blake and i went to dinner the night before we got back and talked about it y'all were both super supportive um and then eventually when we talked to the whole team everybody was super supportive so i was like you know what let's just let's just do it um it's gonna suck but it's the

only way i'm gonna get to where i want to go to where I can be the best version of me in every way. And obviously there were parts of it that were horrible. Most of what we're going to talk about, probably in like an extra weekly podcast series, is how flat out hilarious the whole experience is. This is just like the serious part, I guess. Get it out of the way, and then I can tell you about I got stung by a scorpion. What? How that whole morning went. That part of the treatment? It might have been. You know, it's

funny you say that because there were a lot of things that happened there that would be really frustrating. Lack of communication, lack of organization. And I thought, maybe they're doing this to piss us off to see how we react. Like, is this a genius?

Is it like Jerry? Right. You know, and the way he runs a team, he's like, you know, our consistency is that we're inconsistent. Yes. That's sometimes how it felt. Because life is going to be full of things that suck. Yeah.

So why don't we make it suck more than it would in regular life by, you know. Yeah. So it's not like a resort vacation. No. Where everything is waiting on your hand and foot. No, it was in a nice place. It was down near the hill country, like south part of the hill country. And it was a really pretty place.

It used to be a hunting lodge. It sits on like several thousand acres. I love that part of the state i would not have wanted to do it in a city you know like i could take it was a lot of walks there was a gym which was better than i thought it would be um and i'll get to all that as we talk about it but basically i wasn't going to pull this off without a pretty drastic measure. And so for me, like I basically started consuming alcohol the way that I think most people do, like in college. I wasn't trying to mask any pain or address some sort of like emotional situation. I was just drinking because it was fun and that's what people did. And it was fun.

It was pretty awesome. And it was fun. It was pretty awesome. And then as I got older and older, it was like, well, this actually makes me feel better and forget about things that I don't want to think about. You know what I mean? And then also, I think it's a great lubricant for meeting people and learning about people. It's like when Kristen and I would travel, if you want to find out what people who are wherever you are in some far-flung country, if you want to find out how they live and what they think, go to the bar. That's what you did with the – somewhere in Mexico, you just ran into a bunch of Canadians or something? What was that? Yeah, that was in Puerto Vallarta at 11 o'clock, have a few, and you're going to have a good time. You're going to learn something. And you're going to learn about stuff that you're not going to get on a tour.

So I do enjoy that part of it. But for me, it just became, as I got older, like a, hey, I have some problems. And this thing is a problem because I'm using it to cover up those problems rather than actually trying to address it. And I've been to therapy. There is a lot of value in that. Last year, I went to like group therapy in Southlake. It's not AA. It's a class.

It's basically like a college class. It was eight to ten weeks, three nights a week. And you're just in a room with like 10 or 12 other people and you talk and they'll show you Ted talks and stuff like that. But mainly the talking part was helpful. And that was weird because that one was like, dude, there was never a time I was in there that there wasn't at least one pilot from American airlines, at least two like surgeons, you know, not like, Hey, I'm an RN or I'm a nurse, like a neurosurgeon and an anesthesiologist and an ER trauma surgeon and a CEO of some company and, you know, a software executive. Probably some lawyers. Oh yeah. Definitely a few lawyers. This time was a

little different. This time was a little different as I'll get to, but you know, as they say, like it doesn't discriminate. And so for me, it just, I, I wasn't stopping, you know, they say like it doesn't discriminate and so for me it just i i wasn't stopping you know i would stop for a little while like i said when i did that bit last year i stopped for four or five months and then i was able to kind of keep it in check for a few months and so did you like have to detox well so physically you're yeah i mean you had to have it and then the first couple nights like i'm thinking of a hardcore drug rehab or something where they're shaking in the bed and puking in a bucket next to the bed. Yeah, so I was going to get to that later, but since you brought it up, I can tell you that I didn't really have that issue. I did have like a couple drinks on the way down with my wife because I was really freaking out.

And I got made fun of by people there, like in a gallows humor, joking type way for blowing like a.07. They make you do that right when you walk in the door? Oh, yeah. And several other people were like, yeah, I don't remember getting here. Oh, they were just saying that's weak. They were like four times the legal limit. And these are some of them were just normal, you know, you would look at them and not think like, oh, this guy's

a junkie or something. So those people, if you're in really bad shape, you're going to have some pretty serious detox time. And they give you like a ton of medication if you want it. So they have like what they call a taper, which I guess is just supposed to do what it says it does, like taper you down so that you don't have like crazy withdrawals because you could die if you're it. So they have what they call a taper, which I guess is just supposed to do what it says it does, like taper you down so that you don't have crazy withdrawals

because you could die if you're bad enough. Yeah, in the old days, if you were so physically dependent upon alcohol and you just quit cold turkey, it would literally kill you. Yeah, heroin and alcohol, that will kill you. So what, they give you like one beer a day or something? No, no, no, it's a medication that kind of seemed like it was, well, I have heard of that.

Not light beer for this week. In some ways, that's kind of what I did. Like I went from, hey, I'm having four or five, you know, almost every day to like before I left down to, like I said, two. On Sundays, they give you a placebo in the form of a Coors Cutter. Well, dude, I mean, you remember Uncle Daycare on Gillian Keeves? Yeah. They're like, they're scheduled for one beer at 8 o'clock, one beer at 1130. So they don't give you alcohol, but they'll give you what they call a taper,

which seemed like it was a feel-good drug of the highest degree. Did you get any of that? No, I didn't take anything. Ah. I didn't need it. They wanted me to take an anti-seizure medication. I was like, I've never had a I didn't take anything. I didn't need it. They wanted me to take an anti-seizure medication. I was like, I've never had a seizure and I'm not about to have a seizure. Like, look at my levels, look at my blood pressure. They'll give you like

an insanely high dosage of sleep medication of the same medication I take, but I take 50 of it, 50 milligrams, which is the lowest one they make. And I don't even know if it works for me anymore. of it, 50 milligrams, which is the lowest one they make. And I don't even know if it works for me anymore. They would be giving people two or 300 milligrams and they are just gone for four or five days. Okay. Let me ask you this. I got there. I was like, I don't want any medication. I'm not having any problems. When can I go work out? And they're like, not for five or six days. And I got them to convince me to let me do it on day three. They don't want you working out because you could die. So I didn't take anything. And during that time also, you don't have to go to any meetings, any appointments, any group time,

because they assume you're fucked up to the point where they don't need you walking around. Whereas for me, like on the second day, I read half of Boys in the Boat and walked like four miles. Did any of the staff at any point check in on you and you're kind of fine and normal and go, are you sure you're supposed to be here? Well, no. I mean, because there's a couple things. You described it at other people making fun of you for blowing a.06. And these guys are showing up like four or five times over the legal limit. Yeah, but it's still just a thing of it's alcohol. the day before i was they don't know that yeah that's true

you know and it's still with alcohol and with opiates you're gonna have to have a bad time uh most people for me i i was just depressed because i was there and i was fucking crushed and i missed my family and i missed you guys If you look at my journal from the first couple days, it's pretty rough. But then I just started going to everything. I just started going to classes. They're like, you know, you don't – they would literally tell you, like, you don't have to do this. I'm like, I'm not just going to lay there all day. Yeah.

You're like Zeke being in the quarterback meetings. Yeah. Exactly right. You're the Zeke of the rehab center. That's exactly right. So did you have something you wanted to – A little bit slower than we thought you were. Did you have something you wanted to say before I –

I feel like you were about to interject. I was, but then I don't know because I know we want to save some of this. I've got 10 hours of stuff. You know, if we just do like a business wednesday type series and just talk every wednesday for an hour or something like that's it's good for the subbies and all that kind of stuff it's good stuff to keep it behind a paywall i was going to just ask because you mentioned going to sleep and i remember when i was uh drinking quite a bit more back in the day,

and I remember a movie that I saw. It was Rodney Dangerfield, and he was a guy just doing lots of drugs and drinking and all this kind of stuff. And in order to get an inheritance, he had to clean up. He had to be cleaned for like a year or something. I can't remember the movie's name. Was it Brewster's Millions? It's not that because that was a different actor. But what his line was that me and my buddies would always reference was,

I don't know how to go to sleep. I only know how to pass out. And that was like my life. Yeah, I wasn't doing that. For some time. Okay, that's what I didn't like. So you're still able to go to bed and get to sleep and not with that? Okay. Yeah, I mean,

I was, obviously, some days, like, hiding it from my wife, but I would not get to the point, usually, where it was, like, super obvious. But I was still, if you're hiding it, if there's something that you're hiding... Easy money, Rob tells me. That's what it's called. If there's something that you're hiding

or something that you want to quit and you can't quit on your own, then you Rob tells me. That's what it's called. If there's something that you're hiding or something that you want to quit and you can't quit on your own, then you have a problem. Yeah. No matter what it is. No matter how much you're doing, that's just what it is, and that's what it was for me. There's no other way to describe it than that. So there's a timeline, again, is like after last year when we got sued,

I know we talked about it openly and emotionally, but I had a really hard time with that. Like I was enraged by the whole thing. I really wanted to like hurt somebody. I was sad. I was depressed. I had like a breakdown and I was like, I can't. Probably scared a little bit too.

For sure. And so I just started back up and never really completely stopped again. So I wanted to. I don't want to moderate. I don't want to cut back. I wanted to stop. You know, because I want to. I don't want to moderate. I don't want to cut back. I wanted to stop. Because I want to be alive. I want to be healthy.

So are you no longer a guy that can just have a beer? No. I mean, obviously there's always going to be a part of me. I guess I'll just speak for me. We use I statements here. Is that what they say? Of course. There's always going to be a small part of me that thinks that I could,

but I also know what that comes with. I mean, dude, there were people there. There was a guy there who was in his mid-40s. Can you still do blow? Please tell me yes. We'll see. Okay. Yeah, we'll see.

Tell me yes. There was a guy there. H? Latino guy. And when I talk about these people, I am going to mention their races every time. That's an important factor here, and it's okay to do because it was not all white people. Okay. You know, usually when it's like 90% white people, you don't say like, oh, he was a white guy.

Okay. At least white people don't say that. So this guy is a Latino guy from Amarillo. Super cool dude. Gave me a haircut while I was there. Okay, yeah. He cuts hair on the weekend. Yeah yeah i got two of them up which i'll explain um he was sober for 10 years from like 28 to 39 and went on vacation and drank once and went on like a three and a half year bender so kind of like remember josh hamilton like had one beer and all of a sudden his shirt's off.

People licking whipped cream off his nipples. He's buying Coke. He's doing everything. Like from one beer. Yeah. So, you know, you get into a lot of stuff that they teach you about. A lot of the stuff I knew because these people only have so much material for the curriculum.

You know, I'd seen a bunch of the videos before. Um, I'd like the Ted talks. So the worksheets and the, the cognitive behavioral therapy and all that, mostly what it is, is it's just like the feeling of this would, this deal where I have no freedom at all.

This is what my life would be like if I really fucked up, but not quite there. Um, this is what it would be like if I really fucked up but not quite there um this is what it would be if i lost my family because i can't see them i can't talk to them so that plus hearing from other people and their experiences like really is the program it's the people so do you identify now with jim irsay are you like that's a brother of mine now that man i don't know because i can get along i know that he bought the big book original manuscript for several million dollars, but man, he still, I think he lives pretty wild still. Just in a different way. Yeah.

I don't know. I feel like he's been arrested since then. But in any case, you know. It sounds like what you're describing is seeing all the lives of these people that you were in there with. You were kind of seeing possible. Scared straight. seeing all the lives of these people that you were in there with, you were kind of seeing possible outer lines of a potential ripple effect if you'd have stayed on the same path. Yeah, and also those people also have a great chance if they put the work in for that to be their last time too.

If you're alive, you have a chance. So I'm not saying that mine was so much better, and oh, now I know from seeing how bad theirs was mine was bad because I couldn't stop and so you know there's obvious like disease choice thing which I know Dan and I have talked about before there's a really I'd seen this movie before is it a disease so there's this really corny thing on YouTube um the production is ridiculously corny it could it's I think it's an hour and a half it could easily be 40 minutes but it's called pleasure unwoven and it's by a doctor named kevin mccauley

he was a doctor in the military and eventually was a doctor in the military who was in jail in the military for writing his fake scripts for himself and taking like 50 pills a day but he has like a really good breakdown of the whole thing and i also understand there are going to be some people who never see it that way the way he puts it and walks it through is it's not a disease it's not a choice it's a disease of choice so in your situation of i think the one he uses is like it's an old west saloon and uh you know there's an alcoholic which he makes look really funny because the production is hilarious. His face is all messed up.

He's rubbing his lip all drunk style Old West. And a guy hands him a glass of whiskey and says, you can have this, but I'm going to shoot you in the head. And the guy says, well, no, I'm not going to have it. So that would say it's a choice. Yeah. But his point is that – You can say that about cancer. His point is that –

That if you don't get rid of that cancer, else. Right. That the guy who is an addict is still kind of thinking, I want that, and still kind of thinking, I wonder if he actually has bullets, or still thinking, you know what, I don't even care as long as I get the drink first. Yeah. Or maybe the gun won't fire. And that part of it in your brain

is what he would say satisfies. But I don't care. There's going to be people who don't see it that way and I fully understand that and accept it. There's going to be people that are like, Like you can't check into a cancer rehab center and then just because you're away from the cancer, it means you're

healed. No, but it's kind of like with diabetes for example. Some people eat their way into diabetes. And you can eat your way out of it. And if you get treatment and you do the right things and eat your way out of it, it can either become a non-factor in your life or you can't cure it,

but you can have it not affect you anymore. Diabetes is widely accepted as a disease, type two anyways, as like a, you kind of got yourself here. You know what I mean? Yeah. affect you anymore. Diabetes is widely accepted as a disease. Type 2 anyways. You kind of got yourself here. You know what I mean? Yeah. And a lot of people with diabetes too still eat like shit. They can't stop. Is high blood pressure a disease?

Yeah, cholesterol, high blood pressure, stuff like that. Because that's why I started eating a lot better. Yeah, my cholesterol was a little high. And losing some weight because they're like, this will help you lower your blood pressure, and then they're like, eh, but you haven't lost enough, so here, we'll just give you this medicine.

Yeah, which I'm sure there's no side effects from. I don't know. So the last thing I'll just say, I guess, and we'll talk about this a lot. People have questions. I'll try to answer them on the show. I'm not going to probably answer every email because there's a lot, but I do have some hilarious stories.

Maybe I'll tell you just a little bit here, and then we'll save them for the separate series. But I do think in some ways having this job prevented me from taking more drastic steps earlier because I didn't really ever want to. No, that's where he blames us. No, no, no. It's okay.

Yeah. I don't, I was always really embarrassed. You know, I didn't want, like some people you have a job. I mean, even like I said, those pilots or those doctors, like they're. Oh, embarrassed about the public knowing. Yeah. And even, yeah, the public knowing and having to say to people in a very different way. People I would talk to would be like, man, I'm going to have to tell so many people. There's got to be at least 20 people that I'm going to have to break this down to.

And I'm like, yeah, well, mine might be in the tens of thousands. Totally. So cocky. But the good news is I kind of only have to do it once you know yeah it's just a really weird deal that most people that once and every wednesday for the next uh yeah but that part's fine i just mean this part that sucks of admitting it owning it feeling shame about being away from the show did you have to say that you have to say hi my name is Jake, and I'm an alcoholic?

You could say recovering alcoholic. That's only AA, though. The rest of the program. Okay, so this isn't AA. You have to go to AA every night for one hour. During this? Yeah. Okay. And it's led by someone there.

I led two of them, you know. Oh, all right. Yeah, felt back in the element a little bit. People were really into the- Kind of used to this, public speaking. Dude, honestly, I- Did you guys talk cowboys? I made an-

I also have a lot of watching cowboys with people in treatment talk for you. Okay. Dude, I made an outline for- Why are they running the ball again? They keep going nowhere. They're the reason I'm here. I, no doubt. Yeah.

I made like a run sheet for the two aa meetings i led like it was a show okay you had news at the end and why today doesn't suck and sponsors like literally this dark story is brought to you by pro slat yeah yeah so uh you didn't have to do that in class though you know it was just a class where you'd be an hour and there'd be 15 minutes of a break um you didn't have to introduce yourself like that because okay really dude it is like being on the real world addicts because you're with the same people all the time and maybe you've seen that okay i've never seen that no no i've made that up but it's something that i'm sorry it just sounds like a dr drew show no no they have like celebrity

rehab yeah yeah yeah okay time but we all were like i'll waive my hippo rights if we can get this thing sold because every single day if not one there were or if not uh at least one, or if not at least one, two or three crazy shit that would happen. Crazy. I mean, you got 40 people who are all kind of trying to quit drugs or alcohol, who go to class together, they eat together, we're in rec, like we're volleyball. All dudes? No.

No, it was probably 60% dudes. Some hooking up? No. I mean, I've heard that that does happen for sure. Do they say anything at the beginning like, hey, if we find out that you guys are hooking up, you're kicked out? Yeah, I don't know if they kick you out, but I know that it's definitely not good. know that it's definitely not good. Because I would imagine for a lot of people that go through addiction,

they go through treatment like that, sometimes it's replacing one with another, and sex can definitely fall under that category. Yeah, and so there was a guy who worked there who was awesome. He was like the guy that led fitness. They had workout classes twice a week that he would lead with 12 dudes, usually the younger dudes in one, the older dudes in another. And if you wanted to go – What are you?

Younger, for sure. Okay, I didn't know. If you wanted to like really get after it, that 45, 50-minute workout was easily as hard as anything I ever did in APEC in Fort Worth where Mahomes and all those guys trained. Like if you wanted to go get it, my workout partner was like a 26-year-old dude, Latino dude who was a mailman who had a cocaine problem. He was not really a drinker.

He was just sprint between houses. We got fucking after it. Big time. He was done by noon. Yeah. So I don't even remember how I started talking about that. Oh, the guy who led the fitness class? Oh, yeah.

He just got out of treatment like a year and a half ago. Oh, the guy who led the fitness class? Oh, yeah. He just got out of treatment like a year and a half ago. Oh, okay. And he's like, in the orientation thing, he's like, do not get a rehab boyfriend or girlfriend. He's like, trust me. Oh. He's like, it's a bad idea. Oh, now I'm interested.

He's like, you've got two red flags. Yeah. Walking red flag. What are we teamed up? That's your foundation. That's the greatest sex you'll ever have. He just kind of looked at all of us and was like, just trust me. Because you know you'll get kicked out.

Then if you get kicked out. But we got each other, baby. Yeah. Just check into a hotel and go on a bender with her. Yeah. That sounds like a great idea. Be great. Yeah.

God, I bet that happens all the time. Yeah. I mean, listen, dude. Uh, yeah, I mean, listen, dude, somehow I was not really thinking about that part of my, uh, my, I guess, brain or anatomy at all, but there definitely were dudes who were like, there were some horny motherfuckers in there and most of them had been to prison, which I think in prison, it's pretty common to verbally, constantly abuse and hit on the correctional officers. And maybe whip it out and show it to them. Okay. Do you see any whipping it out? I heard of one.

We're saving this for Wednesday. I heard of one. Okay. I heard of one. So the way I heard of it was from my roommate. So when you first get there, they make you go to a detox thing even if you're not detoxing, you don't have to go to class if you want. So I did, you're in a room and it's like a, like I said, it's an old hunting lodge. So, and like, I think it became a wedding venue. So imagine a room. I don't know. This is kind of hard to explain, but it's basically from the pro slat wall, thankyouproslat.com, to where Rob sits.

So I don't know what that distance is. And then the detox, there would be three beds in there. And it was nice. And a TV. So then you have two roommates and there's a nice bathroom. Then they move you after like 10 days to a smaller room. That one just has two beds, but it's also a nicer room. I mean, it's not like you're in a motel. How much stuff do you pack? Like, is it just a carry-on? I don't know. I brought, like, our big suitcase.

Yeah, and my wife shipped me some stuff. Because do you do laundry and stuff? Yeah. This is probably too much. We'll get into that. No, you do laundry. I will tell you one thing about taking my wife's suitcase. She took it on her most recent work trip, and I thought I got everything out of it.

And then when they take everything out of all your bags. I was going to say, they got to search probably. It takes like four hours before you get your stuff. You can't have a shampoo bottle. Everything has to be closed. Because it might be. Nothing open. The jack, the flashlight.

Hold on. Not quite. So they take everything flashlight? Hold on. Not quite. But so they take everything out of every one of your bags. They don't give you a lot of your stuff until you move around. Did they check your anus? No, but they did have me like lift my sack up. And I heard about. So you get a nude check.

I heard about a girl a week after I got there. I didn't find out until the next day because as I'll get to, I was getting in bed at 745 every night. So when I would get up in the morning, I would hear about everything that happened the night before and I would just write it all down. She came in, a bit hefty, sounds like. Did not know that in her check they were going to ask her to lift the titties. She had a heroin and a needle taped under her heaving bosom. Lift the titties. She had a heroin and a needle. Whoa. What? Taped under her heaving bosom.

Taped? Oh, my God. Yeah. Would that be weird, like on a date? Yeah. You're like, what? Rip the bar off. What are these doing under here? All of a sudden, you're just nodding off.

God. The wife's suitcase? Yeah. So the wife's suitcase, they brought brought They don't bring the suitcase back They bring all your shit back in a laundry bag And then everything but your computer And electronics in your backpack So I had my books

Boys in the Boat, The Little Men in the Boat Good Unreal Tim Kalashow gave me that My McDowell tour of early 20th century Europe About halfway through The Guns of August. Oh, that's a great book. Yeah.

Hey, World War I. That's the World War I? Yeah, yeah. What a mess. Yeah. I think. It would have started even without the assassination. Yeah.

Right? It both would have started without the Archduke. It was a powder keg, I tell you. Also, might not have needed to happen in retrospect. Yeah. Certainly didn't need to drag out as long as it did. Yeah. So they bring you back your books. They bring me back. Butter keg, I tell you. Also, might not have needed to happen in retrospect. Yeah. Certainly didn't need to drag out as long as you did. So they bring you back your books.

They bring me back- Trench warfare. A laundry bag full of all my laundry, and I'm unpacking it, and there's a pair of my wife's underwear in there that she had left, like zipped in one of the tiny pockets from the last time she took it on a trip. So now I'm like, all right, there's a couple scenarios here. Either they think that I brought these underwear for me because occasionally I like to wear a thong or that I'm going to jerk it to my wife's underwear while I'm here. But either way, the staff member that I'm going to see for the next month, every day, he just packed this lady's thong in my...

Did you have to explain to him or you just let him think? Who knows what this guy... It was in the bag and then I just let it go. Awesome. Yeah. So the last thing I'll say about it before we move on

to something of more importance. I'm going to tell you about my roommate. There's nothing more important than your health, Jake. I'm going to tell you about my roommate, okay? Is that what you're supposed to say? I don't know. My roommate, who was my roommate. There's nothing more important than your health, Jake. I'm going to tell you about my roommate, okay? Is that what you're supposed to say? I don't know. My roommate, who was my roommate in detox, the detox room, he did need to detox.

I think when he first got there, he went to the hospital for a couple days. And then when he came back and I first went into the room, he was on everything that they would give you. And he was out like zombie. And I just thought, I don't want that. I don't want any medication. But by the next day, next day after that, he was super, super cool. He is from the Valley. I think McAllen. Okay. Like five minutes from the border. Uh, he's about five, four, extremely gay, like the most effeminate dude you've ever met and takes pride in it and he's also like

the most street smart and after seven eight years locked up the most prison smart person you could ever meet in your life like he's a bad motherfucker but he also like might give you a z-snap and he had two robes with him he acquired an iron somehow among many things he acquired and i'm gonna wait till i know he's out to tell you what all none of it illegal but stuff might weren't supposed to have he would lay out his clothes every day he would iron his clothes could never get my bed to look like his bed what do you mean oh just perfect he's a marine perfect okay and we were both really clean and that's why there's no guarantee you're keeping your roommate when you move to the two-person room and we fucking biggest hug when we found out because he was like you're clean he's like i gotta keep you bud yeah yeah and i'm like i gotta keep

you because you're hilarious and one of the most interesting people I ever met. This is him, Dan. Don't show this, but I just want you to get a feel for it. Nope. So – I hit – Oh. My finger hit the thing.

He has – he's full sleeves, face tattoos, head tattoos, dresses super snappy. Oh, there he is. he's hilarious he's a constant shit talker and uh we were like we became like best friends did you just say face tattoo yeah okay yeah yeah he uh bold statement when you're gonna do that he had a couple like i think he and he would say like prison ruined my life. Like I wasn't a criminal. I got caught up in something. What was he into? Alcohol.

Drugs, what? Okay. I think he might've been into the commerce side of drugs, but not the consumption side of drugs. And he was freaking hilarious, dude. And he was such a sweet guy. So you got his digits? Oh yeah.

You're going to remain in touch with him? A lot of people give you digits but uh we actually like each without knowing it left each other a letter when i was leaving left each other a letter yeah like he was awesome somewhat of a love letter yeah dude we literally were like we were an old gay couple that's great like i would we would take each other's laundry we'd bring each other like extra snacks from the lunchroom that we weren't supposed to have. He acquired, at first against the rules and then eventually with the rules, a radio from the pool area so he could listen to their version of Kiss FM every morning while he got ready. And he would get ready.

Eyelash curl, foundation. Stop. Yeah, for sure. That's amazing. Yeah. He was a bad bitch, as he would say. How long,

how much longer does he have? Not long. Yeah? Not long. And we, yeah, and so, another thing about him,

he really loved the Aaron Hernandez show. Ah, really? Did you watch it? Yeah, he, I can't stop watching it, but it's so bad he had read the book in prison and he's a belichick character and yeah and it's hilarious uh urban meyer but i he was like oh is that the cute one from from uh that i read the book about and i'm

like yeah that's him and so the first episode you know they're getting real into the gay stuff and i'm like man is this uncomfortable you know i, I don't know how he feels about this. And then, like, the next day, he was like, what time is Aaron Hernandez's cutie show on tonight? I'm like, it's every week, bud. He's like, well, remind me. And so for four straight weeks, we would usually fall asleep between me 815, him 845. On Tuesday nights, bud, we stayed up to watch what he called his boyfriend. If you're going to bed at 8.15, what time are you waking up?

Never in bed after 4 a.m. Whoa. I woke up at 4 o'clock on the dot to today, even though I didn't go to bed until midnight. Do you think that'll keep going for a while? I'll get back to like 5.15 pretty soon. We stopped setting the alarm because I would get up at 4 and he was always up by 4 30 to 5 god i wonder if your your rehab roommate would ever appear on here oh they he does and the guy the other guy we had from our original room does he they want to early 50s yeah he's early 50s and he had done off and on i think 13 years in years. In the clink. Yeah. Wow.

So that was my first day. I was like, holy shit, man. Yes, man. It was a little bit different. But yeah, Eddie loved the Aaron Hernandez show. That's the only night we would stay up. The first time, maybe it was the second time we watched it, he was like, hmm.

He's like, if I had met this man, he'd be paying child support. Let me ask you one thing real quick. At any point in 28 days, I guess? Yeah, I think I left at 27. Did you ever feel unsafe or have any fears? At least three times. Okay. And number two, were there ever any conflicts with other people?

With you, did you ever have any problems with any where you felt like, I think this guy might want to kick my ass? Not really. Nothing? I would say there's either zero or half of one. And the coin of the realm at the treatment facility rehab folks. Cigs? Vapes?

Anything nicotine, dude. Yeah. Anything. Lucy? Lucy? Vapes? Anything nicotine, dude. Yeah. Anything.

Lucy? There is no – I would say 90% to 95% of the people there are consistently using one, if not two, nicotine products, whether it's dip, pouches. Yeah, get yourself a Lucy, which I had. Gave them to a couple people, and they're like, whoa, this is way better. What is this? And I'm like, let me get you a promo code. Stub zone. Yeah, and so that, vapes, people who didn't smoke at all, vapes. this is way better. What is this? And I'm like, can we get you a promo code? Stub zone.

Yeah. And so that vapes, people who didn't smoke at all, vapes are, there's nobody there not, but the vape is a huge plus. Not only does I think it's probably not as bad for you. Not stinky.

When you get a 15 minute break every hour, the cigarette people have to go smoke. But I would just stay in the class and keep writing and reading and vape because there's nobody in there to tell me to stop. So every day there's probably five 15-minute smoke breaks. I just created an hour and 15 minutes. I literally became like one of those douchebags on Instagram and TikTok that's like, I'm getting three days out of every 24 hours. Here's how. That's how it was. I would eat all my meals in five minutes or less and then go on a 10 minute walk and the meals were

either an hour for breakfast and dinner or an hour and 30 for lunch. I just banked almost four hours right there or three and a half. That was the food. It's fine. The breakfast phenomenal. Yeah. Hard to screw it up. They do a huge thing of scrambled

eggs and potatoes, a meat, tortillas. It was fine. It was really good. The rest of it, you know, you'd have your hits and misses. But they're trying to get people to gain weight. Most people come in there way underweight because either they're only drinking and not eating or they're only using a drug and not eating. As I told Danny, I was kind of doing the worst of both.

I wasn't drinking enough to not make me want to eat, so I was drinking enough to get a ton of empty calories from alcohol and then still eating like a normal person or a fat ass. Whereas there was a guy in there who gained 25 pounds in 15 days and he looked normal. Are you happy you did it? I feel dead ass the best I've ever felt in my entire life in every single way. Just like Zeke.

There was a moment like two and a half weeks in, not to get all weird on you, where I looked in the mirror and I was like, son of a bitch, I'm proud of myself. Good for you. Like I actually looked in my eyes and was like, I got a little fire that I hadn't had in a while when I looked at myself. Like you got hard looking at yourself? Yeah. And I didn't even have to jack off.

I just came. Yeah. That's great. That's the goal for all of us. Yeah. No, that's the level of- To love yourself that much. That's the level of mind control I have now.

Yeah. If I just think of everything that I've accomplished, I just come. I wonder if you can make me do it, just looking at me. That's the next step. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, but I was, I terribly missed the show because this is what I love doing. I terribly missed my kids. I'm very glad I did it when they're young enough to think I was at work,

especially given that we had just been in California. We had just been in Cleveland. Yeah, in the end, they won't know. I'll eventually tell them. They'll know when I tell them. That's probably not that far off. Yeah. So anyways, yeah, the only conflict I had, Danny,

was over the case of the missing vape, which was a very long day. But once I realized that the guy who I knew had probably, I knew had taken it, was not only bipolar, but was a full-on tweaker. Good dude, but very unstable. I'm like, I probably don't want to push this issue any further. Let that one go. I can get another one eventually. You just kind of let that go. I kept my head down. That's wise

decision making that you might not have had. 100%. Were you a sloppy lush in the gutter? There's no doubt. Or even before I did this, even if I wasn't drinking, I was a very reactionary and i still have to work on that you know but i didn't complain about anything

to anybody as far as like the staff a lot of people it's their right because their insurance is paying a lot of money they wanted their voice heard every day every day so anyways i appreciate you guys. You know what? You really should. I'm fired up, dude, because I got a lot. We're the real heroes here for making it through all this without you. Watched a lot of McAfee because I had to to keep up with sports. Well, okay.

Had a lot of – See, when you were gone – That's during lunch. So I wanted to do a couple things before you got back, and I just don't get things done. But you know Mortgage Mark? Yeah, of course. They gave us this table. Wow.

This is a standing table. That's a great table. You didn't switch? It's not plugged in at all. It's not. It goes up. And so, yes, I wanted to have that table over here. When I walked in.

So you walk in. I'm standing doing the show. I'm wearing a tank top. I haven't even told him about the electrons. We don't have time for that. The grounding. And I'd be wearing moccasins. I was going to totally change my life.

Okay. Just so that everything would be different. Grounding, big topic at treatment. Grounding? Of course. Okay. I can't wait. Maybe you need to go to treatment, Dan. I can't wait. Iounding, big topic at treatment. Grounding? Of course. Okay. I can't wait. Maybe you need to go to treatment.

I can't wait. I would love to go to treatment. You would not last a day. Treatment sounds great. He wouldn't last a day. Oh, sounds like a challenge. No, you would not last. Sounds like a fantasy football league bet payoff.

Someone telling you what you have to do all the time and what you have to eat and how you got to eat it, when you got to eat it, where you got to be, there's no chance, dude. You're right. You were about to deep throat a banana. Yeah. No, you told me to stop, and I stopped.

See, I'm compliant. I think you could do it. Yeah, a lot of McAfee. I got reports on that. All right. That's going to be interesting. By the way, last thing I'll say about the roommate. Like on day four or five, be interesting. By the way, last thing I'll say about the roommate. Like on day

four or five, we were looking at the schedule and it was like, when do we have to be there? It's like 15 minutes. I was like, that's fucking gay. And? And I was like, ooh. And I looked up at him like a, you know, searing the headlight. He's gay. Yeah. And he

was like, I don't care. He's like, it's fucking gay. So he did, he agreed that it was gay. Yeah. I've heard it. I heard him use the F slur a couple of times. Are you here with Noviello in studio? No, no. You know, Noviello's gay. I do. Like he's got it on his show. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. His husband. Anyway, he was in here saying he loved the old Gay Not Gay and wants us to bring it back. Say less. If we got the co-sign from Steve Noviello, then we're good to go. Your roommate could weekly...

We'll do that. It'll be like picking games with different guests, but we'll just have a bunch of different gay panelists. I love it. We'll do the gay version of the have a bunch of different gay panelists. I love it. We'll do the gay version of the Steve Noviello show with panelists because he's always got three people in there with him. And we'll just do, we get three gay people, and then we just talk about, is this gay? Yeah.

If we did Gay Not Gay, we called it that, do we get sued by our former employer? Would they want to go to court to say, we own gay, not gay? Like, do you want to do that? I think you shoot your shot, Dan. Do you want to put that, I don't know, it's interesting. It's an interesting thought experiment.

Yeah, I don't know if you were, I was telling a story a minute ago about how going to court ruined my life and I ended up at a treatment facility a year later. So if we could... Let's not blame that. Well, let's just think about trying to avoid court, if at all possible. All right. You don't want to have any fun.

Should we shift into sports? Hell yeah, brother. Okay. Because there was a game last night. Yeah, I was just... My first question when I came in is, what do you plan on spending all those winnings on? Well, hold on.

For what? Wait. 5-0. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, no, obviously I missed that. Almost got it. We got to 1-0. They were down three touchdowns in week two.

I was like, Jesus. Oh, I forgot you missed all of that. Jesus. Well, I mean, I watched every game. You left right after the Browns game. I had to get tricky about how to watch it, sometimes including the middle of the night when it would replay, but I would at least see like the first three I watched every game. That's right. You left right after the Browns game. I had to get tricky about how to watch it, sometimes including the middle of the night when it would replay. But I would at least see the first three quarters of every game,

and then I would have to clean up the end of it. But yeah, they lose by 30. They're down by 30 in the third or fourth in all these games. I'm like, oh, Dan. I just wanted to – well, okay, we'll get to that. But I wanted to mention that – so last night we did have a live stream. We have six more live streams to go. No, wait.

Was that our first one? No, no, no, that was our second one. Yeah. Yeah, so we have six more, including this coming Sunday that you'll be on. And do I have to not drink at the live stream now? Hell no. Dude'm i'm just uh i'm just housing those you would have been uh so proud of me i i drank three whole beers last night that's a solid solid beer right there with our lights you know that's wrong with the lone star

regular the lone star state that's right the national National Beer of Texas. Anyway, but I actually didn't want to focus on Lone Star at this moment, but I was going to focus on one of the guests out there was seen, Sean, Sean Kernan from 360 Wealth Management, and he's a new sponsor as well. He's an independent guy. He says, I own my own practice. No one is the boss of me except you. He means us.

And, or like the people that, you know, will employ him. And the compliance people who could put me out of business on a whim if I joke about moosing or the Chisholm Trail. Okay? Okay. So he's a big fan. If you give him a call, 469-893-0067, or you could check out dallasfinancialplanner.net. You can see what he does. Check it out. 360 Wealth Management is what it's called.

So you go to that website and you take a look right there. Look at that. There's a picture of Sean. And I guess probably that's his family or something, or maybe just Sean ran into a bunch of people and said, would you take a picture of me? They manage money for people that don't want to worry about it. They help their clients make money, live as long in retirement as they do. And they can help you avoid making large and irreversible mistakes. They help you consider the impact of taxes and they protect against the big risks to a successful financial plan. So if you are like you

or me, probably the vast majority. Yeah. Like you need a guy like this, like Sean Kernan. So go to dallasfinancialplanner.net go to DallasFinancialPlanner.net. DallasFinancialPlanner.net. He's great. And check out that website. See a little picture. Look, there's Sean and some lady. It's probably his wife.

Yeah, I don't know. I hope so. I'm guessing so. Or maybe would Sean just put his side piece up there? Like thinking, well, my wife will never go to my website. That's a good point. That's what I would do. Yeah, it's like zig when they zag, you know?

Yeah. If you want to see a picture of Sean and his wife or some lady, dallasfinancialplanner.net. He's great. I really enjoyed the copy point of, you may have said this and I just missed it, but the do you need a third party to tell your wife or husband you're spending too much money? Oh, really? That's an extremely relatable copy point. Yeah, okay. Listen, she may not listen to you, but I could probably get it across.

Okay, that's great. Now, Cowboys. What an affair. I guess, man. Obviously, when you have a near walk-off as they say wins a win i know but this team man it's they're just so it was aggressively boring such a boring game such an ugly game even every one of the wins well beating last night too that weather delay man yeah i didn't finish it last night. Well, I wouldn't have.

I know. Were we not live streaming? In fact, I thought about heading upstairs at halftime and just leaving the live stream to everybody else. And it was boring, just like the Giants game. You know, Cleveland, obviously they put it on Cleveland, but we now know that Cleveland has the worst quarterback in the NFL. It's crazy. And their

coach is in disarray or the team is in disarray, their relationship with the coach. Yeah. That's the only time they look legit. You know, they're apparently a pretty decidedly average team when healthy. And then when they're not, they're

below average. And I think the Steelers are just okay. They were 3-1, but I wouldn't think they were anything special. No, probably a bubble playoff team, and that's probably where the Cowboys actually are. We had thoughts in our mind going into the season that they were more than that. Although you kind of look across the NFC, no one's really jumping out. I mean, well, Minnesota's obviously jumping out. Yeah, but the problem is if you wanted to make a case for another one,

that one is in your division and has been a damn sleeping giant. Maybe that's not even the way to put it for 20 years now outside of a brief RG3 period. Yeah, their defense is – They're a freaking new owner. They got DQ. They got Cliff. And now they have a dude that I would be shocked if he's not an all-pro.

First or second team perennial by the end of two years from now. Maybe this year. Jaden Daniels? Yeah. I mean, you don't put those type of performances up and then just suddenly suck. Well, don't you think of RG3 and his body type and wonder can he survive? He looks small.

He looks slight. He does. I'm interested to see how he does when Cliff gets another head coaching job and a different coordinator gets in there. Because I think he's made perfectly for Cliff's system. They've also helped him out a little bit. Kyler's best year was with Cliff. That's true. But they went and got Eckler.

They've got McLaurin. Hell, they may go get Devontae Adams. That would suck. Yeah, it would suck. The division is getting better. Don't you think the Cowboys should be after Devontae Adams? Without a doubt. If they're talking about a second plus extra compensation, I would make that call, get it done

today. You're not going to be able to run the ball like you did last night, but what, maybe three other times this year. And it's not like they went nuts last night running the ball. No, it just wasn't god-awful. You know? Basically, the one thing I want to say before we get into the game specifically is

almost everything we talked about in the off season is, is being laid bare for all to see. You can't start to rookie offensive linemen and just completely ignore running back. As we've joked about before, we're,

you know, the whole running backs don't matter thing as a hyperbole. It's really just don't spend too much on it. And they were like, what if we did nothing? Right. Running backs don't matter as much as the Cowboys had been treating them as mattering. And they might matter more when you have two rookie offensive linemen.

So you're going to go with bringing no running back. Well, I mean, we've been talking about Derrick Henry. Yeah, of course. Obviously, you probably saw him against the Cowboys, but I don't know if you've seen him elsewhere, but he's been going nuts. Yeah, I mean, the run yesterday to set up the field goal, the first couple weeks were a little figure-out-ish, you know? But you knew they would.

Which seems like the whole NFL, it must be because of lack of preseason, but the first few weeks are figure-out-ish, like you say, and now we're kind of seeing where everybody is slotting in. We're trying to figure out where do the Cowboys slot in, and I think they do slot in just like an average team. Well, I think with the extra game and the extra playoff team, you don't need to be gung-ho ready for week one. I think you need to be playing your best football towards the end.

For sure. But how are they going to do that if it's a war of attrition and injuries are piling up and you're lucky that you have some of these injuries now perhaps? But it doesn't mean that Demarcus Lawrence won't be injured again at the end of the year. No, you're right. I'm saying for good teams like Baltimoreimore who should compete for a conference championship yeah they started out yeah they're fine now i mean to be honest with you the bingles at one and four are not a bad team they may be an average team but they're not a bad team they could easily reel off four straight against bad offenses and be five and five yeah because they're about to

hit their fourth place schedule i think yeah Because they've already played the Chiefs and Ravens. Yeah. And you look at what the Cowboys have coming up. Yeah. There's not a game here outside of Carolina where I could guarantee you that they'll be favored. No, we asked the other day, which of the next five or six games are the Cowboys' favorite?

Well, I know ESPN put their egghead nerds on it because I had to watch Get Up for 15 minutes every morning to stay up with sports. And they were sub 50% in every single one of them. I guess the good thing about being in rehab and having to just watch ESPN is they do cover the

they treat the Cowboys as if they're located in Dallas. Every day. Yeah. They lead with it every day. So that keeps you in the know. It's annoying the way they. Every day. Yeah. They lead with it every day. So that keeps you in the know. It's annoying the way they talk about it. On what's going on with the Cowboys. Yeah, for sure. But when you say they're not going to face very many other teams,

they're going to be able to run like that, that is implying the Cowboys had this great rushing night. And they did. They rushed for 109 yards. Yeah. Rico Dowdle, even though we're watching him thinking, whoa, this is amazing. Rico Dowdle is doing this.

He had 87 yards. Yeah, it was three and a half a carry. On 20 carries. So they didn't really have a great rushing night. Well, part of the reason they don't have a great rushing night is because they have the worst running back in the league who gets regular carries on their team. Would you say that's Zeke or Rico?

No, no, no. Lipke? No. Deuce Vaughn? Deuce. They were trying to force Deuce down our throats for a few weeks. Yeah, that's true. Until yesterday, they're like, you know what?

We're done. He's not even active yesterday.. Yeah, that's true. Until yesterday, they're like, you know what? We're done. He's not even active yesterday. Last week it was CD. I'm going to try and make him the running back? Yeah. Zeke is so washed, man. It's not even... Did you like the play where

they threw him a pass and he ducked? That was pretty sweet. That was pretty sweet. That was pretty sweet. What were the announcers saying about that? I don't recall. Okay. Do you? Because we weren't able to hear.

It was like a swing pass, right? No. It was kind of a panic. Right across the middle. Oh, okay. It looked like a little option thing. He was kind of crossing with another receiver and he ducked. Yeah.

Oh, my gosh. That could almost hit me in numbers. I've got to get out of the way. I think Zeke was thinking Dak was throwing that to Ferguson, and he needed to get out of his way. Yeah, that's usually what that is. But he fell well short of his tight end. That's usually what it is.

If you remember on that play, that was the one where they rushed to the line. Yeah. To try to save some time. Maybe they thought that the previous play was going to be reviewed or to catch them off guard. And Zeke ran in at the last minute and had no idea what was going on and had to go up to Dak and talk to him. And that's what happened.

That was the play. They rushed to execute that play, and it completely fell apart. Yeah. They did that twice. They did. One of them was the intentional grounding. Yep. Yeah. Where it's like, third and one and they go, hurry up.

Maybe they thought there was a review, I guess. But on the replay, it looked like they had the catch and then he just air mailed one and got an intentional grounding. So, that's cool. Or you're trying to catch them not being able to sub. But then, I mean, my goodness, you just throw it away.

You get fourth and one. You probably go for it. Intentional grounding is the worst that could happen. Yeah, I mean, I guess to your point, if you wanted this genius move of not letting them sub and the best you could do is throw it to a guy in the stands, then I'm not sure that not having a sub was that important. Right.

I'd rather just call a good play. Well, Dowdle took himself out of the game, and Zeke ran in. Number one, they were hurrying up. Dowdle pointed to himself and exited the game for I don't know why. Maybe he was tired from the previous play. Zeke's running in and has no idea what's going on, and that's when that play went down. Yeah, they're a boring

average team and then without... Like, that's what the Steelers are. Yeah. The Steelers are a boring, grinded out, average team who kind of figures enough things out to barely be over 500 or 500 every year and then get bounced in the playoffs.

That's what it feels like to be the majority of NFL teams, man. That's what you're looking at with the Cowboys right now. Yeah. And, I mean, I guess it is Justin Fields, and he had a couple of pretty poor throws last night, a couple of solid ones. But I feel like with him they just have –

they do at least have some big play potential. With Justin Fields? Yeah. Just his legs? His legs. He gets outside the pocket. And by the way, we were talking Jaden Daniels. It's pretty obvious that every team with a quarterback that runs

knows that when they really need it, they can do it twice in a row and get a first down, right? I mean, that was even Dimes, Danny Dimes, I feel like. Yeah, he had a great game yesterday. Yeah, but I just mean Jaden Daniels is going to be, he feels like baby Lamar to me, but a little bit smaller. And the Cowboys are clearly incapable of stopping that. To the Steelers' offense, I would still take Dallas's,

but they seem vaguely more exciting. The Steelers offense, I would still take Dallas's, but they seem vaguely more exciting. Dallas is throwing it to freaking Brian Bruce Spann or whatever for four or five yards. Spann Ford. Spann Ford is their bread and butter. Just boring, you know? The whole offense is bland.

You look at all these other teams and their motion rates. And I wrote down after week one, is Mike Shanahan the grandfather of all modern NFL offense? Because all those guys came through his system. All of them now. The Cowboys just

don't look anything like that. Lack of motion. They don't have a second wide receiver, although Turpin might be an upgrade over Cooks with Cooks being out. But neither one of them are. That's tough, yeah. Look around the league and find other wide receiver twos and think about where the Cowboys rank.

Look at the Texans who they're about to see. Nico Collins is their two. The Bengals, T. Higgins. Tank Dell is their three. Yeah. Nico Collins might is their three. Yeah. Nico Collins might be their one. But they have a lot of deficiencies,

and their quarterback is good but not good enough to do it on his own. And when they go 9-8 or 8-9, they will blame everything on him. Despite two rookie offensive linemen, despite not signing a running back. Well, that's what you get when you're the highest-paid quarterback in NFL history. You're going to have to elevate these guys. Yeah. Yeah, you've got to make those around you better. And I guess that's the tradeoff, you know, if you did want to actually give some kind of a hometown discount,

where that's not on DAC. It's not on DAC to do that. But, I mean, you do talk about Tom Brady, and he was never the highest-paid quarterback in the NFL. In fact, he was always millions under that per year. It's a bit of an anomaly because nobody else really has done that. Yeah. But I know what you mean.

And you know why Dak doesn't do and you know why dac doesn't do it is because he doesn't trust jerry and steven and he shouldn't because they lied at the players they lied all the players about oh well we only have so much we can spend we you know even jerry saying after uh henry the baltimore game that we we couldn't have afforded Derrick Henry. Well, yeah, you could have had you signed Dak and CD to the contracts that you ended up signing them for. That's what they were asking for back then. So you could have signed them in the spring. You would have moved money around and you would have had a lot more cap room. But he's right in the sense that they couldn't sign Derrick Henry at that time

because they didn't have these other deals done, and Dak was going to count, whatever, $50 million towards the cap this year. Now he doesn't. Yeah, no, the whole thing was sequenced as poorly as some of their play-calling sequences are. We're like, what if he did that first? Yeah. Then wouldn't that have made the later thing easier?

And go back to when Dak was drafted, he was clearly not their first or second choice. And then every time. Keep going. Every time he's come up for negotiations, it's been pulling teeth. So why the hell should he help the Cowboys? Yeah. They made that trade for Trey Lance.

I firmly believe they've made that trade partly with the thought of maybe this guy will just take over for Dak and we're going to let Dak walk. And at the very worst, we're at least going to show Dak that we're not all on board with him and you might want to sign. And none of it worked. And now he's worthless. The fact that he can't beat out Cooper Rush in two years makes his trade value zero. Everybody's saying, oh, Miami, you should trade into Miami because Tua and they got no backups. Why would Miami give you anything? Yeah.

You know that he'll get cut at the end of this year. Why would they give anything to Trey Lance? See, that's why, and this never works out. I don't know why, other than I grew up a huge Cordell Stewart fan. But I can sell myself every season on

about a little sub package for the running quarterback. A little Trey Lance inside the 10. That makes a lot of sense. Nobody ever actually does it, or they do it in such a way that they never actually commit to it. They do it three a year but you saw him in training camp right that's what i'm saying he made some of the most exciting plays they had and pre-season yeah and games training camp and that's what i mean yeah uh but even in training camp there were a couple plays

you would make and you're like that's the fastest guy on the team yeah i guess tasem hill's the only other tasem hill but he has other value. He plays regular snaps. Right. That's the thing. And many Saints fans are tired of the Taysom Hill. If you're going to suit up Deuce Vaughn for a few weeks, you could suit up Trey Lance. Especially if you're going to give up a pick and guarantee his salary for the full year. Disaster.

There's no way that Rico Dowdle and Zeke. Suit him up as the backup quarterback. Yeah. Let him return kicks. Why him up as the backup quarterback. Yeah. Let him return kicks. Why not? Let him return, yeah. I mean, he would do it, but in a perfect world. A little throwback or something.

Spice this thing up. Yeah, and then you've got, obviously, no Parsons, no Neyland, or excuse me, no Lawrence, then you lose Neyland. And then, you know, even the first four weeks, it's not like they were getting a ton of pressure. They were getting just absolutely swallowed by other offensive lines. Well, they were losing. That's true, too, yeah.

And that is the biggest thing. And I know Blake's pointed that out forever, is that if they can't get a lead, the whole thing gets out of whack because now you can't go, you know, NASCAR mode and put five pass rushers out there. It's really interesting how much the Cowboys represent the change in the, I don't think the word really is circular. I think it's more like evolution of the NFL.

And we'd seen this coming. Everybody started equipping their defenses to play essentially spread offenses. And I remember watching a game a few years ago. I think it was Arkansas A&M at the Death Star. And A&M was under Kevin Sumlin. And they were playing all these SEC teams that ran the spread. Alabama wasn't there yet. And then Arkansas still ran the ball as one of the few SEC teams did, the Aggies could do nothing about it because they had geared their offense to have five, six defensive backs on the field and have to cover slot receivers. And then Arkansas would line up with two tight ends or one tight end

and a fullback and just hammer the shit out of them. And it's like the guy trying to tackle them weighs 200 pounds instead of 240. And you see that in the NFL now is that everybody's like, we've got to rush the passer and defend the pass. And play two safeties back. Play two safeties. Give nothing up. So the Cowboys are always kind of lagging behind what's going on?

Of course. Newsflash. Yeah, it's crazy. Because now they have to catch up to it and realize. On both sides of the ball. Now the NFL is like, maybe we could try to get ahead of this. And by the time they reconfigure everything, the NFL is like, maybe we could try to get ahead of this. And by the time they reconfigure everything,

the NFL will have gone the other way. Yeah, now everyone is motion and wide zone runs, and the Cowboys are still trying to play with two tight ends, which was a decade ago. Yeah, behind the eight ball again. That sucks. But who knows? I mean, maybe they get healthy, and like Dan said, the NFC is not exactly a juggernaut, top-heavy situation right now.

No, I still think they'll make the playoffs. And, yeah, you've got other teams have problems too. Other teams? But that doesn't make – and you know I've long liked to say I like to look at other people with problems to make me feel better about my own situation. Hoping I did a little bit of that for you yeah sure yeah I'm not in rehab honey he's been on cloud nine my wife's complaining to me about this or that I'm like I could be in rehab what what would you think of that in this case yeah but then you'd be gone for four weeks you

might like that no she likes him it's him that would want to. Oh, wow, look at that. Yeah, William Pace. Have you guys been vibing lately? No. That was a random? He's, yeah, he's. It'd be a 45-minute call if I was to answer that call. Yes, other teams are also.

Oh, yeah, yeah. San Francisco lost yesterday. They have an excuse. They're now 2-3. They do have some pretty hardcore injuries. Yeah. I want to talk a little bit more about Dak, though. Just because, again, his numbers look good, and he won the game.

So in the end, that's what you want. Quarterbacks always get the wins or losses. And he did pass for 352 yards in bad weather conditions. So you're like, oh, okay. But he did not have a good game. No. Like, kind of had a terrible game. What was the situation with CeeDee Lamb and him when,

was it his second interception or his first one? The first one, I believe. And then CeeDee was, like, kind of barking at him coming off the field. Left corner of the end zone. That was arguably the worst interception of his career. Double cover. Like, I don't know what he was thinking. He obviously, they showed the replay.

He dropped back and stared him down. No pressure. Double cover. Like, I don't know what he was thinking. He obviously, they showed the replay. He dropped back and stared him down. No pressure. No pressure. He knew exactly where he was going to throw, and why would he throw over there? It was so covered. And weren't they on the 15? Yeah, they were in the red zone.

Yeah. Yeah, how many red zone problems? I mean, they got so lucky at the end there. I'll tell you what. Everybody in the den, we we were so so dying to not have overtime because it was already 90 minutes delayed oh yeah and you know people got a long drive home and it's you guys are heroes purple heart for that one after midnight and i haven't seen after midnight in the longest time.

And, you know, I'm three beers deep. Oh, yeah. Three beers and a Lucy. Blackout. Oh, my gosh, yeah, I popped a few of those Lucys in. Yeah, I was second and five to 15, that pick. Wait, real quick. Talk about lucky.

Dak on that first and goal run on the last drive, he tried to stretch the ball out. Right, and first we were crediting him for not doing it. Yeah, that he did not fumble that into the end zone. But he was going to do a Derek Carr. Was it Derek Carr a few years ago did that against the Cowboys? Yeah, Jeff Heath. Yeah, trying to reach over the goal line

and end up fumbling it through the end zone, and then you give them the ball and all that. That almost happened he had a pretty uneven night the strip sack fumble you know obviously it's counted as a DAC turnover but also they were it off and on getting freaking manhandled by the Steelers front I mean Terrence Steele can't play. We might have gotten in over our skis on our boy Terrence Steele's plus starter. Because it's a crazy story. He didn't play that much. It wasn't on anybody's draft board. Goes undrafted.

Didn't have a great combiner. Maybe it was senior bowl or something. It's like, man, Texas Tech made good. And then they started him right away and were like, are you sure about that? And he did okay and he got a contract but now it's not looking great. Yeah, we noticed before the game they'll throw the PFF grades

up and it's all just 30 out of 36, 70 out of 100. And Zach Martin. Yeah, Zach Martin's good. There's one other. Maybe Ferguson is good but outside of that. Guyton? Yeah. Not good. There's one other. Maybe Ferguson is good, but outside of that. Guyton, not good. He had a tough night, which ultimately means he left the game, right?

Yeah, which I think you nailed. Tyler Smith, I think, I don't know, made them think that they were better at drafting offensive linemen than they are. They've been pretty good at it. They've been pretty good at it. But Tyler Smith was able to play right away. And so then they thought, okay, well, we'll just draft two offensive linemen

and start them right away because we're really good at this. The other thing, too, is which one was it? Oh, yeah, they were saved by a hold. It was right before the end of the third quarter. And maybe the reason you're holding the ball is because there was a hold. So sometimes it's frustrating if you just look at the quarterback and you're like, why didn't you get rid of the ball? And then they go holding, and you're like, maybe that was why.

Oh, and Dak fell down. But on third and seven from the 38, yeah, it's like, you're already in Aubrey's range. So do we really need to take a sack here? Now, they got saved by it, and he had the nice find of Dowdle to score on that drive. But I feel like he is in the mindset that he has to kind of hero ball out. Yeah.

And he might be right. The problem is that's just a very risk-reward, high-variance type way to approach offense, you know? Especially when your weapons are as limited as his are. Yeah. God, man, if they just – that's why I'm ready to, as Charlie would say, you know, cut the brakes, wild card bitches, just go get Devontae Adams and become a team that throws the ball 50 times a game every game.

I agree. Just do it. Yes. You know Jerry's, like, itching to do it. People are like, oh, this team – they are still talking about him, but they're boring. Yes. You know Jerry's itching to do it. People are like, oh, this team. They are still talking about him, but they're boring. And there's a lot of other NFL teams that are getting pretty excited right now, in big markets no less.

If they would just do it, scratch the itch, give them a second, screw it, McCarthy's probably gone, and if they don't make the playoffs or progress anyways, you'll figure out the cap number because you're going to restructure Dak next year anyways. You're going to have to with him and CD just to keep Parsons. So just go fuck it mode. You know what? That's what they call it. That's what they call it in treatment. You need to be very aware of fuck it mode. No, no, really. I'm saying it's fuck it mode time. They got to do it. It's funny you're saying all this after a win. Yeah, but you do the Giants game and then this.

You look at it and you're just like, this is not the same team. You're not beating Detroit with that last night. Detroit coming off a bye? I don't like the chances. Real quick, we didn't mention this, but some people were thinking CD was yelling at Dak on the sideline after the interception. I have the audio. I mean mean obviously not the audio of cd but them trying to talk about it well lip readers i mean they figured out what he was saying jump ball yeah yeah it was not a blow up on the

sideline at all there's a couple i think it's a little open to interpretation and i agree that that he's saying jump ball for, jump ball, I got you. That's what it really looks like. Other people have been saying they went and ran it by another lip reader that said it could be something that was a little less, I don't know, benign. It's in that article that I sent you. Let me pull it up. The one that I saw was subpar tonight.

Yeah, subpar tonight. It doesn't look like he's saying that To me when you have that in your head I don't think that sounds like something CeeDee Lamb would say I'm sorry If you match it up with his mouth You're like oh I can see that

And then I think about hearing CeeDee Lamb Talk before And I just don't think he's saying that Subpar tonight. How do you do? Maybe mid, bro. Yeah, yeah. Let's hear what Collinsworth said about it.

Okay, yeah. So there's a couple funny parts of this here. So the last time out there, Dallas had the interception, right? With Dak Prescott in the direction of CeeDee Lamb. Hard to explain. Just thrown into coverage and something's wrong. CeeDee Lamb at the direction of C.D. Lamb. Hard to explain. Just thrown into coverage and something's wrong. C.D. Lamb at the end of that. I'll let you read your own lips.

At Dak, Dak doesn't react at all. Doesn't look good. Not a bit. Not a bit. Read your own lips is obviously a weird misspeak. Maybe read C.D.'s lips for yourself. Read his lips for yourself. Not read your own lips

and then but so the jump ball four thing you would think that dac would look up at him kind of shake and give him the he would give him the fist he'd fist him a little fist bump he was looking at his ipad yeah and the camera stayed on him and he did not his head at the end of it yeah like i i hear you, man. He didn't, he didn't make eye contact, but you know, he's multitasking too. And yeah,

I mean, I was gone during the CD mini meltdown that we had on in week. Was it two or three? Pouting CD. Yeah. Yeah. And then, you know what happened next game?

They gave him the ball like 20 times. We so predicted it, man. I mean, the T the T O special. Yeah. That's where we should be putting our gambling money. They gave him the ball like 20 times. We so predicted it, man. The T.O. special. Yeah, that's where we should be putting our gambling money, like on CD over-unders. 20 targets. Yeah, it doesn't even have to be CD.

I mean, if you did this throughout the year and you just did whatever the media. It's whatever media thing goes up on a Tuesday. Yeah, go for it. By Sunday, we're going to take care of it, and we will address what the media has talked about. I wanted to get into more game audio, if we have it, and game audio today is going to be brought to us by OwnWell. Ooh.

That is the place that can get you the reduction on property taxes. It is October, And I'll bet, I don't know if you've seen it yet, Jake, since you've got back, but you're back now. Now you've got to deal with stuff like in the real world. Like property tax bills. That's right. And every time you open one of those, you're like,

no way. There's no way. And then they're like, yeah, way. You just pay it. Because it's the government. I mean, I guess you could fight it on a bigger level and write your congressman and all that kind of stuff. Hey, that sounds fun. Well, that's going to take a long time. You know it's going to take you like five minutes? Go into ownwell.com and you sign up.

And what you do is they'll work on reducing your property taxes. And they will only get paid if they get you money back. So if they look into it and they can't get you your property tax reduced, you pay them nothing except that five minutes that you spent. Yeah, nothing to lose there. But if they get you $1,000 back, they take a very small percentage. In fact, it's the smallest on the market. There are other guys who say they do this, but OwnWell will do it right and they'll take the smallest amount

on the market. 25%. Yeah. And I spent the time, I wrote out a handwritten letter. I did the whole thing trying to fight my property taxes. Didn't work. But in five minutes, OwnWell saved me a little chunk of change. That means you are part of the 86% of customers that receive a reduction. I was. In Dallas alone, average savings of $420. Whoa. Ownwell.com. They actually have a special website just for us.

Ownwell.com slash partners slash the dumb zone. And we'll put that up on our promo code page as well. Yes, sir. I don't know if I did that yet on dumbzone.com, but ownwell.com slash partners slash the dumb zone. And I see what these government agencies are trying to do. It's October. You want to watch

ball on the weekend. Arguably the best month in the calendar. So you're just going to screw them up during that. They figure you're just not going to pay attention. We'll hit them while they're looking the other way. Let Ownwell handle it. You can trust them. Ownwell.com Oh, you know what? Actually, before

more audio, did you see the last thing of the game? I guess not. When the Cowboys recovered it was a jordan lewis that kind of recovered the yeah they're doing the stanford play the pitching and all that kind of stuff was it uh george pickens yeah so jordan lewis recovers it he's celebrating he goes and uh kind of puts his chest and then his face right into George Pickens' face, like taunting. If that was done during the course of play,

he would have been flagged for taunting. So George Pickens thought, well, I'll do something that could be flagged if it was done during the course of play. He just reached up, grabbed his face mask, and yanked him down. And then his momentum, you know, Jordan Lewis' momentum, you know, he was running, and he just fell right down and then his momentum you know jordan lewis's momentum you know he was running and he just fell right it's really funny it is very funny but it's funny also just to see internet react to that yeah and then there was uh did you see jordan lewis in the tunnel uh yeah they had a lot of tunnel shots yeah what was he doing there just yelling talking

trash on pickens oh that's not playing through here is it iens. Oh, that's not playing through here, is it? I don't know why that's not playing. Change your output. That's okay. He just is the Pittsburgh need a new receiver. George Pickens weak. Yeah, George Pickens weak. And I believe, you know, if we were to rank our favorite Cowboys right now,

after Obbs, you don't got to go too far to get to jay lou i love jordan lewis man yeah he's he's our guy overshown's beast and two yeah that's work that's one of the few bright spots they have right now is it after the medical red shirt year that guy looks like he did in college where he was a kind of a player without position but he was a badass at texas he looks like he wants to be involved yeah like he's one of the few guys when i watch the cowboys that's a good way to put it looks like he really likes being there he's a nice guy too he was very kind to us remember training camp i do he was awesome we were going to play this last week but they he made a couple really good tackles against the Giants, and he was like, man, I went up against B. John Robinson every day in practice.

I got this. And I thought, yeah, that's true. One of the best running backs every day at Texas. He does have good tackling fundamentals. He's a linebacker. Pretty rare. There's not that many of them left. I mean, he's a little smaller than maybe your linebacker of 15 years ago,

but he truly plays like a linebacker, not a safety playing linebacker or an edge they make play linebacker, not a safety plan linebacker or an edge. They make play linebacker. Let's see other audio. Don't do it now. You want to do it after a break? How about we do it after a break? Okay,

cool. Yeah. So if you're watching on YouTube, we'll break for a few minutes here. And if you're listening later, then you're probably going to hear us back here in 30 seconds or so. The Dumb Zone. You're listening to The Dumb Zone. Man, what a sensitive guy Rob is.

Can't get on Rob. Can't have a little fun. I'm sorry, Rob. People are working on minimal sleep after last night, so expect testes. Or testiness. Rob is like, that's what I say right before. Hey, expect some testes. What?

What does that mean? Rob is like the MVP of every Sunday night because he gets there so early. That's your warm-up sex talk? Expect testes. What? That's supposed to turn me on? Weirdo. Hey, I made you guys a song.

You made us a song while you were in rehab? In the car on the way over here today. All right. The car, by the way, which was provided by dmw elite rides um i don't even think dan knows this song but uh danny does so it was in my head because i was thinking about rob and his drops over there a little amy whitehouse there's more but really it's the beginning okay okay anyways hey let me tell you quickly before we do audio about Prosper Ford.

It's in Prosper. You know Chaz Gilmore. Oh, I know Chaz Gilmore. You've bought a vehicle from Chaz Gilmore. I have. I was so happy to get back to it. I bought four from Chaz over the years. But Prosper Ford is their newest and you might say bestest

building. Built Ford proud. Gorgeous showroom. Stately Arts Service Department. It is in Prosper. 380 and the tollway. It's also at prosperford.com. Chaz, I don't know.

This might not be important to you. Maybe you just want to save every cent, which I think you will at Prosper Ford as well. I think they'll match or beat any deal out there, but he's just a good dude. Ask people who don't know anything about you or your association with Chaz that you know him from here and just ask what do they think about Chaz Gilmore. He's awesome, and we like to work with good dudes. We like to work with good people. He's wonderful to work with all these years, and you can go check out prosperford.com.

It's beautiful. Big savings. Save big on your next car. Fair trade-in value. Fast trade-in value as well. So check out prosperford and prosperford.com. Man, you know, there's a term in sociology for this, I'm pretty sure,

or psychology rather, where like when your girlfriend would break up with you in high school and then you would see her make, model, and color of car everywhere. Yeah. That's how I felt kind of about my Chaz Gilmore Ford Explorer. Then you start noticing. Well, it was that plus. Like you notice the Prosper Ford or the Grapevine Ford tags on them.

Well, yeah. And I think for me also the white Explorer is almost like the fleet vehicle of the day. So if you have- Of ZFW. Of like a city water department or a treatment facility. So every car there, I'm like, my car. Maybe I'm not. No.

It wasn't your car. It was not my car. Not my car. Audio? Is that what we're doing now? Yes. Yeah, I got a little bit more for you here. This one, Danny was on most of this.

How'd you guys like Collinsworth? I thought he was clean, man. Was he good? Yeah. I thought him and Tirico were actually pretty clean. I felt I listened with a very scrutinous ear, and I was just kind of like, man, am I missing stuff? I'll tell you this. He wasn't that bad. i'll tell you this he wasn't that bad i'll

tell you this uh he and al had more fun yeah he's not bad i like collinsworth a lot i this guy i love him he's announcing he's done the slide and he used to do a slide and he doesn't do it anymore because he doesn't respect his new partner he's like who's this clown i've been here that's a real thing like torico um is obviously a venerable broadcaster but alan him would kind of dick around a lot more you know what i mean yeah torico has to play it straight because i mean he didn't do this to me last night he's a haircut i was getting in my car during the game at halftime um go pick up some milk. And I saw Mike Tirico on my street. He did not jump in my car and try to finger me. That's good because he did that to someone else.

He did. He did at an ESPN party. So he's got to play it safe now. You know, a little room for error when you're the jump in the car and try to finger somebody guy. It's not as fun as it was with Al. And it sucks so bad too, because Al and, uh, Herbie remained the worst crew in America. It's such a beating. It's such a beating. And it's so

obvious that I'm sitting here watching game day. That's, you know, hell this week they were, they went live from Berkeley at what? 6am for game day. Then he's got to call a game, and then I have to expect to believe that he's prepared for an NFL game on Thursday. He's clearly not. Did you see him do the Cowboy game? Yeah. We covered that where he referred to half of their players by their numbers. Yeah.

Hey, how about – okay, you only saw the Cleveland game with us. Brady's actually pretty good. Yeah, he is. Yeah, he with us. Brady's actually pretty good. Yeah, he is. Yeah, he got good. Begrudgingly. By week three, he's as good as anybody at that job. Yeah. It's unfortunate because I root for, you know, of course he's not going to fail.

He's a great baseball player. Right, he's hot. He's perfect at everything. But this is kind of a funny uh collinsworth moment they're trying this this is what i would call trying to have chemistry you explain that uh c-gap deal there with tj over there yeah so the c-gap is just this gap right here there's nobody there right here and here and a lot of times people go well of course i'm gonna be able to run in that gap well then TJ Watt in this particular case in this play he loops down inside he has it come so there you go see get C and TJ that's it well this is the hometown of

the late great Fred Rogers mr. Rogers neighborhood so you know the simplest seeing TJ we got it it's to the. There's a lot of things in football that are so simple you can't believe. You can be like A, B, C. Drop a one, two, three, four. Yeah, we got it. So the Stretch Armstrong play that Mike fingered a lady in a car forcibly to Rico is trying to make is that because they're talking about T, J, Watt, T and J are letters, and they're talking about the C gap.

C is also a letter. Last time I checked. That he's going to somehow worm in or, excuse me, like work in that Mr. Rogers is from Pittsburgh. Doesn't really make a whole lot of sense. No, I'm still not getting it even when you explain it like that. It's an educational show. Because there were letters involved. where they would teach you letters

and they would teach you numbers on Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood in addition to how to be a kind person. Which is not even what Mr. Rogers was really about. No, but. Yeah, that was more Sesame Street teaching letters and everything. But, yeah. One. The whole.

It sounded like Collinsworth. You know what? I'm going to try and support my partner here. That's why I want to wind this back a little bit because the way I hear it, the second he brings up Mr. Rogers, Collinsworth goes, what? Yeah, he says, what's that? In this play, he loops down inside. He has it covered.

So there you go. C-gap, you love it? C and T-jab. That's it. Line 11. This is the hometown of the late great Fred Rogers Mr. Rogers neighborhood What's that? What the fuck are you talking about?

What? I just explained the C-gap to you For time purposes When he brings up The Mr. Rogers point An entire play happened So a play happened And Tirico revisits it like 45 seconds later that's why

collinsworth goes what's that he had mr he had mr rogers written down on letters mr rogers on a post-it note that was next to his uh his call sheet or his uh spotting board whatever he's like this might be the best shot i get we're talking talking letters. I've got to bring up Fred Rogers now. Jeez. Yeah, Danny cut this part down. Just Collinsworth disinterested. Can you explain that C-gap deal there with TJ over there? Yeah.

So. He didn't want to. Yeah. A little quick Tomlin here from halftime. By the way, is he complete Teflon? Mike Tomlin? He kind of lived through the closest he's come to the hot seat a couple years ago, right? Yeah, you just keep kind of being at least average no matter what they put around you.

Yeah, I like Tomlin. I don't know that I'd want him coaching the Cowboys. What quarterback did they draft that failed? Was it just Rudolph? Pickett. Kenny Pickett, that's right. Tiny hand, Kenny Pickett. Yeah.

That was the first round, right? First or second, but Pittsburgh kid. Yeah, that's right. You know, didn't play in his bowl game. I'm not saying, but I'm saying. Huh? He also- If he cared about ball, then's right. You know, didn't play in his bowl game. I'm not saying, but I'm saying. Huh? He also – If he cared about balls, then –

Yeah. He was also the one that got the fake slide outlawed. That was pretty badass. He pulled it off perfectly. Fake slide was a seminal moment of that college football season. Here's Tomlin at halftime with kind of a – Real quick, Pickett was the first quarterback off the board. There you go. I remember him being like a big deal, it was the first quarterback off the board.

I remember him being a big deal, and then everybody came out and they were like, his hands. Tallman has a bit of a dirty sound here. Mike, another slow start on offense. How do you get it going in the second half? We've got to stop kicking our own butt. No disrespect to the Cowboys, but one of those drives got stalled by two pre-snap penalties. We had a fumble that killed us in terms of field positioning in another series, and so if we stop kicking our own butt, we can start focusing on theirs. We need to focus on the Cowboys' butt.

I think it would have been better to say we can start kicking theirs. Yeah. You wouldn't like him here? I don't know. Because he's boring. Yeah. You wouldn't like him here? I don't know. Because he's boring? Yeah, he's just, I think he wants to grind it out. Yeah, but we were talking about this. I want young offensive innovator.

I want somebody that's going to see what they got here and what can I do with it. I want someone to see Trey Lance and go, okay, what could I do with this? Can I do something? I've got a talent. How can I work that in? Yeah, but he might say, Trey Lance and go, okay, what could I do with this? Can I do something? I've got a talent. How can I work that in? Yeah, but he might say, Trey Lance, you suck. You're off the team. But here's the thing.

A team that's coached by Mike Tomlin, which is why he could never coach here, would never trade a pick and $5 million for Trey Lance. It would never happen. So that's part of it, too. You can't talk about situations where the Cowboys would have a coach who could speak up because it would never happen. By the way, I will tell you, um, you know, people will tell you like, Hey, if you share your story about whatever you're going through, maybe it can help somebody else. And I've always been kind of like, I don't know,

that seems weird. Um, but I did think about, Hey, I can do this every time I saw Mike McDaniel on the sideline. I'm like, hey, this guy did it. I think Thomas Dimitrov made him because they were finding – he was living at the facility and they were finding his bottles everywhere. Mike McDaniel. He can do it. I never found one of your bottles. That's right.

I cleaned them all out. Thank you, bud. Yep. Tariqo loved this story. But did you know Western PA has also given us some great coaches like Ditka? Look at all the wins from Marvin Lewis, Bill Cowher, who did it in these parts, Mike McCarthy, and then Chuck Knox and Marty Schottenheimer, among the coaches from this Western Pennsylvania area.

Yeah, and a lot of different ethnic neighborhoods, and it created this naturally competitive environment. And I think that's what you saw out of all those quarterbacks and those coaches. You know, you're used to just going out and going, all right, let's go to work here. I'm going to read between the lines here and say that people from western Pennsylvania got really good at football and coaching because they were

so racist they couldn't handle losing to a... They got the Mexican part. They hate the black part. I am not about to give up 150 on the ground to the Jewish community. That created the... I will work day and night for a scheme to keep these drunk Irish

kids from running all over my boys. The Protestants or the Catholics. That sounds to me like Tirico was so excited about that package focusing on Western Pennsylvania players and coaches and handed it off to Collinsworth for comment, who really didn't give a shit. No, no, he didn't. Hey, you know, a lot of ethnic neighborhoods,

and you just got to go. Hey, here's a place in the country where it's pretty racist. I'll be the last thing I do is lose to a bunch of black kids. We created football here in the white north. Right. Wow. Here's orgasmic Tirico. All those black and gold uniforms.

Landon Roberts over there as well let's see i think it's a landon roberts who's going to take a running start oh what a play and just time it perfectly oh wow that's unbelievable the odds of actually making contact on that play, flying through the air, is so remote. Look where he started, Chris. We saw this a little bit in practice. This guy gets put in on the goal line to run and dive kamikaze style and hit that ball on the butt. That's all over a replay.

It was pretty awesome. Pretty good play. Pretty good play. He sounded like Norm. Well, it sounds like. So typically you'll hear color guys. Yeah. That will make the guttural consonant sounds while the play-by-play dude's describing what the action is.

Yeah. The roles were reversed there. And you got Collinsworth breaking down this entire replay. And Tariqo has nothing to offer but sex sound. Here's a little bit of it again. All those black and gold uniforms of Landon Roberts over there as well. Let's see. I think it's

a Landon Roberts who's going to take a running start. Oh, what a play. And just tied it up perfectly. Trico, can you get your hand out of my crotch, please? I'm trying to drive away. That's the one right there. That's like he's

shaking it off. That was really good. Thank you, Rob. Here's a quick montage Danny made. We've talked about this before, but when you really look out for it, Danny pinpointed from CC. So in the first half, opportunity right here. You're going to see a guy.

Oh, a guy. See a guy. Open space in behind the defense. And it is impossible to watch this team on tape and not look at number 13. He is just that guy. He's the T.J. Watt of this defense already. Overshown is one of those guys that just looks like lightning out on the field. Give him some credit.

There's some guys on the back end. Donovan Wilson. He loves the guys. Loves guys. He loves resetting the fact that we're watching football players and they all have cocks. That's right, in my America. They're dudes.

They're guys. That's right. Do you guys know who was on at halftime? You probably saw this, right? Even if you weren't watching, listen to the audio. Oh, Snoop. The president of

NBCUniversal, Calvin Snoop Dogg Roddice. He was on a lot in the pregame running around. Well, if you recall, he basically carried Olympic coverage to the bill of, I think we heard half a mil a day. Yeah, doggy dog world. Was it half a mil a day or 50,000 a day? Last night we were saying 50,000. No, dude, I'm pretty sure. Let's get this right because

50,000 is not crazy. That makes more sense. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's for a whole day for Snoop? Yeah. Snoop ain't getting out of bed for 50 grand, bro. No way. He made overall 9 million. God almighty. Sweet. And paid. G-O-double-G is in the house.

Paid no expenses. And he's also, now, maybe he's been on it before, but they're pimping him pretty hard in the promos for The Voice. This is the first season that he's judged. Okay. Yeah. The promos are built around him and Michael Bublé. They're the two new additions.

Michael Bublé's on the, oh, can I have my own Kemp Spin now? For rehab? Yeah. Whoa. I was thinking about it. Put him on there? I was thinking about it a lot when I was there. Jake has a Kemp Spin. You know that podcast that podcast yeah i went to rehab for a month yeah yeah i want that one uh do you remember my michael buble note no it's great when he was uh

the all-star game the nhl all-star game was in whatever canadian town he's from but i don't remember which one. And he was supposed to do some sort of press conference with someone from the NHL. I think he was performing also. And he got up there and was like, I got to be honest, my friend told me I was microdosing, and I took way too many mushrooms before this press conference.

He's a Vancouver kid. Gained a lot of respect for him that day because his songs are very gay. You are Kim Spin number 517. Hell yeah. I want a plaque. Congratulations. Hey, thanks, guys. Hey, Rob.

Producing on the fly, I just texted you something that I might need for viewer mail. Sorry. So, yeah, Snoop, Michael Bublé, they're showing him in the crowd. He's unlike Lil Wayne. Snoop is a Steelers fan and only a steelers fan lil wayne will hit you with the packers the patriots uh snoop dongle do the same thing yeah keep in mind he's not from pittsburgh i know he's a lakers fan right yeah no of course yeah he's from the lbc yeah yeah i saw somebody put out on twitter just him in various yeah Ten different jerseys, kind of the Micah Parsons of.

Yeah, I guess that's true. But I've always identified him as a Steelers guy. Okay. Some others you might have more of a Micah type thing. So he was on at half, which is just a pimp piece for the boys. Here's my Paris pal from the Olympics. Snoop is back in the house. The house?

It is good to see you. Every place I go, people stop me and say, I loved Snoop at the Olympics. Hey. Snoop, it is good to see you. Every place I go, people stop me and say, I loved Snoop at the Olympics. Hey, Mike, it's good to be seen, man. The Olympics was a beautiful thing for me to be there with you and along with all of the athletes and the families in different countries. It just represented peace and love, and that's what I'm

all about, so I was happy to be able to show the world that that's who I am. With Martha and Michael and the whole gang, now you're here in part because you love the Steelers. Where did it start for you? 70s early 70s uh watching the game 1974 three-year-old baby falling in love with the Steelers and then watching it in 75 76 and then seeing the Mean Joe Green commercial and like every kid that's seen that commercial I wanted Mean Joe to throw me his jersey.

That's right. So I can give him my soft drink. That's why it's so cool to see the Steelers and the Cowboys here tonight. Two of those great brands. I've loved you on The Voice. It's been a lot of fun. That's fine. With Michael Buble and Reba.

And Gwen, what's it been like for you? You brought a little sports feel to The Voice. I did. I brought some of my football coaching tactics to The Voice. You know what I'm saying? Because I felt like each player should be coached, you know, differently skill set-wise, and I felt like that's some things I learned on the football field.

So I wanted to bring that to the football field as well as to the, you know, to the voice set to make sure I could have some coaching from on field, on screen, on set to make everything beautiful. Well, check it out. Mondays and Tuesdays, The Voice on NBC. I'll give you a little hint. There's a surprise guest on The Voice tomorrow night. It is? A surprise? Check it out. Great team, Snoop.

Love you, Mike. Love you, Mike. Does he really love Mike? So basically, he was a kid and he was a frontrunner. Yeah. And then he just stuck with it for the most part. Who's the best team in the NFL? Oh, it's the Steelers? Yeah. I'm going to follow them. However, as I've said before, people get mad at me.

I wish that I could have grown up like a Steelers or an Eagles fan. It just seems cooler. Back then, I guess I get it because not every team was on TV all the time. Yeah. Which is why there's a lot of Cardinals fans around here, right? For sure, Braves and Cubs were about all that. I know you were the same way that I watched yeah so I guess I kind of get this but it's still pretty annoying

and then let's go to the videos because I think that's all the audio we're going to play do we have some videos yeah you want to do let's see I say whatever you want big chief yeah play them in order the hitting the effing nuts I say whatever you want, Big Chief. Yeah, play him in order.

Hitting the effing nuts. Play this one. Tyron Smith commenting on the – Tyler. Tyler, sorry, my bad. Tyler Smith commenting on the Tolbert catch and what happened. It's okay. I mean, it was miraculous. I mean, bro.

I mean, it was miraculous. I mean, bro. I mean, it was miraculous. I mean, JT literally sprained his nuts. Oh, excuse me. Sprained his nuts to play before it comes back. Makes the game winner. Unbelievable. Extended play. I mean, that's guys playing above the 2.3.

Dudes emptying the clip. I mean, it was great stuff. Okay. What? Sprained his effing nuts. I'm looking it up. Oh, excuse me. Sprained his nuts.

Best part. Can you strain your testicles? Sprain. Not strain. You can definitely strain them. Oh, yeah. Sprain. Yeah, I'm not seeing anything.

Maybe he meant strain. Try sprained his effing nuts. I looked up sprained nuts, and it auto-corrected it to strained and tried to direct me to websites that your roommate might have been in. No, it changed it to drained nuts. Drained nuts. That was the problem. That's right. There you go. Sorry.

The show got dirtier since Jake got back. Hey, now. Testes ready. Expect testes. What's the next one? Do you want to do the other one? This is just the postgame in the locker room, and Dak has a surprise for Coach.

Hey, we'll give you the schedule. We'll get you the schedule on the play. Hey, guys, great job. Way to hang. Keep banging. We talked about this thing schedule. We'll get you the schedule on the play. Hey, guys, great job. Way to hang. Keep banging. We talked about this thing coming down the drain. 3-0.

3-0. 3-0 on the road. Hey! Clarifying. Where's my general one? McCurley. Yeah, quick. Real quick.

No general McCurley, but everybody knows we're in Pittsburgh. We don't give game balls often, but my man. Fire a bell! How are you feeling? Breaking down. We're still doing.

How about them Cowboys? Cowboys on three. One, two, three. Cowboys! How about the Cowboys? Oh, God. That's gross. We're doing never won in Pittsburgh.

Interesting. First time. With the Packers or anything, yeah. We're doing how about them Cowboys after a week three eke out win over another or week five eke out win over another average team. Yep. That's storming the field. We've devalued that.

We're storming the field. Oh, man. So that's the Cowboys. When you do look at their upcoming schedule and if you think the Cowboys have any chance at all of getting into the playoffs, last night was fucking huge. The season would have been over. Huge.

I mean, I know it's an AFC game, so it's not against your division opponent, but the season, I think, would have been effectively over. And the narrative on Dak, if Tolbert drops that ball or Dak overthrows him and they lose that game, it is a 180 from everything you read. Dak overcomes two interceptions to end up a hero at the end of the game. The other side of that would have been, why are we paying this guy a quarter of a billion dollars?

It's amazing that just they really need to get you know two of the next four at least to to stay afloat fortunately the eagles are in complete disarray that helps but that's balanced out by the fact that washington pulled their head out of their ass that's why i really think if they go get davante adams and they just start throwing the ball try to become a supercharged offense, that's their only chance of their defense being good. Because then, perhaps they will play with the lead, and eventually Micah and D-Law will be back, and they can

get after the quarterback again. But right now, very boring. Hey, viewer mail today is going to be brought to us by Early Bird CBD Gummies. Yeah. They are not the regular, you know, you've probably tried CBD or if you have in the past and been like, hey, CBD, it doesn't really do much for me. These have THC in them.

That's right. So they are a recreational hemp product. It must be illegal. In fact, one of my guys at the watch party last night, we had a couple of bags of these. We just passed them out. One of the guys is like, ah, they drug test at work. And that's right. He knows the deal.

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DUMBZONE. All one word. And yeah, they're an Austin company. Look at us just supporting all these or being supported by and being friendly with all these texts. We're just all about Texas. That's right. That's exactly right.

So put a smile on your face. Take the edge off earlybirdcbd.com. Use the promo code DUMBZONE. These are legit. I'm just going to do a couple birthdays. Can I do one first? Oh, yeah. Do whatever you want.

I don't really think it was set up this way necessarily, although at the end I did mention it. My check-in day, you know, for me, I'm probably going to call it, for my check-in day to treatment, my personal 9-11. Because it was on 9-11. Oh, it was? I didn't realize that. The most on-brand thing for our show of all time.

On 9-11 is when you checked in to rehab? Yeah, my wife and I drove down on 9-11. Wow, now you'll always remember. I won't forget. I'll never forget. But will you rebuild? Yes, I hope so. And yesterday I got home

and today's my son's second birthday. So I'll never have to tell him I wasn't there when you turned two that morning. His Jordan Lewis birthday? Yeah. I like it. Landry.

Okay. That's my birthday. Well, happy birthday to tiny little Carter, who probably doesn't know a thing, right? You know how it is when you leave for even a week. Oh, no, I'll bet he changed a bunch on you. Yeah. Did he forget who you were?

No. He's really into the football now, though. Like, he has a football, and he never really showed any interest to it. And I almost started crying last night. He's like, what about it? He's like, don't it to me. I'm like, oh, yeah, bro. You got Joe's jeans, not mine.

So Rob, I think I'm going to use the one picture I just put in, but not the other viewer mail that I had put in earlier, if you were having to put those in some kind of an order. But I just have a few birthdays for you and then we'll get on to some news. Dear Senior Slit Smasher. These have gotten out of effing control, by the way. I don't see how there was more room for that.

Trust me. Blake did a montage and it'll blow your mind. Patreon Day 3 Substack Day 1 here. I'd love a birthday shout out for my Andre Kirilenko birthday. My leaders are Mike Soroy's monologue skills, 90s Dan, and Blake's hatred for Kevin Burkhart, KB.

Hey, KB. I'm not sure if you have any, but I'd love to hear some Blake drops. Also, happy birthday to Carter Kemp from Fro. Does that bother you? Jeremy. Does that bother you that he knew it was Carter's birthday? Well, maybe not, because if he was listening last year, then he would have known.

Yeah, no, that doesn't bother me. It's kind. Yeah. Venmo at the dumb zone. Caitlin Clark looks like she keep it hairy. George Clooney. Well, that's a good note. Chuck Berry.

Think I golfed with him. Mark Zuckerberg. Why don't you fuck off, Gene? Charlie Pride. Meghan Markle. Meghan Markle. Ian Johnson. Naked gay body.

All right. Unphased. Happy 47th, fro. I was a big AK-47 fan. You? I was a fun jazz team. Yeah. Let's get back to this. Who else? Boozer.

Darren Williams. Darren Williams. Mamet Okur. Oh, yeah. Hey, Uncle Clit Commander. My daughter turns one year old today. I'd like to get a name check. The father of a one-year-old daughter is addressing you as the clit commander.

I mean, look at him. So he wants a name check from you. Okay. She was born in Hawaii, but we're both white. Is it cultural appropriation to name her Preston Kai? K-A-I. No.

That's okay. Because the first name is so goddamn white that I think you're okay. This is from Jared Walsh, who says, P.S., the boys is a great show. This has gotten out of control.

Did you start it or something? No, it's all he talks about. You started it, dude? I've thought about it before, but then I was like, oh wait, I'm not gay. Dang. Yes. Finally we have an ally. Yeah, I used to like Rob, too. Rob's like,

nah, I bailed after three. Rob watched three of them, the first in Cleveland. And then he didn't watch any more. What's worse? I made it through half of one and said, this isn't for me. Picture Superman with a Twitter account. Yeah, no, I know what it is. Gay!

And when people were trying to sell it to me, like, bro, it's different than other superhero shows. These are like real people. That's exactly what they said. They're real people, man. These guys have superpowers. That's exactly what people told me, and I bought it, and I tried to watch it. Can they just make another show about cops and selling drugs? Because I'll watch every one of them every time.

The thing is, I understand. If you guys don't really understand, it's a highbrow. It's a thinking man's show. Picture the Flash, but he has premature ejaculation. Yeah, right. Dan's show. Picture the Flash, but he has premature ejaculation. Yeah, right.

Right. It's the Green Lantern, but he doesn't have time to pay his property taxes or dispute them, so he's on own well. Like, oh, it's so relatable. You guys suck. No, I'm not even mad. You know what's funny? Not his obsession with this show Because Dan doesn't give a damn about anything But how defensive he gets

If you come at him about it He doesn't do this with anything else There's nothing else that befaces him But if you say I don't know don't watch it Oh you don't want your boys Look how cool I am You get that

Oh look at Danny See he's doing it right now Somebody once made fun of Danny I'm sorry He's doing it right there Oh, you don't want your boys. Look how cool I am. You get that. Oh, look at Danny. See? He's doing it right now. Somebody once made fun of Danny. Well, here's the thing. I'm sorry. He's doing it right there. Oh, yeah. He was already taking a run at Rob earlier.

This is awesome, by the way. I missed this. Can't make fun of Danny. Danny dancing in here. Oh, more Dingu. Full of piss. Dude, you know, I was- Who's got Dingu on?

It really does a lot. Well, you know, the thing, I'm bullshitting you guys. I love the show. And you know why? Because I realized right away that one of the main characters was kind of supposed to be trump and i just really love love when the creators of a show try to get a political message across but maybe you don't get it if you're not smart enough to pick it up but i obviously you did not now make fun of him because he was in rehab i would would never do that. Okay.

I'm sure that won't become a... This time, you know, I'm just happy he's okay. I just want him to be safe. Yeah. And be back with his family. Right. Like a homo would.

Hey, Dan. Just chase it to the end. Amazing. I'll need the picture in a moment. Hey, Dan, I want to wish my husband, Blake, day one, DF number 77, happy 38th birthday. His leaders are the unspoken hatred Dan has for Dingu and Blake's sweet, sweet voice. More Jake, more Blake, never Sarah Heppola. Love, Lisa. sweet voice more Jake more Blake never Sarah Heppler love Lisa and then she says here's a very normal picture of us and apparently this is kind of like a Halloween picture I guess

and so she that's obviously Bob Ross yeah and I think she's supposed to be a lot lizard. Okay, yeah, I like that a lot. Because you look at her menu and it says H-J, $1 sign, B-J, $2 sign, Quickie, $2 sign, Butt Stuff, $4 signs, and then different payment possibilities like drugs, cigarettes, benefits. I like it, yeah, and she's got the get-up on, plus the lizard headpiece. Yeah, it's good. Do you think they made love that night in costume?

Have you ever made love in costume? Pretty close. I was not necessarily. That would make you feel like you're on the boys. Some of them will just hammer away at each other. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You see boobs in it?

Is that selling? Am I selling you guys yet? What a last ditch. That's boobs. That's putting Zeke at center right there. Nothing else is working. Get a boob. Last play of the year.

Let's just give it a go. All right. Oh, you know what we're going to do for a news sponsor today? Something that's often in the news would be... Oh, no. You're still flipping over in the car. I know. And what are you doing?

Well, you're dialing, but the thing is, you might not be able to dial a bunch of numbers. All you can really get is the area code and one other digit. Yeah, these are all threes. Yeah, so you get a 214 or an 817, then just 333. That's right. 333. Frankel and Frankel.

Yes, sir. Personal injury attorneys. Let me tell you what came in quite handy. This is not really on the copy points, but I took my Frankel and Frankel. Yes, sir. Personal injury attorneys. Let me tell you what came in quite handy. This is not really on the copy points, but I took my Frankel and Frankel notebook with me. Oh, wow. Yeah. They're very nice notebooks. So if you have to stop at their office for a consultation, they have a nice notepad. That's your copy.

Yeah, that's it. See, I was thinking how insurance companies are going to try and take advantage of you, and then Frankel and Frankel will fight for your rights. And maybe give you a notepad. See, I didn't even know that they would do that. Yeah. Yeah, they have the experience and knowledge to win in the courtroom. You give them a call.

You're going to talk to a partner. You're going to have somebody, a decision maker, on the line immediately. So they're great. They are great. They're big sponsors. immediately. So they're great. They are great. They're big sponsors and, you know, they need to get you what you deserve if, in fact, you do deserve something. That's right.

Yeah. Yeah, and you're going to have, you might start getting calls, you know, if there's a police report some fly-by-night legal operation is going to swoop in and tell you Hey, hey, hey. You're out of order. You're out of order. The whole trial is out of order. You know what? I'm just going to leave it to the sound board.

Yeah. It's okay. So, Frankel and Frankel. Yep. Do we have, like, a hard out today because we have a ride and stuff or what? I actually just texted our ride, said we'll be about a little bit later. And he said he'll be waiting out there for us What service? I might go so far as to say elite service

It's such elite service And he said he'll have a nice cold water for you Okay Yeah Here's Jay with the Dumb Zone News Let's do this one first This comes to us from Kamau County.

Kamala? No. Kamala County? No, not Kamala or Kamala County. Kamambla, whatever he was calling her. The far left of the state? Yeah, the far left prosecutor who locked up

the center right of the state. No, Kamau, like the Yeah, the far left prosecutor who locked up. The center right of the state. No, Kamau, like the Kamau River, which is down a little bit northeast of San Antonio, the county near Austin. Not that far from where I went to college. We don't do all these stories, but this one's got a little bit of a twist to it. Of course, I'm speaking of a teacher-student sex story involving a female teacher. She51 does not list the age of the luckiest boy in the world. Yes, that's older than most. When is the ceremony? A lot of times these are early 20s, you know, and you've got

an early 20s-ish, 22, 23-year-old lady, 24, and, you know, a strapping young 16-year-old. The TV show. The teacher. My teacher or whatever. Was it the teacher? Yeah, I think so. Yeah.

Yeah, that's how that was depicted. Yeah. Well, she was 51, or is, Jennifer Massey. She was caught having sex with a minor student by police. And here's the twist on it, and I want everybody to be honest here, although that's probably not Really something I have to say Because if you've done this And you guys are all pigs

You'd brag about it She was arrested After the police were called to an Under construction home Where her and her Pupil Were engaging in a sex act Good place to go Have you ever done it? No pupil were engaging in a sex act.

Good place to go? Have you ever done it? No. Like snuck into a house that's, you know, nearing being finished and, let's go in here. I did that once. Yeah, nice. It was probably 50% done,

but it was, you couldn't see into it from the outside, but there were no like, there was no brick. It was framed, and then whatever goes next and yeah. It's great. Now it's hot as fuck in there because it's Texas and it's summer and there's no insulation

and there's obviously no electricity but yeah, that was a... Yeah. Where was this? Rehab. You did it at rehab? No, it it was a very very long time ago very very long they were building a home to the facility next door yeah no it was a long time ago but uh i also was not a teacher no there wasn't was she no the lady you're assuming it was yeah i shouldn't assume you shouldn't it's 2024 but i did, you know, how much more trouble I would... I think I would have definitely gotten a trespassing charge.

What's her name? There's no chance, bud. And she's how old? 51? In this case, I thought you meant the name of my girlfriend when I was 19. No, no, no, no. C-O-M-A... Here we go.

Rob found her. Yeah, there you go. Could be worse. Sure, there you go. Could be worse. Did you say she's 51? And it's a high school student? Yeah. Wow. Second degree

Filoni. I just want to know how these start. I can tell you exactly how they start. With phones. With chats through Snapchat. just want to know how these start i could tell you exactly how they start okay go ahead with phones with chats yep through snapchat tiktok instagram probably not twitter no i'm saying like the initial icebreaker uh i think like how do you get to that point they probably both feel a little something usually i would say the aggressor more than the victim,

if we want to call them that. Yeah. And then they kind of put out the vibe. You have a human being, the younger person, who has zero reasoning capabilities or capacity for control of emotions. Sounds pretty smart to me. They're horny as hell. Yeah. You know, it's like Pete Horny.

And here's a lady. I would have probably had sex with any 50-year-old teacher that texted me and said she wanted to. Any. Boy, you didn't go to my high school. No, I'm saying, dude, he was in Ohio. Some of those... You don't think he had a couple of like... You know how that is. You know, two and a half bills

slow facts. When you're that age, man, you don't know. It's whatever. Yeah. You're just looking for anything. At least me. Maybe hot guys like Danny slaying it all over the place. You didn't know me in high school. I just know what you look like.

You're a snack. Let's see here. Late last night in fort worth a bar fight that occurred actually resulted in a shooting a police chase and a crash this is the rare bar fight that did not stay a bar fight so uh around 11 o'clock last night two two rival groups, you know, they were just snapping in the bar, snapping. And then all of a sudden it turns into a big fight. Both groups leave the club. They get into their cars, one of them in a Dodge Charger, the other group in an SUV. And they're firing at each other on the road.

Wow. Okay. And the SUV crashes into a pickup truck. The Charger flees. Police chase it. to a pickup truck. The charger flees. Police chase it.

This feels just like back in my day. We'd settle that right there. Somebody grab a bar stool. Somebody grab a bottle. The cops are there and it's over. Did you mention what neighborhood

or what bar? It doesn't say the bar, but it's... Don't you own a bar in Fort Worth? Not anymore. Oh. We shut that bitch down.

COVID was a tough call. Was it COVID? Yeah. Yeah, we never recovered. But your other one's still open, right? Yeah. Oh, yeah. I know where this is.

This is like North Fort Worth. So then police are chasing both the cars at the same time? Not all the way North Fort Worth. North like 28th Street. Northeast 28th Street area. Yes. And they'reth Street area. Yes. And they're trading gunfire. Yeah, who should I fight here? Right. Now the police are chasing both of us.

Should we band together? Maybe let them just take care of it. So they weren't, this didn't happen inside the, I don't know, the boiled owl or something. No, it wasn't at the boiled owl. God, I loved that place. So smoky and...

Wait, what time did it happen? Around 11? It was probably cowboy related. Yeah, they're all pissed. Everybody's fired up and hammered. That was still during the game. Yeah, but you're pissed because it's a slog. You're like, what is this?

This isn't NFL football that I want to see. You had the over. Yeah. What was it? One. 43 and a half. Oh, the over. 43 and a half.

Dude, I have a three-team parlay, and if New Orleans hits tonight. Yeah, I came back yesterday to find out that Dan is not just doing our picks and knockout league. He's hitting three leg parlays now of his own just having fun he's drinking yeah i'm drinking lick you left and i fell apart he eats bananas now yeah instead of apples i do this story specifically because danny is here but uh recently i think over the weekend the the 76th annual Big Tex Youth Livestock Auction was held at the State Fair of Texas. And the steer, the winning steer, an 18-month-old steer named Haggard, named after Merle, netted the senior at Stanton High School $180,000 in Scully money.

Isn't that incredible? $180K. That'll at least pay for a class. That's a joke about the rising cost of education in this country. It's out of control. I never could understand why prize money you know when i was a kid if you had a top winning show steer or pig and these kids were walking away with like 30 grand which is 20 grand which in the 80s was a lot yeah that's wild and i guess they just donate this stuff to them I mean I had to sell mine Per the pound

Just for pork production Because it got sifted And I think I walked like $162 Sad state of affairs Did you ever raise a pig Dan in Ohio Let me think I don't think I did He was looking for a sex joke.

He was. Like, he was looking for an overweight girl joke. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He decided to pass. You guys don't know me. I had relatives that were kind of, that were hippies, but all we ever had, I think, was chickens. Not we, but we'd go to their house and they had, you know, a real hippie backyard and they had chickens. But for some reason, I feel like there was a pig at one point.

Maybe my grandparents had one on their farm. Did you see Nate Bargatze this weekend? I watched a couple sketches, but I am planning on watching it with the wife tonight. Did you see the George Washington one? No, I heard they went back to it, though. All I've seen is— Just talking about chickens and pigs. All I've seen is the spoof, which I feel like we should have written 10 years ago

because I used to religiously watch the show, and I know Danny did, was the spoof of Sábado Gigante. Okay, I didn't see that. Or La Gramita y Costel. La Gramita y Costel is another podcast. Sábado Gigante is like Mexico Saturday Night Live, but it's exactly how mexican you think it is like there's a mexican dragon costume beef bee costume uh

it's the most over-the-top shit you could ever see on tv hot chick little people always like a club dress get a little person out there without a doubt. Or a kid with a beard. Yeah, and they'll play games. None of the rules make sense. Prizes are terrible. Shit going on everywhere. Like a KT game. Stop doing that.

It's so true. You didn't. I was. It's Mexican KT. We ramped that up when you were gone. And the guy talks about... I could expect nothing less. Anyways, they interviewed the young lad who...

Or maybe it's a woman. Jade Stone? What do you think? Oh, this one says his. Okay. He says, It's everyone's dream at a cattle barn to win a major. A major?

Yeah. It's an accomplishment to me. This is one of my biggest accomplishments. Sun up, sun down, late nights, early morning. This is all we do. That's how it was for Danny as well. I know. I take my commitment very seriously.

Let's see. What else do we want to touch on here? Oh, yeah. This is a tough one, pal. We got a Matt Bush story, and it's not about getting back to the bigs. You run over someone else's head? I don't think he ran over somebody else's head

and tried to flee this time, but he did try to flee this time. Oh, no. Yeah. He, of course, did quite a bit of jail time before. There was a real sports about it, if I recall, where they interviewed the guy whose head he ran over. He forgave him, and it was a great comeback story.

He was with the Rangers off and on for six years. And last year, or I suppose this year, was his first year out of baseball. But he was arrested around 8.30 on Friday night. He was driving erratically. They tried to pull over his lincoln aviator and instead of pulling over he says fuck it sped off and the officer lost sight of him just a little bit later there's a crash reported involving multiple vehicles the cops show up at that and he takes off and eventually they track off. And eventually they track him down. Well, not they track him down, but bystanders chased him down and detained him.

Really? Some good Samaritans. Hmm. You think you're built for that life? No way, no. I'm just not a good Samaritan, that's the problem. Yeah, so he did 52 months. Yeah, hard prison, right?

Yeah. Yeah, and when he got out, he was trying to make his way back. Yeah. He did. Didn't they? Yeah, but leading back to that, and he was really good at times. He was. Like, incredibly good.

Yeah. But is he, the story with him, and I think other pitchers have probably gone through this, where he had to, like, audition in a parking lot at a restaurant or something like that. Yeah. Some agent or a scout. Okay. I know he had to do an audition, but I think also he was working at a restaurant, and on break he would go throw to another guy who worked there.

Yes. And I think he did. It was like a Friday. Yeah. So the whole story just seemed really beaten. By the way, love Fridays. Hit us up. Sure.

Half off apps, right? But I'm just saying, you know, if you're... Love the flair. Gotta have the proper flair. Oh, is that from this one? Oh, my gosh. Yeah, that looks like now. Does that look like when you got into rehab no but i will

tell you i did keep my photo because i hadn't had a haircut in a long time and my beard my my beard was about the lengths that matt bush is there and that makes you look just shittier already my eyebrows are out of control still i get them waxed um did your roommate do that? Yeah, he did bring wax strips, but I didn't – I don't know. The lady I get it done by that Dan also goes to, she's a pro's pro. Yeah. But you – they do have a full panel like you're a dinosaur at Jurassic Park of every bit of information about you with the picture you got when you got in i was you know i look bad but it wasn't like i was

in a panel of people that look great you know everybody kind of does yeah um yeah so i don't know what's going to happen to uh bush here but uh it's not looking great you know you've already done i think in texas you have to have at least a second dui to get a felony i don't think your first one is does that sound right danny well i don't even know if his first uh so i don't know this probably doesn't have anything to do with his prior dwis that landed him in prison for as long as he was in right i don't know. This probably doesn't have anything to do with his prior DWIs that landed him in prison for as long as he was in, right? I don't know. And if that carries over from state to state.

Well, okay, here's the thing. He had already been arrested for felony assault before that. He relapsed at some point during his second stint as a player. That's right. I feel like that's true. One of the times that he got arrested, he, oh yeah. Okay, we'll go to the 2009 one. According to witnesses, a drunken Bush beat up a high school lacrosse player

with a golf club while screaming, I'm Matt fucking Bush. Okay. The kid needed to know. Yeah. And then a late developing story here. This just took place about an hour ago. A small plane has crashed into Eagle Mountain Lake. Hmm.

Yeah. No word on how many people are on board yet or if anyone was hurt, but... These small planes, Dan, feel like a death trap. Yeah, I don't know if I'll ever go in one again. I suppose if somebody offers me a PJ ride, then I'm

going to have to do it. Well, those aren't really small, are they? That's a jet. I don't know. A small plane, I don't know. Private plane, or excuse me, a small plane. I've been on one or two, and you're real tight in there with at most eight people. A private jet is a, you know, that's a different animal, I would think. This is a really small plane.

What are you saying? You're in with, how many did you say? Eight or ten? At most, it was eight. It was somewhere in Latin America. I feel like I've been on one that size, but I considered that to be a private jet. Maybe it wasn't. It's not a jet.

Yeah. I don't know what a jet is. I was going to say, if you're about to ask me the difference between a plane. Yeah, yeah. Size? The jet engine. It has to be about the engine. The key difference between a jet and an airplane is that to be a jet, you need a jet engine.

A plane has to have a jet engine. Well, yeah. Fucking thank you. Yeah. Typically no propeller on a jet engine. Essentially every jet is an airplane, but not every airplane is a jet. Oh, I see here. A square rectangle sitch going on.

There it is. Look on your monitor. Yeah. I see here it says it's 6'2", 185 pounds. I knew where he was headed before he got there. What? Did he come off the bench? I mean, he was a first-round pick,

so he was kind of a starter for the first part of his career. Drafted by the Hawks, 10th overall. He's real pleased with himself, ladies and gentlemen. I'll just let you know that. And I think that's a solid way for me to... End the news? Sapuku the news today. Just let it die honorably like and subscribe nice reference in honor of shogun shogun cleaning out the emmys oh they did oh man

they want a bunch of stuff i guess i missed that yeah when is the one that nikki glazer's hosting was that it i didn't watch it. I just read the article. Okay, well, geez, dude. I'm not mad. No, I'm okay. I'm okay. I'm not mad. I'm not mad. Dan's the one that's mad today, not me. That's right. I'm mad because I don't have any Lone Star beer in front of me. We're going to talk about Lone Star beer for a second.

We had Lone Star and Lone Star Light at last night's watching party as well. In fact, what watching party would be complete without the National Beer of Texas? I ask you. Yeah, we have a partnership with Lone Star Beer now. Don't know if you saw this. We have their logo, their big sign is now in our studio as well.

Lone Star Beer, perfect with a tray of barbecue. Crisp flavor. It's also really good with pizza. Is that right? I had it last night with pizza. Oh, that's right. It's fantastic. Blake was pounding the pizza and pounding the Lone Star light.

They're celebrating. Oh, you were drinking Lone Star regular. Red can. Yeah. Yeah. Blake wants the red can. I get the blue can. They're celebrating 140 years of brewing in Texas, and they decided what better way to celebrate than to partner up with the Dumb Zone. So that's what they are doing. We're in a collab, I guess you would say, with Lone Star Beer. And they're awesome. Great dudes as well.

Awesome. Great dudes as well. And the Dumb Zone 21 is now set up on their website. So you can go to lonestarbeer.com. Use the code DumbZone21. You can get 21% off merchandise. You must be 21 or over to purchase merchandise at lonestarbeer.com. So, you know, go check them out. I saw grabbed a 12 pack the other day in the grocery store as well because we need a little extra for the party so lone star beer and don't forget lone

star light that's my thing lone star light um right now i press this button and all of a sudden we're doing this. It's Monday, October 7th. Our elite ride is waiting outside for us, so we'll get there in a moment, Jake. On this day in 1916, it was the most lopsided victory in college football history. I suppose it would also be the most lopsided victory in college football history. I suppose it would also be the most lopsided loss in college football history. But it doesn't

say that here in the copy point, or in the AP copy. Georgia Tech, coached by John Heisman, faced Cumberland University. What do you think their nickname was?

Cumboys.? Cumboys. The Cumboys. They won 222 to nothing. What? Oh, hell yeah. There were no first downs by either team. Cumberland did not make one first down. And Georgia Tech scored on every offensive play.

What? What year was this? 1916. So we were wondering last night during the stream, was this how football was in the 70s? 17 to 13, just crappy, muddy, whatever games. But apparently there used to be higher scoring games. God, that is right at the top 10 things of things I wish were on video. What did the other team look like?

That's almost impossible to even consider, right? Could Cumberland that day... Maybe they were covered in cum. You want to go try them back? Can't see them. My eyes are stinking. Okay, could Cumberland from that day beat the best kindergarten team in the state of Texas right now? Well, that's interesting.

So you've got a group of 19-22 year old men and a group of 5-6... Kindergarten's a little silly. What if they have a 6-7 year old because they held him back? Kyler Murray? 9th grade team. You say any 9th grade team

could beat the Cumberland Cowboys. They could not beat a 6th grade team. I think that's where I would put it. Like I said, the best in the state, you're going to get those Friday Night Tykes kids. Do you think there's any way we can actually see this happen? AI might be able to make it happen. On this day in 1998, Matthew Shepard, a gay college student,

was beaten and left tied to a wooden fence post outside Laramie, Wyoming. He died five days later. Is this the one where some radio guy got fired for, or was that the dragging? Yeah, I think that was Jasper. I'm pretty sure. Was that a gay guy? No, that was a black guy. Yeah.

Anyway, they're both pretty bad situations. Way to step out there, bud. Is there a bright side to this story? Condemn in the strongest of words. The bright side is no radio guy got fired after this one because everybody knew this was much too serious to make any light of at all. Which is not that bright of a side because then there was less jobs for us.

So maybe this is just all over. Why don't you just... Move on? On this day in 2003, California voters recalled Governor Gray Davis and elected Arnold. Arnold. That was wild, dude.

That's when I learned what a recall was. Because like... Oh, yes, I learned that. No, no, no. I was wild, dude. That's when I learned what a recall was. Because, like... Oh, yes, I learned that. No, no, no. I didn't know that. It's not every state, but who all ran? Didn't, like... There's two younger black actors who were on shows.

You got Willis. There was only two? Webster. Webster and... Gary Coleman. Oh, yeah, Gary Coleman did run for governor. One of them two? Webster. Webster and? Gary Coleman. Oh, yeah. Gary Coleman did run for game. One of them was in that run.

Okay. Let's go Gary Coleman. Yeah. Who said? What are you talking about, Willis? That's right. What are you? That's his famous catchphrase.

On this day in 2006, mean green believers got to see UNT win a seven-overtime game. Rice. Nope. Damn. Florida International, where Dennis Hoppevac hit his fifth field goal of the game to win the game. Dennis Hoppevac spelled his name with one N, so it looks like D-ness. You guys are so immature

thinking that's funny. I won't have it. I don't feel like I had a choice. And on this day in 2023, Hamas-led militants launched air and ground attacks on Israel, killing nearly 1,200, taking more than 250 hostages. The attacks, followed hours later by Israeli counterattacks, marked the beginning of the current Israel-Hamas war,

which we here at the Dumb Zone condemn. Well, we issued a ceasefire. Which we here at the Dumb Zone condemn. Well, we issued a ceasefire. We, yes. Like the San Antonio City Council. Right. Weighing in, yeah.

Said they want no more bloodshed. Yeah. And the good news is that worked. Yes. And we'll never have another war like this again. Let's issue a proclamation that we also want no more bloodshed. What about a day? One day of total bloodshed? Well, that's a good idea too,

but I just think we need like a ceasefire day and then Luca Day. Oh, okay. Even in World War I, didn't the Germans and the Russians celebrate Christmas together in a one-day ceasefire? Is that not in your book? Is it Christmas yet?

No. Yeah. They'll get there. Don't spoil it for them. I thought it was going to end with August. Oh. But no, I, yeah, we're still. It's actually going to go to the next August, and I think the next August, too.

Okay. A lot of August in there. Yeah, and then eventually they're just writing about preseason football. Yeah. Four years of trench fun. Yeah, they were all they're just writing about preseason football. Yeah, four years of trench fun. Yeah, they were all pretty sure it was going to be a few months. You know, there was a young corporal. This guy is a few minutes away from telling me that the Treaty of Versailles was a little too strong.

Didn't have to smack him quite like that. Famous wedding on this date in 1989, Larry King, talk show host, married Julie Alexander. Oh man, what a great Wikipedia page. That is the sixth of his eight marriages. Which one was this, Julie Alexander?

That one made it three years. Okay, nice. His second to last wife. Famous divorce on this date. In 1988, Robin Givens filed for divorce after eight months of marriage to Mike Tyson. So did he remarry an old one? No. He did marry one woman twice, though.

His third wife he was married to for two years, got divorced, and got back together with her four years later, and then stayed married to her for another five years. How many wives did he have in between remarrying his former wife? One. No. Two? One. Yeah. One.

Yeah. And he was with her for... No, two! Two. One of them he was with for one year, the other one with for four years. So he was never not married. He was divorced over from five years and smashed two marriages in there. And you know, what's awesome about it, too, is he got divorced in 2019 when he was 85 and then died two years later. So it's not like he died. I can't live with her for this. Yeah. Like I know I'm about to die. She wipes me and all that, but no, I got to. Wipes me. Today's birthdays we lead off with 62 years old, former NFL running back, Tom Rathman.

Hell yeah. And you can see he was a clear other option. I mean, they should have thrown it more, but you had Tom Rathman. Let's go through his nine-year career. Rushing yards by year, 138, 257, 427, which was his career high. We'll just stop right there. What about him? 305, 318, 183, 80.

He was efficient, though, at 3.7 yards a carry. There's no Lipke without Rathman. I was actually thinking the same thing. He was a, though, at 3.7 yards a carry. There's no Lipke without Rathman. I was actually thinking the same thing. He was a special player, though. He was a, I don't know, he was a pioneer, Dan. I like me some Lipke. He's one of the few out there that actually cares about the game and would play without having to be paid, you know, shows up early. Dude, he's just a lunch-bail type of guy.

Knows where to be. Kind of seems like a coach on the field. Sure. Chase Daniel, 38. He's made so much money. Is he on the list already? Did you write mine down? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I saw him passed out in the middle of the day outside of Superior Grill in New Orleans. Chase Daniel? Mm-hmm. Hmm. We were down there for one of my brother's games, and Superior Grill was an awesome place, party place. It was a Saturday afternoon in the summer, so he didn't have anything to do. No.

Maybe they were just off. I don't know, but... Well, he's chased Daniel, so he didn't have anything to do. Yeah, but you don't want to be passed out, so maybe we were down there a little bit earlier. But he, like, never even got a shot as, like, I'll try starting with this guy for a year. I just saw him sit down in front of a tree.

Like so many spares have. Sit down in front of a tree and be like, maybe this is where I'll take a little nap. That's a good spot. Yeah. I'm Chase Daniel. Cool dude. Priest Holmes, 51.

In his day, man. Mookie Betts, 32. Did you see Profile Rob him yesterday I heard about that yeah I don't miss anything in October Evan Longoria 39 Le War Games

Evan Longoria vs Mookie Betts Longoria played for a long time longevity let's go Mookie Monk Wario has played for a long time. Longevity? Let's go Mookie. It can't be Mookie. It is Mookie. 69.6 to 58.6.

Mookie Betts, 32 years old. A lot older than I am. Hall of Famer? Yeah. I feel like that's... Yeah. I don't feel like Mookie Betts is a Hall of Famer, but if you say that and you're like, well, what if he adds another 20 or 30 war?

Yeah. Yeah. Charles Woodson, 48. Man. Bree Olsen, 38. Coach Heisman. Who's she again? Charlie Sheen's favorite porn star back in the day

when we were doing the Sheenius tour. Is that her? She's the one on the right. She is the blonde. Did she give him AIDS? Who's the guy in the middle? He looks like he's from Kids in the Hall. I was going to say, isn't he dead?

Didn't he drink too much? I don't remember. Is that him? That's the Kids in the Hall guy, isn't it? Yeah, she must be in a skit with him or something. Why is he giving her a mammogram? Oliver North, 81. Vladimir sold

weapons. Putin is 72. Contra Rebels or something. Simon Cowell, 65. I'm sorry, what was the one that Oliver North? Oh, dude, you know the best thing about that? Much like with Mark Furman, whenever there's like, hey, there's a trial going on. Let's check

in with this disgraced detective for his analysis of the crime. Whenever there's something popping off for America, like in a war, they're like, let's go to the conscious of any war effort. It's Ollie North. Some consider him a true patriot. Like on Fox News.

I'm like, this guy's a... He was arrested. I don't know. Dave Foley alive. No, that's not Dave Foley. Is it? I think it is Dave Foley. I don't know.

I think he did. He's looking really puffy. Yeah. Not there. He's looking pretty puffy. Yeah. Not there. He's looking pretty good there. Yeah. He's puffy. He was in... Was he in the recent Fargo?

Yes, that sounds right. Yeah. Yeah. Let's see. Simon Cowell, 65. Kingston. Allison Munn, 50. Says here, that 70s show.

So I thought you'd be stoked on it. Jamie Hector is 49. You want it to be one way. But it's the other way. Nicole Ari Parker is 54. She is Becky Barnett in Boogie Nights. The tall black lady. I just love Boogie Nights. We're going to mention anybody who's in Boogie Nights. The Tall Black Lady. I just love Boogie Nights.

We're going to mention anybody who's in Boogie Nights. Yo-Yo Ma is a cellist and 69. Tony Braxton is 54. We got him. Broke up the big three. And Tham York is 56. Yeah. Happy birthday, Tham.

Yeah. From Radiohead. I still haven't listened to your new record yet. I didn't know there was one. Yeah, the smile dropped a brand new one on Friday. Did you see Tham Brenneman did a college football game? on Friday. Did you see Thon Brenneman did a college football game? I was 99% sure

that was a drop until I looked up. Okay. Beth will get that for us. What did he do? Just say this. SMU TCU. Oh, okay. So like weeks ago? Yeah, but he put a headset on again.

He'd already been doing a little bit, right? The problem was he wasn't allowed to wear a headset. So all of the production notes were just like lost on him. Yeah, it's all over the map. Born on the stay now, Dad. Heinrich Himmler and Tony Sperano.

Love Tony Sperano. Author of one of my favorite football coaching bits of all time. I've mentioned this before, right? Yeah. When he took over as an interim coach, I think from the Raiders, and this is straight out of high school football practice. He had the whole team. He printed up a bunch of copies of their schedule up to that point

and brought out a bunch of shovels and was like, man, we're burying what's happened before. And they literally buried pieces of paper for inspiration. Like, yeah, this will do it. Does that stuff help? No, but I love it, though. I think at Clemson they have a little graveyard where they've buried play sheets or something.

I don't know. They got something like that. It's football. Football. Football. Football. You know. They got something like that. It's football. Football. Football. Dead on this day, still dead. We have Edgar Allan Poe. Devante. And early in your time

gone, somebody had emailed us alleging that Danny, because you were here and it was the old wall. And then you were gone, yet then we had this wall. And somebody said Danny came in and walled you up behind the pro-slap wall. That I went full telltale hard on your ass.

That's awesome. I felt very guilty because he heard your heart beating or something. But then I realized it was my own. Oh, you guys are fucking bored. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You missed some quality programming. And then also died on this day in 2005, Charles Rocket. It says here, comedian.

Oh, I've heard of this guy before, right? Then it says, suicide slit his own throat. He's in the SNL book. Which I would tell you that you are not going to be a, slit his own throat. He's in the SNL book. Which, I would tell you that you are not going to be a successful comedian if you're doing stuff like that.

That's not funny at all. Rarely hear that, if at all. Do you not remember this from the SNL book? Somewhat. They did a spoof of Who Shot J.R. of Dallas in the Who Shot J.R. episode. somewhat he did a uh they did a spoof of who shot jr uh of dallas and the who shot jr episode and uh so anyways charlene tilton's on it and she asks him playing jr like uh how do you feel

about being shot and in character he replied oh man it's the first time i've ever been shot in my life i'd like to know who fucking did it but it was live and in 1981 that gets you fired which is crazy i mean i guess it is network tv and they told him not to do it he did it anyways but i will tell you that as much as they try to edit the mcafee show they have no problem with the word shit for sure it's really just the f word and a couple others they don't get all the f words on espn really yeah on big espn shit is no problem they'll do that no matter what but like for example they had marshall lynch on the other day for the cow game about half of the audio was gone and a couple times they missed the F word or the N word. Interesting.

Yeah. There's hope for us all. He runs the company. Well, I like that. Right? We want power with the people. Right? We want power with the people.

Are you going to be here tomorrow? I need to ease my way back in. Okay. No, I'll be here tomorrow. Are we here tomorrow? It was almost like he was intimating that you were going to Bender tonight. Yeah, who knows? I met a guy who came in at the end, a sweetheart of a dude, but he was out.

He just got there like my second to last day. He was out for 30 minutes from his last one. 30 minutes? 45 days. 45 days, dude. And he was like, 30 minutes later, he was like, I was headed back to him. Wow. Yeah, I'm like, whew. Wow.

So as long as I clear the half hour mark. Yeah, I'm like, whew. Wow. So as long as I clear the half hour mark. Yeah. I'm not the worst. You should be fine. Yeah, we're going to stream tomorrow, but just for subscribers only. Okay. It's Tuesday and Thursday.

Oh, Tuesday and Thursday. You've got to go before this becomes a zoo. That's the show, I guess. Thank you for watching. Subscribe and type for my name if you want to watch more of my videos. I guess yeah Danny Bayless, Danny Bayless, Danny Bayless, Danny Bayless My pick-up's safe, Jake He's a winker and Jake can blink too Make us all laugh, make us all laugh, make us all laugh Ha ha ha ha

Please welcome to the show the genius Danny Bayless, Danny Bayless, Danny Bayless, Danny Bayless