The Dumb Zone FREE - DZ 4-20-26 | Brandon Aubrey is extended!

Episode Date: April 20, 2026

Catch every episode of The Dumb Zone by subscribing at DumbZone.com or Patreon.com/TheDumbZoneMerry 4/20 to all those who celebrate, Brandon Aubrey receives his extension from the Cowboys, and a big weekend check involving an arrest (00:00) - Open: Weekend check (55:15) - Sports: Brandon Aubrey extended (01:25:51) - Today in Twitter: Nike takes down ad (01:36:43) - News: Breaking Bad minivan death (01:55:38) - VM birthdays/Today in History ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Hello, I'm professional broadcaster Dan McDowell, letting you know that you were about to hear one of our free podcast. But if you'd like to subscribe at dumzone.com, you'll get four shows per week plus the weekend wrap-up and any bonus sods like our business Wednesday interviews. So if you forgot how to use the 15-second rewind, that's dumbzone.com to subscribe. Now, on to today's program. You know what this is for? Our pros are the nicest. We've got the best prices at flooring direct. They gave it away at the end.

The flooring direct. Kind of gave away the whole deal, too. The company that will come to you, direct to you, to your home. And they bring the floor samples and whatnot there. It's so great. It is. It's knocking something off your to-do list without you even really having to do anything. They come out.

They show you the floors. That estimate, that consult is free. And then they give you that five-star installation package, 4.8 stars out of five on Google. The people love it. That means like they move the furniture for you. They clean up when they're done. They don't eat your food generally? Do people do that?

I talked to somebody who actually, though, they had to pay a mover to get their furniture out and then pay a mover to put their furniture back. Flooring Direct takes care of that. FlooringDefW.com slash DZ. Great financing options available. Is that too early? RingDirect, DFW.com, DZ, you are called 972-449-9456. Our pros are the nicest.

We've got the best prices at Floor RingDirect. I only came here to do two things, man. Kick some ass and drink some beer. It's like we're almost out of beer. For those who celebrate, today we are not in the gameday. com, GameMencell Studio. That's in Dallas. We're in Fort Worth.

If this was called a den, it would be the best den that's ever existed. We've been here twice before. This is our third version here at the home of one Josh Ewing. Okay. I'm Dan McDowell. I'm Jay Kim. I'm Blake Jones. We have Foodie CK out here as well.

And did you know, not only this is 420, bro? It's Clayton's birthday. Whoa! That's right. Look at that. And unlike, yes, unlike Jake. Oh, come on, I work my birthday. I just take off my wife's, my mother-in-laws,

the day that we first kissed, my wife and I. Yeah. So happy birthday to CK. Foodie, Fudy CK. And happy, dude, it's Brandon Aubrey Day. How do we not just start the show with a full stop down? We have a rich friend now. Oh, that's right. Brandon Aubrey, so he's just signed his deal?

Like within the last half hour anyways, it was reported. Like if you, so they keep the contract over here or wave it in the air, like you don't want to smudge the ink, right? You got to let it drive for a little bit. Well, the first thing is you see the tweet and then you use, okay, A-D-A-M-S-C-H-E-F-T-E-R that looks right. Go to his profile. Yeah, he's got followers.

It's not a darn shifter. Go back. Is there a second sort? Would that be a weird? though fake tweet. It's not like the Luca trade. No, but I also don't... Oh man, you're not online enough. You're just doing mundane fake tweets? Bro, it can be

Jared Vanderbilt signed the two and it's like, why are we doing this? Really? Oh yeah. Yeah, or George Pickens died. Well, yeah. That's a bigger one. They know, that's, I get that. I get that. I don't get the... You still see... I'm off by a year on a contract. They get a mundane contract sign.

Not mundane for the general world, not for this world. No, I saw one the other day about Janus getting optioned. It was a fake from Evern Grunt. Anyways. Anyway, yeah. This is also the home of where we had Kevin Farley on the show. So I started to shake when I walked up to the house today. And then walking out of a, Josh is like, actually, and then he walks out of the back room,

it's Kevin Farley I paid the $250 appearance fee and Give him a sandwich And there he is Yeah Uh yeah

Happy birthday Clayton Thank you What are you gonna do I got you some early bird CBD Ah Yeah How about that On 420 day

What's their code We can give that out real quick Special code 420 Oh that's it Just 420 Mm-hmm Okay

Maybe you would think that get you 20% off site wide. No. Up the ante. 25% off site wide. Oh. That's good from today till next Monday. Okay.

And I believe Monday is the day today. The holiday starts. And then one week from today, a giant plant is risen. It emerges from like a tomb and signals the end of the site wide sale. Okay. I thought today is Columbine Day, but I thought it was the Oklahoma City bombing day, apparently not. No, but there is some tie-in, isn't there? It's the day before.

Okay. Because I did the Today and History stuff for the weekend, but. You got H-I-T-L-E-R. Is he today or yesterday? Today's Hitler's birthday. Okay. I think because Clayton's mom demanded that, like, they were waiting. Maybe Timothy McVeigh was just run a little play action.

No. They'll expect it tomorrow. The Columbine kids wanted to do it on the same day, but something in the mail came late or something happened. They had to push it back a day. They were trying to do it on the Oklahoma Day. Yeah. Oh, I thought they wanted to do it on the Hitler Day. No.

No, no, no, no. I'm 100% sure after reading the book. They wanted to do it on the day before, but something went wrong. They had to push it back a day. They were doing their, well. Should I read that Columbine book? I loved it because I knew nothing about it. Oh.

Not one thing. with the OJ book. That's surprising to me. I would have thought young Blake wants to learn all about Columbine. It was a little before and then I was just. Read the playbook for what I might do in the future. Oh, come on. That is the worst read you've ever had.

You think that's the opposite of Blake? I was a little private school kid. Blake views himself as the guy tackling the school shooter. Or I'm the girl Cassie who says, yes, I believe in God. Yeah. Yeah. No, he's a good kid, man. I don't know that I was ever like that, you know,

But you knew kids who were. Now, I felt a little too friendly with them for some people's liking. Trench code kids? Yeah. Well, you got to make sure they don't. Because they also played music, you know, and you need people in bands. And if you're trying to construct a band, your football team is not typically where you're going to find the talent. And they were the only other kids laughing at 9-11 with you.

It's true, wearing Bush T-shirts, yes. I cross-pollinated in a way that did not. please 70-year-old football coaches. And I wasn't good also. That's important. We can check, right? We can do a weekend check. We can have it brought to us by puddle pools.

Got my pool clean this weekend by puddle pools. Then they sent the report right after. That's my new pool company. Oh, they have some new copy, too. Actually just sent it last night if you want to check that out. But, dude, the old pool company. it was almost like they had a game to see how fast they could leave my house. Sure.

I don't know if you guys have had that, but they would just kind of pull up, scurry to the thing right away, do something with the chemicals, and they'd be out of there. These guys at puddle pools, they show up. He then brings out the big hose because he's going to do the vacuuming, all the little dusty, sandy-type vacuuming, not just the big, you know, anybody can get a leaf out. So he does the vacuuming.

They do the chemicals. They just make sure that everything is beautiful. They turn on the water to fill the pool if they need to. And then what's the new copy? They got a special right now. It is algae prevention. This is getting ahead of the brutal Texas heats. It's a little bit of a bundle discount cleaning chemical balance, equipment check.

Sign up for a year. They give you a month for free and throw in the algae prevention. That's an extra $100 value. People in DFW, they say, procrastinate pool prep until it's. too late, too hot. So they're trying to help you get in front of things. How about that alliteration? They're doing with a little preventative maintenance, basically.

Procrastinate pool prep? I love it. Prevent that. That's right. So go check them out at puddlepools.com slash dumbzone. That is how you sign up. Puddlepools.com slash dumb zone. Now, let's see what this jingle from Grady Spencer sounds like.

Puddle pool. If I said it, then I mean it. Hit puddlepool. I said, sell of the knee. Putterpool. Wait, I meant to say you dingee. Putterpools.com slash dumbstone. Yeah, okay.

Clean, clean, clean. I like it. Okay. All right. Weekend check. Do you want to go first since it's your birthday, Clayton? Or no? Oh, do you not have a mic?

Oh. That's me that. All right. I've had a big dog. Once a year, we allow Clayton to go first. Right. Gun show, coin show. Did go to a gun show on Saturday. Yeah, Saturday. Hit that up. Louisville action, the mall.

I think the thing I'm most interested in is how they always retain your interest. There must be just an infinite number of guns. Yeah, we have like a new gun. I guess it's old guns. But I guess it's like how you. But I guess that's like how you would say baseball cards are, right? And people go to those conventions, I think. Oh, yeah, there's big ones in Dallas.

To trade, right? Yeah. Trade, buy, whatever. No, I'm looking for a new left-handed shotgun, so sometimes you'll find a good deal. I thought they're all the same. Why? Because a shotgun shell firing at your face instead of away from your face. Oh, okay.

Yeah, that makes sense. I have a left-handed pump shotgun, but I want a semi-auto, so I can go start shooting sporting clays again. I always had issue with the scissors. My daughter has left-handed scissors. Oh. Yeah. Because it's like a different, the blade is shaved differently on the other side?

Well, it's flipped, and the grip is flipped. Oh, okay. You know, you can just get some that are like straight, so it doesn't have as much. But the blade helps and then the grip, yeah. And you didn't have that growing up. See the kids these days. No, I had to cut right-handed both ways. Soft uphill in the snow.

Yeah. But, yeah, so it's just really weird because the only thing I do left-handed is shoot. So it's, I'm just left-eye dominant, so that's just the easiest way to do that. and then it was just it was WrestleMania weekend two nights dude my timeline was was overflow with

feels like the natives are restless it was a kind of a bummer of a show both nights very short matches not a lot of excitement Dan are you aware to the extent to which ESPN

covers this event now it's kind of ruined all of these events ESPN has ruined the event? ESPN has ruined WWE. Yes. Okay, because I saw people complaining that WWE has ruined ESPN. Didn't McAfee get thrown through a table or something?

Yeah, Jelly Roll did a frog splash onto McAfee through an announcer table. What kind of madlib has this become? Jelly roll did a... I will say this. When I saw I Show Speed was there. Okay, you laugh, right? Dude, what is this? But no, hear me out.

Where's Kane? Logan Paul being into this, it just makes sense. right like you're just basically taking the natural talents of what do you do on your stream well we do like i'm in really good shape and i i'm a showman and i'm a salesman and i'm kind of playing a character it makes sense to me that those guys would be in wwe because wwee at the end of the day still has in theory like the corporate structure to let those guys eat right they can book a tour they can get all over, if you're I show speed, I don't know, like at some point

maybe your money maxes out. Well, it's just trying to grow the audience, basically, trying to get the younger kids. That's your value. So like, yeah. I mean, that was the big thing with Logan Paul. And then, yeah, you have I shows. Little Yachty was there.

Okay. When's the last time you thought a little Yachty? It's been a while. I feel like his five minutes ended an hour ago. Yeah. But yeah, it was just, I mean. People were pissed online. Yeah, it was bad.

Like, it wasn't the hype of the latter. Like, they were trying to build up. Like, they put McAfee in it and it didn't need to be in it. And Dan, I don't know if you know this, but they're always, to varying degrees, competition. There's competition. Like, when I was growing up, it was almost like a UFL or like an AFL type thing. Like, there was another league that would come on on different nights. And it was kind of like avant-garde.

And it was maybe 30%. It was like mad TV. You know what I mean? There was like a mad TV version of wrestling. The comedy was different. It was a little bit raunchier. Okay. It felt more Florida-e in some weird way.

And then sometimes guys would cross-pollinate. But now there's a bunch of these little independent operations. Yeah, a bunch of them. Their biggest competition. Like substack, right? Exactly. Or the cons. Yeah, they're the Jaguars.

The AEW. Yeah. His billions go into that. His son's the GM or kind of. One of the funny things this weekend. So, uh, WWE has a deal with Fanatics and then a deal with the NFL. Fanatics, Michael Rubin, my sworn enemy, the apparel company.

Um, so they have a special deal with all of the belts for the NFL teams. Uh, so there's a lot of these, uh, things going around of people like at the big WWE shop, because it takes over Vegas for the week. Like all these other small wrestling promotions come to Vegas. They have big conventions, and then just one huge convention center is just a W.W.E. shop. And they have all of the belts, and they're just a hole. There's just a hole where the Jaguars is because they wouldn't license the Jaguars logo to WWE to use for their belts.

So that was a fun. Like Jordan in the video game. Yeah, it was just like a fun. The Jaguars? Yeah, because he owns the other league. Oh, I see. Okay, yeah. So, like, there's, it's just like a funny little competition back and forth. But, yeah, not a lot going on there.

But I have a, it's back. Okay. American Gladiators. Really? It's back on Amazon Prime. It was gone. Oh, that show had been on for. Yeah, almost 20 years.

I think they might have tried to bring it back, but. Man, that holds a special place in my heart. Brother, I think the boy would love it. After, oh, that's a great call. Dude, after S&L, if you could make it through, there was some other show that came on first, I think, that sucked. And then you could get to American Gladiators at 1230, which 100% was a bad slash good beat.

There's no nudity in it, but you've got, like, roided up. Lace. Yeah. And they're wearing barely any. Did you not ever get hooked by that, like on late nights? I would imagine that would have been a come home from the bar. No. God, it was awesome.

So it's back. 89 to 96. Doesn't it seem like Clayton's, like, weekend is the same as if you had a 12-year-old boy walk in here, like. Guns and WrestleMania. I had some cool new fast food I found this weekend. Right, there was some new tenders. And, yeah, WrestleMania. I'm getting a gun.

That's just where you have a kid with no parents. Okay, I'm interested. Damn, dude, I can't believe you never got into that, Dan. Even as, like, a bit low. It's a fun show. American Gladiator. That's not the one with Beja, Bia Milla, or what is that? You know what I'm talking?

Okay. That may be before my time. No, no, no. It was in the last 10 years. Oh, he did like a reality show? Okay, let's see. It was a packer. Yeah, I see it here.

What was his, he did some TV show. Yeah. It wasn't called American Gladiators? Doesn't look like it. It doesn't look like it. Anyway, I'll go. I didn't have an eventful weekend. I know you did.

Big TV weekend, the DTF finale. Did it deliver? That's fine. It's a seven-episode series. It was good. But a lot of two. A lot of two outlandish stuff. And I realize you got to go, well, it's TV.

Okay. It's TV. Too much. I also watched. I'm not going to do the whole review now. but I watched the movie draft day. We're going to review that for Thursday. Speaking of, like, just too many unbelievable things.

And that's, I'm stopping down every five seconds in the movie. Yeah, I watched it for the first time this weekend. And I am very excited. Blake, you have to do it. I watched, I watched it with my wife. You're thinking Costner might get her a little juicy. Her final review was she loved it. No way.

Like loved. All caps. I think if you know something about sports, you're not going to like it. She's like, I'm like, do you want to watch this movie with me? I got to watch it for the show. She's like, well, I don't really know anything about football. Okay, if I get bored, I'm going to bail. She's like, I'm on the edge of my seat.

She loved it. She put the phone and Candy Crush down while they're in the draft room. She absolutely didn't watch. She wasn't playing Blocker. See, that's funny. I don't want to do the whole review right now either. Let's not do the review, but I'm just telling you. It was made for ladies.

There you go. I think it was a chick. She said in the end it's like a chick flick. Like she couldn't believe she's so happy. Anyway, she loved it. She wasn't distracted by how this would line up on Jimmy Johnson's draft chart. I was doing the math. Like, oh, God.

They're taking a beating. It's, yes, it might be one of the worst movies ever, but. Can I pause you real quick for an update on, Kabir. How do you say this name? Baja, Bia Milla. I just remember Bia Mila, right? I don't think he was on a TV show. I think you're thinking of somebody else.

However, this personal life Wikipedia page is insane. Let's hear. And deserves a full review at some point. I'll read you the last one. In 2020, he was arrested charge with contempt of court. This was in divorce court. He refused to sign a document that allowed his wife to access their bank accounts, arguing that as a sovereign citizen,

he was not subject to the law of the court and proclaimed, I have my own laws, which are superior. Nice. Were these ever published? The laws? I'd love to... Right, yeah, take a look. Maybe it's like law logic where DeMarcus Lawrence was on Twitter.

Pissed off that one times one still equals one. He, I'm getting Ty Walker telling me, American Ninja Warrior. Okay. That's the show. was involved in. Okay. For some reason,

it's not honest. That's the one that I would... Oh, there it is. I would watch with my daughter. Right. She loved it. It's gladiator adjacent. It's similar.

Hey, Josh, come over here, because for the last one, I have something relating to Josh Ewan. We had a guy named Josh Ewan's house. Okay, all right. And he'll, uh, he will deliver closing remarks, but... For this last piece of audio,

I wanted to play, though, just wanted to hear how did you say you paid for this whole event today? This was Ownwell. Ownwell. Oh! You actually went to ownwell. com.

Is it the or is it just dumbzone? Ownwell.com slash the dumbzone. The dumb zone. So yeah, what was the deal? Tell us about your experience going to Ownwell. It's as easy as could be. I just took one. to the site, signed up.

They literally did everything. It took maybe five minutes. They asked for a bunch of money up front, though, didn't they? That's one of the worst parts. Right. No, they, I think it was months later that they did ask for the money, but it was after they had saved me the money that I, they want a percentage of that. I didn't do the math, but I think it might be the lowest in the industry.

Good Lord. That is correct, Josh. It is. Like 25%. A lot of people will take 50%. So it's ownworld.com slash the dumbzone. I had the same experience. It's like a five-minute deal,

and then you just kind of forget about it. And then all of a sudden they're like, hey, here's some money. And then you say, whoa, that's pretty sweet. So thank you, Onwell. Ownwell is one of those sponsors we have that I routinely get wife compliments on. You know?

That's rare. I mean, she loves Early Bird, too, but Ownwell, every time we look at the site, she's like, damn. Yeah. That worked out. Who knew, especially because she's probably been the one who's done it before.

Oh, yeah. My wife did the whole... No probably about it, brother. Did the whole... Tried to do the appeal on your own, and it takes forever. Breaking, there are two Biamilas. They are brothers.

One of them hosts an American Ninja Warrior. One of them thinks he has his own laws and was tasered in divorce court. Okay, they were both in the NFL? Yeah, correct. Akbar is the one I like. Akbar... Yeah, Akbar, if you're going to plant your flag

with one of them, Akbar and Kiber. go Akbar. Okay, so... Maybe even Allah. Let me pause this for you. Because I have this piece of audio. You said, hey, let's use...

Let's find the Josh Lewin audio, because we're going to be at Josh Ewan's house. And at first I was going to play it during the break. Then I remember it's 420. And then I listened to the audio. And I'm like, we got to hear it again. And just kind of listen to it together. Yeah.

Okay. So this is our favorite piece of Josh Lewin audio. Josh Lewin was the Rangers play-by-play guy on TV in the early 2000s. Do you have a memory of Josh Lewin? Oh, he's, yeah. As a little kid. Huge part of my childhood. Him and Tag. Can I ask one quick question just to contextualize given events? What year was this? I believe 2005.

This audio? And he is doing play by play. Pondres. Unless it's 015. It couldn't be 15, right? It couldn't be that late. What do you think? Yeah, definitely. Definitely.

Well, oh, I think it's 2015. Okay, but even that, I'm just saying when you hear this, this might be a bigger deal today. He is also, I don't know if he still is, but he at least was, the play-by-play voice of the San Diego Chargers. And so he is doing that. I believe this might even be a preseason game. Don't know if that matters,

but he's doing a Chargers game to which he would just travel there every weekend and then travel back here or wherever he might even even been a Mets broadcaster by this time the point is this is quite shocking let's listen to it together and then we can listen again if we need to but it's our favorite josh lewin audio if there's a personal seat license you got to pay for there is i'd sit in it for a long time but a lot of these fans use that seat for about an hour again you know how copper wire was invented somebody dropped a penny between josephs Josh and his family member. Okay.

All right. We've got, let's see, 30 seconds mercifully remaining in this. I say that respectfully and endearingly, my partner. Love you too, buddy. Okay, so Josh Loon is Jewish. Yeah. And that is an old Jewish joke, I guess, right? That's how copper wire was invented.

I've never heard that joke, obviously just playing on the Jewish joke of... Well, I probably heard it here for the first time, yeah. Right. But I, and I don't, maybe there's a professional word for this. I'm not sure that there's a one-liner setup I prefer than that style of joke. Because it's so out of left field, right? And he just, hey, you know how. And because it gets the person right in.

Okay, all right. See, he's, sucker punched him. But he's, like, that's a great joke. But he's like, copper wire is so descriptive. So Josh Lewin, so if we listen to the beginning again. If there's a personal seat license, you got to. pay for? I'd sit in it for a long time, but a lot of these fans use that seat for about an hour today. Okay, so that does make sense. It's a preseason game. You had to pay for the PSL. So you had to

pay $10,000 just to even buy seats. You went to the game, you left after an hour. So Josh Lewin is trying to say, man, that's, I'll tell you what, here's what I'd do. I'd get my money's worth with that seat. I'm going to at least sit in it all day. And approach. It's very, very, run the ball guy. Yeah, an approach not unique to Jewish people. Right. It's like, hey, you've paid a lot of money for this. So that triggers in his partner's head.

This guy's a Jew I'm sitting next to. You know about that. I got something cool. I got something for this occasion. Let me pull this out. Yeah. This will be great. Yeah, and we're on the air. It's one that everybody will get to enjoy it.

That's the time to do it. Somewhere in his calculation is, Josh isn't really going to be that mad about this, right? I don't think it's hilarious. That's some level of it. A lot of these fans used that seat for about an hour. Okay, so he's thinking of it. How quick he's like, you know, you can't wait.

No question. For a long time, but a lot of these fans used that seat for about an hour. But then again, you know how copper wire was invented. Uh-oh. Now, at this point, what is Josh Lewin's face? What do you think his facial expression? Because certainly, if you're Jewish. You've heard it.

You probably know all the common Jewish jokes. So maybe he did sucker punch him. But it was a nice setup. You know how? And then there's a little pause. You know how copper wire was invented? Somebody dropped a penny between Josh and his family member. Okay.

All right. We've got, let's see, 30 seconds mercifully remaining. I say that respectfully and endearingly, my partner. Love you too, buddy. What happened to that guy? Nothing. Josh, did it get suspended or anything? I don't remember it being, let's look it up.

I mean, he's an old guy. I think there might, suspended one game. Hank Bauer. Suspended one game, 2014. And all I'm saying is just like today, current climate, I don't know how that would go if it would be different, but, you know. Well, let me thank Josh Ewan for having to be.

Having us out here, not only for using Onwell to have us out here, but for then making us go look up the Josh Lewin audio. Excellent. Just helping my Sunday night out because that was fun to listen to you. Excellent trip down memory lane. My weekend was actually, it was eventful, but it can be summed up pretty quickly. I went to New York on Saturday, and I came back from New York yesterday. And getting out was a bit of a challenge because...

Rain. Ice. Wind. Rain, darling. And I had, yeah, I got, they had flagged my tweets, and it printed them out for me. No, so. The arm.

Yeah, the metal plate in your arm. Disappointingly, not eventful or uneventful. It doesn't go off. Oh, okay. Oh, it was just a cast that got you in trouble last year. Yeah, but I was told at some point, I feel like, that this would be an issue for me. And it wasn't.

No, I don't know if that's because I have pre now. I feel like everything pre is like, yes, we can go ahead. Yeah. No, but I was trying to thread a needle of getting to coach soccer and get to New York for an 8 p.m. show. So I really, there was like one flight I could get on. I was going to go right from soccer to there.

That would put me at the airport in time to go right to the hotel, which is next to where I was going, which was Radio City Music Hall, were our friend and I don't know in some ways exhibit in our legal hearing Akash was head headlining I mean he sold out Radio City musical and it was sold out it's about 6,000 cap damn and uh you know I'm dude I'm pulling in in the car from the airport and you just see it like live Akash saying sold out and my hotel literally was like I don't or 200 yards away.

So the problem was it was raining. So now my flight, the Delta flight I had booked on whatever points or credit, now it's moving, it's moving, and now they're like, you're going to leave it three. Delta, huh? Doesn't ever leave that? I had a credit or something. All right.

And. That's the, oh yeah. That's the acronym. I've never heard that. Well, I learned it in Atlanta, which is their hope. Quite a delay. And one time we missed a full day. of a vacation abroad with my wife and I at the Atlanta airport for like 18 hours.

That's the only time I've probably done deltas when I traveled over there. Yeah. So now I'm scrambling, but Delta's giving me the option of a refund or points back or whatever. So I hit up AA and they had a flight and it was cheap. And it was actually, it was a flight I didn't. So Delta didn't leave the airport. Right. But it was a flight I hadn't considered earlier because I wanted to coach soccer.

But once that's canceled, which it was by about eight, nine, I'm like, boom, let's move. So I got an earlier flight. It put me back a little bit earlier yesterday. Okay, yeah, I was watching the weather for you because I wanted to. Yeah. First of all, I was thinking, do I stop by the soccer game or would that be weird? No, dude. I stopped by the previous week.

I think it's cool. And then if I stop by again, it's like, why is this guy here? My mom loves seeing you. He doesn't have a kid. At some point, you're going to get to experience Carter, which will just make it worth your time. Just being a maniac? So I got out there, I got there on time. You guys remember me telling you that last time I went to New York,

I went in and waited in line for halal for like three hours at a place in Manhattan. It's like a food truck. I mean, I waited forever, dude. And it's right near Radio City Music Hall. So it doesn't open until 6 p.m. So as I was walking to the show, it's like 8. There's already a line that's probably two hours. I'm like, damn, I want it.

I want it so bad, but I don't know if I have it in me tonight because I knew we'd be out late. So we go to the show. How fun was it just to travel alone? It doesn't feel it's too cool to be doing. Like there's some level of guilt to it, but I really enjoyed it. Finding your own car. Like, it just takes a lot away. Yeah.

Just any. Freedom of movement. Oh, I'll stop over here. I'll walk over here. Just everything. It's moving quick, though. The show, he did the set he did here, like he's working on an hour, you know, so I knew most of the jokes. It's incredible, I think, to watch that.

Insane. To watch how it seems like it's all, he's coming up with it right there. Yeah. That's a real skill that stand up. And since this is somewhat of a, when you see the hour, if, you know, you're so inclined when it comes out, the tour is called generational triumph. and not to get too often in the weeds, but we talked about it. It's kind of about generational trauma,

which is something you hear a lot in, like, immigrant family circles. Like, he hasn't talked to his dad in a minute. His dad hit his mom. His dad was an alcoholic, right? And so a lot of, he's trying to get the perspective of, like, what it was like

for his dad to come over here and be in a foreign land. You know, like he was the man over there. He comes over here. It's not like that. How much did that change his perspective? It's a very deep hour. And so that's why I wanted to be there

Because once I saw it in Dallas I was like damn this is going to be like a Simba like the crowning achievement And it was he brought his mom out He brought his wife out He brought his mother-in-law out He brought out like all his whole team at the end Like he finished the set and was like hey

I need five to ten Did a bunch of pictures It was like people were crying Like it was very intense So I was glad I did it for that reason And then I was extra glad when I got my little wristband for the at the Radio City after party. It was like downstairs. Didn't see this part when I went for the Rockettes with the family.

But downstairs there's like an after party room. And what are we got on the table? 100 platters of Adels, the truck outside that people wait two or three out. Oh, the thing that you were waiting. Okay. Yeah. And you know, you guys know me. I'm skittish about like taken from people.

You're happier about that than the show. Dude, I went right for it. And I told his brother, I was like, I don't usually do this. I went to hid, just went to town. And then after, when I talked to Akash later, he was like, I heard you guys, you mentioned it whenever you were reviewing my show. Or when you talked about coming to New York, and he's like, I'm not saying he did it, but it's a famous place. And, you know, he's got to pay for all that. Like, my dad was asking me, you know, what's he taken from that night?

And I'm like, I do, there's so much going on. You're booking, I imagine the venue. Now you got to sell the tickets. You know, when we're at the bar afterward, he's paying for all that. There's a food platter because then we went to a bar next to the place. And there's maybe 40 or 50 people underground bar, all open bar, food everywhere, all of his family and friends and stuff. And I heard the server being like, hey, let them know every X number of dollars.

So it's a full-scale operation, dude. And it was- Were they filming for a special there? No, he's not filming. I mean, I'm sure that they filmed it to some degree, but that's not, he's filming it elsewhere. And I don't think he's said where yet. So, not like it's a big news, but it ain't my job. The calculation is there.

Because, yeah, I know that having it at, not MSG, where was it? Radio City Musical, that's pretty prestigious. It is, but I don't know that. Yeah, and I don't, there are just certain places where you know that, like, you hear comics are like, that's a great place to do it. Just because a place is a great place to do a show, you know, might not mean it's a great place to film something. Just want to let everybody know on my flight home.

The Lady in 25C, someone in her Bible study group got shingles while she was traveling. A lot of concern when she landed because she had 72 point font and she's on a plane. Oh, okay, not loud phone call. I love that. No, but I can't now. I just wanted to read her phone. I have to get a screen blocker. I have to because I just, she's like, oh, shingles, oh, emoji, like the ghost

emoji and I'm like, oh, now I'm worried about her, you know? It's just, it's an overshare. Yeah, then I made it back. I had a great time. It was awesome. That's a baller movement. Wife held it down for the kids for a day. And I slept like nine hours last night.

So I slept zero hours Saturday night, like one to two. What time? So you got up for early flight? Yeah. Damn. Yeah. And then I want to introduce one school yard myth before I pass the baton. This is particularly pertinent right now.

And I don't actually know what the law is. Did you guys hear when you were a kid that you would get arrested if you picked a blue bonnet? Yeah. That's obviously a Texas thing. Yeah, Brian, the guy emailed with a lot, brought that up. And I definitely, like, dude, they'll send you straight to juvie for that. You know, weed eater out there that put you in the chair. We'll tell your wife it's cute to watch the kids for one day.

Here's a guy who watches the kids. Beatin Blake. All alone. Did you say you had a gummy thought too? Let's promote the Early Bird CBD real quick. Sure. Again, we already did mention it's earlybird CBD.com. And then you say 420 is the code for 25% off sitewide.

But they have a new bit too that he wanted to talk about. They got droppers. Yeah, it's like a teacher. What is drops? So maybe you would like to make yourself a little cocktail mocktail, and you want to get the hit of two and a half milligrams of THC, like is in a single gummy. You're a little droppers in here, and you can, you know.

Are you into this, Josh, early bear guy? You're the big winner today then. Give him a drops. No, I'm a big fan of this because I- Congratulations. How about here's a thing of gummies, too? What a big day. Happy birthday.

You're hanging out by the pool, right? You want to make yourself a little something refreshing, a little spritzer. A couple little droppers of this in there. Unflavored, so you can just do whatever you want. So it's just like a gummy? It's like a gummy and that it contains THC for sure. Yeah, that's what I mean. That's what I'm worried about.

It's got you there. And you're worried about paying full price. You won't. Code's 420, early bird CBD.com. Oh, did you ever hear this thing about a penny? Okay. I don't pay full price for sure. All right, Blake.

That's good stuff. So I had a couple birthday parties this weekend. The first... Listener birthday parties. The one on Sunday was, the one on Saturday was not. And I've told you guys for a while that the listener birthday parties are way better. Because we get to skip the whole how you've been, how's work, how's the podcast. It's immediately like, what's Dan like?

It's straight to the party. I'd rather talk about that than... And what is your common answer for that? He's great. Asshole. He's just what you see on TV. The birthday party was in Kaufman, which tells you that there was a mechanical bull at this party.

Oh, nice. How old of us? For a little kid? Brooks did not get on it, but the kids... How old is a kid birthday? So this was a... No, this was a grown-up birthday party. But it was a hoe-down.

Oh, this is your... This is not a listener. Yeah, right. This is family friends. You have not been invited to grown-up up listener birthday parties? Not yet. Okay. Did you take kids? I did. Oh, yeah. Yeah, this is

strictly a time kill operation. So, yeah, the mechanical bull was there. Everyone was in a cowboy hat. They had karaoke. GSI? Does that set your back? We're already trying to get... A mechanical bull at the generic summer event. That'd be cool.

I don't know that it would. Better than a selfie station. Oh, well. Okay. You spent money on that. Very lowest bar. The guy that brought the speakers and all that kind of stuff and set up the karaoke had to do the first song.

And I thought that was extremely lame. Don't you think that's how they get people into it? Yeah, somebody has to do it, dude. I know. And if you have that equipment, you probably love to karaoke. And that's, yeah, I was going to say that's the hardest part of his job. But it's probably the whole part of it. Yeah.

people go up there and already put their name on the list. I don't know if he had to hit lead off or not, though. That does change things a little bit. I'll break the eyes. Okay, I'll do it. On a neon moon. I mean, he's killing it. He's good at it.

Was it all country stuff? Yeah. I've done neon moon before at karaoke. They did line dancing. It was a good time for those that wanted to have a good time. I did have a first down of the day, though, at this party. Excellent. The first down of the day.

So these are kind of... First down. All right. That is the... We got a drop. Do you remember the Southern Bell ref? Who could forget? First down.

A penalty. If you get free breakfast at a hotel you're not staying at, that's a first down. Yeah. Anytime. I told you guys this story off the air, but I'll tell it here. I had a big German Shepherd, and life took me into... had to live in an apartment. This apartment complex wanted, like,

an astronomical amount of money per month to have a dog in it. So my fix was to get her signed up as a self-help dog. So I had to do a telehealth appointment with this doctor to convince him I was depressed and I needed a dog. So that the dog could live with me for free. That's excellent. So you could have taken that dog on a plane and everything? Yeah.

It was like a, what do you call it? Service animal. Registered as my service animal. This 80 pound German shepherd. And did your landlord buy it? I don't think they have a choice. I had the paperwork. You just got a piece of paper and here it is.

I'm a doctor. The real acting came with the doctor. Boy, I wish I had that video where he was talking to the doctor. Yeah. And so I put on like I'm real sad. Hey man, this dog needs a lot to me. Emo Blake. He's got makeup on.

Like is that? I've heard from me. people, you've gone through depression, right? Sure. People that have had that, like, it's not like I'm just sad. No. So, like, yes. But a guy like, Blake pretending I have depression, it's like, I don't know, man.

But someone on the outside looking in. My culture's not your costume. Anyway, the dog live with me for free, first down. We love it. Move those sticks. My one from the party was all the tables were decorated, had his picture. on it in a cowboy hat. Well, they had all these mints.

This is the adult. Yeah. He turned 60. 60? No. Picture. I wouldn't do it, but I can at least see. Yeah, and I think in the interest of being fair and balanced,

given that I'm assuming the leanings of these folks at the ballot box, that's why Hillary lost. If you're a 60-year-old man and you're having people, you're not stopping people from printing out pictures of you and putting them on place sets, you might as well be listening to NPR. Like, that's horrible, dude. Imagine what would my grandfather say? Is 100 okay?

It's like your living funeral. Yeah. I don't think you need you. What are you a realtor? I don't think you need the picture. Everybody knows what you look like. They're there. They're there for you.

What are we doing? It's a common thing at weddings now. I don't understand it. Can I take a time out real quick just to you say, what are you a realtor? Realtors have a new bit going on because I was doing a weekend walk, stopped at an open house, told her I'm not really interested in buying, so she proceeded to give me a hard sell.

So they give me the piece of paper. It's like a 2,000 square foot house, but they wanted a million dollars because they had an acre. And the house was horrible, right? Full fixer up her. You have to just tear this thing down. But she convinced me also you could. just fix it up a little bit. It would be nice.

But so she gave me the thing, the piece of paper that says a million on top and then the square foot and all that kind of stuff. And it had beautiful pictures of the interior. It had the exterior. And then the interior was like, it looked like this place that we're at now. Like, I was just in there. And she goes, oh, that's an AI rendering of what it could look like. If I'm like, oh, okay.

Well, here's a dick pick of what, uh, this is what it comes. could look like now. Dude, it's... It certainly doesn't. It's big on LinkedIn. Really? Almost everyone's profile. I don't know almost everyone.

I just know a lot of people on LinkedIn use AI, and you just kind of have to live with it. I mean, when we listed our house for the World Cup, we didn't use AI necessarily to make the house look nicer. And I think we provided both these, but we did show what it would look like if there were two beds in the kid's room. Like there's a kid bed in there and it looks. Yeah. But I think she actually used AI Photoshop to show like these beds could fit in this room. But, you know, what are you going to do? So the party, he's got the play sets, but also around it where the AI headshot, mints, like the little white mint you get at the restaurants on your way out or what have you. A lot of time in the car,

Brooks is just bored and wants gum or candy or just something. And so I've really gotten him into peppermints. And so I saw an opportunity here to... I've really gotten him into peppermines. Just here's a peppermint. Because apparently they can't have tic tacks. They'll choke. Okay.

He doesn't... Tick-tack? It's a thing. It's so small. You can't choke on a tick. The peppermint is what you'll choke on. I don't know. This is where having a nurse wife doesn't help.

Okay. She's seen. Yeah. All the things she's seen. That's why you always have the flared base. Gum doesn't do well. It's either getting swallowed or stuck in your car somewhere. So a mint is like a happy medium.

And also, to reference another myth, it'll live in your digestive tract for the next eight to ten years. Right. Right. Each table had about ten of these mints and I scooped all of them. Excellent. Excellent. First down. I loaded all of my pockets with these mints.

They were free and they might have gone in the trash can. But now my center console in my car, I've got mints for the next six months. Gosh, that's good. Because, you know, nobody's... What he's not thinking is today it's going to be... 200 degrees. Yeah, they're all going to be one... It's the white chalky one.

One blob mint. I think those are mostly good on melting. I think you're fine. Yeah. Yeah, and this is a good one because nobody's missing those mints. No. There's no real loser here. There's no victim.

That's great. Yeah. Good for you. The next day did have a listener birthday party who did warn me ahead of time. It's a dude perfect birthday. I said, okay, I can let that go because I need some help. So we went to the place. I was at a gymnastics place.

And what does this mean, though, if you have a dude perfect themed birthday, what are we doing? So your gift bag that you take home is dude perfect themed. The cake is dude perfect themed. The birthday boy had a dude perfect shirt on. So just little things here and there. There's no games, did you say? In the gift bag there were. And I had a really proud moment with Brooks

because in the gift bag was a can of Pringles with like a stick and a piece of paper on it that serves as a backboard because also in the bag is a ping pong ball. So you eat the Pringles and then what do you? You got a little game of basketball you can play. Apparently this is due perfect. It makes sense.

Okay, since you brought this up, I had a quick moment yesterday as they were unpacking the groceries where I saw a bag of chips that got me really excited. And I'll tell you why. Because it was a Doritos Ruffles crossover event. And my daughter had picked out a bag of ruffles that were cool ranch Dorito flavored. And a big win for me is that those stayed unopened until it was time to make lunch this morning. I was super pumped. I actually looked at him and go, whoa.

And my wife was like, what? What do you, then I look, dude, and it's, it's dude perfect. They're in charge of the crossover? Yeah. Yeah, they're right there on the top of the bag. Would you trade portfolios with Tyler from Dude Perfect? That's the dumbest question you've ever asked me. I just thought you'd want to remain humble.

Yeah, I mean, and it's apparently impossible to do so when you get that kind of money, judging by how they carry themselves. Oh. My proud moment was Brooks saw that can't have. cringles and this thing on it and just ripped it, ripped the backboard, had no time for Dude Perfects games. Good. And then we had softball yesterday out at the yard.

What's the name of your team again? The Cardinals? Yeah. We had a rough Sunday. But it could have been because of this. So between our games, we had to move fields and two police officers walk up to our dugout. Come up to one of my teammates and say, hey, someone hit your truck in the parking lot. And we're thinking it wouldn't be with a softball that's not a police issue.

Maybe a hit and run. Someone backed him to his car. I don't know. Come to find out, they came up and arrested a guy that I play softball with. Oh, they were lying to him? That was how they got him out to the parking lot. Oh, you did say it was a bit of a rag-tag group this season. Rewind the tape.

Do you know what he was arrested for? No. the people in the know are being real snobby about it not saying anything but judging so we have five we we play eight through one or the game started eight they go through one o'clock so in between games you have people coming in for the next games and we were hearing from them dude we saw there were police on every exit on every entrance and exit of the parking lot of the fields they were unmarked cars in the parking lot they were surrounding his vehicle no small uh did he play in any of the games He played in the first game and...

What kind of sticker we lose him? We didn't miss much in the second. Ooh. No, he's fine. It was nuts. And then during the game, we see them tow his truck. This is a major offense. That's crazy.

And no, I mean, it seems like a normal person. I don't... No idea what it could be for. But you really want to know, though. I, yeah, I really want to know. I mean, trying to search his name. I might ask Jason from the internet what he could find. That's the guy.

Wild scene. But a little hat tip to Alan PD. They came and got him before the game started, so we didn't have to take the automatic out. That's just community policing. Would the other team have been a stickler about that, you think? Of course. Yeah.

Of course. So shout out to them. Yeah. But yeah, so they're walking up and they, okay, we got to get them out to the parking lot somehow. What can we come up with? Like, is it? They got to come up with a lie?

Oh, yeah. I mean, I wonder, there's got to be some level of law on how far they're allowed to go. But if you also kind of know you're wanted, like certainly if that many police are after you. And that's what we're saying. This guy knows. Why are you playing softball if you're wanted? That's a really good question, just at its basic level. And had they been following him long enough?

Like, they knew exactly where it was. They knew what field he was at. Well They knew his schedule Yeah you would think Well yeah Did they want to get up late Or did they just find out

And they let them play the first game Yeah Like let's see what kind of I was gonna say like Immediately when you said two people Should have known something was up Because it doesn't take two I knew right away

When you said two cops came on the field Yeah It wouldn't have been It's just been one cop If somebody hit his car He should have been like Why are there two? I wonder if they would try to arrest him

In the dugout Like why is that Get him at the plate They just don't want him to see it. Yeah, why don't wait till he comes out? In an hour? Or just arrest him in the dugout. Just say, I'm arresting you.

I think they didn't want to cause a scene. Or does he have, like, family there? No, but, like, Brooks is there. Luckily, he didn't really catch what was going on. But, yeah, that was the first. The teammate got arrested. Listen, that's extremely softball, right? that's not that's not that's not happening at tennis practice well who knows i don't know probably not

at pickleball yeah but all right all right well let's get to sports today sports brought to us bribe community mechanical our hvac company i believe they will be out there if not tomorrow then wednesday i have some preventative maintenance scheduled from community mechanical That's one of those other things that I kind of said it and forget it, but signed up for the preventative maintenance. They came. They found some stuff that was wrong. But then it's like six months later, they kind of call you or text you and like, hey,

when's a good time? Okay, so they're going to come out again. They're going to replace the filters and whatnot. And we invite you to sign up for that preventative maintenance. If you do, get a free Dumb Zone T-shirt. Or what did they give you? They will give you $50 in Dumb. zone merch.

Oh, okay, nice. And if you do the full change out, you'll get yourself a sit-in. But what you're really going to get, no matter what, is good service, honest service. Brandon Aubrey, he was only able to stay so focused that he could get a $20 million guarantee because he knew that his HVAC situation was handled by community. $20 million dollar guarantee, huh? 469-66727290 CommunityDFW.com. Travis and the team real cool

You don't want your house to explode Don't be a bitch So pick up the phone Dan almost died From the wonderful world of sports Radio sports Scoreboard Oh yeah, I like that

Here's my overarching sports Gummy thought for the day I'm very excited about the NFL draft We'll be streaming live at 7 It'll be an emmerich front Cowboys have currently two first-round picks. My sports gummy thought is,

is this like a one-year aberration, or is the reason that they're not, like, guys that you feel rock-solid are going to be likely every year borderline all pro players, you've got five to ten of them in every draft, they play the best positions, is the reason we don't have those because of, the portal. Is it because, to some extent,

NIL fuels the portal? But like they were talking about Mansour Delane, right? He's a corner out of LSU that is projected to go pretty high. He may be the Cowboys pick. If they could somehow get him at 12, people would be thrilled. But he played, he had one good year at LSU. And he, because he was there for one year, right?

So guys are going to move around. case he spent a couple years at Votech. But just in general, are there going to be fewer guys used to, like when you drafted Trayvon Diggs, even he, who I believe came out early, had like three seasons of coaching with Nick Saban. He was at camp, at practice, every single. That was even guys who were awesome, the typical route, unless you were a quarterback, was you went to a school, you bawled the F out, and you became Julio Jones. You became any number of these guys who were just dogs, right?

Most of them didn't transfer much. Like, in the case of quarterbacks, maybe, because we talk about how many attempts you need, and there's a lot of guys who get lost in the shuffle and become fifth-year grad transfers or whatever. But if you look at the draft this year, there aren't the guys that you feel like are awesome. There's just not.

Is it just a down year? Or are we losing the five-star or four-star who goes to a badass college for three to four years, red shirts or doesn't, but they come out after three years, they started for two, but that other year they were getting coached by one coach, and then you feel great about them.

And are they any worse now, or is it just your confidence in them is worse? And I kind of think quarterbacks is separate a deal, but it is sort of part of it. Maybe that second thing. I don't know, quarterbacks, though, I think you would feel much better if they're in the same system for three years.

there are years where there's just a down quarterback year in the draft, right? I've seen that a million times. One every five years. But even if Arch is, like, rated below other quarterbacks for other certain reasons, don't you think they're going to add in, hey, wait, though, he was there for three years, same coach, pro-style offense. That's got to mean something. Sure.

They're going to at least. It'll be tough to tease out with the fact that he's a manning. Yeah, and he's also very talented. able to figure that out. But I do think it says a lot about, you know, there are plenty of guys who have families who are very wealthy who still make very financially driven decisions that Arch didn't make. But in any case, I'm sure he's still fine. He's fine. Like he's getting a million dollars, right? A million, but Sark flat out said this weekend, he's like, he's saving me five million because I'd have to be paying him six or seven.

But it just overall, you look at the, it's not just the quarterbacks. Like there is no guy this year as a wide receiver that you're like, damn, takeover. There's no Miles Garrett, you know. Now, Micah became Micah. He wasn't Micah in the draft. But so that does a couple things. One, it just makes me wonder, right? But two, in practice in effectively, it means there are a lot of teams really like three through

eight, maybe even two, I don't know, three through eight that want to move down because they don't want to spend a pick up there on one of those positions when they're bad because they think they need a lot of players and they don't, it's not getting an edge. Why do I want to spend the fifth overall pick on a linebacker or a guard, you know? So there's a lot of teams up there that might not want to use that pick up top. And then you've got Dallas on the other end. Now, if there are a lot of teams doing that, can you actually get good value then? That's the idea, is that the cost to move up this year may be lower than it's been in years past because of that lack of top-end talent. So it would make – this is where my, like, you know, logical approach conflicts with my cowboy fandom approach.

because there's really no logical world where you could say that a defense that bad coming away with anything other than two starters in the first round is a good idea. You need it so bad. You have four spots, four rooms really in your defense. Linebacker, Edge, or excuse me, linebacker's safety and corner could all be upgraded.

I saw some stat. Edge is being mentioned. Was it Albert Breyer? Somebody put a stat out that it was a drive started in opponent's territory last year. And Jacksonville led the NFL with 30. And I didn't know that was. You see where Dallas was? Very last nine.

Yeah. With Turpin. Yeah. Yeah, you can look like. But that's just the defense too, right? It's not just special teams. He's saying it should be, if you have Turpin in a competition. to defense, you should be top five to ten in that stat every year.

But yeah, it was bad, you drive, average starting drive, length of plays, everything was terrible. So that being said, trading up and getting one player out of the first round when you don't have a second seems very dicey. Now, if you can get back into the second and you only end up getting a defender in the top ten, and then you've got a second round pick to do something else, maybe you're okay there. but I'd love them to get a safety. I'd love them to go get a dog.

That's what I want as a fan. But how can you really sell the idea that this team should be in like go get one guy mode? When you don't have any starting linebackers, you have one starting corner. It's a tough sell. We don't make it a fun night, though. I think it's more likely that they move up in this draft than it has been in a very long time. What do you think the Dexter Lawrence trade means? for the Cowboys.

A couple things. It means that... Dexter Lawrence traded from the Giants to the Bengals. Yeah. For the 10th overall pick. I think maybe the first time since Randy Moss. That a top 10 pick was traded, yes, right before the draft. And it was straight up for a player.

Yeah. Mosses might even have had another pick in it, but that's been a long time. You don't see that. It's funny reading about the 70s or whenever, when they used to do it all the time. God, dude. You could trade the number one overall for, like, a couple guys. And that's why Draft Day is set in, like, 1973, right? No, it's actually set a couple years ago.

Yeah, it's very outdated. But I think what it does is it puts another team in front of Dallas that might need offensive help. Defensive. No, I think that they can get defense and offense now. Like, if the Giants are in front of you and you're like, oh, they're going to take a deal. but they just traded Dexter Lawrence. Yeah, but I still think there's, like, they get linked to Jeremiah Love a lot. Now, he might go to Carolina as four.

I don't think it's horrible. I think it pushes players down that Dallas might be interested in. Because obviously Cincinnati was 100% defense. Yes. Okay, so you're just not sure. You're not sure. What are the Giants? I mean, there have been some receivers mocked to them.

Malik Neighbors is awesome, but he was hurt. And I think we're seeing now, if you want to get a young quarterback to ball, you've got to have two receivers that you feel good about. So I think it's not bad. I don't think it's bad at all. I think it might be bad if you think John Harbaugh gets in his bag and is good at what he does. He's definitely in a unique situation, right?

He has more control right now than he's ever had in his life. Oh, for sure. So the sheen is either... Which is interesting. About to be off or the glow up will occur because people are going to figure out how much being in Baltimore for personnel. Right.

It's Tomlin like. Sure. What was it? The Brandon Aubrey contract. What does he get guaranteed? 20. 20 million. And previous to that, he was just guaranteed this year, which would have been five and a half or whatever.

And then, which, because I wanted to talk Brandon Aubrey before he signed this, just because there was, I thought an unfair, maybe this is the state always can control the message or the team can always control the message? Because Calvin Watkins had an article out this weekend that just talks about, because Friday was the last day that if the Cowboys didn't receive any an offer sheet by Friday, then there was no, hey, they might get a second rounder for Brandon Aubrey. No one else bid on Brandon Aubrey,

which we told you the second this story came out. This is a fake thing. No one bids for another team's player and then gives up draft picks. It just doesn't happen. You tell me nobody. Very rare. Nobody put up an offer for T.J. Bass either. Was T.J. Bass offered a...

Yes, he was the second round Tinder, wasn't he? Yeah. It happens a lot. It never happens on the other end, right? It doesn't happen. You're right. Anyway, so this is what got me upset. And as the lead guys on Brandon Aubrey's PR team, I think we should be by this.

Because Calvin Watkins just wrote, last year, Cowboys officials offered Aubrey the largest average salary for a kicker. It's just under $7 million per season. Aubrey's representatives asked for $10 million per season. And that's just written as fact. That's it. That's how now everybody can perceive Brandon Aubrey

as a guy just asking for $10 million a season. And the Cowboys, because they're so benevolent, we're like, hey, how about the highest paid, you know, salary for a kicker in history? By $100,000. But you never really see the details either. Right, right, guarantees. Was it $12 million guaranteed on that one?

Years. Also, we probably made this point at the time, and I told you guys a story about Philip, but I don't know. It's odd to me that there are so many people that are involved in business that get really mad. when they see how the, I mean, that's negotiating. So if he said, if they wanted to end up at a little over seven or eight or something

and they come in and say, here's 6.5, what are you supposed to say? I told you the way it was. Yeah. It was that they offered him something that looked shiny and you look beneath the surface and it was fake gold. It was, it was the years, it was whatever it was. It was something they knew he would not accept unless. I got a guy here was kicking for like the XFL like two years ago.

Maybe he'll just be like, hey, actually, let me take 12 million guaranteed. I could have dreamed of having 12 million ever offered to me guaranteed. His agent, though, is an actual guy who works in the NFL a long time. And he's like, okay, if you're going to start here, then we're going to start at 10 million. It was probably a sarcastic type, hey, let's get real talks going. and then it got reported as such. As cowboy highest paid, uh,

mean agent demands 10 million. Well, you know how this goes though. But, but the reporters don't have to report it, the bullshit. They, they could definitely do it differently,

but I always wonder, you know, that's the problem with the whole set up. Then do they not get their access with the cowboys again? Yeah. If they're going to actually be word by word, actually what's true, uh,

well, maybe you don't get, uh, the first question anymore, Calvin. Yeah. That is literally how it works. But you know how this goes, though.

And it's odd to me because I've typically been a person in my life that has a hard time letting go of grudges and being besmirched. But this stuff just goes away. Yeah. I mean, the only one I can think of is like Emmett. Emmett is still pissed, but Jerry will act like it never happened. And for the Cowboys from the team side, if he's getting 20 million guaranteed, and he's averaging $7 million a year, Harrison Butker's guarantee was 15. Next up was Fair Baron at 116.

That's a huge win for him. And listen, here's what's hard about being Brandon Aubrey. He's a kicker. It could go, right? It will go at some point. But if he's good for another two years, then that's not a bad thing for the Cowboys. You know, that's $10 million a year to have the best kicker ever. That's going to come in handy.

So even if it's only two years and maybe something in. Who knows? In all likelihood, he's good for another three or four years, and then it's the next deal. But I don't know. It's hard to predict if you're a kicker. Like, turning down that money last year, obviously was the smart economic decision.

But if just a few random things go wrong, that's a lot of betting on yourself, man. You're not a regular player. I'd bet on them. Oh, I'd bet on it too, but I still think there's a reality if you're a team of the, it's very hard to predict the curve. Like, for example, I read a study the other day.

Defensive tackles are peaking and playing way later than they used to. So when you look at a guy like Quinn and Williams and you're like, God, he's already like almost 30. I don't even know how old he is. He's probably 28. Those guys are, think about like Vince Wilfork. And that's anecdotal, but there's a bunch of them. Like those inside One Tech monsters, they've been playing until they're almost

you know, late 30s. You could try to predict these things. Like where do these guys who have these type of bodies, these routes, this production, how do they portrayal off? With a kicker, dude, it's anybody's guess. Yeah.

It's just a massive gamble all the way around. But good for him, dude. That's awesome. I have a couple of other quick sports things. Robert Kraft tried to kill the Vrable story, no way. That's a big thing this morning Is it the New York? Like previous to the story ever getting out?

Because you know, he's Robert Kraft. He's got people at the New York Post. He's a Trump guy. They can get stuff in there. So I heard they didn't have him on their pre-draft press conference. They didn't. Which is interesting. Yeah.

Now, it's going to be tough to hide this week. Yeah. But yeah, he didn't do it. Cowboys pre-draft press conference, by the way, is Wednesday at 1130. Damn it. Well, we can either do an emergency. Let's just do it at the exact same time, or we'll... Just run it, comment, mystery shoddy theater 3,000.

No, or we could do that, or we could just, you know, cut it up for Thursday, which probably what we'll do. But the Diana Rossini thing with Rabel, too. So I found out she's a voter for the NFL awards. And there's only 50 voters. So this is where things. can come into play because some players have clauses. This isn't very, it's not like the NBA, but like Josh Allen would have got, I think, a $1.5 million bonus had he won MVP the year that she voted for Lamar over Josh Allen.

And like it was, that was 2024, I think. I promise you there are coaches with similar incentives. Yeah. Think of it. And Vrabel won coach of the year last year. Vrabel won coach of the year by a good amount. Let's see. 19 first place votes.

Liam Cohen got 16 first place votes. But the thought is, though, what if she took the consensus second place person and gave them 10th place on her ballot? Because you know it's weighted? Like, let's say Stafford won MVP by one vote, was it? I don't recall. I don't know that story.

Very close to Drake May. So it's kind of moot because Stafford won the MVP. But that's kind of the kind of case too that could she have voted Drake May number one and Stafford 10th? That's mildly. It's interesting to me to think about the implications, but we're also, we're focusing on her because this is in the news, when really this should be a focus of all of this. if you wanted to because it's just like the Clarence thing. How is it possible that there are people responsible for voting for something

that is financially incentive base for these people when their relationship with them depends on them being nice to them and being cordial with them and being perceived as not an enemy or a threat? I mean, that's the NBA thing. It always drove me crazy because I'm like, well, this is why these guys hate us. Yeah, like definitely she's voting for able, right? because 2024, the AP doesn't usually release the voters or the votes, but for some reason they did.

And then they didn't last year. But now people are reaching out to them like saying, hey, what if you, let's release those votes now. Let's take a look at how she voted them. You're never going to have a situation where, like, anybody thinks it's weird for, like, I'm not, David's as a guy I know, but David voting for, if David voted for Jerry for Executive of the Year. And David knew well before everyone else about this secret kid and this or that,

but that's not what I'm reporting because that's not what this is about. Yeah, but secret key. I'm just saying like the idea that you can't burn somebody. Yeah. And that influences your vote of them. I'm just saying I think it's a matter of degrees. This one is sexy. Yeah.

And it's sultry. But you're right. Yeah. You're right. Because you could still get retribution if you didn't. vote the right way. And I feel like that happens. This is a weird thing, too.

This got released, I think it was Friday. Maybe it was during the show. Page 6, another page 6, Diana Rusini store. Did you see it? Now that you mention it, I did see there was a video. The headline is, mounted a daring rescue of an elderly man and his dog from an overturned Jeep. There's not a video.

Really? There are pictures. Okay, maybe I just saw like that. This overturned Jeep. Yeah. Because if there's a video, we could then verify some of these things because there's conflicting reports that 5 p.m. last Wednesday, a 17-year-old driving a Honda Civic turned onto a street in New Jersey, collided with a Jeep, flipped the four-by-four onto its side.

Diana Rusini runs out. A tall man put her on top of the Jeep to open the door. She and the other man pulled the driver and his dog out of the Jeep. So after that report was published, someone else comes forward and says actually there was a guy who reached that car before Dan and Rusini ever got there he pulled the guy out Rusini basically kind of helped with the dog Okay

Something to be sad There was a dog involved yeah so She walked up and said I spoke to the man in sight during the accident He said he's going to try to not wreck in the second half Back to you. Yeah, it feels like a PR somehow plant.

I don't know. I don't believe anything. Right? Like there's 100% a guy who if you gets into some shit, they're like, all right, I can get you saving a dog in the next week for five grand. That's awesome. That's got to be. There's got to be a crisis comms guy that's like, how do you want to do this?

What can we do? Like, let's see the, do you go to levels of believability? Right. Yeah, you got to, here's a special needs kid over here. Okay, let's go to an obscure neighborhood in New Jersey. Right. A car turns over, you just kind of help the guy get out. The car doesn't blow up or anything. You're not in danger.

That's believable. That's pretty good. But it's positive. I have a guy. You don't think that there are guys who are ex-military who know how to roll a Jeep and live through it. Like, yeah, there's some risk involved, but that's their job. Like, damn. I promise you that exists.

I promise you at some level. And so it's kind of like us with like promoting something on YouTube. 5,000 for Diana Rusini's not that much. She's like, well, let's just try. Let's see. I don't know. Maybe it'll work. I don't know.

Very little downside. Very little. That's awesome. I have a BS of the day. Oh, okay, good. I didn't do much baseball this weekend. This is my baseball. First of all, my baseball.

Dude, you can't, you're in the bathroom at Radio City. You're going to get five guys in there. Let's go Yankees. Dude, everyone's so Yankee. It's so annoying. Sorry, what do you got? First of all, let's just promote Game Day men's health. We're not in the studio.

But it's gameday.dumzone.com. Had to go before I got out of town. I would imagine that helps you for the weekend, right? Yeah. Get a little boost. It's helping me be my best me. I know it sounds silly, but that really is it. Like, you can't be you how you want to be if you're in a bad mood,

if you're tired, if you're upset. pissed off all the time. Those are the things that come with low T. Don't forget the two favorite locations today. The Northeast Frisco location on Coyt just south of 380 across from Rock Hill High School and then the Plano location, the Medical Building on the northeast corner of Preston Spring Creek, Caddy Corner to H.E.B. That's our two highlighted... Rock Hill High School? You don't know? Friscoe Rock Hill.

Unbelievable. They're new. Blue Hens. Okay. But anyway, if you've never even had your testosterone level checked, it's free. Go to Game Day Men's Health. And then if you get the TRT replacement or anything at Game Day Men's Health, mention the dumb zone.

You get 10% off for life. Blue Hawks. You can even start the first treatment before leaving, if you want, on your first visit. About 15 minutes, you'll get the results from your rapid testosterone test. So, yeah. gameday. Dumbzone.com. My baseball.

One thing is a W-H-L, but it is a tweet from Evan Grant, which was put out on Friday, which you guys certainly saw, but it was tonight in Seattle, we will get to see. Mariners TV reporter Angie Mentick, Tink, Tink.

Who is first class in an absolute warrior? And people on this hellhole trying to drag her down. Man, come on. Yeah. She, of course, is the TV reporter who was Googling, or was it like chat GP, whatever, Googling. Chat GPT. AI is a, I feel like an important part of this.

For whatever reason. Questions to players after a tough baseball loss or something like that, right? But anyway. But then we subsequently found. out that she had recently had a stroke, had been through some medical issues and was just getting back to work. Some people were white knighting over that. But, you know, I told Blake in text that we should have a video of us calling it. I mean, it was right down the pipe, as they say. And they happen to be playing the Mariners, like right after that story.

It could have been six months from now. Okay. The next time that was locked and loaded. And that's, you know. And then we've had some ABS stuff that I hadn't anticipated before. What was the one? A few weeks ago, there was something that came up. I had one that I, well, go ahead. I'm sorry. Well, I can't remember the one.

So I'm glad you're. Because as soon as I said it, I realized the one I had was pitch clock related. But I never brought this up on the show, and it was something that I'd never thought about. But McKenzie Gore gave up, it was about a week ago. He gave up a shot on a two-strike count. and he said afterward, because I was watching it, he ran out of time and threw a pitch. He just freaked out kind of.

He's like, I should, maybe there was one strike. Because he was like, I should have just taken another strike. But the clock, something in the communication, and he threw like a hurried pitch, and it was like they lost, that was like a game winning run. I mean, the bullpen obviously is involved, but nobody's going nine.

But you know what I mean? Like, that's an unintended consequence. Of the clock, yeah. Of the clock. I can't remember a couple weeks ago. I remember. Oh, it was the strike them out thing or the ball four. So, yeah, if runners are going, it's called ball four, runner gets second.

What if it, yeah, the strike them out. There's like a reasonably should have thought involved in the rule. Which is always dangerous. Sure. So here's an ABS today. it was the White Sox Eger Quero is a catcher. Jeff McNeil is up to bat

for the A's I believe. And so there's a pitch called a ball. Low pitch, called a ball. Quiro does the catcher. He's trying to frame it, right? Pull it up. Hate that. But it was pretty close. Called a ball. Quero immediately

taps his helmet. Ump doesn't see it. The batter thinks it was a ball. Saw the catcher do that and he starts yelling at the hump. Hey, he called, he challenged it. I'm not challenging it.

He challenged it. And so the ump's like, no he didn't. I didn't. And the catcher's like, what? That's awesome. Because now... He's confused about why the batter wants. So the ump goes and gets the other.

and they're like, yeah, we saw them challenge it. So they do the ABS, it's actually a ball. It's actually a ball. Yeah, that's fun. I thought it was fun that it's like, hey, hey, no, no, no, I want them to challenge it. I saw him challenge it. He can't take it back now. Like, he must have realized right then.

Yeah. Like, oh, man, actually that was low. I shouldn't, like. You're going to get some, somebody will make fun of you. Probably, maybe in his head somewhere was every time in the past, when I pull up this, you know, from right there, that's tricked them. He just called it a ball. Let's do it again.

Oh, wait. God damn. I forgot the framing doesn't work anymore. Yeah. I have one more story for you on sports front, but let's do it on the other side. Okay. George Tootweed. Absolutely George Tootweed.

Are you kidding me, man? He grew fields of that stuff, man. That's what I'm talking about. It feels. He grew that shit up. Mount Vernon, man. Mount Vernon, man. He grew it all over the country, man.

He had people growing it all over the country, you know? The whole country back then was getting hot. Let me tell you, man, because he knew he was on to something, man. He knew that it would be a good cash crop for the southern states, man. So he grew fields of it, man. But you know what? Behind every good man, there's a woman. And that woman was Martha Washington, man.

And every day George would come home, she'd have a big, fat bull waiting for him, man, when he'd come in the door, man. the hip, hip, hip, lady. And she was real cool, too. She'd harvest the crops, man. That's what I'm talking about. She'd put in the, in the bushels and stuff and sell it, you know,

because they had to, you know, make ends meet and stuff. I mean, did you ever look at a dollar bill, man? There's some spooky stuff going on on a dollar bill, man. I mean, and it's green, too. You're listening to The Dumb Zone. See, I wanted to promote. The Dumb Zone, generic, Summer events, Saturday, June 6th.

Mark your calendar, putting in your palm pilot. Four Corners Brewery, 6 p.m. And it is brought to you by our title sponsor, Community Mechanical. All right, we have a... Whoa. Damn. It's a crunchy stuff, boy. Emergency today in Twitter, I believe.

The Dumbzel presents today and Twitter. Brunig is back at it. Yeah. He quote tweets the ESPN tweet about Brandon Aubrey becoming the highest paid kicker in NFL history. Matt Brunick tweets, Rare Miss from GM Jones. Kickers aren't very important in the modern NFL

due to the fourth down revolution. It's the perfect Bruning tweet because there's a kernel of seriousness in it that he could probably debate and win on. He knows that this is going to play very, very angrily in our audience, which follows him heavily. Is there a lot of comments already? Yeah. Going with rare miss from GM Jones to set the whole thing up.

I mean, he was the executive of the year in like 2016. The Cowboys that won a lot of games. I think he's two-time. GM of the year, if I'm not mistaken. Someone pulled the number of field goals attempted the average of the NFL. He says it stayed consistent. Yeah. Just, oh, people trying to use stats to argue again?

Yes. It won't work, yeah. And, you know, he's right. A kicker, for the most part, is less important now than they've ever been. But there's some. Punters for sure. Yeah. Well, kickers, I mean, it's still kickers are, I mean, they're not not important.

They're just less important than they used to. be. You're just not scoring points that way as much. And of course, there are people that would make the argument that having Aubrey makes the Cowboys less aggressive on fourth down. But he also changes a coach who's predisposition for that. But he also changes the math of the game in major ways. But it's a fun thing to watch. The confidence of being able to throw him out there at a 60-yarder? Yeah. Like a 60-yarder in normal times was like, I don't know, 50% maybe.

Maybe we'll get it, maybe we won't. Let's try, though. It's our last. Like, they don't even, it's not their last gasp. It's like, oh, okay, 60-yarder, cool. Let's go do it. Just run them out there. Second quarter, there he is.

My other today and Twitter note was a story I saw taking off over the weekend. Our buddy Ethan Strauss wrote about it. Oh, is it A-Z? No. Oh, okay, because I forgot to talk to you about AZ-Fud. Go on. We will have plenty of time before next week's draft. Nike put out an ad near the store they have closest to where the Boston Marathon is taking place.

And they put up a sign. As soon as you said, it made me start thinking of funny bomb. related signs Nike could have done. This one, not bomb related at all. Okay. Boss strong, baby. No, it says, runners welcome, walkers tolerated.

Which is kind of a dope sign. Like, as our buddy Jordan Rogers broke down on his Instagram, he used to work at Nike. This is like in line with the Nike that we all grew up and fell in love with, which is like, this is for fucking psychopath athletes. Like, this is for Michael Jordan, Tiger Woods, Kobe Bryant. this is for, hey, the LeBron ad they did for the Olympics said something like, winning isn't for everyone.

And that's like the last divisive ad they've done. You know, they would do like gold is for winners. You lose, or you win gold, you lose second. Nike's whole thing, my whole life, and I fall for it is like, this is not for regular. And of course it is. But they position it like, it's for bad asses. And so this sign is that. Like, it's the Boston Marathon.

We're not here for slow people. Like, this is not about... Yeah. And then, as Ethan said, they received backlash from POWs, people of walk. And they literally, eventually, took down this ad because it was... There's some people that, like, 20% of the Boston Marathon is, like, charity runners. And they're going to walk part of the race. And in general, just like saying to people who can't run, you're not...

welcome because you're you're slow you're a walker they took it down to which George's point is like this is your mistake your mistake is not that you made this ad you made this ad and you know let it let the whatever excuse me yeah quote backlash it's all fake it's all online right if there was backlash you just live with that we did it this is it and then the backlash might end up being story But yes, now this... I don't know, dude. Now you think less of Nike, though.

I think you have to give in to the pace shaming. You definitely think less of Nike. And if you know anything about the stuff... You're saying you should have taken it down? No. I just wanted to let you know that they're using the word pace shaming. They are? Oh, yeah.

Like that P-O-W thing was real? The P-O-W thing was Ethan. You made that... Oh, Ethan. But pace shaming is something that people... This is pace shaming. It's abelist to people that can't run. They can only walk.

I mean, we all do it. When we're driving by the fat guy or the fat lady, in our head, we know, hey, at least they're out there doing something. But I'm also like, should you be doing it that slow? He's bringing this up because T.C.'s parents or dad makes fun of his score. I totally forgot about that, to be honest with you. So you are into pace shaming. Yeah.

Or he's against it. The, uh, yeah, I mean, he likes the humiliation. I like, that is true. Both sides here. Do it to me. Do it to me. I'll run slower. No, but I mean, this is if you know anything about the stuff that Ethan has written about Nike.

And it's controversial and it gets people mad online, I guess. But this is how he diagnosed their downfall. And as Jordan says, if you try to be everything to everyone, you're nothing to anyone. That's kind of the brand thing. You have to plant your flag somewhere to be like, oh, this is cool because it's not for everyone. Nike stock price today is a third of what it was when Ethan wrote the article five years ago. Because that's when he wrote the article, people are like, look at his stock price. I think they're doing fine with their marketing lesbians, okay?

Well, now they're not. Was that initial article around the time, like when they weren't putting out of Caitlin Clark's shoe? It was a little before that. But that's along the lines of- It's that philosophy of Nike. Of what they're doing. Yeah, it sucks. I think you...

It's a good sign. I think the definite thing you do is plant your flag. Yes, like you said, we want to say that we're for the insane... Like, if you wear these, you'll be like Jordan, too. Like, we're for people like Jordan. Now, did you ever really in your life? You thought you were going to be a gunner, maybe, if everything worked right. You know, like, you never really thought you're going to be Jordan, but you would buy nothing but Nike.

I would buy nothing but Nike, but I would also go a step further, not to, like, invalidate your point, but just take a step further and say, I thought to me it was like a badass ethos. It's not necessarily how good you are. Obviously, everybody wants to be the best. You want to be Jordan. But that's the badass ethos. But it's like, yeah, just this idea of like, I'm different.

Like I will. They somehow, though, sniff out a 14-year-old Tiger Woods, give them all the money right up front because they knew he's going to be badass. Yeah. And they don't have a lot of misses. Anything Nike is badass. And you're right.

So now if they had marketed to young you or whoever, that you know what, this is, if you want to walk in the mall with these, this is the perfect shoe for that. I'm like, what are we doing? No, I want to, I want to, I would never have bought that. No. But, that's what it's built on. But a guy like me who wants to go walk in the mall, I want to do it in something Jordan's going to wear. Sure.

You know? You're killing all of your markets other than these. Yeah. Possibly. And how do you thread the needle on my representation? Because badass athlete guy is never going to buy the shoe that markets itself is good for mall walkers. Right. So you got to get what you got.

But obviously, that's like the girl can play in the men's league. You know, they're the men's league. Do your thing. Everybody else wants to be in that. Don't now become all the other leagues because, oh, you know, actually, no. Yeah, and I'm not even saying do it because it's cool and because I like it. I'm saying, and I think we all are, from a business standpoint, this is just not tenable. It's not sustainable.

So they took the ad down because people. or people who were running, like a five-time qualifier posted. That would have made me cry. Had I been there and saw that? Due to a spinal cord injury I have, I have to take walk breaks. And then they pivoted to such a lame sign. I don't even know what they did. It says Boston will always remind you movement is what matters.

As long as you're moving. Just get out and move. Yeah. Yeah, that's marketing to, uh, I don't know Buster Brown Is that a shoe What's the

Dr. Scholes It's Yeah Brooks Brothers There you go There's your Tit Oh

And that Was today in Twitter Are we ready for news Whatever you want The news could be brought to us By Lucy All right I got some Lucy

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afterward, it's not all gross. It's Lucy. You can make out during. Dumbzo. You might as well. Swap it back and forth. Give them the flavor buster. Sure. That's how I gave Blake. Transfer the flavor blast or buster, the breaker, over to your loved one. one in their mouth. I'm going to tell you another thing, too. If you're someone who likes to get a little nicotine fix, very plain friendly, the Lucy. Other things, perhaps, not as plain friendly. But the nicotine pouch is going to come through for you on the plane.

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Nicotine is an addictive chemical. What are what he's doing out there? Here's Jay. I sit in. It's outside. So fired up. It's 420. Oh.

Do you think he's flaming up? Something's going on. Yeah. Did I sound gay saying flaming up? You flaming up? Oh, you flaming up? Oh, you flaming up? Damn it up, bro.

Two men were found dead inside a minivan late last week in Fort Worth. They had crashed their minivan. Now, that's no good. The response to this crash... Why do two men are men driving in a minivan? They needed a hazmat response and a federal drug investigation unit. If you hadn't seen this story from over the weekend, this is two dudes who were carrying 10 buckets of liquid meth. Damn.

They were transporting like what Walter and the used to have before they'd cook it into glass. Oh, like the big drum? It's a fucking paint can, dude. Like a massive paint vat open, full of liquid meth. The fumes got to them and they passed out at the wheel. Both of them passed out and wrecked their vehicle. Oh, and then Diana Rusini showed up. One man was already dead in the passenger seat.

The other one was alive when they got there, then died. A couple firefighters had to go to the hospital for fume inhalation and having a good time, it says. What's the street value of that? I love saying that. Boy, is it in this story? They say it's 480 pounds, but is there a dollar amount? What if you found, you happen upon this? They kind of crashed on a back road.

You found it. And you're like, you know what, I'm just going to take one of these buckets of meth. How much money could. You get out of it. Oh, man, zero. Like how could you ever? Just because I just don't have the, I don't, there was time. Do you have someone to call that you could be like, hey man, I got like this bucket of meth?

I could 100% get rid of it. But what I'm saying is I don't think I could get rid of it in a way that I'd feel comfortable legally at all. I'd be in jail in a day. But if you're asking me, do I think three phone calls from now, I could find somebody who could take this off my hands? I think I could. it wouldn't take one phone call, but I think by three I'd get it done. But I would be in jail.

And I don't want that. I don't want the risk of it. There was a time, maybe before kids, where you're like, would I take, like, a 1% chance at five years in jail for half a million dollars? There was a time. You wouldn't do it now?

Fuck no. It's just five years. No way, dude. You'd get out of blast ball. We had the story the other day, very sad, of a guy who was a fixture in the local cycling community had crashed

with a car and died. I thought about you today because I was driving back to my house this morning. Leading statement. Me and that I was gone. You did look like you were a little pumped up. Guy driving, so guy's on a bike coming my way,

so he's on the other side of the street, I'm just regular. But then there's a guy behind him, and you know our street, very, it's 30 miles an hour, whatever. We're chilling. It's up Carroll. Guy that was following him starts to pass him, so now it's me, this big van is in the middle of us, and then bike guy.

And like, this guy is in such a hurry. Like, he almost killed that guy. Yeah. And that guy wasn't wearing the bike outfit. He was just wearing a sweatshirt and a helmet. He had like a gray goatee. You know that guy. So I don't know why he wasn't just on the sidewalk.

He didn't look like real cyclist guy. Unfortunately, that might be where we start this. Why are you on? See, the other day. Because the road is for everybody. That's what I'll tell you. I had one the other day. I feel like I must have been headed to your house.

Blake might have been the guy. You're also impatient behind a bike, right? Because they're doing that as a middle, finger to you. I can see through it. It might be out there just trying to get in shape. Then get on the sidewalk. Get on the sidewalk. Yeah, I go to a track

right around there. I almost got hit by, it looked like a teen. There was a teen who passed them and she had timed it very poorly to a point where I just had to stop, like mid-road on a 30-mile-an-hour street because she hadn't left enough room.

I'm like, what are we? What are we doing? Boy, I had a tough time coming out of the airport yesterday. The airport's all jacked up. For the World Cup? A lot of construction. A lot of expansion. So, uh...

They say for the World Cup. What does that mean? I don't know. They put it in an extra runway for the World Cup? So I am leaving the airport. But anything that's happening, just go World Cup. I feel like we're not prepared for what's coming. No, I don't think so.

No, it just, you realize at the airport and, and I used to be this way, for sure. So maybe it's... I was drunk, though. But people at the airport... The whole thing, leaving the, everyone's so mad. Everyone is, you realize when you've kind of like potentially gotten to a place where not everything pisses you off. And I'll tell you, when you're in like treatment or fucking whatever, the most common things people will say about like checking your frustration is traffic and like the airport. They'll be like, so I'm, you know, I was taking a trip the other day and this is coming up and I had to like, okay.

And it's that in traffic. And there was a lady in front of me on the plane yesterday. I had a middle seat. That was part of booking a last minute flight. I'm tall. Two people next to me are tall. My knees are going to hit your seat some. It's just going to happen.

You're on a plane. Is this a 72 point font lady? No. This was another lady who Dan would have been really into. And she turned around and was like, excuse me? And I'm like. Wait, did you have an accent? The accent sold it.

Yeah. I was like, yeah. You know. She have a Bluetooth in? I just shrug. Like, I'm not engaging with you. And then I was leaving the parking lot And there was a dude

And I can only figure that he had a baby in the back Because it was a woman in the back seat And he was in the front by himself And I guess he wanted to get in It was going down to one lane And I wasn't really paying attention I wasn't trying to be an asshole But he was trying to get in front of me

And I just kind of didn't notice And he just lays on the horn The bird outside the window And I just kind of said, go ahead When's the last finger you gave? It's been. a minute. And I tell you, it wasn't last night or yesterday afternoon because... Blake's been more recent. I then sped up. I let it another two or three cars go in front of me

because I'm like, whatever, if these people want to get in. And then I caught up to him and I gave him the thumbs up. And I said, have a good day. I'm not a finger guy. No? It just seems kind of silly. Certainly it is. You ever gotten mad at it? Like, does it do anything? I think it's kind of funny when someone gives you the finger. I like it when they do the, isn't there like a kind of hitting your, like, what's that move? Like you're punching up and kind of a boom.

Yeah, learned about that from Grand Theft Auto. Anyways, the reason we have that, go ahead. I just wanted to give you an airport pickup hack because I do a lot of picking up at the airport. Right. All right. And it's always like, it's become quite a mess up there. Roll cup. Go downstairs.

Go downstairs. Pick up downstairs. There's nobody down there. Just have them meet you. Just walk down the stairs, go down the escalator, whatever. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And we'll get right out. Get right in, right out.

Up there, you're waiting. People are upset. Can I find a place to park over here? It's going to be a cop telling you to get moving. Like, just go down below. It's air conditioned, kind of, like, because it's under the, there's no sun. You're in the down below. It's the drop off.

It says drop off, but no, no, guess what? They're not policing that. Yeah, big time. They're like, hey, you didn't drop someone. They got in the car. No, no, no, it doesn't matter. It's actually worked both ways. Little tip.

So honor the man who died bicycling by picking up your family members downstairs at the airport. That's right. And there won't be a lot of traffic and stuff. You won't run over that guy. So that guy was last week. This week we have down the woodlands. And I have a story for you about this. But a man who was participating actually looks like the family of probably Robert.

Downey Jr. is going to be pretty sad here because it said Saturday Iron Man died. It's an Iron Man race. He died in the swim part. He said, I want to swim. What's Iron Man? That happens. It's where you've got to bike, swim, and run. It's a triathlon.

Yeah, but I think it's like the... Oh, it's longer than... Sponsored, and it's like you have a certain amount of time to do it. It's the distances. My dad used to do... Oh, this is the... Okay, so it's a... marathon and a

Okay, Iron Man is the full everything. Yeah. And they have like triathons are smaller than they have mini triathlons. My dad would do the mini triathlon. And he lived in the woodlands. And he went and got his heart checked when he was 55 because this happened in this exact same lake when my dad was getting ready to run like a mini triathlon or participate in one.

Oh, yeah? Yeah. And there's a reason they make you swim first. That's the hardest? And it's the part where you can die the easiest. What did that... Didn't your dad actually find some hard problems when that happened? Major.

Like, was near death. And he was already... My dad was working like 100 hours a week, and it was killing him. He was eating clean. He was participating in triathlons. And now he's a man of leisure. Yeah. For the most part.

He does have the occasional battle. that he engages in with his HOA. We need to get him on soon, maybe. Yeah. Because I've heard... He's got a couple battles he's fighting. He moves every year. He will.

I'm quite positive at some point. He'll become tired of these people. I checked in with our man of leisure. He's doing well. Good. I want to make sure he's still alive. Okay, good. There was a press conference over the weekend in the Oval Office

featuring Donald Trump and Joe Rogan. So he got him back in line a little bit. after his criticism of the war in Iran, but this was over something else. This was over something that we got an email about in the last couple of weeks. And it is a therapeutic psychedelic drug that is illegal in the United States called Ibogaine. It's, let's say like ayahuasca adjacent, but you administer it via IV, like at a facility, and they use it for depression and anxiety and addiction and sleep problems. And we got an email from a guy, listener, who went down to Mexico and did this.

And anecdotal, but like one treatment. And he said he came out and felt like a different person and was no longer depressed after a lifelong bout with it. Wasn't all sad like Blake? So Rogan, no, there is a sad part though, because you're going. through like a five-day thing of like a, you know, find the depths of your existence. There's stuff going, but you're not in a jungle. You're in a facility with nurses and IVs and Xanax if you needed to calm down,

sleep meds. He said he was up for three days, two and a half days, but at the end of all of it, he's like, I've found something for me that I can't let go of, and it worked. And so the whole deal here. I feel like that sounds better than the thing. that Aaron Rogers did. Yeah. Well,

just like you said, if you're in a jungle and eating a bug and you're like, it just felt weird. Feels rapy to me too. Like they're scamming you. Yeah.

So, yeah, he's, you know, Trump is on board with stuff like this because he's not really any, you know, he has no ideological

commitment, you know, like typically you would think the right wing the Republicans are like, we're not studying drugs. Right. We're going to make him illegal.

I feel like he's like Jerry. If you could, just sit down with him in a room. Yeah, and in this case, Trump said, like, Rogan said he had just kind of texted him, like, hey, this helps with opioid addiction. That's the big thing. I'd love to text Trump. Apparently, it's way easier than people realize, dude. He'll just answer the phone.

Let's see here. What else did I want to do? Oh, this is a good one. We had a man in Dallas convicted, 67-year-old dude, sending threatening letters. And what ended up being fake biological weapons to a federal courthouse in Fort Worth? I'm not saying... A little white powder. If you were to just look at...

Remember those days? Oh my God, dude. Guess what? They got away with that, huh? There was nobody ever arrested for the... The actual anthrax that was mailed? Yeah. But...

So this guy's from Dallas. And I just think about if you project out your life at 67. Let's do a little pie chart. And, you know, I'd say maybe there's a... for me a 25% chance. Like, it's going pretty well, and I live in a place like where my dad lives. Everyone still likes me. But there's a sliver on that chart, be it three to five percent, where I'm absolutely

mailing letters and powders to the government. Now, in this Utopia, is there, do you have old magazines so you can cut out the letters? Yeah. That's always a good bit. He was convicted at three counts of mailing threatening communications. That's a fun one. Vague? Yeah, I know. Boy, I saw one of the most vague ones ever this weekend.

This is real mail, snail mail? Yeah. Oh, yeah. That's a real crazy person thing. Yeah, because anybody can email. Yeah, because somebody got, who was it that got arrested this weekend? Zaccari and Branch? Yeah, the Georgia wide receiver.

He was arrested. Well, I never know what to believe on these things. Okay. You're just reading the account. It seems like he was arrested for being black. No, but yes. Was he doing? Okay.

No, but it's just, this is why I tweeted out, Ben there when I saw the report. He was outside of like a bar or a restaurant or something. The cop's like, get moving. We're not having people stand here. And he was like, all right. I'm going to stand here. Yeah, kind of, and the cop wrote, he replied with a smirk.

Because that's what cops are looking for. Right. And it shouldn't be in the, A subjective... Record at all. Yeah. And so they arrested him. And you could feel about this how you want, right?

I certainly understand the idea that, like, hey, you should be living in a hermetically anchor word sealed container for the two weeks before the draft. Whatever. And you weren't. You were at a bar. But... And I actually... You probably just keep...

Start walking. I also, 20 years ago, I was arrested for something like this. And I was written a ticket by another time when I was 16. And at the time, you can be right all you want. I was still in the mode of like, if I'm right, then this will be cool. And it doesn't matter. But you'll be in jail for a night. You'll have a ticket.

Maybe you'll get it dismissed. I did. But I still had to go to court. I had to. Right. And that guy will get, right. Yeah. That cop knows he's just creating quite a hassle for you.

Yeah. And he knows this will never stick. Yeah. But at least you didn't have the NFL draft coming up the next week. I didn't have the NFL draft coming up, but it was my buddies commissioning into the Marine Corps as an officer. That was a really tough look to be the guy who gets arrested that night. You made it all about you?

It happened early enough that I'm pretty sure they moved on very quickly. Okay. I mean, it was like 10 o'clock. 9.30, which is an important part of it. It isn't like everybody went home. No, no, no, no. Oh, Jared's arrested. Well, I guess we know where he is now.

Yeah. Also, just too early to get arrested. It's just too early because you're going to have so much time in there. What time was this? Or you say yours was. Mine. Mine was too early. I wasn't drunk enough. That's the problem.

Because half the dudes that were in there with me, they would come in between midnight and four. They didn't know where they were. So your post-game analysis of it. I should have been drunker and it should have been later. There's your news. Don't do anything halfway, right? The dumb zone. News, like, and subscribe.

That was a good news. What if we do? Happy birthday. Thank you. These are brought to us by poncho. Poncho. Yeah, well, this is disguised as a traditional business meeting, but then it turned into an ambush. Oh, make you be.

Lantrell Williams, Jr., a well-known rapper by the stage name, Poo Shistee. Doesn't he wear poncho? Exclusively on Fox 4. Pancho outdoors.com slash dumbzone. get you $10 off and free shipping. You need some ponchos for the spring, for the summer. Go get you a nice little two or three of these shirts that put in a rotation. These shirts are so nice.

You could wear them on the Cowboys charter flight. You could wear them in the press box when everybody's real dressed up. You're sitting there with Steve Berline. You'll look better than Steve Berline when you're wearing your poncho. And then... Maybe go fishing. Go fishing after the game. Go hang out in the sun

Yeah No burn Poncho outdoors.com slash dumbzone It's my favorite shirts They got the SPF? They do Let's see if anything rolled in During the show

Okay Apparently it did I give you Dear Sir Daniel Not the Esquire won Yesterday was my 44th birthday I took that Fake Redhead Ladies

Advice And got shit wax in a manicure. Went to Game Day men's health. By the way, they accept the dumb zone 10% off at the Tyler location. And get all juiced up in preparation for my night of the year. Night. Nice.

And for what? Went to bed with my side with the kickstand out with anticipation. On my side with the kickstand out. Woke up the same way. Thanks, Game Day. My leaders are Sarah Hepelah's handrest. and Garland Richardson driving by the sphere from Be Well. It's a great email.

Greetings Gourmet Gash Gobbler. It is my Kevin Durant birthday today. More foodie CK content. More handoff. Less disparaging of the greatest television show of all time, Madman. I thought he's about to come for Frazier. That's from Kyle in Houston. No, I love the part where it was like it was from a time before.

And that's what really made me into it. Because my grandparents would talk about it. So for real, I asked my mom this weekend if she's watched Mad Men. And she's like, I watched like half of the, because I sent her season one apparently on DVD years ago. Nice. And she goes, I watched like half of it, but I had to stop. And I go, why? she said, because it made me want to smoke too much.

Yeah. Wow. Because she's had like a heart attack and she's had bad times. So she had to quit smoking, but she wants to smoke. Subconsciously, I think that that was a part of the reason why that show was a problem for me. Smoking and always drinking? It's always drinking. There's never a scene.

You're like, ah, you probably have a little. It's fine. Dear Uncle Hotmail, Slitslayer, and Fupa Filayer. It's a birthday of my wife, Diana. She turns 47 today. She was not woken up in that special way. Her leader is Dan, half-eaten napkins, and all of my imaginary fellowship of dumb friends in the YouTube chat.

She moved here from Valparaiso, Indiana, home of Orville Redenbacher, where they honor him with a Labor Day popcorn festival and parade every year. Okay. Attached, you will find a picture of the popcorn festival's 9-11 Memorial Float. Excellent. Complete with both work. Trade Center towers represented. Notice the attention to detail, which includes explosions and debris coming out of the giant

holes created by the airplanes that crashed into them. Personally, I can't have popcorn without thinking of this incredibly tasteful tribute to the victims of 9-11. Never forget. This is from Todd Poston. Nice. That's very funny. For real.

I like working that in. They have a 9-11 thing. I like working the tastiness of the... It's like the hooters. With holes in it for popcorn. It's like the Hooters shirt that I have, the Let Freedom Wing. That's great. And Dear Brackett, Dan, it is my former P1 current D1 friend Jacob's birthday.

He's a member of the Beehive. Excellent. But his leader is Jake trying to rewrite a question when he knows he was wrong. And then attacking someone else to try and move the spotlight away from him when it invariably doesn't work. Go 420. from strobe man you can take that from him jake i feel like that is probably the right thing to do

it's an eight errors reference probably yeah i mean we i don't know if you want to it's frustrating i feel like there were some uh dishonest rhetorical exercises taking place i'm like i'm like you're right you get what i'm saying is i didn't know this you guys are like no it's somehow

dougn't org presents i thought about it on this day non-stop History. Doing it again. Non-stop. Eight years by a team could happen. Just one guy would be very difficult. I know you and I are both having trouble with remembering copy for Fairleys,

so let's call Fairleys and we'll make them do a 60-second spot for us. That's a good idea. We're going to call our friend Nick, who is... Welcome to the voice mailbox of Nicholas Cunningham. Oops. Well, Nick, pick up. We just got the voicemail? That feels like...

Now, to be clear, this is not the number you would call to call Fairle. This is his personal number. Call the number then. We thought would be... Oh, wait. Do you not have the number? No, it's on the copy. It's on screen.

972-705. Call that number, because I told Nick we'd be calling like at 2. Welcome. Oh, that's the one you called? Yeah. Well, then go into the run sheet and call that one I put on there. I did. Oh, they're both the same?

That's not good. You want to hear from clavicular? Are you vamp? Absolutely. Here's my clav of the day. He was asked if he wants kids. Yeah, I might have put the wrong one on there. I saw a clav on the weekend talking to a group at a nursing home.

So funny. Do you want kids? Yes, I want to have kids. Dude, I need to have kids. I need to have kids yesterday. I've been wanting to figure that out. I need to get some HCG. So I'm actually going to do a competition where, like Zerka,

said, we have 500 girls who come up into a competition, like a beauty pageant or something. Then I come in the winner and circle. Oh, my gosh. Okay, then. A lot of setup on the front end of that and then kind of pretty abrupt ending, as it were. Did I get you Nick's number? Just the correct one, maybe? I hope.

Hey, Nick. Hey, Nick. This is Nick. How can I help? This is Dan Hey, Jake And Blake We're with the dumb zone

Well, it's great to hear from you guys How are you doing today? Here's our premise here Our very loose premise is We can't remember the copy points we need for our live spot For fairly So we were going to call Nick to You're the guy directly

We direct people to call you at 972 705 4815. And what would you, like if somebody's like, hey man, I got 60 seconds. Why should I hook up with Fairlease? We got the best rates in the business. In addition to that, we save companies money end over end, whenever you use our program. And in addition to that, we're a concierge service.

We take care of everything for it. You don't have to worry about anything. we make sure that the only thing that you've got to worry about is making that money. That's the only thing you should be worried about. Would you bring the car to us? Absolutely. We would like to scoreboard. Yeah, what if I'm at my enemy's home?

Will you bring it there? Blake wants to do it at a softball game. With verbal confirmation, I'll bring it there. I've got to get it on a recorded line, but we'll figure it out. Okay. Why does it matter that you guys are owned by the, what is it, the Credit Union of Texas? Sorry. Well, I mean, most people, when they give you a deal on a car, they're going to sell that paper to a bank, right?

And every person involved has got to make money to stay alive, right? With us, we're to the bank. We minimize that, and we're in your backyard, you know? We'll take care of you just to make sure that you stay with us. fan of middlemen, are you, Nick? No, I'm not. I'm a huge middleman. Nick's her. Take them out. I hate them. Are you talking about

the full eradication of middlemen? Some sort of a final... I'd like to eradicate them. Wow. All right, well, make sure we can answer the phone. What's your full name? So, Nicholas? Nicholas, that's it. Nicholas

Cunningham, that's my full name. But it's NIC, right? Yes, it is. You don't go NIC? Well, I mean, I didn't make the decision when I was born, but if I had any type of, you know, play in it, I would say that I like the way that it's unique. I get it a lot, though. I'll say that. I have this conversation a lot. Okay.

Well, call Nick. Have the conversation with him at 972-705-4815 Fairlease.org. Thanks, dude. Happy 420. Hey, happy 420. Yeah, bro. See you. Oh, yeah.

There you go. Everyone loves it. Oh, we're doing today in history. Monday, April 20th, on this day in 1972, Apollo 16. Lands on the Moon. John Young and Charles Duke. God. Think of the next person that walks on the moon is going to be named like...

Zander? Braden. Yeah. Zander. Yeah, Charles Duke. That's a kick-ass name. That's a man's man right there. Yeah, he should own the moon.

On this day in 1979, Jimmy Carter, the U.S. president, was attacked by a swamp rabbit. I've seen this video. That swims up to his fishing boat in plains, Georgia. Yeah, not exactly emanating strength as a political candidate in that moment. Yeah, I think that was what ended up coming out of that. Yeah. I got one for, maybe you had this on the list, and I'm cucking your bit. Go ahead.

Because it's from over the weekend, actually. But 1934, the first Washtieria opened in Fort Worth, Texas. Very nice. That's well-known, right? I think it is. That's why I wanted to mention it. It's only well-known because we mentioned it. I only knew it because I live here, and I remember hearing as a kid.

Be like, wow, man. Poor Worth? We invented doing your laundry all at one place. Dude, just like, Jesus Christ, when will our innovation in? So that was the bid. It was just one place that everybody could do their laundry. It's just a sell, yeah, it's just laundry for poor people.

You know, in that time, I would imagine. Maybe a lot of, not everybody had a laundry machine. When's the last time you went to the laundromat? Man, I feel like I had, like hotel doesn't count, right? Right. I mean, you live at home, you go to the laundromat, though. It's been a long time. You remember mine.

Yeah, I do. You were going to a place in grapevine, aren't you? Trey broke my washing machine. I got back from vacation. Yeah, I remember that, because it felt like every time you went there, it felt like you were falling in love. Yeah, for sure. And, of course, on this day in 1999, Jake, the Columbine High School Massacre

took place in Colorado as two students shot and killed 12 classmates and one teacher, then they took their own lives. And I was thinking, now does a 12 student gunman rate for front page news? 12 student alone? No. So if you got a buddy? But if you have a buddy and you have the, I would say, okay, let's just all, be cool here, right?

There has to be a coolest school shooter. There's going to be a bunch of school shooters. One of them has to right? In what way, yeah? Well, I mean, if you were to look at all, of every group of people, you'd be like one of the coolest. So in this one, I'm simply saying that

the level of like theatrics and narrative and backstory and like the thing that Blake referenced of like, this about your God before me. Like, that is a lot, you know? You're saying they set the bar high and it still has not been... I don't think it has. I mean, I know there are kids with manifestos and I know there are...

Do you wonder why there's not more live streaming of it? I mean, I imagine it's, you know, pretty hard to get it out there. I mean, it happens actually quite a bit. No, like while you're doing the school shooting. It's happened. It has. It has. They take it down immediately.

I mean, within it going up, it's something's getting reported. But, oh, yeah, dude. And do you remember like that race grocery store murder in Buffalo? Yeah. That dude streamed the entire thing. And you can find that. Do you're after? No, I'm not really after.

Hey, why can't I see any of this murder? You know, I always like lighthearted fare for the, uh, to help get to sleep. Maybe something running breaks. But I was just thinking, so in the future is, and there's never really been a real dress-up thing, like I'm going to dress as Rambo. Or I'm going to dress as Iron Man or just whatever. Just saying maybe a costume into the school shooting space would be... I'm just saying if you want to set yourself apart now. I agree.

And I'm also saying... It's like Nike, you know. Be something. April 20th, this day in Dumb Zone history. In 2020, we were doing a little draft prep for the Dallas Cowboys. And we were coming off a historically bad... defensive season. Justin Fields. And no.

We were saying, grab a few average defenders rather than just maybe one above average. That draft lane in Micah Parsons. So maybe we just drafted another Micah. Now, that is a very interesting point, and I remember that year,

I was not happy when they drafted Micah. I was super pissed because he had a total of about two. I did care about that, to be honest with you. based on the stuff you knew at the time and all the stuff the Cowboys were selling you and it was also 2019, maybe we were overreacting to a little guy

sexual hazing. I don't know. It didn't seem good. Now since then, a bunch of people from up there have told me it really wasn't anything worse than what you'd expect. You know, it's the leaders in a locker room

being gay aggressive. But my main beef was that he was an off-the-ball linebacker. and I really cared about that a lot more back then. And he had rushed the pass for like 200 times. Yeah, he wasn't known as an edge. And they just started running him inside, outside. But you know what they didn't do? They didn't trade up to get him.

They traded down. They didn't have to go package picks. They didn't have to go, you know. They came out with a guy that you would have moved up for by moving back. Also, this was 2020. Rare miss by GM Jerry this year, you know? That's the guy who drafted Micah by. moving back. I want to get Dan's take on this. So lockdown was in March, so we're like a month

into lockdown. And we did the story about this cruise ship that had not come back yet because it knew COVID had taken over. Wow. I forgot that. It had been out for seven weeks. And so, Dan, if you were on this cruise ship, would you just want to stay out as long as you could? Boy, that's a Whatever the Sophie's choice Yeah, like we're all None of us are sick, right?

No, you're all healthy So we're not going to get sick If we don't go back to the mainland But you're with all cruise people Yeah, so imagine it was like a One of those movies, pandemic movies, though There are actual bodies in the street

You'd have to step over on your way back home I think you'd want you'd stay out there right Yeah? Yeah, I would stay out there but I would move quickly. I would try to consolidate power and see if I could make a play. Because I tell you what's going to happen. I had this moment yesterday, and this is like what it's like to be a dude, I think.

I told you guys, Drew McGarry used to write about this all the time. But I was, uh, my plane came into Terminal C and I needed to get to Terminal D. So I'd take the Skylink, right? It's about the size of a subway car. It's in the sky. It's fucking way up there, dude. and when you have to go from C to D, you have to do the curve.

Now, when you have to do the curve, it's a loop. Oh, yeah. No, I've been on it many times. I have it. I've gone from like B to C or C to B. Did it throw you over? It didn't throw me over,

but to take the curve, you got to hold on. It has to slow all the way down. Oh. To a snail's pace to get that curve, and then they put it back and drive, and it starts going. Well, when you're on that curve,

you're in there with like 20 people, And I don't know that all of them were ready for it either because it kind of stops and then it starts puttering along and you're like What would I do if this thing stopped up here? There's out in midair and we're far enough from D and C. We're in the middle. Yeah, we're out we're whatever 20 stories up Do you just start having sex with everyone? Well, you know what I did think is I did think somebody in here would need There'd be a couple people who need to take control and you're like I'm probably one of that's I'm the guy I don't know, but you will see in times like that like uh i don't know there's like improv games like that where you like you have to do like people have to get on the same page whoever just says i'm in charge people will

listen for a little bit so i feel like somebody in there and i don't know that would be me i'd want someone else to do that and then i'd just bitch about them i would support them i wouldn't want to be the guy but i like being a second in command like yeah i hope you run do you guys run through those scenarios like immediately in your head you're just like god What if? What if? Yeah. No.

I try to not work myself up like that. You just chill. In 2023, Jake says it's been a big decade for cups, and I feel like you were a little bit ahead of your time. Now it's the Stanley. Can I tell you guys the most shameful thing in my life in the past 48 hours? My wife has a cup made by a company. I don't know how to say it, but it's BRU mate, brewmate.

Brewmate. My kid, my son, is obsessed. with my wife's cup. Now I, a smart man, understand that that's because psychologically, deeply implanted in him, Freud or not, he's competing for her time and resources. He wants the cup because it's her cup. She turned around and bought him like a kid's brumate cup that's nicer than any cup that ever existed the entire time I was alive until five years ago. Now my three-year-old has like a $30 cup, which will be gone, wasted, And also, I'm going to film it when he gets it so I can show you guys.

Because he doesn't like the cup. It's not the cup. He wants to take something from you. Yeah. Yeah. That's it. That's what it is. Why he's hitting me so much because he wants to have sex with her.

Makes sense. It's true. On this day in 2023, LeBron said he knew Austin Reeves was going to be good, which we just added to the list of. Hey, bro. He goes the deluxe album. Today's not the day I'm going to tolerate any king slander. No, my apologies.

You want a playoff game without both of them? With a son. Yeah. Dude, please tell me y'all saw Skip. Skip. No. I don't know where he puts this stuff out, but he's got his own little outlet. And his rant last night or over the weekend was that he has always known that Brony

had a little more clutch in him than LeBron did. More. Okay. Because Skip has always said that Braun is a little afraid of the moment. You know, he doesn't show up like Jordan and Kobe did and these other greats. But when he sees Brony, he sees Kobe. He sees the instincts. And final thing, 2022, we had Chain and Glue Girl on.

Do you remember these little gals? Yeah, they were mad because the owner of the Timberwolves. Timber wolves gasped like a million chickens because they got a disease. Protesting Glenn Taylor, yeah, for how he killed five million chickens. And then they told us how they got the stuff in,

how they got to the court, she glued herself, a chain girl went to jail. It's great. I appreciate that more than just being like bitching online, you know? Yeah, do something. Speaking of booking viral people,

do you want to promote anything? thing? I do. We played a video last Thursday of who we're calling the zesty volleyball player. And I have to address this because I guess people online are just this dumb. I said a volleyball broadcast, a color commentator. Somebody thought I said colored commentator, like people still say that. And let me rephrase it. One of the volleyball. volleyball broadcast analysts said he should be... You can't do this now. You've been calling him that for years.

Yeah. And it's kind of your... That's what you always do to us. Isn't that why you have a subset called the colored hive? I was shocked when you said it, so I'm glad somebody's picking up on it. Anyway, guys... I just thought it was back. I thought we're allowed to say it again.

The Zesty volleyball player will do a finger wag. He'll just do his little spin. Stick his butt out a little. He's very, like, flamboyantly. gay to upset the other team. And he's apparently awesome. Anyway, that spread. We played his video.

We love him. He'll be on the show on Friday. Jordan Lucas. Now, don't use your language in front of him. Do you think he's woke? Nah, whatever. I bet he's awesome. Oh, yeah.

Yeah, I can't wait. Is that mutually exclusive? You can't be both? It's tough. Yeah. It's tough. You're right. Jonathan Mingo is 25.

Any day now. Oh, yeah. Any day now. He's still a cowboy, right? I think they brought him back. Yeah. Anthony Fasano is 42. Second round pick, Cowboys.

No. Was he a second round? Yeah, but I believe Anthony Fisano was too. Gavin Escobar was not the first of his name. A cowboy's second round tied in. 53rd overall. No way. Yep.

And then he went to the Dolphins and had a pretty nice little run there. Todd Hollinsworth is 53. Rocky? He was a ranger. Yeah, then a ranger. I think he had the longest last name in rangers history. Maybe all of baseball history. I don't know if they're the same amount.

S-A-L-T-N-A-L-T-N-A-L-O. No one knows. And I talked all over that beautiful Catalanato drop. Pity. Brandon Beltz is 38. Longhorn? Was he? Giant.

Yeah, the Fassano thing, this is where I was getting confused, because I was like, am I thinking of Tony Spirano? Like, how does this figure? They both went to the Dolphins. Yeah, and that's why they got it. The Dolphins hired Jeff Ireland, Bill Parcells, and Tony Sparano. And they were like, we got to get Anthony Fassano in here. How much money did mediocre tight-ins make

because the Patriots had a two-tied-in system? Dude. A bunch of cowboy money. A bunch of draft picks. Luke Kinkley is 35. Should not be playing flag football. Speaking of what we were just talking about there, there's a very funny Marty B.

Luke, I'll see if I can find that. Martellus Bennett talking about Luke Keekely is one of my favorite football quotes ever. Wow. Yeah. Don Mattingly is 65 with a war of 42.4. Steve Spurrier, 81. George Takai, 89, from Star Trek.

Crispin Glover. Do you get all political or no? George DeKai, yeah, I think so. I think he might have been, like, as a little kid, in a Japanese internment camp. Oh, okay, yeah. Oh, you want to make a political decai? Actually, I was...

Okay. Why don't you go back to where you came? I was born in San Francisco. Chrisman Glover, back to the future, 62. Oh, and Hot Tub Time Machine. Carmen Electra is 54. Bad Beat era. Oh, my gosh.

How about Good Beat era? What's wrong with Carmen Electra? I think more that there was a time where you were having to really kind of hide it. You were probably never seen her naked. No. You're just, maybe you see her in a movie trailer. Like, all right, that'll work. The hottest name?

First last combo? For sure. What happens if you search Luke Keeckley? Nothing? Give it a go. Just try it. Overrated flag. Ooh, overrated.

Peter Seagall is 64. It's a director, a movie director. I don't know what else he directed, but he directed the movie Tommy Boy. Oh, wow. Where we learned the word dingy. Killer Mike is 51. Yeah. I don't know.

What was it? If hip hop was just rapping, the killer Mike would be platinum. That's pretty good. And Dum's on birthday today was easy one to pick today. Oh, Martellus on Keeckley? Yes. Any chance? Keep going.

First I'll do Dumb's own birthday of the day. Easy pick, 67 years old, Wimhoff. Oh. A part of my life almost. every day. He's been on the show. You cold bath or shower or whatever? No. Plunge? No, I do try to mix in a cold shower, but I do his breathing,

10-minute breathing. You hold your breath for two and a half minutes. Fully in. Now hold for 15 seconds. You're doing fantastic. It's in April. I can't play audio. Fully in. Do you think the accent helps? Oh my gosh. There's no way I'd buy that from some guy named Cameron. I did go to Max, my trainer this morning.

And I was thinking, when he's telling me I'm doing great, I don't know that I am. Everyone's great is different. Okay. He didn't say for you, you're doing great. It's implied. Is it? Yeah. I'll try this.

Hey, Lou Kikli. You know, it's like, hey, where you come from? You know, it's just like that fly when you're in the restaurant. There's one fly in the restaurant, but it's only flying on your food. Nobody else has a fly around their food except for it. fly decides to come to your plate. And some people in a restaurant has ordered the same stuff that you have, but the fly comes around and bother you. Luke Kinkley's everywhere on the field. Damn, where he come from? That's great.

I can listen to Marty Talk Football forever. Born on the Stay Now Dead, we of course have Adolf Hitler. And of course, as we mentioned at the beginning of the show, it's Clayton's birthday today. Clayton, Foodie, C.K. Hey. And Josh. I feel like we delivered. Josh's birthday?

Oh. Has the chat been happy about your birthday? Are they? Very indifferent. Right now they're talking about sleeping temperature. Okay. They don't care about Clayton anymore. No.

Dead on this day is still dead. Boy, this must have been tough for Clayton. Rick Rude. ravishing Rick Road. Like not on my birthday, man. And also dead on this day, still dead in 2024. Howie Schwab. He was finally stumped.

Stumped the Schwab. And that's what happened. I can't believe he did a little long, healthy life. Well, he was like, yeah, it was probably like 60. I was going to say he was kind of old. No, he actually wasn't. That's terrible shape.

Let's bring Josh Ewan over here for closing remarks. This segment of the dumb zone brought to you by Frankl and Frankel. Even if you die in a car accident, we could help your living family get the bag. Frankl and Frankel. Yes, Frankl and Frankel, personal injury attorneys at 214 or 817, then dial all threes. When you call the Frankles, you will get on the phone with a partner. they're going to deal with your stuff right away. They used to work for the insurance companies,

so they know the dirty tricks that they try to use to keep you from getting. You know, that's one of the things like Matt Brunich will tell you that. Who do you think is hiring like these top, top attorneys out of college, the companies? And a lot of times, like that's, they'll hire the top minds out of college. And then those top minds sometimes will be like, you know what? it's probably better to work. I don't love this. For the little guy.

And that's what Frankl and Frankel does. They will work for you. It's 214, 817, all threes. And while you have one collapsed lung, you can barely talk, and you're on the phone with them, make sure that you mention that you heard about them on the dumb zone.

And then you can flatline. And they'll get the money for your family, right? Absolutely. Isn't that what's important? Your loved ones. Yeah. Justice for them. they bring you closing remarks

yes joining us now is not josh lewin we this guy third time third time's a charm one of the most interesting listeners we have from a life setup standpoint he's a stay-at-home husband is the money right right

and your job is to what basically that's the homemaker I guess is what you would call it do you keep things clean and everything yeah absolutely yeah all the house is very clean all the cleaning all everything everything she doesn't have to worry about anything too i'm like i've definitely tried to take care of her she's working at home i'm like coming in and i'm like bringing her coffee i'm taking her dishes it's like

i want to keep you happy you are like why would i not you know yeah right right i'm cargie she needs to think i'm like on it and taking care of everything and so you make sure there's dinner yeah i mean you're making sure like we don't even cook that much but yeah like i definitely you'll go pick up though if she needs someone to go pick up the food and So it's like, hey, focus. It's like a pro athlete life. Like, hey, focus on your job. You bring the money in, and I'm going to make stuff easy for you.

And that's what you do for her. Yeah. I don't let her sleep around. But yeah, pro athletes are probably a little more forgiving of that. We are in a committed relationship. Yeah. Right. There's a level.

Yeah. Yeah. That's right. And this is also, I think, the place that I turned around the toilet paper years ago. I don't know if you all heard a second ago, the cat, there was a little thing when all were doing the, what it was you all were doing, but they made a little cat noise over there. It freaked out a little bit. It's been cowering over there. You know my crazy ass cat. You had an incident with the cat too. The first year we were here, that cat would actually physically assault

you. Yes. Yes. And you even swarmed me. You said, don't walk near the cat. It will scratch your legs. It will, yeah. But it doesn't, it's not crazy. It's not that crazy anymore, but it's still a little crazy. Okay. But it got scared last year because it was raining and it was hiding the whole time. And it had to listen to Chris Farley's brother. Yeah. Yeah. It's always hated. So, yeah, always a memorable show here. And then today, the day that Brandon Aubrey gets signed.

Yeah, that's awesome. That's this great news. I'm glad he's going to continue on. Keep the mic close. Sorry, yeah. It'll cut out. Eat it. Okay.

I will eat the mic. Are we good? Yeah. Cool. All right. Do you want me to start? Yeah. All right.

So the, I do want to say, like, just coincidentally, I didn't think it all through. I do not, I'm not down with Nazi stuff. I denounce Nazis. I didn't think about it when I said a birthday on today. I'm not trying to do a bit. I hate Nazis. Flat out, let me just say it. Yeah.

Okay. Just so people don't think. Established. That's it. And so the funniest line, I have, the funniest line since y'all were here last, the bit that I wanted to do, I want to give y'all the line and see if you can tell me the context or who said it. Okay.

Is this from our show? Yes. Yes, absolutely. From the show, not just from the random media. The funniest line that you heard in the last year, and we have to remember who it's from. We'll see if you can tell me. Okay, so the line is, I want to do it without,

I want to do it clean, so it's not giving anything away. Where would everybody park? The line is, where would everybody park? It feels like Dan. Why does it feel like Dan? Because it's not that funny? No, I feel like when we learn it, it's going to crush. Damn, I got nothing.

Obviously, lots of people are going... What's that? He says Jake, but I have no... The context is what we need. I got nothing. Okay, well, it was Dan. Yeah. Spoil it.

And the context was the disability pride night that the guy was talking about and somehow I got onto a disability pride parade and it was like, of course, you wouldn't have a disability pride parade. Where would everybody park? And I thought that was so funny because it's like,

your first instinct is, Jesus, what an asshole to make fun of freaking people with disabilities. But then you look it out and it's like, it's actually just a logical question. Right. It's going to be a problem. You're caring for all the viewers or the parade. Yeah. And like, just you're having to sell the only handicapped spots. It goes $10,000 each.

That's great. See? I knew you were funny. Hey, thanks, guys. That works. Y'all were talking about the Pink Panther theme song the other day. Yeah. Which I distinctly remember as a kid figuring out that it came on twice in a box. For some reason, the theme would repeat. Yeah, like a 15-year-old episode.

Yeah, the second time and just like rocking out to the freaking Pink Panther theme. But there's another one, a theme song that y'all need to check out. It's called the Delta Force theme song. I don't know if you'd be able to play it because of rights or whatever. And you kind of got to get past the first 15 seconds, but it's... Is this the movie Delta Force? Yeah, that's the one. Yeah.

This is the movie... The Chuck Norris. The one he made. The one that was big, right? Not Farras. This isn't the one that we did. Not Fars. That's the other bit is the Delta Fores. Oh, yeah.

Okay. This is very 80s. Can we work out to this? Oh, without a doubt. Montages are, yeah. Oh, that's a montage song. That's very good. He basically went to the best part right away, so yeah, it's a lot.

It's awesome. I wish that's kind of my, if we had a talk show that we needed, I mean, I guess we could do this, but, like, if we had what McAfee has, that's to me how the whole show would sound. That song behind, or that type. Just like that sort of, like, style of like this, all of the, all right, we're going to head over to the. I bet Jorts can help us. I love that sound. Back to me?

We're back to Josh Ewan here. We're in the Josh Ewan. Okay. Den. Now, you have a kitchen such downstairs, I would imagine? There's a media room slash kitchen. It's for my mom, so she wouldn't have to come up here because she has a... Okay, so this is the main kitchen for the main house.

This is, yeah. Because it feels Denish. It's up above, it's high, but it's great, yeah. It's an interesting setup because mom lives here and I assume you have separate bedrooms. Yeah, so he's got to... everything you... Wait, separate from your wife? Yeah.

Oh, yeah, from... And my mom. Yeah. I just meant that there's like... You don't share bedroom with your wife. No, I snore. Excellent. Yeah.

Quote on class. Snore. Yeah, excellent hack. Pretty good bit. I like it. I like a lot. Back to you. Way to go.

Oh, yeah, there was a pink panther thing. So there's like a very specific reference. I'm going to try and explain. There's a podcast that I've referenced twice before. I might as well do a third. time called How Did This Get Made? And there's an episode of that about the show Cobra, which did y'all do hi-T COBRA one time? Yeah.

Yeah. Okay, so they did it. That's the arm wrestling? No, it's the Marriotti police officer one. Yeah, that. And so they did that episode as well. And for some reason, Brett Miller, is that the guy? He was the guest.

It was very random when the two things cross over like that. That's the guy that's on the, yeah. Yeah. So, yeah, he was the guest, and I just thought that was random. But so there's a guy on the team named Jason who, randomly starts talking about growing up there was when he was young he would always hear about the clowns and being looking out for the clowns that were going to try and kidnap kids with candy or whatever and he kind of gets like upset because no one knows what he's talking about and he assumed that

that was like a universal thing but i think it was just like a regional thing and so the reason i bring this up is because for me in west fort worth growing up the thing that they warned me about was pink panther vans and to look out for the vans with pink panthers paint on the side. I guess that was a thing for some reason? I vaguely remember that. Okay, I'm glad that I'm glad that I'm lying. I swear to God, now, because we were trying to think of something the other day that

I was creeped up when the pink panther thing came up. And I was like, was he like rapy? And I remember having some memory of like, that's like an odd thing. I don't know. That was a thing growing up. They would say, like, look out for the pink panther vans. They're out. You know, they're trying to get kids.

And I was just wondered if there was something like that for Dan in Ohio that was different. Is it regional or like, what's the deal with that? Do you remember anything like that? I do not recall anything like that, no, but I'm searching Pink Panther van. I don't know what it ordered. Like, there were a lot of random fans. It seems to be late 80s vans. Yeah.

With Pink Panther. And it on the side, yeah. It was a... And that was something you were told as kids to... I remember there being some sort of weird Pink Panther van thing. Yes. When he, when that just set something off for me. By the way, Red did this episode of this, uh, uh, review of Cobra with

Brian Possein. A comedian. Oh, wow. Really random. Okay, that's a good one. That's it for me, actually. That was the one I wanted to get out there most with the Pink Panther one, because, like I said, it's random. Well, thanks for having us again.

Yeah, thanks for coming again. Thanks for providing a model for life. Yeah, I don't know. You've got to find a lady that has, yeah, he has ascended. And you didn't have to break your jaw or anything. Good times, man. Okay. All right.

All right. Adios, mofo. We gotta go before this becomes a zoo. Thank you for watching my video. Subscribe and type for my name if you want to watch more of my video. ... ... not so on... ...his leg is not the same.

His kicks are like a sonic boom. I have to try and he can kick the...