The Dumb Zone FREE - DZ 4-30-26 | JP Morgan's cannons and a big DZ GSE announcement

Episode Date: April 30, 2026

Get every episode of The Dumb Zone by subscribing to the show at DumbZone.com or Patreon.com/TheDumbZoneThe Rangers lost the series, but won the war in the stands. This just in: Mike Vrabel announces retirement from the NFL to go work at JP Morgan. And a major show announcement about the DZ GSE (00:00) - Open: DZ GSE announcement (28:41) - Sports: Rangers take one against the Yankees (52:34) - Brendan Sorsby heads to rehab (01:03:41) - Big Thursday Viewer Mail Bag (01:30:28) - News: Mike Vrabel's application to JP Morgan (02:01:51) - VM birthdays/Today in History ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Hello, I'm professional broadcaster Dan McDowell, letting you know that you were about to hear one of our free podcast. But if you'd like to subscribe at dumbzone.com, you'll get four shows per week plus the weekend wrap-up and any bonus sods like our business Wednesday interviews. So if you forgot how to use the 15-second rewind, that's dumbzone.com to subscribe. Now, on to today's program. Hey, Jake, let's talk about flooring direct DFW. Flooring direct, dfdfdom.com slash dumbzone or slash DZ. Save time. That's what they're about.

And save time by having them come out to you. You don't have to go to a showroom, showroom after showroom to look for flooring. They will bring the showroom to you. Now, they do not bring an actual size showroom. They bring a teeny tiny. They'll have little tiny samples of floors. Could you imagine if they brought, you know, a 3,000 square foot floors to each house?

That would be ridiculous. It would be inefficient. As would going from, boy, I had just like tremors just now when you said going from showroom to show room. Yeah. The thought of just, it's not just that you've got to go look at 10 floors at one place, but you've got to go to multiple places. This is like going to multiple places because they will meet or beat any prices out there.

No need. So why would you need to go and shop for price? And they've got all the best. Those prices are the best. Those pros, they're the nicest. It all begins at FlooringDirect, d.com slash dZ. Oh.

I know. You ended it so well. But I wanted to hear the song. This is one of the best jingles I've ever heard. Our pros are the nicest. We've got the best prices at Floring Direct. Jake complains about the way I play the sound, But then he doesn't want to step in and execute himself, right?

Stay tuned. If I complain about Shottie coaching the Cowboys, do I want to do it myself? I do. Bring it on. Could you imagine me coaching the Cowboys? I can't imagine it. CEO head coach, that's what I'd be. Kind of Ted Lasso, a different take.

Oh, it's five. I got to go home. Yeah, but you get your extra condo. Oh, could you imagine that? Shottie has a condo and a house. I think there's a chance Dan might actually become accidentally like the most beloved coach in the league because he would do things like band families.

Right. He would have like no family day. And the players, of course, would have to act as if their coach was making him do it. But they would appreciate it. Right. No one wants to bring their whole family. of the game. You would mandate that they stay two nights at the hotel beforehand.

That's right. Comority. Anyway, we are broadcasting live to tape on this Thursday. And an uptick in female Indian reporters. Ah, yeah, we're going to... No, no, Clarence, why don't you fall back? I'm going to let Dalia from the

Hindu Times get the first question in here. And how would that sound? I don't do female accents. Anyway, we are broadcasting live to tape from downtown Dallas, the

Game Day men's health studio. Game Day.com. We love you, game day. How you doing, buddy? Haven't seen you in a while. I thought he was talking to his junk for a minute. Oh, look at that. He was kind of looking down. Yeah.

You were kind of looking down as if you were addressing your junk. Like, hey, how you doing, buddy? They could help with the people. shot the weiner. No doubt. Don't be embarrassed when you walk in there. They've heard it all before. They've seen it all before. You can't imagine how mangled the penises they've seen. Well, I bet your wife has said that. The wife who's a nurse is like, I've seen it all before.

Yeah, they like to rub it in your face a little bit. Go ahead. As it were. Turn over. I wish. We have a sit-in, sit-eye. We have two people in here right now. and they are here to help us promote something. How do you want to announce it? Do you want to do the announcement? Yes, so June 6th, at 6th, we will be at four corners brewery to have the Dumb Zone generic summer event, our annual event.

Will your mustache be there? It will. You're going to bring the mustache? Okay, awesome. It's got to be. Blake has a May stash. Yeah, so it's sponsored by Community Mechanical. It'll be inside.

There'll be some activities outside, but the main draw will be inside in the AC. Air conditioned by community mechanical, yeah. Air conditioned by community mechanical. Kanye Rosso will be out there serving pizzas, wood-fired pizzas. Or the burgers. The PILF group is bringing both. Unbelievable. They're bringing the burger grill, sliders, and they're bringing the pizza oven.

Can't be it. How water will be out there serving water. We got a lot of other commercial interest in this one that will be. telling you all about. We'll have profits and outlaws, our buddies who played last year. And then also playing this year, it will be our friends from the Quaker City Nighthawks. Wow. Yeah. Friend of the show, Sam Anderson.

Man, I've been known for 30 years. And our good friend, George, Jordan Richardson. Sam, who has never been on this show proper, but he was on a game stream. Oh, okay. Isn't that correct? Been to a live for me, been to the den. That's crazy. I didn't know that.

Many, many shake joints. Where I was like, I'll have my friend come up and play music. And then he would just sort of co-host the show with me for three hours because we needed help. Okay. We did that a lot. After like a three-day lake trip. Yeah. We've had our times together for sure.

So yeah, I'm very excited about this. I don't know. They haven't played a lot lately, and it feels like it'll be a cool, not homecoming. Now, Jake, initially when Jake was trying to land you guys, he was very skeptical on your ability to actually, apparently you have like a guy in. Return the text. Well, number one. He wasn't bad about that this time. I got to give him his credit. I'm not against that. But he said you got a guy like in San Diego and a guy over here.

We used to be a lot more spread out. We were a little more essentially. David was living in Durango and then Fort Collins for a while. But he is back in Austin, back in Texas proper. So it makes it a little bit easier to get stuff done. And of course, Jordan, George Richardson. I'm the one in San Diego. I'm actually going to Top Gun.

We love Jordan. We love Jordan, folks. We do. Speaking of Shake Joint, it wasn't Shake Joint, but it was the NFL draft. the only time I was really late for work, because I heard one of them use a word off the air that reminded me of something. It was the year the Cowboys drafted late in Vanderec,

I missed the first probably 45 minutes of the Saturday broadcast because we were at Stormy Daniels Make America Horny again the night before at Bucks. And this is an important part, Dan, Buck's Wild Cabaret, which is a B-Y-O-B establishment. because there are no bottoms on the ladies, most of them. So you bring your own booze. Okay, so how does that, if you can only see tops.

They sell beer. And they close earlier, I think. I should let these guys talk. They're the road dogs. You got to, like, pay for a setup. Yeah, you have to pay for ice and, like, a bucket and cups and stuff, but you bring your own stuff. It's an incredible delineation that if you're totally naked.

that's what I'm saying. Bring anything you want. Yeah, it's kind of like... Seems a little bit riskier. It's kind of like that you can go get hammered at a bar on Sunday before you can buy alcohol thing at the store. Yeah, are they worried that, like, wayward hairs would be in their beer if they were selling beer?

They just don't want to pay for a liquor license. With ladies without pants, there would be little... I mean, that's... I think there's something to what you're saying. It is a sanitary thing. Well, it is floss. Yeah, that... We were there.

It's too short to be flawed. When you bring your own liquor. I don't know. I mean, especially in that era, that was a no good. We were all just out of control. I don't think we originally knew that it was a B-Y-O-B situation, but fortunately for us, one of our friends' wives happened to be a liquor rep. Yeah.

So we put in the audible and he shows up with a box. So to speak. Here comes Stormy Daniels. They're playing the clip of her talking to Anderson Cooper on 60 minutes. may know her from. We're all 60 minutes. Was a place packed? It was pretty full.

Yeah. It's Fort Worth, man. So she goes bottomless, too? I didn't think that she's known for. She didn't. They took up everybody's phones, too. Oh, really? Yeah.

She was, you know, there were girls there that would go bottomless, but she was, she had a whole, like, routine. Obviously, she had costumes. She was offering to motorboat opportunities. I accepted. I wasn't going to, it's your opportunity. There was a candle wax routine involved? There was.

Did you go home in your faces? all glittery. It was glittery. It was red, white, and blue whenever I can Yeah. She came out to... I went home with dangling chads all over my face. She did come out to American woman. Yeah, she did. And it was amazing. Yeah. Don't look at current photos, just remember, or whatever. I mean, beautiful woman in all states, but back then she was just riding the high. Really, really, really good stuff. So she will be at Four Corners Brewery. on June 6th.

Yeah. And I'm just super excited about this. One of my favorite bands, I used to go see them quite a bit. It's been a, this is a moment for me, like being able to book them to play. Now, I don't know if, like, Irish travelers also come attached with every booking. No, no. What does that mean? They're my crew.

Yeah. I've told Dan here and there, traveler stories, but these guys. know better, but like they'll, you know, just kind of people that were, you explain it. Have you seen the movie Snatch? Some time ago. It's basically, he's like. Yeah, okay. Gypsy.

Yes. And there's a very concentrated population of these people in West Fort Worth, like White Settlement Area. They always come in town during like the stock show or PBR or Christmas time during Sundance. And they just, the younger ones run grifts like a, through, or four of them coming to a bar, two of them start a fight between themselves while the other two steal all the money out of the tip jars. Like when he's playing, when he's playing, he's had somebody just a fight breaks out and he's all of a sudden, a thousand bucks or whatever's just.

Wow. There'll be like 25, 15-year-olds like dump out of like a brand new F-350. Yeah. You know, none of them of age or anything like that. Just there to wreck your scene, sort of. And then the older ones just convince your grandma that they're going to pave your driveway and then laid three bags of concrete and take the $3,000 check and bounce. It's a thing, dude.

You've seen this before? I mean, it was a thing. They somehow like your music? I think they just come into town. They just play at bars and Fort Worth. They probably do, though. No, it definitely scans. Outlaw music.

Have there ever been a documentary on this? There was a show with Eddie Izard. And I can't remember her name. It was like an FX program where they would just like move into people's empty houses and kind of squat. And I believe that they were travelers. Interesting. The riches. Ooh, squatting.

Remember that was like a thing? You know how political they'll do like a, every now and again there's like a story that you don't really think is happening a lot. But then it blows up as if this is a huge thing. Yeah. Definitely a news tease for sure in the middle of NYPD blue. It's kind of like the house. safe from someone simply moving in and fucking your wife. It's like they're giving a gold card to every immigrant that walks in and a hotel room.

But my mom was telling me that Rose, so Rose has a house in Cleveland and then she goes to visit her daughter in Florida. Snowbird. And she generally stays in Florida longer. Rose had to get up to Ohio because she was concerned about the squatters. She thought she would show up. Yeah, and that there'd be... Somalis everywhere. A couple of Somalians, yeah, just living in there and laughing at her as she tries to open the door.

And the police will be like, I don't know, can't do anything. Looking at a law that just says legal check. Yeah. What are squatters rights? I've always heard squatters rights. Like, what are they? Dude, you'll see these stories. I see them once every few months on local websites.

And it'll be some lady who's in the middle of trying to get her house back. And I don't know. I don't understand it, but it does still pop up. It's like you keep up the utilities for a year. It's yours. It kind of feels like the sort of thing I would not feel bad for somebody for. Like if that happened to you, it's kind of like you might not add your shit together. No.

Opsack might not have been tied enough. So if you're concerned about squatters, well, maybe that has caused your tax bill to go down. Pros. Property tax. But I doubt that that's happened. when's the last time you heard somebody say, hey, look at this. My property tax bill went down this year. The government said we'd like less.

Just on its own. Generally, it's way higher than you expected. Generally, you're like, you know what? Maybe I'm going to fight that and you realize you can't fight it. Not with football season coming. You can with Ownwell. Ownwell.com slash the dumb zone. It takes just a few minutes to sign up online.

There's zero downside risk to the, this because they don't take any money if they don't save you any money. Once they do get their cut, it's lower than the industry standard. Wait, zero writ. So the reward could be untold. There's not really a cap on that. There isn't. Yeah, there is a, the risk is zero.

So if you're one of those guys, always looking for the risk-reward benefit. Ownwell.com slash the dumb zone. We've profited. I got a few hundred bucks last year, saved, total. I guess it was a few thousand off the thing, right? I don't know. Blake, you save money with Ownwell? Oh, yeah.

This is year three for me. And you said property taxes are going up. Mine actually went down. I can see the year by year because I can see when Ownwell. Oh, because of Ownwell. I can see when Onwell entered my life. Right. Naturally on their own, they don't just, they don't go down on their own. No.

They need a little own well, a little push. By the way, you didn't make that jingle. George makes a lot of our jingles. Yeah, I didn't make that one, but I've got a puddle pools in the works. Oh, nice. I was going to tell you, though, that's a secret puddle. Jay J. Jariar over at Coni Roso has requested. Oh, I'd love to.

That's so big time. One of our advertisers and you say, you know what, I'd like a jingle. That's so big time. That's a big get one. That's amazing. That's a big get. They've been given to me for so long. I'm ready to give back.

Conne Roso? Yeah, absolutely. So they'll be out there. Quaker City will be. be out there. Profits and Outlaws. We have some games, some fun games. I don't know if you want to get into that or not. Yeah, go ahead and name those. What are we doing?

The little silver ring that you try to land on a hook. I love that game. That's fun. I love that game. Can we do like the... No, we're going to have family feed. Get one of those big metal... I've got Stormy Daniels. Shut up. I want to get a big metal thingy. Trough.

Trough full of water and ducks in it. Yes. A number on the bottom. Yeah. Wasn't that the dumbest thing ever? So dumb. It's just, and your kid goes right to it. To duck! Yeah.

Yeah. And they're like, well, what do I get to do? Just turn it over. Yeah. Like, that one says one. You guys ever see the cakewalk? Oh, yeah.

Yeah, what was a cakewalk? It's like a circle that was always painted on your blacktop where you play four square and basketball. And you're like, what is this? They use it just for carnival time. Bicycle rodeo. And I think if... I'm going to leave it there 365, but I'm going to use it a one day. I think if you walk on a circle and the song stops and you're standing on

number 16 and they call 16, you get a coconut cream pie. Like a whole cake? Yep. Or pie. Only one person wins the cake, though. Everyone else is the big loser? I don't like that at all. What if we did one with 15 cakes and one person is the loser?

That's so woke. Love that. Or what if everybody gets a cake? Participation cake. You're in elementary school in Halton like I was. You got a two-liter. Dude, I had some cake. Everybody who goes to the GSE will get a cake.

Yeah. I had a little cake last night because. Because something happened that, let's just put it this way, Book Club has a sister, and it's Mahjong night. Oh, yeah. And we were hosting, and by the way, let me tell you something. I should be able to say that word with an accent. If they're going to have me say words like, I should be able to say mahjong, like easily.

Is that how you say it? You should be able to. Is that how it's originally, you have no idea, though? It's a Chinese word. Oh, so you're just saying that's definitely every Chinese word has to be. like, what that? Yes. Okay. Yes, that's exactly what I am saying. Especially if it has Zhang in the title. But yeah, she had friends over. So I scurried off to my little hideout. We got my halal place. And then just went in and had their desserts.

Boy, now that you've had the reno, the mini reno, the major reno. Catch me out here. You have a hideout. You have a place I can just go. Gone. Gone. Fart. You know. Can you imagine if you'd have had that in your down-down days? You'd just be lit. You'd just be waste up there. Yeah, she probably wouldn't have had it over there. She'd probably have been like, this guy's an embarrassment. I don't want to.

No, you'd be passed out up above the garage. It'd be great. You'd be at a red roof end on 121. Right. Yeah, just kicked out of the house. So, yeah, I'd pull the norm. But, yeah, that was a solid night. Look out for that. Bajon's in everybody's life.

What? Did you go to the... dessert place next to the halal place? No, but I have been before. What's it called? Creamery, cremation, crematory. It's fire, dude. Yeah.

No, it's fire. It's like a... Everything over there, I told you guys this a while back. Everybody knows about, like, halal and different sorts of, like, that type of Middle Eastern food. But they have different ice cream. They have different cakes. They got different shit over there.

They're not telling us about. And if you go get treats and lost. Kalinas or Irving. And they're open till like 1 a.m. And you'll go in there at midnight on a Saturday and it'll be like a whole family, 20 people. Party doesn't start till 10. It's so weird, dude.

But I love it. People who play Mahjong want you to think they're smart. I know. Man, Mahjong had a big come up this recently. It was like the third game on your laptop for a while. It's a matching game. Calm down. Yeah.

It really does feel like it's like Jen Rummy with roosters. They put an Asian filter on go fish. The way they walk in, I got mahjong tonight. Oh my God. Do you bring your own board? Yeah. No, it was snooty as hell. It's good. Ownwell is in the mix, too, because I think the Venn diagram of people wanting to save money on property tax. They love Majan. They love Mahjong. Speaking of Snooty, I have a WHL real quick while the boys are here. I put an image in, Clayton. I think, I think Dan once indicated he had very little. familiarity with R-E-M.

Is that when Bob was trying to hype him up to you? I'm just not a music guy in general, as you know. So. But once I found out a little bit of, man, they had some good stuff. Fine. Sure. Michael Stipe is a guy who likes himself some Michael Stipe. And this regarding his new album, a listener sent me this.

He says, one of the songs on his upcoming debut solo album, quote, is the sound of a tree hearing itself for the first time through MIDI. What are we doing? Quote, it's this confusing situation. My friend recorded a tree in my backyard in Georgia, and I played it back to itself. And so it sounds like daff punk, but I'm putting a she shanty on top of it.

The album is out later this year. Is this real? It may be fake. Did the tree listen back in his car to make sure it sounded? Yeah, the tree didn't have headphones on. This bullshit's always on Colbert. No wonder. Axe.

Get them out of here. Yeah, what are we doing? It could be fake, but I don't care because it seemed. It seemed real. Jordan, what do you mic up a tree with? I'd probably, like a UA. I'd probably use, yeah, I'd probably use a small diaphragm condenser. It seems like a Neumann KM84.

Low frequency. Something like that. Now, do you say you bring that up because it's involving music while they're here? Or if we're on the W.HL bandwagon, can I bring one up? Flow with it. It's not music, though. It is a why Hillary lost, but it's a viewer mail, which I was going to save for viewer mail, which is later today. Get it, babe.

But these guys are in studio. How long are you here? What do you got to do? They need to go in like five minutes. What's your bit? We got a big matinee show today. Oh, nice. He doesn't want to tell us.

Oh. Dear Vagina Man. It's non-disclosure. I have a submission for why Hillary lost. The NBA's Twyman Stokes teammate of the year. Award was just awarded to D'Andre Jordan. I'm now just finding out this is a thing. Yeah.

Started in 2012. Can't wait for Dwight Powell to win the award next year. How did he not win it this year? How has he not won it? This is the Spirit Award, right? Yeah, it's just like, Spirit Stick. Like, they tried real hard. This is from Cleburne, Ethan, who has winners by season.

Chauncey Billups, Shame Baddey, Tim Duncan, Vince Carter. Vince Carter. Is it because he's been teammates with everybody in the NBA? Dirk. So it's like end of a career type thing? Dirk in 2017.

Jamal Crawford, Mike Conley, Udana's Haslam in 2020. So that's, right, end of a career type thing. Drew Holiday for three years in a row. Is he a maverick? Wait, who's a maverick? Chris Middleton. That's right.

And Mike Conley. So you searched, the Twyman Stokes teammate of the year annual award that recognizes the league's quote, ideal teammate who exemplifies selfless play and commitment to dedication to his team.

Calling the homies when you got a lady. Tag him in. The award named after Jack Twyman and Maurice Stokes. They played together on the Cincinnati Royals from 1955 to 1958. I swear to God that I am looking at this Wikipedia page, and I have not seen the image yet.

But I'm going to guess that what we have here is a Brian Piccolo Gail Sayers situation where a white and a black were friends. And because of that, this relationship is elevated to another level. Well, certainly, I would say a Brian Piccolo type situation in one way where one guy stays real healthy. Mm-hmm. Oh. And the other guy doesn't. Now, you may be analyzing first names in 1955. And I'm correct.

Jack and Maurice. Brian Piccolo's story doesn't become a movie if they're both black or both white. No chance. So these two played together on the Royals. Stokes, I'm guessing, is the black guy. Yeah. His career cut short after he suffered a head injury from a fall during a game. It's probably a clean attempt at a block.

He was a foul. Non-flagrant. He later became paralyzed. Oh. Due to post-traumatic something, a brain injury that damages the motor control center. Twyman then became, so Twyman, Jack Twyman, became Stokes' legal guardian. What a bro. An advocate until Stokes died in 1970.

What did that paperwork looked like? Do you think he abused the poor guy? I don't. I don't think he was abusing his... Like, didn't... The guy who went on the sub. They can't... Stephen Hawking?

Made the girls reach up. Yeah, dude, math problems just out of reach. Yeah, yeah, no. Didn't his caretaker beat him? Yes. Yeah. She was mean to him. Yeah.

How come everybody gets to beat a paraplegic but me? Also, do you think... They get to park everywhere? There had to be at least a few people that were like, that's a little funny they want to live together like you couldn't have just been clean was it possibly the first gay couple that we're not even

maybe this is the inspiration of Blake's favorite movie Larry and Chuck get married or whatever I now pronounce you Chuck and Larry I'm talking about not a bad movie so we have interracial disabled sports

sports possibly homosexual relationship in late 1950s. Right. How's that not a movie? Let's get Ang Lee on this. Like the view that Norm MacDonald, the first gay couple ever sketch,

it's him and Will Farrell. I don't remember it. Really? It's from Norm's record. It's incredible. It's also set in like the 50s. So he's saying the first gay couple ever. It's him and Will Farrell

at a barbecue in the 50s and they realize they're gay. It's incredible. How is there Norm MacDonald content? I don't know anything about. Yeah. We had a Dutch tour manager that was obsessed with Norm MacDonald, and that's all he listened to for two months while we were over there.

Texas on a Saturday, now, you know that song? They're a worst draws. All right, boys. Well, we really appreciate you coming up. We appreciate you being willing to do this. I'm very, very excited. I make crowd surf. Thanks for having us.

Yes, thank you. We're stoked. Did you get our writer? About the ride. All right. Well, thanks to Sam Anderson, thank you, Jordan George Richardson of Quaker City Nighthawks. And it will be Saturday, June 6th, 4 Corners Brewery, 6 p.m.

And it's brought to us by Community Mechanical. What's their website, Jake? CommunityDFW.com. Okay, so they're our HVAC company. It's very appropriate because the thing at, Four Corners Brewery. Like our main show will be inside. Remember last year?

It's quite hot. Remember Clayton? He was like a puddle by the end. He was just a big, big little, a little tiny lake, I guess, like a constant level lake. But not this year. Not this year, though. No, community dfw.com. You can call or text Travis any time day or night.

He will get back to you a lot quicker than I will or Sam or George will. 469-667-7-290. Ask about the preventative maintenance. That's the big deal. The PM, folks. Got that done yesterday. Did you really? Okay, yeah, I had to reschedule because last week it rained,

and they're like, I guess we can't do, whatever. They got all kinds of excuses over there at Community Mechanical, but, yeah, they're coming out. It was raining, hailing, and a tornado above my house, and the guy was checking everything out. Oh, really? Yeah. Oh, okay, cool.

That's a better copy point. CommunityDFW.com 469-66772-9-0. All right, let's do a little sports. Oh, I thought he'd play your jingle while you were here. Oh, damn it? No, that's good. Whatever.

I'm not saying this. You're going now. Travis and the team real cool. Get it going now. You don't want your house. This is yours. Don't be a bitch. So pick up the phone.

Dan almost died. Get it going now. Get it going now. We are doing our AC set list too. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Nice. It'll be the indoor set list.

We'll play fast ones since we're inside. Hey, did you make this? Y'all can just get up. Hey, did you make this? It seems like they want to hang out. I know, but I also don't want them to think we're breaking. Yeah, we're not breaking. So just leave whenever you want.

I got to go make a puddle pool song. Oh, by the way, June 6th summer event, the first 69 people will show up. We'll get a free piss bottle signed by me. Oh, nice. Sign with a pen or? You have to be there to find out. You ever sign your name in snow? You'll have to be there to find out.

So that's courtesy of community. We'll be giving away 69 piss jars. Per Travis' his request. 69? Yeah. When are you guys going to grow up? Wait to your daughter's like 20 and you have to tell her. About docking.

Yeah. We're doing the 69 thing. No, sports. Big night, bud I don't want the stars to be done I don't want the stars to be done at all It's such a Well what are you going to do

Well I think it's just Try to learn about it Score? Yeah but what's interesting is that It's just the five on five thing They just need a new coach I've tried that Dude DeBoer is just sitting there

What if they went back to him After this season I do think it's, I do think it's kind of interesting that if you follow this stuff at all, the Stars fan typically will be very, very defensive of Robo. But the NHO more at large fan is like this guy's a pussy. And I think Bob was always taking shots because, or people taking shots at him because he is like, not exactly Bob's prototypical hockey player, right? and he got left off of Team USA for these reasons a lot of people thought.

Like they put more workman-like players as opposed to skill players on the team. They win the gold. He's been awesome. And he's been one of the only ones that's been awesome. But him being him is kind of reflective of their whole deal, which is they're just a little too finesse to win at five on five. They've got all these guys. They've got a ton of skill. And that's why whenever I told you guys, you watched the last few games, you know, like, how did this team lose six one?

They have so much more top line skill. I don't mean on the top line. I just mean guys that you have holy shit moments when you watch them. Minnesota has one or two. But five on five, they just grind them out. And that's the thing I think your point about the variance and the playoffs is if you're heavily leveraged on your special teams, you're exposed. because over the course of a long season, that's going to probably play out great.

But over the course of this type of season, you add in puck luck, you add in hot goalie, and now when 40% of your goals have to come on the power play, or shortly after the 10 seconds after a power play, you're aft. And that's the only reason he was hired. Yeah.

The power play. They definitely had some serious drought. Well, that's been pretty good. Well, sure. But yeah. It sucks, dude, because you could feel it. They should have gone up three-one several times in that game four, which would have put them up three-one.

They didn't finish the job. They go to overtime. Another fluke goal. Now you're to game five. Pretty even game, but overall, beaten. And now your season could be over because the NHL, we don't really talk about this when it happened. And I don't even know what there is to say about it.

but I'm very bothered by just blatant unfairness. And the NHL's playoff structure makes no sense. It just, the incentive structure is not there. Like, of all the things that people get mad about, the lottery, and how do we fix tanking and all this and that, not rewarding the top teams with playing the worst teams in the bracket is just stupid. It's stupid unless you have, like, extremely tight schedules where you only play certain team.

But how are they doing it? It's division still. It's like if you win the division, then you're automatically ranked a certain way. Well, same way the NFL does that. Right? Yeah, but you're still playing seeds.

Like the number one seed is still playing the lowest seed. Like the division winners are you're qualified, the top four. Yeah. But the best division. You get home game. Okay, let's say the second best division because they don't have to buy. They're playing the worst wild card team.

So the format, they call, I'll just read this. Top three in each division and two wild cards per conference. So the top three teams in each of the four divisions, so six in each side are automatic. And then the division winner with the best record in each conference plays the lower-seated wildcard team. So Dallas trailed Colorado by quite a bit. points, but they were eight clear of Minnesota, who was in third by straight points. Two is playing three. Right?

Like, it's crazy. The next highest team had 95 points. Minnesota was at 104. There's the avalanche, the stars, the wild, and then nobody else. And those two teams have to play in the first round. So I'm not like, you know, that's what it is, but it doesn't make any sense. And it doesn't make any sense from a league standpoint because of the, The stars are an exciting team with a bunch of players that people know.

And just writ large, I would think in any sport you want those teams to make it further. Yeah. No. And you make money. In general, would want offense to prosper. Yeah. It's weird. But.

So is it tonight? 6.30. 6.30, early one. I got a quick piece of hockey audio for you guys. We could have saved this for viewer mail, but let's weave it in. last couple games have been on ESPN that gets you John Bucci Gras Bucci main

in the in the intermissions and it gets you P.K. Suban as comedic relief. And I actually think P.K. Suban is an interesting guy. I think this is a bad set situation because of the inside the NBAification of studio shows. You could say this probably, I would say this happened

with the ticket somewhat. the 2000s where people are like, we're just going to do that. It doesn't mean you can do that. But the reason we got this is because there's a short word in here. Can Buffalo win their first playoff series in 19 years? Rasmus Dahlin makes it one-nothing on the power play. They were 0 for 39 going back to the reggie season. Go!

It's the playoffs. Oh, no. Reggie. The reggie season. And he really leaned in. They were 0 for 39 going back to the reggae season. season. Now, I'm just going to play you skip ahead about 20 seconds.

Here's how the clip ends. And it's like, we've talked about this before, but everybody wants to make it seem like they're having such a good time that they talk all the way to break. Even if there's no real need to, you know, I'm already buckled in and strapped in. The only thing I got to do is get my popcorn ready. And it'll be ready.

What time's fucked up tomorrow? 7 p.m. Easter. Well, we still got hockey tonight. Speedio. Where's Jake, Tim. Tell me some of those. Second period next from Dallas, Texas. This is kind of a mess.

What is this? I think you're right. I think there's a producer somewhere along the line saying we need more of that. Yeah, just talk to. That does sound cool. Normal, natural. It's kind of like ending on a high type thing. Chuck and Ernie do it?

I think you can do it too. But that's why. That's what he's saying. Yeah. They're all trying to recreate that show. Yeah. Well, go stars. Among all the shows, I do feel like that NHL show does.

I don't hate it. Hope does come closest to recreating that. I guess the old NFL, you know, when Jimmy and those guys are on the top of their game, I don't know that it's like that anymore, but. No, and I've heard good things about Amazon and NBC in basketball too, but Luke is not playing yet, so I don't know. Oh, yeah, the Dirk. The Dirk show, I think is good.

I got a couple of Rangers things, the Cowboys thing, if you don't mind. The Rangers just finished up with the Yankees. They did win the third game of the series. They still can't hit. Man. Hey, did they have one of those situations? The ABS situation? Mm-hmm.

What happened there? So it was a full count. I think you're talking about when Nimmo was at first, Josh Young at the plate. Nimmo is running on 3-2. It was called a strike, catcher throws down to second. tags Nimmo for a strike-mount throw-em-out, but Josh Young did a challenge on the pitch. And so Nimmo claimed that he pulled up because he thought it was going to be a ball or challenged. And, uh...

Okay, that's different. I know. And so we talked about this at the beginning of the year. It's up to the umpires. It's umpire's discretion. And they thought, no way, dude. And so they called them out. Okay.

Yeah. Well, especially it was called a strike, you're saying. Yeah. On the field, it was called a strike. Okay, because I could see if they called it a ball on the field. Right. You could be like, oh, I'm pulling up because it's a ball. Right.

Okay, that's bull. Yeah. All right. The bad bit about the Yankees is they have so many numbers retired that when any new player comes along, he's got to wear number 71. Because they had a prospect pitching yesterday, number 71. They have a fill-in shortstop for right now. He's number 72. And it's just unstable.

It's very unstable. But I kind of like it because it's different. Yeah, I don't know. So that was yesterday's pitcher, not the day before because, obviously, Dan, that one. What? Cam. Cam. Schlittler.

They're young. That's his real last name. Cam Schlittler. Okay, yeah, I've heard of him. Yeah. Why Dan? You guys are idiots. No, the pitcher yesterday, Elmer Rodriguez.

I haven't heard of an Elmer in a long time. How's Elmer doing? I think it's holding on with Latinos. Occasionally. Is he a Latino guy or a white guy? Yeah. I think it's holding on there, but definitely feels Texas. Elmer.

I put a video in there, Clayton. I think Dan is going to like this. The Yankees have a super swaggy second baseman, jazz chisholm. We've laughed at his name before. Former Marlon. He does not pull his hat all the way down. He is doing bits in the batters box. Love watching him play.

Yesterday he had an air pod in. Salty, this guy. He was playing. with an AirPods at second base. Now, I've told you guys before, the kids will play pickup basketball with their AirPods in. Wait a second.

He's not playing a game with an AirPods in. Play the video. He has an AirPods in. On the field. On the field. Those watching can see he is wearing an AirPods.

That feels like illegal. Here's why it's not. He's got an air pod in to listen to pitchcom. So he can... So I guess middle infielers, what they used to do is they could peek in and see, all right, outside, or fastball outside could be coming to me. I got to get ready.

Now with the pitchcom, there are no signs. So he's got an air pod in to hear what pitch is coming so he can be better prepared for what might happen. Up to three infielders can wear a pitchcom device in their hat in addition to the catcher and pitcher. Now most of them do the thing in the hat. He's doing the air pod. The way you know. I don't think they should be able to. Why?

They've been doing this since they introduced the little dial pad on the wrist. I'm not going to say I ever did it, but I did know of people that if you played middle infield, even back to center, if you could see, if you could see off speed was coming, you might shade a little bit to the opposite side. Or if it's a fastball, you might shift over to the pool side. But wouldn't, again, you're trying to have more offense in general. Wouldn't it be like they banned the shift? Yeah. So along those lines, why not just say you can't, no, you're not allowed to know what the pitch is.

Because of the Astros? Maybe, I don't know. But. Huh. Wow, that's crazy. I didn't know that. I don't know if this is up or we just see all of it now, but teams are stealing signs again.

Hmm. Not necessarily stealing, but they can see if, so what they've been able to do is there, There's a lot of pitchers throwing the split finger now. And so they can tell in their glove that if they have switched from the split finger grip, I'm going to raise my right arm, it's a fastball. My left arm, it's an off speed. And I've seen that a lot recently.

So teams are still doing this game. So let the fielder have an AirPod. Did we talk on the show about AZ Fudd first pitch, or is that off the air? It was off the air. Yeah, so AZ Fud throws out the first pitch at the Rangers game. The amount of swagger those girls have is incredible, don't you think? They kind of, I don't know, the way they carry themselves is, reminds me of Michael Jordan or LeBron James. I mean, I love it.

Whatever it is, I love it. Okay. I love the way they talk. I love their, they, she just a smooth em effort. She seems very comfortable in her own skin. Yeah. But yeah, so she's up there throwing out the first pitch. and it just got to another reason possibly things went the way they did.

We've stopped showing the full camera angle of celebrities' first pitches. We only showed – so it showed her like this, and it showed a really bad for – like she didn't know how to throw, like a lot of basketball players. A lot of people. Maybe, but I mean I took like coaching class – I know. When we took baseball coaching in college. Yeah, there's a coach –

There's a class called baseball coaching. You took baseball coaching? Oh, yeah. We had football for sure. Sports science is minor, bro. I was going to be a baseball coach. And then they took us out to the field. Like all the basketball players took baseball coaching

because they figure it's a easy course. And it was. No, but they took us out to the field one day. So you can kind of, hey, he's going to show you the field where this is a field. Let's make some throws from shortstop. and like the best player on Ohio University's basketball team, who was like the best player in the Mac at the time or something, would be at shortstop, throw towards first,

and it would hit the ground before it got to second bait. Like he couldn't get a ball 10 feet in the air. Like you couldn't figure it out. Oh, I know. Just the size of the, I guess the size of the ball, because obviously he could take a basketball and do a half-court pass or something like that. Yeah, the grip on the ball is.

It's just a teeny little... It'd be like, if you're used to throwing a baseball, here's a BB, throw it. Yeah, because I can tell you... He's whole... I can just tell you, right? Like, he's just gripping the shit out of the ball. Yeah.

And you're... But anyway, they don't... But anyway, they don't... They only showed the first part. Yes, they show... It's like we don't want to embarrass them. That's all it is. The whole thing used to be,

hey, I love watching celebrity first pitches because, oh, and especially a basketball, look at how terrible she is at throwing a baseball. It was a humanizing moment. It was a humanizing moment. It was a, oh, I bet they're so nervous. So would I be. I bet they could, maybe they'll mess up.

And, you know, I guess you're right. 50 Cent actually lost his whole estate and had to declare bankruptcy after he had a bad first pitch. We were only watching it for one reason to see it suck. Right. Or sometimes they do cool ones, though. Like when they get the Olympic ladies out there. Cool one. I want to hear about the cool first pitches.

Dude, one of the chicks who do like cartwheels and stuff will like get up there and do like a crazy bit and then like deliver the pitch. What about the one where the sister, the nun? Sister Jean from college basketball. Yeah, she hit him with it. No, I think it's terrible. I think that was a piece of culture that we should hold on to. It's okay to look stupid if you're famous.

Everything is freaking PR now. One more thing from the Rangers game. We had a listener out at the game yesterday who wants us to weigh in. on something. A foul ball was hit into his section. It was hit into a group of Yankees fans. The ball was then handed to a four-year-old boy wearing a Yankees jersey.

The four-year-old, not knowing what's going on, throws the ball towards the field. And it lands in a section of Rangers fans. The guy in a ranger's shirt catches the ball, hands it to his kid. The Yankees fans start yelling at him. Hey! That's our kid's ball.

And started whipping the guy to give the ball back to the kid who threw it. You lost the ball, kid. Well, and learned. It's unfortunate. And you're a Yankee fan at the Rangers ballpark, so. Let's be honest. You're not going to get the benefit of the whistle or the doubt there. Let's just put the parties change affiliations there, right? Right.

What does Yankee Stadium do? Yeah. I like it. I like standing up for ourselves. For sure. There's another angle of the final. fight too. I put it in there if you want to see it, Dan. I mean, it's so, it's insane. It's apparently... Did you get it from DZ? Didn't that DZ?

Dallas, Texas? Yeah. There's 20 different versions. It's from D210 sports. 20 different versions of this of this fight of a Yankee fan, Aaron Judge guy in one row. Now, we see here, what happened was he... Oh, I even saw a different. He knocked

the coke out of the guy in front of him. Yeah, he can't do that. He had a coke in his hand. How about to reach on this guy in red? Yeah. Well, he's reaching down, too. Now, I think everyone, I saw some really weird tweets like Newy Scruggs. NBC5's Newy Scruggs tweeted out. He tweeted out a bunch of lyrics from Big X the plugs song.

Yankee Lady wants to jump in. You're going to want to keep your eye on Yankee Lady. Don't worry. Yankee Lady is very involved here. But, like, I see Rangers fans and Newey tweeting about like, hey, don't mess with Texas, whatever. I'm going to be honest with you. you watch this video, Judge holds his own weight. Now, he's bloodied as hell, had to go to the hospital. Now, watch Yankee Lady in the background, though, here, because they're attending

to her man. Yeah. He's super bloody. She's still going off. Security guards trying to get her out of there. She's going to push at this guy, and he barely pushes at her, but she's on higher ground. Oh, she does a somersault backwards down the cement steps. Yeah. She's got, she's on one foot trying to push a guy that's up above her. And he just goes, get off me. Wow, we got a lot of blood, bro. Yeah, Rangers ended up making a statement. You don't want to go home with that.

He went to the hospital. The bloody Yankee jersey. That guy was transported to a hospital. Oh, and then the lady. And they were all kicked out, obviously. No arrest made. But yeah, you're going to see. The lady's the craziest part, dude, because they think they have her calm down and she's like,

also F you. And he's like, get out of my face. Oh. Oh. Oh. I feel, yeah, a cartoon sound effect there. Yeah. All right.

Man, can you imagine if Jim Knox is still around? The bats may not be back. Here I am with Yankee fans. We got them together. Let's get Foxx. Progressive fade in the game. You need a towel, big guy, wipe up. You're buzzing up face.

All right. All right, Noxie. My final sports thing comes to us from our friends at Fox 4. It's the off season, but it's a great time for shod. to get the boys together and do some bonding. We're putting. We're hitting some golf balls. We're probably going to shoot some baskets.

Maybe play some paintball later. Basically anything but practice effing football is what we're going to do in these months right here. And you know what's bad when the two people at the news desk also comment, shouldn't they be practicing? No. Let's have it over to Fox 4. I believe this is Kylie Capps. Team bonding.

The team hit some golf balls. So now the boys are at the range. And played cornhole among other games. The video posted to Facebook turned into a blooper reel with some missing the ball or breaking the clubs. Players even got a little competitive with each other. Glad to see them having fun. They can do that for another month or so. And then, you know, chop, chop.

Time to get to work, guys. Time to get to work. You want a Super Bowl. Yes. No, I love it. All right. I love it, too. Respect.

That was awesome. That was fantastic. She hit him with, I don't know if you guys got this a lot. My mom was a big Chop Chop fan. Let's go. Chop Chop. And she just hit them with the entire team of the Dallas Cowboy. About a month here, chop chop.

Let's get to work. I don't want to undermine Kylie in her opinions. But yeah, when the female meteorologist is telling your football team, shouldn't you practice in? You haven't won in a while. It's probably not good. That's my market, baby. That's what I want.

I want expectations from the news people. I got a friend who plays for the Dallas Cowboys. He was telling me that looking around Fairlease.org. Was he? That's right. Apparently he's got a kid, another one on the way, and looking for kind of a bigger vehicle. Maybe they could get a lease term that could cover his new contract as well.

Same term, you know, like a four-year deal or so. Anyway, fair lease. Here's the thing. You may be thinking, aw, shucks, all have to be a future Hall of Famer to get treated that way and get great financing from Fair Lease. No, that would be unfair lease. It's Fairlease.org. Click request a quote and tell them the dumb zone sent you or call and ask for Nick or Connor at 972-705, 4815. They will work with you. If you're in a bad lease, they can help you get out of it. If you had, you know, a blemish on your credit related to medical emergency or something like that. like that. They can help you because they're backed by the credit union of Texas, not some big bank. It's fairlease.org. I was right on it there.

That was so good. That's how we should do it every time. So good. Because car stuff is hard, but not with Fair lease. You don't need a dealership, baby. Got a couple quick sports notes here. One, following up on the story,

we at least just gave the details on on Tuesday, and that is that Texas Tech current quarterback, Transfer from Cincinnati, one of the top players in the portal, Brendan Sorsby, announced that he was taking an indefinite leave of absence to enter treatment for a gambling addiction. Nobody knows what's going to happen here. Right now, you can probably assume that his 2026 eligibility is on very thin ice.

Why? Like the NCAA will step in? Yeah. They're investigating whether, This is worth doing suspension over. Why? Like, what if he was an alcoholic and he had to check in for 30 days? Do you get suspended from the NCAA? No, no, it would be more like that the betting itself was a violation of NCAA rules.

When he was a redshirt freshman in 2022, he only played in one game that season. He was betting a lot, like 20, 25 bets a day. Is that illegal to the NCAA? Yeah. Even if he was betting on baseball? That I don't know. Are you saying he was betting on college games? He did.

He bet on his own game. He bet on an Indiana football game. Oh, well then, yeah. Yeah. Okay, now, okay. But I don't know what else he was betting on, but I do know he was betting on that. So they are allowed to, I guess they're actually allowed to bet UFC horse racing and NASCAR. Horse racing.

For real? Yeah. They have that carve out. You're not allowed to bet NFL. You're not allowed to bet basketball, football, whatever. If the NCAA host sanctioned championships, you can't do it. But he did. He did UFC, but he also did college football, MLB, and Indiana games.

And this is like. Mahjong, you can bet that. Possibly. This is, um, it's not exciting enough. This is what they're looking into. Right? This 2022 activity.

got to figure that if that's what they're starting with, there's more. I mean, if he's going to treatment now, if I had quit booze in 2023, and then everyone found out that I used to be an alcoholic in 26, I wouldn't have had to go to rehab then. It would have been like, yeah, sorry, I didn't tell you guys that it's a effed up stuff before, but I did take care of it. What are you going to go to treat before now? It's because you're clearly been gambling the entire time.

So as a Red Raider fan, you're saying, You need a new quarterback. Yeah. And I think they have. Yeah. And, you know, now they're not going to have one like him. I know they have a guy coming in that's supposed to take the reins next, who's like a savior. But this guy's a stopgap, and he's a great stopgap.

I wonder if college teams, you know how NFL teams are like, I'm going to really vet this guy's background because of about to give millions of dollars. Yeah. Do college teams? Big time. Big time. Yeah. But this guy. I know.

But this is a new. territory, dude. I doubt they were asking five, six years ago, gamble. Now they know that it's everywhere. It wasn't a thing that you had to ask, you know, when my brother went to college, they would tell you, but you couldn't gamble. You know, like not, it wasn't available. But yes, definitely they are going through your social and these kids know now. You see a prospect social media now. It's high and tight. It's not a bunch of inward. It's not a bunch of. As a college kid, you're probably allowed to hire an agent then, right? Or no? Yeah. You're allowed to hire an advisor?

Definitely. You have an agent. I mean, that's why all these... Okay, so the agents are telling them. Hey. You didn't hear the word the coaches came up with this summer. We're tired of these street agents. What does that mean? I feel like it means a guy who's not a white lawyer. It means that there's a guy who's like, hey, I'm such and such as agent. It's his uncle or his cousin. And they're like, I don't want to deal with this guy. He didn't know what he's doing. But really, it's that the other guy. knows how to screw the kid just as much as you do, and you've worked this out together over the years. Yeah.

So we're past the era of going through athletes' old Twitter or tweets. I was going to say now that you have an agent, you... They're scrubbing it. They're telling them, even when they're going into the portal. When I used to go to APEC out there, it used to be when you get drafted, right? And they would train high school kids and we're trying to get into college, and they would, I was like, dude, you've got to get all these kids. Because they would do life skills stuff.

You know, they would do like, here's how you get a house and here's how you're going to make your schedule. And I would tell him, I'm like, got to get a foul guy. And I would tell him, wipe their social media. Nobody knows yet. We've come a long way on that, yeah. Doubtful anybody will be entering the All-Star game,

and it'll be the first time we find out they used to tweet the end word. Josh Hater. Like Josh Hater. I know this is a part of it, but it was very funny. So Sorsby enters in rehab for sports gambling, and then the line for Texas Tech to win the Big 12 moved immediately. Markets got a market. Never sleeps.

It was really funny to see that in some articles, like the next paragraph. Yeah. Goes from a plus. The whole thing is insane. Gambling's interesting to me because I really like talking about it. I just don't like doing gambling. You like analysis, you know? You're like thinking through probabilities, and that's interesting.

Yeah. But I actually don't like to put a bet down and put much. money on it. As bad as I am with money, you would think that I don't gamble money. Like, you guys know, I gamble five, ten dollars at a time, for real. Yeah, when I do, it's not going to be a $5. Let's go through your betting history, though. What do you mean? Baker to win MVP, Mike Tyson to beat Jake Paul, Tiger Woods to win the Masters. You're not making smart bets. No. Wait, what are you saying? Those are good odds. Good value. I always seem to lose. It reminds me a dirty work. When I do hit one, it's going to pay.

pay for all of those. That's the point. When Chevy Chase is getting his ass beat by bookies and Norm's like, well, what was the bet? And he's like, took Mr. Teague against rock. Great value. Yeah. What a hit. I got a cowboy note.

This is just something I was thinking and wanted to bounce this off of you guys. Did you see the Caleb Downs fan interaction? Was it outside the star? Was it a guy saying, the next Darren Woodson? Were they asking him his top Mother's Day gifts?

I thought it was the next Ed Reed. Next Ed Reed, that's what it was. Somebody had said something to him. That's right. It's just a guy, too. That's so weird to me. Like a fan. I would never do that. Like, I hope you're the next Ed Reed, something like that. And, okay, so this really bothers me.

And it probably says more about me, but I'll go ahead and say it anyway. Then he says, hey, I'm just going to try. try and be Caleb. And then the media collectively finishes. And they get a towel and they clean up and they go run and write their stories because they can't believe this. This is so great. If he's going to be the next Edry. He's going to be the next Caleb. He's his own player. Yeah.

Let me tell you something else too, in my opinion. If you can be, have people enough military to where people say, you can military background and family and enough coaching where they'll say that too. Because in anything you do after that, it's like halfway just fine, people are like, that's why he makes that bed. Military coach. He can see it in him right there. See how he got here five minutes early. He puts his towel in the dirty laundry. They don't all do that. No. I'm like, yeah, all right. See how he's in the right place on the field? These articles are going to mention it.

Dad's coach. Now, it's just the whole lapping. It's so repeatable and it's repeated. We've had this before. This is not new. In fact, it's such like, what was Costner's name in that movie? Crash Davis, like would have told him, all right, when you get asked, what player you're let, you know, you say you're yourself, you're your own, like you want to make the net.

It's so cliche and just, we've seen it so many times yet. It happens again, and everybody acts the exact same. the media, the fans, applause, standing ovation, I can't believe it. This is a guy right here. This is a guy. Yeah, there's certainly something to... The guy who had never heard of Darren Woodson.

I can't wait to write my Darren Woodson story. How he inspired him is growing up. Oh, gosh, darn it. It's part of the whole deal, man. I like participating in it. I don't like it to make it like the meat of what we do, but projecting what we think about these people and what they would do and this and that situation is a big,

I guess a big part of why the league makes some, the money that it does is that it's a soap opera. So you got to create the character, right? And so now, wait till he like, you know, when he spears somebody and costs him a game, he's just a psychopath out there. And they're like, God, he was, I mean, that's just so out of character. Right, no.

He's so out of character. It's like, this guy's a psychopath. He's a pro football player. Let's be real with ourselves. I'll go to Viewer Mail or? I'd love it. You got to know more sports. Okay, so viewer mail today will be brought to us by Qualis Roofing.

Also, a key sponsor at the DZGSE, the generic summer event, which is going to be June 6th. But QualisRoofing is at QualisGC.com. They don't have one of those crazy websites where they add the dumb zone at the end because they know you'll tell them. You heard about them on the dumb zone. You can call 817, 500, 900, 908. They're OG advertiser. They actually replaced my roof, yours? Yep.

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They would say, easy as pie. Never understood it. No, but I get it now because I hadn't seen a pie, simple pie in forever. You know, you look at what they've done. I always thought pie would be really complicated. You ever see like the one where they put the crisscross pattern over the apples? Yeah, what is this? Wrigley Field.

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And hoops, you know It's all there Boy, I got a lot of support on Miss Piggy, folks. I wasn't the only one, apparently. Damn confirmed with that day. What do you think? She's hot? Just that she almost existed to make you horny and make you want to be with her.

Like, you know, and then a lot of people pointed this out, OJ included. Like, they would make, they would have some of the human guest hosts kind of fawn over her. And like they intentionally made her fat. Big jugs. Yeah, they made her like a pig. Right. But my point is they didn't pick for the female lead. They didn't pick an animal that you might that's viewed as like attractive.

Okay. Like a nice rabbit. They picked an animal that is thought of as kind of like. A deer. Right. Blake wants to have sex with a deer, he just said. You don't? Yeah, dude.

I didn't say. I didn't. Cartoon deer where you're like, whoa. What are we doing? What are we doing with that? But yes, Miss Piggy was there to make you understand that. ain't nothing wrong with a big woman. I wonder if...

Kermit's thigh sick over there. You know, I've talked before about like, is it the normal population? Like, is the general population a bunch of dwebes, or is it that writers are the dweeps? And then they write a lot of movies about the dweeb that gets the girl or does some, you know...

It's a good question. So I wonder if the writers... You know, we're there some big girls involved in the... I hope so. The casting of Sesame Street or whatever that show was. Or a guy who liked them. Just a guy who liked the big lady? It was the 60s.

I imagine, you know, Kermit's a little skinny guy. That seems to track quite often for whatever reason. Want a sports one? Cowboys? Yeah. This is about the draft. Charles emailed and he said, you often hear you can't grade a draft for at least three years. Therefore, the 2023 draft should now form the team's backbone

and give us an idea about what to expect from them this year. So without further ado, I present possibly the worst draft in the history of the Cowboys. And see at the bottom for some links, you could see people's hot take grades immediately after the draft. So if I would remind you, I don't know, maybe you give a grade when I say first round Mazzis Smith. Ouch. Yeah, I mean... Great is outch. Second round, Luke's schoonmaker.

My opinion is the... Keep going and I'll tell you. My grade is the R.Vell Reese. Oversown is a third rounder. Had to get a hurt player somewhere. Viliami Fahoko in the fourth round. Zero snaps in the NFL.

Awesome. him, Richards? He's okay. He played a little, but they're replacing. 220 career snaps with the Cowboys. Eric Scott Jr., sixth round. He was supposed to be locked down. Dallas traded their 2024 fifth round pick for him to get that sixth round pick.

Zero career snaps with the Cowboys, zero snaps in the NFL. He just didn't get a chance. Sixth round compensatory. Deuce Vaughn. Seventh round, Jalen Brooks. Okay. NFL.com grades it a B-plus. CBS Sports gave it an A-minus,

Yahoo Sports, a B-minus. Read the other one. They love the Deuce Vaughn pick. PFF. What did that one say? What did they give it? I think they gave it a C-plus. And maybe it could have been a C-V-E.

because they don't fall for the combine. No, because it's the same thing we talked about the other day. And I got a bunch of emails from like our statistician people too that, you know, the, you know, if you have a bunch of people go guess the weight of a cow at the fair, nobody's going to get it exactly right. But once you increase the sample size enough, everybody's going to be like clustered almost exactly too correct. The wisdom of the crowd.

Go back and look at that. draft and I did in fact I got crazy and I ran every pick for the last 10 years and looked at where they were picked and where the consensus big board had them and yeah just like with stocks you can try to beat the board and take a risky play and get major value out of it but if you nine times out of 10 you won't and the night they drafted mazie the night they drafted Luke schoonmaker in particular everybody was like this is a bad idea. Everybody. I don't remember a single person outside of the Cowboys room on any of those picks. And I'll tell you something else. Just about every time they've done that, it's gone that way.

There's not a single one that I can think of. Tyler Smith. Tyler Smith has been pretty good. But again, it's a low leverage position. You know, it wasn't, I don't know. It was still the first round. I don't know. It doesn't work out that often. What I'm saying is that PFF grades the draft based on the board and then the net, you know, they're using numbers. Now, if anything I would say what they should do, maybe is weight the picks, like the higher ones higher. And if you don't like the top three picks, then there's no way you can get a C plus if you like Deuce Vaughn and Jalen Brooks or whatever the case is. But when you try to beat the board, you will fail. That's my general opinion.

I just think in general, though, it's funny the Cowboys got a B plus and A, all the... I don't think you can get lower than like a C. You're probably right. You know, afterwards, every team is really stoked. I mean, go to... Do a fantasy draft and interview everybody right after the draft. You're really proud of what you've done. You're roster baiting.

Even if you didn't get the main guys you had targeted, you're pretty sure you did pretty well after that. same with every single NFL team. Have you seen one room when they make a pick? Besides like Kevin Stefansky last year. Sean McVeigh this year. Right, there's just a couple. But generally they're all high-fiving, they're hugging because they all just nailed it.

They've all nailed every pick in the draft. Like they're still high-fiving and hugging in the sixth round. Yeah. They're all very confident that they're all very confident that they got them all right. You're right. But I just in general, you're right. I think this guy's point is like,

oh, you guys always say the draft's fine. We never really look back at it. Well, like Downs is a player that they got value on. It would be very surprising if he doesn't work out. It was not surprising when Mazi did not work out. I got a name rating for Jake. Oh, yeah. I want to spell it out for you.

C-E-H. V-Y-N. Again, C-E-H-V-Y-N. Seven. Seven. That's it? No way. My first guest was Kevin.

Ah, yeah. His child's name is seven. C-E-H-V-Y-N. Way too much. Way, way, way too much. I'm going to give you a couple anchor words here from Garrett that are both almost certainly on. the list amuck and aleck yep yep have we done aleck yeah smart on um but i'm sending this to you because

garrett found an email that he sent me in 2015 which was the first time that the uh little side pile i do with tc it's just banter ever introduced the cheese or oral hypothetical and garrett is a doctor and he says uh i don't know i don't don't really know what that has to do with this other than, you know, he knows how the body works. He said the trend I have observed and that has continued is that when most, with most men deciding they want to be able to eat cheese while most women would gladly give up cheese. We at first believed that women misunderstood the question as to them thinking they would be receiving oral all the time.

Further probing and questioning, though, has led to a stark realization. When comparing the experiences of penetrative and oral sex, the feet, the feet, Feeling is roughly the same for the male, i.e. placing his penis into a warm, moist, tubular structure. Yay. Giving up one experience while still having the other on the table. Not a huge sacrifice for the male. The female experience of penetrative and oral sex, however, is quite different, I have

found. Women have such a ridiculously better time when receiving oral sex compared to being rammed by their chosen male counterpart. They would not give it up. In fact, I had one woman admit to me she would give up anything other than alcohol rather than give up receiving conalinguists. What was her name? Not alcohol. I mean, he was like 30 at the time and going to the bar all the time.

But that is an interesting one. If you think the female side of it, because if you're a dude and you're saying, yeah, no cheese, whatever, it's like, yeah, I'll just have sex. I got a bad beat for you This is Comes to us from Twitter And from a female In there, Clayton She saw this on the back of a truck

Apparently Shred Tech's logo Looks like boobs Yeah, a couple diamonds with circles around him Two targets Yeah And driving down the road Kind of getting horny I think there's enough there

Yeah, absolutely Got me thoughts It'll be brought to us by Early Bird CBD. Dumb Zone 20 is the discount code, single-use discount code, 20% off on Earlybirdcbd.com. This is not your grandpa's CBD, Blake.

It doesn't use that word. No, it doesn't use that word, and it has THC. It does. So if you've got to get drug tested at work, maybe it's not for you, but if you're good on that, then you'll get two and a half milligrams of THC in each gummy,

a nice little dose to get you started with there. they taste good. You feel good and you don't pay full price. When you go to earlybird CBD.com and use DumbZone 20. Dear Uncle Hotbox. A few gummy thoughts for this early bird pride week. I think this is last week. 420.

They had a 420 sale. I just learned there's a Fox game called 99 to beat, which Wikipedia says is also known as The Beat, hosted by Ken Jong and Aaron Andrews. He says, so a man who rose to prominence by showing his Pee is co-hosting the beat with a woman who rose to prominence by being a peepee. Very nice. That's great. I can't say that I'd ever thought of the other side of peeper.

The Peepee. The Peepee. That's one. Gummy thought? Pretty good. Very good. Sam also has. Not enough of him is made about the 69th overall draft pick.

We've got Jason Witten, Cooper Cup, and Russ Grimm all selected there. High value spot. Keep an eye on that one. Okay. And his last one is this. In a seven-game series, how many wins would Blake's softball team get? versus the 1899 Cleveland Spiders. The worst Major League Baseball team ever.

They were 20 and 134. From a time when they threw 75 mile power fastballs and every other guy died from rickets. Rickets. Versus a bunch of dudes full of microplastics. That's true. Playing baseball. I'd need to see some video of the 1899.

I can tell you one thing. Those boys are going to want it more. than Blake's team. No doubt. Those are real men. Let's see. I've got a follow-up. We played you the Ottawa Senator's playoff song

that was not received well, even by the team. This was tweeted out by the team account after the Senators fell down 2-0 in the series. They sent that kid to Taiwan to get him away from Ottawa. Okay, that's... Kyle, I've been here.

As you can see, I am in Asia. This is not AI. I am actually here. I have been sent here by the Ottawa Senators organization because they wanted me as far away from the Canadian Tire Center as possible before game three tonight. As most of you know by now,

I've become a bit of an internet celebrity over the past week and not in a good way. The video that was intended to share my joy and passion Yeah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. They're kind of doing both, though. They're doing a joke about how, like, wouldn't it be funny to get him as far away as possible, and then also having him talk about how his feelings are heard.

So that's weird. Pick a bit. But thanks to Adam for that. And then I have a piece of snail mail. All right, because then I got a pee. Oh. It's been a long time, right? I guess.

I guess I'm done. This, uh, I thought I was. This comes to me from Argyle, Texas. Okay. up here I have a nice little pouch with the UIL symbol on it

let's see what's in here oh it's a gold medal wow guess what play by play guy got a gold medal you got a state championship gold medal

sent to me by coach Westmoreland and his staff incredible you deserved it buddy You earned it. You shaved the mustache, which allowed them to win. That's right. I'm not being creeped out by you.

So thanks. But you're always sucking up to the UIL. To get a gold medal. That's right. Congrats. All right. We particularly enjoyed your thoughts on saving gas money. Could you recap that for audience on the best way to cut costs as gas prices

continue to sorghage? Well, basically what you do, you just fill it up on a half a tank. That way you don't have to fill up the whole entire tank. So it only costs half as much then when you go to the gas station, right? Right. Now don't you go twice as often, though? No, I don't. I go once a week.

All right. And how often did you go when you would fill up the whole tank? Once a week. Yeah, Bob. Well, do you drive further? Nope. Huh. Don't you understand?

I'm trying. You're listening to The Dumb Zone. So at the end of today's show, I will bring a couple of more viewer mails. Okay. I'm teasing it for then. Dealing with something Jake brought up at the end of another recent show. I'm possibly going live audio for everyone every day. Feedback very positive

But I guess that blows the tease Some people told Dan to Have you read my emails Have you read my emails? No I saw some that were copied to both of us Also someone wanted me to tell Foody CK

Because I can't find his contact On the substack or website or whatever Dairy Queen Has a new fruity pebble shake Oh damn Chocolate covered donut blizzard or a cinnamon

French toast cone dip. DQ's innovating. Are you an ice cream guy? I've never seen you eat a big pile ice cream. Foodie CK, that is. I'm more a picture of meat.

Yeah, the dessert is a special occasion thing. Okay. Well, this guy, Tim, hit me up on the substack, said I can be the official DQ representative as I own just one. Wow. And I have for all my life.

Wow. Where is this one? I'm going to have to find out. Actually, he might have replied back to me, and I haven't looked at Dumbzone lately. He'll get a hunger buster from him. I like the belt buster, just to let you know. DumbZone.com is our website.

steak finger basket extra gravy and if you go to dumbzone.com oh we got a link there for the GSC we got our events page we got the promo codes if you're like ah what was the thing with puddle pools go to dumbzone dot com there's a little promotion for you and I have a follow-up email for Jake Uncle Daniel I heard you guys talking about Gary Condit in the Chandra Levy case the other day.

Remember this? Of course. I went down a deep rabbit hole on it a few years back. Honestly, the September 11th attacks ended up being a yay boo for Condit. The yay was that he disappeared from the news cycle almost overnight. But the boo is that the real story never really fully landed. Ingmar Gwondique was identified as the person responsible, yet barely any media attention compared to the earlier speculation.

Because of that, a lot of people believe Condit somehow got away with it when 9-11 happened. In reality, he was cleared, but his public perception never recovered. Anyway, keep cranking hog. Hell, crank each other's hogs from Ryan. Here's the problem, Ryan. Ooh. Oh, no. And it's not one that I like. A new segment called Here's the Problem, Ryan.

But I didn't make the rules. I'd like to mark that, Beth. I didn't make these rules. If you have an affair with an intern, you're married, you're nailing this chick on the side. Go on, yeah? Someone murders her. Oh. Kind of whatever happens to you public perception-wise after that.

So he was having love? Oh, yeah. He was definitely hooked up. Okay, there's no doubt of that. Yeah, 100%. Yeah. Now, then she was found to be murdered. That's why they were looking at him.

And so he's like, why is everybody looking at me? We're just... What's going on here? Like, well, bud, you fish in those waters. There might be sharks in there. I don't know. Don't you just kind of think? That's a high stakes game, bud.

I'm a big politician. I'm married. I'm going to nail my intern. Okay. I've heard of this before. I don't think it usually goes well. You think she's a real stable person? Well, that's the ones you hear about it didn't go well.

Don't you think these things happen all the time? Don't you think there are more that you don't hear about than that you do? Without a doubt. But that's the point, though, is that when you go into it, much like trying to beat the board in the draft. There's a small chance you will. But I don't know. I think, I don't know if there's more or not,

but I know there's a risk involved. And that's just kind of how he's got to wear that. I have things that are back. Maybe. I want to read this whole story. This is from L. Says hello. Apparently, reverse circumcisions are all the rage.

Yeah, I've been reading about this. Oh, you guys are just nodding. Yeah. It's a thing now. I just learned of this. Well, because I, yeah. He says, great opening sentence in this article. And from, and then it says appropriate enough, the publication is called The Cut.

The New York Magazine. Quote, Daniel Floyd loves a long, droopy, foreskin. But his own was cut off when he was a baby. L says I recommend letting the lady AI read this to you. So you guys already knew that Foreskins are back and I'm sitting over here like, oh, cool, this is going to be great info for these guys. Well, no, I don't know. I've heard of this.

I've heard of, I don't know if it's like a cultural thing of the, from what I gather, it's that like you didn't make the choice to be circumcised. Right. And so now you want, you want to, you want to be a. disgusting boy. I don't know. I mean, TC had to have it done twice.

He'll brag about that. He had to take him back in when he was... Because his hog is so giant? So giant. You want to do some news? I do want to do some news. I did want to ask, do you want to... Should we promote what we have behind a paywall tomorrow?

Are you happy about the guest? Do you feel like that's something people would want to know? I am, absolutely. Yeah, tomorrow joining us, we'll be at Emu Tom's house out in the country and unsurprisingly, he's buddies with Dale Hansen.

He lives out and walks of hatchie, so we're going to have Dale coming out for the show. I was telling my wife the other night, I just said, because we were looking at the weather for the week and complaining. I hope everybody's complaining.

It's like 50 degrees, 99% chance of rain tomorrow, Friday. And so I'm complaining about that. And then I complained. I wanted to complain more. So I said, also, I got to drive to Waxahatchee. We're doing the show from Waxahatchee that day. And she goes, ah, and the only thing she knows about Waxahatchee, because we looked for houses there once.

Edward R. Burrow. Yeah. She's like, uh, maybe you'll see Dale Hansen, like she was joking. I said, I will absolutely see Dale Hansen. She goes, oh, you love Dale? And I go, yeah, yeah. I drive through the rain for him. I'm trying to do something, to be honest with you.

I just don't even know what that means. You're excited about it? I'm trying to position that you're not pissed off to have to go to the show. Yeah, yeah, no, I thought you were bringing up something else. I'm just an idiot. You're okay. I don't know. Anyway, yeah, Dale Hanson will be on the show tomorrow.

The news will be brought to us by hello. Fresh. Meal prep, the easy way. They deliver it right to your doorstep. They deliver the meals. You don't have to go out and buy a pinch of this or a one-eighth centimeter of this or that. Now with Hello Fresh, they deliver the ingredients right to your doorstep there. So you're not having to go to the grocery store.

You're not having to make decisions on what to eat for dinner tonight, tomorrow night. Just put it on autopilot. They deliver this right to your doorstep. And then you can still enjoy. the joys of cooking. Hellofresh.com slash DumbZone 10 FM gets free 10 meals. Plus free neutral bullet ultra plus two and one compact kitchen system,

$188.99 value on your third box. Free meals applied is discount on the first box. A neutral bullet? New subscribers varies by plan. Disclaimer must order the third box by May 31st. So that's a pretty sweet little deal there. Here's Jane with the Dumb Zone News. Like what's coming?

You ever see that on a? Oh. Yeah. And I think... Because I just make my own. Yeah, me too. I found out the other day that... Isn't Pepriko just ground up red pepper? Is it? Yeah, it's just like ground up cayenne. Yeah, I think so. It's all it is. But they'll give you like just the right amount.

They will at HelloFresh. All right, we're going to start with, this is kind of throw down newsdesky, but it's all over Twitter. All right. We have a 37-year-old woman who is an executive at J.P. Morgan, Dan.

Keep going? I like where we are so far. She has been accused in a lawsuit by a former employee he was married. That he was being forced into non-consensual

and humiliating sexual acts with her. Now you can put up her picture there if you want. Oh. Clayton. She's, what's her name? For the audience.

For the people. Lorna Hadini, H-A-J-D-I-N-I. Let me put it to you this way if you're following along with no visuals. This woman looks a lot like Diana Rossini.

If you see them next to each other, they have very similar faces, And I believe Dan once described that face as looking for it. Paraphrasing. But this woman was in charge at JP Morgan. And she had, it's so weird. The internet's loving this because it was an Indian guy. And the whole joke on the internet is like,

oh, Indian guy finally gets to Bob Zen Vajin. And he doesn't, now he's got to sue somebody. He doesn't know what to do with it. But he's married. And these allegations say that he would make sexual advances or she would make sexual advances on him, insisting he was not interested. She replied, do you want to get promoted at year end or not? Do you want a future at J.P. Morgan?

It's that simple. I don't know why you're fighting this. She then allegedly removed her shirt, began fondling her breasts, and racially insulted Doe's wife. Okay? this is probably made up, but in his lawsuit, he says that she says, with her top off, I bet your little Asian fish head wife doesn't have these cannons, which, you know, the main question in the group chat was like, is this woman 37 or 97? Like, first of all, canons.

And two. Canon. I like canon. Dave Ruff had the idea when we realized everyone was like, I'm like, I'm not. never heard of fish head his line was yeah none of us have we weren't on the hocheemen trail like what sort of asian insult is that did you not see grand terino fish head is an Asian insult yeah okay i mean it feels like something okay well Clint eastwood knows it i wouldn't have thought the hot jp morgan exec did not a lot of canon pictures though popping up well he was forcing her to

she was forcing him to suck her toes and do all sorts of office sex slave stuff. One such instance, Hageni dropped her pen on the floor next to his desk, and while bending to pick it up, rubbed his leg, squeezed his calf, then remarked, oh, did you play basketball in college? I love basketball players. They get me so wet. Yeah, twice the man claims that she propositioned him for oral in the sex. on one occasion asking

birthday BJ for the brown boy my little brown boy we have an opening right for what what should want to do anything for pen picker up her I drop my pen all the time the man claims

she admitted to drugging him using date rape drugs during one encounter she allegedly berated him because he cried while she was performing a sex act on him him against his God, man.

Oh, man. How come everybody gets to cry while getting a... I want to spin it this way too. I'll give up cheese for that. This is another area where the, again, the male, maybe the white straight male loses, is it, you know?

I know, we all laughing. We're all laughing at this. This is a very serious. And there's no place for this. Call my wife a fish head. All right, I have, oddly, a boatload of grapevine news for you guys. The first one, Grapevine's baseball team, two-time defending state champions,

were set to start the playoffs last night. Oh, no. Going for a historic third title in a row. I don't think that's been done since like the late 80s, when they announced that they had been informed their season was over. They have been accused of playing an ineligible player in some of their games, and the vacation of those wins makes them playoff ineligible. Now, I did know the Grapevine's baseball team was awesome because I recently found out, I think you were probably paying attention to the Aggies at this time, Dan, but the Aggies used to have a big boy running back, which, what can you love more than that? Corell Buckhalter, Natron Means, and in this case, Jivorsky Lane.

The A-Train. and his son, Javorski Lane, Jr., transferred to Grapevine a couple years ago. He's a baseball player, so he took the, hmm, which one of these sports? But that happens, and it happens everywhere, and it's not illegal. It may be unsavory, but it's not illegal. And they've won two state championships in a row. So most of their team was returning. I've been told that they're much.

might maybe have been a player on the team that lived in the city, but that administration didn't finish his paperwork. They didn't own a house there, but he lived in the city and went to that school. I'm not even positive there was a violation, but they are looking into something. And if they're looking into it, your winds are vacated while they look into it. So even if they find nothing, where they can't come back and play last night's game.

I've been told that there was a parent of a JV player and some JV players get put on the playoff roster for like for the state UIO roster and not all of them do and that there was a parent

who was very upset that his kid had been left off and he thought I think I've heard about a little something that might be a problem for somebody and he called the star telegram the coach didn't know it was coming didn't tell the coach first so that may not be true

the call is often from inside the room or house right it's crazy that's how that south like quarterback got busted a few years ago definitely it was the backup quarterbacks one of the greatest achievements of my brother's life is uh so he was starting as a sophomore uh in high school at quarterback

and a kid moved in with a coach dad some big like huge cannon arm dude It was like a year older, and that kid ended up moving because he couldn't beat him. It was like, this dude moved in to be like, oh, you guys need a quarterback, we'll take. So they were scouting high schools knowing which ones had a young quarterback. He was a sophomore. Yeah, senior left last year. And so they're like, all right, well, what's this team's deal?

The dad got on and the dad ended up leaving. Wow. Suck it. Way to go, Joe. Also from Grapevine, a Chick-fil-A employee. I'm assuming this is the one I go to. I don't know, every single day. In November 2025, police recorded an employee at that store, stealing via refunds about $80,000.

He used the register to ring up 800 orders of mac and cheese trays and then refunded them to his personal credit cards. And it is all super on camera. I mean. So what's the scam? How does he do it? I guess you, like when you pay for something, it doesn't have to, if you're like, oh, we need to refund that order, it doesn't have to go back to the original card. So maybe he's using other people's cards or maybe he's. Quick scan. Yeah.

And just like, oh, if there's an issue, maybe there isn't even an issue. Just like, oh, that needs a refund. You don't even have to know. But when it refunds, it goes to his card. so while someone ordered something else he would do a quick thing well it's it's because that's kind of smart it's tough to tell because in the video he's kind of in there by himself so i don't know specifically what time this was but he's he's it right at the register they got him on camera and he did it all like in a pretty short amount of time 80k he can't steal from one you can't

steal like that anymore no there's just no there's no chance there's just too many cameras woke Yeah, think of how much easier it was to steal Oh my God Back when America was great Cash Yeah, the cash, the people at the carnival Sure

I definitely pocketed some money here and there Being a young, no, young radio guy Put on promotions But you know what, you got to work this Saturday For the country music station and you're going to put you in promotions and you've got to take money for parking. And you're going to stand out here in this 100-degree dirt parking lot

and just breathe in the fumes and the dirt all day. But, hey, just collect the money and then just give it to us, okay? Who's the dummy if I didn't take some money, right? Without a doubt. It's a little, not a lot. I mean, when I was working at a – I've told you, a grocery store. But $100 to a kid is – Minimum wage at the grocery store.

If I eat, I'm going to be losing money. Right? If you're making 725. Yeah. So we would take food all. I mean, that was just, that was a deal. But now. The deal I made, the day I bought this thing.

It's sad. It is sad. It's sad. Kids can't steal anymore. One more from the uppity burbs. This one's popping off big. Because there's a woman named Amy Smith. I followed her for a while on Twitter.

She runs a website called watchkeep.org. and her bit appears to be doggedly trying to expose schools and kid-affiliated organizations that have hired someone with a past criminal sexual child-related history. Because as we know, it happens every day. That somebody, you know, every day, somebody's getting hired or brought on. and the other district doesn't have to say why they got fired. This lady does that. Thankfully.

And one of the reports she found was that there's a 46-year-old guy. He's a former Houston Astros prospect. And he is the head coach of a sort of a, it's like a homeschool baseball team. So you'll get those, right? Like the Texas Home Educators Sports Association will put together teams of homeschool baseball team. schooled kids. And this is going to become even more of a thing with the vouchers. You're sure we didn't do this on the air. I swear to God we didn't, dude. Okay. The chat will tell us if it did. Clayton would know.

Okay. So he was coaching the team out of Fort Worth. He had, he was also operating an indoor baseball and softball facility in Keller. He's also a registered sex offender in the year of 2030 because back in 2010 when he was 31, he was charged with online solicitation of a minor, meaning communicating or distributing sexually explicit material. The child was 14. He also had previous domestic violence and assault convictions in 99 and 2000. Wait, so what was the charge with the minor? The 14.

Online solicitation of a minor. So he's trying to hook up, trying to get pictures, sending pictures, and there was a real person. Like he knew they're 14. They were 14. Okay, they purported to be 14 or whatever. Could have been a sting, but the sex offender registry actually lists the age. So he has to do that every year. Okay, so they hired him as part of this organization,

and their initial, I guess, cover was that they provided a waiver to any student athletes and their parents that were going to be around Coach Tommy. and it was a waiver that was about his testimony. And it said, Coach Tommy can speak firsthand about the dark shadows of sports, especially professionally. He himself, a talented athlete, spent many years praising himself and feeding his flesh.

The Lord so graciously refused to let the world have him and rescued him from his sin in a tremendously dramatic yet necessary way. Now he pours his time into young men, helping them navigate this tricky culture with Christ. Before you commit to his leadership, check out his testimony here. And then you, yeah, hey, this guy, I had trouble. I think Danny said he saw he acknowledges like porn maybe.

But nowhere does it say this guy's a sex offender because he was trying to hook up with a 14-year-old. It doesn't even really hint at that unless you want to say feeding his flesh. Like that could read as like, here's how he stay at a strip club. Yeah. So this is. has made big waves. Obviously, the guy's been fired. But the bigger waves is that the former mayor of Southlake, who was recently trying to run for a district seat here locally and got trounced by a union leader, he was in charge of this deal. Like, he's on the board. And, you know, this is a guy who's all in

big swinging deal over there, politics. And so now he's, him and his wife have both had to resign from this board, which is funny because then people go dig up his past. And I remember hearing about this a few years ago. He's a couple years older than me, but he got in pretty major trouble at A&M for a hazing thing when he was in the core. John Huffman? Really? Yeah. Like to the point where a lot of, I mean, I went back and read A&M articles about it at the time. People wanted him kicked out badly. But I think they were parents of the kids who got A's. So yeah, there you go. Good dude. Good dude. I got a video in there for this one, Clayton. This one comes to us from San Antonio Six Flags, Fiesta, Texas. You guys know the big swing ride. You're up there. Love the swing ride. 200 feet in the air. Well, the ride at Fiesta, Texas was stopped for about 10 minutes at 200 feet. Oh, can you imagine? Dude.

Oh, this is the high, high, high one. I like the little swing ride. Not the one at the fair. This is the one that goes. I like the little one that goes around and around. If it just was like this, I would be fine. But this is the one that when it starts going, the centrifugal force or whatever, you get away from the thing, you know? Yeah. You flare out. And that's the part where I'm like...

Crying. Equilibrium. But so they're up there, and they're up there for about 10 or 15 minutes. And they were told... And this is going to be ironic, given that this video is being shot on a cell phone. they were told when they got down that they had to stop the ride because someone on the ground noticed that someone up in the sky had a phone out on the ride.

And that's a violation. So now we stopped the ride. No way. And it takes a long time to get it down apparently. It was over that. That's way up there. The guests were told that that is strictly against their safety policies. Last weekend a ride operator stopped one of our rides

when a guest violated the policy. Once the issue was resolved, the ride resumed. Dude, my kids would never respect me again if I got caught up there with, whoa! Did they get to stay on so they had to come all the way back down? Hey, guys, cell phones up. We're going to send you back up, though. That I don't know.

I would think you're just getting off the ride. From up there? The ride. Have you guys seen the story about the now ex-police officer in Houston, the female? Continue. You can look her up. Ashley Gonzalez. I forgot to put a picture in on this one.

But she's in a car getting ready to. This is like she's going out for a night out of the town, got her makeup all on or club dress on. And she just starts ranting about how much she hates black people. Oh. She doesn't call them that. But we have a different word? What is interesting is, and I remember the first time I ever heard about this

was when I looked into, looked into, like I'm a reporter, when I read a story about the cops. that the shield is based on. And after they got in trouble, they had to do what they're now having to do in Houston, which is every single lawyer of every person she ever arrested, especially if they're black, is like, yeah, we'd like to maybe take a look at that case again. Yeah. What's going on there?

So they're reviewing dozens of cases. I think if you want a hot daughter, name her Ashley Gonzalez. There's a lot of different people named that. It does kind of track that way, doesn't it? But social media post? Oh, social media rant. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

The Graham? It was, I don't know. Grammar talk. It's been... Just Google Ashley Gonzalez-Husston PD. Yeah, it's her. Let's see. Down in Guadalupe County,

the sheriff's office recovered a stolen cargo shipment, Dan. worth $250,000 of goods inside. Now, Guadalupe County, let me make sure I have this right. Well, that's not exactly as far as I would have thought. The two men were arrested with this truck, $250,000 of snow crab inside. They had boosted a quarter million dollar snow crab truck. How are you going to move it? From Florida to Mississippi.

Do you sit outside Papadose and offer that for half price? I mean, because... Just bring it in. You know what? A crazy one I remember, my buddy used to be... He was managing a Jimmy Johns,

and somebody broke in and stole their meat slicer. Like pre-dawn. You know, they had clearly scattered the thing out. And he's like, these things are... We're talking to pre-dawn raid? Several... Oh, yeah. Don't you feel like that's an anchor-e?

Anchor-a-d-in. several thousands of dollars right yeah but he's like what what if you're open up your own shop right so i don't know that you can sell him to popadose but maybe if you went down to the gulf and just said hey we i don't know you sell them or fishermen sell them yeah i would cut my finger off 72 year old woman in plano uh pass away after monday night she was hit by a car on Parkwood Parkway. She was hit by a car because she ran into traffic chasing her unrestrained dog. Kind of like what we were saying about, what we were talking about earlier, getting squatted.

At some point, we're kind of looking at the author of this action. Did the dog live? Yeah, it doesn't say. Okay. Actually, it does. It says the loose dog was secured, but it doesn't say lived. says. I probably live then.

Probably so. Those little dogs are nimble. Way more than a 72 year old. Yeah. You ever just let your grandma out and make her run across the eight-lane road? It's hilarious. I don't hate it. Is this a story that's a couple weeks old?

We're looking to do bits at the GSC. Grandma games. Grandma games. Bring your grandma. This is a couple weeks old, but it was circulating on social media again yesterday. CBS had a big story about Dallas ISD. And I think this is something that's actually about to be enacted in San Antonio in one of their bigger school districts. But what this is is the district-wide all-day cell phone ban.

from the first day of school to March 31st, 2026 of this year, obviously. The district reported an increase of more than 200,000 additional books checked out compared to the prior year. Like the total circulation numbers are insane. Increased 25%. The first week of 2024, there were about 500 books checked out. This year was about 1,800. This ninth grade or 7,000. Now that I'm busy with a bunch of work and college and books,

I don't find myself missing that phone that much, even at home. This is a plant. You think? What are you saying? They're trying to make the band look better. Oh, look, kids are reading again. I kind of believed you until they had that fake-ass quote in there. Yeah.

I heard-ass kid. Too busy. I don't, oh, I don't even miss my phone. Dork? I don't know about that, but. It does make sense, though. I saw someone say, hey, anybody who went to school from the time where COVID happened and they had to do it on a computer to when you were allowed to have a phone all the way all through the day, like five-year period, I feel for you. Because we know now this is terrible.

You shouldn't have a phone at school. And definitely before COVID, you know, the iPad ramped up big time after COVID. That's a big deal in like the education circles that I've been talking to people in is like get the iPad out. Go back to pen and paper. Okay, because they were pushing it super hard now. They gave my daughter a- Do you want to know the conspiracy theories? These are not really conspiracy theories.

This is just how fucking government bloat works, whatever. It's because they get into these contracts with these massive technology companies where they agree to pay them a top. ton of money that they got earmarked for this or that. Hey, we're going to make this super nice, and it's going to be the craziest coolest building with the craziest technology, and everyone's going to have two iPads. And now, like, they've committed to all this stuff. No, we don't think about it at all. And then they're like, well, the teachers need to make more.

Well, you know what they... I agree. Fire the iPad. They should contract with, like, puffs or Kleenex, because that's always on their list. Like the teachers send us a list at the beginning of the year of stuff to buy for the teacher. Like every kid has to buy one box of Kleenex so that they have all that Kleenex to go through the whole year. Yeah, Northeast ISD in San Antonio voted earlier this week that the full cell phone banning classrooms starts bell to bell when school starts next year. That's just going to be how it is now.

Well, it should be, but the problem is it is district by district. Yeah. I think there is a state law maybe that allows you to do it. Having, now having been a kid and having had kids that go through public school, like I think certainly the cell phone ban is a great bit. I think school uniforms should be mandatory. That just takes all the pressure off. Yeah, I agree.

As I become an old and realized that if I just buy you. five black t-shirts. I will just, you won't be surprised. Everybody's, everybody's cool. Yeah. I love it. Yeah, just because it's a class system too. You can't afford certain clothes, or maybe it's, you're like me,

and you wear, like, orange shoes, and you got, like, a blue hat, and everybody's like, ah, start laughing at you. Like, if I just had the uniform, then you don't have to worry about that. Sure. And I think, too, the side, It seems like kids in uniform schools find ways to... To personalize it. Yeah, your shoes or your socks or like some sort of whatever.

They have fun with it. We were supposed to wear collared shirts, but for my junior and senior years, I didn't because I just wore a coat. I thought I was skirt in the system. So you had a uniform? Mm-hmm. He went to a private school, man. Super easy. I had a pair of khakis.

I had a pair of blue pants. And I had a green shirt, blue shirt, white shirt, and a green jacket. The jacket. So you're in junior high wearing the jacket. You had to wear a jacket every day? I didn't want to wear a colored shirt. Okay, so you could shed that jacket. A.k.a.

Did you say you did one year in public school? Loest hanging fruit? Yeah, sixth grade. What does that mean? I didn't have the best time there. So wait a second. Your parents gave you the option. You could just do what you want.

Yeah, coming out of fifth grade, it was, they heard about this school, Garland Christian, that they would love to send me to, but all my friends were going to Jackson Middle School, which fed into North Garland. So where did you go to school before this fifth grade? Just like the elementary school in your... Okay, so that's public school.

Yeah, I could ride my bike there. Okay. Okay, so now you had the option. You can go to the Christian school or the public school. All your friends are just going to public school. Yeah. So I took the bus to Jackson. Learned a lot.

Learned that. I didn't want to be there. What do you mean? It was too much? I mean, do you remember, like, the first time you met me? He was timid. It wasn't as... Think of all the reasons you thought I was weird.

I was way worse in middle school. Maybe a little bit of speech. Yeah, but you had already gone to school with all those kids. They knew who you were. They knew that... No, no, no, no. Everybody's nervous when your elementary feeds to your junior high. You may go to the medium or the high-level elementary.

Because you're now three other elementaries are going into that school? Yeah. In the F-in-7th and eighth. graders? Yeah. Oh, no, no, no. I was weighing over my head. I had a mullet. Oh, God, dude. Oh, man. His little lid. He kind of had, he had a little stutter, too. Yeah, wasn't good, man. Really wasn't good. I needed protection. Orthopedic specialists. I needed kids that had to go to chapel. Look at him now, though. Gold medal. I got a gold medal. There's your news.

Right. Look at him now. I want to think about this a lot. Yeah, no. So you then were given the, like at the end of the year, you had been bullied and whatever enough. Please get me out of here. Please. And now they had to pay for school. Yeah. But they were on board with that? Yeah. Pretty much? Yeah, their kid was sad. Of course.

Okay. Then did your siblings go there? Don't you have a sister? How many sisters' brothers you have? One sister. That's it. Mm-hmm. And she go there, too, or she go to the public school? Because she's a man. No, she went to private, but then she went to public.

Okay. I always kind of got that vibe. More of a public school system. Yeah, didn't fit into the private school. And so how many kids were, like, in your class? 32. The whole... When you graduated?

Yeah. Wow. I think mine was like 900, 800, 800. Yeah, that's what I'm thinking. The regular thing is. Yeah. Where did you rank? Oh, academically?

Yeah. 27th. Damn. But you're like the best baseball player. He didn't come here to play school. Okay. Yeah. Let's just coast through this.

Let's get out of here. Would they have let you wear a poncho shirt? Oh. Hell yeah. To school. Yeah. I bet you there are schools that allow ponchos as uniform shirts because they're comfy. You can wear them in anything, any sort of weather.

You can wear them for dress events like Blake does, the long sleeve. You could wear them to read them to read them. Recess. You could wear them to recess. Because you could wear it outside. Doesn't it have like SPF? You're not going to get sunburn. Laced into there.

Go to poncho outdoors.com slash dumbzone. Enter your email for 10 bucks off your first order. Poncho Outdoors.com slash dumbzone. Get 10 bucks off. Free shipping. Who knows? Maybe your wife wants one for Mother's Day.

These are the best shirts that I own. You need a button up. You need a poncho. Be like David's Centendry from Fox 4 and go to Poncho. and go to poncho outdoors.com slash dumbzone. Do you think that what he's wearing is an actual poncho? No, I know it is because you can see the label. Oh, okay.

Just a very understated, small label, right? It's not a huge thing, but you can see that it's, you can give the knowing nod. Okay. Game Day Men's Health presents on this day in history. He's out there covering some trauma scene with blood everywhere, and he's like, My poncho will stay dry.

Our Game Day men's health location today is going to be Mansfield. We'll call them in a little bit, okay, Blake? Yeah. But first, I'll just tell you it's Thursday, April 30th. Last day of April. In like a lamb or something. It's going to be May. It's going to be May.

Are we doing, when do you want to do MBR? Monday, Ted. Oh, okay. Ted Emmerk. That sounds glorious. You got Ted Emmerk? Oh, yeah. On this day, in 1993, top-ranked women's tennis player Monica Sellis,

stabbed in the back. This is literally, like a knife. This is where that phrase comes from. During a match in Hamburg, Germany, by a man who said he was a fan of German player Steffie Groff, and she was ranked second in the world at the time. Yeah, you would have caught me on the right day. I would have stabbed Dylan Brooks for Luca.

I mean, there was a time. The man was convicted of causing grievous bodily harm given a suspended sentence. And it worked. Steffie Groff would then become the top-ranked women's player in the world. He's probably like, this is great. But it worked. You.

I kind of went through this and. You don't want to test your... But his goal was to make his favorite tennis player the number one. Like, it actually worked. Total success. Yeah. You don't... It's hard for the American mind with the justice system we're used to

to comprehend how things work in Europe. Because like I say, I'm anti-death penalty. And I think rubber meets the road I would be. But you can do a lot over there not getting very much trouble. Like, have you ever been seen what jail is like? Even people that are there for a lot of. long time. It's like an apartment. I don't think that

jail should be a place that you get raped, no matter what you do. What do you think of that? Is that real lib? No, I don't think it's real lib. I think rape you definitely want out of there. It becomes more like, oh, what is it about? Can you rehabilitate people? And if, you know, it's for profit, maybe you're not

as excited about that. But it is shocking when you see some guy that like, you set me in my living room without my phone for an hour? Like, that's enough. This day in 1997, the TV show Ellen on the show. She came out as a lesbian with guest Laura Dern. They kissed.

This was a huge deal. What year? 1997. Do you remember this at all, Jake? Little Jake? What was it? It was the Ellen coming out. Oh, yes, of course.

Like it was a huge, like, everybody knew she was gay, but then it was like, well, is she going to, like, publicly say it? Yeah. And not her, will her character on her show actually come out as gay? And she did. This show was a big one. They had a lot of guest stars. Dwight Yochum plays a grocery store employee.

Demi Moore is in it, as was Oprah Winfrey and K.D. Lang. Like, hey, seriously, I'm not. I'm gay. Look. Look who I've been booked. Ah, okay, yeah. Okay. You're gay. Yeah, I remember it being a big deal to get the magazine. There was a magazine where she was on the cover. Like people or something? Or Ms. I don't know. Probably not Ms. Part of more like Liz.

Liz. Hell yeah, bro. Dude, wavelengths. Speaking of the Oprah Winfrey show. Didn't we just speak of Oprah Winfrey? Yeah, she was on that episode. On this day in 2008, David Blaine, Jake, set a Guinness World Record. He held his breath for 17 minutes and four seconds.

Was he raping someone while he held the breath? Oh, he's on the list. The world famous magician was into tricking ladies into having sex with him. I thought it was a part of his act. The guy with a Vegas residency. Yeah, David Blaine's a rapist. And I'm going to just reiterate to you guys, and if you'd like to try it with me, you will quickly be convinced. it's not that hard.

To rape? You just have to practice. To be a magician? To do what? Yes, yes. And also yes, hold your breath. Oh, you meant the breath thing. 17 minutes seems that hard.

It's insane. But when we started talking about it the other day and you guys were like two and a half minutes, like I was... That's a long time. It is. I'm telling you that... David Blaine did it like underwater.

Will you do that on the dumb zone? two and a half minutes. I don't think I could, I mean, I could try. I can definitely hold my breath that long, but there could be some seepage, right? I just think even if we gave you weeks or months, you're not getting to three minutes. I'm saying you could do it in one month.

No. You can. No. You wouldn't know if you hadn't tried. I'm with Blake. I like his counterpoint of no. Just try it. Just try to add five or ten seconds every day for a month and see if you could do it.

Site of study, no. But then I don't like this. You're asking me to train in a way of holding my breath, which sucks. Just do that a lot for a month. Very good for you. And then what do you get? And then I have a neat party trick. It's not worth it.

Yeah, but then you're allowed to rape people like David Blaine. It was that he's holding up his contract. Yeah, look, it says right here. It says right here. Proceed. So this same day, 2008, that David Blaine is there holding his breath. Later that day, the Mavs fired Avery Johnson as head coach. And then despondent over the fact that he didn't think he could ever hold his breath for that long,

and he was a big Avery Johnson fan. Julio Franco announced his retirement from professional baseball. The oldest player to ever hit a home run in the major leagues. They claim at this time he was 49 years old in 2008. And he wasn't. Always a concern about how old Julio Franco really. was. That's the first time I ever learned.

That's probably like how Magic Johnson is how I learned that sex could make you sick. And Julio Franco is a probably time I, the first time I ever heard, like, not everywhere knows when everyone was born. Like, that's something you kind of take for granted. Yeah. But if you think about it. Two years after this, so inspired by those three events, somebody sat down at the typewriter and started writing.

And on this day in 2010, his final piece was released in theaters, The Human Centipede, a horror film that sees a trio of tourists kidnapped by a mad scientist who surgically attaches them to each other, mouth to anus, creating a gruesome human centipede. My daughter would go on to watch the Human Centipede, one, two, and three, and then join our show eventually to review those. I thought that was one of the better segments we've done. She was very good at watching and reviewing the human centipede. If we're going to talk about it, I would like her involved.

I would also possibly prefer we just don't. Just my one thing. Even thinking about it right now, like I was going to eat after the show. It's just like, who comes up with that? That person So you're saying it makes you too horny to eat You know, I get So it's April 30th

What happened this day in Dumb Zone history In 2021 we had Willie Collie Stein on Oh, he was really good, wasn't he? Very good Dan and Jake up on the ticket Big fan Oh, that's what he's, that was his sign off? It was something like that

I'd never listen to Dana Jake up on the ticket Nice. It was something cool. He was the most, like, always laid back. Yeah, man. Just, it was. You think he ever did pot? I think, yeah, I do think he did pot.

I think he's a good dude, too, but I definitely think he had some mental chemical imbalances. He was. Don't we all? Yeah, he played with Rick. He played for Rick. Oh, yeah. All right. What I remember from that is he grew up, he was a dominant football player, played baseball.

He was a multi-sport athlete. He played in Kansas because mine oh, so. saw him. Mino was in college when Willie Colley Stein was in Kansas and he was like, we would go see this kid who was like six, nine, six, ten. They would just throw the ball to every play. Initially, Collie Stein

exceptional defense on Tristan Thompson, but as you said, it's like he might have hurt himself, but Donchitz right here, double team, smart play and another nutmeg by Donchish. That's two. Got hitting the wiener. And then

right here, Willie Collie Stein played good defense. I thought he got away with a foul right there. Certainly the rest called it again. Willie Collie Stein, shaken up. He took a knee to the hyphen. That's really good. That is good. I think his name is also legally Willie Trill Collie Stein.

Yeah, that was the first name. He added Trill to his name. What I was going to say about him. Too true and real. Him being a multi-sport athlete, we had gotten into the conversation that Luca specialized in basketball. He thought maybe I would have been better at basketball had I just played that. Yeah, it kind of got sad.

He did. He was like, yeah, I had to be thinking about it. I guess maybe I should have just. Yeah. And then in 2020, we were doing the hang zone by this point where we would have somebody in for three segments. Today we had Gordon in. And I don't know why we settled on this, but we decided to play.

Dale Hanson's best audio. Well, yeah, I mean, obviously Gordon's a Dale guy, but it was because I was watching a lot of WFAA at the time, and it was very funny to me that Dale post Ellen and post part of mine and being cool with gays, he would still do like Dale humor every night, where he's like, yeah, I told my wife if she didn't have my eggs, ready. Like, it was all, she had a broken leg.

And if she didn't make it back over here. The way it should be. Yeah. He's a good dude, but you can joke. Yeah. And it would be... W.H.L. He would have jokes about, like, yeah, me and my wife were down at Marty Grohl.

For some reason, I kept getting beads. She was getting none of them. You would joke about her like that. It was so funny to me. Then we would bring it in with Gorge. And I did have beads that I wanted to bring in tonight, but I was a friend if I gave you bead, you'd take your shirt. Cynthia may be... Good thinking.

Well, there is some... Well, there is a precedent for that. The lovely Mrs. Hanson and I went to New Orleans several years ago. They started hollered, you know, to show me thing about the beads. And I came back with about nine beads, and she got none. I have no idea why that was. He's the man. He's a king.

He's the man. I think this is the best one, though. He walked in at 1021. Were you guys out celebrating Valentine's stuff in the lovely Mrs. Hans? Really? Seriously? She's actually in a very bad mood.

This is true. She was trying to get to the musical tonight. Okay. Because I bought her season tickets. That's what I did. Did you really? Did you notice the traffic out there today? I mean, she couldn't get to.

Stim is just shut down. It was stopped on 35. She turned around and went back home. I said, go, you'll be there in time to fix me dinner when I get it. It worked out to be a perfect balance of that. Hey, the legend of Luca. The legend of Luca. Tomorrow.

Oh, man. Tomorrow. That's good stuff. Real good stuff. Let's call a game day, and I'll tell you about the rest of today's birthdays, too. We're going to call the Mansfield location. Let's see, where is that exactly? I guess we can just ask them, right?

Game Day Men's Health. It is gameday.dumzone.com. There are studios sponsored. No doubt. And all the rage these days is peptides. Every one of their locations has like a really long. number. Thank you for calling Game Day Men's Health in Mansfield.

See what we got. If you're a new patient press 1 for existing patients press 2. Can we press buttons on this thing or no? Okay, I don't know. Which one will get us there faster? Apparently one. Game Day Men's Health. This is Alyssa. How can I help? Hey, Alyssa.

Hey. My name is Dan McDowell. I'm here with my friend Jake and Blake. And we're doing a a program, a podcast, I guess, YouTube show. We go live to tape every day. We broadcast live to tape from inside the Game Day Men's Health Studio in downtown Dallas at the Fox 4 building. Oh, wow.

Isn't that cool? Pretty official, isn't it? Yeah. And we're calling you. Say again? I said, yes, it is. So we're called the Dumb Zone. And we're calling you because you are our Game Day Men's Health location.

of the day. Wow. Congratulations. Say a few words about just what this means to you. Yeah. And you speak for the entire Mansfield location. Are you the Mansfield location? Yes, correct.

Where exactly are you if people, because we want people to go to you and then mention the dumb zone. And like we heard about you on the dumb zone type thing. So Mansfield is very big, big. Big City. Can you focus in and tell us where you're exactly? Yeah, we are on East Broad Street. Broad Street?

Broad Street? Yeah, East Broad Street. Across from? Mansfield High School. Mansfield High School. What's their mascot? See, I don't know that one. Do you, Blake?

Timmerview is the wolves. Summit is the Jaguars. Nobody knows. Alyssa, where are you from? They're from England. Okay, how long you've been here? Ten years now. Okay, interesting.

In England, you know, you're on Broad Street. In England, did they call ladies broads ever? Yes. They did, yeah. And it wasn't ever a good term. Oh, okay. They have another word they use for women over there, too, that seems to get thrown around a ton that we're kind of a little more no-go on over here.

No, they don't call women. women that. I thought they just used the C word flippantly as if it's just nothing, right? You ever watch the boys? Yeah, is exactly what I watch. You watch the boys? So they use the C word aloud on the boys,

doesn't he? Yeah. And it's like, you're right, con. Yeah. Can you believe he just said that? I can't believe he did that in front of you. I'm sorry, Alyssa. Alyssa.

She loves the boys. We're a fellow boys watchers. For all of us. What brought you over here? On this to this side of the pond. My husband. Okay. Is he American or English?

American. Texas? Mm-hmm. You did it right, Alyssa. That's what I've been told. Okay. So he's like, hey, let me sweep you away. We're leaving what city did you grow up in?

Essex. Essex. Oh, let's not act like England is. Let's go move to Mansfield. What? Okay, pal. I don't know what Essex is like. Is Essex suck?

I'm just saying it's a pretty gray place over there. Is it really? We're not leaving. Do you get more rainfall in Essex or in Monsfield? Definitely. Well, it depends on time of year, but I would definitely say in Essex. That's for sure. Okay.

When you go home, are they like, boy, you have a Texas accent. Yes. Really? That's crazy. But then people here, like Native Texans like Jake, they're like real mean to you and they're like, hey, Were you from? How are you talking for it? They are, and so I tell them I'm from West Texas, and I just let it grow.

All right. I think you're a delight, and I think people should go to... Go meet Alyssa. Yeah. Meet Alyssa. I think they should. They should call me. Okay, yeah, call.

Why not? 817406-7773. That's our Game Day Men's Health location of the day. It is Mansfield. Is Sandeep, the owner over there? Yes, sir. Okay, we're fans of Sandee. Ask about the BP 1.

Tell them, Alyssa, BP 157. What's BP 157? Oh, yeah. It's a peptide. It's a peptide. Yeah, it's great for any muscle issues, any injuries. It's definitely going to help. How about the love muscle?

Not the BPC. They got you covered there too. Thanks a lot, Alyssa. But we got stuff for that as well. Thanks, Alyssa. You're welcome. You guys, have a great day. Cheerio.

Bye. That was fantastic. She's awesome. That was great. We're calling her back every day. They give her the new customers. Wow, you see, Dan picked a location with the name Sandeep thinking he was going to get one thing pleasantly surprised elsewhere. Jackpots everywhere.

You're an uptick in remotes in Mansfield. I just decided, yeah, Dave's all mad. Like, why didn't she go to the grapevine one? your B-12. I don't know. I just thought I'd drive over to Mansfield. Kind of see how everybody's doing. Other birthdays today. Jake, this could be our birthday of the day, but I didn't want you to go too wild at the end of the show. Alex Bannister is 31. I still think we could probably book her if you wanted.

The long-lost Bachelor podcast with Jake Kemp and Alex Bannister. I would bump Dale tomorrow for Alex Bannister. I'm lying. I would never bump Dale. Come on. Tony Pollard is 29. that is not only a former cowboy who can leave and churn out thousand-yard seasons. He was like a in, he was a teammate with Rico Dowdle. They could have just kept one of those guys.

It's astounding, dude. They don't have to. Now. They just don't know how to evaluate talent, I believe. Let me go over here to my little sheet. I'm trying to find. That one was considered a bit of a reach. Like he did not, he was not considered.

much of a prospect. Because he was a receiver. Pollard? Yeah. Yeah. Kick or Turner. Yeah. So that's what's crazy about it, Dan, is they did see it.

And they're like, this guy's good. We should take him in the fourth round. We should make him a running back. We should find packages for him. But because they were so bent over by the Zeke deal, everything got thrown off. They could have easily had a future with Tony Pollard, or he's not making crazy money, fan favorite.

But no. Brandon Bass is 41. How many post-game shows? What do you mean? Just the spare Mavericks you had to get excited about because we had nothing else. Brandon Bass was a fine player, Blake. What's what I'm saying? Put some respect on his name.

Mid-range J looks great. Was he ever the Twyman Stokes teammate of the year? Probably not. Doubtful. Doubtful. Isaiah Thomas is. I met the criteria. I was about to say.

65. Phil Garner is 77. Very light day for a war games winner. Phil Garner 29.7. Michael Waltrip is 63. Oh, dude. I forgot to do this. I think the tech quarterback can bet on him.

I forgot. Speaking of guys, the tech quarterback could have bet on but can't anymore. Um, it appears that Greg Biffle was robbed of hundreds of thousands of dollars. And he was robbed by, like, a guy he used to, like, fly planes with. That's how it is, right? Side job. Well, we're keeping an eye on Jake. Those closest to you are the ones that'll pilfer from you, right?

Yeah, I mean, I guess. Look how many, like, business stories have you heard? Or, yeah, my initial partner. I love doing this or that. It's crazy. That's why I'm trying to steal from you before you steal from me. I'm going to do it someday, too, once we get something to steal. Is it better to rob a dead person, though?

Yeah, then you're just robbing their family, like their wife and kids. That's okay, right? The whole family died, didn't they? Yes. Yeah, I think so. Yeah, they died. Oh, how do he die? It's a plane crash.

Oh. Like a private plane. Like every remaining air died, so. It feels like karma is going to come. Come get you. But is it or he just... He stole after he died. Yeah.

Oh, okay. But like right away. Like... Oh, I still know. Lomba. I still know his gate code. Sure. Yeah.

They say it's a friend of the family. You know what I'd like to see? Here's a movie thing. Movie trope in the middle of birthdays. Sure. I'd like to see you guys crack my password. Like, let's say it's just the password. that opens your computer.

You know how, like, they can do it within, like, three or four? I don't know. It's a daughter's birthday. And then they get, ah, yeah. Or they kind of look around the room. Oh, looking here on the bottom of this. Here it is. Yeah, that's great.

Found it on a note underneath. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, he hit it here for me. I'm just saying I think I would never be able to crack a password. No, you're right. And in fact, if they wanted to modernize it, they would do whatever. I now know happened to me on Twitter, which is you just get a fishing email that looks really,

really real. Because I got, now that I know, you clicked yes on something? Yeah. I got an email that said, you're in violation of DMCA copyright, which I have been before. Oh, so you clicked on it. Yeah. And I looked in my spam yesterday, and I had two dozen of these emails. But this one got through, and it said these two pictures are copyright violations. So instead of- So you don't need to crack. That's what they would do in movies now. So this is the thing. When I get a phishing scam.

Supposedly an email from the bank that says your account, whatever, I'll just open up the bank website. Which is what I always do. So you didn't open up Twitter to see. You just said, oh, my gosh. Yeah, I was like, oh, shit. I said your accounts, you know, whatever. It's my fault.

It's very dumb. But my point is that's what they should put in movies. Just send somebody an email from their bank. And you'll have their, no guessing. Kirsten Dunst is 44. Phil Garner died earlier this month. Well, his war still sucked. That's a low number for that many seasons.

As a brewhead, sorry Matt and Elizabeth. This is for... For the crew. Yeah, for the crew. I wonder how many people are double brewheads, though. Got to be a handful. Got to be. Because I think baseball leans, like if you were to say sports fans that would listen to Matt Brunig,

you know, heavily numbers influence autists are... Baseball? Yeah. Okay, so anyway, as a brewhead, I'm sorry that I didn't know this about Phil Garner. Maybe I was just trying to avoid the news. Kyle Harrison deal on the other day. Wasn't he a great brewer? Yes.

Kyle Harrison pitches really well when you don't drill him in the knee with a fastball from first base. So I got a Mark Phil Gooner. Wow. All right. Elsewhere, Gal Godot is 41. What's she known for? Getting all the celebrities to talk about how horrible COVID was from their million-dollar mansions. Talk?

I don't remember them talking at all. I kind of, what did they do? Imagine there's no heaven. Oh, my God, bro. below us. Looks like it was 68% of the precincts in Dade County reporting. This one's going 5842 Trump. This is on the Mount Rushmore. It's like if we go up to Fort Lauderdale, that's trending red as well.

Back over to you, Anderson. No, you know what else she's known for is she's one of the hottest women to ever live? Hot Wonder Woman, right? Yeah. Yeah. And part of the reason she was so ready for her. All the ugly Wonder Woman that they usually roll out. Well, this Wonder Woman happens to live in a place where they have compulsory military service as part of your birthright citizenship.

So Gal Godot was in the IDF. What's the IDF? The Israeli defense. Does that make her even hotter? Yes, dude. She would do like photos shoots where she would be all warred out looking. Don't strip my Gaza. You know what I'm saying?

I shouldn't laugh at that That wasn't that good Anna DeArmus is 38 Holy cow What's her bit Knives out Being the hottest woman on this planet Oh yeah she's great

David Miskavage is 66 She could use a cheeseburger She could What were the planes called DC-9s The head of the church of Scientology Johnny Galecky is Evil Lord Zinu.

The kid from Roseanne. Then he was on the Big Bang Theory. Theory. Whatever. Rappers of the day, ready for rapper birthdays? Again, this is my fault. Lloyd Banks is 44. Listen.

We respect. Turbo B is 59. Member of G unit. Sorry. Turbo B. Nothing. That end up person. Travis Scott 35. You got people killed.

It's a big deal. but kimp's been you know and lil t j is 25 nothing okay little t j stopped it lord that's just when you get a small surgery don't laugh at any of these i'm trying to ache it i like the attempts i like the stars they may not be quality uh our youtube birthday of the day is roberto burgos don't even tell me wait he's nine He's now 21. Okay. But he's actually from a family.

Yes. Go ahead and look up the B-E family. The B-Family. B-E. 10.4 million subs. I think their last one, last video, has about a million views. It was playing hide-and-seek in a mansion. Okay.

The B-family is for everyone. Our content is mainly for families, and our goal is to inspire and have more fun together. I just, I can't tell you how much I hope for all of these families. the parents, their downfall. We are a family of four starring Mama Bee, Papa Bee, Mr. B, and Gabriella B. Everyone who does this should be put in a prison. Not the German kind.

Sounds like a guy jealous about all those imps. Not the German kind. It's just, you know, like, don't you feel... They're all the same thumbnails. I feel weird when I have to make my kids pose for a photo. They hate it. And it feels odd to, you know, use them as props for our own.

I remember it as a kid and then being like, he's, take a picture, take a picture. But then imagine doing that and making it your whole life. Imagine. No, shut up. But that awkward feeling you have of like, man, am I pimping out my kid?

Like, did they like this or is this just for me? That like weird tingle you have? Imagine just making that your whole life. 10.4 million subs. I don't give a damn. Hello, Mama Bee. Yeah? I'll fight Daddy B at Fight Night if you wants.

And our Dumb's on birthday of the day is for Blake. Of course they're Canadian. That's just. Alexandra Holden is 49. Look her up. Alexandra Holden. This is CEO of Arrowhead or something? I wish.

You recognize her? I do. I do. What do you write? recognize her from? Because it's for Blake for very special reason. I just recognize her face now that you're

saying it though. Obviously I know what this will be. If he doesn't know, I'll just say. She's friends? She dated Ross. Oh. Oh, yeah, yeah. Okay, Bruce Willis was her dad. She was like 19. She was one of Ross's

students. And they They started dating. Then Bruce Willis comes in and is like, hey, why are you 35 and dating my 19-year-old? And then he ends up being, he ends up dating Jennifer and Rachel in the show. And then they get to double date and go to a vacation house together. That's why we do this, folks. That's incredible. That's the beehive right there.

Says here that this is a fun note because obviously Matthew Perry's involved. Bruce Willis was in the whole nine yards with Matthew. Perry, Bruce Willis agreed to donate his appearance fee for friends to charity after losing a bet on the set of the whole nine yards with Matthew Perry. That's fun. It is fun. Whole nine yards, very good. It is.

Yeah. Yeah. You're going to get to see Jennifer Pete's Pee-P's. Jennifer Pete. No, Jennifer, Amanda Pete. Amanda Pete, yeah. Yeah. Oh, okay.

Good scene. Yeah. I think I'm down on Amanda Pete these days. Yeah, I mean, she's... What is she done? Not much to keep herself looking nice. I'm sorry, that's horrible. That is horrible, man.

It's not the Jake I know. It's horrible because I was never really that attracted to her. But she is... I like her vibes, though. She is kind of knockoff Lake Bell. She's great in saving Silverman. Yeah. Let's see here.

Oh, looks like she's in friends and neighbors. Oh, yeah, that's maybe why I'm really down on her. I don't like that character. It's a terrible character. Bitch. How about Alyssa watching the boys? How about the world, my friends? She knows you're a right, cunt.

Born on the Stay Now Dead. I'm going to get kicked off of YouTube. No, we're not. Not if you say it with the accent. and he mentioned the boys before it. Born and a stay now dead, Al Lewis. And the chicken!

It's Grandpa Munster. Bert Young. That's Pauley in the Rocky movies. He had a robot. No. Yep. Yeah. And Bobby V.

He was the singer who loved them young girls. In fact, one of the favorites that we like listening to is come back when you grow up. Ah, not a lot of left to the imagination there. Come back. Yeah, you go over to the... Like, so... Because now you're only... Is it a bad idea to do like a say-anything type thing

where you're holding a boombox in front of the Grapevine Middle School playing that song? Is that a bad bit? Yeah, I think it would be... Oh, this is funny. Would that be a good YouTube? This is a conversation. I think it'd be a bad bit because I think you'd get in trouble.

Like I think Okay, so You guys told me if this was weird or not. It's Bobby V's birthday. So. We're all celebrating the greatness of Bobby V. Business Wednesday. Big shout out, Sean Kernan and 360 wealth management.

But that means that the schedule is, we got a lot going on, but I can maybe get a workout out in the middle of the day. And I wanted, I've been trying to run sprints again. And so I go to the track. But it's like 12.30. The track is out of middle school. There's like 12 or 13 kids out deeing around on the football field at the track. And there is an adult there with like a lanyard on who I guess is in charge of them.

But I kind of just went out there and just did my thing. And I'll tell my wife about it later. And she was like, no. Uh-uh. You can't just go to a school. She's like, if nothing else, they're going to call somebody and be like, during the day. During the day you're on the school property. just hanging out. I never thought twice about it. I think she's probably right on that.

The teacher kind of seemed like they were getting the kids moving anyways, but it was, it occurred to me like, yeah, I'm kind of just on campus right now. I heard the bell, like it plays at the football field. And you've got your shirt off. I definitely had the vest on. I had a big rubber tube that I like do lunges with. So I told you guys I went to that community theater a couple weeks ago. I saw Tuck Everlasting. Have y'all seen this? No. The premise is you drink from this well, you remain the same age you are at the time you drink. This family, this boy who's old, meets this girl, she's 14.

The girl finds out about it and wants to drink from the spring so she can be 14 forever. And the boy says, why don't you wait a couple years? Does a little eyebrow raise? Everyone in the crowd loves it. Like, there are kids here. That's a high schooler. We're just joking about once you wait so I can bone you. Yeah.

I don't know, man. Grass on the field takes many forms, boy. No, just please wait. I guess give them credit for that. Yeah. Come on. What do you want? Hey, hurry up, drink it.

You're perfect now. Dead on this day still dead. You got your Adolf Hitler, along with his newest bride, his new bride, Ava Braun. They got married yesterday. So what a, you always talk about. failed marriages. Oh, man. Didn't even get the honeymoon phase. Or, yeah, three months, that's what Jessica Simpsons lasted.

Right? You're always looking at the one day. One day. And I would have thought, you know, they had kind of really, they'd gone through the counseling, had the finance history. Maybe they hadn't talked about kids yet because he was 56, she was 33. That could have been it. And sometimes you don't discuss those things beforehand, or it's the old days because This says what year we were looking?

I'm going to guess 45. 1945. So perhaps they had not consummated their relationship. They get married. They all of a sudden find out we're not sexually compatible. And they end up getting, they split up after that. Amicably. Yeah.

Look. He couldn't get hard with all that meth, right? He had a deformed. There is definitely something to that. I've never done meth, but I've had Adderall Weiner before. Really? Yeah. Game day.

dot dumbzone.com if you have Adderall Weiner. Well, you don't need the Adderall if you're feeling good. Also died on this day still dead. Peter Mayhew, Chewbacca. Chibacher. I think he lived in Texas for quite some time. Maybe down there where Dan Campbell lived. What's that?

Granberry? Yeah. Something? Yeah, I think you're right about all of that. I think that's actually where he died. Died on this day. George Spurdy. The inventor of Preparation H.

Thanks? I did not pause of what hemorrhoids are. I guess so. I guess I haven't had it. Man, I have. But I think, isn't there one called hemorrid, which I think is a great... That is great.

Great name for a medicine. Yeah, I've had it a lot. I used to have blood problems. That's weird. And that's what happened. Honestly. Yeah, we took care of that. The Badee.

Oh, yeah? Yeah. No way. 100%. Yeah. It's just leaving. You guys all have poop caked into your butts right now. The Baday can't be a cure all for everything anus-related.

Yeah, it is. Think about it. Most things can be solved by just cleaning it. Just clean it. No, you want to get little clusters. Man, I was looking for like a tie-in, but there's nothing. This segment of the Dumb Zone brought to you by Frankl and Frankel. So we'll just play that. Even if you die in a car accident, we could help your living

family get the bag. Frankl and Frankel. 2-14-817, then all threes. You know the bit, right? They're personal injury attorneys. And we need you to mention the dumb zone. If you do give them a call, and when you give them a call, you'll talk to a partner, a real live lawyer, one of the partners in the firm. Many of the people in the firm have worked for the insurance companies. So they know those tricks to try to keep you from getting the payout that you deserve. So personal injury lawyers, Frankel and Frankel. This is closing remarks time. Is there anything in the chat worth referring to?

I know Blake was all gung-ho like a couple weeks ago. Like, yeah, we'll check the chat at the end. It's going to be great. And since then, he's like, the chat sucks, man. Well, they got nothing. They're all doing their own show. That's what everyone's streamers check the chat. You got to be keeping with the chat.

I don't know. We're streamers, bro. Yeah, but that's because those people make their money doing that, right? Like, oh, super chat, super chat, super chat. But that's not really our game. I got a couple of pieces of email feedback. Sean, and this might be 690 scene. I don't know.

On pay bridges, not walls. Of course, you know Sean from... Sean Kernan and 360 wealth management. I'm Business Wednesday. He says feels like most of your paid subscribers would not care. So Jake, do you want to restate what your position was? Yeah, so right now we're live on YouTube on Mondays and on Thursdays. And we're live behind a paywall on YouTube on Tuesdays and Fridays for paywall,

Patreon or subscribers. A handful of people, a few hundred will watch on Tuesdays and Fridays live. Not very many people. But to me, it would be easier for us to, when I say sell this thing, I don't mean like spots, just sell it to people. If we were like, hey, every single day at 1130, fire up this app, you'll hear our show. And that would also apply to YouTube. Now, the second the show ends, 2 o'clock, 220, if you're not a subscriber, you won't ever get

that episode. So unless you're like going to set up some sort of a code scraping thing where you rip the audio every day and like which you're not going to do then bravo if you do that yeah then and so on that front it doesn't affect anybody other than the people who do listen live and i want to be careful about that but it would be way easier if we could get this on an audio only app our audience that the ticket was already used to that um and just like hey fire up the iHeart app fire up the whatever app and of course related to this is blake met a guy the other night who still was a huge ticket listener and had no idea where we went yeah so

So we were playing... Trying to simplify the pitch. Yeah, we were playing 42 at a brewery in North Richland Hills. Shout out, false idol. Yeah, yeah, good listeners, the Brewmaster over there. That's why we played there. But Saw Us playing Domino's was interested in that. And then started asking questions, and he found out I used to work at the ticket.

He was a big ticket guy. Listened since 1994. Always loved to Jake, because he was from Richelaine. Jake went to Richland. Didn't you guys used to do your show together? Yeah. Yeah, I thought you guys were awesome. You still listened. I loved you more than the Musers.

Whatever happened to you guys? Many such cases. And there are many ways to try to bit by bit solve this problem. But I think a big one is accessibility. But I also know that, like, at the end of the day, Patreon is what got this thing alive. And I don't want to lose it. We're getting results for sponsors. But more than anything, I just want more people to listen to the show.

I swear to God, I mean it when I say that if I made the exact same money, the rest of the time we do this and five, ten times more people listened at some point, I would be thrilled. Now, I know more people listening would probably translate into more revenue, but I genuinely think we got a lot of cool stuff going on, especially relative to the other options, and I'd like the live component of it as much as we can. It would have been easy for me to tell that guy. Fire up this app at 1130, every day.

And obviously, we don't do a show Wednesdays, but we can easily put together stuff to run during Wednesday's show. Like, this is the best of day. Subscribe here. That's my thought. So I think one of the concerns that I got, this is one of them. It'd be cool if you could continue to keep two of the four episodes ad-free. If live episodes for non-paid people means you're going to be mixing in ad reads Tuesday and Friday,

that would be a bummer because I like the flow of those episodes without ads. Yeah, and also you're paying for those to not have ads. So I think that's a... So what you're doing? you're saying is those will not have ads. Correct. Ever. No, I mean, we've done stuff before we're like, we're like, hey, we unlocked this today because of such and such. We don't really do that anymore. I mean, those shows will not have ads. We might mention game day because we're in the studio, but no,

it will be the same Tuesday, Friday setup. And if those shows are different, which they probably are, they will continue to be different. Okay, that was not 690 scene. That was a different guy who just said, make all the episodes live, whatever. Sean feels that same way. Most of your paid subscribers wouldn't care or be happy for your wider reach if the live show was free two more days. Worst case, let's see, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Oh, he says worst cases, some would drop their sub. You, of course, are doing the math to figure out what the extra reach is worth monetarily

and otherwise. If you try it and then change your mind, you can always change it back because, Kinnison, because you own it. That's true, but it's tough to get people to come back once they've severed. Yeah, yeah, I wouldn't. And it's the fully thing of, you know, it's like with your friends. You could probably, like, I don't want to say get away with the most, but if you called your best friend and you're like, I can't hang out tonight,

they're probably not going to care because they're super cool with you. But you don't want to do that all the time. You want to make sure. Now, I also saw some people that were worried about, like, the chat. because they're like, you know, I mean, it's going to be a lot of people in here. It's going to be more. It's going to affect. I honestly don't know that this will affect our YouTube numbers that much.

I really want a live audio stream. And I think that that might actually help us. I think, you know, a lot of people don't want to listen to a podcast on YouTube. Right now, if you want to watch the show live or hear the show live, you have to have a video component to it. So you've got to have YouTube premium or you got to put it on a background. Why not just a clean audio feed? Here's the show. Live radio. P.S., this is from Seen.

You guys are always wanting to cut out the middleman, but I noticed that term was never changed to the middle person or middle woman. Men taking the L once again as the only ones cut out. Now, I'll snap out a middle they the second I see him if they show their face. There we go. So nothing from the, you don't like the chat? Nothing today? Uh, oh, this one guy says he also has hemorrhoids too.

Adios, lofo. We gotta go before this becomes a zoo. See you guys for drinks later. Thank you for watching my video. Subscribe and type for my name if you want to watch more of my video. Imagine there is no heaven. It's easy if you try. No hell below us.

Above us only sky. Imagine all of our... Imagine all the people living for today. Imagine there is no countries yet. It isn't hard to do. Nothing they kill or die for. And no religion too. Imagine all.

I hope someday will join us. us and the world has one imagine no possessions i wonder if you can no need for greed and hunger brotherhood