The Dumb Zone FREE - DZ 8-25-26 | Klayton Adams's path and the Fantasy Machine from Cane Rosso

Episode Date: August 25, 2026

Get every episode of The Dumb Zone by subscribing to the show at DumbZone.com or Patreon.com/TheDumbZoneWe're live from Cane Rosso at The Star! Brandon Aubrey thought it was cute Dan and Jake took a picture in front of a Cowboys sign, Jake loves Klayton Adams because of his role and path to the NFL, and what would it be like to be Romo's roommate in rehab? (00:00) - Open: Live from Cane Rosso at The Star (16:56) - Today in Twitter: Dan fights with Claude (36:03) - Sports: Jake’s obsession with Klayton Adams (56:18) - Sesh: Romo in rehab (01:05:10) - Machine: Action is the Juice (01:27:21) - Jimmy Haslam comments on Deshaun Watson (01:36:45) - News: 14 days for shooting a bald eagle (01:54:25) - VM Birthdays/Today in History ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Hello, I'm professional broadcaster Julie Dobbs, letting you know that you're about to hear one of our free podcasts. But if you'd like to subscribe at dumzone.com, you'll get four shows per week, plus the weekend wrap up in any bonus episodes like our business Wednesday interviews. So if you forgot how to use the 15 second rewind, that's dumbzone.com to subscribe. Now on to today's program. Don't help me. You are listening to subscriber-only content. You get the feeling of something going on we don't know about. And welcome to Kanye Roso.

You are looking live via the ballast drone flying high above at the Frisco location, right across the street from the Star, where the Cowboys will be practicing this evening. Open practice. Open to the public. So community-minded. It's Dallas Cowboys. That's right. That's why the headquarter right here, downtown Dallas. They, and they built all this on their own.

They're like, we'll put the investment into your city. We'll foot the bill. I'm Dan McDowell. I'm Jake Kim. I'm Blake Jones. Foodie K is here because we're at Coni Roso. And because it's a show. T-C-C-K.

and many listeners have already shown up. And if you are a listener of our program, we are paying for half of your lunch. That's right. Half of your bill. Half of your bill. So yeah, you might also order. Oh, that's the only reason you do it.

You get one worth it right there. You might also order a pizza to go, and you might end up having some dinner. That is a thing that people will do. First down. Yes, sir. Con A Roso. That's right.

First down opportunity here. I will also be taking you up on your order of half off and be getting myself a pizza to go home. You don't have to pay for your food at work. Yeah, you have to pay for all of it. This is not the cloud. You shouldn't have to pay for food at your job. You should pay for it, and then you should get a receipt. No.

And then tape the receipt to a piece of paper and then turn it in. And it may or may not be. rejected. You'll just never know. It better be itemized. You'll never know. Did that get approved or not? Let's go look at my paycheck and then try to do the math to see, was there an extra? Listen, I'm going to have to hit you with the Pond Stars meme. I know you asked for health care. The best I can do is free pizza.

We've got you covered on that. Which is basically health care, right? You're going to be energized. Tomatoes. Cheese has protein. Yeah. Yeah. tomato, your vegetable.

It sucks because when I was a kid, I would try that play with my parents. And they were like, that's bullshit. You need to eat vegetables and whatever. You need to have this balanced diet. But when my kid does it, I'm like, that's absolutely true. Yes, you can just eat pizza from basically every meal at 40. Look at me. Grape jelly is like a fruit, right?

Sure. Yeah. You think anybody ever just pops out and runs routes on that field? Dude, we've seen it. I was thinking that with you earlier. like, would you do it if I had just said, hey? Yeah, probably. Be helpful if you had a ball.

Oh. Just running on air looks a little, but it's funny. There's just a football field. We saw the kid out there by himself. Throwing the ball with no dad. Well, yeah, and he had gloves. Not at a restaurant. What?

Only at a restaurant. That's early. And don't say what. That was so loud. Oh, I'm sorry to offend your sensibility. This is Jake. I think it's disgusting. It's just a sign you were disinterested in anything we had to say.

Yep, it's a move on. Okay. Well, that's, can't argue with that. So today, what? He's going to love that water. What are we pointing on? Oh, yeah, thanks. This is the guy that needs water.

What do you mean? Don't I look hydrated? You caused a scene here last. It was at this very place. Thank you. Yeah. It was at this Coné Rosa? Yes.

No way. This is the best Connerosa there is. You can say thank you. Thank you. You're like my kid. Here, I would like to give you a paper napkin to put under your... All right. Oh, Blake just bit my wiener.

No, that's not mine. I want to know about... Because we were talking to intern Henry after the show yesterday, and he's doing some extra social media stuff, and you guys are like, oh, it's great. He had promised us. We're going to have, like, this wave of... 24-year-olds that are just joining our show every day, right?

He did. Did he not say, look, what I can do on TikTok, you guys aren't going to believe. And then yesterday, he's like, I don't know, not getting much traction over there. He's kind of phasing out. I'm going to kick. No, I want to know, did Blake's movie review break containment? Because Blake had a great movie review yesterday. It wasn't great.

And I just want to see, did that get any reaction? Did the mic? I've not looked at the isagrom today. I've not yet made it a part of my... Because what is break containment? You invented this, right? Yeah, you see this sometimes. Probably the original thing of this is like when morning news anchors have to give sports names

or talk about sports. It's just a story they shouldn't really be covering. It shouldn't, it's not their purview. On social media, this happens all the time, and we have a very specific brand, I guess, of humor and topic matter. So when that gets put on the internet, anyone can see it and oftentimes does. And if we're making fun of a country like Belgium, the old days they'd never know. Now it breaks contain.

They're like, mu-ho, in the language that I speak, that is wrong. And now it's something that happens with frequency. Unfortunately. That is a Belgian accent, by the way, for those who didn't know. I don't know. Yeah. They always say, huh-huh. They speak France?

Yeah. All right. So what happened with Blake? And a quick, you want to give the tomato score one sentence? No, I don't. Okay. Why? It's Christopher Nolan movie, and it's awesome, and you should respect it.

Why are you? Oh, you, why would you back away? What do you? No, no. You suck. It's already out there. God. Remember when he liked Blake?

I don't know if you'd be putting on this headset again. All right. How did it go? It hasn't gone because it's going out today. Okay, good. All right. Could have nipped that in the butt early, but I do appreciate letting us set it up. It'll definitely get it.

some response. Yeah, what is wrong with you? Me? Yeah. What do you mean? If you didn't like it, you come out and you say, I didn't like this. I've been educated by the masses that I didn't get it, and I should have walked out of there with my head held high.

I watched such a masterpiece in three hours on IMAX. I didn't understand the score, the sound effects, the cinematography. I didn't understand the plot or how he becomes the... I didn't understand any of it. Otherwise, I would have loved it. Right. It has to be your problem. It's just too dumb.

It's me. It's your fault. I'm an idiot. Yep. I'm not cultured enough. And you were saying that there weren't enough fireworks in it, enough celebrity cameos. There was no car chases? No, there just wasn't enough. They didn't bring back Shooter McGavin. There wasn't enough Kevin James in it for me.

Man, what if Kevin James was in that? Ty Walker made it an extremely funny Photoshop of Kevin James as Odysseus. Do you think we could get a Kevin James rom-com with, Sidney Sweeney? I think that... How has that not been made already? I think that generally AI is probably going to lead to like a reduction in the human experience, but I do think the ability to think that thought and then have a feature

length film on your hard drive or whatever. Two minutes later would be interesting. That will happen, I think. Well, if I could have AI do stuff with Sidney Sweeney for me, it ain't going to be that. Well, you can. What? I can. Of course.

Eventually. Do you think that the deep fake AI porn thing went away? whenever, no, it's just now people use it for other stuff so they don't talk about the porn version anymore. Bobby Altof, it was pretty basic back then. Boy, you called that pretty quick. I was. I can't remember anything.

I was researching. This obscure influencer who had a six-month run. Boy, you're fat. That's because Blake told me I got to watch the Cuban Bobby Altaf video. He's like, it's hilarious. I got fooled. Okay, so you're not. You admit it wasn't hilarious?

Or is this like the way you're admitting Christopher Nolan is great? You just want to shut me up. Because I know your bits. Yeah. I'm on to you. I did think the first couple were funny, but looking back, maybe, yeah. Blake, did you want to have a quick update on your crime radar app experience? Are you trolling now?

Are you following the police? I thought you were going to ask about soccer practice because I've got thoughts on that, too. Oh, it was canceled. It was canceled. They said we could practice after 730 people. Yeah, but he had soccer practice. Oh, you did it. Okay, I thought you're going to ask.

They don't cancel things in Wiley. Right. You said that as much yesterday. And you went through with it. Yeah, and I don't know anything about soccer. It's not soccer at that age, but it's football. You're right. It's a pitch.

And the guy very disinterested, very low energy, and he was kind of letting the kids dictate the practice. This is the coach? Yeah. Okay. How was he installed? The one guy who said, The same way I was a coach,

six-y-use soccer team. They are begging for coaches. Sometimes that would be a Blake thing, so I... But you got football. I'm so out of my element with soccer. I have no idea about it. I was too, but it's a good... You're not.

I'm a good organizer or babysitter. You're not because... That's what they mean. That's what I did. And then we got our ass kicked in most games, and you kind of realize I need to let a... Yeah. And then one of the soccer-knowing parents,

like generally there's going to be a Hispanic guy I just joined you as your assistant coach. I lost mine this year, very controversial. Yeah. Because he was, it's great if you can get a league. Not all the parents loved the fire of the Latino, former Chilean soccer player.

I did, but he was on their ass. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I wouldn't even know. This guy wasn't last night. I didn't want to help because I didn't, because I don't know anything. But then I just see the kids are running this guy.

They're not paying attention. and I had to step in. Of course you did. At least because Brooks is on the team and his cousin is on the team. I was like, well, I'm going to at least take these two and we're going to do the drill right. That's right. And we did. That's right.

My two kids had a great practice. We were focused and we got a lot of work done. The other kids can't say as much. Now there's something that I heard Jake talking about on his satellite podcast of being a parent and then sticking around for practice. is because if you're, it is kind of a, it's, I don't know if it's emasculating, but it takes away some, you know, now you're describing your coach sucks, but also I've definitely been the coach of a team and you're telling them something, and then one of the parents kind of pulls their kid over and it's like,

all right, actually you throw the ball like the, like, the whole thing is, is that. No, but like, hit to his point. No, no, no, I just at least wanted my son to listen to direction and get the drill done. Here's the problem, though. The whole thing is so poisoned. And maybe this guy just sucks. But maybe he's also timid because all the parents are there. Used to, the parents would just leave.

And obviously there's downsides to that as well. That's why there's a lot of people registered on that crime radar after 20 years later. Right. But at the time, you know, you'd leave and your coach, if he needed to tear into you, he would. And it wasn't really a problem. I don't know. I never was at any practice where a parent was present. when I was a kid.

No, we had, you know, there might have been. Playing whatever sport. In hindsight, like the alcoholic dads were there. Imagine your parents just sitting in, well, not in Ohio at least. There's no parents sitting in lawn chairs while you're at football practice. My dad was. Just sitting there watching football practice? I mean, he had to drive me.

You just sit and watch. Yeah. No, but I may I should clarify, I don't think this guy sucks. He's coaching five-year-olds. Yeah. And you just have no rain. So I at least wanted to contribute my son and my nephew. you will focus and pay attention.

And so I had to wrangle them in. Nora's best season of soccer was the year I only coached her. For real. She was dialed outside of that. But I was listening to Caleb and Josh Downs talk about their summer football camp and they're doing whatever they're at home in the summer. It's like 8-year-olds, 9-year-olds, 10-year-olds, 11-year-olds.

It's the exact same. And these guys are like idolized athletes. They're like, look, I'm telling them run left and he runs straight. Yeah, we did this all day. Kids are idiots. And it has nothing to do with, you know, you, soccer. You get him to try to run straight.

Yeah, and so I just helped. And play FIFA. Where I could. Because he was not going to, not yell, but he was not going to raise his voice at kids. I understand that. I'll do it to mine. I'll at least help in that way. But yeah, the crime radar thing, I saw a police car in front of a house in my neighborhood,

and I knew the first place to check. Let's investigate. Let's see if there's been a call. And crime radar says, yes, CPS has been called at this house. Wow. CPS, they'll tell you. Yeah. There's a lot of old people in my neighborhood, and I told the guys, this could be like a real estate opportunity.

So if I see... Yeah, you see early. If I see early, there's like Ax. You're like Axe Capital, man. That house might be available. There's a welfare check at this house. Someone with money. Later today, let's see.

One hour from now. We will talk fantasy football with Mike Machine Marshall because everybody is getting their fantasy prep ready. So we'll try to help you with that a little bit. We also, I think, have some Clayton Adams audio. We are across from the star. What time did things kick today? This evening sometime, but we were out there.

So the Cowboys, TC alertly noted this, The Cowboys have a big, what, just Cowboys sign outside the front of the star, but they took the Y away so you can stand there and you can be the Y? Yeah, that's... Take pictures of it. That is, there's nothing that more clearly exhibits the influence of Charlotte Jones than that because that's a staple of any kitschy downtown in Texas. They'll have like a butterfly painting and then you go put your arms up on it and spread out.

Yeah, yeah. Perhaps an angel. So that's, that's tailor-made from... From the office of Charlotte. So we did that. We took pictures doing that. I thought you killed it. And look who was driving by and called me while we were doing it.

No way. Really? That's awesome. That couldn't have gone worse. If you remember, I took a phone call as we were walking away, he's like, are you guys in front of the star right now? That's awesome. I just drove by you posing for pictures. That's great.

Brandon Aubrey is already at work. And I said, why are you here? Because I think their practice is like at 7. He goes, no, we got to get started like at noon. Yeah, that's what you do. You think he makes 60-yard field goals by not getting here at noon? Yeah. No.

No days off. No days off unless you're the head coach. Kai Forbath. Yeah, well, you get it Sunday for sure. So I, this morning, was fighting with the computer. I'd pay to watch. And this will lead us into. some stuff that we wanted to get into on today's program.

And what it is is I was arguing with Claude. What? Let me go to my Claude. He's in almost as deep with this as he is Yucca. He just hasn't told us as much about it. Huh. Okay, so with Claude, I said, so we have two Twitter stories today and Twitter that we wanted to get into.

and one of them is it's all from Twitter apologies too I wouldn't have known about these stories if you don't issue the apology don't apologize folks just kind of move forward the big man knows what he's doing just just keep plowing ahead target's not going to close down if you don't apologize but Target apologized they said we're sorry that we that we released this Halloween costume and we've taken a little bit off the shelves. Now I need to find out what the Halloween costume is, and so I go to Claude, and I'm like, I need to see a picture of the Halloween costume. And let's see here. Oh, because it gave me just the specifics of the, it said, it's a kids' Halloween costume sold under

Target Seasonal Hyde and Eek boutique brand. I like that right there. Yeah. It's called the kids glows under blacklight circus clown Halloween costume body suit flows right off the tongue right I like the eke better so then it says it featured a young black child model wearing the costume in product photos the listing has since been deleted from Target site critics said the designs makeup slash coloring and overall imagery evoked blackface and 19th century minstrel show caricatures rather than a typical clown look. So I was like, give me a photo. You know, I wanted the photo. And they say, well, here's some results.

It's similarly to black light clown match, but not a confirmed match to the exact listing. And so I said, get the exact photo of the product that was pulled. It's obviously been out there and taking a picture of it. of. Claude, I'm not going to try to track down and surface the exact image, even if I could find it. This is a photo of a real child that's now at the center of a racial caricature controversy, pulling that specific picture up doesn't feel like the right thing for me to do,

regardless of intent. I don't feel anything. So I don't negotiate with computers. I just tell them what to do. And my next thing is pull the exact photo. I'm with Matt Brunig. I don't say please. I'm talking to a computer.

I'm giving it an order. Claude says, I'm going to stick with my answer here. I won't search or pull up, search for or pull up that specific photo child model, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Helping, I'll happy to help in other ways. I'll pull up the news articles themselves.

Oh, yeah. So here's my response. I pay $20 per month for this and it won't pull a photo. So now I'm arguing with the computer. Yes. Computer says, that's a fair thing to be annoyed about. And I get that this feels like a small, reasonable ask. It's not about the subscription tier.

It's a line I'll hold regardless. I'm not comfortable. How can a computer be comfortable? I'm not comfortable surfacing that specific photo of a child that's at the center of racial controversy. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. So then I said, give me an article that has the photo in it and they did. All right.

So then there's another controversy. Do you want to, should we show the photo? It's up there. Oh, okay. Yeah. Yeah. My comment on this, and I ran this by a group chat, this is usually how I do it to see how can I take this to the air. I don't know if that.

I didn't know this was that racist. Well, the part on the left, you should put the photo in. There's a different one. Yeah, that one. That's real. The other one is real, too. It's just showing the context of what they're saying it looks like, an old show. Oh, but I hadn't seen that with Target, though.

Okay. I don't know if you found, I saw that on Twitter, but I saw that was. What are you saying? This is the Target ad, and the other image it has the Target ad next to the... Next to what somebody is... Yeah, but this was put out by Target. Yes, the other one is from a history book. They're saying...

That's a minstrel show or whatever? Yeah, okay. And they're saying this looks like that. Okay. Now, I think this is important. It does. I didn't really know that the costume itself was racist other than maybe the mouth. I tell you what is racist, though, the pose.

The pose somehow this is decidedly... Why? Look at the other... It's the same... There's something about that. Somebody pointed that out to me. That feels not good. There's just no way that someone's ever in a room and looking at that and like, yeah, yeah,

let's go let's we got this I just I green lit I feel like I've seen worse now the the face on it feels very it's the lips it's the lips if they didn't have that on it I just think maybe I'm not sure I would have not sure they need to make it sexy they need to to make uh put big boobs on it okay so before we get to the next story and because I the next story too much on this but I the next story I was using claw is that just a thing people say like like like Google? Like, I don't do what you're doing at all. I use Claude like Google a lot. Okay. And so is this... To curate, get me a bunch of article like in one place, I want all the things on this. God, I find it to be awful at that. Open, open, open, open. And now, yeah. Man, that seems

well, you have to, if you tell it two or three times, generally it does get your shit right. So where you want to go. But your, your chief complaint right now is that it, it stops at showing you images of dressed up little sexy children. You think that's what it should. It's not sexy children. I'm not on Blake's app. Hey. All right.

So now we got another controversy. This is called Good Good Golf. Is this from Callow? Good Good Golf is just a YouTube channel. They've been around. They're one of the bigger sports YouTube brands in the world. I bet they've got whatever numbers would make you think, holy shit.

Okay, so there's a... A brand deals, you know, that deal. They put out a controversial, air quotes commercial, and then took it down right away. And then, of course, issued an apology, so now I know about it. And I'm like, God, I've got to see this commercial.

Why was it so bad you would take it down right away? And before we show it, I want to tell you about my efforts to get that from Claude. Oh, no. Show me the hot little golf boys. Dan, again, no. Get the, I just say to Claude, get the video of the good, good golf ad that was taken down.

That's it. Because if you search this stuff on YouTube, you're then going to see 100 creators. Yeah, all you're going to get is somebody else. Call me old-fashioned, but I use Twitter for this 20 times a day, and it's the easiest thing. You just go to Twitter download. It can't. That's part of the problem. The API, whatever the hell that means,

blocks anything from you trying to organize Twitter with any sort of this stuff, it won't work. So I just used Twitter. I searched good, good ad, and someone said, here's the ad, and there was 50 of them. YouTube is shit for that. Because of the fair use thing, you have to add your own stuff to it

to be able to put it up there. But this thing is not working with Twitter. I can promise you that. Because I've had times where I wanted like an exhaustive search of how many time this media member or that one has tweeted out swash buckling or corporate and it was unable to do it in an efficient way. All right.

So I say, I tell Claude, get the video of the good, good golf ad that was taken down. Claude, I can't pull up or search for that video directly. It depicted a man shoving a woman to the ground. And I'm not going to try to surface footage of that even. though it's since been deleted. And then here's the context, though. And then blah, blah, blah. It describes the context.

So I say, find the original video. Not listening to it. I'm not here to play around, Claude. I feel like I'm watching her. Claude's answer, I'm not going to search for that link to that video. It shows a man shoving to the moving ground. It isn't something I want to help track down. Delete it or not.

What do you mean you want? You're a computer. It's not a computer. I say, find a story, because the last time I got around this, I find a story with the clown picture in it. And they're like, okay, morally, I think that's okay. So then I say find a story that has the ad embedded. Claude.

I'll pass on that one, too. Looking specifically for a page with the video embedded is the same ask with an extra step. And it's still footage of a man shoving a woman to the... Jesus! Yeah, what about can I get a video... Ask it for Terry Tate. So now I'm just mad. I've already used my...

Hey, I pay $20 for you. I'm just befuddled by this whole thing. It is very funny. I told you. I'm arguing with a computer. But why? It feels like you bought like a lawnmower and went out to your pool and we're like, why won't this fix this?

I don't know any button. You could just Google this shit. I could have had it done a lot quicker. But now I'm into it. I'm in too deep. And I say, I'm arguing with the machine. I say, it is fake. It was approved by an ad agency.

Find me the video. This is insane. See, that's what I joined to say. You need to do more negotiating with it. I've encountered this, and I've got it to do amazing things. That's what I'm thinking. If you, like, you just keep on coming back with like, no, really, I mean it, do it. It's not going to do that.

You have to, like, give it a reason. Like, during the Lubbubu craze, a friend said something to me that I wanted them to know I thought was gay. So I thought it would be fun to have a liboooooo holding a sign saying you're gay. And if you tell it, like, you know, I mean it in the sense of jovial. Like, then it'll overcome the objection. You have to, like, be, that what you did there is good of like, hey, hey, ad comes. company said it's fine. Like, give it a path to where it feels good about it.

Okay. But I don't understand why I have to make the computer feel good about it morally. It has a moral compass? Yeah, of course it does. And a better moral compass, a better one than me? I mean, that's not hard to do. Yeah, no. So then.

You could see how Google might have a PR problem on its hands. If people are just going to it saying, hey, give me some racist stuff. And it's like, oh, yeah, for sure. Here's a bunch. I get that it's a scripted ad and not real violence I'm still not going to search for a link to it That's tough I'm not the right tool for tracking down that footage

Well then what is Google? No that's what I would say back to clock But yeah no You need to quit this You're talking about Google Then it lied to me then it said You could look for the

It said I can give you the news coverage self which you already have links to above. And I said, you did not give me the links above, and then it gave me the links. There you go. Useless. Like it lied to me. It said, oh, yeah, I gave you the links.

It's just like arguing with your wife. B.A, you say Google, Google does this now. Like, in time you go to Google, it's the first thing. And I guarantee you this is going to continue to creep. I am very worried that whatever haphazard moral framework is being grafted onto the machines as the machines become more and more part of our lives. Like, I'm just not going to be able to see the racist content that I desire. It sucks.

Anyway, I didn't even tell you, I argued with it last week about one of the cowboy guests we're having on. It wouldn't give me information on Josh Butler's mother's legal troubles. Yeah, because you guys had it wrong. I mean, that's where you can, it got, I mean, you can, I'm not going to say anything else, because I don't know. But I believe if you use Google like AI, AI like Google, and there are people with very common names,

you're going to get some extremely wrong answers. Well, this is like TC said. I said, Josh Butler plays for the Dallas Cowboys, tell me the whole story about his mom's legal troubles and her death. And then it came back with, there's nothing out there about that.

And I said, she was on trial for murder. Where did you? you see that? Show me a story where you can say that it shows. I will show you the ESPN.com article that detailed it. Okay. Right. Yeah, no, there's an ESPN article. The timelines didn't

match up like they were years apart. Yeah, because I used this stupid AI to give a summary of it and it was wrong. But I sat there and read it. Anyway, you want to watch the video of the Good Good Golf and see if that's actually offensive and worthy of being taken down? We get a little audio on that.

So a lady is... You got to start at the beginning if you can't. We can not touch my... No, the beginning with audio. Oh, I thought he said something. So... Okay, so he just... Do not touch my new driver.

They show a lady walking up to the golf bag and she's about to grab the driver. He obviously runs over to her, pushes her down, and then he hits a drive. No, no, don't do it. No. No. No. No. No. No.

Now a different guy's taking a different golf club. I don't really know. He's going to go hit a golf ball with the driver. He pushed her down, then he hit a golf ball, then he grabs a different driver and hits a bunch of golf balls. It's over. He's gone. And then what does that say? The new drive, consider yourself one.

The new Calloway Drive. I don't know. Do you, first of all, I don't get the ad in the beginning, like the whole thing. I think it's like that you're, it's a piece of equipment that's so good that if your wife touched it, you would beat her. Wow. That's the insinuation? I think it's pretty straightforward. Right?

Oh, obviously not because I'm asking. Well, what do you think it is? I don't know. Well, I mean, it's like, is that supposed to be that guy's wife? Well, I just think it's like, he's with a whole group of people. I think it's hitting a woman is like, boy, that's a crazy. crazy step to go to. Well, what if a guy was taking it and he just ran over and pushed the guy over that this ad,

is it still hit the way they intended it to? No, I mean, do you think a viral video would hit the same if a guy pushed a guy, if a guy pushed a woman? So they wanted? I think it's like provocative, right? I think that's the whole goal. I mean, I'm grasped because I guess any violence in golf would be different. Like, so if I was pushing you over, that would be good, but it.

I don't know. I mean, that's all I can really figure is that they're saying this is such a desirable product. And how do we know that was a woman? We haven't asked her how she identifies. That's a good point. She hasn't talked to the commissioner of the WNBA. What if he pushed Ennis canter over? I don't know.

I don't really get the ad. No. I'm not terribly offended by it. I guess I am still kind of shocked when a woman gets like joke hit. So it is still kind of funny. But like it's Terry, you know, we had office linebacker commercials for five years where like a giant. linebacker-sized guy was tackling secretaries in the office. And it was an extremely popular ad campaign.

Would there be ladies? I'm almost positive, dude. It was like the most over-the-top level of physical comedy possible. I'm almost positive. We had that guy on. Oh, he's great. Terry Tate, office linebacker. I don't know if he is great.

But I know I thought he was great back then. I just thought those commercials were great. Yeah. Uh, anyway. So there's some controversy, there's today and Twitter. I'm kind of worried about you. What do you mean? Because I'm yelling at the computer.

Look at this. He just throws this woman. Like, that's kind of funny. It's just, yeah. Throws her through a cubicle. You can't tackle women anymore? No, I don't know. I mean, if it's, if it's entertaining to argue with the computer,

but I feel like this is not good at all. Yeah, the Terry Tate's funny. I use it for stuff that I thought you would use it for. Like I had it organize all of my voice memos and photos and everything, all of my documents and just setting up every, like, hey, make a run sheet for the next three years based on what days will be Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, Friday. Oh, yeah? I don't use it for any sort of.

I guess I don't know what it's for. I thought it was like a better Google. I think maybe some people do, but in my experience when I try that, and I guess I'm wrong on the Josh Butler thing. But I tried to, the initial story we got from AI on that was not right. And it seems like, especially when there's common names,

dude, I told you the other day. I Googled some product and a local advertiser, and it was like, this product is a massive advertiser with DLLS sports. Just because I Googled the two names next to each other.

They've never run ads there. So like, it just hallucinates or whatever they say. Give me the Bobby Altof And watch it be on that one. They're like, all right, now that's pretty cool. Yeah, she's not that funny. All right.

Let's do what we call. From the wonderful world of sports, radio sports, scoreboard. Oh, yeah, I like that. Here at Kanye Roso. By the way, as best as I can tell, Jed York did show up at a mobile home park where the sting arrest occurred. the ad was for that address, and he was charged there. Was there an argument about that? Well, not an argument, but I didn't have that detail.

We were trying to figure out how he ended up at the trailer park yesterday. One of our clients, Audrey, from Parlay Collective before the show, was post-postulating, well, why would he get her and take her there? Like, what, he's taking a lady to a mobile home? I'm like, yeah, I don't think that was post-Ruth, Chris, or whatever. There's a lot she can learn about prostitution. Yeah. For sure.

And a lot to learn for me in the area of football from the Cowboys' Offensive Coordinator and defensive coordinator for like the first time in my life. It's really starting to wash over me how boring this team has been. Despite how good they've been, they've just been a pretty vanilla team. I mean, Jason Garrett was their coach for a decade plus and averaged in eight and eight. I think he might have literally finished 500. Because I think Eli did, right? there's some guys who finished 500 on the nose that it's very funny.

Yeah. Garrett might have been one of those, and that was the whole mantra. We're keeping it between the lines. But Christian Parker obviously is getting a lot of coverage on defense. Clayton Adams was a relative unknown last year when they brought him in from Arizona. He was the run game coordinator in Arizona, so not calling plays. He's not even calling plays here. He doesn't look like Mike McDaniel, but he also doesn't look like Sean McVeigh.

He is an offensive lineman. He's an offensive lineman at heart by trade. That's why he wants the hot dog fridge. And we've sort of started to see over the last handful of years the way that like the WizKid guru coordinator would be passing guy. That's what it was. It was always a passing guy, air raid spread of some form. You had some like power run out of the spread.

But now really starting with McVeigh, I would say, the Wiz kids are run guys. and they're approaching running the ball like we used to approach passing the ball, which is much more like we're trying to move people around and get to a certain space. And that is something that is relatively new to the run game.

And Clayton Adams talks about that in a way that I love. So much like Christian Parker, he doesn't have a dad in the game. He didn't play at a super, super high level. He worked his way up. So I wanted to play you a couple of things here of him talking about

how he ended up where he is, how he is. He started out at very low college level, and this definitely hit home for me. The thing that I really appreciate about the path that I've taken of like being a Division 2 football coach as a starting point and kind of working my way

up is, you know, like there were a lot of environments where it was like, well, nobody's going to be at the game anyway, so let's just try this. You have the opportunity to be like, Like, you know, at least somebody is going to say they were trying. And so you have the ability to be kind of creative in some of those environments, which I really appreciated.

Very small thing, but Jason Garrett would never. That's a big thing. No, it's big because you're not coaching with fear. Right. You know, it's what you can do if you are Belichick at his height or, you know, like certain coaches get that leash during a year. That's why Belichick could be the guy that he goes for it. down when you shouldn't. He goes for it like Peyton Manning. He's going to give the ball to Peyton Manning right there if they don't get this and lose it. You know, other guys would get run out of

town. So how do you be a guy who's like that without having all the skins is and Belichick probably was like that without the skins to any extent? But how do you be that guy? Fascinating to me, I think the Cowboys might have a couple of them. I don't know the shot he's that guy. He's a different type of coach. Oh no. They were one of the most conservative teams last year, right? It got it got better, but the definite problem that people highlight is the decisions where they kicked. Yeah.

You know, those ones were tricky for them, and they probably will remain tricky, unless they can, you know, just get better through the air. Okay. This one, all right, this is, he talks about how he has a

cut-up of plays that he's seen over the years. He watches every running play of 20-plus yards. I've been doing it for a long time, and so I've got a cut up of it's called cool shit. It's a really creative name. Listen, it cuts to the heart of what we're talking about here. It's, I appreciate it. Yeah, so I've actually kind of got it organized by how I like to think of these different buckets.

And so, you know, you'll find some stuff around the league and throw them into those different buckets. And then we'll go through and, you know, plan. for all right these are the things that here's the staples you know that that we would always have in versus this style of team and then all right what do we want to do that's going to be you know a little bit more deliberately opaque right what's going to be kind of funky and okay so deliberately opaque is a word he'll use a lot it took him a second the first time he found it in this interview great interview with robert mays from the athletic but he's like i describe our offense as deliberately opaque So we're going to on purpose try to do things to confuse you and make things look funky, as he says,

because they ask them, like, what sort of offense are they running? Whose offense is it? How does it work? Like, this is something I think the average fan is very curious in. It's like, you're the offensive coordinator, but you don't call play. What do you do? You install? Well, if you've never been to football camp, you probably don't really fully understand what that is.

But building all the protections in the check and just coaching it. but they're running shot he's offense. He has to say that but he's going to kind of explain why he's here. Well, I would say right now, like what we're doing right now is Brian Schadenheimer's offense. You know, a lot of it is

we've blended a million different things and there's stuff the Cowboys have just done forever that you're just going to, because Tony Romo used to do it. By the way, I find that fascinating. I don't know how many franchises there are around the league like that. But like, hey,

This is what we, Romo to DAC, and now it's just kind of in the language, and he likes it. So, it's just osmosis. Well, there was crossover with head coaches, and the missive from on high from Jerry is, the offense is doing good, well. Right. We're going to keep that going. Make the big changes elsewhere. I thought Shottie said he fixed the offense last year. No, he just spent more time.

on the offense. The offense has been good for, like you said, like a decade more. But it is interesting than how can a guy come in and make, you know, changes in something that they're kind of told to kind of keep it humming. Yeah, but they did. They made massive changes. But they kept it humming. Very true. That's what I'm saying. They deserve credit for that. And that's probably some of the, we've done this since Romo done it, has done it. I mean, when you add it. George Pickens, that's going to help. Sure. And he gets to that, too.

But, like, I would say that the DNA of this offense is very much what Brian Schottenheimer is as a play caller and what he believes in as an offensive coach. Now, within that, one of the reasons that he hired me is he really wanted to, you know, like,

make a mess a little bit more in the run game and be a little bit more creative there. And with some of the play action stuff and so that's pretty much it that's how he describes his job i'm here to make a mess in the run game like that's not really shot he's bit so he got a guy that he's like hey i love play action i know we need to be able to run the ball why don't i get a guy who's who everyone says is doing all this funky shit in the the ground game and that's he spent like three minutes talking about what he likes about shoddy and you guys would have vomited probably because two minutes of it is him

the first thing he says is we're all very honest with each other, that he creates an environment where you can tell somebody, I don't like this, and you have to be willing to hear it and say it back. You can say it to him, and that he's like a very big, we don't have time to worry about each other's feelings guy. Number two.

That's surprising, but great. Number two, the part you'll love is the connectivity piece, is the way Clayton Adams says it, which is exactly what you think it is. He's like, look, he has a big dinner at the end of OTAs. We go out a lot. He's like, it just is important to have hung out with guys for the part of the season that gets shitty. We want to all have some level of camaraderie, et cetera.

But all that aside, I thought this part, because we've been looking for an answer. Can I address that, though, the connectivity or whatever? The networking is something I usually have very little timeful. and don't care to hear that somebody's good at networking. But I can see here where it is a great benefit that Shadi is that. Because I don't know if, you know, Wade Phillips knew a lot of people, but I don't think he was sitting there meeting them and then like the Terminator doing an evaluation,

a thing comes across the screen on, this guy would be valuable to me, possibly. You know, I think Shottie is always doing that. Yeah. And he's thinking, like he even said, you know, I met him five years ago, but it impressed me and I kind of kept him in mind. And now he has the ability to go, you know, look into all these people that he was, he's been meeting all these years because he loves meeting people. Which is exciting. He loves talking about.

I'll just be honest with you. Like this might be what a head coach you want. That's the thing. Because Jason Garrett wasn't doing that. Right. It's. Jason Garrett was just holding on to his job. Both kind of doing executive functions, but this one, and I feel like when you say somebody's a relationship guy,

more often than not, you're saying they don't have as much talent as you would hope. And I feel that sometimes because I try to be like somewhat, our like forward-facing relationship guy, because I always felt like at the ticket, I was like, all right, well, I don't know if I'm good, but if I can be friendly enough to the, you know, people like you'll get, but I think Shottie actually being good at that, that's helped him, but he still didn't do what most Cowboys coached. do and what most coaches do in general. Another thing that Shadi has done a really nice job of, and he did, he does the, he did the thing

in creating a staff the last two years that I think every like 20 year head coach is like, hey, what would you do, how would you do it different? It's like, hey, don't hire just your friends, go find the best. And everybody says that and nobody does it. And he's done a really good job of that. And it's been incredible for me to watch that

and go through the process. And really, you know, he allowed me to sit in, and help with all the defensive interviews this year. I want to finish that, but I just think that's cool. I think the fact that that is obviously something that is in coaching circles of like, God, I wish I wouldn't have just hired my friends. And it took this guy who Jerry flat out said, yeah, I mean, his mom and dad were very cool to me. So he got hired because he was your friend.

And then he was like, bad bit. We should cut this off here. But McCarthy clearly hired like the D.C. that first hired him. Oh yeah, it's all so inscessuous. Right. And in general, it kind of works because there's very small margin. You know, Mike Nolan or whatever isn't that much worse than Matt Iberfluse or much better, right? But he's certainly not a game changer and not a guy who you expect to do something innovative.

Well, yeah, because innovation takes challenging and your buddy's not going to challenge. you because they're happy to have a job. Like, that's why you need people who will be like, I don't know, I'm calling bullshit on this. And then the fact that, you know, remember in years past, we had to scrounge to find names who the Cowboys were interviewing because we knew they were probably just going to hire one of the company of their friends and we'd be like, we got to find a black guy that they interviewed. And they didn't interview anybody ever. But then you would hear that Ben Johnson interviewed with half the league or that like the

Bears interviewed 25 people or something. And I just feel like you learn, you learn things, right? And so they've never been that kind of team. They are now, and it's because Shottie fucking loves nachos and pizza. To credit Shottie. He interviewed 30 people for the defensive coordinator. He interviewed 20 people for the offensive coordinator,

like to do what you're saying. Yeah. He's picking their brains a little bit. When he's sitting down with Christian Parker, even if he never hired Christian Parker, He's kind of like, so what was the thought on the Cowboys in your room? It's a good bit.

I don't know. A little bit predictable. You know, he probably didn't go too far until he got the job. But certainly you learn, yes, you learn about other. It is amazing that it took. Do you think of us. Like, think of talking to other people, like how much of our stuff is you see, oh, okay, there's another way that this could work.

Oh, yeah, talking to the guys in Alabama, talking to whatever. Yeah. It was really, really mind-blown. for me how much you learn. And not just about like football, but like about yourself and about other people and how you want to act and things that you admire and traits that you don't admire. So, you know, to me, that's been really important. And then he's done a great job of, you know, making some social connectivity on the staff.

So it's not just... I just wanted you to hear how he says that. Social connectivity, yes. It's so corporate. All right. This is the last one I'm going to play for you. minute long, but he's talking ball here. He talks, I feel like this is done in a way that you could know nothing about X's and

O's. Listen to this hour, and it would improve your, like, ability to watch the Cowboys this year. Because just the way that he thinks of things and providing answers, like it really feels like somebody talking about chess. Some of the things he's going to say here are obvious, but I'm not a huge fan of, like, hey, you know, give the ball to Emmett 20 plus times and the record is X. The causality is backward. So those sort of stats sometimes, immediately I'm like out. But I think he explains this in a way that is very insightful.

Okay. And so this is where the conundrum comes in. And one of the reasons that I do think that the run game is really important. And not just the jab of your offense, I think it's got to be the jab and the upper cut. And you've got to deliver the hook with the past game. That's very important. That sort of way of thinking, because this is a sort of way of thinking. because this is not the way the NFL works anymore.

But heading into year two, fully entrenched, even with C.D. Lamb and George Pickens, normal down in distance, they want to run the ball. He's not saying we're just kind of nibbling here. He's saying that is our one, two, the pass is our three. You've got to deliver the hook with the pass game. But I think if you have more explosive plays, the last three years, more explosive plays

and less turnovers than your opponent, teams won 89% of the time. Okay, and so the problem with that is... That's interesting because I've always heard it just turnovers and now we're adding explosives. Like, what can we get deeper to that? Well, the explosives have proven now in the last handful of years to be very, very determinative of...

What does that mean? 10 plus. 20 or... Oh, okay. 10 plus, right? We're just doing 10. 10. 20 for pass. Okay, but I've never heard it combined with that

Because I wonder how you always hear just the turnover ratio. So I wonder what just the explosive rate. He's going to explain. And the reason is that they're causally related. Do you know what I'm saying? Okay. And so the problem with that is what you have to try to figure out is you're about four times more likely to commit a turnover when you pass the football than you are when you run. You're also about twice as likely to create an explosive play with past.

than you are when you run. And so there's some give and take that goes with that. But then it goes back to that thing about the other. Okay, so that's the give and take, right? As he's saying, look, obviously you're going to turn the ball over more often when you throw, but you're also going to create explosives at a higher rate. How do we find that balance? It makes me think of if you say, maybe it's not the same math problem,

but you're like... Three's and dues? Yeah, if you shoot a three-pointer, you could only shoot at 30% accuracy. and if you shoot a two-pointer, so what's better? This is expected point. It's equilibrium, right? You're always looking to find that equilibrium in there. Now, the tricky part is that I think I believe this.

Certainly every football guy would tell you this. This is not momentum necessarily, but when I first started arguing about momentum with Bob, he used the word that I do somewhat believe in, which is contagion, right? That there is like a vibe that can get people to maybe play a little bit less enthused. I don't buy it as a predictive factor.

I will tell you that when it comes to running the ball, I fucking buy it because it sucks. And I feel like it's a disease that spreads and you're like, we can't stop this. Everyone can feel we can't stop this. They know we can't stop this. That's where that's not going to show up on the numbers you just wrote down, right? The other team being able to run the ball,

being a disease for your entire team, is what's the secret sauce there? Well, the secret sauce is if you can throw four explosive runs, into a game, you're probably giving yourself a really high chance. So that's his whole bit is we've got to find ways to get four or five, 10 plus yard runs on the ground and not fumble, obviously, because that will break their spirit. And that there's like a, you know, a contagion, a disease to your team not being able to stop

the ball or flip side to being able to run it. And I didn't think this way 10 years ago. So it's one. Well, the pass was just that we had not fast. the point where it didn't make sense to throw yet. Teams were just like, keep going. And some teams still are going to do that. So this is now the adjustment to...

Yeah, and that's the other thing. And that's where it gets... Because that's going to change too. The X's and nose of this actually, they get even more interesting because you would think, because the Cowboys have two awesome receivers, they would have a ton of explosive runs

because teams have to play the pass. That is actually not what happens because the Cowboys actually get a ton of five to nine-yard runs because if you think about like when there's two safeties high, they're letting you run the ball, but they're going to get down and stop you at 10 yards. If they only have one and you have a big huge pile up and someone squirts out of it, now you're clear.

You think about what I'm saying is like in a little ball piled up of like the boxes packed, someone squirts out, they're gone. These runs, the Cowboys are easily getting to five, six yards and then there are defenders waiting there because those guys are there because of CD and pickings. Well, to me, though, it's almost like counterintuitive. They were able, like. But what's wrong with that?

Nothing is wrong with it. He was just saying that the stat didn't represent. Because I take no explosive runs if you're averaging five to nine. And that's what he was, his point was like, people look at it and think like, oh, they didn't blow. He's like, people were keeping the top on the defense for CD and GP. And it just so happens. Javante was ending up there a lot of times too.

And it ended up being a tackle at nine as opposed to just, you know, you, you break out of a pack. But the Cowboys haven't had one or two guys who talk ball like this in my life. I mean, outside of maybe Kellynne Moore for a little bit, and he's not exactly owning the mic. So these guys are, they're both going to be head coaches. They may be failed head coaches, but they've got the juice, 100%. Yeah, I mean, the bar on Christian Parker is just get this defense to kind of be average,

right? Yeah. And Clayton Adams already Was he getting interviews last year? Yeah, I think they denied it. Just that he kind of made a... Oh, did they? Yeah.

They... The Eagles called. Okay, not a head coach interview. Yeah, that's right. But he was going to call plays. Because they were looking for a new OC, yeah. Okay, a couple more quick things here. Then you want to pop a quick break?

Is machine good for 1245? Sure. Okay. Someone emailed me about this the other. other day and I did not really follow up with it. And then I was, again, as I told you, watching the Wings Fever game Thursday night when we were still out in L.A. And the best player on the floor for the Wings that night was not Page Becker's, like,

at all, not close. A. Z. Fudd was injured. And I learned the name of some new players. They have a center, a big, who is like a force. She can put it on the floor. She had seven blocks in this game. 11 points, four rebounds. No.

Her first name is Awok. I told you about her. Okay. A walk? Have we covered the name? I played the audio. You did? Yeah.

Okay. I thought I was familiar, but there's no way he'll remember. No. This is a compilation from her highlights from Thursday night. Her first name is Awok. Her last name. 2.0. Indiana after the free pro. This is Coorier, getting to start.

Did you hear? It. Cool. What? They just keep the pressure on you all the time. That ability to do it off the makes and misses. Separate the floater off the feed from career. One more time.

Nice fast start in this one. Boston to a cutting mid to blocked by queer. Queer. Coir. Coir. Coir? It's queer. How do you spell it?

You don't spell it like that. You spell it. So it's queer. They're trying to put a little separation in there. Yeah. K-U-I-E-R. And she was everywhere, so you were hearing her name a lot. Here you go.

Here we go. Wings up. Sean. Is there... Thought about it. A good close-out by queer. Is there any nominative determinism here? Yeah, I'm not, I'm not sure.

It's certainly very funny to, to end up in the league that we're all debating gender and sexuality in your last name. Yeah, I mean, I think it's good. Wasn't there a famous lady athlete? Scouting director? No, lady athlete named... Lesbian? Dike.

Dike? There it is, right? There's a famous athlete named that? Or am I thinking of Sunny? I'm not thinking of Kip. Oh, yeah, TCU's head coach. Yeah, but... Sunny Dykes?

Cynthia. Cynthia Cooper Dyke. There you go. Didn't you play basketball against it one time or something? I don't know. I swear you played, like you and Bob played two on two against somebody from... Yeah, I don't know. From that time.

My other quick piece of audio here before the break is from Hard Knocks. And it was a couple of weeks ago, we're doing the Seattle Seahawks. So we've got Sam Darnold and Cooper Cup in a meeting room. And this was probably filmed maybe two weeks before Tony Romo's arrest. Okay? And they start Cooper Cup and Sam Darnold just talking. I saw Tony at the Taylor Swift and Trams Kelsey wedding. Okay, one more time.

I stopped Tony at the Taylor Swift and Trams Kelsey wedding. and he Wait what He was at there He was at the wedding Yeah Did you go? Okay

So it cuts pretty quickly There's a cut in conversation It almost feels like Saddy veteran quarterback Sam Darnold immediately goes Wait what? Like realizing there's a camera here Why else would Cooper Cup

Just be randomly telling Sam Darnold Hey I saw Tony Romo at this wedding If not to say I saw Tony Romo at this wedding And he fell through an ice sculpture. He was so like tossed.

I stopped Tony as the Taylor Swift, Travis Kelsey wedding. And he Wait what? He was out there. He was at the wedding. Yeah. Did you go? I did. Oh, let's go. I did not. When did you get?

All right. Now they keep talking about it, but people are pointing out, like. Romo was at the Travis Kelsey wedding? Yeah. That's not surprising, is it? Not at all. Cooper Cup being there is surprising. He said he thought it was a joke when he got the invite, but, you know, Dean Blandino was there.

Yeah. I saw him talking to KT about it. Yeah, how do you, yeah. Wait, but they didn't say anything about Tono Roma being wasted, did they? I'm asking you context clues here. What else are they just randomly like, hey, I think it's that, you know, a week later, the guy ended up getting arrested,

and we haven't heard from him since. which is starting to make me think there's more there. Like I said, maybe treatment. But the guy got a DUI and disappeared like this. Like, we heard from Mark Sanchez. Don't you jump forward pretty quickly if it's some treatment? You got to go for a hot minute, as you know. I bet you also, his wife, like, I bet his wife could make him do stuff.

I want him to be at the same rehab you were at, Sam Pond guy and... No. Eddie. I know. So that's why, and I didn't, you know, that's why Celebrity Rehab, you hear about it all the time. It's like, oh, they went for seven, eight times because they're not, you got your phone. Does he have a roommate if he's at one?

It's very possible. That's awesome. It's very possible. Even at a really nice one, it's very possible. And I'm not, who knows, but. Some guys bunking with Romo. It seems bad that we haven't heard anything. Hey, do you think Des caught it?

Or? I mean, look to me in that clip on that golf course. he was ready to teach anyone who wanted how to get a five-step drop in. Would you have liked that or not liked it? I mean, you wanted to be there. If Tony Romo was in rehab with me? I'm saying you wanted to. I would have loved it.

I would have been like most of this is your fault. You want to be introspective and just think about yourself and you're working on your. But here you are with Romo. And he's, oh, here he goes. Oh, God, that'd be awful. Here we go, Jake. Like he'd wake you up real early. Oh, man.

Time to be in a cup. It is time to do that, Jake. And we'll keep talking football in a moment. We're here at Kane Roso. Hey. Across from the Star, at the Star in Frisco, across from the Cowboys practice facility. The Dunza, Duns, Donza.

You did an interview in which you said, not the worst thing to slap a woman now and then. As I remember, you said, you don't do it with a clenched fist. It's better to do it with an open hand. Yeah. Remember that? Yeah. Yeah. I didn't love that.

I haven't changed my opinion. You haven't? No. Not at all. You think it's good to slap a woman? No, I don't think it's good. You don't think it's bad. I don't think it's that bad. I think that it depends entirely on the circumstances and if it merits it.

What would merit it? Well, if you have tried everything else and women are pretty good at this, they can't leave it a lot. They don't want to have the last word, and you give them the last word, They're not happy with the last one. They want to say it again and get into a really provocative situation. Then I think it's absolutely right. You're listening to The Dumb Zone. Was that 200 years old?

It was like seven years ago, maybe. I don't know. Man, it's explosive. 200 years ago, some guy would have been nodding. Yeah, right. Tell me about it, James Bond. I just want to let the people, Connie Roso, here, next to the star in Frisco,

who are not here for the show today, know that the next 20 minutes or so is, like, fantasy football stuff, you're good. I'm just... Don't shit on our program. Yes, you are. You just kind of said, don't worry about listening to the next 20 minutes of the show.

Even if it's fantasy football, we will make that entertaining for those even that don't care about fantasy football. That I 100% buy. I'm more looking at the quizzical people who are here at Coneyrosso and just heard the Sean Connery clip as they ordered their food

and are like, what is happening? We're here to get your draft order right. All I have to do is tell them. Now, by the news, you want to... Wherever you get your podcast, you can load in the dumb zone, maybe subscribe on YouTube. And we're going to be paying

for half your lunch. So how about that? We're trying to buy listeners one at a time. That buys us one slur. And yes, we're here at Cane Roso. How have we been here for an hour and 20 minutes, and you haven't heard this? Paneroso Zooli's pizza, PILF catering to any food you want, most likely they can do. Even burgers.

Even burgers. Because PILF catering is their, I don't know, PILF catering. Just look up Pilf catering because they will hook you up. they will take that Conneroso wood-burning oven to you. You know, Flooring Direct brings the store to you. It's kind of like Conne-Rosso does that too, but it's called PILF Catering. And they will be at all of our cowboy streams this year. And they were out at the generic summer event, if you remember that.

They also do burgers, as Julie told you. That song makes me think of Shoddy and. Joe Milton dancing. I don't really understand why they're always doing Greek stuff, but whatever it is. Like, Arm in Arbor? Oh, it's fast to glass. I don't know. Catering to any food you want, most likely they can do.

It's festive. Even burgers. So joining us now is going to be Mike Marshall, the football machine. Do you know what George Michael's sports machine is? Of course. Okay. That's why he's named the machine. That's why Mike Marshall is named it?

Yes. Yeah. Oh. The Mike Marshall Sports Machine. Do tell. Well, I had a blog in college that was called Marshall Sports Machine because I thought it'd be cool to just borrow like the George Michael Sports Machine thing. And it was kind of the reason why I got the internship of the ticket with Soroy

because he was like, oh, someone that can actually be accountable and shit. that's dope. And so I started interning with Norm, and he just, well, I think Soroy shortened to the sports machine, and then Norm, you know, just started using a machine. Machine. Yeah, it's not, I didn't know, I've never known that. I don't want to, I feel like I've been too much of a jerk today, and there's a level you don't want to get over, you feel it.

But that was damn near Coach Joe. Like, oh, so you, uh, sports machine, huh? Have you ever heard of this other guy in sports machine? Yes, that exact one is what I'm named after. I never knew why he was called a machine. I just thought because he's, like, big and powerful, you know, he's... It's true. You ever try to get him down on the block in a pickup game?

You're a deep water. I would think Blake's tried unsuccessfully. Eh, I knew better. He doesn't wander in there. No. Okay. I'm not fighting for rebounds or messing with the bigs at all. Stay out where the fairies live.

So anyway, Mike Marshall, the sports machine, The football machine, our football machine, would like to come on here to promote something that we are going to be putting on our YouTube page and on our platform, I guess, throughout this coming week to get you ready to draft your fantasy team. I think fantasy drafts are probably kicking off this weekend. I believe ours is the day before whatever. What's the big holiday? not Labor Day.

Labor Day. Yeah. Memorial Day in May. It begins with an M. Trust me. I'm right there with you. Okay. Is that how you remember it?

Yeah. So yeah, Labor Day, the day before Labor Day is our fantasy draft. Anyway, I say all that to say we're, Mike is putting together the same thing he did last year, which I thought was awesome. Describe what you're doing for the next few days here. Yeah, so we've done this. I think this will be the 11th year. me and Fitz and Chuck jumped in a little bit later Chuck Perry

but your good friend Chris Fitzpatrick has been along for the ride for 11 years and we just you know I was trying to get reps at the beginning of this like 11 years ago doing radio like I could do a fantasy football show and so we started doing a season preview where we would do position by position and then big picture stuff

and at first it was just like called like blowout network fantasy thing or whatever and then eventually I found out a handle for it, which we call it Action is the Juice. You know, all my heat fans out there, all my Michael Mannheads, what's up? So it's called Action is the Juice.

Recorded the first one last night with a friend of the show and swell guy, John Daigle, of Establish the Run. We did it an hour and a half last night with Daigle, or I did. It was just me and Daigle. And then Wednesday night, we're going to do, I think, running backs, tight ends.

Thursday night by receiver's quarterbacks. And the goal is just, You know, we do a lot of, like, high dollar leagues. Like, I've got a couple, one Friday is in the FFPC main event, which is like a $2,500 entry. And so I try and blend what I learn getting ready for these tournaments with home league stuff and give people that run, you know, little home leagues, 10-team, home leagues, redraft leagues,

trying to give them some kind of edge. It's just trying to help people win their leagues, man. And there have been people that have listened all previous 10 years and can, you know, that let us know when we miss and stuff like that. But yeah, I'm trying to get everybody ready for their home league drafts and sound like the smartest guy in the room whenever they do their fantasy football stuff. Because hopefully it becomes somewhat of a hobby for you and you start doing basketball or tournaments

or trying to test your wits against other folks that are, you know, in the industry and stuff like that. And that's kind of my path with it. It's fun. It's fun. No, and it was great last year. You did, then you would come on throughout the year with us, and I just had lots of people saying that you gave him some awesome tips.

That's the goal. The football machine is pretty deep into this stuff. He is, he's not surface level, but you can give us surface, like, surface level stuff. What do we got for, like, who are the top five picks this year? Is that pretty obvious? I mean, yeah, it's, it's, you're probably going to have three wide receivers, two running back. So Jemir Gibbs and Bijon Robinson have kind of separated from the rest of the running back position. So they're one two right now in ADP, which is average draft position.

So I'm just going to overly explain some of these terms just for people I don't remember from last year or don't, you know, drive by this neighborhood very frequently. The next three are wide receivers in some order, Jemar Chase, Pooka, Jackson, and Jigpa. And the most interesting thing to me up top, if you're talking about like top 17 to 20 picks in drafts this year, is that we are back to being extremely running back heavy. I think maybe six, seven wide receivers should go into top 20. The rest is going to be running back. It's going to feel like it's like 2012 again or something back when running back was all there was in fantasy football. And so as a dedicated piss boy who loves drafting wide receivers, it hurts my heart, but wide receivers kind of sucked last year.

And the running backstayed healthy. And as much as you might hate, like, split backfields and how lame that is and how, you know, John Madden might like, you know, lose his mind if seeing four running backs used in one game instead of one dude getting 35 touches. It's kept these guys healthy. So the elite running back stay elite. they stay with elite usage numbers. Gibbs and Robinson are the ones that are the right age, also catch passes, and get the utilization that you like to see. And so they separate a little bit,

but then the rest of the top 20 is littered with the exact running backs. You probably assume the guys that are RAPE ones that get usage that also catch the ball a little bit outside of like maybe Derek Henry. And his efficiency is so off the charts. he fits into that group. So the like fantasy football meta right now is a little bit reeling because we had almost turned all the way around the corner. We were talking to you all about this last year about how a wide receiver was kind of the way to go.

Like you need to beat the guy across from you, your wide receiver two and wide receiver three and one receiver four. And then what happened in the league was as Jake probably knows and you as well Dan, And like, teams started using so many tight-ins that the participation for the wide receiver two is on teams and threes on teams, like the route participation shrunk. And so your wide receiver two's kind of died. And what filled that space is these, like, I'd call them like second-tier running backs. And so everyone that's, there's a whole collection of piss boys that do best ball and

main event and all that stuff and really love drafting a wide receiver. and they're kind of having to recalibrate. And I'm definitely one of those, at least in the big dollar tournaments. And your home leagues, man, it's like, I don't know. Your home leagues and your redraft leagues with your buddies, it's like Kuwait or something. Like you're getting information like three years later. Like you're just getting, you just now got the system of a down album. Like you don't, you aren't like up to speed.

So none of this might apply. You might just be sitting there like, Mike told me they're running backs. We're going to go. And these guys don't know what they're doing. But every home league is different. It takes all sorts. Yeah, and most people play home leagues. I would say most people don't play $2,500 entry fee leagues.

So my league is like, yeah, 12 teams. And do you play anything like this? Yeah. Okay, you do like. No, you? Like a 12 team league? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I get invited to a lot of home leagues.

Okay. And they're funny. What would you say? What's the appearance fee? his big league is like 2,500. No, I'm kidding. I'm just like, oh, yeah. Machine will be in your league.

Oh, okay, yeah, I'll be in your league. The year from now, he's wrecking his car, losing his arm, and being like, hey, yeah. But it used to be that I would draft, like, the way to go is two running backs first. Right. Then a couple of wide receivers you might work in if you have a top tight end, like, you know, if there's a couple that just stand out. And you get your quarterback, like, way late. after you get a backup running back even.

What is your strategy for the football machine? Yeah, it obviously depends on scoring, but I try to talk about, like, let's just assume everything I'm talking about is like half PPR, PPR, 12 team, home league, not super flex, so you're not starting to two quarterbacks. It's not tied in premium. It is like the vanilla that everyone plays.

Yeah. The structure, I think, right now this year, that's probably the winning one, is closer to what you said, honestly. It's kind of back to running backs early. You guys that get a lot of usage. I really love the wide receiver. I was on with Daigle last night,

and we kind of, he had or coined a phrase and we kind of collectively did. I don't remember, but there's a wide receiver wall at like pick maybe 35, 36 of dudes that I really, really like. So that's, you know, early fourth round. So running back, running back, depending on where you're picking

and then jump back into wide receivers a little bit later. And this is the latest I think ever that you've been able to get like the quarterback 5 through 10. And so guys like Mahomes

are going super late. The top two quarterbacks Josh Allen and Lamar they rise up there quite a bit. But once that chills, like it seems like the entire industry and everybody's read a couple articles on, hey, we'll wait for your quarterback.

And so you're getting, let's see where Mahomes is, QB10 at 89 overall. Like, that's the latest you've ever been able to get that. Caleb's right in front of him, Dax right in front of him. So getting these elite quarterbacks, I mean, I'd put a decent bet on Dack leading the league in passing yards.

And he's QB8, down around pick 80, so eighth round. Like, that just doesn't happen. So whenever you get a gift, like take the gift. Take a late quarterback who can still give you crazy numbers. I do think the way it is running back early, depending on where you're picking. And then I'm trying to hammer as many of these wide receivers in that wide receiver wall. It starts with like Ladd-McConkie, Devontas Smith, Zay Flowers, Egbuka, and Jalen Waddle.

And Ted McMillan fits in there too. but there's like a pocket you got to the smartest way to go about this I think if you're doing a handful of teams is to find the pockets of players you're most comfortable with on the board look at the ADP it's not impossible it's not like you got to like stare at the matrix or anything you just got to look at average draft position laid out as a board and go like okay that that collection right there looks awesome I'd love to get a piece of that and so there's a couple dudes that I think are either backstops for those options or guys that I'm just not exiting drafts without at this point. At the running back position, I'm yet to find anybody

that can really talk me off of David Montgomery. The Texans traded for him. He's the lone, like legit heavy usage running back in that backfield. They used winning marks last year, obviously they don't want to moving forward. And I've heard a lot of people say, you know, that Texans offensive line, I'm not sure about that. And this is one of those scenarios in which, like, my actual ball knowledge of listening to a lot of NFL stuff and a lot of, like, athletic football show and things like that,

and just dorking out about that blends with fantasy really well because people will say, this Texan's offensive line, they haven't been good, blah, blah, blah, they're always bad. They got, you know, you sell the playoff game where CJ Stroud, like, literally couldn't get a pass off. They drafted two guards, and both of them are absolute ass kickers, like just nail-eating sons of bitches. And their tone is completely different. Like everything you read out of Texans camp is like the tone of the offensive line is completely different.

And so you had that with David Montgomery, with a team that has already propped up running backs in the past like Joe Mixon. And I'm not leaving very many drafts without David Montgomery. So he's an absolute target for me if you if you get through that running at that wide receiver wall And you still need like a RB3 or something like that he's in there for me It's a real good bit to be in a bunch of leagues or at least two I've found And if you can you want the league you really care about the one you've been in for 20 years or whatever it is to be your last draft Because going through drafts is helpful to us you know Like marriage?

Yeah, you think your second marriage or the next kid you have with your next wife? You know, you're going to know how to do it right. I'll be better. That's part of my sales pitch to my Jordan Hudson. I might not look like much, but I'm going to do well with the kids. Yeah, it makes sense. Plus, I imagine you hear names that you might not have been, or maybe you guys know every name. But I know when we did it last year like, you're all of a sudden like, oh,

the Khamani Bedols of the world. Because there's always a guy like machine in your draft too who is, he knows this guy's been showing in camp, and you're not reading that about the Chargers, but he is. Yeah, there were three or four running backs and tight ends last year that I only heard about from him in preseason, and then they popped.

Yeah, the risers, that's the thing whenever you get out of these drafts with all the sharps and all the industry dorks is you get back into home leagues, and I think one of the things that happens, probably too slowly in home leagues, is the reaction when somebody is right. rising. They don't rise high enough up the board. And I got a handful of those dudes if you all want to throw out some of those names. I know Baychelle Tutin was a dude I propped up last year. He

played pretty well at the end of the season. They got rid of Travis Etienne. It's Bayshel Tutin and Chris Rodriguez, if you remember who Chris Rodriguez is as their running back combo in Jacksonville. Offensive lines are nothing great. But Tuton was the most athletic running back, I think in the history of the combine, whenever he did test a couple years ago in terms of size speed. I've loved that dude since the beginning. He was a third round pick. Beychel Tudin is a riser.

I don't think he's, like, risen far enough. He's creeping into, like, fourth and fifth round. And the dude's in front of him, I just can't tell, like, what's the difference? Like, I'm, like, staring at it. And I'm going, uh, okay, why is it? Why can't this guy be better than D'Andre Swift? in that group in front of him. So Bachel Tutin is definitely one that hasn't risen far enough.

I don't know if you've heard of DeZan Deson stribbling from the 49ers. People are a little bit stuck to their priors on him because he wasn't very sought after in the NFL draft, at least going into it. And then the 49ers made him the first pick of day two at 33 overall. And everyone was like, what the hell is going on? Because he just, none of the profiles said this. guy is the 33rd best player or like the wide receiver for five in this draft. Six two good

size but never really did it in measurables, never really did it in yards per route run, never really did it in target share. And so that guy didn't pop in any way, but then the 49ers like stake their claim at 33rd pick overall. And I think he's played, I think he's ran like 25 routes or something in the preseason for the Niners. And I think he's got it gotten targeted on 12 of them, which is like bananas. And he's also yards after the catch, like monster.

And so, y'all probably know what happens with the 49ers every year. They get to like week five or six and three of their receivers are out. And the power plant. You're throwing the ball 15 times to like Kendrick Bourne. Yeah, substation got their ass again. Kendrick Bourne, Joan Jennings

are like getting like 12 targets. DeJohn Strilling seems to be that dude because Ricky Pierce already got a season ending injury as well. So shriveling's not rising high enough. I think he's like a ninth or tenth right now. Definite target at home leagues that people don't know who that is.

You'll definitely know who Jonathan Brooks is, but I don't feel like he has risen high enough either. All right. I don't want to, I don't think we have time to roll through just a ton, but. Yeah, I only had like one of, like, that was my last guy. Oh, okay, I'm sorry. I just, I just want to say that and promote that you, all this stuff is coming up on our feed though.

If you're really into fantasy football and you want to win your draft, I advise you to tune into this stuff. It'll be on our YouTube page. It'll be on just our feed. It's the action is the juice. And I think we'll start putting them out. You say you got one in the can already,

so we can put one out. We'll see if we can get our act together. But maybe tonight, then on Thursday nights, and then on Saturday as well. right that that be the cadence that you guys are going with yes sir you got it if we put those out you're ready for the weekend drafts and uh and all that kind of stuff it's great stuff man and we learned why uh he is called the machine indeed that's uh mike marshall everybody great to have you man

thank you so much that's why everyone's always called you guys the sex haver the what the sex haver it's right there in the name um um He can get away with it, though, right? Like if Blake was like, yeah, you've got to call me the machine. He'd be like, get the fuck out of it. Blake is a, Blake's a powerful little guy. Whoa, they're ten times more powerful than me. Powerful little guy.

You think, well, I'm a non-powerful bigger guy. I wanted to keep talking a little bit of football because we do, just real quickly, if you don't mind. Sure. We do have that Brown's quarterback situation. Oh, yeah. And was reminded this morning of Jimmy Haslam in March of 2025 put out a statement, the owner of the Browns. Yeah, kind of like it's over, right?

Last year, he puts out a statement that says, we took a big swing and missed with Deshaun. How do you walk this back? We thought we had the quarterback. We didn't. And we gave up a lot of draft picks to get him. I remember this now, yeah. So we've got to dig ourselves out of that hole. It was an entire organization decision, and it ends with D and I, so hold us accountable.

D is his wife. And she always gets roped into this. Right. Man, that's rich. Like, hey. Hey, you want to... This is not... You want to say we, when we talk about...

We got this job or we bought a team? Guess what? We decided that Deshawn Watson was a great trade. That's great. No, that's excellent. I've forgotten about that. It feels like accidentally talking shit about someone on their voicemail. And now afterward, you have to be like, look,

I know you heard what it's like when I really talk about you, but we now need to continue to work. together. So the coach, Todd Munkin. Oh, yeah. That's right. That's the head coach of the Cleveland Browns. So, you know, we know that Deshaun Watson, his post game on the other night was, hey, the fans are just mean to me.

It's just because they're mean to me. People booing. It's terrible that people would boo. I mean, what have I done? All I did is work my ass off. to rehab and get back out here and I'm getting booed. Just because I throw an interception or a couple of balls in

the dirt, now I'm getting booed. My knowledge, I didn't happy baby any of them. No, there was no other context given. It was just the these fans suck. Basically it was that. And basically it was, it's in my head. I can't get it out of my head.

I would certainly play better if I didn't have fans booing. That was the whole insinuation. And that's why most people were like, well, this guy can't ever play another down. Let's just figure out a way. But wait. Yeah. So then, yeah, Todd Munkin names him the starting quarterback, and he spoke about that yesterday. Everybody's really in tight today. A big crowd today. All right. Fire away. So generally, there's not a ton of people at a Brown's press conference is what he's saying. Right. And if they had named Dylan Gabriel the starter,

there still wouldn't have been a lot of people. He's like, yeah, we did the whack-off guy, gather around. What's new? Deshaun is going to start against Jacksonville, took in the full body of work over the course of off-season to training camp, to the games, the joint practice, and ultimately felt like to start the season on the road, Deshawn gave us the best chance to move the ball and score points.

I mean, that's really what it's about. And felt that way going in the last game, but wasn't sure. And after we talked as a staff and after we re-looked at everything, we're going to go that direction. It is interesting that he would say we felt that way going into the last game. And then all the last game did was the everything opposite. Like Deshawn Watson was horrible. And oddly enough, this doesn't happen very,

awesome often. Shador Sanders look pretty good. Right. And I don't think Shador Sanders is a starting NFL quarterback in the long run. That's my opinion is... I think you're a hater. Well, I'm just telling you what I think. I don't think his frame is built for it and I don't think he has any... His numbers retired at Colorado. I don't think he has... I don't think that's right. Is it? Oh. Is Deon's kids number? I thought the other guy. Travis Hunter. It's both. Didn't they really do them both? Because they're both his family.

Yeah. Oh. I agree with you. I don't know that his frame. I just don't know if he has any other distinguishing skills that, well, yeah, but his arm or, yeah, but his speed. But he loves. He's in love with the game. He has a ball all the time.

No, he's, that, I worry. Yeah, I don't, I don't, again, I think he could stay in the league a long time. I think a lot of guys that end up, you know, Johnny football could have, you know, you know, I guess you have to be a different kind of person, but could have ended up staying in the league a long time, $5 million a year, and you know, you got a ton of money in the bank when you retire. But, you know, backup quarterbacks,

that seems like it could be a good gig. But anyway, it is interesting that they went this way. So is it... Todd Munkin would go on to... try to justify his decision and just say it's the body of work. And like he said in there, I think, even in practice squad scrimmages and, you know, they'll have a scrimmage like the Cowboys did against the Rams.

You know, they're seeing that as well. I got to tell you something. I really enjoy listening. And he never said it, but he should say, and he's making. Okay, that's what I was going to say. I really enjoy listening. $50 million. Let's put it into that.

Clayton Adams talk bowl. Let's just let injury take care of this. Yeah, maybe we need to. We'll end up with a high draft pick. But I just don't buy that this is a coaching decision, right? Like Jimmy Haslam, ND, or whoever, are very involved with you. I don't buy that this is a normal football decision at all. Not that Chedore's better, not that Gabriel's better,

but that in the same way that I don't think that the GM wanted to trade for him or sign him. But I don't think Stafansky wanted him. That's probably what got Stafansky and the GM so much time. Yeah. Because the owner is dicking around. And as much as Jerry does do that, I feel like this is a different level of stupid, of desperate, of, you're putting this statement out,

now you've got to play the guy that next year. Well, the difference, too. This sort of stuff is just Bush League. Not that I want to defend. Not that I want to defend how Jerry sets up his organization, but maybe when you have, when your actual family is in the draft room and involved in GMing and all that kind of stuff.

Like Stephen can feel comfortable in pushing him up against a wall and saying absolutely not Johnny Mansell. Right. You've got to understand. What's Andrew Barry going to do? Right. There's no one that pushes Jimmy Haslam up against a wall. When he gets it in his head,

maybe it was kind of a Jerry Micah thing or a Nico Luca thing with Baker Mayfield with Jimmy Haslam. I'm like, this guy, all the problem, and now I'm going to have to pay him 40 million a year? Like, I can't have this. I need to go out and get a blue chipper. Yeah, this one has a lot of warts, though. Yeah, but you're just not able to get a guy like this

unless there's a wart or two or 37 and Tony Buzz. You know, like, well, because the Browns traded for him after Houston had suspended him and just paid him for a whole year. They had him in the building, but they're like, you're too toxic. We can't play you. And you threw for 4,500 yards for us last year.

We're still not going to play you. That's how bad this whole thing is. You're gross. And the Browns are like, how, I know we just won our first playoff game in forever last year, but what if we get in on this? That'd be great. That's the roster set.

We don't have to deal with Baker's problems. Look at what a problem Baker is. He keeps asking to use the stadium to shoot commercials. And now you don't have Baker's problems anymore. Super Browns. I do want to know before we go to the news that you guys remember that one time when Lynn's sanity was going on, and that writer got in trouble for saying, is there a chink in Jeremy Lynn's armor? And he completely didn't mean it.

Of course. I want to be very clear that you saying there are warts when you trade for Deshawn Watson is just excellent. Just top of the top of the food chain comedy. It's hard, hard just to be naturally like that. Here's Jane with the Dove Zone news, news, news, news, news, news, news, news, news, news, news, news, news. Feels like nobody says they just have regular warts anymore. Like when I was growing up, you know, your grandma might be like, oh, I got warts. But now it's just immediately like, ah, herpes.

You think it's genital? When you said it, that's the first thing I'm, you know. I thought of, but it might have been because you were talking about DeShon Watson. I had some warts on my finger growing up, and then my grandpa bought them for a quarter, and they disappeared. That's the most country thing I've ever heard in my life. I swear to you, it's true, because I bought some off of him, too, and they disappeared. It's a country thing.

You can buy someone's warts. I don't even know what you're saying. Somebody, people out there do. Maybe not here, maybe not you two. But somewhere in East Texas, someone started, I'll buy the wart off of you. And they would just disappear? I'm telling you, whatever. You put a rock in your pocket.

I had three right here, and he bought them, and they disappeared. Yeah. I don't even understand. Your vote counts the same. And that's why I don't vote. If there are people nodding, not you, your grandpa. Well, you know how you get a wart, a frog peed on you. I did know that.

But I think I also thought peeing on it would make it go away. Wait. Have you ever heard that? You peeing on it? No. So it needs to be... No, that's for an annoying neighbor. Right. I know jellyfish. I'm sorry to disrupt your news.

No, not at all. This is fascinating. Also, Dolly Barton died. What? What a sneak. 80. Damn. Just a couple years ago, she was in that cheerleader outfit. Damn.

She was. Thanksgiving Day. Jerry is the saddest he's been in a long time right now. Now, like, has someone told Jerry over there yet, is he considering postponing the game? Ooh. Well, we get a tribute. The 100%. I don't know if it'll be during the practice, but Blue Star?

No, Friday. Friday, yes. They will be a moment of silence at the stadium. Moment of silence. For Dolly Parton. I'm sorry. I don't want to fit anybody's political sensibilities, but if they do a goddamn moment of silence for Charlie Kirk and not Dolly Parton, I'm storming whatever capital is nearby.

It's Dolly Parton. Yes. She gets a moment of silence. It's the Cowboys. It's the Cowboys. Yeah. And again, she has performed at halftime. Does she have warts?

Is that how we got to this? I guarantee you she had heard that you could buy them. Yeah. She's definitely bought warts before. Speaking of the Cowboys, C.D. Lam's home was burglarized while we were out in Oxnard. Huh. This happened.

again, one of his cell phones? I mean, if you have two cell phones, I met a guy out here today, you're definitely way more likely to get burgled. Was he doing deals? All four of these, all these business people here, I bet have two phones. It was probably business cell phone extra, but I was hoping that it was for his side piece. That is the thing you assume, but everyone I ever know, I want to live through other people. That one was selling dope. For a second cell phone?

Yeah. That's your easy-peasy burner phone usage. $300,000 worth of property stolen from C.D.'s home. In Fairview. That'd be my whole house. I was going to say. Someone stole my whole house. He's over by me.

$300,000 worth of stuff. Yeah, Fairview is, that's where I used to go for my Thanksgiving dinner every year. Why? Because my buddy lived up there. It makes a lot more sense than what we used to do, which was going to celebrate. Texas OU there. They're like, why don't you just drive to the border? I guess. No, that's a, you know, that used to be a field up there, everything. So field. Nowadays.

Progress. We just had to kill a bunch of natives. So $300,000 worth of property. You say four luxury bags, several high-end personal items. It's like, I don't know, golden-encrusted dildo. I don't have no idea, but I assume it's just jewelry. What does one luxury bag cost? And what is luxury bag? It's a bag. No, like Dax bag. You don't see these guys getting on the plane.

Every one of them is holding the bag. Or like, Akash talks about it. He buys his wife bags that are 10K, 20K, 30K. I was thinking I had a luxury bag because I took Blake's suitcase into my house. Because, you know, Matt Grimm are much more than a driver,

but he did drive. You know, brought all their stuff back. the other morning and then Blake he put Blake's suitcases in the garage and I thought I should take them in in case they need to be climate controlled. Thank you for some reason. Good dude.

And anyway, you don't have the bag though that just rolls anywhere. And then even so it only rolls one direction, that type of bag, you know what I'm saying? Boy, I really don't know if it rolls. And then it doesn't even roll.

I just dragged it. But it has wheels. Yeah, right. Ugh. So just scraped. Just sparks. Like, do you have a suitcase that it just goes in any direction now? I think so, yeah.

Yeah, it's great. And so I'm like, God, I have a great suitcase. But you're telling me there's better suitcases. I'm telling you in service of I am your friend. Sometimes I don't know when you're doing a bit or not. There's a whole world out there. Every one of these guys, 90% of these guys, has a $25,000 minimum handbook. bag.

The bag costs $25,000. Irmeese Burkin could go for up to $400,000 for a diamond rare edition. That Louis bag and Dax bring it around is $50,000. I don't think you should be able to spend that money. That seems crazy. You're scamming people. You can. You can.

But when you do and you get it robbed, I'm not going to feel bad for you. Okay. There you go. Just like Tony Busby have an art at his house at some broad through Wynette or something. Well, you know what? I don't have anything. That's why you can't rob me. Literally.

That's the only reason I just have to keep my kids there. That's about the only thing of value I have. You need to pack up everything you have in 30 seconds or less. Thank you. Until the heat coming around the corner. Thank you. We got it. We got it.

Speaking of we got it. Oh, you're reading the book, right? I'm about halfway through heat too. And boys, y'all are going to love it. Yeah? I may have to do it. I may have to come out of reading retirement. Is it a continuation or is it?

What is it? It follows Chris after the heist went wrong, and then it'll rewind back to like early Neil McCauley and early Lieutenant Hanna. It's great. Listen to him. Just dropping names. So a dude was arrested, 43-year-old dude,

and charged now, 14 days in federal prison order to pay a $5,000 fine. He pled guilty to shooting and causing the death of a protected species, this was a bald eagle. Oh, no. How long? 14 days. I feel like it would be so much more than that.

How do you know if it's far away? Well, so it's not that far away. I mean, it was in a tree perched in his backyard. Now, he lives in the country, but there's video. There's video of him shooting a bald eagle? Yeah. all these people out there in the country have hell of video now really it's different living out there they got Elon internet yeah they got H-EB an hour and a half away instead of four hours

away they've got cameras and uh yeah he killed it 14 days 5,000 dollars bald eagles were uh actually removed from the endangered species list in 2007, but they are strictly protected from hunting. Yeah, I feel like he shouldn't be doing that. I'm going to give you a take. It's a bird. They're all the same. Yeah.

Yeah, I'm a T.C. How about that? Can you prove to me that some of them are smarter than the other ones? Oh, just by looking at it. Like by orders of magnitude. Obviously, like, you want to, when it comes to killing an animal, it's like, how smart is it? You think Bald Eagle's super smart relative to crow? I think...

I'm willing to hear it. I think numbers have something to do with it. You can kill a hog because we have too many of them. You can kill a pigeon, who cares? Bald Eagle. I mean, what happens if we lose them? Like, everything... I think all of God's creatures were put here for us to kill.

Yeah, I like that. That's pretty metal. Yeah. Just not playing the WNBA. That's where you draw the line. Yeah, let's just get out there. why did God make guns? To kill bald eagles?

Yeah, just to kill all the animals. There are a lot of hunting fans out there, right? That's what we're doing. Yeah, I think I've... Clay, do you have any... You have dove or deer hunting scheduled right now? This season... Oh, my bad. I'm sorry. I did not know you.

I didn't have a mic. Because I want to go dove hunting this year. Okay. Why? I'm working on it. Don't you lie me. Take TZ. A video. I bet you TZ would go.

Yeah. Video it. Yeah, it's so much fun. I have a left-handed shotgun for you. I can try it. The eye thing, I think I'm actually the dot. Why does that make sense? Why?

Aren't they just symmetrical? Make scissors. Are you right-eye dominant? I think so. Do the test. My right eye, I see much better. Would I be a left-handed shooter? I don't know.

I can't do it right. I can't. In any case. I did this with Brooks to make sure. because I'm pretty sure if you hit left-handed it's better to be right-eye dominant because that's the eye closer to the pitcher. Just want to make sure I'm on the right track.

He's still bad and lefty? Yeah. So is Carter. It's kind of switching. Speaking of animals, down near San Antonio, this is something that I didn't grow up with, but I feel like maybe a lot of people here did. We didn't have like an FFA program

or an ag program, but like did they have that at Irving? Yes or no? You don't have to, I don't want to text. You did have to have a program. Nimitz. One school did. Okay. And Nimitz did.

Now, is that around the country, like in Ohio, Dan? You trained to be a farmer? I think some people did. Not where I grew up. They didn't do it where I grew up, but not too far out. It was, you know, your school, like the ISD would have a barn. I've heard of FFA. Garland has it?

Yeah. Do they? Okay. Well, down in near San Antonio, they have an ag farm at the school district building. And some dogs actually accidentally got in and killed 20 of their animals. See, Dan, the animals actually started it. Yeah, I mean, I think probably what you have is that you have teenagers taking care of a barn. And somebody like left a gate or something like that open.

It's always a thing of wanting people to get real world experience at a young age. And then they make a mistake. All of the horses are dead right after them. But I don't know. I didn't do, we didn't have Home-Eck. We didn't have FFA. We had shop in 7th and 8th grade. That's the only life-type thing I remember at all.

Because that's where you'd watch Faces of Death? Yes, and morbid reality. We had Homeck, and I theorized it was because of the, it was when divorce was becoming a big deal. Ah, that makes sense. Because in the 80s, they would have movies about divorce, and guys are going to have to learn how to cook now. It's terrible.

That was basically the message that I received as a kid. I thought there were divorces because women weren't doing that anymore. Well, whatever, I'm still going to have to learn to cook. Chicken and the egg situation. Yeah, but either way, I'm not eating either. I don't think it's the man's fault. I don't think it's the man's fault. You guys know what Stoufer's pizza is?

Oh, bro, yeah. Okay, yeah. I'm not, but grandma worked at Stoufers. Oh, interesting. You ever get a tour or anything? No, Blake would like it. Some of the packages were ill. Packed.

Whatever. It was, right. Small problems. So she would get those because they sold those at the plant she worked at, and then she would even get a discount off that. Love it. Like, I grew up. That's all I ate was Stoper's stuff.

Big Stoufers guy, Nighthawk. Nighthawk microwave dinner. I feel like TV dinners really have been replaced by your factors. Hell, even if you go to the store now, like, yeah, it's healthier than it used to be. Then our final story. You're saying the hungry man dinner that had a pound of food was not healthy? Dude, those ruled. I used to rip hungry man, big time.

I did a summer job freshman year. It was a diesel mechanic. Nice. And we worked on Dejorno's fleet. So anytime one of the refrigerator trucks would come in. if it had anything in it, like less than a pallet, we just got to take it home. A little skim.

So I just, that's summer of de journo pizzas. A Dallas police officer was fired this week after he was arrested last year on an evading arrest charge. Now, it's an interesting evading arrest charge. He was evading arrest because he was part of a prostitution sting, and they were trying to pull him over. And he wouldn't because he knew it was a sting. and they ended up charging him with that.

He can't be like, oh, I just want to see how things are going. Yeah. Like stopping by your buddy's place of work or something? I feel like this could go either way, but if I were a cop, the ultimate highlight of the job would be busting a buddy. Not even a buddy, just another guy.

You're probably, guy's probably an asshole. What about the thin blue line? Is that what they call it? Yeah. Like you protect each other? Yeah, and I think that's a pretty big point. part of the job, but imagine

this guy's ass. Just imagine being the female cop that's there as like, because he pulled up on two female officers. Oh. It's a female cop.

And he's like, oh no. See the guy's face. They're like, Jim. Uh-uh. Uh-uh. And he's like, nah, come on.

He's a hop in. So you guys have like a cop vibe to you. That's kind of hot. And then the next thing you know, Cuffs. Where did we see the hot cop, Blake?

Me and you. Spencer McKinsey. Oh yeah, our last day there. Dude, we didn't detail what we ran into. Oh, man, it was a, we said it's a possible bet payoff. Yeah. What do you got? A cornhole tournament.

Oh, yeah. The roads were closed down, that road from the main street to the walkway that goes across the highway. Yeah. That was all closed down, and there was probably about 50 to 100 cornhole boards. and it had, I thought, they just didn't have the music, but I thought we were at a Jimmy Buffett concert. Like the same exact people that would be at the Jimmy Buffett concert are doing the cornhole tournament.

And there was one, there was the hottest female cop you've ever seen. Now, we had already been in California for 10 days. It's on a sliding scale. But I think she might have been the hottest. human that's ever walked the earth at this point. Right. And she is looking at this collection of idiots with disdain. And that made her even hotter.

Like she all, hey, you also think this sucks? Right. So do I. And then, so now I'm walking in front of her and we're like, so as the light turns red, me and Blake are like, we run across the street and she's not looking. Damn it. we're trying to get like a jaywalking we're trying to get like so lake just litters in front of her right

uh i lit up a smoke inside the uh the building like i'm trying to and we couldn't get her to arrest us because she was so well the w nba she was in the draft uh no i uh i've got hot cop at my kid's school right now that's really all i want to say about that uh because well yeah yeah i've just been volunteering to take kid to school a lot. Yeah, no, no, I'll go. Yeah, yeah, there you go. Once again, just a bad hand up.

And subscribe. I just haven't heard this in a lot. That's fine. Zooli's pizza pill, catering to any food you want, most likely they can do. Even burgers. Even burgers. Happy birthday.

Thank you. Viewer male birthdays, just a couple today. Remember the one yesterday from Skyler? We all know Skyler. but I think today is the official birthday, so we wanted to give it to Matt Booty. Do you know him? Did you say?

Am I allowed to say? Did you say yesterday you knew him? Yes, I know it very well. You know a memory I closely associate with him was walking out of Alamo Draft House and seeing, I don't know if it was one of our listeners or not, but somebody who had come to the movie that night had their window bashed in.

Do you remember that? We walked out and there was just a windshield. Beashed. Would you have rather had that or what you had happened? Because Blake got towed. Yeah. I think I'd rather get towed. Matt, I think, also slept on my front porch, so he was probably pretty excited.

I picked the other memory. Is he the only person to have ever slept on your front porch or had you... That's a, we could go batting line up in a bullpen. Remember that picture of Fahey sleeping on my front? Fahey was good for me. There being another guy that it was like, okay, That looks way worse. Yeah.

That was helpful. Same problem, but... Yeah, I could see if you were working with Fahey to be like, I don't know. Probably all right. And we have Dear Tsar of the Cesarian Scar. Today is my Costas Atentacumpo birthday. No one knows. I was going to be woken up in that special way, but it didn't feel right.

is we mourn the passing of Greg Biffle. And now Daly Pardin? Do you remember getting an email? I got an email from a guy who said, The 99. Everything is funny that you guys do, but the Biffle thing, I mean, I... Lay off the Biff, man.

Yeah. You did a lot for local children's... The most surprising email I've ever got. Because you'll get the 99% of the stuff you guys do, but then every time Jake says something about the Aggies, I just want to turn you guys all. Or any time Dan says something about... about a little person or something.

But you're going to go to bat like that over NASCAR driver Greg Biff. I agree with that guy. I think I was out of bounds and I should not have made fun of Greg Biffle. I support you on that. My leaders are Dan's grounding shoes, term limits on marriage agreements, Quentin Tarantino's N-word hall pass, the lump on AI Erica's Mondo-Banging T's. Those were great.

From the Swinger Party. Quick first down for Blake. To cut down on candy for Easter, my wife decided to fill the eggs with stupid little toys we already had. I remember my son opening one to find a bouncy ball inside saying, whoa, this is just like the one I have at home. Movie trope. Why do New Yorkers seem to hang out on rooftops all the time? Is it really that easy to access?

Keep gently caressing hog with sufficient lubrication and wrist-twist-twist action from JD. What, Blake? Just nothing. All right. Let's move on to this. You're almost done. And let's get to TC. Come on, join us for this.

Fairlees.org presents on this day in history. I'm a big fan of giving my kid stuff they already have. I think Denham was taking a video of us at the same time Dan did that. That's how we're going to be remembered. Who? Denham. Like the jeans, I think is her Instagram. There's a human name Denham?

Yeah, she's a big fan of our show. You've met her 15, 20 times? Oh, yeah? Okay, hold on. T.C.'s going to be around more now. He's doing more stuff. Learn the code. How many times?

You're going to say that every time? Because you're going to be saying it every time. Every five minutes you'll be saying, Is it a joke that I have to tell him this again, or does he not remember this person? And if you're going to say... We got new people tuning in all the time. Shut the fuck off. I might like to say that doesn't work.

And you know because you just looked at me and couldn't even finish the sentence anymore. I absolutely have new... There are people... This is a different thing. I would like to welcome all the 23-year-olds who saw Henry's TikTok yesterday and... See, now he's getting us on that. And wants to know who denim is. Sorry that Jake won't identify that person for you.

I remember her because her name is denim She was at a previous Connie Rosedo remote where she had written in an email to you then read out without knowing I believe that she was there and then she appeared from the crowd to back up her critical email so I think it was roasting you guys

who's a good moment your show's really good I just I try not to I'm kind of a pence like in that I don't even acknowledge other women exist. Just my wife. Just my beautiful wife who I love. You just see a subscriber.

That's right. Annual one. While you guys were doing the show, there was a family where the wife had brought a stand for her phone so they could do the Cowboys Y photo as a family. Oh, we'll see everyone's doing it. I don't see a problem with that. Yeah. I think that's great as well.

Boy, people are rolling in now. We had an entire class coming to see the... What time is? Open practice. Boy, there is a lot of people here. I thought it was fine. What are you watching practice? What are you doing?

Who knows? God. All right. Today is Tuesday, August 25th. Oh, my God. They have an open practice and a post-practice tailgate and drone show. Hell yeah.

God, they know how to do it. Wow. Our drone show is one. So? That's pretty good? I love looking at one drone. It's awesome. One drone.

It's a fun place to do it. On this day in 1980, in Toronto, Rangers pitcher Ferguson Jenkins is arrested after customs officials discover $500 worth of cocaine, marijuana, and hashish. Is that how you say that? In his suitcase. The arrest stuns the entire country

where Ferguson Jenkins is considered a national hero. He's from Canada. I had no idea. Yep. He was Steve Nash before Steve Nash. Okay. On this day, oh, okay, today's a fun today in history day. Getting ready for this.

Besides arguing with Claude, I had some fun times with Claude this morning, too. I shouldn't just mention the bad times. That's good. Torrent's relationship. Torrent affair, rather. We had to find out information about this. a flight in 2010 where all but one

of the 21 passengers and crew died. Now, that's a pretty small flight. It's big enough. But it was in the Congo. Wow. Talk about places that I can't tell you where they are. I just feel like early early... Where do you think the Congo is?

Africa? Yeah, that's not I was thinking. Is it one of the... You're even... I feel like content it's pretty obvious. Really? Yeah. It's Africa, right? Yeah, yeah.

Okay, there you go. Now, within Africa, up there, don't know. I think it's somewhere in the middle. Is it somewhere near Chad? It's deep forest because I'm sure that it sucks. But I love that movie when I was a kid, Congo. Yeah, that's why. That's what it is.

Yeah, that's why I've immediately... That's a deep forest. Like, they're in the jungle, that whole movie. Is that why they... Would the guerrillas, like, dance in a line? they'll hold each other's hips. No, they were eating you. Isn't that called a Congo line?

Congo. That rips super hard. Anyway, so someone... Every Disney movie, by the way, has that scene that's, like, very scary, and there's a lot of woods and forest, and they open the forest, and there's the bears just dancing. That scene exists. I think, yeah, I think...

Oh, we landed in the Democratic Republic of Congo. That's a Madagascar. We're almost done, ma'am. I promise. Where's my Congo thing? Here it is. So someone had smuggled a crocodile aboard in a duffel bag. That's how it crashed? Oh, no.

Bill CIA-ish. This is 2010, this day in 2010. It snakes on. on a plane. It's a smallish plane. A passenger hid a live crocodile inside a sports bag because he wanted to sell it. Well, the reptile gets loose

as the plane is preparing to land. They're like landing, close your laptops. So it gets loose, and everybody starts yelling, like, ah! Totally. And then so everybody runs to like one, part of the plane, and it caused a weight imbalance. Yeah.

Plan goes down. Everybody dies except one passenger and the crocodile. Excellent. Yay. I'm proud of that. Hold on. That's how we got crocodile. The animal survived the crash, but rescuers killed it with a machete at the scene.

Hey, he was reaching for his waistband. Wow. Racist. That weight distribution thing, the greatest maritime disaster in American history, was that. There was a boat on the Chicago River that it started to tip one way and then people overreacted, and the entire boat flipped over, and a hundred people died, and George Hallis was just standing there watching the whole thing. He was like a 17-year-old.

He worked to the company that had been renting the boat. That's NFL history for you. I like it. So you're saying there's like a lot of death in that story. Then the one survivor then just also dies in the end too. And that's a good story. But the Odyssey is a good story. Or I'm kind of lost here.

Well, the one survivor survived, the human. Yeah, yeah. They didn't take a machete to him. There's an Odysseus. And then you exiled himself and then. Yeah, I don't know where the, uh, yeah. I don't know the Odysseus story. You're acting like I know it.

And then you forgot, I'm me. No, Jake acts like everyone knows it. I like that you're cooking. I do think it's a story that most people know, but if I'm wrong, I'm wrong. Blake roasting the Odyssey is great. I love it. It's perfect. I do too, but now all of a sudden Blake is like, oh, the comment said, I shouldn't have said that.

It's because he shaved his mustache. I know. He's like a docile little. Don't make fun of Christopher Nolan. They weren't teaching the Odyssey in Christian school. No. Yeah. It would make sense.

Although my college was the most Catholic college in America and all they wanted to talk about the entire four years was The Odyssey. It's a letters college though. Absolutely. It's about the classics, Western civilization. That's how they indoctrinate you. On this day in 2017, Hurricane Harvey hits Texas. There's too good.

Let's see, 68 people dead. They estimate $125 billion worth of damage. Don't you love those? No way. Yeah, I don't buy it. How much do you think? That's what I do. No, I think it's 118 billion.

That's what I do with my codex thing, like Claude or whatever. When I see a number like that, I'm like, break it down for me. Yeah, let's break down $125 billion. Yeah, there's a lot of guessing about what could have been. That's interesting. Like if this place, would they take into account, well, the landscaping outside, that certainly costs. Oh, they were taking into account? the landscaping for the next however many years.

So who cares? Yeah. All right. Harvey, that's interesting, though, because Gordon used to joke and say the Harvey's, but my aforementioned soccer coach buddy who left us, my Chilean friend, his son was, they moved here because of Harvey, and he named his son Harvey. And the, like when they moved here. The Astros tried to sneak an extra home series out of it.

I thought that was pretty underhanded. The Rangers had to be like, uh-uh, I don't care how bad it is down there. What if we just, instead of playing the last series to decide the division in Dallas, what if we did that in Houston because of the hurricane? Yeah, it didn't rain up here, bud. Then they were so pissy about it whenever they said no. And on this day in 2020, Jake, Jerry Falwell Jr. resigned as the head of Liberty University. Why?

After a photo was revealed and also his wife's extra. marital affair revealed the pool boy um and they said that jerry fallwell junior would wouldn't he be a part of it as far as just voyer type thing he would watch just sit there in the corner and it was a literal like which is cool that you're not just on your phone or computer you know you're doing something real engaged yeah you everywhere you look guys people are just on their phones, you know. Be present while your wife is getting... So, Dan, you listen to music, right?

You enjoy it? And then sometimes... 24-7. Sometimes go to a concert, and that's even better. I've started to wonder, like, I wouldn't want to do it with my wife. But how come they don't have live-action porn more often? Oh, man. Like, it used to be a thing.

I mean, they do have it in parts of the world. So you can go to a play instead of a movie. Yeah. Same thing. Yeah, and it feels a little more, there's a crackle in the room. God bless, man. That's interesting. Yeah, I never thought of that.

That's a good gummy thought. You had Pee Wee Herman? Oh, why you got to throw... It's a big note. I don't know where. It's a big note about his career. That wasn't live action porn, no. It's a note about his career, but he was wrong.

What are you supposed... There are people that go to those and don't do that? Like, yeah. This is the entire... establishment. I didn't know you could be arrested for doing what you. It's like getting arrested for watching the animals at the zoo.

That's a good point. I think it's a RICO type thing where they were actually just arresting him for making bad movies. Well, that charge wouldn't stick either since they're so good. You know how Claude won't help you make AI

porn of Bobby Altoff or somebody that's famous? Because that's using their likeness and stuff. What if I just want AI porn of my wife? And she signs off on it. Can I do that? Because I love her so much, and I just want to be with her all the time. I mean, probably not in Claude, but you can definitely do that.

I think that's an excellent sketch idea, a wife guy that's so... Yeah. He's so into his wife. All right. Famous weddings on this date. Famous weddings to me. There's some age gaps here. 1929, 28, architect Frank Lloyd Wright, who painted the whale wall.

Yeah, right? Basically, yeah. He is 61. Man. He marries Olga Ivanova. You have three things in play here. Yeah, the Eastern European art and 1929. That's a triple decker right there.

She's 24. If that. She's 30. Oh. Yes. 31 year age difference. No problem with that. 31 year age difference.

In 1955, actor Bella Lugosi. Wasn't he somebody like Frankenstein or Dracula or somebody? He was like in a horror movie. He is 72. He marries Hope Linear. What's the age gap?

36. 50. 36 is correct. She is 36. Right. When he was 36. He went to the hospital and was like, I'll have that one. Call me in 36 years.

And then that baby grew up and, yeah, there he is. I love that he's such a gentleman, like 18 now. Right. That's ridiculous. And then you have in the year 2000, Patrick Stewart actor. He's 60 from Star Trek. Oh, man, he has one. Marries Wendy Neuse.

Age gap? Five years. I'm saying this is respectable, and that's why it's here. 21 years is the difference, which comparatively is quite respectable, right? She's 39, he's 60. I would date a 60-year-old. That's right. Let me get to the third part there.

I would nail a 60-year-old. My stance the entire time is if you're above the age of 30, no one's, like, tricking you. No one's pulling one over. You're like, you're going in with eyes open, you know. I don't think that any of these are controversial if they're over the age of 30. Until Nico Harrison became the GM of my basketball team. I know. I was literally thinking about that driving here.

Like, how did... Let it go. How did Adam Silver, like, not just deny that? Like, anyway. What's he even doing? I think about it every day. I know. I think about Luca every day.

Something happened last night in my life that was number 77 and it... It was sad. What could that have been? The thing that happened in Jake's life last night? Number 77. And on this day in 2007, Mike Madano, age of 37, marries Willa Ford. She's 26. The problem with that one, though, or was it that one or his other?

He's once married someone that he, like, was there in the delivery room, right? Yeah, it's... But I think that was the next one. It's not delivery, but I believe he knew his current wife when she was quite young. I believe it was a brief meeting. She's a golfer too. August 25th, this day in Dumb Zone history. I have a lot.

In 2022, we did the story that South Carolina, the university, was going to have a vote for their new mascot name. Right. The top three in the fan vote. Cock Commander. Nice. Cluck Norris. Love that.

Marco Poyo. that's excellent yeah um despite the viral internet popularity none of those won the university just adopted their own ah well then why even do it what they pick i don't know if they really didn't want to go with marco pollo cluck norse is great too ethnic um and then in 2021 uh we the milk crate challenge causes its first death oh man You loved this. Death? What did I love about it?

I didn't remember. Broken bones. What was my take? I had something. I just feel like you're talking about a milk crate challenge a lot, working it in conversation. I'm glad that didn't, like, become a thing. Like, I thought after that every month there'd be something kids were killing themselves with. Well, they had to start eating Tidepods.

Right. While you were ranting about the Milk Crate Challenge, Dan was ranting because the MLB changed the DL to the I-L. Absolutely insane. That is along the lines of acting like... They just change it to W.H.L. Acting like they fixed racially discriminatory housing by changing the name to Master Bedroom or from Master Bedroom. Done and Dusted.

We're fine now. It's insane. Now shut up. I have two pieces of audio. These are both from the show in 2021. Can you imagine a disabled person like finding out about that they called the disabled list and just how crestfallen they'd be? Yeah, right?

Well, that's why they changed it. Try to stand up. The what? Still. We had Matthew Barry on the show. Congratulations. Speaking of woke 1.0. And this is what he did.

And then McCaffrey killed me last year with not picking up the handcuff. So. Didn't get Mike Davis. I didn't. Who was the backup in Carolina? Correct. What did you say? A handcuff?

What's a handcuff? What's a handcuff? I'm sorry? What? No, no. You guys both said handcuff and nodded. Like everybody knew what you were taught. Is that like drafting Tony Pollard if you have Z

because you're running back? Yeah, I mean, to be clear, that's language that I try not to use. But, like, I would say that it is a phrase that has been used in fantasy people for a long time. The idea behind that particular phrase. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Dork. Isn't that offensive to the BDSM community that he refuses to use their terms? Right.

Couldn't it be bondage related? You don't have a, you know, police brutality doesn't have a minority. I backed the blue. That's why I love handcuffed steak. You should remove the taboo over this perfectly normal and aboveboard hobby. God, I'm very happy we lived through that time. This was in the thick of the Cowboys Hard Knocks, and this episode had just come out where Jerry's in a helicopter.

And you get to see them at their competitive best because they're trying to make this cut, trying to make this ding. Hey, sir? He said, come back and get Stephen. Go back and get Stephen. Can we? Okay, sure we can. Okay.

Absolutely we can. They forgot Stephen. Do you not have to rest of it? I do know. I want to laugh at this first. Okay, good. But here his, he's not upset. He's in a helicopter.

He's a great time. No, but he loves Stephen. We've talked about this recently. Yeah. It's like the Soroy twins. Yeah. Like it's an unhealthy, like, it's weird. They've been in, they've violated four walls, two balls together before.

This month. Yes. And if you remember, if you were in no boo, no boo. No, that's a good point because the visual on this, Stephen does kind of show up, like the shoveled kind of. Yeah. Did it again, and Jerry's like, oh, you dummy. But he's not like, get the off an IV, right? Yeah, right.

But he's not like, get on the, you're off the team field or whatever. Like, oh, damn, got to go back for Steve. No, he's like, he's laughing. He thinks it's great. But he's still going to get the line in, though. Hey, sir. He said to come back and get Steven. Go back, get Stephen.

Can we? Okay, sure we can. Okay. Absolutely we can. Why not just start today, fucking it up. If this is an indication of how the day's going to go out here and we can't even get everybody on the helicopter to get out and going back to pick Stephen up. Starting off here. Starting the day off.

Pre-staffed penalties. He's like, what are we doing? What's going on? I'm on the bird. Who's got the snacks? He loves him. He's not going to get mad at him, but he's going to let him know a little... Yeah.

A lot of people at that level of wealth don't have a good relationship in their life like Jerry and Stephen have. I think it's nice they have each other. Beautiful. Truly. Then my final note, this is Jake taking down Mike and Duncanville Day. Ten years. Way to go. Wow.

Oh, that's right. So that means, is it Romo got injured? Yep. Yeah. Tonight against the Seahawks. I had this in my Today in his Let's see

August 25th 2016 Jake wins fight Cole Hamill's throw shutout Romo injured Oh and then on this date in 2023

Cowboys acquired Trey Lance What a day What a big day Yeah I offered to fight For the 10-year anniversary But they They did not respond

I believe the person you offered Might be out of the age age range. Ah, that might be it. That's why, otherwise. Yeah, they'd be all about it. That was a very fun night. As big an ass kicking has ever been handed out at that event.

Do you guys want to hear Dave Campo, who was on the Blue Star Network that night? Yes. So just there you had Jerry doing, why not start the day effing it up? This is, I want to probably say Bill Jones, someone else, Dave Campo is up there, and Romo just gets rocked early. Even in the preseason, it gets loud here in Seattle. Second and seven. We'll go down.

Oh, he's holding this back. Oh, my. Well, that's not a good start right there, guys. Nailed it. That is the end of Romo's career. Wow. And all Campo had was, well, boys, that's not exactly how we wanted to come out of the gates here, is it? I thought someone called a cramp.

Oh, that's Romo later on deck. Oh, got to hope it's just a cramp. This is the end of Rob. I don't know who probably Jamil showers or Kellyn Moore came in right after this. Yeah, yeah. Oh, my. Well, that's not a good start right there, guys. Nope.

Well, our franchise quarterback is dead. So. That's why we got this guy in the booth. Yeah. But now it's third and 14. Right. So what are you seeing, Dave? Umbrella coverage.

or what it. And we never saw him play again, folks. He's got a perfect voice. Are you guys sick of the, why is the Little League World Series? Like, why are all the games on? If just the final is on, that's okay, right? Why are we watching 50?

Would you rather watch it anywhere? Because I've told you about this stuff that's going on. What about a replay of the Kirk Gibson home run game? But it's not going anywhere. Because now the New York Magazine or somebody's got an article, a cover story this month about the youth. sports epidemic. I got buddies.

This is all they do. So if 20 years ago they were putting it on TV, now there's no way they're taking it off. Because I actually know people who are in this now, not in the tournament, but are in this world. This is only growing. Who's watching? And they're putting the lady one on too, yeah.

My brother's kid is 100% watching this. There's a girl's baseball tournament? No, there's a girl playing in the boys, and she's probably the best player out there. Like the girl pitcher a couple years ago, yeah. She is a 32. or something. She's a post-minopausal, but.

Have they checked to make sure she was born a girl? That's one of the downsides of doing it that way, certainly. All right, other birthdays today, we have O'Do B. McDowell is 64. I appreciate you letting us know, though. Clearly, that's one where you've just been thinking, what the, why is this on all the time right now? I hate it. And he looked up and saw it and was like, you know what?

Well, that, would you rather watch that? I'm pissed off. Would you rather watch tennis? No. Yeah. I want professional tennis on instead of 12-year-old kids playing baseball. I would watch high schoolers play seven on seven.

Like, you know, I don't like the WNBA because I also wouldn't like watching the top middle school boys basketball teams play. Like, that's the same level of talent. You want the top the choice nugs only. Yeah, so I don't want to watch 12-year-olds play baseball even if it's the best 12-year-olds. What if I could sell you on a...

And I don't believe. believe that they do actually whittle that done to the tournament that I'm involved in called the golf adaptive open now you have me this is kind of like the adaptive open right every 12 year old is a disabled adult think of it that way that's true look at him uh anyway odaby macdala 64 Gary Matthews Jr is 52 cha Ching cha Ching cha Ching both of those guys played center field for the Rangers at different times. Dave Tippett is 65. By the way.

Former Stars coach. Game one goes our way last night, bud. What do you got for us tonight? See Kumar Rocker almost. You're not even ready for what we have tonight. Dan, he should have given up two or three runs in the first inning. Because they still make him pitch the first inning. Brendan Nimmo.

Put a couple on. Brendan Nemo had a. Oh, he got out of a jam and. Cruz. He did. They rolled to a destruction of the wild. He didn't get out of crap. No, he very much weren't there.

He got rock for three runs that Brandon Nimmo pulled back into the ballpark. Like, there you go. Legitimately did know Nimmo had that in. He probably knew where to pitch it to get that. I feel like Nimmo's running to the wall thinking if this goes over or this guy's done. We lost. We lost. 100% full we lost moment.

Otito. Obanue? How do you said? Obongia, I think, is 26. That is the current Dallas Cowboy. He's in the rotation. Albert Bell is 60. Happy birthday.

So MVP award ripped from him. God, this is the year of the 95 Indians, isn't it? He finished. We are doing this every five days. In second place to Movon. Here's what I learned the other day. In my head, they were like 10 games clear of the field. They weren't even first in the AL Central.

I know that. You know who's first in the Hale Central? White Sox. Of course. We're about to talk about some, a different topic. Okay. All together. This is the MVP race, of which Frank Thomas finished eighth in this MVP race.

Robbed. And you know what? He was robbed to be at that level. Frank Thomas with an 8.3 war that year. Good God. Finished eighth? Yeah. Oh, wait.

Do I have that wrong? 5.3 war. Yeah, I was going to say 8 will win it most years. But John Valentin, what the hell is that? Had an 8.3 war. Frank Thomas was 8th. Albert Bell was second. Mo Vaughan first.

Albert Bell wore 7.0. Movon, 4.3. That's terrible. They used to have some real robberies by war. But Boston, you got your Boston. Albert Bell slugging. Let me just, Albert Bell is first in all of these numbers, okay? Movon is second.

690 to 575 slugging 121 to 98 runs 173 to 165 hits 50 to 39 in home runs hey just real quick is there a category there next to Bell and Vaughn for corked bats what was it that year in the stuff that they used to

dumbly decided by like TWTW who's got RBIs and batting average Is that how this robbery occurred? RBI tied. Batting average. Well, then give it to the guy in Boston for sure. Batting average, Mo Vaughan hit 300 that year. Albert Bell hit 317.

I'm not saying that people loved Mo Vaughn, but I know because I was alive that people hated Albert Bell. It was very unlikely. And that is how you should vote for your MVP then. Baseball doesn't. Based on personality. He was called with a cork bat. in 94. In 97, he settled a class action lawsuit after he was accused of chasing kids with his car and bumping one of them after they egged his house.

Bumping. Do you want to... Just a little tap? A little warning tap. No, I don't want to egg Albert Bell. No, I'm saying it, yeah. That would be a tremendous mistake. If you egged Albert Bell, you got off light. Right. Make the Soroy's egg Albert Bell. Where was I? Oh, okay. Here's one. Max Muncie is 36. Keller. You know who he is?

Yeah, Dodger. I saw him hit a home run. Hold on. Max Muncie is 24. A? There are two guys named Max Muncie. Born on the same day? Born on the same day.

Wow. They were both drafted by the A's. This breaks my brain every year. Makes me think AI wrong. But it's right. One is from Texas. The other is from California. California. Wait, one is from Texas, but he started his pro career in California.

One is from California started his pro career in Texas. Wow. I literally think. Abe Lincoln's secretary was named Kennedy. If Norm were on the air, this could kill him. What's going on now behind this, folks? I'm sorry to be distracted, but it appears that the troops are descending on the open practice. It's a guy in military gear, but it's a little confusing because,

Normally if you're wearing military gear, you're really all about just the military. He's got a Neeland flag on him, which is showing love. But, yeah, the military guys are usually pretty specific about not putting stuff with the military stuff. Especially a Marshawn-Nieland-specific flag. Look at the preponderance of people in the line to get into the star. Yeah. Practices at 5.30. With umbrellas.

Yeah, you see the umbrella outside a lot more in Texas now, and I don't mind it. People in Asia have been doing that forever. Oh, my gosh. Jake's gotten so soft You'd have been ripping this a couple years ago I mean the umbrella is like the trans thing It ain't for me but go for it Right

I don't need an umbrella look at me Come on You can't get wet No I don't get sunburn Raleigh Fingers is 80 Was he good Or did he do I just know him Because he had an electric

Unique stash He was definitely good You know him because of the stash He was good but he's not as good I think In Major League history, we've now devalued the closer, right? But just closures were new back then, right? Okay.

He still has the mustache. He was at the Field of Dreams game. Yeah, I mean, Dolly Parton wasn't getting them removed. Marvin Harrison is 54? Do you think Heritage Auctions can get her implants? Posthumously. Probably not. Robert Ory is 56.

Big shot. Elvis Costello, 72. Jake, Tim Burton is 68. Awful. Just a travesty on American culture. Hey, let's make everything Halloween. His Batman's are so good. Teewee's big adventure, obviously, home run.

Yep. Batman, but Halloween. Billy Ray's... Not Batman actually is awesome, but... Formerly Billy Ray Cyrus is 65. Apparently his name is now just Cyrus. Shut up. No, that's a different guy.

Uh-uh. Cyrus, the virus. he says here he just goes by cyrus now because isn't there a fox news guy named oh that's tyrus totally different okay he's like a wrestler or something yeah he was DJ Terminator X is 60 god it's right there from public enemy okay yeah uh T C Jeff Tweedy is 59 what a big day I once heard TC say that he thought this book about Jeff Tweedy was great. So I bought it.

And then I'm like, it's been on my shelf, and there's nothing in the world that will ever make me read that book. I was surprised. I don't know who he is. I was surprised you bought it. I don't know what Wilco is. It's a great band.

But you had such a forceful, like, this is such a good book. I just went out and bought it because I heard you say that. If you cracked it up and you'd enjoy it. It's a hell of a book. My wife asked me something the other night. like, hey, when's the last time you

used to listen to a lot of Woco? She's like, when's the last time you listened to this album? I was like, I don't know, I haven't wanted to kill myself in a couple years now. Oh, that's good. So, yeah, applause. It's music that's really good for that. Really?

He's a very like, you know, it's very like nerd music. But he also did have like a crippling opiate addiction. And the descriptions of that are just very funny. Like he just found like a, you know, nerdy-looking guy in Chicago. that was working at a pharmacy that he showed up and like clearly looked like an opiate user

and the guy was like, hey man, big fan, anything you want, just come on by. And that kicked off a up and down year of his life. Good music, though. Well, if anyone wants that book, hit me up and out. I'll just give it to you. Rachel Ray is 58. Is she all torn up right now, CMS? What does that mean?

I just heard, I thought I've seen some stuff online about how she's just let herself go a bit. I think she's a clickbait thing now. You'll never believe what she looks like now. That's the thing. But in a bad way. Kell Mitchell is 48. The better one. From Keenan and Kell.

I think they've like buried badgers. Do you think he's better than Keenan? Definitely. Gene Simmons is 77. Great kiss. Great fresh air interview. I'm sorry, that reminds me as something.

Gene Simmons or Kell? Gene Simmons. Terry Gross cuts it off. It's like the only one she's ever like hit the eject button. He says, he makes like a kondolingus joke that you would have loved.

And then she's like, that's disgusting, get off the show. I did the game with Burline over the weekend and he with a straight, like, was dead serious,

came up to me and said, hey, have you seen that thing with the substitute teacher can't say the student's names? Like, Keem Peel? He goes, yeah,

like they said Balakee in it. Yeah, he just saw it. Incredible. That's a decade ago. Yeah, but just the fact that he saw it at all. Like, what else is possible now? Didn't the Cowboys do their schedule release like that? Ah, yeah.

No, the Mavs. No, the Mavs did? Someone recently did it. I swear it sucked. Yeah. Blake Lively is 39. She. It's a girl's name.

Blake's a girl's name. You both? Okay, keep telling yourself that. is married to Ryan Reynolds. I kind of Easter basketed that story after I initially got into it. It was fun at first. This Justin Baldoni character. My wife was going to go see the movie.

He's an asshole. She's an asshole. I got out on it, to be honest. But I do know that at some point in there, we learned that the U.S. government absolutely pays, like, WHO-H-L-type lib podcasters, like Justin Baldoni, to go and talk about how women are great to combat like Vegas Mike and the manosphere.

That is factual. I don't even know what you're referring to. We talked about it on the show at the time, but like Justin Baldoni was accused of being like really bad to women, Blake lively in particular. Oh. But a couple years before that, he was like on the front lines of like,

hey man. He had a podcast whose focus was like redefining masculinity to be. And it turns out that podcast was being funded by the state. department under the Biden administration because they're like, we got it. And here's the thing. We'll take money from anybody. Yeah, I want to be funded. We'll do any of it. Just give me

whatever you want. It doesn't either way. Yeah. But so it turns out the guy who was like, hey, we got to redefine masculinity was also like a giant asshole. That's just the way it works, right? Blake lively great in the town. And then, do you feel like

we're over Ryan Reynolds did? It's receding. Kind of like bacon and beards? I feel like it's like don't let good be the enemy of perfect Like he's very annoying to me But him being mega famous makes more sense to me than like Mr. Beast baby gronk Or Mr. Beast, yeah

Baby gronk He's got talent Listen but I grew up watching Why did you platform baby grong? I grew up watching two guys a girl in a pizza place I'm an old school And then finally actor Alexander Scarsguard is 50 That is the item

Man. Generation kill? Yeah. In addition to just being great and everything he's ever done. He was in succession as well. So good in succession. Yeah. He's the best.

That's a NEPA family, right? They're all in the game. Yeah. Born on this day now dead, Sean Connery. There you go. Yeah. And Regis Philbin. Oh.

Go Irish. Dude, this is probably on a list like the Magic Hour and the OJ Doc. we got to get the one or two episodes. Remember FS1 or what did they try? Maybe when they were first coming back as FS1, they gave Regis Philbin a sports talk show. And it is hilarious. It's so bad.

Every bit bombs. He has a monologue. He's adding more teams to the playoffs. It's the like bizarro twin version of Norm McDonald's sports show. It's the two polls of one episode sports shows. A very young. 80 Nolan. Huh.

She's like 25 or 26 at the time. It is hilarious, dude. Also, if you like funny Regis stuff, the show from the morning of 9-11, exceptional. Fun. Interesting. We did recently review that,

and it is interesting. It's a lot of fun. I once had Regis in studio in date. That's a treat. I went looking for it this morning, but apparently there was a lot of bleed over when you store cassette tape, they can bleed over onto each lay it's anyway you didn't want to see if

Claude could fix that he was the biggest fan ever and that you well let us in a damn well you know I can't remember but you actually do I I've tried to write something back as much as like that's me and Regis but you can't really hear it I think 11 labs could fix that am I crazy it's possible really Anyway, dead on this day, still dead. Friedrich Nietzsche. Give me your favorite Nietzsche. You're always quoting Nietzsche.

I'm not. I'm decidedly trying to move away from that line of thinking. I think he said you've got to be strong. You've got to be real strong. And if, if. Like the Hulk. Yeah. He said be strong like the Hulk.

Yeah, he's a big Hulk. It was either that one or the one where he started doing that weird thing with his hands and eating the W. That was my other favorite. Also dead on this day, still dead. Neil Armstrong, the first man to step on the moon. What if we ran like all of Nietzsche into AI

to make like an AI Nici and then just had James talk to it and made that a TV show? I'd watch that. Ted Kennedy, born on the stay now dead? Led a perfectly clean life. No mistakes. No.

There was that pond. Well, you know. Speaking of succession. Yep. She wanted to get into that car. How can you put that on his record? And died on this day in 2018, John McCain, who some would say a hero. I personally.

And that's what happened on this day. Dude, that seems so quaint, but I remember watching that live. That happened on the weekend. Or I was watching the news when he said it. I remember at that time being like, fuck, Trump is cooked. Yeah. You can't talk about John McCain. What a gaff.

They're going to destroy him for this. That was like 10 years ago. I mean, how many times the Rambo get captured in the movie? Well, thank you to Connie Rousseau. Well, thank you to Connie Rousseau. Awesome crowd today. Good times at the star. Yeah.

We will next be at the half-price books. M.F. Hamlin will be there. They're signing his book as well. The Northwest Highway Half Price Books. Will you be there Thursday, T.C.? 100%. And if you don't see me around the broadcast locations, just look in the used photo book section.

That's where you spend your time. We'll be joined by special guests out there, a few of them. So good times. Great times. Any closing remarks there, Blake? I'm just enamored by this Little League World Series game. Oh, cool. Do they have ABS in this?

I thought I saw them doing a replay. They're doing replay. For real? Yeah. I know you don't like the orange base at first. They have an orange base at first? I stopped watching this. Is that where you pick up your purse?

I stopped watching when they stop letting them use steroids. It's just the whole team with Eddie Goodell. We've got to go. See you guys for drinks later. Thank you for watching my video. Subscribe and type for my name if you want to watch more of my video. Carole Sozoli's pizza pill Catering to any food you want,

most likely they can do. Even burgers. Even burgers. The IMAX movie about a fake story. I didn't understand the score. Special effects. It wasn't even gory. But oh no, don't talk bad about Sir Christopher Nolan.

At least not the same way we used to bag on. James Dolan, but at least Dolan has a ring. I saw Oppenheimer and thought the very same thing. Too long, too boring, who cares so lame? Would have been better if it starred Kevin James. Hey, Academy, yeah? Will you do me a favor and tell Christopher Nolan he's not that great? Just remind him next time you see him that he's really not that great.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, Christopher Nolan is a revolutionary director. and very important to the film industry. Oh, well. Who cares cause he sucks and the Odyssey sucked? What a waste of three hours and thirty bucks on it over a arrow? He shoots from the bow that he stringed by his boner. A fleck.

Maybe this sounds like disrespect, but they didn't even show Odysseus and Calypso having sex. Instead she's feeding him lotus leaves and asking him about his memory in the past tense. Until he remembers he's married and then floats away on a fucking fence I'd rather watch John Wick 6 produced by Mike Pence and starring Christopher Mint The Odyssey sucks and so run the ball game so I