The Dumb Zone FREE - How are we supposed to approach Luka's return and Jared Sandler on The Rangers' great start | DZ 04-07-25

Episode Date: April 7, 2025

Get every episode of The Dumb Zone by subscribing at DumbZone.com or Patreon.com/TheDumbZoneWe do a little Weekend Check that features our Austin/San Antonio trip and offer up some Bad Beats. Plus: Jared Sandler! (00:00) - Open: Weekend Check (41:36) - Sports: The Final Four, MAVS talk + Luka returning to Dallas (01:08:38) - Viewer Mail (01:23:51) - Jared Sandler (01:53:25) - News (02:12:03) - Today in History ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Hello, I'm professional broadcaster Dan McDowell letting you know that you are about to hear one of our free podcasts. But if you'd like to subscribe at DumbZone.com, you'll get four shows per week plus the weekend wrap-up and any bonus sodes like our Business Wednesday interviews. So if you forgot how to use the 15-second rewind, that's DumbZone.com to subscribe. That's dumbzone.com to subscribe. Now on to today's program. Are you some sad schmuck who spent all weekend at a dealership? Okay, no. Yes for the first part. Well, if you were yes to both parts, I have a better way for you and that is with Fair Lease. Fair Lease is Texas. Fair Lease is owned by Credit Union of Texas. They are putting

your best interest first. Sell your car, get paid fast, get more for your trade. We know the people at Fair Lease. We know Danny, we know Matthew, we know they're going to help you out and make this as easy for you as possible. They'll bring the car right to you. You can do all this over your phone. It's right there in the name, folks. It's fair, flexible, focused on you. So go to their website, fairlease.org, and then select, request a quote, and then dumb zone

on the how did you hear about us page that pops up on that dropdown menu. Fairlease, they're doing it a little bit differently. They are client first. It's not some big, huge operation, but big enough to take care of you. So hit up Danny, hit up Matthew at fairlease.org. Good spot dude. Hey I thought it could have been a little better, but I'm gonna say C plus B minus. The preceding and the following content are brought to you by No PuppetProductions and The Dumb Zone.

And our Jake birthday of the day. Chris Pontius or Jeff Tremaine. She... China. Is 55 years old today. Okay. Mackenzie Scott. Ho ho ho ho!

What's her current status? Did she marry a plumber or something? You mean a science teacher? Yes, but they've already been divorced. Would you? The answer is yes It's Monday you're humble And I'm humbled to be with you here today, and I'm Dan Mcdowell I'm Jake Kim And I'm on vacation Who do we have joining us here? Oh We got a little, uh... Not Blake. We're doing bits.

Sex symbol himself. We're... We got a fake voice. ACopelandproduction.com Hey, guys. That is Michael Copeland, our real hot video guy. Sorry, sorry, Clayton. You gotta agree, right?

Clayton Kimbrough is here. Yeah, he's hot. I was thinking about Michael when I saw him in the hallway. Wearing shorts, he pulls it off. It's two degrees out. Yeah. It's funny because it's like shortstop quarterback guy. There's something that bothers me about the fact

that he's like a good looking, in shape dude. And he's like, I'm behind the camera type. Like, oh, really? Oh, cool. He looks like a good-looking, in-shape dude, and he's like, I'm behind the camera type. Like, oh, really? Yeah. Oh, cool. He looks like a news anchor. Yeah. Thank you, guys.

We'll see if he can get the show posted. So scared. Then we'll judge. That's right. I'm just glad to see you made it back safe. He'll read Reddit, so go ahead and tell him everything that is wrong about his show posting tonight. Ugh. Little late.

Little what? Are you talking to me now? If I jump back and forth between topics? You're glad I made it back? Yeah. Why? I don't know, I didn't see you. I was with- I didn't write back with you.

I mean, I was with Matt I didn't run back with you. I mean I was with Matt. Matt Dallas, Matt Grim. The times you boys roll into town. What do you think Clayton? One-ish? Yeah, a little after one. You know, took a stop. Got a little food, got a little gas, got a little grass, grass, gas, ass.

It was a great time. Thank you Lone Star Beer for sending us down to San Antonio. Who would have thought you'd want to be in San Antonio, but there we were. A lot of people came out and joined us. Dude, that was awesome. The Lister. The stop in Austin was great. The sub sandwich that you made me go to a not Subway, not Pop Belly, not

something I've heard of was awesome. Like probably the best sub I've ever had. Where's that? ThunderCloud. It's an Austin staple. Yeah. It was just a good trip. I was happy. We went to a comedy show on Friday night. That was fun. We did. I mean that's in weekend check if we wanted to. That's true. Start that now. That would be fine. Blake, he's just working hard. He's texting me not me We got to give a we have a guy just to put timestamps on things you're not doing the timestamps I'm doing the timestamps. Okay. He says I'm supposed to add timestamps guy to us to give him sub stack access That's a little behind-the-scenes talk there. Yeah Speaking of behind-the-scenes talk also saw John Kukla today the great John Kukla from Fox 4. Yeah I saw Poppy. What's Poppy? The dog. Oh the

is it like a seeing-eye dog or something? Yeah but we found out a minute ago that it's instead of being a seeing eye dog, it's basically like the telecom of seeing eye dogs. It's gonna seed generations of seeing eye dogs. Well, it won't seed, right? It's a lady. Oh, is it? Okay. What do they call the thing, uh, bandana? I was gonna say that a hobo would carry somehow all his possessions in that's tied on a stick. Well that they actually call a bendle I'd learned. Okay well then maybe it's a bandana portion of it yeah. Yeah there's a really weird bit here so they it's not housed us we're at Fox 4

and where our studio is it's kind of in a back corner. They don't want anybody to see us. And also in this back corner, there's a couple of offices, and in one of those offices, a lady has a dog every day. And they said it's like a seeing, they're training it to be a seeing eye dog. I don't even get it. Like, why? Why at a TV station are they training a dog? Like, wouldn't they have other places to do that?

I'm not against it. No, no. You know, a little office dog. Better be a friendly dog, right? You wouldn't want to... It's kind of confusing. ...dog like attacking the blind guy. I don't know, maybe we'll mix it up a little bit.

But this morning when I walked in, they got this seeing eye training dog wearing a bandana around its butt like a diaper. And she said, oh, she's in heat. Okay. So it's like an anti-F measure. Well, I think also blood. You ever had the dog in heat?

No, never had a lady dog. It's gnarly. I've only had male dogs. It's very gnarly. Okay, that's that makes a lot of sense then. Hell that might have been how I learned what a period was. From your dog? Yeah, I mean I think that that was probably before maybe I knew about like sex but I don't think I knew that there was gonna be a blood involved. They don't lead with that. And you're like eight?

Yeah, but then we had two little yellow lab puppies. They were sisters and they were not spayed or neutered or fixed or whatever, and they would bleed a lot. Then you were like, then you saw in the entertainment news that night there was gonna be a period piece coming out starring Gwyneth Paltrow, and you're like, whoa. The whole thing is just about.

So yeah, anyway, why did I get to, oh. Kukla. When I was talking to Kukla and he said, hey, I'm surprised Blake missed this last week. Like in the monthly business review, he said, I didn't get a chance to wish you guys a happy anniversary for being here at the Fox Studios. Apparently, it was like March 25th-ish last year

was our first day. Who could forget? Up and flying from the Fox studios. I think we all could forget. We all did forget. So I'll look it up. I'll find it out on the calendar at some point. And then our lives will be, and it's not on our calendar, I guess, that we have for sale. Probably at an extremely discounted price now, if you go to dumbzonemerch.com. But I wouldn't mind doing a, just jumping in with a weekend check. We can promote that we have Jared Sandler on the show today, like we do every Monday,

Calcolo Rangers and give away a pair of tickets. Are we doing that? Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Without Blake? That's the plan. Okay. And if that one messes up, you'll be mad at Clayton.

There's no way I don't get to 100 innings by the end of May, by the way. Are you really? I don't know about really, but if it's a Sunday afternoon, I mean, yeah. You know what? I watch these games from home, but had I been going to a sporting event then, there's only one number I need. Four? It's 844-RIDE-DFW. Okay. There's only one number I need. Four?

It's 844RIDE DFW. Okay, a lot of fours in there. Elite Rides. Elite Rides is great, man. They are. They have an app you can book. They've got AI, Al, Ali, Hell. I don't know about this copy.

I know that it's easy to book. Which you can do with 844RIDE DFW or on the app. Like you always know it's easy to book. Mm-hmm. Clean. Which you can do in 844RideDFW or on the app. Like you always know it's going to be clean, because they've got a fleet of vehicles, and it's not like you're going to get some guys. You're not going to get Clayton's truck picking you up. No, you're not going to have. It's going to be a beautiful.

TC used to tell me when he was in the ride share game, people would constantly complain about his dog hair. Do you know what he would do about that? Nothing. He's TC. Nothing and that's why he doesn't work in a Elite Ride. Can you imagine Blake driving up in his 260,000 mile Mazda beater that he drives around? Cigarette burns in it. Not Elite Rides DFW. Disgusting. Not with Elite Rides DFW. So whether it's Rangers games, heck we got stars playoffs coming up, concerts. Book it with Elite Rides DFW. So whether it's Rangers games, heck, we got Stars Playoffs coming up, concerts. Book it with Elite Rides DFW. Tell them the dumb zone sent you,

and you can do that by using promo code DZ15 for 15% off your first ride. DZ15, 844RIDEDFW, Elite Rides DFW. These are the best rides. The best rides in DFW. That a new bed, I dig it. We've been working on beds. Hell yeah, man. You can get a lot done when you're driving

a five hour drive on a Saturday and somebody else is driving. Yeah, I didn't have that luxury. I love somebody else driving, dude. I do too, but I- Like Elite Rides. If Elite Rides is driving. I love somebody else driving, dude. I do too, but I... Like Ely Rides. If Ely Rides is driving. I'd love somebody else just giving me a drive. If I'm with a few people and I can work.

But with me and Saroy, it was like both of us felt like a jerk about just soloing it, you know? Like I kept telling him, just like, please put on headphones so I don't have to talk to you. And he wouldn't. Not really. You know, I would have ignored you. But if you have what you guys had,

yeah, you can pour over some stuff. So Friday night, let me set the scene real quick. So I told you guys that I was going to go see. Oh, we're jumping right to this? Well, I just wanted to say that I was going to go see a comedian in Tulsa last week. But then I had purchased those tickets before we had our Lone Star Central Texas trip planned.

I gave those tickets away, and a listener went, he sent me photos, said it was a great time. And then on Friday, that's as far as I went as far as going, looking at seeing Stavros, Stavros Halkias, He was not coming to DFW. So Thursday we parked at the Rose in downtown San Antonio and the people from the venue were not there yet so Clayton had to wait on them while we went

and walked around, tried to interview people. And he said, hey, when we got back, he's like, hey, Stavi just walked by. He must be in San Antonio. So I looked and he was. It wasn't until eight or nine o'clock. Our show was over at six. So I just figured, let's do it.

I'm at least gonna go. It was down the street from the venue. But one thing in my head was like, man, if all these guys go, now it's on me if this is funny or not. When we went to Rogan's club, it was understood like, hey, this is an experience. I am not telling you that this will be funny.

I don't know anybody who's gonna be here, so don't be upset with me. And I had to be very clear with Mike Saroy about that, because he was not entertained at the Rogan club. So when I'm trying to sell him on this, he's like, really, dude? You're not exactly one for one right now. And then once you got involved, I was like, oh, no. If this sucks, I am really going to relive the TMZ tour.

Well, I wasn't involved till the last second. I know. And that was all on me, as you know. Yeah. So we were kind of debating whether or not we should buy tickets. And there was a listener there who went with five of us, and none of us know his name.

Oh, you still don't? At this point, it felt better just to not ask. So Roy hung out with him for like an hour, just the two of them. But he was just standing there. He was a guy who had a couple kids, or a kid and a wife, he was like, yeah, the wife's out of town, I just live like 45 minutes away, I guess I'm just gonna go back.

I was like, you know what? And he had mentioned to me he was a come town or a Stavie fan. And I'm like, why don't you just go with us, it's 40 extra bucks. People do win with the dumb zone. Yeah, well I bought something that was supposedly 40 bucks in his like 90s, a lot of fees. What's up with that. And I got ripped off. I thought Kid Rock was working on it. I got ripped. He was very timely with that. I got ripped off. I have to get a

credit back for about $500 on the company card. Ooh. Yeah. Fortunately they let me purchase tickets there. I showed up. They, my six tickets couldn't scan. They said, why don't you walk over to the box office? And now I got five bros standing behind me and me up there talking to these people. They have to call in the manager. It's a whole big thing, dude.

I thought we were beyond getting scanned when you used the- I used StubHub. StubHub or SeatGeek or something. I thought- I used StubHub and I did the fan protection thing. They tried to scan my tickets. I had six images on a PDF that I could scroll through and see. They tried to scan one of them and they were like,

this ticket's already been scanned. And I'm like, I don't know what to tell you, man. And they were like, well, and it was scanned with an order for only two tickets. This is just a two ticket order. I'm like, well, and it was scanned with an order for only two tickets. This is just a two ticket order. I'm like, well, it's got six on the PDF, so you tell me, dude. I'll just get my money back, we'll go home.

It's not that big of a deal. Turns out the six tickets on the PDF were just two tickets copied three times, so that if I looked at it, I would scroll up and think there were six and then when all hope was lost and I'd already told the boys we were going home they were like we do have six tickets you can buy and they gave them to me with no fees. Okay so StubHub will credit you back the money you bought and you got

cheap teat cheaper. Like half price from what I paid with the fees. That's probably a good idea to show up at a show like that like right when it's starting. It said sold out and that's a thing, it wasn't. I think the move is to scam yourself. I had two seats next to me empty. Yeah, I don't know, they may be doing some Mavs level attendance line, but we got in.

The five of us and listener. And guy. I never want to know your name by the way. We had a great time. Do you want to know my situation? Yes. So yeah, during the day you're like, assuming I didn't want to go, and during the day you were right.

It was like a long day, all that kind of stuff. Leaving early. But then, I mean, especially during the week, I get ready for the next day's show, I just I don't know, I just feel like I don't like doing stuff during the week. But now it's Friday and we didn't have a show for another few days. And the show wraps up. We're like, what was it, five or six o'clock Friday?

Yeah, it was like six. And I knew you were going with five other people. And then I was thinking about just being in the house by myself. Like I was describing this to my wife, she's like, well you love being by yourself. Well yeah, it's kind of more like when you're not. Yeah. Like she's.

It must just be that he loves being alone in the house. I do love being alone. And being at my house is different than just sitting in some rental house in north San Antonio. Just totally alone. My stuff isn't in there. Not a comfortable place to sit and all that.

And I just thought about the prospect of that and thought, that sounds like it might kind of suck. And I don't, I'm not that beat. I'm feeling good. Maybe I'll try to go. So I started, I can't remember, SubHub or SeatGeek, one of those. And I'm scrolling through and I found a ticket and I'm looking at it. And don't put it up yet.

I have a picture of the ticket. So I'm like, it and don't don't put it up yet I have a picture of the ticket so I'm like do I do this like while we're driving back we had to drive back the big bus and then get your car to drive downtown to barely make it on time yeah well we're not getting our equipment jacked yeah and I'm like all right you know what I'll pull the tree let's just, I'll just do it. I'll go out with the guys, who knows? It'll be a fun time and all that. Even though you told me we're not gonna have enough room

to drive you home. Was that true? Yeah. Do you only have one third row seat? No, okay, so two things. One, I kind of forgot that was back there. I'm gonna be totally honest. So did you have an open seat for me?

It would have been really, really tight. OK, because I ubered back. It would have been extremely tight. We have some big boys in our group between Sorroy and Gra- I mean, yeah, it's- We really do, man. It's not a full travel party. I never realized how big Clayton is.

What size shoe do you wear, Clayton? 15 2e. Jesus Christ. Is 2e like a width thing? Yeah, it's extra wide. What's your T-shirt size? When people want to send us T-shirts and they'll ask everybody's T-shirt. Like Lone Star Beer asked.

Like on our way down they're like, hey what's your T-shirt sizes? We'll go grab a couple T-shirts. 4 XLT. 4 XL. T! Like on our way down they're like, hey what's your t-shirt sizes? We'll go grab a couple t-shirts. 4XLT. 4XLT! So he's not a little stump. No. He is a growing boy. A giant human being. And Lone Star brought him a hat. They're like, I don't know that. Look. We just have a. Universal. 4XLT like lying around.

We could get them one. Yeah. Which they will. Thank you, Lone Star Beer. Go to lonestarbeer.com and put in dumb zone 21 and see if you can order yourself a 4XLT. So anyway, I decided once I found this ticket, because if you're searching for a single ticket... Options are... There's a lot of options. Yeah, limitless. Here's the ticket. Clayton's gonna put it up on the screen and you could read it for those who are

listening to the audio. Take a look at my... What? You bought Row 1 103? How was this available? I was absolutely directly in front of Stavros. How is that free? In fact, so of course I had a little early bird fun on the way down. So I'm just sitting in, you know getting in the groove and everything before the show by myself. The best. I was the third seat in a row. The two seats, 101 and 102, were empty and remained so throughout the entire show. And I was like, should I move down one so I'm not right next to this guy?

Or will then he think I'm a homophobe or something? I don't know. So I don't know. I ain't not just saying where I was. And I was thinking it was too close. But after the opening act, he was pretty good too, I realized, boy, I could just spread my, hang my legs out, I could just put my leg up on the wall in front of, it was great.

It was the greatest seat I've ever had, and it was like a $50 ticket, which turned into 90 with fees. Still, I mean, that's about what we paid for the middle section. It was the best seat I've ever had to any show. That's crazy. And I bought it an hour, literally an hour

before the concert started. Yeah. First row. That's wild. Yeah, so maybe you can get scammed or maybe you can get the best seat in the house. And I'll tell you what, Stavros, I only know him from you talking about him for years.

He's on tires. And it was one of the greatest comedy shows I've ever been to. I thought he was effing hilarious. Like his is unbelievable. I can't I can't even remember. Like it was it was gold throughout. There wasn't like, oh, this is the high moment and I'll just definitely remember this

because I don't know, his self-deprecating humor, his fat guy humor, anything he did, I thought nailed it. I would have been happy being there another hour. I'd like, you know, sometimes you're at a show and you're like, oh yeah, they're dragging out. Like they don't really have 45 minutes of material. This guy went like an hour strong and then just kind of bailed at any point.

He could have, anything could have been his ender. That's awesome. That makes me very, very happy. It was hilarious. I didn't think you, I came away from it thinking like, oh, I've seen him a couple of times and I've seen his specials and seen him do crowd work special.

And I didn't think that was like his strongest night. But the fact that everyone we went with was like, I really enjoyed that. That was really good. That made me happy. And I also thought it was cool just from the hot button topics of last week. I just think he threads the needle of not punching down,

but also not being like woke guy. You know what I mean? He describes like, hey, there's a way to say things where you're not just being a dick. You're not just saying this word or saying these things to be mean. And I just felt like he had a really, it felt really good after the Rogan Club.

You know? I mean, the crowd wasn't like begging for him to say a slur. Now, they were almost 100% in unison supporting Luigi Mangione. Yeah. That's, that one seemed to play pretty well in the crowd, but no, it was a lot of fun and I'm very glad. So Uber Drive back,

do you ever choose no conversation? I've never actually had the balls to do it. Because I didn't want to say anything. And I think that guy got that vibe pretty quick. Because he looked like he was trying to be chatty in the beginning. But I also didn't. I thought I'd be an asshole if you click that. Have you ever done it Michael

Have you ever actually said don't like I've never done the temperature either no no I just like whatever whatever I get I get Yeah, I don't mess with anything. Let's get in I wonder who who does well because it makes It makes it the case that there are people who are selecting like more Right because it starts out in the middle. I'm pretty sure do you think that somebody because I It makes it the case that there are people who are selecting like more, right? Because it starts out in the middle, I'm pretty sure. Do you think that because I did not check that, he's like, oh, this guy wants to talk.

So he starts asking me how my weekend's been and all that. I think it depends on the Uber driver. I actually have talked to TC about this, and he's like, it doesn't really affect me. I'm not trying to strike up a conversation. But if they're one who that's their normal mode, they may need to be told that. But what happens if you hit like more?

You just sit down and start going through, like you play who wants to be a millionaire pepper on with questions? I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. I mean, I feel it my days of peppering the Uber driver with like, so what's going on with cash man? How come fucking India and Pakistan just can't figure this shit out man? I don't fucking think that's associated with.

I think that may be over. With alcohol? Yeah. I do want to apologize. On the way down I was backseat driving. You had to actually just say hey stop talking to me and I did. I felt so bad about that. No you were right that I wasn't trying to be a jerk. No I was I had to be introspective and go you know what he's right and I don't like to be driving and have

someone go oh should you have turned there? But like because I'm looking at my thing and I'm like all right but I need to issue a public apology. Part of the problem is that- I want you to correct me. I want you to tell me my apple eating bothers you so that I cannot do it around. I want that. Look, I feel like that goes both ways. The problem with shutting off the backseat driver is now the pressure is on.

You better not mess that up. I got so nervous afterward. And, cause it's not that Dan was like, hey, yelling like, hey, hey, turn here, whatever. It's that when Dan is not driving, I've noticed this, when he has the phone in his hand, first of all, I already mapped it, but sure, why not, second set of eyes. He's in the back seat.

He's calling out every direction. He's like, hey, hey, make sure you exit up here north. Next one. And I'm like, I know. Yeah. So we did it. And he's like, you probably need to get over. We're going west up here.

And that was the third time I was like, shut up. Stop talking. You're making me even more nervous. And I did. But then once you did it, I was like, oh, if I screw up now, I'm never going to hear the end of it. No. I realized it was on me.

It was a great time, man. I really knew we had fucking Taco Gate, where our car went to Taco Bell on the way back. And I was not a part of this because I'm a picky eater. And I don't like to pick up food and take it home. I either want to eat it in the car or have it delivered home. I don't know why. But when you're with a group of big boys

and they're on late night, they just want to order like the party pack. I don't think Clayton had eaten all day either. Probably not. He has really weird eating habits. He mostly exists off of Lucy and caffeine. But in any case, they're debating now if they want the 12 or the 24.

And by debating, I don't mean quietly or calmly or once we got up there we just ordered. I mean, Matt Dallas and Clayton and Blake are arguing about this, and Saroy. And we're doing it in front of the speaker. And they settled on, fuck dude, we need two boxes, we need 24. 12 is not enough. Clayton's like, I'm eight, I'm eight for sure myself. And this all happens and then finally, whoever was Blake was like we'll take two of the party taco boxes and the lady was like oh I can only sell you one. What? And the whole crowd started laughing she was like hahaha no I'm just playing.

Oh yes! I heard y'all laughing about it I just wanted... I was like alright lady having a little fun at the Taco Bell late night drive-thru. You got us! A fun drive-thru. You got us. Then we got home, and we needed two boxes. Eight, Clayton? You can eat eight tacos? He might have pushed into double digi. I pushed it.

Because, yeah, Matt was on my ass about it. He was challenging you? Well yeah, and we all sat down around, like Blake made his little taco bowl, Saroy had a couple. That's what Blake does now. Yeah, he's bowl guy. No carbs guy.

And like I'm sitting there, I get to my six, which is... Allotted. Yeah. And Matt goes, oh, I thought you were gonna eat eight I'm like Matt you haven't even touched a taco yet like half of us are about ready to go to bed you haven't touched a taco why are dudes like this I don't know and he's like we do with drinking we do it oh yeah that's you're gonna keep up with me tonight yeah the guy just let just let him live his taco life.

Let him eat as many tacos as he wants. So I housed two more. And on the last one, I just let Matt know on the last bite when I was done with a. Did you guys finish two party packs? Yeah. By the time the next morning, it was gone when I left. So yeah, that's our Friday night.

It was quite a bit of fun. I drove home Saturday morning, dropped off Saroy around noon. And I slept so freaking much this weekend. I was exhausted, dude. I was gonna tell you this. I have not slept over seven hours in a couple of years. Yeah. And yeah, I went to bed at 1130 Saturday night, woke up at eight, which is eight and a half hours

for those with the math. And I felt like ass all day yesterday. It takes a little time. The weather didn't know. I finally got an hour and a half extra sleep. Over eight hours sleep, I thought, I'm going to feel great. And I just felt shitty all day. Like horrible. Yeah. Like sick. I don't know if it was sore or just something, but then it's all gone now.

I'm feeling fine. Yeah, the weather wasn't great. I slept my customary six hours last night, so maybe that's part of it. Nice. You want to get less sleep, folks. Watched a lot of sports. Watched, oh, we got a fire drill or something here. What if it's not a drill?

What should we do? Just roll through it. This is how you do it. Had a couple quick notes to share with you guys. I went to a kid's play place yesterday morning, met up with a few of the moms and their kids, and the husbands didn't come to the play date. So I was there by myself.

So it's like a two hour ordeal, and at one point I just went to the car to call my dad. Like, what am I doing in here? The ladies are talking, the kids are playing, I shouldn't even be here. The fact that I am there changes nothing. So I went outside. So I had a little call with my dad,

and this is really gross, but I recorded that guy in the bathroom, so you know what to expect. But as I was getting out of my car, like outside, like I farted pretty loud. I don't know, I wasn't thinking about like, oh this needs to be silent. In fact, it was probably a fart I was holding in my car.

And it was like, oh now I'm out, I'll fart. But there was a lady that I didn't see getting her kid out of her car, like right next to me, parked, and it was a loud fart, you know? Just an adult man, outdoor fart. Yeah. And it was like right next to her. And what sucked was she went inside with me.

So I was there for like another 45 minutes to an hour like walking and this, I mean, there's no way she didn't hear, it was a, you know, it was gross fart directed at her. And it wasn't like I could tell my wife why this is weird, I just had to bask in the strangeness of it for like the next hour of this lady to just, no, and she was moderately attractive, you know. Makes it worse.

Young mom. Oh yeah. That was pretty gross. Let's see, what else did we do? I just watched a butt ton of sports. Played sports, had a flag game yesterday in the cold. It was no fun, but fun. Dude, yesterday was horrible, man.

It was. Like, what's going on here? It was, and it doesn't, the whole kid situation, you're just stuck in the house. You're trying to do anything, it's just shitty. But yeah, outside of that, man, I watched a boatload of sports. I don't think I did much else. Got back on track for the week. Let me mention Qualis Roofing, because I was going back and forth with Brian about a couple things this weekend.

Qualis Roofing is great. I was going back and forth with Brian about a couple things this weekend. Qualis Roofing is great. They wanted to tell me, or tell us, or tell you, that you know how you get beaten down by the people knocking on the door after there's a big storm? Oh yeah. The Church of Latter-day Roofing. He said they could email you you a do not solicit we are with Qualis sign for your front door.

And you don't even need to use Qualis, he said. If they just want a, if you just want a hey, don't bother me, they'd appreciate if you put that sign up. It worked for my family growing up with an alarm system. Absolutely. We never got robbed. Yeah. We didn't with an alarm system. Absolutely. We never got robbed. We had a fake alarm. We didn't have an alarm at that time.

You ever see the, they'll sell like the fake camera thing. The little, uh. OK. Oh, yeah. The, the, what do you call it? The ring type thing. It's like a ring, it's like a round little ball. It's like a thing, but it's shaded like sunglasses,

and it's up on the ceiling. Like at the mall? But that's where there's a camera inside there. They'll sell that, and you could put it on your porch. I mean, Qualis doesn't sell it. Qualis doesn't sell it. I want to be clear about that. Comp here.

Qualis, they're a roofing company. They fixed, hell, they put a new roof on my house, on the Dragon Den. They helped out, I think we're up to hundreds of our listeners, if not possibly to a thousand. So it's QualisGC.com. They also will pay for a sit-in on your behalf if you end up getting a roof. QualisGC.com. Everybody wins. They're also hiring. Project managers, sales, and DFW in Austin. Tons of training. Great pay. You know, they- I don't think you'd be the judge of that, but hit them up. QualisGC.com. Get a roof,

a sit-in, a job. They love the dumb zone listener They really do eight one seven five zero zero nine zero zero eight oh even if you just get a an inspection Free t-shirt or a free subscription This is who qualis is that's look you meet Brian For two seconds. I mean this guy's gonna give me some shit for two seconds. This guy's gonna give me some shit. Then he does. Yeah, I realize that's a boring weekend,

but I was in recover mode, man. Did a lot of freaking laundry, dishes, this sort of thing. Oh my gosh. So I- Doesn't appear that a whole lot happens when I'm gone. No. My wife did not run whole lot happens when I'm gone. No. My wife did not run the dishwasher once when I was gone. Dude.

So I came home and it's... Can I tell you something? Dishwasher's full, sink is full. Full? You already loaded it. She's like, this is what you do. I got home and the dishes... She knows this is my game, I do the dishes.

So she just decided I'm not gonna do it at all while he's gone. Every dish I use, I will leave for him. And the thing that sucks, if you're me and the kids are there, you're completely castrated. If you suggest anything, then it's like, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, in the sink. I'm like, I didn't leave any in the sink. I left it perfect, but that means she's been doing this. So then I go to get a cup out of the dishwasher, and I'm like, stinky. And I look at her and she's like, oh, those aren't clean. I'm like, it's full.

Right, that's exactly what I'm doing. Yeah, I didn't run it. I'm like, that's the part that's easy! You just put those, you don't even have, you just put a pod of soap in there Press a button. It's the one that says wash heavy That's it's crazy to me, but anyways we got it squared away You got anything to add Clayton Michael or weekend I

Just slept Clayton, Michael, for weekend? I just slept as much as I possibly could. It was a tiring week. Did I say that word weird? Tiring. That was a lot. I think Michael was busy being nervous about today. Yeah. He called him yesterday. I'm glad you're actually thinking about it. Yeah. Unlike Blake. I took a lot of notes, transcribed a lot of videos. Made a chart. Ooh, chart.

I love a good chart, bro. Yeah, that was yesterday. Jake, you said something last week. It's like generic suburban weekend or something like that. That's perfect. Yeah. You have a lot of those these days. I've got two kids.

So it's a lot of just. What are the ages? I'm bad with the months. One's a baby baby, right? Yeah, she'll be one in June. So for anybody at home doing the math. Less than one. Yeah, less than one.

And then my oldest will be three this weekend. So it's a lot of like, you're in the playroom. Yeah. You're sitting there. Look, there's absolutely nothing wrong with settling in and accepting the idea that your weekend will largely consist of maybe you get a little exercise for yourself in yeah but you know you're gonna go watch soccer you're gonna go to play places you're going to

probably have to have a meal with the in-laws and at night you're gonna get a little high and if the Rangers get a sweep you're gonna get a little high. And if the Rangers get a sweep, you're gonna get laid. And these are the only good things that will happen in your life, but they're good enough. Yeah. It's pretty sweet. Some people- I kinda love it.

You go through that period where you complain like, oh my gosh, look how old we are. Yeah, life is over. It's Friday night and we're just sitting here at home. I love sitting at home on Friday night bro maybe go grocery shopping on Friday night Oh I went grocery shopping yesterday because it's empty no one else is there good cuz you're a loser so good yeah like if errands have to be run are you quick to throw your hand up I'll go yeah and you know what sometimes I'll even

take my daughter just cuz it's fun and she's easy and it counts as spending time with her yeah I'm like yeah let's just because it's fun and she's easy and it counts as spending time with her Yeah, I'm like, yeah, let's just go hang out go to the store. Whatever life is good is what I'm telling you Dan and it's pretty boring Pretty although boring lives are good big week Got a big night out Wednesday night, baby That's right, that would be some sports talk.

You know what though, let's start with... Did we hear your weekend, are you done? I thought, what have we been talking about here for 20 minutes? I don't know, I just feel like you kinda threw it over. You said you slept, you said you just wanted to make sure you did a little... Yeah, I was kinda sick yesterday.

Okay. Dishes weren't done. I washed all the dishes when I got home. Okay. Did some finger banging. Say hello to the hub or whatever. I don't know what I did say. You want to hear about me.

We want to hear about your bracket and Scenario is the one who had that bracket challenge. Yeah. And see, their bit though is it's a data company. You know? Yes, I do. I'm very intrigued by that. Data integration, data analytics, custom solutions, and they have a bit right now. Just for our listeners, they will give a free sample dashboard using your data. Send them an Excel or CSV file and explain what you're looking for.

They will make an interactive dashboard for you to experience the scenario platform viewing your data. Yeah, they're offering 69% off their Quick Start package. And if you sign a 12-month contract of at least $6. 690 a month they'll pay for a sit-in data at synerio.com and they will schedule you a data therapy session now that we're small business owners we have data everywhere of all types and it's always easier if you can just see it all right there I'm gonna get my parents their business set up with Scenario here in the next couple of weeks. So if you have data all over the place,

it's confusing, maybe this is not really your thing, they can do it for you. So hit them up, data, D-A-T-A, at Scenario, S-Y-N-E-R-I-O.com, it's data integration, data analytics. Let them make this easy for you with scenario. I did watch Duke, or at least the end of the game. Yeah. Cuz everybody was talking.

Hey, did you say Chappie as Houston? He had Houston against the field. Okay. Which, you know, it's a one seed, but still But still, I didn't think they'd make it this far. Were they the lowest one seed? That I don't know. I mean, I know they weren't the highest. But I don't know.

Maybe Auburn was. Yeah, I don't know that they were the lowest. But heck, man. Second time I've seen a team just absolutely, well, heck, I don't know, third or fourth time, but the Tech Florida game and the Duke Houston game are both games that members of the losing team will remember forever.

That was brutal. And you know, I know you can take issue with some of the calls or non-calls. Boy, Whitlock had a banger of a tweet on that. What was it? Well, it was the play where Cooper Flag was called for an offensive foul and it was pretty clearly a defensive foul.

The reaching over the? Yeah. Okay. And a black ref had called the foul. And Whitlock blamed DEI. But it was really interesting. He actually didn't blame DEI for the call, he blamed DEI for him perceiving it racially. He's like, the DEI culture has made it to where

I wonder if this ref made this call, because he's black and the player's black and Cooper Flagg is a golden white boy. And he's like, I didn't make it this way, they did. That's the same! That's genius. It is, that's what I was saying. As I was first reading the tweet, I was like,

this is boring, and then once I realized what he was doing, I was like, yeah, that's actually great. He's brilliant. It's this lady's fault for wearing that. I don't know, generally a pretty boring, pretty boring turn of it, man. I don't know if this is the way of the future, if we're just headed towards dominant five stars.

I mean, I guess on that front Houston is kind of cool because it's not Duke, and Houston's been in what, seven Final Fours without winning one the most. Yeah, everybody wants not Duke until you don't have Duke, and now you're like, huh. Yeah, but I mean it's Houston, it's not like it's Weber State or something like that.

I don't know, it doesn't feel like that's coming back. I was surprised to hear that Houston's never won it before. Same, if you had told me. I thought the Ralph Sampson, the Lajuan era. Boy, speaking of a king, did you see him? Wait, were they together? Yeah, no wait, they were together in Houston, not in college.

Did you see, did you see him blocking Olajuwon from getting on the floor? No. That's just, I don't know. There's a special type of security guard in the sports world who doesn't know anything about sports and he basically thinks he's on SEAL Team Six and he's gonna carry it like that thinks he's on SEAL Team Six,

and he's gonna carry it like that, and it's just confused, old Hakim, like, why can't I? I know he's not Takebe, but it's the same voice to me. Yeah, pretty boring tournament. Pretty boring tournament. But then yesterday, and really over the weekend, we had two Mavs games, of over the weekend, you know, we had two Mavs games of which they were destroyed in both. Saturday's game was straight up

embarrassing. I went back and watched that on Sunday morning. They were healthy Sands, you know, Gafford, but they started Washington Lively and Davis for the first time together. And... Yeah, like that was gonna be real scary. That was the bit, right? Well, I mean, yes, and I know you're super down on them, but playing two bigs that can both play big is at least an interesting idea. It's working for some other teams,

but they don't have a point guard. Spencer Denwitty is playing point guard, and it's a disgusting watch most nights. So they are flirting with the 10 seed. So despite the fact that their ownership group is trying to give away tickets to a home play-in game to all season ticket holders, most of which are probably not all that interested in going,

that game starting to look like it's not gonna happen. So with the standings, is there any chance they just don't make the playoffs? It's extremely, extremely small, man. Like 1%. Because Phoenix just, yeah, I mean, Phoenix has lost six in a row, Durant's out with no sign of coming back.

That's the only other team that hasn't been eliminated and it's only by like... Okay, so there's three games ahead of... Yeah, they're going to get in. The Suns. That's amazing. It really is amazing because I thought if I'm to believe a conspiracy theory for the Mavs It would be that don't worry. You're gonna get Cooper flag Well, we'll we'll make this happen, but then you guys got to do your part and

Miss the playoffs. I mean, do you know how like what are the odds for the number one pick at pick 13? Very very very low. I mean, but what are the odds that anybody would trade Luca Donchich? Yeah, no, I mean What's so funny because I still I'll listen to Who's the guy that's back? Oh, is that low? Mm-hmm, right? I'm I listen to him I listen to hoop collective, you know all the big national NBA talkers It's been two months, and they're still like, anytime you bring up the Luka trade, they're like, don't know, can't figure it out, don't know why, like, doesn't make any sense. Even if everything the Mav said was right, I still hate it.

You know, still hate it based on the haul you got. How can you sit there and watch Reeves, Austin Reeves, and say, how does how is he not on the MAVs? Like you have to demand that. You have to demand everybody but LeBron. You have to demand, hell, if you demanded LeBron, Hell, if you demanded LeBron, they would have to give him to you because you are offering Luca. And so, if you think I'm going to forget about it, like being here and having already planned the next decade of my life to be enjoying this guy in front of me, you know, even the NBA bigwigs can't, anybody that ever brings it up,

this is not something that, okay, we'll move on now because it just happened. It's still, this is what happens when it's the worst trade in NBA history. You're going to talk about it for a while. Not for just the rest of this year. Like for the rest of your life, you're going to talk about this. Any trade that is

made from here on out, you're going to look back at this. When I see somebody that is sentenced for a crime, I will always say, yeah, but Ethan Couch walked away, but this guy gets 14 years for stealing something. You know Like, not Ethan, was it Ethan Couch? The influenza? Yeah, affluenza. Affluenza. The point is, like, I look at that, that was such a big thing, it was like, oh my gosh,

and then everything in the future, I will go back to that and go, how does it rank against that? That's what you're going to do. You're going to have, I mean, guys, the five biggest trades before Luka ended up getting a bigger I mean, guys, the five biggest trades before Luca ended up getting a bigger haul for those guys. And the next, you know, the next big trade that happens, you're going to say, my gosh, how did they not get more for like, you're going to, you're going to

keep looking back at the Luca trade. It's, it's never, it's never going to leave you. And especially because yes, you sent him to the one team that you shouldn't send him to. Like, I'd rather have him sent to the Celtics. Oh. Then you would only play him once or twice a year. But now you're going to see him all the time. Houston and San Antonio would have been the only two I couldn't, I just couldn't handle. I mean, it's bad either way, but this is the only one that's those are the only two that aren't worst

worse and Yeah, it was he was phenomenal yesterday. They played Oklahoma City Lakers haven't really had any big wins, you know over good teams lately I'm trying to think back what would count as that, but he was, he was incredible. It was his best game as a Laker. He was in full control. He hit his first step back three of the game, like it was nothing.

He, I watched Reddick's post game interview and there was one play in particular, I think it was a Gabe, you've probably seen it. It was a Gabe Vincent corner three, where the play was for Luca to drive the lane and kick out to three But instead of kicking out he got all the way into the lane and now Vincent was behind him Well, no problem. He just simply did one of those throw it directly backward behind his back and Vincent's like oh shit We caught it and money

Guys that play with him have to get used to that. Yeah. Like, oh my gosh, I should just remember, I'm always, I always have to look. It didn't look real, I mean, except I've seen him do it 10 times in Dallas. But he was just phenomenal. And they destroyed Oklahoma City.

Now maybe Oklahoma City doesn't care because they already have seeding locked up, but the Lakers are playing well right now. And there's kind of a why not us and the West thing. I don't know, the Clippers are playing really well, the Warriors, but I don't know, I'm excited to watch Luca in the playoffs. It's gonna be a great postseason

and I'm glad that he's a part of it. My mad thoughts for the day are, I think we're gonna go Luca free Tuesday tomorrow and then Wednesday show's gonna be awesome. TC and Soroy are gonna come in here, we're gonna start late, like around three, and then TC and I are gonna take the train down to the plaza.

Mikey and Dan will be here, and then we'll be down there and try to do the show. So, very excited about Wednesday, but something that kind of flew under the radar a little bit last week, you know, we had the story of Gavin Malloy, former Mavs employee, guys worked in entertainment around Dallas for a long time and the Facebook dustup he had with Cuban. Um, we talked about that story like two days after it happened.

And then in the perpetual confusion I have with the news cycle, it took about a week for it to become a national story but then it did and part of what Cuban said in that Facebook rant that made news was that you know I'll just read it actually I fully expected to run basketball the NBA wouldn't let me put it in the contract they took it out I thought they would stick to the word because they didn't know the first thing about running a team. Someone obviously changed their mind. Well, if you recall that Tom Segura interview with Cuban, he referenced the Celtic sale and like, Oh, it's different than the Celtics thing.

And he just kind of threw that out there as like a smoke screen, which the situation with the Celtics sale is that their current CEO is going to stay in the role through 27-28. So they did put that in the contract. Silver doesn't consider the two situations similar and said the situation was very different in Dallas. It was a clear change in control of the franchise to the Dumont family. Any decision as to what Mark's role would be in basketball ops was a

function of an arrangement between Cuban and Dumont. Whether or not his expectation was that he would have played more role in basketball ops, I don't think Mark has ever suggested that there was a contractual issue at play here. That was just his understanding of what the arrangement would be between I don't think Mark has ever suggested that there was a contractual issue at play here That was just his understanding of what the arrangement would be between him and Dumont And I was telling somebody this the other morning when they asked me about this When Cuban did that like oh league wouldn't put let me put it in there. He's popping off at the mouth. I Feel like we've heard him talk enough times over the years to know. So he lied. I don't know that it's as much lying as saying something like, hey, can we put that in there?

And the Dumont's saying no, or the league saying, that's a bit tricky, we're going to have to work on it. It wasn't an immediate rubber stamp, yes, green light, that's in the deal. So he, you know, speaking stem perenniously is like, ah, league said no. Well, the Celtics owner and CEO are, you know, same person working it out. He lost. He lost. And now he's trying to publicly save face. And the league is like, oh no, no.

Well, he didn't tell you you couldn't put it in there. It's just not in there. Now you figure out how that happened. Yeah, that does make him save face because that's something you had brought up a while back is why this guy, Mark Cuban, who is on top of everything, wouldn't have made sure that's in there.

Yeah. Like would have just done a verbal agreement or a handshake deal? That doesn't seem like stuff Mark Cuban does. I mean it's not just me, but I'm gonna selfishly say that I think he started saying that after people in the media started really making that a topic. Like what happened here dude?

Cause like the Seguro thing was not long after that and he kinda just got into it like oh, he said I couldn't do it. I don't know that I buy that. And Adam Silver's straight up coming out and saying, that's not how we see it. We don't see it as a contract thing, so. See, I love Cuban for all he's done.

Are you mad at Cuban? Do we? No, I think both are true. We're trying to be mad somewhere. No, I think both are true. We're trying to be mad somewhere. No, I mean, both are true. I mean, are we mad at him for actually just selling to this team without putting that stuff in there? Is it that it's so incredulous

that he never would have thought? I gotta make sure, like, cause the only reason we are mad is because we're not mad they lost Cuban. We're mad they lost Luka. Yeah, I mean, that's obviously related. One is the same. But he would never think of, I have to put in that you have to make sure you don't trade this guy. Because nobody would trade this guy. No, but he did hire Nico.

Maybe he didn't know Nico as well as he thought, but he did bring a guy in who executed a coup against him under the leadership of people that he sold the team to. So I don't know, I mean, yeah, he's a big part of the reason I love basketball. Big part of the reason I got into learning numbers and analytics in the NBA. And Dirk was here because of Cuban. And stayed here because of Cuban.

So I love the guy. For what he's meant to me in my life, but this is, it is what it is. I mean, I think this is an overshadowing part of his legacy. I don't know how it's not. I'm never going to think of the Mavericks ever again for the rest of my life in any other way than the team that traded Luka Doncic when he was 25. And...

It's nowhere near the same thing when he let Nash walk, but it was a pretty big deal. And to his great credit, he did not go hide in the shadows. Like Dumont and Nico Harrison are doing now and have been doing. Oh, he wrote like a 15,000 word blog. He was head on. Uh, I, yeah, I remember him calling our show just to jump on on because he wanted, he heard us talking about it and wanted,

like he was, he had his reasons and nobody liked those reasons. And it actually turned out that everybody else was right in the long run. Dyson Chandler situation, not that different. You know, I still think there was sound logic to that, but he didn't run from that. He was out to read the CBA.

Right. So I mean, not that I wanna hear Nico talking every day, but it does seem cowardly the way they are reacting here. What do you think Wednesday night will be like for, like you think Dumont's in his seat? I don't know. Because if he is, he's gonna,

Luke is gonna terrorize him. There's no way. Dumont? There's no way Nico or Dumont's. Nico I don't think. Because if he is, he's gonna, Luke is gonna terrorize him. There's no way. Dumont? There's no way Nico or Dumont's. Nico I don't think is in the crowd. I think that would be a bad idea. You think it'd be a bad idea for a GM to be in a crowd at his own home game?

I do. Two months after a trade. I do. I mean, he hasn't done it much, he's done it a little, and I think he should not this time. But Dumont, I mean, I don't know, much, he's done it a little, and I think he should not this time. But Dumon, I mean, I don't know, you're down there on the floor.

You're a bit insulated from it, but I mean, I think we need to have a sell the team chant. I don't know how to get this information out there, and I certainly don't think I'm the one to be like, hey, I'm gonna come up with a list of chants. But we do have this platform, and I think sell the team should be one of them. What I'm debating is like, when to do, I think in the first quarter, every

single time the Lakers are at the line, you go fire Nico. I think you might do it. Every time the Lakers, I don't know. I feel like when Lucas got the ball, it's MVP. All right. I have a lot to hold on. I have a lot to say about this for predictions. But first let's work in and talking about own well for a second. They got some new copy points today too. So That is because tax assessments are coming up. Oh yeah. General deadline, May 15th.

So ownwell.com the dumb zone. Ownwell.com slash the dumb zone will help you save on those property taxes. Like I mentioned with some of our other commercial partners here, they're here to save you time. Protesting your property taxes, the appeal, a massive, massive beating. We've done it and we gave up.

We eventually just gave up. Own well won't. They will fight for you. You know how you can prove these things sometimes? You can't. Well no, you can't. Oh, okay. Sorry, you're not really following me.

No, I was, I was kidding, but go on. I was hoping you would respond with a trove of data. I'm not following you. The way you can follow these things, No, I was. I was kidding, but go on. I was hoping you would respond with a trove of data. The way you can follow these things, over 1,800 reviews online. Wow, just like the Alamo. Like Christopher D., who said, couldn't have been easier. I just gave them my address and they took it from there. No filing appeals or spending hours to prepare for a hearing to defend my value.

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So this Luca thing Wednesday night, what's really weird, everything's weird about this whole trade. weird about this whole trade. But we've never seen an opposite A-Rod. There's been A-Rod situations before, when a beloved local athlete leaves, and then when they come back, it is a booed. So when A-Rod first went back to Seattle after signing with the Rangers, do you

remember like local radio stations were printing fake money and that was they were confetti money throwing at him and booing him every time he comes up? You've seen it in the NBA for different play. Guy, every time he touches the ball, he gets booed. Deandre Jordan when he came here after spurning the Mavericks. Yeah, you know, you see a home crowd booing an opposing player,

but you've never seen an opposing player come somewhere to be more popular than the home team. Yeah. And she, like, this arena will be rooting for Luca Doncic to win this game. Well, I mean, the only thing I could think of is if you were like an end of career legend, right? Like when Dirk was in San Antonio last year,

and they were like cheering him on. OK, yeah, but there wasn't that vitriol. It was cheering. But it wasn't that vitriol it was cheering But it wasn't like I sure hope Dirk beats the Spurs tonight Yeah, like I definitely want my team to lose and and for the ownership to feel so embarrassed They sell the team and fire the GM like they know it's a once-in-a-lifetime Going to be so loud and I really wonder Because no one's ever felt like this, how will Luca even react?

Yeah. Because at first it was, you were thinking Luca is going to want to just destroy the Mavs, but is he going to just be kind of sad? Are you going to cry? Yeah, probably. Jake. Yeah, no, there's a chance.

There's a decent chance. Just seeing him, you know... There's gonna be so many... ...in person is gonna be... ...Laker 77s. Yeah, I mean, I'm a Laker fan, so I don't know what to tell you. Those are my people. I can't even imagine...

...what this is gonna be like. It's gonna be insane. You know, in the first matchup when they played out in L.A. LeBron came back, but LeBron, I don't know that he was... Well, yeah, that was getting booed, sorry. No, I was just gonna say, like... LeBron came back and got booed in Cleveland. He was a little bit reserved in the game in LA.

He had a big night, Spock score-wise, but he didn't, like, take over. But this one will be, he's in that arena, but he's gonna turn right to go to the visitors locker room instead. Yeah, well, we still know where his spots are. Everything is going to be so familiar to him,

but it's going to be not. And he's going to, after a time out, he's gonna walk to the other bench. Like I just, I feel so bad for my little guy. My little guy, why do I feel bad for him? Cause he was sad. You could very clearly tell. He's not sad anymore, by the way.

I mean, he may get a little emotional coming back here, but they're having fun. He's destroying people again. He's toying with people. I don't even know what LeBron had yesterday. They don't need him on days like yesterday. He's going to destroy Dallas. He's going to destroy that two big thing they're trying to do with a lively guy. He's going to, yeah, he's gonna destroy Dallas. He's going to destroy that two big thing they're trying to do with a lively game.

He's gonna have 40. This one I feel good about, he'll have 40. Partially, well, it is a second out of a back-to-back, and they do have Oklahoma City again Tuesday night, so maybe I should chill out on that, but I think he's gonna be filling it up in this game. During chants, they rest him Tuesday night? I just have so many questions about like,

is there a video tribute, you know? Is there, what is there? I feel like there has been a hastily thrown together one. Because, doesn't it feel like, they didn't they do one for like, they did one for somebody else a couple weeks ago. Yeah, Kevin Grimes maybe. No, Maxey, something.

They did something. Is there a video tribute for Quentin Grimes? Do we have that? They did something recently. I don't know. Derek Jones Jr.? Maybe. Like how could you, in a sense of how can you not, but after all that's been said and

done since the trade, how could you? Yeah, it's really weird. Like all you do is taking him out of all your videos. I unfortunately have to break to pee again. Alright. I'll just go. You guys can keep going. We'll take a quick break here, folks.

The Dumb Zone, Dumb Zone, Dumb Zone, Dumb Zone, Dumb Zone. You're listening to The Dumb Zone. So unprofessional. I'm sorry. I really am. Let's just at least plug the fact that we're gonna be out at the Byron Nelson May 2nd Friday. Oh yeah. You know I love golf. This is going to be a party. The CJ Cup at the Byron Nelson. General admission is $75 and we will be there. Come by and watch us cheer on old Willie Z.

I know you're a Willie Z guy. That's right. It rhymes with some stuff. What? Isn't his last name Zala Taurus? Yeah. There you go. So come on out to the Byron that day. What's the date of ours? May 2nd?

Friday, May 2nd. We'll be there probably going around noon, maybe a little bit after. We'll have Soroy out there with us, both Soroys. Great food and drinks, so come on out there. Come see us that Friday in the Byron Nelson. Okay, want to do some viewer mail? Sure. Hey everybody, it's time to answer some of today's viewer mail. I know you have most of a certain variety.

I do. I have a fresh batch of beats. For my beat farm. But I have a little follow up on Gretzky versus Ovechkin Yeah, man What a day So Ovechkin. Oh, you know what? I put a picture in there too for kind of a bad bid It was an Ovechkin picture picture Get Jake's take on this But

It was just a you know, everybody's got to run out and tweet their congratulations. So this is Major League Baseball tweeted this. I guess it's Ovechkin wearing, like, did they Photoshop that or did he come out and throw out the first pitch sometime? Yeah, I think this is probably not a Photoshop. So is this okay? Maybe a little bit, not really. It's him wearing a Washington Nationals uniform, basically. And then it says, the great one,

because it's GR and then number eight, that's the bit, as he passes Wayne Gretzky. And it says 895 on the image, and it's got the seams of a baseball. Yeah, that doesn't make any sense. That's really bad, no, that's a bad tweet. But Matt Dallas says, as we were talking about the other day,

but puts it into context, what makes him greatest, Gretzky. And like not even, Ovechkin's nowhere near Gretzky, is the assist total. Gretzky now number two in goals, but, and another buddy actually from the ticket, texted me so I won't tell you who it was. Not to get them in trouble because they can't text friends. He says, you know, it's the same thing Matt says here.

If you take away all 894 of his goals and count only his assists, he's still the NHL's all time leading scorer. It points. As if he's never scored a goal at all. He still leads everybody if you add their goals and assists. Here's what, you know? Yeah, I guess what is weird to me

about this whole discussion, maybe I just don't understand it. I don't think anybody, I never thought anybody was saying that Ovi was gonna be on par with or pass Gretzky as the greatest. But he is the greatest goal scorer of all time. And I don't think that's really,

I mean, I read a lot about this, but it's intuitive. Scoring goals now, way harder. Way, way harder. Than in the Gretzky era, yeah. And he did it in, you know, the same number of games, but I don't know, I think this is that Ovechkin is a better goal scorer, and Gretzky is the best hockey player of all time. But if you look at just some of the...

Can you look at shots on goal? What? I thought I read that Ovechkin had significantly more. Had significantly more shots on goal, so as a shooter he's not... Yeah, I mean, I guess in those situations where Gretzky was passing and getting points rather than missed shots. Yeah, I mean, whether it's the size of pads that guys wear, like if you go back and watch Gretzky highlights, I don't know, I'm not saying it's E-Rite,

but it is crazy. There were 50, 60 goal scorers in the league. Yeah, the league wide save percentage when he scored 92 goals, which I can't believe is a real sentence, was 878. And it's, you know, like 96 now or something. There's a goal more scored per game back then than now.

Which is odd. I know. Because usually as leagues develop, they try to keep offense, offense keeps growing. Yes. I used to look at this all the time. Let me pull it up here. The season average thing. Like don't you feel like if the hockey of the 80s existed

today, the NHL would be a lot more popular? Yes. Yes. I mean, heck, all the way through the 80s, there were almost four goals a game, per team, per game, and now it's under three. That's crazy. I mean, imagine if the average NFL team went from scoring 28 to 21 points in a game

over any stretch of time. You'd say that was crazy. But anyways, to my knowledge, Alexander Ovechkin's wife never hit in the face with a puck while he continued to play, and also never implicated in an FBI gambling scheme called Operation Slapshot. Did Gretzky also step in it here with Trump recently, or was he pro? Remember booing?

Well, he's a big Trump guy, and I listened to a couple reports, maybe one was the Daily or something, where this was putting Canadian people in quite the awkward position. Because it was the booing Canada, or Canada booing our national anthem, and Bucuretsky's there, and yeah.

I mean he's a national hero, and nobody is lower in the minds of Canadians right now than Trump. Or at least that's the way it's presented to us. Yeah. I don't know, I've just always... I've always had an obs... not obsession, but a fascination with Ovechkin. I used to have a shirt with one of his sayings on it. I think it was even a website. Ovechkin has sayings? Russian machine never break.

Like they would ask him, you know, because he's played an insane number of games and he's old and he still plays. Did anybody follow up with the Chernobyl or what the... That... Wasn't broken. User error. Okay. But yeah, Russian... I don't know if he actually said it or not, but it sounds like something a Russian would say machine never break Yeah, I just wanted to run through a couple from the beat farm a couple pretty generic ones here I do get a lot of emails from people that are what they call beat adjacent Like last week talking about a cop walking up on you and you're at like make out point, you're all naked.

That's not really a beat, but it's from the same makers of which is just sexual shame. And I've never been in that spot, but I did get a couple listeners that are like, man. Well, when you say sexual shame, we all, I think can relate to that. In one way or another. Uh, yeah, because there was a guy who emailed me and said that, uh, in high school, him and his girlfriend,

when they would, uh, you know, do it in his bedroom, he would go to the bathroom and he would come back and he would do, like, his mom's voice. Like, Derrick, I'm up here. Like, to scare his girlfriend, but she clearly knew it was him. And then one time, it wasn't him. And she was just naked in his bed, on top of the covers, and his mom, she's like laughing like, yeah. Because she's like, Derek.

It's just the mom. Said I'm 51. I remember it like it was yesterday. This is a wild one. Do you remember a few weeks back when Blake was bitching about his printer? Yeah, run the ball guy was upset. Yeah, and now he has to subscribe for ink.

Yeah. He was gonna cancel it. I never heard of that. So this guy, this made him think of that. He said, like most late 90s households, we had one family computer and printer in a common area. I wasn't as bold as Blake to pull down my pants in a room without a door, so my hack was to print out pictures from E-bombs world and college humor.

Take him to my room. This very quickly drained all the color ink. I kept going to my mom to explain how I had to have color ink for school, but she complained how expensive it was and wanted to know what projects I needed it for well crunch time comes when Brooke Burke Star of Wild on poses for Playboy. I found some homemade scans of the physical magazine and started printing But we are completely out of yellow and is it cyan or C and it's blue folks We are completely out of yellow and is it cyan or sea? It's blue, folks. We do have magenta,

so I'm just getting red outlines of the pictures. I'm desperate, so I keep printing as the magenta begins to run dry and begins to get more faint. I run to my room and finish my business, and I remember the moment of clarity, realizing that I just beat off to just extremely faint squiggly lines.

Like scenario, I hope you have fun with this data. But that like the post-clarity where you're looking at it, I mean, sometimes you look at it and you're like, this is disgusting, I can't believe this was just playing in front of my eyes. Let me ask though. But then if you look down and it's just like a squiggly busted half ink cartridge thing of lines at some point you're like having a what have I become moment. Okay well I was gonna ask the definition of bad beat here because I get it when Blake's mom walks in on him

and he's pants around his ankles and he's in the laundry room because that's where the home computer was. But if it's if we're just dealing with things that like certainly as a young man I have paused a cable TV station or you know recorded it first and then paused it on the VHS tape where you can kind of see a boob in Animal House when the chick's jumping out of the back of the car when they were at the bar and they were playing Shout. So I've paused it there.

I mean, at the time. At the perfect time, but is that a bad beat? It was not. It was not. It was great. Today? Because I caught it perfect. It might be like, oh.

But it's the same as, you know, oh, I used my mom's Sears catalog or something. I've done it. But I don't consider that a bad beat. I think like, for example. Now, she caught me. In this guy's case. That's bad.

Had you had simply a torn out page of that Sears catalog and you just had like the legs that's a bad beat okay this guy was trying to print a picture of Brooke Burke and all he got was squiggly magenta lines he didn't get the picture of his head was already in the game yeah yeah so I mean if you're if you had like an eye like her face was torn off and you just had one eye and you're like this is gonna have to work That's a bad beat This guy I was preparing for my you're the rule keeper I was preparing for my eighth grade Valentine's dance in 99. I needed to get the evil out. I

Pulled up the tape of strip poker episodes which we've talked about before the show that would come on like CW 33 As I'm approaching my ultimate goal I rise from my seat for a better look when my mom walks in and we lock eyes before she quickly backs out. As if that weren't bad enough I had some stomach bug and had to be picked up by my mom two hours into the dance as we rode home in silence and shame. We only had to pull over the wind star twice for me to vomit. My mom would die unexpectedly about six months later. Hopefully this didn't lead to the brain aneurysm.

Thanks for bringing it up." Man, lock an eye with your mom in that situation. And then my last one here. Just getting caught. I've never done it. By anyone. I've my last one here. Just getting caught. I've never done it. By anyone. I've never had it happen. It sounds as bad as it could ever get.

It feels like the only, it feels like when a human being most resembles a dog that's taking a dump. Where it's embarrassed by it and it's kind of, its legs are all weird and it's looking around. Are dogs, cause I think that, am I projecting on him? Maybe. Or they look embarrassed. Is he actually, yeah.

So I try to look away. So do I. I'll let you have your privacy. And then our last one here, I think this is gonna land for a lot of people. And I didn't pull it image, but if you're able to pull it up Clayton. This guy says, when I was 13, I was obsessed

with getting to play a computer game called Leisure Suit Larry. Does anyone else remember Leisure Suit Larry? It was a computer game, but you were like, it was almost like an early version of The Sims, but you were like a swingin' singles guy who would nail chicks. Really? of The Sims, but you were like a swinging singles guy who would nail chicks.

Really? Yeah, it was like an adult comedy sex-themed game and there were nudes in it. It was basically like you were Quagmire, you know what I mean? He was just some old creepy guy. And they made like four or five versions of it. He said, I never got to play, but the fact that it was a computer game with naked women

was a very big deal back in the day. Would love to hear if you've heard of this game. And I certainly had. I think there are a lot of people out there who were trying to find a friend who could get a hold of Leisure Suit Larry. There it is. The PlayStation version. Yeah, magna cum laude. I believe that was

when Leisure Suit Larry went to college. The whole point of the game was just to drink and nail chicks. Yeah, those... see, this is my point too. Those chicks are really hot. That's way better than any Sears catalog that I've ever had. No, but I think the deal here would be you have to figure out how to convince someone to get you a computer game that's not, you know, bubble pop. You ever get attracted to a mannequin? Oh yeah. Yeah. Oh yeah. They don't really make mannequins with my preferred proportions though. They make them very skinny now. I know.

Way, way skinny. So shout out to Leisure Suit Larry and there are some beats for you. J-K-E-M-P-A-D-A-D-A-D-G-M-A-L.com. You are the guy, the keeper of the bad beat. Mm-hmm. You are the guy, the keeper of the bad beat. I'll just end email with a quickie. Robert is holding out hope for the year of Jake.

He says, you're likely aware that many organizations have fiscal years that do not match the calendar year. If NoPuppetProductions were to set their fiscal year to start in, say, March or April, have fiscal years that do not match the calendar year. If No Puppet Productions were to set their fiscal year to start in say March or April, this could be the fiscal year of Jake. Uh, certainly possible. It doesn't feel fiscal or otherwise, like this is really my year.

The Luca thing is gonna set me back a long time. That's a thing. And the Cowboys won't win the Super Bowl until next year. With Joe Milton III dealing. While we wait for Jared Sandler, are we waiting for Jared Sandler? Okay. I'll check the texts. We can tell you about Lucy.

Lucy is... I got a Lucy on me to show off. The, what do you call it? Nicotine pouch. That's right. Tobacco free. I was thinking in my head tobacco, but that's what we're trying to get rid of.

Yeah. And Lucy has done that. And they're not owned by Big Tobacco either. So sometimes you're using these tobacco-free products and you're like, oh cool, I'm not supporting Big. No, you actually are. You are. They are the mom and pop store of pouches.

They're the dumb zone of nicotine pouches. That's right. Because they have a little extra surprise in there. You never know what you're gonna get with them. The Breaker. The Lucy Breaker give you a little extra flavor, a little extra surprise in there. You never know what you're gonna get with it. The Breaker. The Lucy Breaker give you a little extra flavor, a little extra juice in there, 100% pure nicotine. I got our friend Mike Saroi to try a few Lucy's on our trip.

He is a convert. Big fan of the morning Lucy. Get yourself your coffee, get to work there. Dude, I love the one you gave me the other day. It had like, what's the level? 12 or? Yeah, they make some big boys for the regular people. Or just one little guy.

And it used to be you'd have to have a mouthful of chew for that. And then you'd be spitting all over the place. What about one little pouch? And there you go. You're feeling it. You are feeling it. So get yourself some breakers at lucy.co slash dumb zone use the promo code dumb

zone to get 20% off your first order Dan's right these are it's always right these are a better quality you've smoked like maybe you haven't but you've had like regular big-box dip or smokes before they're gross mm-hmm they're gross they're mass-produced dirty yeah kind of. Lucy.co slash dumb zone. Use promo code DUMBZONE, you'll get 20% off your first order. And here comes the fine print. What's so fine about it? Awesome.

Lucy products are only for adults of legal age, and every order is age verified. Warning, this product contains nicotine. Nicotine is an addictive chemical. Yeah, bro. Good for a baseball game. He said at 12.57. Oh.

We got a problem on the home front, boys. What do you got going? Got a sick kid, and he's got the flu. Oh no. He's got the test back. Ah! I feel like before COVID, I had never heard of a flu test. Well, it's probably the flu.

He's got the fever. But there was never like, I'm going to go to the doctor and confirm with a swab. This is the flu. The strep test, right? Now they do strep and flu test. Oh, okay. And we got an email Friday that said somebody in the class probably had it, and then last night he seemed

kinda weird, this morning he seemed real weird. I actually don't know that I've ever had a kid with the flu. I don't think I've ever had the flu. And for most of my life I haven't done the shot. I have the last few years though. I think I did once. Because I remember it kept me out of the ticket

for like two days. And I had not missed a day of work in 18 years or something like that. Hey. Yeah. Tenance is a bit of an issue. That's all right, I mean that's who I am. But that actually.

Yeah, it's not ideal. My wife is leaving town tomorrow morning for the rest of the week. We have the Lakers game on Wednesdays. Oh, dear. We'll figure it out. All right, I'm going to start talking to Ray. Can you cryogenically freeze your kid for like two days?

Does that work? Yeah, yeah, talk me through it. Do you think there's a future where we'll be able to do that? For the flu. Would you be able to do that? For the flu. Would you be able to cry? You're slowing down all the body, but then you can just get well in that, in some kind of a suspended state.

Like a medically induced coma. Yeah. And we just, for the flu. And then you don't have to deal with the person, and they won't be infecting, and because everything is slowed down. I wonder if that would slow down the healing too. It's something to work on.

It's kind of like Pregnancy Island. Yeah, but if it's- But it could be stored locally. Anyways, the Rangers are eight and two. And as Letty reminded us, I think it was Letty. I hope everybody got some sweep sex last night. Yeah, the Letty crew with the bus. He says if there's ever,

their wives all know. He says he's here whenever. That there will be a ranger's, there will be rangers, there will be sex if the rangers sweep. Jared's here or no? He says he's here. Oh, okay.

Well, I'll wait for Clayton to let me know that. I had my Victory Plus up yesterday on one screen and then my Stars on the other screen because they were on national TV and then my Lakers on the other screen. So how about this? Jared's going to give some trivia in a little bit to give away a pair of Rangers tickets to a future game. Lovely. But I also have some.

Did you see that the Rangers have the worst batting average in baseball at 192, but the most wins in baseball at eight, or at least in the American league. How are we feeling? You're not there? What would you like me to tell him? Oh, okay. There's been six teams in the history of baseball that won eight out of 10 games.

So, eight games in a 10 game span. Yeah. out of 10 games so 80 point eight games in a 10 game span yeah with a team batting average of 192 or worse the Rangers just did that six other teams have ever done that ever four of them went to the World Series that year. Damn. I mean, it does feel like if you could have it that way or the other, right? Like if you said only six teams ever have gone eight and two with a six plus ERA through 10 teams, you'd be like, oh.

So is that the indicator? Like, boy, they must have been getting some great pitching during that 10 game span. And great pitching is what you really want? I would think so. I would think so. I would think so. I spent a lot of time going through their first 10 games and how real it is or not.

I mean, they've got like a plus one or minus one run differential, I'm pretty sure. They're five and 0 in one run games. Well, wasn't the Reds series, they were outscored 14 to 5, and they won the series, two games to one. I think he is here Hello Jared wait for Clayton, but I'm going to welcome Jared with this African-American man. Jared Saylor, you are an incredible baseball fan. All right, yeah, kind of a Boston's feel to it. That is awesome. Unfortunately, it's not done. We just want to hear what you have to say, which we all consider not gay. Hey, Jared, we're all stupid Shoot us in our baseball hearts like cupid

Keep us entertained, until the fall God, every little thing is so bad Jared Sandler, super smart African-American man Jared Sandler, you are an incredible baseball fan Oh, it's quite abrupt. A little abrupt. We got a sponsor for Jared this week. It's underdog fantasy sports. Fitting. Or is it?

Do we call this fantasy sports? Yeah, I think so. Anyway, it's very cool. It's like our new sponsor, underdog and what you do is you go on there and you will pick it's kind of like a parlay game. So you pick a couple of different at least two players and you pit them against each other and you are picking what they do in a certain game. So for for instance, yesterday I picked Luka, and they asked you, do you want to go higher or lower on points, rebounds, and assists? You could pick just assists. You could pick some stat. It doesn't matter. But, so you pick the player you want, and it said 42.5 points rebounds and assists added up, higher or lower?

I picked higher. And then because I think SGA is overrated, especially if you are rating him ahead of Luka Doncic, I put him head to head with Luka. They said his points rebounds and assists, 43.5, I picked lower on him and higher on Luka, and add up Luka Lucas box score from yesterday. You got 30 points. So I had 42.5 and I said higher Okay, he scored 30 points. He had seven rebounds. What's that 37? plus six assists What is that? That is 43 and I said higher than 42.5 and I won.

Making some money. With underdog. What's the website and stuff? What's the website and stuff? Well, I'd like to direct you to the app, the underdog app. And then you sign up and I got a promo code for you. It is TMD. TMD to unlock a special offer of up to $1,000

in bonus cash, go check it out right now. Underdogfantasy.com or download the app and use promo code TMD to have some wagering fun like Dan did. And I think I'll be doing this, actually I already did it tonight for the Rangers. I got a Simeon home run, which we could use right now Jared Oh, did I did I miss that?

You must be 18 plus 19 plus in Alabama and Nebraska 19 plus in Colorado for some games 21 plus in Massachusetts in Arizona and present in a state where underdog fantasy operates terms apply concerned with your play call 1-800 gambler or visit operates. Terms apply. Concerned with your play, call 1-800-GAMBLER or visit npcgambling.org in Arizona. Call 1-800-NEXT-STEP or text NEXTSTEP to 53342. In New York, call the 24-7 HOPE line at 1-8778-HOPE-NY or text HOPE-NY. All right. Right? Yeah, yeah. I was just off top of my head. Okay. Conversationally. All right, Jared, we're out. I was just off top of my head. Okay. Conversationally. All right, Jared, we're out of time.

Thanks for joining us. See you guys. Hey, thanks so much. A lot of fun. Eight and two, bro. Hey, what about that? Do you know about sweep sex? That's the first thing you can work into the broadcast.

Okay. I'd hate to say no to the very first suggestion, but I think I'm entitled to after waiting about a month. I needed your help to get me through spring training games and you didn't deliver. So I, I, I, yeah. I did not know about that. I, I needed, I need to make sure I tell my wife about that for future opportunities. Yeah, look, this season might be, uh, might be fruitful.

Five Oh and one run games. Um, so I don't know where you want to start. Dan said it there. They have the top ERA for starters in the pager leagues, which is crazy. Uh, the bullpen's done enough. So you take it where you want. Well, I'll start with, you know, I heard Dan talk about the low batting average and that obviously can't sustain, right? That's not, you're not winning eight out of 10 games. You're not winning six out of 10 games with a batting average hovering around 200.

But, and I'm not an anti batting average guy, but I am a there's more to life than batting average. And the Rangers had not gotten a lot of hits, but a pretty high percentage of their hits have gone for home runs. And so the other day they beat Tampa despite getting out hit 10 to four, but three of their four hits were home runs, including Wyatt Langford's Homer in the seven. So it's not like they're, you know, the you know the the bomb squad by any means yet but they are doing a good job of I shouldn't say good job it's not like they're strategically allocating their hits between singles doubles triples and homers but they have hit the home run

ball and that was a point of emphasis was being able to do that last year because last year they weren't hitting either but they also weren't hitting nearly as many home runs. And now I'll just segue to where I'm sitting right now, which is the press box at Wrigley field where the Rangers have only hit one home run in their last seven games here and it is currently snowing. So the Rangers might play the coldest game in franchise history tonight based on game time temp with chances of game time temperature hovering around 32,

33 degrees. Wow. And tonight's an E of all the night, right? It is. Yeah. And he's actually got a little bit of experience pitching in this type of weather. And he's been, as you can imagine, good. I asked him yesterday if he likes it.

And most pitchers say they do like pitching in the cold because they feel like they've got the advantage. The one challenge sometimes is a grip. You know, you get cold and you lose. You don't have like the sweat and you don't have the ability to grip the ball. But they got ways around that and he loves it. The numbers back it up. He said success pitching in cold weather games and the Rangers in the last like 30 years

have played three games sub 40 game time, and they're actually two in one, including their most recent one, which was 2013 here at Wrigley Field. Derek Holland went seven shut out. Adrian Beltre, who's celebrating a birthday today, had a double into Homer. So in a very abbreviated history of cold weather games, two of which, by the way, were in Arlington, oddly enough, the Rangers have had success. So how do you like doing the pregame and all that kind of stuff now? It's been fun.

It's fun when they win, obviously. You know, they go through a two and eight stretch, which will invariably happen at some point this year. It might be a little more challenging, but it's been a blast. You know, I feel like so far, and I would love if, you know, any DFs listening feel otherwise, or watching as well, I feel like,

and maybe I said this to you guys a couple weeks ago, anything we do either needs to be fun and entertaining or informative, and hopefully in some cases both. And I feel like so far we've done a good job of that. Like yesterday Dave Raymond and I well after the game Saturday we raced he called me short I called him old so we decided to challenge one another to a race and then we looped that into just the Rangers base running in general which by the way they've stolen three or more bases in

three straight games for the second time in franchise history so that's actually been baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players,

baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players,

baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball players, baseball I raced, yeah. Yeah, we raced. Yeah, we raced after the game Saturday. We played it then yesterday. It was odd because we didn't know how we were going to do it, like a time trial or race at the same time. And so what we decided was I would run the opposite way. Dave would run the traditional way where you make left turns.

I made right turns and we ran at the same time, hopefully avoiding a collision, which we were able to do. You ran the bases. All the bases. Not just the down one. Okay. Well, what was the result? I won... Dave's 18 years older than I am, allegedly. Well, that's what you're saying when you started this. Yeah. So but now he he was a college track athlete. He was a long jumper and a triple jumper, but he's got track and field experience. Yep. And he's in good shape.

But I won. Maybe could have pushed it a little bit more. I was, you know, I was just happy to come away with that injury. But yeah, I took gold, Dave got silver. So this is like Charles Barkley versus Dick Bavetta. Remember that? I remember that. Yeah, I mean, it was Dick Bavetta fall during that race. He did. He did. It was such a resounding win and Jared was so like feeling himself when I watched it that I honestly thought it was like Ozzie Smith back flip time.

He was just rubbing it in Dave's face. Yeah. He's an old guy. Like you're well ahead of him. I don't know if this is that. And running opposite has to be difficult. Yeah. Yeah, that was weird.

After the race, Dave went for a handshake and I just, I did one of these like the John Cena and then I crotch chopped him. Yeah. And then my entourage walked away from Dave. I just, I did one of these like the John Cena, and then I crotch chopped him. Yeah. And then my entourage walked away from Dave. You know, it just, the rivalry is just at an all time high. Yeah, okay.

You know, you doing this so early in the season too, like you're gonna have to keep up in the game. Like for bits. Well, you know, it was organic, right? I mean, it was organic, right? So what happened was last Sunday, all the kids running the bases are in the background and Dave made a joke on air about how he couldn't find me because I was blending in with all the kids running the bases, which, you know, that's all good.

And then I decided to hit him with the fact that he doesn't have a hair that's not gray and called him an old man. And then naturally there was a challenge but I'm I'm open to hey, I thought about tonight like I've got one of the things you might do for pregame is I might share like three facts To help get you ready like a news and note segment and maybe I shed a layer with each fact Because why why should I care about the cold weather? You know, let's just keep doing this. It's 33 degrees who cares care about the cold weather. You know, let's just keep doing this. It's 33 degrees. Who cares? So I don't know if we can play this or not Clayton, but after opening day, I sent you a text

and that was a blown save for Luke Jackson. His only, right? I don't think it was a blown save though. It wasn't a blown save. Oh, it was an L? Yeah. Somebody else's runner was on, right? Okay. Or, oh, it was a loss. Yeah. It was a tie game. Oh, it was an L? Yeah. Somebody else's runner was on, right? Okay. Or... Oh, it was a loss. Yeah. It was a tie game.

Yeah, it was a tie game. Right, because he's five for five. Yeah, last five. So, I'm watching his intro video, and of course, I'm thinking of, hey, there's a guy with a tiny trumpet, and how crazy the crowd goes up in Queens. And I don't really know anything about Luke Jackson. You know, he's not a guy that I thought was gonna be their closer.

So as I'm seeing his intro video, I'm like, what the hell am I watching? Like at first I thought it was church, but like the lights kinda come down, watch this, Dan. The lights kinda come down and it's like darker, but then there's flashing lights. Can you play the sound at all? It looks like... So I thought this was a church song but apparently it is Madonna.

It is what? Like a prayer? And it was popularized in a battle scene in the movie Deadpool and Wolverine. Ah, okay. And so at first I'm like, this is lame, it seems like it's just such a soft, but then when you watch the scene, it actually, you don't get the beat droppy type thing, but it is really cool.

Would it be like you coming out to Jurassic Park or something? Yeah, yeah, but with lights. And it just looks really, really cool in the stadium. And now that he's dealing, when I saw a video of it yesterday, I'm like, that's actually pretty cool. The bullpen's been incredible, hasn't it?

Yeah, yeah. Bullpen's been really good. Now, they've been playing all these close games, and so they gotta make sure they're not overworking these guys. Yesterday, they won a close game, but Martin, Darcy, and Jackson They've been playing all these close games and so they got to make sure they're not overworking these guys like yesterday They they won a close game that Martin Darcy and Jackson were probably all unavailable But yeah, I love it Jake. So here's the deal

He like seven in the morning one day in spring training he walks into the clubhouse with a boombox just blast in this song and He's like, what do you think? What do you guys think? He's like going and asking like all his teammates and he's just walking around with a boombox carrying it or it's on his shoulder. And I just it was like seven in the mornings. I didn't think much of it. But when I first heard it, I loved it.

Now I have one issue and it's not his fault. It's the choir version of the song. And when it ends, you're right. There's not like, it seems like it's building up to some beat drop moment, but it's not. And then they have like Chris Statser, who's the DJ just plays like the actual version of like a prayer, which I don't know what else he would do. He can't make it silent, but I wish that like someone could come up with a version of that, that at the end of it, like a beat drops

and it just like, it's a banger at Globe Life Field. Cause that to me would make it perfect. I'm cool with, if you wanna try go like classic, intimidating, welcome to the jungle, hell's bells, like stuff that's been done. But like, I also think much like Edwin Diaz's deal, like if you do something zany, if it fits you, like perfect. I'm just glad, I love Kirby Yates, he was awesome.

But the Bob Marley, like, everything's good, don't worry, be happy or whatever, like that just didn't juice me up, right? But the Like a Prayer choir mix, like that kind of gets me going, I'm not gonna lie. Yeah, no, it does get me going. Both could be taken a little bit sideways. Like I don't want a reliever who's like listening to Bobby McFerrin.

No, it's not going to be all right. Not if you get rocked here. But also you could say like a prayer is not what I want my, uh, my clothes are rolling with either, but it looks really cool. It looks really cool in the stadium. And it fits his personality. Luke Jackson, you guys would find fascinating by the way. Like he's one of these, he's super eclectic. He's a perfect closer and that, you know, he, every closer has got something, right? Like there, there might anger management issues maybe, or like Mariano Rivera was like way too calm, like something, what's going on here? Uh,

yeah. I mean the Rangers have had coaches in the past who have, you know, have a lot going on. Yep. And you there's, you know, rocker my homes like a John rocker for a little bit. Uh, but I think you're thinking of wetlands or whatever. No, no, no. I was going to drive by wetland. Okay. Uh, it doesn't exist. It doesn't exist. And we do Rangers hall of fame stuff, but uh, uh, Luke Jackson is just super eclectic. He's like, his dad was this like super successful businessman. So I think he's like traveled a lot around

the world. I know he spent a lot of time in London and he loves artwork and loves hockey and that, but like he wears these like very artistic, baggy sweatpants and hoodies with graphics. He is super eclectic and choosing a Madonna choir remix is the most Luke Jackson thing. That's awesome. I'm sold now on the closer. That's what I want. Boy, an original Ranger, huh? He was a Ranger a decade ago.

He was. He was a part of a group of prospects who were supposed to be the next chapter, but they all ended up getting traded. Most of them got traded in the Cole Hamels deal. Alfaro, Jake Thompson, Jared Eickhoff, Alec Asher. Luke Jackson was like the last man standing and he just, it wasn't working for him. And so the Rangers ended up moving him for not a whole lot And then he left the Rangers and started kind of maturing and figuring things out

How does this work? He's five for five and save opportunities He's got a negative point one war right now for this season Um, I mean that's gonna be pretty much one loss is that bad Yeah, that's gonna that's pretty much one loss. Is that bad? Yeah, that's going to, that's going to carry a lot of weight. Yeah. Ton of, ton of it doesn't help.

I think they fill in the most innings of any relievers in the American league. The Rangers. Yeah. Second most, which is, I guess all the more surprising that they're good because this is a totally revamped bullpen. Yeah. You got to figure, they're in the market for an arm, right? Yeah. In one of those arms, I'd be in triple A right now, guys.

I mean, Emiliano Teodó, I don't want to say is their second chance at Emmanuel Classe because he doesn't have like a hundred and one mile an Hour cutter, but he does throw a hundred with sink got a really good slider That there I think they I don't say they've moved on they're not really using him like a starter I mean he was last year But they are making him a multi inning reliever And so maybe he comes up and he's not the closer right away, but a multi inning weapon but that's that's one guy who they've got a handful of arms in the minors who should

be able to help you know plug a hole here maybe fill a need there. But like in terms of a guy you want pitching valuable innings in the playoffs. Emiliano Teodoto very very well could be a guy who is pitching critical outs for you down the stretch and in the playoffs. And then, yeah, I imagine they're going to try and add an arm once we get closer to the trade deadline. Most teams that are vying for a postseason berth do. I mean, it just very rarely does a team have a perfect bullpen.

And the Rangers certainly will likely make some ads between now and the deadline. You got anything else? No, I was gonna ask if he wants to do some trivia. Yeah, let's hit away some tickets. We're gonna make this Jared's trivia today and maybe every week will be brought to us by Lone Star Beer where you can get Lone Star Beer at Globe Life Field in section 101 at a Rangers game. About time, but it's here now.

Says here, the National Beer of Texas Baseball. What are they called? Yeah. The Texas Rangers. That makes sense. Lone Star Beer. You can get some sweet merch like this shirt. Would you like to look like me? Well, go to lonestarbeer.com.

Dumb Zone 21. Well... What? Nothing. You want to look just like me. I do. Yeah. At least you could have your outfit look like me.

Get a Lone Star Beer hat. Don't want to pay full price though. No, 21% off the merch. Hit us. I was just trying to kill time letting Jared think of a trivia question, because certainly he hasn't. So how are we giving away this trivia? Are we doing it just for the chat this week?

Yes. Yes. Because we're live streaming right now, supposedly. I don't know why he keeps saying that. What? I don't know why he keeps doing this. Allegedly. What? I don't know. Clayton just looks at every you. Let's just move on.

It'll be in the chat and then Clayton will communicate and then you will email your username to thedumbzone at gmail.com. So let's play trivia. All right. Now I sent you guys the question for approval yesterday. Do you want? Oh, no. You have to name four.

I got to unblock Jared from my phone. Hold on. What was it? Four or let me go back to the exact. Six. So the question is in honor of, okay, let's just do four, make it simple. All right, here's the question. There are 12 former Rangers who have had a 40 home

run season and won a gold glove. Not necessarily in the same season, but at some point in their career they had a 40 home run season and they also won a gold glove. There are 12. Name four or name all 12. But if you name four, then we deem you to be the winner. Does Omar Vizquel have 40 home runs in his entire career? I bet he does. Let's check that out. He certainly won a gold glove or two, right? I know one. Can I just give one away? Yeah, he's got 80 career hummers. I'm going to give one away.

One is Rafi. You make the rules. And it was that year, he won the gold glove in a year where he played dh like 150 games and he won a gold glove at first base do you remember that boy jared i don't remember that jared that's not surprising and jake jared will just be employed by whatever team gives him money not me i want to work for a team that i love and i grew up rooting for that's right yeah that's definitely yeah don't, I don't fit that. Unfortunately, despite years of pain as a ranger.

So I know I don't remember. I do remember that the gold glove used to basically be the best hitter who was like semi competent defensively at that position. So that would make sense. Yeah. Rafi is one of them. Correct. So there I've given you one. Now people just have to have three. How about that for excitement? All right, well, it's the third time for E of Aldi tonight. A nice bounce back from Rocker yesterday. Times

are good. Times are good. And we'll talk to you next week. Lay off the elder abuse. I don't know. You see if Eric Nadel wants to do bench press or something. Is there anybody else you want to go mess around with? All right, there goes Jared. Here's Jed with the Dumb Zone News. So. I think we're doing this now.

Another day, another story about measles. A couple stories about measles actually, as we had a second death due to measles, and this one was also in Texas. RFK Jr. went to the funeral over the weekend. Really? Mm- weekend. Really? Mm-hmm. Why? Well, because he's the director of Health and Human

Services and we're having a, I don't know if you'd call it an outbreak, but people haven't died from measles in a very long time and now we have Gaines County out in West Texas, pretty much the whole area from Lubbock to Odessa. They're having a little outbreak, a little, an outbreak eat though. So he did like a live, I did this, like it'd be like Biden standing at the pump pointing at the, you know, what's really interesting about that is, uh, okay.

So we all know his history with vaccines. And so he visited the area where there's an outbreak. He went to the second kid's funeral. But he also tweeted like, hey, you need to get a vaccine. He had a long tweet about it which included, in early March I deployed a CDC team to bolster local and state capacity for response, supply pharmacies and Texas run clinics with needed MMR vaccines and other medicines. Later he says the most effective way to prevent the spread of measles

is the MMR vaccine. Now what do you think happened then? Well, a significant portion of the Maha movement, they feel they've been betrayed. A couple of the big Maha influencer accounts that I see, they have like a million followers, like he's been taken over by Big Pharma, like he's been co-opted, the movement has been jacked.

Just cause he went down there and you know, instead of saying, eh, you know, don't take the easy. I don't think I can find that view. I'm just saying, I'm strapped a whale to the top of my arm. Anyways. Yeah, second death there. And what's more, Tarrant County issued an exposure notice this weekend because they say there were two,

or a family of individuals with the Mezees that visited two grapevine venues, Grapevine Mills and the Great Wolf Lodge. Jesus, what are we doing here? Well, they didn't know. They didn't know? Well, yeah. Well, they knew they didn't get the backs. Correct. At least my kid doesn't have that, right? Is that the power of positive thinking? Doesn't right now.

Do you die from the measles? Oh yeah, obviously you do. There's a couple people that did. You don't definitely die though, right? No. Okay, so you can't, it's just like a good chance like what's the chance? You know what it probably varies Significantly based on age. What are the odds my kid dies from measles? He is smart. So he didn't get the vaccine All right, whatever. You pussy. Same thing. Vaccinate. This thing's just a government, this thing is just a government shill. The chat GPT? Yeah. What does it say? To get the

kid vaccinated. Okay. Yeah. Can't believe that. Uh. It does say that about one in two from a thousand will die from measles if you don't get a vaccine. What was the... what do you think the number was on COVID? That's a lot. One in a thousand is higher than what was COVID, right? You know it was like a million people? I think a lot higher. Yeah. Let's see here. Oh, this nearly wrecked Dan's world.

It's crazy how this works. So we all got a lot of bad bits on April 1st. Chief among them, LT Gray, saying that his Achilles had miraculously healed and he would now be playing in the the Masters blah blah blah I still don't want to believe that was a bit. Oh boy Can you imagine how great it we should keep a list just keeping track over the next handful of years how many April fools? jokes Dan falls for Well one of them that was posted by a website called ProTool Reviews.

I don't think this is a website that reviews the recording software ProTools, but it is a tool review website. Like Wieners? Yeah. That'll work. Of the pro variety. Yeah. Cooper Flags Penis.

Porn Star. Yeah, there you go. This one's big. So on ProToolReviews.com they posted something on April 1st that caused quite the tizzy. They posted on April 1st that Home Depot will now begin charging customers for parking. Now, there's a lot going on here. One- So yeah, is Home Depot mad that they were inadvertent? Like if Home Depot tweeted it, it'd be one thing.

Home Depot's very mad. Yeah, I was gonna say, like Pro Tool Reviews does, it's, you could've picked, why didn't you pick Lowe's? And see, the weird thing about it is, on one hand, Home Depot, you think like, oh, we're safe, we know the guys at Pro Tool Reviews, they're no jokesters. Yeah. And then Pro Tool Review'd think like, oh, we're safe. We know the guys at Pro Tool Reviews. They're no jokesters. Yeah.

And then Pro Tool Reviews is like, you know what people have been missing from Pro Tool Reviews comedy? That's right. And the whole thing gets thrown out of whack. Maybe Anthony Davis had stopped by and gave him an idea. That's right. The article detailed fake fees.

Also included incentives for shoppers to bypass the parking fee. It was basically an onion article. And people freaked out on Twitter for whatever that's worth. That's the thing. What is this all worth? Did anyone actually say, I'm going to go to Lowe's today because I saw that thing? Well, it was enough to where Home Depot put out a statement. This was an April Fool's joke that Pro Tool Reviews posted without our knowledge. We don't change parking lot,

or we don't charge parking lot fees and we do not plan to. Ah, but they kept it open. They didn't say we never will. That's a good point. Said we don't plan to. The official Home Depot account was also busy replying to users on Twitter.

I mean, this could have been the end of Home Depot walking. I was going to say, though, at least they're not charging for just walking around their vast stores. Right, for just exploring. Although I kind of get charged, I feel bad. I think I've bought something every time I've done the Home Depot walk. Maybe just a little, you know, you could always use a little weed killer. So even if I'm kind of stocked up now, I'll just get another one now.

Dude, I saw one of the, depends on how you look at it, most depressing or inspiring things ever the other day when I was on, I was either on Door Dash or Uber Eats and I dead-ass for at least five seconds considered you can order a pickup hot dog I think you could probably get it delivered from Lowe's or Home Depot. Do you love those hot dogs? Holy shoot they're so good that's like a grandpa cookout sausage right there. And I was like, who's doing that? Who's dashing a hardware hot dog?

You should do it. I feel like you would do that. And I feel like I might. Yeah. I feel like I might. So no parking there. Let's see here. So no parking there. Let's see here.

Oh, today's news brought to you by Frankel and Frankel, personal injury attorneys. Did you know that? No, I didn't know that, but I do now. If you end up in a situation where... I was playing along. Do you think everybody knew that we had a run sheet? Yeah, so Franco and Franco, yeah, if you get injured, auto accident.

That's one of their specialties. They know that you might have to get in a fight with the insurance company to kind of get what you deserve. And that's where they come in. Let's say you're in an auto accident with a car full of measles. Ooh. You want to handle that on your own?

You don't. I want to stay away from that. 214, 817, and then all threes. Why are the insurance companies bad in so many ways? What? They're messing you up when you got your roof messed up. Why can't we deport them? Yeah, deport the insurance companies.

Thank you, Frankl, for helping us. That's what he's trying to say. Yeah. Two dead, one injured in a suspected murder, suicide in Dallas. And I only do this headline because you don't hear it often. Yeah. This is a shame.

It is in the sense that the the assailant is dead. That 35 year old William Calderon, he got himself done. But one of the... Always a dude, right? Yeah. Like if it's a lady killing your children, she doesn't kill herself too. She's just like, it was these f'ing kids. Like they're kind of logical. Whereas the dude always is like, ah, nobody could survive without me. I'm gonna kill these people first and then kill myself. That is very egotistical. Well he was unable to complete the job on one of the women. A 54 year old woman named Maria Hernandez died at the

scene but another person was taken to the hospital in critical condition. Could you imagine that? Surviving that? That's a very unique situation and has died at the scene, but another person was taken to the hospital in critical condition. Could you imagine that, surviving that? It's a very unique situation. And did the guy think that she was dead? Yeah. Like before he? I mean, that says, you know.

Yeah, you got to play dead if you're involved in one of these things. I think I could do that. You could play dead? Like if there was a school shooting and you were in school, would you have just like laid under another body? Yeah, for sure. And then-

Not me, I'd have flawed him. If they came by and asked me like about my beliefs, I would have been like, pfft, you know. You tell me. Yeah. Ha. More of a, more of a, like a pray five times a day thing,

more of a don't eat this meat, more of a, what are we looking for? What do you need me to be? No, that's a. That would be a very difficult question. Yeah, get it right? Is that... did somebody at Columbine do that or what? I don't think that actually happened, but I definitely... that was the story.

I think it was maybe somewhat of an urban legend, but that made it back to my youth group real quick. And... Oh, so the legend is that they said I'm I believe Jesus Christ started singing open the eyes of my heart and like that's a good thing right yeah well I mean it's what you believe in so yeah I believe you're actually thinking about something that's a thing I'll be more useful out there. From the No Way file, in Wharton County, Texas, we had a rodeo over the weekend, Dan.

You ever just read a story from the weekend and you're like, tons of shit going on out there, huh? Just everywhere. Copen and I are having our suburban weekends, but there's guys like street racing and dying for measles. Well, they're also doing rodeos. And over the weekend, a 24-year-old man,

Dylan Grant, was set to write a bull name Commander. They just hired Wes Welker, did you see that? Cliff and Wes Welker together in the division. What does he do? Receivers, pretty sure he was with Mikey McDaniel the last couple years. Grant, 24 years old, was set to ride a bull named Commander that bull bucked him off and crushed him.

Immediately killed. He was a pro from Riverton, Wyoming. He'd been competing on this national circuit for a few years. Died doing what he loved. He did. That happened in Fort Worth? No.

It comes through Fort Worth. Where is Wharton County? Southeastern Texas. Oh. But he was a guy who, you know, people knew him here from the circuit. How many deaths per year do you think are on the rodeo circuit?

Hmm. Like if it was one, would they consider that too many and stop? It says one to two on average per year with several more riders suffering serious spinal or brain injuries. I mean, there's a lot of them going on. You know, this is not, well I guess you could say that about like college and high school football too, but it's not like it's just, hey there's an NFL game. There's like a million levels of rodeo. You throw a rock and you could

find one of those things. Yeah, I guess I wonder how many football deaths a year. Yeah. In all of organized football. Yeah, and how many are complete freak accidents. I don't know, but I mean, they do wear like, I don't know, it basically looks like a catcher's helmet now. And like a protective. The rodeo is woke.

They wear kind of a chest plate as well. But I mean, you know... Yeah, they're still not stopping the bull. I mean, it's mostly to prevent like if you fly forward in like concussion, you know, your head hits the bull's head. But like if you... It's not stopping you from... The bull stops on you., yeah regardless. Yeah, they should wear the big

like when the stars do the sumo guy bit Between periods, you know, you have to wear that big outfit That looks fun. Yeah Is it the stars of the maps? Oh Whatever, you know, I'm talking about. Yeah Is it the stars or the maps? Oh, whatever. You know what I'm talking about.

Yeah. It's crazy, man. I don't know. You've been to a rodeo before, haven't you? I have. I've been quite a few times. I don't exactly know the specifics of what he did, but my stepdad was very involved in it when my mom met him.

He was like cop rodeo bouncer guy. So I went with him a few times. We went to like the Nationals in Wyoming or some shit. I don't even, don't know why, but it's a fun time. If you can get past the whole animal cruelty thing. Which I can. Yeah, and it feels like you just don't wanna get involved in it.

You never thought that you would ride something, did you? No, I don't think I did, but I do think I thought I'd be hanging out around it. Do you think, did you rope a steer? No. But I mean, I have- Tie up its little legs? Plenty of family who can. Or could, I don't know.

Yeah, I mean I, you know, I was a little country gay boy. Like I wore like a black, I think I had a hat, like a black cowboy hat, a white dress shirt, and like starched Wranglers to my mom's wedding. Really? Yeah. Because that's like what the groom's party was wearing. We certainly have pictures of that somewhere. Of course. How old were you? eight AJ same. Yeah. Bolo tie? No, it was no bolo, but you you do it big over there Yeah, little country fairy boy, that's why you had country music Saturday, that's right. All right moment of silence for Dylan Grant

we had Country Music Saturday. That's right, all right. Moment of silence for Dylan Grant. Like I gotta bring the music down? I just wanted to see what you'd do about it if I called you off for a moment of silence, but that's the news for the day. The Dumb Zone News. Like and subscribe.

How come we haven't heard a lot of imitators on that? Does SNL do him? They should if they haven't. Like how easy is it? I'm not putting down your. No, mine's very bad, but I do think with time. Yeah, I think yours is very good is what I'm saying. Yeah, I think with time someone could get it down.

I don't think that's out of bounds. I wonder about that sometimes too. Like when people email us and they get really mad if Blake uses one of his slurs that I won't use, they don't seem, people don't get mad if you make fun of Greg Abbott being in a wheelchair. They don't get mad. It kinda seems like, you know, or if you're,

it just feels like it goes one way, but whatever. I don't wanna fight today. The slur world is an odd one. It's just, like even last week, you guys were saying the F word, or I heard the F word a lot. I was like, oh man, are these guys, they're worried about that word? We weren't saying, yeah.

But the F word is not the F word anymore. I grew up with one F word, and now there's another F word. That F word should have never been bad though. What does it really mean? But the four letter F word, now it's like if you heard your kid came home from school and got in trouble for saying that, you'd be like, oh good. Yeah, give me that one. It's that F word.

For sure. But I'm just confused here. Confused about the world. You know who can help you with that. I hope you were going to say Tito's handmade vodka. I was just gonna sponsor whatever's up next You know, we love having Tito's at our football watching parties America's favorite vodka for a reason is a spirit that knows how to focus on what's important So I Tito's comes in a standard bottle with a modest paper label

All you pay for is the high quality vodka inside. Well, I was talking with Saroy about Tito's just off the air this weekend. No way. Because he's... It's six times distilled until it's just right. Naturally gluten-free, mixes with just about anything from the smoothest martinis to the best Bloody Marys. We're fired up to be associated with a brand like Tito's because not only is it known for great vodka but for giving back by teaming up with nonprofits around the world to serve its communities and do good for dogs.

It is the vodka for dog people after all. Find your new favorite cocktail with Tito's by visiting Tito'sVodka.com. Distilled and bottled by Fifth Generation Incorporated Austin, Texas. 40% alcohol by volume. Distilled from corn. Copyright 2025. Crafted to be savored responsibly. It's Mule Sizzin' out here to Tito's. I have a couple of birthdays for today. I have Dear Coochie Charcuterie Consumer. It is my Colby Lewis birthday. Yeah, it sucks. My leaders are Amateur Sketches, The Keith of the dumb zone. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Clothes female, clothes male. More Dingu. More Jake's heroism.

Dingu will be there at the Byron Nelson. Shout out to fellow DF and occasional emailer, Mark Brasher. I'm pretty sure I worked for him in 2005. Yeah, I know him. My kids will wear their headphones in the car. Pretty sure he got me my VPN. Oh really? Yeah.

Anyway, that's from Carlos. Not at the table. You think that's his Jake from State Farm? By the way, it happened again over the weekend. Go on, I don't know what you mean. It's only black people that say like from State Farm to me. It happened at rehab. Oh, you feel like white people, when you say hi, I'm Jake, nobody...

Whites don't even flinch. They don't say from State Farm? So that's also the name of my three grandchildren, my three nephews, my son's best friend, but every time I tell a black person new my name, they're like, ha ha, like from State Farm. Is that because, is Jake from State Farm the only black Jake? It's at least the only Jake black people know. But is there another black Jake? Not that I'm aware of.

In famous people, whatever. No, and that is why- Is there a famous black Jake? And that is why, when we've talked to Stu from Rivian, his wife was a part of the change. That's why everyone was so confused when they left his name Jake when they made him black and ripped. It was weird. But this weekend I had to give someone in a customer service situation my name. Like from State Farm.

Yep. Yep, it's Dan, just like Ackroyd. I'm trying to look, I'm looking through NBABasketballReference.com if you just type in the first name of somebody, all the... Yeah, yeah. But none of these are famous enough for me to know. But a lot of them are 1949, 1950. Certainly those are.

Well, I'm going to take an educated guess. Oh, and Dear Phenomenon of come on and on. Of come on. Anyway, yesterday was my Bob Lilly minus Danny White plus Longhorn Demarvion overshown birthday. I was not woken up in that special way. On that day in 1962, the head nurse at Archer City General stood up, shoved all the other nurses aside, and said leave this one alone. Let's see, my leaders are Heart Attack Man, who I am currently leading by one in the top of the ninth.

Run the Ball Blake and Jake's Lakeside Picnic Table. More Shale, more Sarah Heppala, more Jasmine. Basically more uptops all around. Okay. From Mike, number 3516. Giving us the need more boobs. Sarah will be in here tomorrow. I'm not sure if she's gonna like sit here with her top off like this email is hoping for. We can ask. It is subscriber only show. It's a good point.

You know you could subscribe at patreon.com. What if she just takes it off because Copeland's here? That's a possibility. Has she ever seen anything this hot? So today is Monday, April 7th. This is a good day to open a baseball movie. On this day, The Bad News Bears was released in 1976. Please watch that movie now. Like I want you to just go watch the first five minutes of it. Just by myself though, I don't have to go through what you did.

You should not have your kid with you. Okay. If you are worried about today's version of the f-word yeah and Oh n-word has stay in power because he's still the same n-word that he was in 1986 when that movie came out 76 the n-word is absolutely in this movie. It doesn't have staying power. I mean, we can't. Well, no, I mean, it hasn't been supplanted by another N-word. Oh, right, yeah, okay, no, yeah.

Still on top of the N-word rankings. You will not. Is that N-word. Powerhouse. On this day in 1989, the movie Major League opened. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure.

I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure.

I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure.

I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. remember where I was. I remember what Friends House I was at. It's a good movie, don't you think? I was obsessed. I was obsessed with the second one.

So the fact that it could get better. Is Walt in the second one, Walt Goggins? No, he's in the third one. Okay. I never saw anything after him. Very weird. And on this day in 1993, the movie, Sandlot opened.

What the heck? How about that? How crazy is this? On this day in 1970... What about Ed? I don't have any information on Ed. Oh. Was he the monkey that played third base? With like Joey from Friends? Yeah. On this day in 1979 it was the earliest no-hitter in major league history Ken force of the Astros beat the brave six nothing 2.8 on IMDB feels a little harsh for Ed. Yeah We might need to watch Ed someday too

We need to start up a high-tea movie and then a sports movie, too Oh, I think it'd be funnier if we did a high-team movie and just a monkey movie of the month. You've got me That's a better idea Dunstan The list goes on It's okay. It was odd that on the same day three classic baseball movies all were released But on the same day so 1979 it was the earliest no-hitter in Major League history, then 1984, Jack Morris of the Tigers ties the record for earliest no-hitter as he beats Chicago 4-0.

Walk six. Walk six. If you're... If you kind of think the no-hitter might be kind of spare if you walk six, seems like... It's from a bygone era, for sure. And on this day in 1984, the Census Bureau reported that Los Angeles overtook Chicago as the nation's second city in terms of population, thereby teaching me why Chicago was called second city. Did you know?

Yeah, I don't know. SCTV. I don't think I ever put together like, oh, okay, of course it's just not New York. I do know that now. Chicago population, steady decrease, right? Yeah, I believe. I would like to move to there.

You want to move somewhere where it's decreasing instead of increasing? Well, I just think there's an opportunity for us here, right? If everybody wants to move here, and I always wanted to move and live in another big city but I'm not moving here who we kidding I don't even know what to do with my kid has flu and I've got seven in-laws here I think I'm gonna handle that up there I want to move up there so that my TV always works because of the wind yeah wind is always

blowing yep other birthdays today Jared already told us Adrian Beltre is 46. 93.7 war. Tony Dorsett, 71. At least my relatives in Pittsburgh would tell me when he was a running back at Pitt, his name was Dorsett. And they never knew why all of a sudden his name is Tony Dorsett when he goes to Dallas. Thiesman thing? Well, Thiesman was changed to make it rhyme with Heisman. It was marketing trying to make get him the Heisman when he was a quarterback or a college quarterback. So I don't know why Dorsett did that.

Tiki Barber. It wasn't for the Morse at all. I don't know. And Ronde Barber, 50. Ricky Waters, 56. Damn dude. That was an early guy that I loved to annoy my dad. I've told you about that. I'm sure everybody did this, but there was like a two or three year period

where I was an Aggie fan growing up. I don't know that I knew that at all. Just to piss my dad off. That ruins everything for me. I don't know that, I mean, I was like six, seven, and I don't know that I was an Aggie fan. I just, I would root for A&M when they were on. Because you knew your dad didn't like him? Yes, and I was the same way with Ricky Waters because he played for the 49ers and for the Eagles and he had a huge earring. Well I bet your dad didn't like huge earrings in men. Okay, yeah.

The thing I remember about him is that his incredible talent held back Jerry Rice from... When you have a Waters, you have to give him the rock. Yeah, it's like, gosh, Jerry Rice is open every play, yet you just hand it off up the middle every play. Josh Hader is 31. That's a funny one, right? People try to say, oh, he got canceled. He didn't get canceled. But he was coming out of the pin in an All-Star game when somebody found his old tweets where he used the N-word. You know, it was the N-word? Yeah, I mean I think it was like,

I don't know, like he was in high school using rap lyrics type thing. Yeah, that's a tough one. It's tough to have the one that you really can't say really actually still be out there and very prevalent in pop culture. Dominique Rogers Cromartie is 39. He has a massive penis. We used to marvel at it in bad radio meetings. There was one picture in particular Donovan would always pull up and we would just stare at it. It's true. Now he's not the guy with 12 kids. No that is Antonio Cremarti. Yeah. Buster Douglas, 65. Dan. Beat Tyson. Danny Almonte is 38. Or is he? Do you remember him? Oh, hell yeah. That was right in your wheelhouse, I'll bet. It was. That

was like my first sports scandal. My first real one. Francis Ford Coppola, 86. Jackie Chan, 71. Man, I was a big fan growing up. Russell Crowe, 61. Speaking of a guy who said the N-word. Russell Crowe or Jackie Chan? My guess is both, but there's some hilarious racial scenes in Rush Hour between Chris Tucker and Jackie Chan and what they let them do.

It's a different time. Dude, try watching You Ever See 48 Hours, Nick Nolte and Eddie Murphy. Yeah. Yeah. It's fun mm-hmm John Oates 77 of Holland Christopher Darden 69 the attorney the OJ Simpson prosecutor Caitlin Collins, 33, your hero. Yeah, she's my hero, all right. Just carrying the torch for the centrist

neoliberal news media. Is she good looking? I mean, she's good looking. She's not necessarily my type, but she's an attractive woman. Well, I mean, you have to be somewhat attractive just to be on TV. But I feel like she's better looking because she's on TV.

There may be something to that, too. Like if I just ran into her on the street. But if you recall, she was the moderator, quote, moderator of that CNN town hall when CNN had a new executive. And he was like, hey, we're going to get the conservatives back. So he reached out to Trump to do a town hall. The Trump team was like, really?

Why? They let him do it with Caitlin Collins moderating it and they put these rules in there. And if you recall how it went, he body bagged her. And there were some really funny scenes from the aftermath. The executive stepped out after this stunt that he tried to pull, but they said that, they told Trump, like there was a big CNN logo

in the middle of the stage. She was sitting on one side and he was on another, and they told him not to come across the logo. Like don't come farther than this when you're walking. So in breaks he would walk over and touch it with his toe. Like your kid does when you're like, don't go near that. He would just walk over, the crowd would start going crazy, it was a bunch of bros that did not do a good job

trying to pick a neutral crowd. And he would walk over and do the, hey crowd, can you hear me? And then just put his foot on the CNN logo. Like Charlie, or what's his name? Rick James. That's awesome. It's so ridiculous. Clark Peters is 73. That's Lester in the wire. Eric Wareheim, 49. Why would I know who that is? Tim and Eric's awesome. Oh, I've never known his last name.

Really? Hmm. Dude, I love whenever a random sketch of theirs pops up. The did you kill your wife computer game. I bet Copeland's a Tim and Eric fan. Yeah, for sure. And Artiste and Autour. I like Tim and Eric's bedtime stories too. You ever see that? And our Jake birthday of the day. Chris Pontius or Jeff Tremaine. She is 55 years old today.

Mackenzie Scott. What's her current status? Did she marry a plumber or something? You mean a science teacher? Yes, but they've already been divorced. Would you? The answer's yes. So right now, you run into her in the parking lot at Fox Four.

She says, I want you to run away with me. And you can't go home to say goodbye or anything. You just have to leave with me. Your wife and kids, you leave them here. Won't see your kids again. Cause I'll tell you what, I'll do it. I'll never see my kids again. But I've seen a lot of kids.

Yeah, your age is a no-brainer. At my age and their ages, here's how the calculus goes. They will inherit. Exactly. If I'm able to- They'll never see you again. They'll also never worry about anything. They will inherit what you-

Yeah. So here's the problem though. You have to be able to- So you're causing them certain amount of emotional damage, but not the boy, he won't even remember you. No. He's not even three, right? Also, as rich as my wife will be,

she's gonna get a good stepdad. She's not gonna get some bum, right? But I don't know, I think the whole thing is contingent upon me being able to seal the deal with Mackenzie, because the worst that would happen is that like two months from now she's like- Oh, she'll get rid of you. The dick is kind of trash, and she kicks me out, and now my family hates me, and they got nothing out of it.

But if you told me right now- No, they'll get some, you're going to get a good payout. Then I'm going to do it. So they're going to get the money. I think I'd probably have to do it. Like right now- Like're gonna get a good payout. Then I'm gonna do it. So they're gonna get the money. I think I'd probably have to do it. Like right now? Like they're guaranteed a monetary payout. My mom, really good parent,

she's doing a good job with them, she can fill the, Kristen's awesome. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know, I think I'd probably have to do it. Just for the fun, just for the story. Ha ha ha. Born on this day now dead, von Schleicher he was the Chancellor of Germany before Hitler. Okay. Maybe he was like there George Bush

where like you'll get all the lefties right now watching videos of George Bush going look at this guy this guy makes lots of sense seeing how he's saying stuff. Look at it Reagan. Yeah totally normal now. I thought you loved Reagan look how he's saying stuff. Look at it, Reagan. Yeah, totally normal now. I thought you loved Reagan. Look how he's saying all this stuff. The opposite stuff. Yeah. And Will Kellogg. He invented the cereal.

Spare. Dead on this day, still dead. Henry Ford and died on this day in 2022. Rayfield Wright. Texas land and cow. Was he the guy who spread his legs? Yeah. That was a funny Bob moment right there. Well day one of Blake I would say is a success. No Blake. Yeah how do you feel Michael? I feel okay. Michael's filling in for Blake this week.

What does feel okay really mean? Well. Today's show has been brought to you by Fairlease too. Just wanna give them an extra plug. Fairlease.org. In case you're just tuning in. Sure. We'll find out if it was a success in about an hour, hour and a half.

That's when you expect the upload to be complete? Yeah. Hope so. I'll try my best. Is that what you wanna hear? Yeah, I mean, it's already done, yeah. Yeah, I'll take it. It's only gonna get better.

Would you do Blake's best or your best? What are we doing today? My best. So... Adios, mofo. We gotta go before this becomes a zoo! Thank you for watching my video. Subscribe and type for my name if you want to watch more of my god. I hear we have a birthday, happy birthday to Nima Shahbazi He's the Persian Fonzie, he drives the Maserati

I'm kidding, he works for Subaru, so he probably drives a Subaru But there's been about 80 cars he's run through And prom dates up to being prom king Nima was a freakin' prom king with a goatee Pook a shell necklace, Doc Martens and Oakleys While stealing your girl at all the little elm parties He's hardly just a boy, no he's a man now He's 40, from what I hear he's still super horny Okay not sexually but sports horny, he was before he got married In Chicago with fireworks

On a farm with wagons and corn leaves Now he's salty, still hates Jerry But Nico took his heart and buried No more Luca, no more Hooka But he's still got that puka Shell, oh hell, happy birthday Nima Scorspasi He'll read your script and give you critiques like a Nazi He's so popular he has to hide from the paparazzi He'll get you into an open bar F1 weekend

With endless tequila on the rocks, drinks Don't even mention the box eek That was a long weekend, but what a great friend He'll drive your firebird for hours While you're running around in a wig the wrong way like a coward He hates calling coward He's more of a dumb zone episodeer He's run the ball guy now with a riding lawnmower He's married and lives in a wig the wrong way like a coward He hates calling coward He's more of a dumb zone episode-er He's run the ball guy now with a riding lawn mower He's married and lives in a chateau called Chateau Bazzie So put your glasses up and sing happy birthday to Nima Shabazi Nima Shabazi

Nima Shabazi Nima Shabazi I see. Thank you.