The Dumb Zone FREE - NFL Draft Day, Shannon Sharpe defends himself, and Dan with a Name Game | DZ 4-24-25

Episode Date: April 24, 2025

Get every episode of The Dumb Zone by subscribing to the show at DumbZone.com or Patreon.com/TheDumbZoneIt's draft day and the Cowboys slightly tip their hand on where they're going in at 12. Shannon Sharpe says he has nothing to hide, Kevin Farley joins the show as he's headlining at Hyenas this weekend in Dallas. Plus, what happens when you give elementary school kids Jello shots and Dan presents the 2025 NFL Draft name game (00:00) - Open: White Lotus review (29:56) - Sports: Stars win, Cowboys draft night, Shannon Sharpe (01:00:32) - The Thursday Viewer Mail Follow Up Extravaganza Um Inclement Fossil Thing (01:14:02) - The 2025 NFL Draft Name Game (01:22:17) - Kevin Farley: Doug Limus from 2gether (01:38:42) - News: Elementary school Jello shots (01:54:29) - VM birthdays/Today in History with Heart Attack Man ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Hello! I'm professional broadcaster Dan McDowell, letting you know that you are about to hear one of our free podcasts. But if you'd like to subscribe at DumbZone.com, you'll get four shows per week, plus the weekend wrap-up and any bonus sodes like our Business Wednesday interviews. So, if you forgot how to use the 15-second rewind, that's DumbZone.com to subscribe. That's dumbzone.com to subscribe. Now on to today's program. Hello. It's a gloomy day out there today, Dan. Blake. A lot of times people, they think, I'm going to go spend my Saturday at the car dealership. You know, you don't want to be out there when it's all messy and rainy. You don't have to deal with any of that with Fair Lease. You can do this from your home.

You can do this from your couch, your man cave even. You can hit up fairlease.org and you can start the process of leasing your next vehicle. They'll deliver that vehicle right to your home. Make this as easy as possible. There's a theme with the people we work with here on the dumb zone. And it's about making things simple for you. So you can just sit at home and watch the WNBA draft. So go to Fairlease.org, click request a quote and then The Dumb Zone where it says, how did you hear about us? Right Blake?

Yes. It's Fairlease.org baby. The preceding and the following content are brought to you by No Puppet Productions and The Dumb Zone. If you want a hard worker, you can grab a butler, a barber, a cook, a carpenter, or a farmer. This year you could literally draft a graham cracker. Mason Graham, the Michigan defensive lineman, is white, Frito!

Oh, Frito, racism is back, my friend. Someone said that they think Blake has been upset lately because we don't have him on the artwork promoting us at the Byron Nelson. Did you see that? No, I didn't. Yeah, I didn't. I didn't even know we had artwork promoting us at the Byron Nelson, but we do. And there's like a picture of us, and there's a picture of Julie and Emily, and there's a picture of...

Danny, Saroy, and Cash, but you know, it's fine. No, it's cool. It's cool. Happy to be here. It's an oversight. I'm sorry. I'm Dan McDowell. I'm Jake Kelly.

I'm Blake Jones. Also Blake related. Well, let's just say this. Why am I on the run sheet? Hold on. Let's just say this. Why am I on the red sheet? Hold on. Let's just say this. Mama used to say, you know, the squeaky wheel gets to grease. Because she was a chirper.

Blake never said, hey, I got to be on there. Other people did. You're a humble guy. You know me. You don't need the spotlight. No, I don't. Now, they just assumed you and I are on there because I mean, humble as we may be, that's a given. You guys are the show. I have to have the spotlight. In lieu of money, I prefer the spotlight. Just put me on that thing and we'll pay everyone else to be there. No, more Blake news. Why? I

also saw some chatter online about our wonderful appearance on Fox 4's Last Call with Steve Noviello. In fact, I can tell you how wonderful it is. Let me open up the old email. Let's go to the Gmail and now let's switch over to the business account on the G... I have so many emails now. Too many. Since we started this... It's the same as we had before. This is ridiculous. It's the same. It's just now nobody has to yell at us to change our password. Be positive.

That's true. Look at this guy. You're right. Last night's episode that featured us on Fox Four, Last Call with Steve Noviello defeated Jimmy Kimmel, Jimmy Fallon go woke go broke and Stephen Colbert Wow on the backs of us I don't know what these numbers mean but apparently the number for Fox four and last call was higher

than those three so at least for one night only you can say you defeated the big boys. It's because those are shows of the establishment. Those are the shows that Harvey Weinstein and his cohort they put out there. This is the real deal with Steve Noviello and the dumb son. But on that show that's not the chatter that I saw online That was an email from John Kuklo, but on that show I think what last night's episode was the one where We did the gay not gay Which was demanded by Steve Noviello. We didn't want to do it. I don't think it's right to do it

I'm not ready to get back in those waters, but Steve Noviolo said you have to do it Well Steve was the middle because Dan wanted nothing to do with it And I wanted to call it F slur not F slur and Steve was like what if we meet in the middle? Yeah? And he's gay. He is legitimately gay So he says I mean I haven't seen him. I mean I've been hitting on him for two months. Going at it or anything. He's never hit on me. So how could he be gay if you've been around me

and yet they fall all over themselves. Hold yourself back. But that's the episode where I threw out one that wasn't on the run sheet. The was Jake gay because he was upset that he had to learn from his wife, looking at Instagram, that Blake's wife was pregnant. And then I saw internet chatter today

that indicated those watching were upset that we dropped that news there and not on this show like what do we what should we do like hey everybody big announcements and that's ultimately I think what I arrived at Blake's we kind of know not you like why do a gender reveal though Blake's pregnant oh dude you didn't tell me no oh congratulations I had sex once. Yep. Oh, that's so great.

Left it in too long, if you know what I'm saying. That's clearly not what I was expecting, and I didn't want anything on the show, but I would think, even if you just left the show out of it, which we'll get to, that we're friends enough. Like, he's got a kid around the age of my kid. You know, we go back many, many years sitting there outside the hotel in a training camp smoking a blunt together at 2am like, man, I don't know, is any of this worth it? And he's like,

we're gonna be great, buddy. And then he's there hugging me after fight night and all this. And then I just there hugging me after fight night and all this and Then I just find out like third party that he's having a child and not like nine months from now It's not we're not in the boy. That's weird You told people face like in the it's right in front of us, and we need to plan for it at work face I just think it's weird And I was hurt Yeah, and gay Let me answer the phone real

quick Julie speaker hey we're we're doing a broadcast like we broadcast every day at 1130 don't you know that so why are you calling now then okay girl mass yeah we're live on the air now we are I don't know, because you called me and I'm calling you back. Girl mask. Yeah, we're live on the air now. We are streaming, in fact. I invite you to go over to YouTube and check us out. Like we work together.

You sell advertising for this show and you know, like you're telling potential advertisers, hey, they're streaming right now. Here, watch, I'll call them and I'll get on the air. Heck yeah. All right. For sure. You got any message? I'm getting my hair done. I'll send you a picture.

Okay. You want to make the curtains match the carpet or what? By any ways, Julie is she... Oh, okay. I'll see you, Julie. Is she on the clock getting her hair done? Bye. What are we doing? You don't want to know what these salespeople are doing, bro.

They're living a whole other life. It's like it is for us on Wednesday every day. The clock. Yeah, we're like, oh, I guess I'll just go do this. Anyways, back to the debate, or maybe it isn't one. I was hurt. I remain hurt. He also has not said anything, if we're

going to include the show part of it about the fact that he's going to possibly be gone for training camp. Feels like that's need to know info. All right. I'm going to move away from Blake. I have a couple of Jake items. Okay. Okay.

One, tonight we're doing a live stream. We're going to live stream the first round of the NFL draft. We invite you to join us at 7 p.m. Julie, don't call us at that time. We invite you to join us at 7 p.m. Julie, don't call us at that time. We're going to be live streaming. We're going to be on the air. Jake has been named Minister of Pizza. Oh, okay. That's easy. Easy decision. Because I was, you know, we were faced with the task of needing food. I didn't want to hit some of the bigger restaurants

and sponsors that we've hit before. I want to save that for Cowboy season. But I thought, OK, I might order pizza. I'll just order pizza. And then I thought, these guys won't want me to order pizza. Well, it depends on how you look at it. From a get the pizza efficiently standpoint, we don't want you look at it. From a get the pizza efficiently standpoint,

we don't want you anywhere near it. From a show standpoint, Dan versus the Papa Tracker is as great of a draft night battle as you're gonna find. Like that's Jerry versus drafting Shadoor. I didn't say you have to go Papa. I mean, I just wanted to give it to him. Like all decisions. We'll have great pizza at a great price. At least the cheapest wanted to give it to him. All decisions. We'll have great pizza at a great price.

At least the cheapest they can give it to you. We will have a code. I can promise you that. You will find a code. Do you still call or just do online? Usually now, well, I don't know. This is like a whole side rant I have. The Dom, they actually do it at quite a few of them now.

You go to a call center To talk to your local Dami's Papa John's or the Hut. It's it's not it's an Indian Frankly, right? So I'm not I can't haggle with them Like I can't some like 40 48 year old stoner who's just like yeah, you know, we do have a three pizza deal It's much easier that these people are like no, you know, it's by the book. So online can usually be your best play. Excited about the draft guys. Um, yeah, I'm excited about tonight's program.

We'll have Katie, Kevin Turner over. We're going to have John Hampton over. Um, are we doing the whole first round? Well, you know, until we get tired of it. If we bail it, if we wanna bail it 10, we bail it 10. That's the beauty. Okay. We know when we're starting.

What if the end of the first round is where Chedur makes sense? That's the thing, if Chedur hasn't gotten picked, we're probably gonna have to just stick through the whole first round. I'm down to do the whole first round, but our buddy Tim pointed out that 12, the 12th pick last year was at 8 30. And so we're looking at what 11 30 finish almost. No I'm fine I'm worried this guy he might just turn the lights out. Well I can just leave

and go to bed. He's gonna be bawling out man he's gonna be Lone Star light it up it's true one other Jake item in this regards the show today because on today's show big Thursday mailbag get which includes gummy thoughts I got something special for you that I want to do right before the break we have sports as usual but we also have a guest Kevin Farley Which is Chris Farley's brother he'll be appearing at the Dallas hyenas this weekend and I Can't really say I have a lot for Kevin Farley, but Jake is like I Got it. I need Kevin Farley on the show

yeah, do you want to like wet anyone's appetite? Like get him excited? Because I tried to have you do it to me off the air today and I don't think I mean if you haven't seen the movie and the show together which was a fake boy band that he was in that I think was a big it was like a cult classic for me. Wasn't this kind of like what the Monkees were? Are you nodding at that Josh? No? I'm babying my own. Oh, okay. It's like to get her to get the Monkees.

The Monkees was. To get her to get, yes, it's like a play on the Backstreet Boys and NSYNC, but they were like, they made a movie, there was a show they actually toured, but they were like a fake band. Is that not what the monies were? The Spinal Tap didn't actually play. Oh, so it was a real band. I'm pretty sure yeah They did they open for like Britney Spears. Okay, so it wasn't a I

Mean Spinal Tap I guess did end up touring later But it was just a mockumentary and the guys in it were somewhat musically talented. Yeah, so they did. The Monkees was like an actual, the Monkees would be more like one direction or something. Well, that's what N'Sync and the Backstreet Boys are. They are like They are four separate people

Yeah. That music executives said, I'm gonna put you together. Or one of them knew the other one, and then they knew this one. But Blue Pearlman, that's what that documentary's about, I'm going to put you together. Or one of them knew the other one, and then they knew this one. But Blue Pearlman is what that documentary is about. He did all of that. This band was kind of a play on that,

except they had actual. And the funny thing to me was that in all of the boy bands, they have a guy who's the least attractive guy. That guy is still typically very conventionally attractive. But when they did the parody, their least attractive guy was Kevin Farley Okay, it was just a funny bit to me. Okay. Now what if now if he's on for 15 minutes and goes we go Oh, no, no, that's I'm I don't mind not expecting it'll go more longer than that But what if like in the first minute he's like, oh, yeah, I don't really remember much about that

Then we'll probably let him go. I mean, other than that, I mean, he's been in a bunch of stuff, but he's just a grinder. Okay, I'm just letting you know I have very little for this. I don't have much. But at times I've told you, don't worry about it, I got this interview, and then I do. But I'm just making sure that you do, that you really understand how little I have for Kevin Farley. It just seemed like a fun idea to me. All right, no, I'm on board. What are we going to do?

Hit us in the chat with your questions for Kevin Farley. I don't know. He went to the 2008 RNC. And then I have a way to, I wanted to promote Community Mechanical. That's our HVAC company. And bringing it back to Blake here. Do you ever have those guys over your house?

They were there yesterday. Travis and, what's the other guy's name? I know Travis very well. Anyway he was over my house last week. Little p.m. Preventative maintenance. Uh boy they uh they showed me they they opened up the the air conditioner outside and showed me an incredible mud wall. The mud daubers. Oh. Oh.

They're like, this is why you need to get this looked at every six months, and this is why you need us. To prevent it. Community mechanical. Are they communitydfw.com? They are communitydfw.com. Anyway, what I wanted to say though is I understand how Blake feels now when he's hanging out with us. And by that I mean I think even you felt this sensation. Travis is like 6'8". Yeah. And his main guy is like 6'7". Yeah, he's a big boy too. And I'm standing there 6'2". And I just felt,

oh my god, this is what the world is like to Blake. Yeah, no, I get everybody's looking, you know, looking down at him. I get now why you're always asking to ride me. That's what I asked Travis when he was just fixing, when he was doing my mini split. Imagine when they were at my house. They throw you around? What's the weather like up there? Like Minitasia? Yeah. Well, they came out to my house, and they took care of things.

We had the new Mini Dragon Den needed to be cooled, and they took care of that. They took care of it quickly. They do have trucks with the Dumb Zone logo on the back, but they mercifully did not park that in front of my house. So I think they have one truck with our logo on it and they got like a bit where they're giving away stars tickets, playoff tickets, if indeed you were to text their mainline with a picture of that truck.

Like if you see it out on the road. So what is their number? The number is 469-667-7290. 469-667-7290 for all your heating, V, As and Cs needs. It's community mechanical. We never did review White Lotus. Do you want to quickly at least give yours, especially you? Yeah, let me pull up my notes. Because you watched the entire season and then you stopped right before the finale and were only guilted into watching the finale, right? My wife was telling me, this is what she says every time she watches a show, oh I bet there's

like a White Lotus tour you can take. And there is. Yeah, she said she saw something on one of her other shows, like Today Show, about like a, for $180,000, you can do a white lotus tour. Well, I mean, that hotel, right? That's probably the, I mean, I've been to that island. You think it's more than like 200 bucks a night?

I thought you can be real like. You can be. But like a modest, if you make modest money, you can go to Thailand and be like a millionaire. Yeah, I'm surprised that even that hotel, they're saying it's 180 grand. Well, just whatever tour they would take you on. I think they'd take you to a couple of different locations.

It wouldn't be that much. Those islands are cheap I mean, there's a reason why Gary wants to stay living there Uncle Rico, I'm cool Rico. I thought the finale was great. I thought the it's a slow burn throughout the year But I thought it was very good I thought a lot of things were telegraphed that you could tell how How things were going to line up. One of the things that

didn't get telegraphed, I thought Uncle Rico was actually going to steal money from the black lady because she just, as we've recently talked about, she just gave him her bank number or routing and account number in order. I immediately said something about that. In order for him to deposit something into her account. But then he did end up depositing $5 million. I thought the youngest son drinking the poison was overly telegraphed. How many times are we going to just put the camera on that?

A blend of the protein. And I will give him credit. It is a slow burn. But I mean, they pay their symbols off, so the whole season the older brothers trying to get him to the younger brother to take the blender get the protein shake and he doesn't want it and if so it's every episode right the blender the blender the blender and then at the end they're like we'll put the poison in the blender they're very into the that sort of thing with this show I thought they telegraphed Scott Glenn. He's the old, old, that was the husband of the

Asian lady singer. The matriarch lady. Pretending she was going to be in a movie. They telegraphed him as being the father of Walt Goggins. So that didn't surprise me at all in the end. But it was kind of cool how the black lady, it's kind of the money corrupt thing, I guess, because the black lady did just what the lady did to her. At the end of season three with Jennifer Coolidge. Yeah, that did the same thing to her.

She said, oh, I'm now not going to invest in a business with you because other things have come up and now that this lady Supposedly wanted to start her own business and all this but then she once they get the five million out of Uncle Rico Says that to her Way too hot guy that is that she was sleeping with Like there's no way that works. I guess it's TV, but it's that's that's was sleeping with like there's no way that works I guess it's TV but it's that's that's certainly woke TV right if the fat black lady is getting this hottest Asian dude ever like I just didn't see that being

realistic at all like I wanted to have sex with that guy I thought he was I well I wanted to have sex with both of them uh-huh so I will tell you that there are some people that maybe would be like hey This lady's a little big, but there's nothing wrong with it, but I would also agree that in this case They push the woke relationship too far. Yeah, I'm not saying I wouldn't wait too far Throw a leg on it as Jake would say very yeah like that But I would I would say that he wouldn't yeah I would I would with anything I do think that he wouldn't. Yeah, and I do think. I would. I would with anything.

I do think that's to the extent that the show's trying to make a point. It is about money corrupting the whole show, really. Other problems that I have, significant problems? I think the dad was terribly cast. He was well cast on Look, the dad of the North Carolina family. Mm-hmm. But supposedly his grandfather was governor of North Carolina, and they have generational wealth

in that family. And so he's like a real high society North Carolina guy, kind of like the guy that got in trouble a couple years ago in South Carolina. The murder case. Yeah, not Kavanaugh. No. You were really into? Murdoch. Murdoch.

Murdoch. Murdoch. His, and he didn't sound like he's from North Carolina. I'm like, who is this guy? And I researched, he's an Australian. And once you know that, then a lot of things he says, you're like, yeah, there's the Aussie accent. Seriously, that makes sense.

He was terrible. I just thought as far as a that's a North Carolina dad, absolutely horrible. Doesn't help that he's next to Parker Posey, who's crushing it. You don't think so? Do you think she was crushing it? I don't know. It just felt weak.

She felt like overdoing whatever she was trying to do. I just didn't get it. Man, maybe. And it's not like I grew up in the South South, but the super 1% pilled up older church white lady, I feel like that's the vibe she was going for and nailed it but it was uncomfortable I'm glad you brought up pills okay let's paint this scene so she is really addicted to these pills I don't know if

they're pain pills sleeping pills they seem to be sleeping pills at the beginning whatever but they're there for a. The father has made it clear he's never tried pills of any kind. That's not his game. In fact, looks down upon her derisively a bit for... She's popping these pills all the time. She even offers him one to help him sleep. He doesn't need any... I don't do pills. I don't do that game. He tries one, kind of loves it. It's getting him in a zombie mode. That's what he's got some problems going on at home.

So he's in a zombie mode because he ate the pills. Then he loves it so much that he steals her pills. Now these are the pills that she is addicted to. She, this is her whole life is these pills. She is upset at first when she can't find the pills and then we don't hear about it again. I'll tell you what, if I can't find my whatever I've brought that I really need, Lean On, to help me take that edge off or whatever, I'm gonna be really... first of all I'm probably not leaving the purse downstairs out of my sight

You're always keeping those pills on you if that's your game. You would think so However pills are a little bit more like you lose track of things a little bit more But I'm glad you're making this point because you would have been upset You would think she would be upset. She would keep looking for him. She looked once she got back to the house But here's the thing then she just she could sleep everything was fine. She would keep looking for him. When she got back to the house. Yeah, but here's the thing. Then she just, she could sleep. Everything was fine. She had a great week. You're skipping a super important detail.

And that is the part where she dies from withdrawals. Because you cannot be taking 20 Benzos or Valiums a day. That's why you'd be looking around all the time. Where is it? Where's my pill? Have you guys seen my pills? You physically, it's an opiate. You physically, like when I went away, sorry,

the people who have to stay away from everyone for like a week are the people who are taking that many pills, because your body freaks out. And she just is like, well, I guess I'll switch to one. That ain't going to work, huh? And like mentally, though, you would also be really zipping around. And then this guy all of a sudden is popping two at a time.

He's never done pills before, but he's popping two at a time. He's drinking hard liquor throughout the day. I just thought there was a lot of not realistic. And speaking of not realistic on drinking and all, these guys, when they went to that party, the full moon party, they did something, ecstasy, I don't know. That's what they make it seem like. But they would, mid trip or mid whatever, all of a sudden

they're having real, coherent, well thought out conversations. But then they'll go back to, oh, now I'm dancing and acting like I'm ecstasy. I just thought a lot of unrealistic stuff regarding the drug use. And I won't have it anymore. All right, so my one, which I think is kind of a larger conversation, the situation with the North Carolina family, the dad who's in finance, they're away on vacation in Thailand. They've got their three teen to college age kids with them and they're gonna put their phones away

That's part of being at this resort in Thailand. You go no phone for 10 days two weeks This guy's getting rung up on like insider trading or something he's involved in some level of white-collar crime and he finds that out when they get to Thailand Blake and Somebody's calling him. It's his lawyer, his lawyer's like, dude, it's not good. The third phone call with the lawyer, he's like, you're probably gonna do like six months to a year. And you know, they're gonna get in your money.

And this guy's like, you know, he's like, dance it. He's a legacy family from North Carolina, multi, multi, multi, multi millionaire. And he gets told like, it's not good, you're probably going down. It's probably six months to a year it's gonna be in the papers whatever and His first and immediate thought and the thought for the rest of the season is I got to kill myself

He finds a gun immediately only reason he doesn't use it as he loses it now. He's trying to poison himself. I Think the only trying to kill the whole family at one end. At one point, yeah, except his son, which I thought a cool little story, but I just think if I were him, I'd be like, you know what, fuck it, we ball. I'm gonna thug this out. I've got $20 million in the bank, the government's gonna come take,

even if they take all of it, on me, when I get out of jail in a year, what do you think I'm gonna do? I'm gonna have to go work at a fast food restaurant? I'm a guy- I'm the governor's grandson. I'm the governor's grandson who was at the top of this law firm.

Look at all the people who go to jail and come out from that class, you're fine. You don't need to blow your head off at 60 years old because you might go to white collar jail for a year. Let's have a pair. And the whole season is just like, oh, I can't take it, it's so much stress. The worst thing that would have happened

if he would have been on the phone is they come to Thailand and take you. Would have been embarrassing, but I doubt they're gonna extradite you over financial crimes. But you just go back and go to jail. In fact, I'm thinking his kids would have thought it was cool.

Like, go to your son and be like, yeah, dude, we're playing, his son works for him. And he's like, what's going on at work, dad? Just tell him, listen, I'm a criminal. That's how I built all this. I might have to go to jail. Not immediately. I've got to kill myself. I thought that was unrealistic. Goodfellas has changed my view of white collar jail. Yeah,

seems awesome. Well, I mean, it's a movie. Hang with your buddies. Eat lobster. I don't think it's just the bros, but I don't think, like if you're the guy from Oklahoma City, he was going to jail for like 30 years and he was old. So he wrecked his car into that in Bank Man going 120. I think a year in no rape prison is, you just got to do it. Your kids are grown. Yeah. Ride it out. Yeah. Be a man.

You're gonna be fine. Um... Alright. Let's do this. Too long. What's too long? That pause? The episode. Oh, it was an hour and a half. Oh yeah, I like that that the last like 30 minutes or Hall of Fame stuff from Walton Goggins. I will give you that that was that was nice. Yeah Walt's Wall continues to be great. Uncle Rico is great. The fact he's still out there. I'm sure he'll be involved again That story line won't die sports today brought to you you by ownwell.com slash the dumb zone.

That is the place that can help you reduce your property taxes. EMOS. Because you've signed up for everything at Own Well, which just takes like five minutes, right? As far as the, they'll check on other, I haven't done this part yet. I've gone in with the property taxes, but you can also put in other bills that you have. Yeah, they just tried to lower my phone bill. They have lowered my internet bill, but it says here, I've got the email in front of me. We've started working on your appeal for

my address. So I think the deadline is May 15th for your property taxes. OwnWell is already on the case for me and they will be going forward. So it's sign up in three minutes but it's into perpetuity. Hell of a deal. If they get you money, then you pay them a slice of that money. A smaller slice than any of the other pro services. Don't think of it as you paying them even. Well no, yeah, they'll just take a slice of the money that they save you. If they save you nothing, you pay nothing.

So that's a great risk reward I would say. You weren't getting that money on your own, trust me. We've tried fighting these before. Ownwell.com slash the dumb zone, do what establish the run guy does and hit up Ownwell at Ownwell.com slash the dumb zone. Big stars night. I fell asleep but I watched it this morning

before I knew the score. That was awesome. And I honestly, we had talked about it off morning before I did the score That was awesome and I honestly did we had talked about it off the air the other day the latest cock thing and I kind of forgot until player intros he was coming back and In my head I'm like boy this this feels tilted That place was insane. Yeah, that's the craziest story short of the story We're gonna talk about later of the generic lacrosse player white that plays in the NBA now, but three years off the ice Tell me the story. They got hurt. The last time he played was the end of the 2022 The 2022 season when they won. So then he missed What he missed 2022 23

he missed, what he missed? 2022-23, he missed 23-24, and he missed all of the 24-25 regular season and is now back in game three. Why would you miss three years? It was knee, but then it turned into a whole bunch of other stuff related to his knee. Like he would get back to where he was like skating three on three and then he would miss another three or four months crazy, I Mean, I think it got infected at one point his first game back was yesterday Yeah, it was a very you know, I don't recall the duration for Alex Smith But it felt like an Alex Smith type story. So except he's still somewhat good. So the barn was going crazy

It was dude. It was nuts and he's he's you know He's in the starting lineup. They rode that momentum to a victory. No, but it did it did To your point though if I were to make some case I do think that there was energy at the start of the game that was tilting the ice a little bit He was fired up like laying hits and going crazy. And then they kind of, you know, they only allowed the old. We got to withstand that exactly. And I think that is a real thing.

And they did. I did nut it up. And, you know, I don't know much about what I'm watching, but I know that in the intermissions and following along on Twitter, it was like, you know, you're out playing, you're out playing the abs and you're down. That's the type of game where if you lose, I don't know. I felt so great for Tyler Sagan.

You get the outplaying and lose dude. And that was a sweet goal too. He looked moose. Nico started it. He was giddy. Yeah, the random thing is funny. I mean, I only know like the story of how he was traded and then traded again but

He's been awful Like he's given them nothing. Yeah, the advanced stats all of it is terrible And they're obviously without Miro and Jason Robertson. So they're kind of hanging on by a prayer but It's a big win. So they're up 2-1 now? They're up 2-1 now. Next game in Dallas is like Monday right? I think?

Yeah. Yeah. Wait is that right? Is it that far away? Next game in Dallas they have one more. Yeah. Yeah I was like what? Yeah.

I got one little Nico thing. I don't want to do too much on it, but oh, I did watch Luca the other night. God, he went nuts. He just Luca'd. He's just, that's the thing about Luca. That's the thing. He's just so, he's consistently going to give you 30. But he might just give you 45 sometime.

Yeah. Or he might like, he's consistent. That's the thing. He's always awesome. And he might be super, super awesome. And I thought he was super awesome the other night. Game they needed to win. We thought it was a must win.

They did too. Did you see the, did you see the poll, the athletic player poll? Oh yeah. I saw some of this stuff on that. You got anything from there? Well, just that in, in one of the, in one of the charts that the athletic put out,

one of them was who's the most overrated player. And there's a, let's see, it was 90 votes I think for that one and Luca didn't get one vote You know how hard that is To have you know, it's 90 guys, but we're a great player. Yeah, who especially one who pisses people off and He didn't get one Do you think being traded helped that?

Like clearly he's not overrated. I don't know what he would actually trade him. But what's weird is that I I don't It's hard to think of too many players who have been critical of him current players You know what I mean? Like Tyrese Halliburton who finished number one on this list for whatever reason Everyone hates that guy. Whether it's Tim Hardaway Sr. on down to seemingly Dame Lillard and every other, people just don't like him. But, and you know, he finished first.

So, I don't know. The Mavericks did skyrocket up one list, which was worst run organization. They popped up, they're up to like number five now. Now, that's a fun one. Yeah, I think that's too low for them. Jason Kidd received no votes for aside from your own current coach who is the best coach in the league. No votes, that is 147 votes cast. votes for aside from your own current coach who is the best coach in the league.

No votes. That is 147 votes cast. Anyways, things are tough. Things are bad. Things are really bad. So realgm.com had a, uh, an article. I don't know if it's true. No, it's real GM is quoting Tim McMahon on Bumani Jones, which means that's what Tim McMahon has heard. Oh. That was nice, sorry. That the Mavs want to, Patrick Dumont wants to hire an experienced executive to work with Nico Harrison. Now! Now he's saying it. Now. Which means he's going to keep him around. I wouldn't

predict anything. I feel like business wise, Patrick Dumont has to fire Nico Harrison. The sooner the better. And you have to say, look, I was led astray. I was led astray by this wayward, you know, that's the only way for them to get any of this business back that they're losing, man. Just to end, then you'll say to Patrick Dumont, yeah, but you were kind of criticizing Luca right after. Look, I'm a businessman. I don't know ball, but I did. I was convinced by this guy. Like, you got to turn him into the total total. He is the one evil piece in all of this. It is the only way for Mavs fans like me who have left the Mavs, like I will not support the Mavs, to possibly come back.

To possibly come back. But you just can't, because even if they ended up winning next year, I don't think they will, like it's such a thin little possible margin that they could actually win at all But even if they're kind of winning you'd you'd have to like to trade away a guy five years younger You like you just don't do it. It's just so illogical I think he must be fired and that's the way that Patrick Dumont can just kind of take the blame on himself for Being snookered by this guy take the blame on himself for being snookered by this guy.

What's crazy is they had a guy, Dennis Lindsay, the guy who was a former GM of the Jazz, and now I think he's back with some- Did he go to the Pistons? Yeah, I think so. But they had a guy, and now it's not all that shocking that that guy left because Nico was clearly very difficult to work with. By the way, the same thing could be said for Donnie Nelson, who the Cuban tried to hire

Garzon Rosas many years ago and that lasted about a summer before he's like, what is this? So I'm not trying to say that they had the cleanest functioning organization under the previous regime, but that smug motherfucker sitting up there and going, and it doesn't really work when people try to tell me what to do, because I'm pretty stubborn myself. I don't need that shit right there. We know, dude. All the reporting now just looks true,

because everyone keeps saying, boy, this guy's operating kind of as a lone wolf here, kind of stubborn. But the problem now is he's lost his death grip. Because those dollars, the death grip era and you know, he even alluded to that in his press conference. He was you know, he did the my relationship with Patrick, like we talk a lot more because we're in this together now. And we're talking a lot more you Yeah, no, that's right. You're going to be talking every day until you're not because you two are the same thing. So I do think he's losing that a little bit.

That's where Jumon has to separate him. They have to separate the franchise as if this wasn't even us at all. The villain. Yeah. We were bamboozled. We bought in. We thought, oh, this guy is the, you know,

and we might end up blaming Cuban a little more in this case for, hey, why didn't you give me a little more insight on how inexperienced this guy was. What do you think? I don't like to bring this up. I never bring this stuff up, but others do. Is Dennis Lindsay white? Yeah, I think so. Yeah, he's white. What are your thoughts on the racism angle that Nico is replacing because the Tim McMahon article which did come out the other day talked about what a Casey Smith the trainer yeah like Dirk's favorite well liked by all the players apparently including Luca and that he how he the way he was fired is a little bit makes it a little worse. I'm sure Tim McMahon is

Possibly playing that up a little but still You that's a franchise built on loyalty and blah blah blah Well, let me say this real quick Tim would not have included that detail about firing Casey while Casey was away Taking care of his dying mom if the story was not about Nico not understanding how to relate to people. You know what I mean? Like if this had just been a normal he got fired story, even if there was acrimony, they wouldn't bring that up.

But the point of the story is, this guy is a weirdo. He doesn't know how to get along with anyone. So I think that's why it's important, albeit a bit dramatic I also think his fallback is the a you circuit You know if he wants to get rid of the white Europeans or whatever I just think that's he's an American guy who knows American players Well, he the people he's firing or getting rid of our white and

The people he's bringing in are not. I know. So it's just tricky. Something to look at, folks. Something to look at. It's tricky. Got to keep Cooper flag. Now that'd be great, right? He passes on flag.

That's the only way I'll believe this is an NBA conspiracy is if they get the number one pick. That'd be cool. That's the only way I'll believe this is an NBA conspiracy is if they get the number one pick. Pretty cool. Kind of cool, but I don't want Nico around for it. Really though, if they get the number one pick, this is then a conspiracy and I will never not believe that. Yeah, I don't know.

I don't care. Let's just- Just don't care about Nico anymore?. Don't care about Niko anymore. Oh, yeah. Didn't Jerry Jones even, they brought that up yesterday. Do you have that audio or no? No, I don't have it. I could probably get it pretty quick, but. He's, uh, with Gene? Yeah. Yeah, they asked him about, what is he, I mean if you're there with Jerry Jones, yeah, throw out the Niko trade. I don know if it's a work or not believe I'm trying Speaking up here our nightmares and trading great players

How have you taken in the Luca trade and how that's? transpired last week Well, I'm a fan of the Mavericks big fan of the Mavericks and Consequently a a fan of the Mavericks, big fan of the Mavericks and consequently a big fan of Luca. The world knows that I've got my hands full thinking about what we think about over here, much less trying to figure out. I look at the Mavericks through a very much entertainment eye. And I know Luca was a personal friend and watched a lot of games with Wouldn't you pay to hear it?

Them talking? Oh my god. There's no way they've had ever had a substantive personal friend. No, I mean, I wouldn't think so. But, you know, and would hope that he would be able to watch some more games with us as we go along though his family pretty well and his support staff pretty well. So all of that is just one as a fan. Now, Jane was all state scored 17 straight free throws in the state championship game. And Gene lives and dies with that basketball.

And just cried when Luca left. But if I understand that and I understand frankly, you say, how could that happen? I've got a little bit probably better understanding how something like that can happen. Well, that did cause, I don't know, someone on the internet said, hey you guys need to look into Jean Jones' basketball career. I tried. The career? Well, he just said she was all state in basketball. And alluded to a stretch of 17 consecutive free throws made at one point, which perhaps is her highlight of her career.

But being all state, but also being all state as a white female basketball player in Arkansas in 1955 or whatever. Wasn't a whole lot of options. Feels like she might have been one of the five players who played basketball. Correct. And it is the most female.

There's no way they had a girls basketball team. It's the most. Well. In high school. Yeah. I don't know. If anything. I mean, they had.

Like in the 80s they might not have, let alone 1950. Yeah, I think it would have been the three on three game, right? Oh, they only played half court, didn't they? But it's the most 50s white basketball thing to Marvel like it's Kobe scoring 82 to be like, she made 17 straight free throws. The crowd's just going bonkers. She's at 11. This is insane.

She double digits? What sorcery this woman. Yes, the giant crowd at a basketball game in Arkansas. Well, so another guy that I think Jerry's fairly familiar with is Tillman Fertitta, he's the owner of the Rockets, and has a close association with the Houston Cougars, the national championship Houston Cougars. Wait, no. Second place, yeah. They blew it.

Lost. But they were at some sort of appreciation rally, and the Rockets owner, this guy was, I think involved in UFC, maybe his cousins are involved in UFC, anyways. I was in the White House, in the O Oval Office with the Prime Minister of Italy. Not already, I'm loving it. Love Italy.

Yeah, that's popular down here. The Prime Minister of Italy and the President last Thursday and we talked about the Houston Cougars I can promise you for at least a minute and a half. Ooh, a minute and a half. Ooh, a minute and a half. I mean, hold on. Tight 90. The funny thing is, at least a minute and a half, that's a weird time frame to put on something. Do you think, hold on real quick, just let me back it up.

So is that the way, he's talking to a college basketball team, right? They're all sitting there watching. They're not even in suits. This is not like 35-year-old pro athletes who know, they don't know. Prime Minister of Italy. All right, you think they're like, holy shit

You had the PM of Italy on It's just uh, yeah The president last Thursday and we talked about the Houston Cougars. I can promise you for at least a minute and a half I can promise you for at least a minute and a half. A minute and a half? And then we talked about that dumbass Luke Doncha trade that Dallas did. Wow. So by the way, that's an owner.

Luke Doncha? Hold on. So that's an owner, by the way, who is considered pretty involved in his team. He's out there. And he is the owner of a team in Texas. And this is how he talks. And then we talked about that dumbass loot

Doncha trade that Dallas did. So if you think Patrick Dumont had any idea what was waiting for him that Monday morning, there's no way. There's just no way. What a tepid response by the crowd. Yeah. They were less excited about that than that prime real estate of 90 seconds with Georgia Maloney or whoever she is. I have some stuff that's lightly sports. It's sports media.

Okay, sure. I don't care. You want to talk about, oh wait, what time do we, what's our set up here today? We want to break at like 45 to get ready for Kevin Farley? Yeah. Well, I have something to do before the break, so. Why don't you go first?

No, I'm going to go right before the break. OK. So Shannon Sharp, there was news last week that he was looking for an eight figure podcast deal. Was that right? Nine. Wasn't it? He was looking for a lot of money.

He currently does a podcast, the Club Shayshay podcast for Colin Coward's network. He's a regular on ESPN and he's, I guess, somewhat of a hot media property right now. No longer does the regular show with Skip or on TV, but he's a guest on First Take and Get Up and all that. So, Guy also loves to fuck. Loves it. Loves the ladies.

Sounds like he's good at it. He, you know, there was a story that he had, he had live-streamed himself having sex on Instagram live sometime late last year. He was, I think, lightly mentioned in that FS1 makeup lawsuit, and was also kind of thought to be behind that, because he had just left Fox, and he maybe have had like an ax to grind.

Like some people thought that he put that hairdresser up to that because of the way he was treated and the way he was treated by the boss and maybe even by Skip. And that that's where that came from. Well now he's getting his allegations, which is a woman, initially was a, Jane Doe filed this lawsuit on Sunday in Nevada

alleging that he assaulted her a couple times physically. Whole bunch of other stuff too, manipulation, control, emotional intimidation, but that he's raped her basically. That they were a part of, they were in a consensual relationship, but that he's raped her basically. That they were a part of, they weren't a consensual relationship, but that he went way over the line. And so we talked about this a little bit,

I think the other day when it first broke, but there've been a few developments. The first of which was his attorneys decided to fight back by releasing some text messages. Now they're fighting back again against Tony Busby, owner of a tank, lots of nice art, and I think he got Kevin Sumblin fired in addition to trying to sue Jay-Z and everyone else. He was the lawyer for all the ladies on Deshaun Watson, right?

That's probably the most apt piece of info. So I don't think we, did we read the text the other day? I think they came out after the show. Go ahead. I don't think we did. So they go right for the kill, like they do. I love how when lawyers write like this, it's like a book does.

When you start a new chapter and there's a quote at the beginning. I hate it. I love that, when lawyers write like this, it's like a book does. When you start a new chapter and there's a quote at the beginning. I hate it. I love that. Why? And it sets the tone for, I don't know, it's just cool to me, especially if there's,

like if you read a book where it's one guy who's quoted at the beginning of each one, I like that. They don't even start with like a sentence in this release. They just start with a quote in italics. Quote, I want you to put a dog collar around my neck and choke me with it while you're fucking me. This is from her? Yeah. Okay.

Another one right after, I know you missed this big juicy ass 25K for each cheek. This lawsuit filed by Gabrielle Zuniga and orchestrated by her attorney, Busby, is a blatant lie, blah blah blah. They also include a couple of other ones where she says, only if you put that baby gravy in me, then I can do whatever I want to me. But I think that means to say you. I want to put my tongue in your asshole and then marry you.

Just like in the olden days. This is from her? All of this is from her. Oh, okay. That's my daddy fuck, I want you to put a big black baby in me. And finally, to keep with the theme, I think it's important to note this text,

eight months after the one I just read for you, you better crave it because you're gonna be stuck with it for life after you put a big black baby in me." She's very focused on acquiring this large black child. Obviously, they're just including this to point out, like, hey, it was getting rough. I thought I saw something where... Well, they did release some audio of him saying, I'll choke you. So then TMZ gets this audio yesterday of, she recorded it.

There's a lot of pauses in here, so I'm going to kind of skip around. And maybe it's not that I'm thinking of. Did he say something about release the whole sex tape? So yeah, I got to... Like they were going to release a part of a sex tape? Here's his first response, which it looks like he's just sitting at his first take studio and somebody just recorded it with a phone. It's really weird because this stuff came out Sunday he was on the air Monday on the air

Tuesday so this is from Monday. To my family friends supporters and colleagues I want to speak to you directly and from the heart this is a shakedown I'm gonna be open, transparent and defend myself because this isn't right. This is all being orchestrated by Tony Busby who is targeted Jay-Z. Tony Busby targets black men and I believe he's going to release a 30 second clip of a sex tape that tries to make me look guilty and play into every stereotype you could possibly imagine. That video should actually be 10 minutes or so. Hey Tony, instead of releasing your edit,

put the whole video out. I don't have it or I wouldn't myself. You know what happened and you're trying to manipulate the media. The encounter in question took place during the day at her invitation. And now that appears to be a deliberate setup. Coordinated by Gavin, also known as Carly on OnlyFans.

Gabby and Tony Busby want $50 million. What they're getting is sued for defamation and trying to take me down. My career is all about real talk and honesty. I know my family and fans know exactly what this is about. And I'm going to be out there telling you whatever I need to say, just like I always do. I love all you, whatever I need to say, just like I always do. I love all you guys.

Thanks. All right. Now, here's the voicemail. Now, would you guys watch that video? That's the dumbest thing you've ever asked. The full sex tape, Shannon Sharpe. I mean, I don't know how... I probably wouldn't make it past...

I'd need 12 watches to get 10 minutes. Well, I didn't know if you wanted to have a screening. Like we could do it at the Alamo. Yeah, we could do a screening, or we could do it online. Yeah, sure. What would we give away? Like we give away little cap guns for point break. Dog collar is good.

Yeah. Choking with a dog collar, that's another level. Yeah. It's different. A little extra humiliation in there. Some people just like. I like your style, Shannon Sharp. Some people just have different lives than we do.

You think? It's amazing. The way they talk to each other. So then she recorded a phone call that they had. One of our wives who put on a dog collar if we asked? My wife hasn't said no before. Honestly I bet I could get that done. Interesting, okay. Now I may have to put one on too. But I thought... Which you'll happily do. Yeah, I think so. She's never asked me to put my tongue in her ass.

25k a cheek. Jake's silent on that one. Yeah, dude I don't know. It's all the same to me, guys. This is a phone call. You're already down there. Sure, whatever. I'll stop by on my way home. This is clearly an attempt by her

to get him to say something crazy. They're in the middle of a fight, and she starts recording the call. Will you're coming to LA tomorrow? They're in the middle of a fight and she starts recording the call. Uh. What? I'm not really interested in getting choked. So I guess we're going. I might choke you in public. Big black guy chose small white woman. Then there's like 10 seconds of silence.

It's not a good book, Shannon. Not a good look that you did with the shit you did to me. Okay, well... That's pretty much it. This is why Dan can't date a much younger woman. That's how they talk, all time as the latest are capped even though they're making like two hundred and fifty grand a month to pop some ass it's

yeah i don't know i mean it's a weird situation i'd i'd like his play of like, put out the whole tape. Show my massive dick for 10 minutes. That's awesome. Yeah, and especially if he feels pretty confident, this is good for the Shannon Sharp business, right? This drives. Well, I will.

When do we get a sex tape? I mean, I think in the end, you're're probably right but ESPN has taken him off the air as of now hmm I mean it's too hot for ESPN well I mean I think the fact that he was on Monday and Tuesday at all is indicative of a cultural shift like what if this was I think this happened to in 2017 he would have been off the air Monday oh yeah it McAfee rides it out till proven guilty in a court of law ah Not skip what's the screamin a I

Don't know I don't know I feel like if this is getting bad, so You know they took Mike off Michael Irvin For allegations, but let's ever happen with that So they took Mike off, Michael Irvin, for allegations. Whatever happened with that? Just kind of went away, didn't it? Seemed like he was innocent too. That was the NFL network. That wasn't ESPN.

Here's one more quote. Wait, where'd it go? Uh... Hold on. Heh. I cried when you left because I begged you to put a condom on and not put it in my ass and you didn't listen. The woman who was 19 at the time texted him. I don't care what our history is, no means no, Shannon. Mmm. So we might have a Kobe...

Kobe sitch. Anyways. Anyways, indeed. Do you want to do a little viewer mail and then my thing and then break? Sure. What are we doing here? Yeah, man. Okay, we can do that. It is Thursday. So we got to do the big Thursday. The Thursday viewer mail follow up extravaganza inclement fossil thing. We'll make this brought to us by Early Bird CBD because I got some gummy thoughts in here too.

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EarlybirdCBD.com, dumb zone is that promo code. Let's switch over here to viewer mail. Oh, I'm gonna start real quick, okay? This is from E Perez, pursuant to the recent mention of Dr. Atkins, who I believe we all said, it was kind of like doing the wedding crashers hang gliding thing, we're like, oh, I'm so healthy,

I ate a bunch of beef, I'm dead. He didn't die from eating too much beef, or whatever we were saying he did. That's definitely what my playground was saying. Yeah, like, oh, look, the old beef guy died. He died slipping on an icy sidewalk. He fell into a coma and died. He did have cardiomyopathy, a heart muscle disease that

was probably caused by a virus, not by what he ate. And then cholesterol lowering diets show no evidence on benefit on mortality, blah, blah, blah. Are there a couple of true stories like this, though? Jim Fix, wasn't he a runner but he died while running? Something like that. He was like a real famous runner. Or the Marlboro Man.

You ever hear about that? Yeah. Like in the commercials and I think he died of lung cancer. There is a precedent for a guy, I'm trying to see... A guy who invented meat diet died on a piece of meat or... Steve Irwin count? He says, this guy, see this is an interesting email because this guy is just basically saying like hey, no, he didn't die from meat.

That's not true. And I would have appreciated that note. But there are people who see the world like this also. Because E. Perez continued, the libtards fear of meat and fat have been wrong this whole time. I say that as a libtard. Liberals are not omniscient.

Omniscient. Omniscient. Omniscient, I would think of omnipotent. Yeah. But infallible gods. We must be wrong about some things. This is one of those things. And I'm like, okay man, I don't know.

I like meat. I'm messing me up. Go ahead, Blake. An anchor phrase addition from Brian. Wreck, W-R-E-A-K. Havoc. Yeah. Reek.

Wouldn't it be reek havoc? Yeah, you say it as reek, but I don't, I've never, I mean when you Google it, the example has havoc in it. Yeah. Another one, they would soon have a chance to reek their revenge on the enemy. It's reek?

Yeah. Yeah. Have you been saying wreck havoc all your life? Oh yeah. Yep. To be fair, it's kind of one of those. Nope. Oh, play-by-play fair, it's kind of one of those. Nope. Oh, play-by-play guy, he's definitely used that phrase.

Look at him wrecking Havoc. Has wrecked Havoc? No. Reaked? You wreak Havoc. Yeah. OK. That's, to be fair, kind of a tough one along the lines

of untracked. Right? Untracked means got on track, got on track. Which is a little bit tricky. Got on track, got on track. Which is a little bit tricky. I heard from a Dallas Cowboys employee who has reached out and said, I've never gotten the pancake mix from Aspen. It's on the docket for this weekend.

I didn't do it in weekend check, but we had it this weekend. Oh yeah? Yeah good great. We didn't have buttermilk though. Yeah. I feel like and then my wife was like I don't know if this is the greatest pancake I've ever had. I go I think you have to make it. You got to soak it overnight in buttermilk. Yeah. Well she did soak it like half hour or something but not in buttermilk. Yeah I think that helps. But they are really good right So yeah, maybe that's something. I've got to track down. Where are these but that's kind of like shrimp or a Lobster and I dipped it in butter like oh, okay. Yeah, I guess it does taste good like but it's a different kind of I

If I pour these pancakes, okay This is regular pant is ancha my my pancakes, but I poured more sugar and buttermilk and like every whipped cream. And guess what? It's the greatest I've ever had. Fine. That employee didn't get one, but that fourth kid did.

Yeah. Guaranteed one of those got delivered. And then my last one, I need help from our audience. Cause I got an email from a listener, says on last Tuesday episode, this was from March 18thth the listener sent an email saying he's got a Texas bar in New York City I think his name was Jason or Justin didn't say the name of the bar. He owns I'm also a Texas transplant living in New York City and would like to know what the spot is So if you're this person we need to hear from you

So if you're this person, we need to hear from you. And this goes to Jake's point. We're going to Jake's point of never trash, only archive. Because that message got trashed and I can't find it. That's okay. Good. That's a public service. That is a good public service. So Jason or Justin runs a Texas bar in New York City. We would like to hear from you so we can connect you to I have a pretty crazy one here So I got a couple or a handful of emails that were bad be to Jason about public sex

Like Danny Jeans the guy who lived in my house before I lived in it in college He also had the same move, I heard from a number of people on this one, the residential construction move. Like if you're in high school, finding a house that's just at the right stage of being built, where you can't just see into it, but it's also not, you know, full.

And he said, I found a house with doors, no. And... He said, Ohhhh... do my girlfriend sprinted up the stairs with her shorts still around one ankle leaving me there alone like some sort of bare-ass statue they walked out the back door and we exited so I've never been caught like that dang that's bad and this email from Amy is not about being caught but about complications she says fiance now ex and I, did a Catholic church pre-marriage weekend counseling session. Weekend.

Dan did that. A whole weekend. Had to be on the weekend. I didn't do a whole weekend. I mean, I did one session with a guy. It was just one session for you? Yeah, I didn't have to go stay somewhere. She said, we did a pre-marriage weekend counseling session.

Wanted to bang and search for an appropriate secluded spot. Traipsed around the wild for a while, found the spot, got the deed done. Within days, we were covered with red spots and severe itching. Not being from Texas, we didn't know what was going on. Turns out effing chiggers. Weeks of ridiculous remedies like calamine lotion

and sitting in diluted bleach water. What kind of hell hole did we move to where you can't even eff safely in the wild? The chiggers. I do, I've always, I guess I didn't know that was Texas specific because when I watch outdoor adult material, I'm like, eek. So we- You're always thinking of that? It would be itchy

but yeah there's one great thing about the fake grass you can bang it at no jiggers one of the funniest things I ever heard on the ticket ever and I was not allowed to replay it was when somebody brought that term up on the hard line and Danny was like no no, I think they prefer Chegros. Dang. And just nobody knew, is that dump, is that not dump?

Then it was just don't replay it. But no, that's a big part of the outdoor boning. Itching. When's the last time you guys made love outdoors? I don't think ever. Really? No. Never in a dugout?

No, was it fast times? No. I think once. Once for sure. Yeah. I'm thinking about it way too much right now. Out in the wild? Not super wild, but outside. Do you have one you want to do? I have, hey dumb zone, curious as to whatever came about on Jake's skydiving excursion. So we got canceled the weekend that we were supposed to go due to wind dialing. It's been windy.

And that means that morning. That sounds like. If it's windy, then maybe I shouldn't be doing it. That's enough to debilitate the whole thing? It just feels like, yeah, like, when you're up, how do you know? Like, what's the miles per hour that you can't? I don't know.

If it was 15 miles per hour, they'd be like, oh, OK, this is good wind. But if it's 17, have they done a study? I mean, I'm sure their insurance company has. Yeah. Even though, I mean, I guess you are signing a waiver. But it got moved To this coming Saturday morning when I believe the weather will also be Prohibitive okay, so you're not counting on it happening soon

Yeah, and it's weird too. I just kind of forget about it It's not real pressing on my mind. I also had Z Mentioning one-day. He asked if when I retire, will I consider a one-day contract with... what do you think he says? Um... Because it's not the ticket. No, I know it's not the ticket. Okay, the station in Dayton you used to work for and have a press conference on William Pace's YouTube channel. Yeah, yeah. I knew he would. What if I called them and just said, hey, I work there.

Would you sign a one day contract? No, yeah, you do it, but you have to do it very presumptuously. You have to do it kind of like whenever Corby would walk you around and be like, you have two minutes with this guy. You have to call and be like, you know. Tell them.

Yeah. I'm signing a one day. I'm calling to sign my one day to retire there. Yeah. Assuming that they would be stoked on that. I'll need 30 minutes on morning drive on this day. Man, I'm gonna, I have a much, probably longer presentation on this one

when we have video and audio, but I got a lot of information on cock fighting. A lot. And I went back and forth with this guy. I'll just read part of this. He says, I personally haven't been to these fights here in Texas, but I've been told by family members he's from Mexico.

They're a common occurrence in the Metroplex. They're shocking initially, but once you've seen a few, you become to the brutality of it. They're legal in Mexico, they're quite organized. Bets are simple and straightforward. You bet on the rooster you like against other onlookers. Money's handled by the organizer. It's about 20 to 100 bucks, max 400 or 500 bucks.

The rooster fighters in Mexico take this super seriously. They feed them special high protein meals and they train them. They import roosters from Oklahoma and Arkansas where they breed them. I've seen some pretty wild stuff in the ring, I've seen some pretty wild stuff in the ring such as the rooster's owner sucking blood out of the mouth of a dying rooster to help it get a few more breaths to help it keep fighting and even a rooster getting cut and literally flying out of the ring in a panic. Wild shit. It is an adrenaline rush. Yeah I got a bunch of... apparently that stuff's happening around here, bro. Yeah, we're over in like Northside, Fort Worth. I bet we could find you one near this sit-in today pretty quickly.

Yeah. Insane. But I'm in. All right, I want to end before the break with something, but I do want to say I loaded up the fitness pack apt over the weekend, something else I did. Remember, because we were talking about having a steps challenge. Here's the bit. It does cost money to load it up and start trying to use it. So I did the monthly. I just did one month.

It's $2.99. But it's well worth it, we are told. Because, you know, you can just kind of get into it. It's fitness packed, is what it's called. And yeah, you get into it with a buddy or something, and you put challenges against each other. Maybe with your wife. I don't know, Blake. Do whatever you want. I'm not your boss. Yeah, I mean... But it's gonna cost like $2.99 for at least a one month thing. Try it for one month and if you like it then you could get a bigger discount, go higher. Yeah, you're definitely more likely to achieve your goals, fitness or otherwise, if you're doing it with a friend. That's just science. So, Fitness Pact is the app

you can use for this. You can... two people don't have to be doing the same challenge. You set a payoff. Speaking of. Two people don't have to be doing the same challenge. You set a payoff. Speaking of wives, why don't you just make a pleasure pact with your wife? Go sign up for Fitness Pact, and whichever one of you performs that service more for the other one, wins that week.

And I don't know, you work it out. It's Fitness Pact is the app. Prove to her that you do more of the work. This is a great, this is accountability. If you think you do more than your wife, set up a challenge and see who does more in a week and really heal your family dynamic with the power of fitness packs. Alright, so today is the NFL draft. And we used to work at a radio station called The Ticket, and there was a guy on that station

that did something every year called The Name Game, and I would fashion my own name game in honor of this man, Norm Hitchkes. Okay, I'm recording here, I'm recording here. That's right, we did this last year, but we lost the tape. I think we're good. But here's a special gift did this last year, but we lost the tape. I think we're good. But here's a special gift to Josh Ewen,

who's having us out at his great house again. What an honor. I would like to present to you. I won't move. The 2025 NFL Draft. Terrific. Name game. In honor of Norm Hitchkes.

May he rest in peace. I think he's just, he's resting today. NFL draft name game in honor of Norm Hitchkes. May he rest in peace. I think he's just, he's resting today. He's in peace. I hope it's a peaceful rest. Yeah. All right. You know how we do it. Like you have a list of every player in the NFL draft

and Norm would look at their names and be like, oh, this name is, you know, whatever. So, in the 2025 NFL Draft, you can get a heart wig, a hennessey, and a huzzy, a lampkin, a lippy, and a longer beam. You might come away from the draft with a fortune, O'Donnell fortune, cornerback, South Carolina. And you could pair that fortune with Longhorn great Kelvin Banks. Dumb Zone fans can choose four Dans or two Jakes, but no Blake. If you want a hard worker, you can grab a butler, a barber, a cook, a carpenter, or a farmer.

This year, you could literally draft a graham cracker. Mason Graham, the Michigan defensive lineman, is white, Fredo! Oh, Fredo, racism is back, my friend. If you wanna get somewhere fast, you could take a car, a van, or the Dart. Malik Carr, Darvin Van, and Jackson Dart. If you're feeling down, pick up Jaden Blue. And to keep the patented color bit going for yet another year, you can also get one gray, two browns, two blacks, and three greens.

It's baffling to me that Florida's Elijah Badger didn't go to Wisconsin, and Tennessee's Omar Norman didn't go to Oklahoma. They missed out on some serious NIL marketing opportunities. Rough! Maybe. Get presidential with a Washington, Adams, Jackson, Harrison, Johnson, Taylor, Wilson, Ford, and Carter. If you drafted defensive lineman Ty French and offensive lineman Josh Fryer, your team's scrimmages could feature French versus

Fryer. Oh, Frito! We don't have to be racist to be hilarious, my friend. Bill Parcells once famously said he wanted to pick out the groceries. Well, this year he could just go to Kroger. Kai Kroger, punter, South Carolina. Snag a Shine, a Singer, or a Scataboo, a Yarns, a Yates, or a Eurosec. The very last player listed alphabetically is Gray Zable, but he will absolutely not be the very last pick. In fact, I've got him in the first round of my big board. This year your draft could be perfect dude, because you could get a Tyler, a Garrett, a Corey, a Cody, and a Kobe. It may be ironic that you could get linebacker Ty Wise from Miami of Ohio

because if you did it would not be a wise pick. I'm sorry he's just not very good. Why not make a strong pick instead? Dorian Strong, Virginia Tech. You could bring Mr. Rogers to your neighborhood. Will Rogers, the quarterback from Washington, Pat. Get a horn, a herring, or a Hemingway, an Ellsbury, Elzinga, or an Iziruaku. There are three JJs, three RJs, one DJ, three CJs, three TJs,

and two BJs. I personally like to bookend the draft with a BJ at the beginning and one at the end. And finally, Frito, in the 2025 NFL draft, of course, we want to end on a high here. So we could get a little dirty and say that there are two guys named Cox or six Johnsons or maybe the fact that you could end up with Chisholm on your hands.

Efton Chisholm, wide receiver, Eastern Washington. But the dumb zone is above that kind of low-hanging wordplay because we think you should come out of this weekend with a good moosing. Like Aggie wide receiver Moose Muhammad. And that is the 2025 NFL name game. Rough, rough, rough, rough, rough, rough, rough, rough. The Dungs, the Dungs, the Dungs, the Dungs. You had to be excited with all the scrutiny first and foremost, but the excitement that

you generated when you walked out there, then you gave them the Johnny Mantel sign. Had to. I mean, I felt a lot of excitement in the building. I mean, that's just me, man. I'm going to bring a lot of excitement wherever I go, and I want to win. That's the main thing. I think with the coaching staff that they brought into Cleveland, I think there's a good possibility for that. So like for me it's just going and work really hard and

try and establish myself and get better as a football player. I personally can't wait to see you play. Thank you very much. Over to you Kurt. You're listening to the dumb zone. I want to promote one more time. We will be on Big Fox tonight with last call with Steve Novello. I think tonight's our last night for the week. But Boffo ratings according to John Kukla. Hey, look, we beat Kimmel.

We beat Colbert. That's right whoever does that And then tonight of course we're doing the live stream for the NFL draft So it's time for a big-name guest We have Kevin Farley who's gonna be at the Dallas Hyenas this weekend And we have a sponsor for this segment. It is One Day Door. First of all, Kevin Farley. Everybody is here. Comedian Kevin Farley.

Kevin, do you read me? Hello, pal. We got you, yeah. Can you hear me? Yeah, so we have a sponsor for your segment. It's called One Day Doors and Closets. Okay. Just based on that name. What do you think? Okay, listen. What does that mean?

Tell me. What does that mean? You're gonna get your closet in one day? See, thank you. We thought this was, you know, pretty clear. You'll get your door or your closets done in one day. They won't come take them after one day. These are not doors and closets that will be in your home for one day. You don't buy them for a day.

You don't buy them for a day. But it takes one day to install the interior doors of your home. Like walk around your house, you're going to be like, these look horrible. If you ever actually stop and look at them, your doors, replacing them, could go a long way. And you could do that with One Day Doors, onedaytexas.com,

promo 30. That'll get you a BOGO door. How's that deal sound, Kevin? Buy one, get one free door. You ever heard of such a thing? No, I haven't, actually. I haven't. He's a well-traveled man, and he's never heard of it.

Not with doors. No. Maybe like a sandwich or something. A hot dog. Yeah. Maybe a pizza if you're lucky door a whole door And they're their copy here says it's like hanging a new piece of art in every room when you get one of these door It's solid. Yeah, it's not hollow go up your door and hit it with an axe right now, and you're gonna see it's hollow

Do you have an axe I don't have one handy no But I'll go find one and hit my door Yeah, and the good news is if that one if you destroy there will you have another one? So if you did that shiningining thing, if Shining, if they had called one day doors, Jack Nicholson doesn't get into the bathroom. Think of how history has changed. Yeah.

Yeah, so it's onedaytexas.com slash promo 30. Hey, Kevin, thanks for joining us. That's right. How are you? Great, Kevin Farley, still with us. So I'm just going to be straight with you here. I knew that you were in the standup game and I knew that you had a long career and that you've been a working actor and comedian.

I'm an elder millennial, so I'm 39. And to me, I was the high school kid who thought all the boy bands were gay. And I was really just upset that all the girls in my high school loved them. But then MTV made Spinal Tap for boy bands. And I was maybe 15 or 16 when it came out. And the boy band together in the movie and the TV series, I thought that was genius when I was a kid. I was really into SNL and parody songs and things like that

and so this comedic take on it to me, I thought at the time was brilliant. I agree, I mean when I read the script I thought, well this is gonna be a lot of fun and I think we had a lot of fun with it. Sometimes though I think it went over a lot of people's heads and they really thought we were a band, you know, because we had really good songs. It's just if you listen to the lyrics, you would, you would know they were a joke, you know, like, I know my calculus, it says you plus me equals us.

I mean, that's kind of a that's a silly lyric, you know. And the hardest part of breaking up is getting back your stuff, which is a good lyric, too know, and the hardest part of breaking up is getting back your stuff, which is a good lyric too, but I think a lot of people thought they were real, you know, and that's where we treaded that line of real boy band and fake boy band and comedy boy band. It was weird, but it was fun. I had a good time. And you guys toured a little bit, if I recall. So how would that work out? You would have a backing track and you're just like, well, I guess I'm going to dance like a, like I'm in a boy band in front of 20,000 people.

We had a whole choreographer. We had a sitcom. So, uh, this guy Bradley, who was our core choreographer and every sitcom episode, we had a song and a dance like The Partridge Family or something. We had a lot of good choreography. We worked hard on it, but we toured with Britney Spears, but we were in

the parking lot of the Britney Spears concert. We performed on a bunch of hay bales so we weren't really with Britney Spears but we were in the parking lot of Britney Spears. So how does this deal work? Your agent comes to you, by the way also I thought it was funny that you know in most of the boy bands they do have an older guy who brother or not kind of takes on the older brother role. And I remember as a kid being like, man, it's weird. That guy is like 31.

But you were 35 at the time that they made you the older brother. And this is not a shot, but you're Kevin Farley. So it was very funny to me because the old guy in the boy bands is still a hot strapping guy, but when they made the parody boy band, they got you at 35. It was a very funny image to me

that you were part of that choreography. Yeah, I think what I did is I auditioned and I thought I had a decent voice and sort of did, and then the funny thing is they put me in braces to sort of young me up a little bit. And they gave me a young kid's kind of chronic disease, which I think was rubella. And so I had braces in rubella.

So it kind of, even though I was 35, I had youthful things attached to me. And so when you get that role, I mean, I don't know what the industry's like then versus now, but you're signing up, are you signing up at that time to go perform on Bails of Hay outside of Britney Spears show? I mean, it's a very unique job.

Yeah, well, MTV was gonna do their first movie when they hired us, and that was the first movie MTV ever did. So we went up to Vancouver and filmed this movie, and that's where it started. And then they brought us in and they said, we're gonna do a sitcom up in Vancouver. So right after that, we did the sitcom. And then we toured. But the tour wasn't that big of a deal. It was basically that Hey Bell show and a couple other shows. And then you know, we just fell up. Well, unfortunately, Mike Cuccioni, who is 16 years old, died of cancer. And that sort of put an end to it. It's pretty dark, turned pretty dark there. But yeah, that was the basic up and down, you know, making of the band episode of together. But you know,

we had two albums that went gold, you know, I mean, we did pretty well. You can get those albums. How does that work out back end wise? Do you still get any you plus me equals us money? Not at all, no. We got a deal, one of those deals that most boy bands get, you know, which is like, here's $3,500 but we get the rest, you know, that kind of thing. So that's $3,500 but we get the rest you know that kind of thing so that's $3,500 yeah like did you ever actually interact with Brittany no no I don't think we did I think I had people got pissed at us because we were making fun of them. That's what I was going to ask you about is if you had any interaction with the

actual members of those bands or their circles or whatever, because part of the reason I liked you was because you were making fun of it. Well, the N'Sync guys had a good sense of humor about it. And not so much the others? Back to you guys? no, not at all. No, but I think LFO, they like this, or what was it, 96 degrees, they seem to have a decent, I didn't really talk to those guys,

but N-Sync or N-Sync, they were really down with it. They liked it. They were fun. That's interesting. So when did you start doing standup? Is that the first love? No, what I did was went into Second City, which followed my brother down to Second City in Chicago,

and I was an improviser for a long time. But improv, you know, you don't really make any money at improv. It's sort of a love of the art. And I really loved it. And I did that for a long time. And then I would do a lot of sitcoms and acting and this and that, living in LA for a long time. And I was just in many movies.

And then I decided that I wanted to start doing stand-ups. So I would go to the comedy store. This is like 2009 or 10, probably 2009. I would start going to the comedy store and just working out my sets. And then Norm MacDonald, who's a good friend of mine, asked me to go on the road with him. And David Spade asked me to go on the road with him. So I learned a lot from those guys, and I'd open up for those guys. And that's kind of where I started doing it and I've been doing it ever since.

Is that rough to open for guys who are already like awesome? And then the bar is raised kind of. Not really because you don't want a guy doing really well in front of you. And that's sort of the thing inside baseball is stand up. I don't want to follow a guy that's really bringing it or really good. That way I look really better. OK, so remember that this weekend when you go to hyenas.

Yeah. Whoever. Sometimes you get like there's a lot of guys at hyenas that are really good. And that's fine if you want to be, you're upset huh yeah that will upset you that will piss off Kevin Farley this weekend if you're too good it won't it won't piss me off it's just that I it's hard you know when a guy's like really really good I'm like oh shit I gotta bring it you you know? No, that's what I would bring it.

Yeah, put the pressure on, you know? That's why I do the first segment of the show. That's a good point. I have noticed that. I have noticed that. So yeah, two shows Friday, two shows Saturday at Hyena's in Dallas, hyena'scomedynightclub.com. That's interesting.

We recently talked to Jeremy Piven. And he is in the stand-up game now, and I went to go see him, and while it was entertaining, his situation is sort of unique because he's basically up there kind of doing Ari. And he recounts life stories, and I think he has a love for the craft, but it's not really a stand-up show.

Whereas you have you, but also people do associate with you with your brother, who I don't really recall ever doing stand-ups. So how would you describe your act? Yeah, I don't have a persona on television, like an Ari or anything. And I don't have any kind of real character besides maybe together, but I don't know if people remember.

So I come with a clean slate in a lot of ways other than my name. So I can pretty much create a stand-up routine or an act that's generated on my own. I don't have to compete with, you know, a huge character like Jeremy does or anybody else that comes from television and people are just kind of, kind of have that in their head, you know, when they see him. But in a way, with your name, are you competing against Chris? Oh, no. I mean, there's no way I can, I don't do that. You know, I

think after, I don't know, I guess he's been dead 30 years, you know. I think I've been doing it so long. I'm not really like Chris in a lot of ways. I'm sort of more, you know, sort of not low energy. I'm not as, I'm not gonna jump on any tables. Yeah, no, I don't have the bombastic energy that he did. We're pretty different in that way. But I think I have some of the mannerisms and the motions that the Farley family, which came from my father pretty much. So I think people, they see that when I do the show, but I think they're not really expecting me to like be as bombastic on stage as Chris, you know.

Yeah, I guess that just like you said, it's an expectation when you walk in, hey, I'm gonna go see this because it's Kevin Farley, I know Chris Farley, and now I don't I guess I don't know what to expect but that's where I thought maybe there's that competition in a way like I have to be good enough that they're not really disappointed that Kevin Farley wasn't really funny like Chris. So you have to win him over in your own way I suppose. Yeah I don't really compete with any I

don't compete with anyone on stage I just try to be myself. I don't I don't really compete with any I don't compete with anyone on stage. I just try to be myself I know I don't think I don't go in there and I Compete with Chris or something like that. I just have I actually have never thought about that and I think a lot of people After my shows they you know, you should come up to me and go I thought yeah I sometimes they do that, but I don't think about that in my head I've never ever thought about that. I'm in competition with Chris. It seems up to me and go I thought yeah sometimes they do that but I don't think about that in my head I've never ever thought about that I'm in competition with Chris it seems strange to me but um no no I just I never that had never occurred to me I just don't yeah yeah two shows this weekend at hyenas in Dallas to Friday to Saturday, you fired up for the NFL draft.

It's funny, the draft, I mean, when I was growing up, the draft was never really that big of a deal. Boy, they that shows you how big the NFL is. You know, like, all right, we're at the draft. And then the the combine was just a bunch of guys running, you know, and I guess we're looking at that now. You know, I mean, I don't care the draft sure I'll watch it. I mean, I don't I don't know I mean, I don't know why everybody's so into that but I mean I'll watch it. Yeah, but

You live on because you live on LA I'm sorry. You live out in LA No, I live in Florida now Florida Florida okay. Get away from those libs. I lived in LA for 20 years and it's like if you ask me what I did I'm like I don't know. I have no idea. I forgot that I was there you know and but I guess I was there for 20 years I don't remember but yeah no, no, Florida's great. It's a lot of bugs, but I like it. Yeah, it's fun.

I just didn't know if you had any, I guess, people from LA, I want their thoughts on stealing my favorite basketball player in the world. Donkey? Donkey. Yeah, so you're pretty familiar with that story? I just know that he got traded from the Dallas Mavericks. I don't know if there's any backstory or anything.

Yeah, no, it's just that he's great, and the guy that traded him sucks. Yeah. We're all very sad. Well, you got Anthony. Didn't you get Anthony? Exactly. That's all they got.

All right, Kevin, thanks for your time, man. two shows this weekend. I know this will see you there Come on out. We gotta have we're always have a good time at hyenas So I got two shows Friday two shows Saturday can't wait. All right, man. We'll see you. Okay. Yeah guys the great Kevin Farley And Oh, it looks like we're going to do the news, and this is a kind of a straight-up sponsor brought to you by Underdog Fantasy Sports. Did you see what I did on there today? I did.

Yeah, I actually put in a bet for this weekend. So Underdog Fantasy Sports, it's like you pick two different players and then it'll have an over-under listed next to them on different stats. And you're just trying to pick the over or the under on certain stats and then it's kind of like a little parlay thing. Yeah. You could multiply. You could take five, ten different players and then you win more with each one. But I went with just two. Luca versus Anthony Edwards. For those who try to tell me that Anthony Edwards is anywhere near Luca, well, certainly

the odds makers don't think so. He's at home. His over-under for points, rebounds, and assists is 37.5. I went under. Luca is 45.5 half and I went over so Another reason to root for Luca. That's right. Go do your your rage Wagering the under a during Ragering with the underdog app sign up now using the promo code TMD to unlock a special offer of up to a thousand dollars

And bonus cash that is TMD. The underdog app it's it's very simple very very straightforward and it's fun to play so yeah like you're gonna already be in spite mode make a little money on it with underdog fantasy. Here's Jay with the Dumb Zone News. I don't know if we even need to keep updating the story but Austin Metcalfe's family was targeted by another swatting call. Third time. This is the white kid who was stabbed to death by the black kid? That's who you're talking about? Yeah, his

family. In Frisco or wherever. Where is it? Frisco. All right. Third time. What does that mean? What did they do? Someone calls and says there is a shooter. This one, they don't have any information about the origin of the call.

The other two, they responded to a call about a gunshot at a home. And the cops show up, not guns blazing, but guns prepared. And people have died from this. Very weird loophole in our society. It's like, we need to be able to respond to stuff quickly and everything is real. Is this a boy who cried wolf,

like at some point do they stop going? need to be able to respond to stuff quickly and like everything is real. Is this a boy who cried wolf? Yeah. Like at some point do they stop going? Well that's the thing is that at this scale they don't usually stop going they just keep wasting money on it and eventually somebody gets hurt. What if they just put, would it be cheaper if the police department just installed like a ring doorbell cam on a light pole outside. And then when they call, they'll be like, well, let me, eh, no, there's nothing there.

Not bad. Because that would only cost like $50 or something, right? $100? I don't know what's going to happen next with this story. It feels volatile. Because the way that these things happen, they have this really long lifecycle. I think of like Amber Guyger.

Well, we're however long away from the trial that'll bring it all back up again it'll be all anybody's talking about then you get a sentencing appeal yeah and over the weekend there was some like white lives or white pride rally where some online rabble rouser tried to I did get on the track on the field where the murder happened and he's being apprehended by the cops and he's on the phone on speakerphone on live stream with Metcalfe's father who's telling him to chill out and he's like yeah I saw that it's insane first of all there wasn't a

lot of you called a rally there was like I don't know how many people are watching online but not in person but then he's doing his online thing. Yes, the father, so he is interviewing the father of the kid that was killed. And the father is like, look, I don't want you guys mentioning my son with your cause. I don't want you guys doing this at all. You are not speaking for us. And then these guys started yelling at him like, yeah you're weak. You're just weak. You don't understand the struggle of the white man. It's like, oh man. Yeah, it's crazy. What are we doing here? And that's the thing. That's what online, I think, tends to. You get those online muscles and things seem bigger. Whereas then when you go look at the rally,

it's actually that guy and five of his friends, then that's all the rally was. Like people weren't showing up, but you'll get some numbers online and then it's like, oh look, look at all the people who are into this. Yeah. It's weird, man. A woman, a Houston area realtor was murdered in downtown Dallas.

Her family spoke to Fox for, over the last couple days for the first time, 28 year old Ashley Long. So she was visiting from Houston, leaves a Dallas bar at 2 a.m. And he just kind of, I'll just read it for the police report. A man Long was with reached out and brushed his hand along the passenger side of a passing Mercedes. The passenger of that car later identified by detectives as a 34 year old Kendrick Finch,

exited the Mercedes with a gun in his hand. So what we're talking about is he's like walking with her, some guy, a car drives by and he gives like a signal. Like the car drives by and this guy just kind of reach out, touches the passenger side of this passing Mercedes, that car exits with a gun and get her in the car. I don't get it. Wait hold on I think I have this story wrong. That did happen but okay so the man that was with her reached into her purse pulled out his gun and then this guy

started shooting. Yeah so I had it right but backward. This guy is walking with her, he's a guy, he's with her. This car passes by and... I'm just boofing this story, it's so confusing. Did you look at it before? I did look at it before but I mean, yeah, it's just, it's confusing. I'm just gonna read the story

The woman her name is long Police say a man long was with reached out and brushed his hand along the passenger side of a passing Mercedes The passenger of that car later to identify by the as a 34 year old man Exited the Mercedes with a gun in his hand the man that was with the woman reached into her purse pulled out his gun That's when the man who had exited the vehicle opens fire. OK, so there's no coer connection. No. It wasn't a hit or anything.

It wasn't a hit. That's what I was thinking at first. OK. So. The guy was mad that his car. The guy was mad because he touched their car. That's what I thought at first when I read it like that. But it's that.

Oh. And it's also confusing because it says he got his gun out of her purse right right right and it was throwing me off so but sometimes you know you have your wife carry I guess that's on or something but that's what I'm saying is that common like if like what I do I don't really like keeping stuff my phone so I was be like hey we hold my wallet yeah go to dinner just people just put their guns in their girlfriend's bag they must write if you can't carry it around. Can't open carry it, unless you strap it on your back.

Yeah, so a few hours after the shooting, the assailant, the guy that got out of the car and shot, called police and told them it was him. But he didn't actually turn himself in until they put out the call on social media. until they put out the call on social media. And they put out the call on social media because there was a video on something very similar to Dallas Texas TV, I think we talked about it

the other day, the account smashedutopic had posted a video of the incident. And that's how they got the guy. So we sometimes think about, man, I wonder, what is Dallas Texas TV, what does the police department think of them? They probably love them. Or are they just releasing videos that they already have?

Like, do they already have access to all this stuff and this guy is just making it public? You know, I bet a lot of it they do, but I've told you before, like I've had Fort Worth PD call me after a 1 30 news segment or email me and say like, hey, you referenced having a video of this incident and off West Seventh,

you know, we need to get it did you ever have a cop ask you for your ring doorbell video I had somebody stopped by once because there was like a series of thefts in the neighborhood so they're like how long is this video go um I've not yeah I've asked What do you mean like my neighbors my my father-in-law got his tools stolen last time he was in town Hmm, which it was He left him in a tough spot. He knows he took the L on it, but we had to at least go ask the neighbors Performatively, yeah, and I don't know why you're never getting it back Yeah, he was like I'm gonna go drive around. I'm like man. That's we want to talk about a rage quit move performatively yeah and I don't know why you're never getting it back yeah he

was like I'm gonna go drive around I'm like man that's we want to talk about a rage quit move like you're there's no chance bro like he just kind of drove around the block I wonder next hour like it's not happening because tool tools are expensive right you get a big tool box oh it was not yeah and he was like helping us remodel It was everything a nice air tag in the bottom of the tool the toolbox I'm just air tagging everything bro. It's great. Yeah ever since I tag my dogs. Oh Steve No, V yellow said he air tagged his kids. Yeah off campus

Trips This story this last one comes to us from Tyler, Texas Dan Yeah, on off-campus trips. This story, this last one comes to us from Tyler, Texas. Dan. I've been there. She was preparing for the Jones Elementary End of Year party. And she purchased jello shots on Facebook. And said that she didn't know that there was vodka in them. Which just seems impossible to me because no one just.

How naive do you have to be? No one just makes jello into little shot buckets of mini jello. How do you buy them on Facebook? The jello's already made? There are places that can do that. If you have maybe a little daiquiri stand or something, you can sell bulk jello shots.

But you have to go to a place that only sells alcohol to get it. Or even if they're homemade. Did you not have a question about the price? Like why these were $1 each when a thing of Jell-O is $1 itself? Because of the inflation. Inflation and the time spent making it and stuff, you're paying for that.

Tariffs. Tariffs. You know how much Jell-O costs from China? Tariffs? Tariffs? You know how much Jell-O cost from China? Some teachers found it odd for the parent to serve Jell-O shots, but told the school resource officer that the parent was involved in school events,

so they trusted she wouldn't serve alcohol. So the kids were all eating little squares of Jell-O and got effed up? Yeah. I mean, if you had a Jell-O shot, like when's the last time you put your hands on one? It's just like a small salsa thing, plastic container that you would get at Rosos or wherever.

You know what a Jell-O shot is? Oh, sure. Yeah. OK. I mean, it's like a shot. Shot glass. It just slides out. Yeah.

Right. So you do kind of have to scoop it, give it the little scoop. But I'm just saying. They had that. They just had those lined up for elementary school kids? Yeah. All but four children had to go to the nurse. Ah, I shouldn't laugh.

One student passed out at home. Another one threw up twice at school. Two teachers. Because they're pounding them. Of course they are. One got a DUI on his bike ride home You go home and spend like 25 grand blow your college fund on switch or do one of two elementary school crimes this or

Go yeah, have sex with the elementary school. Holy yeah That's it's not even like no one is debating which one of those is worse. You'd rather do this one. Yeah, like everyone. OK, so just remember that next time your kid comes home drunk, be like at least the teacher didn't have sex with her. The power of positivity. Yeah.

Yeah, no. Two teachers, they tasted the jello shots, and they're like, yeah, this is ever clear. They reported, this is funny, two teachers tasted the Jell-O shot, they thought it tasted like alcohol. They reported this to a superior who also went to taste the Jell-O. Oh yeah. Let me get to the bottom of this.

We've all wanted to do that. You sure that's cocaine? Yeah, test the drugs. Let me see. Oh, she's doing a smirnoff nummy And smear off Tito's, but I honestly wouldn't make Jello shots with Tito's. I want to be very clear about that That's a trash trash game Jello shots is a trash game. Yeah, dude. That's for

That's for like an outdoor situation That's for like an outdoor situation. Do you ever do like grain alcohol and you soak? Watermelon? Yeah, just soak fruit in it overnight. Dude. If you could have seen, so where I went to college, we would go float the river, right? Well, that required getting on a bus, a school bus, an old, like the Bang bus that Letty has, and riding that bus from where you get

into the parking lot to where you drop off. And there would just be some guy, probably 25, and he would just have a bucket of that watermelon up there, and he was driving the bus and eating it all day. Just driving through back roads, hammered, in this bus full of college kids with tubes and he'd just be like laughing munching on this watermelon. It's insane. Jello shots or the lady who left her gummies out. Remember? It was the teachers. It was like at a preschool. Yeah. I think she got serious

time. Serious time. Well, and she didn't, ate him right or did they oh they they did oh, okay? Yeah, yeah, she got serious time like one count of child endangerment for each gummy or something crazy and Both very bad, but one of them way more likely to kill you The jello shots not even close like I guess you could have like a but I'll bet you they don't Know well what color is this lady to I don't know that's a sexual nervous... But I'll bet you they don't... No. Well, what color is this lady too? I don't know. That's a good question. Because it was the black lady that left her gummies out.

Yeah. But no, this is way, way worse. They're lucky someone didn't get hurt worse. Alright, there's your news. Okay. The Dumb Zone News. Like and subscribe. The Dumb Zone presents Today in History. Do you want to join us for this, Josh Ewen? Okay, alright. This is brought to us by Frankel and Frankel, personal injury attorneys.

You know what? They don't like the fact that they exist. Three. In a perfect world, they wouldn't have to. You know, if insurance companies were just cool, like, oh my gosh gosh the guy who had insurance got an accident with you and you got injured that's terrible our bad you need a little physical therapy after that accident yeah let's pay for it well we'll take care of it no but they don't that's the thing so Frank will like

reluctantly they're like all right we're gonna step in here we need you need a voice and we're gonna be the ones to be that voice. We will fight them for you. We'll get you what you deserve. That's all they do at Franklin and Frankel. That's right. They're going to be your big toe. Exactly right.

Check them out, 214-817-333333. Look, the world needs heroes okay? Franklin Frankel understands that so personal injury attorneys the Frankles 214-817-3333-3333 So we're at a sit-in on the road today With Josh Ewen we've been here before and We'll get a roadie. We'll get more into your scene during closing remarks.

But if you wanted to chime in on this, feel free. If you don't, then do whatever you want. This is your thing. So we have some viewer mail birthdays. Just a couple at last check. Let's see if any others have trickled in. Let's see if any others have trickled in. We have Voyager of the Venusian Valley. Familiar with that? Please wish my co-worker Brandon happy birthday. Day two, DF, all around good guy. Or it says all Around Good Gay. I don't know if that's a misprint

or he's trying to be funny. His heroes are Convenience Store Romance Dan, Run the Ball Blake, and High T Leather Jacket Jake before he got cucked and went to the Hab. Ooh. We'd like a follow-up epi with the guy with two wives. Yeah. Yeah. In his initial interview, rather than being doubly beat down,

he was unexpectedly positive. Would like to hear the rest of the story and see picks. I have a pick. We also look forward to the upcoming bad beat confession involving Jake, fairy smut, a dark knight superhero T-shirt and Airbnb couch with Blake catching him in at the 90% Lot going on there using Can I play you some audio real quick that I forgot about more beehive productions more hypotheticals

If you ever want to discuss the finer points of project planning and control earned value management or working capital days Brandon is your guy From fat Russell Crowe. What do we got? Quick there's the A's have a new player. Oh, yeah, I heard the first one yet. Let's see Rounding third is Langoliers. He will score. Nick Kurtz. Welcome to Major League Baseball. Okay, I think they did a decent job there. Yeah, they were warned. Because the story yesterday was they were warned. I think that was spalsacked. It probably was. Yeah, they weren't warned. But I do want to keep track of it throughout the year.

Nick Kurtz. Yeah. It's not as bad as the name of Steve Kerr's kid. It is. His name is Nick Kerr. What a cruel life to handsome one. Also happy 27th birthday shout out to my son Sam Schindler. Leaders are non-alcoholic Jake and Run the Ball Blake. More Sarah Heppela, but only if she fires that shirt off. More Jasmine, more Roast Twins.

Sam's goal is to be the first band that the Roast Twins cannot roast because they will actually love their music. A punk band in Denton called The Deep End. Doesn't exist. Oh, buddy. It's loud stuff that young people with nose rings seem to enjoy. PS as a fan of Elite Rides DFW, one huge selling point is that you seem to skip is that they have a limo license which means it's perfectly fine to enjoy alcoholic

beverages while they drive you to a place. Alright. Wow. Okay. Now that is elite. That's from Rob Schindler. Our guy. Good dude. Can't believe he has a 20. He does look way younger than he must be. Or he just had a kid when he was 13. He looks like the type of guy who could have got somebody pregnant when he was 13.

Yeah. You know what I mean. Do you guys all remember the name? Maybe you, in my case, I haven't thought of really or talked to him in 25 or 30 years. But do you guys remember the kids that you went to junior high with who had the biggest dicks? Yeah, because you saw him.

I know, but I'm saying, do you remember, like, right now, is there a name? Yeah. And almost even an image where you can be like, I remember that guy's ginormous 11-year-old cock. Yeah. And you'll be 40. You'll be 80.

And you'll still be like, how did Bruce in fifth grade have a penis that long? Yeah. I can picture it right now. Yeah, so can I. Just flopping around, walking around. Just so afraid it's going to be on your face at some point. Yes, afraid.

Oh no, he's hazing me! Don't haze me! Hey, I'm a freshman though. All these other guys. No, dude, you're just on the freshman team. You're 18. Stop trying to get slapped. Today's celebrity birthdays start with YouTube weatherman

Frankie McDonald is 40. Cool. Good for him. Cool, indeed. John Wiley Price, 75. Your man downtown. You would love JWP Heart Attack Man. Is that right? Just your... What is he up to? Uh, classic, uh,

wrong side of the tracks congressman who's dirty as hell and like won an election in jail. He was, uh, Clay Davis, right? He was Clay, yeah. It's just that. He's got an excursion vehicle with his name on the side of it real big. It's great. Sam Hurd, 40. Whoa. Honestly, probably had some dealings with John Wiley Price. That was a crazy story, man. Is he in the clink? Dude, I think he's right. He's either out or very close to it. Let's see.

Does he want to watch the draft with us? I remember he got out. Got out in February of 2023. He was kind of T.O.'s guy. I remember in training camp when Sam Hurd was a rookie. Yeah, like I see a lot of them. T.O. took him under his wing. Let's book him. Let's book Sam Hurd was a rookie. Yeah, like I see a lot of them. T.O. took him under his wing. Let's book him.

Let's book Sam Hurd for sure. Dammit, I had another story today I meant to get to. We got tomorrow, cause there's another guy I wanna book. Charlie Ward. The Heisman winner? Yeah. And New York Nick? Yes, because currently the Warriors,

Blind Fortress, whatever, are you aware of Pat Spencer? Who? Pat Spencer, no. So the Warriors have a guy who's 28 years old, who gets minutes in the playoffs, like he had a two-way converted at the end of the year. This is a white guy who is 6'3, 205. He's about 10 pounds of muscle away from me. He has a mustache. He played basketball in high school, and then not again for four years in college, where he was the top ranked lacrosse player in the country.

With his one year of grad eligibility, he went back and played basketball for one year at Northwestern, and had like OK numbers. And he's in the NBA now. And he's only like 6'3"? Dude, he looks like he's 6'3", 205. He's got a mustache. He looks like any guy that you would see at one of our events.

He's not particularly quick. Is his uncle a change GM or something? I can't figure it out. But he was the number one ranked college lacrosse player. But didn't play basketball in college until his fifth year. Is this your news story that you want to do tomorrow? Yeah, I mean, that's what made me think of Charlie Ward. Like somebody said, you know.

But at least he played basketball. I'm glad we got it out of the way today. This is a top ranked. So you did the story? This is a top ranked white. I want to know more about it. I'd love to know how this happens. So by tomorrow, we might know more.

Just do what's next. I'm just trying to tell you guys interesting stuff and everybody's being an asshole about it. But you teased him for tomorrow. I didn't. Whatever. Tease? What are you, cat?

Like we've got to follow some rules of how to win and how to talk about things. We do need to increase our TSO. I just thought it was interesting. Jerry Judy, 26. Judy. Where is he currently? Cleveland. He's a current Cleveland Brown.

He had one big game, right? He had a good year it a good year overall? I don't yeah like 1200 yards One good game is a good year for the Cleveland Browns Who we picking tonight Is it Travis Hunter Do you see Travis Hunter why don't we go to this guy for reaction? Tonight? What do we call Rose? What are you doing tonight?

Yeah, you want to jump on the screen? Yeah, I'll be around. We'll get him and Rose on, see what they think. Oh, hey. You're not willing to go with me in the fact that this guy is in the NBA and the playoffs right now is an insane accomplishment for a white. No, the story you told sounded crazy.

There's got to be more. Tune in tomorrow for more. Possibly, I swear to God. Amazing stories of white people. Da, da, da, da, da, da. Watch our subscriber count just go through the roof. They got to hear the episode tomorrow. I'm going episode book this motherfucker don't go on your heads which I'm not sure you could do

former Ranger Carlos Beltran is 48 do you know he was a Ranger yeah one year 52 years 52 games I didn't didn't like that former Ranger Omar Vizquel is 58. Played 62 games for the Rangers. Yeah, I forgot about him too. I think he helped Elvis along early in his career. Yeah. Chipper Jones 53. Didn't help him hit. Barbara Streisand is 83. I believe she has cloned dogs. Mecha Streisand.oned dogs Mika Streisand That's actually the Streisand effect great reference. I can close your door Eric Boghossian is 72. Oh, yeah talk radio talk radio and uncut gems

Which may be my favorite movie Who is he an Uncut Gems? I mean he's like the guy that he's dealing with that he's trying to... He was a politician in something. Nothing you watched? Do you know who he is? No. Like I can't remember if it was The Morning Show. There's something I was really stoked on in the last few years.

He played a presidential candidate. Billions. Stranger Things? Oh, is it billions? Yeah, remember? Succession. He was Bernie Sanders in Succession. Succession!

Gil or something? Yes, yes. Michael O'Keefe is 70. Michael O'Keefe? That's Danny in Caddyshack. Do you take drugs, Danny? Every day. Glenn Morschauer is 66, he was on 24.

Cedric the Entertainer is 61. Aidan Gillen is 57. You know him from Game of Thrones and The Wire. I think that's Karsetti. Yeah. Or Karketti. Who was in Game of Thrones? Littlefinger.

Wow, OK. Rory McCann is 56. The Hound in Game of Thrones. Joe Curious, 33. You guys know him. That's Steve from stranger things God we're still doing it. He's awesome Are they are they making another season? I believe so I think the final good God

You fired up. It's about time for you to get in Yeah, get caught up Alexis Ohanian Are they not having to cover receiving 30 hours of AOL in the mail for free yet? Where are they culturally? They can't still be in. They're waiting in line for gas. I think the hostages in Iran end up

going to the underground world. Enough already. And eight has to try to get him out. Eleven meets Ilyin Gonzalez in a very special episode of Strangers In The Sky. Yeah, the well girl. Eleven helped the girl out of the well. The baby, baby Jessica. Made her some waffles.

Alexis Ohanian is 42. That's a man named Alexis. Oh I think I know. No go ahead. Go ahead. Founder of Reddit. Founder of Reddit. Wow. And Serena's husband. That's right. While we're on the topic of all time putting up numbers whites. That's a good one. That's got to be a good one. You know girls, even girls with money, like guys with money. It's crazy. Yeah, like she doesn't need the money. How about she just marries one of us? No. For some reason, boy, when she gets it moving, it must be something to watch. Oh my god. Dude, no. I mean, think about it.

Mackenzie Bezos tried this. She's like, I got all the money in the world. I don't need it. I'm just going to be with a guy who's a good dude. And she was around his broke ass for like 18 months. And was like, this guy sucks. Yeah. Again, what did you, a teacher?

OK. Phil Robertson is 79. Duck Dynasty? Back to back days. Duck Dynasty. Says here, homophobic comments. Which I'm appalled. He's the one who was the-

The guy from Duck Dynasty? He's the impetus of the Bill Burbitt, where he's talking about Donald Sterling, and then he gets into that, and he's like, when you found this guy in a boat in a marsh in Louisiana at like 75, he's against gay marriage. Shocking.

Was this the quarterback? They did have one that played at like Ulamon, but it's not the one who's 79 today. No, the reason I remember is he played at Law Tech and he beat out Terry Bradshaw. Oh, the dad. Yeah. Oh, it might be him.

Wow. Yeah. Oh, this might be him. Wow. Interesting. Microphone? Oh, other way around. Let's look it up. Kelly Clarkson, 43. Do you not have a comment on her? I don't know anything about her.

Your general position that we're accepting famous women to just kind of keep growing physically. Oh, is she real fat? Yeah, she's. I'm not against fat, dude. She was a skinny hot on Idol. Then she got fat. And everyone's like, why are you fat?

And she's like, I like being fat. And now she's just a fat girl. It's Elaine. Yeah, trust me. So when you see pictures of her, you probably probably. I played a park in the lane, you know what I'm saying? When she puts pictures in the profile, it's probably for the neck up.

Collar bones up. Drummer Doug Clifford is 80. You know what he loves? Day like today. CCR? Oh my god. Absolutely. Credence. Love some rain. Yeah this does feel like a credence day. Doesn't it feel like playing a little credence on the drive home today? Yeah. Yeah. I'd love to crank some fortunate sun on the way home. Then you got the windshield wipers like go perfectly with the song like that's how they've timed up each one of their songs I you know their metronome. I have I had the idea for the product the app many years ago

You should be able to easily sync that Your winch of wipers with whatever song and your blinker. That's a great idea It should just be like a like exactly like what's the deal where you hum the tone and you figure it out? Shazam. They should have that basically. Anytime you're listening to something it syncs up to the beats per minute of your... That's a great one.

I know. I do think I am a kind of a dork that I'll wait to turn the blinker on when the beat drops. I know, but sometimes it doesn't time out because the tempo's off a little bit. No, it's a little off, a little tiny bit, but yeah. With my product. That's great. Yeah. Thanks man full of them Musician Patty Shemmel is 58 From hole

They were on a tour who'd they open for probably bush corn There you go. Hole. This woman looks exactly. Hole and Bush are both openers by the way. This woman looks exactly like Nancy Pelosi. Patty Shemel. Yeah. Look it up. Up tops. And Jack Quaid is 33. That's our feature birthday of the day beating out Steve Harrington from Stranger Things, Jack Quaid, Huey from the Boys. Remember, you're going to be hearing a lot about Jack Quaid for the rest of your life. He looks like it because I think he's... I did like the last episode where the Hulk couldn't turn a different color after they traded his favorite basketball player. He

was just constantly green and he couldn't get it. He started turning purple. Yeah, no. Super weird. Mine was just at the end where that sort of ancillary character found out that he's part of the 86% that Ownwell can save money on their property taxes, offering a rare moment of resolution

in this show full of conflict. I know this is big fun and games. I'm just trying to help you guys. I'm trying to give you a good show. So is own well. Good entertainment, something that you can do a little escaping the regular world's problems. The weirdest was when Batman's son became an incel and did a school shooting. Or when the Riddler took credit for the tariffs. The Riddler, classic superhero.

Born on the day now dead, Robert Thomas, he was the founder of the farmer's almanac. So smooth, right? When you think he was alive, any year. Oh, buddy. So I don't know, that's like a pretty gentile, So smooth right when you think he was alive any year. Oh Buddy So I don't know that's like a pretty Gentile like that feels like an American name when they invent The founders on the farmers almanac, but then it seems very Me 1850. I'm gonna go I'm gonna say 1710

He was alive from 1766 to 1846. Okay, not bad. So no one really got it, but you're nibbling around. I was thinking that. It's kind of funny to me just to imagine a guy in 1780 being named Rob Thomas. It just doesn't... Robert Thomas, former cowboy linebacker. There you go.

And born in the state of the dead, Richard Donner, the director of the original Superman. And he ate all those they ate all those people on the airplane. Speaking of the Donner party, that Superman documentary that came out and you watched it, right? We talked about it a little bit, but I don't remember if it was just a trainer trailer. Yeah, I think I watched it after. How about that Pee-wee doc coming up is pretty timely for us. I did see the Pee-wee doc. I'll watch it.

When's it drop? Next month on HBO. Okay. I'm very fired up. I'm sure Hulu is rolling the Varney one out any day now. It's a behind the scenes of Ernest goes to Africa. Yeah, no. Verne. Kind of a deep dive. Verne, like you've never heard him before.

Know what I mean, Verne? Dead on this day, still dead. Estee Lauder. That's a person, apparently. And I learned that at 206. Cosmetics entrepreneur, it says here. And Robert Persig, the author of Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance.

Heard of it, but I never. Is that a good book? It is. Is it? I read it as a young man. It's about larger themes in life. I assume Indeed, okay You got to keep your motorcycle maintained bro kind of feels like gay

No, well, yeah, maybe but just kind of feels like Jordan Peterson before Jordan Peterson You familiar with his work Heart attack. Oh Clean your bed in the morning. And that is today in history. Oh yes. The guy that says make your bed first thing in the morning. Exactly.

All right. Talk to you tonight. Well that is today in history. Earl Browns. That's right, tonight, our live stream, we'll have some Lone Star Beer there. Wanna remind you, you can actually get some merch at lonestarbeer.com, thumbzone21,

is the promo code for 21% off. But this is now closing remarks, and we've been here before at this home of Josh Ewen which is we understand kind of at least financially set up by the wife right? Yeah, I'm a stay at home. You're a stay at home? With no kids. I wanted to say stay at home dad yeah you're a stay at home husband. Yeah. Um, and this is brought to us by our trip out to the Byron Nelson. You're, uh, your state. What do you got May 2nd? No, I'm going to listen to y'all. Well, you're booked, right? The fun is Friday,

May 2nd, the CJ Cup, Byron Nelson with the dumb zone and the mom games Roy's will be out there as well live from the 17th hole that's one to four thanks to Tito's handmade vodka bring your crew and experience world-class golf as the pros take on TBC TPC Craig ranch that's May 1 through 4 the tournament has it all incredible food cold drinks and an unbeatable atmosphere soak up the Sun make some memories you catch every swing with us at one of the most exciting stops in the PGA Tour. Tickets are on sale now at www.thecjcupbyronelston.org. Kids under 15, free with an adult.

Do not miss out. Tito's Handmade Vodka is an official sponsor of the CJ Cup Byron Nelson. Stop by this Tito's Clubhouse at the 17th hole. Raise a Tito's transfusion to your day on the green distilled and bottled by fifth generation incorporated Austin Texas 40% alcohol by volume saver responsibly. We'll see there. That's gonna be a lot of fun. So yeah we're in Fort Worth. We're here a year ago and I do have memories. I remember last year it feels like there was a cat

attacking us yes I don't remember attacking me I have a cat that is it was a aggressive and my brother-in-law couldn't keep it so then they were you're gonna basically put it down so I said I'll keep it and I basically trained it to not be insane but it's still a little crazy like but I haven't seen it today it's the storm it's scared of the storm it's under it's still a little crazy. But I haven't seen it today. It's the storm. It's scared of the storm. It's hiding under a bed right now. It's the only reason it's not out here being a pain.

It came out here when y'all were talking to Kevin earlier. It peaked out for a second. It must have liked his voice. And then it was taken back out when the thunder started. What a difference a year makes. The last time we were here, the Mavs were up 3-0 on the Timberwolves. I was about to say, yeah, it was the peak.

I thought about it. It was the peak. It was Lucas' peak in hindsight. They were up 3-0, he had freaking Clown Go-Bear. Yes. And then, you know, I didn't realize at the time, but that was the best moment I guess I'm gonna get with Luca.

That's crazy. Yeah, Josh has like the Luca shrine he's got like six seven pairs of Luca like in a case. He's got the the Funko doll, the bobbleheads, the candle, the jerseys. People just started giving me Luca stuff as the default you know instead of cowboy stuff people would know that I love Luca and would just give me Luca stuff for Christmas, birthdays. We don't have to talk about Luca.

Are you still a Mavs fan? No. Fuck no. Laker? Man, I tried. I'm definitely still cheering for Luca, and I want him to do well. And I've tried the playoffs.

I couldn't watch any regular season. I tried to start watching again in the playoffs. It's just not the same. That's exactly how I feel, man. It's not. I can't just be a fan of the Lakers. Like I hate, you don't want the Lakers to do well but... I hate the Lakers too I should say. I can't stand the Lakers. But Luca, I love him so much that I will be grudgingly root for the Lakers to win

all their games because that would make Luca, that would make Luca's life better. Yeah. That's what I want. I think that's where we all come down on it. Because for me, I just, I don't, it's not even like that I hate LeBron, but I don't like rooting for a LeBron team. That's a harder thing for me than the Lakers. Because I just never viewed myself as like a guy who, I was not like a big Jordan guy. You didn't like to root for him against the ultra stacked warriors when they added Durant? When they added Durant, I did.

OK. And that was really fun, especially when they came back. But I don't know, I just never was like a guy who growing up was a fan of the best team. I know it sounds weird because I was a Cowboy fan, but they sucked after the time I was 10. Well, plus you lived in your backyard. Yeah, exactly.

But I was never just, I don't know, it just feels weird to root for LeBron to me. And he doesn't feel like Luca is him at all. They're very different. They carry themselves very different. But it will make it worse for Nico, the more success Luca has. The other thing I remember about being here is I believe I changed your toilet paper was hanging the wrong way.

Right. That did happen to you, yes. And I told these guys that I changed it and they said I'm weird. Which I didn't even notice, honestly. It was just a thing that it was random. It wasn't an issue, but it is kind of weird to change somebody's toilet paper now that you said it. It was hanging with the back towards the wall and I just think it needs to hang outward

and I just thought I was doing you a favor and then I got emails saying they probably did that on purpose because cats will be able to just pull the toilet paper down and I knew your cat was nuts so I figured okay that's probably why they did that and now they have toilet paper all over their house. But that was yesterday, I'm not there anymore. I won't worry about it. I'll never be back and now here I am a year later, our annual trek to Josh Ewen's. Right. Yeah. Actually, last, so April 17th was my birthday and you did a birthday thing for me because Blake had contacted me. I booked this like months ago, like it was like nine months ago,

I was like I wanna do it again because the first one didn't go like I wanted it to. So I was like, give my actual birthday, Blake contacted me, said that there's gonna be like this golf tournament that y'all got an invite to and just cannot delay it a week. And I was like, that's fine, it's no big deal, I got free time, so why not?

I said I'll do it to help your show, I'm just trying to help your show. Yeah, yeah, it's your birthday month anyway. And basically, and I agree, but I thought it would have been funny if you said that I abdicated my birthday for your show. I just thought the abdicated part would have been funny. But then when you did the thing, you were just said, yeah, Blake's friend, uh, said that it was his birthday and I just gave him a shout out.

It was just the way you did. It was hilarious. I thought it was pretty funny. Classic Dan. It was very cause you said it's Josh Newman's birthday and then give him a shout out it was just the way you did it was hilarious I thought it was pretty funny classic Dan it was very because you said it's Josh Hewitt's birthday and then crickets and shakes like who it was just very good so you said last year it didn't go the way you wanted it to yeah well it was was it his fault no no it was um it was more cat related actually right when the show started the the cat scratched my hand. So I was in there putting a bandaid on. I vaguely remember that.

And then I heard the theme. Basically he's playing as I'm like, this cat just like scratched my hand and the theme starting in there. I'm like, this is great. I just got all this set up and I'm in here bandaging a wound when the show's starting. Cats out here harassing. But it threw me off. I had stuff written down that I wanted to do and I forgot to bring my notes over and I basically just didn't do any of it

I had a good joke about Reggie Miller doing the broadcast with Ant-Man's cock in his mouth and how does he do it like running up and down the court because he's got it on him so bad he's probably still the same way well you got the notepad now yeah Yeah. Well, OK. Let me just go through it, because I did write this down. Are these this year's notes, or these are from last year still? It's a kind of a recreation, because I threw them out, and then I realized I probably need to write some good stuff

again. OK. I had a joke. I realized I was writing jokes, actual jokes. They're kind of somewhat artisanal, because they're like targeted ads, how they're very specific. Yeah,'re very specific yeah okay a micro joke I realized that I was writing jokes very specific to this group right here now you realize also this group right here is not a good group to be telling jokes to oh I'm definitely aware that

definitely could not go over the outward laughter right yes even if I think something's hilarious I get be emitted yeah That's why we have sound bites. Yeah. I'm definitely aware that it's not going to be a welcoming warm embrace. Like this. Let me just, let me go from the start then. Last time you were here, I think Dan, your power was out. I believe, Blake, you definitely had a section of your fence down Jake definitely struggling with your own thing too I'm sure I'm not what

it was we didn't know at the time but it sounded like it was pretty serious and um I don't know if you overheard this but Jake was hot we started talking about the Netflix series tires which had just come out uh-huh and I was asked Jake is it funny and he said yeah I watched it twice but you know I'm superhuh and I was asked Jake is it funny and he said yeah, I watched it twice, but you know, I'm super fan And I thought about it It's like after having you out of my house now twice I think I'm prepared to say that that is probably the gayest thing I've ever heard You can't go around calling yourself a super fan for another man. That's just oh, I thought he was going a different way

I thought he was saying after having you guys out here. Now. I'm a super fan No, because I'm not gay never say that that is I am a different way. I thought he was saying after having you guys out here, now I'm a super fan. He's like, no, because I'm not again. I would never say that. No, I am a big fan. I'm a supporter. I should never say that again. That's a weird thing to say, but I'm a super fan. Super fan of Shane, right?

Yeah. Yeah. Also wasn't really a joke, but. No, that's not the, oh, that was something I just wanted to, yeah, that's not it. That's not a joke but no that's not the only something I just wanted to yeah that's not it okay mark the joke parts now I know on the sheet put joke I would actually if I could like to start with an apology and a point of clarification okay last time y'all were here I gave gave Dan a gift. It was a it was an artwork of like a children's book. Yeah. And it was there was a lot of stuff on it. And I just want to point out what I was

trying to emphasize was there was a point when Jake was getting ready for court and Dan was playing with his kid and he thought to himself, family. And so there's a Fast and the Furious reference in the artwork. I just want to make sure that y'all understand that was what I was trying to emphasize in that particular piece of art. Do you remember what this was? The Fast and the Furor, right?

Right, and I was also wanting to say that I do as categorically denounce Nazis and Nazi ideology. Anyone who knows my character knows. You don't have a job to get canceled from. I just want to make sure it's clear. Bingo. I'm not in any way supporting Nazis or Nazi ideology that's always been you're supporting comedy trying to I don't know right fast nine any fast in the furor yes and it was fast night was a rock and

Dom and then there was the back to the Future car and then there was Hitler. But that was, he was a historical figure. And that was, you know, I'm not endorsing, I just want to say now more than ever, Nazis are bad. Stalin bad too. Well yeah, Stalin was, not the point. You didn't have to have the oven in the background. What's next?

Oh Jesus, I didn't even get what you were just saying. Also the other gift I gave to Jake, it was, oh man, Cameron had a drink. Cameron, I think is who it was? Cameron or whatever his name is. Oh yeah, the sex drink. The sex drink, yeah. Which it works. Oh, you know now?

Because the thing is, you referenced it multiple times in the year since, and I feel like when you referenced it, you were always saying like, man, I don't know if I've got it in me anymore. And I kind of feel like that drink might have been what led you to accept your own mortality and maybe eventually get sober. I was saved by Cameron. I thought that stuff might kill me, but instead all it did is just made me rock hard. Damn, it really works. I'm glad you built up the the health to do it. That's great

I think it was what pushed you to get sober though. He's healthy enough for sex again. That's right on the fake turf And I gave Blake some coffee that apparently wasn't very good. Sorry about that The coffee was the throne coffee that I wasn't mad at you, I was mad at Throne. That was, that was too bad. I don't have any other gifts this time though. That's okay. Presents is a present.

No, you bought us lunch, thank you. So, do y'all actually wanna hear a joke? Should I do the joke? I think we've made it this far. I've been waiting on it. You wanna hear it? Yes. All right, so.

Have the sound ready. My wife and I, we built this house, you know, right? I've told you all about that. When I was building this house, actually, is what kind of made me start listening to the show. That's why I tied together. It was hog court. And it was what first got me really just invested in listening all the time. It was just the weirdest thing. And y'all brought in a judge, right?

To determine whether the hog was worthy of $1,000 right too much help too much help yeah but the thing is that's when I started listening to their show in the morning and for whatever reason the app and there they had the picture of them I had their their faces and their voices backwards for years, not knowing that it was the Epstein thing that finally made me realize that I had their voices backwards in my head, it's just a random thing. You can cut that out if you want, that's not the joke.

I don't understand what's happening. But I was just saying the point was, when we built this house, I was listening to how court is what made me start listening. So my wife brought- We were his gateway to the Musers. Got it. Sort of.

Unique story. We're just listening all the time. I started listening to y'all all the time, basically. That was the point. Because it was available on the ad. So my wife brought her mother-in-law here during construction to look at the place. And she was walking through the front of the house

and there was a bunch of boards with nails and she said to her mom, hey mom, be careful over there, okay? And she said to her mom, Hey, mom, be careful over there. Okay. And she said, her mom turned to her and said, growing up in my village, when I went to the river for water, I had to look out for tigers. You don't have to tell me to be careful. And I thought a couple things really number one, that's pretty badass for your mother in law to say it's kind of scary. It's also way too aggressive a response to hey mom be

careful. This is true yeah you don't need to unpack it all right there. But the point of the thing is though like I can do her when I did her voice I didn't put on any kind of like inflection or anything right? Like I was just there was no Liam Neeson twist on no Hoya like I can convey her words without doing anything and they still have power right but here's the thing y'all might not know is when my wife does her voice you think she puts any kind of inflection on it because she does a perfect impression of her mom every time they all do and by they I mean her two brothers and her sister. They all

do this spot on impression of their mom. What is her origin? They are Hmong. Which you could just say they're Asian. They're Hmong. Okay. And so yeah she has. So you're wondering why you can't do it? Well the thing is like my point about like every guy does an impression of their wife, like every husband, you know, like the trash. That's pretty common. Right. How big of a stretch is it to do an impression of your wife doing an impression of her mom? Like, is it too much or I'm ready for it? Yeah, that's right. Are you greasing the skids for that or what?

What are we doing? Well, I was just kind of wanting to get what y'all thought as far as like, should that be allowed or? Of course it's allowed. It's course it's allowed. I mean, you're being supported by her daughter. You got a lot going for you. Just play fast and loose. Do it now. Well, I don't understand why they kicked me out of Easter dinner then because I thought it was going over great. Okay, alright. Okay, alright. What? I liked it. I liked it too.

I have a really dirty one. There's four. If you actually want to hear a really dirty one, the punchline kind of, I don't know, it's up to y'all. I don't want to keep going if you think it's dumb. I feel like we wouldn't be responsible broadcasters if we now signed off and didn't let anybody hear your dirty jet. Like if you stuck with this this long, I think you want to hear, I think, those listening want to hear the dirty one All right, let's do the dirty one then real quick like I can I'll make it quick So I went to school in the Bay Area briefly and when I was there

I was dating this girl who lived in San Francisco and she lived on the 12th story of this old building and She had this little rent controlled apartment and it was kind of a weird setup where she had this small unit and then the rest of the half like half of the rest was it was a war heroes retirement home for war heroes and the other half was this pilot program they had for gifted orphans special gifted orphans program. So I was over there one night and we were kinda just like

starting to mess around a little bit. Things were getting a little hot and we was going in one direction, obviously what was gonna happen. And then we started smelling smoke and it was just like, what the hell is that? And we looked at the door and there was smoke coming in under the door.

And at that point, we'd get kinda scared. 12th floor. We go out there. The freaking kids are starting to come out. The freaking old people are coming out. It's starting to fill up with smoke. We're like there's only we go to the stairs and they're completely engulfed in flame on this side. Can't get out that way. Go to the other stairs. They're starting to kind of fill up with flame, too.

So we got to get some freaking fire extinguishers turns out all the fire extinguishers have been taken they were gone so at that point what are we gonna do I'm seeing panicked kids the freaking old people and I knew that there was only one thing that was gonna work as far as getting this fire out and getting everyone out of there so I told the freaking like, all right, war heroes, cover up those kids faces. They don't need to see what's about to happen. And so luckily, like I said, the lady and I had kind of been

going that direction anyway, she was kind of worked up a little bit. And she just happened to have the ability that y'all have referenced on the show to show a few times she was a squirter. And so I'll spare you the details of what actually happened, but every child, man, woman and child made it out of there that day unscathed. But they never did get that stairwell smell quite right again. It was. Jesus.

What is that? It's a mic drop. Josh Ewen, thank you for having us at your house. Opening for Kevin Farley, perhaps, tomorrow and Friday night. It will be Josh Ewen thanks dude adios mofo They give opinions with confidence Just like three friends that sit in, sometimes they sit out At a house way across town In Mesquite, grapevine, or flower mound They said we're gonna do our show any way we want Cumulus tried to cancel them for about a month Those were some lonely days on such time spent Airways And I think it's gonna be a little weird

To tune into my favorite station for 14 years To not hear voices I always hear Say no, no, no, no I don't want audio Dom's own boys, blending sports, comedy, and news They took their time and paid their dues Three cool dudes to take a leap And leave the place where you know their voice not their face

Oh no, well maybe don't let him eat the napkin Dumb Zone Boys somehow pulled it off What a life to just get paid to talk It's more than just a podcast It's a comedy show Everyone was wondering what would happen If the Hang Zone didn't show Well I guess we'll never know They have guests like local stars

Sarah Heppler, Danny Bayless Who now just owns a bar Some 690s sit-ins who wanna be cool Like that deep Bellam actor, what a tool No, no, no, no So what are you walking out dumb zone boys are now so independent they can say whatever don't be offended if you have a bit they are cool just send it damn love salmon and broccoli Jake drinks water jumps and bakes broccoli

Break hits, bombs on the course Kemp spins and Pro Bowl divorce Heart attack man and lovely book reports And business reports Dan has both jeans and business shorts He's back in guy, but so am I It makes sense if you're in a bind Don't forget about the roast twins They will demolish your spirit in two minutes From the Den Haag, a top dance garage Filled with dicks and a fan base that also rocked Entourage So subscribe today, it's only $6.90

Two and a half hours of quality content and comedic timing The Dumb Zone Podcast.