The Dumb Zone FREE - Rory McIlroy wins his Masters, Jim Nantz is insufferable, and Jared Sandler on why the Rangers bats are struggling | DZ 4-14-25

Episode Date: April 14, 2025

Get every episode of The Dumb Zone by subscribing to DumbZone.com or Patreon.com/TheDumbZoneComedian, Vinnie Corrales, sits in with us today as we recap our weekends and Blake talks about his trip to Denver last week. Jim Nantz is so self-absorbed it's disgusting and what does the Connecticut attic boy know about chicks? (00:00) - Open: Weekend check (52:00) - Sports: Jim Nantz is insufferable (01:21:42) - News: Connecticut attic boy (01:47:05) - Jared Sandler: Rangers bats slumping (02:17:04) - VM birthdays/Today in History ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Hello! I'm professional broadcaster Dan McDowell, letting you know that you are about to hear one of our free podcasts. But if you'd like to subscribe at DumbZone.com, you'll get four shows per week, plus the weekend wrap-up and any bonus sodes like our Business Wednesday interviews. So, if you forgot how to use the 15-second rewind, that's DumbZone.com to subscribe. That's dumbzone.com to subscribe. Now on to today's program. Elite Rides DFW Dan. That is our preferred ride share and it is a share. It's a shared experience between you and Elite Rides. Hit them up at 844RIDE DFW or you can download their app. It uses AI, Dan. Dumb Zone listener endorsement email from Tom, who said, I let Elite Rides know

it's all about the Dumb Zone. They took my boy Troy to his junior prom over the weekend. Yeah. Very safe, no worries. On time. On time they have a fleet. I put a picture in our run sheet so you can look at it. A fleet, I saw it, it's very nice. Corporate executive shuttles, spacious SUVs, mini buses. It's great for the weekend if you're heading out to a big concert, you're heading out

to a sporting event, tossing a couple of pops back. So yeah, Elite Rides, as you see here, a listener, they took his son to his prom date. If you and your girl have a prom date coming up, we don't judge. Elite Rides DFW at 844RIDE.DFW. Promo code DZ15 for 15% off your first ride. DZ15, 15% off your first ride. The preceding and the following content

are brought to you by No puppet productions and the dumb zone Who's the band? Brand new well. I just heard Jake on the dumb zone, so you really feel good about giving your money to a pedophile Yes, he stayed home that night no he guilted you out of it now. You're not me. This is bullshit No, he guilted you out of it. Now you're putting it on me. This is bullshit. You're only doing this because you know I win. I know, and I had to listen to your review of it.

It's so sad. Dude. All right, all right, all right, all right, all right. All right, all right, all right, all right. That was a great spot. You were on what a Monday. It was a hot start. We're off to a good start here. We're in our downtown Dallas studios DZ TV the Fox 4 building

home of Peyton Yeager Home of your friend Peyton Yeager home of our friend Steve Noviello More on Steve Noviello. More on Steve Noviello tomorrow. Are we gonna bring him in? Moron. Should we bring him in? Yeah, see what he's got going on. I'm pro Noviello.

He might just go home after the show. Blake is back. Whoa! Remember that guy? Yeah. Look at them all. can I say something? Probably not While I find him to truly be all Blakey the most important part of our operation I

Think I'm feeling slightly better about where things are Right now than I ever have before because this whole thing didn't burn to the ground. I tried my best never to call you. Like I'm trying to give you, like make it feel like you can actually disconnect from this, but then you would text me and. He only texts us and hits us up so he can complain later that he had to work during his vacation.

So I try to ignore the texts, but no, Copeland did great. He did a great week of shows. We discovered that one of the days you were gone was the anniversary of the eclipse. Yeah. That makes sense. He just leaves that week every year.

I didn't even want to talk about the anniversary. I wanted nothing to do with it. But I missed Luca. That was sad. That was wild, dude. We all missed Luca. That was sad. That was wild, dude. We all miss Luca. I have some, every Monday I have new Luca thoughts. I actually do. But we should mention we have a full studio today. Look over there. It's our good friend Vinny Corrales. Yeah!

Hello! Hola todos! What is that cube you got today? Five by five by five. you're just showing off now You can from the boys. I can't hear anything in my headphones of it. Oh Nobody no snare in my headphones. Yeah Welcome back. We are we welcome in as perfect as we said we welcome in local comedians if they have some side bit like Jimmy on the side fights fires and saves dead people and he does advance.

Saves live people from being dead. Yeah, I suppose that's a better way to put it. Jimmy will tell me like some crazy stories. He'll show me some crazy videos of things that I'm probably. Yeah, he's probably not supposed to be showing today. Yeah, he should be showing. He's probably like, hey, make sure you mention that I show you this. Yeah, that probably was not supposed to be showing today. Yeah, he should be showing me. He's probably like, hey, make sure you mention

that I show you this. Yeah, that's the best. If you had a, well, I guess now it's just all on the internet, but my brother used to send me some wild stuff when he was deployed in Iraq. That was a weird thing. There was a, you know, back in the day, same stuff has been happening forever.

It's just all of a sudden we had guys in Iraq with Wi-Fi all the time. Yeah, but Gallo's humor will never die. That's, you know, that's... But Elon says it's back. Oh, it's legalized now. Comedy's legal again. Cool.

Vinny at the Addison Improv. Headlining Addison Improv. Thursday night. April 24th, next Thursday. Oh, next Thursday. Next Thursday. I thought it was this Thursday. Nice. No, next Thursday, yeah, so you guys got time. I next Thursday. Next Thursday. I thought it was this Thursday. Nice. No next Thursday, yeah so you guys got time.

I could swing that. Yeah, I don't think we're gonna have Blake's friend do any stand up on this one. Oh yeah, Vinnie would help facilitate that when my buddy lost our fantasy football league. Oh. He did a five minutes of standing. He wasn't that bad.

Actually didn't do that bad. That sucks. Cause you know that, cause that guy's just walking around now like I could do it if I wanted. Yeah it wasn't even punishment at that point. His chest was puffed out. That sucks because you know that because that guy's just walking around now This chest was puffed out We also have in our Fox four studios Kara and Ty Webb as he is known on internet. I Introduced him as our shareholders. Yeah

They have a piece. Taste. They have a little taste. Yeah, they are, we're their side piece. Kara, legendary, one of our legendary listeners of course, she emailed me last year and said I wanted to arrange a sit-in for her husband's 50th birthday. And this is your husband? What? Correct. I'm assuming, looks great. Damn, he looks so good. Doesn't he look great?

So good. I've seen that guy put the beers back. Vinnie, let me introduce you to the, this man is the manliest man who has ever manned. I don't know about that. Huh? Well, let's hear the evidence. Here's my evidence.

Kara, as she pointed out in the email. How are you acting surprised like you didn't know where he was headed? Do you not want me to bring this up? Because I won't. It's my bad. I will just say Kara and Ty. It's the first drive of the game and he's got the script so why don't you just but it's fine I won't

bring it up no you should I should okay but you want to feign like oh don't don't mention this and I might not if Vinnie wasn't here but he's like what's going on here so deserve to know think I deserve to know, yeah. She pointed out in the email she sent me last year, I used to be the ticket's favorite lesbian. So you might be confused by the term my husband. Also, you said I was hot on the air. We'll discuss this in the den.

Well, anyway, the point is, yes, she had a lady partner. Right? Were you married to the lady? No, but, she had a lady partner, right? Were you married to the lady? No, but we did have a child. You have a child together. Name Vinny. Whoa, are you serious? Well, her name is Vincent, but.

Her name, wow, that's cool. It's very cool. And anyway, then she met this strapping young man. Yeah. And it's like, you know what? I no longer want ladies. I need men. I didn't realize men could be like this.

This guy beat the moon and the tides and the things that control their blood. Or if you think about it, he might be just a real feminine guy because she's used to the lady and she's like, you know what? He's the gateway. This lady isn't ready enough for me. Doesn't mind being fingered.

I need, yeah, I need someone who is. Is that the first five minutes? No, we're good. No, this is like a true dog bites man, or man bites dog story, you know? Like, I feel like you hear a lot of, how old are you? 40, 40?

Okay. You hear a lot about like late 30s, early 40s women being kind of like, I'm maybe curious to what the ladies are like. Yeah, yeah, it's the other way. That's fairly common. Oh yeah, I met a couple weeks ago. It was always in the back pocket.

I was talking to somebody about that, yeah. Did you tell us about that? I did not. It's just a friend of mine who was like, you know what, she's like 40ish. I just wanna make sure if you have that sort of scene percolate notes, I'm not aware of it. No, no, no, no, no, no.

She was just like, you know what, I never really knew I could even be gay. Like growing up in Texas, I didn't know I could be gay, but now. Oh, yeah. Like now I wish I would have been open to that because I think maybe that's my game. Yeah, 100%, I get that. And I don't know, maybe I'm making some distinction

foolishly between that and just like kind of pegging somebody. Like there's a difference between saying like you want to spit, like she was raising a child with a lesbian, it's always been kind of like the hey let's make out, that's how it's like. Right, no no no, yeah she was, she's in. Yeah. She is in the game.

Right, so yeah it's a rare story. It takes a man like this, I guess. Yeah I mean that's he is a great dude though a sweet soft lady like man Like you know what now that I'm thinking about it I've known him a long time and I'm not saying like I'd leave the wife right now But like he's on the list of guys I'd feel comfortable leaving. He's a good dude He's not too hot, but he's hot, you know He's a good dude. I mean he's not too hot, but he's hot

You know now if I leave her for you the next time we come in will that be the intro boy? What a we do what a web freshen this up a little bit Or glad you guys are here Totally um I Want to do weekend check and I want to have a sponsor and I want that sponsor to be fairlease.org. Why'd you do it like that? Because I didn't know where I was going yet. I had to look at the list. Fairlease.org. Lease your next vehicle with Fairlease or at least give them a chance to earn your business. FAIR, it's right there in the name. Texas Proud, they are part of the credit union of Texas. We're all about Texas here, Dan.

Oh yeah. So sell your car, get paid fast. We got a Texas beer, Texas vehicles. That's right, Texas gummies. Fairlease.org, tunnel listeners who have done this, they'll deliver that vehicle right to your door. Maybe you wanna have it delivered to your office and show off to your work wife.

They'll do that for you. Hit them up at fairlease.org, click request a quote, and then select a dumb zone on the how did you hear about us page. You know what, maybe you don't go with Fair Lease, but I am imploring you to give them a shot to earn that business at fairlease.org, Dan. What's up on your weekend?

Clayton, you want to lead us off? Ooh, spicy. Sure, I'll lead us off. I just know he was unavailable Friday. That didn't stop you from texting me. That didn't stop? No, I thought you might be available, but then you just ghosted my text. Yep, because I was just ghosted my text. Yep. Because I was unavailable.

Went to Stillwater this weekend with the boys from college, roommates. Saw a little concert. Oh, this is ragweed? Cross-Canadian ragweed. Wow. Turnpike troubadours. Now, they can't go.

Vinny, I'm keeping a list, since since Trump is back of things that are back. So the first time I noticed this, I don't know how much you follow the NFL, the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. They were once coached by a guy named John Gruden. I'm familiar. Okay well he was in their ring of honor. But then as part of an investigation

these emails came out where he was using the F slur, he made some, I think he compared an NFL exec But then as part of an investigation, these emails came out where he was using the F slur, he made some, I think he compared an NFL exec who is black to a monkey. They removed him from that ring of honor, for shame. Okay. Gelastema. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

Well after Trump won, they just were like, hey he's back in the ring of honor. Really? Yeah. Day of, day of. It was within. At least four years he's back. Yeah, and there Day of, day of. It was within. At least four years he's back. Yeah, and there's been a couple of other things like this,

like people kind of coming out of the woodwork, like, maybe it's not so bad for me now. Yeah, I saw that there was a petition to get the Redskins to get their old name back. Yep, they gave O.J.'s Heisman back. There's a band that I was really into in high school, and the lead singer got accused of, well, not accused. He was hitting on 14-year-olds when he was 28.

They took a decade off. They're back. I think people are peeking out. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I think Cross Canadian Ragweed was theirs more. They broke up because of drugs. Or same with Turnpike. What's the story there?

Yeah, it was just kind of They all it's they've been together for I mean they've been now 30 years You know they they started 30 years ago and still water did they both play? Full original band Wow so same thing with turnpike And you know turnpike came back a few years ago But turnpike released a new album like right before the day before the concert started so that was you know, Turnpike came back a few years ago, but Turnpike released a new album like right before the day before the concert started. So that was, you know, got everybody going. I will say the recently divorced 45 to 55 year old woman

was in full force. I knew it. All right. Full force. And she wasn't hiding nothing. And she remembers this band from college. Oh, the amount of women just dancing in the aisles and stomping on the stage.

We were in the bleachers. And so it was. Was it at the football stadium? It was at Boone Pickens. Damn. Full stadium and full pit floor, everything. So it was like 48,000 to 50,000 people just, and they're all, we were the youngest.

Whites? We were like 35 and up. It was about 35 and up. Yes, you were correct. It was mostly whites. But it was. That sounds awesome. A blast.

Yeah, it was a blast getting together with the boys. Now, in keeping with the theme Did they? Sing the F slur. I don't know they didn't do the song they have a song with it Sometimes when they do the boys when they do the boys from Oklahoma, they'll use the F slur instead, right? Yeah down in Norman Yeah, there you go. Yeah go yeah we saying f slur to differentiate from f-word I think so yeah okay I don't know I've never thought about it before but yeah the bad bad one the other ones the one that we can't say

in the first couple of minutes of the stream it's just a bit of slur is the one in the dire straits money for nothing right That's the F slur. I don't remember that. Is that money, that song in, that word in those lyrics? Yeah, yeah, because it's about like the moving guys that are like making fun of, you know, the guitar player making money and they're like... Yeah, that little F slur with his own jet airplane. How did I not know that? That little F slur. I heard that word a million times. That would have made me love the song. Is a millionaire. That's crazy.

That's a, just a blind spot. Up until very recently, they were playing it on the radio uncensored, I feel like, within the last, you know, 10 years. That's wild. I started censoring it. Yeah, we talk about that all the time, like how, this is a little different,

but how skeet skeet is just, it was just all, you're in college, you're like, oh, I just mean, didn't this just come, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's's like and then the same women that are at cross-canada-ro like all skeet skeet skeet Yeah, dazzle jeans on yeah once words are like once everybody starts agreeing what this new meaning is like you're like Like rap like female rappers will not say pussy anymore. They'll say like cookie Yeah, and now but like cookie is becoming that. The censor is just like, what do I do?

Now they're bleeping out cookie in some words and you're like what? In some songs, the FCC is like losing their mind. That sounds fun Clayton. It was fun. Ninja is another one of a word that's being re-appropriated. So most of my weekend check would revolve around Friday as well. Wasn't, let me just say Snoop and Nizzle. Don't you feel like there was a time where white people were getting super?

Yeah. Dan included. I was all over my Nizzle. In 2000s, yeah. Later was informed I shouldn't say it. It was the freest pass I've... Okay, sorry Dan. Yeah.

What? I mean, what does it mean? Okay so Friday I went to the dermatologist. Friday we didn't have a show. Still did a bunch of business stuff just to let you know. We were working hard. We'd like to tell you how hard we work. Oh my gosh, business Sunday as well. So when you're an old, Ty, have you started doing the annual, you gotta go just, man, when you're an old and you got stuff growing all over you, you start to like, okay, I better go to the dermatologist every year. Okay.

Do you not do it? No, I mean mean not, no. I weren't when I was a kid. TC and I were talking about this the other day, how weird it was when you were a kid. Like I had to have a couple moles removed, you know? Which is, in hindsight, a very standard thing, but they would always say,

well, we're doing this because they could be cancerous. I'm like, everyone I know who had cancer just dot. Well, they have to cut it off and test it. But the fact they even mentioned that. Yeah, but now they're like, why are we even talking about that? Because I got stuff all over me and they're like, well, no, that's not it.

If it's black or if it's pink, I don't know. They tell me every year and then I forget like as I walk out the door. I'm like, I don't remember. No way to follow up either. No. So anyway, they actually, so I got a couple of like spots. Where is, can you see?

That side. This one? Yeah. OK. So I got these things that have just grown on my face over time. I have no idea what it is. They're like, oh, they're cool. But my wife is annoyed by them. Quality control.

And vice versa. So she's like, you should ask them to burn it off. So I said to them, can you burn it off? She goes, oh yeah. So they get out like a can, like do you ever clean your keyboard with the air can thing? Yeah, that's totally what I do with that device. Is it for like, getting high? What is it?

Oh yeah. Okay. I mean, I've done... Air cell, right? Yeah, it's been 25 years, but sure. But yeah, I know what you're talking about. But if you do it a while, then it's real cold and you can see a little frost built up, whatever. So, anyway, it's kind of like that. they just zap it and it hurts exceptionally more than they told they didn't say it would hurt at all no no I'm trying to act like I'm trying

not to be a wuss but as they're doing it's like gosh you know it's like kind of like sticking a little needle in you but they're not it's like a face tattoo yeah that what a face tattoo you might like? Probably. I don't have a tattoo. Are tattoos painful Kara? Yeah. Okay. But you're just on board? It's more painful to get them taken off. Anyway so it's pretty quick and they're like, okay, so over the next month, that'll just get black and then fall off. On all three spots? Yeah, I got this, or I got something over here inside the beard, so they sprayed that one.

And the other one's on my head, yeah. You should save them and give them away. Well, I don't, yeah. For the summer of. Yeah, auction them off for for your cause or eat them at 10k subs okay so what's the timeline of course I would what's the timeline for like a month three to four weeks what if they just fall off during the show like in mass I don't know yeah it might be like a gradual I imagine it away but if they just fall off during the show, like, in mass? Well, I don't know. Yeah, it might be like a gradual falling away. I imagine it is.

But if it just pops off, that'd be great. It'd be more like a scab, right? Like, just kind of. Yeah, get a little putty knife. And they said don't scratch it. You could spread Vaseline on it to keep you from scratching it or something. Does it itch or anything?

Like, do you want to scratch it? Not yet. Okay. Not yet. And so, number one, I was thinking, do I do this if I was just Radio Guy still? Or the fact that we're on video all the time, is that why I'm doing this?

Obviously you're registering the wife complaint at zero. Right. As far as, okay, just wondering. Yeah. Yeah, I would, you probably wouldn't. But I will tell you that much like the F slur in that Dire Straits song, I look, you probably wouldn't. But I will tell you that much like the F slur and that Dire Straits song, I look at you every day and I don't think I've ever really noticed those.

Yeah. So, I don't know. Well, anyway. If you can get it covered by insurance, I guess. I don't know, why not? I don't even know. They're like, what's your deductible? I'm like, I.

What is all this? You know, I don't know. And yeah, just. your deductible? I'm like, uh, you know, what is all this? You know, I don't know and yeah talking like RFK charge me money I'd be a funny reaction in the doctors. I just asked you for the pay And my other thing is so they were like You know Just like at the dentist They're like, you know, you should try to stop chewing tobacco. I'm like, oh, okay, yeah, I get it. So they're like, you know, you should,

you are a fair skinned individual, you should wear sunscreen every day. I'm like, yeah, yeah, I know. Every day? I do something. Yeah, you probably should. You should every day, but mine's light. I do like a...

It's like a lotion slash sunscreen. It's a lotion, it's SPF 20. Yeah, yeah. But it's every day just when I dry off Well, so I I had that same reaction that you did. Yeah, I know every day It will do so much out at the beach. It would do wonders for your aging But if you don't really Is he trying to say that I look like a prune? Sure.

Well, so she goes, also, you know, if you don't like to slather on the sunscreen, they have a pill now. I'm like, what? Whoa. She goes, oh yeah. We have a sunscreen pill and it's called whatever and you could get it online or we have it up front.

So maybe they're just trying to sell me on it because they have it for sale. How, how does that work? I don't know. And everybody I've told this about says that same thing. SPF pills. Is that a thing? It's right here.

That's insane. So for the past couple of days, over the whole weekend, I would just pop a pill. They said you gotta pop a pill, wait at whole weekend, I would just pop a pill. They said, you got to pop a pill, wait at least an hour before going out in the sun. And then I would do my afternoon walk, walkie talkie. OK, so does this replace sunscreen if you're going to be outside?

They said it could replace it. This is not a thing. What? Harvard Health says not to believe that. What the fuck do they know? They've says not to believe that. What the, what do they know? They denied the lab leak theory. My dermatologist said, I'll have to show you the exact.

T.H.I. Yeah, I can see it. Kind of. I didn't bring it. I should have brought it in. No, that's interesting though. I mean, you could just add it to your little pill jar. Yeah, now put it in your.

My little pill organizer I have. You know what I saw over the weekend? I saw they're selling creatine to women now. We're about to hit the creatine era. Yeah. Or we're already in it. Yeah. Spamming creatine.

No, but I've seen it now. Instead of it being in a supplement container, which just looks very like, argh. It's now in, it looks like it comes from Bath and Body Works, but it's just creatine monohydrate. Oh, really? Yeah. And I promise you, I swear to God,

I've been telling female members of my family for four or five months, I'm like, you should really give this a look. Now they'll try it. You heard about this? Things are in better packaging once women start using it. Oh, without a doubt. The best example of this is oil.

Are you aware of how oil used to, you have to get a can of oil? A can of oil, and then you had this opener, which was a metal thing with like a knife on the bottom of it, and you'd slam it in the can. And then that's how you'd pour out the oil. And then it was never like fully locked in, so you get oil all over your hand

and all over everything too. Because you were a man and it didn't matter. Right, but then women started, you know, they got all liberated, I want a job. And then they started, I mean, I could change my own oil. They opened up that garage by Jake's house. And then they started putting it in plastic bottles. Real nice, you could open it and just pour it out

and you never get a mess. Women, helping stuff. Moving society along. Yeah. I had a couple quick notes from the weekend. I had my first two youth sport event weekend. I had Saturday and Sunday. We had a makeup game.

Soccer, right? I love it, dude. It's not bad. I absolutely love it. I got scolded a little bit. Again? No. My daughter has a unique set of challenges.

And even among like my entire family, extended family, her teachers, I know every dad or whatever parent thinks this, we communicate best with each other, me and her. I can get her to do things that other people can't, right? So, the last game we had, I just kinda went over on the sideline and I wasn't really coaching the team,

but I was definitely coaching her. Cause she's not gonna do it. If the coach says, do you want to come out? She will say yes. If she's on the bench and the coach says, do you want to come in? She will say no. I'm like, that's not what we're doing.

You tell her and she'll go. But you know what I mean? It's just easier for me. So we got a notice that I couldn't be over there and that felt cucky. What? A notice? Yeah, yeah, because it was from day one.

You know, I was over there. Some of the teams have like three, four coaches. Actually, every team. And ours is just the lady usually. And so I just jumped over there and we got a group chat thing of like, kind of got to take this course and get registered. And it was just embarrassing

because the games were back to back. So one day I'm over there like, come on, and the next day I'm just sitting with my arms crossed. It was super embarrassing. So it's just the lady coach? Well, I think actually maybe her husband. Like why didn't you ask him? I didn't know.

Oh, okay. This just all kinda came up. I'm gonna do it, but you know, I kinda- Well I think actually maybe her husband. Like why didn't you ask him? I didn't know. Oh okay. This just all kinda came up. I'm gonna do it but you know I kinda. I wanna help you guys as an assistant. I helped out in pregame and anyways it was fun. So after the Saturday game we went to a winery with five or six other couples.

These are Norris school friend couples. These are not my friends that you know, high school friends, all that. So we go to this winery, it's nice, chill, whatever. I'm watching the Masters on my phone. The one guy there is not drinking, obviously. And so there's like 10 to 12 kids with us. Four to nine, maybe 10 years old.

And we're not really paying attention. four to nine, maybe 10 years old. And we're not really paying attention. These people are getting loaded, whatever. And I look around and it occurs to me, like all these kids have these little flags in their hands. Right, like little flags that look like something you'd put down for like gas work or like lawn work and they're running around with them. And I see them all running over to one location

where there are like 30 of these flags and they're piling them up and now there's 40 of these flags and they're running back over to this other part of this field at this winery and they grab the last couple and bring them over. And now there's like 50, 60 of these flags over here and they're all laughing, going crazy and they're like, all of a sudden the adults are like,

what's going on, where'd you get those? Like, oh, they were just all over here. And I'm like, that's definitely not good. So they were like, marking gas lines or something? And now we are, all, we know what's coming, so we're looking around. It's owned by by an old family. Here comes the matriarch.

So she's walking over, she's probably 80. She's like, actually first it was a dude. A dude was like, yeah, those flags were there for a reason. Spectrum was actually here all day on Friday. Marking out, you know, whatever. And dude, they're crazy. like, so now I'm with, you know, some of these people are older than me, like parents that are, you know, we're older parents,

they're like in their mid-40s. The getting transformed back into fucking getting in trouble was like we're all looking down, like, all right, I'm sorry, I won't do it again. And the guy was just like, it just doesn't, you know, you could just control him a little bit. And now he's doing that thing, the same thing that your teacher or parents did

where you've already got the message, you apologize, you know it's not gonna happen anymore. Now we're in overtime. And now he's like, you know, there's people here trying to enjoy themselves. We're like, yeah! Okay. Like, get it, bro.

Right. Okay, and he's, and you know. OK. And he's an end. You know how the one time you got an email that said, I'll go to the mat over this? And that always stuck in my head? The phrase that paid was he had said his piece. We were like, OK, OK. One guy was even like, hey, we can't put the flags back.

We don't know where they were, but nothing else will happen. So it's's kinda done. He was kinda bowing up a little bit. One of your guys. Yeah, and the guy was like, all right, let's just reel it in. I was like, reel it in? That flag in my neighborhood, or at least by my family,

is given the same respect as an orange cone. Just ditch it if it's in your way for any reason. No, I'm saying other people. Oh, okay, I thought you meant the way you as an orange cone. Just ditch it if it's in your way for any reason. No, I'm saying other people. Oh, okay, I thought you meant the way you respect an orange cone. Don't pull it, don't get near it, don't even look at it. Right, it's there. Word is bond. Legal tender.

That is put in by construction worker, like all of a sudden, it's, we can't go anywhere near that. It'll be there for a year and a half. The orange cone is a crazy trust thing, because you could just go move it and just change traffic. You could just be in control of that. It'll be there for a year and a half. The orange cone is a crazy trust thing because you could just go move it and just change traffic. You could just be in control of that. This guy. You can, huh?

No, I used to own one. You can buy one at Home Depot for $15. And then you're in a crowded area. I started this at like ticket stock and stuff. I want to leave after we did the noon show. Then we got to come back. But I'd have a choice spot because I got there so early or yeah or summer bash or whatever I just pull the orange cone out of my back put it there and somehow it is again it's people will not move it. The excitement you had in San Antonio when you found out

we had an orange cone blocking in the van Was this is magic level it was just like kid on Christmas It's incredible And I'm not feeling like a vest like one of those neon vests can get you a lot of you know Influence out in public settings to you know what I feel like I've seen people do that Maybe I'm just thinking of scammers. I've seen people do that with parking, like at an event. You have one of those. Just holding it off for their friends to just go through. And they just get in the car.

I think I've seen people do that before. That's a good idea. Yeah, so I got scolded. What does a regular weekend for you look like, Vinny? What does this weekend? This weekend, I got some shows in a backdoor comedy club. Last weekend, we're doing Weekend Check. I just want to know about your life.

I think I went to A&M baseball game. Yeah, Aggie baseball game. Where was it? That's weird. At Bluebell Park, Olsen Field, College Station. You were in College Station? Yeah, I was in Aggie, I went to A&M. And I like this great time for baseball season.

The weather's perfect perfect and they won. I've always had a desire to get into college baseball. That's also weird. When I see it every year in the College World Series, I'm like, well, this is better. The ping? Yeah, and just everybody's all teed up. Yeah, there's a chance.

Yeah, it just looks. Yeah it's like college footballs. I like college football atmosphere more than the professional atmosphere. You know I've mentioned this before like listeners of this show know this but if you ever watch videos of baseball in like Japan or Korea. Oh yeah. It's much more like college football. Yeah yeah yeah. Crazy coordination. Slovenian basketball yeah fire off a flare yeah that's cool though so is it like a I don't even is it a series over the weekend normally South Carolina yeah just pop down there for that swept him if you go down and do something like that do you try to plan a show with it

as a day game, so. No. Just in and out. Interesting. You went down just for the sole purpose of watching Aggie baseball. Oh, yeah. I got some lanes, too. I used to work at Lanes Chicken.

They have them up here now, don't they? Yeah, they're branch-ized and they're not the same. Yeah. But they had a real, I worked at the original Lanes, and it was almost like the relationship Like you guys remember good burger the movie good burger of course on dough burger That's kind of how we saw canes because canes kind of came in took the whole like formula the secret sauce idea Just made it like this big franchise thing and then set up shop like in the same parking lot in college lanes It has the original one in Walton. And we would like, I mean, there was like,

it was like a rivalry that should not have existed. We would call up Cane's and order like 1,876 chicken fingers and then never pick them up. I love that. Well, we saved you for last. Yeah, it's been so long. I got a little bit. We haven't seen you. Do you do you need like a full? Just do what we can today. We'll do the rest tomorrow top tomorrow and Thursday. No, I'll speed through this. So this was my annual ski trip. We go pretty late in the ski season because everything is cheaper. Rentals cheaper, mountain tickets cheaper, and I ticket's cheaper. And I'm not a good enough skier to understand the difference between fresh powder or whatever. You know when you fall. Yeah, it hurts, ice hurts, but whatever.

And so we were gifted a timeshare as a wedding present. Time out. He told me about this before he left. Yeah. So you know? Yeah. Okay, because I'm like, how is this the first time we're talking about this?

And he starts complaining about it, and that's this, and it's that, or whatever. And I'm like, that sounds awesome. Well. Like also, this is the exact plot to Aspen, the South Park episode, where you're gonna have a bad time Yeah, and so, you know we I'm a little outside my

Expertise here, but I guess there's a big upfront cost for a timeshare which we avoided. I think we pay 500 bucks for this thing and another hundred in maintenance fees or something So I think it's 600 bucks for the year, but I just don't like being shackled to it. I think it's awesome that you have it because again, remember my mom bought a one quarter acre plot of land in hot Springs village, Arkansas. And that thing's killing it. Uncle Gary lived across the street from it.

So she was going to build a house there or whatever. Many, many years ago, she bought this thing for like 3000 bucks. Well then, Uncle Gary died. Aunt Terri moved away. Now she owns this crappy little piece of land that they charge her $40 a month for in like Hot Springs Village fees.

Yeah. So what's that? 400, 500 bucks a year. So she couldn't keep up with it and gave it to me. And so now I pay 500 bucks a year for this crappy piece of land that you can't sell it even. That's not a good success story for Blake to lean on at all. No, I'm saying I would love to have this timeshare if I paid $500 a year.

You're already paying that for that. I got you. I have to pay the dues for the Hot Springs Village so I could give it back to them and forego these fees forever. But I just, I don't know, I don't want to yet. I don't understand this feeling of shackled. I mean, on the surface I do, but for $600 a year. You just gotta look at the perspective.

If you had my perspective, I have this thing, I pay $500 a year for a piece of wooded land that I can go look at. You can go like stay in a hotel or whatever. It seems sweet, $600 for a week, you know, we get it for seven days. Is it a cabin, like, or like a condo type thing? It's like a very 80s hotel,

where it's like everything I think is centered, like in the middle of the hotel. So in the middle, like everything faces the pool, or the ping pong tables, or the courtyard. And I think I just, it was built in the 80s and I just picture everyone with their doors open, just kind of hanging out, and, or the courtyard. And I think it was built in the 80s and I just picture everyone with their doors open just kinda hanging out, and that's the vibe. But it's just, I don't know, I just don't like

not ever being able to get out from under it. I guess. You have to go there and not somewhere else. And I know there are like timeshare portals where you can trade with people and maybe I need to explore that. But the first few years this was great, but now we've done it five, six times and I don't know.

I'll trade you my a week in hot springs. Maybe we'll have to do that. A week in hot springs, you just kind of walk the perimeter. So we get a suite, so we get a bed and a living area and so we take my parents to help watch the kid, pull out bed in there for them We get the whole room interesting. Yeah, we kind of cram in there. Well, I don't know feel like if you're bringing the The in-laws or the grandparents they may want the the prime real estate

No, cuz we're not charging them anything Just come stay for free here. I think there's a fear old man. I think there's a futon. I know you're 90 and your back is in shambles, but why don't you hop on this ottoman? I'm the alpha male. I think I could make you a palate. Why don't you just stay home, enjoy Wiley for another week then? A new patriarch in town.

Oh my God, yeah. So- She's coming with me too. One day in, I was ready to call the vacation just a complete and utter failure nowhere to go but up Because the kid is used to getting everything he wants around grandparents. He's got to do something on the plane it's just snacks for days, and I think he was just hyped and The thing that I don't understand

My parents is grandparents were not my parents as parents. Hey, 6.30 in the morning, you want a cookie? Have at it. You've already brushed your teeth and going to bed, here, a bag of chips. Yeah, no, it's wild. You wanna play this game where you shoot people on my phone? The hypocrisy go crazy. It's unreal, these are not the people that I knew.

I know. No, and even like my grandparents that were kind of the chill ones were nothing like my my parent and I know they're listening I don't care. I'll fight through the media There it's not even close and it really makes things hard and then the worst thing is they start kids you Know I don't get okay. They start telling fake stories about you or real stories, but just how bad you were fake stories about you, or real stories, but just how bad you were. You'll get this later once your kid's older.

It'll be like, oh, yeah, you know, she's doing something wrong. And it's like, oh, your dad, he, you know, he once got arrested and it doesn't matter. I caught him with acid and it doesn't, it's fine. Smoke that bowl, you know, whatever. I mean, it's real. Is this helping?

How is it helping? Yeah, what are you saying? As a kid, we didn't keep sodas in the house, didn't keep desserts and keep snacks, and now my dad literally bought a 48 pack of cookies for our five day stay. It was unreal. So let me get to the highlight of the trip.

Throw the picture up, Clayton. I checked something off of my bucket list while in Denver. I stopped by the iconic Casa Bonita. Is it open? It's open. Did you eat there? I did. Yeah, they revived it.

So it died during COVID, and the South Park riders came in, bought it for I think three and a half million, and thought, yeah, we'll just kind of keep the doors open. Well, it needed to be heavily renovated, and they spent about $40 million renovating it. So it opened back up in 2023, and it was a six month wait list,

and I don't know how we got in there, but we did. It was a Tuesday, non-spring break, I think we just kinda got lucky. But those that are unfamiliar, it has basically been called the Disneyland of Mexican food. Because there are, you sit down and you eat, there are cliff divers going on, there's a puppet show every 20 minutes,

there's a magic show every hour, there's these little NPC characters walking around doing their own show. It's amazing. But the first 30 minutes, I guess the first hour, it's $40 for kind of all you can, basically all you can eat sopapillas. But the food is well below average.

Really, of course it is. Very crappy Mexican food. And as I'm sitting in this cave, eating this food for 40 bucks, I'm like, I don't know about this. But then once we got up and walked around, having a kid there obviously helps. But like I said, there's black Bart is walking around

trying to escape the sheriff. And the sheriff is walking around asking people if you've seen him. That kind of stuff was funny to me. There were other characters that walked up to Brooks, hey, have you seen my treasure? And so that part was fun. Brooks got a balloon animal and the cliff diver,

I think I pulled a video of that, Clayton. Yeah, there's just a dude in a Speedo climbing a cliff and we'll just do dive. Just every 20 minutes. And we thought about how funny is it that that's his job. I gotta go to the restaurant and dive. Just every 20 minutes. And we thought about how funny is it that that's his job. I gotta go to the restaurant and dive tonight. You know, this is kinda like, do you ever see people on Twitter,

I don't know, the guru self help people will tweet something and then tag it with like, you can just do things. This is kinda how I feel when I see stuff like this. It's the same way as like if I watch, sometimes if I watch Asian game shows or television, and there's just like, oh, well, there's a guy playing the harp dressed as a bee on a water slide.

You know, like, I don't understand it, but they're just like, well, you can just do this shit. Who cares? Maybe we will just have a cliff diver at a Tex-Mex restaurant. Why not? The guys who see that video, though, end up jumping in the fish tank at Cabela's and stuff.

Oh, that's true. That is such a great video. Naked guy in Cabela's. He's in the dating profile app, right? Of just all these random celebrities that had their 10 minutes. I think yeah, that's gotta be, he's gotta be hooking up with Shovel Girl.

So in reading about Casa Bonita, I didn't realize this, but they had four other ones, or maybe three other ones. And one was in Fort Worth. Oh, wow. I did not know that, by the Huland Mall. I don't think it made it very long. As lavish with all the accoutrement,

as the Denver one, wow. Yeah. Dude, the 80s mall. I mean, I know you guys know better than I do, but like the two floor arcade that we had, what a day. Water features. And then there were some South Park nods,

like I think if you're there on the right day, Man Bear Pig will be walking around. Oh wow. And then of course the writers did all the voices for the announcements and what have you, but yeah there's arcade there too. But it was pretty cool. I don't know if I would ever go back,

but it was cool to see. And maybe if I was with some other people, I'd wanna go back, but. How far is it from the timeshare? About an hour and a half. So we stay in Avon, which is about an hour and a half west of Denver. Where we went and did shows from the timeshare for a week.

Yeah, we could. I'm in. Yeah. Then we hit a Rockies game because downtown stadiums are the best. Oh yeah, absolutely. I love it there. It was just a couple miles away, walked up, $7 a ticket,

and I just saw other people just walk around and then let's just see a couple innings. Name a Rocky. Just walk in there. A current Rocky. Interesting. I'm gonna get back to you. You walked up and bought a ticket. No problem.

There's no way you can. No, you could see it from the highway. The 300 level is not very packed. No, we're not doing Dante Bichette. I was gonna- Probably Dante Bichette Jr. Todd Heldman. Just start bringing up guys that you know

and then just say- No, Bo Bichette plays for the Blue Jays. No, up guys that you know and then just say, No one. Beau Bichette plays for the Blue Jays. No, I was gonna say this. I always thought the Rockies had a really cool team through Todd Helton and Tulowitsky and Cargo. Oh for sure. They always had a really cool team,

but this year it's- Gabe played there for a year. This year things are not looking good. Of course not. Chris Bryant. He's a Rocky. Oh he is? He's a current Rocky?

Yeah, Britton Doyle out in the center. Anyway. Couldn't tell ya. Downtown ballparks are the best. Only skid for a day this trip, went with a buddy of mine. We did 25 runs on the day and on my third run of the day I hit 56 miles an hour. Woo.

I chased that dragon the rest of the day but 56 was my top. What are you using? I got an app. All the fuck? Slopes. Okay. It'll track the GPS, it'll show your map for the day

and top speeds and what have you. And then the final thing is we drove over to Aspen because I hear about Aspen a lot, either through South Park or Dumb and Dumber, it was always a place I wanted to visit. Not a real place. Aspen? Yeah, to me, you get there, you're like,

this is a movie set. It's just a town. Oh, I didn't feel like it was just a town at all. Really? It's like a resort town, right? It's a resort town for sure. It just feels, it felt to me like I was on a movie set, maybe because I've seen it in movies.

Well, it is really cool how the mountain will turn into the town. You can get off the slopes and take your skis off and walk to your timeshare condo, whatever. And so the first time we went there, we took a gondola up because that's pretty iconic. We got to see the view from up there. And this was several years ago,

but we needed some brunch, breakfast, whatever, and we walked in this place called Poppycocks. It was one of the only places to get food around there. And I was wearing a cowboy shirt at the time, and the owner sits us down and he says, hey, Jerry Jones and his wife Jean sits over there all the time. I was like, oh really?

He said, yeah, he's got a house in Aspen, it's got a big blue star on it. And of course. Of course it does. He said every year for Christmas, he orders just crates of this pancake mix to send to all the team employees. Okay, I guess it's gotta be good. And then I see it on the menu, oatmeal pancakes.

It's like, you know, what we're known for. And so I got each of you a bag by your trash cans. And these pancakes are ridiculously good. We drive an hour and a half to Aspen. He hid it behind the trip. Look what's under your chair. Every year we make the hour and a half drive to Poppycocks and Aspen because Jerry Jones loves it.

And these pancakes are ridiculously good. And so I guess it's not, I mean, it's gotta have some flour, but basically the base is oatmeal, which makes them a little heartier and it goes with the syrup really, it's fantastic. That is definitely the sort of thing I would do if I had money.

Like, you're just traveling somewhere, and you're like, you know what, I like these. I want everybody. I want to have these every year. And so I saw the guy again, said, hey, guy from Dallas, we talk every year, whatever. He said, oh hey, Jerry just ordered a bunch for his employees the other day. He said he paid more in overnight shipping

than he did for the pancake mix. I bet he's done that a lot. Yeah. I want it now. Yeah. That's definitely the rich guy move you want. That's awesome, man. There's my trip to Denver.

Like you would just order bread from ThunderCloud in Austin. You could just have that sandwich every day without having to go there. The reason I ask about those Rockies tickets is do you guys, whenever you go to Cowboys game, do you buy them at the stadium or do you just buy them online?

Well, I wanted to avoid all the fees, and so I just walked up and bought a ticket. Okay, at a game? Yeah. Okay, because I went to the Arlington Supercross here in February, and like the motorcycle races, and I'm like, there's no way this is gonna sell out. You know, like, it's, you know,

not enough people like watch this sport for it to sell out. I'll be able to go up to the box office no problem. I get to the box office, ticket, buy tickets here. There's a lady, she's a ticket booth attendant, she's got a sign behind her that says buy tickets here. I go up to her, I was like, I'd like two tickets for tonight's event please. She was like, you can't buy tickets here.

And I was like, what do you mean you can't buy tickets? She was like. Because you're Mexican? She just pointed at the sign. She was like, yeah, we, ever since COVID, we, we don't do, you can't buy tickets at the window now. And I was like, what? You can't buy tickets at the location where the thing is.

Yeah, there's a, I mean, there's a sign over here that says buy tickets. She's at the ticket booth location. And I'm the same way, because I don't want to... That's like $50 in convenience fees. She's like, do you have the StubHub app? And I'm like, I don't want to do that, because then I have to pay these... I'm in front of you right now,

asking you to buy a ticket for the event at the ticket booth. And she's giving me this line about COVID. And even if that was true, you're in the perfect profession for COVID, like a job. Like there's this big plexiglass in between us. So to hear that you can actually just go up is- No, we bought five tickets for 35 bucks. Yeah, so then I ended up having to pay

in what becomes an inconvenience fee like right in front of her. And I'm just bitching and moaning the whole time and just like. Why is that lady even there? Yeah. Just to tell you can't buy tickets, yeah. Not her first time.

Dan, you aware that there are just full stadiums of people watching motocross? What stadium was this? Well, AT&T. AT&T.T Oh I thought you were like a tiny little place or something no no they do monster trucks too don't they like the same week they use the same dirt I've been to the monster truck crowds usually next weekend monster boy yeah um qualis roofing and construction will sponsor sports for us today because we're going to get into that. Have they replaced your roof yet? Because it's storm season.

Working on it. We're scheduling my roof right now. Okay. Got the deductible all figured out. I know what that means now. How big of a beating was that? Luckily not a beating at all. So a boo yay yes if your if your roof does get pelted with a hail or whatever that's a boo that's terrible but yay qualysgc.com, Qualys Roofing is there to help you and they're going to like they did this for me what was it about a year ago actually, I replaced my roof. All we paid was deductible. They dealt with the insurance company, like the calls back and forth, the email, like I didn't even do anything. Nothing. The appointment with the adjuster. They

took it all out of my hands. The only thing I did, we had to pick like the color of the shingle. I'm like, I don't know, make it roof color. I don't care. New roof, make a new roof. Yes, and if you get a free roof inspection, they'll give you a free roof inspection and a dumb zone t-shirt for free when you hit them up. QualisGC.com. Any listener that gets a roof, they'll pay $6.90,

for a $6.90 for you. So it's QualisGC.com. Qualis, making roofing sexy again. Really, is that what they say? From the wonderful world of sports, radio sports, scoreboard. Oh yeah, I like that. What a weekend. So, was listening

or watching 18, Rory on 18, the first time yesterday. And Jim Nance is talking and my wife is like, this guy sucks. So, and then you made love. Here is Jim Nance. The story's been written a million times. The questions have been asked repeatedly. God, dude. If, can you do it?

How badly do you want it? All of those moments lead to this. Then he misses. So a little false start by Nance. He was... Why is he talking like that though? He's a lifetime narrator. Yeah, sounds like my internal monologue when I'm trying to have sex with my wife. I'm gonna be a warning.

It's golf. Now, what he should say... Going to a playoff. What he should say is, I guess he didn't really... Guess this isn't that important to him. I guess he's... follow up. And especially after he hit that the shot into the sand right there. Choke! That is a choke of epic proportions. You were up one. All you had to do

is par that hole. So of course the incredible momentum that Justin Rose had as he finished really strong and Rory did not, that means Justin Rose would walk away with the green jacket. No, no. Oh wait, the momentum didn't matter because I'll tell you what, that's what they would have said had he won it. Anyway.

How bad do you want it? Here, let me give you a little more Nance. I just think, Nance, when I watch football, I'm like, this guy is not a football announcer, he's a golf announcer. Let him do that. And then when I watch golf, I hate him. So I don't know what I want.

I just think I just need no Nance. I would rather have Tony Romo in the booth with Nance at a golf match, cause that would at least make a good. Oh yeah, some antidote to Nance. Do you ever meet someone and you're like, boy I really respect that person and I like them and they're funny, I like everything about them. That's just kind of the person, they embody

what I think a complete person would be. That's the opposite for Nance. I hate everything about him. I hate his voice, I hate his look, I hate that he represents golf and particularly Augusta. I hate that he's like, I'm going to retire in 2038, the most self-important shit ever. I hate that he had a- He just recently announced that, right? Yeah.

Like literally a decade from now. I hate that he had a painting of himself that his wife wouldn't let him hang. Dude, when I was a kid- I hate everything about him. When I was a kid, they fired- He probably uses- well, whatever. Brent Musburger, out of nowhere, was fired from CBS. And it was just, it was, as I recall,

this was just a shocking, shocking media story. Cause you know, each place has their lead announcer type guy, and that was Brent Musburger. He handled everything. And all of a sudden he's just gone. And it was shocking. And I kind of think Jim Nance saying, I'm going to retire in 2038 or whatever he said,

is kind of saying, look, now you can't fire me for that long. No matter what I asked for and what I, like if I announce, I'm legendary Jim Nance. I would love them to fire him. So mean, but yeah. I want that right after, okay, I want Luca back on the map. Then I want them to fire him.

Then I want my kids to stay healthy and be successful. But in that order. Fair. Okay, so now it's golf. With the Popeyes five dollar big box back but. And if you're if you're used to watching guys punch each other in the mouth and just a huge strategic like they're going to try and now tell you how exciting this golf is. It's such a heyday. I love it.

Here the unexpected unfolding on a Sunday But you said earlier use the term head spinning I've never seen anything quite his head spinning is what this final round has produced We used the term earlier roller coaster See the seatbelt buckled for this one So many twists and turns they say it's the all-time Pauling Town ok now this doesn't make any sense this doesn't make any sense to drop this

ok except for it's self-serving so many twists and turns they say it's the all-time Pauling Town in the state of Georgia history is right here in Augusta this weekend all-time a lot of people myself included The test of that but there's even thicker air

So he's trying to oh It's horrible tie in that I've got you can hear my voice is a little right because the pollen I'm just like the golfers fighting through it, except they're fighting through the pressure. That's fantastic. From start to finish, the Wateralli Coast, I've never been more excited than my life. Look, I think it's cool that Rory won. Yeah, it was cool.

I think it's cool. Also self-serving, Tiger tweeting congratulations, only that Tiger was the only guy who had all four majors. Like Rory now the only golfer playing who has all four majors, is that right? So do we have a list? He's got the career grand slam now. Yes, yes.

Will you add reasons why it was okay for Tiger or LeBron to make it about themselves? What do you mean? We have a list for you of any time LeBron and Tiger make it about themselves okay for no reason yeah no Tiger kind of made this about himself because he is tweeting this out you're thinking oh wait the only other oh yeah that's right it's there oh also he didn't say this but I read between the lines I had them all at one time like I won them all in a row not the same calendar year but there at one time. Like I won them all in a row.

Not the same calendar year, but there was one time at golf when you said, who is the defending champion of this major? Like every major, it was Tiger. Rory, that's cool that you did it like eight years apart, little buddy, that's pretty sweet. Anyway. So exciting.

I do think it's cool that Rory won. I don't think this is a good story at all that you're about to hear, because now we're gonna get you geared up. It's Justin Rose, it's Rory. Let's give you a couple of things that will bring you in. Now I have brought my wife in,

she's now watching the end of this with me. Like so let's in let's just reset for everybody why this is so cool okay so uh we can just teach everybody about golf and why this is great. I was telling you the story about the modest terms that Rory and his family grew up with in Northern Ireland One of Rory's closest friends over here in the States is Jimmy Dunn who's an Augusta member Rory once told him the story about how Took his son this young gifted talent

To the range he had all he had left for the week was one token enough money for one token He put it in the ball box Rory told his daddy that I wanted to hit more He said son, that's all I've got till next Tuesday Just go hit every shot. It's only like 30 balls. Just go hit every shot like the Masters depends on it Disappointed the little Rory said okay dad. I'm gonna do it. Let's go but the masters depends on it's the latest is the latest thing ever so let's try to make justin rose interesting justin rose So let's try to make Justin Rose interesting. Not just at Marion, but at Muirfield Village. We went to Pebble Beach a few years back.

It goes on and on. Got it major, got his Olympic gold. You saw him look up to the sky after making that putt on 18. That's a nod to his late father, Ken. Yes. Oh my God. Yes, yes, he's dead. My God.

You know what? So now I'm thinking, God, yes, he's dead. My God. You know what? So now I'm thinking, God, this, he's playing with that heaviness. Yeah. Like, oh my gosh, his dad. Probably died Wednesday, didn't he? Yeah, yeah. Nod to his late father, Ken.

Yes. Dad passed away, really the young age of 57, back in 2002. That's like the, that like the medium amount of time. It's both not when you were young and not last week. 23 years ago. That's the least sad amount of time to be experiencing. And how old is Mr. Rosen?

He must have been. Yeah, he was definitely like in his 20s by then. He's not grappling with it still. He's not. Now here's the final call. Okay by the way so yeah now it's later in the day and so it is kind of cool looking. I mean everything looks cool. The Masters looks incredible. It's the White Lotus of golf tournaments. Yeah but now here's the ball but then there's a

really long shadow of the ball. It is cool looking, but Nance sees that. I don't think he wrote this last night, because I think sometimes he writes his final statement the night before. But on this one, he sees that, and and then you're gonna hear his brain working and he's gonna come up with something with the shadow. Will the shadows be in his way? No. The only problem is the nerves.

Yeah. Look at the long shadows. Symbolic this moment. The journey it's taken to get here. Is it? For all this history. Don't make me root for him to miss this shot, but he made it. The long journey is over. McElroy has his masterpiece. He wrote that last night. Sure. Masterpiece, because he had all the other majors, but not the masters.

That's very good. It's very good. I mean, he's just too much, but I love it. He thinks all of life is like a play, and he's the playwright. By the way, that's something I wanted to talk to you about. I was listening to our friend, we introduced him as comedian Vinnie Corrales,

but did you write children's plays? Oh yeah, yeah. When I first moved up here, I was a musician. And so you just like wait around a lot during the day and you're just doing stuff at night. So I would call different preschools and have them like bring like music classes to their preschool.

So I was bouncing around from like Montessori schools. And- This is as a business. Yeah, yeah, just like some independent contractor stuff basically, you know? And yeah, I wrote this one. It was called Pink Freud or What Dreams May Come and it took place in a dream

and we did like Inner Sandman, we did like, I think we did like a Weezer song, we did, but it was like a 45 minute, but it was very ambitious and, but it was fun, yeah. And you made money from this? Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure, yeah. This was like probably 10 years ago. So we were just.

Like I heard him say, like talking like, you know, you're doing comedy, what else you got? You're doing music, what else you got going on? And he's like, well, I sold the children's play and that got me through for a while. Yeah. Yeah, I haven't thought about those in a while. Anyways.

So that's what I got in sports. Oh, I didn't, I what my Luca thought of the weekend. Oh yeah. Was this morning I heard someone else talking about Luca. I mean it's incredible that it can still like, I feel like it's dominating sports media still. Like that's how big of a miscue this was. Yeah, I mean I try to spend a day or so not thinking about it if possible. Yeah, I try to.

Like making sure that my podcast listing that day doesn't involve the NBA or whatever. I try, I gotta get a day. But you know what? It's not gonna matter here in about a week, because he's gonna be playing like every other night or every third night. It's gonna be awesome. And we're gonna be watching him and Ant again,

just like we were gonna get to watch for years to come here. Sucks. Okay, I missed this just watching up in Denver. The worst part was Cuban, right, after the game? Oh, seeing him hug up? Yeah, acting like nothing happened, and he's wearing an Anthony Davis shirt. Yeah, it was really weird.

So did you see the video? We played it of Cuban during Fire and EcoChance. Yeah, that post-train is so old. I'm so, he sucks. Yeah, no. He started this whole thing. You're right, he's... Anyway, go ahead. No, I. He started this whole thing. You're right, he's... Anyway, go ahead.

No, I mean, I don't know. I mean, he got the quick tap up afterward. Jason Kidd's gone from the floor, so he didn't. But, yeah, I don't know. I'm excited to watch the Lakers play. I guess I'll put it to you like that. Well, Jason Kidd ran right off the floor. Yeah, right away.

Because Jason Kidd was a big part of this effing trade. Yeah. If Jason Kidd said, absolutely not, that's probably the guy that Nico leaned on here. Cause I'm not really in the game, you are. You were with him in LA. There is no way that this gets done if Jason Kidd says says don't do it.

Completely agree. But Jason Kidd's like, yeah, I don't know. Like, it's one thing to convince Patrick Dumont. He doesn't know what he's doing. Yeah, but Jason Kidd's also an egomaniac who likes power. Oh, yeah. And likes defense. And so it's not a hard sell to him.

Hell, this might have been Jason Kidd telling Niko to go explore this. And you know who I could win with? Anthony Davis. Yeah. I'll tell you another thing. I'm tired of this. Oh, you know what?

It's not Anthony Davis' fault. And he's a top 75. First of all, I don't know that he's a top 75 player. We got in a big fight about this last week. He keeps saying, that's what everybody keeps saying. I don't know where it came from top 75 player. We got in a big fight about this last week. He keeps saying, that's what everybody keeps saying. I don't know where it came from. I guess it was on some lists, the NBA.com put on. I keep getting mentioned. Yeah, for the 75th year of the NBA, the top 75 players.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So he barely made it and Kyrie didn't remember. And no Detroit Pistons from that 0-4, 0-5 team made it. No, it's stupid. It's like the NFL players voting on the NFL top 100 every year. But now they're using this as if this is gospel number one. Yeah, no, it'll be like, ah, Luca had 32, 13, and 9, and Anthony Davis was once considered a top 75 player.

Right. It's like. There's two stat lines. Yeah, the thing is, I don't care. I don't care that, oh, well, he didn't, I don't care. He sucks. I don't want him. I would never trade him for Luca. Nobody would. He is not loyal. He is not, he didn't cry when he sees it. Like he demanded it. He worked his way out of New Orleans. He's, you know, they weren't a favorite this year. The Lakers weren't. But now that you add Luca,

people are like, I don't know, man. I mean, their betting odds went up. So I was thinking about this in the terms of when back in the day, it was like a, would you trade Dirk for Shaq? And at the time, I wanted to. I wanted to do it. And when I'm thinking about that scenario, Shaq was still in his prime but at the end of his prime. But he still had at least a couple of good years left. Was this Lakers Shaq you're talking about? Lakers Shaq. And pre-Ring Dirk. Where he is... Is this like pre-06 finals Dirkirk? No. Oh yeah, oh yeah. Okay. Absolutely.

Where there was talk of, would you trade Shaq for Dirk? I don't know that it was actual talk between the Mavs and Lakers, but it was certainly talk on our radio show. And the debate was, would Dirk ever be good enough? Would he ever be able to win the big one? This guy clearly is, and he's one of the top three players in the NBA right now. So, do you want the 30-something, maybe he was just 30 or just 32 or 33, I can't remember,

or this young guy who like, I don't even know what his game is and he's really, really good. I think he could win one one day, but this is Shaq. So that was the argument. But the argument was for the currently one of the best players in the NBA, one of the top three players in the NBA, older guy versus the young guy who hasn't proven it yet. And like it's the only comp is that you had the young guy to trade. Yeah. But you weren't trading him for a currently better player. It doesn't make any sense to try to make sense of it.

I'm also like kind of curious as to how no other owners kind of protested, because it seems like you should be able to, if you want to trade a player, every other team should have an opportunity to put together a deal. That's kind of how it is in waivers, right? Where if you cut a guy, it has to go through the order, but yeah, I don't know.

Well, that's what the trading team usually does, because they want to maximize their return. Right, it kind of takes care of itself. Like, the market bears itself by soliciting offers. And yeah. I just don't, I'm kind of, I'm not saying I'm tired of being tired of it. I'm still sad about it.

I'm just tired of trying to make sense of it. It's going to hurtful. Because it's just like, it is what, not it is what it is. I'm not over it. If Luka were here tomorrow night, and there was another Mavericks game, I would go buy a ticket again and I would scream at Cuban just like I did last week.

But thinking about it and trying to make sense of it, it's just that this guy sucks at his job and he's an asshole. And he found himself in a perfect situation with a power vacuum and he exploited it. Do we all blame Cuban here? I'm not sold on the blame in Cuban thing. Because he was told that he was going to be still in charge of team operations and stuff,

and then they kind of, Miriam Adelson kind of like, you know, got him out of the deal or whatever. I would prefer that he had gotten that a little more ironclad, but I'm just tired, man. I kind of think I'm not that mad at Cuban only because- I'm just tired man. I kind of think. We're not. I'm not that mad at Cuban only because. I'm not either. If like there's no way they would do this. That's no, this wasn't in the card.

No other team. The black swan. Yeah like and I still go back to I can't believe like I would love to see that meeting where Nico is first like floating the idea to Rob Palenka and Rob Palenka is like don't say anything. It's your wife. Your wife's going out of town and you're dropping off at the airport. Oh yeah this morning my wife said I got book club after this after work today like as she's leaving

the house and I'm like I was really planning on us getting to spend a little time together. Don't say anything. don't react at all most important thing is you take care of you I'll be fine don't react at all and then the guy also worked it to the worry yeah he didn't give up Boston Reaves he didn't like well if you won't let me talk to him I got to keep that other first you want me to call you you want me to call you tall you calling him? Okay, buddy. Effing, god damn it. I know, I know. Do you have any other sports you wanna get to news?

Well, you were talking to Masters a minute ago and I just had a couple quick notes. I saw four or five people in the wild wearing Masters gear this weekend and I'm just wondering what are we? So you're watching it. It's just like. I'm gonna put on my Masters shirt. Masters gear this weekend, and I'm just wondering, what are we? So you're watching it, so I'm gonna put on my Masters shirt. At the soccer fields, at the winery,

and at a gas station, and one of them was a lady. She just had a Masters polo on. You ever throw your cowboy jersey on just to watch the cowboy game? Yeah, but it's weird because it is a team, and golf doesn't really so much have that option where you'd wear your Bryson t-shirt, but it did feel like being at the grocery store on a Sunday

and just having your Super Bowl shirt. And a current one, you know? I just love the big game. I don't know, I know that the merch is super exclusive and they make X amount of crazy money and you have to buy it there and it's cool stuff. It's just, so you gotta wear it, right? You're kind of in a when do I wear this $200 polo spot

and it turns out it's just to Academy, the day of moving day. One day a year. Boy, I thought about our hypothetical a lot of if you just put a ball on the green, could you break 70 at a major or something? And with the way those greens were playing, I don't think I could have.

So you start like on the edge of the green? Sure, just give me a putt. Give me the hardest putt on every hole. Can you make it in 70 strokes? I don't know, man. That'd be great. You're gonna have to nibble hard. Some of those greens were ridiculous.

That's a really funny idea. The ultimate pup-pup. I heard the, yeah, because I heard the musers talking this morning, like could EA go under 500? Because I was thinking, it might be like 500 to 1,000, right, like with penalty strokes and the like. I think it would take two days for me to finish the course.

Depending on where the drops were. Do you think about, what if they told me to go drive, like think of 18, it's this very skinny fairway, and the fans are just lining there. And Rory is just gonna hit, like everybody knows he's going to hit it down the middle there. Yeah, full public trust.

Just everyone's like, yeah, of course, I'll stand here. But that would be a bet payoff is stand in the gallery when Jake is going to tee off. The problem is, you know, it's like somebody was talking to me this weekend about injuries from playing sports growing up. I'm like, well, I played my whole life, still do, but I never really had that many injuries because I wasn't moving that fast. And I feel like you'd be actually safer, maybe, than with Blake.

Right, you don't want to be to the right of me. Who's got serious power. Take your head off power. But I'm like, yeah, dribbling. It is funny, amateurs, when you're playing and you forget that your buddy has a ball back there and you're at your ball, and when they get ready to hit, you get the hell out of there.

Because you don't know where that thing is going. But you have to just stand there 10 feet from a tee shot. Yeah. That doesn't compute. My only other sports note from the weekend, and I don't know if we have time, is we had our first full-blown NIL holdout. Yeah.

Tennessee's quarterback, I don't even know how to pronounce his last name. Oh yeah, I saw that. There's Nico. I just know that it, when written out, looks like I am a Leva, which is funny, but their blue chip quarterback, and now there are reports that he was actually negotiating

during the playoff. So what does that mean, hold out? He's not coming to spring practice. I think he was supposed to get like two million, and then he saw what the Carson Beck quarterback got when he went to Miami. Yeah, he sucks. Got like four million.

Yeah. And he was basically like, all right, I'm not gonna play until I get his number. It's the same thing as we've, it's the same. Or he'll go elsewhere. Yeah, and I mean, I think as of now, Hypal's saying, their coach is saying, that's it. No, yeah, he's gone.

His dad was super involved, I think. Most are. Was the Dan Lanning thing validated? I don't know, I saw some memes. Do you wanna tell us what? Well, basically, Nico was out shopping himself trying to get more money, and I guess hit up Oregon to see what their offer was, and Dan Lanning heard

about this and called Josh Hypple, the head coach of Tennessee, and said, hey, your quarterback is shopping himself around, and that's how Hypple found out, and then told Nico, you're gone. You're not gonna negotiate behind our back. Okay, I guess he was asked about it, Lanning was, and he didn't comment on it, which means he did.

Well that's pretty cool. That's good. That's cool. Yeah, your team must not think that you're gonna be able to make it in the NFL if you're dead set on trying to get this extra two million right now, you know? Yeah, that's a good point too, yeah. Yeah, I don't know, I mean, talent's talent. They were going, you know, Quinn, yours.

Talent's talent, but there is something to, and look, we're gonna make this comparison about Arch, just like we are for Tom Brady, and people are gonna say, well, he was able to do that because of his family. And that's somewhat true. But there is something to the Arch Manning thing of like, hey, I'm gonna play here,

because this is going to get me ready for the NFL. Yeah. I could, he could be making double whatever he's making if he wants to go. For sure. But I mean the whole Quinn thing was like, oh my gosh, he's gonna leave his high school team, this guy doesn't have the fire to play

and people were falling all over themselves to get him. Then he left Ohio State and it's like oh this guy oh Yeah, but but to Vinny's point I think that's different because I think Quinn Ewers was saying I have nothing left to learn or prove in high school No one in college. I mean in college you should be thinking About the NFL if you're a quarterback, I would say and you're just like trying to make a lick But you may need the money. But there was a lot of, you know, criticism of Quinn Hewers for doing that.

For sure. And now maybe it's more of a, oh yeah, of course he did that. Well, it didn't, you know, I mean, he did that, he went to Ohio State, he bailed from there for a year, but anyways, I think this is probably going to become somewhat commonplace until they figure all this shit out. Because it's out of control.

Well, they keep trying to not have responsibility for paying them themselves. Right. It's out of control, but it's also like, it's still the same thing. Because people, somebody made the point to me, they were like, well, if you pay the players, then only the Alabamas and Georgias

are gonna get the best players. And it's just like, well, that's how it is now. Yeah, I don't worry about the rich getting richer or whatever, but I do think kids just being able, I mean, right now you can commit, get paid, and then just bail. You know, and a lot of these dudes are getting taken advantage of too.

Yeah, but some of them. It's just the Wild West market. Some people benefit without you even thinking that would have been a consequence of NIL, like the manager of the college basketball team. That's true. That's NIL deal. A hundred grand for putting like a Wingstop sticker on his boom box. That guy ruled. What do you got for me, Dan?

I was just going to tell you about making money, because I know a lot about that. Well, making somebody else working to make you money, and that is how ownwell.com slash the dumb zone can kick you in. It is property tax season. Ownwell.com slash the dumb zone. Deadline May 15th. So what Ownwell does is they help you appeal your property taxes. I say help you, they just do it for you. Well when I say making you money because you're busy so they do it

for you, they do the work and then they make you money. And if they don't, they don't charge you anything. Right? So if they save you a thousand dollars, they'll take a small percentage of that, less than anybody else on the market, but you have now made money. Which is a taste. That you would not have made. And this year. They take their piece. This year and going forward,

cause I joined the Ownwell family a few years ago. And I actually. Ownwell Nation? Ownwell Nation. And I just got this email last week. 2025 property tax season is approaching. Open up the email. Hi Blake. There's no need to file anything this year.

Done and dusted, auto. So they checked it. Yeah. They did it without you doing it. So that five minutes you spent was years ago. Yep. Think of how that five minutes has appreciated. Over time.

Come join OwnWell Nation. At OwnWell.com slash The Dumb Zone. Save money on your property taxes with OwnWell, Dan. Alright. Here's Jake with the Dumb Zone News. Alright, I read an insane, is that? Here's Jake with the Dumb Zone News. We're all having fun.

This weekend, Halo Godguy. What's up? What's going on this weekend? Oh, Halo Major in Arlington. A major. Aren't you stoked? The fifth? No, the first. Is there anyone with a long shadow hanging over them?

Of course. It'll be Frosty's masterpiece. You a gamer? Me, no, no, no. I started playing the Harry Potter game around Christmas time though. Look what he's done with that Rubik's Cube throughout the show.

I know, it's. He's just like. That's like an advanced model. They say there's as many permutations for this as there are atoms in the known universe. Wow, you're like God. So all glory to my mom really for refusing to vaccinate me. Did you, we've asked before, was it just the getting autism thing that turned into the Rubik's cube or do you come from like a long line of cubers?

No, I started cubing very late in life. Okay. So I was like 25. All right. When I picked you up. You look down upon in the cubing community, you don't have the pedigree? Probably, yeah, probably.

It saved his life once. That it did. So I did one of the few, I did some adulting this weekend, Dan. And one of the things that makes me feel like an adult is when I read a long New York Times article in the morning on the weekend. Little coffee.

Little coffee. I read an article about this guy in Connecticut, Waterbury, Connecticut, and he's 32 years old, and earlier this year, he was found when the home that he was in was set ablaze. It's like a small middle-class town. Firefighters and police respond, and they find this guy outside.

He's 32 years old, and he's described as looking like a Holocaust survivor. He was 5'9", 68 pounds. Turns out that this guy, 32 years old, has been in an attic for I think 20 years since he was 12 years old and completely cut off from society. Lived there with his stepmom. His dad had passed away. He had two sisters who were about the same age and the neighborhood and the city knew about them. Older people in the city knew about the boy but it had been 20 years since anyone had seen him so all of their neighbors that had moved in in the last 20 years like we didn't even know they had a son.

So yeah, he had not been let out of the house since he was 12. Was he messed up? Like is he mentally, like is he like Bart Simpson's evil twin brother? No, he was doing great. No, no, not, but I mean why did they put him in there? Was he?

Yeah, yeah, like when they put him in the attic, right? Yeah, he's like, he's the little ogre son, and let's they put him in there was he yeah, yeah, like when they put him in the attic, right? Yeah, he's like, yeah, that's right. Oh, your son and let's just put it It there's no it doesn't say like I'm sure now he's messed up, but it doesn't say The stepmother is we could never have put 12 year old Jake up there and he stays No, right. I think that would have been tough. I think that would have been tough. You just got out so No. Right? I think that would have been tough. I think that would have been tough. You just got out. So the stepmom, 57 years old, been charged with kidnapping, assault, cruelty. I feel like that's implied.

Unlawful restraint and reckless endangerment. Not nice. No. She's charged with not nice. This is not nice. Meanie. Misdemeanor Meanie. Big Meanie. Misdemeanor Meanie. Big Meanie.

The biological mother had given up her parental rights. The dad passed away. Sisters. But he only died like in the last year, so I think he was on board. The house fire, by the way, was set by the guy, the kid. Okay, he figured a way out. Yeah.

Yeah, now he, there's even, you know, he used to go- How'd he do it? Like did he have a mat? I think it was- Here, don't play with these. These are matches. No, I think he got a hold of, how do they say, incendiary devices?

The magnifying glass, the glasses, with the sunlight coming in, you could then burn this leaf. Well, however he did it, he got out. When's the last time you did that? Well, magnifying glass? You've done that, right? Yeah, but that's not one I've fired back up retro style. Maybe after like, honey, I shrunk the kids or something.

Man, I hated that movie because it terrified me, but I think my kid would love it. My kids do love it. We were talking about it the other day, and she's like, oh, I've heard something about it. I'm like, I think, I was terrified by that movie, dude. Too realistic? Too real?

No? That ant looked real. Yeah, Rick Moranis. He wore a lot of helmets in movies. But I think about it in Ghostbusters. Ghostbusters, yeah, ill-fitting helmet. Yeah. Yeah, he's kind of like...

Space balls. Space balls, yeah, that was another big helmet. Dark helmet. Who's a big helmet guy? Whose helmet doesn't fit him? My homes. Sam Bradford Whose helmet doesn't fit him? My home's. Sam Bradford's helmet doesn't fit him on the other way. Yeah.

Yeah. So anyways, yeah, this guy's, he's in, you know, care, of course. He basically taught himself, he taught himself how to read. They said that he had a, occasionally could pick up radio signals and he had like Connecticut basketball and NASCAR. That's funny though when they write, he taught himself how to read.

Then you just walk away and you nod and go, okay. But then have him read something. Well, yeah, I'm sure he's got his own take. I'm sure he goes freestyle a little bit. Let's see what level and what are we talking about here? There were books. So he said the man read and reread a handful of books Looking up where he had a dictionary and the police affidavit says ultimately he educated himself But and then the affidavit continued but also it's funny to watch him try to read. Yeah, that's good

Wait, but he wasn't like born in there didn't he went in when he was like 12 12 Yeah, he knew some stuff. Yeah, and I think they said that maybe through elementary. He was in a school But you know you think about fifth grade reading sixth grade reading Without at least the books in the dictionary up there, you would forget how to read. Yeah, I guess. I think so. Attribute or something. Yeah, I think so.

Without a pen or, no pen, no pencil, no paper, no writing utensil, no book, you go sit up there, I think no words, no letters, you would forget how to read in five years. But you're saying he had a collection of books. Yeah, limited. They said he had a few and a dictionary. I'd like to know what they were.

Start a book club? Wouldn't you like to know? Sure. Well, the thing is, it's not going to be anything profound. It's going to be like. It's not like Anne Frank story. No. That's his story. That's what be like. It's not like Anne Frank story? No.

That's his story. That's what I'm saying. What do you think, this is how people do. It'll be like Reggie Roby's biography, you know what I mean? And like just some spare boys book, you know? Not the outsiders, what's the boys book series I'm thinking of?

The Hardy Boys. Oh my God, it's the boys book series I'm thinking of? The hearty boys. It's me, Margaret. What does he know about making love? How about self love? I think you could figure that out on your own. Oh, 100%. You think so? Yeah.

Do you if there's no outside stimulation from the world? There's wind. You're in an attic. Yeah, but dude, if you lay down, you don't remember laying down by the time you're like six,. Yeah, but dude, if you lay down, you don't remember laying down by the time you're like six, seven, eight years old, you're laying down and being like, whoa, okay.

You're like rolling around. Yeah, well, lay down over here. Laying down? Yeah. Yeah. So yeah, I mean, you definitely, yeah, dude, he was a king gooner up there. He had nothing but time.

Yeah, eventually he starts to look at the Lorax like it's a rocket. Yeah, I said it's how he started the fire, just whack off. No, but seriously, folks, that guy was getting them in. Yeah. I mean, at like a prolific rate. Is he the king of bad beats?

He goes, uh. That's all he does. It's a hostage beat? Yeah, the only muscle he had was in his forearms. Yeah, he comes out just... He's all for it. I mean, honestly, you would get so good at it. He should whack guys off for money now.

But put him with a woman. That's probably the thing he's best at right now. Does he know what to do? No, of course not. He could be a double in White Lotus. Yeah, no, he doesn't know what to do with a woman. I barely, you know, it's still kind of a mystery. Yeah, but he was like 68 pounds though.

It seems like you would wanna kind of preserve all your mass. Yeah, and energy. Well, there's not much else to do except stay alive. But they said sometimes, he said sometimes he would get a sandwich. What does that mean? I don't know but it's

not every day. Sounds like me. If you're describing not eating him, sometimes he has a sandwich. Yeah. Like tries to cut down on carbs. Yeah. Oh wow. Yeah so there's you have a whole New York Times article about this like yeah. What else did you learn? What's up with the mom? It doesn't it just says it well the the focus of the article really is they talk to the two sisters but they haven't been able to track him down like they were separated from him at birth. Oh, they didn't live in the house with him. They did also have two other sisters there

that were not birthed, but basically, they just, I mean, obviously it's just a cruelty case, right, it's just that the mom, you see this, it's the stereotype of the evil stepmother, basically. You know the deal. She doesn't want this leftover child. Stepmother videos I usually. No.

Did you see pictures of the house? I see the one right here, yeah it looks. Filthy hoarding. Oh inside, the outside's not bad. Inside it's pretty rough. Yeah that's not that big of a shock I suppose. Let's pretty bad. Inside, it's pretty rough. Yeah, that's not that big of a shock, I suppose. Let's see here. She should have like live streamed them or something

and profited off it or something, you know? You guys see that documentary, that Japanese game, talking about those Japanese shows, you see the one with the guy who was basically in the Truman Show. He was like in this game show. Is it real? Yeah, it's real.

What's it called? Japanese Truman Show. If you just put that in, you're gonna get it. How would, it's real. What's it called? Japanese Truman. If you just put that in, How would they say it? You're gonna get it. I don't know what the Japanese call it, but he had no idea. He was, you know, didn't know what he was getting

himself into, but he was basically in this box by himself, and they were like, your only way to eat is like, with these coupons you gotta like mail off and stuff. And they just filmed it for like a year, and then they reveal it at the end. They like pull the box out and he's like in a live studio audience and he like loses his mind.

It's kind of insane. Damn. The contestant. The contestant, yeah. It's a sick documentary. Yeah, you seen it? Oh yeah, I watched it. I watched a couple of interviews with him afterwards,

like how it's affected his life and the shame that it's affected his life and The shame that is brought upon his family in Japan Throw a rock right? Shame. You're probably gonna have shame. Let's see here. We talked about this when it was announced but Blue Origin has completed their first space trip with an all-female crew. It's big for you guys. Don't make that face. Aren't you fired up? You can go to space. Yeah, with Katy Perry.

That's right. That's right. And um... Katy Perry was there? Katy Perry's an astronaut now? Katy Perry went to space. Gale King. Oops. It's time to begin the hunt. Is that me? That's me. Clicked on a story about the guy in the attic.

About the stepmom. Yeah, Amanda Winn, who is a bioastrodotics research assistant. A woman named Aisha Bo, who's a former NASA rocket scientist, the best of the best, and Lauren Sanchez, who is the guy who owns the rocket's fiance. The Houston Rockets?

No. Okay, cool. It's just, I don't, everything is perfect. She got, she has like a hot ass space suit. Like everyone got mad at her for the inauguration forever and her tits out. She's like, oh. She looks hot in the space suit? What are you, no, of course, yeah.

She got like a form fitting, like she looks great. Katy Perry? Oh, Bezos is Beyonce. Oh, oh, Blue Origin is his, that's right. Yeah. They took off in Van Horn. How long are they in space? It's fake space, bro, it's not even.

Yeah, it's like a flight. It's a 10 minute flight. Yeah. Sanchez said, God, just imagine the wealth of knowledge. Does this diminish? Yes. Okay, so, People Magazine. Lauren Sanchez, Katy Perry, and Gayle King

show off sexy designer astronaut suits for all female space flight. Does that just, this diminishes it all. Okay, but seriously though, yes it does. So couple that with. We gotta put him in a sexy suit. We gotta have, yeah, now, is this a Trump is in and then it's back type thing?

Cause like a year ago they were trying to turn the rabbit from Space Jam into a little more low. Lola, Lola. Lola. And now, are we yanking back the other way? She's hot again. But just think about the wealth of human knowledge that we've created in the 5,000 years

there have been human beings. And we can build rockets and we go to space and we have philosophers and we created numbers. Sanchez was quoted after her trip to space as saying quote, I feel I don't even know how much it's going to change me. One of my first bits. She went to a drive through. She's just like, I don't know.

What do you want me to say? I guess. Cool, whatever. One of my first bits that I was trying on stage was about how like we were gonna go to Mars But by that point it's gonna be like people from like Gen Z or Gen Alpha So like the first words on Mars you think about the first words on the moon. They were very profound and You know one small step for man one giant leap for mankind, but you know First words on Mars are probably gonna start with will be an advertisement. Yeah, make sure you like and subscribe.

Yeah, right. Yeeted under the red planet. The contestant, I'm interested. We kinda have a yay boo from over the weekend. Blake, do you want me to play the opens that you like so much or are you good? We'll pass. Man drowned while swimming in the Trinity River.

That's a... That's a yay? That's the boo. Oh. Oh, okay. That's no good. The... Current pulled him under?

Yeah, West Fork. Hit his head or? Actually, what's interesting is a homicide detective has been assigned to the case. This was around four o'clock yesterday afternoon, West Fork, Trinity River, very popular area. Fort Worth dive team recovered the man's body. I'd like to talk to a diver.

I'd like to talk to a police or probably much more accessible than like a Navy diver, but I'd like to talk to one of those guys. Like you're on the Fort Worth dive team. I have to imagine there's some crossover the tryouts right? How long you've been on you've got a scuba certification so he does yeah, that's true So I get I wonder if that's a lot of what it is like if you're a Dallas Fire Dallas police and you're you go to Cancun sometimes they're like fuck you got yeah, you're on the dive team. Yeah, I don't know

I wonder though, right? Uh-huh. Like, Fort Worth is big, but it's not, like, it's near an ocean. Yeah, how often do you need a dive team in Fort Worth? Does every major city have a dive team? Yeah, I mean, do you need, I feel like most of the dive rescues in Fort Worth

are in above ground pools. Like, you don't, you don't really need scuba gear. Would they be Tarrant County's dive? Like would they go to Grapevine Lake? Well that's what I'm saying, I don't know. But the Trinity River. The Tarrant County's like no this is our trip.

The Trinity River is dangerous. We gotta dive to you. Yeah, you're out of your jurisdiction. Yeah, you know, there's always that battle on TV. Yeah, no, I don't know, but. Then the FBI comes in, hey, we got a dive team. Oh, god damn it. So that was the boo, but 10 UNT students were rescued

from Lake Ray Roberts from over the weekend. were rescued from Lake Ray Roberts from over the weekend. That's the team that stays on the top of the water did that. The above surface team. Right, we have a dive team. Right. And just the float, yeah, the float team. I've never had to be rescued on water. I've dealt with the game warden or whatever they are.

Is that what you call the people who write tickets on lakes? Is it game warden? I've dealt with them before for hey, let me see the life jackets and. Oh really? Let me check to make sure you have no glass. Oh yeah. But I've never been, I don't think I've ever,

I definitely have friends. What's the no glass thing? You're not supposed to have glass on a boat. Yeah. Why? I don't think I've ever, I definitely have friends. What's the no glass thing? You're supposed to have glass in a boat. Yeah. Why? I don't know. They'd rather you have plastic and then litter the.

You have cans. I don't know, I mean you definitely don't have glass on the beach. No, broken glass. Yeah. Have you ever been swept by a current? Like obviously you're still alive. That's what I'm saying, no, but have you,

yeah, had to be rescued? No, I didn't have to be rescued, but I didn't have control for five seconds, and it was terrifying. What kind of a boat? We were doing, we were floating a river. Okay. And there was just one part where it goes down,

I got, fell off my tube or something, it got swept under for a little bit, thought I was gonna die, it was horrible. Probably why I hate water. Hate water? Is this a, I feel like I've known you while I didn't know you hate. No, you knew I was anti-lake.

Okay. And I don't know that I knew you were anti-lake. I've seen it go to a lake and not get in when other people did. I've seen that happen. And I've been to Jake's house where literally every single person was in the pool and I wasn't. Did they have to give you like mouth to mouth or you know no no like it was fine

It was just it was just scary for myself wasn't rescued no attention, but it's briefly registering that you could drown Yeah, if you've ever almost drowned. I was a lifeguard. I had saved a couple people once Wow dude twice I guess Yeah heroes, and then I I was lifeguard at a Waterpark to once and then but but where were you before? Just at a pool. Okay, like a community pool. You got a promotion got it the weird thing about being a lifeguard at a pool There's like no lifeguards where you need them all the lifeguards are at the top of the slides Yeah, like you they're just monitoring every all the bad the lifeguards are at the top of the slides. Yeah. And like they're just monitoring every, all the bad stuff is at the heavens

at the bottom of the slide. Was the lake a part of Ohio summer growing up? Oh yeah, my dad had a boat once they got divorced. He bought a Boston Whaler Montauk 17, which means it's 17 footer. And we'd go, you know go water skiing every other weekend. It was great. Well, in the case of these UNT students, it was paddle boards.

It was canoes. They had to be rescued by paramedics. Now, I think this is the funniest part of the story to me. There's 10 students. One student was taken to the hospital for hypothermia. That sucks. Not that you had hypothermia, but there was only one of you. Because now you're cold, big boy. You're the weak one. Yeah.

Blah, blah, blah. Chatted with your teeth when you're cold over there. All right, there's your news. Jared's next. Indeed he is. The dumb zone. We'll never be on time. You like. We be on time.

We're on time. The Dumb Zone. You're listening to The Dumb Zone. Let's promote DZTV tonight and every night Monday through Friday on Channel 27 in Dallas. You can get the Fox Local app even if you're not in Dallas. The WAP? Do they call it that? No, but they-

Or are you trying to do a wet ass joke there? Well, they do have the WAP. I don't appreciate it. Are you trying to do a wet ass joke there? Well they do have the WAP. I don't appreciate it. They do have the WAP and I've been interested in it for a long time and it occurs to me now we have the opportunity to talk to whoever created the Fox Four Weather app which they called the WAP and they rolled it out roughly nine months before Megan Thee Stallion and they still have to have, you know,

they still have to promote it. It's been a lot of money on the back end here. A penny for their thoughts. We could absolutely interview that person. Is all I'm saying. But yeah, the Fox Local app is great. Promote that, promote Vinny's show. That's right.

Addison Improv, next Thursday night, he's headlining. I asked him how to get tickets, he was like, I don't know, just Google it. That's probably what you do. It really is, why don't we all just cut the crap. Is it the Addison Improv night? He's filming it, pressure. Does that come with an upfront cost?

These guys owed me a favor. Okay. So, but I was gonna film it in September, but I was like, I don't know if it was ready yet. And so I just held off on it, but man, the material is really humbling. So that's how good this show will be. It's gonna be a good one.

He has worked on it an extra what, five, six, seven, I don't know how to add months. Yeah. A long time yeah is it you're doing 45 probably do like 50 55 have you done that yet anywhere else in like a smaller row yeah yeah for sure so Jared Sandler is ready we're doing our weekly with Jared Sandler are you there Jared we're not really welcoming you yet but we want to make sure it actually works and doesn't that's okay but Jared is involved in baseball tangentially mm-hmm and keep talking until we can hear you yeah just keep talking because

we cannot hear Jared at this moment and that means Clay and Blake are gonna get get to work on that. But baseball, known for chewing tobacco and things like that. I'd like to offer those boys an alternative to that. Check, check, check. There you are, Jared. We're gonna talk about Lucy.

It'd be a better way to get your nicotine, I think, personally. Why don't you roll into the clubhouse and let the boys know about Lucy Lucy co Dumbzone use promo code dumb zone. You'll get 20% off your first order It's a hundred percent pure nicotine. I'm a big fan of the Apple ice rolled some of these Dan's way down on our Trip down. Yeah, so I didn't realize you can get them in different levels of strength.

You certainly can folks. So I'm like, oh, I think I gotta pop like three of these in. No, you can just pop one if you have a 12. Yep. Which is what Jake had. Which is what I had. But you know, maybe you're a four. But you don't have to do all the spinning.

It's okay little fella. It's not dirty. It's great. No, very clean feeling. It's not owned by Big Tobacco. They're a little mom and pop, you know? Yes. They're the dumb zone of nicotine.

So go to lucy.co slash dumb zone, use promo code dumb zone, get 20% off. Hey Jared. Lucy products are only for adults of legal age. I thought you weren't gonna do that. And every order is age verified. Warning, this product contains nicotine. Nicotine is an addictive chemical boy

They love their nicotine and baseball folks. Here's Jared Sandler Here is Jared Sandler Okay It's like the torpedo bed of nicotine, huh? Okay! We've been getting a new one of these every week. Yeah. The problem is they're long is they're all too long.

No one's ever said that about me. Hell yeah, we need to be in and out by 30. Just for those who want to make us a song. I told you guys last week, you mocked my jingles. Yeah This one's a little too long, but it doesn't change the fact that we're here with Jared and he's so wonderful Jesus Christ that bed just let it go Really feeling that pentatonic scale Solid what's up Jared you're back teacher over back. Music teacher over there. Are you back? I'm back.

I'm back. I'm back in warmer weather. Let me tell you something, Seattle was better than Chicago, but it wasn't that much better. So I'm excited for 74 degrees in Globe Life Field tomorrow. Yeah, I saw you all bundled up in Chicago. That kind of felt like an insult. That was tough. Well, no, they all were really. They were all wearing their.

Did you get free Ranger gear for that? I know. I mean, no, I didn't. It's funny. I'm a male. And so Rangers third base coach Tony Beasley didn't offer to get me a beanie, but he did offer Laura Stickels a beanie. I've known's for 11 years. I don't know, you know, come on B's, hook me up. But I didn't ask for a blanket. You guys, you guys would be happy to know I didn't ask anyone for a blanket. Years ago, Jared was an intern for the ticket and he came down with us to training camp in San Antonio. the ticket and he came down with us to training camp in San Antonio and Jared got arrested because he was trying to pass his fake ID off as real and he actually argued with the bouncer about it trying to tell him that this is actually bro I get in anywhere at USC with this and the guy just said

alright well then how about we just arrest you? And then they arrested him, put him in jail for the night. And the story was that Jared, little Jared, was cold and he went and asked the guard for a blanket and he got laughed at. But it took what? Ten years later, you refute that story now. You say no no that never happened. First of all I didn't argue with the bouncer I just didn't run away when he took my ID inside and no I never once asked for a blanket but that never happened I did I did try and I did try and go to the bathroom over a guy who had taken a nap in front of the toilet and he was upset when he woke up and saw my stream that was Yeah, but there was no it was cold, but I did not ask for a blanket, but it was

Hypothermia first right? Yeah, they'll give you the hug the blanket in jail if you ask I didn't but I've seen someone ask before Well, you know that for next year for that. Yeah, that's true. That's true. Yeah yours. I guess that I'll be running that for next time. I was too hard for that. Yeah that's true. That's true. Yeah. Jared's like, I'll be running the show next time, trust me. So later today, later during this stream, are we going to give away more tickets to the Rangers? Okay because Jared loves trivia. I've just noted this. Are you the guy, so you during the the pregame and the postgame show on Victory Plus, are you the guy responsible for, um, there's a lot of trivia on that show. Yeah, so I, we don't do it because of me. Um, basically what happened was we were

figuring out the things that we wanted to include and not include. My boss, Angie Swent, who listens to the radio as well as watches on TV, would love when I would give trivia questions a lot of times during blowouts to Matt and Eric. Last year, I started actually posting a trivia question on Twitter and Instagram every single day. And so she was like, no, we want this to be a part of it. And so I come up with the questions just from a graphic standpoint, from the visual side,

I'm limited to coming up with questions that have answers that are no more than four items. So sometimes the questions, I think last week the question I maybe asked on here was like an adaptation of the one we used that night on air. But yeah, I do. To me, the most fun type of trivia is like, I call it list trivia. I don't know. That's probably not the right name, but it's, hey, there are five people who have done this. Who are they? And you get to sit around and debate like Hey, was it this guy? No, wasn't this guy because he didn't quite get there. It wasn't that guy whatever But I think that like sports trivia like that is so much fun. And that's hopefully

Hopefully people watching and listening to the same way. Okay. I have a trivia hint for you. The worst trivia to give is When there's a number for an answer Don't like doing the numbers. I agree. I don't like the numbers. I don't like the binary questions. Uh, no, I, I, yeah. What does that mean?

I think, well, it's like, it's one or the other, like a yes or no. Did, did Juan Gonzalez ever win an MVP? Like to me that, that sucks. Like that's right. But the number thing, cause then you sit around guessing numbers. Is it 12? Nope. Did Juan Gonzalez ever win an MVP? Like to me, that sucks. Right, but the number thing, because then you sit around guessing numbers. Is it 12? Nope.

Right, yeah, I don't like that. What about 15? Unless it's like a significant number, but yeah, I agree. LeBron James led the NBA in scoring in whatever year. How many points did he average? Like, that's thick. Like I can go on Google.

I also want to do trivia questions where like, yeah, you could probably look it up because it's the internet. You can look up just about everything, but like you're going to have a little bit of a time investment to look it up if you're going to look up the answers. And I guess I thought of this because I know you love giving us trivia.

In fact, you like to text some trivia now and again, just for fun. That's a guy who loves sports. But also like the, like when you tune into, when you watch some Victory Plus later, like I don't watch it live necessarily. Number one, I love it because they will take out, oddly enough, they'll take out commercials. They'll take out like the commercial break, but then they'll leave in like a promo for Victory Plus. And then I can't fast forward through it. So I'm like, what are we doing here? Why do I can't? Okay. But in the, the still image, sometimes it's just like today's Rangers trivia. And I'm like, is Jared making them do this? Because Jared, like he'll text us trivia and he just loves his trivia. So, all right.

That's a good looking product. I didn't force it. I went, do you, if you guys, well, Jake still hasn't given me words to you. So I guess he must not be. I was going to ask if you guys have any thoughts on any of the segments, but Jake still hasn't given me any words. I mean, here's the thing. I got an email. I think we just go with the email. I don't know what his line or limit is,

and I'm all dirty, so I don't know. I don't wanna get him in trouble. What do you think? It can be a feeling out process. All right, I want you to work in, this is not from the email. Axe wound. Axe wound. Axe wound. That's easy. Oh, easy he says. And gash. Yeah, axe wound is easy. Gash and axe wound or

just axe wound. And vagina. Yeah. Okay, that one I'll pass on. Unless there's a player, you know, the Royals. What if a guy is like a pussy? Can you say pussy? Well, no, but the Royals have a coach named Rusty Koontz and he spells his last name KU and TZ. So if someone like Grady Dick, I can say Dick if Grady Dick played. So who's he think he's talking to? One was like, think we don't know about Rusty Koontz, bro. No, I'm just saying, like, yeah.

But yeah, Vagina probably not'm just saying, like, yeah. But, yeah, vagina probably not gonna work its way into the broadcast. Well, that was a joke. Dan's ridiculous, though, because you know, mine would be more like, you know, rather than that filthy stuff, like, maybe have you waded into some news stories or international conflict or something.

Give me an example. Boy, he bashed that one all the way from the river to the sea, didn't he, folks? Um, I guess maybe if someone could get away with that, maybe I could. Yeah, exactly right. Yeah. And I mean, he is also African-American, so there are plays available. Oh, my God. Vinny, where do you fall on that? You could say Nizzle. If you. Where do you fall on that?

If his his dad was born in South Africa. Right. He's African-American. Yeah. Yeah. That's his lineage. Yeah. So Robert says. D.I. higher over here. Robert's suggestion for the Jared Sandler password he says I'm a Jonah Heim man are you a high man if you were we'd both be high men so can

you somehow work in the word men after heim what we're working on here I think what would be really cool is if we, you know, it would probably help if he were like, hitting the ball. None of them really are, but the section in the stands, like, you know, just a bunch of wild. The Heim men, yeah. Yeah. The Heim men.

Yeah, we're all up there with, I don't know, that's pretty much the end of what I had. When they had that fan section for Bruce Arians. Yeah, yeah, that's right. fan section for Bruce Arians. Yeah. Yeah, that's right The Aryan nation, right? Yeah Wow, oh Now it's why speaking of the offense Yeah

Not a lot there right now. No, I saw a tweet you do for twig for trivia named the team with of I do for Twitter for trivia named the team with Of a hundred and seventy seven qualified batters in MLB the team that has three in the bottom thirteen It's tough we do positive trivia yes Yeah, no, it's it has been tough and you know losing white Langford didn't help because he was one of the guys who was producing You know the Rangers really need The beauty and the curse of baseball is that it's not like the NBA where one guy, like Luke could put a team with Reggie Bullock on his back and get deep into the playoffs. In the NFL, you get a quarterback who's just like, they can totally change the complexion

of your franchise. And even in hockey, come play playoff time if you've got a goalie who just is playing out of his mind then you could maybe sneak up and win a few series that you otherwise couldn't but in baseball I mean we've seen it the angels had show Hayo Tani and they couldn't even really sniff the playoffs right one guy doesn't make the difference so I you know typically when a team struggling you get asked the question, who's the one guy? I would nominate two. I mean, the Rangers need production out of their leadoff spot. So that's been Marcus Simeon with the exception of one game. And then they need Jack Peterson to get going because Jack Peterson has the ability, the capacity to really be a big producer in the middle of the order.

But he's over his last 24 and he's just really struggled. And it's early, you know, you've played what 16 games, that's one tenth of the season, you know, to put that in perspective, but they do need to get things going. Now, luckily, they're nine and seven. They're not, you know, five and eleven or whatever, but You know, they've certainly won nine games largely in spite of the bats and and they desperately need to get things going last year's Fastballs this year. They've actually been a little bit better against fastballs It's everything else and it's the chase and it's the swing and miss and it's also things like against Brian Wu

On Saturday, they made him throw 20 something pitches in the first inning But then he pitched six more innings after that. He didn't throw more than 13 pitches in a single inning And so when you're not forcing the starting pitcher to work, maybe that guy's a badass But if you're forcing them to throw pitches, maybe you get them out of the game earlier get to the bullpen and you know Take your crack at a lesser pitcher but them out of the game earlier, get to the bullpen and you know take your crack at a lesser pitcher. But for the most part that really hasn't been happening when this lineup has struggled. Do you have any sort of diagnosis for Simeon or way baseball go? I see that like the Babbitt is super super super low but you know the player does have some control over that.

So what do you think? Yeah you know the' Babbitt as a team is super low, and it would be very easy for me if I wanted to, I could come up here and say, well, yeah, the Babbitt's super low, they've just been getting unlucky, but they're not hitting a lot of line drives, right? The Babbitt, the point of Babbitt is that it's most effective over large sample sizes, and so if after 160 games the rangers had a super low bad then i'd say they've got really unlucky but just sixteen games and.

They're not hitting the ball hard enough to justify that level of grace you know with marcus. You know with Marcus Gosh, yeah, I mean He's not hitting. I don't think he's gotten a hit off of a single non fastball and he's not really crushing fastballs either I think I saw something yesterday just taking a look. He's over 19 on it That's that end in a breaking ball or an off speed pitch. And so Yeah They just You know, a lot of people are wondering whether Marcus is because of

his age, he's 34 and because of his workload. I mean, he has been an Ironman relative to what an Ironman is in baseball these days, if he's starting to slow down. I think the Rangers would like to do what they did on Sunday, which is give him a few more days off sprinkled in to help him recharge and with today off as well just in the schedule. I'm curious what it looks like tomorrow. Does he come back kind of refresh recharge that they need him in the lineup because they need him hitting because he absolutely has a place in this lineup. He's so good defensively at

second but now the question is where is he that where does he best fit in the lineup. And I think you're kind of a point where. You're not in like panic mode like this offense isn't as good as what we thought it would be i think this offense is gonna be really good still. But i do think it's fair to ask who who is the best fit in the leadoff spot is it marcus do you give him a little more runway or do you give someone else a shot there and my if you were to. give someone else a shot there. If you were to complain about the leadoff spot, then you need to have a solution. My solution when he is healthy is White Langford. I would like to see White Langford lead off and have the Rangers line up start Langford Seeger if you are going to make a change for Marcus Simeon. Can I make a suggestion? Float the idea of Marcus Simeon to catcher. You have a Simeon catcher.

I was sitting on that one for a long time. I'm sorry, it didn't pay off like I thought, but. I'm just imagining if you made that suggestion to Bruce Bochy, he'd kind of look at you. A little perplexed. Speaking of- With his massive head. I don't know, you probably had something, Dan, if you want to try to regain momentum,

but the year before they won the World Series, they went 68 games and Simeon played all of them. And I wasn't paying much attention to that at the time, but I do recall Rangers fans then, it was Woodward being like, why is this guy playing, he was 31, 32 at the time. Why is he playing 161, 162 games at that? And at that time I was like, well. That's his bit.

That's his bit, I know, but now, I don't know, maybe it also brings up the question of if he never gets back to what he was, it was worth it. Yeah, no, he might not. Not what he was, but you know what I mean. To where he's productive. Not what he was, but you know what I mean. To where he's productive. Right now he's a liability. He's a liability.

I mean, obviously if he hits like he's hit this year, then that's no bueno, but I think it's gonna obviously get better. But if you take what he did last year, and he hits how he hit last year, which was a down year for him offensively, but you have him hitting seventh, eighth, or ninth. Is that the guy you paid for necessarily

when you signed him to the free agent contract? No, but last year when you factor in defense, he was a four win player. And four win players are typically all-star players. Now, no one's gonna look at Marcus's offensive numbers last year and say all star, but you know, he was a four win player because of what he does on the bases and what he does and not necessarily stealing bases is a very good base runner, but defensively,

if you have a four win player batting seventh, eighth or ninth, you'll take that. Oh yeah, for sure. Yeah. So, so it might not be that he's, you know, and he needs to be in a lineup because he is going to be a, uh, uh, you know, a positive wind player for you, even if the offense is equal to what it was last year. I just think, he might not be eight 30 OPS guy, but I think he could definitely be seven 50 OPS guy and seven 50 OPS guys.

That's going to be again, a four to five one player for you. Maybe even five to six wind player if he gives you the same level of defense he gave you last year. I just have something I thought was amusing from Friday. And so Friday, um, you said Seattle is the Emerald city. What does that mean? Why are they the Emerald city? I guess I've always known it as the Emerald city. What does that mean? Why are they the Emerald City? I guess I've always known it as the Emerald City.

I don't know why. It's one of those things I never really... I know that they're also known as the Jet City because of some of the Boeing stuff, but let's see. The Fish City. I think of the fish market. I think of just the color emerald. I have no... just the mariners, the seahawks, the city. There's a lot of forests in Seattle. Emeraldy. A lot of vegetation fish market. I think of just the color emerald. I have no idea. Just the mariners, the seahawks, the city just feels emerald-y. All right. Yeah. Well, they're like just a question I had for you. That's my trivia question for you, Jared. Why is Seattle called the Emerald City? I think it has to do something with what was just said about just a very green kind of the

environmental city. Okay well then you didn't need to say it again. They're one of those teams that fits into the thing that I've talked about before with like Pittsburgh. Like all of Seattle's teams have a similar color scheme. I love that about it. I love that bit. It's fantastic. We can't even get the same blue on the helmet and the pants and the jersey. It's four blues, folks. You know, the Mavs colors are actually just the same as the Vegas Golden Knights.

Did you know that? It might be. I don't know. Anyway, here, I heard you Friday saying this. I have two pieces of audio. and I really thought this was funny. So this is from the pregame show Friday. The Rangers are beginning their divisional schedule tonight. And well, some people believe that these are the two best teams in the AL West.

Of course, you can't forget about the Astros and then they're the Angels and the Athletics, and you don't want to discount anyone this early in the season. But divisional games are big. Okay, so we heard that, and then you brought on Dave Raymond a moment later. And the good news, ending that series in Chicago, Corey Seager with a multi-home run game as you bring in Dave Raymond and Mike Basick.

And guys, we know that when Corey gets going, he is a force in the middle of that lineup. And it was nice to see him hit the long ball not once but twice on Wednesday in that series finale victory Hey, just to clarify though Jared. I if I heard it correctly and Mike you can help me on that, too So Seattle and the Rangers clearly the best two in the division. Yeah But you can't count out Houston, Oakland. You know what? Hey, I, my opinion. That was well done by Dave. Yeah, that was well done.

I feel like Dave is always looking to trip you up somehow. Yep. In my head, I was thinking, you know what, should, we're so early in the season, should I at least acknowledge the fact that there are three other teams, including the angels who surprisingly are the best team in the division right now? But no, I should have just left it as I think these are the two best teams in the division. I mean, I don't care about Houston and their feelings. So they get upset, whatever. No, but I mean, it wouldn't be the first time I've like upset someone on Twitter who's an Astros fan. I, I, yeah, I think those are the two best teams in the division. The Mariners obviously swept the Rangers.

So they, if you didn't know anything else other than those three games, you would definitely think one team was better than the other. But I think what all is said and done, those are the two best teams. I think the angels will drop off. They're a cute story right now. I just don't think the Astros have a whole lot going for them. The wild card team for me is the Athletics. I think maybe they can use that ballpark to their advantage. I think they've got a chance to be the third best team in the division. But to me, the two best are the Rangers and the Mariners. But Dave was very good on Dave to call me out for that.

Don't count out the angels. Don't count them all, any of them out. You know, they got Wash at the, Wash is still there, right? Wash is there, yeah. Okay, good. So we're gonna do trivia now, where Jared gives away tickets to an upcoming Rangers game.

And this trivia will be brought to us by Tito's Handmade Vodka. If you have a watch, say what again? Sorry. No, I wanted to go on your Tito's read. Yeah, I'm going to tell you stuff about Tito's like it's America's favorite vodka for a reason, a spirit that knows how to focus on what's important. That's why it comes in a standard bottle with a modest paper label. So all you pay for is the high quality vodka inside. Tito's is six times distilled, til it's just right, naturally gluten-free and mixes with just about anything. From the smoothest martinis to the best Bloody Marys,

we are fired up to be associated with a brand like Tito's because not only is it known for great vodka, but for giving back by teaming up with nonprofits around the world to serve its communities and do good for dogs. It is the vodka for dog people after all. Find your new favorite cocktail with Tito's by visiting Tito'sVodka.com, distilled and bottled by fifth generation incorporated Austin, Texas,

40% alcohol by volume, distilled from corn, copyright 2025, crafted to be savored responsibly. crafted to be savored responsibly. Thanks guys. I thought I did a great job there. Crushed it. Follow that Jared. I can't. Trivia time with Jared Sandler. All right. Can I give you my random stat of the day first though? Take it away Jared. Go ahead. All right. Hobie Milliner leads leads majorly baseball with three strikeouts with the bases loaded. And he had a couple of them yesterday to get out of the big jam. So that's your random stat of the day. That is not our trivia. Our trivia is this.

With the angels coming to town, Mike Trout on a short list of players who had multiple or had a 40 homerun season before completing his age 24 season. There are however nine players who had multiple 40 homerun seasons before their age 24 season was complete. Three of those nine played for the Rangers. Who are they? Jesus, that was a long question. What did you say? Nine players have had multiple 40 home run seasons through their age 24 season. Three of those nine played for the Rangers. This is like the Mavs trying to tell me how this game was so good by Anthony Davis. Okay, well, do we play along?

He's the only guy with under... Everybody... Yeah, let's... It's an obvious one, right? Yeah, one's gotta be A-Ring. Okay, so say it again. Nine players have had... Go ahead.

Yeah, nine players had multiple campaigns of 40 or more home runs before the completion of their age 24 season. Nine players have played for the Rangers. Yeah, 40 or more. Three of them played for the Rangers. They didn't necessarily do it with the Rangers, but three of them played for the Rangers. Okay. I have three in mind. You have three in mind?

So, A-Rod is the obvious, right? A-Rod is correct. Are we allowed to give away the things? You actually did it three times. Do you tell the answer to Blake so he knows if somebody won it? No. Like this is for the chat only, right? It'll come up on the show. Okay.

You want me to...Gallow, right? Gallo is correct. Oh really? He's the one I thought would be the most difficult just out of sight out of mind kind of Who's your guess it's not one Gonzalez, how about See I wasn't gonna guess one that seems too easy I was thinking it was somebody that joined them later, like Vlad or... But he would have been over 24 then. No, but he didn't do it with the range?

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, he didn't even necessarily do it with the range. Is it Josh Hamill? No, because he was in rehab through his age 24 season, I think. Oh, I see. Hero. Hero. Oh, I see. Hero. Hero. Oh yeah. I've given my guesses. All right, tell me. Jake, did

you submit an official guess with Juan Gonzalez? Yeah. Okay, that's correct. Yeah. Oh, nice. Okay. Yeah, Juan. Baseball, Jake. I thought Juan would be the easiest. I thought A-Rod just because I think people forget. It's like amazing that I hate to say this. A-Rod probably was the single best player to ever play for the Rangers, but because no one likes him, it's like totally forgotten about. It's really weird. It's basically feels like the inverse of Seager and Simeon to me.

It's like they're not really a part. Sometimes it doesn't always feel to us on the outside like there is much of a part of things but if people are like well we like them so it's kind of like yeah fine, fine. But the reason I know Gallo is I spent a lot of time when he was here just marveling at his baseball reference and fan graphs pages. There's nothing like it. There's just, there's nothing like it because back in the era when guys hit that many home runs, they were good at hitting. Like Mark McGuire and Sammy So- they were good hitters. But just staring at Galo's numbers. Hard to pull off, folks.

You know what his career batting average is? 200. Blake? Um... Below 200? I thought guessing games of numbers are not good. What did we just establish? This is not trivia, Dan. This is just a guess.

Well, no, I think guessing games- This is a conversation with a query. Yeah, but you don't just throw it around the horn then. Just answer is- Okay. Just yeah, we've2 enough time here 200 20 stop it just tell us 194 194 hitter but he is still he is still based on some of these metrics he's still an above-average career offensive performer

made a lot of money too all right Jared, we'll catch you on Victory Plus tomorrow. Sounds good fellas, we'll be working in the Heimdallm. All right, there he goes. The great Jared Sandler. There he is folks, goodbye. Tune into Jared. Today in history... Oh, I see it has a sponsor. The Dumb Zone presents Today in History. Today in History is brought to you by the CJCup

Byron Nelson with The Dumb Zone. That is Friday, May 2nd. Dumb Zone and the Mom Game will be out there. We'll also be joined by a Mike cash Roy as we go live from the 17th hole from 1 to 4 p.m. thanks to our sponsors Tito's handmade vodka bring your crew Dan and experience world-class golf as the pros take on TPC Craig ranch this is May 1st through 4th tournament has it all. Incredible food, cold drinks, and an unbeatable atmosphere, Blake. Sun, memories, and every swing with us. PGA TOUR tickets are on sale now. The CJ Cup, ByronNelson.org. Kids under free, Blake? Free. Free? Did you say kids under free? Free? Kids under 15 free. Okay. Oh, under 15.

Anyways, stop by the Tito's Clubhouse at the 17th hole, raise a Tito's Transfusion to your day on the green. Distilled bottle by Fifth Generation Incorporated Austin, Texas. 40% alcohol by volume. Savor responsibly, Dan. Good job, bro.

Sorry. Couple of birthdays. Golf. I get nervous. Oh, you gotta read it like this Will be out at the Friday May 2nd there ever been an event like this voice is so deep because I've been sneezing unbelievable So a few birthdays dear uncle horse whisperer, this is Thursday that's disgusting This is from Thursday. Shout out to my son. J men a gay. It's his Luca minus Henry Melton birthday

Henry Melton Wow blast from the past. It's a Mustang Leaders are CD lamb the Ranger robots Seeger and Semi in The Dallas Stars and anybody with a cool sports celebration This is all I got him for a birthday present, so make it good for me. He would like a shout out for his eight you baseball team from the Colleyville Stars. Eight you. Yeah. There's a little kid, Chris Menegay. This is from there's a pretty good chance that if I ran into a group

comprised of that team, I'd be scared. Not eight. I don't know man, Collyville, there's some eye black in there somewhere, I promise you. There's a little kid in there that. They got torpedo bats. Oh, no doubt, yeah, yeah. Olaf Fartbox Führer.

You could kick an eight year old's ass. I know that I could kick his ass. I could kick all their asses at once, but the swag factor they bring to the shop is intimidating. You'll lose that battle. It's baseball, dude. It's an upper tier baseball suburb. They got exposed chains and stuff.

No doubt. Today is my roommate's neon with a with Raven's birthday. Say that one more time. Today is my roommate's Dion with the Raven's birthday. As a member of the Mexican delegation San Antonio has better Tex-Mex and Mexican food than Dallas. Who's debating that? Yeah. Yeah. I met Jake at Fortress Fest. Oh, nice. More rap, Jake Z. And that's Oak Cliff, that's my hood, Saroy. This is from Abel.

Good dude. You don't know anything about him. I remember. What is Fortress Fest? Uh, it was just a music festival in Fort Worth. They had over at the park. Rap, I'm assuming? No, it was just all types.

Dear Chowbox Boss, I wanna wish my brother John Hexam happy birthday. I don't like that. I don't know. There was no better birthday gift to him than not having Sarah Heppela on Friday's episode. Jesus. His leader is Dan.

He lives by the guiding principle, I will do everything I can to get her to stop talking and fire off that bra. More Dan, Jake, more F-word Blake. No. From Jim. Cost us enough. F-word or F-slur? It was slur. Today is my, this is another one from Friday, today is my Clay Times Derrick Lively birthday.

Longtime listener, first week subby. P1 from week one. Teacher and basketball coach in Frisco. My leaders are Sober Jake, Occasional Danny, and Lee Carso's smarmy and outrage. Whatever I said. Mike and McKinney. Now this is on to today's birthdays. Dan, you pussy pounding bastard. Today is my mean gene, the hit and machine birthday.

My heroes are Jake's, excuse me, Jake's Lake House Milfing Table, and Jimmy Nelson's ability to take 20 inches. More Jimmy, more Danny, more Michael Mooney, the right amount of Sarah Heppala, less Jasmine, always use an anchored string and a flared bass from Presley Malloy, day one, number 437. Presley Malloy.

P.S. I gain joy by using Nico sucks whenever they ask for a name for an order. Okay, that's a fun twist. I like that. Dear Uncle Hotmail, does my Luca, minus the hopes and dreams of every Mavs fan in the Metroplex. I Was not woken up in a special way because we're married. I

Started listening after the freak died My first free episode was the one with Reiner that Blake lost Son of a bitch, then I subscribed to get the one with KT only to find out it was a free show anyway My leaders are Jeff Kavanaugh's foreskin, Julie Dobbs' five head. Holy dude, I don't know you gotta read that. I'm just guessing that's some of their banter on the freak, I don't know. It's in the email.

I just have to read, this is a good subscriber. I agree. I'm gonna read your thing. Withdraw and read the thing, Doesn't matter what it says. How big's your head? Pfft. Pfft. This is from Marcus Taylor. Sorry Marcus.

And finally I have one from Rob Schindler who made that open today in history. Yeah the list too. My lovely wife Rachel and I would like to give a special birthday shout out to our grandson. Rob Schindler's a granddad? He looks way too young. Odin Johnson turns four today.

I love it, dude. Me too. Odin Johnson? Johnston, yeah. Either way. Odin's cool. It's like he played in the ABA. Ha.

Odin's cool. It's like he played in the ABA. Ha. Odin Johnston. Famed blues singer from. Leaders of the Rose Twins. For crushing musicians confidence, Brooke Jones's tumbling classes and Carter Kemp's love for running through retractable belt stanchions. Anyway, we have some stuff on this day in history, Monday, March 14th. This is the day that President Abraham Lincoln was shot

and killed in 1865. I always wondered what happened to that guy. You know, I read about that in the last year or so, pretty basic stuff, but I didn't know how long old boy was on the run afterward. It was a while. John Wilkes Booth? Mm-hmm. Oh yeah.

The whole story of like him fooling people into like, I'll just stay in your guest house. That's cool, man. We hate the Union too, or whatever. And it worked out for him quite well Actually, yeah, it's weird too. Does he yelled out six Emperor Taranis after killing the president? Which was a line from one of the plays he was acting in yeah I didn't know he was like an actor Like his mail went to

It makes sense now you think about it. That'd be like if the guy who played bore at killed the president and was like my wife, you know Dude, you you say that's not the craziest thing in the world Like we're gonna have like I don't know I might have gotten too big this weekend But I was thinking about like somebody tried to kill Trump. It just happened and we don't talk about it at all I don't even know the guy's name. Maybe he was trying to kill that firefighter behind him I know there's a conspiracy theories about it this that whatever Thomas Crooks somebody tried to kill the current most famous person on earth And nobody in here knows the person's name Thomas Crooks. This is like in the last year Thomas Crooks Yeah, you're right. I have heard it

I bought the demolition ranch shirt like the day but it's not would you know if he was successful? Oh You would yeah, yeah, but it's just weird that it happened and I don't know It just seems like it Kind of came and went look like it to me It feels like the only way it will be memorable if is if it's somebody in character. Yeah, maybe maybe it was all scripted Possible you see Trump's seems like you would be wanted to talk about that a lot. Trump's what? I thought you were going to bring up Trump's physical in the news. You know, it's the same one he's done every time.

But yeah, when they list him at 6'2". He's like Derek Henry. Yeah, they always put. The cops are amazing. Current NFL players standing next to him in a picture. This day in 1912, This is when the Titanic collided with an iceberg and Then began sinking Boy, it happened at 1140 p.m. Find out tomorrow. What happened to this Titanic?

On this day in 1960 never seen that whole movie me neither. It's good Well, I bet you think it is. I don't spoil the ending for you. I think I just reflexively hated it because all the girls It's just all any female I knew watched for like two years. The VHS I don't know if you remember it was like two VHS tapes that they would. Oh, that's right. It was like a big bulky Collection. Yeah, I haven't thought about the double VHS in a minute Get like roots or something. That was in VHS era? Yeah, the end of it. For sure.

Yeah, I'd always get mad, because I could remember which VHS had the tits in it. And so I put the first one in, rewind. Just bark it. On this day in 1965, Richard Hickok and Perry Smith were hanged, or hung? Hanged? They were hanged. Yeah, I think hung a picture. Hanged a person. Hanged a picture. Of Herbert Clutter and his family. That's the In Cold Blood murders.

Oh yeah. Great book. You ever read that? Mm-hmm. This day in 1984, the Texas Board of Education required that the state's public school textbooks describe evolution of human beings as theory rather than fact. Yeah, jury's out. On this day in 1994, two Air Force F-15 warplanes mistakenly shot down two US Army Black Hawk helicopters over Iraq, killing 26 people. That killed Pat Tillman?

No. I think it did. No. That was a friendly fire. He didn't die at all. Well, this one was too. Yeah, that's- Is this Black Hawk Down or is that a different thing?

No. Black Hawk Down. Black Hawk Down was involving Black Hawk helicopters, but no, it was in the Balkans, right? Yeah. Oh, Godisiu. Yeah, you may be right. I bought the book a decade ago and then never read it, so I'm not sure what-

Mark Halpern, I think. What Black Hawk Down Downs about I've read a few books of his he's is the movie based off it Yeah, movies great movies pretty good But I've always thought that Going in and if you think possibly there was just a book and then the movie was not they're like, you know what? We're gonna name this black Hawk Down. It's not about this book. The book is actually a children's book. It's about a small bird who goes through a tough time. Keep your beak up. Yeah.

I've always thought though, I get extra bummed when I see accidental military deaths. My brother and I used to talk about that, because people will die in training, you know? Especially out in like 29 balls. Yeah, it's one thing to say I was killed by the enemy of our country. I know.

But another thing to say, yeah. Like, it's just the- Because I didn't clean the gun right or whatever. Or someone else didn't. Yeah. The absolute worst. Somebody plugged a coordinate in wrong, and you're like, a hero, and you're like, yeah, but.

That's tough. Does your family get anything out of that? That's what I'm saying. If you were to get free college or something out of your. Yeah, I imagine any casualty, whatever benefits go to those, they're not. Well, they probably do rank them some, but.

And on this day in 1996, was a huge Masters collapse Greg Norman and for the sixth time took a lead into the final round of a Grand Slam event only to lose and in today's birthday, oh wow. I knew I felt good from the second I woke up, man. Like the sun, I could hear like birds were chirping. The sun seemed extra radiant. It was delivering vitamins into my vein. How do you get vitamins from the sun? Explain that.

Holes in your skin. You take a pill. A pill, yeah. I'm worrying if I take that pill will lock it will that block? You just end up vitamin D deficient your doctor's like what's happening You see that? Yeah, 30 years old today Wow What a day. Only 30. You ever seen the video of him trying to run from the cops?

No. Just look it up sometime. Successfully? No. Oh, no. No. No, he's an NFL player. So you'd think he'd have a little shot, but no.

He may have been impaired in a way. No. Baker, no. Not Baker. Yeah. I think he did like a renewal of vows. After the Cheesecake Factory? Yeah.

He did like a, yeah. Like they recommitted to God. They attended a faith-based marriage conference. Yeah. Cheesecake Factory sent him to marriage rehab. Yeah. Cheesecake Factory sent him to marriage rehab. Yes. Can change a man. Would you ever do that?

Sure. Cheesecake Factory? You'd renew Vols? I mean. Would you invite us so we could heckle you? No, remember he's sliding on this. At one point he said he never would and now look at him. He's like, uh.

Well, yeah, but he's. You can tell he's disgusted. at one point. He said he never would and now look at him. He's like well Yeah, but he's you can tell he's a different gust it Like a long-term he kind of put her through something where he's not allowed to say no to stuff not too much No, what's up? I mean when you renew your vows that's like after like 25 years or like 40 I mean Baker Mayfield how long has he been married and he's already getting his vows renewed Yeah, I mean I think it was mainly just he got caught running around a lot. And she was like, all right, if we're gonna stay together. Right, look, I'll never do it again.

We'll prove it. Go to this thing. He's like, oh, I see. Do you know how awkward it is every, like, that restaurant is off the table. You know what's funny is I bet after, similar to like, I'm gonna make you smoke the whole pack, I bet you that after the Cheesecake Factory girl went public, I bet Baker Mayfield's fiance at the time

made him take her there. No, I don't, I don't know, PF Chang's is right next door. I think there's an, no. I want Cheesecake Factory. We've been to that parking lot. And she just sat there in silence the whole time. That's a fun thought. But then him being a smartass said,

we gonna do this or what? Yeah. He's making money, right? He signed up for a few more years. Yeah, it's not a DAC deal, but it is a- No, no, no, but I just mean he's not like very good on the way out we got it yeah he's he's good we're good we're good I think he had what'd he do last didn't he have like a significant he had a great year like

fantasy wise he was awesome last year he must have won a lot of playoff games I know it bothers you that you're good to bothers you that Baker will never have the career that Tony Romo had. Take whatever win I can get. Does he already have more playoff wins than Dak? I mean, he beat Pittsburgh for the Browns. Like how many players could say they've got the Browns a playoff win in the last 20 years?

He won one last year. There you go. So he's probably tied with Dak. Making half of what Dak is making. Did you guys see skinny Dak this weekend? I'm so sick of that. Oh no. Is he in the best shape of his life?

Yes of course he is. And then I think Dov Climen said something like, expect Lamar Jackson athleticism from Dak this year. I already was. Are you kidding me? I already was. He hurt his hamstring running. It's time to let Dak cook.

Shotty's known for it. Okay. Former Ranger Greg Zahn, 54. I don't know, dude dude there's a long story I don't think I could really explain but it was a Bob and Dan joke I was buddies with him or he was buddies with us or whatever I don't even remember the story chase young is 26 what happened to him I know. Is he not playing for the commanders anymore? Oh no. Saints?

He got traded. Patrick Surtan, 25. Paid? Yes, highest in NFL history? Highest what? Paid cornerback. Oh really? I think the Texans guy just got him.

Oh, did he beat him? The year after, yeah. It's two days after that Well, I haven't seen is Micah commenting on Sir Tan? I'm not sure but I did see that again because this is our year Micah is at the voluntary offseason program Oh wow Previous two years? No. He knows they're working on a contract extension. Why would you not show up while they're in talks? I mean, why would you not show up

when you know it's shoddy time? He won't make Thanksgiving. Shoddy? Greg Maddux 59. Will tonight be the night that I watch the Greg Maddux documentary? Will tonight be the night that I watch the Greg Maddux documentary? We need to. See, you guys only know how insufferable I am

during a cowboy season where we have the Mavericks and we have Luca. You don't. Right, when you have other stuff to distract you. You don't know how bad this is going to be this fall. DJ Moore, 28. David Justice, 59. Mike Mayock, 67.

Bad GM. Cracker, right? Isn't that what Antonio Brown called him? Anderson Silva, 50. Fighter. Was he Cracker of the Day or whatever though? No, but that's like- Cracker of the Week? That might have been like the early,

the first iteration of that. It was when Antonio Brown was with the Raiders, Mayock was GM. Oh, he used to play in that. I called him a cracker. Probably because he was mad that he froze his feet. Then he tried to play in that fake helmet. God, that was fun.

Where was I? Brad Garrett is 65. Everybody loves Raymond. Yeah. Robert Carlyle, 64. Actor. He was in Trainspotting. John Bell is 63. Corby from Widespread Panic. Never got it.

Anthony Michael Hall 57. 80s man. AMH. 80s man. Brat Pack. Breakfast Club, right? Breakfast whatever. Is that what it's called? Mm-hmm. Anyway. Sarah Michelle Geller, 48. And Rob McElheny, 48. And Cruel Intentions. Lot of good beats there. Born on the Stay Now Dead, Michelle McNamara. She was the author of I'll Be Gone in the Dark. I don't know that one.

You do, if you looked up Michelle McNamara. She, that was the story of the, is it the Golden State Killer? Oh, Patton Oswald? Yes, she was married to Patton Oswald. Wow, yeah, that's a... I read it. I don't read it, but I watched The Doc.

Marvin Miller, born on this day now dead, hero. Bless her up. And Pete Rose. Dead on this day, still dead. Wait. Oh no, Trump doesn't control the Hall of Fame. Didn't, when he died, didn't Trump say something like he should be in the Hall of Fame?

Yeah. Yeah, he went off about it. That'll be coming back. Pete Rose. It may be. And died on this day still dead is Bernie Madoff. And that was Today in History. It is time for closing remarks. Frankl and Frankl and understanding of the law and its power.

214 or 817. All threes. That's right, Frankl and Frankl will be sponsoring today's closing remarks. They are personal injury attorneys. This guy was telling me he rides a motorcycle around. Ooh, seems dangerous. Very dangerous. You're up high enough, you can see inside

where people are sitting, and just the amount of people texting while driving is crazy. But it's very liberating when you come to terms with the fact that you're probably gonna get killed by a 17 year old girl. But let's say that you don't get killed, and you're just injured. I have a phone number for you.

It's 214-817, doesn't matter. And then just all threes. It's very easy to remember. That's the Frankles. It's not4-817, doesn't matter. And then just all threes. It's very easy to remember. That's the Frankles. It's a half, you forget it. They seem reputable. They are. They are.

They've helped out thousands of people in DFW. Try it, on your way home. They are located in DFW as well. I dare you. When you call that number, you're gonna get a partner on the line. Not some spare. Nope, not some idiot.

Yeah, they're wonderful. They're feared by the insurance companies. They're chosen by the line. Not some spare. Nope, not some idiot. Yeah, they're wonderful. They're feared by the insurance companies. They're chosen by the people. They are personal injury lawyers. Frankl and Frankl. Thank you Frankl and Frankl for your continued support of Austin stuff. All right, so we can promote Vinny again, of course. Do you have closing remarks today? Now you're all bundled up, a little chilly in here, huh? A little cold. I have just a small bone to pick with Jake.

Oh, fuck. So about a month ago, I got a notification that one of my all-time favorite bands was going on tour. Three dates dates Dallas was one of them. I'm pumped I Contact baby mama get childcare taken care of I tell hi I'm going to the show. I want to go by myself. This is the day. This is how much I'm gonna pay for it Who's the band? It's brand new. He's like well, I just heard Jake on the dumb zone,

so you really feel good about giving your money to a pedophile? Oh. Guess he stayed home that night. No, he guilted you out of it? Now you're putting it on me, this is bullshit. You're only doing this because you know I went. I know, and I had to listen to your review of it.

This, aw. It was so sad. Dude, and I got hit up this weekend too. Somebody hit me up and was like, man, my boyfriend, same situation. And somebody was like, well, you both should be appalled. He's a pedophile. I'm like, I don't know.

I mean, I already went. We already moved the flags. Like, I don't know. I don't know. I mean, I already went, we already moved the flags, like, I don't know. I don't know, this is, you are not blameless here because you could have kept this to yourself. Now, I feel bad. But if he would have heard about it from you, then he wouldn't have known that.

Damn. Yeah. That's a good point. It did come back on Ty because she ended up staying home that night. Ah, you screwed yourself. Yeah. Is it when I stay home? What do you know about the fairy smut?

Nothing. I don't. Nothing? I know about the books that Blake reads, not about the fairy books. Wait a second, though. Yeah. You were going to go by yourself.

Yeah. And you decided, my husband can't watch my kid. No. I will not have that. I must contact her other mother. She was supposed to go to her anyway. It just needed to be earlier for me to go to the show, but Ty was going to have to take her.

So I just needed him to do that. But then he, oh, you want to give me money? I mean, if you can't keep each other in the balls, it doesn't use to be in marriage. The weird thing is, is in some of these new allegations, and I'm not making a value judgment here, I'm simply going to present some more facts, and I'm not making a value judgment here, I'm simply gonna present some more facts, and I want you guys to tell me what you think about it.

In the event, I would never participate in this, and I, in the event that the parents of like a 15-year-old girl are okay with that person dating a 25-year-old man, and they're aware of it, does it change the pedo scale at all? Are we in Georgia? Where are we?

Midwest, wasn't it? But I don't think that's relevant here. But the parent's consent is. I'm asking you, does that change how creepy I feel bad? A famous 25 year old. Yeah, yeah, yeah, go ahead, have my daughter. I would not do that. Work for Robert Plann, Led Zeppelin back. It's probably worked a lot Well, we've talked about like Belichick dating one of my daughters. Mm-hmm. You know what while we're here, unfortunately, they're too old

We didn't have time for but we're already late play it because I was all hoppin bad about this this morning What so there's a video? My bad, I should have told you that. It's just a viral video. But this is video from UNC football spring practice. God, look at those heels. And his girlfriend, this Jordan woman, who is, she's on the practice field walking back and forth. At some point she has a walkie talkie. She's just at spring practice. What? It's 10, 15, 10 yards away from the greatest coach of all time who I've had to listen to nonstop talk to me about the team, the team, the team.

It's not about the individual. We can't have distractions. And I've got this broad out here on the field dressed like Chapel Hill Cruella DeVille. Now, I was just like, how is she just being let alone to do this? Like I was going to- All of it's fake. I was going to criticize Rory McElroy for having his wife and kid there and kissing her on the way to the playoff

and all this kind of stuff, because I don't think that you should have, like that was me yesterday. Yeah. But I think my mind has been changed a little bit. Sure. Cause obviously you can have great success and bring your wife or girlfriend to work.

Did we hit her a job as social media person? Yeah, she's involved heavily. She runs the UNC football program to the point where she's on the field. That's great. That's insane. That is great. All right.

I won't give any more money to pedophiles. And I guess if I do, we'll do it together. So, okay. That makes sense. It's like you said earlier, Trump's back. I think pedophilia is back too. I think that's too. Sure.

Is that closing remarks for Ty and Kara or you got something Ty? I just wanted to bring up, I like when y'all do the, when y'all talk about things that are not real in movies or TV, like the fire, like the fire that's always going. Movie fire. That kind of shit bothers me. Movie torch.

Movie torch. Help, make a torch. Yeah. I'll give you like four hours. 500 bucks, yeah. To make a torch that you can walk around with. No way. Right. I've got a couple of- you don't wear your shirt wrap it around a stick and be like alright. Here's a torch

Yeah, that stays lit forever. Yeah burns for five hours. Yeah Mine's the load the jizz Jake's jizz Where does it go? Yeah, what happens? Oh never any clean when there is sex then they just kind of lay there very tidy process I've got a couple to add to the list. Okay. That drive me insane. No one ever locks their door when they get home and close it.

Apartment, house, and a movie, TV. And we're like, I got three or four locks. Yeah. Even in a horror movie sometimes. They're running from something. Run in, close the door, don't lock it. Yeah. Also, the beds are way too small. All-

That's a great point. You see a couple in a movie or two, they're all in like a double bed. Even if they're in a huge house. Interesting. Riches can be tiny bed. I remember seeing when Kevin was on his parents' bed in Home Alone and seeing that bed as an adult

and I'm like, my bed is bigger than that. Yeah. It was like his palace, you know, I'm like when Kevin was on his parents' bed and home alone and seeing that bed as an adult and I'm like, my bed is bigger than that. Yeah. It was like his palace, you know, I'm like, ah. That's a good one. Way too small for two adults. Last one is the people that can just, they drink beer and eat pizza all day long and still have abs.

Yeah, that's a weird bid that Hollywood, I mean, I guess it makes sense because they have to sell all of that shit. Yeah. But that drives me nuts. Do you know what I think as an alcoholic, as I'm watching, I'm like, you can't really do that. It's not actually gonna work.

Well that goes to Independence Day, Judd Hirsch, who has wasted the whole film and then all of a sudden he's like real coherent. Like there's no sleeping it off type thing. And then- Coffee, coffee. This weekend I was watching, I'm at the White Lotus, the episode after when he jerked off his brother,

but that's when you- The hangover episode. Yeah. And just they're kind of showing how they took some kind of a drug early in the evening. And I guess it was ecstasy because then they got silly. But then during that eight hour trip, like during that, the girls kind of got together

and were having a real coherent conversation. And then all of a sudden they're wild again, screaming, but then they're this and then they're, yeah. Not real real. It's just the, in the middle of the eight hour binge of drinking and drugs, like all of a sudden, we're gonna have a real well thought out conversation here. Or simply how they portray drinking and drugs sometimes

as well, just the whole, woo, we're all just gonna scream and yell. Cause I've been drinking for an hour or so, woo, woo. No, it's much more likely that I'm just gonna watch, yeah, you know, like videos, like Iraq War Fails with my buddies, like an hour and a half in the middle. Or just start dancing in the middle of a... Yeah, probably not.

Yeah, probably not. I got one for you. We were watching Kindergarten Cop, and the very first scene, the bad guy, Crisp, he comes in and he sees an enemy, and he shoots him, and he has a silencer on his gun and he kills him and the guy dies silently. Yep, that's the meaning of a silencer, right there.

Happens all the time. You get killed with a silencer, you're still gonna be, ah! You're not just gonna be like, ah, I don't wanna play your cover. So Addison and Prog. We do have one gift. Oh, for sure.

Because I forgot to bring this to you last time. We already gave you all yours. This is for Jake. Oh, OK. Right on. This is when you think Jake. Was Jake not there? No, I just forgot.

One of our visits? Oh, OK. You got to have this for the show. Oh, yeah. Look at that, folks. We got the starting lineup. Michael Irvin got the figurine, got the car. Dude, I might've had, actually, I'm almost positive

I did have this. Did they only make those for Kemp Spin Athletes or is that just the one people sent you? Because somebody sent me a Mel Hall years ago. Yeah, probably. Probably, well thank you guys. Yeah. That's very cool. Would you like to put anything, promote anything?

Next Thursday, Addison Improv. Next Thursday, Addison Improv. You can go to the website for tickets. You can hit me up on Instagram, at Vinnie and the Jokes. We also do a Cowabungaa shows cowabunga comedy last Wednesdays at the Fillmore Pub in downtown Plano right there off K and 15th and those show we basically turned the Fillmore Pub into a comedy club last Wednesdays we got great comics that come out and it's a free show and a recommendation I did this past week

was I thought I was going deaf. I went to one of these Minute Clinics at CVS and I got the earwax blasted out of my ears. One of the best feelings I've ever had. So if you guys- They'll do it at a CVS? At a CVS, it's like a little Minute Clinic. You scrape it in, they go flush it out.

Do you not Q-tip your ears on a regular basis? They say that's bad for you. Yeah, they do. So you don't? Ever since then, I don't, I mean, but I used to. Okay, cause I still do it despite them saying that it's bad for you. It feels like they're like,

oh, you're not supposed to do it too much. Because I've also heard like. I don't know how much. Yeah. But I have heard that whether you do it or not, going to some sort of ear, nose, and throat or something like that and just having him blast it is very good.

I'm like walking around in IMAX now. It's unreal. I got a picture of it too. It's disgusting if you guys want to see. You feel like you got fingered kind of? Just like, what is it? Yeah, yeah, a little. You know what I mean.

I guess it's like coming out. Yeah, he goes like this. Yeah. Yep. But yeah, that's like this. Yep. But yeah, that's the improv. See you guys. Gotta go before this becomes a zoo. Thank you for watching my video.

Subscribe and type for my name if you want to watch more of my videos. He knows how to handle every baseball call. Jared Sandler on the Tom's Zone, y'all. J-A-R-E-D social S-A-N-D-L-E-R, so hot. Lying in the home base on the Tom's Zone show, Jared Sandler's letting them know it's the Jared Sandler Show, he got baseball toe! ["Walking in the Night"] Oh, yeah!