The Dumb Zone FREE - The Dumb Zone 2-29-24

Episode Date: February 29, 2024

Live show from The Texan in Athens. We talk to the newest staff writer at The Dallas Morning News, Sarah Hepola, and a helicopter crash survivor, Troy Wolfe. We also have to educate Jake on how paternity tests are administered.(00:00) - Open (22:20) - Sarah Hepola (40:58) - Viewer Mail (50:34) - Stephen speaks at the combine (01:20:40) - Survivor of a helicopter crash, Troy Wolfe (01:45:28) - News (02:06:16) - Today in History ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Hello, I'm Dan McDowell, longtime professional broadcaster. Why subscribe to our Patreon podcast? Well, perhaps you support our struggle to get out from under the oppressive thumb of the man. Or, objectively, if you sign up at patreon.com slash the dumb zone, you'll get the two episodes per week that are available on all podcast platforms, like this one, plus an additional two episodes each week that are exclusive to Patreon. So subscribing on Patreon gets you four episodes per week. Oh my, what a bargain. Now, on to today's program.

Okay, and I mentioned this earlier, that people are on one side of the fence or the other oftentimes when it comes to dry rub or sauce. That was our question this morning. We've been asking you, and you guys have been responding, so I'm going to share a couple of them. The first one is from Cassandra. She says Texas gals like dry rub. Hmm, I don't know. All right, all right, all right, all right, all right.

What a debate. All right, all right, all right, all right, all right. I never listen. What a debate Indeed Call us Do you prefer dry or a wet rub? Is there a wet rub? I think it just means sauce. Oh. Okay.

Well, I must ask a true Texan about that, like you are. You got here as quick as you could, though. Yeah. It took quite some time. And I feel like we are truly in Texas today. Some days I don't. Like, where is this? Like, this feels Texas.

For sure. We are not high atop my garage. We are not. No. We are high atop a stage. Yes. An actual stage. Suds have been popped out there in the crowd.

Are we within 100 miles of the 9-11 memorial in Grapevine? Or are we even a little farther? I think we're further. I think it's pretty close, though. You did a little negoti and said we'll do it.

Yeah. Kelly and I hammered out our rate for coming out here. And this place is amazing. We are in Athens, Texas, folks. Athens, Texas. I've never been here before. To this place, which is called The Texan.

Actually, we're 95 miles. That's what I'm saying. I looked it up this morning and thought it's right there. Okay. Well, then maybe he wants a discount. Shouldn't have said that. You already signed. No, I've never been to like this town.

I feel like I have like a I mean, we got high school football guy over here, but I feel like I have way less way less East Texas experience than I do West Texas experience. The Athens Bulldogs? He clearly saw a water tower.

No. That was his team. Oh, okay. Athens, Ohio is the Bulldogs. I just wondered if that travels. The scummies. I don't know Athens. Rivals. What do we got? Hornets. Athens Hornets. That's not one

that the left can ever come for. No, no, I don't think so, but who knows? Murder Hornets in 2020, that was a troubling time. Yeah, the connotation there is death. Let's change that name. Let's take it away. Yeah.

Sometimes there's like an African connotation. When they do like Africanized bees or something like that, and you're like, whoa, what does that mean? Yeah, we don't like that out here. Are you taking to the city already? Out here in Athens, Texas. Yeah, no. I mean, I'll bet you your price per square foot is a lot better out here.

Let's get ourselves some land. You know what I was thinking? So Kelly and Camille are the proprietors. They own this place. Kelly's like, make sure you say Kelly first. Because Kelly also, dude, so don't get too excited, guys. If you're like, Kelly and Camille, I'm going to get right down there. No, no, no.

I mean, still, he's a fine-looking guy. But it's not what you were all thinking. Or at least what everybody up here on this particular stage is thinking. But I was thinking, first of all, they're like, oh, we owned, what's the barbecue place? I'm sorry. Smokey B. Smokey B's. Yeah.

And that's generally a catering thing now. And now this is different. And it's a venue where they will actually have shows and bands. I'm going to have my second wedding here. He said they have comedy, and to prove it, they booked the Dumb Zone podcast. Well, I got bad news for you. But it's wonderful. It's beautiful, this venue.

It has to be the nicest place in athens texas and i was thinking how come everybody else is so much better at business than us like they can build this thing and they know business and they own one this has been here for like a hundred plus years yeah but they had to buy it and expand it and and i'm sure it didn't look like this when they bought it it's all cobwebby and right broken down they you know they've uh they brought this into the 20th century 21st century what century are we in the 21st just don't even tell 21st century okay yeah just don't even tell them it's great being here in the 21st century in ath. At the Texan in Athens. But I was also thinking,

what a venue. How easy could it be to kind of just, well, let's put our studio space right there. There's nothing but studio space here. We could build out a studio. We'll do the potty. We could emcee some weddings. Yeah.

You got the jail across the street You can revive your Your musical career Yeah I mean I've been waiting too What was your band name? You could get the future Janitors of America back together That was not the name of the band Give me one

Oh that was the jackass band Bad Habit Okay We had Five Minute Stranger which was a loose rape reference uh we had uh a time for nothing i was thinking that was the left hand but go ahead after you sit on i don't know if maybe not the r word but more of like a hookup you know but yeah it was pretty much all the same people we would just have to rotate out a member every couple years. Well, what was the future

Janitors of America? That was really more of just like, you know how Dan's dad played racquetball at like a club? Yeah. It was kind of like that.

And had the nude sauna? Yeah. It was just a, it was a men's club for 14 to 17 year olds. That's pretty much it. We were at egg houses. Well, it's much too big of a venue for my liking.

For us, yeah. Only that I don't think we're going to fill this up. No, I think that that has left the barn. The great news is that this is not live. It's live to tape. But we're inviting you out here after you listen to this. You should stop by this place in Athens, Texas texas yes back go to their website the texan what's the uh website what's the url no you don't have to do that the texan athens.com you see music here get married here get married a

second time here whatever you want to do. I did want to tell you guys a brief story about parenting this morning. So my wife had to go to a funeral this morning. So she left super, super early. Without you? Yeah. I mean, what was I going to do, miss the Texan? No.

No. So she had to fly to New Orleans, and I had the girl. So a family member? Grandmother. Okay. That's always interesting to me. Where's the line? What funeral?

Who? How close? I mean, if it were local, I might have. Like my wife has an aunt that she would say I have to go. Right. To Cleveland for. What's the cousin's name? Oh, Cousin Tommy.

Cousin Tommy. They were at a dinner last night. By the way, so they get back. Or she gets back. At like 10.30. On and going. I would never. And then she's like, oh, it was great.

I got to catch it. And then she proceeds to tell me about, oh, it was great. I got to catch it. And then she proceeds to tell me about, oh, his daughter does this and his son does, and you know. I don't care at all. Yeah.

That's why I didn't go. Yeah. Because I don't care about this stuff. Don't now relive it. All right, sorry. Your night. No, you're fine.

It's the morning. Oh. So on Thursdays, we take my daughter to something called occupational therapy. It's basically where they teach her how to hold a pencil. And, you know, it's really cool.

We do a lot of that at Montessori. Is she Montessori school too? Mm-hmm. Okay. Yeah. Do a lot of dexterity stuff. Yeah, we do this once a week. And she's, like, becoming more familiar of what she has on what day of the week.

And so this morning, she came and got in bed with me. It was like six 30 and she was like, what do I got today? And I go, well, you got, we call it, like I said, we call it gym school. It's OT, right? It's 45 minutes. She has to go back there and do like balancing exercises and learn to write basically. She goes, what's after gym school? I go, well, then you got regular school. So you're her personal write, basically. She goes, what's after gym school? I go, well, then you got regular school. So you're her personal assistant, basically. Just reading her schedule.

What do I have after regular school? I go, well, you know, today you have cheer camp, which is something that we're doing here in the spring. It's like an hour. It's basically just gymnastics. And she goes, it's a long day. I was like, yeah, I was like, that is actually a pretty long day. And she was like, I hate long days. She's like, are they always like this? And I honestly just like receded into my mind of being like, you have no idea yeah like you have you think this is bad you have 70 years of this left yeah she goes i hate long days i'm like well she's wise she's

already wise pretty much just how it's gonna be yeah like forever she's like what time will i be done and i'm like i mean who can say yeah it'll be it'll be dark i can tell you that it'll be night time before you get to relax i can promise you that and yeah she just it's kind of like washed over her that she's like this is just life she asked you if she could vape no she didn't have to ask i handed to her yeah yeah take the edge off yeah exactly pop his in yeah three yeah three three millies not sixes you try to wait as long as you can in the day and then you just need it what the the vape yeah i don't know if you're a i'm gonna do that reach over to the nightstand when i wake up yeah you do you do that's what you do yeah okay because i thought you were going to

say you want to wait as long as you can to inform your kids that they're pretty much not going to like day-to-day life ever. Yeah, that's unfortunate that she's already there. Dude, think about whenever you were a kid and you would go to, like, football practice at, like, 6.30 in the morning or 6 o'clock in the morning. You leave your house at 5.40. You're at school until 4. you get home, you have chores, like you're basically working like a 12- And you're going to find this out. You're going to be mad at how much homework they give. Oh, my gosh.

Like, wait, they were there for seven hours today, and now you're giving them another two hours? Yeah. What was going on? Like, you're putting this all on me, and now the thing is because then I have to go through it. I don't know. Yeah.

I don't know algebra. I can't remember. Yeah. You don't even know where Portugal is. I really don't. So, yeah. That was just a crushing moment where I had to tell her, hey, it's going to suck for a long time. And then the other thing that happened to me last night was I went to a historic land board meeting thing. Generic.

I don't even know what it was actually called. It didn't feel like city council. So you live on historic land? Yeah. All that near Grapevine, Main Street. Yeah. Anything around there is deemed like we need extra board meeting if you want to do any construction. Yeah, and some houses are different than others.

Some are like you just can't touch it. Is yours a century home? No. Okay. But I did have to go there, and there's like eight people on the panel. Because you're trying to get renovations to build an office. Pretty much, yeah. Expand the house to get renovations to build an office. Pretty much, yeah. Expand the house a little bit and get myself an office.

And there's like eight people up there. And then I have been like completely detached. Do they have powdered wigs and stuff? No, they were not dressed as British, you know, court members from 300 years ago. Justices, I suppose. But we got there and the guy was like, I'd never met this guy before. My wife has handled this completely.

And he's like, hey, you know, I'm going to, you know, kind of sell your case. But if you want to say something, it wouldn't hurt. And I was like, damn, it's my time. So he's up there, you know, guy in a suit. We got audio? No. I think that might actually be illegal. We don't care.

Yeah. So he puts like our plans up on the board on like two TV screens up there. And they're like all passing around documents. And then he was like, and if the parties would like to say anything over here. And I'm like, yeah, I got this. So your fate depends on these eight individuals and if they kind of don't like your vibe, the cut of your jib. I don't really know that I actually had to do this.

Okay. But I feel like post last summer with court. Yeah. Now I'm kind of like, I got this. Okay. Now you didn't have the experience last year. Yeah. Now you've been through it. Yeah. Now I'm kind of like, I got this. Okay, now you didn't have the experience last year. Yeah.

Now you've been through it. Yeah, so like- Like I've been through way worse than this. Exactly. So we both walked up there- Which is why I want to date a POW.

Do you want to expound on that? Well, any of my- I know I'm a difficult person and anything though that she will have to deal with- Like going to dinner with her cousin. Yeah, she will always say I've dealt with way worse than this.

I was electrocuted. I was whatever. I was waterboarded. Yeah. And this guy is just being lazy and whatever. He just makes my kids wait until noon to open presents. Yeah, yeah. Everything's great with him.

Yeah. Do you remember the time that I feel like the greatest hypothetical we ever had was used to be 500 pounds or used to be homeless? I love that one. Thank you. That wasn't original. That was me. Do you remember where we were whenever we came up or you came up with that? Yeah, we were in the land of the homeless.

We were absolutely in the land of the homeless. In California. Yeah. When we go out there for training camp. It confirms what I thought when I was a kid. Because I grew up in Cleveland. If you're homeless. And I thought, why do you live here? Just move west.

I just thought, just start walking that way. Get a compass. Are the people loving this? Or is this a little, yeah. Okay, one way. Get a compass. Are the people loving this? Or is this a little, yeah. Okay, one guy. Hey, the fact that there are people, that's a big win for us. Yeah, yeah. All Kelly's family members are here.

Right, pretty much. No, I was just always thinking, I'm six years old, eight years old. If I was that, in that position, I would just start walking west. You got all the time in the world. There's whatever. Calendar's free. Yeah, and then you eventually will have to stop because there'll be water. You can't walk anymore.

And then you'll be in California. It'll be really warm. You go to sleep on the beach. You're not going to sleep in the doorway of an office building downtown. Anyway, where were we? Yeah, so I got up there. Oh, you're at court. I killed it.

What do you think I did? Were you eloquent? I think so. Did you state your case? Yeah, I just told them I was like, I don't want to move. I want to live here. But I also... Oh, did you give them a little BS about loving grapevine? Yeah, but I actually do like it there. This is want to move. I want to live here. But I also... Oh, did you give him a little BS about loving Grapevine?

Yeah, but I actually do like it there. This is important to me. I didn't bring up the Christian cell phone company. I was going to say. Did you leave with that? I could go spend my money in another city. That's kind of how I said it. I'm trying to make Grapevine great again.

Yeah, exactly. That's exactly what I did. I maggot him. I was like, yeah, I want to live here. I just don't want to be next to the bowling chain. Yeah, and you kind of just jerk your head that way. You get it. And they all did.

Wink at the bros. Like, come on, man. They're like, oh, give this guy an addition. Did they actually vote right then? Yeah. Like while you were, like, we don't need to hear anyone. They stand up and they're all cheering and yelling. It's not that far off.

Like there's a gavel. Oh, really? Yeah. That's awesome. Everybody's playing dress up. Oh, my gosh. It's such dress up. Like, yeah, they actually were like, I don't think we need to hear anymore.

That's awesome, man. What was the vote? Oh, unanimous. Really? Yeah. good for you did they yell hip hip and then something oh yeah and they carry out and yes they what color gatorade was the uh the dump that's awesome it was really weird man so you're it's happening i mean it's at least you know crossed that threshold okay there's a of, are there palms to be greased? There might have to be a couple palms to be greased, yeah. We might have to dip into the old business account.

Somebody might have to wet the beak a little bit. Yeah. But it looks like it's happening. But yeah, like I felt like. Was William D. Tate there? No, but his spot was. Like a bigger throne. It's in the middle.

Yeah. Yeah, it's at the middle and it's at the top and it was just like i'm like man where's where's where's billy d yeah it was not there but and i feel like there was a couple dudes that might have been listeners that were kind of looking at me like what are you doing here like we know you're a moron you're destroying yeah you're doing. I felt like Will Ferrell in old school. Like the James Carville

speech where he just got up there and all of a sudden he thought he was the biggest dope. We walked out and Kristen was like where did that come from?

I was like I don't know. The Will Ferrell like I don't know. I don't know. I have no idea what just happened. That's excellent, man. It was weird, but it was an experience for sure.

Anyways. Well, I can't wait. Will you show us the plans? I mean, in what world would you be able to look at them and make sense of them? I don't know. You could explain it. Are you putting a little secret room? If you're making- A secret room? them. I don't know. You could explain it. Are you putting a little secret room? If you're making

a secret room? What am I? The guy from Cleveland? Yeah, like you pull out a book and then the bookshelf turns and now you can go back in there. There's no secret room. Michael Jackson room. You don't have to use it for the same thing, just for fun.

Just for fun, no. Just for not being around everyone. Is it going to be as big as the den? Your office? Close. Okay. Close. Have to do, maybe transfer some watching parties over there.

Yeah. All good, as long as Blake can deal with the cat. Just flame up. I just want a place where I can hang out with that cat. That's what it's all about? Mm-hmm. By the way, a potential guest of ours says, still struggling today, tomorrow way better.

But we are... Okay, we'll get him next week. Yeah. Oh, actually, we do have a... You know what? You want to work on just calling her right now? We'll just pop her right up? Yeah.

Okay, because we want to talk to Sarah Heffler. But I did want to promote the greatness of Michael Copeland. Yes, Michael. And he is videoing today. If you are watching us on YouTube already, you're like, yeah, I know. And I walked in here today, Michael Copeland. Michael Copeland Productions or just Copeland Productions? CopelandProductions.com.

Copeland. That's where I live. I said to him, I go, hey, because his videos look so good. And I can't believe that he goes to this trouble. We know Michael Copeland. We don't know if he's really into... to this trouble. We know Michael Copeland.

We don't know if he's really into... I don't know where he stands on life or abortion. Whoa. But I know where he stands on Bono. Pro? Yes, he is pro. And so... With that...

It's not pro-abortion. With being pro-Bono, he'll do all this amazing work. And I said, hey, I mean, I don't go back and watch the videos too much. I just kind of skim by them. But, I mean, I live it. And I said, do you put your website up there? Do you put your logo on there? He's like, oh, no.

Would I be allowed to do that? I'm like, of course. You can do anything you want. Yeah, put a scroll with your name and number and if you're looking to hook up or something, looking for a little strange, just put your burner phone on there, whatever you want.

Yeah, binder. It's your video, really. You're at, you're Graham, you're whatever. I don't know. You sound super hip right now. Do I? Mm-hmm. Thanks, man.

Yeah. You want to call her? I thought you were going to be calling her while I was talking. He was kind of just vamping for you. I'm killing time. We're calling the great Sarah Heppola, who is starting a new job. This is Sarah. Wait, hold on.

I'm still dialing, Sarah. Hold on. Okay, now it's ringing. Okay, now do that again. This is Sarah. Oh, Sarah Heppola. Yeah, Sarah. We all know Sarah Heppela. Yeah, Sarah. We all know Sarah Heppela. Maybe you don't.

Sarah Heppela, who went from being a dirty blackout drunk to New York Times. You're so mean about that. What? To New York Times. You forgot the word sexy. Dirty sexy. Well, that implies, yeah. I mean, blackout drunk, to me, that is synonymous with sexy.

There's so much wrong with you. Keep going. We have a better chance. Anyway, you know it's true, Sarah. I read the book. I'm hanging up. No, don't hang up. Not yet.

We want to promote your new bit. Actually, Sarah is now a... Well, why don't you tell us what you're doing for the Dallas Morning News? Oh, yeah. I'm a new featured staff writer at the Dallas Morning News. Our Dallas Morning News. Wow. I know. Sarah has Morning News. Wow. I know.

Sarah has a podcast too. It's called Smoke Them If You Got Them. It's on substack.com or like I did the other day, I've been meaning to subscribe. You can just go to the whatever your favorite podcast thing is like Apple and kind of click one click there. It's really

easy, Jake, to subscribe to a podcast off Substack if you just go to any of your favorite podcast download thingies. So what are you going to be doing there? What does that mean? Well, I'm covering, like, I think the job description is something that's like covering Dallas's big personalities lively scenes and the things that get people talking like Blake does any yeah Blake is probably like number one it's actually three on my list uh any other suggestions that you guys have?

Um, what's the guy's name that like bought off Clarence Thomas? Oh, Harlan, Harlan Crowe's on my list. That's a pretty good one. Harlan Crowe is a big fish if you can catch him. So how does this come about? Like, do you have to go to a job interview? I just don't see you really doing that. I know.

Yeah, you're a rebel. It's true. I don't know how long I'm going to last, you guys. I might be fired later today. Us either. It's like, what happened, to be frank, is that I was broke. I mean, the freelance life is like really hard. And I know that I look like I'm living large based on the amount of tacos I eat and, you know, the cats on Instagram, but it's a hard life. And, you know, sub stack doesn't always pay the big money like you guys get. Anyway, I reached out.

Here's the other thing. I spent a lot of my career wanting to kind of like write for the massive, like write for New York Times, write for the big publications. And after years of that, you realize it is such a giant pain in the ass. And I kind of wanted to write about the place where I live. You know, it's kind of a novel concept. It's actually one of the things that made me fall in love with the ticket, to the extent that I fell in love with the ticket,

was that I felt that you guys, back in the day, I mean you, but also your brothers, you know, were talking about the place where we lived and having a water cooler conversation for an era that kind of was post water cooler for a lot of us. That's awesome, man. Yeah, thanks. Well, no, we're very excited for you. And so much so that we weren't going to do this before. But now that you're there, we've been talking, as you know, discussing maybe we could do something a little more regular with you here in the future, like in this forum.

Now that you're really, really famous. Before, we were like, I don't know. Now that you're not just some vagabond. Yeah. Well, I am still a vagabond. I'm just kind of an upscale vagabond. Do you have to go to the office every day? Oh, my God, Jake.

Oh, my God. I have to go three times a week. That's not horrible. No, it's not horrible, but... Compared to zero, though. By the way, it's a really nice office. It's in a Statler building. Okay.

And that's like 10 minutes away from my house. So it really a Statler building. Okay. That's like 10 minutes away from my house. It really just couldn't be more convenient, but you would think I am slogging to outer space the way that I treat this. I am just like, oh my god, I've got to go in. I haven't even been in today because I've been hustling.

I'm on my way to an interview at 1 o'clock. I'm actually driving as I'm talking to you guys I was on Central Expressway just a moment ago by the way if I had died on Central Expressway would that have like made your podcast more famous do you think we definitely would have paywalled it like if this is a free one we would have we 100% would have would have capitalized it. Hey, do you think Jerry's that lady's dad? Oh, 100%. 100%, Jake.

Why are you even asking that? I don't know. I'm just very interested in the Maury type situation that Cowboys Media could produce. Not only is Jerry her dad, but if this goes the way i want it to this will start a rolling thunder that leads to more paternity cases on him he has more than one child we have we just know that that's got to be true. Kind of like the Tiger Woods situation. I've just lost all access to the Cowboys, by the way. You what about the Cowboys? I said I've just lost all access to the Cowboys.

Oh, that you used to have, yeah. I forgot, yeah, the other podcast. You want to pimp that, or do you not care about that one anymore? Oh, the America's Girls podcast is an eight-part docuseries on the history and cultural impact of the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders. It's a great little, you know, you can do it in an afternoon on a drive.

And it's about the 50 years of, you know, sort of like the origin story of sexy sideline dancers in the NFL and how Dallas started it all. And I love that little podcast. They never gave me access anyway, so I don't know why I'm upset about losing it. You know, they never returned my calls back then. Oh, I didn't realize that. I thought they were proper. No, I reached out to cheerleaders individually, like through their Instagram accounts and, you know, Facebook and stuff like that

and and worked those channels but no the actual Cowboys media never got back to me they have a new press guy at least they did when I by the time I was done with the podcast because remember Rich Dalrymple sorry I just remembered that. After the podcast came out, their press guy got caught. You know, the scandal of his recording the cheerleaders in the dressing room was exposed, quote unquote. And he got, you know, kicked out. And so they got a new press person that was like way, way better and finally called me. But the project was done at that point. He's never taken any photos of anybody.

Right. I'm sure that the second guy that came into that role was like, I'm going to fix me. There's one thing I can't do. Yeah, exactly. Like, just take that one off my to-do list. But the Jerry thing, y'all, I'm so excited that that judge

ruled for that paternity test to go through. It is a Maury situation. We're going to have a Dallas-based Maury you-are-the-father situation, and I am here for it. There's not a lot of things that I feel like total like glee about, and this one I do.

Because I really believe this young woman who I've heard is actually, you know, not a money grubber. She really just would like to say who her father is. I'm sure there's alternative, I'm sure there's ulterior motives, I have no doubt. But there's also just, I think any one of us would like to be able to just not have to lie in public about who our father is. I don't know. You don't really want to open this can of worms.

Dan doesn't really know who his dad is. Is it Jerry Jones? I think he's always kind of had the position that he would rather uh be fairly well compensated and not have a relationship with his dad as opposed to not compensated at all and not have a relationship with his dad so like i don't have sympathy for her at all because really yeah i be oh i never knew. Okay, get in line behind millions of others, including me. And yes, she did.

They had a steady income. She got a Range Rover on her 16th birthday. You know what I got? A 1978 Pinto. A 1978 Ford Pinto that did not go in reverse and that means you had to park you had to look forever to find a place where you could get out of there

yeah oh that's why you're back in guy now you're just showing off now you finally have the luxury of being able to reverse yeah maybe that's it and the camera and all that but the point is the point is oh I just had this empty hole in my heart.

Well, sack up. She's a girl. Toughen up, Buttercup. That's what you would yell at a girl, right? All right. Two points, Dan. One, my new nickname for you is Buttercup. Two, I think you are the poster child for why people

should have their own fathers. Okay. Three, because I just added one, she couldn't consent to this. All of this stuff that you're talking about her getting the Range Rover and the party and all that, all of that happened before she could ever consent to it. It's not right. And her mother made that deal. She didn't. Well, let me say this. I'm just jealous. I am.

That's what I want. Why couldn't my mom have slept with Jerry Jones and not... Or at least like Art Modell. Yeah, someone. Someone, Drew Carey. Just somebody in Cleveland that's well-known. Well, I guess Cincinnati is Jerry Springer, right? I completely understand that, Dan, and I think it's totally reasonable. And, you know, my mother is a therapist,

and so one of the roles I intend to play here is to pop out, you know, Freudian theories about each of you, like a little pimple on your back. So I feel like we just got one from Dan, and I feel proud. All right. Well, good step one. And congrats on the job. I know you got that job, or not a job interview. You just have a meeting? Is this part of the corporate, you know, world that you're in now i i did go in for a meeting you know like i emailed the editor

and then i was like hey do y'all have a job and he was like oh i think that we might have something and then it's like four months passed and then he was like oh come in and meet some people and i was like okay and um i just i'm a mess like i cuss in the meetings. I'm like always chewing nicotine gum. It's just like, I just feel like a feral cat and I'm having to be domesticated and it's like, oh my God, I have to wear shoes inside. But I'm going to do it. It's going to be okay.

And I think it's going to be great. I'm so excited about writing about Dallas. I'm going to write about Jerry Jones. I'm going to write about this woman, Alexandra Davis, I think is her name, and then Dan's going to fall in love with her and realize how wrong he was to badmouth her. And I'll meet her, and we'll be like, oh, we have so much in common. How about coffee?

Yeah, we should have some coffee and kind of talk this over. I got this stack of bills over here, Alexandra, and maybe you can help me out on this. All right, Sarah. I'll give you a DNA sample. Know what I mean, Sarah? Jesus, Pete. I mean, I'm trying to roll with everything,

but that one right there is just. You know what I was going to say? I wonder, just because Trump had this huge judgment against him and his $400 million, it feels like he can always just go, well, no, I'm just not going to do it. Yeah. Will Jerry ever actually submit to this test, or can he somehow appeal? Yeah, just like, I don't think, I have my doubts on whether we're actually ever going to know. He's going to die before it happens.

He'd rather die than do this. Here's the thing I don't understand. Genuinely, I don't. Why? His wife has got to know. Yeah. His family's got to know. What's the holdup exactly?

Like, especially if he's already paying the money. You know, like, what is the financial disincentive to doing it if you already have a it if you're already you already have a trust you're already paying this person you know annually then just admit it it's an interesting though public knowledge it's easy to hide it under the table yeah but everybody already knows though everybody knows it's a dirt bag yeah like this but it is an interesting precedent for the future though just based yes, the mom made this financial agreement. That baby did not.

Yeah. So that's... And to her point, maybe he just doesn't want, like, man, if I open the floodgate. Yeah. Yeah. If I make my DNA public. Yeah. I think he doesn't want precedent in his own life

because if this happens and she wins more people will come so he's holding a finger in the dam so to speak alright well go get your we're making you late for your first meeting

or whatever you guys I'm so excited to be doing this with you all. I do mostly love you both. All right. All right. We'll see you. Okay, bye. There's the great Sarah Heppela.

You can read her in the Dallas Morning News. Also on her podcast she was talking about this week, they have an intern, Blake. Who? I don't know who it is. I'm just saying. They have an intern. What are we doing here? We can't even hire a video guy.

I didn't say hire. I think our bono limit has reached its capacity. Let's keep trying. Yeah. I mean, geez. We'll take as much bono as we can get hey i haven't mentioned uh today is leap day is that exciting to you no oh um i think it's weird i think uh i can't remember who posted this last month but like i do think that there should be a more standardized

calendar where every single month has the same amount of days and uh every month starts on either a sunday or a monday yeah that's i've heard that i heard razor talking about that that might have been who it was and then it kind of caught fire on the ticket a little bit. It's just too easy. That does resurface every few years or so. Somebody brings this up. 13 months. Yeah. 28 days per month. But then there's one extra day.

So I don't like the first is always on Monday and the second is always on Tuesday. I think that one extra day should be the one that shifts everything one over every year. Because your birthday, you don't want it always on Wednesday. Occasionally, you want your birthday on Saturday. Does anybody really care about that? Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah, birthday falls on a weekend. That's a big deal. Don't you just have the party on the weekend? Don't you think? I'll bet your wife cares. Not the same. Although she does seem to have like a birthday quarter.

Yeah. Not even a month. It's like, okay, it's B1. Yeah, no, the leap year thing. But so, yeah, then New Year's Day is like the extra whatever. The only thing I ever really remembered about the leap year day was just Mike Reiner's daughter. It's the only thing I knew. I didn't know anybody who had that birthday or this birthday I suppose. You know what's really weird? So I'm getting today in history

ready this morning. So I'll go to baseballreference.com, pro football, you know, those to see what are the sports birthdays today. And usually there's 100 birthdays on there. For all the people who have ever played Major League Baseball, there's 100 people that on February 28th were born. And today it's like 10. Yeah, it makes sense. Sure.

Right? This is every four years thing. Are we still doing every four years? How often we do leave here? For now. I think they might actually be voting to expand. Yes. Thank you, Blake.

That was a college football joke that he liked. But people listening to us. Yeah. I got five birthdays. Wow. On February 29th. People that are born on February 29th love to tell you about it. That's a good point, actually.

Actually, the first one was for yesterday. Well, that doesn't at all count then. But this makes it six. This is Gabby Winters wants to wish happy birthday to Jeff Winters. He is 42 yesterday. Happy birthday, Jeff. That's right. We have Thursday, the 29th, is my 36th.

Let's see. You want to tell you how much I appreciate it? Okay. Let's see. You know, of course. He loves us. Just killing it. This guy loves us.

Yeah. He says, I'm sure like most listeners, there are small things I look forward to every episode. Right now, it is Jake's abrupt endings to news segments. And Blake's random mascots. He's from Sexy. Dude. That's a layup. Mustangs.

That's easy money, yeah. Mustangs? Yeah. That's not too far from him. That's a layup. Mustangs. That's easy money, yeah. Mustangs? Yeah. That's not too far from him. That's from Brad Whiteside. He says, attaches a news article from my birthday, so you don't step in a bear trap.

My brother Ricky passed away in 2016. The news article is, after his mom gave birth to him, the story was his brother had a leap day birthday as well. So four years earlier. I think that's an amazing, ironic note. I would agree. If your mom...

Also very sad. That he's not alive anymore. Yeah. Yeah, but that's not what this talk is about. This talk is about how cool it is. And he included it. He did. Like he wants us to know.

He did. So happy birthday to Ricky as well as... Let's see. Oh, Brad Whiteside. Mr. Liebman, my birthday, Thursday, February 29th. I only get one of these every four years. See, they love talking about it. Every time.

And one of these emails are going to say, you know, today's my 32nd birthday, but I'm really turning eight. I'm certain I'll be woken up in that special way, and I plan on using the Jack Abernathy wolf-catching technique your historian guest talked about last week. Good grief. My leaders are Blake, Video Man's background laugh, and FDR doing the Cotton-Eyed Joe at the 1943 State of the Union address. That's not exactly what he did. He just stood up, okay?

It was a powerful moment. It was a powerful moment in the movie Pearl Harbor. What if, though? The nation just rallies. Didn't they actually? He was the first one off the boat at Normandy, right? Yeah, no, he stormed the beach, yeah. Ran right up there.

Full speed. Grabbed the Luger out of Hitler's hand and said, I got him. Anyway, that's from Rick. Day two, DF, number 923. Uncle Hotmail, Leap Day birthday shout-out to Genevieve, my dot, dot, dot.

Well, I don't know what she is. You see, much like the hang zone and the ticket, we separated last year. So happy effing birthday, I guess, from Daniel. That means it was her call. Yeah. Are you still sending that in? Well, maybe also, like you say, if you even know someone with a February 29th birthday, you need to, like we all knew Jordan Reiner.

Yeah, but I wouldn't send her birthday in. But if she just left you and you're sad. Like, maybe she'll hear this. Maybe Jenna will. I just can't think of anything more, frankly, cuckish than sending in your ex-girlfriend's birthday to a podcast. Like, that's... That shows how torn up he is. He wants her back. She's not coming back.

She might. Well, this ain't going to help. Call me. Genevieve. Cool name. Hello, Dan. DF, 1927, day three. Let's see.

I fear I'm writing you on the sacred business Wednesday but I can't keep up the schedule keep up with the schedule due to Jake's excessive and unplanned vacations however as a fellow husband to a much more successful wife I understand how Jake's lavish lifestyle can look to lesser

men I write to you today as my wife's birthday and I thought why not maybe she'll get a chuckle out of getting a can look to lesser men. This is just... I write to you today as my wife's birthday, and I thought, why not? Maybe she'll get a chuckle out of getting a shout-out on the podcast that you pay for, and then he has the rolling eyes emoji. Apparently his wife is like, why? What's the point?

You're paying for this? Yeah. Happy birthday, Beezy. P.S. Blake, wily resident for seven years here. All right. I support you. Pirates.

However. Guys, I'm fire. Advanced metrics are indicating we have reached stabilized levels of Blake. Oh, so no more, no less. Yeah, we're right there. Analytics doesn't like me. Yeah. And a couple quickies that I'll just read.

They're non-birthday emails, but this one says, I popped into my closest Eatsies for some lunch today. The checkout line was stacking up. An employee came around, wanted to register, asked their coworker for the login code. Sheepishly, she told him, 6969. Should you really be reading this right now? What are people going to do?

Get behind the register and put it in? Check out themselves? I don't know. Should I? My suggestion is no, but I also didn't do it. He says, I looked over and gave the Adam Romo picture a mental hell yeah, brother. Thought I'd share the comedy as you are a comedy-based podcast.

I think I really wanted to read that and didn't really pay attention. Focus on the meat? I don't know. You want to beep out some of it? I can ask him. He's your friend. That's from Jacob.

And one more from Steve. He said, I just saw a Dumb Zone sticker in a North Richland Hills sushi restaurant men's room. Great pub. Awesome. It was not me, but. Day 2, 1288. So, yeah. I endorse that, right?

If you want to throw our sticker up in a... I don't recall where I was recently. I guess it was... It might have been whenever we were... Where did we go last that was far away? Might have been in Oklahoma. But I saw some very creative stall messages. Oh, that's right.

You are a guy who will... Pop in. It's a two-hour drive. Yeah. Saw some phone numbers. Dump on the way. I drank a pot of coffee before hitting in the car and I didn't have to stop on the way here.

I stopped on the way here and will stop on the way home and have already used the bathroom here. Amazing. People are still... Well, it's got to taper off right oh yeah i mean i don't it's it's nothing like the the dirtbag days we grew up in yeah but they're still out there i just never had a pencil on me a pencil whatever sharpie okay are you the impression that a pencil,

like you could just write that on a bathroom stall and that would work? No, if you had a number two, you could kind of carve it in there. But sometimes I think some of those guys, that's their bit. Yeah, for sure. They actually carry a Sharpie wanting to. For sure. I just remember the one when I was a little kid reading. As I write on bathroom walls,

I roll my S into little balls. Wait. Yeah. Can I say shit? You can say whatever you want. I know, we're at a public place i don't want kelly getting all mad he made me such a great plank salmon anyway i saw just the other day i saw the uh the ass

grass or uh cash cash sticker in one i love that i know you do so, as I write on bathroom walls, I roll my shit into little balls. He who reads these words of wit, eat those little balls of shit. That's really good. And that stuck with me. I was like eight, and I'm like... That's poetic. This is great. Yeah.

I can't wait. This is basically Shakespeare. I can't wait until I'm old enough to carry a Sharpie around and I'm... You guys want to do some kind of sports stuff? Sure. Do I have a sports open? Who's calling me? I don't know what I do for a living. Sort of. From the wonderful world of sports Radio Sports Scoreboard You know what I do for a living?

Sort of. I have some Steven. Let's do it. So Steven's at the Combine, and I guess I didn't really consider why it's Steven and not Jerry. Well, it's usually both, but it will only be one this time around. I can pretty much guarantee you that. I was thinking, I don't know, Jerry's old., but it will only be one this time around. I can pretty much guarantee you that. I was thinking, I don't know, Jerry's old. Maybe he's having a bad week, but he's

actually having a bad week for other reasons. Yeah. Okay. And so kind of like we noted yesterday, Steven is super generic. As we will note tomorrow. Yeah, Blake. Yeah. I have regrets. So yesterday we recorded... We don't have to stop down for this. We recorded a podcast to air it because we wanted to keep everybody's schedule regular and we're going to air

it tomorrow. But since this was a video show and it's a free show and all that, we wanted this to be day of. Yeah. so i i now think we should have just put out yesterday's yesterday because this is a weird mental game i'm playing all morning on well then just stop well he just said as we did yesterday and now tomorrow you're going to hear a podcast we're like hey, I have this new Steven Jones audio. Nobody cares.

I'm a perfectionist. Go on. So like we played tomorrow, we played some Steven audio tomorrow. So stupid. Like we will say tomorrow. Anyway, so you ask him about the draft. He's going to sit there and tell you. Just very cliche, right? Anyway, so you ask him about the draft. He's going to sit there and tell you.

Just very cliche, right? But he does mention a couple things, including his thoughts for Micah. So here's Steven at the Combine. Sports? I think that Micah, you know, it's just. See, it's getting there because it's. A guy who's very competitive. A guy who's. Pretty good. You know, he's all about See, it's getting there because it's – A guy who's very competitive, a guy who's – Pretty good. You know, who's all about football, if you will.

Right. I mean, we all understand – So I had to fade in. Faith and family as well, but football's got to be important to them. And then, you know, we just, you know, look for a guy who's going to really help take this team to the next level. And certainly we'll be spending a lot of time on that and trying to make sure

when we're picking a player that he fits those things. We certainly have obvious needs on both defense and offense that we'll need to look at with guys who are going to be free agents. Obviously, Tyron and Baidaz.

I'm sorry, who? Who is that? Tyler Biotish? That's who he's talking about. He said Baidaz. He thinks an offense that we'll need to look at with guys who are going to be free agents, obviously, Tyron and Baidaz. You know, you've got guys who are –

Because Biotish is a free agent this year. Yeah, Baidaz. And, you know, you've got guys who are – Because Beattish is a free agent this year. Yeah. Bye, Dez. Yeah, it sounds like a children's name for like a sheep that's Dez Bryant. Ah, Dez. Geez. Free on that side. Obviously, the linebacking situation, we got a little thin there. You know, what Mike's vision is for Micah.

Is he a true, you know, pass rusher most of the time? Last year he ended up, that's pretty much what he did. And I think very effective, but I think it hurt us with our linebacker depth because we were thinking he was going to do more linebacking. Linebackering, yeah. Oh, my God. Is that the fade you wanted? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's fine. That was all off the air, but go ahead. No, but he's saying that they wanted Micah to play more middle linebacker, and maybe they view him, and maybe Zimmer will come in and say, you're more valuable to us at linebacker. Okay, so you are saying he said something worthy of listening to you and not just at the beginning yeah um you know i think we've alleged that i think micah doesn't want to i think because of the money you make as an edge rusher and the stats you can put

up in that way also uh it's so much easier to find a guy to play middle linebacker than it is to rush off the edge. That's a disastrous decision. Yeah, let alone Micah wanting to do it. That's a bad call. That's where the Cowboys want him to do it. Yeah. Is this contract related at all?

Of course. Of course it is. But also, you know, it's Leighton related. And it's Jabril Cox failed related, and they've been trying to play 210-pound safeties at linebacker for two years related. So you can just go find a guy. The idea of taking Micah off the edge is like the dumbest thing

I could possibly imagine for their defense. And it seems to be picking up a lot of steam. Well, yeah, because he noted that Quinn liked to play a lot of three safety looks, two linebackers, and Zimmer is more of a three linebackers guy. Well. More old school. So maybe we do see that more next year. All right. So I have a piece of Stephen Jones audio that I found a few weeks ago, actually,

and we just never got to it. But it was on that Cowboys podcast with Saad. About the Cowboys. Good listen. Machoda. Machoda. And then there's one guy I'm not as familiar with. Kent Garrison.

Okay, so did he used to work for the Cowboys? Yes. So tell me if this disturbs you as much as it does me, because we are clearly ushering in the Stephen Jones era where he will be the GM and owner of the team. Unless it's Alexandra. Right. the GM and owner of the team and all that. Unless it's Alexandra.

Right. So, okay, so they're – I'm trying to remember. They're just talking – I can't remember what led into this, but he ends up giving a draft day story because apparently he worked for the Cowboys media and he would have access to – I don't know if he says all this it's only a minute clip but he had access to all the the phone calls and the tapes and everything uh and then they would have to go through all the many hours of it and then pare it down to see what you get on the

website okay steven jones story here uh when i worked there one of my favorite parts was after the draft going through all the tape of the draft and seeing who called them because it's all recorded you know like all the all the all the trade requests and all that it's all it's all they're just seeing you know all that like so this is how they down, you know, when they could or, or, or listening, seeing and listening, the lions called him and, and offered him somebody and Steven was like, who's that? And I mean, it was, it was a pretty decent name. And he was like, who he's a blah, blah, blah.

And they explained who it is. He's like, Oh, we'll call you back. And Steven just like hangs up the phone and just sits there and keeps watching the draft doesn't even tell anyone that somebody called doesn't even ask will who this guy is and then the guy calls back like five minutes later it's like hey do you think about that he's like yeah no bye but it was just pretty like how i imagine it that like hey he didn't even know who the player was. And B, didn't attempt to look it up and see if it might be worth looking into. I hate being a fan of this team. That feels like...

Fireable? If you were like a normal job? If he wasn't a Jones, like you don't want to – Maybe Alex would be better. I thought we uncover every – turn over every rock and we're always looking for everywhere and just not – and okay, so I think I set it up pretty good that like elsewhere in the audio, he was kind of like, you know, it wasn't a huge name. It wasn't Megatron, but it was a guy I've heard of.

Yeah, I mean I feel like if you're running an NFL team, you should know 50 players on every team. Maybe not all 90, you know, but somewhere close to that. And if not, you should at least follow up afterward. And sometimes when people call, they are saying, they are trying to find a match. Like, oh, wait, I know they lack linebacker depth. Yeah.

Actually, we have these guys. What if we did a little swap? And it might not, you know, it's not the Roy Williams trade or the, you know. Joey Galloway. Yeah. It's not earth shattering, but it's, that's what wins you, right? The little tiny things. Yeah. And like, we've joked about this before,

and it's not like I think you have to just work 24-7, 365. But I mean, dude, when I saw him in Montana, I'm like, shouldn't you be at work or something? Like we were at a music festival, and he was just like, I don't know. He was doing what you thought he was doing. He was just housing Brown. And I'm like, man, I don't know. I feel like if you have like one of these like extremely high profile jobs in the summer, you should just be like nose to the grindstone all the time. Now the flip side of that is like the people who would yell at Romo to like

be out front throwing a tire to a football whenever he was like with metal school or on Lake Louisville or whatever but I don't know it just seems to me like it's the same thing as always they're just about a lot more than doing the job that's really bad though I was surprised that didn't catch more fire and become a big that's really big local public story. That's not good. Maybe just people haven't heard it. And now they will on this huge podcast. That's right.

Well, he goes on, and I think this is the Randy Gregory situation, because Steven apparently botched that, right, where Gregory had a deal with Jerry, and then Jerry handed it to Stephen, who got the numbers wrong. You're going to have to walk me through it, Jake. But they had a chance to bring back Randy Gregory two years ago. Is that right? Yeah. I mean, what it really came down to was that they wanted to be able to void his contract

if he got suspended. And the Broncos were like, no, we'll just pay you. And his agent said, well. With his history, yeah. Yeah, I mean, you've been suspended a lot. You're probably going to get suspended again. And similar to Demarcus Lawrence, right? The Demarcus Lawrence one was that Stephen told him,

hey, we're not restructuring your deal. We're not going to give you more guaranteed money. And either Lawrence went to Jerry or Jerry went to Lawrence and was like, yeah, we definitely are. Get Stephen on the phone. And they just sidelined Stephen. He doesn't have a lot of power. He just talks like he does.

Except that one draft day when Jerry went to Manziel wanted to tackle him over Manziel's draft card. Yeah, and I think his value of players, I mean, this could all just be public negotiations because he's going to have to get Micah and CD done here in the near future. But this is kind of troubling for me in his just evaluation of how to beat the salary cap. But the cap has gone up tremendously. So it's, you know, to me it's not a lot different.

It's just, you know, how many guys you're trying to fit in there. And to me it's, you know, it's about players. You know, we had a situation last year where you end up losing a guy, but you end up getting four players rather than what you might have paid one player and you know that's the way you have to look at it would you rather have you know three or four players for three and four and five million a piece or one player for 20 million so those are the you know things you get into weighing in terms of you know where you better off i'd rather have the $20 million guy. Depends on your team, but in general, I would agree.

Dude, every year this happens. Oh, yeah. The only thing I'm surprised by is he didn't mention the pie. Right, yeah. The pie is every year. I mean, Jerry and I aren't making any more money. Right, no. But you can see the negotiations, right? Micah, we can't really pay you this.

And then if anything like that happens, hey, well, I mean, look, we got Durant Armstrong coming in. We re-signed Leighton Vander Esch. Like, you get 11 guys on the field. Don't you want the best 11? As far as talent and not value? Alex Davis can't be worse. Although they have won 36 games. So how does this work? Like,

does he actually have to go? In my mind, I thought that you actually had to go and eject into a cup. I'm learning it's actually just like a cotton swab. Yeah. Which that's disappointing to me. You thought a DNA test was like a IVF appointment? Kinda. Can he do that? And so with 23 in need, you think all the guys are doing that in a cup and sending it off? That's a really good question.

Yeah, are you an idiot? I guess I thought it would at least be blood. But not like a swab of your cheek. I mean, they could take a hair, can't they? To prove paternity? That sounds bad for me.

DNA? I don't know. I know you can get a hair drug test, like a follicle test for drug tests. No, but I'm just thinking of CSI or something. How do they find the Golden State Killer or whatever? Yeah, Harry was left at the crime scene. Yeah, and we were able to match his DNA.

This all sounds pretty sensible. 23 and me, you're just kind of hammering away. He's constantly, order me another one. I want to do 20. They actually send you, yeah, a Playboy and a vial. The clinic needed it. Some Beats, some wireless Beats. Your clinic needed it in 15 minutes,

but you're going to ship it across the country for 23andMe. That's a really good point, Blake. That's a really good point. Dental records, something? Like, is it just? Like, I just saw that they said they were only going to do a cotton like cheek swab and to me that doesn't seem like if i'm jerry i'm like i that feels like uh not provable no um no I don't know.

Like a lie detector test. You can't take that to court and that be 100%, right? Okay, but we've come a long way with DNA technology, dude. And it's just cotton swab on your cheek. That's it. And you could prove who you're related to? If you throw that water bottle away, we could get the crime lab to get your spit off of there. Haven't you seen that?

Yeah, we talked about it with that one bank robber guy. It was like a Gatorade bottle or whatever. But I didn't know that was the same. I thought they had to match that with something else they had from you. Not match that with your child. Well, yeah, if they already have your DNA on file. Right. Or, yes, if it's the, now we have semen at the crime scene, and I got that bottle that you drank from, that, hey, that does match this.

How did you think they got DNA from women? Hmm. They swabbing something else? No. Why do they call you guys? Wouldn't you want to be the Frisco? Yeah, that's a bad point. Think about the Frisco RN that has to go in and swab Jerry's cheek.

Or in your world. Yeah, that'd be a lot better than the R.N. that has to just, you know, handy. Yeah, get a burst of dust. Like, will they go to him? Yes. When's the last time he's been to a doctor's office? Right. Does he just have... I mean, they've got a medical facility at the Star,

so I would imagine, like, a lot of the things that he gets done, preventative care and stuff like that happens in Frisco. But, like, when's the last time he just sat in a waiting room and filled out, like, those laborious forms where you're like, you have all this info already? When's the last time he flew coach? Man. Similar? Well, time he flew coach? Man. Similar?

Well, time period? Probably before. Probably 26 years ago. Yeah, around the time. Oh, yeah, because he was booking a flight with the. Yeah, in Fayetteville or Little Rock maybe. All right, that's great stuff. That's probably a good ender to Steven.

That's great. Topic number one. What is your position on the role of government in supporting innovation in the field of biotechnology? Well, Dean, I'm glad that you asked that question. Actually, I'd like to jump in and take that one, Jimmy, if you don't mind. Have at it, horse. Recent research has shown that empirical evidence for globalization

of corporate innovation is very limited. And as a corollary, the market for technologies is shrinking. As a world leader, it's important for America to provide systematic research grants for our scientists. I believe strongly there will always be a need for us to have a well-articulated innovation policy with emphasis on human resource development. Thank you. Thank you.

What happened to Blacktop? You're listening to The Dumb Zone. Not that far off. This is so fun here in Athens, Texas. So did you... You parked out front. I got a great spot. I did.

Well, you got to watch. It's a two-hour limit. Find me. Okay. Here's the guy with the rich wife. Oh, my God. Let it go. Whatever.

I'm hemorrhaging money. I'm not worried about money. Do you look out? Just... Do you know what Blake's car looks like? I do. I do. I do, yeah. Just come over here for a second.

Okay. I need you to look at it and then walk back. Okay. I don't know that you'll be able to stretch. Can you see it? Here, what if I do this? Yeah, I can see it. See the blue guy?

Yeah. What do you see? Did you back in? Mm-hmm. Back in guy, huh? Back in parking guy. All I hear all my life is ridicule.

Oh, look at this old man. He backs in just like all the other olds. Or is it all the other brilliance? Yeah, I mean, you're not going to believe how fast I'm going to get out of here.

That's what I'm saying. It's going to be insane. However – You'll be in Wiley before you know it. No, I pulled in the one-way parking lot the wrong way. I don't want to hear it. And so if you're going the wrong way – because the parking spots are angled. And so rather than just try to, like, whip it in there forward, I just drive past it and back in.

And how many – there's such a – It's a tight – There's a million parking spots in there. I just drive past it and back in. How many? It's such a... There's a million parking spots in there. I thought you and I had one thing. Not a lot of spaces available. One thing together. I had to grab that one. I already burned the Apple thing. Welcome over here.

We can't make fun of him for the Apple thing anymore. Well, you ruined that. I did ruin that, but I thought we still had the pull-in forward parking thing together. Yeah, but I was going the wrong way, and it was just easier to back in. Had a lot of gear with me, too, to bring in here. I'm on my own on everything now. Oh!

I talk you up in the Dallas Observer, and this is what I get. Yeah, you did. Thank you. Are we doing a monthly business review for our show? Oh, yeah. Is that the thing I was supposed to remind you? No, there was something else. I mean, we don't have to do it today. Okay.

I think he's happy. It doesn't sound like he's exactly prepared for that. Probably shouldn't. I feel like yesterday you were so gung-ho. The TexanAthens.com. Come get married here. Okay. I'm going to.

Now? Oh, not today, but the second one will definitely. When you renew your vows? Hmm. What do you think of people who do that? Jake is definitely going to have to do that at some point. Yeah. I mean, I definitely know people who have done it,

and it's always a little bit suspicious. I mean, I definitely know people who have done it, and it's always a little bit suspicious. Is it like you know he cheated on her? Could go both ways. I empower women. Yeah, but I don't think that'd be the answer for like if your wife cheated on you, it wouldn't be like, oh, yeah. Let's give her a new Arvalis. Yeah, let's really make sure the world knows that we are. Yeah, you're probably right.

I don't know. I just really like this place is what I'm saying, Dan. It is great. Let's move here now. Okay. Yeah. Oh, by the way, congrats on the Dallas Observer article about you. What?

Yesterday, it dropped. Kelly Dearmore. Yeah, no, we referenced it less than two minutes ago. You did? Yeah. You guys all got to see this in person. Everybody else heard it? Yeah, no.

We brought up us complimenting Blake and the Dallas Observer no less than two or three minutes ago. Yeah. Like since the break? Oh, yeah. Yeah. Oh. Like right after back in parking.

You guys see how this works? Yeah. Yeah. How was it? How did I react? You did. You really didn't. Now we understand why.

Yeah. You were not paying attention. I was just kind of thinking about, did we read quotes from that? Because I just thought there was one funny one. Which was what? Probably his. Yeah, it was you. Which was what?

I don't know. You were all like, yeah, we told him to F off. Oh, yeah. I don't know. I thought we just kind of said we disagreed. We said... Yeah, I feel like those are the same thing

he did have to clear up mcdowell a little more diplomatic wanted to put on a white glove and go duel that's on my uh on our show's headstone or whatever you know damn mcdow down a little bit more diplomatic a little bit more yeah you know no i mean i feel like uh i feel like if you want to you want to mock it you can but i also think there were plenty of times where you were uh you and i were using the terms fuck off oh my oh my i perhaps perhaps there was yeah but of course my public persona is a 180 from what you see uh when when you get behind closed doors that's why you want to schedule one of these remotes that's right because uh you will see me unleashed brother like during breaks oh yeah it was uh

Like during breaks? Oh, yeah. It was off the chain. It's obviously weird. I feel like every single time you get interviewed, you're like, why did I agree to do this? Nothing ever comes off the way that you want it to. Yeah, you know what?

So Kelly Dearmore. And he's awesome, dude. Yeah, we've known him a long time. I wanted to call him over the weekend. And then I thought I'd be like, doesn't like Adam Schefter would call somebody? Like somebody's agent? Yeah, they call him like, no, no, can you shape this? Because afterwards I'm like, I just don't want to, I don't know. I don't want to toot our own horn, and I don't want to...

You've made that very clear. I'm trying not to burn a bridge. Obviously, they don't care about the bridge. Yeah. But I'm just... When I'm in the middle of stuff, like I've referenced Dayton recently, or maybe it's tomorrow. I don't know when.

But I worked in Dayton for a guy that it really drove me nuts and I had to write you know a journal about it and it just uh and I always kind of vowed in my man this guy I'm gonna mf him when I leave and I'm gonna you know prove to the and then it was like okay well that's the past and I just don't want to almost I don't care whatever I want I just want to go my own way and do my thing and don't want them effing with me. And why do I need to eff with them? And that's what I feel about this whole situation too. Yeah, and I think just like from a personal standpoint, you know, as I've gotten older, it's been really great.

I'm not trying to like butter you up here, but it's been great for me just to know you because you're way more like, let's just let stuff go. You know me. I want to come in and slap somebody. Yeah, let's go at it. The way that I feel like I'm, I don't want to say raised, but I'm by nature a very aggressive person. Let's handle this head on. Yeah, and I feel like being around you. aggressive person. Like let's handle this head on. Yeah, and I feel like being around you. I'm like passive aggressively.

Let's handle it that way. Yeah, exactly. Being around you for. Just make a little snide comment now and again. Every now and then, yeah. For such a large portion of my adult life has helped me on that front. But at the same time. He did turn you into cat guy.

He did turn me into cat guy. That's right. But at the same time, you know, I mean, I don't mind saying, like, I am bothered by how some of this has been handled and not by us. So I don't feel like we have to not say that anymore if we think it. Yeah. No. So that is what it is.

I think we should say whatever we want, and maybe it's, you know, maybe you don't want to say it. Maybe I don't want to say as much, but it doesn't mean I don't want you to. Yeah, and trust me, I'm not saying 80% of what I'd like to. But here we are. Yeah. Everyone's doing good. Except us.

Right. No, I mean, it was even a weird weekend just because it was, you know, for those very few who don't know that we used to work for the Ticket in Dallas, and it was their big celebration every year. It was Ticket Stock Weekend, and it was their 30th anniversary. They just went through that as well, had a big show. And, you know, it was just weird to not – I mean, Blake said it in that article. Yeah, he went way harder than I did.

Yeah, trying to erase you guys. I don't really think that's the case. I personally think – I do. I kind of think it's like – it's so fresh and early. I mean, I would just hope as time goes that we can all i mean i already get along with like all the people there of course and so maybe it's you know just the whole place to an agreement.

Like, why, we are not actively, I didn't sue anyone. I was fending off a lawsuit. Correct. You know, we, I think we bent over backwards trying to show, look, number one, I don't even know if we can or not, but we are not going to go after any sponsors for the six month period. We're not going to, you know what? We're even going to go behind a paywall. That's how much we feel. We do not want to affect the revenue or the ratings of the place we used to work because I care deeply about all the guys that are still there and so I want life to go on well for them and I just hope that it does

for us we're trying to you know make something happen here so that's the only it's more of a little disappointment kind of I mean I don't expect them to have a wing for us at Ticket Stock or anything or invite us over, possibly in the future. I don't know. I wouldn't count on that. But, I mean, you know, guys have left and gone on to do other things. I think you've mentioned this before. You know, like Mark Elfenbein, who is a great dude, left the station and went on to directly compete with me, with Bob and Dan.

You weren't on the show yet, right? No. Right before that. Yeah, I was about to be added as your board op right around that time. Because, you know, it's not like we've only worked together for three years. We've worked together for like 15 years. And then, you know, he's welcomed back into the fold eventually when he was summarily dismissed by the Bob and Dan juggernaut.

Just routed. I mean, who could go up against that besides just about everybody? All right. I didn't mean to have that talk even. I was a little bit surprised that you wanted to, but it's totally fine with me. Hey, you never know what's going to happen with these two wild cards. You just never know. I just think that the main thing for me is that there are generations of new memories

that are alive again here in Athens, Texas because of the Texan. Yes. In Athens, Texas, because of the Texan. Yes. In Athens, Texas. The Texan, kind of the epicenter of maybe the heartbeat. It's got to be the heartbeat. The nerve center. That's right. Like what happens here stays here.

That's right. Or something. I'm trying to figure stuff out. No, that works. You want to call our guest? Sure. See if we can. So do you want to set this up?

Yeah. No, that works. You want to call our guest? Sure. See if we can. So do you want to set this up? Yeah, so while the dial tone is going or whatever. Yeah. Yeah. You got to talk over the beef so they can't track the phone number. So we got an email from a guy. You may remember him, speaking of our former employer. He was a valedictorian at his high school, and he recited the My Pig speech. Oops.

That's too many numbers. His name is Easton and he emailed us and was like, hey, here's a news story about my parents. They were involved in a helicopter crash in Kauai. And they lived.

Hello. Hello, sir. Hello, sir. Hello, sir. Is this Easton Wolfe's dad? Indeed. Indeed. This is I'm the father, the proud father of the Val Victorian pig boy.

The My Pig Kid. This is My Pig Kid. It's not Easton Wolf. What's your name, sir? Troy. Troy. So not... I thought it was Winston.

No. This is Troy. You know Winston Wolf? No, you brought this up before. I feel like I should know this punchline, but I don't. Oh, you don't. Okay. Well, when you figure it out, just know that as the pilot was landing the helicopter, there

was a Winston Wolf tie-in of like, let's not get ahead of ourselves about how this is going to go well. So, Troy, tell us, what have your last four or five days been like? Oh, really? It's honestly been the last probably 48 hours. We just flew back, got into DFW today, so my days are getting confused a little bit. But I guess this was Wednesday?

Yes, Wednesday afternoon in Hawaii is when all this happens. And it's been crazy. We were scheduled to fly home today anyway, so it worked out good because I couldn't – I wouldn't think it would be much of a vacation if this happened like on day two and we had four or five days left. It would be kind of a bummer. Yeah, you don't just go lay by the pool after falling out of the sky no no you don't so it worked out pretty good and

we were going to do some things sometimes flights don't leave Hawaii until uh you know late in the evening so you can fly overnight and so we kind of had a plan after the helicopter ride to do some things in the town that day and do some exploring but we just decided to chill instead so what exactly happened well so as old as you get old in life dan Dan, you try to find things that are adventurous, that don't get you motion sickness. And my wife and I have kind of just said, you know, we're not doing boat stuff anymore. We can't really handle the motion.

But, you know, let's try the helicopter. We think that would be great. Let me just say off the bat interesting decision i would think that would like hey i don't want to go on a boat boat is worse than helicopter really for sure okay no doubt i mean i just had the vision of a helicopter doesn't feel you've been on one though right yeah i was in kawaii oh that's right in fact we did a mine was big island but yeah a little tour of whatever probably a similar tour that you went on. Yeah, probably the same thing, Dan.

I mean, I thought the helicopter would be a little more consistent as far as, you know, flight path. And I think what gets you in trouble on the water is just the back and forth and, you know, the different movements and things like that. I just don't hear a lot of, you don't see any news story about, ooh, this guy died on a boat. As much, I don't think, as maybe a helicopter or a small plane, you know? That's true. I was just playing the odds, though, you know? Okay.

So, actually, it's weird. I think about you guys a lot on vacation. And so we just passed the Jurassic Park waterfall. And, you know, I thought of, as he's showing it to us, and the music's going off in my head, and I'm thinking about Jake crying. Seriously, I did. And it was beautiful. But you think about things like that. And we kind of saw that we're about 30 minutes into the trip. And Dan, you said you've been on it. You know, that whole west side of Kauai, you can't really get to except by boat or helicopter and we kind of took a turn

to the right to go up that west coast line of Kauai and we started smelling something that was different and I kind of just thought it was you know just because we changed directions it might have been a different you know way the wind was blowing or whatever. Didn't really think anything of it. And then all of a sudden, the pilot kind of gets a little bit lower, and I hear him say, we're going to try to land. And five seconds after that, there was just a kind of a, and the engine lets loose and just lets go,

and we just start kind of free-falling. Okay, so what's going through your head? You know, honestly, I didn't really know at the time what was going on because my wife was in the front. She's in the front middle, so they put you in these helicopters based on height and weight. And so I didn't really know what was going on up there. She knew more than I did because she could read the body language of the pilot

and all that stuff, and I couldn't really see out front of me. I could see out the sides. By the way, this helicopter has no doors by the way geez and so we're kind of headed into a cliff when I heard the pop and honestly I thought about Kobe for real and like Kobe actually he actually did. Not that this is the way it's going to go down. Like this is pretty similar. But then he kind of veered back to the right.

And I don't know a whole lot about helicopter aerodynamics or engineering or how that works. But I guess. Well, we'll help you out there. We're on top of it. What do you need? Well, it auto rotates. You know, when the engine lets go and the engine stops turning the blade, I would think gravity and air would keep moving the rotor.

Maybe, Jerry? I don't know. But he did have some control over the helicopter, probably limited control. But then we crashed on a beach, and he did a great job salvaging what we could, obviously. So what was left of the helicopter? Like, when you emerge from the wreckage, what does it look like?

Is it destroyed? Yeah, oh, yeah. Yeah, it's totaled. It's just kind of a wadded-up piece. This is a really dumb, like, Scooby-Doo-type question, but are you not worried about the blade no i'll tell you what i was worried about though jake because at that time when we got out by the time we we get out of there it still felt like a minute or two to get out which is probably was

only 30 seconds you know how that stuff goes and everything was stopped. And what I was worried about was, you know, like it blowing up. That's what happens in movies and stuff, right? And so the pilot assured us that he'd cut the fuel line off or whatever, however you do that stuff. But, no, the blade didn't't that didn't enter my mind now that the tail rotor was probably 50 or 70 feet in front of us as far as the crash site goes um but it was in it's just right it's in a beach between i know dan you said you've been out there it's just that's all just huge peaks on that coastline and he just he set it down just on a beach, you know, between two huge peaks.

You say set it, I'm sorry. Were there people on the beach that were responding to you? No. You can't even, yeah. You can't get, actually they found out later it's the beach that we're, I don't know, I know Blake hadn't watched this, but the James Bond movie, I think it's Man with the Golden Gun, they shot a scene there. But no, it's so remote, I mean, the only way to that beach is either boat or helicopter. And you said put it down, I mean, what was the impact like? I mean, it was just a hard one.

Did you land like a car crash? I don't know. I guess how tragic. Go ahead. Well, he landed on the bottom of the helicopter. I don't know what you call that, the way a helicopter should land, but he's kind of coming in. He's not coming straight down.

He's coming in more like an airplane as far as with a little bit of forward momentum. And so when it hit the sand, the left side of it dug in, and it just kind of rolled. Damn. And those cabs, I guess, are made to wear almost like an F1 car or whatever, just kind of like a roll cage. And so we were all pretty well protected inside that,

except for the female passenger that's still in the hospital. But other than that. Oh, dear. What was the pilot's demeanor like? He was unbelievably calm and awesome. I think all those guys are almost all ex-military. Probably so. And, you know, he was kind of debriefing afterwards.

I know they practiced some of that auto rotation stuff. Obviously not in those conditions. But he was extremely calm and I mean without him you know if he made a decision to he did say that there was a secluded beach three miles away that he thought about trying to land to if he tried to go to that I don't think we make it because we were just at the right height to where he was able to get to get into our beach pretty safely so if it's not a beach it's the water it's the cliff or the water okay water would you be alive cliff perhaps

no cliff i think i think we're done um yeah and you're you're trapped in your seatbelt. Water, I don't know. I don't think so. So you said there's no doors. So you were in the middle in the back? No, there were five total. So you have the pilot and four passengers.

Pilot is front left. My wife is in the middle. And then the female passenger is still in the hospital. Pilot and four passengers. Pilot is front left. Oh, okay. My wife is in the middle. And then the female passenger that's still in the hospital, she's front right. And I was behind her and back right. And then her boyfriend was back left. Okay. So do they have any sort of, I don't know, helicopter chasing lawyers that can get you to cash in and bro down?

I don't know, Jake. I'm not that kind of person. We know some lawyers. Yeah. Yeah. I know. I know. I'm sure that there will be something coming out of this,

especially the girl that's still in the hospital in Kauai. She's going to have to have some rehab time and miss work and all that, so I'm sure there'll be some damages come out of there. But as far as Shannon and I are concerned, we just have some bumps and bruises and just lucky to be alive and get back to town. Was she injured because, like you said, there's no doors and then it kind of landed on the side? Did she take the brunt of that?

The girl that's still in the hospital, yes, she did. Now, my wife was in the middle, and she was fine. But, yeah, the girl that was on the front right, pretty much the helicopter came to a stop. She was the one that was injured. So have you asked your wife, like, when you first got seated, was she like, oh, that sucks. She got the open door. She got the better seat.

She was a little perturbed, but she wasn't getting the good videos that Katie was getting on the other side. And I saw her at one point. I saw my wife stop videoing, and I kind of thought she might be getting motion sickness a little bit, but she just said she was kind of getting pissed that she wasn't getting good videos, so she just kind of stopped and took in the view.

Jeez. Did you get a refund? Maybe a coconut shrimp voucher or something? Did you go to Yelp to express your displeasure? Well, so they took us to the ER, which is fine. We probably needed to get checked out because we were supposed to fly out the next day, and we wanted to make sure we were fit to fly and everything. And so it's funny.

I was checking my phone, and I saw the email come through where they refunded the trip, and I'm like, oh, at least I didn't have to ask. And then I think an email came through later that evening or something as far as a trip recommendation or putting it on Yelp or whatever, and so they probably don't want me doing that. They're asking for five stars. Two stars. Not one.

be doing that they're asking for five stars two star i would give them two just for the pilot because he saved our he saved our life yeah one star is you are at a point where you can't make that review i think correct i think two is warranted because the pilot was was so good. He's your Sully. He is. I didn't think about it that way. Yeah. But I think with Sully, Dan, I think a lot of pilots could have done that. I'm not sure. That's what I'm saying.

How many helicopter pilots could do this one? Yeah. Well, you are a, you're a subscriber, so we're very glad. Although, had you not survived. It would have just kept auto-renewing. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah. Damn. Well, his account would have closed at some point. At some point. But the main thing is, yeah, that we retained $7 a month. Yeah, I'm glad. When that pilot landed the bird. Yeah.

Mm-hmm. Yeah, so it's a win-win for everybody, I think. Yeah, now that we've had you on, too, you might be like, okay, I'll definitely keep subscribing to these guys. Maybe that's the key for us, is we just need to have everybody on as a guest. Everybody almost die? Oh. Yeah, no, we just...

Something like that. I did think at one time, too, that after the crash, because we had to wait about two hours for them to come get us. I did think that, because there's no cell phone or anything, I did wonder if we would have died, would I have been the most famous one on there? That did come to my head. That's the Dandowell way based on being my pig's dad my pig kid's dad yeah i think so i think so and then also the

another difficult part is how do you think we got back to the airport? No. How do you get on another helicopter? No. No boats? No, Jake. That west side of that island, I mean, it's like tidal waves and stuff over there. I'm not getting on a boat. Are you demanding the middle seat? Oh, my God. No, but I did think, you know what? I might as well do this.

What are the chances? It's the classic. Who were we talking about yesterday? The reverse Nate Newton? Hollywood Henderson? Yeah. We're going to talk about that tomorrow. Oh, sorry.

Jesus. We recorded a show yesterday, Troy. It's throwing us all off. So, Troy, we often hear about, you know, like makeup relations or maybe you got divorced oh yeah 9-11 and traumatic experience is there like some sort of we survived a helicopter crash love that you want to tell us about boy that's a that's a phenomenal question blake no i mean what do you mean blake like i don't understand the question sometimes you guys have awesome sex that night? That's what Blake is saying.

Oh. Yeah, we just went through this together. We've heard about 9-11 babies, you know, like, oh, we just had a traumatic experience together. Let's do it. I see what you're saying. No, not yet. That all happened before. We're celebrating our 25th anniversary, so

we don't have sex. All the banging was done before... Sorry, Easton. Right. Yeah, yeah, for sure. Sorry, Easton. Banging. Easton knows.

But no, after... Easton has heard. Easton has lied in bed with his hands over his ears. We were too sore to do anything. We just kind of sat there and got a pizza and looked around. Yeah, that sounds like my anniversary. It actually sounds like every day. Well, which is every day and my around. Yeah, that sounds like my anniversary. It actually sounds like every day. Well, which is every day and my anniversary.

The woman in the hospital, though, what were her, like, you have to wait two hours. Has she got a bone sticking out of her skin? What's going on? No, she ended up having a fractured, I think, two fractured vertebrae, I think. She was laying down on the beach, and my wife was pretty much mothering her because she was pretty scared.

She's kind of in her 20s. With her boyfriend, didn't really have any family there, so she was a little anxious. My wife did a wonderful job taking care of her. But no, she really couldn't move her lower body. a little anxious and so my wife did a wonderful job taking care of her and but no she was um you're like good i really couldn't move her lower body so where's the bruise yeah yeah yeah well we're glad that you're not dead yeah me too thanks yeah you ever gonna do one of those again?

No, probably not. You know, out where we live, hunting hogs in helicopter, that's real big, and I've often wanted to do that, but I don't think I'll do that again. Get the AR? Helicopter no more. I'll tell you what, though. I have kind of always wanted to do that.

Oh Jake I got a ranch come out and shoot it. In AR? From a helicopter dude? Yeah. Like how close

are you going to get to feeling like Rambo? Right. I was thinking The hanging out the hanging out of the helicopter part but yeah go ahead.

Yeah were you upset, let's say, that you weren't the only survivor? Jeez. He's got a wife. Oh, yeah, she might hear this. She's sitting right here next to me. Yeah, yeah, we'll ask you next week. Speak to that.

Have you ever seen Bruce Willis, though, the movie Unbreakable? That's it. I would feel like a badass if I were you. Yeah, you could, I mean, roll the dice today.

Yeah. Go parachute jump without a parachute type thing. You know, all that stuff. Or what do you call that? Yeah, I'm pretty old

for that stuff, man. What would you say? Parachute jump without a parachute doesn't make sense. Skydive without a parachute. Skydive, yeah. I have trouble with words there, man. What would you say? Parachute jump without a parachute doesn't make sense. Skydive without a parachute. Skydive, yeah. I have trouble with words there, Troy.

I do too, Dan. Yeah. It's getting worse as it gets older. Yeah, well. Well, thanks. Thanks for joining us. Thanks for the story. Thanks for having that happen to you

to entertain us. Thanks for being alive. Yeah. Nope. Anytime, guys. Yeah. Nope. Anytime, guys. Love you guys. What do you want to promote? Can I get a closing comment?

Yeah, no. Give us your final thoughts. Closing remark. Can we get tractor trailers and trucks out of the Texasx Express lane, TxDOT lanes. That is a worthy cause. I would agree with you on that. I mean, it's unbelievable, man. They're screwing the whole thing up.

I'm paying this premium. You know why they're in there, right? For the cash, yeah, you got to follow the money, right? Because they're charging them probably double. Those drivers don't have to pay for that. They're on every tollway and every express lane. How did this guy just come in with a transportation-related hot opinion to walk home? Because he just drove home.

He died two days ago. He just drove home. From the airport or something? And he's stuck behind someone right now, and that's what he's bitching about. No, I'm actually in Minner Wells driving back home. Blake, what is the Minner Wells mascot? Oh, man. Rams? Yeah, there you go.

Okay. Wow. All right. You're headed to Graham, right? Scott does not miss. Yeah, Graham. So what's Graham? Steers.

Okay, what are the girls called? Oh. Didn't we just do this? Certainly not the cows. That was a different. That was Bridgeport. Oh. It's not the lady steer, is it?

No. The queers. Okay. Yep, that was awesome. Good guess. Lady blues. Okay. Yeah, that was awesome. Good guess. Lady blues. Okay. Yeah, that's better than sissies.

Sissies. Yeah, it's better than sissies. Q's. Better than sissies. What about the graham crackers? No? Ooh, yeah. I'll bet the demographics would work out there.

That's probably on par, I would guess. Yeah. Well, this has been riveting. Yeah, man. Tell us about the helicopter crash sex, would you? Okay. Yeah. Send us an email later.

Yeah, yeah. We'll reconvene at a later date. All right. Good talking to you. Say hi to Winston or Easton or whatever kid you want to say hi to for us. Will do. He's at University of Alabama and listens to you guys all the time. All right.

Roll Tide. All right. See you, man. Roll Tide. See you. Bye. That's Troy Wolfe. That's good stuff.

That was awesome. What if you had a kid who was a valedictorian? Would you feel, like, proud or like, boy, I really underachieved? Yeah, like, gosh, this is in me somewhere. But I just effed it all up. Yeah. See, I can't even answer that. I was so far from having a kid who was about to.

Your kids are pretty successful, though. I mean, a hell of a lot more successful than, at this stage, you. Yeah, for sure. But. I mean, I would even say, I look at, like, my five-year-old now, and I'm like, you're outpacing me for what I was at, like, eight. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I think...

You take the pride and not the jealousy? Yeah, I don't feel like I'm yet jealous of my kids at this point. Give it time. How long have we been going, Blake, Jake? Who are you? About 150. It's probably time then, huh? Hit it.

Here's Jake with the Dumb Zone News. We're leaving so much on the table today. Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton has sued Pornhub's parent company for allegedly violating state law by failing to implement age verification measures to ensure that children cannot access the adults-only sites. I agree that they have not done that. You can confirm? I believe so, because there are sites that you'll just have to click.

It's silly. It is really silly. Because you don't really do anything. You just click a button. It says, are you 18? Yes or no? Yeah, and the ones that are really ridiculous are, it's not like I'm going to a bunch of beer and liquor websites,

but when I used to have to get copy points for, you know, and our former employer, you would go there, and it's like, enter your birthday. I did that on a tobacco. I bought Chew through the mail a couple times, and I thought that would be cheaper, and it wasn't. Do you want a trivia question? Yeah, like the click all the stop signs?

I don't know, but it does make me think of the time that I went to get a fake ID at Vicon Village. And they were like, all right, so you want an Oklahoma ID? I'm like, yeah, this is the one I've heard is the easiest one to get by with. And they were like, all right, so you want an Oklahoma ID? I'm like, yeah, this is the one I've heard is the easiest one to get by with. And they were like, fill out your address. And I wrote Brown Trail, Bedford, Texas. They're like, you want me to put Bedford, Texas on an Oklahoma ID? How old were you?

Obviously not old enough to. No, 18 or 19. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. So then you put down one, two, three, Main Street. Yeah, Oklahoma Avenue. Yeah. What do you think about people that get fired up, like the porn industry itself?

Like, we don't think you should have to have age verification. I mean, you do to drink. You do to stuff. So why not? Yeah, I mean, I think you definitely should. I don't know how they do it, you know, but I mean, I, I also think that for guns and, you know, driving, you know, you have to verify and get a license for a lot of things. I don't know about a license to porn, but at least to prove you're 18, what's wrong with that? Okay. No, I have no problem with that. You're probably fighting a losing battle,

just like you are with all the other things you just mentioned, right? I mean, probably everybody here who wanted to could find alcohol before they were 21. You could find somebody that could get you a dip or something like that. But, no, I do think uh as sex positive as i am uh i don't think it was great that i had unfiltered access to internet porno when i was 16 right and that was not like because it was being encouraged by any means it was just that it was the internet and it's was like, well, I'm in shop class.

Let's hop on here with no firewall. And that was then. Yeah, now. Because think of now. Yeah, I was having to wait an entire first period to see half a boob. How easily available it is now. Which then makes, you know, this is stuff you got to deal with. Oh, I know, dude.

Your kid, first of all, I feel like, you know, every year it's younger and younger. Like, oh, no, my six-year-old needs a cell phone because I need to be able to find him or something. Yeah. Whatever. No, I'm terrified, man. Because I can't remember how long we waited with our girls, but... I got a phone... I think teenage.

I got a phone when I got a car. Okay, I think our girls might have been 13. But it was also a way... I mean, this is a Nokia 5150. Right, no. It was, you know... It's the world of the iPhone. I had Snake or whatever on there.

But now they even have... He probably has a Play iPad or a phone or something similar. He doesn't, but she has like a, yeah, she has like a tablet. It's not connected to the internet. But you know, it has like ABC mouse on it and a couple of other.

But it's grooming you. It's getting you ready for this is what you're going to be using. Yeah, and I've somewhat given up the ghost on that a little bit because that's just what you're going to be using. Yeah, and I've somewhat given up the ghost on that a little bit because that's just what you're going to use for work going forward. Yeah. And school.

And school. So on one hand, you're like, oh, okay, I don't want my kid having this thing in its hand all the time. On the other, you're like, well, they're going to have it in their hand for the rest of their life. Well, that's why you've got to get her a VR headset now. I'm not going to lie to you, dude. She'll be wearing one of those.

That terrifies me. Or the, is it Google or Apple? Who has the thing people are walking around and they're. It's Apple, the Vision Quest thing. Yeah. Not Vision Quest. That's from, that's South Park. People are putting out videos of, I don't remember, how they're on the subway.

The Apple Vision thing. Opening, they got five windows open and they're doing this and that it feels like we're not that far away from that being issued by your school yeah like when my one-year-old is in high school well they just issue him a headset they're just like just work on this all day in the same way, they just issue him a headset. They're just like, just work on this all day. In the same way that they issue, you know, a notebook,

you know, an Acer-type computer today. Because the cost will obviously inevitably come down. So I don't know. Yeah, my second daughter got, first one didn't fall into that, but the second one got a iPad or something. It wasn't an iPad. cool but it was a okay it was a school issued tablet

anyways ken paxton is suing porn hub okay cool that was kind of the start of that story uh uh a booking possibly for Blake as Matthew McConaughey has a new children's book. McConaughey, hey, hey. No. As done by Dr. Phil's son. We know. We know.

You guys should book him, Kelly. He does music. He lives in Texas. Would you want to come down to see Dr. Phil's son playing some tunes? No. Well, I will. So he read this book,

Did McConaughey, to children at St. Jude's Hospital earlier this month, and I gotta be honest, I feel like that's his lane. What? Like, I'm not saying he's a bad actor,

but was anybody ever created more to just read to children than Matthew McConaughey? Well, we've heard him doing Baby Longhorn. Baby Longhorn. Baby Longhorn. Oh, we've heard him doing Baby Longhorn. Baby Longhorn. I feel like whenever I,

and this kind of dovetails with something that we said tomorrow. Yeah. With like how cool my mom was about charity and stuff like that. I don't love bringing this up, but when I did used to, and I did not get a DUI, I did not have community service, but I used to go read to kids at a school,

I don't really feel like I have the affect for it. Yeah, you're too like – Kind of an asshole. In your face. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's calming. So soothing and just – University of Texas Longhorns. A great team to root for.

A great school to go to. A beautiful city. Colorado River weaves its way through there. It's the state's capital. This is just him, the outtakes, I think. Yeah. So enjoy baby Longhorn. And remember, hook them horns.

I mean. Boom, I think we got all that. I'm going to go to outro. Yeah. Hey. Just perfect. Yeah. Just perfect.

Like, that's AI kid reading. Yeah. Couldn't come up with anything better. Yeah, I think, you know what? I may actually have to do this for the baby boy. What? Buy the book. Buy the audio book.

Does your boy listen to audio books? Is that reading a book for him? Are you teaching him to read? Yeah, he's not blind, so I don't know if it counts or not. And then I know we talked about this earlier. I don't know if it counts or not. And then I know we talked about this earlier with Sarah and then with my supreme Maury Povich mistake about Jerry. We didn't talk to Sarah tomorrow?

That was today. No, things we did earlier today. I can't believe they're actually making Jerry take a paternity test. Again, I will believe it when I see it. I feel like they're going to somehow delay it like he'll never actually do it. But a judge did say he had to. Do you think she'll ever be featured on television at a Cowboys game? No.

But I think she wants a piece of that pie. Do you remember? Like, it's how many billion? Oh. Is he worth, 10? I mean, yeah. Who knows? Probably a lot more than what's listed.

Because there probably is a monetary reason. Like, oh, I just want to know who my dad is. Okay. But if dad is. Okay. But if he dies and his estate is split up, there's probably some kind of a law that says, yes, it's between your whatever children. I don't know. understand how insane it is that this person and her mother were featured on a reality television show about being

rich in Dallas. They were living in Highland Park. And the reason they're rich is because she had sex with Jerry Jones. Right. Because Jerry pays her a healthy stipend or whatever. And if you recall, I mainlined all nine of those episodes,

and everyone would ask them, like, where did you get your money? And they never had a good answer. You know. Trust. Which is true. We had some money left to us. But, like, she would never say how or why. Right.

And it feels like the sort of thing that probably a lot of people in Dallas have known about for a long time. And that, I think, is what Sarah's saying when she's like, there's probably a lot more. Well, that's. That a lot of people have known about for a long time. When the story first broke, how many did we hear from? At least one, if not two other. Pictures of her at her 16th birthday party with the brand new Range Rover. Yeah.

And then my last story here is also somewhat football related. We've talked about this a couple times. The Chiefs-aholic. The Kansas City Chiefs superfan. Do you know who this guy is? Like, if you – can you conjure up, he looks like this, okay? He wears like a wolf. Oh, okay.

Well, that doesn't make sense. Why is he a wolf? None. You'd rather him just kind of feather it up? Yeah. Yeah. So his name is Xavier Babadar. He would wear a werewolf costume to Chiefs games.

And he had a crazy, crazy situation towards the end of last season where on the way to a game, he committed multiple bank robberies. Whoa. And these were not his first bank robberies. Wait. Banks aren't open on Sunday. I think he was probably headed down on Saturday. You know, or headed up, whatever. But he was traveling to Kansas City. Well, yeah. But I think he hit a bank in Tulsa. Tulsa, Oklahoma. And he was at the Texans game that weekend.

So it's like, I need some money for the weekend? I don't know, but they say that he... He wasn't wearing the whole wolf thing, was he? I don't think so. At least seven states, hundreds of thousands of dollars in stolen cash, using it to gamble online, and then at casinos. So he was living...

Damn. He was living life. And while this was going on, they were still showing him on games. Like in his werewolf costume. He was sentenced yesterday up to 50 years without parole. Wow. However, the case is not done because, as you pointed out, Dan, you can always appeal.

Is that excessive? It feels like it. And this is his lawyer, okay? His lawyer yesterday afternoon out front at a courthouse. Like on the steps. Like it was perfect. On the steps. It was perfect.

Just walks out like it's the Supreme Court and really, really leans into the football theme. From the beginning of this case, folks, the government has been blitzing. Okay, well, I think you can see right there that we're already in for a bit of a ride. He looks like a lawyer. Oh, yeah, dork. This guy's never put a helmet on in his life. He Googled football terms.

How can I work these in? Yeah, he's like me with the golf book. Yeah, he doesn't know what any of this means. From the beginning of this case, folks, the government has been blitzing, and Xavier's pocket was collapsing. But today, Xavier stepped into the pressure. He took responsibility for his actions. He pled guilty okay he stood up in court humble

and repentant and admitted by the way as you pointed out earlier he does have a little bit of greg olson there repent repent he stood up in court, humble and repentant, and admitted what he had done. Now, if I know anything about Xavier, and if the Chief's Kingdom knows anything about Chief Zahalik, Do you think you're in good shape if your attorney starts referencing your fan name to the press and starts referencing Chiefs Kingdom? The good reputation that Chiefsaholic— The Chiefsaholic that you know. Right, but never. And if the Chiefs Kingdom knows anything about Chiefs-a-holic, we know

that he doesn't give up. We know that if he stumbled and he fell, he didn't let his knee touch the ground. There's more, but I feel like that is... I think we need to hear more.

So we need the instant replay. We're sending it upstairs for further review. We have... But I feel like that is... I think we need to hear more. So we need the instant replay. Right. We're sending it upstairs for further review. You rolled over the back of somebody. We have... Yeah. Step going. The call was against us, but we threw the red flag.

Right. And they're going to look at this back in New York. Indisputable. I'd like to bring in Mike Pereira. Mike. Yeah, Pereira. Blandino just Skypes in. Yeah.

This is just so contrived. His territory just agrees with the judge. I agree with you right there. Yeah. And he fell. He didn't let his knee touch the ground. And that's because he's capable of doing a great thing. And he knows that there's still hope.

We still have a lot of work to do on his case, but Xavier wants everyone to know that he loves the Chiefs' kingdom, he loves Kansas City, and he hopes that you'll rally to his support. What does that mean? Thank you and God bless. Yeah, I don't know. He pled guilty.

Yeah, what is it? You robbed ten banks. Yeah, I don't know. He pled guilty. Yeah, what is the people? You robbed ten banks. And you pled guilty. And now he's like, we just need Chief's Kingdom to rally to Chief Zahalik's support. That's great. Because he's being blitzed right now by an unruly district attorney who's coming off the edge. There's your news.

The Dumb Zone News. Why did you want to do that to me? Like and subscribe. Because somebody requested it earlier. I would never do that to you. You know what? Put this in our notes so that we separate this part. Because we do have, we have been, we've been having a little fun with the time shifting yesterday we recorded one that we're going to air friday the reason that we are airing

something different friday is because tomorrow it is no day off we will actually be recording our lawyers roundtable so all the lawyers who worked with us as we tried to fight that oppressive thumb of the man that was smushing us down. We, you know, I know a lot of people are interested in, you know, kind of hearing the story from their perspective and blow by blow and all that kind of stuff of the whole court case of last summer. The case of the century. That's what they're calling it some called it and they say

the 21st century yeah as a matter of fact so blake uh we do have a from what i understand the reddit page has put up a little thread and you could actually have some questions in there and And we'll kind of sift through that and see if any of them are worthy of posing to the lawyers tomorrow. But Blake has set something up as well in a new world that the olds like us have no idea about. Discord. Discord. And I don't want to pretend like I know anything. We just know a lot of people.

Because you were against it like two weeks ago. Yeah. You're like, oh, no, not another thing. I know. We do put a lot on his plate. No, that's not why. I agree with Jake that any time I've tried. I only say stuff like that so I can be mean to him later.

Yeah. I've tried to dabble in Discord before for different projects, and it just seems so overwhelming. Like there are so many what they call channels on the left side. there's just a million people just he's old now didn't somebody set up a channel for a thing for us and you said on that left side there's like a place to put your 9-11 memorial pictures yeah and so um i've discovered what's our thing called like how do i get see like I'm still... I still don't quite know yet.

Oh, okay. Maybe we shouldn't have done this today then. No, because there's a neat thing. So if you are a Patreon subscriber, you can somehow get to our Dumb Zone Discord. I'll tweet out a link. There are ways to get to it. But if you are a subscriber,

you do have access to the Dumb Zone Discord. And, and yeah there is a channel over here called 9-11 memorials where somebody says there's one in brickfield colorado that has a piece of a beam somehow sure but there are just different channels where our subscribers can chat and um one of them is called q&A. And so I ask people to put lawyer questions there, and we've gotten a lot of good ones here. But our Dumb Zone Discord is just a cool place for our subscribers to hang out and chat. And if you're a Discord person and you want to join, then we recommend it.

And maybe this is a tool that we use in the future where we could broadcast live on Discord or we could host amas or whatever but i think this will be something that we could utilize going forward and in this case if you have a question for the lawyers you can go to our dumb zone reddit or this dumb zone discord but we don't know how you get there we're working on how you get there type in no they built us a url that can share, but apparently it expires. This is so low rent.

Okay. Okay, but we're trying. I know. Jake, we're trying. I know. Rather than just say, ugh, no, we don't get it. We're trying. I got it.

Do we have a Snapchat? No. Myspace. We don't have a Snapchat? I thought for sure you would have set us up with that. Why? I don't know. Because you're on it.

Yeah. He's not on it for work, though, brother. Oh, okay. I see. For your wiener. The Dumb Zone presents Today in History. Because then whatever you send disappears, right? Supposed to.

I mean, whatever. The hard way. What happened to CyberDust? Remember that? Yeah, I do. There was a time where the cubes made me, if I wanted to book him, I had to use it. Really? Mm-hmm. I'm like, all right I had to use it. Really? Mm-hmm.

I'm like, all right, dude. Hey, why not? Got the job done. Yeah. It's a good thing he didn't tell you to do it through his Discord. No, I would have been lost. Yeah, absolutely befuddled. So today is Thursday, February 29th. The 29th.

I can't remember the last time I researched the 29th. Maybe it was four years ago. I bet, yeah. So, what has happened on this day? Certainly not that many things, but on this day in 1504, Christopher Columbus, he was stranded in Jamaica during his fourth voyage to the West. He frightened, frightened...

Why'd you say it like that? Hostile natives into providing food for his crew by correctly predicting a lunar eclipse. Damn. That's quite the trick. You might be able to do something with your daughter. Like, if you don't listen, if you don't clean your room, I'm going to black out the sun. Yeah. I'm like, all right.

Come outside, hon. It's 2 o'clock in the afternoon. It's dark. Right. She'll just think I'm God. Right., come outside, hon. It's 2 o'clock in the afternoon. It's dark. Right. She'll just think I'm God. Right. That's not a bad idea. On April 8th, right?

This day in 1940, Hattie McDaniel became the first black actor to win an Academy Award. The best supporting actress for Gone with the Wind. Tough scene. I was thinking they did this on purpose on February 29th, so they wouldn't have to celebrate it that often. But why are you saying it's a tough scene? Well, wasn't she banned from the ceremony? Oh.

Like she wasn't allowed in the building. You're telling me in 1940. Which is weird, too, because it's like, then why'd you give her the award? Like to do one and not the other just seemed, it always seemed like an odd quirk of history to me. But yeah, she was not allowed in, it might have been like the Beverly Hills Hotel or something. Something like that. But she was not allowed to receive her award. Despite all the libs in Hollywood?

Yeah, well. On this day in 1960, the first Playboy Club opened, featuring waitresses in bunny outfits. It opened in Chicago. Didn't we have one here once upon a time? I don't know. I mean, it's way before my time, but I feel like we had one in like the 80s. Okay, here's something interesting that I was looking at this morning.

This day 42 years ago, 1980. Wait, 44 years ago that would be. You were close. My point really is it's this day in 1980. Gordie Howe. So a couple interesting things happened on this day. Number one, it was the St. Louis Blues' 1,000th regular season game. So that's barely interesting, though.

Even barely is a little bit more than I would. I only bring that up just to say there's actually something way more interesting. So Gordie Howe scored a goal. That put him, so that's somewhat interesting as well. It made him the first NHL player to ever have 800 career goals. That gets super interesting, right? What if I told you, though, and this is an NHL game. Isn't like the rival league that popped up or whatever.

This is the NHL. He was 51 years old. Who did I see the other day? Isn't like Albert Bell? Is Albert Bell dead? No. I saw somebody the other day that's still playing at like 56. But as you said, not at like the highest level.

Is it Manny? It might be Manny. I think Manny Ramirez might be out there. I know Julio Franco played. Played until he was definitely mid-50s. But yeah, that is insane. Not in majors though. That year, Gordie Howe played 80 games, scored 15 goals, and had 26 assists at the age of 51.

Ridiculous. No helmet. Did I pay off on that being interesting? It got better. Thanks, man. It got better. On this day in 1996, Daniel Green convicted in North Carolina, he murdered James R. Jordan. No comment.

The father of Michael Jordan during a 1993 roadside holdup. He was sentenced to life in prison. You feel that that's all there is there? Nothing else to see? The NBA sent him. Maybe some questions about Jordan's gambling debts. Now, this day in 2016, Justice Clarence Thomas posed some questions during a Supreme Court oral argument

dealing with gun rights. And the only reason I guess this is notable, it says, those questions he posed, that broke 10 years of courtroom silence for him. Apparently, he's just chilling. That's awesome. Just show up and be like, I don't know. What are you guys doing?

All right. Has anyone ever talked about that? I did not know that. Like, you know, my thought that I don't feel like a lifetime contract should ever be with anything. Certainly marriage, if anything, maybe. But you do. You are a different person. You get married at 20.

You're way different. You get married at 30. You're going to be way different at 50. And you're just going to hope that we kind of stay on the same path because we were kind of similar, you know, many years ago. And even if you don't, you might be like, it's just too much of a beating to get out of it. Yeah, I've got to pay a lawyer.

These kids are going to be depressed. But who decided that... Why would the Supreme Court be a lifetime appointment? Do you feel like that's ridiculous? I mean, I do think it's ridiculous, but I also obviously see the logic in it, which is that they don't want them to be subject to the whims of elections. Yet they now seem to be in a way.

Yeah, but you know what I'm saying, though, is that they're not constantly having to campaign. You know the fact that that's how it works at a county level, right? Yeah. And that you've got to make this decision for this person or that person because they lined your pocket or whatever. Can I sell you on 10 years, 15? I don't know. I think there's probably a middle ground somewhere.

Yeah. Yeah. Maybe a, yeah, just some kind of a number that wouldn't end necessarily with a, I don't know. But we're not going to change it, are we? We're not going to change it are we we're not going to change anything ever yeah but also i think it's awesome that clarence thomas was able to just show up at work for a solid 10 years and be like i am not opening my mouth today don't want to do

anything i'll be in the break room if you guys need me i'll vote it's going to be about it birthdays today we have a hero actually. That's a hero, actually. We've already mentioned Jordan Reiner. Yes. Leap year birthdays. Monty Kiffin is 84. Were those fun days? What a strange, strange era. I mean, it was one year, right?

Maybe two. Cowboys defensive coordinator for one year, 2013. So weird. Former Cowboy John Nyland is 80. He was the first-round pick in 1966. Was a guard for a decade. Tyrese Halliburton is 24. Dude, Hallie is the future.

Tony Robbins is 61. Always wanted to go. And Ja Rule. Where is Ja? Is 50, excuse me, 45. Find out what Ja thinks about this. I end with... I don't want to dance.

I'm scared to death. Allow me to end with, for today's birthday, Jack Lausma. Jack Lausma is 85. He is a former astronaut. And next, as I kind of searched his name this morning and looked at his Wikipedia page, it indicated he is in the United States Astronaut Hall of Fame. What do they have, like, do you have to have goose get up there? So I looked into that.

Pound the table for you. Isn't just going to space enough to be in the Astronaut Hall of Fame? Well, let's take a look at the Astronaut Hall of Fame, shall we? He's just been waiting to play this. What is the Astronaut Hall of Fame, you ask? No one did. I'm glad you were wondering about that because I was myself earlier today, but now I'm your guy. So, yeah, there's a U.S. Astronaut Hall of Fame.

How did the U.S. Astronaut Hall of Fame even come to be? Well, it says here. He had to leave his house really early. So, like, the 30 minutes he had for the show was dedicated to this. To this. So, the Mercury 7 was a group of seven astronauts selected to fly spacecraft for Project Mercury. It was the original group of astronauts. They may

call them the original seven or astronaut group one, but they're commonly referred to as the Mercury Seven, okay? Did they retire their numbers? Well, here's what's really interesting here. Who would you rather meet, the Texas Seven or the Mercury Seven? I think you know.

So in the 1980s, the six surviving members, because that was way back in the whatever, 50s or 60s or some garbage, the six surviving members in the 80s thought up the idea. You don't get to just create your own Hall of Fame. Of the Astronaut Hall of Fame. No, no, no, no, no. Hey, launching this weekend, the Dumb Zone Hall of Fame.

The inaugural class. We will have four inductees. Michael Copeland. Once they figured this all out and had the first ever class of inductees in 1990, they inducted the Mercury 7. class of inductees in 1990? They inducted the Mercury 7. That was the inaugural class. You know what would have been a lot funnier? Is if only four of them got in.

They invented the Hall of Fame so that they could be honored in the Astronaut Hall of Fame. The inaugural class, yeah. I feel like you have to have a lot of respect for that. I mean, I do. It just seems incredibly shameless for somebody who's a brilliant scientist who's been to space. Do you really need that?

You know, you might have forgot about us. Today we are launching the TexanAthens.com Hall of Fame. Everybody, though, in 1980, you're like, oh, everybody's into the BGs and the... What? I'm just saying, what are you bitching about in 1980? Everybody cares. Oh, you think those hostages in Iran are...

Everybody's forgetting about what we did. Okay. What if we start... Shouldn't there be a Hall of Fame to honor us? I think there should be. Do you second that motion? Here, here, you know, and then they hit a gavel, and then they convince people, they get donors, and they say, well, who should be the first?

Well, I don't know. I mean, I don't want to say it should be us, but I mean, who went up for – maybe it should be that. I mean, who went into space first? No? I mean, if you've done something better, that's cool. Yeah. I guess you risked your life.

Yeah, that's quite pretentious. Anyway. And that was today's mystery. Are you upset that I spent my half hour of free time this morning on that? Where is it? Oh, wait. What are we doing? We're still playing the song.

Where is the Hall of Fame? Do they have a physical location? Is it next to an Orange Julius like the hockey one? Oh. Don't we need to go? In the mall? Yeah. Get some orange chicken.

Well, I'd like to thank Kelly and Camille And the Texans The Texan Yes the Texan And the Texans And the food Catered by Smokey B Barbecue In Athens, Texas That's right

The great Athens, Texas Home of Jake's next wedding There's no doubt I'd like to thank Michael Copeland And perhaps Perhaps at this point You could see it Right across the screen That it says Michael Copeland. And perhaps at this point, you could see it right across the screen that it

says Michael Copeland or CopelandProductions.com. Oh, okay. Yeah. The girls love Michael Copeland. How could they not? And they should. And closing remarks. Anybody? Oh, okay.

We got a space is super gay. I should be in the astronaut hall. You love that that's following you around? Oh, now you're going to embrace it. Yeah, I don't care anymore. Adios, mofo. What does Blake do? What does Blake do?

What does Blake do? What would you say? What is Blake do? You do here. What is Blake do? What would you say? You do here. What is Blake do?

You do here. What would you say? What is Blake do? What is Blake do?