The Dumb Zone FREE - The Dumb Zone 3-4-24

Episode Date: March 4, 2024

We thought Jerry wouldn't speak until this whole paternity test thing went away... We thought wrong. Also, we found out the one sex term Jake can't stand(00:00) - Open (34:29) - Viewer Mail (45:08) - Jerry finally speaks (01:41:46) - News (01:53:33) - Today in History ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Hello, I'm Dan McDowell, longtime professional broadcaster. Why subscribe to our Patreon podcast? Well, perhaps you support our struggle to get out from under the oppressive thumb of the man. Or, objectively, if you sign up at patreon.com slash the dumb zone, you'll get the two episodes per week that are available on all podcast platforms, like this one, plus an additional two episodes each week that are exclusive to Patreon. So subscribing on Patreon gets you four episodes per week.

Oh my, what a bargain. Now, on to today's program. Do not come. Do not come. I'm gonna come. Do not come. I'm going to come. Oh. All right, all right, all right, all right, all right. That was my request.

All right, all right, all right, all right, all right. I never listen. What was that? I'm going to listen. I want to listen to the drums Well, that's the current vice president and the former president having a conversation. Yeah, it was on Zoom.

I'm gonna listen I wanna listen No, actually, Blake, that was edited. If you thought that Kamala Harris and Donald Trump were having sex and he was in front of a crowd. Right.

Anyway, happy Monday, guys. What a weekend. I don't know. Seven. Seven straight, baby. And how many before you got there? Seven what? Titles.

Why didn't you tell us? I just told you. Why didn't you tell us the natty was coming up? I don't know. What, are we going to come out? Yeah. We have before. I have.

Yeah. I don't think Blake has ever supported you in anything you've done outside this. But, yeah. No losses, baby. Scores? Closer than I would have liked. They seem to be getting closer. Yeah.

They're nipping at our heels a little bit. Well, it's because they've got to team up to beat you. You like the Warriors? And you get everybody's best shot. I'm a little older. You know, that because they've got to team up to beat you. You're like the Warriors. And you get everybody's best shot. I'm a little older. You know, that's kind of the annoying part. Mm-hmm. Hey, let's let everybody know, turn on Ethan's mic.

Right here is, we have a 690 sit-in today. He is Ethan. Do you want to give your last name or no? Sure. Stanfield. Like Marlo. Yeah. Lakeith.

Good problems. No. I like Lakeith. I think. Like Marlo. Yeah. Lakeith. Good problems. No, uh... I like Lakeith. I think you just... Yeah. Yeah, it's also Lakeith, but... Who's Marlo Stanfield? Oh, he's from Atlanta or something? Lakeith is from Atlanta. Oh, okay. The Wire. I feel like you just pulled a

beating long... I'm getting my black guys confused. I'm sorry. Jake situation. But yeah, no. It was closer than I would have liked, Dan, but we got it done. So from what I understand, Ethan's claim to fame is he made the website. Day1DF.com. Day1DF.com.

Now, is the one a numeral, or do you type out? In fact, it is the spelling O-N-E. Okay. That's important. Can you grow a beard? I shaved this morning. I was going to say because your face is just incredibly, incredibly clean. No.

I can hear it a little bit. You get up close to it on that hug? You'll get a welcome hug from Jake. Did we rub cheeks? I don't remember. I'm a hugger. He is. I'm a drugger. I love it. Day1DF.com

That is how you can determine your subscriber number. Yes. It's a little more streamlined than an open Google Doc where there are 100 people typing at the same time. When you sent that out, I was shocked because there was 400 people trying to get their numbers in. Well, we don't know what we're doing.

But Ethan saved us. Yeah. See, that's the way we are getting better at things by we do something, we totally screw it up, and then someone contacts us and says, hey, I can do this, and then they do it better. And it's like, okay. Crowdsourcing. They're iterating.

That's what we say in the software biz. Boy, we've got to remember that. Iterating. Iterating. I guess I've never thought of that. I thought reiterate was the only way you'd ever use the word. Not to go back to my successes yesterday too much. Oh, he wasn't done.

Back to... I did something yesterday that I've never done before, which is... Pick? Pick six? No. Not talk trash? There wasn't a ton.

A penalty-free game? I got one. Every game he gets one. That's impossible for you not to get a penalty. On the way home, I bought two bags of ice and put them in my bathtub and just took the full cold.

I just filled it with cold water and just sat in there as long as I could. I really think it helped. Helped what? I don't know if it's recovery. Inflammation or just... Obviously, there's a reason athletes do... Not that I'm an athlete, but that people do cold tubs or whatever, but I actually think it helped. You're less sore?

I think so. I think so. Because when I got home yesterday, I don't even know how we used to do, like when Blake and I used to play together, sometimes we would play three games in a day. Oh, I would leave your flag football to go play three games of softball. Yeah, and you're just like, how do your legs do this? And we played two, and I felt like I was going to die. Like I got home, and I just literally felt as if I couldn't walk.

I couldn't move. And it was worse than last year. I mean, you play two every year in playoffs, right? Yeah. Yeah, I can notice that it's getting worse by year. Yeah, it's definitely getting worse by day. Well, the two of you leave it all out there, right? I mean, you're not...

Jake does. I'll coast on you. He doesn't need, but he can. See, this is something you need to learn. He can park one at 350. In my portion of the Belichick book, their most recent Super Bowl win is against the Eagles, the first time they played the Eagles.

And they were saying by then, maybe that was their third Super Bowl win. I can't recall. The point is they were like, they thought in retrospect the Eagles went too hard, too fast, weren't pacing themselves through the game, couldn't leave anything for the fourth quarter, that kind of thing. So you're just like young Jordan or LeBron.

You're learning. You're Donovan McNabb. Yeah. Right. Also did vomit. Yeah, checks out. Donovan McNabb-wise. But, yeah, yeah. Very similar. Donovan McNabb-wise. But, yeah.

The homemade cold tub. The Joe Rogan. The Joe Rogan. The Papa Joe. And how long do you stay in? Do you pop out and grab a shower after? Yes. Okay.

It was not more than, I would say, six or seven minutes. But I think it helped Okay As long as you think that I'm not going to try it I fear cold I can't do it I'm no Wim Hof

Are you still doing that? Wim Hof? Yeah, mostly See I can't do it I do it in doing that? Wim Hof? Yeah, mostly. See, I can't do it. I do it in the summer some. The cold shower? Yeah.

Yeah. In the winter, I just... I can't. He's not just about the cold. He's also about the breath. Yeah, no. I stop at the cold shower. What'd you guys do? I'm going to work backwards.

Sunday night, I watched the new show... What did you guys do? I'm going to work backwards. Sunday night, I watched the new show Shogun. You guys heard about this? I've been hearing all about it. Why do you pronounce it like that? Because I think you're supposed to. Shogun. It's not Shogun?

No, because I think I said that, and then in the show they said Shogun. Oh, okay. I've always seen that. You notice I'm sitting this one out because I think I said that, and then in the show they said Shogun. Oh, okay. I've always seen that. You notice I'm sitting this one out because I have absolutely no idea. I've just seen that word forever. You're the same. And Shogun. I said Shogun last week, but then as I watched the show, they said Shogun.

Shogun. Okay. Now I seem educated like Ethan. You know, I actually have thought, I think you guys, you're a comedy, a sports, and an educational podcast. There's three categories happening here. We do learn. We do a lot of learning.

Just street learning though, not book learning. It's supposed to be the next Game of Thrones and so I thought I'd try to get in early and I think there are two episodes out now

and I watched episode one. Okay, I'm glad because I was thinking about jumping in. Yeah, it's... Me and the lady are looking for something to watch. I'm going to butcher all this because I don't know Japanese history,

but they're like, King dies and then there are five families that are trying to get the throne. And so it's a throne-chasing show in Japan. What's it on? FX. Okay.

So Hulu as well. Hulu. Not as risque as Game of Thrones then. There was some nudity and a beheading. On FX? Yeah. It's real easy to record through YouTube TV. I don't know.

I missed that cultural impact show. Feels like it's waning. Yeah. And so, I don't know. The scores were really good and I thought I'd get in. And I think that's also why

since you missed that cultural impact show, you were so into Succession when it was on. Was that one? Oh, yeah. We were all watching it. We were talking about it nonstop. And yet you... And we were like, you know what would be really cool?

Like a guest from Succession. Yeah. Like, everybody's talking about it. That would be really timely. To be fair, we did get Coral. At the very end of the whole series. After badgering him. Over and... We got the 11th most popular. at the very end of the whole series after badgering him over and it was like reluctantly

the 11th most popular right I will book this guy it was probably the easiest guess you could have booked but how did you get to the Sopranos party for me it was through Bob and Dan because I watched it way late because that was an early... Oh, you mean like...

That was season one. They were actually at the HBO thing? Why would they need to promote Succession if it's the most popular show going? Well, I don't know. I mean, as The Wire was going, we would just get guys on throughout the whole... We had Bodie one year.

We had Bubz. We had Marlo. It's weird, too, because... We had... Who's the big one? Michael K. Williams? Yeah. No, no. We had himlo. It's weird, too, because... We had... Who's the big one? Michael K. Williams? Yeah. No, no.

We had him, but he's now a really big, famous actor. Michael B. Jordan. Not him. Who's the drug kingpin? He took over from Marlo. He's on another couple other famous shows. He's black. He's from The Wire.

Okay, I'll figure it out. I never watched The Wire. I don't know why you... Because I think you're getting your order of operations incorrectly. Marlo took over last. You're thinking of the guy who's also in... Stringer! Okay, yeah.

Oh, Idris Elba. Idris Elba? Yeah. The new Bond. Oh, we've had Stringer Bell. Idris Elba. Idris Elba? Yeah. Yeah. The new Bond. But Marlo takes from him. Oh, he does? Yeah.

I thought... Marlo's the young kid. Okay, my bad. Who gets a... It's been a while. The point is, we had like 10 guests on from that show while it was a very popular show. And I think the other point, too, that Blake is making is, you know,

why would they want to promote it? That's why you never see commercials for McDonald's or Coca-Cola. Oh, that's true. They're already so popular. They have new products, and they have an advertising budget. What's in it for the actor? Anyway, Shogun. You enjoying this?

Yeah, the nut-kicking just Fascinating to watch up front And he's just staring Straight at Yeah I can't pick one Because I'm fighting both of them I gotta keep them in my peripheral Yeah it's constant Sunday morning softball

Didn't go so well Oh no The Red Sox No They're the Indians Oh that's right Indian fever They don't care about your PC

No The world mind virus You're trying to infiltrate us with. Don't know that term. The team hat is a Chief Wahoo hat. Excellent. The Indian fever didn't help pump you up? No. We should play that before every game, shouldn't we?

That's the problem. And then, let's see. Okay, so Friday night, I'm going in reverse. Wife and I went to Hyena's in Fort Worth to see Chris Farley's brother. Oh, yes. Is it two plus one? In together. Is he from something?

I don't know. There was a show on MTV many, many moons ago where they put together like a fake boy band. And he was part of it. I think it was called In Together or In Together Now or something like that. Okay. Yeah. And it's clear that he's Chris Farley's brother. Yeah, I think I've seen him before.

He's pretty funny too. Yeah, not bad. He looks exactly like him. I haven't seen him in comedy Like doing stand up I don't know where I've seen him How'd you like it? He's okay Kind of feel like he's just

Coattailing Chris Farley But he's got like the same Facial expressions I mean why not He's fine He's what you got I know but I don't know

I think we And I discussed this with my wife We've set the bar so high to where the past few times we've gone to see comedy, it's been Akash. And I think I went to go see T.J. Miller. And so,

I don't think he's up to that standard, but it was fine. And we went to see... Kevin James. Kevin James. He's even set the bar even higher. But even like Kevin James, his brother opened for him,

and he was horrible. He was all right. It was not good. A nepo comedian. But even like Kevin James, his brother opened for him and he was horrible. He's all right. It was not good. Nepo comedian action. But it did seem like you must be Kevin James' brother. Yeah. Gary Valentine is not good.

I just hope you'll let us open for you someday. Yeah. And you're 45%. When you're doing your special. Let's start with that 15 minutes. It was supposed to be a punishment i know five minutes is not a punishment um okay and then before that though we went to uh my wife's aunt's birthday

party who turned 80 good lord and she had her party at a honky tonk in fort Worth. Billy Bob's? Guitars and Cadillacs. Guitars and Cadillacs. And much like I reported a week ago about the bumper sticker that I saw on Wichita Falls that said I eat milf and cookies. A guy was walking around with the plus sign for a donor. It's just like

a plus sign. His said orgasm donor is just like a plus sign. Okay. His said, orgasm donor. Mm-hmm. I like that. From the makers of Female Body Inspector. And I thought that was really funny. He was just walking around in that. But then I ran into the bathroom attendant

that I did not know was still a thing because no one carries cash. Yeah, no cash. And I would think the really high toned hotel or restaurant yeah strip club has them for sure oh i didn't know that yeah i mean i think i'm not as you know not big strip club guy but i'm pretty sure strip club you're going to be able to buy like mouthwash really yeah okay or whatever what do you think about Like they have a You ever been in one

That has a thing Full of combs? Oh yeah In like the Disinfectant or something I just thought That was really weird Yeah he has

I was needing a comb Yeah I'm so glad Barbasol Well you didn't grow up In an era So we're Close to eras But we always have

Different things That are a little different And I think You would not have been In this era, some olds will remember, if you had a – it was a long comb that would stick out of the back of your pocket. It had a handle. Yeah. Did you?

No, but I definitely knew. Okay, that was an era where we would go to school and everybody had a comb sticking out of the back of their pocket, just in case you need to comb your hair. Yeah. And I was... You rolled up cigarettes? I had one.

You were dance fighting? You had one? I had a comb, sure. That's awesome. I was trying to feather my hair. I remember it was like Mark something had the best feathered hair. It was like a dude. And I would just look at his hair every day like,

man, I wish I could part my hair in the middle and feather it like that. Yeah, I remember them doing that in Greece. But didn't they have like a lot of hair product in? Yeah, but I didn't live in a... Well, I suppose some people did hair product, but I was just trying to feather it perfectly. Okay. Which sounds as gay as it is.

So did he offer you a mint? Yeah, so he had just the most high highbrow hand soap hand you a towel right i really tried to avoid him i mean he was posted up like in the corner where you like the first uh sink and i went around him over here and which he knew he knew i don't have cash i don't have cash i don't need your tic tacs i don't need gum i don't need you to hand me a paper towel i want you to leave me alone. And so, yeah, I avoided him like the plague. He didn't have like a little Venmo scan?

I didn't know. I didn't look. I'm pretty sure I've actually seen that. Okay, because that's another uncomfortable level if it's a... Yeah. Not a white person. Pick a minority, I'm just saying. It just seems a little weird. When you're in a place that is generally a white person. Pick a minority, I'm just saying. It just seems a little weird.

When you're in a place that is generally a white place, but then it's a... Honky-tonk. Yeah. Here's the one guy that isn't white in here and is here to serve you. This is a little bit of a different dynamic, but I just thought of something I forgot to tell you guys about when I was in Mexico. I got a massage on the beach. Wow. I mean, it was like $25.

Dude? I had, yeah. Okay. But like the fact that, you know how there's like the trinket people? Yeah. That are like ever present in Mexico. The little kids.

Sometimes their children. Selling chiclets. Anything. Putting an iguana on your shoulder. The little kids. Sometimes their children. Chick-fil-A. Selling chicklets. Anything. Putting a iguana on your shoulder. Yeah, exactly. But just being bum-rushed by a person who's not white and then being like, yes, I will now allow you

to service me for $25 or $30. I've never felt uncomfortable with the pedicure like Dan does. I think it's akin to you to the shoeshine. I've always thought. Which I just don't. There'd be the shoeshine guy at the airport.

Airport, yeah, and he's usually not white. Right. And I'd probably never go to any shoeshine guy, but I'm absolutely not going to a non-white shoeshine guy. It just feels really rough. A black guy rubbing your feet at the airport. It can happen.

A Vietnamese woman tending to your warts or whatever is nuts. At least that's in a business. At the airport, any manner of people can just see you. It did feel a little bit weird to be like yes

rub me boy and then I was like yes Mexican boy was he a a man like a

your age type thing younger than me not just a kid was not a kid but he was definitely not like you know he was probably 25 was it couples yeah but the weird thing about it was not a kid but he was definitely not like you know he was probably 25 was it couples yeah but the weird thing about it was we both did it but they were like you know i don't know if

you've ever done like a couple's massage before but typically the way it goes like if you're at like a resort or something is like you go into like the the actual spa and they're playing like Enya. This is not that. There were like eight people just like in a row under these tents. So it wasn't really... Oh, you went to their tent? Yeah. Okay, they weren't walking around. Well, they were walking down to the beach when you were walking by

and they were like, you want to come up here? Okay. And so we did that. It wasn't intimate. It was not intimate at all. Did you know what he was doing? You know, it was fine. He's no Gary. I mean, there's one Gary. I think about Gary all the time.

Again, it was like $30. It was $25, $30. It was not. You got what you paid for. But it was funny to listen to like, there were a couple of other people there, as I've told you, from Canada. Who were really, really mean. To massage guys? Yeah, or ladies.

Oh. Just overly, like, no more of that. That's not the Canadian way. I learned a lot about the Canadian way. They can be a little more demanding than you think. But yeah, the bathroom attendant's still out there. I was surprised. Besides

our big business meeting that we had on Saturday, actually, Jake hosted. Shout out to Weinberger. That's right. Weinberg wine burgers good dudes over there huge huge p or whatever we are well i know they were p1s when we were on the ticket i'm not sure if they subscribe or whatever now but we do get recognized and i'm always really surprised that they have a sandwich up printed on the board and it's been up there

for years called a pugs and kelly do you know who that is blake uh i guess not pugs and kelly were a radio show in dallas 15 20 at least 15. Years ago? Yeah. And they were on 105.3. Were they the talk that rocks at that point? Something. Yeah, and I think they moved around a couple times. Pugs and Kelly did. Yeah, it was just your basic variety type general talk.

I can't remember if they were on against Bob and Dan or against the Hardline. At one point, I'm almost certain they were on against Bob and Dan or against the Hardline. At one point, I'm almost certain they were on against you guys. Okay. But they, you know. Yeah. They were fine. I think maybe they were before Russ Martin or something.

Yeah. Like they led into him. And, you know, not really a big ratings threat or anything as I recall. But they were out there. It was guy talk or something. And that's just why it always seems odd to me every time I go to Weinberger's. Yeah, they have... Where's the Dan McDowell? The scoreboard is...

They have two sandwiches named after local luminaries. One of them is Pugs and Kelly, and the other one is Mark Cuban. Which makes sense. Yeah, that's a layup. So it does always print a bit weird, the disparity between. Is the Pugs and Kelly sandwich more popular than Pugs and Kelly now? Boy, that's a good question. Got to be.

Surely. Where are Pugs and Kelly these days? I actually think they filled in recently on The Freak. Okay, but they're not. And that sounded like a punchline, but it wasn't. I don't think they have a full-time show anywhere. Okay. Well, that means they probably have a podcast.

Yeah, it probably does. They're right next to us. Yep. Yeah, besides the big meeting that Blake joined from a kid's birthday party. Yeah, sorry. It wasn't your kid. No, I'm saying I'm crediting you. Like, I can't believe.

The fact that you even popped in for. Jake was like, don't even call him. Let him have a day off. I was like, yeah, I need some questions answered, though, that Blake can answer. Yeah, I just popped a headphone in and just allowed me to hang at the edge there were the exterior of the party which i didn't mind it wasn't your kid no okay it was just friend or whatever no but too much credit no but any anytime you can get a kid in a bounce house and playing with other kids i mean that buys you a pretty good nap during the day. Oh, yeah.

So besides that, which we, again, inched forward, we're moving forward. We're going at our own pace. In fact, we have a big business meeting today. Mm-hmm. We have to, so one hour and 45 minutes from now is our limit. We have a hard out. We have to hit the road, head to Dallas. The big city. Oh yeah, but

I was just going to tell you the one thing, since you mentioned a TV show you started watching, I finally watched... Oh, I'm sorry. Go ahead. Go ahead. That reminded me of something. It was your birthday this weekend. We'll get to that. I'll watch something for you. Office Space. Wow. Pretty good. Okay.

All right. It was a very enjoyable watch. Yes. Michael Bolton, funny. Peter, a little weird. I don't know if it was the hypnosis or what, but he just kind of seemed spaced out the whole time. Peter, what's happening? His wife left him.

It is the hypnosis. Yeah. That's the whole point. Okay. The point is he remained hypnotized because the guy had a heart attack during the middle of it. He never clapped him out of it. Yeah.

Okay. All right. That's like the main plot point. Well, yeah. Or a pretty important... It changed his whole attitude. Yeah. Yeah, it's what... Yeah, he was not that guy before.

He's in the middle of being hypnotized, and then he's like, you know, when I clap, you'll be out of this. That's why he's able to talk to the bobs the way that he does. Yeah.

He just doesn't care. Okay. I guess I just didn't remember enough of the movie before then to say like, oh, there's a big change in character here. Yeah. He just doesn't care. Okay. I guess I just didn't remember enough of the movie before then to say like, oh, there's a big change in character here. Okay.

But I just thought the whole movie was like the three of them was the three of us, which I thought was cool. I would be Samir. They're idiots. Yeah.

They're trying to figure stuff out and they don't do it right. Yeah, just, you know, fighting the man and yeah, nothing goes right and hopefully at the end it all works out.

In fact, we've had, what is it, McGinley? What's his name? John C. McGinley? Yes. One of the Bobs. We've had him as a guest. Okay. You know why?

Because we just liked that movie, and we're like, hey, we should book somebody for the movie. You know, you also had O-Face on. Oh, the O-Face guy. Drew? The waiter? Not the waiter. No, no O-Face guy. Drew? The waiter? Not the waiter. No, no, not the waiter.

The guy in the office. Uh-huh. Blonde hair. Yeah, but them beating up the copier I think was my favorite part. Did you hear quotes that you've heard forever? You're like, oh, that's where that comes from. I mean, several, yeah, gifs and memes. Yeah. The case of the Mondays, I i knew was from that michael bolton we've had her on but it was just a lucky chance she was walking through the uh the ticket offices one day

i recall that actually and someone was like hey that's she's the girl that they were whispering she's the girl that was an officer in let's! Let's go. Let's talk. You know, the character from that movie that I think it's mentioned the least is they had the Sprite guy sell in the magazines. Or is it 7-Up? Oh, Orlando Jones? Yeah. He was Clifford Franklin in The Replacements.

What am I going to do with 48 subscriptions to Vibe? Yeah. That guy's in that movie for like 15 seconds. Yeah. The crackhead. Yeah. subscriptions to Vi. That guy's in that movie for like 15 seconds. The crackhead. Yeah. And then it, yeah,

it was filmed at 635 on the doorway. We've had Lumberg. I think you did have Lumberg. That's right. Wow. Okay. Yes, and I told you you're gonna,

in fact, you made fun of me last week when I'm like, hey, there's some scenes filmed in here. It's cool to see. I really did and I rewound it.

Oh my God, it's Preston Road. I've been right there. Yeah. Traffic is bad there. It's funny to see. I really did and I rewound it. Oh my god, it's Preston Road. I've been right there. Yeah. Traffic is bad there. It's funny too because I used to have a buddy who worked like right there and he hated his job and his entire existence was just exactly like that movie.

And like I'd go have lunch with him or whatever and it's just like, boy, this specific little part of town just feels like i hate my job yeah you know who else we've had is uh mike judge that's true to talk about that and other things see i think part of this too was the gbl part of it because we like the old face guy we're never booking the old face guy out of nowhere but he was on the gbl list so it's like all right are you sure i think he was on the gbl list but i'm not sure i have a lot of false memories as you know well thank you blake i'm sorry

yeah i just thought that's great no i was just gonna tell you real quick i think the movie i watched it was kind of viral. It was well-known a couple months ago, but it was Leave the World Behind on Netflix. Julia Roberts. Oh, come on. That's it? You just got to say Julia Roberts?

I'm not a huge fan. I thought she was possibly the weakest link of the movie, but I thought overall, good movie. I saw that. Did you? Yeah, where they go to the house in the Hamptons or whatever. The little girl likes friends. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

There's a sales pitch for you, Blake. I like Ethan Hawke. The little girl likes friends. Ethan Hawke and Kevin Bacon, which are kind of the same person sometimes. That's a good point, actually. I never thought of that. Very similar.

Yeah. Did you like the ending? I loved the ending. Yeah, it was good. I thought it was a very good ending. It wrapped it up? But yeah, so if you have some time to kill and you want to watch that, I would say that it is worth it. I watched a decent amount of

SNL. Okay, I didn't watch any this week. With Sidney? Yeah. I don't know. Was she funny at all? I did not think so. Okay. I mean, obviously she's on there because of her giant jugs and all that.

Which are great. I think somebody's made the point. I don't want anybody thinking I'm not on board with giant jugs. Yeah, you know, I think it's actually disrespectful to real giant jugs. It's really more that she's just extremely willing to show them off. I feel like the real heavies are getting disrespected by the fact that... Do you think they're fake? No, they're definitely not fake.

Oh. Because she's actually told that story before about, like, did you ever know a girl? I knew a girl in high school who eventually got, like, a breast reduction a la Superbad. Slapping God in the face. That's right. Yeah.

Yeah. And that she told her mom in high school that she wanted to do it, and her mom was like, don't. Just wait. Because you're going to need this. It's not going to hurt. Yeah. Yeah.

But I think it's mostly just that she's. Although, remember, we've had a discussion. There is too hot. Where it actually does hurt if you just want to be taken seriously. Blah, blah, blah. That stuff that you hear girls say. It probably depends on your field. And you've always, I mean, as a misogynist, had that opinion.

But, you know, you and I have both talked before about occasionally, like you'll have like a really attractive female doctor or dentist or something. You're like, okay, well, it's not like it's impossible. True. dentist or something, you're like, okay, well, it's not like it's impossible. True. But I also think being a doctor or a dentist and a lady, whatever your number is, and I don't like to label ladies, but let's say it's a five, she shoots up to a seven or an

eight right away. Because you are that. Like, if you add in that you could also support me, that's huge. It's not the intelligence. It's the financial. Well, I mean, all of it. The intelligence is a big part of that because then she could make decisions that I don't want to make decisions.

Right. Yeah, I just don't find her to be that dynamic of a personality. However, I am a huge fan of Kacey Musgraves, who was the musical guest. Every skit was about how she's an attractive girl. Do you remember when they had Katy Perry host? Oh, yeah.

The jump up and down scene. It just felt like everything they were doing was like... The Hooters sketch. Yeah. I was thinking after seeing all the jugs hanging out, memes and everything of her on the social, like Milana Vayntrip, when we talk about that, you're like, is she butting up too hard,

too high on the commercials? I feel like I'm still a bigger fan of Milana, and maybe part of it is that they're just not hanging out and hitting me in the face. Is that an old man thing? Because it's kind of cool. No, I don't think it's an old man thing. Just a little something to the...

The unknown. Yeah. And knowing that, well, if you are with her, like, man, they're for me. With her? No, if you're hooked up, if you're a boyfriend, you're whatever, I'm just saying. In a loving,

respectful relationship. Yeah, then those are for me. She's not firing them out for everybody. And that's why, you know, if you get a boyfriend looking at you sideways

because you glanced at some girl's jugs that are hanging out, you're like, wait, wait. Is she trying to show them off or not? Am I not allowed to look?

I mean, I think there's an element of showing them not just for somebody else to, like another male to get the gaze, but also just to, like, feel confident. A lot of it's for other women. Mm-hmm. Hmm. Sorry. I know that you were, like, on this.

It's so deep. No, no. I want to know what. This ownership angle that you were... Anyways. Let's zip through this, and then we'll get to Jerry Jones. I want to... Just because...

Hey, everybody. It's time to answer some of today's viewer mail. I do... Let's see. Now, I have a ton of mail that has been actually mailed here, like real mail, here to the den high atop my garage. But let's do that tomorrow because I think we'll put out a video tomorrow. Okay.

I'd like you to see some of it on the camera, on a video. But we recorded out of order last week and we actually gosh friday i forgot about what we did friday how could so we recorded just about six hours did did you get the final time on that uh no but i don't worry about it over Over five hours for sure. For sure. We were here a long time. With our lawyers. Were they here?

Yeah. They were here. You're sitting right there where Liz was. Were they wearing their lawyer suits? To the varying degrees in which they wear lawyer suits. Yeah. I think Phillip had his lawyer jeans on. Yeah.

And I probably wore my business jeans that day too I didn't want to Be dressed down like I am today Are you changing before the meeting today? Oh yeah Okay, just making sure I'm in my shorts right now But the business jeans are being pressed Okay, yeah

As we speak But so since we didn't do an actual show Business genes are being pressed as we speak. But so since we didn't do an actual show, I got a lot of birthdays and whatnot that have come in since Thursday, which was the last show that people think we did. Anyway, day four subby. March 1st is my 41st birthday. But whatever, everyone has one of those from Chris Ivanosky's. I have air hotmail.

I've been waiting for months to send my birthday on March 1st. Only discover you guys have already recorded tomorrow's episode yesterday. Maybe you'll read this next week. Yeah, now that's now. Making his dream come true. That's right. It's my Cobra Moose birthday. And yeah, now that's now. Making his dream come true. That's right. It's my Cobra Moose birthday.

Think sports nicknames if that's too vague. Who's Cobra? Colby Lewis? I barely missed it being my Captain America birthday by mere hours. Blake loves that bit. Yeah, 48. Okay. I think moose are much more identifiable local athletes than cobra.

All I want for my birthday is to convince my wife to let us have a remote at our bakery in Decatur, even though our demographic is more middle-aged white lady from Brandon. Well, we don't discriminate. Don't you think middle-aged white ladies like us? I mean, I know I like them. That's your demographic. I was going to say, yeah. That feels right up my alley. I'll come taste your pastry.

Dumbzoned. I'd like to wish my longtime friend and Day One DF, Matthew Makestad, a happy 30th. Leader is Uncle Gatmail and his fascination with home plate. More Blake dating app advice from day two, number 2124, Max B. All because of you, Ethan. He knows that he's number 2124. Uncle Hottie, day two, subscriber number 1602. Would have been day one, but I was too busy banging Blake's mom.

Okay. Today is my Andre Karolenko birthday. AK-47, baby. My heroes are November Ghosts and Blake's dating app, Tips. Okay, so he has a long extended... I'll read part of what he wrote next. This is a long email. He says, I don't really want to do Blake's job,

but here's a bit that I bet nobody else in the comedy podcast game does. Or maybe they all do. I don't know. I usually listen to recreation podcasts. He says, listeners can send in their stand-up bits for you guys to mock and ridicule or maybe give an acknowledgement

that when they're funny to justify their lifelong conviction that they are hilarious. And he sent a bunch of bits, but I'll just read the one. He says, my soulmate, the love of my life, died after a very short battle with SIDS, I'm assuming.

Oh. I mean, gotta laugh for me. He then says, less Blake from DF Mark. And that's the guy that had sex with Blake's mom? Or was that the guy before? No, that's the guy that's had nothing but terrible ideas email the show. Ooh. So why don't you just pocket that 690 and keep it and go spend it somewhere else?

Damn. This sounds like a guy who doesn't owe... That's a different guy. He's not the guy going to do the 690. Does Blake owe lawyers lots of money? It also sounds like a guy who doesn't owe... That's a different guy. He's not the guy going to do the 690. Does Blake owe lawyers lots of money? It also sounds like a guy who doesn't owe a lawyer any money. Yeah. Yeah, Blake, we don't want anyone to pocket their 690.

I always think of stand-up premises, but I can't think of the actual punchlines. It's probably a big part of the whole procedure. I was thinking about, did you guys ever, growing up, if you went to church, after church you'd go to a fast food restaurant and you're all dressed up still? Mm-hmm. And you're at Whataburger at 11, and there's just every kind of person in there

and you're all dressed up and you're like, this is really weird. That's the whole premise? That's the premise, but where's the joke? I don't know. There's not one. But it's relatable. I feel like it's a pretty good premise. I'm not changing careers. Just...

He stuck it out there. He did. Dan, day 2 DFF number 850. My birthday is also March 3rd. Maybe as a joint birthday present you could tell us about Anne Frank again. Heil Uncle Hotmail from Janae. Yes, my birthday was March 3rd. I remember when I used to have to care about that.

Well, I do want to... The only mention I want to give is to Adam Romo at Eatsies, who... Yeah. The weird thing is, my Clemson daughter texted me at midnight when it actually became my birthday. My France daughter texted me in the morning,

about 8 a.m., but it was pretty late in France, I guess. My mom texted me at 9 or so. Rose? Rose did not text me. A lot of friends texted me. Not you guys. I was very hurt by that.

Because I love getting a birthday text from a dude. Yeah, that was our gift, was leaving you alone. Yeah, that was our gift, was leaving you alone. Do you hate when somebody who... How do I describe this person? You know them and you're friends with them because you employ them. Like our... What do you call, like, financial guy?

The financial guy that every year for Christmas, they'll send, like, a gift basket or something, and you're like, okay, cheese. Or whatever. The only reason they're sending it is because you work with them and they work with your investments and all that.

It's not that dissimilar from getting a happy birthday email from Eddie Bauer. Right, so no, I got a ton of those. Because you got to put in your email. Your dentist. But when he gives a call and you know it's... It's only because...

I don't know. It just seems disingenuous. Well, I... For no other reason than I no longer work there, I deleted the bad radio calendar from my phone. Uh-huh. So I had no idea it was your birthday. See, I put in yours in my phone. I mean, I had all of them synced up, and there was a list of guests that I wanted to get. But, I mean, it pops up when it's your birthday.

I got a little birthday cake on my iPhone, and it says Jake's birthday. I used to have to track down Beverly D'Angelo. Good guest. She was a great guest. She was great. I think I still have her email. Anyway, so happy birthday, Janae, and thanks to Eatsy's Market and Bakery, because Adam Romo.

I was going to say, all these other people. Oh, did I even get to the part? My wife, at about 3 o'clock, comes up to me and goes, all these other people. Oh, did I even get to the part? My wife at about 3 o'clock comes up to me and goes, I'm so sorry. And I go, what? She goes, I didn't tell you happy birthday. Happy birthday. Like she forgot about it until that moment.

You're like, well. Yeah. There's one way to make it up. But you're not wearing your knee pads right now, so... Knee pads. But I'll tell you where they are. I pulled them right out of my pocket. Hey, I had them.

I happen to have these on. On me. And then I have a March 4th birthday. Says Guten Tag, day two, number 598. My brother Joel a pathetic four digit D-F-er happy 41st birthday

let him know he is the roach and he owes me $50 okay and that's from Todd in Wiley do you know him? I don't.

I wasn't talking to you. Yeah, I didn't think you knew him. You're not from Wiley. Where are you from, Ethan? Originally Plano, but I live in Bryan, College Station now. Home of the Aggies, Aggieland. Pretty familiar with where Bryan is. But how's that? I really like it. of the Aggies. Aggieland. Pretty familiar with where Brian is. But,

how's that? I really like it. Why is that? Well, Nice price per square foot? It has a nice price per square foot over College Station for sure

and definitely over DFW. It's pretty. We like it, yeah. We like Brian College Station. It's chill. It's only about an hour and a half from Houston and Austin

and, you know, Waco. and Austin and Waco. Got to be near Waco. Yeah. From the wonderful world of sports, Radio Sports Scoreboard. Anything you want to touch before, Jerry? Other than just my general Mavs despair. What's happening with the Mavs? Tell us What's happening with the Mavs?

Tell us what's happening with the Mavs. They have a terrible coach. Because I saw a lot of that yesterday. I didn't watch the game. Well, they were like nine-point favorites, and they lost. Because Embiid was out? I mean, he's been out, yeah. But I'm saying they were healthy.

Yeah. And they have a terrible coach. Was it here or there? It was here, yeah. Oh, okay. Didn't they start 11 up? Yeah. And they have a terrible coach. Was it here or there? It was here, yeah. Oh, okay. Didn't they start 11 up? They started out super positive, yeah.

And I was listening to it on the radio first. I went back and watched the game this morning, but it was like Coop and Brad Davis trying to do the first home game after a road trip. It's like how many excuses can we come up with for – It's tough to really get up to this. It's a road trip. It's like, how many excuses can we come up with for it's a day game. It's just, I don't know. A lot of turnovers, right? Tons of

turnovers and tons of points off turnovers. Why is everyone mad at Jason Kidd? The lineups are just a disaster. He doesn't know what he's doing. But I think we've kind of known that for a while now. So, I don't know. I mean, they got better at the deadline,

but there are just days like yesterday where you're like, they're always going to be held back by the fact that their coach. So, the days of him complaining about the roster in a post-game press conference. Well, they wouldn't fix that. I don't know about fixed it, but they definitely at least improved it whenever he was like, yeah, we need to call in the cavalry here at the deadline. And, yeah, it sucks. Tim Hardaway bad?

Tim Hardaway terrible. Tim Hardaway terrible for about the last month. That's kind of what you get with him, isn't it? Yeah. Like you never know. He's like the streakiest player ever. He can take over a game. Yeah.

For some reason, like Gafford barely plays. I don't know. Why is he not playing every minute that Lively doesn't? You would think. But I think they combined for like 29 minutes. So you would think that one of them would be on the floor for 45 minutes of the game. Yeah.

I don't know. I can't figure it out. Because Kidd loves Maxie? Kidd loves Maxie, that's for sure. But Maxie was out, wasn't he? I don't know. No, actually, yeah, Maxie played yesterday. He'd been out.

But their rotations are just really, really weird. Kyrie didn't give him, you know, I mean, he gave him, you know, it was like 25, 26, but it takes a ton of shots. Luka got another technical. Luka got another technical. Luca got another technical. Luca got another technical. Cuban was involved in a fight with a ref while he was wearing his customary Mark Cuban Dallas Mavericks football jersey.

I love it. It's so bad. We have a Mavericks football jersey now. Somebody gave us one, right? Or a jersey tee? I have a Romo jersey tee. Oh, is that what it is? Okay. us one, right? Or a Jersey Tee? I have a Romo Jersey Tee. Oh, is that what it is?

Okay. Yeah. All right. Yeah. They're not very good. They're fine. See, because right after the trade deadline, I thought it was thought of that,

oh, man, this is a top four seed. They won seven in a row. Yeah. And now we're back to they're a bubble team? They'll get hot again. I still think they're probably worthy of not being in the play-in. And they're always going to have a shot if Luka and Kyrie are healthy. But I also think they're always

going to have the second best head coach in any game that they play. How's my Luka MVP thing looking? I mean, he lit it up yesterday. There was a ton of talk about that on social. What?

The Luka MVP. It's starting to come around a little bit. It's bubbling. Okay, I told you guys. Yeah. I told you guys. Let's just root for me once. How about that?

I'm all for you. Okay, thanks. You hit on your Stefanski bet. And another one, didn't you? Purdy didn't hit. Purdy didn't hit. I had... Early in the season last year, I took Micah MVP.

Because that would have got me like $80,000. You know, you never know. Although maybe you do know. That's a good segue, right, into Jerry talk? Sure. Because what did you tell us last week very confidently? I thought that because of everything that had come out publicly non-football related

with the Alex Davis paternity test news, I thought that he would not speak at the Combine. Because there have been, there was at least one other time that he skipped either the Senior Bowl or the Combine because of something that was in the news. I don't recall what it was, but it was something,

it might have been something related to this. Vegas drunk? Remember that picture? That might have been it. Yeah. That's a great picture. So I know he skipped at least one of these before. Maybe that was just scheduling related and had nothing to do with off-the-field issues. But I did not think that with that news coming out on whatever it was, Wednesday or Thursday,

I did not think he was going to sit down and do the 40 to 60-minute bus thing. I figured he'd just let Steven do it. Maybe Will McClay steps in. But lo and behold, he did. Yeah. He sat there with a – And it's great. It's something I always wanted to actually be present for.

Like, the media party is awesome. Like, getting to see Jerry hold court five drinks in is awesome, but getting to see him on the bus would be so great. Because they all have like a beer. Oh, really? Oh, yeah. Okay, I just listened to audio.

I didn't see. Yeah, that's part of the deal. I mean, I've talked to people who have been on there. Like there's a big cooler in there? Oh, yeah. Hey, just grab a beer. Yeah. Because he did a couple times say, we're all friends here.

Oh, yeah. We're all like, that's the attitude Jerry gives. Well, since we're all friends, we started right off with what you thought they would not address. Yeah, the paternity test. Which is apparently achievable via a cotton swab on your cheek. Right. You do not have to rub one out. Not a deposit.

No. Got a little support on that, by the way. Not much, but a little. I love Blake's hypotheticals. How do they do a paternity test for a woman? It's like, yeah, how do they? I think I didn't want to say, do they have to make her squirt? Oh, my God.

God, dude. Come on. Of all the things, you know, that's like the one. There's like two words I can't stand. Moist is one, squirt is another. That is fucking disgusting. If you figure out how to do it, will you let me know? This idiot.

It's pee, right? Yeah, it is. I don't know. They proved it. It's urine. They? Okay. There was like a team of scientists.

The CSI? Yeah. The cancer scientists took a break. Yeah. And said, hey, let me go test squirt it. We'll do half days on Friday. I was going to say, though, I didn't want to say that when we were talking about it at the public place.

And that's probably my fault. That's my bad. I feel like that crowd would have loved that a lot more than I did. I'm upset that you reacted that way. Was it a bus spear? This is Jake. This is the badass Jake. No, I'm just telling you. This is the guy who's been called in to look at a girl doing that.

I mean, he invented the four-pointer. Didn't you have a friend once say, hey, I got this squirter. Come on in and look, and you did? Yeah. And it's the grossest thing I've ever seen. Like he watched a buddy have sex with someone. That's awesome. Well, that's why I reacted that way.

It's not awesome. It's horrible. Oh, man. Good for her. She kept it going even though you came in there? It was way more than just me. Like a gallery? Wow.

This guy with a guitar. Wow. That's so great. That's awesome. It's horrible is what it is. Trust me. Doesn't sound like anybody here has seen it. No.

It's horrible. I don't think I'd want to see it, but... Just trust me. Anyway... Back to Jerry Jones. Yeah, commenting on the fact that he's been ordered to give a paternity test uh i don't those uh are uh as it turns out those are legal matters and and uh i can't talk about them right now to some degree but uh that'll work through, and I expect much perceived better news in the future.

Okay. Perceived? That'll work through, and I expect much perceived better news in the future. That's actually what I wake up and say in the mirror every day. I expect much better perceived news in the future. I don't even understand. Alright, let's talk football now. Can I say this real quick?

Is he trying to bank on the idea that he's never actually going to have to take this test? Or is he trying to bank on the idea that if he takes it, he will be proven you are not the father. Number one. He's never going to take this test.

That's what we were saying last week, right? What are they going to do? They're going to come hold his face down? Yeah, the steps they would have to take are, okay, he keeps denying this court order. We're going to have to send cops to actually take him in and enforce this. Subpoena? Are you telling me that's going to happen?

No, I don't think so. but it's weird how he says it he he frames it in a way of like there's going to be good news in the future when if the thing that you're saying and i agree with is actually what he's meaning it's just i can't comment on if there's going to be good, he'd be like, okay, I'll take it. Exactly. I know it's not mine. Exactly. Or she. Probably not it. Anyway, so now we're going to start talking football. And the guys are pretty happy about that.

And they may have even framed this particular question as, you know, people are fans. Others are. That's become so much more popular in the last couple years. Not me because I got a beer. I'm on the bus. It's great. But some are saying...

What would you say about the perception of... It's very BBC. Right, but that... Here we go again. Like, we've seen... Yeah, what's different about this year? Well, I will assure you there'll be some things done differently because we're going to be working on different players

and drafting different people. And so just the very nature of it is different, different people. We've got different coaches. But I think the – So he's letting you know they're not going to draft Mozzie again. This year, they're going to draft different people. Different players. That you'll be working on.

Slash people or different people. Or that's different from players. Coaches. Some of them are different. Some of them are different. Some of them are different. What year was last year? What was the number of the year? 2023.

What's this year? 2024. Is that the same? That is different. You're right. It's one later. Opening day last year was September 10th. This year?

September 12th. That year, September 12th. That's different too. Yeah, things are just different. What would be different? Well, we're going to become the first team in NFL history not to bring back every single of the same players. Right. Most teams are doing that. And create a time machine

and play them the exact same schedule. I'm almost surprised he didn't say we're also going to play some different teams. That's right. Schedule way different. And when we face the Eagles, they're

going to have some different players on that. They will also have different players. For sure. They'll be older. So I think, yes, he focused on the word different, and we played semantics. So now he actually goes from that. You heard him like, he kind of transitioned without really even being asked about going all in because that's the big bit.

Yeah, I've heard quite a bit of that. Micah, I don't even know where that started. Did it start with Micah? I think it started with Jerry. Jerry, okay. Like that we're going all in this year. Yeah. I don't have much time.

We're going all in. So now we have to define that. And that's a fun part of this whole bus experience. But I think the attention that the nuances of where we are with the cap, the nuances of where we are with our position in the draft, the nuances of where we are with our free agents, that we get that involved in the definition of we're all in. As you would look at every one of those aspects, and I probably left off with that many again,

then we're going to be doing every solution or working toward the solution being to win this year. Every solution. Dude, that may be my favorite. It sounds, you know, we were joking around the other day about like doing some fun video stuff a la Prestige Worldwide. worldwide. The phrase, we're going to be doing solutions is like

the most prestige worldwide phrase. We're going to be doing solutions. The nuances of free agency and the draft need to be a part of the definition of all in. Jeez. And everyone just sits there and nods yeah

their banquet beer every phrase miller which is exactly what you'd be doing of course you're there no bring me more sushi all right maybe you guys don't quite understand what he means let's keep defining all in we won't put a lot of things and get value when we can get more value now or get more value in the future, it will be all in this year. And that could be in any area. It will be in any area, but it certainly doesn't have to just be in free agency or it doesn't have to just be in the draft an aggressive approach to the draft trading up with a lot of picks or trading down with a lot of picks we will just

have in mind the team that's going on the field this year that's important have in mind the team that's going on the field oh the field yeah this year oh this not last year right it's different that's amazing dude uh there's more on all in so you could have a free agent that and rather than have that free agent uh that free agent would cost you as much as three other players would cost you. Well, we're going to be all in with the three other players. But is that? That's all in.

No. That's my point. might be a trade like we didn't make or a signal we didn't sign a player last year or two years ago that we ended up with three players for that's all in what we're talking about now is what did I mean when we said all in okay your definition of what is all in and mine might not be the same thing yeah but i'm trying to win the games this year with my decision so i'm all into this year is he referring to randy gregory yes yeah because that's as if that was his decision to not sign him and rather than randy gregory's agent and we got three players instead of the one yeah they were able to to bring back dorrance

whoever else they signed. Dante Fowler. Dante Fowler, that's right. Is that just like when they traded Amari Cooper for nothing? That was all in. That was his definition of all in. Was it all in to not sign him? Yeah, because...

Or was it all in to sign three more players too? You can define all in how you want. Basically what he's saying is no matter what they do, it's all in. It's all in because if we decide the one free agent, like breaking the bank on this, although he did kind of make it sound like we're not going to be breaking the bank on some free agent.

Like don't get excited about so-and-so is a free agent and you think we're going to go after him or a trade. If you think we're going to trade for Diggs, Stefan Diggs or something like that, that's not going to happen. I think it's so weird too that obviously he's been extremely successful

in life but then all these other people who are there, very smart people, all these scribes have to say things like, right. Well, you want to keep them talking. I know, but when I can hear Todd Archer and David Moore and Clarence and Calvin in the background acting like anything that he's saying makes any goddamn sense at all. Yep, right.

Yep. But when the Rams – And then they get off the bus and they're just like, what did he just say? I have to write an article about this somehow. I have to figure out – When the Rams traded for Stafford and they got Jalen Ramsey and they traded for this top-end talent, that's all in.

When they had no picks for like four years. But when you let up. Or like when the Eagles went and got A.J. Brown and signed a couple of DBs and took advantage of their rookie contract. Yeah, but those things didn't work for those teams. No. Yeah. All those teams were in the Super Bowl.

Oh. Or I mean, any number of teams. Leading to the definition of all in. Right. Meaning you are mortgaging your future for this one year. That's what it means. But now he's saying, I'm going to do it my way, and I call my way all in,

even though I'm trying to be fiscally responsible and sign three other guys for less than this one guy. When it's the one guy that gets you to the effing Super Bowl. Probably one of those three guys that we sign won't even be active half the season. You know? Because they're a spare bit player. Okay, now they all didn't just sit and nod.

There was a very good question regarding all-in, and I don't know who asked this. You can give him credit afterwards, perhaps. But I thought this was a great question regarding when he's saying all-in. I guess the question, how is that different in past years? Because you've always been trying to win games this year, theoretically.

So, who is that? Clarence. Yeah, Clarence. Clarence will go at Jerry from time to time. Yeah, they all will, really, but how is that different? By the way, I wasn't disrespecting them by saying they have to just sit there and nod. No, no, no, I know.

I just mean they're smart people and they have to listen to him talk. But yeah, no, that's great. But I thought this is a great follow-up. I mean, every year you're trying to win. This year on the field. I've drafted quarterbacks for the future. Okay? Okay.

I would be reluctant to do that this year. That's an example. And use a top pick for, use our first pick for quarterback this year. For the future. If you had an opportunity, there you are at 24. And the greatest thing since ice cream is he's sitting there. I'd be reluctant to do that this year. Let's call all in to this year.

Okay, well, when is the last time they actually did draft a quarterback for the future? That's exactly what I wanted you to tell me. Because, I mean – I don't feel like – he's never since Troy Aikman. No, I mean, you've taken shots on drew henson and chuch and stephen mcgee was what the third round but that's when they had nothing they had nothing they were dying lamar was there quincy was like third round quincy might have been second but still was he i could be. I think we did this recently. Yeah, but still, I mean,

I don't feel like that's a departure strategy or approach at all. And also, does anybody ever say the greatest thing since ice cream? Ice cream does rock. Yeah, it does. Everyone likes it, but. All-in is not drafting a generational quarterback at 24. Yeah, especially when... Yeah, at 24 and when your quarterback is due for a massive...

Like, this would be the time to do that. Yeah. And you can tell that people have been approaching him about it. Yeah. And he said, no, not this year. We're all in. We're all in. All right. This is all good stuff.

Let me get to you. I'm just going chronologically. I'm sorry to jump, but is all in probably letting your Hall of Fame left tackle go and then replacing him with your first-round pick? Is that all in? Boy, we haven't even talked about that. You want to? Well, I can jump back because he did give his thoughts on Tyron Smith.

It's 10 seconds long. Jeez. We'll get in there in the right way and discuss his business and work out something that's good for both of us. Okay. So Jerry, always the optimist. So this weekend, yes, that did drop from who? Schefter, somebody, one of the breaking news guys said that,

boy, do you have the tweet? said that, boy, do you have the tweet? Just because the way it was worded to me was very much, this was given to me by Tyron Smith's agent. Yeah, I mean, at least I have the article pulled up, the Todd Archer ESPN article, Tyron Smith is unlikely to play a 14th season with the Dallas Cowboys after initial discussions left the sides at different ends of the salary spectrum, according to a source who confirmed multiple reports. And that came down Saturday.

Jerry, with the optimism, was Friday, right? Wasn't this bus thing Friday when we were lawyers? Yes. That's right. Yeah. Blake was upset that Jerry took this out of the trash. Knew what he was doing. Yeah.

But I don't, it doesn't sound to me like there's a whole lot of hope. Which, look, I mean. But they're negotiating in the press. He is here. We're going to get together and make some, we have to come up with something that makes sense for both sides. And then Tyron's people. Have you ever heard something like that before?

Tyron's people go to Todd Archer or Schefter and say, we're not even close. Yeah, what makes sense to Tyron is I took a team-friendly deal. My first deal, I took a team-friendly cut last year. I've done everything for this team. Also, it should be said, because I was extremely pessimistic about this, he was awesome last year. Like, he played most of the season and was as good as he's been in four or five years.

So, that could go at a moment's notice. He could immediately go back to playing six games a year. But he was awesome. So, they're in a really tough spot of having to try to – I mean, obviously they'll just kick Tyler Smith out, but now you need another guard. Now you're not really sure what you want to do with Terrence Steele. So you think they just move Tyler Smith over to tackle?

Yeah. Okay. I mean, it's what he is. Okay, but he's played so well at guard. He's played very well at guard, too. Yeah, but either way, you have some real problems and not a lot of picks to do it and not a lot of money to do it. Well, and Biotis is a free agent, too.

What did Jerry call him? No, Steven called him Baidez. Baidez, that's right. Baidez. Look at the, phonetically, if you've never heard anyone say his name, you might say that. So Stephen's never heard his name before. You are correct.

There's a very good chance that he hasn't. All right. Actually, I have his thoughts on different players, but let me just keep going back to – let's back up a little bit. So he's all in. This year is different. uh he's energized he feels good but he's also upset because of you know losing to green bay and losing in the first round every year uh i'm both i'm both i'm uh uh but But that's no problem. I've got, I've had a life of having some stuff that was so bad that I just stuck my head in the hole in the sand and like an

ostrich and went over to something that was going better. It's a good thing about having several things going. But then I'll get back around to it. I don't leave anything just enough to create a gap. So I've frankly lived a life where I had some bad things going a lot and had some good things going at the same time. I don't want to get philosophical here. But that's what we've got here with this team and with the way I look at this team.

That's amazing. So that's a positive, actually. When you say, well, I'd like my general manager just focusing on the team. Yeah, not Manny Pacquiao or Pepsi or Blockchain.com. But he's saying it's better because when things are going bad with negotiations with DAC or whatever. I'll just go book a fight.

Yeah, and then I'll feel better. I'll go to the X Games. Yeah. I'll go do a crypto deal. That, you know, there is some life like he said, he's getting philosophical there where he's just like, yeah, I just

ignore whenever people are like serving me paternity suits. I'm just like, I'm going to go look at the draft. Yeah. And then, you know, I'll get back to it. Yeah, eventually. Eventually, maybe. He doesn't leave a gap. No, no gap. He's an ostrich.

I mean, that's always been my thought on why, you know, doing sports talk in Dallas is so fun. Because if one team sucks or is out of the new, you know, we could just go over to this other one. We'll ignore the Mavs now and we'll just go jump on the Stars bandwagon and talk about that all the time or whatever. Yeah. But that's, you know, that's what we do.

I feel like that's way different than what he does. Okay. Football problem. So he was asked point blank, like, okay, this team has problems that need to be fixed. That's what he's going to address here. Problems, football problems, not subjective. Well, of the kinds of things you'd look at, we need some better help in a run game, period.

Both sides. The things you guys have been pointing to, need some help in that run game. Need some help in that run game. We certainly need to really be more disciplined relative to penalties. At critical times, untimely penalties. So basically that's it. The run game penalties. Don't do so many penalties. So basically that's it. The run game penalties.

Don't do so many penalties. Right. And then, okay. It is really weird, right? I feel like at one point I went through and did like a 20-year look at all the teams that McCarthy had been the head coach of. Maybe it was 15 years. His Green Bay teams, you know, there would be up years, there would be down years penalty-wise, but the McCarthy Cowboys are just wildly highly penalized.

Oh, really? Oh, yeah. Are they among the league leaders? Yeah, I just looked this one up. Third last year. And it's been something like top five every year he's been here. And, you know, it's the old adage of coaches saying we don't coach penalties. So is it a style of play thing?

Is it just like the type of guys you have? Some of them are penalized more than others because they don't have, you know, the mental focus or something. But it is really weird. The league has it out for us. That's right, computer. That's what they always say in postgame. I mean, that doesn't help the argument.

You've got to play the other team and the refs. It's the cowboy way. We've heard that half a dozen times in the last three years. It's almost like it has more to do with culture. Yeah, well, we'll get to culture in a second, but that's – yeah, part of that, I think, is always blaming the refs and all that. That just feeds it, you know? But I should also say –

Instead of kind of blame yourself a little bit. There have been really good teams who were penalized a lot. Like, let's see, San Francisco was fifth last year. It does happen. It's just that for whatever reason under McCarthy with Dallas, it's happened every year. Well, and Jerry even pointed out at crucial times. Yeah, which that's a very small sample size.

It's hard to say that. I also do, real quick, because I can't get enough of this. I love how he acknowledges, yeah, we need to get better at the stuff you guys have pointed out. Right. I mean, you guys. You guys know. I read what you write.

I know exactly. You guys are just right. You guys could run this team. Yeah, basically. It's implicit in what he's saying. So he's still talking about trying to get better, and then I think he's going to mess up another cliche. I think he's going to mess up another cliche.

So it's not an unattainable situation to have the deep disappointment and frustration that our fans and I have, and we all have, about how we ended. But to also be not foolish about what we've got as a team and not throw that out with the bathwater and build off of that. And that's what we're doing. Yeah. So don't tear it down. That's if I'm translating, right?

Don't throw the baby out with the bathwater. Don't trade everything just because you're kind of bitter here. Yeah. And far be it for me to criticize somebody for the way that they're speaking. After last week, again, I completely botched how a paternity test works. But I thought when I first heard that audio this morning that the headline was going to be that he confused unattainable and untenable. Yeah, he said unattainable. That's a weird one.

At the very beginning, if you want to hear it again. He meant to say untenable. He meant to say untenable. He might have meant to say unattainable. That's a weird one. At the very beginning, if you want to hear it again. He meant to say untenable. He meant to say untenable. He might have meant to say unattainable. That's true. So it's not an unattainable situation. That is not a word. Unattainable.

That is not a word. He combined two words. Yeah, and then he kept going, and he's like, don't throw it out with the dishwater. It's beautiful. So you mentioned culture. that's another thing that's been in the news headlines uh so we've heard all in we've heard uh well maybe there's a culture problem weren't we talking about this maybe even with demarcus lawrence saying they're tired then

micah parsons is on there saying, I would never say that. Everybody seems to have stuff going on. I don't know. Culture, to me, is somewhat like goodwill. Right? And it is to Jerry as well. What is culture? I'm asking. I really won't hear your definition of what culture is.

I really can't say. When I look at our team, we need to be able to stop the run better and we need to be able to run the ball better. If that's culture, then we've got a problem. But I'm not. Do you want to see a sense of entitlement or anything like that? No. No.

With players. Yes, with players. No, no, not at all. Our players that many deserve to feel good about themselves and feel good about the plays what they have contributed to the team, but those happen to be the very same players that get down on themselves more than anybody when they don't play well. That is not a problem on this team. At all. We don't have anybody pointing it over there at somebody else.

They're pointing it at their own mirror. Pointing at their own mirror. Yeah. No one's blaming. No one's pointing fingers. Alright. You know what I want to do? Take a break, but then I want to get to not like you have to tease. You can fast forward two minutes here, but it's, you know... Just because he does talk individual players.

He did mention Tyron, but, you know... Little Dak. The Dak extension, that's a big deal. Well, you know, Dan, I hate any time anybody is killed or anybody dies. But he was a guy that was living to be dead, so to speak. You know, they told him, don't under any circumstances leave school early. You just don't have the work habits. You don't have this.

You don't have that. What do you do? Left school early. I always can remember this. We invited players to the draft, and he was one of the players we invited to the draft, and we were told, no, we're going to have our own party. His own party was a party at the bowling alley, charged him 50 bucks to get into the bowling alley for his party. His own party was a party at the bowling alley, charged him 50 bucks to get

into the bowling alley for his party. It was always something, you know, it's one of those things. I'm never offside, but they keep calling me for offside, is what it is. So, you know, it's a tragic thing. Anytime anybody dies, tragic, and especially when you're 24 years old and you've got your whole life ahead of you. But, you know, maybe if he'd have stayed in school a year, he wouldn't do silly things. I mean, when you're jogging on a highway, you know, on a road like that,

that leaves it open because I'll tell you, it's so... A guy has two drinks and he's just a little bit to the right side of the road and gets hit and killed, it's easy to happen. Yeah. No pumping, no pumping, no pumping, no pumping, no pumping, no pumping, no pumping, no pumping. You're listening to The Dumb Zone. I like this new bit of making us songs. He's a eater. The Great Jameson? The Great Jameson?

The Great Jameson. You still have to play the drop, or is it sort of implied because it was the central... Well, at the end of... Were you there? Still? Yeah. When you let the crowd down? We were at the show, the road show we did on Thursday in Athens.

At the end of it, somebody said, I never got to hear the no puppet drop. Like, they were... They said, that's why I came out here. That's kind of the only reason I came out here. Exactly. So... So... No puppet!

Alright, back to Jerry. So, Jerry Jones... Can't believe you said squirt earlier. What's your deal with moist? Come on, nobody likes moist, right? Isn't that like a common... Yeah, but nobody had the reaction that you did for squirt.

Like start yelling and crying. Again. Like a little. It's like for me, hearing that word is like a veteran going in and seeing the opening scene from Saving Private Ryan.

So it's because you've seen it? Yeah. Live? Yeah. Yeah, because I mean little squirt guns are fine. People just leave the theater crying. There's a nice soda called squirt. Oh? Yeah. Yeah, because, I mean, little squirt guns are fine. People just leave the theater crying. There's a nice soda called squirt.

Oh, yeah. Who doesn't enjoy a nice lemon lime? World War II rope hat on. You're just like a soldier, you know? Exactly. Is this girl hot? It doesn't matter. You're a spexer.

That's right. Enough to listen to somebody play guitar. All right. You want to know if Jerry's going to extend DAC? Do tell. I can't wait. We don't need to, but we can if everybody... So what we're doing here, just to let you in ahead,

we are now negotiating the contract using the media. Sure. Just kind of the same way that Tyron's people did that as well. It's not out of the question that Tyron is a cowboy this year. Yeah, you're more confident about that than I am,

but you've also been right a lot. So the fact that they planted that was a negotiating ploy. Like, hey, we're very far away. We told you that behind closed doors. Now we've made an announcement publicly. So the point is you better move on that number or – in fact, if you read the tweet – I don't even know if you have – the Tyron Smith tweet was, gosh, it was just the way it was worded.

Did you ever find that, Blake? No. It wasn't Schefter. Oh. Gosh darn it, I'll find it. Was it Gelkin? No. It was one of the guys, the big guys.

I don't consider Gelkin the big guy. One of the guys, the big guys. I don't consider Galkin the big guy. One of the big guys passed this weekend. Dude, that hurt. Who? Yeah, the Mort report. Mort report. That's tough. Are you a big Mort guy?

Here, talk about Mort while I look for this tweet. Is it the Todd Archer one? Tyron Smith unlikely to play 14th season for Cowboys. Door might not be entirely slammed on a return pending how the free agent market shakes out. I don't know. I'm looking at Jenna Ryan's tweet. Her and her boyfriend got a matching tattoo.

I saw that. It was a tough day for me. That's not the one I was looking for. That one hurt. More than Lorde. Just all this bad news this weekend. I know. But you won that game. Both of them. Isn't that what's really important?

I'll find it. Let me just play you. We're going to negotiate Dak's contract right now by telling you guys. We don't need to, but we can if everybody wants to solve it. You can. And so how is you get in and get on the same page and see if you can come to an agreement. If you can't, what we have in place works. And so, obviously, if you do it one way, then that gives you, you'll be working through some of the other areas on the team in a different way.

some of the other areas on the team in a different way. But you can't really plan on that until you see where you are there. That's what we're doing. Okay, so this is the key part. And so obviously, if you do it one way, then that gives you, you'll be working through some of the other areas on the team in a different way. All right. You know how we did lose that Hall of Fame left tackle? I mean, if you won all the money. That's fine.

Then it's probably a late-round pick or just, like, you know, minimum guy protecting your blind side. We could do that. I'm not making that choice, really. Right now, the choice is yours. If you want the best team around you, we're going to do it a different way. But the pie is only so big.

Now, he didn't say that, but that is exactly what we've heard every year, and that's what he means here. Sure. You are now making the choice. Because you can get all the money. I mean, come on. But you want lesser talent around you?

That's not my call. It's now in your court. Because the other thing he's also doing is there have been some, you know, quote, reports that Dak might not even want to restructure right now. Why is that? Because if he plays for another year at the level that he did last year, his number is only going to go up.

So, you know, if he restructures right now, obviously there's part of it, which is what you're saying, which is that, you know, he's going to get a huge number, but they can lower the cap hit on the front end of it, which I think the Cowboys probably actually want him to do. Whereas, like, Dax people might say, no, the price of the brick only goes up every day. And if we come out here and play at an MVP level again next year and I'm completely free, like he doesn't have to do it.

The difference would, the only difference would be how much money are you getting guaranteed to you right now. But if he's fairly confident in himself, he's like, no. I'll carry a $60 million cap hit next year. I'll go out and be a top five to seven quarterback next year. What are you going to pay me after that? Is this the last year of his deal? Yes.

Well, yes and no. I think yes, but also he has these voidable dummy years that are kind of confusing. Like there would still be dead money if he left after this year? I believe so, yeah. Okay. Yeah. It feels like it's all a game and that they will extend him. Sure.

Probably at camp. But I don't know. It's certainly Jerry likes being in the news every day. But can you wait till camp if you have to sign free agents and draft picks? Like Jerry kind of intimated that there. Like we can't decide all that other stuff till we get this decided. Free agents and draft picks? Like, Jerry kind of intimated that there. Like, we can't decide all that other stuff until we get this decided. Whereas, remember last time he was up,

it was, well, they ended up getting Zeke done. They ended up getting... Who's our sunglasses? Jayla Smith. Yeah, like, they did a lot of things ahead of Dak, and then it ended up costing them even more on Dak. I don't know. Well, I guess at that time,

they still had the franchise tag they could do. Of course, Dak's people are very smart and did not allow that for this. If we move to Tyron Smith, I did find the Ian Rappaport tweet that I thought was really... Okay, tell me how you know this was written by an agent.

Tell me this was written by an agent without telling me this was written by an agent. Okay, there you go. End of an era. Cowboys all pro and pro bowl left tackle Tyron Smith

will be a free agent and is unlikely to return to Dallas, sources say. The blind side protector since 2011. Smith will be highly coveted. I feel like the last sentence was entirely written by CAA or whoever.

You remember the Cowboys didn't write that? Like, oh my gosh. What if the Cowboys did? He will be highly coveted. The awfully injured left tackle. Right. Who wants too much money. Appeared in less than 50% of the games in the Mike McCarthy era.

Which is all true, right? Those things. So, yeah, now we're playing games. Also, let's send this message to Michael Gallup's people. If Michael Gallup's people. If Michael Gallup was concerned, are we going to be cut here? Shut up, Blake. Don't have a decision that we would like to talk about right now.

It's one that we'll be going over with him. But nothing that we would say independent of without him being involved. We to sit down and go over his stuff with him before we talk about what we're going to do or not do i mean we're not going to necessarily release you but at this number we're not paying so we're going to talk about this and again you can make the decision here you can take the pay cut and here's what the pay cut is or you know you can go ahead and test that market man because i've seen other stuff about michael gallup's market going to be good it's going to be strong why well that's put out by michael gallup's people and you get these idiots like rapaport this is This is a really...

This will be fun to... We have a guest on Friday. I think it'll be fun to talk about this stuff with him. Can we promote? We have Ethan Strauss as a guest lined up. Like he'll... Just this whole new... This world of media that these guys have become huge, big money superstars

just to be mouthpieces for both sides. Yeah. It's pretty incredible. They're not really breaking any news. Yeah, I would just say this real quick, though. I don't know that they can just move on from Gallup. They just signed him. A couple years ago. I mean, do you want to carry a... Would you rather just have Michael Gallup. They just signed him. A couple years ago.

I mean, do you want to carry a... Would you rather just have Michael Gallup out there as your third or fourth wide receiver at that number, or would you rather have to pay $5 million for nothing? What's his number? I don't know. 13 or 14, but

did you see the... Do you see what receivers are getting now? Well, like Justin Jefferson's going to get $30 14, but did you see what receivers are getting now? Well, like Justin Jefferson is going to get $30 million. Okay, well, a third wide receiver making $14 million a year is not like the craziest thing in the world. No, but if they like Jalen Tolbert or whoever. His production, though, was not that of a third wide receiver, was it? No, but maybe he was, I don't know.

Maybe he was still hurt. Who knows? I think I would take the dead money. I mean, yeah, that's really the question is, would you rather just carry $5 million to $6 million of dead money to just have him gone? And maybe you would. But you're also about to have to pay your wide receiver one $30 million a year

because he's not going to take less than Aquaminious St. Brown just got. Aquaminious, you mean? Did I say that wrong? No, you're talking. Amon Ross. Amon Ross. Amon Ross. Yeah, not his brother.

I would love CD to take Aquaminious's number. He's a Bears wide receiver, right? Isn't it like $27 million? Did he? I'm pretty sure. Well, I know the report came out today that, yeah, CD wants, what, four for $120? Yeah. And?

The report from CD, probably. Yeah, but after the year he had, it's probably worth it. Yeah, see, the rumor is $28 million for Amon Ross St. Brown. I got like three minutes more of audio. Do we want it? Yeah, I guess so. Let's do it. Because he did talk in circles about Trey Lance a little bit. Arrow is really up.

He's every bit... He's exceeded expectations as a person, as a worker, as a character. He's got unique skills. All right, you know what? Let me just fast forward 40 seconds. We didn't get to see that. What we do know, though, is what he's done at practice and what he's been. Say he didn't get to see him in games.

I want to be real clear. We don't know about his game experience, his competitive experience, but we do know about his practicing and things he's done there. All plus. Okay, blah, blah, blah. He did say something in there that the one thing I didn't end up playing but I thought was kind of interesting. He said that's why we picked up his contract this year.

Did they do the fifth-year option? No, they have another year for that. Yeah, it's just keeping him for next. They rostered Bonestin. So they could have just cut him. Correct. And not owed him anything. Yeah, they did not pick up his $22.5 or whatever it is for next.

So they picked up $4 million or whatever? Something like that, $4 or $5. Which is not nothing. Yeah, exactly. Especially if you already have Cooper Rush and you feel like he's a fine... Cooper Rush may be in trouble. I would hope he is.

Yeah, I know. If you've invested this into Trey Lance. Guaranteeing... Now, the problem is... You don't know? Then what are you going to do? The 22 million thing? You're never going to do that with Trey Lance.

No. If Dak walks. But don't you have to declare that $22 million this year? Can you do it at the beginning of next year? Yeah, but then Dak will be free. I think you can do it at the beginning of next year. Okay. I think.

Could be wrong about that, but. How crazy would that be? If Dak walks and then you throw Trey Lance out there. Finally get your first-round quarterback, Blake. Not in the way that I wanted it. Third overall pick. Sure. But just not paying your somewhat above-average quarterback

$65 or $70 million seems pretty sweet. But if he actually turned out to be good, it would be a brilliant move. Yeah, except for the problem that he would immediately need a new contract. Oh, okay. Well, it wouldn't be $60 million. It wouldn't be $60, but... Probably be $30, right?

Yeah. All right, and then I'll end with this. It's a two-minute clip. But they're asking him about Mike Zimmer. Okay. And what Mike Zimmer brings to the team and all that. Accountability, he's Mike Zimmer, he's all Mike Zimmer-y. Hot girlfriend, ex-girlfriend.

Where's an eye patch? And I'll never forget, I may have told you guys, but I had a coach, and he was beloved. Certainly, I thought a lot of him. And we stunk it up, and I did, against Mississippi and Ole Miss and Little Rock. We came home, and we were at Fayetteville in a team meeting. And Stephen was about a year old.

And so this coach rakes me over the coals in the meeting in front of the whole team, a bunch. The meeting's over. I go out in the hall and he comes out and says, Jerry, how's Stephen? I said, What, coach? He said, How's Stephen? I said, Stephen, how could you even ask me about Steven?

You've made me crawl under the desk in there. I've never felt anything like that. Don't you ask me. Don't give a shit about Steven. Give a shit about me. Well, boy, he goes, oh, Jerry, Jerry, Jerry, you're missing it. You're missing it, son. He said, I know more important to you than anything in the world is to be a football player. I know that. And I'm trying to help you be that. And that's my way of trying to make you better. I love you, and I do love Steve.

And, of course, the guy later on, when I got in business, I went in business with him. Same guy. What kind of business? It was insurance. Insurance. So he was a beloved coach, and he actually had a little something touched steven when steven went back to school up there at the time but bottom line is zimmer that's the way zimmer might do it adam jones talking to zimmer or dion talking to them oh that kind of stuff man did you forget

he was asked about Mike Zimmer? I kind of did, yeah. I got lost for a second. This guy touched Steven. Steven's, I don't know, touched by. Does touched mean you're mentally disabled? Does it? Yeah, right?

Like he's touched? Yeah. Like an old 40s term? You know, a pederast. Okay, then he later touched Steven. I mean, it's part of the game. His name was Jerry Sandusky. I think it's a really funny follow-up from,

I couldn't tell if it was Todd or Machoda, the what kind of business. I thought it was like a call your bluff. Yeah, like yeah. Like you did not. Insurance is the most generic answer. Yeah. Insurance. That's great. And yeah, that's what I love

about Coach Zimmer. What is this question again? By the way, I guess I didn't realize that Jerry had Steven whenever he was still on the team. Yeah, through me. College parent? I thought about well, I guess I didn't realize that Jerry had Steven whenever he was still on the team. That threw me. Yeah. College parent? I thought about, well, I thought during the thing is we should research that. Is that?

That's probably true. I mean, he was definitely married. Married in college? Yeah. I remember hearing that. I've been thinking so much about Steven and Alex Davis being brother and sister. After we talked about it last week, all weekend, I was just like,

how do they shake hands? Someone said they could get us her number. Do you want to play? Brothers got a hug. Yeah, why not? Well, you just don't like booking guests. Yeah, we can have her on the show. Oh, thank you.

Have her in the den? Even better. Now we're talking. Okay, we ready to move on? Sure. That in the den? Even better. Now we're talking. Okay, we ready to move on? Sure. That's a lot of cowboys. I hope we're moving on to this. So, I don't know if you guys kept up with this over the weekend, Dan,

but the situation in the Texas panhandle, which you're very familiar with, because, oh, it's like the handle of a pan. Upper left. It's on fire. Oh. Very much on fire. Like it's doing great? No, not like from an economic development standpoint.

Firefighters working to stop the largest wildfire in state history. This is a big one. They've had to evacuate several towns, a few more over the weekend. I always find this to be a bit interesting, just kind of from the makers of here's the economic impact of the Olympics

or the Super Bowl. When they quote you, the percentage that the fire is contained. It feels like a very rough guess to me. What are they saying? Well, that's the other thing that's weird about it, is that they differentiate, even in one area, like that there are three different fires.

So they say as of Sunday afternoon, the Smokehouse Creek fire was 15% contained, but the other two fires were 60% contained. And it just feels like you're kind of like... 60%, not 50, not 65. Right. Just a really, really rough guess. And it just means how much of it is not moving, right?

I think so. They're not spreading, I guess would be the better verb. So yeah, they're just looking at the fire. Ah, this half, a little more than half is still moving. Yeah. 1,900 square miles. But then didn't they get snow? Oh, I didn't know about that.

During the fire? Yeah, they had fires in the panhandle, and then the rain that we got last week was snow in the panhandle, and I think that actually helped contain the fires a little. Hmm. You would think? Yeah. A little climate change coming through for us.

Is the panhandle that shape because of slavery? Do we need our historian? I think that's the Oklahoma panhandle. No, you're pretty much right. Like that, the, well, yes, it is the Oklahoma panhandle, but like the way that that thing juts over like that, the Oklahoma panhandle

part at the top of Texas, that is 100% a parallel related to slavery. Because we needed slavery. So you're both right, sort of. Hey, look at us. Yeah. Educational. Thanks, Jake.

Thanks for making us feel better. It's funny, too. The conversation that we just had about would snow help put out a fire preceded that. It seems like it would. These are like the exact – It's like water, right? Do you remember when your kids were young? That's the exact sort of conversations you would have.

She'll ask me, how come rain doesn't put out the sun? I'm like, fuck, I don't know. Yeah, that's a great one. She's like, well, because if you put water on fire or something hot, doesn't it go away? And I'm like, yeah. And she's like, well, how come whenever it rains, the sun doesn't go out? Because I think a couple weeks ago it was like raining

when it was somewhat sunny outside. Well, the sun is out there. Yeah, I know, but I can't explain that to her. Well, it's not raining on the sun is out there yeah i know but i can't explain that to her well it's not raining on the sun but she looks up and sees rain coming from sky and sun up there and she's just like this makes no sense it's like i wouldn't rain put the fire out i feel like your daughter is very logical she asked a lot of questions like that where I'm just like, oh, man. I really don't know. She would logically understand that the sun is above the clouds. Yeah, I mean, I worked through it.

Especially if you just kind of give her a wrap on the back of her head. Yeah. That's how you get them to pay attention. Speaking of the sun, some Texas schools are canceling classes for the solar eclipse. Yeah. Okay. Okay. I'm fired for the solar eclipse. Yeah. Okay. I'm fired up about this eclipse, guys. I know.

I can tell. You got your specs? I was going to reveal on the video show tomorrow. Oh, no. But somebody... So I had something in my Amazon cart, but I had not hit go yet. And then I got an Amazon package this weekend. And in it was this.

It is a four-pack of glasses that you can view the eclipse. And then I went to my phone. I'm like, did I hit go on that? And I have not. So some nice patron, some listener, this is AAS approved. And it says in parentheses,

AAS is a NASA partner. So this is like space approved. And look, there's like a picture of Saturn on the front. You're not going to wear it? There's an astronaut. No. You can do the Trump. I'll be inside.

I'll be preparing the news. You're going to be outside. We're going to be live streaming outside somewhere. Yeah. And for four, three minutes or whatever, you're going to be live streaming outside somewhere. Yeah. And for four, three minutes or whatever, you're going to be like, oh my god. I can't wait because I'm really enjoying that you are

poo-pooing this because I think you're going to be like, wow, dude. You're right. That was awesome. It gets very dark. It's going to be wild. I'm pro solar eclipse. Would you rather watch the eclipse or watch a girl squirt again? Dude.

Probably the eclipse, to be honest with you. I wish I would have had the glasses for that. That'd be a great thing to invent. Squirt glasses. So you don't really see the whole thing. And it's kind of like you could also use this for a... Here's Dan for squirt glasses. What was I watching? A movie.

Maybe it was Leave the World Behind. A movie? I don't call those movies, bud. No, but... I like them. No, you ever watch a movie and there's like somebody putting a needle in? Yeah.

For me, I got to kind of put my hand up a little bit. The pimple popper videos. Yeah. I'll see some of it through my fingers, but I don't want to see it all. Or somebody cutting into flesh and you're like, well, no, that's clearly it's fake. Nah, I don't care though. I can't watch it. Like same bit.

So these glasses, you would be able to wear them for gory scenes or for squirting scenes. This is a good idea that Jake just came up with. And as expected. And now, look at how he doesn't... He's so distanced. But he doesn't back off when we say the word squirt anymore. I know. Yeah.

Like, I think you've come a long way. Thank you. I appreciate you recognizing that. You're desensitizing him. The reports are coming out from Airbnb, and they're exactly what you would expect. What? Where the pattern in Texas is up about 1,000%. Are we surge pricing?

100%. Gouging. I really want to rent out my house. I know. It's probably too late. It's probably not too late, actually. If there's heavy demand, somebody will probably try to scoop in last minute. Boy, can you get your addition built real quick?

No. I don't think so. I could just leave. One month. Is your vacation, your lake home, already sold? I forgot to look that up over the weekend. My guess is yes. Somebody got a deal.

Probably so. They'll be right out there at that table. No one can see. Then your hypothetical could come true, both at the same time. That's right. Boy, that is what you do at that table. your hypothetical could come true. Both at the same time. That's right. Boy. That is what you do at that table. Yeah, a 1,000% increase in searches for properties

in the path of totality. Dun, dun, dun. So ominous. We're in that, right? Yes. I think Ohio is, too. I was talking about... You have to go to Ohio, though.

I was talking to my buddy Sven over the weekend. You know Sven. Have you met Sven? Only through hearing about him. Unless he was there the night that I said Joe Thomas wasn't a Hall of Famer, and I don't believe he was. No, he's like 6'6", 6'8". I would have remembered that.

Let's go 6'6". The eclipse has also spurred an increase in nightly hotel rates in Texas as they're cleaning up as well. It's not just Airbnb. I hope there's some sort of little cottage industry a la like Roswell, New Mexico. With the aliens? Yeah, where people are able to, for four or five days,

just sell whatever dumb stuff they can fleece to tourists. Like, Bucky's is going to clean up. Dude, this is a good idea for our live stream. We could sell t-shirts. I promise you that there will be people selling t-shirts on the street. Like in Victory Plaza

and stuff like that. It'll be like the Dumb Zone logo, but it'll be like the dumb zone logo but it'll be like mostly covered that's good i survived the 2024 eclipse so where are we going to do this from i know we talked about like hey we're definitely going to be live streaming during this but is it going to be here we could just do it here outside because that you know would mean we're not fighting crowds because you got to think if there's any real good places to do it or would some building let us do it atop their building that'd be pretty sweet that'd be pretty sweet i bet you i bet you there's gonna be like some downsides to this

like crime seems like a good time to do some looting to me in the cloak of the the night yeah and everybody's like out looking at it and not paying attention

it's only gonna be like two three minutes yeah but everybody's gonna be like building up to it beforehand. So while everybody's standing there staring in the sky? I'll rob a liquor store. Isn't that what the prestige told us? What's that?

A magician movie? Yeah. Get everyone's eyes looking one way, and that's when you can pull off a magic trick. Yeah. It's a good movie. I'm predicting crime. There's your news.

The Dumb Zone News. Like and subscribe. I'm predicting the opposite. You're predicting giving. Harmony and unity. Yes, giving. Peace and harmony. In fact, this will bring us

all together. Hence homelessness. The left, right. Peace and harmony. In fact, this will bring us all together. Ends homelessness. The left, right, you know, Trump, Biden, whatever you believe in, you will be united. But although, do you think the border will just like,

people will be pouring through for that three minutes? I would be. Yeah. The last thing I'll say is I just cannot wait to see how SportsMayer makes this about him. Somehow, someway.

Just trust me. Somehow, someway. The Dumb Zone presents Today in History. I think we have plenty of time for this. And then we've got business meeting.

I mean, just, you know what I mean. By the way, SportsMaker was on Ted Cruz's podcast, which exists, apparently. Did you listen? Not yet. Are you going to? I might. I feel like, yeah, cut some of that up. He's not just like, hey, I think I'm more for lesser government.

He's leaning into it hard. He's hanging out with Dan Patrick. He's going full repub. Pauly and McLovin. I think it's a different Dan Patrick, but maybe it's not. I don't know. It would be kind of cool if the Texas Dan Patrick had his assistant, and he called him McLovin.

Yeah. Thank you. I like that. I've never watched the Dan Patrick show. Well, I used to board op it. Oh, you did? Well, I mean, we ran it at night, you know. We did.

It's not bad for generic. I didn't know that. Yeah, so when I did, I guess it was the top 10, and I would work until either 10 or 11. We would run two hours of that every night. I didn't hate it, honestly. It was a very collaborative vibe to it. McLovin has his own show now.

He does. I think several of them have moved on. CBS or something. Yeah. Did Dan Patrick ever have Keith Olbermann on? I'm sure he did. Okay. You know, a reminisce.

But not to your, when you were on the board? I was just a big fan of those guys. I know you hate Olbermann now. I do hate Olbermann now, but back then, I at least loved Dan Patrick. But I also love Stuart Scott, which I think you've always been pretty anti-Stupot. Yeah. Is it that you don't like him or that you don't like what he created? Yeah, you don't like the spinoffs.

Because all that audio that I've brought to you from ESPN Saturday morning is all Stuart Scott, where they're like, all right, let's head over to the cell, see what the pens did against the... Yeah, and I guess it's all just evolution, right? We started with Chris Berman, and I can't just do Chris Berman. I have to bring it up a notch, and then we end up with Joey Zanaboni. You know who I really loved was, what's his name, Charlie Steiner. Yeah.

I loved that guy. Yeah, I love him. He ended up being the Dodgers voice on radio. Did you know that? I did not, but that's a great note. Hey, I love him. He ended up being the Dodgers voice on radio. Did you know that? I did not, but that's a great note. Hey, thanks, man. Today is Monday, March 4th. On this day in

1998, the U.S. Supreme Court ruled that sexual harassment at work Cut it out. can be illegal even when the offender and victim are of the same gender. Remarkable

that it took until 1998 for the idea that your boss credit carding you in the hallway. So in 1997 he's like, hey if you were a gay guy you're just touching it up. However much you want.

Take it to the court, chief. But, yeah, I guess this is good because you want equality in all areas, and now you are equal in the eyes of the court there. Today's birthdays, although we have one wedding on this date, when in 2016, Rupert Murdoch married model Jerry Hall. She was 59. She was formerly married to Mick Jagger. Correct.

And he was 84. Is he still alive? He is still alive. If you recall, he recently got engaged and then called it off like within three months. Maybe not even that. It doesn't sound like you recall. No, I don't. Maybe not even that. It doesn't sound like you recall. No, I don't. We did that story.

Just because he was, like, you know, succession-ish. Today's birthdays, we have Tom Greaves, 76. Glenn Humplick, his assistant. He's absolutely on my Griffey list. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. For sure. You're familiar

with the Griffey Bonds list? Oh yeah. Come on. Yeah. That's classic. But for those who aren't just a reset just to lay it

on the podcast it's it's kind of like a It's a level of confidence or lack of confidence that you would have that somebody would be involved in something nefarious, particularly as it relates to sexual deeds. With Ken Griffey, we all would have been crushed, surprised, heartbroken if we found out that he dabbled in steroids.

With Barry Bonds, we knew basically from the entire time that he was a giant, this guy's on steroids. So Tom Grieve, Griffey. Cosby is a Griffey. Cosby, I mean. You think he was a Griffey? It's not fail safe. For sure.

He was a Griffey unless you knew about the Spanish fly bit. That's true. Which was in a stand-up routine of his. Which I found incredible that that preceded the Cosby show. Right. If you grew up with him on your TV as Theo Huxtable, not Theo, whatever his name was, Dr. Huxtable. Then you're Griffey.

But Louis C.K. was always a Bonds. Sure. Yeah, you kind of looked at him like, yeah. Yeah, you could probably. Okay, here's another. There's something deviant about him. Louis C.K. Bonds, Larry David Griffey. Sure. Yeah, you kind of looked at him like, yeah. Yeah, you could probably. Okay, here's another. There's something deviant about him. Louis C.K. Bonds, Larry David Griffey.

Yeah. You think so? I think so. Let's do that. Yeah. Just because he seems like asexual. Yeah, it doesn't seem like he'd be too anyone. Right.

But Tom Grieve, absolutely a Griffey. No doubt. It would crush me. Dave Raymond? Bontz. He's got some game. We're just going

through the whole booth. Jared Sandler? Griffey. Absolutely. Soon-to-be-former-cowboy Michael Gallup is 28 nick castellanos is 32 wow boy could have done that for the open of the break it's always another day played unedited now

unedited now. That's true. We could do that. Hypothetically. It's not us. No. We're just reporters. Has that word been said?

No. On the potty. We're getting there. Jay Gruden is 57. Man. Fighting with RG3 on Twitter now. Like consistently. There's a really funny photo of him outside of a bar in Washington, D.C. when he was the coach.

And he's doing the thing where you sit up against like a wall. Like this type move right here. Which is like the most beaten thing you can do, you know? Like on the ground, you're just smoking a cigarette. Wow. Like a Ben Affleck? Exactly. Sort of like that, except he's sitting down.

That's awesome. Where is he? Twitter. He's not in the game anywhere? He's not Division II coach? He didn't start OC-ing the Giants or something? No, I don't think so. I mean, he probably collects a check as like an analyst.

Draymond Green is 34. Here's my sports question for you, Mr. Basketball. Would Draymond Green be a Hall of Famer if he was drafted by Memphis? Probably not. No way. Because he's certainly thought of as a first ballot Hall of Famer. Right now. Is that because of the championships or because

of the stats? because of the stats? Well, the stats aren't exactly great. Yeah. But it's how he's meshed with that particular team. Like, it's just the absolute perfect storm for him. Yeah. Like, he'd still be a... Good player. Very good player.

Like, is he even ever an all-star? Oh, yeah. Okay. Just during that run. Was he ever all-defense? Like, now he even ever an all-star? Oh, yeah. Okay. Just during that run. Was he ever all-defense? Like, now he's not. Yeah, he was that for sure. Like, he's not a current all-star.

No. 2022 was the last time, but he has been NBA defensive first team four times and second team four more times. McKelty Williamson is 67. Don't know it. I have written here, Con Air guy with diabetes. Oh, wow. Okay.

The old guy? No, the black guy. Yeah. I didn't remember the diabetes part. Well, that was the thing is he had to get his medicine. Oh, yeah. And they couldn't get it to him. That was like the diabetes part. Well, that was the thing, is he had to get his medicine. Oh, yeah. And they couldn't get it to him. That was like the whole...

Yeah. The reason, right? He was very good friends with Cameron Poe. Yeah. Patricia Heaton is 66. I think his final line was, Yeah, pretty funny, huh, bitch? And then that's what...

Good memory. Sid the Virus turns around and shoots bitch? And then that's what... Good memory. Sid the Virus turns around and shoots him. No, that's funny! It's Cyrus the Virus. Cyrus the Virus. Sid the Virus doesn't exactly roll off the tongue. Sid the Vid. Patricia Heaton.

What TV mom was she? Everybody loves Raymond, right? Oh, yeah. Is that? Okay. Fan. Oh, yeah. Is that? Okay. Fan. Yeah, pretty hot. They had a good run of TV moms.

Are they not doing it anymore? TV moms are great. Yeah, I guess all TV moms have always been hot. Yeah. I think of Meredith Baxter Burney for Family Ties. That's probably a little before your time. There's a couple. Then you move up to Raymond.

Yeah, like Tim the Tool Man's wife wasn't bad. Yeah, for sure. But there's a couple, obviously, that cut against the grain, namely Roseanne. Okay, yeah. Well. John Goodman wasn't really like. No, but neither was Kevin James. That's true.

And he was bagging ace. Patty Kensett is 56. Can I tell you, I don't even know where Roseanne took place, but in my mind, it was Ohio. Feels Ohio. Like every time I watched that show growing up, I was like, this is probably what Ohio's like. Very Midwest. You're right.

The dumpy basement. Yeah, basement, wood paneling. Beating people. Beating people. Patsy Kensett is the hot chick in Lethal Weapon 2. Ooh. From South Africa. And then we have...

She was able to outrun quite a few bullets. I watched that movie recently, as you know. Rick Perry is 74. Ah. Adios. Had a ranch. Is he the original Adios mofo? Yeah.

Okay. Man, the audio of him talking about cutting the Department of Energy, that's just... I wonder if we could pull that up. Just kiss. Maybe for tomorrow. And he just goes, oops. Fine that, Blake. He was out of his depths a little bit then.

Dancing with the Stars, by the way. What's that, when he was running for president? Yeah. Yeah. It was one of president? Yeah. Yeah. It was one of the Republican debates. Yeah. Where Trump is just bodying. So, you're probably going to say this is insane when I tell you this.

So, Rick Perry, it's his birthday, died on this day. Luke Perry. That is insane. I could have never imagined that would happen. He said he wanted to make it to Rick Perry's birthday. And he did. Quote, unquote. Weren't you a big 90210 guy?

Yeah, sure. Yeah. I mean, I'm not judging. Yeah, no. I've never really met anybody who watched it. A little Melrose Place, a little 90210. Speaking of cultural moments in TV, right? What's that?

90210 was huge. Yeah, and it did feel like that was kind of an era. That from there led to the CW and Dawson's Creek. Yeah. Yeah, where everybody could watch rich kids in high school have sex and deal with their problems. The OC came out, yeah. Also died on this day, we have John Candy. Dude, shockingly young.

Died at the age of 43. Yeah, but didn't you... When you watched John Candy in a movie... Oh, you didn't... Eight years before he died, you were like, oh, this guy's probably 50 now. Yeah, yeah. But he was like 37.

Yeah. No go, Blake? No, there's just no clear evidence that this is going to be in this video. All right, well, we'll watch. We'll say now that we're going to research it and video. Alright, well we'll watch. We'll say now that we're going to research it and play it tomorrow and we'll just forget. And then, born

in this day, not alive anymore. We have Gilbrandt. He died last year. Was he living to? And that was today in history. For 90 living to die for 90 years. That's great.

So anyway, let me see. Wait, 70. Yeah, he was 90-something. Crazy. Closing remarks from Ethan. What do you think of the den? These aren't your closing remarks. Now I'm just asking you.

This is just question time. Have you ever, what did you envision it it i actually envisioned it a little smaller than it is because you guys just keep saying how small it is but i walked i didn't i didn't envision this whole computer area over here yeah that that's new okay it used to be a different area but yeah that's i love i mean video man has said i up. I could spend all day and not see everything in here, so it's really cool. It's fun. This is a dream come true. Okay, that was just a question.

Okay. Now, closing remarks. I made a list on my notes app, by the way. I like that. This was coming, so just going to fire these down. Nardwar, awesome. Thanks, Jake. Thank you. Okay, I down. Nardwar, awesome. Thanks, Jake. Thank you.

Okay. I got a Nardwar fan. We got, if you haven't, How To Basic, Classic YouTube, and Cartnarks. You got to look up Cartnarks. Is it people? Is it like grocery? It's the people that are like stopping people from leaving carts, not in the turnstile. Okay.

I've seen that. Have you? It's so funny. Is it the, he sounds gay? Yeah, a little bit, yeah. Or, I'm sorry. Effeminate? Don't take this wrong, Blake.

Hey, I've gotten it too. He could sound like a fun Blake, right? Like he's just a little more fun. Gay and boring. No, just like a More of a He said fun Blake Hey what you doing there No but he's comparing

I'm putting the magnet On your car That's a regular Blake though Youth ministry Yeah Yeah it's Youth ministry Is a great way to put it

That's He's perfect You should watch that It's really funny No I just pulled it up though And then how to basic Is just One of my faves

Oh Mr. Grumpy Pants Like the guys Will be chasing him pissed that he's... Yeah, he calls him Lazy Bones all the time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then, real quick, Blake's intros. I support you, Parks and Rec. This is how you eat it. Quality.

Thank you. PB on waffles with syrup. Big fan. Huge fan. God, even just hearing it. Brother talks squirting. I'm a big front parking guy, not back-end parking guy. I feel like back-end parking guys are just showing off. They are.

That's all the optics. And then I did a four-day work week thing with my job for about 10 months. Did you hate it? It was okay, but I'll just say this. It's not as cool. That day you have off when you're just say this. It's not as cool. That day you have off when you're just sitting alone, it's kind of depressing. So you have 10-hour days?

No, no, no. Four? Eight-hour, four-day work week. Just basically cut it down for a little while. We tried it. There were some problems. We went back, but it wasn't as awesome as I thought it would be. What day did you get off? Me, it was Friday.

I feel like I would stack that with stuff I could get done, though. I try. Yeah, I would do yard work. That was like the one thing. And then Saturday, you're not having to do anything. So it was a little bit beneficial. And last thing, I used to work at A&M Athletics, and I knew Coach Banks. He was awesome.

I just want to say that. Monkey. Monkey Coach. Yeah, Monkey Coach. Yeah, he sounds Banks. He was awesome. I just want to say that. Monkey. Yeah, monkey coach. Yeah, he sounds awesome. He was awesome. I never really had a doubt. He was the chillest of all the coaches. It was some of his staff. Like he's dating a stripper and he has a monkey? Yeah.

You had to tell us he was awesome? But he was just the chillest. He was the guy that put his feet up. He was like, hey, what's up? Way cooler than all the other coaches. I heard he's hey, what's up? You know, way cooler than. I heard he's an awesome recruiter, too. Yeah, they always said that. The best.

For sure. Which, again, makes sense. Yeah, he was awesome. Boy, he delivered. Yeah, he did. I got a lot of. Thanks, Ethan. Yeah.

Good times. Thanks for the website. All right. Adios, mofo. No puppy. No puppy. No puppy. No puppy. No puppy. No puppy. No puppy.

No puppy. No puppy. No puppy. No puppy. No puppy. No puppy. No puppy. No puppy. No puppy.

No puppy. No puppy. No puppy. No puppy. No puppy. No puppy. No puppy. No puppy.

No puppy. No puppy. No puppy. No puppy. No puppy. No puppy. No puppy. No puppy. No pop it, no puppet A puppet, no puppet A puppet, you're a puppet No puppet, no puppet No puppet No puppet

No puppet No puppet