The Dumb Zone FREE - The Dumb Zone 4-25-24

Episode Date: April 25, 2024

Hear all of our episodes by subscribing to our Patreon - Patreon.com/TheDumbZoneThe Dumb Zone crew, Dan McDowell and Jake Kemp, with the ever-resourceful Blake Jones, are back with another episode that's sure to tickle your funny bone and maybe even make you ponder the absurdities of life. This time, Dan's about to hit the airwaves with The Freak, and he's considering some outrageous antics to spice up his appearance. Will he go shirtless, or does he have an even wilder trick up his sleeve?Meanwhile, the guys dive into the curious case of a wheelchair that isn't quite what it seems, and they unpack the hilarity of a wrestler's brutally honest post-match interview. From the ridiculousness of "alpha male" TikTokers to the discovery of a time capsule that's disappointingly predictable, it's clear that the only constant in The Dumb Zone is the unpredictable.And let's not forget the birthdays, including a wrestling coach who might just be the next big thing in motivational speaking, and a certain infomercial legend who's managed to survive against all odds. As always, the episode wraps up with Dan and Jake's signature blend of wit and whimsy, leaving you with just the right amount of dumb to brighten your day.So, if you're looking for a podcast that blends sports, sarcasm, and the occasional serious moment, tune in to The Dumb Zone. It's the perfect antidote to the mundane, and it's all served with a side of laughs. Remember, life's too short for bad vibes, so sit back, relax, and let The Dumb Zone take you on a wild ride through the dumbest parts of life. (00:00) - Open (32:26) - Sports: Jerry isn't make sense (56:37) - Viewer Mail (01:09:21) - Matt Bruenig (01:44:57) - News (01:58:52) - Today in History ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Hello, I'm Dan McDowell, longtime professional broadcaster. Why subscribe to our Patreon podcast? Well, perhaps you support our struggle to get out from under the oppressive thumb of the man. Or, objectively, if you sign up at patreon.com slash the dumb zone, you'll get the two episodes per week that are available on all podcast platforms, like this one, plus an additional two episodes each week that are exclusive to Patreon. So subscribing on Patreon gets you four episodes per week. Oh my, what a bargain. Now, on to today's program.

The Dunza, Dunza, Dunza. Good evening and welcome to the first and maybe only racial draft here in New York City. Folks, this is for all the marbles. What happens here will state the racial standing of these Americans once and for all. That's right. And the crowd is here to support their races. Well, Rob, some of the biggest names in sports and in entertainment are on the line tonight.

And I'm excited to see who's going to be drafted by which race. Seated behind me on the stage there are the various representatives. And believe it or not, the blacks have actually won the first pick. Wow, that's the first lottery a black person's won in a long time, Billy. Yes, and they'll probably still complain. Man, f*** you. Best Chappelle skit ever? Man, it's got to be up there.

It's got to be up there. Not even the only hilarious Bill Burr draft-related bit. Oh, that's right. Yeah. We could do that tomorrow. He's got his stand-up. They're going to have the whole list. Well, speaking of that, we have a very special program for you today.

In this new medium, we've discovered you can kind of do things longer form. Sure. So what if we mock draft the entire draft? Okay, yeah. But also, I was also thinking how we can attempt to be more creative and just take shots. What if we start at Mr. Irrelevant? And work back. And we go backwards.

Okay. No one's thought of that. So each one of us will go through our draft pick. So there's going to be three mocks when we're done with this whole thing. Okay. That's a terrible idea. I thought it'd be really interesting because then we could say, oh, this is from a trade, and then you'd have to go explain that later.

Kind of reverse engineering. The four late round picks the Cowboys got for their first round. It is funny that we used to play that Bill Burr clip as our open, where it's like, who watches the draft? What a waste of time. And then I'm like, all right, well, I'm going to be here until midnight covering the draft. Yeah, all of us.

Day one is fun. I stand corrected once again by the NFL. You know how I'm against every expansion they do of every bit. Just turning 12 months into... Yeah, but opening night they made on a Thursday. I'm like, oh, that's not... That's the way my grandpa taught me to watch NFL football on a Sunday. I used to complain, I guess, because of the fantasy team.

Now I've got to remember it a little early. And now I'm totally on board. I'm totally on board with the round one on primetime because it didn't used to be, correct? Oh, definitely not. No. I'm on board with just the NFL. Everything they do is fine

except for that kneeling. Yeah, the kneeling. Yeah, the anthem thing was tough. I'm actually like not that fired up about it. Just because the Cowboys are probably going to trade down? Yeah, and they'll take a lineman, and it just feels

like just getting walloped by Green Bay after getting curb stomped by San Francisco. I'm just like, not that into the NFL right now. Am I wrong? No, you're right. You're right. I feel like we've got Mavs.

Everything besides the Cowboys right now excites me. Did you see the biggest sports news of the day, though? Perhaps the year... I heard OJ died. Perhaps the millennium... Is that a thousand years? What is that?

Anyway, it's very, very big news, but we did it. He did it. Sports Mayor has finally landed that team. Remember, he's been working it was the Tampa Bay Devil Rays.

Yeah. For some time. I think he was trying to pitch them on the fact that we could have a Major League team move to... The Chargers. Downtown Dallas. The Chargers. I think were on his target list. Very recently, he noted the fact that the Chiefs lost their stadium votes to renovate their stadium.

Bring them home. And we could bring, yes, the Dallas Texans. Dallas Texans?. Bring them home. And we could bring, yes, the Dallas Texans. Dallas Texans? Correct. Back home. But those have all fallen short, but we got the white whale. Yeah. Let me just take a look at

Sports Mayor on Twitter so I can get this absolutely correct. Because Sports Mayor, that's what he does. Mayor Eric Johnson. Yeah. He seems to be very concerned with sports and sports adjacent things. And he announced today.

I don't know. I'm not really a fan. Wait. That's Max Scherzer. We're holding that for later. Wait, that's Max Scherzer. We're holding that for later. Today, the Dallas City Council approved a 15-year agreement for the Dallas Wings. Wow, yeah, that's huge.

That's absolutely. We brought them home. It's always bothered me. Yeah. When you see the, you see the Dallas skyline. Yep. When we're watching a Wings game. Yep.

But they actually play in Arlington, I think. Where do they play? UTA? You know, what's weird about it is they have the first pick in the draft tonight. Are they always picking in the top five? Is there a draft tonight? I just made that up. Oh, okay.

There might have been. I believed you. They kind of have a draft every couple weeks, it feels like, and the finals. Yeah. And then they don't play the day between the All-Star Game and the Home Run Derby. So that's a missed opportunity for them. You can't convince me they don't have two seasons a year. It's like soccer.

Yeah. Like there's always a soccer. There's never just like one thing. It's always a championship. Yeah. Oh, no, no. This is the tournament. It's possibly a cycle.

Yeah. Yeah. Oh, that was a period joke. I totally found it I was getting there in my head anyway we're not broadcasting from

high atop my garage today live to tape we're not even in our studio which is in downtown Dallas that's all we can say stop asking us but we'll tell you off the air.

Yeah, then you can just tell everybody else. Yeah. We are at a home. This is a 690 traveling road show. And it is quite intimidating. It is. Because it seems like there's 50

people here. Yeah. It's a lot of people. We got dudes. We've got a few ladies. Whose house is this? Because Jason has written on the form. Who are you? You want to come over to the mic for a second?

Or do you hate when the 690 guys get on the mic? Is this a split this up? Like, did you just charge people, you know, five bucks each to get in and then you're making money on this deal? That's right. That's what we should do. What's your bit? So our bit is our buddies turned 40 about a month ago and we thought.

All right. A month ago. Okay. I guess that's a. Yeah. Throw a dart. This could. I guess that's a, yeah. Throw a dart. This could be early, early birthday for next year.

So we were sitting around with, uh, you know, had a few, a few beers and decided we wanted to, you know, we should do, they did send their,

we should go do a dumb zone. You got a credit card. Awesome. Exactly. Yeah. Just call this email Blake right now. That explains why I got the Venmo at 1.30 in the morning. That's right.

And so you wanted to turn it around quick, but then, of course, we were booked up. Sure. Yep, that's right. Blake is pushing them out. In fact, I heard from somebody the other day, he said, oh, yeah, Blake said we can't get in until July. That's true. I'm like, I don't think so.

I don't think that's true. It is true. Really? Yeah. You're all booked. We're booking August now don't think so. I don't think that's true. It is true. Really? Yeah. You're all booked? We're booking August now. Wow. Wow.

You guys are popular. Wow. I think it's mostly you, Blake. Totally. There's no emails that say more Dan. Now, Clay will rock a five-inch inseam on you. Yes. Sorry.

It looks great. I'm in the process of purchasing a new bathing suit. Uh-huh. And I'm having to decide right now. Like five, the wife's like, I like it. And I'm like, but I don't know if I'm going to. Did you try it on? I have a five.

Oh, okay. Yeah, and I just feel like I'm not. Joe Kemp loves the five. He might go three. He's got some tiny shorts on him. Yeah, but he can pull it off. Yeah. Not saying you can't, but Joe looks great. But I don't know, five, seven?

It's like hot people look great in everything. They're like, oh, I should wear that. That looks good on me. Well, he's Clay. Yeah. A very attractive man. Yeah, I think Clay's got it going. So, yeah, the wife likes him, but definitely a little too short for me.

Okay, yeah. Play a lot of golf, keeps the legs cool. You have baby? We have baby. Okay, I was in the bathroom and just noticed the baby. There was a baby in there? Yeah, there's a baby. You forgot it.

We have two baby. There's the baby gate. They're not the baby proofed. Because I was baby. There's the baby gate. They're not the baby proofed. Because I was trying to get in the medicine cabinet. Yeah. Yes. Where are all the pills?

Yeah. We locked them out for baby and Dan. Yeah, we have two babies, three and one-year-old. They are not here. You guys are welcome. They're at daycare. But, yeah, we definitely share a lot of empathy with what you guys deal with and talk about all day long. So we love that a lot.

So you guys like doing it. Yep. Every two years. Yeah, we joked about how I broke Kelly's leg last night. So she'll wear a leg brace today, but she's not wearing it right now. Okay. Way to go. Congrats. Okay. Way to go. Congrats.

And yeah, your thoughts on the whole Dallas Wings situation? It's pretty exciting, isn't it? You live in Dallas. I'm so glad they're resurrecting the Memorial Auditorium. You just won't have to drive that far anymore. Where is the Memorial Auditorium? Isn't it basically just Kay Bailey?

Yeah. Is it? Yeah, I think so. Isn't that where the Beatles played in 1950? Wait, they're going to play at Kay Bailey the convention center? Yeah, there's like a, well, it's not separate, but... They're playing at Memorial Auditorium.

That's their contract. Okay. Yeah. You always gave us kicks. Yeah, you're Clark. Oh, gosh, yeah. I can't understand what anybody's saying. My wife is from Des Moines. So we...

Oh, okay. A lot of Iowa. Kaylin Clark. A lot of Iowa sports. Component. Okay. Okay. Well, congratulations on Kaylin.

I don't know. How do we wrap this up? How about congrats on the house? Congrats on the house. This is a badass house. Fantastic house. How do we keep doing this? I know't know. How do we wrap this up? How about congrats on the house? Congrats on the house. This is a badass house. Fantastic house. How do we keep doing this? I know.

Yeah. We just keep getting booked by guys hotter than us with better houses than us. Because I was thinking as I was- Just over and over and over. As I was looking at my third broken sprinkler head this morning, I thought, should we put like a shout out and just say, hey, I want to hire a listener who fixes sprinklers. Right. You know, not a freebie.

We want to pay, but we'd like to support those who support us, that kind of thing. But it doesn't seem like any of the houses we've been to would be guys who repair sprinklers. No.

Unless like they own the company where they employ other guys. There are guys who pull the levers of the economy. We have a guy. No. Unless they own the company where they employ other guys. There are guys who pull the levers of the economy. We have a guy. Yeah, they all have a guy. So, funny story, our next door neighbor is not here, but he'll be here in a minute.

And then several others in this room all live literally within a block or two of here. That's not that funny of a story. Well, we're all like good friends. Okay, I thought you were leading somewhere. No, Jake's right then. I think Jake's right.

Not funny. We call it the compound. We've got a bunch of... It's a beautiful home. Up here. Thank you, guys. It's a beautiful home. Yeah.

So glad for you guys to be here. We love everything that you guys are doing. Okay. Well, you guys all just sit and stare at us. Well, we guys all just sit and stare at us. And that's what we enjoy. I understand you have some Cane Rosso coming for us. So we're very excited about that. We're big fans. Of course.

People have beverages. Beverages. Yeah, we're doing a lot of early drinking today, huh? Why not? Doesn't today feel like a Friday? It does. You know, that's going to suck tomorrow. After yesterday.

We businessed on Business Wednesday. Very hard. Yeah. Did y'all? We had the business jeans on. So you knew it was serious. Yeah.

Yeah, you clearly are just kind of in relax mode with your tiny little five inch. It feels like Friday. It does. Yeah, it's going to be weird to...

And here's the other thing. The reason I feel like today feels like Friday for me is there's only like two weeks left of school, but the teachers at the school that I pay a lot of money to, they're off tomorrow and Monday. What for? Oh, is it like snow day?

You know, I don't know. I think they're calling it like... In-service day? In-service day. Exactly. I don't even know what that means, but I'm like, okay. At the school that you pay a lot of money for? Man, we don't have that at our pay a lot of money for school.

Really? Yeah. They have a lot of them. The school my wife works at had like a snow day in the bank, but they didn't use it. So they took off. I think I might have told you about this. It was the Friday of the eclipse week. Instead of just being off of the eclipse? Why didn't use it. So they took off. I think I might have told you about this. It was the Friday of the Eclipse week. Instead of just being off to the Eclipse.

Like, why didn't you take off Monday? Yeah. Because they don't ask me about anything. But yeah. Because I wanted to say happy holidays, and they were like, we're done listening to this guy. We don't like that. We got to say Merry Christmas.

Merry effing Christmas. But yeah, so no school tomorrow, no school Monday. Well, I thank you for having us here and stuff. Absolutely. We are honored. Thank you guys for coming.

Okay, is there going to be a fight for closing remarks? Oh, yeah. Or do you get it because it's your house? We may make Mr. 40 do it. Oh, okay, yeah. We're here to honor a guy somehow turning 40. Or do you get it because it's your house? We may make Mr. 40 do it. Oh, okay, yeah. We're here to honor a guy somehow turning 40.

Why does your shirt say, Eat Shit Derek? Whoa. See if it makes sense. See if it makes a day. Is that a Step Brothers line? Oh, okay, yeah. Sorry, I don't know, dude.

Do you think anybody noticed my Step a popular line from that movie. my stepbrother's Easter egg in the video? A couple people actually pointed it out, yeah. Oh, they did? Yeah. Okay. You know what? If I could just say

That was awesome, dude. What a jerk. Why does everybody hate me? Anyway, I wanted to talk real quickly about Business Wednesday and the fact that we got done with Business Wednesday. And man, did we accomplish some things. We did. We do have this new little behind-the-scenes talk,

which we did on the 42020 show if you want to go watch that show on the tube did you put out the audio on it or no i did oh okay so it is available on audio i had a guy say hey i never watch any of your videos um why don't you post that 420 show like on audio and i go all right so that's how easy it is to get us to do things for you yeah maybe suggest it and then if uh blake can do it it to get us to do things for you. Yeah. Maybe suggest it. And then if Blake can do it, it'll get done. Dan and Jake are not taking care of that. That's very true. But so I wanted to contact Blake.

And as you know. We got to turn this off. Like I just. You really have to turn it off. I'm so distracted. Oh, they're watching sports on the TV? Shaq was holding up a grand in $100 bills like it was a phone, and he was talking to it.

Yeah. Okay, I think we need to find that audio. I thought you were going to say we got to turn this off because I was going to reveal where you were yesterday because I wanted to get a hold of Blake. What? Did you check my location? So I wanted to get a hold of Blake. What? Did you check my location? So I wanted to get a hold of Blake.

This is why I don't share. Because we have a lot of interesting, some big news, some big stuff's happening. And I didn't realize, I thought Business Wednesday meant the show is kind of working. So that's me, you. Video Man was there. Who else? Well, I mean, we did have lawyers and CPAs and accountants and all this kind of stuff, bookkeepers. But yeah, Blake, I don't know.

He was nowhere to be found. So I'm like, I need to get a hold of Blake. These are some important things. We got to get moving on these things now. When you're a small business, there aren't days off. No. You know? There's maybe part of the days off, but you got to get going, man.

So I do check your location. I don't often. That's good to know. But I wanted to get a hold of you, and sometimes I don't want to bother you if you are doing something. And I know you do it as well because I heard when I was in France that you said you liked looking and seeing

that I was in Amsterdam or you liked looking and seeing that I was at the Louvre. Yeah, I liked seeing your picture at the Louvre. Yeah. So I checked Blake's location yesterday and I see he is

right next, or he's right between the Gorilla House and the world of primates. Where could that be? And he was there for a long, long time. Because I kept, I'd go back and check in an hour. I'd check an hour later. I'd check an hour later.

He was at the Fort Worth Zoo yesterday. We took a half day. Oh. Took Brooks to the zoo? What, like midnight to 5 a.m.? Which half? Yeah, I was going to say. Was your work time?

No, I mean, I didn't get any invites for any meetings. So I just thought, ah, they don't need me today. So I did my social media stuff in the morning. Got the audio out for the 420 event and just thought, if they need me, they don't need me today. So I did my social media stuff in the morning, got the audio out for the 420 event, and just thought, if they need me, they'll buzz me. And so, yeah, I took my kids to the zoo. I just didn't want to bother you when you were having family time. I know that's precious to you.

I appreciate that. I did. Oh, you did? You called them? Yeah. Did he say, God, hey, I'm at the zoo. How was the zoo? Let's get a full report. Here's Blake at the zoo. How was the zoo? Let's get a full report.

Here's Blake on the zoo. Do they have the mom that rejected the kid? I don't know. When you first walk in, there's the gorilla enclosure. And the first thing I thought of is we watched the video of that trainer in the exhibit. And I was like, oh, that's where she hid. That's where the gorilla came out and ran. And then, like, oh, that's where she hid. That's where the gorilla came out and ran.

And then, yeah, then I thought of C-section gorilla. Do you think they could get more? That's not what they call her. Would that be a good selling point? Like if once a day, one of the trainers runs into the gorilla enclosure and has to get away. Of course. And they're wearing the Mr. Freeze costume

from the Braves. Like, and this guy is so fast. Yeah, I think. And if you can get away, then you get like a prize. Oh, okay. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know. How about if you get away, you get to live?

Yeah, that's probably step one. You know, for for thousands of years, this was kind of like the main version of human entertainment. What? Just people being able to get away from animals. Trying to escape or trying to kill animals? Yeah, I mean, the Romans would put like a rhinoceros in there. Really?

Yeah, well, yeah, for sure. Just to see what happens. Okay, so they kind of started with the dog and they're like, oh, that was too easy. Let's ramp this up a little bit. Yeah. And then when your bleeding heart liberals like us would complain about that,

they would start doing it just with prisoners or criminals. Right. Like they were going to kill anyway. The woke of the day in 1400 or whenever. That's probably not right. Yeah, we're at a good age with Brooks at the zoo. He kind of knows all the animals and will point out and tell you what sound they make and is very entertained by it.

And Wednesdays is half price, so I thought it was a good time to go. You know what? Blake is always looking for the deal. Yeah. I I thought it was a good time to go. You know what? Blake is always looking for the deal. I don't know if you know that about him. That's how he swindled us. He'll get your movie app. Oh my god, did he swindle us. I had something interesting happen to me a couple days ago in my neighborhood. So I

am now two dog person. I was one dog person forever. I had a German Shepherd, have a German Shepherd. And then do you kind of remember the bit about how my brothers-in-laws are kind of good for nothing? I do remember you trash talking your wife's family quite a bit, yes. Well, it's not a joke. Okay, well, I didn't think it was.

And that's why you look better, right? Yeah. To your wife. Yeah. So they kind of did this thing where marriage is struggling a little bit. What should we do? Let's have another kid. That didn't work.

What should we do now? Let's have another one. That didn't work. How about this? How about we get two dogs and we don't have a yard? So now I've got to take one of the dogs. Have to? To try to help them out. I got a big backyard. It's not much for me. Did your wife suggest that? Yeah, of course. Okay. Yeah. Because I didn't want the dog. Yeah. So this dog is not trained in the least bit. And so I'm playing with Brooks. What kind of dog? It's a great Pyrenees and Husky mix.

That sounds big. It's giant. It's got a lot of fur. Doesn't listen to a damn word I say. So it sheds. Nobody says fur when they're talking about dogs. Hair, fur. What is it?

Hair? Yeah, does anybody say dog fur? Am I wrong about this? Dog hair. Sure, sure. I'm wrong. Okay,? Am I wrong about this? Dog hair. Sure, sure. I'm wrong. Okay, he says I'm wrong. He gets out.

Okay. Which is a huge problem because it's not like, hey, come back. Again, doesn't listen to me. Not out just the backyard. You're saying he got out. Yeah, he got out of the backyard

and is like running through our neighborhood. Yeah, in our neighborhood. And so now it's a game. That sounds lucky to me. Just let him roll. Oh, no. Yeah. So he starts running, and then there are kids outside.

There are people outside, and there's this ginormous dog running around. And the closer I get to it, the more he runs away. Of course. So it's just a game of chicken here. Yeah. But the problem is I can never get in front of him. He's always just pushing towards the main road. Again,

I'm not sure this is the worst thing in the world. So I run, I don't, I don't know how far neighborhood, maybe half mile. I'm chasing this dog out, trying to get ahead of it. And anytime I do get ahead of it,

like he's sniffing around or something, he'll just run across the street. And so I can never catch him. And so then I eventually push him out into the main road, and I'm like, F it, fine, gone, see ya, not my problem anymore. But then cars honk at him, and he comes back into the neighborhood. So I corner him in between these two houses and their fences, and now we have a standoff.

It's a one-on-one, and I've got to make an open field tackle. Oh. Yikes. Now, I've been playing with this dog for a few days so I know his move. Mm-hmm. He's going to cut one way

and juke back the other. Of course. I know what's coming. Yeah. And yeah, I had it read perfectly. So he faked right, went left,

and I just effing tackled this dog. Oh my gosh. You'd watch the tape. Yeah, I'd watch the tape. So it had been raining. So now I'm in this mud wrestling fight with this stupid dog. It's no

good. And so yeah, then I had to pick him up by the back of his neck and just like carry him back to my house. But the whole neighborhood had come out. How did he get a dog just foisted on him? Sounds terrible. Is it like not that old too? You're going to have this for many years? Yeah, he's two. Oh my god.

If I don't kill him before then. Here's the thing. He's telling us about this dog. He hasn't even used its name. Yeah, does it have a name? Well, they gave it a name, but I don't like the name. So we're trying a new name. It's not sticking. What did they give it? Bolt. Which is fitting

for him. Why did you take this from a kid's TV show, right? Sure. You've just taken a decade of your life. It wasn't my call. The hair or the fur or whatever,

all over the house, vacuuming. I'm just trying to be a nice guy. It's a big dog pushing down your kid. Yeah, he'll definitely do that. So yeah, this big show of all the neighbors around. You got dog conflict with the other. Yeah, you got dog cucked, dude. Yeah.

Yeah. You got dog cucked. I remember. Go ahead. So something he did while he was running around is he pooped in a neighbor's yard. Oh, no. And it's a big dog, so you got's a giant dog so yeah but i am like out of breath my adrenaline is on high i just mud wrestled this dog would seem like that'd be an easy time to get him though first poop for no

yeah while he's going to the bathroom like blake couldn't but he was already like 10 houses up okay and so i'm covered in mud i got scratches all over me because he fought with me, and I'm carrying him by the back of his neck, and the neighbor said, hey, you're going to come back for this, right? Oh, man. And if I had just like any just dignity, I would have just told him where to go. But then I just walked my ass over there and picked up his –

H-E double hockey sticks is what you're saying, right? How about wife walks over there and cleans that up? Like, she's the reason you're in this. Yeah, she wasn't much help. Where do you guys stand on throwing away the dog walk poop in somebody else's trash can? I'll do it if nobody's looking,

but I don't... In general, everybody... A lot of thumbs up. I'm against it. I'll do it if no one's looking, but I don't in general everybody a lot a lot of thumbs up i'm against it i'll do it if no one's looking but i don't like people doing it to mine because well you don't know if they're looking i know that's the problem the trash can though usually is i guess if they're all full that's not a bad bit yeah but what if but if it's empty and you just drop that right it's like it's 9 12 yeah you know and they had picked up at 8-55 and now.

Now it's in there for a week. Do you do it? I don't, but I think I should. Yeah. I think it should be okay, but I do not do that, no. You just carry it around for a mile? Or I just force my dog to... Eat it?

No, Blake. Hustle home. You can somehow push him away from going to the bathroom in the neighbor's yard? Yes. Oh. Okay, your dog is not as bad as we think. It's pretty much only you that hates my dog. No, you're always giving it a bad rap.

You said you hope it dies from its cancer or whatever it had growing in its head. Didn't it have like a big giant thing that exploded on you? What was it in its head? Whatever. It was a cyst. A cyst exploded on you, right? She's hanging on. It ruined a pair of your glasses.

That is actually true, yeah. I don't hate your dog, but I wouldn't want to have it living at my house. So if anyone wants a dog... We have two available, mine and his. Yeah. Yeah. All right.

Oh, before I get to sports, I did want to just mention, too, did you guys see Akash's on Rogan? I have not seen that. You already saw it? Yeah, yeah. The whole thing? Yeah.

Did he bring us up? Really, that's – oh, he didn't. Okay, well, I'll stop listening. No, I'm just kidding. I'm interested in what Akash has to say at all times, so I like to tune into some Akash Singh. But, dude, you're I like to tune in to some Akash Singh. But dude, you're not like five minutes in.

I don't know that, I don't do a lot of Rogan. Maybe you do. You probably do if you already watched the whole thing. But it's like five minutes in and he's playing the hits. He's on masks.

He's on vaxxing. He's like, I'm like, Joe or Akash? Joe! Oh, yeah. I'm just saying, right away, I feel like anytime I've heard Rogan,

he kind of gets into that stuff right away. Is that his whole... Does he only get people in so he can bounce his stuff off of them and they just kind of react? Because they weren't like, who's Akash? What have you done?

Oh, he's been on before. Yeah, I know, but still, not just a little news of the day or something. Is news of the day masks? I feel like we've passed through that and we're out on the other side where we don't debate this constantly. No, that's a good point,

but I do think his general bit is just like we're gonna talk about anything that people say that you're supposed to believe we're gonna question that okay so whatever i'm for that yeah yeah i mean at the premise yeah yeah i don't know i mean you're not a big rogan guy no because you're the king of not believing anything i think i i see the three hours and I don't want to do it. Yeah, that's just ridiculous. Who would possibly think that they could produce a podcast somewhere in the neighborhood of two and a half plus hours?

I mean, you'd have to have the biggest ego to think somebody is going to want to hear this. Yeah. You know what's funny, though, is that if you ever go back and watch his stand-up, it's really good. People joke about him and they're like, oh yeah, he's the Fear Factor guy

and he's the MMA guy. Oh no, I'm a Rogan fan overall. Dumbass opinions. It's interesting just the change in Rogan. But I was a big fan. We had him in studio. That's right. Yeah.

Have you heard his OJ bit? No. It's really long, so I was going to try to cut it down and make it like an open for us, but it's if you had to try to explain OJ Simpson to an alien. Okay. Or actually, it's if you ever had to try to explain

Kim Kardashian to an alien. Okay. Who is the most famous person on earth, arguably. And you would have to start with like, so, football. Yeah, because OJ played a part in why she's so famous. Yeah, you'd have to get to like OJ. So now you got to explain football. Yeah, you have to explain football and you have to explain when you have a lot of money

you marry a white woman. It's like I know alien. That's weird but Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You all look the same. Yeah. Yeah. Joe Rogan good stand up comedian. This is so Blake and time-stamping.

Do you even want to just mention the Mavs? Because our big sports today is Jerry Jones. But the Mavs did win, so that's pretty sweet. It was awesome, dude. Kawhi's back. I feel like Iron Eagle is feeling himself too much. Yep. Uh-oh. You with me?

Yeah, he's very over the top. He's now got some good pub, and we all like Iron Eagle, and blah, blah, blah. And now he's doing like Zoo El Cinder. That was a bit blah. And now he's doing like Zoo El Cinder. That was a bit much. With Zoo Box.

And then... It was his seventh point. And it was like the fourth quarter. Like, let's just slow down. But you obviously had that one in the holster and you had to use it. Very, very Nance.

Terrence Mann had to put back dunk. He's like, that's a man's dunk. Literally. Okay, we get it. He's like, that's a man's dunk. Literally. Okay, we get it. Okay. Yeah, it's tough. Tomorrow night,

I believe ESPN. Are you guys going? We are. Okay. Me and my little twink. Mm-hmm. Your little sports buddy. I think we're 0-2.

No, 1-1. We're 1-1. Are we doing the Rangers next Thursday? What? You had told me we were possibly going to a Rangers game. Yeah. Are we not supposed to mention that, or are we not doing it? Let's table that.

Okay, so we might. Yeah, we might. All right. I'm kind of trying to wait on the Mavs situation. Oh, to see what their scene is? Oh. Okay. They play Friday, Sunday, Wednesday.

You would think, because of the travel. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, we don't know yet? No. It's to be determined? Okay. Yeah, and I have a flag game at 2 on Sunday.

Can I skip a Mavs game? And I was offered tickets, no less. Oh, wow. I mean, obviously, you can TiVo a Mavs game. And I was offered tickets, no less. Oh, wow. I mean, obviously you can Tivo a Mavs game. Would you not be able to avoid the score? Tivo or God Squad? No, but I mean, would you not be able to avoid the score? Does that bother you?

I would not. I've never been good about that. Because you know I've avoided a Cowboy playoff game. Up until, like, you were on 35 South? Up until I went to Sonic and somebody spilled it. At Sonic? No, no, no.

But he's also had the experience where like it was on a billboard. Yeah. Yeah. With the car hop, just skates up. Hey, hey, cowboy's up 28-17.

It was like Favre. It was a cowboy. It was a long time ago, I think. Maybe it wasn't Favre. I don't know. It was the Packers, I think.

And my kids were little and we drove up to Sonic to get ice cream, and I had TiVo'd the game. Because I'm like dad of the year, like four years in a row. Of course. We all know that. Cover of the magazine, in fact. You guys ever seen that? That's right.

Yeah, yeah. He was on the cover of Dad Magazine. Well, Girl Dad Magazine. Dad Weekly. Girl Dad Weekly. Dad Magazine. Well, Girl Dad Magazine. Dad Weekly.

Girl Dad Weekly. Yes, we ordered ice cream and she said, how are you doing? And I said, because I'm a really friendly guy. Why are we small talking at Sonic? I don't know. She's looking for a tip.

She thinks most people probably want to talk. That's a word. She goes, how are you doing? I said, fine. How are you? That was my mistake. And she said, I'd be a lot better if the Cowboys didn't lose that playoff game today. Wow, she just ruined

the whole thing. Yeah. Yeah, well, it was a playoff game. And then I grabbed that tip out of her hand. That's your fault. Why? Playoff game. I avoided game seven of the NBA finals when the Cavs won.

That's unbelievable. Because I was at a softball tournament that day. You didn't see the Kyrie shot live? No. A softball tournament? My kid, we had a very dominant 12U softball team. Yeah, I heard about your recruiting. I was one of the best coaches

really in the history of... Best recruiters, from what I heard. Come on. Just do what you gotta do. That's all I know. What's the record? He used to drive over to my neck of the woods to pick up one of his pitchers. I would drive to South Fort Worth if her mom couldn't take her to the game.

Where the language has changed a little bit the further south and west you go. In fact, it was like the zoo exit. So you know how far that is. I'd pass Chisholm Trail. Okay. Did any of you guys ever think of that before he pointed it out?

Chisholm Trail is funny. I just had never thought of... You know it's funny, right? Yeah, thanks. Okay. It just had never occurred to me. I grew up here my whole life. I've been at Chisholm Trail Park. Are people like popping champagne? They have been all morning.

I guess that's the bingo card. Chisholm Trail hit and they popped the... Okay, so we are going to play a little bit of Cowboys audio here. And I can't believe we've made it to this point without you bringing Zeke up. What's the Zeke news? They had a meeting yesterday. I didn't know that.

Jane reported it. I did not know that. I feel like that gets sent to you as much as Hitler stuff. Man, I've been inundated with the FTC rules non-competes. That is true, too. Are no longer a thing. Yeah. And in fact, later today, we're going to talk to Matt Brunig, our labor lawyer, about that and other topics.

But I did not know. I did know that Zeke's been a thing. They've floating out there. But if they actually met. That's what Jane Slater reported yesterday that they actually met. That's incredible. Yeah. And it's funny because.

He's really back, isn't he? I want it for you. You know what? I mean, you get down there at the three, four yard line. Tiger had to WD on the fifth hole on Saturday. Des is like, where's my meeting? So they kind of brought him up unprompted. We feel great about what we've been in pre-agency.

All in. All in. All in. This is yesterday? Yeah. He's somehow still saying it? Yeah. Even though they did zero. Yeah, but he knows that people are mentioning it, so now he's like, again, he's doubling down on the message.

So he's like, how do I get in the headline of the paper? Right. I will say these words because everybody loves that. All in. All in. All in. All in. We're all in with these young guys coming on. By the way, his son knows that he's bullshitting. Yeah, he's just laughing like,

look at the line of these people. All in. All in. We're all in with these young guys coming on. And we're all in with this track. We got a funny Steven laugh there. No no he's definitely going full Beavis and we're all in with this draft and we're all in with knowing that you have to go you can't have we've had adjustments we talked about I saw some criticism someplace about

zeke and about paying zeke i don't do i need to raise the hands in this room of everybody that thought zeke should be on this football team when he had him when he was holding out but we had to adjust the contract which took away from money that could have gone to Tyra. He thinks that everybody thought the Zeke deal was awesome. Yeah. Are we saying, yes, if we go back in time, who is raising their hand that we need Zeke on this team? I don't think...

No one. I know we weren't. No. Like, literally everyone was like, that's a bad idea, man. Like, let him hold out. He'll come back. He's not going to sit out the season. Wasn't that around the Le'Veon Bell time, too?

When Le'Veon Bell sat out for a whole season? Yeah, it was around that time. It was either the year before or the year after. But yeah, nobody was like, boy, I hope they throw everything at Zeke to bring him back. Because it was... This guy's a dumbass. His contract was up in two years. He wasn't going to sit out for two years.

You had a lot of leverage at that point. Yeah. Zach was up in two years. He wasn't going to sit out for two years. You had a lot of leverage at that point. Yeah. Although Zeke had the leverage of, you know, that he had. This is the problem with the Cowboys being this middling, on the cusp team. They're good, but they're not great, but they're always kind of good. So you always have that hope. And they're kind of good. So if you take one part away from kind of

good, they might not even make the playoffs. But if you take one part away from great, then you're like, alright, we might still be great. We don't need to need you that much. Yes, but they're in that, if Zeke's not here, we might not make the playoffs. I can't have that.

That's why all these people can hold them up. Yeah. That's awesome. I may be a dummy. Well, I can't have that. That's why all these people can hold them up. That's awesome. I may be a dummy. Well, I certainly am. But I think Stephen created a word in this one. We want to draft a Dallas Cowboy offensive lineman that fits in the room with a Zach Martin, with a Tyler Smith, with a Terrence Steele. You want that guy that you pick to be a guy who's going to go in that room

and be accretive to what we're trying to get accomplished. What does that mean? It is a word? Yeah, what does it mean? Accretive? Incremental? Accretive, so

that adding another pick to the room means that the overall quality of the room gets better? Okay. I just had never heard that word before. Can you confirm that, Blake? Yeah. Both finance term, accretive, accretion, which refers to gradual or incremental growth. Yeah.

Look, like I said, I'm the dumbass here, but also there's like 12 others. My penis was accretive. No, this says growth. Oh, okay. Same, when the blood starts rushing there. After being in the pool. More all-in talk. And so I think our structure and our involvement at every level that we are in our process of getting personnel. Okay. I mean, we're already just—that's 15 seconds of just complete word salad, right?

The process is ideal for making good decisions I know what it's like to make a mistake because I'm going to be living with it 10 years from now sometimes you might be living with it 26 years from now

and will he be it 26 years from now and will he be living yeah whenever you 10 years from now happen to go home with a gate agent oh yeah okay that's right well no you're not living with it yeah you're uh you know you're sending it money every now and then 10 years from now i'm not just in here for a five-year session at gm and then gone uh so i know what it's like okay hold on this is this is how they justify why is it better to have jerry as gm because he learns yeah because he learns he morphs as time goes and yeah and if if he makes a mistake it's going to be on him. He's not about to get fired. And now what he is doing is he is passing this mentality down to little Stephen. And yeah, Stephen Jones will be the GM.

But if you think about it, though, business-wise, it's a great bit. If you were able to tell your wife constantly, do you want to find somebody else who hasn't made these mistakes? Right. I've made them. I've already made them. Well, and that's also-

So would you prefer- In theory, he learns, but the other thing that this happens is he doesn't actually learn, fully learn. He learns as far as his attention span that he will remember that he learned that. Then there's a moth. Then something else will happen, and he'll learn.

Butterfly, yeah. Drafting or trading up for, was it Moe Claiborne? You know, then you learn that you don't trade up. Not Moe Claiborne. The LSU. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, sorry. Is it Moe Claiborne?

Yeah, yeah. I was thinking about the Brandon Carr signing, which also was kind of failed. Okay, but I mean, you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, sorry. Is it Moe Claiborne? Yeah, yeah. I was thinking about the Brandon Carr signing, which also was kind of failed. Okay, but I mean, you know, the Randy Moss thing is pretty famous too. Like after, you know, he didn't like dealing with the Michael Irvin stuff, so I'm not going to draft a guy like that.

Oh, look, Randy Moss was great. Man, now I'm learning from the thing that I thought I learned from, but now I learned again. So let's go up and get Dez. Yeah. So I know what it's like to have to live with how you're doing. That bears on it.

With that in mind, I compare this to college and scholarships. All right. Okay. This sort of makes sense, but it is such a circuitous route. I just want you to strap in and kind of try to focus on what he's saying. that allowed you to get better players if you'd give that one five scholarships. Let's say you were limited to 30. But you had the ability to get the better players by giving five scholarships to that player. Well, you'd know that when you gave them the five, that that was going to limit you.

You weren't going to be able to have 30. You were only going to be able to have 26 on your team. Because you're giving away five just to get one guy. The salary cap? I think he's just talking about budgets. Imagine. Imagine if you had $30. When you pay somebody $5, now you have five less.

No, he said you'd have 26. You'd have 26. I don't know how he got that extra dollar. Yeah. It's just like, it's such a reverse engineered analogy, right? Yeah, but it's something that's very commonly known, right? Yeah, it's not. The salary cap is.

It's not complex. Nobody needs to compare it to a non-existent structure that exists in college football. Right. But every year, they do try to, I guess he's tired of saying the pie. Yeah, maybe. Is only so big. So people aren't really

getting that whole pie thing. Let me just describe it like you said, a non-existent. People like college football. Okay, let's just pretend college. Everyone knows

what a scholarship is. This is actually something we pulled up Tuesday live. Very weird. And it works. It absolutely works. There's a very reason why we're 24th out of 32 teams draft that we get to pick a player this time. Because we were the 24th best in the NFL, according to the rules.

And so we get to pick. Everybody gets to pick before us up to 24 and so that's what we're doing what that does is effectively create the competition in the game that we have right now it's called a salary cap all right so is he just like 101 ing us to what is the draft. And not even like accurately. Not even accurately at all. But yeah, let me explain to everybody here. Here's why we're picking later. This is why, and here's what it is.

Don't know if you know. Like, why do we pick in this order? Well, it's because of, you know, they're trying to have a competitive balance, blah, blah, blah. Like you said, it's actually not. It's actually backwards um but also just the fact that he feels like he needs to say this at all one more time and it works it absolutely works there's a very reason why we're 24th out of 32 teams draft that we get to pick a player this time because we were the 24th best in the NFL according to the rules. What rules?

So we get to pick the funniest pick before. What rules are you talking about? How good you are? Do you remember what the question was? How did he get to this? This was in the middle of it. I think it was mostly just like a... He starts riffing?

He's definitely riffing, but it's like a... When you're picking this late in the middle of it. I think it was mostly just like a... He starts riffing? He's definitely riffing, but it's like a when you're picking this late in the draft, you don't know what's going to be there, right? Like teams that are picking third, they're getting asked about quarterbacks, wide receivers, etc. But when you're picking at 24, you get asked like, oh, there's a little bit of

uncertainty at the board. And he's like, well, actually, that's because we were the 24th best team. According to the rules. Yeah. And so we get to pick um everybody gets to pick before us up to 24. okay hold on so that's right what that does is effectively create the competition in the game that we have right now it's called the game of you're just talking about football. Okay, and then this is the last one I have, and I don't know. I don't know Jane Slater personally. She seems like a very decent person to me

outside of the whole intern rant that she had a couple years ago. I might have taken some issue with that, but I find this to be like a weird way for her to approach Jerry. Jane. Jane Slater, NFL Network. Trust me, I get budgeting.

I've been working on it over the years. But my job is to explain to fans, friends, and family who don't understand when you've got... Okay. Already. Right? We're softening it up and that's, yeah. Strange?

Yeah. Well, you mean like... My job is to explain. Her job is not to explain things to her friends and family, actually. Or anybody's just do your job. Yeah, it's just to report on the NFL Network. And now she's doing a little 101 with him. Yeah. To try to explain why, Jerry, this is going to sound like a tough question, but I'm not...

Yes. I mean, I'm on board with you. I get budgets and stuff. I get it. Yeah. You and I, we're friends. We know it. But all these howling idiots who just spend money on your tickets.

These morons. I mean, can you explain it? I mean, let's dumb it down for these people. Why is it? Yes, that's what she's leading to, right? Jane Slater, NFL Network. Trust me, I get budgeting. I've been working on it over the years.

But my job is to explain to fans, friends, and family who don't understand when you've got these three free agents. Yeah, just ask the question, right? Again, yeah. I mean, my job is to... Like, you would never hear Kyle Shaw do that. My job is to come here and bullshit with you guys while these people drink beer.

Champagne. But in the event, it doesn't make any sense. These three free agents, particularly Dak, we've seen in the past. I don't think us covering this team were surprised that a deal hasn't gotten done, and typically they don't get done until training camp. Again. That's also not true. Is that a shot?

It's not only not true, it's unnecessary because she's like, we get it. Again. We're insiders. The intelligentsia here. We're on board with you. We get it. We get it. But there's no real maybe the Cowboys often don't sign these till training

camp, but there's no rule. There's no trend in the NFL. In fact, you might want to do it before the draft and free agency so that you can have your, you know, like you've talked about. Yeah, you've talked about DAC restructuring is, you know, it's going to be a big, easy way to add talent now and maybe, you know, go all in.

We've seen in the past, I don't think us covering this team were surprised that a deal hasn't gotten done. And typically they don't get done until training camp. But why not work on those deals earlier so that you have the flexibility to go get those better? See, that's where you start the question, right? That's all you have to say. Jane Slater, how come you don't start these deals early?

You didn't need 30 seconds of softening it. Earlier so that you have the flexibility to go get those better. He'll still give her the sushi. Your problem is that you... Well, I'm answering your question, but you don't have many problems. I really... All right, well, let's just be clear here. Jerry just hit on Jane Slater.

Well, she kind of did take offense there in the background. Because he begins with... My problem. Yes. Yeah. It's not my problem. I just said it was the fan,

these idiot fans. It's not me. Dumbasses in section 300. Your problem is that you... Well, I'm answering your question, but you don't have many problems. I really... You're question, but you don't have many problems. I really, you're excellent. Okay.

That's hitting on her right there. What an absolute creep. You throw up the hard hands too? You're excellent but uh the point is that you may be working on it and not moving anything but your eyebrows who in the world would think that we're not working on it i work on it it pops open at 2 in the morning sometimes. Yeah. Where? What does he say?

I work on ads. At 2 in the morning. No, but did he indicate a place? No, no, no. I think he's just saying. I work on it. It pops open at 2 in the morning sometimes. It pops open.

Like you just said, he thinks about it all the time. And this is obviously because Dak the other day said, we haven't really talked at all. We haven't talked at all yet. Yeah. So they're asking him about it, and he's like, we haven't really talked at all. We haven't talked at all yet. Yeah. So they're asking him about it, and he's like, we're working on it all the time. Also, you're hot. Yeah.

There's nothing wrong with you. I mean, nothing. So anyways, it's a... Especially since he got those new uptops a few years ago. Okay. Isn't that what people were saying? I think they called them bolt-ons. I feel like people were saying that,

and I can legitimately fall back on that, unlike Jane Slater. Like, people... I mean, I'm not saying it, Jane. Not fall back. Anyways. Okay. Yeah, you guys are...

You kind of threw me off with your... You focused less on the content of the Cowboys audio and more on the... People were saying. The people reporting on the Cowboys. Some people were saying. But, you know, it'll be exactly like it has always been, where tonight they'll do some BS press conference.

It'll take 30 minutes. Then they'll do another one tomorrow night. Then they'll do some BS press conference. It'll take 30 minutes. Then they'll do another one tomorrow night. Then they'll do another one Saturday. And we'll get – at least we'll have on Monday, like, Jerry being like, hey, Jackson. Mm-hmm. Yeah, the call. We'll get the calls.

Yeah, that's good. That's about it. I think they're going to trade down. Yeah, are they picking tonight? I would bet – if I had to bet, I would bet no. Yeah, just because they kind of lack picks later, right? Yeah, so it's cool to trade for Stephon Gilmore and Brandon Cooks. I was on board with both, but got to pay the bill at some point.

Yeah. Now you have no picks for like 96 selections or something between their third pick and their fifth round pick. But they have a lot

of comp picks next year, right? That they could flip to this year? I think that's what I read. They should, yeah. I mean, what?

Dalton? Dalton. Dalton. That should be a decent pick. Who else? Who am I forgetting? Cowboy fans. They don't care.

They don't care. Nope. They don't care about any of this. All right. How about let's get some viewer mail before we get a little break in. Okay. Shall we? Bum, bum, bum.

Hey, everybody. It's time to answer some of today's viewer mail. This is some stuff, some things. Biotish, Dorrance Armstrong. Biotish was the one I was thinking of. Tyron Smith, Tony Pollard. That's not nothing. So two-fifths and two-sixths next year.

So they are all in. That's right, yeah. They have two-fifths and two-sixths. I have a bunch of birthdays I don't know if you guys have other things I have one thing Yeah, I think I have one thing You want me to do birthdays first? Go for it

Shout out on Thursday For my good buddy in DF His name is Austin Owen This would make his day Just that? That's all we had to do? Low bar. That's from BL,

Brett Lieber. Uncle Fuhrer, emailing live to tape to wish happy 44th to my sweet, clean wife, April. Feels like a hot name. Yeah. I have no intention of waking her up

that special way as she better be making me breakfast and getting the kids ready for school. Born in April, named April. Her leaders are that whore from the new Dumb Zone commercial and Marjorie Taylor Greene. It's actually the same person. She wants more Carter, less Jake, and the same amount of Sarah Heppola

from D1DF. South Lake Aggie, Matt. You've met Matt. He's a good dude. He actually was taking part in our little Carve an Apple Challenge the other day. Oh, cool. After, I believe, our video. My husband and loyal DF, Zach Kuliz.

ZKMavs. Oh, dude. Happy Sam Perkins birthday. He's a devoted MSN email user. His dream is for Jake to call him a good dude. I love your intro song from Lauren Kuliz. That's a

great dude. I've always thought Lauren is a hot name too. He's been featured on Jimmy Kimmel. How come? I don't know. I shouldn't have said that without having the full backstory, but I do remember Kimmel would call people and do bits. I don't know. I could show you the picture if you want

but it's not that great I'm sure Lauren will follow up yeah is it a better story than that there's like 20 people that live fairly close to me but I didn't say

this is a great story I just said this is a story it is a kind of was a story Business Wednesday was my son Sam's 26th birthday

his leaders are Swearing Blake Dan's's all-black outfit, and the Dumb Zone's future Amazon wish list. Would like to hear Blake tell Gene to F off from Rob Schindler. Okay, there he is. I think it was like Mavs related. He is a Kimmel there. Wish myself a happy birthday.

Mid-60s, Day 10, DF. Number is too high to figure out a sports tie-in. My biggest accomplishment of 2023, I gave Dagenhart a lead on his new job. Okay. That's so inside. I've listened to

the Lawyer Roundtable four times in its entirety. My hero is low-energy Blake and conspiracy theory Blake. More drop Beth from Zane and Aubrey. Hotmail user... My Forrest Gump Alabama birthday.

Jeez, anybody? Forrest Gump's Alabama number. This is your email? My wife didn't wake me up in a special way because we're married. I'll check to see if she smells like a cheater later. Jeez. You got to do that, dude. You think you have the nose for that?

Got to do it. Yeah? Now, here's the thing. Four scum, four scum. It's 44. 44. Does that turn you away? Or are you like,

you know what, actually, it's like when a dog goes to the bathroom in the yard. Now we're warmed up. Yeah, and then like another dog

will come by and be like, nah, it's mine again. Yeah. I'm sorry. Leaders, are your sick,

these people need that. You shouldn't apologize for that. Your sick references are my leaders. Jake's knife rip hustle and Blake's skiing speedometer. That is Warren D. Loach, who is sitting behind Jake right now.

Yeah. Father Hotmail, our brother Sammy, happy Jason Terry minus one birthday. Just say you're 30. Leaders are Hideo Nomo and Brian Hoya. Hoya. He'd suggest less talking from sit-in spares. Oh, no.

And more drops. Sorry, Claire. P.S. We've been writing you for birthdays for the last 10 effing years, and our last name is pronounced Waits not Whites. Love you long time from Michael and Charlie Whites. It's spelled W-E-I-T-Z. Yeah, I mean...

These guys are wrong. Their name is pronounced Whites. I don't know. It seems like an Ellis Island issue or something. I don't know how you sort that out. It's my wife Amy's birthday. She's a week one DF.

She's a Chiefs fan. So it's her Willie Gay. You know, I'm just not doing it. We share a Patreon account, so I hope there's no technology like geofencing that you haven't heard of that will crack down on our account sharing. Her leaders are Heart Attack Man and Dutch.

That's from Jason. Dutch. How about the shared Patreon account? You against that? I've just never heard of it before. Because you don't share anything with your wife. You guys like it.

The home. Yeah, but you pay half of the mortgage. And she pays half of the mortgage. Correct. I feel like if the power dynamic was different when you first started... Probably. That would not be a thing. Yeah, I mean... Because we used to kind of go half on everything until I started making a lot more money than my wife.

And then it was like, oh, no, no. Now you just pay for everything. Yeah, so... Because it's our money. Yeah, I think... Like, if I make more, it's our money. If she makes more, I've worked hard for this, and you've been smoking pot for the last 10 years.

Like, that was her attitude when we first... Smoking cat piss. Yeah. Whatever's in your car. Yeah, no That was her attitude when we first... Smoking cat piss. Yeah. Whatever's in your car. Yeah, no. I mean, when we met, I was making like 26.5. And she had like a real job.

Yeah. She's six figs. It just didn't... Maybe not quite that much, but it just didn't make any sense for me to be like, all right, well, you need to pay...

That's exactly the same as my wife, though. Yeah. And then, you know... I guess you're still striving to make more than her, right? That's the point? It's never happened. But if it does, I guarantee you

there'll be no more of this Venmo-ing each other for this and that. I'd be excited to let you know. Day 2 DF here. Number 1438. Let's see. My son David is 13 today. Ooh.

Damn it. What'd you do? It's tomorrow. Ugh. Good grief. Do you want me to dump it? No. Just if there's a David out there that's –

we have like about 800 listeners named David whose birthday is tomorrow, and they're 13. Could be any one of them. Yeah. We'll save this for tomorrow. Oh, Moment of Silence requested, Hey, Dan and Jake, I want to let you know the sad, tragic passing of Andrew Malone. I know he worked as an audio engineer

for you on many remotes at the ticket back in the day. He followed you guys as a DF subscriber. He had an acute medical issue that struck fast on a flight home from a trip with his wife this past Sunday. And just like that, a great dude was taken from us. RIP, Andrew. This is from

Kirk. Number 3748. And so, yeah, moment ofP. Andrew. This is from Kirk, number 3748. And so, yeah, moment of silence for Andrew. That was just barely a moment, yeah. We just don't have the time. He was a great dude. That really... Did you know him, Engineer Buddy?

Very, very well. Oh, okay. Yeah. I'd worked with him a ton. Yeah, good dude. Oh, okay. Yeah. I've worked with him a ton. Yeah, good dude. That messed me up yesterday. I think you probably remember this too, Dan, from the

Stars postgame days. The every night postgame show setup is a very lonely existence. It's just you and the engineer and the team sucks. And you're just like, oh, neither one of us really want to be here. Well, I just had me and you and the engineer and the team sucks. And you're just like, neither one of us really want to be here. Well, I just had me and Bob and the engineer.

And usually a couple ticket chicks. That's right. Just whatever you were dragging out of there. Ice girls. Andrew, great dude. And I have Uncle Hotmail. Can I get a shout out to my wife, Caitlin? Jake's not going to like this.

It's our Barry Sanders anniversary. God dang it. I know you think it's SG to ask for an anniversary shout out, but if that puts me in the same category as space, then I'm honored. From Matt Vanderpool. We're doing anniversaries now? You're right. Come on.

I don't care if it's 20. You're right. Are you guys going to make fun of me if I do some big trip for my 10th anniversary? That means he's already got it planned. I don't have a plan, but it's been broached. Anybody in here done that at all? Big trip? All these guys.

Look, and they're all hot. Yeah, but you're the one who hates round number celebrations. I know. I know. You should tell her, honey, I treat every day like it's our 10th anniversary. I like that. What's going to be the difference between that

and any other anniversary or birthday or first kiss day? Where I take off work? Yeah, and go to Puerto Vallarta. Has anybody here renewed their vows? Yeah, we'd leave if you did. But we all know people who have done it.

Which means you cheated. Alright, let's talk to Brunig in a minute. Okay. Which means you cheated. All right. Let's talk to Brunig in a minute. Okay. Joining me on stage now are some very special guests, content creators who you know from YouTube. Dude Perfect. And Jason and Travis's mom, Donna Kelsey.

Go ahead, Donna. Go ahead. Playing in a game on TV at the same time. Right. Okay, Travis is there, Jason's there. How in the world do you decide which game that you're going to watch? Man, I don't know. That's really tough. I don't know. That's really tough.

I don't know. It's just tough to choose. We had a feeling that would be the case, so we cooked up something a little bit special for you to help you break the tie. Here's the deal. We've got a custom coin with Travis and the Chiefs on one side and Jason and the Eagles on the other. If your boys are playing at the same time, all you have to do is flip it

and it takes the decision out of your hands. Should we try it? Let's try it. It's Travis and the Chiefs! You're listening to The Dumb Zone. Yeah, that was like pick 30. That wasn't day three. No.

Isn't that weird? A lot of talk here at the 40th birthday party about the group chat. Yeah. Yeah. They have one called the safe space. That's right. Because you said that is what the group chat basically is. That's right.

In today's day and age. Sometimes you just have a group chat where there's just one guy who's constantly updating you about labor law. Oh. That's weird that you would say that because joining us now, the great Matt Brunig.

There he is. He's our labor lawyer. Hey, guys. You need any legal services? We often do. Turns out. And you are the man. They mistreat you.

I know we've, I've sent a guy or two to you who has reached out saying, hey, I got a thing. I don't know if any of that is turned into riches or fruit. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I've gotten a couple of clients through that process.

Don't you have a famous case going on right now that you say maybe we are somewhat the reason that you are involved in it? Yeah. Steven Crowder of Louder with Crowder, one of the top right-wing streamers, he has a case. I have a case where I'm representing his former producer who was fired six years ago

and was sued for breach of a non-disparagement provision, much like Jake Kemp was. Are you representing Not Gay Jared? Not Gay Jared, that's my client. He doesn't go by that anymore. He was known as Not Gay Jared? Yeah, because he looked a little funny. Okay.

But he was not gay. Apparently not. He went to make that claim. And he was Jared. Hey, Matt, are there any sort of rules or laws against tracking an employee's location? You know, there was just a case on this. But the D.C. Circuit reversed the board on it. So, you know, we're still working on that.

But the board tried to say that, yeah, electronic surveillance like that, unfair labor practice, but circuit courts cut them down. Well, there you go, Blake. Damn. I was tracking Blake yesterday because I couldn't get a hold of him. We had an off day, Matt. Well, it was an off day for you, apparently. Right. We were very, very

busy. Matt Brunig, known well throughout the land as husband of Liz. That's right. But certainly our labor lawyer who, even when we're not really working with him anymore, I do see in January on your website, today I personally filed an unfair labor practice against Cumulus Media. It alleges the company maintains an employee handbook with 17 rules. And Matt likes to do this stuff, I think, to amuse himself sometimes

and to help the little man. That's what he is really all about. Hey, they've already made changes to the Cumulus handbook. Many, dozens of changes to it. Still illegal, though. Still got some illegal rules in there. So, you Many, dozens of changes to it. Still illegal, though. Still got some illegal rules in there. So, you know, they need to keep going. I don't know why they don't just hire me to fix it,

but whoever they hired did an okay job, but not comprehensive. That's a part of the lawyer roundtable that I'm not sure if we focused enough on, which was at some point during the middle of mediation, Matt was like, here's a list of people that they could hire that would understand this the way that I do. We're literally handing you the playbook of these are the people that you need to talk to. I don't believe that they ever really did. I know that they at one point enlisted one particular attorney,

but it was just very funny that Matt was like, I'm so far ahead of you that I will literally tell you what you can do to catch up. Yeah, sometimes I like to do trick plays and sometimes I like to just run it right up the middle. Like they know it's coming but they still can't stop it. They still can't stop it.

Talking to you the other day, Matt's always got, as you know, inventive ideas maybe to better sports or to improve sports that we're watching. But also, he's always thinking the labor mind. And so what were you saying about you had some idea based on –

because we were talking Angel Hernandez, so we'll get to that. Angel Hernandez, the umpire. We'll get to that. Angel Hernandez, the umpire. But you were saying the NBA will fine players for criticizing refs in post-game press conferences. Right. And you don't think that's correct? Right.

I think especially if two or more players were to criticize a ref. They're collectivizing. That would be a complaint about working conditions. And if you were to get disciplined for that, that would be an unfair labor practice. I've never seen someone bring that charge, but I'm on the look. I'm on the hunt for it.

So if you see someone get penalized or fined for that, I may just file a charge just to see what comes of it. I know it's in the collective bargaining agreement, but you're not allowed to waive that right in a collective bargaining agreement. So it can't be just LeBron complains? It gets tricky. It's always better to do two or more like you guys,

but sometimes a sole speaker can be considered protected activity if it's a logical outgrowth of other protected activity so essentially if lebron was complaining with his teammates beforehand and then he singularly complained that singular complaint would be an outgrowth of that concerted conversation but it would be yeah but ideal if we get two players saying it kind of together, you know. Okay, well, we'll work on that for you. We know some players. Yeah, you know, we could set this up.

Get Luka. Luka loves to complain about the refs. He does. Yeah. It seems like it should be easy. So, yeah, we started talking about that because of Angel Hernandez, and you're familiar with Angel Hernandez, the umpire who is commonly known as the worst umpire in the game.

And he, what, don't they even show charts? Like they contract these things now. Oh, yeah, for sure. This is the guy who is like by far, he's way outside the norm. I got an email a while back who said, hey, an interesting conversation might be talking with Brunig about the power of the umpire's union making firing Angel Hernandez

impossible. Also, I read a tweet from Bill James around the same time. He said, I understand the legal process necessary. Bill James, the baseball savant. Are you familiar with Bill James, Matt Brunig? Feels like you would love him. Popular crime? He wrote popular book, right? Popular Crime?

He wrote Popular Crime, but he really kind of revolutionized... Sabermetrics. Yeah. Oh, yeah. No, I didn't know his name, but I know, you know, Moneyball and all that.

Is that him? Yeah, it feels like... Yeah. He's been around about way. Yeah. It just feels like you'd be a big fan of looking at things from a different angle and kind of totally changing the whole game.

He says, I understand the legal process necessary to terminate Angel Hernandez would be painful, but at this point I think it needs to be said, MLB is disrespecting the fans by not doing it. It's an ongoing embarrassment. So your thoughts on Angel Hernandez. Is it impossible to get rid of him because of the umpires union? I haven't seen the collective bargaining agreement. I did try to find it.

It's not online. But I don't think that's true. You can always be fired for incompetence. Typically, a contract like that will make it so you can't be fired immediately. You know, you have to be given a chance to improve your performance. So they give you a PIP, a performance improvement plan, verbal warning, written warning, and then termination. It's called progressive discipline. But incompetence is always a basis for termination. I've never seen anyone ever

waive anything like that. I can't imagine how anyone would ever agree to what just a job for life. What if he doesn't show up? What if he, you know, like what if you just refuse, what if he just calls everything a ball? Um, you know, so I'm pretty sure that he probably can, um, be fired one way or another. Do you have an opinion on like automated balls and strikes robot umps? They say, uh,? I'm for it if it's doable. It seems like everyone always says that it's not perfect or whatever, but I don't know.

I watch it on TV. It looks pretty good. Did you guys hear Max Scherzer? Pretend you did. Okay. Because I'm going to play you. I have not heard it. Max Scherzer.

Rehab start or something? Is that what he's doing in Frisco? No, Round Rock. Round Rock, okay. I would have seen him in Frisco. You would have gone? Oh, yeah. I was planning on it.

Okay. Well, he spoke on the possibility of automated. He was asked, what do you think of automated balls and strikes? I don't know. I'm not really a fan. I want a human back there judging calls. It seems too weird to have a robot calling the game.

That's one of the problems. It's the term robot. It's the term robot. It's just a camera. It's not going to be like a metal character back there. Yeah, yeah. The Jetsons or whatever. It feeds on old people's then. Yeah, yeah. The Jetsons or whatever. It feeds on old people's medicines.

Yeah, no. Calling it automated balls and strikes is really the marketing that we have to do. Yeah. Just kind of like remember when Pro-Choice used to be called Pro-Death, and then they were like, wait, that's really bad. That doesn't work. They were Pro-Baby-Death, and they were like, we're not getting any traction here. Let's change this.

Back to the drawing board. I think I threw an OO slider, and that just felt like a ball, and then all of a sudden that's getting called a strike now. For me, the way I kind of thought about this and how we want the electronic strike zone. I think when you talk enough guys that we want the human element of the game. The human element of the game is good. And we need to keep that in baseball.

I figure we've done so much in baseball to try to remove the human element. And so for me, going forward of how I kind of conceptualize what the you know, the electronic strike zone should be is really, we need to rank the umpires, let the electronic strike zone rank the umpires. And then we need to have a conversation about the bottom, let's call it 10%, or whatever you want to declare the bottom is and talk about relegating those umpires to the minor leagues and getting in the best umpires in the game. You know, that would that way the umpires in the game. That way the umpires are going against themselves. It's still a human element of how we rank the umpires, that it's amongst themselves and that policing kind of the bottom is the way to go.

When I'm out there pitching, if you told me I had the 10th best umpire or the 75th best umpire. Okay, well, he goes on a little bit, but I thought that was a great idea. I think it's an interesting idea, but I also think it's a terrible idea. Why? I mean, that's how players are. Yeah.

If you're one of the worst players, you will end up losing your job. You will go to the minors, something, and we'll bring up another guy, and he's going to be better. Well, I'll let Matt go first. Well, I want to know why you think it sucks. Conceptually, it's weird to so he's of he agrees that the balls and strikes are called correctly by the camera yeah

right that's the premise of it and so instead of saying okay let's have a hundred percent accuracy with balls and strikes he says i would like there to be some inaccuracy, but also the most inaccurate shouldn't be there. So like, what are we trying to, what is the goal here? Do we want 97% correct, 98% correct? To my mind, instead of doing bottom 10%, that if getting into his mind, he should establish like a percent threshold. And if you get over the percent threshold, you at least get to keep your job, whether that's 98%, 99%, whatever. I don't know why not just go 100% if he's accepting that you could do that with a camera. But yeah, I'd say a threshold versus just automatic, whoever's the bottom 10 umps or

whatever. That's exactly what it is. And then also on top of that, the fact that, so are you going to get better when you get relegated? Like soccer teams get relegated and they can spend more money. They can acquire more talent. They can get themselves promoted and get back, you know, up to whatever level. Are you? A baseball player could theoretically get better.

Okay. How many umpires do you feel like if they got sent down to do Round Rock or Frisco in the next five years of their life from 40 to 46 or something are like, oh, you know what? Actually, now I call balls and strikes better. You might just not have it. Then you shouldn't be in the bigs, right? Well, no, but... If there are guys who are in the minors who are calling them at a 98% clip, you're calling them at an 84% clip. Shouldn't that minor league umpire be up in the majors?

But he can't be because you're already in the majors, and it kind of feels like a Supreme Court thing. Yeah, no. Like you're just locked in. Yeah. How about we stop rotating? You're just a home plate umpire. So if we have the best home plate ump, they do that every –

I think they just say that's a lot of more efforts and... Pay them more. Okay. Yeah. But if you've got a guy that is playing different positions every day and you want to send them down to the minors, you have them in a consistent spot. I mean, in the long run, Matt's right.

If you're accepting... You're judging them with the camera. If you're accepting that, yes, using the camera can help judge these guys, why not just have... Also, I think the best idea I've ever heard is kind of like... The best idea which... The best idea is to 100% use automated.

Yeah. To me. Yeah. The best idea, if they want to keep the umps involved, is like the challenge system, that there's a very quick challenge. They actually can find out within two seconds. Send it to your ear.

Yeah, and that's been done in minor league baseball, and they're proving that that actually does not take more time in the games and all that kind of stuff that everybody's really concerned about. I don't know if you've heard that, Matt, but clearly. Yeah, I mean, whatever. That also just seems pointless. What what do you have a limited number of challenges is that the idea doesn't want one are they allowed to have a TV in

the dugout to see when their balls and strikes and then they just challenge I think I would think it's just the batter like there's no challenge from the sideline there's no challenge from anywhere else and it has to be bang bang right then. Hey,

I think that was a sign. Um, say that again. Like he can't, he can't receive a sign from the dugout from the scoreboard of the Astro here. Uh, here at trash. Look over in the dugout.

Yeah. I think it's times to the batters or the third base. I mean, but who's closer and more able to tell than the batter? Yeah, yeah, but I mean, I guess my point is, why wouldn't you just always challenge if it was wrong? You would never get that wrong, right? Because it's right there on the TV.

Anyone who's watching the TV can see it. Well, you would certainly have to have a limited number. I mean, that's what they do with plays at first base or close plays in the field. You actually have the technology, but you just don't want to be using it all the time. Now, I would like to see the third base and first base coach eliminated.

Say again? Third base and first base coach eliminated. Go on. What are they doing? They're doing this. They're waving. Hurry, hurry. You need people telling you when to run?

I mean, that seems like part of being an athlete, no? You could probably get rid of the first base coach. He's just there to get your batting gloves. Batting gloves. Yeah. Wrist protector. Sure. Yeah.

I think you need third base. What do you think about the bench coach? I just need like a friend. Yeah, I don't even know. A bench coach is a friend of the manager. I don't know what that guy does. Like they never just hire a bench coach that the manager never met. Right.

Yeah. It's not like a Cowboys head coach coordinator existing situation. Yeah, it's like a friend that you can kind of bounce things off. You feel like we should steal here? I don't know. What if I paid you 600 grand? Yeah. That's like a friend that you can kind of bounce things off. You feel like we should steal here? I don't know. What if I paid you 600 grand? Yeah, that's what it is. It's keeping guys that you've heard of in baseball.

And it helps the economy, right? So that's good. Does it help the economy, Matt? So what happened with these non-competes? Oh, wait. Let's get to that after we do. I was going to say, what are we doing? I think I told you before we wanted to talk to Matt periodically because I do love the

Bruinigs podcast. You can subscribe to that on Patreon.com. Is that right, Matt? Yes, right. Patreon.com slash the Bruinigs. There you go. I'm a big fan. And every week, Matt will do an audio grab bag.

Very creative. He's even got a little open. You didn't send me the open. I thought maybe I'd be able to play the open. Oh, yeah, sorry. User-generated opens. Not as high quality as your users, but still. So he's basically saying, can someone send me a better open?

That's what he's asking right there. I'm going to use AI to punch it up. But I like it every week, and a lot of times it's just stuff we haven't heard or we wouldn't play or whatever, and I'm like, how can I get this on with Jake? Hey, what if we got Matt on now and again, and we could just do kind of a best of, the audio grab bag? And I got to learn some of Matt's process because I said,

can you just send me the cuts? He's like, well, I just have links. Like they don't cut off the audio. They just play the link right from TikTok. That's right. And a tab. So Matt, of course, being the part of it. He would have failed the bad radio internship program.

I can tell you that. Right. Let's put on some heads and tails. Let's put some fades. A little fade. A little hijack. Let can tell you that. Right. Let's put on some heads and tails. Let's put some fades. A little fade. A little hijack. Let's make this thing sound good. But we're going to have to pump this first one up.

So I'm going to go in order that you want to set them up at all, but I'll play these in the order that you sent me. I know the first one is the wrestler at Penn State. He won his tournament or whatever it is, and he's being interviewed by Sideline Reporter. Okay. As a true freshman, could you have pictured this moment any better? No.

I guess not. I mean, it's not what I was expecting, I guess. Pretty cool. Being a true freshman, what does it mean to you to take down a guy who's had experience in the tournament before? They can have as many years extra as they want. It don't matter. That's all it means. There are still six Penn State athletes that need to compete in the finals. How important was it for you to ignite this fuse? compete in the finals.

How important was it for you to ignite this fuse? Great. Yeah, I mean, pretty important, I guess. I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. It doesn't really matter. Still a little shocked by the moment, Brayden. Congratulations.

Headed to Nationals. Congratulations, Brayden Shane. Still shocked here by the moment, but a lot of Penn State guys to see. Okay, here's the thing. I don't think he is shocked by the moment. I think he just doesn't give a shit. Yeah, he's like, no, I State guys to see. Okay, here's the thing. I don't think he is shocked by the moment. I think he just doesn't give a shit. Yeah, he's like, no, I expected to win. I just explained to you

that I am not shocked at all. No, I'm better than all of them. I came in here expecting to win. You're asking really stupid questions and she wanted to be like, oh my God. How'd you ignite this fuse?

He's like, what does that even mean? I train and stuff. It's an individual sport. I mean, I don't really know. I mean? I train and stuff. It's an individual sport. I mean, I don't really know what I do as on anyone else. I train. Yeah, I just kind of beat this guy up. I love the first question because it is,

can you envision this going any better or have this go any better? And he's just like, I won. What could have gone better? I suppose there was a chance that if I won the tournament, they made me president. Yeah. But outside of that, no, this is... I mean, you're interviewing me.

If you fired your top off, I guess there's a cherry on the cake, but I'm not asking for that. You asked the question, and I am now answering the question. Just rattling around the Envision Bank. As a true freshman, could you picture this moment any better? No. No? No.

No. This is like the top. Yeah. You can't do better than first. It's just very literal. Did you see who won? It was me. I mean, I guess I could win more.

That's really good. More better. He doesn't have any media training. I thought it was a great expose of the vacuousness of sideline reporting in general, right? Sort of these questions. Normally, you get some whatever. Dak will give some answer that sort of is decent but he instead is actually listening to the question yeah like this is what

yeah this question that's so funny though because uh dan and i have talked about this before like my my brother when i realized you know it's super super low level uh tulane uh d1 though when i watched him get interviewed after like doing press conferences it was like It's super, super low level Tulane D1 though. When I watched him get interviewed after doing press conferences, it was very strange to me because I'm used to watching pro athletes do it and he would just be like, yes, no. I'm like, that's not how you do it. You're supposed to give some sort of answer that they can use in a quote, but he, as you said, was just actually listening to the question that he was asked, and he'd be like, I don't

think so. Right. Dak would be like, yeah. That would just be the end of the question. It's great. I trained hard for this time. Exactly. It was wonderful to have my family here.

Yeah. Just throw a lot of other stuff out there. It would be some long flowery thing, and Joe would just be like, I don't know. Then there would be a silence. Any setup for audio grab bag item number two? Number two. I don't remember what this one is. It might be the guy saying you need $300,000 a year to live.

I think that is the one. Let's see here. Okay. All from TikTok. I heard it's big. I say 300, but again, I'm a little jaded. But to me, if you're not making 300 grand a year, you're not living. You're surviving.

My goal when I first started was 1,000 a day, 365,000 a year, every day. That's when you start living a little bit. And quite frankly, nowadays, that's not even much anymore. So anybody in the world that's not making 300 grand should be looking for alternatives. Leverage lifestyle, baby. So now you're teaching people basically how to live off a laptop. Five pillars. So it's personal brand, credit, Bitcoin, passive income, and travel.

For the past two years, I've figured out how to master each and every one of those things. Just like Mohammed said. The pillars. How do you get rich on travel? Well, you enrich yourself. Right, yeah. Your spirit. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah. So if you're not at 300K, you have to reevaluate your life. Yeah. In the whole world. There's like 2% of people in the country make 300K. Yeah, why don't we make it, again, the world. There's like 2% of people in the country make 300K. Yeah, why don't we make it, again, the world? And it would be 0.2%. Yeah.

So you're into, as I hear these grab bags, you follow these... Oh, he's a Cobra Tate guy. Absolutely. What is that? These high T, 30, like they're all teaching you how to be a man, right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I'm always trying to figure that out. And they, yeah, it's, it's a lot of,

yeah, it's, it's a combination of how to make money doing kind of online scams and then how to, how to get women and just how to comport yourself you know in in life uh and uh yeah yeah so so basically here's what happened is um so uh early in life if you're an autistic male um some of you start lifting just tons of weights and then some of you start suing the government and those are you could pick one of those those are basically the two paths uh that apparently you can take

and uh matt went one way matt went one way and the cobra tates of the world went the other way yeah that's right or you can get into high ticket sales That's right. Yeah, it's a part of the internet that I really only know exists because of him. And if you ask... But they have like Alpha Camp now, right? They have so many products you can buy. You can get into... You can buy into their group chat.

You can pay like $1,000 a month to get into their group chat. Maybe that's something you guys could do. I was about to say. 690 remote? Yeah. You can take classes. They have retreats.

It's a whole thing. I was just going to say, if you ask Dan or Jake about what made you successful, I kind of got lucky here. This kind of just happened to work out. This door opened at the right time. This guy, five pillars. Five pillars.

Okay, and here they are. Boom, boom, boom, Bitcoin. Passive income. He mastered Bitcoin. Yeah. The next one, it says it's from Net Positive Podcast. Yeah, this one is, i queued this one up because i know i know jake hates our lord and uh it's a preacher uh likening the lord to uh fried chicken

or a faith in the lord to fried chicken okay let's get to the fried chicken preacher deal dude understand how i can take a dirty bird and i can rip its feathers off and i can batter it in beautiful sauce on both sides throw it down in peanut oil that's boiling at 325 degrees put it under six minutes of high temp pressure and bring out a beautiful chick-fil-a sandwich but just because I do not understand it doesn't mean I'm not going to partake in it. Honey, tonight I don't understand how God became man, and I don't understand how man can go meet God, but Jesus said, I am the way, I am the truth, I am the life, and no

man will come to the Father but by me. I'm fired up. I'm fired up. I'm going to Chick-fil-a after this and church same thing really this guy was dead serious 100 sincere theology wise this i'm in i'm back in i'm back in yeah the the idea that it's unknowable how fried chicken works it's pretty pretty straightforward actually i feel like someone's figured this out i mean how fried chicken works. Pretty straightforward, actually. I feel like someone's figured this out.

I mean, I don't know, like on the molecular level, but someone does, you know. Yeah, no, if there were a spectrum of creating the universe and salvation and fried chicken, I think they'd be super far apart. You feel like someone alleged these,

some preachers are like in it for the money and stuff. Not me. I'm just saying people are saying, Jane, Jane Slater might say some of the fans I talked to are saying, right. A lot of these guys, was there any product placement there?

Did he get paid by Chick-fil-A to mention Chick-fil-A? Probably not. I don't know. That would be hard. How would you arrange that? I think there's some handshake deal between every church

and Chick-fil-A. That's not a bad idea. That's not a bad point. You can't go there today, but we'll mention it. I don't think it's like product placement. I think it's more just that,

and see, you've been out of the church game for a long time. They just like talking about stuff that is relevant. Whatever you're thinking about. It's in the news today for a long time. They just like talking about stuff that is... Relevant. Whatever you're thinking about. It's in the news today.

Exactly, yeah. That's why I was telling these guys a couple weeks ago, I wanted to go to church the week before the eclipse because I wanted to go to 10 churches the week before the eclipse because I promise you they were hammering some sort of like, don't let that evil black out your heart of the moon.

I promise you that was happening. The biggest pop culture reference that I think has happened in the past few years that made church sermons was Kanye's gospel album. Everyone loved talking about that at the time. That was a big deal. That was a big deal. Michael Jordan somehow would come up all the time when I was a kid. I'm like, why?

Cowboys on Sunday. Oh, we'll get you out of here. Cowboy game. Okay. Well, look, dude, they got to keep it relatable to the common man. Sure. Were you ever exposed to church, Matt? No.

I think I may have gone two or three times in my life. Actually, funny story about that when my when my dad was dating this uh you know my parents are divorced so he was dating someone and that's an important qualifier yeah and i had to uh i had to go to there to go to you know she was into church and whatever and they uh they were talking, you know, your body is a temple and you shouldn't be fat. And she really disliked that and stopped going to church. Oh. Yeah. All right, our last audio grab bag,

it looks like it's from, it's called Equity Mates. Yeah, this is about, you know, the kind of work ethic you should have as a alpha man okay we continue that theme slaves worked all the hours they were awake for their entire lives in american history in egyptian history in the rest of the world that had slaves, which is most of the world at some given point. I think, like, if they can do it, so can I. Yeah! Sure.

Yeah, no, that's the point of life. To exist as a slave. You just need the proper motivation. Teenage boys watch this. Like, it's a whole thing. It is definitely. I feel like Dan doesn't know about this. Like, it's a whole thing. It is definitely. I feel like Dan doesn't know about this. I don't.

And that's why I do hear Matt, and he's got funny clips. I'm like, hey, how come? Dude, there's a 50% chance that within 10 years, I'm having to deal with my son watching this stuff. It's true. Yeah. No. Yeah, hopefully. Yeah. or daughter's boyfriend yeah that's an even more terrifying prospect there it's a real thing man and then the you know they arrested andrew

ask your uh ask your daughters about uh andrewate. They probably have takes. Okay. I need to talk to them soon. I enjoy their takes. Andrew Tate. All right. Cobra. And then what's our last thing we wanted to get into?

Oh, yeah. What happened? The non-competes, the FTC. Won't let me be. Has ruled that non-competes are illegal. Let me be me. Thank you, Blake. So let me see. What does this all mean to us?

Can I go to the ticket right now and hire Bob Sturm and he'll work with us tomorrow? The rule takes effect in September. So not until then. In practice, they're going to bring, you know, Chamber of Commerce will bring some kind of lawsuit with some sort of Trump judge there in Texas, and they'll put it on ice for a couple of years while people fight about it in the courts.

But right now, theoretically, in September, yeah, you could, all the non-competes at the ticket would go away. And across the country, except for very high senior executives. So, you know, we'll see. Okay, so this is not like a, we start cheering right now and start burning the cities down and eating the rich. Well, why would that be? Just whatever, the whole, you know, it. Well, why would that be? Just whatever. The whole, you know, it seemed like, I remember last year when we were talking about this,

it was like, oh my gosh, this could be a great thing very soon. And in fact, even in our contract talks, when we were trying to massage our non-compete, kind of change it, because over the years it's never been changed, except for making it like more restrictive. We're like, hey, part of our bargaining power here is, hey, I think you can – these are not uniform across the – In the old days, that's a bad place to stop. But here on the podcast, it's encouraged. Go for it.

That's the name of your wife's group chat. Across the... So the point is, I can't remember what I was saying, but then I said the C word. Oh, it's okay. Yeah. We're not free yet.

But yeah, hopefully it'll come. I mean, it also, it'll be, it's one of those things where, okay, maybe in September, maybe it'll be suspended by the time September comes around. But, you know, it'll help you out in legal disputes. You know, it's like at the NLRB. Remember the when we were having your case, there was not yet a case that had gone through there where they had declared non-competes, you know, to be unfair labor practices. It just they had kind of teed up that that's something they might be willing to do.

And that gives you a little leverage in your other lawsuits. So this would have helped us last year, had this already been published. Yeah, I mean, I don't know if you remember all this, but I was saying the whole time, if we can get to April, the FTC has already said they're going to ban these things.

So, you know, let's just keep kicking the can down the road. You will find if Matt is your lawyer, a lot of things he says that you are skeptical about, they end up coming true. They had announced it in the Federal Register. It doesn't stop everybody that I see you interact with be skeptical of what you're saying. Yeah, but that's the good thing about law.

It's like a sport in that sense. You do eventually get to put up the W. All right. Well, Matt Brunig, everybody goes subscribe to his podcast and get two subscriptions to ours, though. And, yeah, he's the first guy that I've ever heard say that the holder should not be allowed to put his knee on the ground. Right, he should be down, right, immediately,

especially in college football. Of course, yeah. Right. 100%, yeah, for logical kind of consistency with the game there. Also, shouldn't the spike be intentional grounding? Yeah, I mean, the receivers are close enough typically, but you could imagine on like a spread five wide kind of thing. Yeah, you're in the pocket.

Yeah. All right, thanks, Matt. Go do some stuff. Go take down the man. All right. He's the best. Oh, there he is. He logged off pretty quickly. He was about done with you.

Ready to be done. All right, that's the great Mac Burnick. That means we now go to... Here's Jay. I hope. Yeah, I accidentally closed my tab, but I will pull it back up here. One second.

Which one is it? Now who's the dumb guy for printing everything off? Yeah, right? So we had a school shooting at Arlington Bowie this week. It's actually... What's up? Oh, yeah? Arlington Bowie this week.

What's up? Oh, yeah? This going to be another good story? No, we had, two weeks ago it was Wilmer Hutchins. Yesterday it was Arlington Bowie. In this case, we had a 17-year-old killed.

So is this a bad school shooting, though, or was it like one guy type thing again? It was a one guy type thing again. So we're going to have to call it a good school shooting. Yeah, ranking the school shootings. This is more positive. Do we all agree with that logic, right?

I mean, if there's 20 kids killed, that'd be pretty bad. I don't know if they agree with us on this point. I mean, one school... You know, I don't even think it's... I think it's actually

not even the quantity of people killed. I think it is the motive. Like, I think if one kid got mad specifically at like three or four people and killed all of them, or if one kid just snapped because they were depressed and anxious and killed one person. I would actually say that the former.

Is the better school shooting? Yeah. Hmm. Okay, yeah. I always thought it was just a numbers game. Because it was like a root cause of it, you know? Yeah. I dealt with it like a numbers game, but maybe you're right.

I'm going to have to change my ranking system. What did you say? It's like this plane crash theory. It was to be the one guy. Yeah. Yeah. It's like Troy has his ranking of quarterbacks. Maybe Trey does too.

I'm actually way more interested in that. So you're saying it's better if they deserve it? It's not so much deserve, Blake, and I don't want you putting words in my mouth. It's more... What do you want to put in your mouth? It's a fair question. A penis.

Oh. What did you... It's not what I was thinking. I mean, why would your mind go right there to Blake's gorgeous penis? Oh my goodness. I've never heard those two words back to back before. Blake and gorgeous.

Anyways. No, I don't think it's deserved it, Blake. I think it's more can you identify the root cause of the problem as opposed to a kid who just was having a really hard time and snapped. Because that's, I think, what we're all worried about is parents, right? Like, if your kid has a beef, you might be able to talk him out of it. Yeah.

Yeah, it's just sad we're at that point. We're like, yeah, we're glad it's just a fight between kids. And not just a society problem of these people snapping and killing as many people as they can. Yeah.

Well, that's where we are, though. Why don't you get out and go change it? All you have to do is vote. Change school shootings? Yeah. I think all you have to do is vote. Isn't that kind of like growing up, is that a catch-all thing, how to fix the world? Go vote.

And then you go vote, and it didn't make a damn difference because you realize there's hundreds of millions of other people voting too. Yeah, and... It's like playing the ladder or something. You still hear it now, right? Any negative thing you see in the news, people are like, well, I voted for the email lady. I'm like, yeah, that would have made it different.

Write your congressman. Yeah. Okay, well, who's that? I swear to God, if I found out that I had a friend who had written a congressman, I'll never speak to you again. Don't let me find out.

I think you're safe with the guys on this couch. I was going to say, at least here, and I'm pretty sure all around here. Didn't we just talk to somebody that probably has? Well, yeah, but I mean, he's doing like the actual... He's policy, yeah. Yeah, he is. But even as a kid,

you don't think he was upset about something? No. I think he knows that's a waste of time. Let's ask him that next time. That's a great idea. Tomorrow. Million dollar scratch off sold in Balch Springs over the weekend. And the reason I wanted to do this story was

I've told you guys before I love the fact that when I go to the gas station, and I have a new gas station now, Yates. Oh, that's right. Over by my place. Yeah. So I have a new place that I go Yates. Oh, that's right. Over by my place. Yeah. So I have a new place that I go get my little five-hour in the morning.

The old disgusting one that's by you that I go to and get my chew, you know? Yeah. Over by like- I noticed the other day. It's by Andy's. Yeah. Okay, yeah. Yeah.

So they'll give me like a bulk discount or whatever. Is it that they don't have gas anymore? No. They like ripped out their gas pumps like a month ago. Oh, really? Yeah. Okay, well, maybe I went a month ago. Okay.

And when I went, because I'll fill up and then I'll grab a couple of sleeves of the Skoll pouches. I've graduated to pouches. As you get older in life, you gotta go pouch. I just decided, you know, this is all disgusting. I'll go to Zinniapolis, Minnesota with you if you want. Yeah, I've... I'll ride the Zinboni. I've popped a Zin or two, but I don't know, I still feel like... Lincoln Park's Chester

Zinnington? Okay. I didn't know we had this many bits with Zin users. This is probably how he talks at flag football. It absolutely... Oh, man. So absolutely, oh man. So I'm walking up. Zimbabwe? There's a sign.

I'll see you there. There's a sign on the door that says, buy something here. Buy Bitcoin here. Yeah. So I'm going to buy Bitcoin at the sleazy. Where I buy my pouches, yeah. The place with the video poker and the only place I could find Black Tail magazine.

Right. Because there's a whole- They sell Mad Dog? Yeah. Yeah. Like at the register. No, your exchange is probably legit. Yeah.

Oh, okay. Here. Well, here, I wanted to buy one Bitcoin. Here's $60,000. And do you have any of the skull pouches? Can I get $10 cash back? No, but the reason I thought this was funny was because... Okay, Yates.

Well, no, I noticed that not at Yates, but there's another gas station very nearby there. They'll brag about how many winning lottery tickets they've sold. The people that work there take pride in it? There's a sign. It's like X amount of tickets and X amount of

prizes given at this store in the last six months or year or whatever. Does that make you more likely to buy one there or less? What kind of probability moron do you have to be to be like, pretty good? I like that.

I'm going to hop back in there and buy another one. Boy, I'll bet... Where is it, Balch Springs? Yeah, I mean, this particular million dollar ticket was in Balch Springs, but I mean, I see it in Grapevine and Southlake. Yeah, yeah. What's that? Did you already give their team mascot?

No. What do you got? I don't know. That's sad. I know where it is. Yeah, cool. That's all you have? Yeah.

The Bulge Springs Stallions. No. I'm good at it. Yeah, you are. Go ahead. Anyways, Fox 4 has a story today. This is the last one I'll do. A school in Minnesota was demolished.

A 104-year-old school. And buried beneath it, they found a time capsule. Excellent! Did you guys used to do this when you were youngins? Yeah. I did one with my kids that's still buried. Still?

Yeah. And I was thinking we'd get it when my uh daughter turned 20 my younger daughter so maybe we'll i don't know i just keep pushing it back i was gonna do it when they turned 18 and then so it's it's what you would typically imagine it's i don't i don't know if it's i sealed it correctly yeah it's probably it's all rotted but you know know. But he has maggots. Yeah, I don't know. Did you do like a... In this case, it was like newspapers and other...

That sounds really cool. ...items of the day. I'm actually interested in this. Yeah, I mean... Is there anything in there that's shocking or no? There's not like a dildo or anything. Yeah, no. Like shocking or no?

There's not like a dildo or anything. Yeah, no. Like they put a baby in there to see if it would be an adult. Whoa. They froze it? It's all dead. No, it's mostly like documents of the day. Okay. Okay.

A lot of, what do they call the laws that kept black people from buying certain like jim crow type property yeah whatever the red line laws redlining okay yeah that's pretty good i do i did take inspiration from you and uh your family not on uh racism um but on the height thing that's a pretty cool bit oh the yeah I wish I did it better because you know how bad we haven't done it ours is not great either and in fact I think yours looks cool because it looks kind of DIY ish it's so yeah it was like my wife like bought one from Etsy okay yeah you know and it know, and it's like... I just still needed... The word height is written in cursive. Mine needs to be a little less DIY, but not like it was sold to me.

Well, and the other problem too is if they knock your garage down. So, yes. Oh, is that happening to you? Yeah, and so ours is just like a post. Okay, so ours is that the garage door, when you walk in and then go up to the den, you will see the first couple when, you know,

Ava or Eden was five, and then Ava was seven. And then you see like, I didn't do it for a couple more years. And then you see like their writing. Like they did it themselves. And then I picked it back up and you could just see also

and Ava hates this because the younger one ended up growing much taller than the older one. It's very... Is that what happened to you? Outside throwing the ball by yourself. What?

Because dad's just like not around. Yeah, dad's not around. These are the years I was... Yeah. But I mean like I know that Ava had a problem with her little sister getting taller than her. He's really only like a fourth of an inch taller than me now. But he also came up and became a way better athlete.

Yeah. He could throw a ball. Which my brother did too. Like I couldn't do a pull-up in high school and he won the Presidential Physical Fitness Award. I don't know if

they don't think they still do that. They did it when I was a kid though. Yeah, me too. They did it for you? Yeah. So you would rank get ranked.

Yeah. And my brother won it for the whole school. But he was like five years younger than me so I didn't really feel that because I was in college and I didn't care what he did in high school. But it did bother me that somehow I liked sports,

but I couldn't really be good at it because I'm me. And he didn't like sports at all. He liked rock climbing and skiing and gay stuff. But he could have used that athletic ability to be good at baseball or something, but he never wanted to. He never liked organized sports. I was just super proud of my brother.

You were? You weren't bothered at all? That you didn't... You know, we've talked about this before, and I swear to you, I honestly wasn't. Okay. Like, I thought it was so cool that I had, like, a badass for a brother. Okay.

Like, he would just destroy people in, like, every sport that he played. And I'm like, yeah, that's pretty cool. He's going to make us rich one day. Yeah, were you thinking that, NFL? You know, I wasn't really thinking that, but, I mean, we talked about this even just yesterday, right? JP Lossman? It's pretty sweet that I got to go to grad school almost completely for free because they didn't pay for his college. Because your parents didn't have to pay for that.

Mm-mm. But you have said they paid a lot of money to... Yeah, I mean, they did like the camp circuit and training and stuff like that. But as you well know, you'd have to go to a lot of camps to cover a semester of private school. Yeah, yeah. And he got a five-year deal. Is Tulane a high-dollar school? Oh my god.

Okay. These guys are all nodding. Yeah. I didn't look into Tulane. It's Harvard of the South. Can you do one pull-up now? I can do more than one. Want to do some pull-ups?? I can do more than one. Want to do some pull-ups? If we had a bar, that'd be fantastic.

Do you think that's a challenge that I can't actually back up? There's your 130 News. The Dumb Zone News. I'm just going to keep calling for that. Like and subscribe. I'm not saying anything. You know, I'm under the impression that we can say whatever we want.

Whatever the hell you want. Yeah. Okay. Let's do this. Speaking of that, I'm on The Freak today. Oh, yeah? What?

Let's see which one of us gets more subs. Well, I thought I would like, I need a bit. Like I'm going to go, like they're out at Buffalo Wild Wings in Grapevine, which this house we're at

is kind of close to the Freak Studios, so I thought they invited me for Thursday. I said, that'll be perfect because I'm really close to you.

And they go, yeah, we're in Grapevine. So, but I'll be closer to home, so that'll be great. But I didn't know if I should just sit in their shirt off or, you know, I need to do something and not just sit there and talk about whatever inane stuff they want to talk about. Definitely don't say anything nice about me, lest we put it together and make fun of you for it. Yeah, I know.

That'd be terrible if you made something that was really funny that people would like to hear. Yeah, I don't know. I'm trying to think. Shirt off's never a bad play. That's done well for you before. Pants off. Hadn't gone that route yet. Pants off off dance off yeah

you know a lot of people um dan and i talk about this from time to time but a lot of people forget that uh when they announced that dan and i were going to be working together and then like bob and corby would be working together uh fox four who has you know a really good relationship with the ticket they would have us in to like announce the new show um and they did this with bob and corby they did it with us and when they did it with us dan actually wore like a an actual chief wahoo like headdress and i dressed like uh the biker from the village people yeah we were two people from the village i was supposed to be the indian yeah and uh they were like but, why are you doing this? My outfit was offensive and yours

was just... Gay? Yeah. You looked very gay. You had like chaps. I spent two weeks on the outfit. And then they're like, what do you think? Do you feel like the Rangers can

replicate all these one-run wins? Yeah, the NBA draft is coming up. Yeah, we're like, I don't know. I feel silly now. I'm wearing leather. Yeah, and then they did invite those two and they were like wearing their ticket logo.

Anyway, today's Thursday, April 25th. Do I need to wrap this up? No. On this day... He's got a big radio appointment, buddy. Oh, yeah. On this day in 1901... I have a vape.

The first ever speed limit on highways in New York, 1901, 15 mile per hour speed limit. Was that funny? It's odd that they even had a highway. How many cars could there have been? 15 is not that fast. That's a long time ago, Blake. Can a golf cart go 15?

You take the governor off. You've absolutely done that, haven't you? You touch each corner of the screen and it unlocks it. And then, yeah, you go down to settings, and then there's the GPS thing. You've got to take that off. I trust him. You need it when you play in Arizona because desert golf.

They don't want you driving in the desert, but you've got to get to your ball. On this day in 1962, Harry Chidi is traded. He's a catcher for the Indians. Traded to the Mets for a player to be named later on this day in 1962. In June, June 15th, the Mets sent a player back. They sent back Harry Chidi. Trader for himself. He's the only player who's ever been traded for himself. Okay.

On this day in 1974, the NFL announced a few rule changes. the NFL announced a few rule changes. The main one was the goalpost move from the goal line to the back of the end zone. I knew that's what this was, and I cannot believe that that was ever the case. 1974. I cannot believe that. You would think, okay, the first year the NFL was 1941.

Okay, 1942 they decided... Hey, this thing is dangerous. We got a real hazard on our hands here. But no, that means the entirety of the AFL had it the same way. Was Picasso alive when they moved it back?

Picasso never saw it move back. He died in 1973, didn't he? I think so, yeah. It's shocking to me that we played football for that long. Think about just watch any game now and imagine there being a huge structure in the middle of the goal line. And they probably didn't have padding around it. Of course not.

It was just like, hey, if you run into it, that's like Darwinism. Yeah. You run a post? Your problem. I would like to see some of the NFL's most famous plays, but then put the goal post there. Like their Fridge Perry up the middle in the Super Bowl? Yeah.

Ride into it. The Seahawks Patriots? Yeah. Guys must have used it as a... Of course. Blocker or whatever. The pick play. The screen, yeah.

And to this day in 2006, Mavs head coach Avery Johnson was named NBA Coach of the Year. Hey, when are we doing MVP? When's that coming? I thought it should be like now. No, it's not in... It's definitely during the playoffs.

Yeah. It'll be... Because didn't Dirk get his while they were... No, after they got eliminated. Yeah. It'll be like next weekend probably. Yeah, it was not in the weekend. And there's only one reason he's asking this.

Me? Yeah. I'm a big fan of Luka. Of course. I'm hoping that he gets it. Birthdays today, Darren Woodson, 55. Weird sit down at the

Super Bowl a couple years ago. With us? Yeah. Yeah, that was weird. I think you two just saw Hot Women on Super Bowl Radio Row and had him come over and sit down. And then they ended up being his handler and he was pushing tequila or something. Yeah.

It was definitely booze. It was a booze company. Oh, okay. Was it the older lady and the younger lady and the young? They got upset when I guessed the wrong ages. Yeah. Yeah. And then, yeah.

Oh, yeah. Here's Darren Woodson. Oh, okay. All right. Adam Silver, 62. Here's Darren Woodson. Oh, okay. All right. Adam Silver, 62. He looks phallic. Yeah. Don't you think?

I agree. That's why I think I need facial hair because I used to have... When I first shaved my head, I had no facial hair and I thought I looked like a wiener. Like, I just feel like you need hair somewhere on a man's head. If you can't have it on the top of the head, you need it on the face. Get it somewhere? Yeah. No, I don't disagree with you.

A white man. For sure. Don't you think? Yeah. Like, Michael Jordan looked great. Bald head, bald face. But, like, around the same time, I feel like the Indiana Pacers

had done a bit where they would all shave their head for the playoffs in the Michael Jordan era and like Rick Smits looked phallic like any guy like that

I mean it also Scott Van Pelt look at him Scott Van Pelt looks like a penis yeah with glasses on yeah and it doesn't help if you're like

really tall and skinny yeah which Adam Silver is yeah like gangly It doesn't help if you're like really tall and skinny. Yeah. Which Adam Silver is. Yeah. Like gangly. Joe Buck, 55. Speaking of... Addicted to hair plugs.

Your hair falling out. Yeah. Tim Duncan, 48. Arch Schleester is 64. Blake, do you know who that is? No. Okay. I don't either.

The gambling... He was an Ohio State quarterback who was like addicted... No. Okay. I don't either. The gambling, he was an Ohio State quarterback who was addicted to gambling. Oh, yeah, yeah. It was like a point shaving thing? I don't know that he shaved points, but he was so into gambling, he owed so much. I mean, he went to prison. So I don't really know anything else but that. He's in jail again. Is he?

For what? Scamming older people out of their money. Just needs the juice. Dude, I was talking to a guy who's, you know him too. I'll tell you who it is later, but he's in his 70s. Wife died a couple years ago, so recent widower. I believe, yeah. So, speaking of scams he said uh because i was asking him about something oh i was asking him time zone thing

like i was going to call my daughter in uh france and he said oh it's uh eight hours ahead blah blah i know that because of some gal i've been chatting, I was chatting with in Italy. Oh, no. I go, really? He goes, yeah. It was going pretty good for a few months

until I figured out it was a scam. Like, so she was, you know, she, quote, unquote. Yeah, who knows if it was a she?

It was probably some dude for sure. Had him on the hook and romantic conversations for three months. So bad. And then he said it was like two months in. She started asking for money and then got indignant about it when he wouldn't send any. He said, you know, if we meet, then I would certainly, you know.

But at least he sniffed it out. Yeah, as it were, yeah. I think this goes back to your point of always just hoping to have less tea. Yeah, what's he doing? Like when you're old, like, yeah, I mean, I could be wrong, but I'm pretty sure that my grandfather never got horny again after my grandma died. Yeah, maybe it's not all about that. Maybe it's about connection or something.

I just don't think he was ever really looking to talk to anybody. Exactly. Yeah. He's happy just evaluating the chicks on the news. That's right. Al Pacino is 84. She's got a great ass. Great ass.

Let's see. Hank Azaria is 60. Legend. KCRW, right? Or no? You're thinking of Harry Shearer Le Show. Renee Zellweger, 55. Beasting Face.

That's what it says right here. Yeah. It does say Beasting Face. Marguerite Moreau, 47. I thought you would know. It says Connie in The Mighty Ducks. Oh, my goodness. Were you in love with her?

Yeah. Pretty great. Haven't you always just wanted a girl that could play hockey? Yeah, I mean, she was elite. Michael Lohan is 63. Is that her dad? The father of Lindsay. He's like a horrible person, right? Yeah, he used to always be in the news for stuff.

Kind of pimped her out or something type thing. And Vince Shalomi. Oh, my goodness. I think this is my... How does this keep coming up this week? I think this is one of my top five favorite Kim spins. It's 59.

You guys know Vince Shalomi? ShamWow and Slap Chop. And Bit of Hooker. Bit of Hooker? Mm-hmm. Like Marv Albert did? Yeah. I seem to recall it being a lot worse than Marv Albert's situation.

I don't know that Marv Albert's was necessarily a hooker, was it? It might have been. I think it was a gay transvestite is the way that the headline would read. Which does not preclude it from being a hooker. Yeah. Anyways, yeah. Slapchop. I had one. It worked

incredibly well. What is that? It slices, it dices, it... He was the infomercial guy. Anyway, he's 59. So how about that? Very surprised he's alive A lot of meth Oh yeah

Born on the stand now dead Guglielmo Marconi I think a fraud He did not invent radio I don't think so Did someone else actually do And then he kind of stole it from Yeah

Man History's full of that I know Damn it Hate hearing that about Guglielmo Marconi And Len Goodman stole it from him? Yeah. Man, history's full of that. I know. Damn it. I hate hearing that about Googly and Omar Khomey. And Len Goodman. You hold him in such high regard.

Yeah, he danced with the Stars judge. Didn't he just do that? Yeah, it's probably his death anniversary. Oh, wow. He died? At a close circle? Yeah, well, we're doing

Born on the Stay Now Dead. Oh, man. Sorry, guys. Sometimes he gets mad at Blake. Wow. Died last year. Pretty recently, right? Because we just did this like three days ago or something.

Hey, I got to say something. This gentleman over here with the... Who does he look like? He looks like Julie Dobbs' husband. No, no, no, no, no. The gentleman who's seated. Oh. First of all...

He is sitting in a wheelchair and then he stood up. How did he just get up? Much like FDR. I didn't want to say the guy in the wheelchair because I was trying to be cool. Right, the guy in the wheelchair because I was trying to be cool. Right, the guy in the hat. Why has he been in a wheelchair this whole time? But doesn't he look like...

There's an actor he looks like. Do you think it's Mike Ehrmantraut? Maybe. No? I'm going to find it. But I googled gray hair, beard, white guy in the break, and I didn't come up with anything. Emmanuel Lewis.

It's not Emmanuel Lewis. But I'm really thrown off by the wheelchair now. That's pretty great. That was. Died on this day, still dead. Anders Celsius, who invented the energy drink. Okay, that's pretty good too. And Lisa Left Eye Lopez.

Died on this day in 2002. Oh, as did B. Arthur, Maude. Do you know who B. Arthur is or no?

Yeah. Okay. Yeah, Golden Girls. I always liked the Jeff Ross joke. Yeah.

You know the Jeff Ross joke? Does it involve Andy Dick? No, it involves, he's like, something Dick? No, it involves... He's like...

I wouldn't... Something about a woman. It's like he'll be making fun of Monique or something and doing a roast and say, yeah, I wouldn't...

We'll go NSFLW right here, but I wouldn't fuck her with B.R. for their dick. Yeah. So, I didn't stick the landing net to that. Speaking of,

did you see there's going to be a Tom Brady roast? Uncensored on Netflix? It depends who's in and I'm in. But if it's going to be like Tom Brady's friends, I don't want to see it. Well, I think Kevin Hart is the part of it. Probably Jeff Ross. Who?

All right. Anyway. Aaron Hernandez. He's dead. Probably Jeff Ross. Huh? Who? All right, anyway. Aaron Hernandez. He's dead. And that was today in history. He'll probably be there. It's time for closing remarks. Whose birthday is it? Are we bringing that guy in for closing remarks?

Oh, he doesn't want to do closing remarks? Okay. All right. Yeah, Kevin Hart's hosting. Look, if his own friends, or if he doesn't want to do it, he's... Okay.

Neither do we. Yeah. Do you want to at least ask this guy about his bit? Being in the wheelchair? Sure, go ahead. Do you want to take his... You've already stood up. You don't have to wheel over here.

So I know that we wanted to ask Dan if he had a funny joke. A campound style joke. I have to be prepped for that, my friend. Yeah, I figured. I can't just use the same stuff, can I? Dutch now. There's a guy who always has a funny joke.

Dutch died. Oh. That's not a bad way to end. Adios, mofo. adios You see me in the bed and I fight for honey on my self You see me in the bed and I fight for honey on my self You see me in the bed and I fight for honey on my self Honey on my self, honey on my self You see me in the bed and I fight for honey on my self You see me in the bed and I fight for honey on my self You see me in the bed and I fight for honey

on my self Honey on my self, honey on my self You see me in the bed and I fight for honey on my self You see me in the bed and I fight for honey on my self We'll see you next time. Here we go. Here we go. Yes, here we go. Yes, here we go. Yes, here we go. Yes, here we go. Here we go.