The Dumb Zone FREE - The Dumb Zone 5-13-24

Episode Date: May 13, 2024

Listen to every show of The Dumb Zone by subscribing to our Patreon - Patreon.com/TheDumbZoneInterested in minerals and stuff? irocks.com _ mineralauctions.comJoin Dan McDowell and Jake Kemp as they venture into the mesmerizing realm of fine minerals at The Arkenstone gallery, where natural artistry and history crystallize into a spectacular display. In this episode, The Dumb Zone crew delves into the world of mineral collecting with gallery owner Rob Lavinsky, exploring everything from the thrill of discovering Earth's ancient treasures to the perils of international mineral trafficking.Witness the unexpected intersection of science, art, and commerce as Rob shares tales of being detained by Interpol, navigating the complexities of Chinese bureaucracy, and the transformative journey from genetic engineering to becoming a purveyor of nature's most exquisite creations. Plus, get the lowdown on the surprising market for minerals as an asset class and the passion that fuels collectors' pursuits.Amid the serious discussions, the episode isn't without its lighter moments, as Rob humorously recounts his escapades across the globe and the team's off-the-cuff banter about everything from eclipse excitement to the economics of family planning in China. It's a deep dive into a niche that's as fascinating as it is misunderstood.Whether you're a seasoned mineral enthusiast or simply curious about the hidden gems of the natural world, this episode of The Dumb Zone is not to be missed. So, grab your geologist's hammer and join the adventure – it's time to rock the Dumb Zone! (00:00) - Open (18:25) - Sports: Dan and Jake went to Mavs game 3 (01:12:01) - Explaining Drake vs. Kendrick to Dan (01:28:57) - Viewer Mail (01:35:26) - News (01:56:01) - Today in History (02:14:34) - Rob Lavinsky ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Hello, I'm Dan McDowell, longtime professional broadcaster. Why subscribe to our Patreon podcast? Well, perhaps you support our struggle to get out from under the oppressive thumb of the man. Or, objectively, if you sign up at patreon.com slash the dumb zone, you'll get the two episodes per week that are available on all podcast platforms, like this one, plus an additional two episodes each week that are exclusive to Patreon. So subscribing on Patreon gets you four episodes per week.

Oh my, what a bargain. Now, on to today's program. The Dunza, Dunza, Dunza You know, Joseph, a few problems in the beginning, but you did make a pretty problems in the beginning, but... ...did make a pretty good team. Yeah, we did some good stuff.

What do you say? You still wanna be partners? Like Butch and Sundance? Yeah, like Martin and Lewis? Burt and Arnie! No puppets. Alright, alright, alright, alright, alright Alright, alright, alright, alright, alright No puppets. Happy Monday, everyone. It is the Bert and Ernie of content creators.

I'm Dan McDowell. I'm Jay Kemp. I'm Blake Jones. Open for business'm Jay Kemp. I'm Blake Jones. Open for business. There it is. That's right. And today our business is, we're doing some video today, so we got Video Man over there doing his thing. And we're out.

We're not high above my garage. We're not at our studio, home away from home. We are at a fine mineral gallery, which also is not like you can just walk in here. You can get in here by appointment. It's called the Arken Store. Did you know that? Arken Stone.

The Arken Stone. Gosh, damn it. Thank you for respecting our Lord. Gosh, damn it. That's right. Rocks and stuff. Well, I've had a difficult morning containing my cursing. Yeah, I eavesdrop on you guys a lot, and I'm very interested about what happened.

Well, I'm trying to minimize my talking on the phone where I'm holding the phone. So a lot of times I actually have a good set of headphones in the car with me, but also sometimes you just have to use the Bluetooth. Now, my Bluetooth is a little bit janky for some reason that I don't understand. Do you believe him, Dan? About what? That he makes an effort to make clear phone calls? No. Well, I sacrifice the ability to make the clear phone calls with holding the phone.

I don't like doing that. Especially... I mean, that's what I do to make sure we have a clean phone call. I don't want to be the one to ruin the phone call for everyone else.

Yeah. But then you got the... And the echo. Just cool. Okay, guys. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We can hear you. So I called Dan this morning.

Because we had another phone call and we needed to have a little pregame plan for it. A little business Monday morning. That's right. For your heroes. I said, hey, Nora's in the car because a lot of times when I call Dan, he will answer with a slur. Shock value fun. It's fun for the whole. It's not fun for the whole family. Fun for the whole family. That's the problem. It's fun for you.... It's not fun for the whole family.

Fun for the whole family. That's the problem. It's fun for you. So before he could even say anything... But you're right. I said, hey, whoa. Nora in the car. I just need a minute.

We'll only talk for a couple minutes here, then we can go. Because I know that if we get past five minutes, you're going to start twitching and need to use a slur. Yes. It's usually just an opener, and I'm not... The weird thing is I'm not really a big profanity guy. As you know, I just... You keep saying that.

Am I? Do you think I am, like, in real life? I think you're bigger than you think you are, but it doesn't matter. Thanks. Whatever. You're welcome, big dog. So he's like, oh, no, hey, it's cool. So we talked for a couple minutes.

And then... I know what led to the BS word, if you want me to tell you, because we had a phone meeting and it was with a prospective client doing a remote or whatever. And it was like, Jake's like, I might be a couple minutes late

because I got to drop her off right at school at 930 but then the meeting starts at 930 I go well you know it's only the you know the first couple minutes of these meetings

it's just a bunch of bullshit to get to know and Jake goes dude dude I go what he goes I got the daughter in the car oh damn

yeah but that alerts her then that Dan just said something that she should start saying. Yeah. Would she have ignored it if Jake didn't stop down? Maybe. Well, she ignored it

when he was like, it'll just be a bunch of fucking around. Oh. But bullshit, that one hit hard enough to where when we got off the phone, she was asking me, what is bullshit? Well, let's just say, let's look at the positive here.

That's the one you'd want her to focus on, right? That's true. If she is going to ever remember something. That is true. But she is a very smart kid, and she will hear something and then need to know it, need to have something explained. Like, I love that kid. I love her logic, her breaking something down, her explaining a picture to me. Like, I don't think it'll be a problem with my son.

Because he just won't care. He's a caveman. His first word will be bullshit. But with her... Just by nature. Probably, yeah. But with her, Just by nature. Probably, yeah. But with her, she definitely wants to know. Damn.

And have things... I'm so sorry. It's okay. I feel terrible. What are we going to do? Well, the weird part about it was like after I was like, hey, remember she's in the car, you were like, tell that cunt to shut up. Oh my God.

That seems a bit harsh. But I shouldn't have done it. I know. Is what you're saying. Well, there's the story, Blake. Now he's all dejected. Who? Me?

Dan. Yeah, no. He'll bounce back. I hope to bounce back. I want to do a Mother's Day back, though, because I do want to let everyone... I don't think we talked about this on Friday. We didn't do our Mother's Day preview show because I do want to let everyone... I don't think we talked about this on Friday. We didn't do our Mother's Day preview show that we do annually. That's true, yeah.

But I do need to remind everybody of this. And I should have done it reminding everyone that I know, like in my house. Mother's Day... Yeah, this did not play for me. Is for... Mother's Day... Yeah, this did not play for me. ...is for... So who has to throw you a party for Mother's Day?

Your kids. If you are a mother, like Mother's Day, what you celebrate is your mother. We all got one. Yeah. Somewhere along the line. We don't... It's pretty much at the beginning of the line. It's not a day to celebrate every... Like the beginning of the line. It's not a day to celebrate every...

Like, I don't send a text to your mom. No. Or to your wife. To my knowledge. Yeah. Or whatever. And your wife is a mother. But I don't...

Is it coming upon me to send her a text? No. And yeah, so I had to explain to my wife why I didn't really do any, argued, had another, I argued with my wife this weekend because, and she was lamenting that she,

she's like, oh man, how about Mother's Day for me? I had to fold laundry and I'm like thinking in my head that laundry's been lying there all weekend. Like it could have been done on Saturday. It could also just be called part of living here. Yeah, I mean you got to still make food and eat and then clean

and you probably had to wipe your bottom. I'm sure you didn't get to actually just do zero all day. You brushed your own teeth. No one did that for you. Yeah, this, we were talking, and I'm sure we'll talk about this quite a bit, our field trip together on Saturday. But this version of, well, Dan says, it did not play well for me at home. I was like, well, you're not my mom, though.

Right. I was like, that's how Dan does it. That did not work well for me at all. WDD. And then what you find yourself doing is like the double back version of, okay, I can go buy a gift now but I've already been told that I should do it so is it it's definitely not as good as like doing it beforehand but is it worse than doing nothing see my thing was like I my effort is that I always did something with the girls. Yeah, and Nora made something at her therapy class.

It was a little pot of... Okay, see, this is where you're losing. Because it was mandated? This is where you're losing the argument. Yeah, if the school had her make something, well, you didn't do anything. Yeah, but what was I going to do? Do another one?

Yeah. Yeah, it needs to come from you. Yeah, you need to go to... But they'd already done it. You need to go do a different thing. You need to go to... But they'd already done it. You need to go to a different... Do a different thing. You need to go get her handprint in a plate or, you know, that kind of...

I've done all that. How many times? The hand looks exactly the same. See, we would go to... But it's bigger now. We would go to the clay place, whatever. I can't remember what it was called. Pottery.

It was a pottery thing. Something. We've done this. It's already on the list but the place on Carroll you know it used to be there

yeah but we would go there every year and so you know even when she was four or whatever she did something

every year we would do it and occasionally when I'm there with her like I would I'll make a outline thing of my hand as well and I send it to my mom Every year we would do it. And occasionally, when I'm there with her, I'll make an outline thing of my hand as well, and I send it to my mom. And then she thinks that's funny.

40-year-old son sends her the handprint plate. But now... You did your junk. The end result is, now we have a shelf with 10 years of Little Eden's. Yeah, I should have done that. Okay, great. Thanks. But I had a pot for a plant that was painted by her.

That's a good thing. That I had known about for a couple weeks. Maybe you go buy the plant. Well, the plant came from the school. I take her to the therapy. This has been in the works for three weeks. Yeah, that's interesting.

You do all that. And it did not. Didn't go well? No. No. Not at all. Did you tell her, you know what,

this will be great after makeup sex. That's all we got to do. How about some sex right now? You know what, that's exactly what I did. As you're recording? Yeah. Just to make sure we can all enjoy it as well.

And the cool thing about my mom, all my mom wants to do is see my kids. Yeah. So I just went over there for a few hours. You know what I did for my mom? Gave her a nice phone call. I told her, how about this for a Mother's Day present? Your second phone call this week? Whoa.

Don't get greedy. I talked to her like Friday. And she was very impressed. Now, my mom told me. Now, here's the scam that I know these ladies are in on. My mom says, oh, Rose's daughter texted me this morning. Okay. Some other lady that she knows texted her uh my brother's wife texted her my wife

had sent her a card i just want to be clear your mom is not any of their moms and that's what i said to her i said wait so this is a whole big thing just so ladies can like compliment each other on oh you were also a mom. Cool. Yeah. Happy mother's day. Yeah. Happy mother's day.

Happy mother's day to you, you know? And then these, uh, ladies that are infertile where we're supposed to then just, uh, kind of look down upon them. And I'm sure that, uh,

I'll bet you like, there's no doubt. There's some ladies that require a mother's Day gift because they have a dog. My little fur baby. Probably so. I don't think I associate with anyone like that, but you're probably right. Dan's right. They exist.

They definitely exist. They definitely exist. My wife pointed me to a meme that said that anybody that has had your boobs in their mouth owes you a Mother's Day gift. Okay. Okay. It's funny. That is a good one. I was like, you know.

Well, there could be a long list, though, for my wife. I know. Or for you. What'd you do for Mother's Day, Blake? Scattered gifts all across Ohio. Yeah, I'm not... So many. We're not gift people, so... Oh, that's nice.

How did you marry one of those? Yeah, you just... You got to scout. Yeah. That wasn't on your dating tip list. Yeah. Yeah, I should get into what you're supposed to look for. No, I, Saturday night is kind of my video game night.

How does he still have one of these? It's great. Because I put the kid down, she goes to bed, and then at like 10 o'clock I have the house to myself So I want to do whatever I want to do For as long as I want to do it with no distractions So How late do you go?

That's what I was going to bring up This is the first time in a long time I've stayed up till sunrise Jesus, what? What are you doing? I just wanted to know that I still had it in me. Look, 34. 32.

But I still got it. That kind of made me feel good. That is great because I couldn't do that. No chance. She's starting to work weekends so she actually had to work Mother's Day and so I went and got her breakfast and coffee and just kind of sent her off to work. Without going to sleep.

Right. I was there at the donut shop when they flipped the light on at 530. Nice. And so got her some donuts, got her a big coffee, said happy Mother's Day and sent her off. And then she came home to- Now what do you do? You have the boy all day. You have the boy and now you haven't slept.

Yeah, I slept from 630 to00 and then just went about the day. What a baller. Unbelievable. What a high T you have. I want to maximize my weekend. You have so much T. Are you not still tired like two days later? Like I'm tired today from going to the Mavs game during the day on Saturday.

No, if I can just get a good night's sleep, I'm good to go. Jeez, man. Respect. Yeah. We'll play some basketball tonight. I'll watch the Mavs game probably until 1 a.m. What do you mean we'll play basketball? You have a weekly game? I got a Monday night pickup group. Nice. Look at this guy.

Unreal. He has it all. No, I just... You really can have it all. I can just feel myself losing things for my youth. I need to check in on them every once in a while. Now I'm happy a lot of things are gone for my youth, man.

I don't need to do stuff. Like what? Just anything. No, I don't. You don't use it, you lose it. I don't want to lose it yet. Okay. Well, it's kind of good losing it. Then you can just sit around and complain about everything. That's what I do.

About the dishes on Mother's Day. Yeah. Well, I'm sorry about the profanity with the daughter. I didn't want to be the one to teach her that bad word. It's okay. I can't believe with you and your wife that she hasn't heard that before i'm actually uh really really good about keeping it clean really my wife has some issues okay but i would say that they're less than six times i've cursed in front of my daughter

now there was a time uh very early on and i i believe this was just because of the way that the continents work like it really hit for her she heard me say fuck it and that like immediately landed with her as like that is a really cool thing to say like you saying the bs word or a damn or something like those don is a really cool thing to say. Like you saying the BS word or a damn or something, like those don't sound that cool. Yeah. But so did she get the context like when something was wrong? Yes.

Oh, okay. Well, that's good. I told you she's smart. Very intelligent. Yeah. Like I would say like, hey, you know. As you're explaining to your wife, hey, this is a positive of this.

Look how she just knew how to use it. Fuck it. Yeah. I'm like, yeah, well. How'd you beat that out of her? Yeah. It took time. Yeah.

But we got it done. You just got to say it more. Right. I think that's the key. That's what you did with the N-word, right? Yeah. Then you can take the power away from it by just making it too common. Yeah.

No, the biggest battle that we're fighting, and I think I told you guys about this a little bit a week or so ago, is my son is getting put in the penalty box at school quite a bit. For? Tackling. Really? Yeah. There's some smaller children,

same age, but smaller kids, and he's been... He's been tackling. Do you have a little bit of pride inside, actually? Is he the Lou Dort of the class? He might have a little... He's bigger than... Relatively bigger than Lou Dort,

but yeah, he's got some Lou Dort-like tendencies over the past few weeks. Does that mean you want to slide into sports? This guy. Just throwing you an alley-oop. Because I was wondering if, I was wondering today, well, here's, I'll just open it with sports. Bum, bum, bum, bum. That's what we do here.

Bum, bum, bum, bum, bum. We talk sports and child rearing. Radio sports. Scoreboard. On the Dumb Zone. And find minerals. That's right. This place is really cool mineralauctions.com if you're a collector hey what do you have some spare minerals don't call me uh i thought you'd be uh juiced about paul ske. Is he on our fantasy team yet? Do you know Paul Skeens?

I don't. Is this baseball? Somebody drafted him and sat on him because he would be up soon. Yeah, he's the hot prospect. He's like today's Strasburg, right? I would say he's more Livvy Dunn's boyfriend, but yeah, I guess he's a pretty good pitcher. Is that how people know him? Oh, is that the one that Baby Gronk rizzed up?

Oh my God, yes. He's got a cool mustache. Is he from LSU? Yeah, he went to LSU. What did he start at? Air Force, I think? No, he's... Was he the number one overall pick?

Oh yeah, he's dominant. Yeah. His ERA and AAA was under one. I think he hit 100. He hit 100. Why would he have gone to AAA? He probably could have started in the majors. Maybe.

But there were some rumors going around that they held his call-up until after gymnastic season so Livvy could be there. That's disgusting, but I love it. It could work then for service time and that. Sure, yeah. I'm sure the union is thrilled about that. No, he is the next Strasburg. But I think if you're good enough,

the service time lapse will not affect you, right? Like there's metrics you can hit or something? Isn't there? Or like Rookie of the Year, if you get that. I should have looked this up, but I think they're incentivizing ignoring the service time thing now. Like MLB has put something in

to reward you for calling up prospects early. I think it's since Chris Bryant, right? Is that what started? I don't know. Because they did manipulate his time. Yeah. I think that's probably what... Right.

I'm a baseball guy. Of course you are. You're a seam head. But we're really not here to talk about Paul Skeens. But we will. There was a very real chance that you were going to forget that name when you tried to say it a second time.

No, not at all. Not at all. But we are here to talk about the Dallas sports teams. And who better to lead us off than if I take a look at Twitter and I can see right here Mayor Eric Johnson of the city of Dallas. Sportsman!

I love sports! Sportsman! I love sports! Sportsman! I love sports! Sportsman! I love sports! Sportsman!

Sportsman! Sportsman. I love sports. Sportsman. Sportsman. Sportsman. But according to J.K.'s the mayor really does that. I do. I admit it.

I love sports. Sportsman. Well done. Tweets out hello win column. Yeah. Two to one series lead.

Proud of our Dallas Mavs. Fire emoji Two to one series lead. Proud of our Dallas Mavs. Fire emoji. One hundo emoji. Clapping hand emoji. Yeah, it would have been... Clam emoji. Or clan. Clan, that's what I thought you said.

Well, he has switched sides before. Whoa. If it could... If the wind is blowing in a certain way, he will put on the hood. Indeed. Now, odd, though, that he seems to be on both the sports teams, but he ignored the Stars. No tweets all weekend about the Stars.

That's interesting because he's got the bet, right? He's got a belt buckle on the line. What's the second one? Rangers or Wings? I didn't hear your whole thing. I because he's got the bet, right? He's got a belt buckle on the line. What's the second one? Rangers or Wings? I didn't hear your whole thing. I know he's on the Mavs. Oh, hashtag Dallas. No, he's ignoring the stars. He only had one.

Oh, okay. I thought you said two. No, he only supported the stars. Because he will tweet about the Wings on you. Of course he will. Yeah, a little virtue signal. But he ignored the stars, and he has a belt buckle on the line. He doesn't want to jinx it. Do you see the Stars bit where a lot of Stars fans yell Stars in Colorado? And then it's a very odd piece of just moment in our culture, I guess,

because then, because you know the anthem, there's nothing like the anthem. It's the greatest thing ever, and you can't insult the anthem. And then there's just a chorus of boos in the anthem. Yeah. Because they're booing the people that yelled stars during the anthem. What a conundrum. Yeah. Yeah.

I mean, similar in the first round, you'd have the people yell stars, and then the Knights fans would yell Knight. And so that was a funny back and forth. But yeah, abs are just going to boo. Does he have a Mavs bet? How have I not heard about the Oklahoma City mayor?

Who's the Oklahoma City mayor? I don't know if Oklahoma City has anything to barter. That probably is true. Weed. They could give us some weed. It's true. Anyway, that's what we did on Saturday. Dan and Jake.

What a freaking day. Went to the Mavs game. Did you ride together? We did, as a matter of fact. We did. How about that? Teamed up. It was...

Dan and Jake are cheap when we have to pay for parking and find parking. But that's how I saw the daughter and everything. Yeah. Chill on the parking thing. I said we had to pay for parking.

Okay. That's why it was only one of us. All right, yeah. One car. Are you aware of the narrative of does Luca affect winning? Yeah. Like how Mavs Twitter went from Saturday until this morning?

It's silly. It's a pretty big account. It's Matt Moore. He's worked at everywhere, CBS Sports, and his whole bit is like, does Luka affect winning? Yeah. In the positive. Of course yeah like his point is that like Luka's a losing player.

Well I think that's a ridiculous point. And he's like one of the probably 5 to 10 biggest basketball accounts out there. Yeah let's take Luka off the team. I'm sure they'd be much better. And I think the tweet that he had that got everybody really fired up

was like, it's not crazy to think that the Mavericks get swept without P.J. Washington. And then, of course, a lot of people replied like, it's not crazy to think

that the Bulls win zero championships without drafting Michael Jordan and Scottie Pippen. Well, I mean, take Kyrie off this team. Do the Mavericks

get swept? Take anybody off any team. Take SGA off the Thunder. Take Luke off the team. Do they get swepts get swept? Take anybody off any team. Take SGA off the Thunder. Take Luke off the team. Do they get swept? Yeah, the Thunder are really good. Yeah. And yeah, you're going to need all of these parts to win.

But no. It's ridiculous, too, because as I've told you guys, all those numbers that you can look at as far as shot quality created by passes, I know it's a bit of an esoteric stat, but it's like a lob. That's two points or 1.9, right? Like a wide open three in the corner. Let's say that you're a 40% shooter. That's a 1.3 like created attempt. Luka destroys the entire league in that stat every year. So everybody who plays with him gets better.

And we're still having this conversation about whether or not he affects winning. I mean... He should have won the MVP this year. You can't get too worked up over it because that's the level Luka is at. It's not really worked up over it. It's like the level LeBron is at. If I put LeBron in this, it's going to get the people

going. If I do a cowboy thing, it's going to get the people going. Yeah, and Dak is definitely in that category, but I don't know. It feels like there was a point at which we stopped having this conversation about Dirk. It's probably just when he won. Yeah. Yeah, Dirk was soft. Dirk would never win having this conversation about Dirk. It's probably just when he won.

Yeah. Yeah. Dirk was soft. Dirk would never win the big one. Dirk, you know, he'll be Barkley in the end. He'll be very, very, very good, but just could never do it because it's, and then we blame him. Not the organization, not the coach, not the team.

Not the people around him. Yeah. Not the coach, not the team. Not the people around him. Yeah. But really, for both Luka and Kyrie to have not exactly huge box score games, although I think Luka did have 15 rebounds, didn't he? Yeah.

Rebounding your own miss helps. Even without either one of them having a 40-point game, I just feel like they were in control together the entire time. P.J. Washington's great. It's awesome to have Derek Lively be able to knock down a couple free throws late in the game, but to me, even if it's just 22 points for each of them, Luka and Kyrie, they're the two best players on the floor. For sure.

And they're the reasons the other guys get open. Yeah. And they're the reasons they can get them the ball because it's not always that easy either. No, I mean, they're going after Kyrie. He's getting the – he honestly might be getting more attention than Luka is right now because Luka's hobbled.

Boy, Luka's getting pummeled though. He is getting pummeled for sure, but Kyrie's hobbled. Boy, Luka's getting pummeled, though. He is getting pummeled, for sure. But Kyrie's getting doubled. Yeah. Honestly, I wish they could sit Luka for a game. I know that's not an option. You just need to end this thing by whatever the case would be. Wednesday night.

That'd be great. Get him a week, maybe. Especially with the other series being a 2-2 now, with Denver leveling it up. But, man, he looks rough. And it's not just one thing. No. It's his right knee.

It's his left ankle. It's his back. I didn't pull the audio, but they asked him, and he just gave the everything. And that's pretty much all he said, everything. No, I mean's it is funny i mean we are we got mavs glasses on but it does seem that the amount that you have to touch uh sga versus the amount that you have to touch luca. And it happened like with Shaq. You know, you're so much bigger

that it's going to take more for somebody to call a foul on you. How evident was that in person? I mean... I thought it was insane. I'll let him tell you what I thought because I was screaming. Yeah, no. He was just getting mugged, man.

Yeah. It was great, though. Are you excited that Dan got to see? What a fun atmosphere. You at a game? Yeah. Yes. I was also.

I mean, I've seen you watching cowboy games. You stand up. I know, but in person, though. It's one thing to do it in the den. Yeah, no, you're intense. You're an intense fan. I was amused by it. He wanted to yell.

And I'm like, what is that going to do? He's like, I want to yell something about Giddy. Late in the game, I was like... Who besides the people right around us are even going to know you did that? But that's what I wanted. I know, but he said before. I wanted to make you laugh. He's afraid of getting mean.

Someone filming him or taking a picture and then it living forever. That's what you need. We need it. The show needs it. The Giddy thing is weird, right? What? What did he play, like 11 minutes? He can't shoot.

He can't defend anybody either. Yeah, you brought up plus minus earlier. His is atrocious. Well, I almost think it's weird he started in game three. Yeah. Yeah, no, I mean, that's right. There were people saying, like, I don't think he's playable. They played him in the first half,

and then he pretty much didn't see the floor again. And that's what happened game two, right? Yeah. He wasn't starting in the second half of game two. Yeah. The whole bit is, though, he's really good, and he started every game this year. Or every game he's played, he has started.

Right. And so... Except for the couple where they had to PR hide him. Yeah. That's right, because he was hanging out with a 14-year-old or 16-year-old or something. I was amused at your jersey choice. Oh.

How do you know? I had a friend of mine sit behind you. Oh, really? And he sent me a picture of y'all. Oh. Okay. That's very Dan. Jake was wondering,

is that the only jersey of its kind in the building today? Oh, without a doubt. We walked in there. Are you nodding like it's the only jersey of its kind in Dallas right now? Anywhere. Yes. Someone else owns that. Yeah.

We walked in. They need to put the call out. So Dan has his Wong Shu Shu jersey on. Right. It says Wang on the back. It says Wang. That's how you spell it. We walked in and I was like, dude, there are 18,000 people here right now.

And one of them has a Wong jersey. So I was actually – That's the stupidest part about it is I was telling my wife about it at night, and she was like, was he just a fan? I'm like, no. It's because his name is Wang. I don't have to explain this to you. So I wanted to just – I'm dressing for Jake.

I can't go black t-shirt, and you're going to the Mavs game. And I know they're going to give you a t-shirt on your chair, which, by the way, mine got stolen. It did. I think ours got stolen, too. I think so. Like, we left it...

Oh, we went away at halftime. I went to see my usher friend, Tammy, and came back, and yeah, the t-shirts are gone. I'm looking at the people around us like, what, are you just going to let somebody walk up here and take our t-shirts? When I came back to our seats before you, there were two people sitting in our seats. The hell? And when they, so I just sat like in a seat next to them, and when they got up, they left

with both shirts. Why didn't you say something? Dude, it just felt like at that time, like would you have? Yes. I would have been like, hey, those are our seats. Those are our shirts. I would have. You don't want that shirt.

I want it for the studio. Okay. I'm going to hang it in the studio. Would I have been like, give me both of them? Yeah. Yeah, they're not theirs. It's not theirs. I don't know if it was a husband and wife, but it was a male and a female.

You know what we paid for those seats? But it was just like- Top dollar. That I want to- Hard-earned American dollars. Stop them as they got up to leave? Yes. I'm sorry.

I was just sitting there mad all weekend about the people around us. I didn't realize you were there. They walked off with two shirts. Maybe they had the shirts beforehand. But they definitely sat in there. They walked off with two shirts. Maybe they had the shirts beforehand. But they definitely sat in our seats and walked off with two shirts. And I did nothing about it. And you're Jake.

You go high tea and I'm trying to change. I told you guys, whether it's the cop or the election. I like old Jake, I think. Try to chill out, man. Yeah, we don't need that, man. Not during this playoff run. Because I was very close to...

Because we were on the side where the Thunder's bench was, where we were on the baseline. But Josh Giddey could have heard me. I don't know, man. That place is nothing but a wall of noise. What about a free throw? Or like right after a free throw, and I was going to give him like the, you know,

13, that's a little too high for you today, Giddy. All right. And I only wanted to do it to make Dan laugh. And I just did. There, you did it. Yeah. Do you like my free throw idea? I told my buddy with the Cavs this weekend,

and he's like, that's brilliant. It would work. The free throw idea is that the entire crowd goes pin drop silent. The home crowd. To affect the only shooter. I feel like you could never do it in Dallas. No. But I think the Oklahoma City crowd could start.

Someone's going to start this, and it's going to lead to copycats. Like you're used to shooting the entirely raucous free throw. Like, oh, I'm clapping these rubber things together, these plastic things together. But if everybody went silent, I actually think it would be. Dead silent. No music.

All you can hear is that ball bouncing. Remember how weird it was before they started piping in stuff? Like at the bubble? The pandemic, yeah. Or, yes, even once they started playing in arenas, you could kind of hear, and you'd hear the shoes squeak and the coach yelling from across. I think that's part of the Haralabob story, right?

It was an empty arena, but somebody saw or heard Haralabob bitch or something, but Haralabob, you know, you would have never seen Haralabob get up or yell something if it was in an arena with club music piped in. But yes, totally. So Josh Giddey goes up to the free throw line, starts bouncing it in dead silence.

Wouldn't that be amazing? You just need a fan base that would do good bits, and Dallas is not that. No. They're there for their own bit. I don't know if that would work. It would just throw them off. Do you remember they had one NBA game where they actually didn't have music for the game? Yeah.

And they all said they were so thrown off. Wasn't it? And Devin Booker threw the Raptors mascot out because he was dancing for the game. Yeah. And they all said they were so thrown off. Wasn't it? And Devin Booker threw the Raptors mascot out because he was dancing behind the goal. Oh, okay. Was it like Knicks or something? I was going to say it was at MSG, yeah. Yeah.

But I could be wrong. Like they just stopped. I think, was it the Warriors? Somebody was really bitching about it after the game. Like that they, how could they do that and blah, blah, blah, and it was just terrible. I think that would be the best bit. It doesn't matter how often you go to

Mavs games. It is just a constant reminder of just being assaulted with sensory overload. My gosh. Like I got home and I had both, really only one kid for most of the time, but I'm just like, can you just shut up?

Just, it's been so loud all day. A din of sound. Just please stop. Yeah. There's no, I mean, even when we talked,

I couldn't hear you unless you held your hand over your mouth to direct the sound. I was going to ask how the crowd was because during the Clippers series, it was awesome. It was loud, dude. Was it? Okay. I thought it was extremely. I wrote that down like three times in the second quarter. Like it is loud in here. Does everybody hate SGA? Yeah I mean I think it's

just more of the you boo him when he goes to the foul line. Yeah. But he's not hardened. No. You know you don't have have that sort of background with him. We're getting it, though. Probably. He'll get there. Every game, we're hating and knowing these guys more and more. The Lou Dort thing, for sure. Oh, my God. Lou Dort. Oh, did you see Mahomes? We did. Dan pointed him out

to me. And we saw Jimmy Goldstein. Jimmy Goldstein was on the sideline? I tweeted a video of Jimmy. It was a Kyrie shot this morning or maybe it was yesterday morning like he doesn't appear conscious.

Yeah. He's so old. Yeah. What's his thing. He's a slumlord. OK. Lots and lots of money and he just goes to he

picks a playoff game every day. and flies there and goes to it. I don't know if this is. Front row seat. We can't even imagine the amount of money he must have. No, and I can't recall if this is still the case, but for a long time he had a press pass, like a locker room press pass. Oh, really? Mm-hmm.

I don't recall that. The Kim Spinless says everyone loves him because he's rich, but he's a terrible person who's forced people out of their mobile homes. This is true. He bought up like an entire portion of LA's mobile home parks, jacked the rates and rents up by like 500%, and a bunch of old people had to move out. I think Jake was fired up because it was pre-Mother's Day.

And so Mother's Cam. Mother's Cam was popping for sure. A lot of sauced up moms dancing and bouncing. That was definitely happening. Early on, very concerned about Josh Green.

We were wondering if he'd get a stat that wasn't a foul. He was at the 0-0-0-0-3. Yeah, yeah. But, you know. Hit a couple shots. Hit a couple shots. SGA, man. I noted this from our, and we were sitting like behind the backboard.

So we didn't have a great angle on everything. But man, the elbows that that guy throws, he does it so often it has to be intentional. Even the ones that look unintentional. Yeah. Were you on the side where he elbowed Luka? Or was that on the far side from you? I feel like he did elbow Luka three times.

Well, they reviewed one of them. We were not on that one. But we did get another one that was pretty close. Yeah, I don't know if it's intentional or not, but it seems like he drives to draw fouls. Get away with it. Let's see my notes.

It's cool, though, because I had this feeling on Saturday, and maybe this is disrespectful to the Thunder and to the Timberwolves, but it does feel like this has a Mav Spurs feel to it. What do you mean? Just a little rivalry? We're going to be here for a while. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They're good.

They're young. We're good. We're not going to get all of them. And they're going to have players that you absolutely effing hate. Yeah. And they're not that far away. It feels so good, doesn't it? Yeah, of course it does.

Yeah. I mean, what? That's probably roughly the same distance. Yeah. And it's going to be this way for a while. We hope. I'm a little more bullish on their future than ours. Yeah, they have the –

As long as you got Luka, dude. I know, but what if you don't? You have a chance. They're in the second round of the playoffs, and they have the 12th pick in the draft. Yeah, and then that keeps going and going and going and going. But it's cool. It feels like what you get from a Boston-Philadelphia type thing

or Philadelphia-New York. I love that. I love Dallas-Houston. I love Dallas-San Antonio. Yeah, Dallas-Clippers, fun rivalry, but you're right. It's not like you don't know people from there. Exactly. Yeah.

And, yeah, they're just so different too. They're very different. Dallas and Oklahoma City can't be any different. Yeah. And I guess the same could be said for Dallas-San Antonio. Yeah. In a way. And then Houston is just Houston.

Yeah. And that's always your kind of in-state rival. When was the last time you went to a Mavs game? We've done like sweet games. Oh, okay. Yeah. Yeah, I prefer that. your kind of in-state rival. When was the last time you went to a Mavs game? We've done like sweet games. Oh, okay. Yeah. Yeah, I prefer that. Yeah, I would imagine. We went to the...

Oh, that's right. We went with Cash the last game, right? Yeah, and then we also did Mavs Jazz playoff. The Western Conference Finals year. If you have a sweet, I'm a great sweet guest. Just telling people. Just put that out there.

Just saying. Because you bring something to the table? You know, I'll stand back there and hold court. We'll just do some stuff. I won't take your best seat. I'll just stand around. You won't eat all the meat? Yeah, you have the whole lunch spread for yourself.

I'll just eat some popcorn, maybe. Chet Holmgren might be inbred. That's my thought as I look at him. Just look at him. Okay. That's what I got from seeing him in person. How about this? He's definitely skinnier than you think.

It's insane. I didn't notice this there, but so they're doing like Hacka Lively at the end because I went back to watch the fourth quarter. I thought I said something to you about that at the time. I was like, this drives me insane. No, no, no. You talked about

Hacka Lively, but I didn't see the videos of Chet Holmgren chasing Lively around. You didn't see that? No. It's hard. I wasn't noting it while I'm there. Okay. It's hard to see live.

I knew they kept hacking him, but I didn't see that that was the only guy they were going to foul. And just having him sprinting away from Chet Holmgren to running around the... Two guys who are seven feet tall playing tag. It's so awesome. Just running around the baseline and around the stanchion, trying to tag each other.

Early in the third, Jake says, because P.J. Washington had 27 points, and Jake says to me, I think he's got his career high. I said, well, game two he had 29. I forgot about that. So that was a bad point. It was. But then we both agreed. Well, he'll get his career high. Because he had 27 points

and I think he was four minutes gone in the third. Yeah. And he finished with 27 points. Because Kyrie knows when it's Kyrie time for sure. It's crazy. It's crazy.

Like we talked about it the other day whenever he had the 28 in the second half. I don't know. And I think it was maybe Brad Townsend who took a break

from retweeting 18-year-old Mavs female fans to write a column. As we're walking in, Jake would be like, Brad would retweet her. Brad would retweet her. 18-year-old Mavs female fans to write a column. As we're walking in, Jake would be like, Brad would retweet her.

Brad would retweet her. I think it was him that wrote the column of, they're going to need like a ballistic Kyrie Knight. I don't know that they can keep getting by with Luka being this banged up. Like they need a, you know what, bud, F it. Take 25 shots. We need a 40-point Kyrie night at some point to close this thing out, whether it's tonight, whether it's Wednesday, whether it goes to game seven.

They're going to need a bonkers Kyrie night. But he's got a good sense about when he... And I'm not just saying that because I wrote a column saying that they definitely needed that to get that tonight. I think he's got a good sense about when he needs to step up. Because, you know, they won. He had, what, 11 points? Yeah.

It still feels like he has a huge impact on the game as far as, like as pace and energy, but I don't know that they can get away with another sub-20 Kyrie Knight, or even 20 or 22. I was asking you about the, remember, I said, who was the failed free agent center we got last year? JaVale McGee. And year? JaVale McGee. And it was JaVale McGee.

I was only asking that because I feel like Gafford is exactly what they wanted JaVale McGee to be. For sure. And they all almost have similar looks as far as the, don't they wear like a headband and just kind of tall and mopey like that? Let him finish. I'm not saying they're both black. There are many black people on the team that do not look...

Don't you feel like just overall from afar, it's like they seem like kind of the same guy. But JaVale McGee just was a freaking anchor. He just didn't know where to be. He didn't know where to go. I feel like they're both... Gafford at least has a decent feel. He just didn't know where to be. He didn't know where to go. I feel like they're both... Gafford at least has a decent feel. Unique.

Oh, here's this guy. Are you going to play this game? No, there is something to what you're saying. This is new Jake. I know, yeah. There is something to what you're saying of they also have the same gangliness. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I don't know, just... Yeah, for sure. Like I said, from afar, they look like similar profiles. And I don't know how old Daniel Gafford is. He can't be that much younger than JaVale McGee, but JaVale McGee's been in the league for like 15 years. Yeah. There's a lot of wear and tear on that body.

Also, like – Gafford's 25. Okay. I was going to say, I thought Gafford was closer to 30, and McGee's probably 34. 36. But also, like, a lot of times it seemed like JaVale

McGee didn't give a shit. Like, at all. And Gafford has, like, flex at the crowd. That's what's so cool about him and PJ. And Derek Jones Jr. for that matter yeah

they get people fired up it's really insane and you know the other one I brought up to you after you you asked about JaVale McGee

I was like yeah well they also had another failed one Christian Wood right who also kind of seemed like he didn't give a shit

yeah and I'm not like half the time did he even play in the playoffs no no that's sad I really liked Christian Wood It seemed like he didn't give a shit. Yeah, and I'm not... Like half the time. Did he even play in the playoffs? No. No. That's sad.

I really liked Christian Wood. I had very high hopes for him. I thought he was a good dude, too, when we had him on. He was a good guest. Wasn't he entertaining? He was. But, yeah. Kind of seemed like he didn't care.

Yeah, no. It seems that maybe he is that guy that I didn't believe he was that can be like you get on a really bad team, you'll score 20 a night, you'll have seven rebounds a night, you'll make 30 million or whatever, 20 million minimum. Then you go to a team where they ask you to do stuff. Yeah, because somebody scores points. Even if you're like the worst NBA team in history, you would score 80 points a game.

Somebody's going to get you 20. Somebody's going to score the points. He could be that guy on... 18-win Rockets team. Yeah, yeah. I think it's been cool. And it was. Seeing specifically Gafford and Washington

grow into learning what playoff basketball is. Okay. You said something about that, too. Maybe it was around that screaming discussion that we had to have because it's so loud in there. But just that those guys also came from pretty bad situations. And game one against the Clippers, I don't think they were ready.

Specifically Gafford. Because he got pushed around a lot. Zubats absolutely had his way with it. So I don't think he was ready. Now, he did get banged up, but I think they both realized what this is all about. Which is cool to see. Yeah.

And then you got the Flex meme. Now they're really ready for what Saturday's game was. Yes. This real physical brawl type thing. Yeah. And they're like, yeah, okay, bring it on. And how about the Mavs? Don't you feel like they're thought of as a tough team right now?

Because Luka's certainly tough. He's big. He's hard to push around. And then you look at little SGA, you're like, you know? That's not tough. No, and Jake and I have talked about this a lot. I think the Mavs are a hard team to play because

you're going to have to fight through a screen every single possession. And you're going to get banged up. Those elevators are opening and closing on both sides of the floor constantly. And those are not easy screens. It's probably the toughest Mavs team that I can recall since the 06 era, maybe. You're not going championship year?

Even with Karan Butler when he was playing? Boy, he played what, four games? Tough Juice barely played that year. But Dirk has always said that. They had Tyson, they had Deshaun, they had your fill-in parts like Brian Cardinal. But Dirk has said how important Karan Butler was for the team when he played the little bit he did.

I'm just saying there's really not a player on the Mavs that gets minutes right did. I'm just saying, like, there's really not, like, a player on the Mavs that gets minutes right now that I'm not, like, that guy's pretty sturdy. Tim, maybe, but he's barely playing. See, Tim's dad was in the news. Always. Yeah. He saw he hadn't been in the news for the last five minutes,

so he needed to hop in. I think he said Tim was – or Timmy! Is that a South Park thing? Why do they do that? In the arena, they just yell Timmy. Yeah, no, it's one of the last vestiges of not being canceled. What? Well, I mean, just the fact that they're playing the Timmy drop.

Well, no, I thought it's just the PA guy yelling Timmy. I know, but... Is it a South Park thing? Of course it is. Yeah, it's the physically disabled kid. No, I know who Timmy is on South Park. But he wouldn't be saying it like that. But I'm saying, yeah, is he doing that because he watches South Park?

Yes. No, because he heard it in South Park. Okay. But, yes. Okay, I didn't know. I didn't know if people called him Timmy. They don't call him Timmy. I can tell you that.

I don't know. Oh, he called him the best shooter on the Mavs. Hmm. You got to get your best shooter more looks. Sure. He had a good game in game two. He did. And to Kidd's credit, they didn't freak out and play him like 31 minutes because he had a decent game in game two.

Yes, Kidd does deserve some credit. Kidd recognized very quickly a mismatch when he put in Timmy for Lively, but then it was the same time Holmgren checked in. Yeah. And I think even you remarked at that point, like, whoa. Who's going to guard him? He pretty much reversed his decision in five seconds once

he noted that. Yeah. And who knows, maybe... He heard me. Well, maybe, you know... I don't know. Can't you see Holmgren is checking in? I don't know why you make that move. Normal flow of the rotation, yeah. But he did figure that out. I mean, there was another time earlier in the game flow of the rotation, yeah. But he did figure that out.

I mean, there was another time earlier in the game when it was like a free throw, and Luka, it was like the second free throw, and Luka sees, I don't know if it was home run or somebody behind him, you know, as far as a cherry picker type thing, and then he had Lively and Gafford down on the block, and Luka's like, wait, no, no, no. I need you to get back there because I'm going to make this free throw.

There are times when you watch them in person where it feels like Luka's coaching the team. Luka was directing everybody on what to do, and Kidd is just standing there, arms crossed, just kind of like watching Luka. Not nodding, like I agree with that move. He's just watching Luka. Yeah.

And then, of course, so then he puts Kyrie down on the block instead of Gafford because he's got to get back there to cover. Luka missed the free throw. Kyrie couldn't get the rebound, and they tapped it in. Or excuse me, and then grabbed the rebound. Grabbed the rebound, yeah. So it didn't work out because then I said, well, if he'd kept Gafford there, he would have got that rebound.

I have some stuff to mention that's not part of the game or that might be part of the game but not like what we've been talking about. One is I took this picture. This is a picture of people taking pictures of the Mavs horse mascot thingy, the champ. It's champ. Champ. Yeah.

So they have, I can't keep track of their masks. They had Mazman. He still exists. He's just in some sort of a bastardized Iron Man form now. Yeah, his skin used to be made of basketball, which was cool.

Was it? Interesting. Yeah, I liked it. I know you thought it was weird, but... It's extremely weird. Why would his skin be made of basketball? Because he's a basketball man.

He had sex with a basketball. That is actually what happened. Right. Or got caught in a... Kind of like the fly. Got caught in something that fused... That's a great reference. It fused the DNA of the basketball and of Mavs man.

He was just this guy named Steve, and then he became Mavs man. Anyway. But he still needs a trampoline to dunk. This mascot, this... Well, I think what you were going to say is that we also had the Mavrello experience. What? No. Not us. experience what no not us but i just mean as far as like we go through the yeah the the litany of

things that they've used to brand the team curiously they had an eastern european whose backstory was that he was buried underneath uh reunion arena and somehow was like an i don't know like an online nft basketball with a gold tooth? I don't know. Yeah, they kind of just never ended that story. They didn't really even start the story. I suppose they did start it, but I don't know that they had a middle. Yeah, did they have an end in mind when they first started?

Did they just think this is going to really catch on and everybody's going to love Mavrelo? We'll figure it out afterward. We'll get all the Mavrello merch sold and we'll have a separate, you know, Mavrello store. Right, yeah. The hangar, Mavrello store. Yeah, and then Champ is, Champ stands the test of time. So Champ is, yeah, this horse, blue horse mascot thing that walks around.

And then people, this isn't just, I understand if kids or you have a kid, like, oh, hey, go get a picture with the mascot. But these are adults. These are 40-year-old people just holding up their phone. They can't take enough pictures of Champ to go home and set. What are you doing? I've never thought about this before, but watching how upset Dan was...

There was like 30 phones out. Like, oh, I got to get a picture of this thing. Pictures of Champ. I was like, yeah, you know, I would not do that. I would not take a picture of Champ, but I've never been so put off by it. But you're right. It's extremely weird.

Outside the arena. It's adults without kids. Outside the arena on the way in, even for the playoffs, I think they've really upped their game since I've been to a playoff game. It's pretty sweet. They got the blue carpet. Especially for a weekend game. They got the blue carpet out there.

Yeah, and it was afternoon. So then they have these photo things set up like you have at a wedding or at a graduation or whatever. So it's got the Mavs background, and you can go stand there, but they've got their professional camera all set up. And certainly, I'm sure, for the low, low price of $19.99 or whatever, you can get your picture made. And yeah, you can get home, and they get your get your little your picture made and yeah when you can get home and they'll mail it to you or whatever just like pictures with Santa are now same exact thing right sure and you can't go

stand in front of that thing and take a picture with your phone no you do not allow you to do that you cannot the dance The dance team sucks. Yeah. What do you want? You want more skin? I think we need more. We just need the ladies or more skin or something.

I always say I don't need my sex and sports mixing. How about just not at all? Or not at all. It's just, I don't know. I think I would be okay with not at all? Or not at all. It's just, I don't know. I think I would be okay with not at all. I don't know what they would do with that void. Paintball? I swear when I, I remember like the 90s sports talk.

It was old guys on the radio lamenting that, you know, it used to be when you could go to an arena and they took a timeout, you can kind of just talk about the game and what you've seen, and now I'm that guy. Yeah. I remember thinking, yeah, whatever, old man. I love these tunes. Yeah, because, you know, I want to talk to my friend here,

and I did have to do like the full mouth cover and yell into his ear, even whenever there was no play. Speaking, I love these tunes. And I went back and watched this play, the Luka jump ball with a minute and a half left or so. That was not a foul. I thought in the arena, I thought Luka just got nailed. But they were both going for the ball, right?

Well, they called a jump ball. They called a jump ball, but I thought at first because who was it? Was it Dort? Of course. Okay, but I thought he slammed him to the ground, but it wasn't. They were both looking at the ball, going for the ball, so that was legit. But,

maybe when young Dan thought this was really cool that they played jump by Van Halen when they did a jump ball. I didn't realize they'd still do it 30 years later or 40 or however many years. He was really bothered by this. Gotta play the hits. Can we not come up with a new bit? He brought it up a couple times.

How about the Mavs intros with Eminence Front? That feels like also a... That feels 2011. That just feels like the Dirk era. It does feel Dirk. But you can't move on from Eminence Front. Come on, man. It is really cool.

It is really old, though. It just feels Dirk to me. I'm with you. It does feel Dirk, but that's why I want it to be used for Luka. Yeah. What do you want, Gangnam style? Talk me into that. I'll probably lose that battle.

We were just talking, screaming to each other about the – do you remember the winner out of COVID? Yeah, yeah. Coaches not having to wear suits anymore. Yeah, that's right. I don't totally understand it, but – Right. Why did they say during COVID, you know what i can't wear a suit yeah

because we're in the bubble virus sticks to ties it didn't make any sense like so they go to the bubble they're like all right well you can wear you know uh tracksuit and then they left the bubble and left Disney World, and they're like, well, still wear it. What if they kept doing that? Wouldn't that be great? I just marvel at the difference between the NHL and the NBA. Oh, my gosh. Whether it's the plane, the coach.

Player empowerment. Yeah. Player empowerment can make you wear whatever you want. They tried. Early 2000s, they tried to implement a dress code in the NBA for travel. I recall that it was... It went very poorly. Yeah, and it was like around the Allen Iverson time.

Oh, yeah, because all these tattoos and everything. Yeah. And it's funny, too, because as we've stated many times, when you get on that stars plane they strip the first thing they do they all take their suits off and they just yeah throw them to the side and put on their sweatsuits yeah or just wear boxers yeah some of them literally will just wear boxers in a shirt yes they're undershirt and boxers and play cards yeah it's like when i go home like the first thing i do is I take off these business jeans.

Oh, I wore my playoff jeans. You have playoff jeans. Oh yeah. You're one and oh in them. Yep. I'm not washing them. You shouldn't,

you shouldn't. Until the, until we take the, the Larry O'Brien. Just watching the Jumbotron. It's, it goes along with, you know, people go nuts for the t-shirts

from the t-shirt canon. Like, if the Jumbotron catches you, you then all of a sudden have to be, yeah, oh, yeah. Showing your shirt, yeah. Okay, I know, you're wearing a Mavs shirt. Well, they're a Mavs fan. But they're like,

just can't believe it. They lose their effing mind. They cannot believe that they've just made the Jumbotron, and they're going to tell everybody they know about that for the next two weeks. I thought at the game

when I went with Jake, I thought if they could somehow sell the feed, I bet people would buy it if they made it. Oh my gosh. That's like a Six Flags bit. Yeah. After a certain ride, right? 15 bucks,

20 bucks, you want the feed from the Jumbotron if you made it, here. Yeah. I bet they could make some money doing that. Shucks. That's a great idea. That is a great idea. People lost it over the t-shirt cannon, but also, did you get the things parachuted down? Like the hat from the roof or something?

No, but I love parachute bits. The couple next to us, We didn't have one the other day. She was getting ready to trounce me over a Mavs hat

that was parachuting down from above. Yeah. You ever see the bit when they have, they have the little blimps that fly around? Yeah,

I like that too. Coupons and stuff? Yeah. Definitely got a crowd pretty fired up for potential free chicken. Ooh, did you have a missed free throw? Well, they were hacking Derek Lively at the end of the game. So Dan's question, I think, was... Oh, if the home player misses?

Yeah, because he did miss too. He missed too, and I'm like, did we get chicken for that? Nope. Jake's like, no. Has to be the road team. Yeah. Which he did miss two. He missed two, and I'm like, do we get chicken for that? Nope. Jake's like, no. Has to be the road team. Yeah. Which seems like it sucks. And then maybe we need to do a reports on this, a breakdown.

But the Stars have too many banners. Oh, no. They had 20 banners. You counted. Oh, yeah. The Mavs have 10. There are a couple guys. Video Man may know who they are, but there are a couple guys. And I grew up a pretty big Stars fan that I don't know who they are.

I told you Bill Masterton. Masterton was the one. Masterston? Because he died, right? He died. He's the only on-ice fatality in NHL history. Oh. That's why he got his number retired.

Neil Broughton. For sure, though. But Neil Broughton checks out. Neil Broughton, all-time star is great before Madonna. Yeah. Masterston, I understand that one. I don't agree with it. Are you sure?

What? I mean, you understand it. Okay. I just said I don't agree with it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Bobby Phil's got his number retired by Charlotte because he died in a street race. Like if I shoot Blake with a gun right now. Right.

We retire that headset. Do we have to mention him in the open every day? So Masterton was a North Star? So that made the trip down? Well, a lot of them did. Yeah, Neil Broughton. Neil Broughton was. He never played for Dallas Stars. One year maybe? Did he? Should they be in the Dallas down? Well, a lot of them did. Yeah, Neil Broughton. Neil Broughton was... He never played for Dallas Stars.

One year, maybe? Did he? Should they be in the Dallas Arena? Did he? I think so. Told you I was a Stars fan. Well, no, they... Most teams, history travels with them.

Johnny Unitas is probably a Colts, right? An Indianapolis Colts retired number or whatever. Well, there was your reason for not putting him on. Who was the third guy? Do you have that list? Because I took a picture of it. But it annoyed me. There is a third guy that I'm like, I don't know who that is either.

It is Goldsworthy. Number eight. Goldsworthy of the Dallas Stars. And they say there's no way to find out. So I think that'll remain a mystery. But, yeah. Old Bill Goldsworthy. What did he do?

Was he just, like, good? Yeah, it doesn't look like it's anything that impressive, other than playing a butt-ton of games. He wasn't just a good scrappy white guy like Brad Davis. No, I mean, he was on the team for a decade. I guess hockey has too many Brad Davises. Right.

If you start picking off the hockey Brad Davises, there's going to be no jerseys up there. Yeah. Anyway, great, great time. There's a world where you kind of look like this guy. That's kind of offensive, but I will. Two balding men. I once tried to grow my hair out.

It looks like he really did not. Stuck with it. Yeah, he did not want to go for it. So anyway, great night. Thanks for inviting me. It was really fun. Yeah, man. Thanks for turning him down because I know I didn't get the first invite. That's the way it goes.

Kid birthday party. I can't wait for tonight, man. But I'll tell you what. If you want me to go to a game with you, number one, if you tell me it's a suite, I'm in. Number two, if you say it's Saturday afternoon, I'm quadruple in. Home by 6.30 or something? Oh, 6, I bet.

Around there. Yeah. And then we did have Jake, did have to do babysitting that night because if he's going to party during the day, wife gets to party at night. Yeah. But that also, you know,

got me out of any other obligations. If, you know, hey, you want to go hang out? We're getting invites from other people. I want to. But Jake. This guy and his kids. I love the fact that That's why you rode with him. That's the reason I'm friends with him.

Yeah, now my kids are too old to use this excuse anymore. Sure. So I now have my surrogate kids who I'm teaching to swear. Alright. So I now have my surrogate kids who I'm teaching to swear. All right. Shall we break? Sure.

Tim Hardaway, last question before we let you go. How do you deal with a gay teammate? Oh, first of all, I wouldn't want him on my team. And second of all, if he was on my team, I would, you know, really distance myself from him because I don't think that's right. And, you know, I don't think that, you know, he should be in a locker room while we're in a locker room. And it's just a whole lot of other things. So I wouldn't even be a part of that.

But, you know, stuff like that going on, and there's a lot of other people out here like that that's still in the closet and don't want to come out the closet, but, you know, I just leave that alone. You know that what you're saying there, though, Timmy, is flatly homophobic, right? It's just flat. It's bigotry. Well, you know, I hate gay people, So, you know, I let it be known. I don't like gay people. I don't like to be around gay people. I don't, you know, I'm homophobic.

I don't like it. It shouldn't be in the world for that or in the United States for it. So, yeah, I don't like it. You're listening to The Dumb Zone. The mechanics of investing are actually easy, but it comes down to mindset. Great investors are open-minded and understand things before other people. So I know this might feel polarizing, but I encourage you to keep an open mind right now. I see Bitcoin as a very misunderstood asset class.

No puppet. The more I thought about that guy over the past couple days, the more I started to feel bad for him. Boy, he's selling lots of bracelets, man. You're probably right. You're probably right about that, but... And he probably got paid pretty well to do that. That I don't know about. What do you think?

I don't know how that works. I bet that's... He had to get paid to do that. I bet not. I wonder. Why don't you book him? Okay. Oh.

Okay. Don't you have to book the car sales guy anyways? Yeah, I got to book a lot of people. Oh, that's right. Is that Louisiana? Yeah. Got a lot of feedback on that, too. That's all Blake and I were texting about this weekend.

That guy's great. All right, so what do you want to do? You want to do Beef Monday? I want to play this video real quick. Oh, you got a video? What video? Are we playing it on our video, or you're just playing something so you can look at it?

Yeah, I want to know who I date, who I go with. Nope, but I think you think you're black. Hey, we got a 25 SST Ram truck. Come holla. We should book that guy. Y'all want to know who I date? No, but I think you think you're black. Yeah, so last week I made some

statements that I clearly need to walk back, which is the idea that this entire rap beef situation would not get somebody physically harmed. Oh. Well, there have now been three police-involved incidents at the home of one Aubrey Drake Graham. Hmm. Aubrey Drake Graham. Hmm. And he has not ever been shy about putting out there where he lives.

Like going so far as to even film like a music video inside of his home. And he calls it the embassy. And he puts the address out there. Which I don't know if that's a good idea or not. I mean, I suppose if you have proper security, then you're going to be fine until those security get hunted down. which I don't know if that's a good idea or not. I mean, I suppose if you have proper security, then you're going to be fine until those security get hunted down.

Did that happen? That has been happening. Is this by, like, fans of Kendrick Lamar or just – I guess so. You know, I don't think it's any sort of, like – I guess that's what I meant is that, like, whenever we had the East Coast, West Coast thing in the 90s, it would be their crews, right? Exactly.

Like it was a direct deployment of somebody's people. And I don't think that's what's happening here. But they've had three intruders attempt to get into the inside of his home. Yeah, because now you get people with a hammer trying to get Nancy Pelosi's husband or whatever. Yeah, you get your people all worked up on the social. Exactly. And that's what's going on here.

And so, like, in a matter of one week, there have been three. Hey, so you say, when you talk about Drake... One of the security guards got shot, by the way. I just want to make sure we're clear that there was at least one person who also got shot. Okay. Well, that's good then, right? I mean, you wanted an old-fashioned rap beef. Here we go.

When you say stuff about Drake and it was well-known, you know, he's a well-known this or that, did Atlanta do like a spoof on him? did Atlanta do like a spoof on him? Do you remember when they had like a party at some rich rapper's house? I should probably have more info before I bring this to the table. I can't help you. I'll follow up on this tomorrow. Write that down, Blake.

I haven't seen the third season. Make me follow up. Oh, maybe that's it. Maybe I just spoiled the whole season for you. So anyways, it definitely picked up over the last handful of days. Okay. And probably the one that really, really, really cut is this song called Not Like Us. And I'm praying this is clean. I did not edit it myself.

But what does it really matter anymore, right? Yeah, yeah. He put it out. It's on Spotify, right? And I think the thing about this song... Or Apple Music. The thing about this song is this is a very West Coast sounding song.

Now, I know that that doesn't really mean a whole lot to you. But this feels like the first one that kinder has put out it sounds like you know an old school like uh dre what warren g like it's it's a west coast song and i feel like that's an intentional thing of being like you are not one of us you live in la but you are not one of us. You live in LA, but you're not one of us. Okay. Because Drake has like this mansion in LA. And what's it called again? Not Like Us.

Not Like Us. Okay. Oh, so also in Kendrick's previous song, he notably confused Joel Osteen with Haley Joel Osment. Oh, really? Joel Osteen is like a... Televangelist in Houston. Okay. Big time megachurch pastor. Haley Joel Osment got AIDS on Walker.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. He sees dead people. So this is a nod to that, the intro. Psst uh he sees dead people so this is a a nod to that the intro i see dead people so wait he did it wrong on perp or he did it drake drake didn't do it wrong no kendrick did it wrong now but he's i i want to get he's being self-deprecating saying hey because i'm such a homer i want to give him the 0.% benefit of the doubt that he actually just said, Haley Joel Osteen, I see dead people, because it made sense to him.

Probably he just fucked it up. Okay. So now he's being self-deprecating by bringing it up at the start of this song. Okay. Because everybody heard this six-and-a-half-minute song he did, and they're like, this is great, but... Okay, no, I like the explanation,

because I heard that and didn't understand why i see dead people so that's just uh dj mustard the the guy who produced the song that's like the one line here that means nothing. So there's a part about that too. And I think we touched on this a little bit last week. Drake being a pop star, he's like an industry darling. Kendrick doesn't really like to play along. He's a weirdo. Okay.

Probably very difficult for the people who run the record companies. Drake. Industry darling. Exactly. You can hate me for Marlindy, mama. How many ops you really got? I mean, there's too many options. I'm finna pass on this body. I'm John Stockton.

All right, so John Stockton. That is a Karl Malone reference because a huge portion of what Kendrick is angling for here is the idea that Drake is a pedophile. Okay. That he hits on Millie Bobby Brown or that he hits on Billie Eilish or that he's doing whatever it was that Diddy was doing also. So this is what people say anyway.

Yeah. Behind the scenes, he's just now saying it. Yeah, and so the John Stockton reference is like, I'm John Stockton, meaning you are Carmelone. And they've been pictured together since Drake has deleted the picture from his Instagram. With who? With Bobby Brown. With Carl Malone.

With Carl Malone, that's right. Oh. Carl Malone did post, or Drake did post a picture with Carl Malone, and everyone was like, how did you not understand this? Stockton. Beat your... and have the Bible of God watching. Sometimes you gotta pop out and show... Certified Boogie Man. I'm the one that up to score with him. Walking down the whole time, I know he got some...

on him. Pole on him. Extort. Bully the floor on him. Say, Drake, I hear you like I'm young. You better not ever go to cell block one. To any...

that talk to him and they in love, just make sure you hide your little sister from him. I mean, that's all pretty... You don't need much dissect explanation. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Don't go to cell block one if you're in love with him. Hide your sister from him. Yeah.

Chubbs is Drake's bodyguard, hammy downs and chubbs is uh drake's bodyguard who has also been rumored to be a uh pedophile so he gets fan of the young get your hand me down yeah the only one that get your hammy downs and party at the party playing with his nose now and baka got a weird case why is he around another member of drake's's crew who apparently is facing some allegations. Why is he around? Well, that's pretty out there. Certified pedophiles, I think. What's he mean by that?

Yeah, I don't know. Let's dig into this. That's brilliant. He's singing in A minor. Oh, really? Yeah. But also A minor. Of course.

There's a lot going on. It's wonderful. Yeah. Trying to strike a chord.. But also A minor. Of course. There's a lot going on. It's wonderful. Yeah. Trying to strike a chord. It's probably A minor. And then switch your vocal intonation to A minor. So this is the latest? Yeah, I don't know that you're going to get anything back after this.

Wait, who was the first again? Well, you'd have to go back like a really long time. You know, I was thinking about this the other day. I actually saw, the first time I saw Kendrick Lamar live, he was opening for Drake. This was probably 2011. It was at UTA. And Drake was already like a huge deal pop star and Kendrick was you know a lesser known and I think he might have had 12 to 15 minutes but I was only there to see him

because I was obsessed with him already so it's not like they haven't had some sort of backstory together from a positive standpoint. But I do think it's that, you know, over the last however many is five to 10 years, people have just been like, man, Drake is a phony. And, you know, he does fake accents. Like I was telling you the other day, it's not that people are like, oh, they don't call him white boy because he's mixed. They call him white boy because he acts white. Okay. I realize that's a weird thing for me to say.

But he doesn't ever like speak up about cultural issues or he doesn't ever speak up about, you know, racial issues. Whereas like Kendrick lives on that. Whereas BLM stuff, BLM stuff, or, you know, Drake was not a part of, nah, I mean, he might do like the, if it would sell performative fist raise or something, but Kendrick is out there. So I think that's a big part of it too, is that people just look at him as kind of you know a cultural culture vulture and that he just like will pick up on whatever thing that is cool with like youth black culture at that moment and then that's what he makes his thing commercially so if you ask me like how did it it start, I would say the seeds of it are basically everyone has been thinking this about this person for a per...

But, I mean, who put out the first song? The first song was Kendrick on a future record. Okay. So, that's what... Yeah, we were talking about that last week. Yes. But it was... Because my advice would have been...

It goes back from way before that. Don't do a response. Don't apologize. Don't respond. You're on top of the world. You have a billion dollars. I'm doing the don't apologize for something you said during a broadcast thing, and then everybody just moves on.

Yeah. Like you always say, yeah. But like we said, Drake had won a couple of these before, so he was feeling pretty good about himself. Okay. But he picked the wrong giant to go against okay this was just yeah an impenetrable force let me see if i can who will go at you cue this up because like a day before that he put one out called meet the grams kendrick did

dead beat that should never say okay yeah behavior sitting in the club with sugar daddies for Okay, yeah. This is his verse to Drake's child. Okay. Which Drake did not acknowledge until somebody made him in another song, Pusha T. Hope later. I never want to hear you chasing me. Cousin's felt behavior. Sitting in the club with sugar daddies for validation. You need to know that love is eternity and trumps all pain.

I tell you who your father is. Just play this song when it rains. Yes, he's a hit maker, songwriter, superstar, right? And a dead beat that should never say more life. Meet the Grams. Just calling him a dead beat. What's the Grams? His last name.

His last name. Oh. So now we got our last one here is to Aubrey Drake. Never say more life. Meet the Grams. a good exhibition within the game but you up the moment you called out my family's name why you had to stoop so low to discredit some decent people guess integrity is lost when the metaphors doesn't reach you and i like to understand because your house was never for a home 37 but you showing up as a seven-year-old you got gambling problems drinking problems spending problems bad with

money how soliciting women problems therapy's a lovely start i mean he just basically is like like i said the other day like you're a drunk you gamble too much you're soliciting escorts so in drake's response to him he called out kendrick's family yeah it just was like hey you beat i think i heard you beat your wife. And I don't even know if that's true. Some people have said that they actually lied and told Drake's camp that for money. But you showing up as a seven-year-old. You got gambling problems, drinking problems, spending problems, bad with money. How soliciting women problems. Therapy's a lovely start, but I suggest some ayahuasca.

Strip the ego from the bottom. It's a suggestion. Ayahuasca? Yeah. I'm gonna empathize with you, cause I know that you ain't been through nothing. Crave entitlement, but wanna be liked so bad that it's puzzling. No dominance. Let's recap

moments when you didn't fit in. No secret handshakes with your friend. No culture cachet to binge. Just disrespecting your mother. Identities on the fence Don't know which family will love you The skin that you living in Is compromised and personas Can't channel your masculine

Even when standing next to a woman You a body shamer You go hide them baby mamas, ain't ya? You embarrassed of them That's not right, that ain't how mama raised us Take that mask off I wanna see what's under them achievements Why believe you?

You never gave us nothing to believe in. Cause you lied about religious views. You lied about your surgery. You lied about your accent and your past tense. All is perjury. You lied about your ghost writers. You lied about your crew members. They all, you lied on them.

I know they all got you in them. You lied about your son. You lied about your daughter. Huh? You lied about them other kids that's out there hoping that you come. You lied about the only artist that can offer you some help. Damn. That's about it. He's like, hey, you brought up one thing for me. Here's 25 for you.

Yeah. Yeah. You lied about your son. You lied about your daughter. You lied about your religious. For his sales, right? Probably. It's probably great for both their sales.

You think, Drake? Kendrick is not doing this to make money. Like we had mentioned. No, I don't think so either. He released these on Twitter. He does not. This is not a money-making mission. Oh, it's not like you've got to go to Spotify.

Oh, no, no, no, no, no. You can a couple days later, but I mean, they don't come out there first. He doesn't operate like that. He's, again, he's a real crazy. And someone you don't

want to mess with. Exactly. Somebody's like, hey, I heard a rumor that you might have slapped your wife, and he's like, yeah, you're a gambling

degenerate who's hiding a son, hiding a wife. Oh, by the way, pedophile. Yeah, also, I think your entire team should be – Let's go do a whole song about that now. Your entire team is probably going to be raided by the government because you're a pedophile. It's just – I don't know.

It's a very interesting study in just how different types of humans react to different types of situations. And he's delivering this in a good song with rhymes. I mean, it's— And, like, I don't like Drake's music, but Drake's responses were good. It was just that you would listen to him, and you'd be like, okay, I wonder what's next. And then you would listen to the Kinder Corner, and you're like, holy shit.

I need a break. Yeah, you've got to sit down. Like, this is not okay. That's great, man. Yeah. See, that's good clean family fun right there. There it is. That's right.

From a comedy podcast. Uh, yes. Let's do a quick bout of this, and then we'll do the news. Hey, everybody. It's time to answer some of today's viewer mail. Just because I do have... I'll do the bulk of viewer mail tomorrow, but I have one non-birthday

that I have to read you guys today. Subject line. To Dan McDowell of the Dumb Zone. Sounds fake. Dear Dan, thank you for your request to attend the Arlington press conference on May 16th

about the upcoming Paul versus Tyson fight card on July 20th in Texas. We are sorry to say that after reviewing the media applications for this event and the available facilities for journalists, we are unable to accommodate your requests.

I will not be able to provide you with a credential. Yeah. I thought about this this morning whenever we were doing a Business Monday call and somebody who probably has like stocks Yeah. I thought about this this morning whenever we were doing a Business Monday call. And somebody who probably has like stocks had to say the name of our show. Yeah, somebody was the reason we were on this call is because somebody else that we know was pitching us like, hey, I think they'd be able to draw some people out. They're going to open up an apartment complex in Salina. You want to come do a remote, maybe a live show, something.

So, yeah, we had the guy on that kind of knew who we were, but then he had to pitch us to his higher-ups. He's like, yeah, well, these are the – I mean, they had a radio show in Dallas for many years. I've been listening to them forever. They're really good. We're still humming. Now they're doing a podcast.

It's called... Dan and Jake. The Dumb Zone. Yeah. And then you could audibly... I mean, audibly gasps and like... These are big money people that... Dan and I were not in the same room

and I could feel both of us just sink. Like they want to invest... Gosh, dang it. Anyway, they say, okay, so we can't give you a credential. Right. But... However, the event is open

to the public first-come, first-served basis at Texas Live. Or you could watch us on our YouTube channel or Netflix's YouTube. It's literally just saying we're not going to issue a restraining order. Right. You're allowed to go see us and go to a bar.

So we're allowed to do what everyone does? Yeah. Fantastic. Very excited about that. Yeah, I'm allowed to watch it on YouTube. It's not geofenced? Oh, okay. Cool, yeah.

That sucks. Yeah. it's not geofenced oh okay cool yeah that sucks yeah but we will be doing the live stream on our YouTube page and I'll tell you what although I can't invite all the listeners to the den we will invite a few

are you going to permit them to watch I will permit everyone to Although I can't invite all the listeners to the den, we will invite a few. Are you going to permit them to watch? I will permit everyone to go there or even Twitch. Wow. If you want to be a loser. Multiple options. If it makes you feel better, I don't think it was going to start until 7 p.m., so it would have been a late night for you.

Yeah, we both would have been tuckered out. Yeah. That's why we're not changing our name. So we can keep getting shut out of these things. That's right. So Friday after I got home, I saw this email from Brent Crable. Crabes. Who said, I'm writing you from Columbia, so this is a Friday birthday.

Birthday shout out to Brian Jameson. It is his Lyndon B. Johnson birthday. Birthday shout out to Brian Jamison. It is his Lyndon B. Johnson birthday. So he's 635 years old. That's what I take out of that. Yep. Brian was the guy at the show from my place who had a vasectomy and did a two-hour power hour. Yeah, and I think, didn't that guy do that like the day before?

Yeah. Yeah, and I think, didn't that guy do that like the day before? Yeah. Yeah. His leaders are Jake's Vape and World Trade Center Building 7. Where's that vape? It's over there somewhere. Dear Uncle Hotmail, May 11th is my son Nox Higginbotham's Brooke Jacoby birthday. What are we doing?

Who is that? Baseball player? Brooke Jacoby was the third baseman on the Cleveland Indians when I was a young fan. And I believe he might have made the cover of Sports Illustrated one year when Joe Carter, Brooke Jacoby, and Pat Tabler

all had 30 home runs the year before. Unstoppable. And back at that, in Jacoby, and Pat Tabler all had 30 home runs the year before. Unstoppable. And back at that, in those days, you didn't have three guys with over 30 home runs in the same lineup. So, I mean, World Series, here we come. They were picked by Sports Illustrated to win the World Series that year. I believe they finished sixth in the American League East. Yeah, and one year after that, I think there was 17.

Brooke Jacoby was playing for something called the Chinoochie Dragons. Damn. In Japan. Anyway, he says, anyway, that's from Tim. So Knox, happy birthday to Knox, to whatever age Brooke Jacoby's number was. And a shout out for my son's birthday. His name is Matthew.

He finished his freshman year at Baylor. He's a great kid. It's his Barry Sanders birthday. Okay. More Dan, less Blake, always more Jake. Hell yeah. Here's an old picture of Jake and I at an Alamo Drafthouse viewing from Matt Geeman.

Could be Gaiman. I'm not sure which is better. Owner Wolverine Cycle Logistics. That sounds kind of badass. What it sounds like to me is like the manatees from South Park just fetched three balls and moved them to the other side of the... Wolverine Cycle Logistics. Like I said, I have a lot more good stuff.

But we will get to that tomorrow because we must move on. Here's Jay with the Dumb Zone News. Do you guys remember a few years ago when we had that situation where nobody knew what color

the dress was on the internet? Yeah. That was a pretty annoying time. Every now and again stuff pops up like this. Laurel.

Yanni. Yanni or Laurel. It was blue or green, right? It was blue or gold. I'm trying to pull the story back up here. I don't understand stuff like this. Was that during the Trump era or pre-Trump? Was it a simpler time?

I think it was during Trump, yeah. And then everybody started screaming about Trump and stuff? Oh, okay. It was just a fun thing to do. This is 2015, so... Okay. It was a simpler time. It might have been a simpler time.

Well, the person who posted that photo strangled their wife. Till death? Because you can do a little choking. It just sounds like a fun weekend to me. I don't think it was to death. All right. But it wasn't during Passion. No.

No, it wasn't. Okay, yeah, it's attempted murder. He didn't finish the job, as it were. But 38-year-old man pled guilty late last week to attacking his wife in their home. He's from Scotland. Now, here's the backstory. now here's the back story the wife defied her husband's request not to attend a job interview

on the mainland he is said to have texted her saying someone is going to die so she wanted to like they live on an island outside of Scotland she wanted to go to an interview job interview and he's like no way which I don't understand because I thought pretty much everybody wants their wife to maybe contribute a little bit.

Or get out of the house. Yeah. There are some old school guys though, right? No wife of mine. Trad. You want a trad wife? No wife of mine will ever work. Yeah.

Why don't you stop knowing the term trad? Why? Where'd you learn this? Don't you think it's awesome? Where'd you learn this? Internet. No. No?

Okay, maybe internet, but I want more on why you know the term trad wife. There's articles about trad wives. The Brunigs taught you this, didn't they? The Brunigs certainly talk about trad wives. Well, apparently that's what he wanted. Don't you think I need to know things? Yeah, but I'm always very interested in the genesis of it. Okay.

Is that fair? Yeah, but I mean, I have, you know, Twitter stuff. Things are out there. Okay. I still, you can still have Kendrick. I'm seeing this was on the today show seems like maybe dan heard it from his wife trad wife trad wife has been on the today show i'm just guessing i don't know that i've ever seen that on there that would be a little bit outside of there

it basically just means like you know your wife is gonna be as traditional as possible they're not gonna work they're not going to work. They're not going to look at another man. Yeah. The fake traditional that we think that 50s TV taught us that this is actually real. But like aggressively about it. Whereas I feel like the women in the 50s were probably like, I'd prefer this not be the case. Yeah.

But to be submissive. Right. To, you know, your husband is the leader be the case. Yeah. But to be submissive. Right. To, you know, your husband is the leader of the home, all that kind of stuff. Right. Sounds so good. He can strangle me. Yeah, yeah.

If I want a job. Yeah. But yes, I've never understood that. Even when I was, because when I was younger, it was probably more prevalent that, you know, the thought of no wife of mine will ever work. And I was like, what? Wait. Seems like that'd be great. You have more money?

Yeah. And you have something to do? But I guess the thought, too, is because I need her... I need that house clean. I need that dinner on the table. I need... You know, this thing that dinner on the table. I need this thing ain't going to suck itself. All that kind of stuff.

I think it's less those other parts. I think it's less those other parts and more I need you to definitely need me. You're dependent upon me. Full control over you. Lies with me alone.

So if you want a job, even though I know that we posted this viral photo together, I'm going to strangle you. It is kind of funny though, because I would not know about this story at all had they not posted that photo. People strangle their spouses all the time. Yeah, but now it's these people.

But now it's the bluer. They had a viral moment. Yeah. For the fifth straight year. What color did you

think it was? To me it looks blue. I feel like it was always blue. I never even. Yeah blue. I never even. I didn't get the

whole bit. No. My wife saw gold and it actually frustrated me. Because how could you see gold? I didn't get it. Yeah, that's what I was starting to say. Even with Yanni Laurel, it drove me insane. Laurel.

I think I always heard Laurel. Yeah. Yeah, me too. For the fifth straight... Well, you were right. Those were simpler times. That was our whole discussion for a day. Yeah.

Water cooler was... Now it's like all... A couple of boys want to storm the Capitol, and all of a sudden we got to... Now we're talking about Israel. I know. Yeah. The two most popular names for boys and girls in America, both repeated, or should I say

five-peated, Liam and Olivia. Mm-hmm. I have a nephew, Liam. Seen a lot of Liams. Wonder how that became so prevalent. Hey, hold on. Let's wonder why exactly you're seeing so many... I mean, like, is it your

son's friends, or... Why are you seeing so many Liams? Yesterday, I think we had 42 church dedications, and I bet we had three or four Liams. Okay. He got a church out. He had a church trapdoor on me. Yeah, that's a church force field had a church trap door on me

yeah that's a church force field if you would have just taken what I said at face value and not asked questions would be ok tried to run the pedophile play he hit me with the church zone nope thwarted my attack do you go to church

if your wife is working do you go without her yeah in fact that in a really really bad way makes me go more Do you go to church if your wife is working? Do you go without her? Yeah. In fact, that in a really, really bad way makes me go more because I need something to do with the kid. And so I'll go. He'll go to his little class and I'll go hang out with my friends and meet up later. With the chicks. Do you get all dressed up?

Yeah. I enjoy dressing up for church. Makes me feel good. Do you go to church every week? No. Why did you go this Sunday? Because my wife worked. And you just needed something to do. In a way. You need some cookies.

Do you get post-church cookies? That's what we used to get. No. We'll go eat. Like at the church? Yeah, at the church. Down in the basement they served cookies and stuff. No, but church helped me. Do you have something to tell us? I've suppressed a lot of it. You don't want to dive too deep in there.

My wife only got... I don't remember. I mean, I ate the cookie and then I woke up later. Did I put my underwear on backwards? Why am I so sore? No, my wife only got flowers because we got them at church. Nice.

And he did a little drawing for her. So she thought you got those things done. Whereas Jake's wife knew oh, this is certainly from the school. So it got the school logo on it. No, she just took the flower and thought it was nice and that's it. She didn't care where it came from. She knew it didn't come from me.

Okay, because you're not gift givers. No. You have to give her Valentine's stuff? No. I don't think I said this earlier, but that's one of the things that I was... I didn't defend myself well when these attacks came at me yesterday. defend myself well when these attacks came at me yesterday. But my thought was

like 75% of the time, I feel like I'm an awesome gift giver. And 25% of the time, I don't do anything. And I'm learning it may be better to just be like a 100% of the time average gift giver. Yeah, you set

the bar too high. Does that make sense? It makes great sense. Like, I do a lot. Yeah. And I feel like I go above and beyond. But then occasionally I'm just like, you know what, I was busy or this happened or that happened. I didn't think it was a big deal this time.

Had to go to the game with Dan. Had to go to the game with Dan. I mean, it's the playoffs. Right. Why would they put Mother's Day right in the NBA playoffs? And so then it's like those are the times to get remembered. Of course. Not the... Right. Why would they put Mother's Day right in the NBA play? And so then it's like those are the times to get remembered. Not the great times. Right.

What about the 12 times? Yeah. Anyways. Remember how we did the engagement? There was a bunch of kids named Liam and Olivia. Olivia, I don't know where that one comes from. Where are we on the top? Give me some top fivers.

Let's pull it up here. Jake has had a tough... Jacob. Well, it was, for a long time, the most popular male name. Oh, really? Yeah. Daniel's always, like, in the mix somewhere. I mean, top 50.

But what we've been doing, though, is trending... Which it always will be. You think? Yeah, Bible. Yeah. A lot of, Bible. Yeah. A lot of Noahs. Yeah. Noah number two.

Really? Oliver, Elijah, James, William, Benjamin, Lucas, Henry, and Theodore. Boy, James and William, huh? Test of time on those boys. Yeah. Probably so. For the girls following Olivia... Oliver, though.

No, that's... I got a lot of Olies. That feels 1920. Where? In your kid's school? There's one in my kid's school. At least have one. Really?

Oliver. Yep. Olipop. Nickname. Okay. Why do you know another kid's nickname? Because my kid says it.

Who did you see at school? I saw Holly Pop. I went to buy a nothing bundt cake yesterday in my haste to try to erase all of my failures. And I saw... How sad is that, too? They know that you're there for that. It's just awful. Like, why not go to Kroger?

Yeah. Oh, the employees? I did that, too. Yeah. Like, they all know. Yeah, they're laughing. Why are you here go to Kroger? Yeah. Oh, the employees? Well, I did that too. Yeah. They all know. Yeah, they're laughing. Why are you here at 4 o'clock? It's bad enough if you're there Saturday, let alone-

Day's half over. Not pretty. Currently Mother's Day. Not pretty. They have nothing left. Two of the meals of the day are done already. And I met, I ran into one of my daughter's classmates' mom. are done already. And I met,

I ran into one of my daughter's classmate's mom. And she was like, hey, are you Kristen's husband? And that felt good to me. Because, you know, until she realized you're there to buy a Mother's Day gift. At 4 o'clock on Mother's Day.

What was she there doing? I think it was a birthday cake. So she had an excuse. But my point is just, you know, running into somebody who doesn't say, like, I got to be honest with you, dude. You should have seen Dan and I at the game on Saturday. A lot of Dumb Zone fans out there. We're the most popular girl in class. on Saturday. There's a lot of Dumb Zone fans out there. So to have somebody say

We're the most popular girl in class. To have somebody say like hey I just thought of it because Like she only knew you through

your wife. Yeah. It's like oh. A lot of people knew me because of the Wong thing. Because I was with Jake. Yeah. Jake's popular.

Hey Jake! So this is a a wild story. There's a woman That wasn't porn was it? No. That feels Yeah. Jake's popular. Hey, Jake! So this is a wild story. That wasn't porn, was it? No. That feels like Luca's porn. So you were happy that she noticed you from being like a good dad at school, and you were currently buying the cake for your wife at a bad time?

I don't even know that it was really good dad. I think it was more just that I was a dad. I don't mind being known as good dad slash bad husband. If you had to pick. Yeah. Right? Like I'm related to them.

Yeah. I'm not related to her at all. And they have more time left. Yeah. You could have some impact. There's a woman in Justin, Texas. You're not getting

on any cover of a magazine for being a good husband. That's a good point. Yeah. See, I don't know if Justin has their own height.

Yeah, there's West. There's Justin Northwest who beat Argyle out of the playoffs two years ago. Blake, you can do this. Jags. Are they like the Texans?

I believe they're the Texans. All right. So this woman in Justin, her name is Samantha Cup. She runs a place called the Milky Rose Boutique. And she makes jewelry. Out of breast milk. Wow. Yeah, I don't have like a ton more info.

Yeah, how do you? She says all she needs is one ounce. To make? I think it's like a little, you know, she'll do like a little, you preserve the breast milk, then you make it into a powder. You mix it up with like a resin. We're at a stone place. He's stretching. He's going to do some Googling. What?

Isn't that what that whole show is about? I don't know what you're saying. Oh, his show? Yeah, he's doing the... Really? Samantha Cup. And also, it's not her breast milk. Oh.

I thought it was Amanda Cup. There's a really hot Amanda Cup on here. Samantha. And it wouldn't matter. I thought it was her breast milk. No, you send her the breast milk. Oh. And then she makes like a ring out of it.

Let's see. We'll see if we get him back here in a moment, folks. I think he might be interested in this story. He might be. Alright, I'm having trouble. Is this one of them? A lot of hot girls named... Oh, there we go, yeah.

Look at... Oh, okay. So what's the point here? Why are people buying this? I think it's similar to what people do with the placenta. You know, where people will... They'll eat that. Some people do, but you can also just make stuff out of it.

If you found out that you could add 10 years on your life by eating placenta once a week, would you do it? Of course. Yeah, me too. It probably tastes exactly like a pork chop. I might do it anyway, just in case it adds 10 years. But how would you get that? Why aren't you telling me you anyway just in case it adds 10 years. Weren't you telling me you would do it if it took 10 years off?

Yeah. How would you get it though? Oh, I can get you a placenta. What was that? That was me trying to hold my laugh back. How much could ladies sell that for?

Oh. I laugh back. I wonder how much could ladies sell that for? Oh. Here he goes back to Google, folks. Buy placenta. Yeah, I mean, you could buy, like, pills. But I think, like, the point of it, or at least part of the point of it, is to eat your own.

Yeah, this is all, like, okay, this says, says like grass-fed beef placenta. This is like beyond placenta. Yeah, yeah. No, I want... Wait, from human. Impossible placenta. Human. Like, you've always said if you can think of it, you can get it online. Sure.

All right. Ooh, $240 for a frozen placenta. So, anyways, if you're in DFW, you can drop off your breast milk, and she uses a powder to preserve the milk and dehydrate it. And then they... Well, and here's the deal. They put it in a little ring for you. Okay.

What she does when you drive all that way... She just squirts a little bit of... She throws it away and she puts in whatever powder she already has. She's not actually going through all that effort. You're probably right. And she makes a video of her doing it once. And she'll send that to you and be like, here's the process. And you never kind of look at it.

Right. She's genius. Samantha is a mother of two and an advocate for breastfeeding mamas. While breastfeeding her littles, she fell in love with the idea of having keepsake of her breastfeeding and journey, and thus the Milky Rose Boutique was born. It's really weird. So she was doing that and thought, boy, I'd love to savor this moment forever. Because in my experience, most women are like, I hate this.

That is true. Yeah. It hurts. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Blah, blah, blah. You just want to forget about it. Oh. it hurts yeah yeah yeah blah blah blah we just forget about it

oh all jewelry can be made with breast milk or cremated ashes not where I thought he was headed so uh but I've heard of that before like people have like a locket I got grandma here on my ring finger yeah I've heard of that

do you want that I would not but I thought you were going to say semen well don't wear a next year surprise of that. Do you want that? I would not, but I thought you were going to say semen. Well, don't worry. Next year's surprise from the Milky Rose boutique. Yeah, I wonder if she would do that for us.

There's your 130 news. We should call her and ask her. Book her, Blake. The Dumb Zone News. The guest list is growing. Yeah.

Like and subscribe. The Dumb Zone presents Today in History. What? What do you have going on over there? Hey, babe, I just got you this ring with my semen in it. I hope you like it. Smells terrible. Sticky.

Now you can always have it around your neck. The worst gift ever. God, that's gross, Blake. Yeah, it has to be in the form of a pearl necklace, right? It has to be a locket on that. Right. Just for the theme. Or like an eyebrow ring.

An eyebrow ring. An eyebrow ring. A hair tie. Yeah. In the back of the hair. It'll hold that ponytail in place. This is the dirtiest show we've done. From probably the nicest place we've ever been. It's true.

It is true. It's a very nice place. How about on the business call? When the HR person jumped in? Like, hey, we just want to make sure, like, you know, like. Yeah. I just started. I just learned about you this morning, and I listened to one part of one episode.

Oh, no. And I'm still on board, but, like, just want to make sure you wouldn't be saying anything that would be blah, blah, blah. And it's like, yeah, no. It's totally cool. It'd be great. I think I tried to weasel us out of it with everything offensive we say, we're just joking about offensive things that other people would say. Right, doing a parody of it.

Like we wouldn't talk about breast milk, a free vial of breast milk with every apartment sold. We haven't even got there yet. You're already trying to ruin it. We're not good at business. Might not.

So on this day in 1917 three shepherd children reported seeing a vision of the Virgin Mary in Portugal these particular children would go on to say like five more times so this was the first of six

such apparitions that these children claimed to have witnessed so I would be thinking these kids This was the first of six such apparitions that these children claimed to have witnessed. So I would be thinking, these kids, wild imagination. Yeah. Well, on this day in 2017, so 100 years later, Pope Francis, during a mass in Portugal, added two shepherd children to the roster of Catholic saints honoring Francisco and Jacinta Marto,

who reported visions of the Virgin Mary 100 years earlier. So they ended up getting sainthood for lying. What happened to the third kid? I don't know. Yeah. Hey, you're right. It says three shepherd children, and then he did it for two. Something happened.

Maybe it was like a, I don't know, it was a boy and a girl, so I thought we were just leaving the girl out. Yeah. Sometimes we do that. Maybe it was like a Pete Rose type situation where he ran afoul of the Vatican. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Juiced up the... On this day in 1973,

in tennis's first Battle of the Sexes, Bobby Riggs faced Margaret Court. Not the one that I grew up knowing about. Billie Jean King is what you're thinking of. Yeah. So before the Billy Jane King thing he defeated

Margaret Court handily 6-2-6-1 in California that's like being named Pitt man Margaret Court yeah

although do you know she ended up do you know the Kemp spin on her can't say that I do this reared its head Do you know she ended up Do you know the Kemp spin on her? Can't say that I do This reared its head As Martina Navratilova

Gained prominence But Margaret Court Not on board with the gay Quite against the gay Now that you say that I do recall Not just like I don't know about it

Kind of a Tim Hardaway type. Yeah, yeah. Very Tim Hardaway. If you ask Margaret Court, she'd be like, look, I don't like them. Yeah. What are they doing there? What the hole? What the hole, yeah.

On this day in 1981, Pope John Paul II was shot and seriously wounded by a Kendrick Lamar fan. On this day in 2005, Tiger missed the cut at the Byron Nelson Championship. I recall this. That ends his record 142 consecutive cuts made over seven years on the PGA Tour. I remember at the time it felt like he didn't care. Really? I don't recall. Just like the idea that the Byron was like kind of also ran the tournament. It's like, whatever, if I'm going to miss one, I'm not up for it. Just like the idea that the Byron was like kind of also ran tournament. Oh, he didn't care about the Byron Nelson.

It's like, whatever. If I'm going to miss one, I'm not up for it. He would only play that. He didn't say it, but people would say, you know what? When Byron Nelson dies, he'll stop playing the Byron Nelson tournament. And guess what? They were right. He was only playing it to honor Byron Nelson.

And on this day in 2019, actress Felicity Huffman pleaded guilty in the college admissions bribery scheme, admitted paying a consultant $15,000 to have someone correct her older daughter's answer on the SAT. She ended up serving 12 days in prison. Yeah, that was a wild story. Do you recall the name of the FBI operation? I'm a big connoisseur of FBI operation names. No. It was called Varsity Blues.

Okay. Yeah. Okay. I liked that quite a bit. Because you know some guy was calling his buddy at night. He's like, I got it. Yeah, I pitched it. I had to pitch him a couple other crappy ones first of course yes they went with that she served 12 days return or something she had a two-week prison sentence but apparently got

good behavior for two days who is the lady that's the other college scandal thing we're saying her daughter was an athlete. I recall what you're talking about, but I don't recall the... Full House? Yeah. Yeah. It was USC. Is it Lori Loughlin?

Lori Loughlin. Yes. Good call. Okay. Well, I just recently saw her, and I still couldn't remember her name. She's in this final season of Curb. They joke about it? The whole way through.

Like, she, so she has a really good parking spot. And she's with Larry. And he's like, how did, and she's like, oh, got a, she had a handicap tag. Fantastic. He's like, how'd you get this? Oh, like, you know. That's awesome. She kept doing stuff like that.

Like, they were going to go golfing together, and they weren't allowed to use a cart. But then because of her handicap thing, she could use a cart and take it right up to the green. I think she got her daughter, like, on the rowing team. Yeah. Right? Like, without ever doing any rowing. Something like that. Yeah.

A lot of famous birthdays today. Daryl Sedor, former star, 52. Bobby Valentine is 74. You know who that is, Blake? Yeah, he wore the fake mustache after he got ejected from a game. Nice. Mets. Mark that, Beth.

Former Ranger manager, too. Yes. Tyron Matthew. Honey Ranger manager, too. Yes. Tyron Matthew. Honey Badger. He's 32. Dennis Rodman is 63. Mino. Don't forget, he was a Mav when you're doing...

Putting names on the court? The grid. No. Whatever you call that. Immaculate grid. Mike Bibby is 46. Friend of yours. Mike Bibby looked like mini-me,

but he was six foot tall. If you look at his face. There's something to this, yeah. He played for the Sacramento Kings, and he was, I don't know if he was heavily tattooed, but in the early 2000s, the tattoo was not as prevalent in the NBA.

Yeah. And he was in the NBA. Yeah. And he was in a book of tattoos. Like it was a book of different people that had different tattoos, and then it would just have the meaning behind it and all that kind of stuff. So Bob had this book, and we went to the locker room. Well, Bob gave me the assignment, and I just did it because Bob isn't going to go walk up to Mike Bibby. i walked up to mike bibby after like a king's game it was in sacramento during the playoffs and um i said hey i just wanted to talk to him and my in is i got this book

you could talk to me about your tattoos and he's like oh yeah and then he started talking about it and stuff and then he's looking at the book he goes can i have this and so i froze and i stammered and i go um yeah and then i left but i'm the jerk for not getting our playoff shirts so yes the retrospect on that is I could ask them for a pair of shoes, a jersey, a towel, just whatever. He's Mike Bibby. He makes a million dollars, whatever, back then. Not as much now as now, but still. And they just get free gear all the time. I could, hey, give me a sweatshirt. Just anything.

Yeah, what can you trade me for? See, this is where you got to make mistakes to then get it right. just get free gear all the time. I could, hey, give me a sweatshirt. Just anything. Yeah, what can you trade me for? Yeah. See, this is where you got to make mistakes to then get it right. Sure. And never again in my career have I ever been interviewing somebody and they asked for what I had.

Mm-hmm. Because the only thing I would do is the bit of, hey, dude, can you hold my dip cup? And no one's ever asked me if they could have that. You know, some years later, and that was a great story, by the way. Hey, thanks guys. I mean you. I tried something similar on a Dallas Stars

trip when Bob was like, hey this is a cool idea. You know, you go up and ask guys about their tattoos and I don't know if it's just because I just look like a dickhead but they were not feeling it. Like every player I asked, they were like, I don't know. I just got it.

I'm like, is there a backstory? Is it? And like Tyler was like, it's Toronto. And I'm like, okay, well, I wonder if that's just you sort of, I wonder if it's different generations because now they have so many, it's like they do just get one because they just kind of felt like it. Whereas back then it might've been like, I got three tattoos. They all mean something.

Yeah, my mom died. Yeah. Yeah, but if you were a hot female, I bet they'd answer you. Probably. Yeah. But I had very little luck with that bit. You did exude like, I'm a kick-ass dude kind of guy. I got tattoos too.

Yeah, bro. You want to see my tree?. I got tattoos too. Yeah, bro. You want to see my tree? You know, young Jake. Hi, T. Ready to fuck someone up. Barry Zito is 46. Moneyball. PK Subban, 36.

TV. Harvey Keitel, 36. TV. Harvey Keitel, 85. Stephen Colbert, 60. He's had a really weird life. Look into it. Colbert? Yeah. I've never watched the CBS show.

It's not good. I used to like him on The Daily Show. Yeah, for sure. And I thought, but I'm pretty sure like his whole family died in a plane crash.

Hmm. Was he the sole survivor? That's why I'm looking. Book him. Jesus. Stevie Wonder is 74. Can see. Okay, tell me about this. Morgan Wallen is 74. Can see. Okay, tell me about this.

Morgan Wallen is 31. What do you want to know? How many things? The first time we became familiar with him was he was caught on a ring doorbell camera using the N-word. Yeah. And he was set to perform on SNl sometime in the next like week or two they took him off there they put him back on a few months later and uh i believe in the interim his record sales skyrocketed right most recently he was at a bar in downtown i want to say nashville

but okay because this is all i knew stuff, but now you got more. Yeah, he threw from the sixth floor of a building, he threw a chair. And I don't think it was like a folding chair. He threw a chair off of a bar rooftop, narrowly missing two police officers. Okay, you did tell us this a couple of months ago. That chair was the size of which, if it would have hit one of them in the head, possibly would tell us this. And that chair was the size of which, if it would have hit one of them in the head, possibly would have killed them.

And he hasn't sold a record since. His popularity cratered. And his SNL thing. Did you just say that? I heard the chair thing. I didn't know about the making out with girls thing. Okay. Now that's a new one.

Now he's got a new one. What did you say? Go ahead. He was supposed to be on SNL in 2020. He got taken off of SNL because of the N-word thing. Okay. But yes, there is video of him. He had an appearance delayed.

Because during COVID, he was in an Alabama bar making out with girls. It might have been like a sorority house or something. Like a couple days before SNL, when people are supposed to be distancing. He may be right, but I feel like he was already in trouble. Okay. I hope I escaped. Am I safe? But he did mention the N-word and then followed that up with SNL. But didn't say it was because of the bar. It's true. All right. That's safe. But he did mention the N-word and then followed that up with S&L,

but didn't say it was because of the bar. That's true. All right. That's true. But yes, I have written down here, canceled for the N-word, album sales soared afterwards. This is all true. Because I love the cancel,

everybody complaining about cancel culture that really ends up helping their business. Yeah. Is there any terms you'd like to use? We could use a bump. We could use a bump. I'll work on that. Could use some subs.

Pusha T. The great Terrence Thornton. 47. Kind of the guy who started a lot of this. A lot of what? The Drake Kendrick thing. He's the one who made a lot of this. A lot of what? The Drake-Kendrick thing. Oh. He's the one who made him acknowledge that he has a son. Oh, okay. Nice. Yeah.

Darius Rucker, 58. Man, he got popped for like, weed and mushrooms recently. That's such a lame thing to get arrested for. In 2024? Yeah. Legal in half the country. Lena Dunham is 38.

Can't stand her. Like, who can? Is anybody like, I'm a big fan? I think TC's a big fan. All right. There you go. Robert Pattinson is 38.

Vampire. And Jennifer McDaniel is 50. Don't know it. The ex-wife of? Hulk Hogan. Wow. That's not... It was going the other way, but still interesting.

Now, was the Grease Man having sex with... It was not the Grease Man. It was Bubba the Love Sponge's wife, but... Had sex with Hulk Hogan. That's right. And Bubba watched. Does he have a sex bandana? Yeah, I think so.

I think so. I have a piece of audio I forgot to dump into the page here. Because he has court bandana. He has court bandana, God bandana. Mm-hmm. Born on this day, now dead, B. Arthur.

Jeff Ross once told a B. Arthur joke. Sandra Bernhardt, holy s***. I wouldn't f*** Sandra Bernhardt with B. Arthur's dick. And B. Arthur was in the crowd. That's a very good joke

and a very interesting piece of audio because clearly it was played at some point on your popular radio program and some words were beeped and some weren't. No, I found that today online. It was already like that. Okay. But it kind of was perfect.

Yeah. Go ahead. Finally, for born on this day not dead George Papinacola he invented and I swear I was just talking

about this with my wife the other day the pap smear wow and the reason I was talking to her about it was I was like

boy that's just a because she said something about a pap smear I don't know if she's getting a pap smear or something about it was I was like, boy, that's just a because she said something about a pap smear. I don't know if she's getting a pap smear or something about it. That's such a crude term. That's what I said.

I'm like, they couldn't have, like, if this was a man thing, and I think it's lamenting, you know, the female plight. We wouldn't, like, how about a pap application? Or a...

Paplication. Like, that's a very nice... If you just called it a paplication or a pap application, you'd be like, oh, okay, well, what... Right. But a smear... And you think there's kind of... I don't even know what they're doing down there.

Yeah. It's already a haunted place. That you don't even know what they're doing down there. Yeah. It's already a haunted place that you don't, you know. We don't need to add more disgust. It sounds like something you would do in a sink. You definitely have to shower after. You would have to. It's a smear. A smear.

A bagel. A bagel. Yeah, a smear. It's gross. I mean it again. I don't even Yeah, a smear. Yeah. It's gross. I mean, and again, I don't even really know what it is. No. I think my wife told me, but I blocked it out right away. But I think it rocks that that guy kind of went with, like, the hockey move of, like,

his last name is Papadocalypse or whatever, and he's like, call me Paps. Pap. Pappy. Also, died on this day, still dead, we have Margot Kidder which was Lois Lane in the original Superman movies.

Just a bad choice. I never saw it. I was like, I'm a big Superman fan, of course, from way back and sure, I mean,

we don't have to get... You know, I don't know. I don't know what you're talking about right now. She just didn't... She's just not good looking. Oh, okay. She's just kind of like real extra plain. I don't know.

Not a big fan. Let's call our guest over, Blake. And also died on this day in 2021, Shirley Cost. Take a look at Margot Kidder, and you'll see. You'll be like, really, Superman? Kind of getting any lady he wants. It's just her?

Yeah. Not the worst. Bit skinny for you, too. Definitely skinny for me, yeah. By the way, it was Colbert's two brothers and father. Died. died yeah plane crash I believe I believe then

she ended up like the National Enquirer Enquirer back in the day like in the 90s caught her like

going through a KFC dumpster or something for food Margot Kidder is that for real? Yeah. Okay. Yeah.

I mean, who would ever do something like that? She had fallen on hard times, not just because she was hungry like you. Shirley Cost is the Rangers cookie lady. Oh, wow. She would bring cookies to Buzz and Tom. And she died at the age of 90 on this day. Canonical Rangers fan, for sure. She's up there with Zonk.

And that was Today in History. All right, so we're out here today. We now have what we call final remarks, which is weird because you haven't even made any initial remarks. That is true. Don't you think? Now bring that microphone up to you near your face somewhere when we talk. Ladies and gentlemen, this is Rob Levinsky.

Hi-ha. He is the owner of where we are. Honored to have you. I'm not sure I can follow a pap smear, though. That's a hard act to follow. Right. But I did dumpster dive for an R2-D2, so I can follow a pap smear, though. That's a hard act to follow. Right. But I did dumpster dive for an R2-D2, so I can follow on Margot Kidder.

Okay. Actually, I was a little short. I made my 80-year-old employee dumpster dive for a plastic R2-D2. Your 80-year-old employee? Yeah. See, so I can tie into your show. There you go.

Okay, very good. I didn't even know I was relevant. So what is this called, where we are? So we're at my gallery. If you go to our website, irox. Okay, very good. I didn't even know I was relevant. So what is this called where we are? So we're at my gallery. If you go to our website, irox.com, you will see fine mineral specimens. For those who've seen Breaking Bad, they really are fine minerals, my dear wife. They are not rocks. And we sell mineral specimens, which some people call rocks or crystals, as objects of natural beauty and as an asset of class. This is a – walking around here, it's like a museum. Thank you.

So when we built the place, my idea is it's sort of like the freak love child of the Smithsonian in an art museum, right? It's nature's art. It's beautiful. an art museum, right? It's nature's art. It's beautiful. You think of them as museum objects, but when you put them in a boring museum on shelves with too much science-y signage, I think that loses some of the wonder

and the beauty because these things are older than dinosaurs. I mean, this is something that you got into not to make profit at first. Yeah, so it was a childhood hobby. You just like collecting. That's awesome. I think a lot of people collect stuff as kids, right? Erasers.

Normal kids collected baseball cards, comic books, whatever. Pest dispensers. Stamps. Yeah. I did a little bit of all of that, and then I fell in love with fossils. And then I went to my first fossil and mineral show in Columbus, Ohio, and saw all these sparkly crystals. I said, wow, those saw all these sparkly crystals. I said, wow, those are way more beautiful than fossils. And at 12, I became a mineral collector.

How many square feet are here? So I have sequentially expanded from my childhood bedroom closet to a house closet to a house spare bedroom, bribed a college roommate to move out and had a fake roommate in college to have a college dorm room display space, and steadily upgraded. So now we're in over 10,000 square foot of display space for minerals. It's like a museum, like you said. And I even saw the big giant room with all the to-be-displayed minerals that you haven't opened yet or that you ordered. You mean the stuff in the back? The stock room, yeah.

Mm-hmm. Yeah. When I buy too much stuff. That's what's happened here? People tell me you shouldn't have so much inventory. And so this is not a place, though, that we are telling the public to, hey, come on out and you can just walk in. No, we mostly sell online and private visits or at a few shows. There's worldwide shows in Tucson, Denver, Munich, and Nanjing.

And we're also not here for you. You do not listen to our show, right? Do I have to admit that on camera? You had never heard of us. No, but I just want to say this is interesting because... No, I'm a new client of yours. I'm a new listener. One of your big employees, your top employees, right?

Great guy. Who is named Romo. Romo, our photographer. But he said you named him Romo. I don't know that was me. I think there were too many Robs, so someone else corrected him. Because you're Rob.

I'm Rob. I would never have given someone the name Romo. I want Romo. That is a badass name. It's like Romeo, right? Yeah, but now he was a Rob, so you can't have two Robs. I would have taken Romo if I had a choice. Okay, but his last name starts

with an M-O, so he's Romo. Yeah, so he got it. Okay. It's better than Ro-Lee? Ro-Lev? Yeah, it does phonetically work a little bit better. So, tell us about Interpol. Yeah, so we phonetically work a little bit better. So tell us about Interpol. Yeah, so we sell rocks and crystals for the collector, for museums, for the community.

The problem is, you know, a lot of people think that rocks are gems. That's not true. Gems come from minerals. Gems come from crystals. We don't really sell gems. So when you go across borders carrying minerals, that's a whole different thing than carrying gemstones that you need to declare. And minerals are non-dutiable by a harmonized international tariff code

as non-economic ore resources for collectors and science. But they look valuable. So sometimes you have trouble at airports. So you ask, what? Inter airports. So you asked what? Interpol. Yeah, so what? Yeah, I mentioned. So I've been arrested a few times.

But, you know, it's all good. You know, it started when I was 18, and this Royal Canadian Mounted Police pointed a shotgun at me in Canada. And that was the worst, actually, because he thought I was bear poaching. But it turns out you could collect crystals behind this old garbage dump, and other people go there to shoot bears,

but I was going to collect ugly rocks. And, yeah, so that happened. And then I got arrested in Brazil because rubylite tourmaline, which you abbreviate R-U-B-I, sounds a lot, looks a lot like ruby, which you're not supposed to export from Brazil. That was a problem. But I talked my way out of it.

We slept over in the airport jail. And the next morning when the high-end gem store in the airport opened, they explained. And they knew me. They had a book in the airport gem store with my picture in it as a contributor. So that helped. I feel like this guy could be played by like Nicolas Cage. For sure. You know, and mostly

you go to China and places that are extraordinarily safe that don't arrest you, believe it or not. Isn't that ironic? It is. China seems safer than France. So you go to France, they do have national treasure laws. You're not supposed to take out things that are valuable in French. They're the ones who steal things from other lands and bring them to...

No comment. Yes, but maybe. So, Western culture likes things of other cultures, and we value them. With minerals, these are things that were not created by humans. So they're not generally subject to the kinds of natural, or the repatriation laws of other cultural artifacts, with very few exceptions. The French like everything French. So they want to look at their French minerals

before you travel with them and export them. So I bought a collection, and I purposefully did not have any French minerals. But that didn't stop one of my competitors from calling Interpol while I was on the plane and telling them that I did. So we got detained. Do you have competitors in the collection world? A few, mostly friendly competitors. Okay. Other than those that report me to Interpol while I'm on a plane. So what happens there? You get off the plane and... And we got arrested at the Houston airport and detained. And my partner behind the collection sort of looks and acts like a cowboy, lives in Tucson, keeps a few guns on the table in

the living room and the kitchen and that kind of guy. So he got into a screaming match where he was yelling at the airport security people that you know they'd take our minerals over his dead body and they brought in the biggest guy i've ever seen in an airport uniform and a gun and a badge and then he started yelling at him um and it went downhill but we called the uh museum in houston and they came and had a talk with the airport and sort of bailed us out around midnight. And it turns out, so I got a black mark on my passport. You know about this? So I don't remember learning in high school government class what your U.S. senator is

supposed to do for you. Apparently, when you get a black mark on your passport, you're a trafficker. Now, what are you trafficking? Like, you're a bad guy. With no details. So, I went to Canada next, and coming back from Canada, this nice little old lady at the customs said, oh, you don't look so bad. Why do you have this mark on your passport? Excuse me, sir. You'll have to wait. And I got strip searched in Canada. They zeroed out all my documents. So, it's bad mark. So apparently, we were supposed to learn in government class, you can call your U.S. senator. Just pick up the phone and call your senator. They can clean passports for you and get that cleared up.

And I'd never heard of that, never knew it. So I went through two years and a couple of lawyers trying to get this off my back. Because it's a problem when you travel that they don't like you at any airport. And I was venting to one of my customers and it turns out he knew a senator and he picked up the phone and made a call and we eventually got that wiped off. You know what I found out, Rob, is who you know. It is really, it was scary. I mean, I had no idea. It's like,

really? It's that easy? Yeah, let me call my senator. Yeah. So I didn't go back to France. So for two years, you were trying to do it the right way, or the way any normal human would have to. Yeah. And it doesn't work. And there's a way around that, apparently.

You gotta just know someone. Yeah. So we were told that... Wait, let me just follow up real quick. I'm not a bad guy. What is getting strip searched like? In Canada? It's general.

Oh, okay. Other places, maybe not. They're not making you bend over and just really searching every... Oh, okay. Wow. They're looking for minerals up there. They don't know how bad you are. You might be really bad. Yeah, you just have this black mark. To be honest, the bending over thing is kind of the only

reason you're doing it. Yeah, yeah, I guess so. You can probably keep your shirt on. I guess you could have stuff taped to you. You never know. So, you know, sometimes there was a case, though, at an airport. What was it? LaGuardia. You know, I was having a problem getting...

They're not rocks. Come on, man. They're fine minerals. Uh-huh. Remember Breaking Bad? Okay. So, was it LaGuardia? Yeah, I mean, they were giving me so much trouble,

and then one of the security guards came up and said to the guy who was giving me trouble, man, cut him a break. He's an astronaut or something. That you go with. I'm like, yes, I am, sir. These are space rocks. So what is your relationship with China? Because I'm reading here that they had part of the Great Wall of China closed for you to have lunch on. you to have lunch on. They did. That was crazy. What's that story? So I used to go to China a lot. Obviously, that stopped for a while. So I...

Because of the whole, like, guy who had sex with the bat thing. Bad things? It wasn't... It didn't used to be bad. It used to be a great place to go. I said bat. Bat. The bat.

It doesn't matter. The COVID thing. He was making a COVID joke. Sorry, the COVID thing. Did COVID start with a guy having sex with a bat? Your thoughts? Okay, no? All right.

I'm pretty sure no. So my original career was genetic engineering. You're not saying for sure. There's a lot on the web. I used to teach immunology. I'm pretty sure it wasn't a guy having sex with a bat. So, yeah, at least that. You know what?

Ironically, so I source minerals in China. I do museum exhibitions. I give lectures. Ironically, I started going to China because I didn't have the money. I was self-booted up, and all these fancy dealers with more money than I was were going to Brazil, cool places, Madagascar, going after gem crystals, Pakistan. I couldn't afford that. And Chinese minerals were cheap 20-something years ago. And I thought, wow, these things are beautiful. They're not fancy gem crystals with gemstone value, so other people aren't going nuts to get them. You know, I'll look at getting into this. So I started going to China, eventually learned the language, eventually opened an office in Shanghai. We had an office there until 2018, mostly for buying and a little bit for selling. And a lot of what we did was just show government officials what these things look like in cases. And we'd teach them that Western museums display these

as objects of inspiration. And, you know, they could do that too. It became a lot of adventures. I traveled, I went rural, I went underground. How do you get the Great Wall closed for you, though? Well, I didn't know they were doing that. Oh, okay. So what happens is you're drinking with government people.

It used to be, in the early years of Xi Jinping, you could get drunk for lunch and dinner with government guys. Okay, that sounds great. And, like, really go do stuff. So you got a lot of business done. Okay. A lot. Like, in the two hours, you're sober in between.

But it used to be, you know, you you get drunk at lunch and you go do something and so I didn't even know where I was going so yeah somebody took us to part of the Great Wall and it was my first visit I wanted to go to the really cool famous part but they didn't take us there they took us to this other part that was bigger and actually more amazing. And we got there and I was like, why are there no people? And we closed it. So they do things like that. That makes you feel good. They were good hosts.

Yeah. They were good hosts. And you know Chinese. You fluent? I'm not fluent. I'm conversational. Okay. And so I eventually married a Chinese lady who now has moved to America.

Now, do you guys converse in Chinese? We did when we met. So I met her at a mineral show, and she didn't know English, so it was my bad Chinese. She was fired up about the minerals? They're beautiful things. I think when people see them in the context we display them, they're beautiful. Can you say the value of everything you have in this warehouse? I can honestly say that I don't want to say, but also I don't know.

Look, here's the thing. You have price tags on these things as you look around. Some of them. Yeah. I do. Some of them, no. So, you know, when I was a kid, it was a hobby. And my whole career, my passion for this is driving it as it transitions from a hobby to

an asset class, and no one knew that would happen. No one really said, this is going to happen. Things are going to get more valuable and expensive, but it's happened organically and jumps and plateaus over the last 30 years, and I've gotten to be a part of it. So I started with $1 rocks and self-collecting out in the field. I had a truancy problem in high school because of that. Because you were so stoked on looking for rocks. I went looking for rocks. Where are you from? Fine Minerals. You're confusing me now. You're bad. You're the one who said rocks. Yeah, you said rocks first. Probably. Yeah, I'm from Columbus, Ohio.

When I was a kid, I ran into the columbus ohio rock and mineral society it used to be there's all these clubs with generally is that where you went to college uh no but i was gonna say generally old retired white guys in these clubs it's a lot more diverse now that it's gone on to the internet nothing is given went to college in houston uh grew up in houston as a student dealing with the Russians. So I spoke Russian at the time, and I helped open up Russia to mineral exports in a way. And that helped pay me my way through college. And then I went on to become a doctor. Went to eight more years of school in San Diego, during which my internet built up. You ever see the HTMLtml for or the books for dummies yeah you guys

like course dummy stuff right sure we're all about dummy stuff yeah so first edition html for dummies that was me that was my programming skill diving in that way diving and people in the middle world so you're a doctor what kind of a doctor they thought i was a guru of computers did you ever do a pap smear no but i did google it when i heard you talking yeah yeah i googled the origin of the word so i'm not the kind of doctor that likes like sticky ooey oozy gooey stuff or blood or fluids right so you don't do that no i was genetic engineering so um we i engineered mice made them radioactive damn lost a few of them, cut them up, and see what you screw up in the mouse to learn about. We were talking earlier about there was somebody who used to be genetically engineered with a basketball.

They had fused together. A human. Are you talking about The Fly? The movie The Fly? Exactly. It's kind of like that. I referenced The Fly, but it's Mavs Man. I'm going to go out on a limb and say maybe that's not accurately genetic engineering.

Oh, okay. That might be common, Booker. You might be looking at the wrong Instagram. Okay. But that's incredible. So you're a genetic engineer. Would that be what you call yourself? Yeah.

If you're that. And you're fusing mice. You're doing stuff with mice, making them radioactive. Making COVID. Making COVID. Making COVID. Could have. We looked at military applications at the time. And you decide, you know what?

I'm just going to stop doing this now. And I'm just going to go full time into the minerals. Okay, so let's see. Wait, so let's see. Who do we know who's left a completely legitimate job? Wow. Maybe with a big career in the future. With a bunch of people working for them,

and said, you know what, maybe I want to work for myself and do my own thing. We're running out of time. No, I totally get it. Dude, he's a press guy. So I was in school for 12 years, and I built my internet business.

So it was my hobby, and then it was a business. And then at some point, you're like, well, shit, maybe I'm going to have a lot more fun doing this. And you worry, well, maybe it'll be boring maybe i won't be i mean right you have the same maybe i won't be surrounded by the same amount of interesting people and right opportunities

but you are and then you're stuck with it because it's addicting yeah to do your own thing so i'm surrounded by people who love nature who love art who love buying cool toys that you can't buy elsewhere. So people you employ, they're into this. This is their passion too. Interesting group of people. Yeah. And I get to travel the world. So for China, I spent most of the last 20 years, I think I've been 60 or 70, maybe more

times. I don't know. Damn. And we have a gallery there, a home there, business and friends there. And I was consulting for museums. And as long as I'd get drunk and pickle my liver, it was great. And I got to travel all over China at other people's expense. You stop drinking, you got to pay your own way.

You flying PJs? Hmm? Private jets? Hmm. Sorry, I missed that term. I'm thinking, did I bring pajamas on the plane? No, I was just wondering about, you know, you just really wanted to say that. I just wanted to say PJ,

trying to work that in. Now, the Indian guy, the big Indian guy, if you look around and you see Indian minerals in these rooms, you fly to India to visit him. He'll fly around on a,

well, military jet. Okay, I was about to correct you and say Native American, but then you came out with the fly to India. Yeah, I'm very precise. Yeah, no. I should have realized that.

Can we get back to the military application of COVID and Ebola? We're about done with biochemical. It seems like he was about to tell us some. I did not go into biochemical warfare. I went into preservation and education of natural assets. It's much easier. Well, this is very cool.

So thanks for coming. And yeah, I was going to say thanks for having us, but as I said before, we're here at the behest of one of your employees, but I can't believe how cool this, like, he's like, yeah, I could have had you over to my house, but that wouldn't have been cool. This is awesome, and it is.

This place is awesome. It is by appointment only, if somebody does want to come by here, if you're really into this. Yeah, look at our website. It's in Richardson. If this is the kind of thing you like, we have more.

But we do promote on the website. It just fascinates you that just all the stuff that's happening under our... How would you know this was here? Well, we're very... And this is the largest in the world? For a facility of this type, yeah. Now, mostly the public sees these things in museums.

So if I could give a pitch here for Dallas, the Perot Museum, Nature and Science, is a great place to go and view these minerals. If you go and look at the mineral hall, you'll see my name. I've donated a few things. I've loaned a few things. And everything else is loaned by members of our collecting community. And they rotate in and out. But the public can go to the Perot Museum and see a world-class exhibit. And you want value, it's over $100 million. It might be $200 million of treasures in the middle of the museum that is not advertised as much as it should be, sitting here in Dallas, and we actually have a world-class mineral

and crystal exhibit downtown. And I'd be proud of people to go see that as a result of the show. If you want to learn more about minerals, go to my website, irox.com. irox.com. And you also have mineralauctions.com, more for the collectors, you say? Yeah. So we started an auction site back in the late 90s. And we pretended it was automated because I couldn't afford automation.

So it was me and a partner taking turns staying awake at night. And we'd manually update the auction numbers all through the night. And eventually it grew. So for most of the last 24 years, I was a laughingstock in the mineral world for doing these mineral auctions. But it built and built, and now it's a power. And if you want to get into collecting minerals, you can go look and learn. All right. That's cool, man.

Thank you. Very cool. Quite an interesting existence you've carved out for yourself. Well, I think my friend, who you call an employee, Romo, thought we should meet. He thinks you're a little weird and you like all kinds of things. Yeah. I think he thinks I'm a little weird. Yeah.

Random things. Yeah. No. Well, thanks to you, Rob. Thanks to Romo. And yeah. Thank you. And wish you well.

I don't know. How do we close this out? No, that was pretty good. That's Rob. We're good. Thank you. And wish you well. I don't know. How do we close this out? No, that was pretty good. That's Rob. We're good. Thank you. Rob Levinsky. We'll put your website and everything in our show notes.

Thank you. Any final, final remarks? Now we can actually have final remarks. Final remarks on minerals. Or just on anything that's on your mind. I'm a scientist. I'm an academic. No, that's okay.

I'm a scientist. I'm an academic by training, but I don't look at these things that way. When I look at a beautiful mineral, I feel this visceral thrill. This came from nature. This is art from nature. They're older than dinosaurs. Every day they excite me. Were you fired up about the eclipse?

That's pretty cool too, but I can't buy it, keep it, and sell it. I like learning through acquisition. Capitalism at the end of the day. So yes, capitalism is a good note to end the day on. So were you trying to mix COVID and Ebola? All right, Blake. And then were you going to spread it? Something like that was a thesis proposal.

There we go. Do they really have... You can do that. Are you limited in how many kids you can have in China? So now, no. Now they're paying you

to have many more. Oh, really? Like they're like, yeah, we screwed up. If you want to talk about China, I mean, that's an interesting place.

There's a lot going on that is not reported in the Western media. I've been to Hong Kong. Yeah, so like Hainan Island is the new Hong Kong in the future. They're going to close it off in 25.

I think they'll move all the university kids over, building convention center businesses there. But no, they want kids. Young people are having trouble getting out of China now. Young people return to China, they get their passports clipped, they want them to stay.

They need more babies. They'll pay you to have babies. And part of the problem is that they ended up with way too many males. Yeah. Well, my wife has one of six kids in her family, but that's rural China. All the urban people were not having babies. Like on average, less than two, maybe less than one.

Rural people had many, but they couldn't move. They're not mobile. A lot of them have to stay where they come from. So despite trying to put a cap on the population, they still have tons of people. They have tons of people, but they're not all where they want them to be and not all the right age cohort.

And now there's a cultural penalty against having too many kids because it's expensive. And the older people look down on you when you have too many kids because they didn't get to have too many kids because it's expensive. And the older people look down on you when you have too many kids because they didn't get to have too many kids, right? There's a lot of problems coming from that. All right.

It's a state planning nightmare. They're going to implement plans to deal with it, I'm sure. But it's not like there's one policy, one China. It's different from the big cities to the rural regions. Sounds like there's way too much here for me to start talking about. All right. Well, thanks very much again. Hey, thanks for coming and looking at minerals.

Adios, mofo. Thank you. Jake, now they don't hang There's no more hang And he used to hang Jake, he used to hang And Jake, they used to hang Now they don't hang Cause now they're two You're in the dumb zone We're having fun

You're in the dumb zone We hope you come We're in the dumb zone I just said come We're in the dumb zone There's so much good In the dumb zone Come, come, come

It's not the calm zone This is the dumb zone