The Dumb Zone FREE - The Dumb Zone 7-15-24

Episode Date: July 15, 2024

Hear every episode of The Dumb Zone by subscribing to our Patreon - Patreon.com/TheDumbZoneIn this episode of The Dumb Zone, Dan, Jake, and Blake kick off with a laid-back Monday chat about their weekends and the scorching heat. They dive into sports, discussing Lincoln Riley's potential with USC and Duce Robinson's role. The trio also welcomes special guest Danny Balis, who joins in on the fun and shares insights. The episode is filled with humor, insights, and the unique charm that makes The Dumb Zone a must-listen. Oh, and Trump almost got assassinated. (00:00) - Open with Danny Balis (35:36) - Sports: Cuban, Paris Mayor (01:04:24) - Viewer Mail (01:22:30) - Today in Trump (01:42:55) - News (01:56:22) - Today in History ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Hello, I'm Dan McDowell, longtime professional broadcaster. Why subscribe to our Patreon podcast? Well, perhaps you support our struggle to get out from under the oppressive thumb of the man. Or, objectively, if you sign up at patreon.com slash the dumb zone, you'll get the two episodes per week that are available on all podcast platforms, like this one, plus an additional two episodes each week that are exclusive to Patreon. So subscribing on Patreon gets you four episodes per week. Oh my, what a bargain. Now, on to today's program.

The Dunzo. The Dunzo. The Dunzo. This guy. This guy! How we doing? Monday. Third cup already. I know it. Good weekend? Just took her easy. Just kind of hung. It was hot. It was so hot! Right. We could use some rain, you know? My grass is like, hey. We could use some rain, you know? My grass is like, hey. Like hey, I need some water. It is indeed Monday.

We have a case of the Mondays. It's a question of whether or not you're big on Baltimore. You see, it's right up there. And then primetime. Yeah. You remember, Blake, when... Isn't it great when we could just turn off the TVs in the studio and Jake wouldn't be distracted?

I didn't really understand why, but now I get it. Yeah, I have a severe case of ADHD. Because I too am now wondering, can Lincoln Riley bring USC to the promised land? What does he have to do this year? I don't know. That's a thing. That's the question that they're asking. Only answers Paul

Feinbaum can provide. And Deuce. I think with Deuce Robinson, yeah. If they just unleash him. Just let him go. If they would let the Deuce? I think with Deuce Robinson, yeah. If they just unleash him. Just let him go. If they would let the Deuce get loose. 20 targets a game. Yeah, he needs to make a little noise in the media.

That helped T.O. It did. T.O. Terrell Owens. I believe the next week they provided him with an end-around handoff. Then went for one yard. So let me tell you where we are and stuff after I just say we got a guy sitting in with us today. You may know him as Danny Bayless. Wow. Daniel Bayless.

Did he make an open for himself? He did. I mean. Daniel Bayless. Did he make an open for himself? He did. I mean, a while back. Okay. Damn it. I guess I sort of made it, but yeah. Okay. You just decided let's not use it today then?

If you're going to yell at me here? Like, he's screaming at me. I am not yelling at you at all. You don't need this. It's Monday at me. I am not yelling at you at all. I don't need this. It's Monday, dude. I would never do that. So Danny's hanging with us, and you could even see that on video. For sure.

Today's a YouTube day. Hello, World Wide Web. How's it going? I'm Dan McDowell. I'm Jay Kemp. I'm Blake Jones. Danny. Hi'm Blake Jones. Danny. Hi, Blake.

That's not really how it goes. You've already been introduced. Okay, yeah. Danny Bayless. But also, like, Kaclin could weigh in. Well, yes. So providing the video today is the great Michael Copeland from... Copeland Ministries.

Is it copelandproductions.com? Copeland production? A Copeland production. Copeland production? Yes.

Singular? Singular. Now do the thing where it pops up on the screen. Okay. Look at this. Can you have like a little...

You want some glitter? Yeah, sure. Yeah, like a... Look at that. That's why I wear a black shirt. Yeah. So you can put the thingy over me. The text, for sure.

It's been so long since we've seen Michael Copeland Man Look he's still hot He's looking so good The hair He's so good I just He's in great shape

I look at him and I just I want to be him Yeah That's the way my wife feels about him When she sees him She wants Me to be him as well Look at him

He's got a god damn Stanley Cup But it doesn't look gay No me to be him as well. Look at him. He's got a goddamn Stanley Cup. But it doesn't look gay. No. He pulls it off. He could do whatever. He could have a man purse and he'd be like, oh, he just looks cool.

He's got a chomp meat stick right now. He's a big meat stick guy. Anyway. That's something that I bring to your house and you make fun of me. Yeah. He just has it and you're like, cool. He looks awesome, yeah. You look funny. A make fun of me. Yeah. He just has it and you're like, cool.

He looks awesome, yeah. You look funny. A little stick of meat. With him, there's evidence that the chomp stick works. Yeah. With me, there's not. Yeah. Yeah.

That's fair. We're just like, oh, Jake, you like to put a little meat stick in your mouth, don't you? You homo. Anyway, the reason Michael is here is because it was demanded that Michael Copeland be here. By today's 690 sit-in remote host thing, whatever, our second ever visit to Caroline. It's Caroline, correct? Pfeiffer. And she just gives a thumbs up, despite the fact I think there's probably a microphone available to her. There's one by the chair.

Oh, it's by the chair? She's humble. She is. We've been out to her beautiful estate in the past. Sure. And she is with her husband, Mark. Now, we are not at their beautiful house. We are instead at Mark's beautiful office, which is...

Quite beautiful. We call him, or he beautiful office, which is quite beautiful. He calls him Mortgage Mark. Because his name is Mark. Any alliteration? You don't do mortgages, so that's what's weird about it.

So, thanks for having us out again, Caroline and Mark. And if anybody wants to grab that mic and acknowledge things, or if you just want to wait till closing remarks or whatever. Remarks. Get it? No. Mark's remarks.

Yeah. Moment of silence for Richard Simmons. Whoa. Did we kill him? Yeah. Yeah, I don't know that we killed him, but. It was his birthday Friday, right? It was, yeah. He made it. He made it to his birthday, and then he said, I don't know that we killed him, but... It was his birthday Friday, right? It was, yeah.

He made it. He made it to his birthday, and then he said, I'm out. Yeah, like I said on Friday, I didn't know he was still alive. I thought probably dead. You thought it was AIDS, right? Just assumed. you said that okay

I don't know that I thought it was probably AIDS well I certainly don't want to throw anything bad on your left let's get all mad about it I'm not mad about it I thought that it was like that he had had that weird conservative situation

and then over the weekend he just dies. Yeah. He'll be missed. He'll be greatly missed. I don't know that anybody's been checking for Richard Simmons for 30 or 40 years.

I don't really know what he did. I guess he was just like fitness guy before fitness guys were like famous. No. So back in the day, there was fitness people. Like Jack LaLanne and stuff like that? Yeah.

And Jack LaLanne is like all tough. Right. And badass looking. You're like, like clearly that's a fitness guy but so like Richard Simmons being who he was was like appealing to women yes so he was more of a effeminate it was just get moving yeah so yes he was more it didn't mean like lift weights more my body type maybe. Doughy. Probably a little better shape than me, but his was just like, come on people, let's go.

And then it would be a bunch of fat ladies in the exercise class or 40 some year old ladies or the occasional dude. But it was mostly just for, it was exercise for the normies. It wasn't like – You didn't have to be intimidated.

Intimidated. Yeah, by looking at Richard Simmons up there. Yeah. Yeah, so anyway, again, he will be greatly missed. Our country lost a great man and a great leader. How old? It is. How old?

76? No one knows. Is that right? That's the thing. No one knows. No one could know. I think it was mid-70s. Yeah. I mean, a guy that works out that much, a little young, right?

You would expect to keep going a little bit longer. Yeah, but he wasn't really working out. He wasn't, like, going to max or whatever, right? Maximum. Not max. My trainer. Wasn't doing sprints. Maximum?

Yeah. Like, don't you want to, like, push it? I don't think he was pushing it. Let's do a weekend check. And I'm going to say this weekend check is brought to you by Prosper Ford. Prosper Ford, of course, is where my buddy Chaz Gilmore has opened up his brand new dealership in Prosper, Texas. You've heard of Prosper, right up the tollway? I have.

Not that far from here, as a matter of fact. We're right off the tollway here at Mortgage Marks. But brand new, certified, pre-owned. They have ranges from electric cars to two-door coupes to full-size trucks. And, of course, the SUVs like the Ford FM50, Maverick Escape, Mach-E, and many more. In fact, so I was driving the Bronco Sport. That's my new bit. I'm driving the Bronco Sport.

Yeah, that's the car that you throw an apple at me. That's right. That's because it's called Sport. Yeah, that's the car that you throw an apple out of at me. That's right. That's because it's called Sport. So you can do sporty things. He threw an apple at you? Yeah. Out the window. After I ate the apple. So, the Bronco Sport, I realized on the way over here

because I was looking for where to plug in my phone. You don't need to now. Just set it down. You lay it on the thing. Wow, that's sporty. And to plug in my phone. You don't need to now. Just set it down. You lay it on the thing. Wow, that's sporty. And then it charges the phone. Like, will Ford, like they got their scientists in the lab just working day and night coming up with this stuff for us.

Yeah. And Chaz Gilmore, Prosper Ford, that's kind of like your hub. The lab is probably there. They haven't shown us it. We don't need to know, though. But you ever see the Breaking Bad lab? It's like below the ground. You don't know.

It could be underneath Prosper Ford. So maybe go investigate up there. Head up to Prosper Ford. Tell them that you appreciate them promoting the dumb zone, and they'll just look at you like, what? What? And then we just want you to buy a vehicle or two or 10 from Prosper Ford. Go to prosperford.com and say, I want that little charging pad thing that I heard Dan talking about. So we now move on to-

I've got to be honest. I didn't know that existed. What? Are you kidding? I didn't know until I got this vehicle. You didn't know wireless charging existed? Not in a vehicle. Like it's already in the vehicle.

You don't have to plug anything in. I did not know that. It's great. We think it's awesome. I mean, it's been around a while. I think, in my mind, Prosper Ford sort of innovated this. They did. And they should be... They did. they should be considered as the front runners on this technology.

Right. They're like the guy that invented the fries or the McNugget. The gold standard of wireless vehicle charging. That's exactly right, Danny. Who wants to start on a weekend check? I got a little something. Go for it. Okay.

Then I guess I'm starting. You offered. This weekend, Danny Bayless. I'm talking to Danny Bayless. Okay. And doing a little walk trying to get my steps in. So I'm outside. Like Richard Simmons would watch you. It's eight million degrees out and I'm walking around talking to Danny. Yeah. And I don't know, we were talking about hooking up or when we're going to discuss this or that. And I said, around talking to Danny. Yeah. And I don't know, we were talking about hooking up or when we're going to discuss this or that. And I said, you know what? Maybe don't call me tonight after seven.

I said, I'm probably going to be sundowning. Oh. So that's become a new term that I've worked into my game because of the Biden-Trump debate where Biden was just all over the place, and then some people are alleging, you know what? He could be sundowning. That's what happens to people getting early Alzheimer's

or just to olds. They're sharper in the morning, but as the day goes on, they kind of lose it, and then as the sun goes down, they are fading. Yes. So I said to Danny, I might be sundowning because I kind of had the plans of, how about a nice gummy? You know, sometimes... That's not typically what people mean when they say sundowning. I understand what you're saying.

So I just, in my head, I'm thinking, you know, what am I going to do tonight? Where are we going to eat? What am I going to do afterwards? Maybe I'll pop in a gummy. And I told Danny this. I said, that's why I'm saying sundowning. That's just my funny thing. And he said, you're gum downing.

And I am now going to work that into my game. Okay. I wanted to credit Danny the first time because eventually, I'm going to say this so often that people are going to think I came up with it. It's yours. I think it's the first time that I've ever, in 25 years of knowing Dan, heard him actually laugh at something I say. I want to refute that and say that I'm in love with Dan McDowell.

That made him laugh? I don't know. I feel like I've seen him laugh at that. It more made me cry, yeah. Tears of joy. A scoop of... Let's see here. A teaspoon at night.

A teaspoon at night. Okay, so then I had some issues going on with the wife this weekend. Oh, no. So, number one. I love this. Number one. He has a list. I keep a list of every fight he has with his wife.

Well, number one. We have a lot of lists. This wasn't a real issue, but it was we were going to do some work on the pool, just do some yard work, some stuff. And it was middle of the day, Saturday. And then I said, hey, you know what? I'm going to go put on my long sleeve shirt. Yeah.

Because of another recent conversation we've had. Yep. About, I guess it was Jake's landscaper that goes out there, long-sleeved shirt, long pants, giant hat. Like, he's really covering himself, and he's... Latino. Right, there you go. Yeah.

He's, yeah, he's, and you would think, oh, my gosh, darker skin, isn't that better for you against the, aren't you? No, apparently not. And this guy who's a landscaper, he's a professional. So I'm a weekend warrior landscaper. This guy's out there each and every day thinking the best thing to do, the safest thing, is to go long sleeves. And then we got a lot of email response on that,

a lot of feedback that, yes, indeed. In fact, you know, like just wearing short sleeves in the sun, you're going to be cooler wearing a long sleeve shirt. So anyway, that's why I did that. She told me. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. And I said, you know, the Latino guys doing it.

She says. Here comes the Today Show. Can I bang a quick 20? I don't feel like you said Latino. Okay. I might have said it could be Mexican guy. Anyway. You don't.

Dang. Both are right. You know, I might need a tiny modicum of support from you today. I will provide you with all the support you want. I'm just trying to keep you honest. I need some yes ands. Got it. My wife said, well, maybe that's because they're illegal

and they need to keep covered up. That is patently the dumbest thing I've ever heard in my life. Do you think somebody's driving by with facial recognition cameras? First of all, I don't believe she said that. I think ever heard in my life. Do you think somebody's driving by with facial recognition cameras? First of all, I don't believe she said that.

I think you've made that up. Someone's driving by with an iPhone. They're covering up their gang tattoos. Yeah, I think that's foolish. And then the actual argument that we got in.

So now we're cleaning out the shed, doing the yard work, like I said. Oh, God. The worst. The worst. Those mud dauber wasps have their little huts all over there. You said we? Yeah.

Oh, you get some help doing that. Yeah, she was actually out there. Uh-oh. That sounds good. Can't wait for your weekend check. But you won't kill them though, right? I don't kill the mud daubers, no. Yeah.

In fact, I escorted one out of the house this morning. Put it on a little piece of paper and walked him out. Said, hey, we're going out there. What a waste of your time. The shed clean is just... Why? I need... The ecosystem needs to stay intact.

He's about to die. If I killed one of them, that could throw everything off and then all of a sudden we've got famine. Yep. And I don't want that in my... Famine. ...in my conscious... The shed clean is just... You can't beat that as far as like...

It's the hottest you'll ever be in your life. It's so hot in there, man. Yeah. And then you're using the blower to once you and then it's all the stuff's in your face that's man i should have gone yeah dust so i should have gone and found one of those nice uh masks that i didn't really need for covid face diaper yeah i have a bunch of those still i didn't even think about that and i'm coughing up a storm anyway so she had in the shed i don't't know, you're more of a Marie Kondo

guy. We are a, we store a lot of things. So like, if we have an old coffee pot that kind of doesn't work anymore and we get a new one, she'll save that old coffee pot. Like, I could donate this. And then it'll sit in the garage for two years

and then we throw it away. But I need that buffer period with her. Well, we had this argument a couple years ago about the old vacuum cleaner. So she's like, don't throw it away. I want the old vacuum cleaner. Why? And I go, why? It's still workable.

It's salvageable, blah, blah, blah, blah. So now it's been in the shed. And so now it has a couple of mud dauber things on it, and it's real dusty and everything and we're cleaning out the shed and she says well let's throw this away like it's her idea now it was my idea two years ago when we got a new vacuum cleaner yeah you can't let that slide but she goes here throw this in the recycle bin and i go now this is where the argument started i go you can't just throw a vacuum cleaner in a recycle bin.

She's like, it's made of plastic. I go, yeah, but it doesn't work like that. It's got metal things inside it, and they won't just take that. They're going to end up throwing it away. You're just going to cause more work for them, and we were in this big argument, and I felt I was right, but then as I walked away, I realized that I just argued really hardcore, and I really

didn't know. I had no idea. And that she might, in fact, be right, but I kind of got swept up in the moment of arguing, and then it turned into a thing. It was more about the engagement than the actual product. Like, she just doubted the wise old me when I first brought it up, and then I had to stand my ground. No, you were right.

Like a major league umpire. You can't recycle a vacuum cleaner. Okay. Oh, man. There are things that on the actual damn dumpster

or trash can that tells you what the little symbols of what they all are and vacuum cleaner is not one of them. Yeah. She throws everything

in that can. Many recycling centers take vacuums. Wow. Recycling centers, but not for your takeaway dumpster. Okay. Yeah.

Maybe you're right. That's like glass, models, cardboard. I mean, it's really limited on what you're supposed to put in those things. Okay.

Yeah. And I mean, you know what I've been saying for probably a year now. I think recycling is a fraud. Yeah, but I feel really good when I do it i feel good when i do it when you tell me that and i still do it yeah so even though i believe it i still do it and i rinse out everything i know you go cans yeah you put a lot of effort into it yeah i mean they're gonna have to rinse them anyway. I'm helping them out.

So how did this end up? It ends up, it's just still sitting outside. We haven't done anything with it yet. That's a bulky trash thing. Do you guys have that once a month where they come out with the crane and pick up all your crap? Dude. I don't know. You know, branches.

I would just set it out there. Yeah, just set it out there. Somebody will take it. I got to say. Maybe the guy that wears the long sleeve shirts, he'll show up. He'll figure it out there. Yeah, just set it out there. Somebody will take it. I got to say. Maybe the guy that wears the long-sleeved shirts, he'll show up. He'll figure it out. The Southlake scene is quite different because it's all automated. Like in Grapevine, they still come pick it up, put it in the back, dump it out.

Okay, yeah. We have an automated recycle bin thing. Yeah. The big arm comes down, picks it up, and throws it in the Okay, yeah. We have an automated recycle bin thing. The big arm comes down, picks it up, and throws it in the back. Whereas we have actual trash guys who will actually. So if I put it out on trash day,

that'll be fine. Because dudes, they haven't taken our jobs with AI trash yet. You're saying the garbage trucks in Southlake, they all have grabber arms, and they dump it into the hopper. The recycle trucks. The recycle trucks definitely do. That's the same in Dallas, too. It's not the trucks in Southlake, they all have grabber arms and they dump it into the hopper. The recycle truck. The recycle trucks definitely do.

That's the same in Dallas, too. The garbage truck doesn't. It's not the same in Grapevine, though. Yeah. Like where I actually live, I take my son out there twice a week so that he can watch the trashman. That's probably because William D. Tate. Well, do you put your trash out in front or in the alley? Because the alley, they're going to use guys that are on the back of the truck.

No, we put it out in front, but what I'm saying is they don't have an arm. They don't have the thing that Southlake has. The truck is equipped with a different thing. Yeah. And they pick that thing up and- Now, I see what you're saying. There's a one-person job there. Well, they have the ones that are on the rear, Jake,

where you put the bin up on the rear, and it lifts it over like that right into the back of it. And then you have the ones that have the side, those grabber arms that go up the side. That's for like front-of-house pickup. What I'm telling you is that in Grapevine, a guy picks the trash can up and throws it into the back of the trash truck. I'm also saying that not every single truck situation may be like that.

It may be specific to the type of neighborhood because you need flexibility. Maybe some of their stuff is alleys. That's possible. Some of it is where you actually need a person to get out and do some of those. So I bet they're not exclusively, you know, because that's a lot of manpower to pay. Hey, hey, guys, back to your respective corners. Will Dion lead Colorado to the CFP? Jesus Christ.

Look at their title. Anyone else? Bold and Boulder. Want to chime in on their weekend? I love it. I still love how Dan thinks that the murder of one mud dauber could create famine. Like you just really jumped about 8 million steps

in the butterfly effect to get to there. Yeah. I'm not going to doubt him though. I like to think ahead. God forbid you kill two, we might end up in pestilence. Our actions have consequences. I just knew that Blake had killed one last week. I haven't heard pestilence since Bible school.

Blake killed one last week, so I had to save one this week to balance it out. It has wings and a stinger. If I see it, I'm going to kill it. Am I wrong? I'm not going to stop you. So, took Brooks to the Rough Riders game yesterday. Nice. And thought about those minor league things that you'll take your kid to

because they don't know the difference. Of course. Like we talked about with the Dallas Freeze and the Fort Worth Fire. Yeah. So third or fourth Roughrider game this season. Yesterday was Bluey Night. Oh, my gosh. At the Roughriders game.

How much are tickets? They can't be more than like 20 bucks. I bought four and I think it was 60 bucks. So it's a great deal. Hold on. Four? My parents. Okay. Who else would it be?

I don't know. So you didn't go with your wife? No, she works weekends now. So I'm on weekend kid duty. Are you guys getting along good? Me and my wife yeah um yeah yeah you're okay you want to talk later yeah i do actually um you don't have any like pre-empty nest activities going on in your home like dan does things to keep you distracted from the fact that you can't stand each other? I mean, I'm... Like cleaning out the garage and the shed

and arguing over vacuum cleaner recycling. No, I've resorted to more gum downing. Okay, fantastic. That way you don't go to bed mad, you know? Yeah. No, but she started a new job where she works every Saturday, Sunday. So now the kid is my duty every Saturday, Sunday.

And so now I'm trying to think of things to do outside of the house so he's not just parked in front of the television. And it's too damn hot to do anything. And can't go to the park, can't go to the splash pad, can't play outside. The mall isn't what it used to be. No. I used to be a big mall guy with the kid. Are you sure about that?

Dude, I take Malcolm to town east mall at least once or twice a month yeah i guess it depends which mall i'm thinking of the lewisville one that's the ridge uh is it it's now called like the music city something and it's it's a ghost town or at least it was a few years ago last time it's a lot of acreage that's air conditioned to let your kid run wild ass. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I still use it. See, that's my thing about Grapevine Mills. You know, they have an aquarium.

They have Legoland. They have a bunch of other BS that you can walk around through. You can kill two hours there, no problem, for very little money. Get your steps in, too. You can also get your steps in too you can also get your steps get my 10k in no i bring that up because um we've talked about this before but you know when i'm all old and stuff and brooks has grown up and he hates my guts i'm gonna think back to the time when he was two and a half and we were best buds yeah and how i should have cherished that time and now i'm

like god damn how can how slow is this weekend going? How can I just get forward to Monday? An hour feels like it takes 12 hours. Every single weekend. Can you take another nap? Yeah. Can you... No.

Can you go play with your friends somewhere? But I'm supposed to enjoy these times, and I don't know how. Yeah. The whole goal is now just to make them tired enough to go to sleep. As they say, Blake, the days are long but the years are short.

I know it. It's so true just how much everyone tells you it's going to go by so fast. Cherish it. But when it's happening, you just want it to go by. Yes, I just need this to be done.

I need you to go to bed. NCAA comes out in two days. We need to prep. By the way. Today at 3 o'clock. I was going to say. So if we could wrap this up. I was going to say, Dan.

We're losing him today. You're jumping right on. No, I have stuff to do. But tonight, I'm thinking I'm going to take on the Texas Tech Red Raiders. We're going to play it to Amon G. Carter. I think that's the game I'm going to go with first. Anyway. You pre-bought.

Yeah, I got the deluxe edition. Yeah. I got early access. Yeah. So we show up to Bluey night, and, you know, they have, like, Bluey stuff to do between innings, but the main attraction was you can get your picture with Bluey. Yeah.

Which is a guy in a suit from 6 to 8.30. Like the one that I talked about or like an actual Bluey? No, it's just a guy in a suit. Okay, but we talked about this news story where people freaked out about it, right? That was like a month ago. It was just a black guy in a Bluey coat. I don't know if that was necessary. Yeah, it was a. How did you know?

Did you open up his food hole to see what was inside? It was just a very poorly constructed costume. Yeah. I mean, it was so obvious that it was just... They had promoted it at a restaurant, and everybody thought it's going to be like... Just imagine's going to be sponsored by Bluey Incorporated itself and have a real... Oh, okay. But it was like a guy who had put together some stuff.

This costume looked like Eddie Murphy as Gumby. It was exactly. It was super, super shitty. And the one that I went to, it's called Camp Store in Dallas. Like that was bluey. So is that what you got or? It looked like a legit bluey. And so we walk into the restaurant.

It's got a bluey backdrop. And see, now you got it in my head. A bluey backdrop. And it's a big bluey. And all the kids are standing next to him. take pictures you know look at the line it's not that bad it's like okay let's go the line extended outside and around the park with the heat in the heat and uh from what people were saying hour and a half long wait oh my god and so we watched some baseball because i was not gonna wait in that um that's tough people love bluey man and so my one event from the night he's into it right yeah yeah we watch probably two to four episodes a day yeah awesome so sat

behind guy that wanted to score the game. Oh, no. He wanted everyone to know about it because he brought his little notepad. Did you tell him you're really sad that you didn't become the producer of his show? Like the electronic notepad thingy? Like you got? Thank you, Danny. The remarkable?

No, this guy, pen and paper. Well played. Old? Man, like 40? Okay. Pretty young. Interesting. But really played the part well. Had a Rough Riders Evan Carter jersey.

Had a Texas flag Crocs. Played the part perfectly. Yeah. And pen and paper. And then at the top left, you know, he writes Naturals versus Rough Riders. Temperature at the start of the game, 98 time of first pitch 606 i mean he was keeping all of it but he did not keep uh the pitch count which i thought if you're gonna do it you need to do it if you're going that far because i was watching him i was like okay mfr you better pay attention to every

pitch and he didn't he was like i'm looking aroundF3, you better pay attention to every pitch. And he did. He was looking around, talking and stuff. I realized he wasn't keeping balls and strikes. He was just keeping the result of the at-bat. Which I thought, you're not doing it the right way. This confirms what I believe about people that score games, that go to games and sit

there with their score pad. They don't want to do it. It's for show. They're just trying to get pussy. That feels like the worst way to try to get pussy of all time. All right. Danny may be onto something because a lot of parents at this game,

it's bluey night. A lot of couples. A guy sits down. He's talking to the couple next to him and it's just bro to bro and he's cursing quite a bit. So scorekeeper man taps him on the shoulder. Hey, we got kids around.

And I thought, like, I was waiting. Are we going to throw down? I was waiting. How great would that be? And the second it took him to respond felt like, you know, a minute and a half because I'm just like, okay, what are we going to do here? Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's like, okay, yeah, sorry. Okay.

And he stopped. But man, scorebook man. I would never do that. He's also local police. Sure. Citizens arrest. Sure. He's there for the people.

Yeah. But I don't know if I would ever stop somebody from cursing in front of my kid. I'm not about that at all. No, I would think you'd have to, if you then want to talk about it later or something, right? You don't. I don't move. I don't know. I'm not going to stand up for the betterment of the crowd, I think.

Yeah. I'm more concerned about my kid cursing in front of other people. Not in front of other adults. Have you dealt with that at all? Oh, yes. Yes. Do you curse in front of your child? No, but he picks things up

because his mom really loves hip hop. Oh, okay. Yeah. So right now his current favorites, and it's only... Cursing is the least of your worries. The N-word. Exactly.

Yeah. You know, right now his current favorites, and he only will do it when he's number one, really angry and trying to get a reaction or if he's trying to get some type of attention. But his top two right now are fuck it and come on, bitch. I've told these guys about this.

At least they're funny. I have cursed in front of Nora probably less than 10 times in my life. My wife has done it quite a bit. It's always the wife. It's always the woman. Always. But there was a time pretty early on.

It might have been two years ago. I think she was three where I started saying, fuck it in front of her. And there's something about like the consternation of it that she just loved. And she would just, and like use it properly, she would just go, fuck it.

Fuck it. There's nothing cuter, by the way. And the only way, you gotta be proud of her for using it properly. I know, but the only way, like Blake talked about this a little bit ago with Brooks, the only way that you can eliminate it is to not react. Yeah, ignore it.

Impossible. But the first few times, I was like, God, that rules. Yeah. Fuck it. I still can't stop laughing at it. No, no. Every time it's funny. Brooks has picked up, damn it, dude.

He'll say that all the time. Well, I have a feeling with NCAA 25 coming back. He's going to learn some new words. Yeah. Oh, man. Yeah. How about... We move on.

Let's... So, on today's program, we do have, we're going to talk a little Trump. Today and Trump. Yeah. Yeah. In fact, we should probably be doing it right now, but I'm pushing, we'll push it ahead till after we take a little break. Okay.

But we will do sports. And today, sports has actually got a sponsor, Frankel and Frankel. Luckily, my daughter, who got in an accident last week, didn't really need to call Frankel and Frankel right away. She called me. But they say you should put in that phone number, like, in your phone, just so that, you know. But if you don't, pretty easy to remember, correct?

Yeah, you just need to remember the number three, Dan. Yeah. They're personal injury attorneys. They're great. They're chosen by the people, feared by the insurance companies because they know the insurance companies, they're not there to help you. They're all great while you're giving them money, but then once you want money from them, then they're like, I don't know.

Well, Frankel & Frankel will fight for you. That's what they do. That is what they do. They're a family-owned law firm with a client-first mission, so you can look forward to superior service and the outcome, not that you want, but that you deserve, Dan. Yeah, you don't want inferior service. No. You want superior. Yes.

So thanks to Frankel and Frankel. You know, it's hard to say, hey, mention the dumb zone. Like, we hope you don't get in an accident. But, I mean, I don't hope that hard that you don't. There's going to be a weird moment. I kind of hope you don't. Where you call them, which you should, at 214-817-333-3333. And you're going to have to say, a podcast called The Dumb Zone sent me here.

That's right. And they'll be like, all right. All right. We'll take extra sweet care of you. I'm a partner. You want to touch on your article first? Jake is a writer of some note. And apparently on dmagazine.com today we've got a new article.

What are we dealing with today? So I would reject the idea that it's of some note. But it is something that we talked about over the last couple of days. And it was something that my editor wanted me to I guess expound on.

I still can't believe that Mark Cuban is not in charge of the Mavs anymore. It's super weird. The Mavericks have been to the finals two of the last three years. He hired a GM who apparently has grown into this job pretty well, right? Like, I think you and I were both

pretty skeptical of that idea as we were with Jason Kidd. And that's the guy that he hired, and now he's just gone? And at the beginning, it was that he sold 60%, and then it was 73% of his shares, and now it's that he's not even in charge anymore at all. Yeah, and at the beginning, they said he was going to retain basketball control. Yeah.

And like, I remember hearing, I don't know if it was a wind horse or maybe it was somebody was saying, yes, he had the control share. Yeah. Which I was very interested in and confused by. Yeah.

But like, so you could only own 20% of the team or whatever, but you have the, like there's one share that says I get to control everybody, and I always get last say. But apparently not. Just because I would think if he still had control share, he'd still be front and center.

But I feel like it started out that way. Like it started out with him saying, I'm selling this part of the team, but I'm still going to be in charge of basketball operations. Doesn't that also, in retrospect, sound like that was the spoonful of sugar to make the medicine go down easier? That's exactly what I wrote today. Oh, you did?

Cool. Just in the sense that it's like they wanted to do it in phases. That's a lot to take in as a lifer Mavs fan, that the guy that you've known is running the organization for 30 years almost is just handing it off to these interlopers from Las Vegas. You attach that to it and get through the phase of, look, we made the finals. We're really, really good and making all these moves. Then you can kind of just slither away and nobody will even notice or care.

That's the way it feels. kind of just slither away and nobody will even notice or care. That's the way it feels. And the weirdest part to me about it is he's been like the most passionate out front owner outside of Jerry like ever. No, I thought he was just like Jerry. And now he's just gone. And it doesn't seem like people are talking about it that much. It just seems like he's just gone.

Like he goes after the officials. He goes after the league. He's on a reality show. He's doing the Dairy Queen bit. He wears the basketball football jersey. I'm never going to be able to let that go. They got cut from the article. Oh, they took it out.

I didn't totally understand that. He's your editor the article. Oh, they took it out. I didn't totally understand that. He's your editor, Tim. No, but... He's making trades. He's driving around trying to convince DeAndre Jordan to stay here or follow through on the deal.

Now he's just gone. It's super, super weird. Yeah, like he's nowhere. Not at all. Like he's not at any press conferences. But if you, he's not at the Western Conference Finals trophy presentation like you said. Yeah, it wasn't even like in the group.

No. Behind the new owner. No. He just kind of sits at the baseline. So he's still got sweet seats. He does still have... I remember trying to... S-W-E-E-T seats, but he's...

But trying to ascertain why. Remember at the time it was, okay, I don't know, did he take a bath on Bitcoin or crypto and that's why he needs cash? Which didn't really make a lot of sense just because he seems stoked on crypto, and guys that are stoked on crypto seem to... Hold. They don't put everything into it.

And yes, then they hold because it always goes up in the long run. At least we hope, those of us who have a Bitcoin. Dan is hoping. in the long run. At least we hope. Those of us who have a Bitcoin. Dan is hoping. And then I remember the thought was,

oh, you know, look at him getting out in front of this. He's getting out in front of the bubble bursting on the NBA TV rights. Those rights are coming up soon. And he knows that it's a bad future for that. He's getting out now. And that way he won't be around as salaries actually go down for the first time. Well, then we've seen that's ridiculous.

Like, I saw the theory. You know, I kind of bought the theory behind it is the ratings just keep going down, down, down. Less and less people watch the finals every year. They're grasping at straws trying to create an in-season tournament and, you know, create excitement in the league. So, yeah, I could see that TV. They're not going to be in next, you know, the networks aren't. And then everybody's bidding against each other and paying more even to have less

because still sports is the thing. You know, it's an innings eater. It's just it gives you programming. Yeah, and my thought about that was just even if financially it made sense for him to move on because I think what he said was basically like that if he sold a specific number of shares, that the real estate and the casino thing is going to make those shares worth more, right? Like the Adelsons are going to build a casino.

So if he now has 27% of the company as opposed to 80% of the company, that 20% will be worth more going forward. As much as 50% would have been in the past. Exactly. And you can get cash flow positive. But the part that I don't understand is relinquishing control of the team. Yeah, that made sense because we would think those people know how to help the laws get changed.

Because that's what needs to be done. Lobby and do what you have to do. Exactly. And they are already big time fans of all the people who are our lawmakers now. And they're very adept at this. Right leaning and they've helped change elsewhere. They happen to be funding the war in Palestine.

Like is there any chance? That's a separate issue, I suppose. Is there any chance that they have... Told him? Yeah, he's not getting what he thought he was getting out of this deal? That crossed my mind. I don't think that anything is off the table. And that he's upset about the way he's been moved to the back?

Well, I mean, he's upset about the way he's been moved to the back i wonder well i mean he's got four billion dollars now yeah so he's upset about it all he wants but i feel like he reveled in yeah i just face of the mavs i've and there's always dirk or there's luca but there's always cuban you know yeah and that's you, not to like just completely repurpose the article that I wrote this morning, but I was not a fan of the Mavericks until Mark Cuban bought the team. I was a fan of the Seattle Supersonics because they had a player with my last name who dunked a lot. Yeah, the man shout.

Yeah. Future Cav. He was a Cavalier then. Father cavalier then father of many father of many yeah some probably unaware but you know when cubes bought the team it was like oh he put him on the map for sure and he kept nelly and he was like a different type of owner, and that's probably why I got into analytics. Dude, he changed the NBA. That's what I'm saying. Just like Jerry changed the NFL.

Yeah. And now he's just gone. Yeah, there would be no owner of the Clippers if Cuban didn't blaze that trail. Has anyone asked him point blank, what do you do now? Well, that's the thing. I don't think he's really been out there in the public. You can text him.

We all have his number. We have to dust him. Cyber dust him, yeah. Okay. I have to dust him. Were you about to say he has done interviews? One interview that I could find where he just said, hey, this is a financial decision that I need to make.

I need to make. Okay. But at that point, he had not relinquished control of the basketball team. This is back in like January. Like when it was first done? Yeah. And now it's just done. And the problem, again again is things have been going

pretty well so maybe he just like came to the realization or the conclusion that this game has passed me by I don't know I mean that seems weird

but it seems super weird I suppose it could be you know I know we've all thought, is he ever going to run for president? I don't think he would be doing this now to clear the decks for that. No.

But who knows? And see, that's the other thing too, is like, this is something we talked about last week a little bit. His politics actually aligned way more with the average NBA player than most billionaires.

And they, again, just sold to the biggest conservative donors in the world. Pretty much the polar opposite of the average NBA player. It could not be more of a left turn. Yeah.

And that's fine. I'm not making a judgment about anybody's politics on that front, but that's pretty weird. Yeah. And it happened, and everyone was just like, oh, yeah, Mark Cuban sold the Mavs. Yeah. If you have a chance to make billions of dollars, I think the politics matters less and less.

Probably so. You know, these same ultra-woke, if you want to call it NBA players. Education reform Morris. They're pretty cool about selling stuff in China. Yeah. Public jerseys. Well, profit is their politics. Of course.

Yeah. And that can take many different shapes. Yeah. Yeah. When they did all the social stuff on the court or on the jerseys, like it's just like corporate sponsors who are excited about Pride Month or whatever. They're doing that because they think that is a profitable move for them in the long run.

They're not doing it because they're stoked on seeing gay rights push forward. They're doing it because I think this will, the population is going in this direction and we should be, let's just pretend we care about gay people for this month. But at the same time, I feel like Cuban actually believes a lot of the stuff that he says.

Yeah. But, again, money is money. I get it. Yeah, I just, it's a weird situation. It's weird to me that it hasn't been a bigger deal. I don't know if it's because the Cowboys are such a big deal that they just chomp up so much

of our sports media consumption. And now we have to talk about Malik Hooker and Micah Parsons. But it's really weird that a guy that you cannot write the story of the last quarter century of Dallas sports without mentioning his name first is just gone.

And we're like, yeah, this kind of falls under the it's just business umbrella where you can be one way socially minded, civically reminded or minded in one direction. And it's like kind of like that, hey, don't take it personally. This is just business. You hear that in business a lot. Don't get your feelings hurt. I had to make this decision. It's just business.

We've heard that. You can still say all of these things about how progressive you think that Cuban is, and he probably is. But when it comes to, I have an opportunity to make X amount of dollars, this is just business. This has nothing to do with what I believe,

but I'm not going to let that stand in the way of me profiting. And I totally get that. Again, the last thing I'll say is I don't know why it's not a bigger deal. Obviously, if Jerry sold, it would be the biggest deal. I thought about that this morning. Maybe that's because there's a family. He's woven his family into

every aspect of the Cowboys. That would be a lot different. Cuban is only one man. Only one man. Maybe he just flat out doesn't want to do it anymore. Maybe. That's really the only thing that I can come up with.

I mean, he's what, 62, 3, 4? Something like that. Yeah. Yeah, it does seem odd, though. You got the next LeBron. Yeah. And I want to step away. I could see if they were kind of

floundering yeah just like if they were Atlanta or five years ago or most other teams like yeah don't really know your path to to the top but no it's we're three years removed from him talking about like the kid hire like it was something that, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, The highly unnecessarily edited D Magazine article by Jake Kemp. That's right. You need that thing about the Cuban jersey. Yeah, unbelievable. I just think the jersey's funny. It is.

It's a basketball jersey on a football jersey. The reference was lost on your editor. Red Lion. What do we got on the River Seine? That is what we're here to talk about Okay That's been the story we've followed The Olympics opening ceremony is Friday And it will be on the River Seine

Seine, okay I believe it's Seine Hey look, it's Kevin Pelton Jesus Christ, Turn off the TV. So we've been talking about the fact that the River Seine is a nasty place. Very polluted. Yet they are going to use it for some Olympic events. And they're having the opening ceremonies on the river.

With apparently, they say no plan B. So I don't know what that exactly means. I guess they just don't have a ceremony. Oh, I thought it meant they're not handing out pills. Yeah, well maybe that is it. I like that. Maybe that is it. Which would make

more sense. My joke is not as good, but I was just going to say, having no plan B, in my experience, not great. In both experiences. Very poor. Both ways. Exactly. There you go. So, the president of France, Macron, and the mayor of Paris had both said they were going to take a swim to prove that this river is not toxic.

Because it's literally filled, I mean, it's a wastewater dump off. If the rain gets too high, they will divert the sewage system to dump into the river. Most recent tests show that it is 3.5% diarrhea. Yeah. Little chunks are in the... It's gross. It's a gross river. Chunks.

So... Chunks. So what they did is they spent $1.5 billion for a... To create like a large... Like if there is the rainfall that would... Anyway, they can... It's kind of like they just built a new big tank or something. And that's where the sewage will now go.

I heard they were just going to plug in a giant pool cleaner to clean up the river. Yeah, one of the Polaris. Yeah, they just got a giant Polaris going through the river. It's a big Polaris. Is that that thing that floats around and scares the shit out of kids? Yeah, it's going back and forth along the bottom of the... Oh, damn, it's stuck.

The river. Anyway, the mayor keeps pushing back her date. She has not swam yet. Oh, no. She keeps giving a date. That's her problem. The French sports minister, though, did take a swim over the weekend. And did not disintegrate.

Okay. So apparently the French sports, they're trying to like, they have to have some public official swim in it to say, yeah, it is safe. Because everybody's like, I don't think that'll be safe. They're like, yeah, yeah, it will be.

Well, we'll swim in it. When? They just found like the lowest person that could take one for the team. Yes, the sports minister. What the hell is that? Doesn't feel like a high level official, Dan. Swimming in the Seine,

if you just want to know how dirty it is, it's been banned since 1923. Do you know how bad things have to be for 100 years ago for people to be like, not safe? Right. Because they were doing anything back then. Yeah. Yeah. Right?

Walking the tightrope across Niagara Falls. We literally had the goddamn plague. They were telling people, all right, if your baby is getting out of control, shake it. It'll be fine. But don't get in that river. Are you pregnant? Yeah, you can keep smoking. Yeah, it'll be fine. They didn't have little

microbial testing probably back then. No, I think they just looked at it based on the eye test. They just looked at it and smelled it. They were like, uh-uh, not so good. And now today they're like, what if we put the mayor in there? Okay, so you say it was like the lowest possible public official to jump in, the sports minister?

Seems pretty low, yeah. She was accompanied by the Paralympic flag bearer for France. Oh no, they put a crippled in there? Well, I don't know that that's the way we term it, but Is that out of bounds now? Let's see here.

Now, part of the Okay, disabled person? They put a disabled person? They put a disabled person... How about you just let the things roll, and who cares if it's out of bounds? It's fine. Well, she was looking at me. Oh, okay.

Well, she's looking at you. Well, then you should probably change the whole show. So they put a disabled person... I didn't realize somebody was looking at us. They put a disabled person in a shit-filled river, is what you're telling me. Well, so they have tried to clean it up.

Okay. They built this other little thing. One and a half billion dollars. But there is a group of protesters that have been standing by. They're waiting

for the day the mayor keeps saying she's going to swim in the river. And they're trying to get a protest together to where all these people,

so she's going to swim in the river, let's say by the Eiffel Tower. They're going to go upstream, time it out, and they're trying to get thousands of people to drop their pants and drop a deuce in the river so that it will all be floating by at the same time of the mayor's swim. It hits her at once.

They've timed it all. And they're like an app. I think they created some type of app where you can... Okay, you've seen this? At a specific time, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I feel like John Oliver did something on this. Maybe, I don't know.

Yeah, they're waiting. Like, are they not convinced that the shit is... The turd floats at 2.1 miles an hour. Right, right, right, right. And from 400 kilometers- It weighs an average of- Right? They figured out all the science.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. On a wind, it will actually hit her in the head. But I feel like that's dishonest, though, because aren't they- She's just ducking them all. Aren't they already saying that we feel like there's too much shit in here? Yeah. So why do we need to put more poop? Because that's fun.

I guess it's fun. Aren't they Olympics protesters? Yeah, they're protesting the fact that they spent $1.5 billion on that and not like... Okay, so they want to undo it. You know, do you think we have no homeless people now? Well, actually, you're going to think they have no homeless people because we've swept them all away for the whole thing.

The Olympics sucks. It's terrible like what it does to cities and what cities do to suck off the olympics to get it at their host location and the way they position their city is just these oh it's so beautiful and pristine and clean and then when the olympics go away it's back to even worse than it was before. Yeah. And, you know, your taxes have to pay for it. It's not a great thing. I mean, the sports side of it's cool. It's just what it

does to the infrastructure. I mean, yeah, I guess. It depends. I like watching some of it, but is it worth like a rapacious siege on a city? Probably not. I mean, obviously it is for profit.

I don't think it is for profit. Isn't it though? I don't think the Olympics are like a loss leader at all. I think that people, countries generally lose a lot of money by having the Olympics. Am I crazy about this? I mean, certainly there's some... I think it's like a national pride thing,

but I don't think that it actually makes countries money. It sure gives me pride when I see one of our guys like shave a world record from 4.23 seconds to 4.22. I'm like, oh my gosh. You stand up and cry and put your hand over your heart? I do like seeing the basketball team kick the crap out of everyone. That's kind of fun.

I do know you like that. And I do want to see LeBron get another championship. I mean, that's really what this is all about. Joel and Bede. Although, you know what? They did mess up with no Caitlin Clark. Do you know how much I care about the WNBA now? Like, kind of.

That's how much. Kind of. But I am really amused by, like, did you see clips over the weekend of, who's Caitlin Clark's nemesis? Angel Reese. Okay. Like, apparently she had, like, the WNBA record for double doubles in a row. With four.

It's like 15. Four. I think saying 15, to me, has the same effect. Like, that doesn't, really? Like, I would think. However. Look up the NBA's record. Okay.

It feels like it should be a lot longer. They play fewer minutes. However, I'm going to tell you the numbers were almost all 10 and 10. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So the other night

they had, I don't know, their team was playing another team. I don't know any of the teams. Yeah. But apparently she had nine points

and there's like a minute left. They're losing by 20 and they are just feeding her. And it's really funny. There's four girls covering her and everyone else is wide open and she wouldn't pass it. Love that.

And she just keeps getting blocked and rejected and firing up like is awesome. Just they did all this to prevent her double-double. Right, to prevent the double-double streak from continuing. I think she had already tied the record maybe. I don't know.

I know she was going for the record. I don't really care, but I'm amused by – and certainly no one's going to care about her either if she wasn't Kaitlyn Clark's nemesis. Yeah. And I love it. And I would watch a little basketball in the Olympics of the ladies

if indeed Caitlin Clark was on the team, but she's not. I think I would be interested to watch it if they had to play together. Yeah. That'd be interesting. Yeah. But, I mean, the biggest thing is,

and we've talked about this a little bit, is just it's turned into a culture war. Like, I don't care about caitlin clark or angel reese no i don't care about i like that caitlin clark's jacking up logo threes that's fun yeah no it's a it's a fun style of basketball and i like that angel reese is an aggressive player or whatever but the fact that it's turned into this, like, can we fight about black and white people? I don't know, man. Well, that's just a fun part of our culture altogether.

I guess it is. It's the fun part, Jake. Yeah. It's just, you know. And the weird thing is, I don't think either one of them want anything to do with it. Yeah, Angel seems to enjoy it. Angel might want a little bit to do with it. She's not getting a shoe deal without that but I

it doesn't seem to me like Caitlin Clark wants anything to do with like being a proxy for race war but I could be wrong about that I don't know I want to be a proxy for race war how can I do that

I would say if you said the N-word right now. That would make me a proxy? You could probably get there. I appreciate the advice. I'll think about that a little bit. I'm just telling you. He said he's going to consider it.

Maybe in the news. What more do you want? Let's do this real quick. Viewer mail, then we'll take a little break. Okay. Then we'll do pre-news, then we'll do news. Then we'll do closing middle remarks. Something.

Let's see. I got a bunch of birthdays. Actually, Mark Brasher says he reached the Wilford Brimley cocoon line. Are you familiar with this? I'm familiar with the Twitter account. I don't know the age off the top of my head. Danny, do you? I think it's 53, 52, something like that. It's insane.

So it's, the bit is that he says, I'm the same age today as Wilford Brimley was on the day Cocoon was released in theaters, which is 50 years, 9 months, and 6 days. And apparently if you take a look at Wilford Brimley, He looks 90. It's unbelievable.

Yeah. And I think, you know, this has been a bit we've been on for a long time that people looked older back then. And, yes, so Mark wanted to note that he's been following his days and counted it down to that. Mrs. Dan's ladies' nights and TC's masturbation-induced back spasms from day one, number 211. 211, Mark Brasher. Danny, TC seized up while yurking it. And he admitted to this when and where? He told me about it on a companion podcast that I do.

Uh-huh. Yeah. He had a back spasm. This was recently. Now there's an older woman here. Jake? Not older. Older than you.

Very attractive, but the second we started talking about jacking off, another woman walked in here. Don't change what you do because someone's looking at you. Right, Dan? Tell him, don't change what you do because someone's looking at you. Okay. Right, Dan? I won't.

Tell him, Dan. But what do you think that is? Do you think it's like just nutrition? Less smoking? Yeah, I don't know. Obviously, in Hollywood, you're all Botoxed up and you've got ways to make you

keep looking younger, I suppose. But I think the average person looks better now. Yeah. We're probably not out in the sun as much. That's a big one. I don't think Wilford Brimley at that time was doing a lot to help himself either. I don't think he really cared. Yeah, smoking, nutrition, exercise, whatever.

Weird glasses. Mustache. Why would that be? Drinking. Why would mustache be? Dan, i completely dropped the ball last week friday was sarah's 15th birthday she and her mom laura loved you and jake on the ticket they now listen to the dumb zone faithfully uh sarah and sausalito maybe you remember back in the day, David and East Dallas here used to always send in her birthday. Her and her mom listened to us from California.

You ever been to Sausalito? Sarah and Sausalito. I don't even know where it is. Is it by San Francisco? It is. Okay. It's like the most amazing place in America. Whoa.

It's like the Highland Park of the world. Okay. Well, then we want to remain friends with Sarah in Sausalito. Can't argue with that. And her mom. Uncle Hotmail. Sunday, my good friend and fellow D.F.er

John Mooring's Alfred Morris birthday. Alfred. His leaders are Danny the Autism Comic and The Last 10%. More Julie from Preston Blevins, number 2246. Do you have any more jokes about my daughter being on the spectrum? No, not today. Got a couple, workshopping a couple.

I just wanted to know. No, no, you're good. If there was anything else you wanted to add. We're fine, Jake. It is funny. I mean, I got to give you that. No, no, you're good. If there was anything else you wanted to... No, we're fine, Jake. Okay. It is funny. I mean, I got to give you that. I got to give you that. Nobody loves autism comedy more than Dan.

It's hard to not joke about it. Uncle Hotmail, I'm Jeff Moss. Hi, Jeff. Pronounced Jeff Moss. His name is spelled G-E-O, and he wrote J. Anyway. It is my Kareem Abdul-Jabbar birthday. I hope alongside a birthday shout-out,

you will call out my brother to host a 960 remote. They are currently in Africa. They're building a 10,000-square-foot mansion, and blah, blah, blah. Anyway, he's saying... I thought he was in Africa maybe doing some missionary work. Well, no, no, no.

He's shooting lions, hippos, crocodiles, leopards, etc. Yeah. But he's saying that he's building a huge mansion here and they could easily fit us in. Okay. So that's the bit.

My leaders are the young grandpa's new wife who loves porn. Is that the guy who's driving us? I think so. Oh yeah. Matt? Yeah, you want to fire it up? It's Matt. Matt is going to join us on

Wednesday to talk about our trip to California. Jake's weed vape and Blake's MBR. Let's see. He says, that's it, Jeff. It's his birthday, right? Jeff Moss. And then I got a couple of Jake-related emails. I can't read.

It's okay. One says, hey, Dan, Jake's pitching coach is pitching to Bobby Witt Jr. in the home run derby tonight. Whoa. It is true. Seems like he's trying to bury the lead here. You're still doing that? From Taylor.

Shut up. Are you really? Yeah, I am. But, I mean, we've had, like, a bit of an uneven schedule. So, like, obviously we're doing a show on Wednesday. So, I won't be able to go on Wednesday. But they are friends. He's already putting the plane in.

Oh, he's already backing out. That ain't a consistent schedule. I didn't get to... What was the end goal? What is the goal? Then I won't do the show on Wednesday. Doing pitching lessons. What is the end result?

What's your goal? I just wanted to learn how to throw a baseball. You gave up piano lessons that is actually useful, that you can learn and it would serve you the rest of your life, but you want to learn to throw a baseball. Yeah.

And that's somehow going to— I want to learn how to do both of them. I want to learn how to do all of this. And we've already talked about it. Next, we're going to teach him how to run to first. Which way do I go? Next, let's learn how to shoot a free throw. I just don't get it.

Yeah. No, I think Bobby is throwing that. Not Bobby, James. James Russell is throwing to Bobby at the Home Run Derby. This one will end with Jake talk. He says, I'm typing laughing my ass off that Aggie hater Jake got pulled over. And then he goes on to tell

me this was regarding my daughter was in an accident last Thursday evening. She was run into and it was pretty obvious cut and dried. It was an old lady and the cop knew, you know, she created, the other lady two violations so definitely

their insurance and all that kind of stuff. 2-1-4 all threes. Or 8-1-7. His idea is get a basic dash cam. $50 on Amazon. It saved us thousands of dollars twice. I've thought about this actually. He's got a couple of stories where his kids were actually hit.

And there was some ambiguity about whether or not whose fault it was. And it was, oh, it was clearly the dash cam saved him. Yeah. Yeah. I put a dash cam on about a year ago. Do you have it facing out or at you? Why would it be facing at him? At your pants.

Yeah. I'd tune into that, dude. Just to find out the exact second where you got back. Twitch.tv slash Blake. Pant can.

Blake's junk. Blake's hog. So I've heard. Have a nice tollway wank. Blake looks like he's got a hog, doesn't he? Blake, you know, I'm just saying, you look at Blake and you're like, I'm pointing my dash cam out. So I've heard. Have a nice tollway wank. Blake looks like he's got a hog, doesn't he? I don't have to talk about that. I'm just saying, you look at Blake and you're like, I'm pointing my dash cam out to see

if I get in an accident that's not my fault. I'm looking at Danny. I'm seeing long and skinny. I think your body type generally... What do I got? I think Blake's either... Hairy. I think it's either feast or famine with Blake.

Hairy. Hairy, spiked. I think Blake's either... Harry. I think it's either feast or famine with Blake. Harry. Harry spiked. I think Blake is either you can't see it or it's like halfway down his leg. That's what I'm feeling. Or thinking, not feeling it. But it's strong. You could hang up a... What about you, Dan? What kind of luggage are you toting around?

A little chewed up piece of gum. Stick to the... You stick under the desk. A little big red McDowell over there. Yeah. Oh, anyway, this is from Kurt who says, gig him and tell Jake to unblock me on X. Got it.

Give me the handle. And I told him, email me the handle and Jake shall do that. I will do that. Because that's what we're doing now. If you're a listener, unblocked. Yeah, if you want to be unblocked by Jake, he is accepting that and we will do a little ceremony right here on the air. A little seance, yeah. If you're in radio middle management, you're still blocked.

And hello, my leader. I have a question for Jake. First, you're still blocked. And hello, my leader. I have a question for Jake. First, congratulations on 500 plus. You heard me. My question is, out of all the Kemp spins, which one is his favorite? Then he goes on to tell his personal favorite. Which is?

But do you want me to tell you that or want to just get Jake's unsolicited? We'll give him a second to think. But yeah, I'm interested in this, guys. He says, my personal favorite is the Craig Sager one. Yeah. I feel bad for his son who was filling in for his dad while he was on his deathbed. And every time he interviewed someone, they kept telling him how great of a person his dad was. Then he says, more Danny intros from Z Shroff. Sorry, I didn't play the Danny Intro.

Do you have your favorite Kemp Spin? Yeah, I'll give you two of them. I mean, Craig Sager's definitely up there. It's very hard for me to overcome wide stance. And I know that that's one that you bring up a lot, but Larry Craig being in the Minneapolis airport like putting his foot under

the stall trying to hook up with a dude that's just that's really really good a lawmaker who was anti-gay rights and stuff? Of course yeah he was a conservative that's a chef's kiss.

Yeah, for sure. Then the other one, because of our personal connection to it, is Susie Favor Hamilton. So the fact that Norm had— The Olympian who became a prostitute. Yes. And Bob grew up kind of worshipping her because I think she was from Madison

and she was like America's sweetheart. And then Norm had her on after she had already become an escort and asked her some questions that I don't think you should ask a woman regardless of their history. Did he know at the time that she had pivoted?

She wrote a book about it. Oh, okay. So you were a prostitute. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. It was great. We broke it down, I think. She got addicted to sex.

As one will, Blake. And then he had her on, and he was like, how many at once? And it was just real sincere. And honestly, she was super, super upfront and honest about it. How many cucks in the room was it for? It wasn't that far off from what you're saying.

Seven. And then Donovan was like uh what was the toughest race you ever ran like when i found the audio i hit up donovan and i'm like dude what were you doing he's like i'm super super sorry about this so that that that would probably have to be my top two. And she was also, like, incredibly attractive. So, yeah. That's my top two. All right. I saw you do a joke about Donald Trump getting shot.

All right. Of all the presidents, I think it's fair to say Donald Trump would be the funniest one to see get got. Just because he'd be in the middle of a speech talking shit. You're gay! The shooter would be coming at him and be like, sit down, get down. What a loser, get down, sit down. The noise he would make when he got hit.

Even if he loved Donald Trump it would be funny as soon as he got hit the rest of the joke which is my favorite part that didn't really a lot of people didn't like it was uh I think Biden's the joke, which is my favorite part, that didn't really... A lot of people didn't like it. I think Biden's the first president you could punch and assassinate. You're listening to The Dumb Zone. Wasn't that like a formula? The husband who's a little bit overweight.

Yeah. Wife is too hot for him. If there was a list of top ten shows that kind of was based on the Moonshiners, I think King of Queens would be one. The Moonshiners? Do you mean the... Moon... Honeymooners?

Moonshiners? Is it the Honeymooners? No, puppet! It's the Honeymooners. Wasn't that fun? It was fun. So now I'm distracted by the TV. I told Jake to take a look at it.

So we're watching ESPN now. Yeah. We're at Mortgage Mark's place, by the way. I could live here. It's beautiful. Yeah. And you're not even homeless. No, I'm not.

We've wanted Mark and Caroline to adopt us for quite some time now ever since we met them. Yeah. So, it's Windhorst on ESPN.

The reason I wanted to point this out is like we're trying hard. We're failing, but we're trying hard. We're trying to get good equipment and microphones and headsets, and we're just trying to make this thing look professional.

This is ESPN, the multi-billion dollar corporate. And Windhorse is like their guy. And he's on camera with AirPods or earbuds and the wire, and he's just sitting there talking to his computer. If you're Brian Windhorst, Mortgage Mark has a beautiful video podcast studio set up. If you're Windhorst, buy that camera. You got a seat back there.

Now you just sit there. You have actual, I don't know. This looks so cheap. Yeah. You can actually see, in this case, it's a shot of Kevin Pelton. This is like April 2020. And I can see his hotel microwave, which is embarrassing. And his built-in MacBook cam facing angled up so you can see his extra chin.

And from the shot of Windhorst, I can see his ceiling fan, which is highly distracting. I thought you were going to say, he's lost a little weight. He doesn't look bad. He doesn't look bad. Because for a long time, I had a tremendous amount of respect for him for being so famous and so fucking fat. Yes, because anybody else in that position on TV every day would... Yeah, you're like, okay, I have to lose weight. That's the public pressure that's on me.

Right. And for a long time, he was like, what if I just got bigger? Yeah, that's probably easier. More fun. I would say it's certainly a lot easier but right now he actually looks a little bit thinner and I don't love it and I can see a ceiling fan so so next on the run sheet we have a run sheet we don't just totally wing it no it just seems that way man man. These guys are just off the cuff. So loose, man. Ooh, you know what?

We never did mention. Moment of silence for Monty Kiffin. He died last week. Did you guys see that? Oh, we did? Yeah. I did see that. That was a—

Former Cowboy defensive coordinator. What, for one year? Yes. It was a weird time, as I recall. It was a very weird time. They were like, what if we wanted to also hire your son? Did they?

Was Lane not like a brief consultant or something? I don't know. I don't remember that. I guess he was just like associated with Rod Marinelli. Yeah, Monty Kiffin was. Yeah, yeah.

Like he was his mentor. Yeah, yeah. So randomly Monty Kiffin was associated with the Cowboys. Dude, that was a – we had like a five-year run that was so weird. Rob Ryan? Yeah. That was great. I. That was great. I guess it was great.

Today and Trump. Yeah. Is what we get to now. Yeah. And I feel like my headline from this, the Trump shooting over the weekend, is kind of like what we've done today is indicative. I mean, just the fact that... We're mirroring the national conversation, right?

Like we didn't leave with it. It feels like it happened and then it's like, oh yeah, that was a story the other day. Yeah. But what about the River Seine? And Caitlin Clare, like you've just kind of moved on real quick. I feel like growing up, that would have been the biggest story and everybody would always be talking about it. You've just kind of moved on real quick. I feel like growing up, that would have been the biggest story,

and everybody would always be talking about it. I swear to God, I'm not positive my wife knows to this second that it happened. I told my mom about it. I was telling you this morning. I told my mom about it last night, and it happened on Saturday. Yeah. I'm serious, though. My wife, unless she has watched the recording of the Today Show news,

because she will just sit there. She's on Dexter right now. I think she started Dexter Friday. She's on like season three now. First time? She's never done Dexter yet. No, no, no. She's like,

why'd you tell me this was good? It's so great. She's watching Dexter morning, noon, and night. I envy her. But that's the way we watch TV too, is we don't scroll. We don't fire up the news.

We just watch what we plan to watch. Sure. And there's no real sporting events on. I didn't watch any all-star stuff yet. Did you guys? I watched Dude Perfect ground out. Did you watch Dude Perfect play a little softball, celebrity softball or whatever they do?

When? Why? I don't know. I mean, it was sent to us a lot. Yeah. Kobe, Cody, Coley. They're the future. In fact, if you want to make this a politics segment.

And here's the thing. He grounded out to Kane Brown, who was once hired to play the halftime show by Charlotte Jones. Kane Brown's on the list. Kemp's been? Yeah. He once got lost on his own property. He did.

Started tweeting about it. And that's weird? I would think so. Yeah, you get lost on your own property and need help. I worked with a guy that, you know. Well, yeah, that was weird on your own property and need help. I worked with a guy that, you know, might have happened to you. Well, yeah, that was weird because that was like a quarter acre. But, you know. I think Kane Brown was on probably 100, but yeah.

Yeah. So, anyway, that's, I mean, I don't know. What was your, in fact, so Blake texted us. Yeah. Saturday. And if I am to look at my Jake and Blake text us. Yeah. Saturday. And if I am to look at my Jake and Blake text thread. Which is a rarity.

I don't text you guys very often. Well, I mean, it's often very show related. Blake texted us and it says, could you imagine if they killed him? This was Saturday at 546. That is honestly how I found out about this. Well, I thought, is he talking about, we had been on a text thread earlier that week, and it was about like you were texting about some guy who had a snake at his house or something. And I was like, is he talking, are we going back to the snake talk?

And then Jake said, I can imagine it. They can't imagine it. And I thought, you know what, now I don't think I should jump in. I was going to jump in and go, what is this referring to? Is it the snake? And then, so a couple hours go by, and I wasn't really locked into Twitter, I guess. That was probably around Saturday dinner time so now we're having dinner and we're watching a previously you know a show that has not been released in a decade or something you know that's the way we watch our TV so now

I didn't know until that night kind of when I just I'm'm going to fire up my phone, let's take a look at Twitter, and I'm like, oh, Blake was texting that Trump was shot. And then, of course, following it all on Twitter is an interesting ride as well in today's day and age. To, you know, speculation, who was it, this and that. I wanted to ask you guys that when we came in today, does it feel like this should be a bigger deal than it is?

And if it's not a bigger deal than it is, why? Is it because of who he is or because he was just grazed? I think part of it is just the media culture that we're in. Everything moves so fast, and you just kind of move on from things. I would be very interested to see what history books are going to look like in 2050. Because previously, there was one thing that happened per year. Yeah. So it's like, oh, well, and this year, this is what happened.

Yeah. Or maybe once. Well, they still boil it down to because things just get lost over time. Exactly. That's kind of what I'm saying. Yeah. I think if he had like taken a bullet and lived and had to get surgery and big emergency situation, I think it would be a much bigger deal than getting grazed in the ear.

The crazy part about that is you're one inch away from that becoming like the biggest story in the last 100 years of American history. biggest story in the last 100 years of American history. But since I... I'm just trying to see if that's hyperbole. A little bit, maybe. Kennedy was a pretty big deal.

Yeah, but I mean, right now, though, a guy who's running for president a second time after he's already been president and everything feels like this... Now we'd be arguing over little things. Tender box. Tempestuous situation. It would be up there.

Yeah. Yeah. So I'm following it online and now I'm like, oh, okay. Somebody's saying, oh, no, it doesn't. It was glass. Yeah. They shot the teleprompter. And it was glass that hit him and cut him.

And then it's... Okay, so... Will we ever know? I will tell you this. As I showed my mom this, and I told you this this morning, she immediately was like, this is fake. Now, is she pro-Trump or anti? I would say she's pro-conservative, anti-Trump.

Okay. And there's a lot of people like that that will still vote for Trump, though. I don't think she would vote for Trump, but I understand what you're saying. Yeah, yeah. But I think she is a religious person who shares a lot of the values of the Republican Party, who also hates him. Yeah, okay. But I showed it to her last night and she's like,

that's not real. I mean, it looks. The second I showed it to her, I'm like, mom, what are you saying? That was the initial conjecture that was all over

the social media sites pretty much immediately after it happened. And I don't, maybe tell the family of the fireman that died or that it wasn't real that it was fake or the two other people who got wounded like seriously wounded or yeah this was put on by Trump hey shoot my ear that's a pretty big risk take my ear Jesus can you be the greatest

marksman of all time despite the the fact that we've now heard reports that he was kicked out of his rifle club in high school because he was such a terrible marksman? The 20-year-old? Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. I just think people's brains are just so cooked.

Yeah. And it's, you know, obviously there are people that would be yelling that a whole school shooting was all faked somehow. And there was actors. Like, let me just say, it's the greatest live production ever if that was somehow faked

because it looks like a Hollywood production. Like, is that real? Like, did he really then just pump his fist and the flag is behind him? And it's like, this is a campaign photo for sure. I mean, the first thing you must have thought is, well, there is the next president. There's just no way around that. Unless Biden somehow skydives without a parachute and I don't know what he... Tackles Bodhi.

It's kind of like if Biden can walk up the stairs without tripping, then we're going to be like, yes, oh yes, there's his thing. He didn't fall off a bike. Yeah. He rode 10 whole feet. I don't know what else to say about it other than, I mean, obviously, I can't stand the guy. I can't stand his politics. But that was like the most baller thing I've ever seen in my life.

Yeah, it was like badass. Have you seen some of the memes? Fight, fight. Fight. As he just gets clipped in public with an you see like guys who used to be uh secret service guys or people like no way if it was real you don't let him expose his body then after that and and uh you know there could be another shooter how do you know there's not another you know blah blah blah he's a big dude i mean that was the problem with like the female secret

or secret service right she only came up to like his nipple how are you going to protect him if He's a big dude. I mean, that was the problem with the female Secret Service, right? She only came up to his nipple. How are you going to protect him if you're that short? Beautiful nipple. It was badass, though. Part of the conspiracy theories is also that they had secured a number of rooftops around there. Right. Except for that one.

Well, and did you see the video where people saw him crawling on there? Yes. You could see Right. Except for that one. Well, and did you see the video where people saw him crawling on there? Yes. You could see him. There's that guy. And he's like pointing. They're like, hey, there's a guy with a rifle right there.

Yeah. And it was clearly not a uniformed guy. How did that happen? What I understand is the perimeter that he fell outside of the Secret Service perimeter and anything beyond that was supposed to be local police. Yeah. And they are the ones.

And, of course, you're going to get a lot of pass the buck and not my fault after something like this. I'm also not like, I'm not taking shots at local police, but those people are not the Secret Service. Yeah. They're not used to this. They're not trained in that way. Right. They're going to have some gaps in their coverage, but at the same time, it was a pretty small area.

And I'll tell you, the Secret Service isn't perfect. No. I mean, we forget that, wasn't Gerald Ford shot twice? Isn't that? Is that true? I don't know. I think there was an attempt on Gerald Ford shot twice? Isn't that? Is that true? I don't know. I think there was an attempt on Gerald Ford's life two times. Yeah, I guess the only thing I would think about that is that.

Reagan was shot. It is a bygone era. Like despite the fact that there are more school shootings. Yeah, yeah. It's just because you think they've kind of eliminated the possibility that you could get a rifle into somewhere. Yeah, and I think also those people, like their tactical presence is highly, highly increased from what it was 30, 40 years ago. I mean, on one hand, you have, like, tracking your phone,

tracking the internet, all that sort of stuff. But I also just think, you know, I mean, the Secret Service used to smoke cigarettes. Okay. Now they're, like, trained killers. So I don't think this is, like, because I've seen a lot of like talk about that of like, is this going to become like a common thing?

I don't think it will. I don't think so either, but I do think the story is that it's not the big story that we think it should be. Yeah, I agree. Like you're not really, you didn't wake up thinking about it.

Like, Oh, I can't believe, you know, it's, it's, it's just kind of like, and it's probably part of it is who he is because something different is happening with him every five minutes.

Yeah. And like now it's like, okay, it's this thing. Yeah. Okay. It's this thing. Oh,

he got shot. It's like, Oh, even though it's a much bigger thing, there's always something. And it's just weird. Yes, like you said, too. If he had a bullet embedded in him that they had to get out.

But, you know, you haven't really heard much follow-up on it either. I mean, all of the, yeah, other than the cool fist in the air picture, all the other still photographs, it's kind of you equate it to like when Fabio got hit by a bird on the road. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We were kind of reacting the same way. An inordinate amount of blood.

It's like, oh, okay. I think the Fabio thing had more lifespan. Maybe. More legs. Yeah, like you were talking about that for weeks. Do you have any interest in the story of the guy, the shooter? I mean, there's going to obviously peel back all the layers of who he was and how he got to be who he is.

And even those things, as far as politicizing this, which is those gears started spinning immediately. Yeah. this which is those gears started spinning immediately yeah there there's a a confliction in that that he was a registered republican but he also donated 15 to a democratic progressive organization i guess yeah like activate blue or something like that yeah so you don't really know where he falls and it what will end up happening the truth i think the truth will be that this was just a very troubled person seeking attention this wasn't about but as are all of these he wasn't some real political operative most of the shootings most of them most all of them yeah but know, had this been a Hispanic guy, an illegal or whatever,

that would be blown to giant proportions. Or a proven hardcore left-leaning, left-wing type person that was on an operative mission to take out, this is the only way we can keep this guy out of office. They're thinking that that was what his line of thinking was. But now it's like, well, there's a kind of dichotomy within his identity and what he actually stood for. And he was probably just crazy. Like the guy that went to baseball practice, Dan.

Yeah. What about the thought that it could be an inside job somehow within our government? Yeah, I don't know. I mean, like I said, don't you? What about the thought that it could be an inside job somehow within our government? Yeah, I don't know. I mean, like I said, don't you? Who would even think that? You know what?

I think I'll go to a rally and I'll be able to find an open building that I can climb up on. Like, I don't know. Especially if it's an inside operative, you're going to hire a 20-year-old with zero military experience. I would not think so. Yeah, that doesn't seem like a great idea. Using a rifle that's probably at that distance. That is not an accurate rifle. Yeah, it's not designed for that type of accuracy. It's a close-range rifle.

I'm shocked. If that was, in fact, the bullet that clipped the Don's ear, pretty accurate, honestly. That's a. 308 job. You see the diagrams. If Trump had not looked right the second before, it hits him in the head, and he's dead. I can't wait to see all of the scientific

post-event trajectory analysis and all of that. That's going to be interesting. Where was the sniper that got him, the Secret Service sniper? Where was he positioned? I'm curious to know all of that. That's going to be interesting. Where was the sniper that got him? The Secret Service sniper? Where was he positioned? I'm curious. I want to know all about that. What's that? There's an alternate angle. You can see the sniper behind him. Right before Trump gets shot, he's like,

we got to take this shot. It's a crazy timeline. He takes three seconds, which I heard everybody getting on this guy about it. In reality, you have which I heard everybody like getting on this guy about it. But I mean, in reality you have to like be positive what you're doing before you fire that shot. Yeah.

I understand that. It's like, you might need approval too. You might need approval. You might need someone in your ear to tell you like, squeeze it. But it took about three seconds, and in those three seconds, the funniest thing that's ever happened in my life happened,

and then a guy got his head popped. God, Twitter's such a bad place after stuff like this. Oh, my gosh. Bad? I think it's the best for comedy. Yeah, I mean, Yeah, I guess. But the first tweet I read after the shooting was, they've identified the shooter.

He's Tim Hardaway Jr. Just a little bit off in the finals. 0 for 10. Just right there. What a different world we live in. A former president. There was an assassination attempt. The future informer.

Somehow able to make it about the finals. But also, it used to be taboo. THJ jokes. But Jake, you'd get in trouble for making a joke about 9-11 two days after 9-11. And now you're two minutes after. Yeah. I will say this, though. We're getting the skits up. The skits! Yeah. Did you see the... Black Twitter?

The black people? Yeah, like, they did a recreation of it. It's incredible. It was out immediately. Ketchup skit? Yeah, within an hour, it seemed like. Well, of me discovering it. Within a couple hours. Sorry. I will say, though, I do hour, it seemed like. Well, of me discovering it. Within a couple hours. Sorry. I will say, though, I do think that it's still the case that you can get in trouble if you pop off on the internet. Oh, from wherever you can get in trouble from.

Yeah. Well... Not just as a human, though. I don't just mean, like, your job. I mean, like, the government. Oh, really? Okay. I think you should not make jokes about this.

That's my PSA today. All right. Well. Despite the fact that. I say do what you want. I think you can be satirical about it, Jake. You know, I think you can use satire, but you can't like endorse it or say. Yeah, I think.

I don't want to say it. There are probably going to be some people that regret tweets or Facebook posts or Instagram posts that they've made over the last couple of days. Did you see Biden had a speech and he said, we should solve our problems at the battle box? With battle bots? I think it was with battle bots. I love it. Which would be great.

So one of them has a saw on it. The other one has a big hammer that goes up and down. I love it. Which would be great. So one of them has a saw on it. The other one has a big hammer that goes up and down. Yep. He can't talk. Alright, well that was pre-news. I wanted to mention this. No, you're fine.

It made me think about the time that TC, our friend, staunch liberal. TC, our friend, not TC Broadnax. I just want to make sure you're separating. Not TC Broadnax, the former city manager. No, TC, the guy that jacks off and throws out his back. That's true.

He's aforementioned. I'm not saying that Broadnax hasn't done that, but I don't know about it. We just don't know. Right. Yeah. But he did vote for- Probably has, but we don't know about it.

But he did vote for Donald Trump in the Republican primary. To make him win, or to help make him win. He thought that he was a more defeatable candidate, so he registered as a Republican. Okay, so it is done. Brilliant. My point is just that this does happen. Okay.

And if TC ends up in the news, then this is probably going to be something that they mention. And he is the kind of guy that would register and then donate merely $15. And also miss. So both things that he did, right, three things that he did all really were pretty meaningless. Or perhaps if indeed that was his goal,

was to the rise of the Democrats, he did the exact opposite. Yeah. Yeah. Here's Jay with the Dumb Zone News. Very bad news for Dan as the Hooters on North Lamar caught on fire. Oh, yeah? Oh, no. Yeah.

Wait, is that ours? Yeah. The West End Hooters? I believe so. Oh, no. Yeah, this morning. Oh, no. Is it from being awesome?

From having awesome food? I think the wings were just too hot. Yeah. They were blazing. It definitely wasn't the servers. Ooh. A little commentary. Do you know about

our battle with Dan regarding Hooters Takeout? He's for it? Way more than anyone I've ever met. We used to pick lunch. Jake always took pride in the different kinds of restaurants he would order from. And Dan just walked in one day and said, hey, how about Hooters?

I was like, are we going? I haven't had the fish sandwich in years. I was like, are we going there? Yeah. He's like, no, I just want to pick up a fish sandwich from Hooters. We sent Ty Walker. He was there a long time. He was so happy to be the guy to pick up a fish sandwich from Hooters. We sent Ty Walker. He was there a long time. He was so happy to be the guy to pick up food.

Yeah. Are you serious? You were craving a fish sandwich from Hooters? I think I'm the only guy who's ever ordered Hooters to go. That's what took so long is they had to find the filet in the back of the walk-in. No, they didn't have to find. They have plenty of those if you go there. They had to find the filet in the back of the walk-in. No, they didn't have to find. They have plenty of those if you go there. They had to find the to-go boxes.

Like no one's ever done this before. Yeah. You eat here. We actually, we had a couple people come over for a 690 remote a couple weeks ago. And they were like, they were so confused. They brought Hooters to go. They weren't confused. They were fired up because they love Hooters to go. They weren't confused. They were fired up

because they love Hooters just like I do. Do you think their delivery service, what if they had Hooters girls deliver? That's the future, bro. There we go.

Yeah, I'm an idea man. Yeah. I just come up with ideas for other companies, not ours. I mean, how would this go? Jazz, is it you, Dan? You're excited about that?

The Hooters girl delivers you the food. Having an 18-year-old girl show up at your house in orange shorts and pantyhose. Yeah. Just kind of look at her. Have you ever done a hula hooping? She does that. You ever do the hula hoop thing? You have your phone.

Hula hooping. If you want to see something exciting, you can- You don't know about the hula hoop? Look on your phone. I don't. So back in the day, the Hooters waitress, if you said, hey, will you hula hoop? She will. Like they had a hula hoop.

The one in Cleveland, at least. No, they did that here back in the day. Did they? Yeah. I was kind of hoping it was just Cleveland. They would have hula hoop exhibitions periodically throughout your meal. In fact, my buddy Ed was dating a Hooters waitress. Red's Ed?

Right. Cincinnati Red's Ed. He got mad at our other friend because he wanted to show off they did a Hooters waitress girlfriend. So we went to Hooters, and she's serving us and stuff. And then our other friend had her hula hoop in front of us. Respect. Ed was all mad, like, why did he do that? She's got to do her job.

Yeah. Can you hula hoop? She's doing this. It was all mad. Like, why did he do that? She's got to do her job. Yeah. Can you hula hoop? She's doing this. This is great. I get Jason to the mariachi. I really hope that that part is on the video. Yeah. Whatever just happened right there.

Do you think you can hula hoop right now? No. My daughter used to be able to do it for half hour. Like, that was her big bit. Really? Yeah. My kids don't have much. I've never been able to do her big bit. Really? Yeah. I don't... My kids don't have much.

I've never been able to do it. Yeah. Really? No. I can't keep it going for more than like three spins. I could get it going for... I think I got up to

30 seconds or so. Hmm. We should have a little... That's what she said. Okay. A little hula hoop comp. All right. Let's get one.

Right now? Where would you get a hula hoop? Target All right. Let's get one. Right now? Where would you get a hula hoop? Target? That's a super good... No way. Yeah, you can get a hula hoop at Target. You can get one at Wally World, too. Target.

Right now? Yeah. Interesting. I'll bring one on Wednesday. I feel like you would have to Amazon that. I'm going to look in my garage, see if we have any old hula hoops in there. I haven't seen one in a while. Old ones. Oh, yeah. They don't go bad, there. I haven't seen one in a while. Old ones.

Oh, yeah. They don't go bad, right? I don't think they go bad. I'm sorry. This hula hoop's expired. This is out of control. They're $7 now. Sports mayor will speak at the 2024 Republican National Convention.

Inflation, am I right? Yeah, you're right. No. Sports mayor? Man. That makes sense, though. He made the full transition. They need a black guy.

Black guy, made a transition. He could tell the tale of how the reason Dallas is great is because— He loves sports. Loves sports. Everybody else does, too. No, it makes perfect sense. Yeah. And then his profile will get raised.

yeah and then his profile will get raised he's you know he did it so that he can continue to be a politician with higher levels of uh politicianing in the state of texas for sure and as a democratic mayor that's about your limit you know unless you're like really good and or you he's like smoke crack no i'm just saying saying in Texas, if he wants to then become a state representative or governor, he's probably reached his ceiling in Texas as a Democrat. But if he still wants to get some higher paychecks, then yes, he's going to need to switch to be a Republican. Speaking of the RNC, you've seen reports that trump's message is going to be more unifying after this near-death experience i think that's a terrible mistake for his for on his part do you think i think lean into the device oh my no you lean into

bloody fist in the air fight fight fight oh that Oh, that picture is going to be up there. It's pretty badass. These fuckers from the left tried to get me, and look. Well, you're only reading someone's speculation. Wait until he gets up there. Yeah. Because even there were people that said that when he became president. I would find it hard to believe that he's going to-

He'll tone it down now. He's the leader of everyone, and he's like, you lost, I'm doing what I want, because I won. it hard to believe. He'll tone it down now. He's the leader of everyone and he's like, you lost. I'm doing what I want because I won. Here's the thing. He uses this to his advantage. I'm going to buy the shirt. It's a great picture, dude.

It's a badass. I got to have the shirt. AP photographer too. Yeah. That's Pulitzer. Oh, 100%. One hundo. Anyway. I's Pulitzer. Oh, 100%. One hundo. Anyway. Anyways. I'm buying the meme that showed someone pouring Heinz ketchup on his...

Like a top shot? You know, I recently heard I might be getting some money from them. Who? Top shot. What does that mean? I think there's like a class action civil lawsuit man don't glaze over no because there's one of those for like direct tv uh sunday ticket the nfl yeah yeah it's gonna subscribe to that for 15 years or so. Yes, eventually they might say,

hey, look, here's $50 or $100. And whatever law firm has just made a billion dollars. But all the subscribers, so it doesn't excite me at all. The NFL can't afford to give up more. There's probably a pretty good chance that you're going to have to fill out some paperwork. Right, and that means I won't do that. I don't see you doing that.

I won't do that, so I'm not going to get it. And the lawyers know I won't, so they're actually not going to get just their regular... What do they get? What's the percentage that lawyers generally get from a big settlement? 40? Is it 40? 40, yeah.

Okay, so they're going to probably end up with 70. Maybe more. Just because these class action lawsuits, people don't fill that stuff out. No. They don't pay attention. No. Although I'm a little better at that these days. I was working on the old mileage for the taxes this weekend.

There you go. I did a little bit of that myself. In fact, that was one of the things I was bitching to Danny about on the phone yesterday. Because I know he's been like a business owner for quite some time. And I'm like, dude, how come no one told me about quarterly taxes? You need an accountant.

They're both laughing. Well, we got one and he does tell me that. So I fired him because I didn't want to pay quarterly taxes. So I do have a little bit more political news for you. Trump has a vice president pick. Oh, it's a fish? Yeah.

In an hour? Oh, we don't know yet? They're going to wait for us to be done. Oh, okay. Well, let's do an emergency pod. So, J.D. Vance. Are you familiar with this guy at all? I feel like he's a black guy.

Or is that untrue? I 100% understand where you're coming from. Well, you just said. But it's not true. You're thinking of a different... Yeah, you're thinking of a different man whose last name is Vance. Am I? Mm-hmm.

Who's that? Okay. I think I was thinking of J.D. Salinger. The guy who wrote Catcher in the Rye? The guy who wrote Catcher in the Rye. He's famously black. No. Oh, really?

No. Damn. No. No. Not at all. I know, dude. Move on. Turn away from the end of the plank.

Jesus Christ. No, no, no. Come back to the ship, Dan. So J.D. Vance is a guy who wrote a book called Hillbilly Elegy. And it was really- I have that book. It was really, really popular in like 2014, 2015, maybe sometime around then. And it was about like he grew up in like that.

Has anybody else here read this? No, I haven't read it. I listened to the audio book my wife read the book it's like about him growing up in the appalachian mountains and his family was super effed up is he a politician he is now okay he i think he was a marine and it like appealed to liberals because it seemed kind, but it was also like a very bootstrappy type book of, hey, if you're struggling, just pull yourself up. And then he went hard right.

And apparently he's not only going to be the next vice president, he's probably going to be the next president after this one. Is he currently like a politician, though? Is he like a current senator or something? He's from Middletown, Ohio. I don't know if you know where that is. No. And he is a... I would say the middle.

Where he's from, things might have been given. Yeah. But he is a state senator from Ohio. Okay, maybe that's why I've heard of him. Your mom probably has opinions on him, maybe that's why I've heard of him. So your mom probably has opinions on him. That's probably why I've heard of him. He's a lawyer. Grew up in the shitty part of the country.

Claims to have pulled himself up by his bootstraps and now. And he's like 38, 39. Oh, really? Yeah. I thought he might go lady. Who's the lady that was all fired up about... Well, which one? You got Marge.

You got Boebert. No, no, no, no. One of the ones who was running for president. Carrie Lake. Maybe her. Nikki Haley. Maybe her. Yeah, Nikki Haley was in the mix for sure.

She was actually running. Right. Yeah, yeah. Okay. So you think J.D. Vance is the guy, or you're positive? I mean, that's what everyone's saying. Okay. He kind of looks like the Hammer.

See, that's why another reason you could say... He does kind of look like the Hammer. He has Hammer-esque qualities. The... Yep. another reason you could say... He does kind of look like the Hammer. He has Hammer-esque qualities. The other conspiracy theory for why this was all like a Hollywood production, the Republican National Convention starts like now. For three

or four days, right? So that shooting happens and then right now it's everybody's real fired up. To go to Milwaukee? To go to Milwaukee. The good land. You ever been?

To Milwaukee? I'm going to say no. Obviously, I've been to Green Bay. But no, I don't think – Milwaukee's not too to Green Bay. But no, I don't think... Milwaukee's not too far from there, but no, I don't think I ever went. I've heard it's nice. Danny?

No. It is nice. You've been? For what? College football? That was a part of my Stephen Avery Trail of Tears. Hmm. When you went to Manitowoc or whatever?

Yeah. Did you get a Bruges game? Went to the stadium. I don't remember why. They must have been out of town. But yeah, cool downtown. You didn't see the brat race? Mm-mm.

I like that bit. Yeah, so I don't have too much more on J.D. Vance other than to tell you he's going to be the president in five years. Okay. Well, then let's start kissing his ass. All right. There she is. Let's do everything we can to stay in his good graces.

The Dumb Zone News. And I think there was a shitty movie on Netflix or something. Copeland? You agree? Okay. The Hillbilly Elegy? Yeah, I think there was an adaptation.

It sucked. A Netflix movie sucked? I don't believe you. They will pump them out, won't they? Wow. So it's Monday, July 15th. Show number 200, by the way.

How about that? Congrats, guys. Wow. What a moment. Oh. Standing O. A little Standing O from Mortgage Mark. I think Smartless just celebrated their 200th podcast.

Yeah. You guys have only been doing this for like, I don't know, five weeks or something. That's right. On this day in 1799, French soldiers in Egypt discovered the Rosetta Stone, which proved instrumental in deciphering ancient Egyptian hieroglyphics. You know what I'm going to say. Hieroglyphics? I don't know.

Words. You were close enough. When you say hieroglyphics and Rosetta Stone, the word cuneiform comes to mind. Okay. I like that. And I don't know what that means. It was like the earliest form of written text. Yeah, and I believe it was like blocks, right?

I don't remember. Okay. Well, let's look it up. I don't know what the Rosetta Stone even is. It's an app that helps you speak Spanish. Okay. So they discovered that in 1799. On this day in 1945, Byron Nelson won his fifth and final major,

the PGA Championship. The winner back then received $598. $5,000. A slave. In war bonds. $5,000. A slave? In war bonds. War bonds? Yes. I don't even know what that is.

Do you? Sounds good, though. Sounds like you're supporting America. You're essentially loaning money to the government. Correct. Yeah, okay. Sounds like you're supporting America. You're essentially loaning money to the government. Correct. Yeah, okay. Yeah, I remember when I was a kid,

like learning that I had a bunch of bonds. And I'm like, I have absolutely no idea what that means. Yeah. Can I rent a video with that? On this day in 1976, a 36-hour kidnap ordeal began for 26 school children and their bus driver. This is 1976.

They were abducted in California by three gunmen, imprisoned in an underground cell, and eventually the kidnappers were caught and the captives escaped unharmed. They actually buried the bus with the kids inside it. No way.

That's what they're saying? That's what they called the underground cell? I was under the impression of when I was eight years old when this went down because I remember this vividly in the news and was terrified about it. Because you're a kid who might get their school bus? Oh, my God, yeah. Every kid. Kidnapped?

Yeah, that was around that age at the bus. Oh, my God. Yeah. Every kid. Yeah. It was around that age at the time. It had our attention for sure. That probably skewed the stats, too. We always say, oh, there was more kidnappings back then. The way they told the story to me was that they took their bus and buried it. But I think it was another bus that they transferred them in. And that was, in fact, buried underground.

I think there's been a docuseries on this, maybe on Netflix or Hulu or something like that. So it does say that they transferred them from the bus and then put them in a buried truck trailer. That's right. At gunpoint, they had a ladder through a hatch, a buried truck trailer, and they forced all the kids in there. a buried truck trailer, and they forced all the kids in there. And it was one of the most harebrained schemes that was come up with by, I think, two or three of the biggest morons that you could ever imagine. Yeah, it doesn't.

What was the end goal? Ransom. Ransom, yeah. Yeah. Everybody made it out, though. I think. I don't think anybody died. Yeah, I'm not seeing any deaths. Why don't you book someone that was on that bus, Blake?

Post-traumatic stress. Wouldn't it be cool to talk to somebody who was on that bus? What did bus? Boy, I'm going to be totally honest with you. Don't do it. He's kidding. I am not killing. None of these three.

I'm biting. None of these three guys could have kidnapped me. How old were the kids? 10? Six? Seven? Just here says school children, so. Yeah, it was under 10.

And at the time, the kidnappers were 24, 24, and 22. No chance, bro. Fourth grade me? You're not taking me. On this day in 1973, Nolan Ryan threw his second no-hitter of the season. The game also featured a legendary baseball moment when Tigers first baseman Norm Cash, in his third at-bat, came up to the plate with a table leg

because he couldn't hit Nolan Ryan with a bat. So he's just like that. And then he laughed. Baseball. And then he went back and got a bat. Yeah, so. And then he walked on four pitches. Nolan couldn't find his own.

Nolan had 11 walks and three wild pitches in that game and still got his no-hitter. I do think baseball doesn't get enough credit for its bits. It is the most bit-laden sport. It's primarily relegated to the minor leagues, right? Pre-1980s probably, too, right? Yeah, probably. But you got the old story of the old potato trick.

Yeah. Where the guy, it was a hidden ball trick, and the catcher threw the ball, or the third baseman threw like a potato back to the pitcher. Like he literally had a potato. Where? I don't know where he would keep it. And he threw it back to the pitcher,

and then the runner steps off a third, and he tags him because he's got the ball. Yep. And that's a legendary story. Like, ah, the old potato trick. You would have seen the sour cream and the bacon is flying off it as you throw it. I don't think it was dressed. Oh.

I thought it was a baked potato. But, you know, like the little person, like the Eddie Goodell story. You don't have that in the NFL. Like what if we just put a midget out here? We would if like Belichick, if he had found a loop, you know, he's like the last one that did like a drop kick or something.

It's like the left-handed punter. Yeah, yeah. Or the left-footed punter. Yeah, but if the NFL played 162 games a year, I bet we would. Yeah. You're probably right. You just get so bored.

You're mathematically eliminated in like June. Yeah, and I still have to keep coming to work every day. Right. Let's let Spalding play quarterback next game. No one's in the stands. Let's get a big jug lady to run out and kiss the players. Call her Morgana. Yeah.

The kissing bandit. jug lady to run out and kiss the players. Call her Morgana. Yeah. The kissing bandit. On this day in 1994, Chicago manager Gene Lamont requests the bat of Indians Albert Bell be checked for cork at Comiskey Park. This led to cork gate

where in fact, one of the Indians players crawled through the I don't know what you would call it. Scaffolding? Nah. Catacolding? Nah. Catacombs. Nah. Those are my two best shots, Dan. You're somehow crawling over the ceiling

into the umpire's room. He dropped down through a vent, took the bat, replaced it with another bat, and then went back. Later, they were able to determine that he did that because it was a different color bat that he replaced it with.

Come on. Yeah. Yeah. It might have been Indians pitcher Jason Grimsley. It was. Grimsley took a bat belonging to Indians player Paul Sorrento and accessed the area above the false ceiling in the clubhouse, which I don't know if that really was the word that you were looking for.

No, but that sounds like it's probably the right one. And crawled across with a flashlight in his mouth until he reached the umpire's room. Isn't that great? It's fantastic. I think it goes back to what I was just saying. Were you an Albert Bell guy? Of course. What did he change his name to?

Albert. It used to? Albert. It used to be Joey. He's Joey Bell. Okay. When he first came up, he was Joey, but then he was an alcoholic, and they were like, well, you've got to change everything. They used to chant Joey at old Arlington Stadium when he'd be out in left field.

He got mad. He would get mad pretty easily. I think he would get mad. And on this day in 2003, the 12th player ever to homer in his first All-Star at-bat was a Texas Ranger.

The question is, who was that Texas Ranger? 2003. Can you repeat the question? Yeah, repeat the question. The 12th player to ever home Homer in his first All-Star at-bat. I'll give you even a hint. All-Star at-bat.

I don't know if we need a hint. What did he say? It was a game-winning home run. Off of Eric Gagné. Off of Eric Gagné. Was he a third baseman? It was. Was it Blalock?

It was Hank Blalock. And Gagne. Look at this group of baseball guys. Seamheads. Was that the year that Gagne hadn't flown a save yet? Is that right? He had like a save streak going or something, and Rangers fans were like, yeah, it's our boy.

Yeah. Today's birthday is we have Greg Williams the 66. Hey, Hammer. Or Greg Williams. They should not get a yard. He got five f***ing yards on a nine man front.

What game are we playing? Checkers? Chess? Putt-putt golf? We're playing f***ing football. Dame Lillard is 34. He's been to Milwaukee.

He has. He also authored one of the most iconic sports images of our entire life. In the pile? The walk-off. Where he just looked at the camera and was like, come on. He's also, I'm trying Jennifer. Do you guys know about I'm trying Jennifer?

Vaguely. There's a very funny tweet where some lady tweeted to him like, hey, why don't you win a playoff series? And her name was Jennifer. And he just replied, I'm trying, Jennifer. That's awesome.

Trying, Jennifer. I will use that phrase often in my life. I'm trying, Jennifer. Jesse Ventura is 73. The body. Barry Melrose is 68. If alive. He's alive, right?

Barry Melrose? We'll look into that. I think we would know if he were. John Stallworth is 72. Blake, who's John Stallworth? Steelers wide receiver. Okay. Impressive.

This guy. Barry Trotz is 62. NHL, HBO show, right? He once got mad at me. I think I remember that. Because I was wearing a medieval knight outfit, and I walked into the locker room to ask him questions. And he thought that was just

too much of a joke for the sacred game of hockey. Here comes the Sir Kristen of Cleveland. Was that the same night as Nate? Or was that a different... Nate was 1920s. What's Nate? Nate Yule. Oh, dude, you're mixing up

so many things. That's what I'm saying. It's the same sport. Yeah, yeah, but I just know... Nate Yule're mixing up so many things. That's what I'm saying. It's the same sport. Yeah, yeah, but I just know— Nate Yule is a different city. Well, that's what I'm saying. I wasn't around for any of this, so I'm just trying to figure out how many different times you got yelled at by hockey officials. No, Nate Yule was a guy who—a PR director who yelled at Gribble for doing 1920s Reporter Guy in Washington, Pat. Okay.

reporter guy in Washington, Pat. Okay. And I believe Barry Trotz was here, and I had to wear a Medieval Knights outfit to ask questions to players after the game. With grooves? With grooves. Okay. And that's when I met Jerry from the Mucky Duck.

Oh, nice. Barry Trotz was in Washington. That's part of the reason I'm confused. Oh, really? Okay. Yeah, you're right on that show. Did you have a sword or just the outfit? I don't think I had a sword.

No. They made you check that at the... A former Major League Baseball player named Peter O'Brien is 34 today. So apparently he was a spare, played for the Diamondbacks and maybe somewhere else. Not related to Pete O'Brien. Played for the Diamondbacks and maybe somewhere else. Not related to Pete O'Brien. But he was on the birthday list today, and I was looking just so I researched him.

Yes. But he did somewhere along the line say, you know what? I've realized the error of my former's ways. I should be called Peter. Because if you say my name real fast, it doesn't reflect kindly upon me. Yeah. It's like Brian got an unfortunate nickname. Right.

That's old Brian down at the end of the street. He lives with his mom. He's a little silly, a little funny. Coaches kids' teams, but he doesn't have a... Coaches youth sports, yeah. I was talking about that with some friends the other day. That's Pete O'Brien. Did you ever – I can't remember if we talked about this the other day or not,

but did you have that like as a kid? The one funny guy in the neighborhood? Like did you ever play – Yeah, that's what they were called. He's just funny. He's funny like that. Did you ever play for a guy who didn't have a kid on the team? I think so.

Baseball, basketball, whatever. Yeah, I think it was football. But this guy really, you could tell he wanted to be a, he thought he was an NFL coach. Vince Lombardi in trading? Yeah. I can't believe my parents let me do that. I can't believe in the 70s there were people that were just, you know, it was known. My parents encouraged me to sleep over.

I'd be crying like, I don't want to. I hate Brian. It'll be good for you, Danny. I don't want to sleep at Brian's house. Yeah. Ariana Huffington is 74. Carlmouth. Actor Terry O'Quinn is 72.

Don't know it. He's from Lost. He's the bald guy on Lost. Oh, Spongebob, sir. And Hawaii Five-0 as well. Let's see. Forrest Whitaker is 63. Ah, Kavanaugh.

I know him as Jefferson. Mm-hmm. From Fast Times at Ridgemont High. He didn't have many lines. What's Kavanaugh? Fifth season. Shield. Okay.

But his best is when they walk up to him. Hey, nice car. I think it was the fifth. Don't fuck with me. I think fourth season was Glenn Close. I like the fact that you really know Fast Times. I watched some of it the other day. Excellent.

It was on. I was channel surfing, and it was on. Okay. So I watched some of it. Anyways, fifth season was... Spicoli wrecks the car, and he's like, my dad's got tools. I can fix this.

He's a TV repairman. He's got the ultimate set of tools. Because TV repair tools, you know, synonymous with auto repair. Auto restoration. Eddie Griffin is 56. Man,

he's got a couple specials that absolutely hit. Oh yeah? Like stand up? Yeah. Undercover Brother, great movie. Fantastic. How old?

56. I would have thought older. I would have thought way older. Yeah. And Brigitte Nielsen, 61. Flava, Flava, Flav. Arnold? No, Sly.

Yeah, Rocky. Oh, okay. She was Drago's wife. Oh, that's right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Born on this day, now dead. She was in Playboy, too.

Rembrandt. Don't even ask me. How do they know? Don't even ask me. Would you be surprised to know that Rembrandt... I couldn't give you a century. That Rembrandt actually watched the first season of Hogan's Heroes. There's no way.

No, I don't know. He probably lived in... But again, that's a name that you would have said Picasso. I would have said, yeah, he was probably Rembrandt's friend. Yeah. But apparently, they lived in hundreds of years apart. When's Rembrandt? Does anybody know?

It appears to be like the 17th century. 17th century? Yeah. Yeah. Died in 1669. Oh, wow. That was 100 years off, Jake. Noth century? Yeah. Yeah. Died in 1669. Oh, wow. That was 100 years off, Jake. No, you weren't.

You said 17th century. I said 1750 is when I thought he was relevant. Died on this day in 1542. Lisa del Giancodo. She was painted by Leonardo da Vinci. She's the real Mona Lisa. And I've seen it. In person?

Up close. It's small, right? It is pretty small, yeah. Unimpressive. Did you throw like... Prefer a top shot? Pancake batter on it to protest something? I did think it was impressive

that somebody was able to throw a bowl of soup at it. Handcuff yourself to it somehow? Yeah. With a cinder block? Got on the stay in 1940, Robert Wadlow. He was the tallest person in recorded history. 8'11"? Yes.

Yeah. Everyone had that book. How old was he? Like 24? Like really young, right? Did you say? I don't have his age at death here, but... He had a massive pituitary situation.

Didn't he actually have the double-double record for a while? In the WNBA. Yeah, when he was right in the WNBA, because he did what they allege that anybody can do, right? Just, oh, now I'm a woman. Yep. That poor bastard. 1974 on this day died Christine Chubbuck.

Okay, can we go back to Wadlow real quick? Please. So, look at the growth chart by age. You know. It's insane. You know how I've told you before like how funny I find the basketball reference nicknames? Because

usually you've never heard of them. This Robert Wadlow Wikipedia page, it's got his born days, died day, and then other names. The Gentle Giant. The Tallest Man Who Ever Lived.

First one's better. First one's better. The Illinois Giant. the tallest man who ever lived. That's not a nickname. First one's better. First one's better. That's not a nickname. The Illinois Giant. Not a good one. No, because like, if you're the tallest person in the world,

then why would your global man? Why not be the Main Street Giant? Main Street Giant, yeah. Why do you have to be? Why limit yourself to one state? Well, maybe that was when he was younger, and then they kind of figured out, wait. There's nobody else bigger.

He's the world giant. Perhaps. It's just an interesting Wikipedia note. Anyway, Christine Chubbuck. I've never heard you mention her. She died on this day in 1974. She was a TV news reporter who committed suicide on TV. Live on TV at the age of 29.

Yeah, I've seen the video. That's not surprising at all. I would have guessed that. It's super, super, super unsettling. But yeah. Is it on LiveLeak? It is on LiveLeak. I don't think LiveLeak exists anymore.

Well, it used to be on LiveLeak. Is it on Pornhub?reg abbott would not let me know you have to go to different places yep um but she like does a whole intro like uh we're here today to watch me die pretty much that kind of thing and then takes out a gun and... Side of the head, right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. While doing the news.

We got to hand it to her. She is being mentioned to, you know, had she just jumped off the Golden Gate Bridge... Probably not making this. ...where I'm mentioning that today. Yeah. Like, she did something that was truly unique and has stood the test of time.

Yeah. Dang. These were her final words in keeping with the wxlt practice of presenting the most immediate and complete reports of local blood and guts news tv40 presents what is believed to be the first in television and living color and exclusive coverage of an attempted suicide and then she did it and then she wrote her own bulletin for the next story about how she did it respect like they had to read that like she had it. And then she wrote her own bulletin for the next story about how she did it. Respect. Like they had to read that?

Like she had it written for them. I don't know that they read it, but she definitely wrote it. Yeah, it's highly graphic. What do you think about her hair? Oh, now we're looking at TV again. And died on this day in 2003, TechShram.

And on this day in 2006, Robert H. Brooks. Yeah, we all know that name. We hail Robert H. Brooks. The founder of Hooters of America. The founder of Hooters of America. And that was Today in History. Are you aware of Hooters Air? I don't know what that means. Is that like a new shoe by Nike?

No, there was a brief amount of time where Hooters operated an airline. Oh, wow. What? Yeah. No way. Okay. I operated an airline. Oh, wow. What? No way. Okay. They probably just took an old TWA or United and just co-opted it and said, we're going to make this

like a Hooters pop-up. Hooters pop-up flight is what it was. That's kind of like my idea of DoorDash for Hooters. Mine is a less expensive idea. What if it was DoorDash, they will deliver Hooters, but when they get an order from Hooters, no matter who the driver is, they have to switch into the outfit.

Even if it's like Felipe? Yes. Or Ahmed. Would one of you guys wear a Hooters outfit on our trip to California? What's the payoff? I want the feeling that we are with a Hooters girl. He's looking at you. I'll do it.

I feel like we need step two or three. I've seen Blake dressed as a woman, and I want more. I liked it. Anyway, joining us now for closing remarks is Mortgage Mark. Thank you. In the flesh. Caroline has handed off the mic. It's a big deal, I'm told.

Now, we were at your house in the past with Caroline and you, but you were kind of a background player. I was. I got some notoriety from that. I didn't know I was on camera. In fact, we understand, though, that Caroline, she's the listener of the show. You're just annoyed by us.

Important lesson here. So when you guys, I think the very first time you did a remote, Caroline comes to me and says, Oh, man man they apparently come to houses or businesses or whatever we're broke how much do you think this cost setup question so i said a number she goes good news we can get two for that price okay so that's what you're doing here so you did okay yeah so that's what we're doing here i guess so we're so bad at business yeah but we're good. Yeah, but we're good at having fun. You're inching there. I'm told you're inching there. Like it's now what?

960? We're good at fun. Is that true? Yeah. We did. And interestingly enough, we had to hire a female to right the ship business wise. And she hula hoops for us. It's great.

Yeah. And delivers hooters. Yeah. Well, it's neat to see the same faces Michael and I were texting I was like now we're buds and this is my second show I'd ever listened to

so it's you guys are doing great okay 200 I'm 10 what 1% of your shows I feel like we will be texting soon as well

because oh I'd love to you've offered me a stand up desk he's a big proponent huge Verdesk yeah

the actual one that raises up and all that how long have you done the stand up desk year and's a big proponent. Huge. Verdesk? Yeah. The actual one that raises up and all that. How long have you done the stand up desk? Year and a half. Life changing. Really? Love it. I got an extra one for you if you want it. It just feels great. Don't tempt me with a good time. Again, a lot of movement. He has two. I was thinking of grabbing

one and taking it to our studio. Could I do the show McAfee style? Let's just see how that feels. Dan just wants to be McAfee. Huh? I've already got, you know. Bought some shirts?

I just got to cut off the sleeves. An hour ago, I heard Dan say, I'll be like McAfee. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I didn't know what it was, and I didn't want to ask. So here we go. It's yours if you want it.

It's going to be mine. I do want it. Jake thought you wanted to guard people's laptops against viruses. He's a good friend of mine, by the way. So my favorite part of today's show, guys, for the record, not to interrupt, but my favorite part was right when all the special talk was talking about

porn and all that, my mother-in-law comes walking in. That was super great. Probably your favorite part because right when all the special talk was talking about porn and all that. My mother-in-law comes walking in. Yeah. That was super great. Probably your favorite part. Cause it's not your mother. Right. That's true.

It's a mom-in-law. Right. It's her mother. So it's not going to hurt you. Well, I'm a son-in-law. Yeah. So there,

that was fun. I appreciate that timing. Sorry about that. Jake did apologize. I appreciate that. That's all right. She's, uh,

she's been there before. Nothing. She, I'm sure. Right. Pretty okay apologize. I appreciate that. That's all right. She's, uh, she's been there before. Nothing. She, I'm sure. Right. Pretty okay with it, but stellar. So I'm also told it told his tradition to give you guys stuff.

So Caroline does have something, but before that I have something for you guys as well. Caroline may or may not know this, but you may not want it from what I now know about you. As she whispered in my ear, beef jerky. So in, in the freezer over here,

I have exotic meats so blake and michael last time i already got some michael michael michael's made some blake you have not is that right you got bongo and all this other stuff for you guys so exotic meats are available and i understand that may not be your thing but we have exotic meats for you in the freezer to take home today i love it i'm in i mean why not it's not generally my thing but i do enjoy um like if somebody gives me a bottle of alcohol or something, I'm not real stoked on that, but I know lots of people who are. It's a good re-gift.

And that could make me a, yes. Meats, not so much. Yeah, yeah. Not so much for meats. I'll take it. It's yours. Take the meat, Dan. Well, I got a wife who loves that kind of meat.

Yeah. Spicy meat. Not so much, you know. Yeah, no. You're mean. Think about it. take the meat Dan well I got a wife who loves that kind of meat yeah spicy meat not so much yeah your meat think about it I'll put yeah I'm on it

alright I'm on it so Caroline is this where I do this or do I need to go longer I'm not familiar with these closing remarks and how long they go

I certainly know that people don't tune in to listen to me yeah this is your bit so this is I will say this so Caroline you guys

you guys pleasure my wife on a daily basis. Jesus Christ. Excellent. It's absolutely true. I love hearing that. Wake up. Haven't heard that in a long time. Back to Dan's new digitizing company.

I don't even remember, Dan. On a scale of one to 10 for happiness, you guys are responsible probably about 60% of it. In the morning, I hear your voices. In the evening, she's finishing the- Can I just say that's not really how a scale of one to ten works no it does because you guys are easily like a five you know okay five out of that eight okay great I'm just going that is good boy okay got it but you guys are literally on a vacation

I think Rachel you were talking about how your husband goes on vacation vacation you guys come with us that's the first thing I listen to and so again I don't know you guys well but I know enough of you to know this is really cool so i will say that uh i appreciate you guys for always being awesome because she's tuning in and i think you guys got listeners from our last remote and we were taking her away from you she's not bothering you don't have to bother you yeah when when everybody gets their piece of your time you're like hey put out a little more content yeah why not there's nothing wrong with five days a week two days two days

two days two days guys morning and night so it's been good well we appreciate that that's very kind of you well thank you guys so I'm gonna hand the

I guess the microphone and the spotlight over to my lovely wife okay so my gift Caroline everybody yeah that's right oh yeah yeah yeah Gorgeous Caroline

yes I think Blake might get the most use out of this, but I'll let Jake open it. Okay. My dad was playing golf, and Mark noticed this and told me I had to have it. So from one DF to another. Is that a Dumb Zone putter cover?

It is a club cover Yeah that's mine But it says Wow It says DF on it That's mine So I I said I have to have that

So I figured Blake That might be for you Thank you That's awesome You're welcome Well thanks for coming guys Thanks for having us

We appreciate you guys Thank you Michael Adios Lofo Thank you, Marcos. Adios, mofo. See you next time. Here we go. Here we go.