The Dumb Zone FREE - The Dumb Zone live at the Byron Nelson | DZ 5-3-25

Episode Date: May 3, 2025

Get every episode of The Dumb Zone by subscribing at DumbZone.com or Patreon.com/TheDumbZoneWe're live today from the 17th green at TPC Craig Ranch for the Byron Nelson tournament thanks to Tito's Vodka. We're joined by Cirque du Sirois and one half of The Mom Game as we take in golf and try to find a Belichick/Jordon couple (00:00) - Open: Live from the Byron Nelson (37:29) - Snake bites and 9/11 guilt (01:07:42) - Emily Jones: Wireless at the Byron (01:39:19) - News: Triple murders and DUI stories (02:10:57) - VM birthdays/Today in History ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Hello, I'm DFW's own Danny Bayless letting you know that you are about to hear a free podcast of the dumb zone. But if you'd like to subscribe at dumbzone.com, you will get four shows per week plus the weekend wrap up and any bonus epi's like our business Wednesday interviews. Oh, you'll also get our DZTV archives again, that's a dumbzone.com to subscribe now on to today's program. The proceeding and the following content are brought to you by no puppet productions and the dumb zone. What about Nick Saban and Miss Terry? No, no, no.

If I'm going to watch somebody else do it. What about Hillary Clinton? No, I want her to be hot. Condo is your right. Someone you respect. No, no, no. If I'm going to watch somebody else do it. What about Hillary Clinton? No, I want her to be hot. Condo is your right. Someone you respect. No, no, no. Not Hillary. Wash.

I want her to be, no. Oh, God. Wash. Wash. Kamala and wash. Wash in the Asian lady. Yeah, wash in the Asian reporter. Stop.

Stop. Oh, my God. Speaking of birth, he'd have a lung dart. I can't. I can't. Oh yeah, him afterward tugging on a sing. Laying in bed. Alright, alright, alright, alright, alright.

Alright, alright, alright, alright, alright. I never listen. I'm gonna listen. I never listen. I'm gonna listen. I wanna listen to the drums. I'm gonna listen. I wanna listen to the drums. Alright, alright, alright. I'm gonna listen.

I'm gonna listen. I wanna listen. I wanna listen McDowell. Hello Dan, I'm Jake Gumb. Hi Dan, I'm Blake Jones. And what are we doing? It's Saturday. It's for the boys.

My ears are extremely hot. Yeah. Hello, hello, hello. That sounds fantastic. Your whole body's hot, bro. One take, hello. That sounds fantastic. Your whole body's hot, bro. One take, Blake. How does he know the volumes? I say something and it's perfect.

We are broadcasting today. It's a momentous sports weekend, of course. Would you agree, Cash, we have the F1 Miami Grand Prix. Ho! Are you talking about the sprint race today or the Grand Prix tomorrow? Tomorrow. We have the Madrid Open Finals. You're making jokes. No, no, no. I'm just I'm leading somewhere. We've got many game sevens in in hockey going on this week. It's a huge weekend. NBA playoff game. We have the Kentucky Derby today.

That's right. Yeah. But all of that. I dare say overshadowed. By moving day at the C.J. Cup, Byron Nelson. What? That is where we are broadcasting from live to tape. It could not be more perfect. And live to live. The weather's perfect and you have the sororities

on a moving day. Yes, joining us today is the twins. They're at their full power. You know how I always tell you, like, dealing with my kids, one-on-one is one thing, but when they're both together, they cannot be stopped. Can you take it? Can you take a full dose? And then you put them at a golf tournament. On moving day. On moving day.

Not moving day yet. Well, that's the thing. It's cut day into moving day. Yeah. Both. So we have one foot straddling into cut day. Absolutely, one foot is still in cut day. One foot into moving day. Yeah. Both. So we have one foot straddling into cut day. Absolutely. One foot is still in cut day.

Yeah, this is the point where has a show ever done. That's what I'm saying. No. We're right on the, this is like politically, people would argue whether or not it's a golf tournament yet or not. We're like right where it gets born. Like is it right?

I don't know. There's going to be. By Saturday. There's going to be a moment shortly shortly I know Vodka care about it. The blink of an eye. Yeah. It switches from cut day to move day. You know. We're all gonna know you're gonna feel it. You're gonna feel it in your gut. Electricity. In your golf veins. And it'll be moving. And if you were out here looking for us, well go find the Tito's. That's right. That's right. The Tito's tent. The Tito's. That's right.

That's right. The Tito's Tent. It's open to the public. It's Texas, we don't say vodka, we say Tito's. That's right. We say Tito's, I don't even say the word vodka. We're at the Green on hole 17. Tito's Handmade Vodka, yes, the Green, hole 17.

Yeah. Like this is the place to see and be seen. 100%. I was actually watching the broadcast yesterday after we got moved to today, and there weren't that many people here, but I think the people who had been here had been here a long time Yeah, so there was someone right here a golfer. He was euro Had a Z in his name kizzy kizzeer Pat Pat and Kazire. Yeah, and he looked up here and gave up. Oh Damn to you. No

to the people and the announcers like, exactly, there's been a couple of people who have been enjoying themselves during the weather delay. Few live-ations. Yeah. Already. Well, it was six, no, I think last night,

it was six o'clock and there were like three people here, but they were blacked out. Oh, okay, so it was like, they've been here through a six hour delay. Texas tech guy. Exactly. I stayed through the weather delay. I can go when I want. I bought my ticket. That was Fitz shooting that. It's my favorite thing.

That was so good. He always cuts out because right when the audio stops, you can hear Fitz going, well, hey, shut up. I want to hear that. He cuts that part out. Wow. I want to hear that. Him and Abe's a brooder. I want to hear that. He cuts that part out. Wow. I want to hear that.

Him and Abe's a brooder. I would also be remiss. You wouldn't want me to be remiss about anything, would you? No, like you missed and missed up. That's it. So I will not be remiss because I do want to just send a little love out to Elite Rides, DFW. They drove us here right up to the gate.

They basically drove right up into the hole. Dude, how excited I was to get here and I didn't want that ride to end. Yeah. It was so nice. Was it temperature control? Yeah, I'd say so. Water bottles everywhere you could even reach. The windows weren't tinted though.

Phone chargers, any kind you want. Presidential. Oh. It was the beast? Yeah, load up their app or search them online online is there like a code for dumb zone people Yeah, there is it's DZ 15 for 15% off your first ride What's the name of this company elite rides DFW? They got an app or you can call 844 ride DFW Yeah, that was pretty sweet. Even if you have an old lame phone. They have a charger for you. Mm-hmm

Oh, yeah, yeah, they care. They had the different Yeah, he's phone they have a charger for you. Oh yeah yeah they had the different thingies connection thingy for the put in the hole of the phone. And Elite Rides DFW. The connection wiener. Right. Because you have a your phone as a hole that would not be the wiener. No. So not available for you today but tomorrow hit them up if you want to come out here to the C Cup by Red Nelson and they're available to drag a little strange out of there are they oh yeah yeah okay no he's not locked in just for us dude they got frickin four or five vehicles now they're growing I'm sorry they're growing I'm sorry for short siding so I'm sorry for having some sponsor

conversation were you thinking of average rides, the FWU? Mistakenly, I was. I was doing mediocre rides. Because they just have one car, maybe two. Dirty. Ashing in the stick shift. Passenger. Stick shift.

This is great, dude. So what happened yesterday? Let's reset the scene. Oh, yeah, we were supposed to do this program yesterday, but it was like rainy. And boy, the behind the scenes where there was some paddling going on of our operation. Well-oiled machine. I was so impressed. To determine whether or not we are going to broadcast because of

course the engineering guys get out here real early. That of course is Clayton and Blake. Blake somehow I think Blake gets the worst of a lot of this because he's the engineering guy but he's also the responsible for on-air content and then if something goes awry with a sponsor usually that finds its way to Blake as well. So I don't know what to say about that Blake. I guess I'm sorry but... Say thank you. Yeah thank you Blake. that, Blake. I guess I'm sorry, but say thank you.

Yeah, thank you. Thank you, Blake. Thank you for handling. I mean, it's a thanks. Can he struggling to find the right words? No longer a moment. Unsung, you're the song here. Now that you're done gargling his balls, you want to work your way to the shaft, too? Or what are we?

Yeah, you want the final 10 percent or what? I'll just keep. But what were we talking about? Why am I saying all that? Why we oh, yesterday. Yeah, behind the scenes, just the whole. So they're out here just waiting in the rain. They wouldn't be they couldn't be let in. And we're I'm sitting there with the radar looking at,

you know, step by step. You ever pause the radar on your weather app and then you drag it a little bit. Okay, at 11.15, still, and it looked like till like 4 p.m. Anyway, we had to eventually called off. After much haranguing, much back and forth, we said, look, we gotta just bail. But they graciously offered us to be here today. Said the weather would be perfect and they did not lie.

Oh my gosh. This is it, man. It's sunny but not oppressively hot. It's like actually. It's 64 right now. You could walk around with a nice little jacket. It's heaven. It's perfect, 65.

It's perfect out here. This is Texas San Diego. Yeah, it really is. You know, weather-wise, this is probably the most perfect Nelson, Byron Nelson ever. What he said. Let's get to it. Because it usually gets hot.

What are we calling it? Boy, I don't know now. This is a debate in the Sorolla verse. Oh, yeah. The Nelson or the Byron? Yeah. Well, it's never, ever, ever, ever I just call it the CJ Cup.

Me too. Like, we've gotten yelled at. And When I'm here, I mentioned Tito's handmade vodka. Those are the only two entities, but you all go on. Byron or Nelson or neither. I've had it beat into my head that it's the Nelson and anything other than that sounds stupid. From them? Like they're about that? Probably ticket programming over the years. This is not your grandpa's Byron Nelson is what we're saying. And maybe that's the switch. This is not your grandpa's Byron Nelson is what we're saying and maybe that's just now awesome Maybe that's the switch but we have these hats right in front of us welcoming us to the green on hole 17 and the back Of it officially printed from this event says at the Byron

The one you're wearing Then it's at the then it's the Byron. That's right, but it's never been that way. Well times changed. That's right I'm here for it Do you think we're the hang zone? Some people definitely do I would never call you that we walked around the same way that I would never say the Byron Yeah, some guy goes Bob and Jake That's right

That's that one actually hasn't happened before I just her overheard That's the ticket and then then the one guy said no no no that's that's the dumb zone that's a Dan and Davey and then another positive goes they got fired from the ticket. Yeah hell yeah. And I'm just like yes. Close enough. I do get that a lot. Yeah no if there was a radio station remote scheduled here yesterday it probably wouldn't have been moved to Saturday, but your boys. That's right. We're liable the pivot boys. That's right we're able to do that as you know, we're not a

Tanker right right small little boat. We're in this ship. We're a dinghy. You're a scalpel. You're not a machete So what's what's your plan for today? Mikey is we sit here in the Tito. Is this like a go day? I would expect absolutely. I would expect very little from him as each quarter hour goes on. I call in for, cause usually there's Tito's tokens we can acquire from Ben. So I did like a casual, he's a guy, you know, rock. Yeah. Yeah.

I'm like, you hear bro? I said,'s a guy, you know, rocks the kiddos here. I'm like, you here bro? I said, you here bitch? You know, make it real casual. I've been out there the last couple days, I may come out later. I'm like, where'd you stash the bucket of tokens? Still keeping it fun. But asking for free drinks. So he sent me a contact for the second-in-command that's here a picture. Head on a swivel for this man who has our tokens for unlimited transfusions. But in the picture he had a red shirt on. So that could be old.

We're looking for him. This is the type of day I miss for sure. Really? Yeah, if there's ever, I mean, this is the only time where you're just like, all right. You just wake up and you're like, all right, here we go. Here we go. If we could meet by about noon, I'd just. It's the CJ Cup.

It's the CJ. It's golf. It's the Byron. It's the Byron. It's the 11th major. It's moving day. Let's see here. What do we got at the leaderboard?

Well, Scotty was. Scotty is actually on pace to I believe break the record for 72. The record set this year. Yeah, Hideki Matsuyama set the all-time PGA Tour record for furthest under par in a four-round tournament, got to 35 under. And that was in Hawaii at this course that's just super easy for these dudes. They always go super low. The previous record was 34 under at that or 34 at that same tournament like two years ago. So that's the spot where they always just shattered this record. And Scotty Shepard is on pace to threaten it or beat it. They're like you're watching someone maybe destroy a golf course

like no one ever has in tour history this week with Scotty Shepard. And you can be here for that. You can be here for that. You can see it. Our own guy. The thing is, it's that they're using torpedo clubs. So they're like, just you could properly put the head weight. You have all the information. You know what's funny is I didn't know what the CJ group was.

I still don't. OK, well, I'll tell you. It's a conglomerate of sorts from Korea, the good one. Good. Like, they've just one of the, I don't know if it's, I would say it's like GE or something almost. But it's just like this massive company. They have grocery stores, which they have food from down here.

Do they own BbGo? Do they own BbGo? They do. OK. I'm fascinated by their dumplings. Yeah, they do. They do biotech, pharmaceuticals, just one of these. Yeah. One of these.

A little bit of this, a little bit of that. Yeah, Dan and I walked around, and a couple of the guys in red pants who are like the sales bigwigs walked us into the super elite suite areas where the CJ Cubs suite is. Yeah. I told you. Damn, that's where he disappeared to?

12 extremely well put together Korean people just like eating the most amazing food. You went there? Did you taste it? No. They were sitting there, it was just like the Dennis Rodman game at the. No.

With Kim Jong Un, yeah. Silence then clapping. Yeah. Move it? Okay, then clapping. Yeah. Move it. OK, my bad. Yeah. Where was that? Is that right over here somewhere?

Down that way was towards what, 16? Oh, we went that way. Yeah. Yeah. OK, yeah, 16. That way and then left. Yeah, it's at the very end here. So this thing enveloped 17.

It was at the very T. They showed us a sweet. But it's on both sides, right? So you have. Yeah, we're on They showed us a sweet. For 17. But it's on both sides, right? So you have. Yeah, we're on one side now. 16 green coming in, 17 tee going out. Look out both ways, and it's covered, and it has AC if you go in that part, and a bartender.

And that one. Yeah, it has a separate bartender. That one, for 50 people, for all four days was like 100. Worth it. And then there was another one he said you could get for, I think it was like 500 a day for the whole weekend per person.

Maybe that was the other Tito's place. Yeah. No, that was the Choctaw Tents. Choctaw, Choctaw. Okay, yeah. Over there, it's like, yeah, like 50 grand per. It's a lot. Yeah.

There's so many people with so much money. But you don't have your separate buyer or bartender. Can people in front of us hear us at all or no? Yeah, there's a lot. Yeah. There's so many people with so much money. But you don't have your separate buyer or bartender. Can people in front of us hear us at all or no? Yeah, here's a PA. Well, we're not blasting the place. Okay, I just wasn't sure. Yeah, you said something off color with the children a minute ago, I was wondering that.

I don't care about that. I'm just wondering. It's kind of cool how at this tournament they've created this. It's just like they did in Phoenix. That's what they're obviously trying to sort of emulate, but just like in Phoenix, that 17th hole, and this hole is a fairly innocuous par three, just kind of a regular boring hole.

They're like, screw it, we are building suites around the whole thing, we're creating this party atmosphere, creating something out of nothing. And they've done it now for a few years and it works, man. It's freaking cool out here. This is the coolest spot on the course. So what happens with guys who didn't finish their second round? They will. You guys were explaining it. Well, I know, but logistically, how do they?

They drop a tee in the ground when it gets dark, wherever their ball is. They drop a tee in the ground or whatever. Like two tees. Right? And they mark where their ball was yesterday. Come out this morning, horn blows, ball's in the same spot that it was, continue on.

Yeah. Wonder if they ever come out late at night to move the ball a little closer? Yeah, just move it up a couple feet in the fairway Hey CJ cup though CJ group very cool. You guys remember who this used to be sponsored by several people 18 DC No, Edie Edm yeah, no Several people. EDC? EDM. Yeah, no, anyways. But no, my favorite story was right around the time Live was happening and like the Saudis were popping,

this tournament was going to be sponsored by Raytheon. The weapons producer. But they had just sold like a ton of weapons to the Saudis. And what's his name, Jay Monahan? Yeah, the tour guy stepped in and was like, look, this is just, this is too much. One bridge, one missile too far. And when we did that story at the time,

I was like, Raytheon, this is insane. And somebody sent me a picture at the time, I was like, this is how Raytheon, like this is insane. And somebody sent me a picture at the ballpark, the gilf, there's actually like a missile launcher, like a replica missile launcher in Rangers colors that just says like Raytheon. Hell yes, really? That's headed to a village to fucking wipe out some Houthis. I thought you you were gonna say it was like the old ballpark with a bell that dings during home runs and they had a rocket Yeah, they were in a launch. So do they just use it for the village if the Rangers lose the World Series That's all it is. Yeah, right now there's 500 t-shirts

Yeah, just add plutonium and launch So now we know about the CJ group. That's interesting. So they make missiles? No, they make everything else. They make dumplings. They're Korean. They do make dumplings.

TC had some dumplings. Pretty good. Yeah, they got some good food here, man. They've also got a good veggie burger, which I don't think they've ever sold before. Oh, the guy was surprised. That's the story of my life. Every time I order, he's like, hey, tell me how they taste. We haven't sold one of these.

They had to go find it. Yeah, I'll take the veggie burger. Really? Really? Yeah. Okay, hang on a minute. All right. I wonder what behind the scenes is when they're, if you think we're scrambling around to determine

and going back and forth and arguing over it whether to cancel or not, what are they doing at the PGA level? Oh yeah, I mean that's why we were in the scramble. It's because we're like four people down the game of telephone. But they also freaking do this all the time. Yeah. You know? Deal with weather?

Yeah. Lightning is their whole game, right? Yeah. Like rain they can handle and they'll play through a little bit of rain What courses are all like designed to be ready to do so yesterday? We're we're in the holding pattern. We were already starting at one instead of 1130 Whatever. I turned out to be a great day. I'm ready to go and I'm like, okay, I just got a free hour I'm gonna go to the sauna of course, which is what I do like, okay, I just got a free hour. I'm gonna go to the sauna Of course, which is what I do now. Yeah

And if you still do the cold Plunge stuff, I do cryo once a week. Okay, but not the wind off. I don't have I take a cold shower Okay, I don't have all most days. Okay, but I don't have like a cold tub you know, like some people can pull that off. But so I go there and first thing I'll tell you is, as I'm approaching sauna, there are two older men trying to get into the pool and somebody from the rec stopped them and they were like, no, lightning.

And we were like, what the, what do you mean? If we're inside? Well, that's a good question then. Cause when I talked to whoever in our chain it was like Jasmine or somebody was like oh she's all disgusted by it. If they just if they get lightning within 30 miles they have to stop for a half hour whatever blah blah blah you know how that is and same with youth sports. Yeah. So we have a list of things that are back under Trump. Yeah.

Or. Fucking around with lightning is what. I'm just saying we have a list, we should have a list of things that are possibly, didn't we, I predicted one the other day I can't remember what it was. Dodgeball. Dodgeball. Dodgeball. There is Blake. Hi Blake. I think dodgeball is coming back. It just hasn't been approved yet, but if I... Hasn't bubbled up the list. It will. If I called Trump and said, hey, what about, throw off a dodgeball tweet, he'd be like, hell yeah, that's great.

That's good. I will absolutely say dodgeball's back, then the White House will retweet it. Yes. That's how we lost Jewel. Did you see the White House tweet today? Which one was it? They retweeted a Photoshop picture of a, or maybe it's not Photoshop. Maybe Donald Trump dressed up as the Pope.

But it's hilarious, yeah. But yes, how about this woke lightning crap that we got to worry about with these kids' soccer games? Look, you're going to lose a kid or two. Across 180 million kids in the Navy, right? It's no big deal. And then how much tougher? To not delay me for another two hours just because

of one thing of lightning that I saw three towns over. Yeah, building society is all about trade-offs, and that's one I'm not comfortable with. And I don't think anyone is, even the parents of the kid who has to die because lightning delays are ridiculous. So yes, I'm going into sauna. You can't get in. And these older guys are probably 70, you're like, what do you mean?

Right, they never dealt with that. I'm old. They absolutely would hastily schedule a quick football game if they saw Lightning. And that lady at the rec might as well have been speaking Spanish, because they were like, it's inside, we're inside. She's like, I don't know what to tell you.

So I go into the sauna with them. And there's one other guy in there who's about my age. Now, the problem, as you know, breaking news. P-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p- The Roy twins have acquired their free drink tokens from Tito's handmade vodka and are off to the race. You can start the show. A hearty stack. Let's go. Start the show now.

Clayton, hit go. Hit the open. What if I say, would this be the silliest thing I've ever said? It's not noon yet. Oh, fuck. Oh, wait. What an asshole. So because of the lightning conversation being carried into sauna, now we're

talking in there, which is something, as you know, I don't like. Talking in a sauna. But it carried in. So now we're talking. Oh, yeah. We built in topping, too. You and these old.

Yeah. And they're ridiculous. And I'm playing into the I hate young people in Millennials thing, too. I was like, I don't. Dude, what are we doing? Put a skirt on it. And this is the problem.

There was another guy in there, like I said, a fourth guy who was my age and he was like, hey, big fan of the show. And here's the problem. That guy, he was looking at me knowing, he's like, I thought you said you didn't talk in the sauna. But this guy hears me over here just being, Oh, it was like this foot crazy, man. Like, I don't know. It's government's out of control too, right?

This guy was silent the whole time. He was just staring at you. Just kind of stared at me. He's like, big fan by the way. Like he knew, boy, you're being, was this at the end of the interaction? Okay. He let it go. Cause that would just cause those guys to be like, show. He was quiet about it. He let it go. Because that would just cause those guys to be like, show. He was quiet about it. Please explain to me. And they were old. And they were also really wrapped up in the lightning

thing. So they didn't even really catch wind of it. Because there's nothing worse than explaining to an old, well, I did it three other times today, and they were very confused. Extremely confused. Well, the guy ordering my veggie burger was like, what organization are you with?

And I'm like, dumb, dumb zone. No puppet. Yeah. What do I say? Your credentials has no puppet. I said no puppet. Yeah, you should. And then some lady next to me, she's like, he's with the podcast.

And he goes, oh, good. And back to lightning, yes, we were talking. We were like, there's a little lightning, but we were willing to send Clayton and Blake OK. Oh, good. And back to lightning, yesterday as we were talking, we were like, there's a little lightning, but we were willing to send Clayton and Blake in. Oh, absolutely. Yeah. To get set up. Yeah, they wouldn't let us set up so we could flip go.

Clayton's going to get zapped and come out speaking Mandarin. It could be amazing. That was a scenario we considered. Also, OK, if you knew you were going to fully survive, right? Totally fine. Wouldn't, I mean. Best story ever. Is that better than got bit by a shark, right?

Dude, I got effing hit by lightning. By far, if you're fully functional afterward, your best option. And what if all you have is a tiny lightning bolt scar on your forehead? Yeah. Like a bad ass perfect. Like that's kind of.

How cocky would you be? Right. And it would change your life, dude. If you survived that. Like that's kind of- Like a teardrop. How cocky would you be? Right. And it would change your life, dude. If you survived that. It would change your life, knowing. It's almost like you'd become president if a bullet grazed your ear. Could be. Do you want to have Golf Guy come over now?

Yeah, let's do that. We have a guy from Upswing Golf who is going to join us. I'm going to go with the Fusion Guy. I want you to see this guy's is going to join us. I'm going to both go with that fusion guy. I want you to see this guy's stuff though too. I do. Oh, Mike's leaving. Is he over there? Where do you think?

Where do you want him, Blake? Blake will direct him. No, no, no. The headset's down there. Which seat do you want him in? Oh, he's bringing a club. There he goes. OK. Yeah, this is a new to me bet. We know this one works. All right, they all work.

They all work. All right. Was that right? Hi, Kevin. Hey. You're going to move that towards your mouth there a little bit. All right, this is Kevin Mayo, correct?

Yes, sir. How are you guys? Doing great, man. Thanks for joining us today. Thank you. So Kevin is with Upswing Golf. Yes sir. Tell us.

Well, we launched a business called Upswing Golf, correct there, in January this year. We started with this idea to develop a fully adjustable premium kids golf set. Any entrepreneur will say that the first thing you ask is are you solving a problem and the problem in this case was parents buying kids clubs for their kids. They grow six inches overnight and they're like shoot I have to go buy a new set right. So my business partner

Justin Giles he calls me this is two and a half years ago, he's like, hey, my son Elliot's two years old. I wanna get him a set of clubs. And I'm looking at all the competitors out there, and I just don't wanna invest in this cash, and then have to buy him a new one. Does there exist an adjustable set? And I'm like, I don't think so. They have drivers, and he's like, well, could you do it for the whole set? I'm like, I don't think so. They have like drivers, you know. And he's like, well, could you do it for the whole set?

I'm like, yeah, absolutely. So two years later, we filed a patent for a tip adapter weight system that essentially as the shafts get longer, the tip gets lighter. So you kind of maintain a little bit of swing weight as the kids grow. So yeah, here we are.

We again, launched in January at the PGA show in Orlando, Florida, 2025. So you're not exchanging the clubs? No, no, no. So that's the beauty of it, right? There are some companies that as you're exchanging, if you may, you ship them back and they unglue it, cut it down, re-grip, re-glue, all that, right? ship them back and they they unglue it cut it down re-grip re-glue all that right we literally just take the same adapter that you see in adult drivers pop the head off you get longer shafts sent to you and what's called our growth kit look at that no the quality is fantastic I can't stop smiling now why is this so tiny I just got here what is? I like it. It just seems small. How old is Brooks?

Three. Too young? No, you're right there. So again, Justin Giles, my partner, his kiddo is three and change. He kind of holds like a hockey stick, right? But I mean, if you're getting to like a full golf swing, right, your four and five year olds is kind of where we're getting a little bit of wheelhouse start time. And yeah, like my son's five, right? You're four and five year olds is kind of where we're getting a little bit of wheelhouse start time.

And yeah, like my son's five, five and a half, and this is his driver. And it's fine. I think we joked secretly we wanted to do this so we could play golf on the weekends again. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Once you have kids, you have to. That's it, yeah.

The wife is like, oh, you can't leave for five hours during the day. Seven hours. Eight hours. Five day. Seven hours, eight hours. Five hours? Eight hours, right? Oh, I'm sorry. Let's talk about the round. Seven or eight hours.

But no, yeah, it's awesome. So we started out, we had three sets, right? It starts with a four piece, you get your driver, five hybrid, eight iron putter. All right, kiddo grows four or five inches overnight. Hey, I'm ready for the growth kit. We send you the four shafts that go to the previous set in the longer length and then you get three additional clubs with that. So now you're in the seven piece.

And then copy paste up to the 11 piece with the extra growth kit there. The whole point was we wanted to have a very premium offering for kids that there's other competitors that use aluminum and maybe not the best material. Yeah, that Clubhead. Yeah, I couldn't stop smiling when I looked at the Clubhead and I was like, oh, that's cool. Thank you.

Yeah, that's great. Full 6'4 Titanium with a two-piece casting, which is what you see in majority of adult and premium clubs, black PBD finish and the whole deal. We're like, actually it's funny when we first talked about it, he's like, dude, I didn't want you to make it look so good. I'm like, that's all we got. That's all we can do, right? So I appreciate that. That's cool. So no, it's exciting. We've had a lot of buzz. We just partnered with PGA Tour Canada. We

got a two year deal as of inks. This was like a few weeks ago. So we'll be on a lot of their marketing material and spread the word. It's a really cool concept that they said before it solves a problem. And yeah, we're really excited. Drinking through a fire hose right now for sure. When are you headed to Shark Tank? Well, we're not going to do that. We did, so it's fine. And if you did, you've signed it into EA and won't tell me. We can cut that out, right? We actually did talk to Cuban's group when we were going through our funding round.

He was pretty obvious. Series A or B? It was sort of an A. Way to go. Nice. I don't even know what that means. That's good, yeah. He actually was like, I don't like golf

Yeah, be a better deal for me than you guys But you know if you need cash we can do it and you know we were more strategic than that We partnered with a group the guys actually played college golf in Oklahoma State with Ricky Fowler He was his best man his wedding so these guys are tremendous. They've been a huge help and frankly You know Justin and I we're gonna fund 250 sets in our initial order, which was not cheap in that regard. And then we had the award. We won the most innovative product at the 2025 PGA show and we went from 250 sets to about 4,000 sets in like a month. PGA has got to love this.

Oh, awesome. The PGA, anything that grows the game. We're growing the game. Yeah, it's just fricking sick. Definitely. Yeah, awesome. That's any idea that the PGA just has to love? Oh, PGA, yeah. Anything that grows the game. We're growing the game. Yeah, it's just fricking sick. It's definitely. Yeah, it's brilliant. Yeah, we live, my wife Lauren and I, we live just north of the PGA Frisco. My son Mickey, he's actually our logo, the silhouette.

Oh, cool. He, what'd he say, he did the Ronnie, the Ronnie camp out there. And I was like, man, this is so cool. And like just the buzz, the excitement. I mean, ultimately we want to grow the game, get kids into more productive activities. I played games when I was a kid, like gamers, right? And it's just fun, it's healthy,

you're getting competitive at it. Get them off the streets. Get them out of the gangs. Off the puffing paints. Yeah. Up out of the gangs. Off the huffing paints. Yeah. Up here, all the gangs in Frisco. You don't want him to get into that lifestyle. Get him off the corner.

That's it. Oh, gosh. Yeah. Yeah. So what you're a great. Mike Storr is a great golfer. What could you shoot using that tiny club? I would do very poorly.

No, no, hold on. Give him the four set. What comes in the four, the junior four? The four set's a driver, five hybrid, eight iron putter. So what could Mikey, is Mike having to be on camera? Have you ever tried playing 18 with that tiny club? I did play one hole and I got a par. You got a par?

I did, I did. Okay. All right, here's a better one. I have no idea what that's you. Terribly. Let's say Scottie Scheffler has a 10-stroke lead going into Sunday, and you hand him these beautiful upswing clubs. Could he win? Could he hold off?

Who? Scottie Scheffler. No, but not us. Who's holding off? No, the field here. It's a CJ Cup, the 11th major. I don't think he could hold them off. Well, you saw Bryson did the one with that, right?

Yeah, Bryson does all kinds of bits. Yeah, but I think Scotty can play with anything. He would actually probably win by 11. I bet he'd- Whoa! So 100. 100. 100.

Scotty Homer. Increase the lead. I would bet he'd shoot a 75 or so, honestly. I mean, it's the exact same geometric volume that the driver he's using. He's tall, though, man. I am. That's a long way down. That long way down. It's about your arm length. Talk about growing the game put that on Sunday. Bring Dorf back. I'm in. Well

that's awesome man. Yeah those are really cool. You want to send it to send people to upswinggolf.com or what's your website right now? Yeah, www.upswinggolf.com. We are doing a promo at the CJ Cup. This is a pretty clever promo at CJ Cup Swing 10. 10% off. We're at pre-sale right now for the next couple weeks here. And yeah, no, we're getting everything landed here in about four to five weeks.

And yeah, so it's exciting. That's really cool, man. Really cool. Great idea. Thank you. Thank you very much. And for that reason, I'm in. Wait, how does the bag get bigger?

It's a different bag. It is a different bag. It grows 10 years, right? No, it's like you put it in water like those things your kids have. It's like the bag for the Incredible Hulk. Hold on, my lawyer's gonna... No, no, I'm sorry. We're good. It's a fair game. Well Kevin, it's nice to meet you man. You're welcome to hang out. Yeah, no thanks so much. We'll be around for sure and yeah any other questions you know reach out. We got our info at upswing golf.com any questions and cool Yeah, so that promo code in the show notes. Yeah guys. Thank you so much

Check back in soon about a year or so down the line. I'd love to hear the story Yeah, definitely. No, I think we talked to Julie that so we'll get something together. Good. Do that. So thanks so much guys I appreciate it. Go Go from thank you Would you start an idea what what training you start with there that's not I did miss the very first I'm sorry. Yeah. No, that's there's only just one training. No, I was not like a gin and tonic It's not like gin tonics. There's what it's what is it it? vodka gin Tito's vodka. I know it's a test what you pass Tito's handmade vodka ginger ale

A great little grape juice not grapefruit. This tastes like there's a little more citrus. Yeah so we may be Grape juice not grapefruit. This tastes like there's a little more citrus. Yeah so We may be Taking the wireless out here in a little bit Maybe play some tit-for-tat. I don't know starting to fill up a little bit dude. It's gonna be rocking stuff This is gonna be great. We have once we get to moving day. Yeah, so Come off TC is out here with us helping, and so is Marv the Cosmic Cowboy. Are you guys familiar with Marv?

I am. He's kind of our promotions guy. How do we know which one he is? He's decked out in a full caddy uniform. A full master's caddy uniform. Master's caddy uniform with the dumb zone on the back. He's trying to take a picture facing the other way. Number 69, and yes, people are just stopping him

to take a picture with him. That's the right thing to do. I guess that's our promotions table. There you go. We didn't even know it. Yeah, it's got stickers on it, a couple, you know, a mustache, everything you need. Yeah. Well I have a story I read this morning that I wanted to tell you guys about. I think it's interesting enough to be outside of the news. So can I just do it? Story outside of

the news, my God. So the New York Times has a story this morning. His name is about a man named Tim Fried. He's 57 and he is a man whose scientists believe he is a man may have identified antibodies that are capable of neutralizing the venom of multiple snake species. What? Scientists say maybe a step toward creating a universal anti-venom. Okay, finally. Okay.

Now, how did he do this? Well, over the last 20 years, he's either injected himself. Oh my God, okay. Or allowed himself to be bitten. No. 700 times. Jesus. He's micro to be bitten. No. 700 times. Jesus. He's microdosing.

He's microdosing. And then it's like, just see if this works? That seems... Yeah, so he carefully calibrates it and injects it. And then I guess whenever he does the actual bite, he tries to... Because there's a video. The article opens with a link to a two minute YouTube video

From 11 years ago of just some guy like in a spare bedroom at his house sounds a lot like the people I met at Repticon where he has I went to Repticon recently where he just has reptile Containers all around the wall, you know And he just takes out two of them, one of them a mamba, and he holds its head and he shoots it like heroin. What? He like, cash saw it.

The face of the mamba? Yeah, cash saw it. I thought you were talking about a needle. No, he holds it up and just like presses the back of the mamba's head. It's like a snake stapler. Yeah. He just goes bap, and then whoa, from my toes to my head,

I'm freaking out right now. Yeah, so they say that he's been doing this to try to, like he considers himself like a pseudo scientist, I guess. He put out a statement to the Times, I'm really proud that I could do something in life for humanity to make a difference for people that are 8,000 miles away that I'm probably never gonna meet never gonna talk to never gonna see He's of course talking about like people who live in places where there's a lot of venomous snakes He may be able to solve their problems

But the most big problem in those I imagine yeah Well, you know how a lot of snakes around your house like people die in Africa from snakes. I'm betting a lot Yeah, we have snakes but yeah, not snake deadly poison deaths in the neighborhood. Yeah. Yeah a Guy with a company called centivax said this is a bigger problem than the first world realizes this is a bigger problem than the first world realizes. Right. They desperately need some sort of universal antivenom. But does the first world care that much about the third?

Well, I mean. Not these days. Well, it depends. I mean, there's organizations that like, exist to keep people from dying from AIDS. Yeah, but they're defunded. And exist. Yeah, let's defund them.

I know, but mosquito nets. Yep. It was George Bush. So here, 81,000 to 138,000 people die from snake bites annually. Whoa. Where? Everywhere?

Globally. Where? Everywhere? Globally. OK. But I bet you, like India and- Worldwide, an estimated 5.4 million people are bitten by snakes annually.

Jesus. We gotta stop these snakes. I feel like India's probably got a snake situation. India has a major snake situation. Yeah, that's a major talking point going into the country. 58,000 per year in India is the highest. So how about them, Dan? Do you not care about the Indians?

I do like Indian ladies, so yeah. Who doesn't? That's such a weird, like, nobody's clicking that. Yeah, for some reason I do. You do? I don't know, like, you'll occasionally see one that's like, ooh, Muslim, and it's supposed to be like racy. But Indian is just a, it's interesting.

She's super kind so anyways this vax company take it for what it is has done a study that says that cocktails of the anti toxins may successfully prevent deaths and injuries from all snake families so it's a pretty interesting story that this guy just decided this is his life. His first snake encounter was a harmless bite by a garter snake when he was in kindergarten. And he became fascinated with the snake. See, he does have that crazy eye when he gets bit.

And it looks like he's high. Yeah, he has crazy eye. It looks like he's high. Yeah, he has crazy eye. It looks like he's high. He's just floating around the room. He didn't begin dabbling with snakes, quote, in earnest until about the year 2000. At one point around then, his basement housed 60 venomous snakes. But here's where things get weird. His experiments

nearly ended soon after they began. No way. On September 12th, 2001, Can I guess? crazed by the terrorist attack of the previous day and by the death of a friend a few days earlier, he let himself be bitten by two cobras Double barrel both arms, which I find I don't care any more to be the most insane series of words

I've ever heard right so he's sitting there on 9-eleven Jesus distraught. He's watching Matt Lauer and he's already or first he's already like Jeff died The world is over Jeff died. He had Ed McCaffrey on his pants Yeah, he was a huge bad radio He won waiting to see here the second half of the Jim Brown the Jim Brown interview that never aired He's sitting there. He's watching Matt Lauer, the second tower, plane hits the tower, and he's like, I'm doing the snake thing tomorrow. Or does he already have it lined up?

Like if right now I said tomorrow I need you to figure out if you can be bitten by- Well it was after a night of restless, if he even slept at all. Sure. What with the 9-11. Just doesn't know what's the world going to be like, you know, as we move forward. And does it all matter? And that's your origin story?

Like, some people went to the recruitment office. Like, my brother was like, he moved to join the military. This guy's like, I'm going to solve snake bites. Hoo-yah. You're weird. Different kinds of heroes, man. Joel Janesta went looking for edible berries. And right, wasn't he just camping and

Yeah, and he had recorded The Simpsons. And that's how he found out about it. But it's just a weird thing to throw into the story. Like, okay, there's this interesting guy trying to solve snake bites by getting bit. And you're not going to believe this, but he wasn't going to do it until Al Qaeda

attacked the financial district. Yeah. Everybody's got their own flashpoints. So this is a silver lining to the whole terrorist attacks of September 11th. That's right. The best thing about 9-11. And if you really think about it, if this does turn into an anti-venom that works for throughout history, and you're saving 81 to 138,000 people per year? It's more than 9-11. He might be a god. He might be a god.

Per year. Yeah, so this article says that after he did the 9-12 double bite, he had not built up enough immunity. After the first bite, he was fine, but after the second, he he felt cold his eyes started to droop and he couldn't talk he woke up in a coma or from a coma four days later oh wow and that at that moment he was like this is it I want to keep this is it well he was alone that was his first time or he got to a hospital I blacked out and woke up from a coma in a hospital. His wife was furious. Dan, it says here that when you have a snake bite, an increased sense of well-being, blurred

vision, giddiness, intense persistent euphoria, intense state of arousal. Sounds kind of great. I know. Yeah. You need Snake. Dude, what if that's all this really is, is this guy figured out how awesome this high is, and he's like, I'm a scientist. I'm helping the world. I'm working on it.

I'll try to do this. I'll be down in the basement in my lab, and he's just like Brandy from South Park, like with the cheese or whatever, just down there. Hit me. Hit me. Again. Come on, you pussies. Yelling at the snake. from South Park like with the cheese or whatever just down there hit me hit me again come on you pussy's yelling at the snake juice it up it's like a very interesting human story that video has been out there for 11 years the YouTube video so they can isn't his body that is just changing you're saying they're creating another thing that can be replicated in a lab?

So they sampled his blood and they basically have said that the fact that he's carefully dosed so many different antivenoms might actually work as a universal, like it has enough different types of venom in it. So if this was COVID, they would fast track it and all the snakes would be not a problem anymore. That's right.

But now we got an Operation Warp Speed-Up. Now we got to test it. Got to have placebo. There'd be a lot more Indian ladies. Yeah, Dan. So everywhere. By the way, you mentioned doing the Indian lady search. That's all he's been thinking about for the last time.

No, I heard a single word. I thought it was interesting. No, you can't do that because you then get over Indian lady. Like, you know, like if you search cowboy, like if you're a lady who likes cowboys, you don't necessarily like one that's in the whole get up, right? So yes, not a Pocahontas.

I'm talking about Dot. But that also would be the, they don't know that. So you're going to have to sift through that already. But it's all in a big getup and full, as if they were just at an Indian wedding. You're more amateur than pro. But just that you're an Indian, that's your origin. You don't have to then also be dressed up

in the traditional garb of having lived in India yeah you can just that can be your org that's my thing yeah what's your search that's what I'm saying full Indian yeah well I'm saying you can't search any how do you clarify it Yeah, yeah. That's a long search. Oh! Oh! It sounds like an A. Yeah, yeah, yeah! Mike Savoia, he should have taken the wireless right then. Now we need to just make sure he knows. He needs to be on the move.

Yeah, let's get Mike over there. I got it. Anyways, we break into Indian coverage for golf. Yeah, we're seeing what's going on here. I think though you're describing an interesting point which is a way to make it less racist. Yeah. Because if you had the whole- You're making it more racist. By putting, like, what is this?

Halloween? Right. They got the sparkly, you know, the, what do you call that? I know all of it. Type of a tattoo that's temporary, but it's Yeah, the Hanna tattoos. I had to spring in action. I thought happened All right, it was merely a birdie from the bunker Mike is on the did you see me jump you ever seen me move that fast the wireless?

No, the golf excitement just charged through his veins. Yeah, I thought we had a hole-in-one That sounded like a possible hole-in-one, but it was a birdie. It was a birdie to all right Mike's on the wireless The golf excitement just charged through his veins. Yeah, I thought we had a hole in one. That sounded like a possible hole in one, but it was a birdie, it was a birdie two. All right, Mike's on the wireless. So today's goal is to find, for us, for me, the largest discrepancy between an old man and a young woman.

Okay. How about the other way around? That's what Dan wants to find. The older woman. So just walk up to a couple that you think is a little bit older, the guy's a little bit older. OK.

And just be like, hey, what's going on? How are you guys? How'd you meet? How old are you? I'm on it. I'm on it. Oh, some girl just saw you guys and just sprinted. Hi, pretty girl.

Great for cash. She saw cash. She's ignoring. Oh, I love you. Hi, how you doing? What's going on? Hugging. That's Rachel.

20 years, I've been a. I don't want to give. I mean. Oh, a second hug for Cash and a kiss. No, I mean our ratings are pretty good. I don't know. Cool. What were you on? Radio.

A tepid wave towards Dan and Jake. As she goes in for a, get a third hug. Cash to rolling. All right. Joining us now. Why'd you have to take the headset off? Give her her own headset. Yeah, I mean damn.

You moron. Now we're back on. Hi guys. Hey, who are you? How we doing? Tell them who you are. Who you work for. Why are you hugging Cash Saroy?

I work for Tony Fay PR. Okay. You know Tony Fay, that guy? Absolutely. Damn straight. We're out here, we're repping Choctaw. We're out here supporting the Byron. I'm getting escorted around by red pants. You're an escort?

To check out these activations. Whoa. No, the red pants are escort. Oh, he's an escort. What'd they say? I want to make sure that's very clear. The red pants are actually just in escort. OK, we were just about to talk about Bill Belichick.

Yeah. It was weird. That's what I can. I'd like to chime in on that, actually. Can we do that? Is she an escort? Here's the deal. There's a couple ways we could skin this cat.

Aren't they all ladies? Oh. Well, that's not. She's not dumb. I'll tell you that. She's not dumb. She's bad at PR. That's your game.

The fact that no one actually knows the origin story, she might be very good at it. Yeah, maybe she's a genius. She's actually doing all this stuff on purpose because she's basically his publicist. Make everyone. Oh, she's fully operating. She's actually doing all this stuff on purpose because she's basically his publicist make everyone Oh, she's fully Oh of his she's fully operating in a comms role and I feel like she's watching it The outfits are rough. We need to start with a stylist and then work backwards. Yeah, you know her mom owns a sex shop

Bible swear is that true? Yeah, a hundred percent sure According to the New York Times. I have not seen that. Cape Cod or something. Yeah. In Cape Cod? Well, that makes sense. I love it. I love it. Well, that makes sense. Yeah.

A weekend getaway dildo shot. Well, now that's a good story unpacked. Now I'm interested. Yeah. Yeah. I just don't know that making the world hate you and your client is like. You know, I saw her in Mitter at NFL Honors.

Did you? Yeah. And I thought, bold. You know, I saw her in Mitterant NFL honors. Did you? Yeah, and I thought, bold, you wore a bikini. But you know, in my mind, it's like she knows he'll be gone in 20 years for, you know, any death. Death. It's a power grab. Three years. It's a power grab.

And eventually, you know, this is only the beginning of her life and her career. Oh, yeah, you're right. TC and I think she'll be hosting like Good Morning America in 10 years. Oh my God. That's terrifying. Oh my God. Also not out of the question.

Not out of the question, but she's not really good at PR, but she is good at making people pay attention to her. It's like the Kardashian method over and over again, guys. I know this. Well she had to get like. The demographic for y'all isn't female necessarily, but that's the game.

Yeah, but if you think about it though, it's a more respectable, and I have no problem with Kim Kardashian, but the origin story is kind of getting boned on camera. Would you watch a Belichick sex tape? No. Maybe. Of course I would.

I want to see how she navigates. Oh, so we're all interested. It's a logistical thing. It's only in his, it might be out there. It's just for study.. It's only in his head. It might be out there. It's just for study. But it's only a matter of time. It's so funny that when you asked that question, I didn't even consider her.

All I thought about was him. No, I don't want to watch it. That's why I said yes. I'm just very negative. I want to see Bill's. Oh, yeah. It's not about her. Can you please?

Forget that. Because his ex-girlfriend was older, not his age, but she was older and very attractive She had another older dude, too, right? That's new that's a new story that I just saw her last boyfriend was 64 years old She has a big dick Mitch. No is that guys? I need to do a deep dive. I've been so distracted with the Blake Lively of it all y'all are actually real You're in the bill check business. I saw that story on the Off Rim like three months ago and decided not touching it.

I did too. Looks like too fucking much. The ladies are mad. It's a deep dive. It's a women thing. It looks like it's becoming political. And I just said, keep on going. I did.

Would you watch AI? I don't want to know who Justin Baldoni is. I don't know who he is. I'm so with you, dude. Just keep it moving. He's a very sensitive man. That's what I've heard. Would you watch it?

He's a very sensitive. What does that mean? I don't know. I met him in person again. What it means is this. Very tight and true. Is that like 90% of the dudes who are way out front, white knighting for women, like, can you believe we live on women,

are dirtbags. And he's that? And he got caught. He's overcompensated. No, she thinks he's great. I support women, but I don't need to wear it on my sleeve every day, right? Like, he overdoes it a little bit.

You got a good hot take, because that was my feeling. He was actually speaking to 1,000 women at a benefit on domestic violence as a beneficiary. And he was speaking, and I thought, ooh, I don't know about this guy. He was leaning into him, he's like, all men need to work on themselves, you know. The whole thing, he's got his rhetoric.

He's speaking to his base. They broke him down. Can I let you know that earlier when you said, or not you, but we're talking red pants. Yeah, somebody was like, yeah, the red pants can show you in here, this one's for the red pants. But the first three times I thought they were saying red panda and I was super confused. They're like, yeah, the red pants could show you in here. This one's for the red pants. But the first three times I thought they were saying red panda

and I was super confused. They're like, this is excited. They're like, the red panda gets you this one for $60,000. I was like, what the? They wheel red panda out on the first team. I'm like, I get it. Bring the people in. I was excited.

On the other side of this wall, you got a red pant DJing. Oh, really? They do it all. They're escorting. They're doing mulch at 4 AM. You really got to stop using that word. Yeah. What it all. They're escorting, they're doing multiple AMs. You really gotta stop using that word. I know. What's an altar? They're hosting. They're guiding. They're guiding. Volunteers. Yeah. Okay. Assisting. That works. Hey, thanks for joining us. 64 year old Josh Zuckerman. Right. That's the yellow one. Told TMZ, my former girlfriend is wise beyond her years more than any other 20-something

I've ever met in my life. Why do you know so many of them? Narrative about her character is not fair to her. Yeah, I thought she's been dating Belichick for like three years and she's 24. Yeah. So she wasn't that much 20-something dating this guy, right? Wise beyond her years. Yeah. Yeah. Do you think the dating this guy, right? Wise beyond her years. Yeah.

Yeah. You think the judge is like, well. Well. So you saw her when she was wearing this. We gave her an aptitude test, and she's wise beyond her years. Is that the silver bikini? Sorry, yeah. Let's see.

Yeah, you met her while she was wearing that? Yeah. She pulled a Bezos' girlfriend. And you're like, whoa. Yeah. I couldn't tell if she was, honestly, I think she was in on the bit. I think she crushed it.

Guys, she's two steps ahead. She's not dumb. All right, so you like her. Would you watch a Nick Saban sex tape? I would never, never. Too much respect for, what's his wife's name? I've already forgotten. Miss Terry.

Yeah, Miss Terry. Would never. Okay. But Belichick, yes. In Miss Terry, we trust. Like, let's just be honest. Matriarch. And Miss Terry we trust. Yeah. Okay, how about Shannon Sharp? I know you're not looking at me because I'll watch all of it. You told me you'd watch them. I'll watch Belichick, Saban, and Shannon Sharp together. I don't care. I'm interested. Well, on that note guys, thanks for having me. Alright, well good luck.

Thank you for stopping by. I love an overshare and a headset. Everybody get to your Chalk Talk Rush. Enjoy the day. It rained, Rainbow's out. It's beautiful. Y'all are the best. Hey, thanks. Thank you. Show ender there. Great seeing you. That was fun. That was awesome. Are the Rainbows out?

Thank you. I don't know. I don't know how they work. I bet you saw a Rainbow. I think that's probably where that was rooted Enjoy your escort. I Don't see any big gaps. What's the girls name Belichick and Jordan Jordan Hudson Jordan Hudson? Yeah So I'm gonna try to find a Belichick Hudson relationship. Yeah, I mean that's a big I think boy gap I think across the way you're gonna find more Over there. Well, I don't know. That's also like-

What are you saying? Like based on money? Yeah, company bought suites. Do you bring your- I don't know if you do. To the company. I mean the truth is, cash has been in way more of those situations than we have.

Yeah, I think in general that's- Cause it probably, you know what, it pisses off the regular life of like- A little too public. Yes. You know your buddy Who's still with his battle axe right? That's this is like her day Yeah, you're like you really have to bring Krista right

Or you have her kind of meet you there. Oh, you just kind of run into her again. There you go. That's weird Mike it's kind of hard every dude out here is interchangeable Every male here is interchangeable. They all look like Mike Saroy. Yeah, this guy got here So they're just talking to click during the show and see what they got. All right, we'll say hi to these guys Hey, you guys just fans of click you guys just fans of engineer Clayton fans of what engineer Clayton? No, we were just wondering how many types of chargers he had back there because we had a vaporizer that is now dead. Let's see that bad boy.

You don't want to see it. Not in the state of Texas. I would show it to you. Just bring it over here. We're not, what are you? And he did not offer you a charger that you need to go. I have a Weed Pin. He said we're all USB-C here.

I have a Weed Pin on me. I saw something on Twitter. Get an Elite Rides DFW. They have all we USB. He said we're all USB C here. I have a weed pin on me I saw something on Twitter elite rides DFW. They have all chargers Yeah, well available those wires. He has to have a mic on Twitter somewhere, right? I would think so and he just denied you said no, what's your fair enough? I've said before but I'll keep pressing on Clayton also was recently struck by lightning and only speaks Mandarin So he probably didn't understand you Very very sorry about that. I am NOT fluent in Mandarin So next time I need to recharge a vape it'll only be in English in the USA All right, good luck, and if you get that thing charged come find us

And we found one Hey, hey who's still Who cares? We don't care about it. I thought they were interested. Your hero is the dumb zone. You need to subscribe now to the dumb zone. Right. Who's still saying vaporizer? He went formal with it.

Okay, if he gets them to subscribe, then I'm out. Right. All right, now I'll make him get his phone out and subscribe. Do it right now. What do we want? On YouTube or what do we? No, make him pay. Yeah, he needs to buy yearly patron on the dumb zone or

picture go to dumb dot com okay yeah dumb zone dot com alright now as part of the deal we need you to go to dumb zone dot com right now to subscribe yeah to the podcast you're enjoying right now stealing electricity from he's gonna do it right now he's got his phone on. That's the price! It's not stealing, it was offered. Yes! A deal! I'm not interested in this anymore. Take the thing back! Get my cable back. No, no, it's fine. Let him charge it and then let's just move on. The other thing I saw, or yeah, at least get a YouTube sub. I tried. Jake wasn't interested. Alright, he's gonna do it. Look! He's going on his phone.

Alright! What'd you see? Twitter? I tried. Jake wasn't interested. He's gonna do it, look. All right, he's doing it. He's pulling up his phone. We're getting a YouTube clip. What'd you see? Twitter? Oh, just one of those things of I can't believe how kids, how easy kids have it these days type thing. But it was I can't believe people used to smoke out of a, Pepsi can or an apple and then have a snuggie in a toilet paper roll. My whole life you're talking about. Now kids are pulling out a little vape pen out of their pocket, hitting it real quick

and then they're done. Like this guy. Subscribe. He didn't want to show us his vape. Yeah, thank you. You know what that is cool though Is that that means there's a good days we subscribe one subscriber all right? There's a space dividends You're welcome

That means there's a space if you're like in high school or college or something where you could be cool by burning real flower Like I bet if there's there's a guy in a high school is like oh cool, dude You smoke a vape? Awesome. But he knows how to roll a joint. Yep. Like do you remember in American Pie, the way that the dorky kid was going to bone Stifler's mom is he drank liquor.

Like everybody wanted to be cupped for the keg. And he's like, these are boys. So I bet there's a kid out there, a group of dudes who are like, yeah, man. I don't need a rolling machine. Just give me a dollar bill. I got two knives and a Mountain Dew two liter. That was my move. It feels like drugs too. Anytime you're involving a heating unit, it really starts to feel like drugs. The coil on the kitchen,

oh yeah, the burner, oh yeah, two knives on that, oh yeah, oh dome. That's why when you catch your kid doing something nefarious can't be that mad. You got to remember yourself. I Think ladies tend to forget They either forget or they weren't like I know your your your wife had a brother But they just weren't like intimately involved in male youth and just how insane it is. Even lady stuff. I mean, I know about my wife, what she was doing in college, but I know what some of the other ladies I was associating with in college were doing. Like if you ever said, your kid will be doing that someday. Like all these respectable looking-

Yeah, it seems unnatural, but it's very natural. Yeah, 40 something wives were all- Hell wives. Yeah. We're all going nuts. Listen, when you have your 22 and you have your tongue in the behind of someone you just met, the last thing you want to be thinking is, yeah, my kid will probably be in the exact same situation on the other end of this one day. That's why you have to do those things drunk.

Yeah. So you aren't thinking about your future kid. Exactly. And then tomorrow morning, you're just like, boy, that was awesome. Yeah. Oh my god. It's true. And you're ignoring her.

Nobody can live like that. Now you're ignoring her in the cafeteria the next morning, pretending you weren't together. That's a mutual agreement. Yeah. Then nobody wants to acknowledge any of that. God, you just put me in a time warp. It's going mutual agreement. Yeah, then nobody wants to acknowledge any of that. God you just put me in a time warp It's gonna happen. Yep

Instantly cash had his open his eyes. It was like oh my god Hit me got a sports hypothetical email nice kind of directed at you Blake okay, if Blake softball starting nine played defense for one inning against the Rangers How many runs would they allow, uh, allow before they were able to get three out? These Rangers? Zero because they can't hit right now. Waka, waka, waka, waka. Are they throwing a softball?

Well, now that's, yeah, that wasn't detailed. What do you mean? Do you get a professional pitcher? Yeah, I think you have to. Let's say you do, but he throws 70. They put it in play. Yeah, like you get it. You get a opportunity, replacement level

bullpen pitcher or something. Yeah, just somebody that's. He's not going to be mowing people down, but the ball will be put in play every time, and it won't be home runs. Like a home run doesn't count, let's say that. It's not gonna be mowing people down, but the ball will be put in play every time. And it won't be home runs. Like a home run doesn't count, let's say that. So they're gonna have to put it in play. Like even a fly ball wouldn't be caught, right? That at outfield is so much bigger

than everyone besides Blake thinks it is. It's a lot of ground to cover. The ball's hanging in the air for a while. You have 13 people or whatever softball does. Did you ever have a major league caliber person hit you a ground ball? No, but I remember catching a pop fly from Kinsler when we played against when he played on Jack White's team.

And I was amazed at how high and long the ball stayed in the air. It is different. Yeah, that's true But a ground ball is like a million miles an hour at you. I can like you would not Hoover that oh my god, you You would be so hurt even if you fielded it you'd be hurt like you would actually be surprised that it's in your glove And then there's no way you make the throw to first base. Because yeah, they'll beat out any ground ball. Yeah, that's true.

Before you could actually throw it. That's true. Who was telling us the other day they had their kid run the ball to the base? Oh. Somebody was telling us. It was funny, and I's like the most chill, just nothing moves the needle guy ever.

And then we started talking about coaching his six-year-old girl's soccer team or whatever age, and he got really animated. I was like, here it is, dude. And he's like, so I got this thing, and he started telling me about something that I didn't know about. And I was like, oh, I'm gonna be a soccer player.

And he was like, oh, I'm gonna be a soccer player. And I was like, oh, I'm gonna team or whatever age. And he got really animated. I was like, here it is, dude. And he's like, so I got this thing. And he started telling me about something that I'm like, I've seen someone do this to us, which is he's like, the only thing they know is throw the ball in quick. Have you got one?

Give her something down there. That's that one. Yeah. So his whole bit is just like, take the ball. When we have a throw in, throw it at the goal. It her something down there. That's that one. Yeah. So his whole bit is just like, take the ball when we have a throw in, throw it at the goal. It was after the Rangers. And everybody just chills and stands there.

So is it bad form to have your little league infielders just run the ball to first base? Interesting. And would Blake have to do that and just hope for pop flies or ground balls in the vicinity of a tagout base. I'm thinking that the Rangers score infinity runs. There's no way. No, maybe not infinity, but no, they've run into some every right-handed hitter is going

to hit the ball to Blake. It's just a matter of can he feel the ball and get it to first base. I mean, he's going to have the best chance on his team, but it's still not going to be a great chance. I mean, he's going to have the best chance on his team, but it's still not going to be a great chance. I believe in Blake. I think we could get 27 outs at some point. It's only three. It's one inning.

Yeah, it was one inning. One inning? That's what I'm saying. Oh my god. Yeah. If they wouldn't score infinity, I predict 1,000. They wouldn't score infinity. Oh, one inning, we could hold them under 10.

I think quite easily. Joining us now for the bomb game is a pop Emily Jones Queen do you yell how what's your level of yell at youth sports? Um, it's it's moderate As a matter of fact, I'm watching in game changer right now We have it is it is Just came from a Hattie's volleyball game. Very intense three set. How did we do?

Did we get it done? We did. Got the win. We're over hand serving now. It's big development. Oh my god. Did Hattie get the game winning point? She did not.

Flying above the net, slow motion spike. She served like a boss today. Do we kill yet? How old is she? They're trying. She's 12. No, 11. I mean about to be 12. How many girls that were previously boys are her opponents? None so far but it's early. That you know. We're only in fifth grade. The pandemic. How would you react if her team was getting smoked? So we get, I get a call the other day. I don't know how you guys like the amount of

correspondence that we get from the school is so next level. That's a lot. I mean it's recorded voicemails all the time. Just let me know when there's a shooter. Yes, so the most recent one is to please tell your kids to keep, this is for my seventh grader, keep your stuffed animals at home. Who's bringing, what seventh and eighth graders are bringing stuffed animals to school?

Well, apparently they're furry, furry furries. Well, they call them that, but what happened is we did away with bullying. Yeah, now there's just an unchecked marketplace of kids not being told they suck. We did away with bullying. I mean, it's sad. There's a trade off and everything.

The other day, I swear to God, I was telling TC this. My daughter is so picky right now to a degree that I was picky. I know it's worse than other kids. It's bad. And her lunch was a biscuit with peanut butter on it. That's what she wanted. And she got home and she'd eaten about half of it. She's like such-and-such said my lunch looks like a dirty diaper.

And I was like that's cuz it does that shit is disgusting. I was like your lunch looks gross and people are going to continue to make fun of you until you start to eat the stuff the other kids do. I was like I'll pack you pizza, macaroni, whatever, but if you keep eating crusty biscuit with old peanut butter people are gonna be like that looks disgusting. Right, yeah. So bully them a little. Yeah, there's a balance there, right? I mean I told the story when I was on with Donovan Lewis, our friend from the ticket.

They were talking about nicknames. I mean, I ran through Gorilla because I was hairy and Dishpan ass because I had no butt and then Mosquito Bites because I had no boobs. Oh my God. And so... Triple crown. But yes. But I feel like that shit prepared me for what I was gonna deal with from people like you.

Yes. What? Don't look at me. I'm looking at Dan. She's staring it down. I mean, yes, I'm burning a whole bright in Dan's skull right now. But yeah, I mean, there is a certain level level of and I think it's as parents to we've become so soft and so

Hovery and protective and you know what's weird though is it I had it too. It was the bulge You know I'm like It was it was so painful so embarrassing brutalal. So embarrassing. Brutal. Where were they looking when they said that? Everywhere he went. Where were they looking? There he is, old bulgy. Old bulgy.

Here he comes. I don't get it. What were they talking about? I don't know. I don't get it either. Did he have a belly or something? Doesn't make any sense. I just don't know.

Just didn't like it. If you got divorced right now, how old are you? 47. It sounds awful. How old? No, it doesn't. I'm 40 this year. To date again?

Well, yeah. Go through that whole process? Just stay with me. Play along. OK. How old would you go? Oh, not very. Really?

Oh, yeah. Because that's my favorite thing about coming to golf tournaments. Oh, yeah. There's a lot of that. Let's find some Jordan Hudson, Bill Belichick. Maybe 55. I mean, I'm 47. I need to make sure everything still works and looks right.

You're very superficial. Very. Yeah. Very. Whereas guys aren't like that. Oh, not at all. No. Not at all.

Yeah, I had a six foot minimum when I was dating. I wouldn't date anyone under six foot. How tall are you? Five seven. And I think it's because I wanted to feel small. Hell yeah. Did they have to be extra hairy too? What did I say?

I don't even get that one. No, it's just a great sense. This is metal as fuck. It's just a great sense. Did they have to have a beard and long hair? But also, I started thinking, because my mom's 5'7", and I immediately was like, is mom trying to get domed? Why is my stepdad so tall?

Yeah. Stuff. But so is it a normal, like, after 55, should I expect it to look bad down there? You're saying you had to, like, is it? I mean, I think gravity- I never saw my crimp- Gravity's undefeated.

Gravity, gravity starts to take, my dad used to wear whitey tighties around the house, which was very unstable now that I look back on it. As the father of two girls raising us by himself. With a smoke? Actually, you're spot on. I love this guy. Yeah. Actually, you're spot on. I love this guy. Yeah, yeah.

So yeah, things just start. He was bulgy also. I am. Bulgy guy. Yep. There's not much you can hide in Tidy Whities. No. There's not a whole lot of mystery there.

Dude, when I was young I was laying on my back like in the living room of our grandparents house and my grandma stepped over me in like a whatever grandma's wear with nothing underneath. It's just a frozen moment in my life. Is she not wearing underwear? No. Okay. It's Florida. Yeah, it's Florida. Flowing. But I will say like... Wait, is that the first time, so that must be the first time? So that must be the first time you ever saw one in person. Yes. Was it like a, as if a tumbleweed had popped over you and- Yes.

But it was covered by a big dress. It was just a flash that I'm pretty sure I saw. No cash? This is killing me. I don't think I ever- I don't feel like I've ever heard this story. I feel like I have not heard this story. Whistle at you a little bit.

I feel like. It's like watching a 3D movie. Nothing fell out of there. OK. She was old. Yeah. She was old. Yeah.

I feel like there's not a whole lot. A little puff of dust. Pretty. No, either way. I mean, male genitals are not attractive. God, I'm sweating. No. No.

Do you think that Bill Belichick ever sent Jordan Hudson a dick pic? 100%. I missed that. Whoa. 100%. I haven't. No way. But I didn't online date.

No way. So I didn't really. You don't think so? No. Oh, I bet he did. No, because that's a move. Well, I'm conflicted there. No, that's an early move where, yes, youth certainly plays a part. Like three, four years ago, did he?

He's not dressing up as a pirate, the fisherman with the mermaid before her. Right. I like, he's jumping into a role. Yeah. If she requested it, I'm certain he did it. Yeah! Yeah. I thought absolutely no and talk myself out of it

I mean, I can't I just the thought of having sex with Bill Belichick Would you watch the sex tape? Oh, that's our question of the day. Would you watch it? No, of course I would gross no What about I would watch a sex tape? I'm not watching bill Belichick. What about Nick Saban and miss Terry? No, no If I'm not watching Bill Belichick. What about Nick Saban and Miss Terry? No, no, no. If I'm going to watch somebody else do it. What about Hillary Clinton? No, I want her to be hot. Condoes are right. Someone you respect. No, no, no.

Wash. I want her to be, no. Oh, God. Wash. Wash. Kamala and wash. Wash and the Asian lady. Yeah, wash and the Asian reporter. Stop.

Stop. Oh, my God. Lady yeah washing the Asian reporters Yeah him him afterward Laying in bed What would he say we're here again with Emily What do you say I don't know I did my part I teed it up You grab the upswing club and knock it down the fairway We're here again with Emily. I don't know I did my part. I teed it up You grab the up swing club and knock it down the fairway Would it be cool? If your daughter was dating Bill Belichick, I think it'd be great if mine was

Why fucking Bill Belichick, bro? You get to learn good. Yeah, can you imagine? I would be very dinner and then we're watching the game afterwards with Bill Belichick. Yeah, he seems like a real peach to be around. And he can rail my dog. Whatever. Whoa. Hey.

Hey. Hey. It's her choice? It is her choice. You don't really believe that. You're doing it. Because your kids are in college now, aren't they? Although, he's still got to rent a car for her.

Right? She cannot rent a car. So you'd still have to do that, yeah. Are your kids in college? Yeah. Have you ever walked in on them getting railed? You did say it. You did.

You opened door, John. You definitely opened the door. I have never walked in on anyone getting railed in any situation, no. What about making out? No. Do they do that? Necking.

I don't know. Necking. I'm not that into their personal lives. Okay. But if they brought home Bill Belichick, I'm on board. Yeah. Just somebody, not like- I have to get the fine china.

Can you imagine the awkwardness between Dan and Bill Belichick? Hey man. Like I'm not on board with Andy Reid. I don't want Andy Reid brought over. He's brought some food No, it just doesn't feel you eat meat Spill Belichick. It's you're you're the one who's has a hard-on for him. I think it would be very check

I think about this. I think he's a bad guy. I don't think he's a good person agreed I got all you like Indian ladies. So I don't know if that's Yeah, no, I don't think he's a great guy or anything, but you know. So that's it. It's just... He's the architect of seven Super Bowl winners. And he, his franchise value went to whatever. Yeah, I think he, I'm sorry, I'm having a hard time focusing right now because I'm imagining Bill Belichick having sex. Yeah. Yeah, but you're on board with seeing it yeah now we talked earlier that the the new story is that Jordan Hudson had a 64 year old boyfriend previous to Bo Belichick really yeah so this is her bit yeah this is her bit very successful at it he was successful too and

He was successful too. And now there's another story out today. Let's see, who is this? This story is fascinating though. Culturally, you could not make it up. You could not make it up. I can't stop thinking about it. He's maybe the last person, right? He is the last person.

Being this. Yes. And a girl who's involved in screwing up interviews and overbearing and maybe controlling him? Okay, yeah, that's what I'm saying. So what if the roles were reversed and this was a dude yapping from the back during the interview that we're not talking about this. And it's like Martha Stewart or something? Aren't we like, oh, he's taking advantage of her.

A hundred percent. She's got Alzheimer's. At summit. Yeah, basically imagine it's like... At summit. 100% she's got Alzheimer's. Yeah basically imagine it's like so it's Pat's summit and it's like you know some YouTube looking kid okay he's like 22 and he's jumping in. Hey, we're not asking. Bro, bro, bro, bro, uh-uh. Pat's not getting into how we met. He's a little... Not today. Uh-uh. She's not alive, is she? Didn't she die? I was...

Didn't want to bring it up. Why don't we go with Martha Stewart? She died the same day as Buddy Ryan. A coaching great we were looking for. Who will forget? Let's do Kim Mulkey. Kim Mulkey. Oh, yeah. That's a good one. Okay, her getting dominated is about as likely as Bill Burr. Right, yeah. You think it makes telling her what to do?

Right, the guys wearing a tank top, a gold shim. No, I'm not taking off his boa. Like a gold shim string tank top. Like what would be the equivalent, yeah, to the mermaid photo, like Pat Summits dressed like Moana. Pat Summits dressed like Moana. Pat Summitt dressed like Moana. Move along from Pat Summitt. She's not with us.

I know, but. She left us, tragically, I think. 2016. Why is that tragic? How is it tragic? I don't know. You're winning as coach ever. Her chute didn't open.

OK. That would be tragic, right? She stepped over Mikey and off the cliff. Have y'all seen any heels roaming around here? No, I see sensible though. Oh. These girls are doing the. Get it, girl.

Get it. Get it. Get it. You're up now, Wimbledon. Do you want to take the wireless out and interview people? Sure. Yeah. Emily on wireless. I love that. Emily wireless. Steve, Steve. Do better than I did. Go find us women who are looking for a man.

Okay. Yeah. Who's on the market? No one's on the market? No, no one's on the market, but. Is that how that works? I'm always on the market. Don't forget. All I found was a guy who needed a phone charger or a vape charger. Every time I text you it means... You can do... The bar is low. The bar is so very low. A guy that needed a...

Good job, Mikey. I did wireless, man. That was classic. You look like a vapor. Do you have a charger? Classic Mikey. What a coup. We have Emily Jones. How about that? Who will roam the stands for the Rangers. She's roaming the stands of the Byron Nelson for us.

I mean, people are just gonna recognize her and walk up to her. That's right. Emily Jones. They're gonna be like, hey, mosquito bite. I remember you. Turn around. Didn't we go to school together?

It's good. Oh, it's Gorilla. Oh, I got you. That's funny. What was it? Gorilla. Oh, I got 20. What was it? Gorilla, Mosquito Bite, and whatever? Dishpan ass. Dishpan ass. Is that good?

Dishpan ass. So I solved two of the three. You worked on two of those? I solved two of them. Technology and stuff. Technology, yeah. It's interesting because, you know, they have stuff for all three. Find the oldest dude you would bang.

Oh, look, no, I'm going to check these girls. Where's the girl that was dancing? Yeah, there you go. Look at her go. It's interesting because you know they have stuff for all three. Find the oldest dude you would bang. Where's the girl that was dancing? Yeah there you go. Look at her go. This is how it's done.

Hey! What's going on? We're broadcasting live right now. We want to know about the dance moves you just put on. I used to be a sports broadcaster so I just yeah I was being silly. I love, I always. I'm a sports broadcaster and I don't, yeah, I was being silly. I love, I always appreciate camera men. I'm a sports broadcaster, and I don't dance like that.

Can you teach me your moves? Come on, girls. They came from the heart. Okay, okay, how old are you girls? Y'all are adorable. 25. Oh, of course you are. We're not as young as you probably think we are.

How old do they think you are? Okay, how old do you think I am? 44. Okay. I'm gonna say 35. Oh, they're trying to be nice. I don't even know what they're doing. Okay, they think do you think I am? Okay They're trying to be nice Okay, they think I'm 35 wrong. Yeah, that's a lie 47 The first girl who was just being straight-up honest was like 43 40. Yeah, okay

Yeah, I'll send you some information. Okay. How old would you be willing to go? You know this whole Bill Belichick story? Yeah, so how old? So my man is actually a year and a half younger than me, so I'm the cougar in this situation. Hypothetically, like 30, like if I'm 24, like 30. I feel like 10 years. Like, I'm saying hypothetically, like max. How annoying are these voices?

What if he's really rich and has won seven Super Bowls? I have my dad for that. I don't need a rich man. Whoa! Richness does not fix those wrinkles. Yeah. Yeah. Go for it.

See, they're concerned about wrinkles. I'm going to be totally honest with you. If you ask me right now what my goals for Nora are as a father, it would be that her answer is that. When it's would you fucking old dude say no no because I'm just trying to get from a dad Assassin that was great. Yeah, you're great, Emily. Just like the prosest pro I've ever seen. No bullshit.

Perfect. Let's see what else we've got here. Here's what we need you to do, Emily. Because I want to balance out the sexist Major League Baseball, I'd like you to find a hot guy and get his phone number for yourself. Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure.

Oh, yeah. For sure. For sure, for sure. Yeah, for sure, for sure. What could yeah. For sure. For sure. For sure. For sure. For sure. Get yourself some of that wiener. Evan's going to be in a goddamn pretzel.

Jesus. What's going on, guys? Look for a bulge. How y'all doing? What's going on? Good. We're broadcasting live. You think that's awesome?

That's awesome. You guys ever heard of the Dumb Zone? The Dumb Zone. The Dumb Zone. The Dumb Zone. The Dumb Zone. I think that's awesome. You guys ever heard of the dumb zone? The dumb zone? The dumb zone? The dumb zone? Jake Kemp and Dan McDowell. You heard of them?

I've heard of them. Okay, well, we're moving on then. I want people to say bad things about them. What's going on guys? You all know about the ticket? I mean about the dumb zone? That's our phone card guys. No, you can use the ticket.

Start with the ticket. Start with the ticket. Say we got fire. No, I don't work for Dairy Queen. Say we got fire. You guys are going to be like, oh, I'm going to be like, oh, I'm going to be like, oh, I'm going to be like, oh, I'm going to be like, oh, I'm going to be like, oh, I'm going to be like, oh, I'm going to be like, oh, I'm going to be like, oh, I'm going to be like, oh, I'm going to be like, oh, I'm going to be like, oh, I'm going to be like, oh, I'm going to be like, oh, I'm going to be like, oh, I'm going to be like, oh, I'm going to be like, oh, I'm going to be like, oh, I'm going to be like, oh, I'm going to be like, oh, I'm going to be like, oh, I'm going to be like, oh, That's our phone charge, guys. No, you can use the ticket. Start with the ticket. Start with the ticket. Say we got it. That's our phone charge, guys.

No, I don't work for Dairy Queen. Say we got fired. I think you can buy one. I got it for my friend Josh Abbott. It's Josh Abbott's hat. Oh, you dropped something. Thanks. How old are you guys?

You don't never ask a lady her age. You're not. So what's your age? I'm 44. He's not a lady. What's your age? 50. 50. So what's your age? I'm 44. He's not a lady. What's your age? 50.

Ask him if he'd fuck Bill Belichick. How young? Would you have sex with Bill Belichick? Yes. You would? No, absolutely not. Would you have sex with Bill Belichick? I don't swing that way. But if you did?

I mean, I do like a woman in a torn up hoodie. Okay, good to know, good to know. I'm trying to find a young man to ask him for his phone number. Yeah, I just wanted to talk to you guys. You look like fun. I appreciate you. I'm not young. Okay, we all have a good day. I'm older and dirt. Jesus dude.

Alright, pour yourself together. Who are you trying to... bye guys. That guy wasted. There they go. That guy was slurring. Trying to find a hot. Anybody, do you see any hots around here? Hot dudes? Yeah. Guys, cut day is over. I got the Saroi twins over here. Yeah. Oh, so it's moving day? Yeah, moving day? Cut day is over. That's what that music means. Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhin' moving day! It's motherfuckin' moving day! It's motherfuckin' moving day! It's motherfuckin' moving day!

It's motherfuckin' moving day! It's motherfuckin' moving day! It's motherfuckin' moving day! It's motherfuckin' moving day! It's motherfuckin' moving day! It's motherfuckin' moving day! It's motherfuckin' moving day! It's motherfuckin' moving day!

It's motherfuckin' moving day! It's motherfuckin' moving day! How old are you guys? 23. What about you? 22. You're a group of youngsters. Hello, ladies and gentlemen. How old do you think I am? Where is she? She's over there. Do you need a precise answer?

He's perfect. 37. Wow, that's amazing. I'm 47. She's going to seal this deal. How's that bold? Do you think I could get your phone number? Sure, why not? OK.

I don't really want it. I just think I could ask you. I'm married, and I'm old enough to be your mom. But thanks for entertaining. Has he ever tried 47? You look of absolute terror in your eyes when I ask you that. It's a surprise. Has he ever tried 47? Oldest of absolute terror in your eyes when I ask you that. It's hard. Has he ever tried 47?

Oldest lady he's been with. Oldest lady he's been with. How old is the oldest woman you've dated? I'm sorry? How old is the oldest woman you've dated? 21. When I was 22. OK, what about you?

21. 21. How old would you go? How old would I go? Would you date? Would you sleep with Pat Summit? Would you sleep with Pat Summit? That's the question man. Why not?

It is for sure why not. She's actually gay, but that's okay. What about Martha Stewart? What about Kim Mulkey? Because they missed tickers that day. We're Baylor students. That's okay. What about Martha Stewart? What if he was like, what about Kim Malky? Six-time national champion? What about Kim Malky? Cause they missed tickers that day. Oh I can't, we're Baylor students.

We're Baylor students. So that's a yes. Why don't we take a break? Exactly. We love you guys. Okay, oh okay. Well good, y'all are good, good Baptists. Good boys.

Isn't Baylor Baptist? It is, yeah. Y'all are good Baptist boys. We're not the greatest representatives. Tell them it's officially moving day. Okay, well I appreciate you guys' time. Thanks for entertaining the idea of me getting your phone number.

All right, y'all be good. All right, guys. Yeah! Digits, digits, digits! That is a killer right there. She got digits. Oh, she asked a... He was going to give them to me.

Oh, yeah. Hot blonde on the move. That looks like a belly check. He was actually a really cute kid. Who's this lady right here? Literally. Look at this stick of dynamite. He was actually a really cute kid. Who's this lady right here? Looked like literally cute. Look at this stick of dynamite. She's looking for an older man.

Yeah, she's looking for an older man. That chick would have beaten my ass. Really? Stick right here? Right here? That one, oh yeah, wait. Okay, right there. Yes, she would beat my ass.

Oh, I got your back though. You're protected. I don't know how well I'd hold up in a fight, honestly. You're protected today. You've got numbers. You want a break? Who else is going to go? That was awesome. You've got a break to prep for the start of moving though.

Okay. Yeah. Hey, it's Tiger. I need you to do me a huge favor. Can you please take your name off your phone? My wife went through my phone and may be calling you. If you can, please take your name off that. And let me call it, just have it as a number on the voicemail. Just have it as your telephone number. Okay, you gotta do this for me. Huge, quickly, all right, bye. ["Dumb Zone Theme Song"]

You're listening to the Dumb Zone. Ah, yes, thank you Tito's Handmade Vodka for having us out here at the CJ Cup. Byron Nelson. We are here with the Soroy twins, although they apparently are cashing in some of those Tito's Handmade Vaca chips that were brought over. Oh, I didn't get, I paid for mine. Oh my goodness. I did. I paid for my Bloody Mary.

What are you doing? You're Emily Jones. You're right. You shouldn't have to pay for a drink anywhere in DFW. You are so right. Especially when you're with us. I was watching this, is it a popular thing now, especially in like New York where they just have YouTubers or TikTokers

that just walk up to people and talk to them on the street. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, what do you do? What do you think, whatever. And there's one where this guy who's really into acting, so he says, is walking up to people like, hey, what do you do? Are you in the arts?

Like, what was your first? And he walks up to a guy and he's like, what do you do? He's like, I'm an actor. He's like, oh, me too. And he's talking to him about it. And it's just Willem Dafoe. And the guy doesn't recognize him and walks off.

That's how I felt when that 25 year old woman was like, well, I'm in North Prime kind of thing. So I'm a little silly. And Emily was like, I'm the fucking queen, bitch. Yeah, yeah. You tell me you're in sports broadcasting? I did. Look me in my eye and respect me. I did not. But no, actually she in sports broadcasting? I did. Look me in my eye and respect me.

I did not. But no, actually, she did exactly what Willem Dafoe did, which was cool. Me too. Yeah, it's a fun job. And then walk off. That's interesting. Those girls liked being interviewed.

Yeah. They liked being interviewed. Dan just paused and said, why are their voices so annoying? Uh-huh. Emily's on the other side of the cutoff. Totally on the other side. What do you mean? I'm right on it. I'm right on it.

Yeah, I think if you spent a lot of time with my wife and her friends, they'd get to the level of. That's annoying me? That's annoying you. Yeah. But they're right on the line. Yeah.

It's the above or below millennial line. What do we got here? Saroyan, some orange chicken. The CJ Cup Byron Nelson. I want to say golf tournaments are cool. Dude, I've. Don't you think it's just cool to walk around the golf tournament?

I, Saroy. There's hots left and right. Yeah, absolutely. I feel like it's gotten way more tame. I remember when I first got to Dallas. But still awesome. I got here in 2004. I know, but like chicks would be wearing heels.

I mean, if you talk to the Byron people about that time, they reference it and say, well, we got away with that for a long time. Yeah, we had John Drago on the monkey. And I asked about that. And he's making a concerted effort to not... I remember I went to a party one time at Tommy Armor III, is that right? Yes. That's a name, yeah. And he had the chick wrapped in Saran wrap

with servant sushi off her body. I love it. I would love to see that someday. So billions, billions, right? Yeah, it just feels like that's a TV thing that never actually happened. It actually happened, and Yeah, it just feels like that's a TV thing that never actually happened. It actually happened, and I saw it.

And I really like sushi, but I could not bring myself to do it. Oh, really? You couldn't do it? How does it work? You just chopstick it off her body? Yeah. Is the spice and the soy on the side like armed with? She's holding it in her mouth.

Well, I don't know. She's got some wasabi in her mouth. That would be ridiculous. A scoop of wasabi in her mouth. Well, I don't know. She's got some wasabi in her mouth. That would be ridiculous. A scoop of wasabi in her mouth. Certain pieces smelled double fishy. OK. Yeah, I mean, it just grossed me out. You know what else here?

I'm a guy who's about personal growth. That took him a lot longer than it should. It's true. And it was partially because he was being respectful, but also, I like that. I mean, it's funny, though. They don't do it with like you know like little mini sausages or whatever like on a guy yeah Vienna

sausage yeah we're all for equality I want you to get a phone number I don't want just to be no I want to it appropriate and we Jake wanted to look for the biggest age gap With a guy an old guy and a young lady. Yeah, which certainly occurs at golf tournaments But we also want to look for the other way around What's the lady with a boy toy? Yeah. Yeah the other way around. What's the lady with a boy toy? Yeah.

Everything goes here. A trophy husband. The Byron Nelson. Just something on your arm. What about a dude with a kid? Yeah. Hanging out. That kid looks cool, actually.

The Byron Nelson is back. Between Emily and I, we're bringing the boobs and the cocaine back to the Byron Nelson. Yeah. Let's get to the core of what it needs to be from Dallas. Which one do you have? Bulgie. Bulgie.

Could I get away with just wearing red pants, normally? the core of what it needs to be from Dallas. Which one do you have? Bulgy. Could I get away with just wearing red pants normally? Because I feel like the red pants guys really stand out because no one ever wears red pants. Like how cool do they feel this morning when they just slide them things on? Buckle up. It's like being in Buckingham Palace. Can't give it one last look. What if you dress like that out to the tournament?

It's a very diverse group, isn't it? The red pants crew. Someone is doing it who's not an official red panther. No, it's, yeah. That's wearing red pants. Did people used to wear red on Sunday, like to go watch Tiger? Yes.

Oh, yeah. You dressed like Tiger. OK. Yeah. And you know he thought everybody that did that was a giant douche. Yeah. Yeah, other people did that I would yeah

I'd be watching it in my and the TV with a red shirt and black shorts Did it at the first April Fool's and it was amazing the turtleneck no just the red shirt and black Answered being black and stuff and skin I've never understood the mock turtleneck on a dude What's the word? What? Yeah, I don't know what mock me what is mock it's a little bit down yeah yeah fitted oh yeah Snoog I've never understood I don't think there's been a day in my life I've been a rock alive that I could pull off any kind of turtleneck I would you could absolutely pull it off. No, he couldn't. Why? The neck is very long.

Not with your facial hair. She knows. What if you start getting like the bad old man neck, Trump neck or something, turkey neck. The Roseanne neck. No, that's no good. You could still do it. Yeah, your neck is gross.

You should wear more turtle neck. Neck is gross. I actually think turtle neck is kind of, I don't think I even own one. I thought you did. No, I've seen you in a Turtleneck. But that is a costume. But yes, I do own one. But I actually don't think the Turtleneck's a bad look.

I think it's kind of cool and practical, it's generally when it's cold out and you... Yeah, it is. More coverage. And there's people that wear scarves. I just was about to talk about scarves. Scarf away. coverage and there's people that wear scarves I just was about to talk about scarves well scarf away I don't really that's well I just was gonna bring up scarves that was the weirdest tease ever

I was just about to talk about it let's take a second break and we'll come back scarves am I right? I'll make it open scarves am I right? hey let's promote that uh we're gonna be on big Fox tomorrow I'm gonna put a scarf top. Scarf talk. Am I right? Hey, let's promote that we're gonna be on Big Fox tomorrow night. Is the Mom Games on there too, right?

Yep. Wow. I think it's like 4 a.m. or something. Yeah, Fox 4. We get the 1130 p.m. I think we get the 12 a.m. or 1230 a.m. You're right after us? Okay, so yeah, watch Fox 4.

Good lead-in. Already we're on It's like Daily Show and Colbert are these two. We're on channel 27 with DZ TV every night Monday through Friday, but then yeah, they're going to throw on what is the episode that's gonna be on Sunday night Blake? Sunday night at 1130 on Fox 4 You will see us with Eric Nadel. Eric Nadel. Nice. How did we ever land Eric Nadel?

Hall of Famer. Ford Frick. He's absolutely a Hall of Famer. Is there a chance that Emily at some point will enter the Rangers Hall of Fame? Stop. Dude, yes. Without a ticket.

No. You never know, I mean. Well, how many ladies are in the Rangers Hall of Fame? Zero. Oh. You could be the Jackie Robinson of it. Maybe. Yup, me and Jackie right on the same page.

You could break the vulva barrier. Hey, am I up, boy? Dude, you're gonna be in, for real. Okay. Stop, stop. No, I'm not kissing your- I'm gonna nominate her. I'm not kissing your pancake ass. That'll probably hurt if I nominate her. It's Blake. Dude, you're gonna be in, for real. Okay. Stop, stop. No, I'm not kissing your- I'm gonna nominate her. I'm not kissing your pancake ass.

That'll probably hurt if I nominate her. It's a dish pan, thank you. I have no idea what this is gonna sound like. Let's see if we have a song for Emily's new segment. What is it? Oh, is it scarves? Is it not planned? Scarf, scarf, scarf, scarf, scarf, scarf, scarf.

I can't hear anything. I can't either. But I bet it was great. Oh well, keep going. I bet it was a good escape. You got to take a shot. This is it won't play? Oh well.

I killed the show. That did kill the show. Killed the show. Do you want to do a? We're waiting on the news anyways. Want to do some news? Yeah. Yeah.

Here's Jay with the gun, so. Want to try this? No. I've got a couple of my audio works. Yeah No, I got a couple my audio work Blank cares about my idea more than you know, I'm just kidding my input and everything. It's BB go spicy I don't even know what those things are, but that was awesome. He made me rice puffs. That was awesome. This is delicious Right. Oh, Emily. You'll be happy to know that Tarrant County is on the board when it comes to this measies outbreak. Oh no. Yeah.

Is it, where are we at on this with vaccines? If you were vaccinated, are you getting the meas? No. Where do you live? Fort Worth. Okay. What turns into the shingles? Right by TCU.

Chickenpox. Chickenpox? Okay. So, almost 700 people statewide yesterday. So if you had chickenpox you can get shingles? Right. Yes. No, I thought it was if you didn't have chickenpox. No, I think if you had chickenpox that means that eventually you're basically going to get shingles. Damn. Really? Yeah. I don't know if that's accurate. Did you have chickenpox, Jake? I think I did. had chicken pox I don't know. I definitely did what did we have to bathe in when you have the chicken pox buttermilk milk? Yeah, right buttermilk oatmeal buttermilk in Tabasco. Yeah, really buttermilk

I don't know if you're kidding because I did though I did oatmeal and I remember it being delightful Why do kids not get chicken pox anymore? Are they vaccinated? Yeah, there's a vax for it now Yeah, amazing that it Although you can you know, you can't control the Internet Vegas and count cards. Yeah. Yeah So Tarrant County on the board and it's funny because they did the same thing they did with the guy who was in Dallas, but they tell you where they were. Where were they? Right here.

Walmart. It just says, right now it's, why would you assume that? A lot of people go to Walmart. No kidding, it's a very popular destination. It's like one of the most popular destinations. I can't stand Walmart. For shopping. You are working that drink hard.

What are you doing? I'm trying to get the olive out of the bottom. Okay. She's been prospecting that not working. Casual fish. All nasty fingers. My fingers are fine. All right. We have an interesting story. Fun murder. This is the type of might end up on date line. Triple, fun murder. Triple murder in Parker County. Okay, that's right in my neck of the woods. I was going to say, I don't think the sororities or Dan would totally get this, but I had grandparents who used to live out on the Hood-Parker County line. Yep. Way out there.

Wyze, somewhere in there. When you're out there, you'll drive by houses that look abandoned. And you're like, what are we doing here? It's just like a 2-1 with like five cars out front that are broken down. Someone lives there. And you're always just thinking, are they cut off from society? Because Fox Four has a story about this triple murder where they have a picture of the house and you know, there's always a tarp Yep, like that's the front door kind of it. It's that

squatters there was a husband and wife living there and they were living there with their friend and they were all three found dead in a nearby Creek back at the creek April 20th a crew in out there they were found dead the two of them and a friend who was living with them now you think that's a thing too with those houses there'd be a friend living there I was gonna say yes that is an ultimate red flag splitting rent yes if you and your husband or wife have a roommate yeah you, say for maybe I just got divorced and need a month or two. Yeah.

Okay, listen to this for the married folks. If your husband had like one of his home, he's got divorced and he's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. It's just going to be a couple of days. No, no, it's not. Couple of weeks. I know, but it starts with a couple of days. It's just going to be a couple of days.

Just got to get back on my feet. Listen, he's in a bad way right now. Save a little cash. He needs some friendly faces. A little olive branch is all I need. It'll be good for the kids. My girlfriends and I talk about this all the time, like workshopping the idea of the moms and the kids live

together, and then the dads have their own place. And then we just utilize them when they're necessary. Yeah, I don't, I feel like you're describing a utopia. I mean our idea, I mean it's everyone's idea is that like if the wide goes, the wide's go, you just get back together with the fellas and get like a four bedroom house. Yes. When you're 70. Compound. 65. Yeah. Something like that.

Just kick it. For sure. I think it would, quality of life wise, it's about the best thing you can do. Well, I mean, like I think about all the time, like love my husband, but I don't need to sleep with him every night. Like he makes noises and shit. You know, the two bedroom thing is really popular. Um.

More popular among the older couples as well. Which you are not. My, obviously. No, but once you. Yeah. I among the older. Yeah couples which you are not obviously no, but once you yeah I can grow a little older you've been sleeping with my grandparents. Yeah, I never saw my grandparents even the same bed They were always in separate bedrooms. Oh great. Yeah. Yeah, that's the same here I'd never ever I mean, that's why like I would sleep in bed with one of them It'd be felt weird if I was in there with both of them. Jack and Jill bathroom? Yeah. Or separate?

Separate. Separate. Separate totally. Oh, totally separate. Yeah. What about different states? You actually tried that for a while now. You got the J. Moore.

You guys know about the J. Moore? No, what's that? With Jeannie Buss, they're married, and they have an apartment building, I guess a small apartment building, where the third floor is Jeannie's floor, the second floor is someone else, and the first floor is J Moore. Yeah, J Ford. Don't laugh at that. She'll hop in the elevator.

We'll watch TV together at night or something. Then he'll go back home. It sounds amazing. And maybe I'm a weirdo. Emily got the olive out of the bucket. Oh my gosh. Now eat it so slowly. The feeling of being able to sneak into your wife's room

for sex. I saw that. That's appealing to me. The sneak into your wife's room for sex. I saw that. Like that's appealing to me. Wait, the feeling of your wife what? Like you kind of sneak in to her board. Yeah. Hey, it's me. Yeah.

Then you can play. She's like, why do you want? She's like, why'd you bring him? Wow. So you can play intruder? Just go. Yeah. So anyways, it'd be great to have a separate bedroom

from your wife. It would be even better to not be murdered with her and your roommate, which, ideally, where the story started. Right. If your wife's going to be murdered, you want to be doing it. Or elsewhere. Yeah.

Yeah. So they have three suspects here. Two of them charged with capital murder. One of them charged with messing murder, one of them charged with messing with the corpse. Is that the formal charge? I can read you the formal charge, it was hilarious. Messing with the corpse?

Tampering with physical evidence with intent to impair a human corpse. Impair? Oh, the corpse. I thought you said the courts, like the court system. Yeah, I thought you said the courts. I thought the court system. Yeah, I thought you said that. Abuse of a corpse without legal authority and failure to report a felony with death results. Hold on, abuse of a corpse without legal authority. So you could have legal authority to abuse

a corpse. Yeah, I mean, like a lab, I guess. I guess so, yeah. I was thinking of throwing stuff against it. I thought you meant that they were doing something bad with the corpse. Well, they were moving it. Yeah, he was moving it.

Doing it closest to the corpse contest. They have three suspects. Bringing it back to golf. And they all three have different stories. They're all like 18, 27, 19, just three good county hood rats. I'm just saying I want to watch the drama about this story. They're that young?

Yeah. Oh wow. The people who died were in their 50s. Oh. The suspects are young and this is their house. What's the most plausible explanation for this? Like, you know what I'm talking about. Oh my God, yeah.

That's. You're right by that. Oh God. That's a shanty. That's the whole place? for this? You know what I'm talking about. Oh my god, yeah. That's right by that. Oh god. That's a whole place? You have Shanty. A Shanty? But Emily knows what I'm talking about. Oh, 100%. These are everywhere out there.

Yeah. West Texas, too. A fixer-upper. Like when you're driving them. Good Bones. Good Bones. Is that a show? Fixer-upper?

No, Good Bones, I think it's an actual show. Oh, I forgot. That was another one of my nicknames. And Good Times. Bones a show? Good bones bones bones. I think that was another one of my good times Bones Jones. Oh, yeah, that's good. Why is that? Because you love the bone? Yeah. Yep So much in sixth grade Dan big big boner and six now you you threw in the sixth grade here at the end So that is late info. That is not fair fair of you that's a flag on Emily Jones yeah well in six red why did they call your bone just as a rhyme I was skinny oh I had no idea hairy legs all hot chicks complain about oh man I was just too hard you know not hard it was to be tall and skinny. I'm so tall. Emily's all hot. You have a model body.

You have a model body. I was so not hot. Oh, I couldn't gain weight. You guys are giving in, so. Everything I ate, I just tried to eat and eat. I couldn't gain weight. That's not true. I was so skinny.

I was not so skinny. I was thin, but I also was not cute. I mean, I had a bad perm. No one was cute. Hairy legs, dish pan ass, no boobs. Okay. I got, especially during basketball. At least it hasn't scarred you for life.

Yeah. I got, TC knows this, but I got... You got right about it. During basketball, obviously, especially with the sleeveless, at the free throw line, I got a lot of pipe cleaners and Kermit Kermit Kermit Kermit the frog yeah cuz you have green upper arms yeah that made me feel good about myself but look at you now you're jacked yeah you're ripped yeah that's why he brings it up so that yeah look at me now follow up we have Nice segue. We have a situation. Well, what are these things I bought? We have a situation in Jacksonboro, Texas.

Also out that way, sort of. Jack County. Jack County. The Jack County Sheriff's Office has taken over law enforcement for the Jacksonboro Police Department because the Jacksonboro Police Department has all quit. All of them. They have all of their own volition decided to resign.

So the county is taking over. Now on its face you're like that's not I don't know what's going on. Jacksboro is not very big. Funding. Yeah you're just thinking it's a little thing. So it turns out the story here is they have a city manager and he is at war with the police department. He's I guess investigated him a couple times and this came to a head last December when the city manager was pulled over for an officer by an officer

for a broken taillight. He suspects they were trying to set him up for a DUI How do you set someone up for a DUI? I was thinking they plant something he told the boy that he suspects that he was being set up They found no, you know his breath whatever After that happened. He started an investigation into why he was pulled over and they all quit into why he was pulled over and they all quit. So by they all, we might be talking about like 10 guys, but it is a funny thing to imagine if you're in your home, he's just 10 guys in a police department. Everybody quit.

We don't wanna do it. We don't like the guy who's the boss. Find someone else. We're out. Did you just leave? This was 10 people? But there's more. I don't know. There's more to the story is what we're saying. Definitely there's like a battle right? Yeah, the person in charge of the police wants to investigate them

and they say I'm surprised maybe it does happen so they can't get investigated and fired now because Right they quit. I bet it does happen in small towns like a little political rival or somebody who Donated to a different church and you're like, oh funny you leaving the bar? Like because anybody could be picked off for a DUI on a Tiki Taki if they really wanted to. Yeah. Like just sit outside of a sports bar. Yeah. And if you had two beers in two hours, they might be able to get you. Sit outside of Ikea. So I just... to get you sit outside of Ikea so I just yesterday was a special day for you did you get drunk at Ikea well kind of drunk I didn't drive what's drunk me I wasn't

driving they serve booze at Ikea no good but yeah I bet that I just wondered why doesn't that happen to like the small town mayor that somebody doesn't like. Can you imagine how many drunk people are rolling out of here today? Oh my god. Oh my god. Because everyone here is going to take elite rides. Elite rides.

DFW. Okay. Promo code DZ15 for 15% off your first order. Everybody's real responsible here at the CJ Cup. Yeah. I got a DUI when I was 20. You did. You did. I did.

Those antique ones. The antique ones. You didn't have the fake boobs yet, huh? I did not. Yeah. So the slow unzip. That'll get you out of there. The cannonball run slow unzip.

I think it's going to work. Yeah. Unzip with your license tucked into the bra. I didn't really buckle his knees. I can't believe I haven't told you all this story. So right after the OJ trial. I can't believe I haven't told y'all this story. So, it was right after like the OJ trial. I'm in on this. And so I had gone out, I was doing an internship in California, living with my mom, summer before I graduated from college.

And I go to hang out with my guy friends from college, they were in Manhattan Beach. So we all go out, I'm trying to be oh I'll be I got this I'll drive I need it y'all you know we're seated to do Sake bombs and all that stuff and then so we're in Manhattan Beach get pulled over yeah and I'm driving one of the dudes dad's car I there you know they gave me a field sobriety test which I failed what did they pull you over for? Yes I mean it was not. I was I've had way too much to drink. Okay good. And so he puts me. Good that they pulled her over. Yes for sure. Protect the insult. So he puts me in the in the patrol car to take me to jail and I told him that I knew Robert

Kardashian. Amazing. Did this work? Yeah it worked. They let her through the keys back to her. Did you have even like a seven degrees of separation? Why didn't you even pick a better member of the dream team? I don't know.

I don't know. Because that's more believable. Yeah. You know? I guess that is true. I don't know. If you told me that your dad was friends with Jeff Fry, I'd buy it. If you said he was friends with Wando, I'd have been like, no way.

Jeff Fry. Don't make me start it on that guy. Oh. Hey. We've had him on. Another tease. We actually have today. We've had the next segment.

He got really, he got really mad at us one time. Over like baseball celebrations. Yep. Yep. Oh yeah. There we go. We're in the same boat. Yeah. So anyway, I went to jail and spent the night in jail. Did he laugh at the card?

Is he like, Oh, let's get him on the board. He like pity me at that point. He's like, all right, so you got something to call. Oh, mosquito bite. That's funny. Come on. Get your dishpan ass in the cell. Get your dishpan ass.

Yeah, so I just spent the night in jail. But it was in Manhattan Beach, which is like the Highland Park jail. But also, it is. It's like Highland Park. But then when I had to go to court, it's in Compton County. That's different.

Hell yes. So I went to court in Compton County and had to do the whole thing. Damn. That's pretty hard sounding, a good sentence. And then the biggest mistake I made was I told my kids that this happened. Ooh.

Not on purpose. They were asking me, they were asking about like, what do people eat in jail or whatever? And I, when I was in the hole, okay. You're like sushi. Yeah. Maybe go. When I was in Manhattan beach, they served us omelets. Yellowtail is fine.

So do you guys remember by the way, we're kind of done with the news. Just California roll. If you need to play the end of it or something. Is that the news? Yeah, sure. So when we got here today there was a dude who was listening to me talking to us and He's like, oh I emailed you recently when you guys were talking about prison Because we were talking about conjugal visits. Oh, yeah a guy emailed me and he's like hey I did a couple years like in a medium security prison in New Mexico And he told us all about it. That guy was here today

What cool he it was when he was 24 He's what I don't know mid to late 30s now and he was just like yeah Here's here's how it works and he started telling me about it and I was like listen I'm not trying to sound Did going to like a low-level rehab somewhat prepare me for the experience and I was like, listen, I'm not trying to sound, did going to like a low level rehab somewhat prepare me for the experience? And he's like, it's the same. He's like, you have a job, you work four hours

at your job in the morning and in the afternoon, after lunch, you do your rec shit, whatever you want to do, go play basketball. He's like, I was telling Blake, we had a slow pitch softball league most of the time. I was there until somebody beat someone to death with a bat. Oh. Ooh.

And I was like, how many times did you get? That's going to ruin the whole thing for everybody. But then I was like. Right. Just like rehab. Yeah. And I was like, how many times you could beat up? And he's like, never.

And I said, well, then I assume no. You know, because you can't be raped if you're into it. Right. So if he was having sex, he was... It was conjugal. Consensual. Conjugal. What does conjugal mean?

How often do they get to do it? You know what? I should have asked that. So here's how it works, Emily. He said that if you have been there a year and you have good behavior, that once, actually he did say, he said once or twice a year, you can get 48 to 72 hours in what's basically like a little trailer right

outside the prison. At one time? One altogether? Yeah, you're gone for the weekend. And are they monitoring it? Yes, but your whole family can come in. They can bring as much food as they want. And it's like a little three bedrooms or three rooms suite

that your family can stay in. And you just hang out. That sounds way nicer than I had in my head. No kidding. So much nicer. And he was like, yeah, in the afternoon, it was either some guys lifted weights, played basketball, played softball,

and then he's like, that's pretty much it. What was he doing time for? I don't think he'll care if I say, because we never gave his full name, but it was, he gave alcohol to minors, and I believe they were involved in a not fatal okay but an accident in Manhattan Beach oh I don't yeah but I think I'm coming around on jail a little okay just a smack like you're not as

afraid of it you're saying I'm'm not. Well you better watch the bank account then Blake because I'm Jake has always talked about embezzling would be a cool crime to commit. That is a good one to get if you're gonna have to pick one that's a good one to be in. I know but I think I think. Nice white collar. I think you have to pay it back. You have to pay it back. No, you're profound bankruptcy. If I had the money to do it I would do it. A little crime.. The little crime. Do a little crime. A little bit of crime.

I'm so not cut out for jail. You see, that's the thing. Well, I'm not so much worried about jail, but I think if you're gonna do a crime, you have to expect to have some level of success. And I don't think I could embezzle successfully. No. You need a guy. How about a dealer?

What could you? Like Blackjack? Yeah. You know. I'd be a terrible dealer. I'd be a terrible dealer. Because you get high on your own supply? Like a drug dealer you mean?

No, I'm not a big drug person. I don't do a lot of drugs. I was the worst drug dealer and I would keep really good notes. And I just keep noticing, I'm we're starting in a loss we're down yeah anything else it wasn't because everything's red it wasn't because I was smoking a lot of weed it was because I would somebody would want to buy weed for me and then they would start telling me all their problem you're just like a nice guy fuck I don't know man what do you need yeah and I was only

doing it so much can you pay yeah you pay? Yeah. And then it was... Were you at your like location where you lived? Because someone comes in there then you can't you have to keep them for like 10, 20 minutes. They can't just come and go come and go. Yeah yeah. Because that's red flags so then you have like forced conversation and friendship. We had a whole thing. You sound like you speak from experience, Mike. Well that is true is true. I buy a lot of drugs. I love drugs. You love drugs? What's your drug of choice?

All. All of them? Love. Aw. Have you ever attempted, have you ever tried heroin? No. That's scary, right? No, no, not like, I think I've had like ecstasy pills

that had heroin in them. you never know never like shooting nothing I don't have heroin in it. It had like opiate Maybe yes, dude our old man scared the shit out of us with needles Like as we were going to the doctor's office He would say my mom is coming taking us to the doctor and he'd be like he's gonna stick a needle in you this big It's gonna go in your arm one side and come out the other and we're just like all right And mom is like doing so needles were never an option just messing with you. Yes, okay Yeah seems odd to do to it, right? It's funny it but we also wanted we never wanted heroin. No, so

heroin free Heroin free I ate some mushrooms one time and I and then pot that's it. You didn't like the mushroom thing? It didn't really I don't I don't know if I didn't I don't know I it didn't I didn't feel like it did much made me a little paranoid I mean that was like I was like early 20. I never really got into pot. I don't know. Sounds like you were kind of wild. No.

DUI, doing shrooms. Dude, everybody. I think that's just normal. Doing shrooms. Oh, okay. I gotta. But also too, everybody at that time could have gotten popped for a DUI, they just didn't.

Yeah, and if you got one back then, those are like, they're weighted differently. That's like a tenth of a DUI. So I- People used to be like, you know, seriously. Yeah, who would not drink and drive back then? Everybody did. Everybody did. You had to.

But my blood alcohol level? Uh oh, what was it, you remember? It's like 0.233. Yes! I had a source text. Which I'm thankful for. Like I'm thankful that, I'm thankful it had like that open mind.

I mean that was, that's scary as shit. Like driving and being that, that's, that's. Can verify EJ has had friends in Manhattan Beach that fucking party. Oh, who said that? Oh, is that Fitz? I don't know. I bet it's it's this dude finally. Oh my gosh. Oh. Sorry. Moving day. It's moving.

Moving, moving, moving day. Moving day. Moving day. Ah. Oh my gosh. Shut up. That was a lot. We are like three hours from golf coming through this hole though.

You know? Seventeen when they just reshuffle everything after the cut. So Jake, if you played this, this is the par three, right? Yeah. The famous island green. Get out there, Jake. This par three, 17. Yeah. I was did you go down to the edge? I did. So you could see the

saw all the undulations like the box seats or whatever that look over the. If you were driving, what are the chances you would hit one into here? Don't you think they're really good? Are you right-handed? Are you right-handed? Yeah. No, then that other side would be... He sliced more often.

Yeah. But I'm saying we were watching like whatever the last major was, the playoff hole. What was this? Masters, right? Yeah. Yeah. And just the little tongue. Oh, that's terrifying. There's a million fans.

You're killing somebody. Right there. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Jake is killing somebody. Yet what confidence they have that Rory, there's absolutely no chance Rory will hit this into my face. And I will stand 20 feet away from him while he's hitting this golf ball. We've done that before at the Byron. Why'd you just say that like that? Because Byron called back.

No, Dan. We were at the Tony Romo thing in Lake Tahoe, you know, like the celebrity thing? Oh, yeah. Yeah, with our guy from Winslow's. Yeah, exactly. It's set up like this, except they all suck at golf. Right. So it is that exact question. So we're walking up

on like the 18th hole, we're walking down the fairway and we see this like disturbance. We get up there, there's a lady holding her bloody head. Oh, hell yeah. And we're like, what the... I mean with a lump. Huge. And then US Olympic hero TJ Oshie walks up and he's like, oh, I'm so sorry. The hockey player? Yeah. He's like, I'm so sorry. Oh no. But it's like this where you let the people close into landing zones, but those dudes all suck it all.

Who would you be ha- okay, so TJ Oshie, you're like- Way below the other. How about Larry the Cable Guy? Okay, hold on. Mario Lopez. The funniest thing is, it's fine. TJ Oshie kind of like stands over her, you know, and he's like, wow, and he even like touches the family.

He's like, I'm so sorry. What's he supposed to do? And then he kind of goes, what kind of lie I got over there? And he just walks over while there's like paramedics and goes and rips pulls out a five iron and just kind of off we go. Let me finish this whole thing. And then as soon as they get that girl on a medical golf cart and is about to drive away the next T guy just sit right in the same area pumps one straight in the same death

zone. We're in a bad spot. So yes, Jake probably would skip one up into the corporate suites on the right of 17. You're at the CJ Cup and thanks to Tito's. Tito's delicious. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. Tito's. ever have Crystal Palace? That's what I drank in college. Crystal Palace? Yeah, yeah, I remember that. Like in a plastic, but it's terrible. Pepsi product maybe, not remember that. It's awful.

That was a vodka? No. Crystal Palace. Yeah, Crystal Palace was a vodka. I was thinking of those, just like the light sugary drink. You know about Zima? Zima. Oh, a non-alcoholic drink. Zima, Mad Dog 2020.

Crystal. Purple Passion. Crystal. Purple Passion. Crystal. Crystal Pepsi? Strawberry Hill. Boy, you drank some shit, dude. Boone's Farm. Yeah.

Plainview. Yeah, I just had like, there was a beer called Fall Staff Light when I was in Gainesville. It was 99 cents a six pack. I've seen that. 99 cents a six pack. My first alcoholic beverage ever was my dad's Yellow Bellies. Oh, hell yeah.

The banquet bonus. I still drink one. That's where the launching point was. I'll still drink one. It'll literally be like I'll pour one, not pour one out, I'll drink one and think about it. We always have Yellow Bellies in the refrigerator because it reminds me of my dad. Still now?

Yeah. That's awesome. My husband always keeps them. That's great. Does anybody drink them or are they there for show? No, people drink them. Oh, awesome. My husband always keeps them. That's great. Does anybody drink them, or are they there for show? No, people drink them. Oh, OK. But we always have them. That's good.

Reminds me of my pops. That's awesome. Crystal light. Crystal light. Crystal light was a thing. That's the powder. Yeah, that's the powder. That's like Sunny D.

And I remember it was that and like boxed wine. That and what? The boxed wine. Boxed wine was like the bar. Oh, you mixed it? Yeah. OK. Franzia. Yeah. Franzia? That's so terrible box. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Franzia. Franzia. So terrible.

Franzia. You know, to maintain. So this is the whole Bronco League tournament. Thank you. Thank you for that Tito's Mike. You want to do some today in history. Let's do it. Okay. I'm about to have to go.

Okay. You got to go. Because I have to pee and I have to get back to Fort Worth. Oh, that Tito. I'll tell you what. I've got a sponsor event tonight. I basically just become a figurehead for the Rangers. I love it.

And that's why you're gonna be in the Rink of Honor, Hall of Fame or whatever. Okay. What are you doing tonight? You thought about it. Don't act like you've never thought about that. What would your, what would your, what would your Pope name be

when you get in the Rangers Hall of Fame? My what? The Pope name, you know? You're not gonna go in under Emily Jones. You've got to be... I don't know. I'd have to think about that. Can Cash induct you into the Rangers Hall of Fame?

Probably not. Frying pan the sixth. Well, if you're confident that you won't get in the Hall of Fame, then confidently just say yeah. You can induct me. Sure. Oh, congratulations! Thank you.

God, I knew this day would come. Can we ask you a question? Wait, if you get divorced, can we hook up? No. What? No. So that means you might get divorced. Yeah, I swear, I definitely don't want to be obligated to that.

Okay, if she wants to cover for that, more than this. This is terrible. Dan's six feet. What? Well over six feet. He's six feet. Yeah, I know too much. You don't want to live that close to where the sausage is made? No, no, no. I've been in the Dragon's Den, okay?

Yeah. That's all I need to know. You could live there. Yeah, it could all be yours. She somehow got out. I don't know how she got out. Tunneled out. It was giving serial killer vibes. Come on. See now that's what I think the conjugal visit places look like. Not killer, just kidnapper. It's not a killer. I'm no killer. Okay before I go did you have a question Jake? No. I thought you said can I ask you a question. It's okay. The moment moved. Aww. I ruined it? No it's good. Just like always. It's flowing. Okay. I was going to try to play you an open for your new segment, but we can't get it to load. Scarf Talk? Go for it.

He says go for it. It doesn't work. Finally. Talk about Scarves with Emily Jones. And I play like he said I'm so funny. Emily Jones. I have no idea. That's terrible.

What is this? What are you doing? I just heard Scarf Talk with Emily Jones. Yeah. Let's see. I was just going to talk about Scarf. She was Emily Jones. I was just going to talk about, with Emily Jones, hand-to-hand.

OK, sorry. What? I think it was magical. Yeah, yeah, I'm going to work on it. Hey, you got to crack eggs to make that omelet. I'm going to work on it. OK, I love you boys. Thanks for having me. Hey, Liam. Emily Jones. Thank you. Thank you to make that omelet. I'm gonna work on it. Okay, I love you boys. Thanks for having me.

Emily Jones. Thank you, thank you, thank you everyone. Magnifique. There she goes. Look at her go. You know, despite what they say, I think they can be good at jobs. And maybe even make 100 cents on the dollar.

Nah. They could, should they though. Bye bye. And maybe even make hundred cents on the dollar Nah They could should they though bye bye bye. Yes Like inequality is back, right? From working on I got a couple of viewer male birthdays for this oddly timed. It's a Saturday show folks We're doing a Saturday show they said and we're on moving day now yeah right yeah dear Poon person please wish happy he's a man he's 40 birthday to Chris beard not that one whoa he's celebrating in Vegas so let's hope he's still alive to hear this Fox News Sarah Hepple is his leader. I hope

Hope she doesn't break his glasses Blake More shin-suit you anecdotes never punt from Nick. He receives too much blame Why cuz you think anybody who break gets their glasses broken is just it feels like whatever happens is asking for it It's some point. It is a very personal move, breaking your eyeglasses. Dear Sultan of the Starfish, Saturday is my Bobby Witt Jr.'s square to birthday. You're all my leaders except for Shador Sanders talk. It's one day.

If you ever do a road show in Colorado, I will be there. Respecting the hell out of Jake's courage go big red from Jamie Does that mean he loves chador and he doesn't like the way we were I think he probably just doesn't want to hear about it Because he hears enough of that living in Colorado So today in history on Saturday May 3rd So today in history on Saturday, May 3rd This this party's kind of getting lit right yeah, we're leaving at the right time Or we're just getting into the party at the right time

Look at our caddy That guy's been to a rave before. You can tell. 100%. Bringing him in. Have we ever had a promo guy so invested? No. He seems like he is really into... Any promo person. Full give.

Full send. So let's see. You don't care about the first heart transplant, right? No. Barney's Santa. Jarvis. No, this was the first heart transplant ever was Everett Thomas in 1968. Baboon?

Oh. He lasted nine hours. 204 days. Oh. Oh, shit. Would you take that? All of the... Probably there's a lot of lead up to it and prepping and... What year?

1968. You don't do it. No. I do it now. Picasso saw this? Would you do it? Picasso saw the first ever heart transplant. Who's the guy, the radio guy that got a new heart?

Hal J. He's cooking right? He's still in the air. I'm pretty sure Somerall's liver only lasted like a couple of years. Yeah. That's gotta be tough. Well, cause he started drinking again, right? No. Would you get a full heart transplant if you knew you were going to get 200 days? What I'm saying is, is it like 200 days of lead up where you're prepping and getting ready and like your whole life is turned upside down, changing for it? It starts.

But you are going to die. But you get 200 more days. You get 200 extra days of, and then they're like, do you think they're telling you go ahead and start drinking and smoking with that new heart? Yeah, go run a marathon. You're not playing full court. No, you're just sitting around like hoping not to die. Yeah.

These moves. Yeah. You can't even play pickleball. No. We'll pass. Yeah, the pickleball thing. Now it's real. Dallas Flash, you guys.

Is that the name of a. Dallas Flash, you guys. Is that the name of a team? Yeah, our team. The champions of the EPL. Doesn't Cash have pickleball written all over him? I am spectacular. The only thing that could keep him from having pickleball written all over him is the possibility

that he looks down on it because it's a bastardization of tennis, which is the true white man's game No, nothing wrong with pickleball We didn't think you were gonna say there was something On this day in 1984 Michael Dell founded Dell Computer Corporation while a student at the University of Texas Got a sweet house in Cabo Good these IG pictures being taken live. Yeah.

It's getting hot in here. This is the best day. Is Dell still cooking? Yeah, Dell's still cooking. No, I mean like the company. Yeah. They do like business computers. I had a massive Dell.

Oh God. Hey, Dell. You ever seen that QVC commercial where they're selling Dell's? The guy calls in and he's like, some guy in Wisconsin, it's for James in Wisconsin, what do you love about your Dell? He's like, it does a lot, but the main thing I love is I watch a lot of porn a lot. And they're trying to go away from him. And he's like, yeah, I mean, I don't, it was like, what if Excel and all the other fantastic Microsoft, Dell, he's like, I don't know about all that. I mostly just use it to watch porno all the time.

All the time. I bet I could find that. All the time. I don't know about all that. That's awesome. Yep. On this day in 2015, Jake, two gunmen were shot and killed by a police officer in Garland IV.

Fun. They were attempting to storm just a little art contest. Says here, a purposely provocative contest for cartoon depictions of the prophet Muhammad. Ah. Don't do it. Do it right now. Jake has been doodling a little Muhammad thing in front of him this whole show actually.

Instead of the Van Halen thing. And I am getting, my blood is boiling. I figured out how to make a Muhammad in nine lines like a Stoosie ass. Yeah. So I can just, anytime I get a book. Just real quick. Yeah. Quick Muhammad.

Quick Muhammad. That's right You know this day in 2021 Bill and Melinda Gates divorced after 27 years of marriage She got rich Dude a hundred percent. What happened is he got that Epstein stuff got too hot. Has she gotten younger? She has a boy toy. That's a good question I don't even know what she looks like. But like it I think she definitely has actually. It started it reportedly was because the Epstein connection was getting like too. Is that right? People kept asking him about it over and over and then the girlfriend thing came out. He had like a 30 year old girlfriend. Yeah, his wife would let him just go

Once a year for a weekend to like the coast in North Carolina. Yeah, he's like, there's nothing sexual. We just hang out And if you had a billionaire friend, they're like great would that be I'll send a private jet We have an island it's gonna we're gonna party me girls there. We'd all obviously say say no you're now on Epstein we'd all say no I'm on to the girl the college girlfriend How about if you did get to go meet your college girlfriend once a year and your wife was cool with it? I think that'd be great. I would let her do it Yeah, all right, so you let her do it deal I

Don't think that but I wouldn't want her to do it on the same weekend because I want her to be gone one weekend when I'm there. Right. Yeah. I don't want the house to be empty. And then every year you got to just try and do more and more. Igor Oshansky is 43, some birthdays today. Ryan Dempster is 48.

Oh. Collectible Networks. Melinda Gates' boyfriend is Philip Vaughn. He is a tech entrepreneur and the founder of Tavor, a craft beer delivery service. He also has a background working at Microsoft. Dun dun dun. Inside job. So he talked her into his idea and all of a sudden he's an entrepreneur.

Yeah. Like would you fund this? Yeah. Give me a little beer idea. You fill this, I'll fund that. Ho. You guys ever heard of 35 year old? Ho.

Brooks Kevka? Oh. Yes. Team Brooks. Whatever happened. The real father of your child? I wish. Weird.

Is it his birthday? He's 35. Tyronn Lue is 48. Tyronn Lue, good coach. I missed the beginning. Tyronn Lue was the coach at what I consider to be maybe the greatest performance sports wise I've ever seen in my life, was Kawhi. I was there with Blake. Insane. Insane. Which game was this? It was game six when the Mavericks got up at a close

out game like 30 to 12 in the first quarter at home to close out the Clippers and Kawhi scored like 45 or something and it was just It's almost like what he did for a week last week. He's old. He doesn't play and then for a week He's like i'll just be the best player in the nba for like four or five games in the playoffs Yeah, I felt he's I felt he's been cooked like six times. That was one of them They're like, oh they get nothing from Kawhi and it was just over Ron Hexdahl is 61 cousin. Yes uncle of Leah Cousin of Leah. I used to love Ron Hexdahl

Frankie Valley 91. Oh, he did Greece Blake loves Greece song. I love Greece. It's a great song. Sing it. It's a good movie. I have no, I do have an opinion on this. Amy Ryan is 57. Nope. No, she's from the office. Oh, I'm back in. Only murders in the building.

Bobby Cannaval, 55. Everybody got a gun. Is that him really yeah, Christina Hendricks is 50 God has never done finer work Is that the redhead you were talking sushi? Fucking cool put anything I'm eating it Liz early has something to say about that. I don't know who that is Elizabeth early. Oh, I thought you said Liz Hurley. Elizabeth Prime, Elizabeth Hurley is...

Cheryl Burke is 41. You know her from Dancing with the Stars, also. Married to Chris Burke. No. No. That's not the case. Rachel Zegler is 24. No. Did you say Renee Zellweger? You know her as Woke Snow White. Oh. She's the new Snow White. Damn, the one who killed the movie. Yeah. That's a great story. That is a great great Hollywood story. I mean the movie might have just

Awesome. Well, it was amazing because they cast They cast seven little people and then Peter Dinklage got mad about it and was like, oh, how stereotypical is this? It's seven dwarfs. They cast actual dwarfs and then Disney was like, okay Then we'll replace them with regular people and then all all of the dwarf actors were like, you idiot. Yes. This is the only movie that's seven jobs. Yeah, it finally. What if they want to make a second one?

Right. That's exactly when they re-did Willy Wonka. Yeah. And Hugh Grant was the Limpa Limpas. And all the little people were like, what the? That's like 40 jobs. And then the movie ended up making no money Is it as a very funny? What do you want from us little people? Yeah?

We're trying and our birthday of today. We got little golf clubs for you now Opswing golf dot birthday of the day Dedicated to my wife. Oh. Is this why you left the house today? Willie Geist is 50. Oh my god, the riding lawn mower. Wow.

I told her it was Willie Geist's birthday and she got right out onto the lawn mower. Geist geyser. So maybe it'll have run out of gas by now. I don't know Okay, um born on this day now dead Niccolo Machiavelli name a year. He was alive any year Machiavelli Okay, uh I got I got a year locked in lockers in I have it 1675. I got mine to 1574 I got mine 1425 1699 me and Blake both might be right nobody got it 1469 to 1527 I was very close dude yeah that was an entire college course course Cheater look at this guy with books with the college. Oh look who went to college

I was an extra college after I think it's one of my master's classes. Well, you know every president reads it so It's true King Trump's read that God that cop is hey, let's ask this cop if he thinks cops are getting hotter God, that cop is... Hey, let's ask this cop if he thinks cops are getting hotter. Go ahead. Ask him if he thinks... What does he deadlift?

Sir? We heard you. Do you have a moment? Can you get the wireless? Here we go. Come on. TC. Okay.

Two minutes? Why, just because he's hot? Come on. Yeah, just one second. We had a question. It's a quick question. Quick question. Quick question.

It'll be okay. You can put it on. It'll be okay. Look, he's nervous and make okay. Don't be nervous We appreciate you being here. We think cops are getting hotter. You're really hot is what he's saying They don't have like nasty fat cops. Oh, why do you use to be the stereotype, right? Yeah, we don't want to do that You have like Requirements physical requirements. Yeah, are they harder. Are they harder than they used to be? They're about the same, just that you have a time limit. You have to do like a mile and a half, man.

Somebody push ups, sit ups in order to get hired. And if you fail that, are you on walking or bike duty? Is that sort of- No, that's to get hired. So like you can't even get hired unless you're compatible. I saw a guy on the Segway downtown the other day. Is that a coveted job or look down upon? Yeah, that's that's not a police officer. That's a parking a force. No, I swear this guy was a DPD a Downtown Dallas officer. Oh, I don't know about Dallas. I work at McKinney, but if you saw that guy

Okay I do work out Where the best what's the bench at? What's my bench? Yeah. 150 pounds. His boss is buying it. Thank you sir. With a wink. With a wink. Thank you.

Thank you for your service. Thank you. Well he didn't. That guy would crush my head with one hand. I want to play. How many times has Saroy slurred a thank you for your service? He said that. I was going to say.

That was cat. I was going to say how many times he said, who you bench? Who you bench? God's happy. Who you bench? Bro. Probably not that much. Look at these guns.

James Brown, born on this day now dead. You know who he is? Blake? Did that help? James Brown, born on this day now dead. You know who he is? Ha! Blake? Ah! Did that help? The singer that does those noises. Gotta kiss myself!

The one who sings the Hot Tub song. Once got in trouble for domestic violence, like knocking his wife around, and I think went on CNN for an interview right after it. It resulted, as a matter of fact, in Brown assaulting his wife around. Yeah. And I think went on CNN for an interview right after it. It resulted as a matter of fact in Brown assaulting his wife with a lead pipe and firing a gun at a car that she was in. These are charges that Brown denies. He was released yesterday on $15,000 bond. He joins us from Atlanta to discuss the charges and we welcome you James Brown. How did all of this trouble begin? Living in America.

Nothing wrong. Nothing wrong at all? You're not in any difficulty but you're out on bond. No I'm not. Have all the charges been dropped? Yeah I'm out on love. Well are you out on love or out of love? which is it? I don't know Tonight you Yeah, anyway, that's fantastic. I didn't know about that

minutes long yeah 1988 interview no cocaine involved there at all no Born on this day now dead Dwayne Haskins. Oh, you know Dan. Of course, Dwayne Haskins. He's living to die. Dwayne the Rock.

Dwayne the Rock Haskins. And the very next day, Sirius XM is doing their NFL radio show and they had Gil Brandt as one of the hosts that they were talking about. Got to know the young man a little bit, but also from a scouting standpoint, you analyzed him over the years at Ohio State and coming into the league with the Washington Commanders and then going to the Pittsburgh Steelers.

Obviously it's a terrible tragedy and what wanted your thoughts on that? Also on the player because you did chronicle his career very closely. And also on the player because you did chronicle his career very closely. Well, you know, Dan, I hate anytime anybody is killed or anybody dies. That's where to stop, right? But here we go. He was a guy that was living to be dead, so to speak.

You know, they told him, don't under any circumstances leave school early. You just, you just don't have the work habits. You don't have this, you don't under any circumstances leave school early. You just don't have the work habits, you don't have this, you don't have that. What do you do? Left school early. I always remember this, we invited players to the draft and he was one of the players we invited to the draft and we were told no, we're going to have our own party. His own party was a party at the bowling alley, charging $50 to get into the bowling alley for his party. It was all something, you know?

Think of the tiki-taka things he is upset about. Yeah, I mean, I knew that night. He came out early. I knew that night that guy would be dead soon He came out early. He wouldn't go to the NFL draft. He had his own party So if this guy charge a date for a party glad he's dead Might as well be dead Hey, do you guys there's a woman over here with a jean jacket on my right? I hadn't seen any women I can't tell if she has no hand or if she...

I see a limb. I see a limb. It's just, it's like a cane. What if she had no hand and now you're on the PA like, hey, is there some lady without a hand over there? Right. And I'll have to one over. One lady.

I would say come on over and tell us how'd you lose your hand? How does she golf? Because dude, I saw the other day, I saw a TikTok the other day of a lady who was missing like at forearm and she had like a series of things she would attach to it. Yeah. Swiss army on, like I'm telling you, she was demonstrating, she was hot as heck too.

So like an ice cream scooper? Yeah, absolutely. Or a pizza rope rope pizza slicer. An air pump. Yeah. You're playing volleyball with the boys. Jackhammer. Air pump.

Your tires low. Air pump. She's like, I got it. Boom. She's got a, you want to hit dab rip? Jackhammer. Dab. She's got the butane.

A little PSI indicator out of her elbow. Vacuum. Leaf blower. Weed whacker. That sounds like the luckiest lady in the world. Features galore. I had a friend of mine in college who had no arm at all, I think I told you guys this, and had like a hand the size of about a quarter, like a United States coin quarter on her shoulder.

That tiny little doll hand. Yes. No, like, yeah, exactly. Smaller than that even. And she would hold a pencil. Like when she's working, she would hold a pencil like when she's working She would hope put a pencil up there and you stop she great. Yes. Yes operational hand

Yeah That's awesome. Yeah also Beautiful. Yeah, this one is very very attractive gorgeous. Yeah. Yeah She was but the fact there was operational I operational, I can grab pencils, pens. Did you? I can hold. No, I didn't do anything other than work on group projects at a high level.

Were you attracted to her? Would you have did it? Yes. Was there thought of having it removed? You know what I mean? You can't. I wasn't close enough to her. But it worked.

Yes. But it worked. Why would you remove it if it was just hanging there? It seemed like it would get in the way. No, it does. It helps her. If you had one, yeah, wouldn't you love that? If you only have one arm and the other one

helps a little bit, it's like having a little clip on your arm. It's like when you have the grocery store and you got all the plastic bags and you've got too many bags. Right. You can just put one arm. Would it be big enough to hold your phone? Because that'd be a great place to hang it.

Not Jake's phone. And think how big you would say something in your hand Yeah Mr.. Bolt right Even I would look big That's very it was strange Interesting none nonetheless But you like she was attractive enough that you would know she was very have wanted to date her

Even with the tiny are probably out of of my league. Good looking. Even with that. Yeah. All right. Also born on this day now today, Greg Gumbel. Greg Gumbel's dead? Yeah, sorry. December 2024. Yeah. I was going through some things. COVID. Dead on this day, still dead. I'll just give some things. COVID. Yeah, COVID. Dead or to stay still dead, I'll just give you one on this very day. Oh, it's going to be who? Dan Marino? Earl Woods.

Oh. The inventor of golf. Yeah. The hug. Yeah. Damn it. And that was Today in History. Damn it. And that was today in history. Damn it.

What a time. On moving day. Moving day at the CJ Cup by Ryn Nelson. We got little person golf clubs. Thank you Tito's. We got Tito's. Tito's Handmade Baca. Elite Ride.

Yes, thanks for the Elite Ride over here. Unreal. Thanks to Tito's Handmade Vodka for bringing us out here. Thanks to the CJ Cup Byron Nelson for actually allowing us. Let's see if this jingles any better. Thanks to Emily Jones. Yeah, thanks to Emily Jones and The Mom Game

for their cooperation. CJ Cup Byron Nelson, the duns don't run to you by Tito Mom Game for their cooperation. Did you just create that while she was here? Yeah. Jake's really into AI. Yeah, I know, I'm impressed. It's got a little Indian kick to it, Dan at Dan Dan that's so you that you worked up now How about you bite? I do know that you're a you're a bit of a troll online sometimes like you will Put a picture of you and Mike and be like coming soon

It'll be like like selling me. me can we get Mike and cash saroi together again broadcasting oh we do we're doing that no I'm asking if we can get that ever I'm the people are clamped yeah cash I got a search I hold my anus cash saroi puts on Twitter did you not do this like six months ago and then I there were some thoughts okay so you were still thinking it's all I know we've been thinking a whole lot you're thinking about doing something and I will say we are absolutely doing something if you are among the dozens who are a fan of the

service Roy show back in the day we're bringing this bitch back you will be Yeah. If you are among the dozens who are a fan of the Circus Roy Show back in the day, we're bringing this bitch back. You will be brought back. We'll be brought back. We're bringing it back. The Circus Roy Show. You guys hitting up Kat? He's not responded to the emails.

I called him, but do you guys keep numbers of people you don't ever want to text in your phone? Absolutely. Yeah, I don't ever delete them. I got Larry Bird. I keep every number. I deleted them when I was like drinking for sure. I was just like, I don't ever want to.

It's probably wise that you did that. Oddly enough, that was a good thing. I made several wise decisions. I was good at managing it. Give me a little credit. But yeah, I don't think he'd call you back. But what are we looking at? We're doing the damn thing.

I would just say this month at some point. It's on. And in some form, most definitely including my brother Cash and myself, Mike Saroy, we're going to bring the Cirque du Saroy show back online, YouTube. Online. YouTube, Twitch.

The whole, YouTube? On YouTube. Whoa, that's a big platform. But we won't be alone. YouTube, Twitch. The whole, YouTube? On YouTube. Whoa, that's a big platform. But we won't be alone. Are you going to be on kick? We'll have a third man. A man?

And we'll reveal that person at a later date. Oh, these guys. Would you announce it on this show someday? I would love to. I would love to. But I would say as far as right now, if you are a person who goes on YouTube maybe go to Cirque du Saroy and throw down a subscribe on that thing because we're gonna have some fun shit coming up very soon within the next couple weeks. Hell yeah. It is gonna be different. It is gonna be live. All we wanna do is something different live

and a f'n party. It is weird effing party and we have so much pent-up shit that we got to get out and You guys got to find that goddamn painting The reveal Big reveal a couple weeks from now. Thank you Tito's. We gotta go before this becomes a dude. Thank you for watching my video. Please subscribe and type for my name if you want to watch more of my videos. Hey, it's uh, it's Tyler.

I need you to do me a huge favor. Please, you gotta give me this right now. Can you take your name off your phone? My wife has her phone and she may be calling you. Take your name off your phone. God, give this right now. Just to have your eyes on the bar. Your whole body's moving and your senses are more heightened and everything seems to flow better.

Again and again and again. I enjoy that. It's a great feeling. I'm addicted. Can you take your name? Mom's your phone. My wife's on my phone and uh, maybe call me. Take your name off your phone.

You gotta do this for me. Just to have a nice, a number. Take your name off your phone. My wife threw my phone and uh, maybe call me. Take your name off your phone. I went on through my phone and, uh, they'd be calling. Take your name off your phone. You got to do this for me. Just know that I see my number.