The Dumb Zone FREE - Verne Troyer Celebrity Wife Swap and Today in Fast Food with Mike Sirois | DZ 3-6-25

Episode Date: March 6, 2025

Get every episode of The Dumb Zone by subscribing at DumbZone.com or Patreon.com/TheDumbZoneSeverance Sirois re-focuses Dan for today's show. We've got what's new in fast food with Clayton, Sirois talks about his exit from The Freak, we watched the Celebrity Wife Swap episode featuring Hines Ward and Verne Troyer, and Sirois explains the time he had to sneak out of a girl's apartment (00:00) - Open: With Mike Sirois (24:07) - Today in Fast Food with Clayton (42:45) - Dan drove a Cybertruck (51:20) - Sports: Celebrity Wife Swap with Verne Troyer (01:29:20) - Severance Sirois' exit from The Freak (01:37:06) - Viewer Mail/Gummy Thoughts (01:58:42) - News: Porch pirate turned murder plot (02:27:23) - VM birthdays/Today in History ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Hello, I'm Dan McDowell, longtime professional broadcaster. Why subscribe to our Patreon podcast? Well, perhaps you support our struggle to get out from under the oppressive thumb of the man. Or objectively, if you sign up at patreon.com slash the dumb zone, you will get the two episodes per week that are available on all podcast platforms like this one. Plus an additional two episodes each week that are exclusive to Patreon. So subscribing on Patreon gets you four episodes per week. Oh my, what a bargain.

Now, on to today's program. No. Pump. Me. I mean the relationship between Luca and, specifically, Nico Harrison really went to poop this year. Went to poop? What are you listening to dude? Hi Dan.

The Hoop Collective. Hello Mike Saroy. How you doing? Fine. I'm psyched. Psyched for the show today. DZ time. You're on the show, huh?

Well, I hope so, man. I think. What are you doing? What's the matter? I'm wallowing in my sorrow. Well, I hope so, man. I think. What are you doing? What's the matter? I'm wallowing in my sorrow. I can't stop thinking about this Luca thing, man. Still?

Yeah, I go to bed, I'm thinking about it. I wake up, I'm thinking about it. You need to forget. You can do it. I can't forget it. You can forget anything. Hey, Severance. Severance? I'm Severance Zerui, dude. I got you. I can help you forget about this whole deal.

What have you forgot? Work. Work. So you can make me forget Luca? Absolutely. Easy. How? Come with me. Come. Come, come. Okay

My guess damn what's up, brother? How you doing man? I'm good. I'm psyched. Oh Gonna be on the show today, brother? How you doing, man? I'm good, dude. I'm psyched. Oh, no. You're going to be on the show today, right? Got it. Hell yeah, I am. Let's go. You see the Cowboys signed Osa? Osa is back! You want to talk about that? I do. We got the Arnold Palmer this week, Bay Hill. Oh, how about... Oh, you ready for March Madness? Am I ready for March Madness? Yes! March! Alright, alright, alright, alright. Alright, alright, alright, alright. I never listen. I'm gonna listen. I wanna listen to the drums on you.

Morikawa? Where are we going with? Who's gonna win this thing? I'm gonna listen. I wanna listen. I wanna listen to the drums on you Oh, now you're just not taking things seriously Alright, alright, alright, alright, alright Alright, alright, alright, alright, alright Good afternoon everybody, I'm Dan McDowell

I'm Jake Cupp I'm Blake Jones I'm Mike S I wanna listen to the John Jones song And we have Clayton K and And we are broadcasting live to tape. And perhaps live to live on YouTube. I don't know. That's above my pay grade.

That's a business thing to say, right? Yeah, it feels like it's fallen out of favor a little bit. You're not supposed to pass the buck. Well, anyway. Happy Thursday. Thanks for being here, Mike S. Hell yeah. Thanks for having me, dumb zone.

What about Cantlay? I love Cantlay this week. At 30 to 1. Oh,, solid. I'm team Matsuyama this week but keep an eye on Cantlay obviously. Because of the irons. Well yeah. Yeah. 200 plus yard approach shots, Matsuyama specialty and that's a big big key at Bay Hill. Can he keep it in the fecking fairway though? We'll find out. Today we have a couple of sit-ins.

We have Darren Dawson. Hi. Who's looking awesome. Thank you, thank you. Bracing my Luca fandom. You have a... Who? Who? Yeah, that's right.

Do you have a shirt on under the knife, that? Gotta be a bit here we go boosh Still still real Okay Yeah, it's still real and your buddy Brian does Brian have last name on me to lose Brian Wagner Somebody one of these two smells like weed Do you think it's the guy dressed in the purple

Purple cush over there submit strength of the the weed smell could have been Gina Miller Could have been I saw Gina Miller like I told you guys it's a great Sports Center commercial up here I see Gina Miller trying a little food on the tend. It's amazing. Showing us what they got out at FC Dallas this year. Huh? Is this where they shoot the floor? Thanks for the eatsies, guys. Yeah. Where's that at?

I haven't seen that yet. I want to meet Rob. Rob doesn't come in till 4. 4 o'clock? I'll stay. I got my visitor badge. I don't know if there's a time on it. They did bring eatsies.

And I pulled a real ferret move of I saved some of the chips that we got from eatsies the other day. And now I just have a backlog of chips. Because I saved some of the chips that we got from Eatsies the other day, and now I just have a backlog of chips. Because I felt like it would have been a jerk when they asked for our order to be like, also get me chips. I felt weird, yeah, Blake asked what I wanted,

and I was like, turkey cheese sandwich. So I'm like, I'm gonna keep it simple, I don't want anyone. And he's like, what kind of bread, what spread? I'm like, oh fuck. Well when you go to Eatsies. I've got a million options in front of me. Why. I know. Well when you go to Eatsies. I've got a million options in front of me.

Why did I know you were ordering online? So I was literally trying to keep it as simple as possible and then it made it more complex by you than making me fill in all those. I felt bad for the follow-up, but I wanted to make sure you got what you wanted. I think we both felt bad. I'm sitting on a lot of chips.

Sandwich came out perfect. Yeah. Delicious. I have something to announce, but since we did a pre-show bit. Yeah. Thanks for doing a bit. No problem.

If you got Mike Saroy, you gotta do a bit. So we didn't do a pre-show spot. No, but if we would have, it would have been Farlease Navidad. Farlease.org, that is where you're gonna lease your next vehicle or at least check them out. Save you some time, you're not trying to go spend a whole Saturday at the dealership with all the sports,

with March Madness coming up. Oh my gosh, Bay Hill? I assume the College World Series takes place at some point. You can save. It's always around the corner. Hey, settle in for the WNBA drafts with the time that you saved by going through Fair Lease. If you go to their website, fairlease.org,

click on request a quote, then how did you hear about us? You'll tell them us, the dumb zone. Do that, that's very important. That is very, very important. Because then they'll be like, cool, we'll treat you right. See, they won't treat everyone right. No, I heard from actually somebody who told them that they heard about it on PBS. Yeah.

So they leased the car from Fair Lease and instead of delivering it to that person's home, wrecked it right into a building. Yeah. That's what they'll do if you say anything but the dumb zone. That may seem unfair, but those are the rules with Fair Lease at fairlease.org. Yeah. So even if you've never heard of us. If you call them sometimes they just answer the phone,

ugh, what? And you're like, no, the dumb zone sent me. Right, yes sir. Oh, I'm sorry, yeah. Of course, yeah. Life will change. Right this way. All right, so I just wanted to announce

that it's now a fish. April 4th, we're definitely doing a show in San Antonio and the reason I can say this is because even if somehow Lone Star said oh we now don't want you to Lone Star Beer is sending us down to San Antonio to do a program at a unknown location as of yet. The final four is in San Antonio. Did you say that already? I did not. Okay.

I just thought- And it's that weekend. Yeah, that's important as well. How would it be clear about the- But Friday, April 4th, we will do a show somewhere in San Antonio. So right now, make your plans. The reason I can say this is because I've locked in the April 3rd through the 5th, VRBO in San Antonio.

Heck yeah. I have a place. The boys are back. Damn. Five bedrooms. Oh, I get a bedroom? Five separate bedrooms. Unless Mike Saroy says, yes, I get a bedroom? Five separate bedrooms.

Unless Mike Saroy says, yes, I'll join. I'll sleep on a couch to have Mike Saroy there for two nights. We got a pool? What kind of features? There's a pond. A pond for you. Yeah. Pond guy.

Yeah. Bay Hill season. I love it. Yeah, pond, natural spring water. Good for you. Damn it, I'm in. So, yeah, we may or may not, we're thinking about stopping in Austin on the way

and doing a program. We'll get to that later. I don't wanna reveal too much just yet. We'll slow trickle this out throughout the month. Bracket Dan at the Final Four. Are you kidding me? Who would you think that is? That's the thing.

To see you, those eyes. That's my place. Those eyes wider than they've ever been. I was thinking this morning, Are you kidding me? Who would think that? That's the thing. To see you, those eyes. That's my place. Those eyes wider than they've ever been. I was thinking this morning, I was trying to think of if we had a bracket, because it's bracket season. Don't look like that. You know you're excited.

It's always bracket season. Could we have a bracket for the best bracket? And I thought like a number one seed would be comedy movies. Okay, that's a number one seed. Yeah. A number 16 seed would be like funny things about the Holocaust. That would be a 16 seed, right? You're gonna make that plate sway into the tournament?

Cause I feel like that's more of an eight or nine Really? There's a lot of that's a mid-major conference champion right there. Yeah, no, I think like I Think okay, then tell me what's the lowest seed a 16 is like his like ranking chips And even that may have a little more juice than that. You know, it needs to be something really, really spare. I mean, I'll just fall on the sword and tell you,

a bracket, a small bracket of earnest movies would be a 16. Oh man. It is, look, it's not for everyone. But you know, like a ranking of 80. Since he can't make funniest movies bracket. Exactly. Is that what you're saying? Yeah. You know, another top ranking of 80s. Since he can't make funniest movies, bracket. Exactly. Is that what you're saying?

Yeah. All right. You know, another top first would be the longest feud we've had here. I remember. You're like ranking 80s movie titty scenes. Okay. That's a strong seed, but not a one.

80 movie tits. Yeah. Still shots. That's a good seed, though. How about airplane? Number one. Oh my gosh, for sure. Fast times.

Yeah, but those jugs of airplane are... And that's the thing about fast times is probably a one seed. That's the thing about brackets. They spark this kind of debate. Yeah, fast times is a one seed in that. Yeah. This bracket is moving up the bracket rankings as we debate. What about a bracket of movies that had to be paused? Well, I guess that would be similar. 80s, 70s. But I just remember pausing it and watching Animal House when the girl jumps out of the car.

Just take a look, take a look. I did the same thing with the Dirk Diggler scene in Boogie Nights when he's in the mirror. So you could see his wiener? Long shot. How's that feel? Did you have a, I used to have a VHS tape in Boogie Nights when he's in the mirror. So you could see his wiener? Yeah. Long shot. How's that feel? Did you have a, I used to have a VHS tape

where I recorded hot MTV videos. Of course you did. And then obviously Playback for Use. And it's weird because there's no actual nudity in anything but I can get Tawny Kittane hanging out of the car. Not one song. Then I remember the fabulous Thunderbirds Tough Enough video where they're all kinda doing

construction, there's hot girls in little shorts. It'll work. And I was telling these guys the other day, that's part of why wrestling in the Attitude era was such a big player for me. You could just go rent the uncut Divas VHS in like 1997. It was just softcore porn. There was a- You could have a full on bra and panties match.

Yes you could. For the Divas champion. And there was a wrestler who was simply a pimp. And so he would come to the ring with three prostitutes. And it was a lower tier wrestler. Ah, it was a mid tier wrestler. It was a godfather. A bracket of mid tier wrestler.

He'd come with girls. He was followed by his ho train. The ho train. Yeah, that's right. The Ho train. Yeah, that's right. And that was- Sometimes offer them to the opponent. That worked very well.

Yeah. VHS era. Yeah, watching that wrestling or WWE or F or whatever documentary. The Vince McMahon documentary. Have you seen that? Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it's great. There was a lot of that stuff.

I love the traveling circus. You guys know that. I grew up a wrestling fan, so I'm aligned with you on this. We went to WrestleMania together, me and Mike Sorrell. Hell yes. The Rock came out with a flamethrower. Yep, the New Day came out of a giant box of bootie-o's cereal. Bootie-o's, yeah.

When did you cover the John Cena heel turn, yesterday or day before? We briefly did talk about it on Tuesday because Clayton was very affected by it. Okay, good. Clayton's back. They're excited. I watched this effing thing and I seriously- Live? Yeah, I did.

I did. We're on the road to WrestleMania, all right? Like, I only watch Raw. I don't watch SmackDown. I'm a fucking weirdo. Yeah, of course. But I literally went, I gasped. So when I was watching that documentary

and then I heard about the John Cena heel, whatever, heel turn, I thought to myself, well, of course, that's the documentary just lays that out. That's what they do. This is their bit. Well, yeah, they all do. Most of them jump back and forth, but John Cena has never, because they make so much money selling his T-shirts and shit. This one I'm excited. Well, yeah, they all do. Most of them jump back and forth, but John Cena's never,

because they make so much money selling his t-shirts and shit. This one I'm excited. No, there's money. This one's on par with Hulk. Right. Well, that's what I mean, because Hulk was a major situation.

Are you saying that, you're approaching this far too logically. Well, yeah, it's like when people were, I can't believe Dale Earnhardt died. I mean, how would anyone die who drives 210 miles an hour, you know, with 50 other people driving that exact same speed and they're, you know, a millimeter apart? It's insane that he would die. No, it's not insane at all.

But Sena, but Sena, Dan. It's John like Sena. It's John MFing Sena. You can't see him. That's a whole different thing. That's a whole different thing I don't even know what that means It was like the Red Wedding and I don't want a night How have like in the the content economy that we live in now now that Shane and everyone else has done the make-a-wish Joke series. How do we not have a series of tick tocks this week?

Where parents of kids with Down syndrome are just getting their reaction to the news? Oh brother, there were. There were? There's crying kids. Okay, but I, yeah, that, I want crying kids who are mentally disabled. Sure you can Google that exact sentence and see how it works. I mean, I'm serious. Like, that's their history. Is this your new videos to watch on a guy's trip?

Yeah, I mean, in general, I'm not a huge fan of- Menally disabled kids crying. Laughing at that. It's one of my few weak spots, to be honest. But I think, you know, when you incorporate the scene angle. Well, what if they do kind of remember how Kimmel would do the bit where he tells a lie to his two kids about I ate all your Halloween candy or whatever and then they start crying. Would you would you endorse something

like that with so just if you have a kid with Down syndrome so Kimmel promotes I want you to lie to them about... I would would not okay. I would draw the line there Okay, I just wanted to see I don't know that that's a good bit anyways Like I don't we're seeing it type thing, but if the kids are ready really upset about Sina And he has down syndrome. I think there's a comedic play. Okay, I see. All right I'm just looking for what the rules are Anyways I'm just looking for what the rules are. Anyways. Anyways indeed.

I want to remind people about Jimmy's show tonight by simply telling you go to jimmynelsoncomedy.com. He's in Fort Worth at Big Laugh Comedy. It's like 10 bucks. Go check him out. Okay, if we're doing quick hits like that, Lone Star wanted me to pimp that They have pit masters with purpose for Zavala's barbecue tonight

Fajita and caviar tacos what think of that I Can't I said think of it Smoked 44 Farms prime rib and a Pitsmore Surprise for dessert. Tickets available at BBQDistro.com. D-I-S-T-R-O. There it is. All proceeds will support the Zavala Family Foundation which gives back to those in the barbecue community impacted by cancer. It's a very specific but needed. Right, they got a bit tonight. Yeah. So if you wanna get out there.

You're dealing with a lot of smoke. There were guesses that my dad got cancer because of all the inhalation of fumes because of working on boats. That would make sense. And it makes sense to me. So maybe. Do you have lung cancer?

No. Just in general, the carcinogens. Yeah, exactly, carcinogens indoor with exhaust. Dude, you probably don't have to deal with this because you're not married, but she is, your lady is a hippie. Are you not getting fucking microplastic shit shoved? We had to change our detergent. She didn't change her deodorant by any chance No, you did this didn't you know we did all of it. Yeah, he did. Yeah, I mean out of glass now

Yeah, you're eating out of glass things. Mm-hmm had to get rid of all the plastic can't microwave it. I Gotta have weird granola bars because of different seed oils Are things breaking now? You can't drop it. No, we haven't broken one yet. It's funny because my wife just went on a work trip and she's like, oh, for this one I'll use real deodorant. It's just like when they say they don't need a man.

It's like, yeah, well, what about when there's somebody breaking into your house? He's like, oh, I'm not gonna use the aluminum-free deodorant on a trip. Why? Well, because it doesn't work. It doesn't work at all. You just don't smell bad enough on a daily basis to notice.

I'm with the wives on this one a little bit. It's way too late, dude. It's like way too, you have no- I've ingested too many. You have no shot. I switched to this glass bottle, how many years ago? Five years ago or so? And I've used nothing but this.

I'll still drink out of a plastic occasionally, but I used to just refill my big plastic bottle. And I thought, oh, that's. Now glass. I don't know. My mom, somebody told me they read something about something and I was like, all right, well, I'll buy these glass bottles and they're great.

And I also know when I complete the Rod Stewart challenge in a day is I drink four of these. Is a gallon. I'm just surprised you don't have this phone. Oh, no, I got none of it. You know nothing about any of this? I've heard of, I mean, I've heard of a couple of it, a couple of things, but no, we've made no changes. She's probably not, the problem is she's not on Facebook,

right? She's not on there all the time. No, it's an Instagram thing now too. This is the 20s and 30s and 40s woman is now somehow aligned with RFK. Mike was talking before the show started that he's very concerned about quote, the big one. Yeah, I'm calling my shot.

The big one's happening. The big what? Earthquake. Cause he's going somewhere, you're going to Oregon, you should, pfft. Wait, this weekend? Maybe today, I don't know. Okay, do you know?

Wait, what if it happens in a year and a half? Does Mike Soraya get the credit? Yeah, I think right now, he's making it sound like it could happen during this administration. If it does, then yeah, it's on his call. Yeah, do we have a time window? I'm not. I think soon.

Do you not think we're incredibly overdue for the big one? It has been over 150 years since the last major earthquake. Wait, what does that mean? I thought like 1980 something there was an earthquake, the World Series. It says in 2018 this quote was 144 years ago. It says the clock is ticking.

It is very likely that the Hayward Fault will rupture and produce a significant earthquake within the next 30 years. Where's that fault? I know it's in California. All I know about is San Andreas. That's the one I grew up with. Back in my day that's what we cared about. Is it bringing it back to Gene Hackman because of Superman? Yeah but I

mean before that that was a very common... Yeah of course the San Andreas fault. Just in pop culture. The Rock. Yeah and they talk about the blueprint. He showed you what was gonna look like. I just think we're long overdue. And mainly because I'm going to San Francisco in a month or so, so it's crossed my mind, the second my plane lands. The second it gets to a slow enough speed on the landing to where it can't just take off again and take me to safety is the second that it hits. That was the selling point that my mom tried to give me for buying a plot of land, a way overpriced,

way too small plot of land in Hot Springs, Arkansas. Don't you still own it? Yeah. It's just a- How'd I remember that? It's just a money suck. That's right. It's like a $35 a month or $40 a month.

Can we not build a studio there? We could. But it's only like a quarter acre. $35 a month or $40 a month. Can we not build a studio there? We could. But it's only like a quarter acre. She paid like $5,000 for it 10 years ago. It's just sitting there every day. Because my Uncle Gary had built a house there and she thought, she got all horny about it and thought, oh, I'll buy this plot of land and I'll move there eventually.

I'll retire and move there and then live by Uncle Gary. Well, then Uncle Gary goes and dies. And then she is not doing that great as far as financially. So she gifted me this thing that I can't even sell. Nobody would buy it. I called and tried. They would take it back as a donation. Yeah. And so I just still own it just to own it. But it's like I said, it's like 40 bucks a month, property, what do you call it? Like HOA type thing. If I live there, it's like an 80 bucks a month. If there was a house on it.

Is there any water? Like, is there anything? No, nothing's built on it at all. It's woods, yeah. But you have been there? Yeah, well, cause I've been to Uncle Gary's many times. So it's just the piece of land across the street that it's the woods, but take a court.

The point is when we were there, she's like, this is so inland. There's going to be earthquakes. There's going to be tornadoes and floods and not here. Yeah. This will be perfect. This is going to be the prime real estate at some point. In a sense, you have a bunker.

In a sense, but there's nothing built there. I wonder if we could build something there and then do an Airbnb thing. Of course you could. There you go. Cost you a few hundred grand to really double down on this property. Well, that's why I said we. I can I can't do it, but maybe the dumb zone. It's going to be oceanfront property in a few decades. Don't we need to diversify? We just came off Business Wednesday, so we're really

stoked on stuff. Don't we need to get in some other lanes? Definitely. All right, you know what? God damn it, I'm in. You're in? You got it. I'm in you're in yeah I'm in you got it hey I have a new segment that's gonna feature Clayton and it's

brought to you by own well then all right own well will help you save on your property taxes and listen it's the same well calm it's the same as Fair Lease. Onwell.com. It's the same as Fair Lease. Slash dumb zone or just dumb zone is our, how do you do that? Slash the dumb zone. Onwell.com slash the dumb zone. It's the same as with Fair Lease.

It's going to save you time. You can listen to your wife. Yeah. You could do some chores because you're not going to have to spend hours with your property tax appeal. Onwell will do it for you in just a few minutes. do some chores because you're not going to have to spend hours with your property tax appeal. OwnWell will do it for you in just a few minutes. They only take any money from you if they make you money. So that's about 86% of customers. If you're in that 14%, it's no harm, no foul. Sign up in just a few minutes. OwnWell.com slash the dumb zone. Save time,

likely save money, and with no real commitment on your part to do it. Hey, can I interrupt you? Property tax assessments come out in March. Yes. Around mid-March. Most counties in Texas will have their assessments, so then it'll be a major push to get signups at ownwell.com slash the dumb zone before the general deadline of May 15th. So, uh. Get on it. Yeah. So for mid March through mid May,

remember the ease of using own well, ownwell.com slash the dumb zone. So the new segment featuring Clayton Kimbrough is it's pretty straightforward. He told us before the show that quote, I spend a lot of time on R slash fast food. He said a lot. And interestingly, um, well, if you look at Clayton, he's a man of size. No, when Clayton said that, nobody was like, what you do? Yeah. Everybody's just

nodded like, oh, okay. Yeah. He seems like it's the it's do you take that as an insult I hope not no I've been big my whole life okay yeah it's no different you said you got some kind of ozempic thing going on right yeah it's a whole thing yeah but but like with your doctor that you don't trust because of his size you know I if he says hey hey, I have my finger on the pulse of fast food, I believe him. And getting into what Reddit threads exist is a whole other very interesting topic because I told you guys I watched Waterworld

on a recent ski trip and I'm like, this movie's so, how would anybody give this a second thought? Thousands on r slash Waterworld Yeah, it's excellent. It exists, as does r slash fast food. And I just thought Clayton could kind of update us on what's hot in the space this week. Thanks, Jake. Yeah, we have some great things coming out

from some of our favorites. Burger King is bringing back the jalapeno cheddar bites. Okay, wow. So, you know, little cheddar cheese, little jalapeno fried up. It's like fair food. I feel like Burger King, if I just gave it a shot to earn my business again.

You know, a BK guy? I don't eat that much fast food anymore, but even when I did, I would just stick to McDonald's or Water Burger. I don't know why. Yeah. I like the Impossible Whopper is it good Oh, yeah, but it takes chances. They did chicken fries, right? Yeah, the chicken fries the spicy chicken fries are amazing

Dude, you think McDonald's has the balls for jalapeno cheddar bites. No, no, that's what I'm saying No, it feels like big it feels like Burger King is kind of like the big 12 like it It's not great. But if you give it a shot, you're probably gonna have a good time. We've had this discussion, like what fast food you've eaten the most in your life if you just accumulate every single fast food meal you've ever had and then rank them, and I think Burger King is my number one.

Really? Yeah. I think I've always just tended to live near a Burger King. That's not always a good sign. It's probably a terrible sign. Another tie-in, it's the Oklahoma State of the Big 12. It's just, it's always there. Yeah. It's got some flashy moves every now and again. Overall substance is a little low. Yeah, it doesn't give you, you know, give you a win every time, but it's good. I used to love that chicken sandwich, the OG chicken sandwich. Yeah, I did too. It was so good and I'm gonna have one forever.

I did download the McDonald's app recently and Christina saw it on my phone and she said why you download the McDonald's app? And I literally couldn't think of anything. I said I just want to be on the right side of history. I walked out of the room and I just kind of stand by it. It's Friday on McDonald's. Right, every time I look at it they're giving you something essentially for free. If you just kind of... You're an idiot to not have the app Yeah, Blake is a whole guy on this McDonald's app all out. Okay, their deals are amazing. I think every app Yeah, so is the thought now everybody's got our information. Why not?

Yeah, yeah, whatever dude when you pull it in the McDonald's can my information really be that valuable anymore? It does away since everybody has it, like yeah. When you pull into McDonald's, they say, Did you order it on the app? Did you order on the app or the first thing they ask you? Yeah. You know, no. And I'm a big fan of not talking to other people,

so if they could just have my food ready when I get there, that'd be awesome. I'm just pulling the space. Yeah. The other thing that you get on the app, and this is big in the fast food space, is customization. Like if you want to order a water burger, you're a fool not to do it on the app.

There's cheeses you don't know about. There's sauces that you're gonna feel weird asking for. There are endless options on there. And the employee will probably tell you, no, we can't do that. Right. Yeah, you can. Or throw some sass at you.

Yeah, yeah. I don't think you can put honey butter on a burger. Five feet, and I'll put it in this ass. The hell I can't. Dude, a couple. And then guess what? You're going to make it. Yeah.

Dude, one of the last meals I had prehab, I ordered a, what is the Bell, Nachos Bel Grande? I ordered a Nachos Bel Grande that was like $22. Just like every box? I just wanted, I put like extra meat, extra cheese, extra beans. You made the chips Doritos. Yeah, I think, no, I didn't, but I have done that.

It was like 1896 for one. Speaking of Taco Bell. Yeah? Oh, yeah. We have Crunchwrap sliders. Wow. Dan. Yeah. Love the Crunchwrap. For the Crunchwrap lover on the go. But I've always said, what if it was smaller? What if I ate 11 of them? Yeah, what if I had three of these and they were tinier? So they're, I'm sorry,

not, there's no burger aspect to them. No, they just put the chicken or the quesadilla. Have you had a Crunchwrap? I've never had a crunch wrap. Oh okay yeah they fold it all together and it's like a big round thing. But now they just take a little tortilla side. So they're just pop the whole thing. Steak and queso crunch wrap sliders. Okay. So you get the fajita steak with your small tortilla. Yeah or, or the chicken. I can't get the black bean Crunchwrap slider. Hey, that's why you get the app. That's weird use of the slider term.

Yeah, it's a little bit of a mass civilization. Yeah, just call it a mini Crunchwrap Supreme. Exactly. Yeah. Okay. What else? Okay. Big one for Jake. What else? This is another Jake was right.

Jimmy John's toasted sandwich. It makes no sense, folks. The idea that Jimmy John's, what are you holding out for? I mean, if you think about how this happened, and there is actually a really interesting story about what happened to Quiznos, business-wise. Like the guy who founded it,

I don't know, somehow got real horny for franchising and screwed a bunch of people over. This is why there's no quid pro. I thought he got too horny for olives. No. Isn't that the place with olives? No, you still confuse Quiznos with Schlotzkis. Oh, damn it.

Every time I tell him, and I don't know why, the weirdest part of this is that I have three things in my memory bank of me telling Dan I was going to Schlotzky's because I recall that all three times he was like, gonna get some olives. Too many olives? I'm like, I just don't get the olives.

The wall was lined with giant cans of olives. Like who wants to like just promote that we're the place for olives? Cause there's, the olive bar is a hot thing too now. Central market, 200,000 olives. Oh yeah, what's that about walk right by? No, I don't even know what an olive is. They're disgusting. I hate what is it? And and if like even one is on one piece of your pizza the whole pizza and filtrated

Yeah, exactly. The juice just immediately spreads over every inch of the thing. Is it a pickle? Is it in the pickle family? I don't know. It's like round I know I've had it's like round. I know I've had an olive with a martini, but I don't really know what its utility is. A little olive juice in a martini can be nice, but biting into a fucking olive is a nightmare. Isn't there usually a pit? So that would help classify it into a nut? Well, yeah, there's green olives, there's black olives.

Is it a nut? Yeah, you can get stuff, a pimento. Anyways, Quiznos did not have olives, but they had toasting. And if you see what happened, very quickly, everyone else just said, well, why don't we just toast our sandwiches? If this is the one market delineator that this restaurant has, why don't we run the spread? I was kind of with Jimmy John's, just sticking, you know, let's just do our bit.

Just have it as an option. Yeah, but their bit is to be fast. Yeah. You got to sit there and toast it. Freaky fast. Well, now you know that you added toasted. Yeah, I don't. I'm not for toasting things. Why?

Why do we got to toast everything? Because it makes it better. A toasted sandwich is the best. Why not throw a piece of bacon on it, too? It's so much better. That's the dumbest thing you've ever said. Next time you get pot belly, tell them don't toast it. No, because the bacon is a, you have a fair point of like,

oh, bacon tastes good on its own. And it's actually making the dish unhealthy. But with toasting, it's just heat. Crunch, adding a nice crunch. And the cheese melts and the sauce is hot. I can't tell you that I've gone to a store and been like, hey, I'd like my sandwich as cold as possible since they started toasting.

But they do have to add toasters to tens of thousands of that's right I think of the expense that that is a massive decision that they made Yeah, and they're gonna start charging more now per sandwich just to say yeah, and but like extremes realize yet Yeah, I'm so economy I'm glad that the owners and the stockholders have someone out there to look out for the bottom line like Dan M and Mike s there was a day when they sat there and they're like today's the day we're deciding Yeah, it's a big room a hundred percent in toaster no toaster toaster no toaster Oh, we're gonna have and this argument was occurring. Yes We're over toasting things. Don't we want to set ourselves apart? Yeah, then one guy got up at this guy going

It's just heat. Yeah, no, well one guy's like, look, he just handed people actually two pieces of cheese. One was kind of melty, one was not. Yeah, eat, eat both. And he's like, huh, I don't know. You tell me, which one of those do you want to eat again? You like that crunch?

And the no toast guys couldn't even lie. They were like, he is right about that. And a bunch of untoasted bread and cheese just sat on the table as they finished the delicious toasted cheese and they said, fuck yes. The time is now. Put them in every damn store. Be on the right side of history.

Gotta be on the right side of history. Two more quick ones. Domino's debutes, what? Debutes, whatever, that's a word. New Parmesan stuffed crust pizza. Saw this on the app last night, was extremely intrigued. Was extremely intrigued. What does that mean, Parmesan?

Oh, stuffed crust, normal, mozzarella stuffed crust, Parmesan on the outside. So when you're scrolling through your phone, like I'm playing words with friends, you're hitting the Domino's app, let's just see what they got going. What deals? And I told you also, I save emails from food places.

I have a coupon folder in my email. So just when I want food, whatever. So I saw the Parmesan crust. Parmesan crust is already very good. I feel like stuffed crust definitely peaked and crested in like 1998. Like the, the, the stuff crust peaked with like MLB expansion of like, like when I think of stuff crust, I think of the Marlins and the Diamondbacks.

Stuff crust certainly feels like idiocracy, but but why not at the same time? It's really, The crust is there. What if we could just add another thousand calories to this pizza? But it'll also go farther. You're gonna eat less. You'll be fuller, for sure.

I don't know. See, if the cheese was not heated up and the stuff crust, Dan would like it. Right, yeah, what if they just stuff a cold cheese stick into the crust? Yeah, like the string cheese. string cheese yeah yeah we should do unbaked pizzas there you go the other way from Jimmy John's and then think of all the money will save on of it we take ovens out of every store then finally

for our call it our green initiative yeah yeah microplastics the fist sandwiches are back for lint that's the only way I know that Jesus is about to die and be alive. Wendy's is offering a crispy panko fish sandwich. Burger King has a buy one get one for two. And most importantly, the most slept on fish, the Wadacatch basket. Is it nice?

You gotta grove. The basket? Yeah, the Wadacatch basket with the it nice? You gotta grope. The basket? Yeah. The Wadacatch basket with the spicy ketchup, which I know you love. I do. Is so good. I honestly don't think I've ever had a fish sandwich

from a fast food restaurant. I was about to say the exact same sentence. I don't think I ever have. I've had fish, what I suppose would be fish tender type things at LJS's growing up. That was a big player in my life. But no sandwich. I know Dan plays in that league. Oh yeah, no. I've got my McDonald's fish sandwich theory.

The fish sandwich looks wonderful at McDonald's. And if you look at the picture of it, the tartar sauce perfectly aligned around. About sogged out. Cheese is right, yeah, it's fluffy bun. Is the cheese weird? Huh? Is the cheese weird? No, the cheese is like, so the fish sandwich is square,

but then the cheese, you will put it like a diamond over it, and then it's a little melty on each, the little corn right. It looks so beautiful. And then I would order one. It would happen annually. And every year. So I would order one.

And yes, it's like two, like it's kind of hard. The fish or like at least one fourth of it is really hard and overcooked and something. And then there's a glop of the tartar sauce, but it's just over on this side. So it's not spread over the whole sandwich and like the cheese is not melted partly. And the bun is like stale, like, and you're like,

oh, that's nothing like I anticipated. And then you slog your way through finishing this fish sandwich, because I bought it. And then I, every time you go to McDonald's for another 11 months and 29 days, you're like, ah, I know I don't. Then you kind of like- That itch comes back.

Yeah, you're there and you're like, man, that looks really good. Maybe I got a bad batch. I think I'm gonna order that, yeah, I'm gonna order the fish sandwich. That was a different restaurant location. Different employee. And then it's always- He had no passion.

Same thing. This guy looks legit. So that's my fish sandwich theory. It's just, you forget. And there are things in life that happen. I understand that theory. I don't have that for that particular sandwich. But Jake's right.

What other walk of life do you ever put cheese on a fish? That's what I'm saying. From the beginning, it's always been weird to me. Even like, if you went to a sushi restaurant and they were like this one is You know crab and salmon and tuna and cheddar Mm-hmm. If you like that, well, that's weird. I don't you don't you just don't see it often So that was always confusing to me when I'd see that on the promo. Hey speaking of cheese Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Have you guys seen the bit? Thank you, Clayton. Great job, Clayton. Oh yeah, thanks, Clayton. What's the bit? That dude's good. Clayton, new bit.

Twiff, this week in fast food. Get it sponsored. Who are you yelling at? I don't know. You yelled, get it sponsored, like who, to who? Who's? What was I just talking about? Oh, cheese.

Yeah. Yeah. Have you heard about the bit? No. I would think people have sent this to you as much as. It's possible. Aren't people throwing slices of cheese on cyber trucks? On Teslas, yeah.

Oh, Teslas? Really? In general? Yeah, like this is a new bit. This is a TikTok bit. That makes me happy. I've seen it pop up on just random cars on TikTok over the last couple of years.

I think we've talked about that a little bit. I should point out to you that when I first did that, I had no frame of reference for this being an idea that was available to me. You know what I mean? I didn't see that anywhere. It was me and Binion, actually. No, I'm saying, I'm crediting you with being a pioneer. I know, I'm just trying to think of,

we would, you know, it's hot in summer, and we would just get stacks and stacks of Velveeta slices. And you know, we lived in a town where your main roads were usually two lanes one way, two lanes the other, we would just get stacks and stacks of Velveeta slices. And you know, we lived in a town where your main roads were usually two lanes one way, two lanes the other, so you're just in the left-hand lane going one way. Any cars in the left-hand lane coming your direction, you could just soft lob almost like a shovel pass, just a slice of cheese into their windshield.

And you could quickly through the back window see them hitting their, when it would just smear keys. Yeah, you know, it's 110 degrees out. We would do that. Sometimes you could even do like the stealth thing of if a car was parked, you could put it right underneath their windshield wiper

and they would just get in the car and not see it. And then maybe see like, what is that? And just kind of hit it. It's reactively. Trying to dislodge it. Yeah, and it'll just smear all over there. It's fun. Is it cake on there and stay forever?

It's not easy to get off. It's not like paint. It's not gonna damage it, but it definitely takes a little elbow grease. You're not just getting like a water hose. Cause it's that nasty chemical that's in there. Doesn't cheese make a TikTok appearance every couple years? Doesn't like cheese on your cat's head?

It feels like it, yeah. A couple years ago. Throw it at a baby, yeah. Throw it at a baby. Oh, the baby's head. Yeah. Yeah. And then they, blah.

Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. That's good stuff. That's good clean fun. That's today in cheese. Do you want me to get my Cybertruck review? Yeah, let's good stuff. That's good clean fun. That's today in cheese. Do you want me to get my a cyber truck review?

Yeah, let's do it. I drove in a cyber truck the other day. Jake left. He did not want to be a part of this. Is it Elon related or you had to go pick up a kid? It really was that I needed to get out of here. But even if I didn't have to go pick up a kid, the reason I wouldn't have done it is not because Elon,

I just didn't have any desire to spend half an hour finding out. Oh, look at it. A gold one too? Yeah. Come on, you'd have gotten a gold one. So yeah, one of our buddies, good listener James, James Crowley. He had trouble with the door. So. Has a cyber trap.

Lucky man. So. And yes. Open sesame. I have talked to some people who will initially say to me, boo! Like they're just they get politically charged up about the cyber truck and I think they look horrible. They really do. And I can't understand the allure at all. It's status. And then I got in the Cybertruck. Yeah. Mm-hmm. And I have to tell you, it is incredible.

Yeah? It is like being in a spaceship or the future or it's just what everything can be. More so even than other like Teslas you've been in? Cause you've been in other Teslas. Yes, maybe the fact this one is newer than the ones I've been in the past. Teslas are very cool, but the Cybertruck,

it feels like you're... The Tesla still feels like a car. The Cybertruck felt like a, just a whole experience. Like, I don't know, did you feel this? Yeah, I mean, it's unlike anything you've ever ridden in or driven in. It was a whole experience. I don't know, did you feel this? Yeah, I mean it's unlike anything you've ever ridden in or driven in. It was a different world. Yeah, the technology's insane.

Yeah, from the way the air conditioner works to the, there's a picture of Sean Rab walking over to. Oh, zoom in! Go to the dumpster. Why is Sean Rab always at the dumpster? Sean Rab is over there making phone calls. Dude scoops. All the time, he's awesome.

Ooh, what is that, was that the AC? Yeah, you can control the airflow. Is it easier or super confusing, like intimidating? At first it's very intimidating, but actually, yes, it's very easy. I mean, it's kind of like, do you remember the day when everybody didn't have a Mac and maybe you don't have a Mac?

But switching over to the Mac, there's like, oh, the X is on the other side. And then like, there was just, it seemed overwhelming. And then once you do get in it and start using it, you're like, this is way better. Everything about this is better. Yes. And then this thing, the self-driving was incredible. Incredible. Did it around downtown Dallas. You just press self-driving? Driving itself, yes. And you're doing nothing. No feet, no hands. Correct. Damn.

Like I've never done that. I still can't have our time. You can take back control anytime. You just start doing this and you're now in control of the steering wheel. So you can fix, you put your address in, press the button, do nothing. Yeah, it's coming up in the video. And it reads cars coming from the left and the right and if there's parked cars and somebody getting out of a parked car, it'll- See, there's autopilot. It's really, really incredible.

I can't say enough about it. This guy here, so he actually bought this for himself, James Crowley, and then had heard, hey, I hear some people rent these out sometimes. So he put it on, what's your app? Turo. Yeah. Okay, yeah. Me and a-

Yep. A billion other people, whatever, but the one you've- And also terrorists. Yeah, bad people. Oh really? Yeah That checks out right? Jake's on the dark web Anyway, so he rents this out on Turo and he says Like so many people want to rent it Maybe it's just somebody wants to rent it for the weekend

because they're thinking of buying a Cybertruck and the dealership won't give you one of those to drive around. Yeah. Or just want to rent it for the weekend, just for fun or just whatever. He says he rents it out so much now, he had to buy another one.

I bet. Damn, the YouTube looks sweet. Just pull up anything. And people love it. Oh, look, they love it. Yes, yes. People like you? Yes, it's like you are.

Oh shit, that's Fortnite. Oh, she hit the Fortnite thing. It's like you are in a. Most fun. Just a random lady in downtown. It's like you're in a, you know, the truckers people do the. People are waving at you all the time.

It's, and he does say it's politically charged a little bit. Some people will, will, um, drive real fast to get up next to him and give him the finger on the highway, or they'll drive real fast to get up next to him and give him a big thumbs up. And he thinks those are both politically motivated. Yeah, I'd say, um, But it also, so anywhere you park, it's basically a ring doorbell on wheels in the sense of it has cameras all over it.

You can't see them, but it's always able to record. And so now if you walk up to it in a parking lot and kind of start looking at it like, oh man, look at this thing. And you're standing there. It starts recording like a ring doorbell, like it it automatically starts recording whoever's around you. So if somebody does some damage to your car, you have that.

If somebody if something happens in this parking lot. You're and the motion detector hits, it will have recorded that. It's wild. That's wild. That's incredible. It is, it was really, I can't say enough and I didn't wanna like it. I thought I would hate this thing, it's boxy, it's so comfortable, it was like the best thing.

That's a perfect description because I think it's ugly as fuck, but I've wanted to go inside one, I hear the inside's amazing and all that tech sounds so, so if it auto, does it park itself when you auto drive? It can, yeah, it'll parallel park. It'll find the right spot. Yeah.

That's, I just don't understand it, it's so sweet. Oh no, I don't understand it. And you can summon it, like if you're at a store or whatever and you're ready to go, it'll come get you. Shut up. What? Okay. He's got a QR code on the back so you can rent it.

If you own this and wanted me to do your show, you could say, no, I'm sending a ride. I don't know. I think it's got to be piloted a little bit. Because there were times where Dane would have to give it a nudge. Like at a stop sign or something, he could hit the gas just a little bit and then it would take off and go. Well, that's because I chose to. It'll just do what I'm doing.

Yeah, it'll do that, yeah. But I think it needs somebody present, yeah. For now. And that's probably a legal concern more than anything. But yes, can you, this is back to Jake. Oh, there she is, hit her. Jake, what? Talked about this years ago,

that you don't think your daughter will ever even drive a car. That's the goal. My goal is that she, you know. I don't know if it'll be that quick. Perhaps has to know how, but by then it's just kind of. I don't know about your daughter, we had that conversation plenty.

It won't be one, maybe two generations where they will say, wait, you had to use your feet. What are you, Fred Flintstone? Yeah, what were you using your feet for? And your little hands? What were you doing in there? And as far as, I think some of the other vehicles of the past that you would say,

what is the kind of fuel? Diesel fuel, you know, it takes a real long time to speed up and all that. Like this thing, it is faster than a regular vehicle. Did you gun it while driving? When you were head control, you gunned it pretty good? Oh yeah. Cause I always hear that.

It's damn. Zero to 60 is like. Yeah, of course I did. Grand National. We didn't take it on the highway or anything, but. Oh, it's so fun. Yeah. So yeah, thumbs up for that.

Well, we'll put a link in the show. I mean, you see like. Show notes to, if you want to rent James's. The gold cyber truck. You see people who are like truck guys say that it sucks. I mean you see like show notes to if you want to rent James's the gold Cybertruck you see people who are like truck guys say that it sucks like they'll do videos and it's being torn apart and falling apart And they're like this thing doesn't actually hold up But I never saw them I Never saw them commenting on the fact that you can get

Random dialysis nurses in downtown Dallas to throw ass for you. Yeah, straight in a circle. That's kind of a different feature. Seems worth it. Your truck with the Punisher sticker never elicited that ass. We could talk wife swap. We could talk some sports. We could do some... Okay. From the wonderful world of sports, radio sports, scoreboard.

Oh yeah, I like that. Well, why don't we work Celebrity Wife Swap into sports just because, you know, Heinz Ward was on it. That's right. It's brought to you by Community Mechanical, communitydfw.com. It's 469-667-7290, working with Travis. I actually talked to Travis yesterday. Good deal.

But that's not just because we know him and stuff. He will get back to you right away. I've heard from a number of listeners who have that same experience. Communitydfw.com, they're here to help you with your HVAC situation. They're here to help you with, for me, it is getting what is called a mini split.

It's the ability for me to have heating and air in our little garage area. But it can do all sorts of things. The Jake office? Yes. Okay. And if you do get a new HVAC system through community, they'll get you a 690 sit-in. I just booked our first one.

Hell yes. Oh really? Mm-hmm. Sales estimate, they come out and give you that, get you a free DZ knit cap,, if they come out and give you that, get your free DZ Knit cap. And if you sign up for preventative maintenance, they'll get you DZ Merch of your choice, up to $50. So check them out at communitydfw.com,

469-667-7290. These dudes know what they're doing. They'll help you out though. They kept us from dying at Dan's house. That was important. Yeah, they did some preventative maintenance and they saw the exhaust duct was disconnected. Just straight from the car up to the den?

No, it was up in the attic and it was just dumping carbon moni into the attic apparently and it was kind of dissipating out through the room but still they're like yeah if this was happening long term here that'd be a really bad bit. So don't die. Yeah. Go to communitydfw.com. But how often have you you know just had your unit checked you just don't do think of doing that so you should do it. I'm gonna go to communitydfw.com today. You should. You should. Gonna. Ask for Travis. I wrote a quick OSA article this morning.

Okay. And Zach Martin retired. I've not listened to the press conference yet though. Have you guys? No. No. I did not. He's the one they they drafted instead of Johnny Menzel, correct? Yeah and I did see that clip where you know, Stephen's up there Jerry's up there and he's like man I never got kicked so hard in my life. Then when Stephen made me draft this Idiot big win for Stephen there. Oh, yeah Yeah, that's a Hall of Fame player. I know that Jerry talked a little first ballot Dude, yeah. Yes. I think he might be first ballot only because of some of the weird, you know, numbers that

jump out. You've had more Pro Bowls than holding calls. Things like that. Great fun stat. Yeah, I had a couple of them in here. We're all pros. I couldn't believe they let me get away with this one from when he did retire. You've seen the insane statistics,

nine all-pro designations, seven first team, eight false starts, seven accepted holding penalties. He had fewer holding penalties in pass protection, zero. Zero! Never had a hold on a pass. Wow. All seven were running. He had fewer holding penalties in pass protection, zero,

during his career than Jones had public paternity disputes. One. I kind of forgot that. I kind of forgot that made it. But yeah, the whole Jerry talked afterward. And not Pro Bowls, right? All Pro.

Dude, he's on the all decade team. Yeah, Pro Bowls, like lots of people can make the Pro Bowl. You want to talk about line stats real quick and in JV football, I fall started the all decade team. Yeah, Pro Bowls, like lots of people can make the Pro Bowl. You want to talk about line stats real quick? In JV football, I false started on three straight plays. No. Yeah. I was ready to get after that ass. That's a...

Three straight. Wait, so you were on offense? Yeah. False start, okay, yeah. Micah was across the line. You're always trying to get that extra second. Crazy. False starting does not indicate getting after that ass.

Oh yeah. You are confused. I was firing off the ball. False starting means you're terrified. I was firing off the ball. I'm gonna try to beat you to this because I don't think I can beat you. So Steven and Jerry talked, maybe we'll do that tomorrow.

But the Yosa deal is nice. It's a fourth round pick, or excuse me, third round pick that I started messing around with, you know the website Over the Cap? Mm-hmm. They have a tool that's kind of like what they use in baseball. You know where you can look at like wins per war,

or a million per war, that whole bit? Like a guy's three war, what'd you pay him? Did you get your value? Yeah. They use some pro football focused data to do something like that, and see like, okay, how much of this player actually creating value. And the Cowboys paid Osa $5 million

for the first four years of his time in the NFL, five total. And I think his value was something like 50 million, 40 or 50 million. Wow, so what must the value of somebody like Dak be? If he can land a quarterback. Every year, I would actually just kind of have to throw Dak out because the first four years Dak was drafted, every year, every service or website

did these studies, his would fuck everything up. Because it just made no sense. As far as the average value? You can't, I mean you're paying a guy 500 grand and he's producing like 35 million dollars in value a year by being a top 10 starting quarterback. It would throw the whole data set off. But in this case, you know, OSA was a huge value.

Now, you're paying him 20 million a year. There's a guy who made $5 million in four years and they just gave him $50 million in a signing bonus two days ago. And his mom was there. And earned, absolutely earned. His mom was there with him and I watched a couple interviews with him,

one with Kay Adams, one with McAfee and he's like, he's talking about how great it was to have his mom there and like he sat down with her afterward and just said, hey, like this part of it's over. Now I'm just playing for championships and legacies, but you're good. You're good. Cool that he didn't have to go somewhere else to get it. Didn't have to go somewhere else.

We didn't hear a bunch of talk about it. That really does usually happen with your interior defensive lineman, especially here. Yeah, I think the Cowboys are maybe getting up to speed a little bit. Chris Jones makes 30 million a year. Well, they're getting up to speed or just behind the trend. They paid him what everybody thought he was gonna get,

which is about 20 million a year. They were gonna franchise him if they didn't. That was gonna be 25, so they're still. Did you see, speaking of that, I think Interior D-line passed defensive end on the franchise price. Like the average of the top five DLs is more than the edge rushers now.

Really? Yeah, I'm pretty sure I heard that. That's crazy. Which it was like, whoa, because it's pretty standard, those positions, and what you get money for. But D-line is being so properly valued now, interior D-line, that I think that number's higher

than for defensive ends. That's crazy. Yeah. The Chris Jones one definitely does. I mean, he makes like 31 million a year. But Osa at 20, he's still only the 15th highest paid defensive tackle. So usually you sign a guy and it's like, well, he'sth highest paid defensive tackle.

So, you know, usually you sign a guy and it's like, well, he's the highest paid right now, but that's just how it is. In a couple years, it'll be a good deal. He's already just paid average. So, it's tough to argue with. Is there not concern that, like, he had a career year, that he had a contract year?

It's possible, but, you know, he had, I don't know what that, I guess, but he had an insane amount of production the year before too for his snaps, and he plays with Micah. Micah's gonna get double and triple teamed a lot. And having a guy inside that can make a play is very, very helpful.

And it works both ways. This also keeps Micah happy, right? Yeah. And it makes it easier for Micah to make plays. If that's something we still wanna do in this sports town. Yeah, it was kinda my thing this morning, is just writing, hey, this is just good news. It's a good deal for the players, mom's happy.

It's a good deal for the team. I didn't hear, oh, and I just- Got it done before drafting free agency? Got it done real early, no talk about how he was out of shape or greedy or the pie, like the Jones liked to bring up. And I did think it was funny listening to Osa that Brian Schottenheimer sent a really nice bottle of champagne to his celebration dinner with his family.

Because I was under the impression that if an athlete consumes alcohol they're not to be congratulated or celebrated but embarrassed and excoriated and traded. Was he like... I don't know who that was. Brian who? Yeah does he have any idea who? Oh there was one there was one part of the K Adams interview that was kind of funny. He didn't realize Mike McCarthy wasn't coaching this year. He's like, what, really? I wasn't coaching anywhere? Yeah.

He was aware he was not. He was aware he had been fired. Or not re-signed. Not re-signed. Or whatever. Yeah, as far as greedy and the pie, it does feel like, unless it's a top tier, top of the market guy, they generally get these done.

It's a big deal though. But they got, remember they got Tyron Smith done pretty easily. Although he was somewhere near, more near the top of the market, I would say, at least as a player. Yeah, better. The, who's the linebacker with at least as a player. Yeah better. Who's the linebacker with the sunglasses? Jaylen. Yeah they they seem to somehow get some of these done but then when it comes to the defensive end, when it comes to

quarterback, when it comes to a running back like yeah we'll see or even wide receiver right? CD they didn't get done early. Obviously. He wasn't even in camp. Made sure to take care of Gallup off that ACL though. Right, that's the thing. Yeah, I don't know. I just I can feel myself having to have hope for the Cowboys that I was not planning on. Because I mean, you know, who knows? Tyler Mailey? We have options this spring, but I'm already pretty horny

for Cowboys football right now. Again, the basketball story we're not talking about did take our mind off of Brian Schottenheimer. We were pretty hot and heavy about how ridiculous this was when it happened. And I feel terrible about that because I was reacting like everyone else else and now that I've gotten, had the time to get to know Shottie

and hear about the Shottie way and how he builds a program, I don't, you know. You haven't heard anything is what you're saying. So who is the new, like Jacksonville just hired a new offensive coordinator. Did they? And he's like 29. He worked for Liam.

Grant Udinski. And you've never heard of him. That would have made me feel better. That would have made me feel like, you know what? Wow, they did some real homework here. They dug deep. They found somebody. They found the next young, bright mind. It's probably being young is a big part of it, correct? That you just want to

make a very good one. Well, see, that's the thing with Schottenheimer is like... It offers hope. It's the same of everything. You typically want either cool haircut or skins on the wall. Brian Schottenheimer coming up pretty short on both. You know what I mean? McCarthy, you're like, oh fuck, he's not young, but he won a Super Bowl, he's been around the block. What about knew a coach who didn't ever win a Super Bowl, but knew him really well,

who was on the competition committee, and it was his dad. It was his dad, okay. That's something. It is something. So you wanna keep going with wife swap and sports right now? Yeah, sure.

Crazy old son of a B. How did this come up? What are you guys doing? Wife swap? Vern Troyer's wife was on Today in History, right? Right, it was her birthday two days ago, I believe. Which wife? Was it this one?

Vern Troyer's girlfriend. But it wasn't this lady, though. Yeah, it was. It was? Yeah. Okay. So celebrity wife swap. Yeah, Brittany Powell.

Which I have never seen in my life before. I've seen Wife Swap for sure. And then what was King Curtis' show? That was Wife Swap. It was? One of the first season, yeah. Team Having Fun? Yeah.

Well, Wife Swap, of course, yes, Wife Swap was what Dave Chappelle based his bid on, correct? Yeah. Where he swapped with a white family, which is a great bid. Yeah, but I've seen several episodes of regular wife swap. Okay, so I just learned about regular wife swap. I thought-

There's a lot there. Yeah, so it turns out that, so this is in 2004, they stole this show from the Brits, as we will do. And they put it on, and it's all fun and everything. But then in 2005, they got sued by one of the participants because, so the wife swap bit is, they say that you don't know who you're going to get. You just sign a piece of paper that says, I'm on wife swap or I'm on celebrity wife swap.

Like Verne Troyer and Heinz Ward, each knew the wife is going away for a week or two or whatever, but they don't know who's going to be joining them. And the wife that shows up, she doesn't know where she's going. So Heinz Ward's wife, used to this lavish, she lives in a mansion, everything's perfect. And then she's driving into this neighborhood and there's like barbed wire fences and there's like checks cash.

Yeah, she's like, what, where am I going here? That's where Vern Troyer lived And then they just let you walk around the house for a little while and you kind of figure it out Uh-huh. We've got that so are you see Vern Troyer sitting there? Yeah, this was this was pretty funny to me Okay, play number two Clayton Because it's pretty evident when you walk into Heinz Ward's house, he's got Super Bowl trophies. Here you go. Wow, football. Super Bowl champions?

I know that face. I'm dancing with the stars. Am I in Heinz Ward's house? So it's all of his accomplishments. Yeah. Oh, yes. Now she's gonna go into Vern's little mini-me. Look at that.

Little small chairs. Oh my God, it's mini-me. I'm at Vern Troyer's house. Little picture of him, yeah, and then this. Like a little wild child. I don't know what I'm getting myself into. His room, mini-me's man cave is like literally the extra bedroom in your house, the small room.

It's the only room that he has fitted to small guy stuff too. And there's, yes, there's little tiny chairs. Really? Yeah. The lights are all low. You see it a couple of tiny jerseys. Yes, the tables are all low.

Jerseys. That was funny. Yes, the light switches are low because anywhere else in his house, he has to use a stick to turn on a light. He had everything else built normal. Okay, but he had his room. Or purchased it normal,

but had that one retrofitted. I think the house was just the house. Right, that's what I'm saying. And then yes, he fixed up the tiny room. But to him, he's got a life-size mini-me in there. That was pretty weird to me. Why not? Yeah.

No matter how famous any of us get, I don't picture a six-foot Dan McDowell in the room. Did you want him to get a little small life-size thing of something from one of his other roles? No, I just am not, I don't think of myself highly enough. You mean the one where he was a romantic lead in Meg Ryan co-starred. Right.

Make us on the beach at the end. I was thinking of the one in the series where he was trying to track down Jason Bourne. Oh yeah, he was getting exacting revenge. I think they were in Italy. His daughter was kidnapped. No, so I only mentioned that. Never get away from me, Bourne. I was just saying, so the history of this show,

the reason ABC got sued was because in 2005, they had a dude on regular wife swap that a gay man showed up. Oh And so it turns out his left and they brought him some He's gonna get am I gonna get a hot am I gonna get you know, maybe something happen And it's a dude Hey, hey So anyway, that was back in 2004 and five. When did the other wife swap start?

Celebrity started in, this episode was 2015, I wanna say. I think 12. 2012 is when, okay. Yeah, when? Yeah, you're right. So second season ran 2013. Oh, okay, cause this isn't the second season. I'm sorry.

Yeah, no, it's season four. Yeah, 2015 was season four. You're right. The first episode was Tracy Gold and Carney Wilson. So dude, rolling through the, this is a mashup of, like it's awesome to look at the names they put together. It's so good, and it really just speaks

to a moment in time. And because I think it's important to note this, I don't know how this is gonna work with the generation of famous people right now, because it's too fractured and fragmented. Like I've been making the case for a long time that when people started, oh this is the worst year for celebrity deaths,

it just keeps getting worse. All these celebrity deaths. But in reality it's just that we're reaching the end of the lives of the first time we had more than like five famous people. We used to only have like five or 10 of them, and then over time, the 40s, 50s, 60s, and went on, we have tons of famous people.

So now you're- Soon everybody who dies will have been famous. In some sense- Well, Jake made that point years ago. Open my eyes, he's right. There's only so many famous people, but now every day someone dies. Gary Busey, Ted Haggard, flavor Flav. Okay. So Ted Haggard, yes. Ted Haggard, I didn't know who he

was. Grizzly Adams, right? No. He is a Methodist pastor, the founder of the New Life Church in Colorado Springs. IJB is going to be so mad at me for whiffing on this. I watched- Ted Haggardy, or somebody Haggerty, anyway- Ted Haggerty I know quite well. So a Methodist pastor, they swap him with Gary Busey, which is awesome. Excellent. It's important to note that Ted Haggerty was a Methodist pastor who was caught up in a male prostitution masseuse ring with crystal meth. And I think when they busted him, they had set up

strobe lights in a hotel, which was always a phenomenally gay with crystal meth. And I think when they busted him, they had set up strobe lights in a hotel, which was always a phenomenally gay note to me. So might you think, man, here's a guy that he's going to disappear from the public eye. No. Shamed public, like he's a pastor, he was shamed publicly, no, yeah. They call him up and say, all right, here's 500 grand,

I don't know what they might pay you. We're gonna do a wife swap. We're not gonna tell you who. And it turns out to be, yes, his wife has to go live with Gary Busey for two weeks. I wanna now watch some of these, but because they're very good at the... Mix and match.

Yeah, mix and match and Kate Goslin from whatever and Kate in eight, remember? She had eight kids. And Kendra Wilkinson. Playboy. Who was Hugh Hefner's girlfriend and then married to a- Hank Baskett. Oh, okay, yeah.

She walked on him with a transvestite or a transsexual. I can't remember the specifics. Let's see. No credit there? It's on the list. Okay. You got a little Bristol Palin for you there Jake? Oh sure. Holly Robinson-Pete and Margaret Cho. That's a very funny one. That's match made Nevin. So yeah. Oh look, DJ Paul. Swapped with Plaxico Burris. Okay. We're going to have to ask computer about that. And yes, then season four, Verne Troyer and Heinz Ward.

For some reason. It looks like the last episode ever was Robert Carradine. Who's that? What's he do? His brother was Kung Fu. Yeah. He's David Carradine's brother. I don't know who he was in a bunch of stuff.

And T.O., Terrell Owens, was on the last episode. Was Verne Turan before he was up for to be the new James Bond? I think it was right around that time. I think that's probably why they had him on. Yeah. I don't know if they- He went with Daniel Craig!

I don't know if they did it for this reason, but some of these people are like, they're opposites. So the world's just not ready for it. Some of them are just famous names and you threw them together. But they are kind of opposites in that Heinz Ward is like a neat freak. I guess you would call him an autistic guy.

I mean, there can be OCD without autism. Okay, well he's- He'sCD without autism. Okay, well his- He's a very clean, structured, neat, organized guy. Yes, his house is a mansion yet it is immaculate. There's not a spot and it's because he, his wife and kid clean it every day, they have a list of chores and they check them off. The kid does his homework at a certain time,

they eat at a certain time, They eat at a certain time. I love his life. Me too. Whereas apparently, MiniMe's life is- Less hall of fame structure. Is basically, it seems like playing video games. He has a mountain- Ordering Chinese-

He has a Mountain Dew Fountain Suspenser in his living room. Yes, it's like many me said, if I ever get famous, what's the one thing I want to make sure I have? Yeah. Is a yes. He's got that and he's got a ton of video. You might think that now.

Have you thought that as a kid? Like I remember maybe not this one as a kid, but remember the Fuddruckers thing with you can get all the things in the one spurt? Sure. Press the button. That's the one they have in the movies now. That's the one that kids always want in their living room if they grow up. Add a little vanilla. I don't like that whole customization bit. No. I don't like it. I don't like that the orange comes out of the same thing

as the cola, as the lemonade, as like, I'm like, you sure there's not gonna be one drop? No, yeah, but you have to do a little pre, little pre-spurt. Yeah, of course. You just add the water and then spritz, spritz, spritz. Yeah, how much are we wasting over the years doing that? I don't care.

Again, bottom line, damn. I'm worried about the Fuddruckers staying in business. Jesus. Slurpee machine was the dream, the in-home dream for my era. Yeah. Like, imagine. I wanted a jugs machine. Just catch balls.

Crushed ice machine. I have those now, right? You can get the fancy-ass crushed ice machine. I have those now, right? You can get the fancy ass crushed ice. Let's see, what else do I like out of this? Who has it? She has a, so Vern Troyer's, do you wanna take over? Yeah, sure.

So, the first thing that sticks out is just Hines Ward, former NFL wide receiver, Super Bowl MVP, Dancing with the Stars champion, go figure, he's got a hot wife. Younger, wider. Yeah. New. Fitnessy.

Yeah, new wife. New wife. She's got stepson. And Dan picked this up, I didn't catch this, but he just thought the stepson acted, or just took advantage of a situation. Watch this little video. Okay, play number one Clayton.

It's the morning of the swap and Brittany and Lindsay are preparing to leave home for a week. I wish you luck. Thank you, I'm gonna need it. So he's in the bedroom when she's packing. Brittany's very white trash. You guys didn't miss me?

Yeah. Then he goes in for the hug. I respect my lifestyle. I respect yours. Dan thought... or you take it over. Go ahead. So watch the hug again if we can play that. This is the stepson. He's about the age of me when my dad remarried, a hot with big boobs. And now watch what's gonna happen here is he's gonna really lean into those boobs and I'm gonna tell you what. Oh yeah, right? Every time I got even the brush of side boob,

this guy's putting his face in there. And he is remembering that and this is not a bad beat for that kid that night, it's a good one. Okay, wow. He's fired up. This is experience only you can speak to. And she, they had not even, they weren't even married yet. I think they were engaged or something at this point. But she knows it too.

Look at her, look at the hand position. She's just like getting. Get on in there. But he knows the cameras are watching. He can kind of do anything here. Yeah. Yeah, he might even had to do, he might've been like,

oh, I don't know, can we do one more take? I don't like the light, let's try it again. Yeah. Do you think your dad knew you were banking bosom rubs with his new lady? There's no way, right? I don't think you think of that unless you have, again, he didn't think of this.

I had the experience to draw upon. I don't know if Chappy ever had a girlfriend over that you got a hug on. Yeah, my stepmom, But I explicitly remember being like, I want to avoid that area. Oh, OK. Where the man's like, mm. Well, no, it's right in.

If your new mom is double endowed as your old mom, then you're going to notice that. Which I suppose is often the case. And look, so many movies that we've seen will indicate that that's the stepmom is a thing. So okay. So then the hot mom goes to Vern Troyer's house and Vern has got a teenaged stepson.

It's not a stepson, but it's... Just, oh, just... His girlfriend has like a 14 or 15 year old son. But Vern is very clear. Well had they been married, it'd be steps to make. Right, right, but I'm just saying Vern's pretty clear that he's not like a parent. He's not telling the kid what to do.

He's not like Hines Ward's wife, where she's actually trying to raise Jayden Ward and help out. Well the mom is barely a parent. Yeah. So. What did she say? He's free range.

Free range kid. Free range kid, which is funny Anyway, hottie gets over there and the 14 year old just can't help him So this is what jumped out to me he admits, you know, it tells the people yeah She's pretty hot but then watch him in this clip. Like he never he never breaks like staring at it How are you I'm Lindsay I'm such a fan of you. Oh, thank you. Wow, she's very pretty.

She's gonna- Now just watch him, he never breaks. Oh, yeah. Look at what he's doing. That's pretty well. Yes, he's wondering where his mom is. She's in Atlanta with my husband. It's typically like you scan the room

or go back and forth, but he just stares at her the entire time. Eyes up, eyes up, eyes up. That's your team. Aren't you a secret train person? Yeah, I do actually. I'm a huge fan ever since I was a kid and I'm stuck here. But it's okay, Lindsey's cute.

He's pissed off, he's stuck there with this dumb ass kid and she's out hanging out with Heinz Ward. Yeah, he'd rather be with Heinz Ward. But the kid was definitely dead eye locked on the step mom. Vern was hilarious in this to me. And the new wife, the structured person, wants to make Vern go outside, wake up before one o'clock in the afternoon. Just, just.

Like even when she first got there, she's like, what do you guys wanna do? And he's like, I'm just gonna go play some video games. Yeah. And so let's play number four. His reaction to her new rules is hilarious. On the West Coast, with Vern still asleep, a bored Lindsay kills time by snooping around

to see what she can learn. He is obsessed with making. Just tons of pornos. Just porno after porno. Oh, Vern. There's a lot of Vern stuff, but I don't see any of Brittany's stuff anywhere. I know him and Brittany haven't been dating that long, but it definitely is Vern's home.

Morning. Afternoon. With Vern now awake, Lindsay is determined to get to the start He just turned right around. Yeah, start getting ready. Go back in. He's going to sit at his desk. Yeah, I want to come hang out with you.

I'm having a wank. It's 1pm. Oh, so I'm getting booted. Well, kind of. Okay. She's not easy to talk to, because she talks so much. Relatable. We've all been exactly where Verne was. Did you enjoy the, if we can still talk Goodfellas, the turnaround in Goodfellas?

When they're driving home at 6 in the morning, and the mother-in-law is like, where were you? Oh. when they're driving home at six in the morning and the mother-in-law's like, where were you? And he just turned right around, walked right back to the car and he's left. Yeah, and then left, yes. Anyway, same bit. Yeah.

I love that. Berndt Schreuer, king. Yeah, relatable. Oh, I like the female, but that's the thing too. What a kind way to... All I have, I have stacks and stacks of porn. I enjoy the female body. You are painted all the way in the corner

and the only possible answer, I appreciate the beauty of the female form. Do you not think women are beautiful? Yeah, I sure do. Walking out at, I don't know, 11 or whenever you woke up and you're like, okay, let me start my day, and then someone just hits you with, oh, good afternoon, sleeping beauty.

So I appreciated that just heel turn. Okay, I'm not here for this. You wanna play your clip? Which one is it? Let's play number six, Clayton. So, Hines Ward and his son get told that, hey, no more rules in this house. You get to just make a mess if you want.

So they, yes, one day. That's sort of the premise, yeah. One day is rules day, or the wives get to set the rules. So you live there for like a week, you see what the scene is, and now she can implement, this is how things are gonna be today. Yeah, and in Verge Royer's case, Hines Ward's wife wants to get him to get out a little more.

Let's go have some fun. She finds out that the son is into cooking, so they go to a dinner with a nice chef. He's in the game and he can talk to the kid, and he's like, I'm gonna go to school now. And the kid's loving it with his new mommy. New mom. And at the other house,

Verne Troy's girlfriend is like, hey, this is great the way you guys do things here, Hines Ward and Hines Ward's son. Let's have a little fun though. We don't have to clean as we go. Yes you do, by the way. But we're gonna have a little fun. We're gonna loosen things up a little bit.

We're gonna break the rules and this made me laugh. It can be a little intimidating to come into this house and have everything be so perfect. Yes. So clean up can wait. Yay. So the kids idea of acting out. Pause it. How's that not a meme? So wait, Brittany Wood.

Of course, you're following Vern Troyer. Yeah, you're you're you're going to be like a king. You mean me? Yeah, but he's got money, though. Like, I know, but I'm just saying as far as your woman or pleasing your woman or whatever, if you're following Verne Troyer, you're going, I'm hoping that any one of us would at least Maybe, but I don't know dude. Dudes with money, they get it done. Buy the right equipment. I think we're overrating how much money he had. I mean, look at that. He lives in North, dude, that house in North Hollywood, though, it's not a great neighborhood,

but that house could get you probably something similar to what, I was gonna say similar to what Hines Ward has in Atlanta, but maybe that's dumb. He's got as much money as you do. So you're not like blowing up water on him. No, no, no, I'm thinking he's doing, no, I think, I don't think he's doing as well as Hines Ward, but I do think, you know, he was mini don't think he's doing as well as Heinz Ward, but I do think he was mini me

and he had one role. Yeah, but he knew how to live off that as far as comic shows and all that shit, but I don't know, I guess I'm just saying. I think he probably ran through a bunch of his money too. Probably true. I'm not thinking he was very. Well, I'd run through her.

All right, sorry. I'm telling you. Here's how the kid acts out. No, sorry. I'm telling you. Here's how the kid acts out. Oh! He tosses one throw pillow off of the couch and turns away from his dad like he just got away with something serious and Heinz Ward looks like he's infuriated. Like, that kid has been hit before.

I'm just telling you, when you see a kid where you're like, do anything you want, and he's like... And the dad just, hoo! That's a tense household. Well then she starts acting like an animal. Just ripping everything apart,

just throwing things for throwing things. Yeah, just, it was upsetting to me. All right, let's end with Vern's rules. So Vern's rules, yeah, you gotta go outside, you gotta do something. You're gonna track the kid's phone, and then Vern was not happy and he wasn't having it. Vern, we're gonna get out of the house and get moving.

If you don't have to, why do it? Right, Mike? Well, I think we have to. Okay. Go green. And Vern, you gotta put more effort in for Brittany. We gotta do something to show Brittany how much you appreciate her.

I'll let you come up with that one. I'm not excited at all about the world change. I think it sucks. Hey, show your girlfriend that you actually like her. God, what the? Sucks. What is this? The song's like, let's get Bernie to the beach.

And the- We'll have a peenie party. He does take her to a lingerie store. Really, okay! That's his idea for doing something nice for his girlfriend is he wants to buy her lingerie, so he makes Heinz Ward's wife go try it on for him. Yes.

Sly dog vernew. Genius. I was wondering if he would do that, but she didn't. Well, he was trying for it. Right. Yeah. It's a good show. You I was wondering if he would do that, but she didn't well he was trying for it right yeah It's a good show. Yeah, I might have to take it like it is a funny premise weird the nameless is absolutely Hilarious to like just throw a dart you're hitting charo and Jill wheelin Charo yeah, she was

She was the little girl in airplane that was, they were playing the guitar for her. Yeah. She was in Fantasy Island, or no, Love Boat with Charo. Why don't we fire up season three, episode seven with Dweezil Zappa and former Major League outfielder, David Justice. Jesus. How many years did we make it? Three, four?

At least four of the celebrity version. There we go. That's our sports. Very good. The third one had Flava Flav. Remember? Was that what started his comeback? There was a Flava, well.

He had a reality show. I feel like the start of his comeback was appearing on the ticket. And it was an early GBL guest, guest, guest booking league. For those who don't know, we used to do something called the guest booking league. Yes, you mentioned the GBL last week and somebody said to me, what is that?

Have no idea. So I think we can bring it back now since people don't know what it is. But yeah, we booked him, and then we had to go to a Flava Flav concert at the AAC, where there might've been literally 70 people there at the entire AAC.

Less than Charlie Sheen's concert? Charlie Sheen was like 10,000. But he still went half stage on the floor of the AAC. Less than Charlie Sheen's concert? Charlie Sheen was like 10,000. But he still went half stage on the floor of the AAC. Yeah, no, Charlie Sheen was rocking. That was a great night. Flava Flav. There was no... I mean... Did you get the shirt from Charlie Sheen? The Sheen-us. Sheen-us. Yeah. Or winning. Tiger blood. Winning. Aids. Ha ha. Ha ha.

Anyway. 70 people at the AC. Ha ha. Just pretzels spinning, popcorn popping, all lonely. What's next on your show? How about a break? Oh. The Dumb Zone.

The Dumb Zone. The Dumb Zone. The Dumb Zone. The Dumb Zone. The Dumb Zone. The Dumb Zone. The Dumb Zone. The Dumb Zone. The Dumb Zone. Ah yes, the great Mike Saroy is here. K Bradley and M Griser man on top of the leaderboard right now at the Arnold Palmer Invitational. API hit Bay Hill. It's Keegan Bradley our Ryder Cup captain in the upcoming battle against Europe and Max Graserman a real up-and-comer

incredible putter. Yeah? Yeah. It's a windy morning out there. Anything under par is gonna keep you in the tournament. Gonna be a hell of a week. Has Patty teed off yet? No. There's one under through three. One under, rock solid. Yeah, got a shot. Patty C.

Is Tiger in it? Tiger's not in it. Why? Cause he's still injured. Oh really? And I got even worse news, I don't think he's gonna be part of the Players Championship next week, the fifth major. Will Tiger ever win another major?

I'm sorry, I told you I had bad news. We had a live stream planned. I'm gonna need to visit that severance elevator for Tiger Woods's injury. I got it, you come with me. No. Are you still getting paid severance? Yeah, absolutely. What day did you get let go fromance? Yeah, absolutely.

What day did you get let go from? Let me tell you, the way to answer that question on a daily basis, we could have a Twitter account like is Nico Harrison still a dumb ass or whatever and it just tweets yes every day. Did Dwight Powell get hit in the face? Did Dwight Powell get hit in the face? The day you'll know that there's no longer or the week that there's no longer a Mike Sorroy severance will be when there's a Mike Sorroy

new podcast. I'm frantically calling you both. Yeah. Guys, let's get something cooking. We're not far off, but we're still in the- What if you started podcasting now to kind of build the but we're still in the. What if you started podcasting now to kind of build the base, no? Rather the. The procedure was 12 months. Big blast. The procedure was 12 months.

I have no choice in the matter. You had a 12 month severance. I did. Wow. It's incredible. But I remember thinking, oh my God, when football starts, I'll be like not even halfway. And then football comes and then it's over. It goes by quite fast. Oh now you're saying... Now I'm fucking up against it.

When is it over? I actually don't know exactly. That's really weird. No it's not. No because when you get fired you get like your last check and then you get another check for live spots and that kind of thing which is not a full check and then the beginning of the next month, I think is when the severance actually started. So I'm not positive the exam. And you had 12 months. 12 months.

Yeah, it's really, really weird. It sounds great. Oh, it is great. Like it's exact same pay. Yeah. Or a little less. Oh, well, a little less because I'm not, I have no live spots and stuff, no extras, anything, just kind of the base pay. But it was the most I'd ever been paid. What was that? The most amount of money. 200 grand?

No. 150? Near. Right. And had I not got fired fired it was escalating upward still and then option years and all why'd you get fired shouldn't have done that wasn't very good apparently I'll tell you this because I do have you should have done more marble races on the air that seemed to work people like that and people love people really did love the marbles People loved the marbles. They loved the marbles. The one thing I remember when we got canned, and the truth is I will with you guys or somewhere do a discussion about all of it a lot.

A lot of it, what I think are somewhat interesting things if you're interested in the DFW radio scene. Can we book that? I might have somewhere else to do that. Okay, we'll see. Either of those outcomes would make me happy. But it's funny, like, when we got fired, it was like mid-show on a Friday, somebody saw something, like an email of Eagle something,

like someone saw something they weren't supposed to see it and like whoa like that's and then we were like in the brakes whispering like holy shit I think this is happening today and then that sort of sort of kept building like well I didn't know and we walked in that day absolutely no idea although you could tell it was a pretty rickety fucking boat which I will provide a lot of detail about when the time is appropriate and I look forward to it, but you started getting the whole This is fucking weird. And then the show after us Was in a meeting and they're like we might not do our show to like you started figuring it out and then right when it ended

They kind of show up and will you come with us? Which is real fucking weird because once I do, I suppose disclose everything that went down there, like we never talked to anyone ever. So nobody had ever greeted you after a show and said, let's talk. No one there doing anything. Okay. But that'll be discussed to the later date. So you clearly knew why you are walking me down the hall. Oh yeah, by that point we knew.

And then. It's all the Turk. Me and Danny and Kevin, like you kind of go to the offices and there's three of them and we all, they ushered us all into a different one. Oh nice. Where there was like two people in each of them. Little prisoners dilemma.

Yeah, all at the same time and like almost by the time I walked into the office, I walked in, Danny was walking out, we knew. And Danny's awesome. He literally didn't say a word, which is cool. And I went into mine and it was whoever, two people. And they just fired us. What'd they say?

We're not gonna not continue with the downbeat anymore after this, we're, you know,'ve tried, but we're gonna make a change and ratings suck basically, all that. My plan was to not say a word, but then I was like, all I did was kind of inquire about my severance. Because at that point I knew that it was 12. And I think I said this before, and I hope none of this is getting me in any...

It's almost over anyways, they're not gonna claw them out of your back. I need the 15th. But when I reviewed my contract, I freaked out when I saw the paragraphs at 12 months because I remember I did do something to ensure that it was in there, but I didn't triple check everything. The contract is so fucking boring.

Yeah. You know, and even when you get a lawyer and they redline it, I'm like, oh, all this stuff's crazy boring. You know, and even when you get a lawyer and they red line, I'm like, oh, all this stuff's crazy. But I called Danny, I was all excited, I'm like, because we were supposed to have identical contracts, I'm like, check this page, check this paragraph, and his was three months.

And I was legit pissed for him, you know? But anyway, while getting fired, I was kind of, just as long as my severance applies, like I understand, cool. Like that's all I, and the only thing that they seem to respond back to that was that as long as you adhere to essentially the rules of the severance, which are varied and get a little muddy and confusing, but the thing that they highlighted multiple times was basically don't go on podcasts or whatever and rip us to pieces.

Like don't besmirch the company, that kind of thing. Oh, what do they call that? Disparagement. Disparagement, exactly. I think that's, Matt Bernick would inform us that you can't say that. You can't, but if they wanna tie it to your severance, you're gonna be battling that in court for a long time while you try to figure that out.

Right, so the company still wins in the long run, like all the time. Yeah. So there's almost a loose implication of they didn't even care that much about going. Like you could beat it if you battled them. Yes. Going to do a podcast or a show or whatever.

I mean, I think had I gotten a job on terrestrial radio the next month in AM Drive, that probably would have triggered a lot of interest in my severance. But I kind of thought they just didn't give a shit as long as I didn't smudge or disparage the company. So like that'll be easy to do. Yes. When I just do no one sees me for 10. Yeah, really. And then we're about two months away from the great disparagement, which I'd like to invite everyone to.

But the genius behind it is, is I calm down, forget. People who care might still care, but they care less after a year. Right. When you're in the middle of something, you're like, man, if I ever left, I would totally do this, this and this. And then after a while you're like, you know what? I just yeah what I'm happiness for myself. But that said I do have a lot to say Yeah, I was gonna say I feel like I I should feel that way as part of getting healthier as a human But there are definitely still things that I wish there's just people I still hate. Mm-hmm deeply

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Early bird. Early bird. Maybe watch Severance. Maybe watch Severance. Early bird. Put a little smile on your face. In fact, it's cool to watch Severance. On Severance.

With a gummy. Oh yeah, no there's nothing wrong with that at all early bird CBD comm and Dumbs on gets a 20% off have you have yourself a weekend I'm rewatching the entire first season of Severance right now so I'm gonna start or episodes yesterday I'm gonna start because Dan's really into it and I have been told now hey once you get to season two you're gonna have to rewatch season one oh really yeah like several people is Dan's really into it, and I've been told now, hey, once you get to season two, you're gonna have to re-watch season one.

Oh, really? Yeah, like several people have said, after the first couple episodes of season two. I feel like I should've. You gotta re-watch season one. But I didn't. Why are you doing that? I loved all season one.

It's so hard, yeah. But Christina didn't see any of it, so it's a perfect reason, like, I want her to see it, and I wanna re-watch it, so we're absolutely plowing through that right now. It's awesome. The way they do though These TV series while they don't pick it up again for another two and a half years. You're like, I forgot everything. Yeah, and so

Yes, I need to now wait Let's say this the boys which you know, I love I Plowed through the four seasons and then all of a sudden they have another season But now it's gonna be have been two years since I saw the Latin. I can't remember anything. So now I'm going to have to wait until full series are done before I'm allowed to start watching. They used to just call those movies.

Like I'm waiting on Chicago Fire. They're in season like 13 or something. You've got to wrap up. Yeah. Yeah. All caught up. Anyway, you want to start with gummy thoughts, or do you want to just do some viewer mail?

Or what are we doing here? Well, we did Early Bird CBD, so let's call it Gummy Thoughts. OK. What do you got? Let's flip back over here. Let me see. Because most of mine are today are not. Oh, you know what?

This isn't a gummy thought, but I am going to go ahead and do it sorry the sauna mm-hmm early bird and Lucy which we'll get to later both perfect for the sauna but Jeff emailed he just said I love the sauna enjoy punishing workouts I've tried hot yoga the best combo both these things but also surrounded by scantily clad women. Where do you stand on? yoga class I've been to one or two really enjoyed I Really liked it, but I'd not not committed to doing it in any way I've tried to commit a bunch of times like I bought a five pack for like Black Friday

Mm-hmm, and I went to one of the hot ones and the Bikram is that synonymous yoga? Yeah, and I don't know that the female part of it is is a big factor Although hot yoga is definitely like to the point where you're like, alright Well, I can now see your underwear through whatever you were trying to wear over them. I Just can't chill out In hot or yoga period I can't relax like I relax. Like I can't, I feel antsy. You can't calm your mind and get into the... Not enough.

But the real reason I'm reading Jeff's email is he said, he lived abroad for a couple years and is married to an Indian American woman. All right. I notice interracial couples. So we were talking about this the other day, right? Because of, who were we discussing that was an older man that had an Asian wife?

Gene Hackman? Yes, exactly. And Uncle Gary maybe? Or no. Someone you knew had a neighbor, I think. Oh yeah, yeah, my mom's neighbor, yeah. Mail-in. So Jeff, very smart guy. Mail-order guy. Lord or bride traveled the world pointed this out

You have a lot of situations with significant attractiveness disparities and where the white person is overvalued He said one old white man with much younger attractive Russian or Asian wife through the mail or met overseas. It's common Non-attractive white man with same age attractive American born Asian woman. Common at many good colleges, though this is in the decline because Asian dudes are now in better shape and they're getting better looking than white dudes. I have noticed an uptick in the Asian with muscles.

Max the trainer. A hot Asian male. Is a hot Asian male with muscles. Max the trainer. A hot Asian male. Is a hot Asian male with muscles. Max is very hot. Number three, white woman often large with much better black dude. Much better looking black dude. That's a, mm-hmm.

That's a tried and true. Kmart special for you anytime. White woman often mediocre with very handsome Middle Eastern dude. I spent a year in Cairo and had friends who were college girls spending a semester there. These at best semi-cute girls were treated like they were the hottest women in their high school. You show up over there you're a mid-white.

Glowing. He also says there are a lot of doctor couples of very plain white women with very handsome Asian or Indian dudes. Is this yoga or sauna related? He just said introed his email with that and I wanted to, the interracial relationships part was what I wanted to follow up on. It is a dynamic to me that I. Something I've noticed that is unreal, how many interracial couples are in commercials?

Oh, that's a, yeah. Have you discussed that? Like it is 60%. Yeah. It doesn't really matter the product. Any, every commercial break, watch. Yeah, it's for sure. Maybe you get the kid kid get the mixed kid

Cuz way more of the White man black woman than in real society, I think Probably so in commercials. Yeah. Yeah, because that's the route that makes people feel good. It doesn't piss off white guys Like if they when they do black guy white woman commercial right that pisses off white women and like you saying down pisses off white women I'm sure I'm not buying yeah and it pisses off black women right it's only making black men happy and that's just too small of a yeah no black men are 10% of the population yeah yeah or anytime there's any group of friends getting together everyone is represented you know yeah the community college brochure yeah

exactly yeah it's just in any commercial you have to do it yeah so I have a couple gummy thoughts that aren't emailed they were just mine okay I was thinking throughout this week and I jotted them down This stems off of our talk about they them My wife has a friend who's dating a guy who identifies as they them And I just thought Because there is a big thing. Obviously, this is a huge political thing now. I won't say that and I could do that That sucks, you know, we're gonna call you by whatever. Like what? I was thinking then about the interaction with Deion Sanders and a reporter who said Deion and then he demands to be called

Coach Prime. If you as a person just asked to be called something, shouldn't we just adhere to that? Who cares? Why does that bother anyone? If I'm going to call you they, then why do I care? What am I going to tell my kids? If you say I need to be called Severance Saroy, I'll call you that. If Deion says I want to be called Coach Prime and not Deion, I'll adhere to your wishes. What do I tell my children? How come you get to change your name? Everybody can do it.

We can all do it if we want. Yeah, you can do it, too Tell your kid she could do it too if she wants She can be called Dion Because that's open because coach prime is gonna be called coach prime. So there's nobody being called Dion right now, dude I was so close this morning. We were on our way to this is gummy thot. We're on our way to school and Nora has a stuffed animal that's pink but it's a she thinks it's a male I don't know why we were talking about that. Did you inform her that that would be a gay male then? Well she was like

well yeah he's pink even though he's a boy and I was like yeah that doesn't really matter you know I was like your dad had a pink easy bake oven that him me and Joe would make treats with, you know, and who's more manly than the two of us now. You wouldn't be able to have an oven as a kid unless it was a pink oven. Like they didn't make- They didn't make a camo one?

Yeah, with a skull and crossbones on it. No, it comes with like, yeah, but you can- Yeah, Joe's gotta eat black icing. How am I gonna become the bear? Right, if you're just confined to thinking for fairies. Or Super Chef Bobby Ferry. Yeah, as a man.

You know, I was like, yeah, you know, boys can like pink too. There's really no boy-girl thing like that. I was like, you know, brother likes to play with some of your stuff and you play sports and stuff. She's like, yeah. She's like, you know, girls can do things like, you know, some of them play basketball. And I was so close to being like, some of them can ref regular season basketball.

That's right. But don't get greedy and think you can do. Or you could be the back judge in the Super Bowl. Hot magic in the first round. Yeah. Yeah. My other gummy thought had to do with, these are all things we were talking about and then I, you know, you get home and you think more about what we were talking about that day. So this has to do with the ant falling off a building. What a year. It might be the year of the ant. Take it from the top, please. It might be the year of the ant. Take it from the top, please. So the thought is an ant falls off this table.

Mm-hmm. It lived. How many times its length is that? Okay. 100? Okay. So that means that would be like you falling off something that was 600 feet.

You would be dead. Yes. The ant walks away. Not even phased by falling off this table for sure. We watched a video, somebody sent us that the, an ant, a guy dropping an ant off his house just to see. Ha! Very, and it was scientific.

Like he filmed it and he, you know, the frame per second, he was able to calculate the speed. He found the ant, you know, little dazed, but he's- Driveway? Oh, it was on like sand. Well. Yeah. So anyway- Yeah, this is like an airbag, this carpet right here,

of course he would survive. So the ant debate has gotten us lots of emails and people and physicists or whatever telling us why and velocity and mass. Of the terminal variety. Yeah, of course. I didn't really think about that, you know. The only velocity that matters. Of the terminal variety. Yeah, of course. I didn't really think about that. The only velocity that matters.

You can only get going so fast. Yeah. Yeah, and mass. He comes from a speed racing family, though. Mass, the gravity, I'm sure has something to do with this, all this kind of stuff. Something. So they were saying, yes, I mean,

even if you dropped a mouse off it would be okay. But then my thing was, okay at some point though the heaviness is just too much. So we're at a two story building. Maybe it's a three story building and we start with an ant. Okay. And then how far up do we go? Work our way up to Vern Troyer?

Mouse, yeah, mouse. Eee. Small cat. Yeah. Yeah. You know. Before the splat happens. Right.

Just how big. Well, I feel like a mouse, let's see, it's not just size because I feel like a mouse would probably die and splat, but a cat, I don't think would. Right? Would a mouse, wouldn't splat off of a house. I don't think it would either a two-story house I don't think so. I think a mouse would die if you threw him off a two-story house and I quite sure a cat would not So it doesn't just yeah, it's not just about the mass right some like physical traits to it also. Yeah, I think The thing is that nobody knows unless.

This guy, unless this guy gets a mouse and a cat. Right, we need to get all these, do the Noah's Ark type thing. Get two of each because you can't just do one because you need a scientific control. You have to have more than one. Well, yeah. Anyway, this is why this is called gummy thought. This is an excellent

gummy thought. Right like re-ignite this later tonight if you're sitting there with your early bird cbd. So if you threw an ant out of an airplane it's no different than an ant off the roof of your house? I think so yeah I think that's pretty much it. I mean he's gonna live? You throw an ant out of an airplane and he's just gonna- I think it would land and say what because The the weight of the ants it would kind of float letter Maybe Nobody really knows trippy. Uh Let's see here. What was the one I wanted to make sure we did. Okay, we were talking about this with Blake's I got a couple Blake related ones here with Blake's

State championship game where this Is this no longer Gummy Thoughts? No. Okay. You want to make this part of Viewer Mail brought to us by Lucy then? Sure. Don't we have to do that? Well, I mean, we've got, I was kind of keeping track of it.

Oh, I'm sorry, my bad. No, nevermind. I'll just let you go. Sorry. You're fine. Let's go back to you. Okay, so Blake had a state championship game or a playoff game that was determined

location, date, and time back and forth between the two coaches, right? Yeah. One coach says the day, the other one says a time, location. I don't know how it all works. But Brent, our resident high school football coach listener sent me like the backstory on how flipping coins

in the playoffs works. There was something called the Klel Wade Coaches Directory. Are you familiar with this? Yeah, but. He sent me like a screenshot of this book. In football playoffs, here's how it goes. Coach A will say a random town in Texas and Coach B will immediately say odd or even. And the directory has the zip code of the

high school of whatever the last number of the zip is wins. So Rockwall would be 75087, so odd would be the winner. They do this on the phone. There can't be any lag time. Oh, so no searching? So odd would be the winner. They do this on the phone, there can't be any lag time. Also no searching? Yeah. Also if you agree on the site, you have to flip for everything. So for instance, if a coach wanted to flip home and home

and coach B wanted to play at a neutral site, you'd first flip to see who wins that disagreement, home or neutral, then you'd flip for the actual site. So if coach A wants a home game and he wins the first flip, but then actually loses the actual flip for the actual site. So if Coach A wants a home game and he wins the first flip, but then actually loses the actual flip for home and home, he'd have to play at Coach B's home. See what I'm saying?

There's a whole tree of decisions here for neutral or no, which home, what side of it is neutral, which day and which time. Which chapter of officials is a big one. Yeah, they just flip and they'll use odd or even. I don't know. Scientific. It's extremely scientific.

Yeah, well, I mean, it is a way to... Obviously, this had to be put in place because of arguments. Of course, yeah. And then I got a couple on Gibber Link. We played this video the other day of a guy who had created an AI personal assistant. And he called a hotel that he knew had AI. Oh, I saw that.

Yeah, and they started talking to each other. Oh, that's right. And they switched to Gibber. OK. Yeah. Yeah, that's where the story's going. It's an esoteric AI language, but it can communicate 100 times faster than human language.

He says, obviously saves time on computing power, interpreting intent. So you could have like a whole relationship, like in a half hour. Basically. Learn everything about the other that you need to. Do it. Learn that you hate each other, yeah.

Call the cops. Yeah. Have, what's the sex my brother had? The restraining order sex. I've never felt anything like that. No, no. And I mean, look, you don't, you're not getting more, you're not getting younger. The clock is ticking, but there's still time.

You ever have real exciting, like wife, sister sex or something or whatever? No. Tell them how you lost your virginity. You didn't even think about it. Just give it a sec. I've never had a wife, sister sex. No. But something like that lost your virginity. You didn't even think about it. Just give it a sec. I've never had a wife, sister sex, no. But something like that, something that's just dangerous. You know it's, you know.

His first. Her husband is next door. Oh yeah. You ever have sex with a lady while she's talking to her husband on the phone? No. That's a good video. No. Oh, I did.

Okay, I did have sex with a woman whose boyfriend came home. And I ran out. She was in an apartment in Arizona, second floor. And I ran out on the balcony. And I was going to jump. And I'm like, what the fuck? I'm going to break my legs. Are you naked?

No, no, no. I put my clothes on. I had my clothes on okay. You were just still there Yeah, her window in the truck or whatever pulled up and she's like, oh shit I ran out to the balcony and uh, I'm like, I'm a jump my can't survive a two-story fall I'm not you. Oh bar. I'm not an aunt. Yeah an aunt So I got over the rail and I was like hanging on the rail, you know, and I'm like fuck. You're trying to like close the distance. Exactly, like every foot matters.

And it actually does. Like if I let go from here, it might be double fibula snap. But if I can shimmy down to the bottom part. But it was Arizona, so it was like all rock and fucking cacti, you know, like. Not lush. And then I decided, I'm not doing this. I'd rather fight this guy. I don't want to do that at all but I'm like if I'd

rather do that than break a fucking leg right now right and this is Arizona and I've had zero conserved weapons of any kind I don't know why she had a roommate so I'm like a devised I'm like like if there's a confrontation I'm gonna pretend I just left the roommates room and maybe still get out of here no problem so that was my backup plan but I did the ab and I think she said I'll keep him in my room so I silently slid this sliding glass door open and I did the living room, front door, you know, as silent as possible, close the front door, hop step down the stairs, gone.

I feel like a lady could get away with that easier than a man. Oh. Because yes, if you got home and your girlfriend's there or whatever, and she's like, I just gotta have that dick. And then she pulls you into the room and goes down on you and all that. Yeah. You're like, I just gotta have that dick. And then she pulls you into the room and goes down on you and all that. You're like, you're fine.

Like you don't care, but if my wife or my girlfriend walked in and I just said, hey, we have to do it right now. She'd be like, no, I'm not gonna. And then be out in the kitchen or in the living room. But yes, but you would be like, oh, okay, right now, sure. Let's go. Yeah, I never thought of that. I just want you to lay there. It's just an yeah, I don't want this track lay back Yeah, I don't want you to have to do anything and I have no work

I have no clue if that happened. I have no idea but it was a good ten minutes I was on the balcony debating this launch So she had yeah, she's in there working him like when's he going to lock down? How long when did you talk to her again after that? Do you remember if... We worked together, so, I don't know, I don't even... Soon? I don't even, oh no, I didn't think I even had a cell phone,

so this is prior to that, I guess. But yeah, we had a good laugh. I forgot about it. She was Asian, Dan. That changes the story in your mind's eye. I like it. She was Asian, Dan. That changes the story in your mind's eye. I like it. I like the story no matter what. So there you go. There's danger sex. That's the danger sex. Yeah, gummy thoughts.

Yeah, I don't know if that's a gummy thought. Are we on to the news? Uh, we can be. Well, I'm asking if you guys have any more. Uh, no, that about does it for me. Shout out Pope Francis. Is he dead? No, I hope not.

That should be in the news if he is, but... Did you want to throw out the opportunity to dial in and talk to Mike Saroy? Oh, yeah! Yeah. We're going to find out if anyone's actually looking for this. We just want to see if this phone thing can work. So we have a phone number. I don't think it's going to work. Oh, we don't have a phone number Try it won't work. I tried it earlier. You just not want to deal with it. No, no, no, I tried it's okay

Well, then never figured it stops the recording. It's a it's an ordeal. All right, well, we'll work on it for the future then shit future then. Shit. Here's Jay with the Dumb Zone News. But we promise we won't do it until you're back. Do have some breaking Mavs news that just arrived in the group chat, but this has nothing to do with anyone who played or plays for the team. They decided they haven't raised the prices enough.

So this for Brad Townsend. I think it's a press release from the Mavericks. In honor of International Women's Day and Women's History Month, Mavs TV will have an all-female broadcast talent team for tomorrow's Mavs versus Grizzlies game. Kylan Mills will work as our play-by-play announcer, with Reagan Pebley as our primary color commentator. Oh, Regan.

Regan. And Dana Larson as the secondary analyst. Leslie McCaslin and Nancy Lieberman will handle Mav Center Court for pre-half time in postgame. Just kind of a community outreach type thing, I think. Are they seeing how low they can get numbers? Is that the bit? Ah, I don't know.

I'm delivering the news. I talked to the- Just TV? Yeah. Like, Coop's like, absolutely not. Ha ha ha ha ha. Ugh. I haven't watched the full State of the Union address yet.

I was surprised that you had, when you told me that the other day. For some reason, I fired it up while it was on. I was like that you had when you told me that the other day. For some reason I fired it up while it was on. I was like five minutes behind. So I was really concerned that you were ahead of me and knew what was already happening because I'm watching it. It felt like I was watching the Arsenio show.

Like he walks in, people are hooting and hollering and whooping and just screaming. And then he'd start talking. And then the other side was booing and yelling. And people were yelling. And then Mike Pence or no, who's the other guy? One of those guys behind Trump is like, JDB. We'll be kicking you out of here. We're going to get the sergeant at arms, which sounds

like the guy's got a gun. Yeah. We're going, if indeed this continues. And then it did continue. And so they kicked some guy out. Yeah. And everybody's, the one side is screaming, yeah, yeah, and the other side's booing, and I'm like, what am I, what is this?

What's going on? I was double early birded, and I loved it. Yeah. It was so much fun. Well, you know what it is. I couldn't turn it off. And then after about an hour, I kind of like. It got a little old.

But when Trump is saying, we're going to go back to making ships, we're going to make the best ships. Dude, everything was bad. It was so freaking funny. It was all like, this is, you won't believe how big this is going to be. Everything, it was very vague and just out there.

The people in the crowd, the little black police officer who's now a Secret Service person and then the teacher here and it's just like a giant episode of Maury Povich right it's incredible everything's wrestling it's it's so it felt as idiocracy as I've ever now I will say but every day feels like that. I used to really trip out on watching the House of Commons and the British Parliament. Because this is just Tuesday for them. So this is just something we haven't stolen from them yet? Yeah.

Now it's coming over here? Yeah. I'm not saying it's a great look, but they yell and boo. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, do like make fun of each other. Brother. Yeah. Dude, they get after it. they yell and boo, oh, do like make fun of each other. Rather. Yeah, they throw, dude, they get after it. And that's not even, that's before you even get into,

wasn't there like some, Clayton may know this, like a third world country yesterday that in their parliament they had like a smoke bomb? And a couple weeks ago it was like the Maori people doing the hakaye Congress or something? New Zealand, yeah. Well, like back in my day, they had political stuff. In Serbia yesterday, we had much like a Serbian basketball

game, we had smoke bombs and players. Players. Yeah. But if I'm going to do the back in my day thing, I remember there was like a TV channel C-Span or something and that's where they would put political stuff and it was the most boring thing you've ever seen and now politics is like a ratings winner like what a presidential address in Congress yes let's watch it he's gonna be yelling at him and stuff yeah it's a it's good stuff. And that wasn't even an official State of the Union, right?

That was the address to Congress. I think it was just an address to Congress. Oh, that's not the thing? No, it's not the official State of the Union. So I was wondering why the Democratic side- What's the difference? I don't know, I think there is an official- You have to do the other one.

Right. I don't even know why the Democrats show- You have to do the State of the Union? I think so. And this one you don't have to do? I could be wrong about that. I think, addressed to Congress, he's just laying out his plans of what he wants Congress to do. State of the Union? I think so. And this one you don't have to do? I could be wrong about that. I think, addressing Congress, he's just laying out his plans of what he wants Congress to do.

Laying out his plans. Yeah. If Congress plans the State of the Union, he's just talking to the people that would go around. Is this what it's like having a normal person in here? Just like, knows stuff, anything? That's why we have sit-ins. Yeah.

We should pay them. We have sit-ins to tell us about stuff. Due diligence, bingo. What were you going to say? I guess you finished your point that it used to be boring. I don't know. This is how it is in a lot of the rest of the world, so don't feel too bad about it.

No, I don't like it. It seems like wrong. I want, I don't know. I like politicians that are just boring. But I think we're not going back to that. No, why would you? I don't know, I just like, I like it when they do all the things behind the scenes to F us. But they all publicly have this real calm face and it, like they can just hide it.

I like that better than when they just throw it in your face. Man, I've been the last couple days. I didn't pull any of these. But so you remember after the election, there was like the whole the left needs to find their Joe Rogan. And it was just lamenting. Actually, it was Joe Rogan.

Yeah, lamenting the loss of the online space to the right. Is that what you want to be, the left's Joe Rogan. Yeah, lamenting the loss of the online space to the right. Is that what you wanna be, the left's Joe Rogan? Yeah. Let's do that. Let's be you guys. I mean, that sounds awesome. Okay. But they're trying now to get like

Democratic Congress people to act like the roast twins and like do TikTok videos and try it's disgusting dude like this is the way we're going to get the youth like I saw AOC in a video yesterday where she was like pretending to be a character on a menu screen in a fighting game yeah dude this is not oh Dan's just got a fight hot yeah let's all see that. Jeez. And then we'll play High Hopes from Pete Buttigieg.

Like, it is, it is. The greatest thing ever. You gotta do the dance. I know. Da da da da da da da. It would be, it would probably set women back. It would be degrading. White House rips Choose Your degrading. It would.

White House rips choose your fighter video. It would. During AOC. Well, yeah, you think that they can get away with anything without him being like, this is gay. To my point though, I think it would be bad for male-female relations on down the line. But if the Democratic Party simply made like the highlight of their messaging for the next year,

just get some aged Democratic senators just pouring oil on a thonged AOC ass, they would have a better chance at getting their policies passed. And their policies are actually good for the greatest many, the greatest good, right? I believe in their policies. Their messaging is so bad, but they do have her and a couple of others.

Just do the Republican playbook and just make it about the dumbest shit possible so you can get it in the door and then do your plan. Don't go on IG Live if you're AOC and talk about child tax credits and pay leave Show your ass and titties and then once that works get that stuff passed. I Don't understand how this is complicated Like it's it would work better it Trump is not up there being like wow Here's how the budget's gonna work and this and that he's like, here's what's gay and here's what I think is cool

and who I wanna beat up and also, you know, pussy's good too. That's basically what he does. And then he's like, also I have these guys who wanna get this stuff done. We're gonna do all these policies. The Democrats should just do that. The White House tweeted in response to the AOC

There's your fighter video. Yeah, she's your fighter Democrats not be cringe challenge level impossible. It's not bad Unfortunately, that's not bad Ferris High School Blake The Buhlers. Don't know it. Golfer from Ferris was at a golf tournament this weekend, a high school golf tournament. Go on.

At Country View Golf Club in Lancaster. Also competing in this tournament was a student from Crandall ISD. Pirates. They were paired together at the tournament. Crandall's the Pirates? Yeah. It's the alma mater of the always lovely Christina Rae.

Well, the freshman from Crandall slipped into the water trying to get a golf ball, and he did not know how to swim. So his playing partner that day in the tournament saved his life. 610, the seven iron. Rescued him from the water. OK. Yeah.

Did he have to take a drop? Well, I don't know about that, but they did finish the game and they're soaking wet clothes. Finished the round. Man. That should be some kind of penalty. I think it should be a penalty for helping him. Cast drove a golf cart into a lake once.

Really? Accidentally too. No, no, no, we were like right on the water looking for a ball or something and then it caught mud and then the back end slipped into the water. It was basically halfway. And we tried to pull it and gun it and do everything we could.

Then we're like, fuck it, just grab our bags and jog to the parking lot. Just leave it there disappear The time to play what is Dan looking at I'm trying to figure out the fairest mascot yellow jackets I think I've yellow jacket. I think I've seen that water tower before Orange and white maybe yeah Yeah, 45. So yeah, I just see a thing here. There's a picture of a bunch of mascots. Ferris High School mascot Buzz, aka Alyssa Steinbeck, had a great time with the other mascots in the area as they participated in mascot meals on wheels today. So what? What the? That's a lot going on there. So you're

all hungry or old or who gets meals on wheels, right? what? What the? That's a lot going on there. So you're all hungry or old, or who gets meals on wheels, right? They're old, but they're delivered by mascots? Yes. You know how terrified I'd be if I was like 95? Yeah. Waiting on my cutlet, and the Ferris Yellowjack

walks in and introduces itself as Amelia Steinbeck? Boy, whatever district they're in or whatever. Beaten. I'm just gonna say the full headdress, Indian headdress is still alive and well in some mascots. Yeah, for sure. Looks like there's just a bunch of animals and then those two Native Americans, we'll say.

And then yes, there's Buzz. Some kind of Big B. Or yeah, Hornet. Do you play high school golf? Yeah. Not huge surprise, but. Yeah, a little bit, a little bit. It did seem like, I don't know how it is now,

and I'm not trying to blow up anybody's spot, the teenage sons and daughters of our listeners, but it was just a straight ticket to Reefer Town. Oh really? Yeah, dude. They're going to let you go just with two or three of your buddies to a golf course for three hours a day, twice a week. Yeah, there's a golf coach, but he's not tracking you on every hole.

And they would just go out there and roast bones the whole 18. And then your day's over. And if they did have to go back to school, who cares, you're just, go back to school high. So there wasn't enough golf teams to do just a strict Christian school, private school golf tournament.

So we had to play with the public school kids, which was wild to us. And it blew our mind, at one tournament, these kids got in trouble for sniffing markers. They're like, these kids are out of control. Just out on the course? They're just huffing? Yeah, just getting high. So your private school was not very... It was small. Well, it was small too, yeah. Because I had a buddy who went to Catholic high school and they were wild.

Like I never smoked pot in high school. We heard about the wild private school kids, but no, not us. His school was like Bob's church. Where like they looked at other churches and were like this is insane. No, when a public school kid would move in we could just sense it, like not one of us.

Yeah, like I remember Dan, I went to private school until third grade, and I could be recalling this incorrectly, but I believe the straw that broke the camel's back was when my mom found out that at the high school associated with that school, Fort Worth Christian, they were having like pretty major drug and sex problems with the high school.

And her thought was like, well then what's the point? Yeah. Why am I paying? I'm sending them there to keep them away from that. Yeah, and then I started. But those were the kids doing harder drugs than we ever saw. Yeah, and then that's before you even get into

the kids who have to end up in the portal. Because if you end up in the portal, there's two things that's gonna happen. If you're poor, you're going to the district satellite, whatever, the school for bad kids. But if you're not poor, you're going to Nolan Catholic or Fourth Christian. You just have to escape your school. So you got like 10 of those in every class too, of a guy who came from Keller or Southlake. Sometimes they just wanna be good at sports.

That also happens. The adverse was funny though. The private school kid that thought he was awesome at sports just went to the public school to play. He was back the next year. Yeah. Forgive me. Cause you yelled at me earlier.

Did we sponsor this by Lucy? No. We were supposed to, right? No, so I'm actually like one ahead on the list. I know, but we're gonna get to today in history, then you're gonna be to Frankel. Okay, maybe we should have then. That's what I'm saying.

But we have a little time. We have a little time to the- Hey, hey, guys, break it up. Don't you feel like right now is a great time to just mention Lucy then? And also Lucy has- I think there's actually never a bad time. Oh, break it up.

Hey, see what he's doing there? I did, yeah, it took me a second, yes. Lucy.co. That's the nicotine pouches. Are you familiar with Lucy? Oh, no, I was learning about them. I'm interested, tell me more. Yeah, clean. He said, what's the nicotine pouches. Are you familiar with Lucy? Oh, no, I was learning about them. I'm interested. Tell me more. Yeah clean He said what's the like no to that and like and then he used a term for an old pouch

Yeah, the old the old crap people used to use before these great products those had tobacco these don't yeah Dude, I'm not dirty. It's not it's these are like artisan pouches mom and pop a hundred percent interested and doing this farm to lip in pouches, mom and pop. 100% interested in doing this today. Farm to lip. Mm. Ha ha. At lucy.co slash dumb zone. That promo code's dumb zone.

You'll get 20% off your first order and free shipping. Get a 30-day refund if you don't like it. I love it. I'm an Apple Ice guy. They got the fours. They got the eight milligrams. What if my first order was a million dollars? Like, I ordered just a million things of Lucy.

You would pay $800,000. Can you imagine that? Yeah. They're basically giving you money. Not $800,040 for shipping. Yeah. $800,000 flat. Sweet.

It's good stuff. It tastes good. Welcome to the land of Lucy. There you go. Their new tagline, welcome to the land of Lucy. Yeah. Confirmed. And here comes the fine print.

Lucy products are only for adults of legal age, and every order is age verified. Warning, this product contains nicotine. Nicotine is an addictive chemical. Lucy.co slash dumb zone. Boy, I ran my mouth there about how I had the spots in order, and now I'm a little thrown off. That's why I said forgive me, because I know

Police in Plano. You don't like to be publicly made to look like a fool. That's never happened before. Oh yeah, never. So there was a detective in Plano who was working on a porch pirate case. And through that, unraveled a murder for hire plot. Okay. Through ring cameras? that unraveled a murder for hire plot. Okay, so that detective-

Through ring cameras? Yeah, was looking at some package theft, some vehicle break-ins. Into that investigation, an off-duty detective actually ran into the suspect, who didn't know he was talking to the officer. That's tough. Nice.

Yeah, so this is back in December 2023. That was a 38-year-old man who'd been linked to a few stolen packages. Fingerprint from one of the door handles matched him. This 24-year veteran of the Plano Police Department is assigned to the case. He learns that that guy will go to a local restaurant

quite often and so that detective just went there and started chatting him up. Guy started talking about his ex-girlfriend. Said he needed a silencer to take care of her and her new boyfriend. And so now the... So he was a cop, he was investigating him for the porch pirate stuff? And he was trying to get him to say something about... Yeah. And then we went up... And all of a sudden he's asked to kill his girlfriend? Yeah.

The detective told McCloud he could help him find a firearm silencer without disclosing that he was a police officer. Got his contact info. Then you hand that over to ATF. I was always, I was so interested in ATF as a kid. It was just cause of Waco. But I'd see it on TV all the time and I'm like, you know, the kid, you don't really understand the illicit trade.

I'm like, there's just no way there's as many cigarettes as drugs and alcohol. What's A? Or excuse me, firearms, alcohol, tobacco, and arms. Just the tobacco element of it as a kid just made no sense to me. Yeah, why is that in there? Kind of wedged in the middle there. I guess because people do like black market tobacco maybe,

maybe it's a bigger deal now with like the headshots. Cuban cigars, I don't know. Not Lucy, Lucy doesn't. No. They don't deal with tobacco at all. No tobacco. No, don't call it. Just nicotine So anyways, this guy's face 15 years her but I just think it's weird even a guy who's Pretty brazen and stealing packages and he's like man It's all bitch needs to I think it's weird to go to your local restaurant and just start talking to a stranger like, man, you know when they start yapping, you're like, yeah, I hate that too.

And they're like, you know what, I need a silencer. You're like, what? You thought we were just bitching about our ladies. Go to any Applebee's type, and Applebee's, Chili's or whatever. Those bars are full at like five o'clock. You're telling me? Oh, sorry.

Hahahaha It's been a while dude. Oh, okay. But I'll tell you. In like 6 months? No, I was very clear of that. Okay. I have like a where am I thing on my phone.

Oh no. But there was definitely a time where, man, the Buffalo Wild Wings or the Chili's or, you know, any of the, dude, from like four to five, you'll get like two drinks for $8. The vibe is just electric. I remember doing a remote at one of those places. Vibe is just electric. It is, and let me tell you why. I like places like that because, for the most part, the people there are not happy with their lives. But, in here, I don't even know which one of them

uses this slogan, everyone's family. If you go get drunk at the Ritz in Manhattan, everyone there, that's just an extension of how great their life already is. What you want to do is find places to go drink where this is as good as it gets for that person. And now you're all there just like this is the highlight of my week. Tough to have a bad time when you're in that setting with that group. Just the big 22 ounce. Give me a scooter. Of course I'll have the goblet. A dollarita. Yeah. Get drunk from

seven dollars. Half-price nachos. I was under the impression it was just for, like those bars were just for when people come to pick up to-go food and it's a convenient way to have a drink. No. It's a stop home on my way home from work. Yeah. Like nightly thing. Because I had a buddy, we did a show from one of those places in Arlington or something and he's like, oh, that's right by, that's my place. He's like, I stop there every day on the way home from work and have a couple beers.

It's the highlight of the day. Every beers. It's the highlight of the day. Every day? It's the highlight of the day, yeah. Then you need just a little bump. Yeah. After a couple beers. After a couple of beers. My favorite part about that sketch is.

The airplane. My favorite part about it, maybe this is just me, is at the end when they're going to have an intervention for Shane. And like, yeah, come in here, maybe we could talk to you. And he just looks at the camera and goes, no. Mom, dad, what are you doing? That's all you have to say.

No. No. I don't feel like it. Let's see. What a feeling that must be. I would never do it, but being a porch pirate might be kind of exhilarating. Not just the thrill of the grab. I heard the musers talking about it this morning and Junior saying that he saw in his neighborhood

like a coordinated thing where a guy bent over to tie his shoe and immediately car pulls up they run up to the porch grab it and they're gone. Like there was a guy walking away from the front doors, but he was like had eyes on it, was able to look out. That does sound fun. I don't even mean the theft, the actual theft part, but I just mean the open up, who the hell knows what all day every day. But it's got to be 85% shit.

Oh yeah. But then do you find a house? You're like, this dude's cool. You get a lot of fun shit delivered. But if it was my house, you would walk up and one day you would find a, somebody sent, cause all this stuff people mail us. They find that dog. Yeah, they find that big giant dog.

What the fuck? I got a Baker fathead today, that was mailed to us. Baker fathead, the bucky, that wasn't mailed but it could have been, The bucky centipede. Oh, the head. Bucky-peed. This. You know, it's a bucky human,

bucky's human centipede. Last week, somebody sent me this. It's beautiful. The leprechaun hat. Yeah. Well, then they wouldn't come back to your house again. But if you find a hot house, you know. Yeah.

Target it. So what would it be? It's just a, they have like. I don't know what you're looking for. That's an electronic racing wheel If you're a little game thing or golf club like a big long box, that's a good one new driver I mean I bet I imagine the biggest drink the biggest part of that come to my house gig That's a beating is just getting rid of the shit But you got to find a way to sell that to make it worth it.

Your idea cannot be I'll simply create an existence out of what other people have ordered, and you're like, oh, now I have a soap dispenser. You just don't need to buy one of those anymore. It can't be that. You have to be so- Like a service where you just got a random item sent to my house every day.

They do stuff like- That'd be kinda fun. They do that with like, there's like gift services or clothing services, right? Where they'll just ship you a box with five new shirts in it. Yeah, I've tried that before. Yeah. But that's something you want.

I'm saying this is so random when you steal a package off somebody's front door. God, it's just like a doorknob for, right, like under the sink cabinet or something. Look at the fuck. Toiletries, like whatever. Fish food. Put you in home. Oh my God. for like under the sink cabinet or something. Look at the fuck. Toiletries like whatever. Fish food.

But you get home, it's time to go to fish food. You get home, it's time to go to work. Just opening packages. Dude, how crazy is gummy thoughts? All day bro. How crazy is fish food? All right. Like where our-

Stinks. What we've come to expect and enjoy now. Remarkable. The other night I opened up my bag of coffee that I had bought online. Oh, Coast Hearths? Huh? Your Coast Hearth coffee?

No, that's here. I wish I had the Bernie Coast Hearth coffee at home because the bag of coffee I bought was beans, whole beans. Like, I didn't read the thing. I just saw it was pecan coffee or whatever. We did it again. Pecan, what do you say? That's something that wives will do.

What? Ground coffee beans. Oh, yeah. So that's what I wanted to talk about. Try to get those microplastics out and ground the coffee beans. So then now I have this giant bag of just beans. And so it was like 9 p.m. And I was out of coffee.

And this won't do for me. I need to have that coffee, even though it's really weak. So yeah, went to Amazon. It's remarkable. Delivery between 4 a.m. and 8 a.m. gonna cost $2.99? Yes, I need that. So it's sitting on your front by your front door? So yeah I woke up walk out oh look there's the coffee. Dude I got one for you we were it was Friday night maybe. I just didn't want to drive to the store at 9 p.m. There's something

where we had a kid birthday the next day. Like Nora had a party last Saturday, and Kristen had been out of town for work or something, I don't remember, but it was Friday night, and it was like, oh, we're not gonna have time to go to the store. And we just had her friend's birthday gift delivered at 4 a.m. that night, the birthday party was the next morning.

It's incredible! Didn't go to the store, didn't, she was like, I think, she's like, hey, the mom said she's into like crafty stuff. I had 10 options. It would be there that night. It was like 11 o'clock at night or 10 o'clock at night or something. It was there five hours later. She just got an aquarium, but there's not many fish. And then what's, what is the deal with this? We ordered it, but why would someone want a bag of beans? Because people do them, they roast them at home. It's fresher, Dan.

It is fresher. People do it. My dad used to do it. My wife's done it before. She's gone through every iteration of it. So do you have to grind it each and every day? Because if you grind the whole thing, then it's not going to really be fresher. It'll be sitting there.

I told you, I get woken up to the coffee grinder at 5 o'clock in the morning Every day she's grinding a new thing. It doesn't wake me up every day, but every day she's grinding. Yeah, I Just think I don't know all the coffee kind of tastes pretty similar to me too So I'm not thinking well some people are really into it though, man The setup yeah, I just have cure like up, cake cups, is that what you do? No, I just got the regular powder. Or glitter. Yeah, the regular, yeah, Mr. Coffee.

Yeah. I've got the little weight scale, I've got the brush that you use. Okay, see, that's too much, that's a lot of work. Branch press. I don't wanna work so much. You gotta like super into coffee. If I ever got into it, that's how I would probably

have to do it. No, I respect it, but I just don't have the time or dedication for it. We have an espresso maker, and that's it. No, I respect it, but I just don't have the time or dedication for it. We have an espresso maker, and that's what Chris uses, I think. It also can make coffee. Do you ever suggest that she grind the beans like the night before, perhaps?

Because that seems like a terrible 5 AM job in a house. I don't mess with it. She ever flick the bean? Totes, bro. Yeah, man. There's Dan M. There's Dan M. I didn't mess with it. She ever flicked the bean? Yeah. Totes, bro. Yeah, man. There's Dan Am. There's Dan Am. I didn't forget that.

He said there he is. All right, Lucy Spot and all, there's your news. All right. The Dumb Zone News. Like and subscribe. Long news. Was it? I don't know.

The Dumb Zone presents. The dumb zone presents. The bed is like 27 minutes long. Today in history. Today in history brought to you by our good friends at the Frankles, Mike Saroy, the phone number. Well, three. And keep it going, or trace, as some people say. Or like that, if you're John Cena throwing it up.

Three, three, three, three, three, three, three. All you need is three after either two, one, four. It should sound like this. Yeah. Yeah, this is actually the number three. You're getting yourself into a car accident. Make sure you're okay and then call the Frankles. You don't want to be screwing around

with an insurance company or other lawyers who were showing up in your door. You can't handle the truth. That's a lawyer. That is a lawyer. And that's who you'll talk to when you call the Frankles partner like Mark or Scott or Gene Burkett. So hit them up.

You're out of order. You're out of order. The whole trial is out of order. They're out of order. It's all threes, is the thing. Beep. Ha ha ha. Get a little vape in here, Mike. There you go.

I saw you hit one earlier. I'm not caring about the camera. I'm going for it. Let's all vape together. Viewer mail birthdays. Ooh, should I check the email? See if anybody's trickled in. Anyway, viewer mail birthdays for today.

Anyway, viewer mail birthdays for today. Dear Secretary of Poonland Security. Sorry. Okay. Okay. I'm a big fan. He happened to be leaning forward right by the mic. Did you do spit take? I don't think it was a spit take.

It was a snort. My favorite thing in the world. Today is my girlfriend Julie's birthday. She refers to you as Captain Cum. Her leader is 13 year old Blake jerking it in the laundry room. Thank you. That is still my top ranked bad beat. I'm getting a lot of them every day, but Hugh Jackenhoff standing

up with your pants down. Busted or just in your pants? His mom walked in. Oh! He was using the family computer, which if you recall was oftentimes like into the kitchen where the laundry room was. Yeah, no door. That's all. No door? There's no door. It's just at the end of the kitchen. And you had it on top of the computer, on top of the dryer? Yeah, I was just facing this way, then I just see something over here.

I'm like, oh no. Did you pretend to open a door real quick? The stand up too. Even go for it? The standing one is weird. TC goes stand like, you know, with the laptop on the back of the toilet. Standing. Yeah, I've never, I can confidently like, you know, with the laptop on the back of the toilet. Standing.

Yeah, I've never, I can confidently tell you. You've never had a knee buckler? I've never gone with a stand up. Please ask Blake, how would grown up authoritarian Blake react if he caught 13 year old Brooks doing this in the laundry room? Cut it off. This is a constant sort of, source in the laundry room. Cut it off. This is a constant source of debate between us. Cut it off. From HP. Hey, cut it off.

What's the debate? What would you do? Would you be understanding? Like, son, this is part of your life. Now you're run the ball guy. Talk about it. No, I feel for him. I think I'd be nice.

Maybe offer a rose. You're doing it wrong there, kid. Oh, pay me. Offer a... Gross. You're doing it wrong there, kid. Here, let me show you. Just sit on it. This is called the stranger. Yeah. Uh, dear mayonnaise inducer Dan.

That's so gross. I'm sending this from my AOL count on my Android phone. Anyway, it is your friend Melissa Miyaso's 41st birthday. The cookie cutting, knit knitter, dumb zone devourer. Here's a picture of Melissa. Pretty solid resume there. I threw a picture of Melissa into the new folder. I think we're up to seven pictures now

in the new Yawal folder, which we might just print off and we're gonna have a new wall. Good! A birthday wall. Well, the picture is just digital form. Is that how this works? You used to-

For now, it's just in the- Hand over photo. It's in our drop box. But yeah, now I'm gonna have to- We don't get to play. We need a printer and a fridge in here. Those are both items that can be procured pretty cheaply. Write that down, Blake. Perhaps even from someone's porch, if you come up lucky.

Yeah. Those of you in the pirate community. Yeah, maybe we have mini fridge sponsor. Kind of like a fridge slider. And dear Danny, calm down. I didn't even. No, it's okay. It fits from two hours ago.

It's the birthday of Matt Garrison. He is a spare who doesn't subscribe. Let's see. bear who doesn't subscribe. Let's see. Okay, then a lot of other stuff, I'm sorry. Here's a picture of some big fat tees from B and Fort Worth. Why are those not in the draw box? It's in there.

I think I threw it in there, but. I only look at show audio. I may have not thrown it in there. I think I threw it in there but... I only look at show audio. I may have not thrown it in there because I don't know if I'll put those up on the wall. That might be tough here at Fox 4. But we might. Just bare honkers? He also says not enough coverage on the assassination of the best gambler in Texas. You know anything about this? No. Chuckie is Is, Was, Part of the Bedrock that Props Up Modern Day Fort Worth Hip Hop. OK. Let's see here.

Elsewhere, today is Thursday, March 6. On this day in 1836, the Alamo fell as Mexican forces led by General Antonio, what? That rapper that we were talking about yesterday, that got shot at Slappy's car wash. Yeah. Oh. G Money Lil Ronnie was in fact

a very successful poker player, apparently so. Says here also, he's a powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful, powerful Blitz! Blitz! Blitz! That was a no Bob day. Yeah it was. Like it was yesterday. Yes it was. That was great. That was awesome. On this day in 1857.

The serial bit. US Supreme Court delivers a ruling. So it's Dred Scott versus Sanford. So Scott is a slave. So he's trying to sue for his freedom in court. However, the Supreme Court ruled, well, you're not an American citizen because you're a slave and slaves weren't considered citizens. So he couldn't even be in court here. You can't even be here. You might as well be, yes.

You can three-fifths sue. On this day in 1912, the Oreo cookie first introduced. Solid. Cool. Yeah, yeah. A fine cookie. Yeah. It took, so 1912, did it take like 90 years for it to start to they tricked it up a little bit? Yeah What if we doubled it and now I mean like green here and we do and yeah now it's harm I'm saying there. How'd you say that tiramisu tiramisu? Tiramisu that's what the first time sounded like tiramisu. I fucked I fucked that up before. I don't know the right answer. The chocolate covered ones by Eatsies.

I was just thinking this last night because I ate a couple of them. The last delivery I got of them, if you recall, was last year around this time. It might have been for my birthday because they have little pictures of the Eiffel Tower on them because I went to France at this time last year. You just polished those off? And I'm saying I still have some of them, and they're still good. A year later. No shit. They're insane.

Oreos. They last forever. Eatsies Oreos. Oh, Eatsies. Chocolate-covered Oreos. I bet you regular ones do too, though. Yes. No, but that encased in delicious chocolate.

That doesn't hurt. Regular ones definitely don't last that long Today's birthdays include Chuck Morgan. All right, the voice of the Texas Rangers Hall of Famer Michael Finley 51 Curiously quiet actually, it's there's nothing curious about it. He wants to have a job. Andrej Gerard, 47. Former cowboy. You know? Remember him?

Yeah. He got his head stomped by, what was his name? Albert Ainsworth. There you go. Leonis Martin, 37. You know. No. He was serviceable.

No. No, he wasn't. Tear on the pants. He was serviceable. No. No he wasn't. That tear on the pats. He always looks surprised. To be on base? Yeah. Cooper Manning, 50. The funniest. Good friend of Dan McDowell.

I sat with him at a football game. Yeah? Second half of a football game. Was he funny? Hilarious. I knew it. Shaq,ious. Yeah. Knew it. Shaq, 52. All right. Hard worker.

I got fired, I told you this before. Obie. I got fired from my job at Laurel Oak Country Club because the moment that the magic won the lottery to get Shaquille O'Neal, I got so excited. I broke a guy's chair, an old man named Aubrey. And it was his favorite wooden chair. How did you break it?

I like kicked my feet, I was sitting in his chair and kicked back like to lean, and the thing just disintegrated underneath me. And I got fired from my job that day. Because holy shit, the magic are getting shacked. How have you not just periodically latched on to the magic over the last handful of years and part of the reason they fired me It wasn't just that it I think it wasn't just the broken chair. They had to add charges on it So they said I stole

One of Monica sell us his golf clubs because she was a member and her bag was there She lived in Sarasota. Never played golf. I guess people were stealing balls that said sell us or something. So they tacked those charges on. Did you ever run into her? The broken chair. I never saw her one time there. I loved her. Greg Ostertag, 51. I once stole his pants at a celebrity baseball game. I remember that. As I got there early and everybody's uniforms were laid out. Mm-hmm.

But, you know, I gave him like XL, but this was in my heavier days for sure, much heavier. And I couldn't fit into the pants I had. So the only large enough pants were laying in front of Greg Ostertag's stall. And you just swapped the pants out? So I'm just looking around, yeah, I just went and set those pants there and I took his. And so... Greg Ostertag, of course, 7'2".

Yeah, oh, you know, gigantic. But it was like the only double X and I couldn't fit in, the X was not working for me at all. So I put them on and I'm, this is great. It was the best fitting pants I could ever have. You looked incredible. And so Greg Ostertag did finally show up and now we're all dressed. It was like, I can't remember what,

it was the Mike Madono celebrity game before it became the Dirk celebrity game. I think that's why it was. So yeah, we're all standing there. I'm great, I'm feeling good. He is, I mean, he's 7'2", and it looked like he had little kids, little baby pants on or whatever. Oh, what the fuck? But he wasn't really complaining.

He was being very cool. I'm sure he was. So what I did, without admitting what I did Without admitting what I did I said Hey, man you should take these pants and So then we swapped pants and those tiny pants on him were still real tiny on me But now I walked away kind of the hero of the whole room

everybody thought I was so cool for doing that. And when it turned out, it was the team. I only did that because team morale just skyrocketed. Yeah. You guys like he was happy. He's high fiving me throughout the like he thought I'm just this cool guy now. Ostrotag went four for five. Yeah. Six RBI is just massive game. Greg Ostrotag currently owner and operator of tags hometown bar and Grill in Mount Vernon, Texas where Art Brials was the head coach. Remote. Is that between here and San Antonio? Let's get him in.

More out Eastway. Let's get him in. I'd like to someday tell him. Do you think he'd remember that or react to it? I wonder. I mean it's an odd thing to be dressed up and then agree to switch pants with another man. That's something that I think he would. But also as a 7-2 guy, I'm sure he's been to other celebrity games where he was given

stuff that did not fit. Right. He probably expected like, oh, Jesus, here we go. But then a hero emerged who was slowly lowering his baseball pants. You're welcome, Greg. I got you. I got you, big G. Jared Reddick is 52.

Is that bowling for soup? Yeah. Wow. Don't be anti-Jared Reddick. I mean, I'm not, I don't, it was always a great dude. Very good dude. Very good, dude. It was just always it was a weird Situation I found myself in

Why booking him for the show or so no like okay? So I don't know how to explain this but they were like a joke to us like not a real band Right. I mean they played the type of music that we played and we were into, but we were like, these guys are pussies, like this stuff sucks. And then I started listening to Bob and Dan, and it was like their favorite band, and they'd become friends with them,

and they were like, these guys rule, these guys are super cool and nice. I'm like, these guys are literally made fun of by every, they're not cool at all. And then they went to their house and did a show and the guy had weed. So I knew as a listener, I'm like, well, Dan's never, like, he's friends with this guy now.

The Bowling for Soup is going to be around for a while. They did a song about Ohio. They did a kid's song that Dan's, and I just, it was weird, because I had spent a large part of my life making fun of Bowie for soup. Mining them, and now you're in his kitchen. My heroes are like. Was he the big guy?

No. No. That's Chris. And you know, I had a major problem with him too, because it's something I've never actually talked about on this show, I don't think, but there was a band, so, here's how this worked. You'd have to play in all these battle of the bands, right? So I would book at 16, 17, 18 years old,

I was trying to book us a battle of the bands every weekend. It usually would turn out to be like twice a month. And if you go play the battle of the bands, you would win stuff. You would win chances to play on regular shows for bands coming through town. You'd win equipment, you could win recording sessions, which is how we ended up with the 5 Minute Stranger album.

And so I've been doing this for a while, like I was really grinding on this, trying to get us booked, trying to book shows. And then all of a sudden, this group showed up called DV8. It was DV8. So I was like 17. They were like 12.

Except they had the best equipment. They had Orange County Percussion, which is what the drummer from Blink played. They had Mesa Boogie. They had like $20,000 of gear each. I'm like, who the fuck are these little kids? They were good. They had all the cool gear.

It's like, oh, Jared's their manager. Oh, really? Yeah. So that made you hate him more. Yes. I see. And these kids won, they opened the Warp Tour that I was there, bowling for soup played at it. Fat guy showed his ass, it was a great bit. And DV8 opened for that whole Warp Tour

because of these assholes Should have been you Could have been you If you just kiss the ring a bowling for soup never that's right David Gilmore 79 The Floyd Pink Floyd Rob Reiner 77. He's the Pink Floyd that if you're a Pink Floyd fan, you're like, sucked after Roger Waters left. Oh, there's a pushback over here.

My son's middle name is Gilmore. Because you love David Gilmore. Fuck yeah. Okay, but don't you agree that that's like a hardcore Pink Floyd fan might think? He's not gonna. I don't like the new Pink Floyd. I think, I mean, I've got, I don't know, I think it's, I actually think it's. Are you a hardcore Pink Floyd fan?

Pink Floyd tattoo? I was just gonna say, I think you were indicating a Pink Floyd tattoo. What do you got? The prism? What do we got? You got a jumpsuit on, show it off. Yeah. What are we doing here?

Dark side of the moon. Oh, wow. Yeah, the band. Applecore, no big deal oh I also have a Cartman tattoo saying that the Yankees suck ass all right this guy and I have hiding all this shit we got it so far I have a Nolan punching Robin Ventura nice where where yeah why not take it the hell not? Take it off. Take it off.

Oh, it's on your leg? That's the Cartman. All right. Yeah, I wonder if you can get that on. Probably not. Yeah. Try to put it. Put it on camera.

Put your leg on Mike's leg. Yeah, just put it right here. But no, I know what you're talking about though. Like there's a... What is that? That's Nolan Ryan. I know what you're saying though, Dan. There's like, there's the chili peppers

before John Fershanti. There's like Hallel. You're like, ah, no, I was in it when Hallel was in the band. Metallica has some of that. But no, Roger Waters is a fucking prick. He's fucking, what would he... That's what I've heard. ...tinges, like super pretentious.

Oh, there's no doubt. I'm just talking about the... Well, then there's other people that think it was no good after... What's his name left? Who's the real early... Sid Barrett. That's what I was trying to think of right there.

He was married to... What's her name, right? No, that's Sid Vicious. There's a really good... You ever read Comfortably Numb? It's a book. Mm-mm. I don't think that's... Vicious. There's a really good, you ever read Comfortably Numb? It's a book. Just about their whole history. It's wonderful.

He's got a Cartman tattoo saying the Yankees suck ass. I don't know if it is. I know how to read. I know how to read. I read. Well, if you're really stoked on Pink Floyd enough to have a tattoo, I thought maybe. And you're yelling at me about David Gilmore and your kid's name is... Push the microwave away.

Oh! Jeez. Don't have to push the microwave away. Back them up. Rob Reiner, 77. What's his bit? I don't know. He is a movie director and he was also Meathead on...

All the famous... What's the Archie Bunker show? Yeah. Armin Kiteeyan, 71. Finally Armin. Says he your Hang Zone guest. Yeah, we had him on when he wrote a Tiger book. Yeah. Tom Arnold, 65. Says he your bad radio guest. How would you be surprised if that was only once? That feels...

We had him on when Mark Cuban said he was yelling at a referee and something about a Burger King or excuse me a Dairy Queen manager would be better. And then Mark Cuban used that because you know Dairy Queen got in the news saying hey our managers work so hard and blah blah blah. So then Mark Cuban went to he did kind of a job swap thing. Well he just did the Dairy Queen. I don't think they let the Dairy Queen guy. Yeah they let the Dairy Queen guy run the Mavs and he traded Dirk. He traded Luca for Anthony Davis. Yeah so and back then it was the best damn sports show period and Tom Arnold was a part of that and they came out to cover it and We were doing a remote there that day as well

And so Cuban serving stuff and then Tom Arnold came over to us big fun It's knowing what I know about Mikey it is a shock You were never like a PA on the best damn sports. I worked on the Fox lot when they were there really Yeah, so I would see them and Christopher Rose, right? Wasn't he? Yeah. The main dude. John and Sally? He was? Was he on there? Their set was like right there. And yes, I probably did try to linger and get a job in there. Remember like last year when Tom Arnold was saying he was gonna find the Trump inward tapes?

It was like some big deal he was teasing like on YouTube or something there's some show he had. Yeah yeah he's like, awa. D.O. Hewley 61. I'm not a huge fan but his spot in Kings of Comedy is very good. Stedman, 72. Former Soviet cosmonaut Valentina Tereshkova is 87. She is the first woman in space. Oh. Didn't it totally cause like a tidal wave or something, having her up there?

Ah! Massive tsunami. She's in the government now. Like she's a, you know, Senator. Martin Cove is 87, excuse me, 77, that's the bad guy in the Karate Kid, and Tyler the Creator

is 33. The great Tyler the Creator. Blake, you get into his new album at all? The one from late last year? No. It's got some good stuff on it. I'll end with Born on the Stay Now Dead. Dead on the Stay Still Dead, you've got your Davy Crockett and everyone else at the Alamo. But they won, we won. It's all good, it's a positive.

And Nancy Reagan. The disrespect. Oh. Gluck, gluck. And Born on this Day Now Dead, you not only have Marion Barry, who you would think, boy, Marion Barry born on this day, that's the biggest Kemp spin we could have on this day. But what if I told you also born on this day,

Clifford Roberts. Wow. Masters are coming up. Right around the corner. The lake. Go down there, get yourself a fresh haircut. Want to give the Kemp spin for that? Get yourself a fresh haircut at the barber at the Masters and go out there and look over the land that you've overseen for all these past few decades where the only black people who appeared

were caddies, white people were golfers. You walk walk down to that pond, Ike's Pond, they call it, in these parts of the country, pull out that revolver and you say, I'd like to meet my maker right here at Augusta. And you blow your brains out, right there. And who did you leave your fortune to? A bull's dancer. No, wait, that was Craig Sager. Planned Parenthood.

That's right. I forgot about that. The very odd conservative turn where the guy was so racist that he saw the best use of his money be going to Planned Parenthood because he had identified they were limiting the increase in population of minorities. So. Beautiful golf course though. He liked, he wanted a portion.

Cheap concession prices. For that. To keep those prices down. That's an interesting, yeah, political spot to be in be in I know it drove him so crazy he killed himself yeah that's probably was the problem can't lay was like on 14 at the time right his approach he's kind of backed off the ball for a second and then flushed it nine feet circle it So this is the part of the program we call Closing Remarks,

where we get to feature our sit-ins, Darren and Brian. Darren, of course, the guy doing all the bits, right? Brian just kind of a guy who seems to be a smart guy who knows stuff. Who loves coffee. Who loves coffee. Yeah. Yeah, and yeah, Brian bought lunch.

Oh, and Brian bought lunch. Well then, let's really focus more on Brian. Yeah, let's get that on over there. What's your bit? Are you guys friends? Oh yeah, we work together. Okay. Yeah, Winewood, if you recall.

Oh yeah, he did look familiar. He was at Wired Wheels. Oh, okay. Yeah. Nice. You said nice to meet you, and I was like damn we've already met Oh, man, I'm sorry. That's never happened before right now. I should never say that. Yeah, you should never say that dude Good to see you always good. No. Yeah, we were we were together. He's a bartender and the server slash

Somalia there and what wine why wouldn't great by legit? Okay, legit legit. Oh, you're the guys that brought food that day? That was unbelievable. Yeah. It was good, yeah. Yeah. That was us. Right next to me, dude.

Wait, was he at YRWheels too? And I'm not remembering that. Yeah. All right. He wasn't wearing the jumpsuit. Okay, no, I love your purple outfit. I was wearing the signature jumpsuit. Fish don't have hair, blue shirt.

Remember, Dustin was very stoked to meet Dustin the Oregon guy. I was pretty excited to see Dustin. Oh, yeah, yeah. That was crazy. I was so sick of it. This is crazy. But that was.

Let me make you feel at home, and then I'll put on my fish don't have hair hat. Somebody mailed me. Oh, look at that. No Porsche pirate stole this. Looks gigantic on you, like that guy at Mavs and Cowboy Game. What if we kind of move the mic near you when you're talking?

Well, they're both kind of talking back and forth, so it's making it. All right, well, let's focus on Brian then, because he bought food at least for now. Well, I do have some notes prepared, actually. I was writing notes on my phone. Gummy thoughts. So I writing notes on my phone. All right, gummy thoughts. So I'm a day two sub.

Hell yeah. I started listening a little bit late though. I mean, I had the sub. I listened to you guys for the first week, but then you know, it was like, oh man, it's just so much easier. This kind of suck. Listening to cloud radio.

Yeah. Haven't listened to cloud radio in a while. Strictly on you guys now. Look at him go. But I'm about eight months behind. My goal is to listen to every single episode that you guys put out. See, I think that's a problem.

I'm slowly catching up. I feel like that's a problem, don't you? Just skip ahead to now. Just, yeah, I don't know. It's kind of like- Some people like doing that, though. But it's like the DVR conundrum. If you have shows-

No, I don't, no, I don't know. Piled up on your DVR, you feel like pressure that I have to get these now. I could do what Blake did at first, twice speed, but I don't know. It's nice listening, drives when I'm on my computer. Someone emailed us the other day that they're doing that. I'll catch up eventually. I don't think it was him, but somebody was like, can Blake see that?

So you don't listen to today's episode and then back, and I'll cut you off. No, I mean, so, okay. You're still trying to plow your way up to here. After the Luca trade, I listen to the emergency podcast, listen to the podcast the day after. I obviously listen to the Y. Will House episode and the episode currently right now.

Because you're on it. Yeah. But no, I'm about seven to seven and a half months behind. I'm just in July, like last July right now. Boy, the Cowboys are prime for a big season. You haven't got to training camp yet. No, so you guys are about to go to training camp. Fourth of July just passed.

Blake took his family out to the rodeo. You won't believe one of us leaves for like a month. Yeah, I know. No, I've heard something. I'm a huge spoiler. Hopefully. No, so when that happened, Darren was just like, dude, like, Jake's been gone.

Like, it's been Danny Bayless on the show. Like, we don't know what's going on. Like, oh, man, that's crazy. I don't know. Is he on a trip or something? He's like, I don't know, man. Yeah, sort of. No one knows what's going on.

What if he's getting divorced? I was like, that was. I'm not missing the show for getting divorced. That was one of the rumors out there, though. And then it was like a week later that I was like, dude, like it's set on Facebook, they're gonna announce what happens tomorrow and then it's all rehab.

Did you tune into that show? No, I did not. Oh, interesting. But no. Not that interested in you, Jake. Look, I assumed I would rank, me going to rehab does rank below the Mavs trading he. Yeah. Yeah. So if that got him to tune in, then yeah. Well, no, I was just, I mean, Me going to rehab does rank below the MABS trading he.

Yeah. So if that got him to tune in, then yeah. Well no, I was just, I mean, him and I were together when that happened, it just like rocked the world. I mean, obviously, but anyways, notes. Some notable things that I have just marked down since listening, the MacBook Tim McMahon tweet that Dan. That was great. That I Dan. That was great.

That I believed. That was an incredible moment that I'm glad that you are not going to let die. Tim McMahon has 10 Macs. Dude, they're like $500 each and I need one. Yeah, it was right around that time I was buying a new computer too. That was an all-timer for me.

Digital literacy not always at a premium for Dan M. I know Tim, he'd probably give it to me for 300. Yeah. Another one that I marked down, this was shortly after the Luca trade, July MBR. Dan says it's fun when other teams front offices make mistakes in reference to the Clippers, Kawhi, Paul George, that whole thing being a failure,

Paul George went to the Clippers, I mean to the Sixers. You know, it's fun to see other teams fuck up. Yeah, sure. And then Jake claims, Jake claims that Mavs will not make finals again in the next five years probably. Well, that's safe. There you go.

Little bit of a monkey's paw there, I believe. Yeah, that's true. Finger just curled. That's true. What happens now? And I mean, the truth is like, they were gonna be good, but it's not like there was a guarantee they were going back

To the finals. There was no guarantee. Yeah, you didn't know we'd be adding PJ and You know just those offseason moves were awesome. That's true. That was after the pj washing Okay, that was after the first trade like nausea and clay. Yeah. Yeah, I'm trying to make some good points here to You guys are currently talking about how great Nico's doing all that excited for the future I'm trying to make some good points here. You guys are currently talking about how great Nico's doing and all that, excited for the future. You're right in that era where we're just saying how great Nico is.

Yeah, I'm trying to, I think what just happened is Clay just got signed. So you're talking about him, is he gonna come off the bench, he's gonna be third man. And that was a little weird when they did it, but you're like, but they got Luca, and it worked for Luca. Yeah.

Damn. Other notable moments, just wanna say Dan is completely valid for the toilet paper turnover at one of the subs' house. Completely valid. Yes, I hate when toilet paper is hung the wrong way. Did you just flip it at someone else's house? Oh, I don't know.

Depends on how easy it is to get off. It was real easy to just slide off. It's not like a double push. You're just talking slide off and slide back on. But then I was informed later that some people put it that way so that the cat doesn't Oh yeah, that's right. Pull the toilet paper down.

Spaz out on that thing? Yeah. No, do it your way though. You probably had a... I just don't want to rub it against the wall right there. Whatever. And then other than that. I'm trying to help.

I just, you guys just got the moosing email. That's fun. And I just want to see, you know. Wow, there's some moose moosing email. That's fun. And I just wanna see, you know. Wow, there's some moose stuff that's been mailed to us. The beer, yeah. I was just gonna ask, eight months later, is anyone, is anyone? It was last night for me.

Has anyone had sex? Yeah, that's been in your bed. Has anyone here had sex since that email? I have, have you? Yeah. It's hard to moose alone. Yeah, okay. That's not it. I look forward to getting caught up. Yeah, man. How are you reacting to this news about the Burger King jalapeno cheddar bites? They're bad. So I'm surprised you guys didn't talk more about the Taco Bell cheese taco

more because there's something that they're adding where the tortilla is completely, there's no flour. It's just, well, I mean, it's fried cheese, but the tortilla is the cheese. What? I was surprised when you bring that up. So I've seen, so they have the, as I don't have to tell America, the Cantina menu now. I've been big on that. And they have like a grilled chicken taco

where the tortilla does seem to have something baked into it. Is that not cheese? I don't know. I think what they do is they, well I think what they do is, I just eat it, you know? Hold on, Clayton knows. There's a reason I'm here.

Yeah. I think what it is is just a pressed tortilla. Yeah, so they put the shredded cheese on the outside of the tortilla. And they press it. They press it and then it's kinda like berria style or what? Berria, exactly.

Yeah, those are dope. And they're not that, Oh yeah, beer or anything, yeah. Decent calorie count as well. What I will say though is we have too many, way too many Burger King sympathizers, like a burrito, like a burrito. Like a burrito. Like a burrito. Like a burrito. Like a burrito. Like a burrito. Like a burrito. Like a burrito. Like a burrito. Like a burrito. Like a burrito.

Like a burrito. Like a burrito. Like a burrito. Like a burrito. Like a burrito. Like a burrito. Like a burrito. Like a burrito.

Like a burrito. Like a burrito. Like a burrito. Like a burrito. Like a burrito. Like a burrito. Like a burrito. Like a burrito.

Like a burrito. Like a burrito. Like a burrito. Like a burrito. Like a burrito. Like a burrito. Like a burrito. Like a burrito. I'm tired of people pretending that it's like acceptable. I mean, Dan said the Impossible Whopper is like okay, which I guess, I mean I've had it before, but my thing with Impossible Meat is burger's gonna taste like whatever you put on it. Yeah. It's a very thin patty.

Right, and I like that. If you have too thick of an Impossible patty, it's not good. I mean, it's gonna taste like whatever you put, like. But I like the Whopper. I like the mix of the mayo and ketchup and whatever they put on it. I'm not here for it.

I'm a Whopper guy. No, I mean, go on YouTube and just look at a video like the mix of the mayo and ketchup and whatever they put on it. I'm not here for it. I'm a Whopper guy. No. I mean, go on YouTube and just look at a video of their flame-broiled action going on, and it's just like a conveyor belt that goes over fire. Yeah, but the patty just falls off and it looks terrible. He works in food. I do. I've never worked in fast food, but I am a big fan of quality meat and quality

meals, which you're not getting at Burger King. Okay, well. You're not getting quail at Burger King. You're not getting bacon wrapped quail at Burger King. That's correct. So if we come in, can we ask for- That is of course an opinion. I would love to advertise for Burger King.

Of course, yeah. I mean, this applies to everyone. They are open for business. Yeah, that's right. So if we come into Winewood, can we ask for Brian or Darren? Yeah. How does this work? At the bar? Yeah. You're the guy in the purple jump suit. Yeah yeah yeah this is my monkey suit at work too. This is just uh Brian yeah you can definitely

like request to sit in Brian's section but I'm just up at the bar. Winewood Rocks, make a good brunch. We do have a really good brunch. I do have a job interview directly after this. Okay. Yeah, yeah. Okay. Walking distance from here, moving on up. I love Burger King, so.

Fuck you. I didn't even know. I don't know. So make some work. Yeah. I'm just saying, these days, if you're going for fast food, Chick-fil-A or In-N-Out, why are you going anywhere else? Fast is quality.

Sounds like gay- Yeah, if you like eating cardboard at In-N-Out. Oh snap. Oh snap. No, but yeah, probably the ham steaks are terrible, but the burgers, I can't go wrong. Water burger is great too, why not? Hey, back to your own corners guys.

Yeah, I'm so out. I need a breaker. What do you got? You got any closing remarks there? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You're welcome. I thought we were done. This is crazy.

Just to be here, I really appreciate the opportunity to. You should be paying your money. Yeah, yeah, thanks for letting me pay you some money. It's totally, you know, privilege is all on this side of the table. Looking for notes. I was gonna do a rate my daughter's name about the name finway like finway park it feels a little difficult with you sitting here no it's not at all I worked with Julie for many years, and her kid's name sucks. I think it has a touch of throwback to it. So it's not taro, it's not good,

but it's not terrible because it does kind of sound like somebody from the East Coast would have been named in like the 1800s, right? It's funny, because my wife is Asian, and so Fenway, a lot of people think that it's like Fenway or like something Asiany. No, I just, yeah. Like there might be a hyphen in there, but no.

My son's name is George, which- That's as good as it gets. Were you upset with our mail order bride talk earlier today? No, no, no, no. Your fist balled up a little there. I was just gonna like, no, no, no. I do have like same age, but like I'm pretty mid white dude,

pretty hot Asian lady. Nice. And it's pretty great. Well, and then it's not. I mean, listen. Let's hear about that. All your, a common theme over the last few episodes has been how being gay is not gay.

And I'm here to agree with that. I think being in a cis guy-girl relationship is pretty gay. It can be. Dude, it's super gay. Yeah. Not much gay on some days. Other than the regular sex, it's pretty gay. And even that really is.

But it doesn't bother me talking about that. Dan, one time you got my daughter to say you suck, Jub, on the ticket and that made like a commercial drop for a little bit. That was pretty good time in our household and my daughter still like she was pretty excited today like when I woke up this morning she was like happy dumb zone day nice recorded that she was pretty excited that I'm gonna be here so I say hi to my daughter Fenway because eventually I'll show her that clip it's a good name Fenway it is eventually I'll show her that clip. It's a good name, Fenway.

It is a great name. I don't mind telling dad, I don't want to tell him. Hey, kid. Who's watching right now. Hey, kid. Shout out to Ted Emmerich. Ted Emmerich? We met him at my bar.

Same way that we met Wire Will at my bar. I just unintentionally eavesdrop. And after a while, I heard wire will and them talking about dad's group and doing the float and Colleyville and I was like dude are you guys fucking wire will and then you know fucking explosion and then Ted Emmerich was at my bar and I was like checking him out like paying him out and I was like man I don't be paying him out. And I was like, man, I don't wanna be weird, but you got like some serious pipes on you, bro.

Like, what are you, what, I, you sound like Mark Falwell. And he was like, actually, Mark Fowl's a pretty good, Mark Falwell's a pretty great friend of mine. And, you know, I went to UNT for broadcasting and I'm looking at his credit card and I was like, holy fucking shit, are you fucking Ted Emmerich? It's Ted Emmerich card and I was like, Holy fucking shit. Are you fucked dead? It's Ted Emmerich and it was fucking Ted Emmerich and, you know,

made a huge scene about that and went and got Brian real quick and ended up being in his. No, I don't know if it was in your section or anything, but Ted Emmerich, super cool. Super cool. Definitely married up. It's the stories are true. He's, he's I've ever met in my life. Definitely married up. It's, the stories are true. He's a really nice guy. A lot younger than I thought he would be with those pipes.

I get that a lot from friends reacting to Ted as well. Yeah, he's Jack's brat. I do have gifts, and then I don't really have too much other. I was also gonna say, if there's any other reason to come to Winewood, it's that, it's a dumb zone regular hotspot, you know? Yeah, why I will.

You never know who you're gonna see. You had Ted Emmerich? You know Gabriel, the chef for Me-Dia, he's there all the time. Oh, is he really, okay. That's right across the way. Same company. He's there all the time, ownership, yeah.

Okay, nice. He'll certainly come to the bar and I'll whip your ass about. Thumbs up and shit. OK. Make you some great drinks. Best drinks and grapevine, no big deal. Yeah, what about the gifts?

Yeah, gifts. It's like Christmas morning. Give us our shit. Oh, he does a big bag. Did you know they were going to have a guest today? How many gifts did you bring? Oh, shit. It doesn't look like. Did you know they were gonna have a guest today? How many gifts did you bring? Shit it doesn't look like

Okay, it's a bag step aside coffee. This is a job for beer Courage courage I'm not gay but my voice is for Blake shirts. That's, I think the next evolution in run the ball is run the goddamn ball. Solid. So this is a foam finger celebrating Beth's cans. Apparently this is for drop Beth and everybody thinks that's now funny we can just talk about breast cancer like that. And what is this? It's from that movie. Amelie Perez breakdown. That's the shirt that I landed on Blake. Sorry to nut kick you.

Blake's is awesome. A beer helmet. No Viking. Oh that's cool. Underneath there is the tubes and shit if you want to go through. I left them hermetically sealed knowing that you would never, you know, the only chance I'd ever see you drink out of that. There would be zero chance. Now the chance is like up to.05%. I gotta see that. I would actually put a beer in here and drink it. But maybe I will at opening day. Star guy. We're going to opening day on the bus. The Bang Bus.

Okay, so that's an Eagle stand. Can I? There's a boar? I want Blake's shirt. Hold that other shirt back yeah what do you got I don't know where I'm going but I fuck? Okay. I was giving out big giant something. Is that a sword? Do you think it is? Yes. Is that a kendo? Oh, it's a fucking sword.

It's swords. Jake now has a sword. We can hang it on the wall. Dude, I got so worried when that dude a couple of days ago from Denton was like, man, I was gonna get you a sword. So I'd already. Fuck yeah.

Oh, you're upset if somebody else had already brought a sword two days before? Now I see there's like five shovels and a bunch of scissors. So, yeah. That's amazing. Well, if you're listening eight months ago, you know, back then people were sending us groundbreaking stuff and red ribbons and scissors. Oh, I used to go there all the time.

So Blake has a sword as well over there. That's real. So you guys can sword fight. This is insane. Blake has a little eagle stand for it. Our guy with the eagle stand. Oh, he got a stand, oh that's for the sword. Sit right in front. Yeah. Blake's smile. For that he got a stand. Oh, that's for the sword. So right in front. Yeah

Blake smile, I got a sword and I got a gay shirt cool Break that couch some I don't know. Hey, you just got us a couch too. Yeah. Sorry about that. This is a Hattori Hanzo. That's very impressive. All right. Was good fun, Blake. Thank you guys. Thank you. Adios, mofo. We gotta go before this becomes a zoo. Thank you for watching my video. Subscribe and type for my name if you want to watch more of my videos. Fairly snobby dodd. more my barely snobby dog barely snobby dog barely snobby dog drive now hey later barely snobby dog