THE ED MYLETT SHOW - Billionaire CEO Leadership Philosophy w/ David Rubenstein

Episode Date: March 16, 2021

Nobody ever won a Nobel prize hating what they did! David Rubenstein is a BILLIONAIRE businessman, author, show host, and has accomplished more things in his life so far than I could possibly mention! With a net worth of over $3 Billion, he’s the Co-Founder of The Carlyle Group, one of the world’s largest and most successful private investment firms, Chairman of the Boards of Trustees of the John F. Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts, Duke University and the Smithsonian Institution.. just to name a few! I have admired David from afar for many many years and it is an absolute honor to have him on The Ed Mylett Show to share his knowledge with all of us. It’s hard to make money… but even harder to hold on to it! In this interview, David shares insider money management tips and shares his philosophy on how to build sustainable wealth, PLUS he’s revealing the most important thing you can do to hold to your money! We discuss the changing economy, forecast what you should expect in the immediate future, and share our predictions about the next recession. You’ll learn practical methods you can implement to become a great leader in times of crisis in your business, family, and your faith, how to use your potential to create personal happiness, AND David is sharing the top attributes that the greatest leaders of all time have in common. If you want to find financial success, become a great leader, learn how to gain influence, and overall make a HUGE impact on the world, you MUST watch this interview! Please SHARE the Podcast /YouTube channel With as many people as you possibly can. ⁣ ⁣⁣ 👉 SUBSCRIBE TO ED'S YOUTUBE CHANNEL NOW 👈  → → → CONNECT WITH ED MYLETT ON SOCIAL MEDIA: ← ← ← ▶︎ INSTAGRAM ▶︎ FACEBOOK  ▶︎ LINKEDIN ▶︎ TWITTER ▶︎ WEBSITE

This is the Ed Milach Show. Welcome back to Max out everybody. My guest today I have admired from afar for many, many years. It's a very interesting man. When I was doing my due diligence on him, his upbringing surprised me. have admired from afar for many, many years. It's a very interesting man. When I was doing my due diligence on him, his upbringing surprised me. This is a guy who grew up basically in kind of a lower income

area. Dad was a male man. Mom was a homemaker. He ends up going on to estimated net worth as an excess of $3 billion. He's the founder of the Carlisle Group, which is a very well-known private equity firm. I'm doing this research and I'm thinking to myself,

he's got the David Rubenstein show. He's got the CEO of so many different enterprises, the Kennedy Center, the Smithsonian Institute. So I guess David, my first question to you is, when are you gonna get around to finally accomplish something with your life? Okay. Well, the truth is, I'm always trying to do something that's interesting.

And then I find rewarding and hopefully giving back to the country. Just like you, you want to do something in your life that you think is meaningful. So I've been trying to do that for a while. I got lucky later in life and some of the things worked out. Well, I got to tell you one of the things you've done to do that is David's got a book called How to Lead Wisdoms from the world's greatest CEOs and when he says that he's not exaggerating

this book about five years putting together a but sign that behind the scenes interviews everybody you're talking about people like Oprah Winfrey, Phil Knight, Jeff Bezos there's a collection of people in this book that Fauci, you know, you're talking about a collection of people in this book that Fauci, you know, you talk about a collection of people in this book, Richard Branson, the list goes on and on. It's literally a who's who of leaders, regardless of their industry.

It's the greatest collection of people in the leadership side of life that I've ever seen before. But my, the interesting part for me, David, was the beginning about you first. Because I know you like to talk about other people, I do that too, but you're interesting to me. One thing on leadership, which is what we're really going to focus it on today, guys.

And I recommend David's book completely. But one of the things that I've discovered when I work with leaders is many of them never take the time because they're busy and crises are happening. They never actually come up with a clearly defined leadership philosophy of their own. They don't put the time and intentionality in doing so. And you talk about yours in the beginning of the book.

So share with us a little bit about your leadership philosophy that's probably evolved over time. Well, over time, I kind of observed two phenomenon. Phenomenon one is that life is divided into three categories periods early in life when you're kind of getting educated, second, when you're beginning your career and maturing as a professional. And third, when you've kind of read the rewards of what you've done in the second or first part of your life. And it's my observation that leaders in the first part,

the Rhodes Scholars, student body presidents, all American athletes, who we all think in high school or college are the superstars. They often turn out not to be so great in the latter part of life. And the leaders in the world really turn out to be people who weren't so great in the beginning. For example, most of the presidents of the United States would never have been thought to be potential president of the United States when they were in college or high school. The only exception the last 100 years may be Bill Clinton, who was a student leader. So I would think about your own case. You're a well-known personality now. You're a leader in your

areas. I don't know where you are superstar in high school and people say this guy is going to be famous and all that. Not in the least, of course not. Oh, you're exactly right. So I was not, I was you know, not that famous, not that well known. I wasn't a great athlete. I wasn't a great scholar and I got lucky later in life. The second part of what I wanted to say in the book is that there are certain attributes that leaders have. Luck is one of them, but the persistence is another, a hard work is another, the ability to get along with people, communicating with people, sharing the credit, being ethical, and rising to the occasion. These are attributes that I think leaders have in common, some are better than others in certain things. And humility is one that I think is probably good. Clearly,

we've had a president recently who didn't specialize in humility. But as a general rule of thumb, I think people that you tend to admire are people that are somewhat humble about what they've done. I agree. I've come up with this nuance, I think, with leaders that I admire. And by the way, I don't know that the president before him was necessarily dozed in humility all the time, either. And the reason I say that to you is, and by the way, I'm non-political in that regard.

I want you to, I don't know if anyone's actually this before, but I observe, and some of these people in the book, I've actually got to know myself a little bit. There's this interesting combination because humility is so requisite, but it's almost combined. It's an odd nuance of a lot of confidence combined with humility. It's this road they almost seem to tow.

That's very unique. I think of the former president that way. I think of Phil Knight that way. Bill Gates who's in the book. There's a tremendous amount of confidence combined with humility. Do you notice that as well? Yes, I picked up this in some sense. You're too young to remember this, but there was a

president, John Kennedy. Sure. For him. He did was something very novel. He would have every other week a press conference at the State Department and answering questions from anybody and a reporter. And he had a enormous amount of self-deprecating humor. He was able to make fun of himself. Why was he able to do that? Because he had a lot of self-confidence. If you're insecure, you can't make fun of yourself. If you have enormous confidence in what your

abilities are, you can make fun of yourself. And you'll find a lot of the leaders that once you've referred to or once in the book, they have so much confidence in what they've achieved that they can make fun of themselves and their humble because they know they had a lot of luck along the way. People that are insecure very often cannot make fun of themselves and are not able to be humble. Hmm.

What do you think of? Wow, that's really interesting because there are accomplishments that's given them some of this. What about the idea of, when I say this to young curious who comes to mind, emotional maturity. That's one of the things that I've observed with the leaders that I admire the most that I've

worked with in different businesses I've been involved with is that under crisis, they're emotionally mature, they're composed. And when things are going very well, they don't seem to get too high. I think of like almost a billbellic check type person in football. There's this almost emotional, stoic maturity about them that I think gives a calm to the people that they lead. Do you think of anybody when I say that and do you agree? I do. I mean, remember, people that are well adjusted recognize that a football game or a sporting

event or a television show isn't the most important thing in the world. There's so many other more important things. So they're not going to get panic over whether they want a football game or not. They might be upset if they lost, but they're not going to make it the most important thing in their life because all of us recognize are more important things in life. And as I'd like to say in my book and other times I've said, the most important thing in life and the most elusive thing in life is personal happiness. Very hard to get.

Now if you are happy, you can be happy in many different ways. You can be happy having a family and you're not famous. You can be happy with having fame. But it's hard to achieve it. And once you achieve it, you know, it gives you a certain serenity because you know you're not happy with life. Now, as you probably know, you know a lot of prominent people. How many of

them are tortured souls and they're not that happy with what they're doing, even though they might be famous. I see a lot of those wealthy and famous people who are tortured. They're not that happy. I got to tell you, as you were

saying that, that's what I was thinking. I was thinking of those folks and sometimes I almost, I don't know, I think in general human struggle with happiness is one of the things I talk a lot about, but I think there's sometimes these mega achievers, there's an extra dose of it because I think they thought all their life once I get to this destination, once I get a certain amount of money or the title of CEO or my own television show or I do get elected to office or I win a Super Bowl, that then I'll be happy.

And these destinations and achievements aren't what make us internally happy. So I actually see it maybe even more prominently in achievers than I do with everyday people. Is that crazy? Yes, because achievers are always thinking that you've got to have somebody on the outside telling them that they've done a great job

and that's going to make them happy. They then realize later they might be inside not that happy even though they're outside, thought to be happy because they're very famous. The happiest people I know are very often blue collar workers, people with very good families, people with nice family life, people who are not famous, but they're happy.

I agree, and I might philosophy behind that since we're talking about it and we're gonna go into some leadership specifics here in a second, because you go five years interviewing the people you interview, President Bush and everybody else. We're going to pick some nuggets out of there. But one of the things that I think creates happiness is when your life conditions match up to the blueprint or the vision you have for it.

So oftentimes when you live a little bit more of a simple life, if that's what your blueprint was for what you wanted or your expectations and the conditions match if that equals happiness, one of the things all the achievers listeners need to be very leery of is, if you're constantly throwing it out there and your current life, it's healthy because it causes you to grow,

but it can be unhealthy in terms of bliss and happiness when your current life conditions don't match the blueprint or the vision you have for it. That lack of congruency sometimes causes people to be unhappy. Would you agree? I agree. And you know, a sad situation you we find now is that you see people at all ages committing suicide at a higher rate than we've seen in generations.

Why is that? Somebody is 25 years old and kills himself or herself. How can you explain that other than they don't have personal happiness? Mm-hmm. And I think also the advent of social media has led people to have these just really unrealistic expectations what they should look like with,

it seems like everybody's having a party every single day and you're at home and everyone has 500 friends and you have two and one of them's given you some hate on your social media account. And I think it's that blueprint not equaling your current life conditions. I really do. Well, in my case, I'm not on any social media because I'm going to be embarrassed that Instagram would announce I have three followers. So, you know, him Kardashian has 80 million followers. I have three. So I don't want anybody know how few followers I would have. So I don't have those accounts. Yeah, he also has one of the most prominent television shows on the planet to on Bloomberg

So don't let him fool you but when I was research him thinking he doesn't have so I didn't think you'd have Instagram I got to I thought you'd have a Twitter. I thought you'd have Twitter for sure and I was surprised by that I don't have it because my my staff people think I wouldn't have to do it or I've watched though that some people that have Twitter people think I wouldn't have to do it. Or I've watched though that some people that have Twitter sometimes say things they regret later on. You know, it's tempting to say something and all of a sudden you realize 10 minutes later you shouldn't have said it.

I've thought about trying to learn how to do it and maybe now that there's an account open with 72 million followers, maybe I could get that account. I just buy it, that's a good idea. You can afford it. I was go through some practices of great leaders. I mean, guys, I've never seen a collection. It reminds me of almost Andrew Carnegie

back in the day or Napoleon Hill where they did all this research of these very prominent people. Yet there's really not been anything written that way since that time. And this is the first leadership book I've read. We're thinking of myself, General Padreas, Condoleezer Rice, Jack Nicholas.

I mean, it's just an amazing collection of conversations. Well, thank you. I did these on my TV show over about a four or five year period of time. It takes a lot of line them up, and I generally have known these people for a while, so it makes the conversation easier, rather than just showing up and interviewing somebody you haven't known. It makes it work better a bit, and I enjoy doing it. It's not a skill that I realized I had. I never was a professional interviewer, and maybe you weren't a professional interviewer when you were younger, but you realize you have a skill in this area, people like it, and people think that the way I do it works out as well. But I didn't go to school to learn how to do

this, nor to do. You have two things that I watch in great leaders, and, and I don't know you personally, but just, you know, from a distance observing you, and I don't know you personally, but just you know, from a distance observing you. And I think also makes you a great interview. You're one you're incredibly curious. You're genuinely interested. And then two, you have that combination of confidence and humility enough that you're really learning as you're asking the question. So like I am today, I was preparing for a lot of interviews. And last night as I was even doing a little bit more preparation, I was just really excited about this. I was your team had reached out to us and I thought this is going to be really something else. And so I just want to let you know that's an honor to be doing this with you.

But I'm reading. I'm going to mispronounce her name. Let's go through some tactics. Thank you. All right. And I'm mispronounce her name. It's the PepsiCo CEO. Is it Indra Nui? Indra Nui, unbelievable woman. And one of the things she does, I'd like you to share with her is these letters because I want leaders

listen, what can I do to build relationships more connectivity, uh, create culture. And she is this great strategy that seems very simple, but it's almost nobody takes the time to do this. So please share one. Here's her technique that she used quite, quite well. She would write letters, report cards, she would call them, to the parents of her senior employees. So let's suppose you're the mother of a senior person at Pepsi. You get a letter from the CEO saying, your child is going a wonderful job. You did a terrific job of raising this person. I really hope this person stays here a long time. Well, the mother will then call the child and say, you have a wonderful boss. Look how attentive she is to you. And by the way, you're doing a good job. That makes the employee even more loyal to the CEO because if your mother thinks the person is good, how are you going to tell your mother you're quitting the job because the CEO is so wonderful.

So it really worked and it was a good way to actually connect with the employees as well as with the parents. I agree. One of the things I do is I write personal letters still because everybody gets email and text and just you think about the last time you get it. By the way, and my penmanship is horrific, but I still do. I think that personalizes me, humanizes me. Although it's like a barely right, but I write them to the children of the people that I work with because those ultimately end up going up on refrigerators and it stays in their home and it reminds them of those things too.

So just for what that's worth, everybody, it's another kind of tactic that's in the book. And we don't only go through the whole book because I want you to get the book everybody. But what about crisis right now? Let's be honest, you talk about the former president, now there's president Biden. But anybody who's in a leadership position right now, even a leader in a family,

or all the way up to the CEO of being a company at the same time, there's a lot of stress right now. This is a time in leading through crisis. Anything you've learned from these leaders of going through a crisis type time that you would share with leaders of families, of businesses, of any enterprise right now. Well, that nobody has all the answers, that you've got to listen to other people. Oprah Winfrey in the interview said, she's not a great interviewer, she's a great listener. And when you're a leader, you have to listen to what your troops are telling you, your employees are telling you.

So I think many of the people that I've interviewed, they got ideas and get ideas from people that work with them and they listen to those people. And I think that's a good thing. You can't think you have all the answers yourself. Today, we're living in a crisis where there are no perfect answers, but you've got to talk to people about what they're doing. How are you getting through the day on COVID? How are you working?

How are you dealing with your children? Getting answers from people that have similar situations can be very helpful. What about getting there as a leader is opposed to staying there? It's one of the things that's talked about a little bit because I have more friends that used to be wealthy than currently are, and I have more friends

that used to be leading something than currently are leading something. That's a very unique skill set. Right. Well, everybody works very hard to get somewhere. And then when you get there, sometimes you forget the things that got you there. You could get your ego could get bigger. You don't pay attention to people. You're not listening to your troops anymore, or you're spending time on things that aren't that relevant to your job. You're spending too much time at parties rather than running the company or whatever the organization might be. In terms of wealth, there's no doubt that one of the hardest things is to make money, but it's even harder to hold onto it when you have it.

Because sometimes when you make the money, you think I'm a genius and I can keep making money, and sometimes it's not that easy to keep making it and they take risks that are too risky for you and therefore you can lose money. And it's always a sad situation to see somebody was wealthy who made it honestly and then bad luck or whatever, bad fortune he or she lost it and they're back to a situation that finds them very unhappy. You're so right, I find that there's a certain discipline in saving enough money to get wealthy. It's an entirely different discipline to hold on to the pile once you get it and continue to grow it and not have the temptation to blow it as I see so many people do. I tell you, here's when I tell people a lot when I give a talk on money management.

Many people are good at making money in given area A. When they make the money, they think they're a genius in area B, C, and D and they start doing doing B, C, and D, and they're not good at that. And the result is they have no money at the end. But if you have money, the most important thing is not to lose what you have. And therefore you don't take undue risk. Everybody's not George Sordos or Warren Buffett. And don't think you are just because you've got lucky in one area of life. Oh my gosh, where were you when I was 30 years old? My father would say that my father was a working man, a brilliant man, but not a rich man. And my dad would say to me, the same thing you just said, and he said to me, will you please stop investing in things you can't even explain to me that you don't understand.

If you can't explain it in a sense or two, you shouldn't put your money in it. That's true. Albert Einstein used to say that you don't understand. If you can't explain it in a sense or two, you shouldn't put your money in it. That's true. Albert Einstein used to say, if you can't explain in one or two sentences what you're talking about, you really don't understand it. Boy, I'm down to like three topics then.

Right. Let me ask you, since we're on this, and we'll go back to leadership in a second, but I can't have somebody that's accomplished what you have in the area of accumulating wealth without asking you this. It's been a long time since we've been in a recession. And I've had this notion of not losing money, believe me, sometimes I wonder if I'm a real entrepreneur because I'm not a risk taker. I'm not one of these people that willing to really risk it all. I'm a kind of afraid of being broke still.

And I've had this feeling that a recession is coming for a long time. I look around the world. I think it's got to come here eventually. And then I thought, well, maybe when the election changes and regulations get tighter now that Biden's in and maybe tax rates are going to go up on corporations that now's the time. I'm just curious. You are feeling about a pending recession, the possibility of it, the timing of it, etc. Nobody is really skilled at predicting when a recession is going to occur. You can take the best economists in the world and they will always say, well, it could happen and might not happen I don't really know. Then when it happens, they will bring a memo out of the file saying, see, I told you this, but they didn't really tell you that. Yeah.

They're very good at predicting the recession that actually occurred, not the one that's going to occur. So I think right now, the biggest economic problems we all have to worry about are that COVID is getting still to be a very significant problem. And it's really weighing down the economy. But that isn't the biggest problem. The biggest problem is, and of course, vaccinations have to occur and all that,

but the biggest problem of the economy is that the poorer people and the people at the bottom are going further and further down, and those at the top are getting further and further wealthier. In other words, the divide is becoming greater than it's ever been. If you are self-employed, you're working a food truck,

you're a blue collar worker, you work with your hands, you probably are not in great shape. If you're a financial executive, if you're in the healthcare business, if you're in some business that's the technology related, you're probably doing very well. In fact, in my own business, private equity, if you didn't know we were in COVID,

it almost wouldn't make a difference because we're doing things over Zoom and deals are getting done, finance and so forth, exits are occurring. It's the people at the bottom that are really suffering and they're gonna fall further and further behind. And that is really gonna weigh down the U.S. economy because when you have an underclass

that isn't able to get out of the underclass, it drags the whole economy down at some point. What do you do about it? Because the world is changing. And I think, I think COVID almost in some senses sped with the inevitable up by 10 years in terms of the way people do business. And so you're an owner of a whole bunch

of commercial office buildings, your world's changing now. More and more people. Now the upside is we're entering a spaceless economy, right? You can now recruit and train and develop people. And I think it's occurring to more and more people. Now the upside is we're entering a spaceless economy, right? You can now recruit and train and develop people and I think it's occurring to more and more people that my pool of candidates isn't within 25 minutes of my office or my home anymore. But for these folks that are at the lower or middle end of the economy, in some senses, we're raising the minimum wage. Well, more and more places are saying,

well, we're going to do that. I can have a machine check somebody out at the grocery store, not a human being. So what would you say is the solution to this? If I'm someone working in these careers or if I'm leading the economy, I mean, you, you're very humble, but you've accumulated a fortune and you've done really well for other people as well. So what would your answer to that be? answer to that be. You should recognize that the industrial revolution took about a hundred years to change the way we work and live and then the internet may be 25 years smart phones maybe 10 years. COVID has changed everything in one year in one year. We have gone from working in the offices or working in other places to working out of our home through to being the pendant on computers and so forth. So if you are a person that wants to stay alive and financially and do well, you have to be computer literate, you have to have access to high-speed internet data, you have to be prepared to retool yourself. So if you were working in a food truck and that's all your skill was, you probably have to retool

yourself and people have to go back and get education, vocational education, or other kinds of way to retool themselves because it's now a situation where you could be left behind and you're never going to catch up again if you don't take advantage of the situation that you now find yourself in, which is you have some time to learn something new, you got to adapt, you got to change, and you know I've changed what I'm doing and I assume you've changed what you're doing. I'm in my home 90% of the time now, and so I've had to learn how to work differently. Certainly the interviews are different. It's just not the same as being with somebody in person and feeling their energy and their spirit. Absolutely. Completely different.

Yeah, it's very, very different that way. With that in mind, you know, I've always had this struggle as a leader. I love people. And so I get really close to people that I lead. I love them. I think one of the great qualities of a leader is that you genuinely love Karen, believe in people, and you're very connected to what their actual giftedness or their superpowers are. Having said that, that's hurt me sometimes, where people have gotten close and hurt me, or potentially we've gotten so close, I don't have that, I don't know if you call it moral authority, or leverage, so to speak as a leader. And there's these two camps don't get too close to people get as close as you can to them as a leader.

What where do you stand on that? Well, different leadership styles. George Washington never was close to anybody, but an effective leader. I would say other people are political leaders and they are close to people and they really like people. And you know, they're different types of political leaders and they are close to people and they really like people. And, you know, they're different types of political leaders. I would say you have to have a certain distance from the people that you are leading because if you're so familiar, you can't fire them. You can't really tell them correctly what they should do because you're too close.

It's personally too difficult. On the other hand, if you're so distance from them, you don't feel what they're really feeling and they don't may not want to follow you. You can't be a leader without followers. So you have to do some things that want to make people follow you. But if you're so close to them, they feel that you're one of them, they may not really want to listen to you as much as they should if you have a little distance from them. This is so interesting to me. I want to ask you a question. This is going to seem like the oddest thing, but I feel like people want to know this stuff.

I have the benefit of this as some extra, but not to the extent that you do. You're in some cool rooms with some really interesting people. Jamie Dimons, a guy I've been fascinated by for a long time, and he's part of her book and part of your conversations. What's it like? In other words, is it what we would think it would be if you're in some private conversation with Jamie Diamond or Oprah Winfrey? Is it different than if you're at the coffee shop, talk into a regular everyday? I think most people would love to be a fly on the wall or be in some of these rooms or cocktail parties you're a part of. And I know that's not a normal question you would get in an interview, but I'm really curious as to how you would describe it. Is it intimidating?

Is it impressive? Or is it just like any other gathering you'd be at? Well, if you've never been to the White House, for example, and all of a sudden you go to the White House and there are three presidents in the United States sitting in the Oval Office talking, you're probably going to be intimidated. But if you've worked in the White House

or you've known these presidents, it's not quite as intimidating. Everybody that you meet, no matter how famous they might be, they have some insecurities, they have some uncertainties about what they're doing. And so I don't think it's that all, you know, not that all struck, but I have to be honest, I am now at 71 years old.

I've been around for a while. If I was 27 years old, as I was when I started the White House, I'd probably be more intimidated than I am today when I meet these people because I realize these are people that, you know, put their pants on one leg at a time like most people, or man, I should say. And so I, I'm not as intimidated by them, but I'm sure if there are some people, I would be intimidated by that I just haven't met before. And I probably might be, you know, gulping a bit if I had to go meet, I've never met the queen of England. I haven't met the current Pope. You know, I said, if you meet these people, I suppose you want to make sure you're on your best behavior. I asked that because I get asked it and there's been times

where I've met people that impressed me to an extent that I didn't expect. But by and large, I've been struck by what you just said. People's insecurities, their humanity, and that there was some luck, but also they've got a couple unique superpowers that they've no pun intended, sort of maxed out in their chosen career that makes them special. But one of the things I've noticed about you,

I think one of your superpowers and maybe you could teach everybody listening to this if you're conscious of how you do it. You have a unique ability to connect with people and you have a unique ability to connect with very successful people. And I'm wondering what that is because not everybody, in fact, almost nobody has that to the extent that you do. The collection of people that have been around you, and I know your show's helped with that, but these people seem to really respect and admire you and have a connection with you that's respectful. They respect you. And I'm curious

at 27, all the way to 71, what were some of the skills you think you have or habits that help you connect with people? Because everybody wants to connect with a higher identity person to bring it to their business, to bring it to their life, to mentor them, et cetera. How have you done that? And don't be humble, really tell me. I try to work hard so I know what I'm doing. I'm generally prepared. My former partner, Jim Baker, said that the key lesson in life is prior preparation prevents poor performance. So be prepared.

I try to be prepared, try to be well read. I try not to say something that's going to embarrass me or somebody else. Try to be friendly with people and try to respect what they've done, but also people like to talk about themselves in terms of their youth and their childhood and their parents and so forth. And so I try to engage in that part of the conversation

and kind of loosen people up a little bit so that they feel it's not just a business related kind of interview, I also try to use humor a bit. I think typically self-deprecating humor is more effective. If you make jokes about other people, it's not as effective, but I try to interspersed humor for a while to break up the interviews a little bit. I am generally knowledgeable about the people because I've met them before. It's hard to do an interview if you've never met somebody before and make it the same as if you've met them many years ago.

I gotta say two things about that and then I've got one more question for you. I just want to acknowledge something that you said because for me, when I know I'm in the presence of a confident person and you've said this twice, one very big telltale sign is their self deprecating. It's immediate. When I see someone sort of poke fun at themselves, I think, well, behind that is some sense of confidence and accomplishment. And it's just a very endearing thing. And so I, I, it's a huge thing. I'll let you comment on that.

And then the second thing is people's favorite topic is themselves, everybody. One of my favorite things is after a round and golf, if I played golf with somebody, and they'll find a mutual friend and might say, I really like it. And then they'll say, what does he do? Because I spent the entire four and a half hours talking about what they do and their life and their experience

and we'll get around to me eventually. So do you agree? Those are two just very significant things. Well, the most commonly used word in the English language is I because people's favorite subject is themselves. So if you can engage in people and listen to them and not talk only about yourself, they will be more engaged and they're happy to talk about themselves. So that's that's a no doubt a factor. Also, I would say when I was younger working in the White House or so forth, I didn't have the confidence I do now.

If you've gone out and made a fair amount of money in the business world, you have a lot of positions that people respect, you have more self-confidence. So I have much more confidence than I did 30, 40 years ago. If I was doing interviewing 34 years ago, I would probably have been fired after the first interview because I didn't have the confidence I do than now that I did have now. So it takes a while. I told you one question, but I wanted advice is the last one. But what are these people? You said it in the beginning, but what in the world does Jack Nicholas have in common with Bill Gates that hasn't common with Oprah Winfrey that they share with Richard

Branson? In other words, as I look at all these people, some of them have big visions, but not all of them. Some of them, I think, have really high IQs, but not all of them. What are the similarities, I guess, is the question between these people that seem to me to be so different in terms of personality, and even their outlook on life? In the end, if I had to summarize anything, it's that people who become leaders in different ones you mentioned or examples of it, they had a vision of what they wanted to do.

They wanted to be a great golfer. They wanted to build a great company. They wanted to become a well-known television person. They pursued it even though people told them they probably wouldn't be successful. So persistence, persistence, persistence, not arrogance, but persistence. It pays off. You don't have to be at the highest IQ in the world to be successful. In fact, I don't like the higher geniuses because they're impossible to manage.

You want to hire people that reason the intelligent, but people who work harder or better than people are geniuses. So true. All right. Last question. By the way, I've enjoyed today so much. Everybody here's the deal. Just go get David's book. I'm just going to.

It's there's no collection like it anywhere. I've named so many of the people, but then there's, there's a whole others in there too. They're just it's just an amazing life. And I think you've had one of the most interesting and fascinating lives of anybody that I've ever met before. And you know, you're in the middle of it. So it probably doesn't occur to you just how spectacular it's been. Well, the next book I'm going to interview you and that'll be in my next book. Okay, how about that? I would love that and we'll sell five copies but you know I know my mom would love to read it David and so we can at least get that. I'm in the

middle of writing one right now I'll talk to you to have a me on your show when it comes out. I would like to conclude with before you ask your final question you mentioned your mother. Right? Yes. So one of the most important things I think is for people that are successful to honor their parents for having helped them get there. And very often people forget that. And so I like to remind people that it's very difficult to honor your parents when they're not around.

Bear Bryant was a Alabama football coach and he did a famous AT&T commercial on Mother's Day saying, please call your mother today. I can't. My mother's passed away. So try to do something on to your parents while they're alive and they can take pride in what you achieve. I assume you've done that. I try to do it. I should have done more. I should have as well. My dad passed away just a few weeks ago. And I think I did that when he was here, but even if you've lost somebody, one of the things that's funny, amazing that amazing that you're used to word honor because I said this last week on the show, David, I said, one of the things I just have a deeper commitment

to honor my dad with the rest of the life that I live. And it just kind of gives you a true north that gives you a compass, it gives you some inspiration that maybe you otherwise wouldn't have without doing that. So thank you for that. I'm really glad you said that. And I made a mistake with my father. I should say, he, you know, he was proud of what I'd done. And he was a simple blue collar worker, very proud. But he, I didn't really do anything to honor him in a way other than just doing what I did.

When he passed away, I redid the Iwo Jima Memorial. He had been a Marine. And in his honor, I kind of made the Iwo Jima Memorial, which is an honor of Marines, better than had been a Marine and in his honor I kind of made the E. would even more which is an honor of Marines better than had been and I wish I had done that while it was alive. Well, well, that's quite an honor after he had passed away. I'm really glad you said that. I've been reflecting on that too. Did I call my dad enough? Did I see him enough? Did I tell him I loved him enough? You know, yeah, I should have done more. You know, and anybody who's got living

parents, I'm really glad he said it's a beautiful thing to say because the most important role as a leader is in our own families. That's what really matters. That's one of the things I loved about my father is he understood that far better than I have. Right. And when my mother did pass away a few years ago, as well, I went through all of her materials and she had scrapbooks, not of my business successes or anything, but of the money that I've given away. And she always told me that she was more proud of my giving away the money than making the money. And that was reflecting the scrapbook she kept. She kept no scrapbooks about my business or anything, just my philanthropy. So that made me feel

that I'd done something that she was happy about. That's beautiful. That's wonderful. And my mom and dad would be the same way. And here's what's interesting. I'll bet the vast majority of people driving right now on the treadmill or watch this on YouTube or not even thinking that's what would make my mom and dad proud. And so if that's the case, then then start to do those things. Start to take it more seriously because, you know, David's lost his parents. I just lost mine and these times aren't given or promised and honor your children, honor your spouse, make that part of who you are. And so I got to tell you the more you read about David you know you're going to realize what I've told you is true. He's lived this just remarkable life and he's talked about his parents. I'll be candid with you David when I When I've watched you on television, just because of your presence in the way you talk,

I thought, this dude's a blue blood. I just figured this guy just is bent around this. I wonder who his dad was, you know, because you just know everybody, you've accomplished so much, you've accumulated this tremendous net worth and the influence you've had, the difference you've made, I just sort of figured this guy grew up connected. And then when I read about your upbringing, I fell in love with

you. I'm like, this man's remarkable. And so the vast majority of people that are listening to this or watching it grew up like you and I did. Right. And they've got a dream they want to make come true. They may not have been completely clear on what it is, but anyone listening to my show, here's what I can tell you about them, you're asking us about the audience, their dreamers. They wouldn't be taking this 45 minutes to an hour with you and I, if they didn't want to make their life better.

And they're ahead of 99.9% of the people in the world because they're actually at least investing this time to try to improve. As you know, most people just give lip service to it. What council advice would you give to somebody with your vast experience? Lastly, who's sitting there going, you know, David, I want to be somebody. I want to accomplish something. I want to honor my family. And I'm lost. COVID's got me even before COVID. I'm not so sure I had my act together completely. And I want

to change my life regardless of their age. And they can run into you at that Starbucks, I talked about earlier, instead of one of these high end parties, what would you say to them would be your best advice? Nobody ever want a Nobel Prize hating what they did. You have to find something in life you enjoy, experiment, find something you love doing. If you love doing it ultimately,

you'll probably be good at it. If you work at it and you persist. And remember, the most important thing in life is not having money or not having fame. It is finding something that makes you happy. And the best way to be happy is ultimately pleasing other people and helping other people. And so I try to remind people,

you should figure out what are you doing on the face of the earth, how are you making the earth slightly better than the place you were born into? And try to do something other than your career to give back to society and give back to our country. And that'll make you happy in my view. Beautiful. David, I enjoyed today so much.

I'm really honored to have made your acquaintance and I consider you a friend now. Thank you. Thank you. Thanks very much. I won't get to know you better because if you got to know me, you might not think I'm as good as you now think. So I don't think I'm as good as you think. But thanks very much. I won't get to know you better because if you got to know me, you might not think I'm as good as you now think so I I don't think I'm as good as you think, but thanks very much. There's the humility again everybody. Please get David's book We're gonna put it up on the screen here and make sure you share this program

You don't get access to people like David Rubenstein every single day everybody But you can get access to him on max out thanks to his team for you very much and god bless you. God bless you. All right, pleasure. Thanks a lot. Appreciate it. Bye. This is the end mileage show. you