THE ED MYLETT SHOW - Build Unbreakable Mental Health w/ Jay Glazer

Episode Date: February 8, 2022

This week, we’re going to talk a lot about an important subject that demands much more attention in times like these.   That subject is Mental health and depression They are definitely varying degrees of the spectrum of depression.   And if you’ve ever suffered from it, or know someone who has, you know just how misunderstood and difficult that MENTAL HEALTH JOURNEY is. My guest, JAY GLAZER, has been a fixture on Fox Network National Football League broadcasts for almost two decades now.  He’s also appeared on several TV shows, including HBO’s Ballers, The League on FX and as an announcer for UFC and Bellator broadcasts. He’s also been very public about his overwhelming battles with anxiety and depression, SHARING HIS STRUGGLES OF “LIVING IN THE GRAY” for all the world to see. I wanted to share his story with you because instead of letting painful depression consume him, JAY FOUGHT BACK.   He crawled out from underneath those dark shadows and CHANNELED HIS ENERGY into productive and positive projects, including opening the Unbreakable Performance Center in West Hollywood a few years ago.It has become a training home to many ELITE ATHLETES AND PERFORMERS including Sylvester Stallone, Michael Strahan, Chuck Liddell, Wiz Khalifa, Chris Pratt, Demi Lovato, and many others.  An offshoot of that, Jay has also trained more than 1,000 NFL players in mixed martial arts during their off-seasons. But his most IMPORTANT LIFE’S WORK was the creation of a non-profit called MVP, MERGING VETS & PLAYERS, which matches former combat veterans and former pro athletes to help each other through the difficult transition into their new lives away from the battlefields and playing fields.   While Jay goes into detail about his heavy battles with depression, he also gives you UNBREAKABLE MINDSET STRATEGIES he used to fight that battle that you can apply in your life as well. I know there are many of you out there struggling with depression on your own, afraid or unable to reach out because you’re wallowing in mental quicksand. You’d be surprised at how many stories I hear that are just like that. If you’re one of those people or know somebody fighting that battle right now, listen to Jay’s story and how he’s BEAT THOSE DEMONS. There are people who care about you, and by listening to this week’s podcast, I hope you’ll realize that YOU ARE LOVED and you are WORTHY of getting the help you need.

This is the end my let's show. All right, welcome back to the program everybody. I feel like today could be one of the more important shows we've ever done. Just because of the time in our culture and the courageous nature of my guest. It's an interesting guy. I met Jay a long time ago. I actually met him in a gym in the Bahamas and we've got a bunch of really good mutual friends and I wanted to have Jay on the show back then because of who he is.

He's in the NFL insider on Fox sports and on Fox NFL Sunday. He's probably got one of the top five or 10 roller dexes on the planet between athletes, entertainers, you name it. He's one of the most connected people on the planet. He's got foundation work. He does charity work with a thing he founded called MVP, which is merging vets and players. He's got unbreakable performance, which is his training facility. He's just a super really interesting connected guy. But then lately he's been talking more about what we're going to talk about today, mainly, which is mental health and sort of his his battle with mental health and his is trying to conquer it. So Jay Glazer, thank you for being here today, brother.

Absolutely, brother. Thank you for having me, man. You're right. You know, I got to work out and, uh, I mean, how funny is that? You know, the universe, it's hard to help us. We're in a gym in the Bahamas.

And there you are. And I know you're trying to get me on the show there, who, you know, unbreakable what I've done. And, uh, it was just, yeah, it was just, that was a, that was a while ago. Actually, I was down there with an ex girlfriend now, but my son and a little kid named Logan. Okay.

And Logan, I introduced you, right? Yeah. So, do you remember, I told you a story or not? You didn't, you just introduced me, but you didn't tell me that. So Logan, Nobriga's his name. Logan got leukemia when he was, I think, three until he was six. Wow. And then beatmia when he was I think three until he was six.

Wow. And then beat it. And then it came back when he was six and a half. And wow. Then I used to have another friend, H. Colt Touchdown dream, because I met him, but he became like my dude. I was like, I'm going to walk this walk with this kid. You know, forever, however long it is. Well, he ends up beating leukemia again for second time. Thank God. He kind of became the welcoming party at UCLA Children's Hospital. Wow. And what happened was in front of the day he got his pork taken out. And he just goes to show you like people want to do good things.

Yes. He goes up to UCLA with a Rob Grinkowski jersey. And I call Grant, I'm like, hey dude, are you in LA? Like you got to come over here right now with Jim. Come breakable. I got to tell him a story and he's like, I'll be right over. Like, it's just incredible. And I call Logan, I was like, hey Logan, where are you?

I haven't seen your report card. I can't start jumping all over. Where are you? And Logan and his mom, Kierce is like, well, you better get up there. So he gets up to the gym and he walks in and he sees Gronk and he goes, and he goes, wait, so am I in trouble? We're like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no the crazier part, and this is like in the book, I talk a lot about this,

but you just never know what lies where I'm next Tuesday. And I brought them into an MVP session, which is, you know, we had about 90 combat vets and former pro athletes together, all in the map talking mental health. And I said Logan, now, the way MVP came about was Logan's grandmother, who was a, her

name Susie, who was a, she was a, a therapist for a lot of, a lot of these veterans. So it was kind of their idea. Oh, way. And yeah, to, to, like, let's put your football player friends who's struggling to get over these events that see if it works. And it was their idea. And here we are with 90 combat vets, many of who attempted suicide before meeting us

and now are just doing great and living their best lives. And said Logan, I know it sucks that you had leukemia. I totally not like I get it. But if you didn't, we wouldn't have started this charity. Wow. And I said, if we didn't start this charity, show a hands right now. How many people wouldn't be here right now? Oh my gosh. And a lot of hands go up in the room. Did they really? And then somebody else said, let's take a step further.

If we didn't have MVP, how many of us wouldn't be where we are right now in life. And 90 of the 90 hands go up. And then they started saying, Logan, my name is Denver Morris. He's worked for me now, but he said, I had he's lost 51 of his teammates to suicide. He lost a lot in Iraq and Afghanistan and you know, call the five to me. He said, I have attempted to decide three times. So MVP saved my life. So Logan, thank you for saving my life. Oh my gosh, brother. That's incredible. I'm sorry.

I'm coming out of the gate, top of your man, but it's so good. I mean, so that little kid that you met, that was his first trip after. And then the whole room started going around. Logan, I'm such a tough, thank you for saving my life. And he turns and he looks at me and goes, I don't realize that I did all this. I said, more or no, like your fight to come through the fact that leukemia didn't break you is now saving thousands and thousands of lots. And it does help you out.

But Logan, thank you for saving all of us. Bro, that's bananas. And I can't believe that I met that little guy with you. And you said about breaking, I got, I got to share this everybody. We've done shows on mental health before, but I, you know, an expert here or there. Never had someone on who's a well-known, very well-known person who's dealing with it currently in real time. This is why what you're doing right now, bro, even what you've done with Logan and what you've done with MVP and you just make a difference in the world. But I think maybe, you know, he had

not had leukemia. The foundation doesn't start. You don't save those guys. I just feel like maybe your mental health struggle. Had you not had that, there may be millions of other people. It's including today whose lives may end or be really negatively impacted by not getting some help.

So if you guys don't know this, follow Jay on Instagram or Twitter wherever on any socials. But he's sort of right now like live saying, hey, here's my mental health checkup today. I'm doing good. I'm not doing good. And he wrote this book that if you have mental health issues or you know anybody who does,

which is every single one of us, by the way. Especially today, especially today. It's called Unbreakable, how I turn my depression and anxiety into motivation and you can too. And there's the cover he's showing for the YouTube folks right now. It takes a lot of courage to do what you're doing brother.

And so I want to kind of get into it if we could because, you know, I feel like I have a little of the gray. I think there's extremes of everything in life, right? There's degrees, there's spectrums, but you describe like living in the gray. What is the gray? I don't know life outside of it. That is the crappy part for me. Like, listen, if you're looking at, oh my God, your life is so it. That is the crappy part for me. Like, listen, people looking at me,

oh my God, your life is so great. And damn right it is, my life is great, but not between my ears. My life sucks between my ears. And I keep sharing like my, my wallet's not an antidepressant. I can't pay my bills better now. Yeah, absolutely.

But it does not, it's not rainbows and unicorns when you have the mental health or mental illnesses that I have. I have my gray is depression and anxiety and it's my earliest childhood memories. I don't know any other way. And the book is, you know, the book is titled, Unbreakable How I Turn My Depression and Anxiety Into Motivation. And you can too.

I don't allow it to keep me in bed. It is crippling. My level of gray is crippling. Every day, like it sucks having this. It's painful. It sucks. And you know, I was telling straight hand the other day, I said, you know, you all have known about my, you know, my crazy for a long time, but you just didn't know what pain I was in all these years. You know, and that's why I lashed out a lot. And that's why I had, I'm not perfect. I'm flawed. I'm gonna have to have human beings on. So am I. Hey, and, but I'm a, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm f***ed up, but I'm good with my f***ing up this. But you, when it hits you, this is what struck me. By the way, it's an unbelievable book.

What's that? I don't know when it's gonna hit. Like, that's the problem. Like, I don't know who I'm gonna get every day when I wake up. And even so, like, I could wake up in the morning and the sky is just falling for no reason. And a lot of it, and I talk about the motivation. I don't feel worthy of being loved. And I don't, I don't know what it's like to love myself from the inside out. Like, I don't know what that's like. And I'm working on it, man. I'm like, I'm working.

So as a result, I've had to work so hard to do all these great things to get love from the outside end. Yes. And that's the motivation part. Like, if I didn't, like, I don't know if there's anything as a crutch. And, like, like, I've been hitting the head a lot, right?

So I've trained all these MMA fighters and football players for years, and I've had a couple a couple fights myself and I'm not a good fighter, but I've done it. When you're a crappy fighter like me, you get hit in awful lot more. And I've had a lot of back injuries, a lot of surgeries because a Randy Couture, Chuck Lidell, because they're full training partners. But when I walk in a room, instead of like, oh man, the sucks, I'm missing my L405, because it's ruptured four times. And I don't walk in a room,

well this sucks, but we're men, I'm forgetting these people's names. So this sucks, and I'm gonna use as a crutch. I walk in a room like, you know what? I got this back pain, or I'm having these memory issues, because I did something 99.999999% of the world are unwilling to do. And it can break me, right?

So it makes me feel different and different is good and different leads to success. So. Jay, when it hits you, I read, by the way, I read the whole book in a day and a half. Like I just, it grabbed me because I think it always in my family, there's been a little bit of the gray. They tend to the gray. I think there's my family, there's been a little bit of the gray, they tend to the gray. I think there's extremes of it, right? But I just feel like almost genetically in my family.

Maybe there's a little of that. Maybe most people can relate to that a little bit. But what struck me about when you say, it doesn't just affect you, in your mind or your emotions, you actually can feel it sometimes physically, right? They'll elaborate on that. So when I have a full blown attack,

and it's a lot more than people realize, like I just had one, I look, sure, I'd won last week, I couldn't get out of bed at the bowl four o'clock. One of my training partners, Mark Kerr, like literally had to come over and I'll ask them, well, I will reach out for help. I used to not, I used to just have blow up, your incident, so I just sit in my bed, right? And now I'll ask them, well, I will reach out for help. I used to not. I used to have, blow up your incident. So I just sit in my bed, right?

And now I will ask for help. Now, call my boy else, say, man, I need you to come over today. I've now shared with a lot of my close, very duetly type friends. All right, guys in the NFL, managed to bring us so much closer together. I think they want to be on this journey, but you're talking about the physical part. I feel it in my heart.

I feel it on the left side of my gut. So we hear about gut punches or, man, go with your gut. You have a feeling in your gut. My gut feels just, man, it's hurting, like there's spider rubs in there and chains. And then I feel like I'm in a 50-round fight. Like, I just had a canceled dinner with Strahan because, as I do, I just can't go down. I'm just exhausted. I literally felt like I got to move 50-round fight. And again, I try to make it very, very limited of where it knocks me on my butt. Like I am relentless in everything I do.

Like I have to be relentless to go out for my dreams so I can get that outside love. So once I make the decision to get out of bed, go out for my dreams so I can get that outside love. So once I make the decision to get out of bed, I go for like I will outwork the world, I will train that way and fight that way and live life that way, but getting out of bed, man, when you have these heavy chains pulling you through down through the darkness, it's hard's it's literally it's hard every

it's hard for me to get out of bed the more. But man, those 15 minutes and I lay my head on my pillow every night. I want to get emotional here. Because sometimes I do because I actually kind of look at me and like feel bad for that person and want to give him a hug. Yeah. like feel bad for that person and want to give them hope. But when you let your head on your pillow at night, when you buy yourself those 50 minutes, and you're with someone that you don't know how to love or like or feel worthy being liked or loved. Think of that, like, man, that's hard.

It's a hard thing. And I'm hoping by this book, like I know for me, having teammates again really, really lifts me up. Let's see how I'm. Thank you, brother. I appreciate this very much, man. Hey, no one's question, my man, I'll cry on the drop and it's fine, right?

Right, right. I'm hoping by this book, I can get a lot more teammates that I could lift up, because I could be a service service to people but then they in turn could lift me up because I just like I don't deserve to to lay at night every night and you know look at that person go man it's such a terrible person such a horrible person like everybody says you gotta see all this great stuff you're doing for people and I'm not able to just see it because the roommates on my head tell me a much different story about myself. But I've been, I've had a couple incidents here and there lately now that I started doing these videos, why I've felt it. And I'm 52.

And now just for the first time my life going, hey, maybe, like maybe there's a chance. Yeah, brother. I got to tell you, I'm emotional listening to you just because I can't get over the courage it takes to be you and share this. And you know, I just want to acknowledge you for that, bro. Like I just see everything interesting. I admired a lot of things about you that were really surface based from a distance because we got a ton of mutual friends. And then now I'm beginning to admire you for real stuff.

And maybe that's where you're going with you. Yeah. Instead of just being the surface things of who you know or what you've done or how hard you can kick or punch that maybe you're getting there like, hey man, I'm a good man. I deserve to be happy. Because I think millions of people listening to this

are like, I relate to that to some level that I don't deserve to be loved or I don't even love myself. Or, you know, if they knew all this stuff I've done or I think or then they really wouldn't love me. You know, it was all these guilt we carry and shame about some of its nonsense. But the other thing you do, man, is like he doesn't just say, hey man, I'm hurting. He tells you, when it's working, here's some of the things I do that works.

And you just said that about your buddy coming over and getting you out of bed. Talk about these three things real quick. You said, I need a team, number one, I need to be in service to others, number two, and I need to laugh, number three, right? And so these are like, these are pathways out of getting out of bed. These are pathways to that day winning the battle, even though you're not going to win it every day. All of us have struggled with any mental health.

They're just days we lose. I say this, Jay, about my son. I'm a golfer. I suck. Straight ahead and just play to my club by the way, Saturday. Maybe those the night you're going to have dinner with him. Oh, that's great. Madison. Madison.

You played at the Madison. Yeah. At Melbourne's place. Yeah, but my son is a better golfer than me. Not because he never hits good shot, bad shots. It's his dispersion. In other words, my bad shot can go 100 yards left or 300 yards right.

My sons are 20 yards, it's dispersion. So if you have mental health issues, sometimes it's not, you're never gonna have a bad day. It's the dispersion, how bad is the day or how many of them are there. And if you can shrink the dispersion of the distance between them, you win. And so you have those three things.

Need a team, need to be a service of others, need to laugh, talk about that. Yeah, like, you know, that's my, and this is a prescriptive book, right? So I have a couple of different, I have a couple of chapters on, you know, on how to have a team, like there's different ways to have a team

and how to be a service. Even when I, like, listen to the first, you'll read it. The first 10 years of my career, I would make a $9,700 a year. Live in a New York City. I didn't have enough money to go back and forth from, to take a subway to a bus from New York City to John Stadium. And then back to Stray Andrew,

I'll be back in the city every single day for like eight years, which means I own like 26 grand and Lincoln Tunnel Fair. But I worked my... like eight years, which means I own like 26 ran and Lincoln tunnel fair. But I worked my, so I'm doing this. But even when I was broke, I knew the things that needed, that I needed for my own mental health. We didn't talk about mental health back then.

But back then I'm like I have to be a service. So I figured out ways to be a service which didn't cost really any money or not much money at all. Whereas I would use my time or just be creative with some people who needed it. So that's in the book. And then the laughter part, oh, dude, I have a whole practical joke chapter

because there's a price to be paid for being Jake laser's friend because the gray h laughter. So I'm constantly trying to laugh. And like you said, a lot of the stuff, there's server stuff. I'm a big personality on TV and out in public, but it's the hide my pain like it's part of it is the is that's what I yeah, I like being on tell I feel safe on TV. I feel safe in a cage. I'm

feel safe for the rest of the world. But that's a big person I've been a lot of it to is to just overcompensate for how worthless I always feel. Gosh, yeah. So for the laughter part, whenever I'm struggling, I struggle a lot of TV and people don't know. And you'll really find out in the book just how much I have anxiety and panic attacks going into Dan and every show. So if you see me on Fox early, like tracking a joke,

I'm actually doing it because it gets me, it gets my, I call it, like I wrestle with my abuser, gets those anxiety attacks away, like it hates laughter. So until I can laugh, a lot of times I am like, out of my mind. So there's different things with laughter, but the team also, like, like my team, I have teams in so many different areas

and like God is a team for me and my fight team is a team for me and my football family is a team for me. My fox and about some day family is a team for me. My little rescue pit I adopted is a team for me. Like we need teams because what's the biggest thing here? I just sit like those of us with any sort of mental stuff we tend to isolate.

Yeah. We isolate, man, that's scary. That's when the roommates in your head start talking really bad at each other, right? So you got a team, the roommates in your head will talk a little bit nicer than each other. It's part of talking about it, Jay, like just your awareness that these roommates are talking,

do they lose a little of their power over you just when you're aware? Like, hey, here I go again. Like, I think for years, some people live in patterns. They don't even know what's happening. Oh, I know what happens. You do. Do you think the awareness, two things?

One, does the awareness of it minimize it at all and two, your real physical dude? How important is the physical moving your body? I doubt, maybe I'm wrong. Have you ever been in the midst of like massive physical activity and still felt these things? Or is that also a pathway out for you when you're getting real physical, you're really moving your body? Huge pathway. I mean, trolling me to the post of like, man, if you could, if we could take

working out and put it in the pill would be the best antidepressant of all time. Right. And it should. Like you've got it. Like for me, I asked when I was starting the last week, I asked Mark Kerr, who's the first ever UFC champion in the world, who need you to come over and we need his part. Basically, I'm like, give me more CT. I need you to punch me by that. But yeah, like I will force myself to, I will say this when I start some of these workouts, I'm going to really, and I'm going to really bad place. Man, it's hard and I can feel it again.

The physical part, it causes inflammation. So I've been flamed and my joints hurt, but as I start getting through that workout and then as I know I accomplish something. So you're going to do the workout, just get through it. Don't cut it short, get through it because of the end, you just feel better because, okay, I did. Don't cut it short, get through it because of the end, you just feel better

because, okay, I did. I was able to fight through my own darkness and get through something today, that's able to push my breaking point a little bit. That's able to fight back against the great stuff. And you said it before, by the way, it's the gray nowadays, it's not just if I have, if you have depression,

anxiety, like I do, okay? It's all of us. I just spoke to a room of 75 clinicians. And that's it, listen, schooling is your expertise. Suffering is my expertise. It's a different thing. You don't want to school before the cell phone came out. And before Instagram and Facebook and Twitter and man, like, it's just such a hard life

these days when we're comparing ourselves. I'm, look, I'm looking. I'm on the number one TV show, Sports Show, and the History of America. And I still feel freaking left out, like I look at somebody else's Instagram, like, damn, my life sucks. How come I'm not doing it? And it's fake. We're comparing ourselves to somebody else's filter, fraction of a second of one minute,

of one hour of one day. And we all think our lives suck. And then you look on Twitter and the way people talk to each other, and I was just explaining this to John Gordon. You're got John Gordon the other day. It's fun. I said, think about this.

We're kids growing up and man, you got bullied on the playground. I'm from Jersey, sure. So there's a lot of that s*** going on. Yeah. It sucked for you for the weekend, right? It was bad. Or it would happen to your friend. It sucked, right? It lasted for a few days. But we now have that same feeling and see that a

thousand times a second. So true. See somebody getting bullied or talked to and even if it's not about you, it hurts the human condition and it changes us here. So, you know, I asked them all, I said, I need you to kind of almost go back to school and figure out how is the brain morphed with all this, with all the negative stuff that we see. And how left out we're all feeling. So true, even I have that, man, I'll check social media sometimes. I'm like, crap, I thought I had a pretty good gig going here. I'm not doing that.

They're having a blood. They're way happier than me. And there's like this fake threshold of happiness that because everyone's taken 80 pictures before they post a one or 100 videos and it's so brilliant. It ain't real. It's so funny. I was at dinner the other night and this family was literally arguing like loud arguing in the restaurant. I'm talking like F bombs back and forth of the husband and the wife in front of the

kids. What's my family? No, that sounds like mine too. And my family I came from. I'm like, right, anyway, they're yelling at each other. And then the guy that server comes up and the day goes, we take a picture of family and it was like hugs and smiles. And when you see that post, you're like, this is a loving, wow, what a great dinner.

They were literally ready to kill each other 20 seconds before. So man, you're totally right. You're today's social man, hit me. And you're hitting me right now. Like I think vulnerability is one of the most masculine things you can do. Jason, the most masculine, he's in football, he's in MMA world, he's with vets. Like there's a lot of masculinity around this dude. And so that's why it takes to me extra courage.

But I think oftentimes our secrets, our vulnerability, is our pathway to serving, which you said earlier, is the pathway to serving other people, to show our weaknesses, not our strengths. And it's say, hey, man, I'm just like you, or maybe there's even things about me that you couldn't even imagine to be true. Almost feel like you found your stride.

So you said in the book, I'm going to quote it down, sometimes our darkest moments become the seed of something beautiful. And you've now gone to social recently going, hey guys, I'm in the grade today and posting it. So talk to them, just share with them what the heck happened to you yesterday from you sharing this.

This is a public figure on television, you know, getting information people out of time. And he's going to do this. So go ahead. I know you're going to cry again, but go ahead. Oh, God. Yeah. And look again, vulnerability is too strength.

Doesn't matter how big our muscles are. It means nothing. It's fake, right? The vulnerability is what that's going to move mountains and move walls and breaks chains and breaks bonds off us. And builds bonds, I should say, breaks those chains off us. So yeah, I started because when the book came out, I was everybody knows mutual footballer fighting the ballers and stuff. And they're like, we want people to

really kind of understand, like this isn't a sports book. This is, there's a lot of sports analogies because the books filled with my sports world to get there. But the time we had this meeting, we had another month until the book came out. I said, hey, listen, I really want to start helping people now, like right now, like now that I could see because everybody read it, they're like,

oh my god, you're going to change the world. And this is great. And I said, I don't know, I almost tell people now. And I said, you know what? I'm going to start posting in real time to show people what it's really like so they know they're not alone. And yeah, that first one, man, I got, when I told people, this one's going to happen. I'm going to take a journey with you and show you what it's really like.

Like in the goods and bad. And I want to so like have the team. So I say, you know, post down there, if you're struggling and I want you all to read my comments and lift that person up. Yeah. Man, that first post did, you know, 700,000 views and hundreds of messages where people were sharing

and lifting each other. And that's what it's supposed to be. You see me and make up on TV. You see me dressed up. Let's we all see. We don't ever see like what it's really like. This is what people wake up to. This crap. It's what we wake up to. So yeah, I want to be that voice. I want to walk this walk through everybody there. And you know, the rock did my forward. And you're like, you're going to be the voice for the great for all of us

in the great. And that's where that's why I did it when I was so powerful. So I've continued to post these, the good stuff, time, and all of it. And it really has been, it's been, yeah, it's been just remarkable. And I have not felt as alone because everybody else has now chimed in. Like, when you have the mental health issues, you feel isolated. Again, it's my own roommate, saying the wrong things to me in my head. So yesterday, I leave unbreakable. My gym up on sunset strip that I have, and I'm going back to my hotel and driving down sunset strip on the back of the car service and going back to Uber I pulled to a light right on sunset in San Vicente and there's a woman who's in the next truck over and she kind of looks me and does a

double take. That said thank you so much. Oh, here God, I'm about to cry. She goes thank you so much for what you've been posting on mental health. I said, oh, absolutely. She said, no, I'm in my car driving right now because I was having one of those days in the gray and I listened to your post and I got out and I'm taking a drive. Basically, she doesn't isolate. I was like, what's with, I can't believe that you just pulled up next to me. It's crazy. It's that unbelievable crazy. Oh my God. And that's God, man. I think that's God.

That's you planting the seeds and that's the harvest from God. That's what I believe. I couldn't believe it. I said, oh my, she said, thank you. I like, I can't believe you're, but you're the reason that I'm driving around right now to clear, to clear my mind out of the isolation. And I posted it today and she posted

and said that was me that was me and she actually crazy enough she works in sports too. No way man. So a timeline go go look I was just like oh my god and now she just like DM has to well now you're stuck with me so we're

good but it's I don't think and I think Jay I want to say something to everybody about this. I don't know up to you just because it's so powerful. I don't think you have to be Jay Glazer to do say something to everybody about this. I don't know up to you just because it's so powerful. I don't think you have to be Jay Glazer to do this. What if we started, what if we started to look at social media differently?

What if a lot of us started to post, hey, I'm in the grade today. Here's what I'm struggling with today. For some of you, if you really wanted to build a following, you had an ulterior motive, which is okay. People would rather have you document your journey than just post filtered pictures of yourself. So even if I wanted to do something where you wanted to build a following, I can promise you, you start to share your struggles

and your vulnerabilities, no matter who you are. You're a, you're a, you're a, right now raising a couple of babies at home and you're a mother and you start showing the, the struggle in the morning to get them off the school and to get things ready and get to your job and how all that affects you and maybe some days you're not feeling fulfilled

or appreciated. I'm telling you, you would help more people that way than showing this great state dinner you had with a bottle of wine with everyone that everyone else is posting. Don't you agree? I'm a friend of John Mullin, who is one of my mentors when I started becoming a sports reporter for the near post, which I totally like scam my way into back then, since I don't know where it's, and it's all in the book for my non-granted year.

But John covered the bearish for years and years and John right now was fighting a bad cancer battle. And I said to him, hey dude, what you gotta do here? Like me again, how could we be of service? I told him it really helps me to be of service as a John. And he's going through like pancreatic and stomach cancer. I said, if you found anywhere online to like to look to see like what you're about to, you know, embark on. He's like, no, I said, why don't you be that guy? I said, why don't you

start journaling and why don't you start doing videos. So other people who are about to battle this kind of cancer, now at least have your videos. They know what they're getting themselves into and they can walk this walk with you. And he started doing that. It's awesome. That's what exactly. They're million percent. And he started putting on YouTube. But now if someone has it, they can Google and we'll look it up and it'll come up and he's still you still find it. Still battling. God bless him. God bless him. He's the best. But he's going to help a lot of people. And that's the same thing. Like if you're right. Like how many more pictures can we see of people freaking told him at the beach with some **** with some sort of whatever, you know, or

or that or a dinner party where they actually hate each other. And by the way, even if you know, even if your motive was to grow your social, I can just tell you guys all this. No one's gonna share a post of you eating a steak with a bottle of wine. But you start saying, this is what I'm struggling with my weight or my relationship or my emotions or my mental health.

You might be surprised how much people start to share your stuff, because every day people, that's what social media really should be for is people helping one another on social. So I just, the fact that it's you, it takes, I think, I think anyone to do it

takes an extreme amount of courage. But when you're at the top and people look at you, I think there's another layer of courage that you're embodying right now that I just, I love and you're doing it again today on the show. So I just wanna acknowledge that. Now, there's another side to Jay, by the way, which is not just the mental health side.

There's a man who struggled for decades to build a career. There's not a lot of spots for what Jay does on the planet. There's like a couple, right? So this is a dude who's worked his way to the top of his profession. He's humble, but it's just a fact. And you know, not everybody can go, Hey, Joanne Johnson, right, the forward of my book, right? Or hey, you know, straight in, I got to cancel dinner on you, right? And to be on television every single week. And so he's worked his way to be an achiever at the highest of all high levels. And you have this thing in the book, you know, if you can cover some of it, I'd appreciate it.

The unbreakable mindset. There's like five things you share in the book. And I'm reading it. I'm like, yep, that's true. Yep, that's true. Yep, I did that. So would you share a couple of those points at least? Well, maybe not all of them so they can go get the book.

But what are few of the unbreakable mindset points? Well, there's two. There's unbreakable mindset for how we train guys and they have breakable mindset in life. But yeah, like for my life, again, I made $9,700 a year for the first 10 years. So I just walk in that near giant locker room in 1993. I'm like, I'll be the last two standing here. I will outwork the world. Now, if I live with by a lot, so if they're working nine to five, I'm going to come in at six or seven a.m. and leave until whenever stray hand draws my back to the city, which is usually seven at night. So I'm putting 12 hours, not eight hours, right? And man, how could I be different? Like

going there, you know, got to be authentic, and you got to be different. Like different is good, different, least the success. I tell our vets this all the time, like, hey, don't you be a face in the crowd? Be the damn crowd. Like stand out, be the crowd. That's the part of success. But, you know, getting there, people see me now, right? Yes, I'm the, our show is the only

sports show ever in the TV all of that. And, what we didn't see is the 10 years of me saying, I'm going to get rejected more than any human being on the planet. And you know, I talk about a team like God being one of my team. Part of my team. And it's like, look, I'm a big God guy. It's my choice to have faith. You know, it's on you, but it doesn't really hurt you that I have faith. It's great. My point. And I would literally say to God every week, listen, I'm going to go after, I'm going to do it.

I'm willing to get rejected over and over and over and over. All I'm asking you, God, is that when I do get knocked out, you pick me up, you brush me off, and let's keep walking this walk together. And I got it. So, man, listen, though, 10, 11 years of being rejected, that's, you know, a me standing on, when I said I'll be the last dude standing there, I meant it, that's horrible, that's swimming upstream for a long time. That is exhausting. And then when I finally got there, I became the first minute by minute breaking news guy in America, me and a guy named Lin-Pas really, when that internet thing came out, which I think

is going to catch up. And then that was the result. Like there was no crawl on the bottom of the screen before. Like everything was newspapers. So we're the first one to use the internet to break news by the second. And then Chris Wormson jumped in on that and John Clayton. And then it became a bigger thing.

But this is 99. I was breaking news on the internet and made it what it is now, which is everything is minute by minute breaking news. But that was exhausting, because it's me versus ESPN. And then I'm like, OK, I got to now show the world that I'm breaking this list to try and continue to move up the ladder. So listen, being successful, it's exhausting.

There's no, the average quick steam, there's no overnight success that's completely full of crap. It's you out work in the world, not by a little by a lot, and being, my other thing is loyalty. And my dad taught me, my working world and your loyal, the greens will come true.

So, over time, we talk about these team because of my loyalty. I've been able to have a lot of these relationships. You know, I can't do it myself and either relationships. Yep. The loyalty is a lot of a lost heart. It's one of the chapters, everybody. I think the second chapter. Yeah. Everybody wants something from somebody. Yeah. Okay, here's the difference. I just look at it go man, how can I help out this person, this person, this person? And I'm hoping 10% of them, 15% do the same back for me. Yeah. And I can do that.

And I got a pretty good little mafia. Yeah. That's the true called law of reciprocity, everybody. It's really weird because you wrote the book and I'm like, most people wouldn't talk about it. For me, like, one of the most valued traits, I don't know if it's the way I was raised or what, but loyalty is a massive thing to me. When you go through real crap times, you figure out really, you just called it a lost

art form. It is a really lost art form in today's world, right? People run from you. I'll never forget, man, I was playing Flag Football when I was in the eighth grade. This guy's name was Tom McManus. He got tackled, right? And he separated his elbow and it was horrible looking. And right when it happened, it was gory, he was screaming.

And I remember watching everyone just naturally ran away from him as kids, like ran away. And I remember me and one other dude, I stood there and I looked at him and I moved towards him. Yes. I remember this is in the eighth grade because he was excruciating paint everyone physically ran from him. And I remember like as I was over there kind of comforting the guy and they called an ambulance

I remember thinking I kind of want to be this guy. I mean, eighth grade. I want to be that guy on my life. I'm going to run towards the dude who's hurting not a way for him. And that's a decision you made. That's very cool. That's the thing also it's our choices, right? What do we decide? You decide to be that guy. I that's a decision you made. That's very cool. That's the thing also, it's our choices, right? What do we decide?

You decide to be that guy. I'm gonna go to it. And you know what? I would say there's only two times a life you can find out who you really are. And you found out that day who you really were. I think so. You know what I'm gonna go back to it.

It's pretty cool. What's this deal with next Tuesday? I just feel like it was so good in the book that you could share this with everybody. Like guys, I think it might be, like I want you to really, if you're driving, really listen right now. Because I think that's perfect. That's what I said to the girl when she pulled up next to me. You did. You never know what lies around next Tuesday. As in, like with Logan, like man, Logan, it sucked your head leukemia. But you fought it and beat it. And now because of that,

you have helped start a foundation where thousands of veterans have not committed suicide or have gotten jobs or we have hired a bunch of, a bunch of our hires at MVP were homeless when we met them. Now of jobs and homes and man, so Logan, it sucked you into that. But again, like if you didn't, they wouldn't be where they are. These are kids and husbands and wives and daughters and sons and soon to be fathers and mothers.

And you know, and I said that to this girl yesterday, like, you never know what lies around next Tuesday. As in, man, you never know what lies around next Tuesday. As in, man, you never know something that you're working for. All of a sudden, it just pops next week or you meet the love of your life next week or you learn how to give yourself a break next week. Like, I guess it's my way of saying hope and it's faith. Bingo. Yes. Right. So you just never know what lies around next Tuesday. If we're all sitting there just in the present and feeling so crappy about ourselves,

it's hard to get ourselves out of it. But if you have hope that, hey, you know what? I don't know what lies around that corner. Yeah. Get more idea. Right. So I had those 10 years where I didn't get a job. Yeah. I kept getting this in there next week. Next week will be that week.

Next week will be that week. And finally, when I got the full time job and it was funny, my agent, Mori Goss, friend calls me, I'm gonna a little driver-anxer, Randall's Island, I was living in the city. My agent called me again, 10 years in, of making $9,700 a year. And New York, that sucks.

And the book starts with how crappy my apartment was, with Strahan trying to go to bathroom and he couldn't, right? Because he's talking about the bathroom door. You have to bathroom and he couldn't, right? Yeah. It's just all because of the bathroom door. Yeah. You have to refrigerate a block. True story. Um, my agent calls, he's like, Hey, you can exhale. I said, what do you say?

We finally got your full time job. I said, what? So we find again, this is 10-fweekend years in. Right. And I said, oh my god, who? And he said, CBS. And I said, I'll take it. And he said, don't you want to have much for? I said, I don't give a right.

Right. Validate of me or all those years, like I was going to work my self till something happened. That next Tuesday. Yeah. Right. When I'm talking about my locker, I'm going to be different than everybody else in here. I'm going to have work them all. Whoever said quitting is not an option. It's the biggest moron on the planet. It's the easiest option in the world. It sits there all day long. It's my moment. It validated me. Yeah. And if anybody ever asked you whether it was worth it, it's a thousand times better than even you thought it could be once you finally get there. I think, don't you? That moment is that moment. And what I've done is for a lot of 20 years until I got it. Yes.

Like, since yes, it is not over or not. It just, it's not. It's the consistency and if that consistent loyalty and consistent hard work. Yeah. And, you know, there's a reason why people are successful because they're willing to put the hour to when no one's watching. Yeah, when there are no ones watching. And the other thing too about quitting, that's really interesting, is people think you have to make a decision to never quit. But actually, my dad stopped drinking for like 35 years. And I used to say, hey, daddy, when he was a little, are you never going to drink again?

My dad would say, I'm not drinking today. He didn't even one day at a time. So you're thinking about quitting. Just don't quit for today. If you can't get out of bed, just get out of bed today. Just get out of bed today at a time. So you're thinking about quitting. Just don't quit for today. You can't get out of bed. Just get out of bed today. Just get out of bed today

because you never know what's coming next Tuesday. I just feel like that's one of the great analogies I've ever heard in my damn life. And it's buying yourself another day. You know, sometimes thinking, I gotta make this massive life thing commit. Listen, you have big lifetime goals and then execute today.

Don't quit today. Stay in the hunt today. Take care of yourself today. Serve other people today, right? Stay engaged today. Stay execute today. Don't quit today. Stay in the hunt today. Take care of yourself today. Serve other people today, right? Stay engaged today. Stay loyal today. And when you start stacking up those days, and it may sound corny,

but you start stacking up those days over eight or 10 or 12 years, there's gonna be that day where you get that call. There's that moment. And, you know, again, I said, I'm a big faith in God, guys. So I read kind of like my prayer books, just where they work for me, okay?

I learned something in there. It said, appreciate the toil of the client. Appreciate the toil of the client. So good. And so what I decided way back when was, okay, the pot of gold at the end of Rainbow is not becoming J. Glazer at the NFL Fox. It's not becoming J. Glazer at the end of the fall of Fox. It's not becoming J. Glazer at all or the other shows that I do. The part of the end of the,

part of the gold in the rainbow is the journey itself. I never knew I was going to get there. So I literally started saying, man, this is cool. I get to go to a press conference. I'm not making any money. It's pretty pretty damn and damn cool. I'm a, and that's, and look, if, if the, you know, the, the pot of gold in the rainbow was, was, was the jobs that we got or big breaks or something like that, you and Emily celebrities having all these issues. You wouldn't have people kill themselves who were at the top. So it's not that.

So I want people to appreciate the journey and not consider yourself a failure, you're comparing yourself to what somebody else has done. The journey is the beautiful part. And you know what? So true. I probably was happier back then in the journey because I didn't have any, I didn't know the pressure of losing what I have now. That true. Our final is going to lose it. Right. So it's one of the realest things ever. When you're climbing, you've got these emotions that you won't get there. And when you get there, it switches. I've had, you know, Sebastian Manescalco, who I know, you know, I'm a show, one of the funniest dudes on the planet, right? But best Sunday, going,

where he goes, now I worry about losing it. And that's part of it. And that's just part of it. But I think the journey part, guys, I would just add to what Jay is saying for me, it's not what's happening to me. It's what's happening in me as I'm going through that journey. It's the moments. It's the memories. It's the, hey, man, eventually I've made a difference here. I've contributed. And you say this with the vets. So he's got this MVP, which is getting the athletes with the vets, right? And one of the things that there's this huge suicide rate, depression rate, there's a little thing you said in there. I just want to have you elaborate on it. So I want to make sure I understood it where

their identities were tied to being warriors, right? And then when that's taken, this happens as you know with a lot of athletes. Their identity is, I'm a wide receiver for the Eagles. You take away, and then a fell, they don't know who they are. You take away, they're not in combat anymore, they don't know who they are.

And maybe it's even something that I'm a mother and then your children leave because they've grown up and now you no longer are a mother and you've tied your identity to what you do as opposed to who you are. And this is one of the things you work on with the vets and I imagine you're doing that work with yourself too. Yeah, I mean, here's the biggest thing

is I'm trying to get them all to understand. Especially our vets, they are in green to not have individuality. Well, MVP is living through the transition. The only way you're going to get through the transition, the rest of us, everybody else lies on their resume. Veterans, dumb there's down like they don't want to brag about those stuff. I'm like, no, I need you like, I will hire someone in two seconds and they're like, I guess I got Denver. They had a bridge that got blown up with the guy I racked by these suicide bombers. He pulled nine people out of this bridge. And it took him three years to tell us this.

I'm like, dude, dude, get me. Like, another guy, I like Ruiz helped save all these American POWs. The first ever African-American female POW him and his crew and he got injured. And he was at the first MVP I ever helped. A lot of these vets, they are in grain not to have individuality. And like, I tell them all, they've done incredible things. They've got a grace under fire, courage under pressure, and they've been loyal. And you know, take care of their brothers and sisters in the right left.

The uniform comes back and they come here and they're like, oh, I'm different. But they're head down. And I want to switch they're like, oh, I'm different. But they're head down. And I want to switch that tone to no, you're different. Different is good. Yes. I think we need to success. I said before, right? And our football players or athletes, they always, man, their uniform comes off and

they're like, oh, I used to play in the NFL or I used to fight or I used to be an Olympic. Oh, so you always will be that part. You are the, and that's not who you are. Your uniforms now you are. What's behind your rib cage that got you to beat out. Millions and millions and millions. The player on that level, that's who you are. That's only double it just leave

when the uniform comes off. Who reminds them of this? Oh, that's very good. So that's what we're reminding you of. Now when everybody's saying, like, there's something that makes each one of us different. We got us, we got it in us. We've got to be proud of it and use it and walk in a room

like, I'm not like everybody else here. And every single person listening to home has something. They've got something. They've just got to realize this and not beat it back down. Look, my vets don't like when I say, I need you to start bragging about your shit. Is that all? No, we don't brag.

It's not bragging about it's true. That's right. Right? And a Deon Sanders would never say, oh, maybe I'll pick off that pass. I'm saying, right? Wouldn't say, I might not like the true. No, I'm not gonna your ass out.

I'm picking that pass off. And our vets aren't ing going to ask out. I'm picking that up. That's all. And I'm sorry and ready to do that. It gets me so uncomfortable. My job is to help them to transition. And a lot of times I get really uncomfortable and push back with how I say this stuff because it's given all these years of, you don't talk about it. You're just team, team, team. Okay, well, that team's not there for you.

So we now need to build a new team for you. And a team that could lift you up from the inside out. Bro, I think that's true of all people. I think it's a microcosm. Most people don't embrace their individuality. They almost suppress their differences. Their different emotions, their different thoughts. Brother, I'm gonna ask you one more question

because we're pressed on time. But like I just first, I wanna thank you for today because I know we've helped millions of people. Actually, maybe I meant that. You've helped millions of people actually may remember that you've helped millions of people today and and Because of your courage and the example of what he's doing is what I want everybody to take from today Obviously, there's the tools and the resources and the thoughts and the strategies and all the stories you've heard But it's also what he's embodying the service the different things he's done the vulnerability the guts it takes to go

Hey, I'm struggling with this right now. You know, the 10 years of work to get their finally to break 10 grand in friggin' income, all these things this man's done is just, it's remarkable. So the last question is a simple one. It's just like, I want to make sure we covered everything and we didn't lose, miss something. I'm someone listening to Jay Glazer right now, I'm like, hey man, thank you. I'm following you now. I'm going to be doing my own mental health checkups. I'm probably going to start to share about whatever my thing is. My name is me mental. It might be physical, emotional, whatever.

Anywhere I'm struggling, I'm somewhere gray. I'm somewhere anxiety, depression, frustration, fear. Right? Lack of self-confidence is a huge one for most people. And by the way, we all got fear. Right. Right. Right. There's no same in that.

Yeah, zero. So what would your message be them got here. There's no same in that. Yeah. Zero. So, so, so what would your message be? Here's just a place to start, man. Like, you're there today. You listen to the show. Maybe the show.

Maybe you feel a little bit better. Here's just one additional thing, sister or brother that you should think about or do. It's two things. One, yes, definitely start talking to your people about this. Get you closer together. I didn't start like, I didn't tell Straya and that I had a breakdown till two months ago. The first time I ever told him.

Wow. He put my best friend for 30 years and he actually said to me, and I told him I had to get out of dinner and he goes, oh, do you want me to come over? Like now, say, do you want me to talk about it? I said now, and he goes,

why have you never told me about this? Yeah. I said, I don't, why have you never told me about this? Yeah. I said, I don't make the rules of this thing, bro. Man, for some reason with you, I felt ashamed. Maybe because he and I compete so much. I don't know. Then I went to the Super Bowl last year. It's a really strong one.

I went down because one of my other really close friends, Ronde, Barbara, we have a little crew. Me, Ronde, it's kind of Brian, round again, good health, ill fun, and I need to be around football, right? But I wanna go and I told them, I'm struggling, I need to, who copy guys, like, what do you mean? Because they just see the laughing jockey glaze all the time.

Yeah. And they sat there with them, and I told them, and it got us so much closer together. And so, open up to, and even people like, if you read the book, you'll see the way I describe my depression anxiety, by trying to teach Sean McVeigh, they head coach the Rams, what living the Gray is like, he doesn't get it, he doesn't understand it to this level. He does now, and he allowed me to recreate the entire dinner that we have, me and Andrew Whitworth, about what this darkness

does. The darkness can fuel us to do great things. But we got to keep the monster in the box a lot of times. So there's ways to use it to motivate you to do great things. So call your people, tell them about it. When you're struggling, don't think it's ever too much because it's not, because they want to help you. It allows them to be a service to you. And that's my other thing. A figure way to be of service, whether it's you like dogs or you want to help the elderly or children or whatever. And there's a bunch of ideas in the books of what you could do. What I've done, what you could do, but being of service will then help you immensely. And that that's real. Not the other stuff. That's real, right?

Not the filtered Instagram moments. And that's real. Yeah. You're real, bro. This is a remarkable conversation. I knew we're going to have a good talk today. But I don't know that we were going all these places, man. Like, I love you, brother.

I'm really, I know what you're going to, we're just getting to know each other pretty well. Like I'm proud of you. I'm really proud of you. And I hope you're proud of you, man. Yeah, I'm getting there, man. I'm really, I know what you're doing. We're just getting to know each other pretty well. Like I'm proud of you. I'm really proud of you. And I hope you're proud of you, man. Yeah, I'm getting there, man. I'm trying. Good. I'm not that moment yesterday. When I hear yeah, like you said, man, you're going to like again, being a service for me. Where I got to get better is that a moment like this, it makes me feel good in the moment. But I'm trying to build those moments where I have, where I'm not stuck in a pit down there of hopelessness.

I now'm up on my own platform. So I'm trying to build these building blocks. Yeah, shrink your dispersion in between how many times it happens and how deep it happens. And by the way, I submit my name to be on your team. So anything you ever need, bro, you got my number, you know that and I'm here for you So I got you, man. Thank you, and you've been on a lot of millions of people's a team today

So Jake laser. Thank you guys go get unbreakable follow Jay on social All right, you got it. Tell me you got it. Where do you get it? Where do you want us to get it? Amazon anywhere? They get a book I'm going to know about Harper Collins anywhere you go get it right here Go get it guys. He's holding up for the YouTube watchers and for everybody else. Share today's show for anyone you love and care about who's dealing with any of these issues so that we can spread the word and maybe they'll pick up the book as well. So God bless everybody. Let me walk this walk together. We'll walk it together. Max out everyone. God bless you.

Appreciate it man. This is The Edmila Show. You