THE ED MYLETT SHOW - How To Turn Wounds Into Wisdom w/ Jeezy

Episode Date: November 28, 2023

If you've ever felt like your dreams are just too far out of reach, or you're not cut out for an extraordinary life, hold up! Get ready for a story of raw transformation, of turning the tides against all odds, from none other than a rap legend and cultural powerhouse, JAY "JEEZY" JENKINS.Let's face it, Jeezy didn't have the red carpet rolled out for him. Growing up with the bare minimum in Georgia, dropping out in 6th grade, he's the definition of self-made. He transformed his life from the gritty streets into a blazing path in the music industry, laying the foundations of TRAP MUSIC alongside T.I. and Gucci Mane and skyrocketing to the top with DEF JAM.Jeezy's latest masterpiece, "ADVERSITY FOR SALE: YA GOTTA BELIEVE," isn't your average success story. It’s a blueprint, a series of hard-knock life lessons, and a journey to becoming a multi-platinum artist, entrepreneur, and a man of impact.So, what can we learn from Jeezy? Buckle up because this is where it gets real:The street smarts that became Jeezy's armor in the wild music industry.Inspirations from rap legends like TUPAC and MASTER P.Why staying humble and thirsty for knowledge is your ticket to the top.Jeezy's raw, unfiltered experiences with the law, and the hard truth of PTSD, depression, and the cost of fame.His pivotal moments of healing and self-discovery.The enigma of success versus personal happiness.Staying strong when life takes away those closest to you.Navigating life with a “MENTAL GPS.”The role of faith and divine guidance in Jeezy's life.Choosing ADVERSITY as his book’s theme and the reasons behind it.Jeezy's journey is more than inspirational—it's a roadmap for anyone feeling lost.This is REAL TALK from the streets to stardom.

This is the Ed Milach Show. Welcome back everybody. I've been talking to this man about having him on the show here for, I don't know, like six or eight months. And you would think, well, you want to have him on because he's this, you know, Grammy-nominated artist that everybody knows. And it's not really what I wanted him on. I wanted him on because this man has dimension and depth.

He's a really unique person because he's obviously very talented, sold millions, millions of records, but he's got this dimension and depth because of his life experience and because of his work on himself in personal development. He's also got a book out called Adversity for Sale and it's really, really good.

I read the entire thing in two days. So GZJ Jenkins, welcome to the show. Let's see how you're doing my brother. It's so good to have you and I'm doing very well. I'm sorry to be here, man. Well, thank you. I'm honored to have you. I'll let you show every morning.

Why do you know you put episodes out like every couple of days, we'll take you out. Thank you. Yeah. I want to ask you, I told him off camera, I said, I'm going to ask you stuff that's going to push you today. Right.

Because the things I want to understand about life and how stuff that's gonna push you today. Right. Because the things I wanna understand about life and how things intersect and are connected. So, some of it will be in the book, some of it won't be. Oh, good. So, you get interesting upbringing, those of you don't know, kind of a military upbringing. So, you look in Japan for a while, you've seen the world as a young man.

Yeah, Japan, Hawaii. Hawaii too, right? So, abroad, right, not in the mainland. And we're gonna get to that a little bit and by the way Crazy upbringing had his I think is your mom pulled a gun on you. It was absolutely did we need to get to that But you end up kind of like living in the streets so to speak there's a point in your life where you really live in the streets Right and I had different guys on the show like I didn't live in the streets But I grew up with dudes who lived in the streets because I looked really close to those guys

So I went to a school where like half the dudes lived in the streets and half of us kind of lived in the kind of the suburbs. And here's this interesting now that life's happened. Now I'm 52 years old. The guys who lived in the streets, a lot of them went the wrong way and carcerated, you know, or have been killed. But the most successful dudes, the few, are the dudes that lived in the streets. Not the dudes who lived on the good side of the tracks. It's really interesting.

It makes sense though, when you think about it. Why? Because when you're coming from the streets, like you have this, you're living for survival, right? And you're navigating, you're actually navigating life. Like I just came back from a fishing trip and I was telling you, but when you look at that, there's nobody out there that's teaching those guys

how to be fishermen or to be captains, right? It's something you see, you adapt to it, you understand, you grow through it, and you just become great at it. And when you come from the streets, you either fall to the waist side, or you become great at survival and evolution. And as time goes on, you just get in these different situations and these different rooms

that enable you to be your best version of yourself, which is a survivor. And as time goes, you start seeing different goals that you want to accomplish. And some of those goals take you into a wealthy space. Right. Because the average street guy, his whole, the good ones, the smart ones, by the way, because you got some people in the streets and they stay and end up there and it's... They just stay knock on heads.

Yeah, and it's all bad. But you have some people who understand that the streets is a stepping stone as you will. Like for me for myself, like I knew that the streets, I knew I couldn't walk from the streets into a boardroom. So I had to figure out that path and that path came with me understanding who I was, where I was going, and then what can I put in the middle

of that to give me some, to put me in a place with my reputation as solid, right? As far as business, because I made good money in the streets, I really did. I ran a Fortune 500 company, you know what I'm saying? Tax-free, but I did that. And I say, my money, and I did good things, but I know I couldn't just walk into a boardroom just straight from the street.

So that's when music came about, because I like, if I can figure this out, right, I can get credibility and I can take this newfound startup and figure my way into business because I don't think a lot of people know that music is about talent, but business has always been my passion. That's why I wanted to end up in it. You love business more than you love music. Absolutely. I certainly say. Yeah.

If 1000% because I enjoy music and I love it, but I was never the kind of guy that grew up with a notepad writing lyrics, being in a band. I was a music clean client. I just listened to music to learn. That blows my mind. Right, you know, because that's how I learned. It was like I listened to Tupac. I kind of learned the rules from the streets from there.

But to answer your question, it's just like, when you come in and you're coming from the streets, you have this insight that most people don't have, meaning that you can perform well in chaos. Yes. Okay. And I started to understand that. So as I got into business, that was my gift because these things were happening. People want to keep their job.

They want to keep their position. You know, they're emotionally tied to this. I'm not. I'm a problem solver. That's my gift. So all I got to do is sit back and look at it and go, okay, this is what we're gonna do. And be assertive about it

because I do believe that that's the solution for this, right? Because I came up in a place where, I don't wanna hear the problem, I wanna hear the solution. Right? And if the consequences are dire, so you play a little bit better, what's the game, the squid games? It's like, it's like in the streets,

you're going to either die or go to jail or you're gonna be one of the one percent that make it out. Right? So by the way, that's one of the best answers on the show ever and I'm like really glad I answered, asked you that question. I've always wondered this. So masterpiece that right there.

Right. And we had a similar conversation off camera. Right. And I said, why you, like why do you think you got out and other guys didn't? And so you said a few things. One of this is ability to learn to survive. Ability to operate in chaos.

Right. Masking one other thing. I think just like millions of people want to know the answer because you always hear this. Now that hip-ops become so popular in the last 20, 30 years, the streets, the streets, the streets. Right. And it's one thing to hear.

It's another thing like someone lives in this environment. Right. You think about your own shoulder. You're a 12, 13 year old young boy. Right. And basically the way that I read your upbringing is that it became this point where really you didn't have a lot of rules governing you in the home. You could kind of go out as late as you wanted.

So you're seeing these guys that become mentors to you. What makes someone become a leader in the streets? So I get that you function because so far, change the word streets and call it business. And guess what? Someone who wins in business has this unbelievable ability to survive through all of the lean years and they have a crazy ability to operate in chaos that most people don't have. In fact, I don't have a lot of abilities, but one of the things I always say is

one of the things I hold my hat on is, I operate well in chaos. Now, as a negative to it, that somehow I keep wanting to produce more chaos in my life, so comfortable in it. By the way, you got a little of that bug too. No matter how things go, I'ma find a way to create chaos. Because chaos gets cool.

I'm not comfortable when things are comfortable. Right, because it almost feels like you know if something's gonna come. But to your point when you ask how do you, someone become a leader. Yes. It's funny because Master P was in my, he was, he was my therapist before.

I even knew who he was. Because I listened to him and I watched him and I saw him move because you got to think coming from, we come from those that are only entrepreneurs we really knew that were very successful. All our parents were either hustlers, worked in factories, my mom, clean houses, you know, just minimum wage stuff.

But then you see in masterpiece and these guys, and he's mobilizing all these people and putting them in positions, you know, to, to, you know, live out their dreams. And you sit back and you go, okay, that's a leader. And then you see someone like Tupac, who's, who's a revolutionary, he's going against the grain of the fabric of what they're telling us where we're from. Like, you can't beat it, she can't do that. He's going to get all that grain. And that's a me, that's a leader. You know what I'm saying?

So these are the people that I'm listening to every day because they're my therapist at this point. Right. So like how people listen to you as a podcast, some people like just to be entertained, but you have some people out there who's listening to you or show that they're hanging on your everywhere because they know that you know the way.

So they would consider you a leader. And the thing I learned at the early ages, I didn't mind sitting down, being a fly on the wall, listening to the older guys. You know, the uncles, the cousins, you know, this the guys in the neighborhood. And a lot of my peers didn't see the value in being around older people.

It's kind of like, oh, you know, that's your uncle, it's your granddad. But older people always had that wisdom and that knowledge. And I had a thirst for it at a young age because when I came back from living abroad, I started, because my palate was different. I was eating sushi. Interesting.

You know what I'm saying? I was eating tuna and the sushi. Interesting. You know what I'm saying? I was eating tuna and the giri. You know what I'm saying? Yellowtail. And now they throw me back in the hood. And my palate's different. I don't see in the world. And I know there's beaches.

And there's all these things out there. And I got to go back to this town with the population. It's 3,000, maybe 32 on a good day. I mean, we got two red lights. And I'm trying to explain to my friends in school, like, yo, there's beaches out there, there's this and that and everybody's kind of like, what are you talking about?

Never seen these things, right? In person. So it sounded like you was, you know, just making all this up. And I got in my mind at that moment that I have to get back to that because that's my life. And the reason why that life was sticking away from me is because my parents separated in divorce.

My dad was in the service, so my mom went back to the hometown and my dad continued to do his tour as a staff sergeant in the Marines. Staff sergeant. And so when we went back to there, of course, my mom had her things and all that stuff going on. And it's crazy because the trailer that we grew up in was no bigger than the studio room. And it was, I paid $3,500 for it, right? And that's what we lived in.

You know, my room was probably, you know, the size of a bathroom and a, like, you know, you can barely even breathe in that, right? And for me, that was reality. So it's like you're ticking out of this life where you got all this opportunity and you putting this place. And I never forget it. Like, my whole mind says, switch from being a kid to survival. I got to survive.

I got to figure this out because if I don't figure it out This will be my life For the rest of my life. I'm believable. Right. This explains to me I really introduce you the way that I view you. There's a dimension and a depth to you And now that I'm understanding your life story a little bit more it's because there was dimension and depth to your early life Right, you really had two really different lives when you were a real man. And now you have multiple lives as an adult. The other thing you have after meeting you, it's the thing that I have in all my friends

that I admire the most. And then I'm just unpacking for everyone success traits. Because I really believe to a large extent, the streets, so to speak, which I don't understand, that's why I'm asking you, is a metaphor for life. It's just an exaggerated, compressed metaphor. And you have another thing that I think the guys who make it out, and also women and men who make it in business have, you have a very unique, nuanced combination of a lot of presence and confidence with a ton of humility still. You're not arrogant. You don't think you know everything. You have a thirst for knowledge.

You listen to my stuff. You read. You still have that thing. That is a combination. You show me something with a bunch of humility in their humble. With no confidence, I'm sure you someone life's going to run their ass over. You show me somebody with a ton of, and you've seen this in your business too, ton of confidence, but no humility, they eventually believe too much of their own press clubings. You agree with that? Yeah, absolutely.

They, they crop out because they, they don't have humility, they don't want to keep growing and learning, they think they know everything. They think they're never going to lose or make a mistake. Well, that's, that's the issue because, you know, I've learned and that's one of the reasons

why I really wrote the book because I wanted people to understand that I was selling millions of records like millions and millions of records right some of the biggest artists in the world are you on a J. Z. Kanye West. Ryan Kerry. All these people but how's the lowest point of my life you know I'm saying like I was at the lowest point of my life. You look at photos you can kind of tell. Yeah, I was playing through it. Because, you know, God works in mysterious ways. It's just like, he helped me figure out that this was the thing for me. I kind of got forced into it because I tried to do it master p did in the beginning.

As I tried to sign people and put people on, I wanted to be a CEO, the boss, so to speak. And it didn't work that way. And I was left with a studio, no artist, and not a lot of money, right? So I had to figure it out myself, and I began to do music myself, but because I always had a love for it. And I started to work my way through that.

And what I realized is, like, I wanted to bring everybody that I could because that's just what you're told, right? You're told that you've got to keep it real. Like you got to be and that's what I went by, you know what I'm saying? Because that's what's in my heart to do the right thing. And when I started to get some success in it, and started to move around the world and see different things, now mine, the life that I was living before that was serious, like serious.

I mean, put it, put it this way. Everybody that I was running with, either got life for 30 years, which is probably one of the biggest story sense, I mean, sense L-choppel. And you were waiting to get arrested yourself, right? 30 years which is probably one of the biggest story since I mean since El Chappell You know and you were waiting to get arrested yourself right? Yeah, like everyone around me is going down I was I was I was I was dependent on it like I I had it in my mind like I I Got myself when I walked out the door. Yeah, I made sure that I was looking good

Because if I feel like if they got me I just had to look the party You got a fair selling million millions of records and I just had to look the part. You got to be selling millions of records and I'm waiting to go to prison in my mind. That is crazy to me. And I'm drinking, I'm drinking, I'm self-sool and I'm doing all these things and I was like the most depressed I've ever been because a lot of those guys that didn't go

started to see my success and this caused in all our war. So you got to think I'm this hot new artist I'm moving around the world I'm doing all these things but I made a real war with real people that have real finances, real resources and their state, the state. This is not local, right? And I'm dealing with this everywhere I go. So normally when a person goes on the stage and performs in front of, you know, I'm on tour with Jay-Z. You know, we're doing 60,000 people a night. And he has no idea what I'm dealing with.

You know what I'm saying? So I'm like, you know, when I get off the stage, you know, I'm back and back that. I gotta get ready for whatever. I gotta make sure, like, I have to move militant, right? So now I got to make sure, because now instead of just being an artist, I have to be, you know, damn near a general. I have to give my troops orders and tell them how to move and what to do and how to, and it's

like this is every day of my life. You're worried you're going to be a two-pock at one point. And want to get incarcerated or you're going to be a two-pock? Yeah, I have some 100% and the thing, it took me, and I was depressed and didn't know what depression was, right? I had post-traumatic stress and didn't understand what that was. I had a level of anxiety that was unreal. I didn't even know what it was.

I just knew what it all had to do was keep drinking and keep smoking, And that's how I was going to deal with it. So you talking about somebody who was getting up at 8 a.m. I'm popping a bottle of crystal. That's how I'm starting breakfast off. You know what I'm saying about lunchtime. You know I'm drinking tequila. You know what I'm saying? And you know at night I'm still going out. I'm doing all these things to self-sool but I started to realize that like I'm running and I can't run that fast anymore. Like I'm thinking I'm getting away but it's catching up and it wasn't until my third album which was the recession that I woke up and I was just like, hold up.

I'm not in prison, right? I'm alive and I got a chance to be a superstar and let me embrace that. So I immediately went in, started YouTube and about health. Now I'm drinking water, I'm exercising. And by the minute, mind you, I couldn't get a trainer because I don't like to be told what to do. So I was thinking that YouTube myself, and I lost 60 pounds. We're going to put a photo up right, and I lost 60 pounds. Yeah, we're gonna put a photo up right here.

Yeah, I lost 60 pounds. And it was crazy because I was doing this show for the recession tour. The first show I had was in Boston and the House of Blues. And it was funny because normally when I did all my shows, it would be all, and I don't mean this like, you know, like, I mean, like it was, it my shows, it was the gangster killers

in the robber's, that was the front row. It was no women. And I'm saying, and when I dropped that 60 pounds ad, in my first show in Boston, I remember it like it was yesterday. I came out and by the second song, I looked at my security like, yo, what are you doing? They're throwing stuff on the stage.

And he looked at me, said, boss, it's brawls. And he said stuff. And I was just like, oh, yeah. Yeah, oh, yeah. So I'm like, dude, this is different. It's awesome. And I promised myself, like, I wasn't gonna go back. And then I just started to get on this journey of just trying

to like, I did what I did in the neighborhood, which was starting to sit around older people, get outside of my comfort zone, and just have conversations with people who I wouldn't normally have a conversation with. And just ask some questions because I started to understand that it was imbiased right and it would give me honest answers. And I started my journey to healing around that time. Of course I didn't have you know podcasts like yours and stuff like that, but I just was getting little bits

and pieces of information and trying to figure it out, right? And that started me on my journey, and that's when I started to really come into my startup and to start to understand, but mind you, the whole time I'm doing this, I'm like, okay, this is cool, but I don't think this is a life of me. Like, I gotta figure out how to establish myself as a businessman, because with this, one thing that I did understand, and I don't think this is a life of me. Like I gotta figure out how to establish myself as a businessman. Because with this, one thing that I did understand,

and I don't think a lot of people understand, is that the music and the reason why rap was one of the biggest genres last year is because music became the streets, right? And that's why so many people are dying it. So I saw so many people incarcerated. Because. That's why so many people are incarcerated. Because all the street guys, after me started to figure out, Jesus was in the streets, I know him.

I know Lil J, I know he used to be over there. I'm going to do that. Right? So everybody started to get in music, music, music. And then your next thing, you know, music was more about it than the streets. But I saw that coming, so I'm like, I gotta figure out how to do business,

because I don't want to go through this again. Oh saw that coming. So I'm like, I gotta figure out how to do bend it because I don't want to go through this again. Oh my gosh. Brother, that's striking what you just said. Yeah. Because now that you say it, I've obviously observed that happening, but you, to be on the inside of that. I'm picturing you walking out, you're torn with Jay-Z in the beginning and you're looking at the front row

and you don't know if any of these dudes are there for you. Oh right. That's amazing to me. Right. And then the fact that dudes like you then brought guys into the business who were already living that type of a life and it sort of transformed them industry from guys you talked about this stuff to go to the real thing. So they lived this stuff.

And this is the trip part. This is where it came in at. I knew early on that I was in a position to lead shit. Right. I understood that. More so than the artist. That's why I never claimed a position to lead shit. I understood that more so than the artist. That's why I never claimed the rapper role. I got to figure out how to do this

to be an example for the people that come for why I come from. Because I'm not gonna stop here. It's like being in the street, you don't wanna start, you know, petty hustling, and then now all of a sudden you got this connected, and you just stop there. I don't wanna go to jail there. You know what I'm saying?

So what I started to notice is that, and even now, you know, the, and the reason why I feel like it's more of my purpose and I have to lean into my purpose to show this generation behind me, how do you evolve in it? Because just imagine when I got in, it's just like Jordan versus LeBron, you know, and things like that, you gotta know

that this generation is getting away different type of money. So that comes with a way different type of power. So they're able to do things that we couldn't even do. And they're able to, you know, to, to, like just say, Francis, when you got money to throw around like that, you can make a lot of bad things happen. You know what I'm saying? And if your mind, and if your mind is set, isn't to lead people the right way, then you already know what I'm saying? And if your mind said isn't to lead people the right way, then you already know what that is. And I do want to say this because I don't want to sound like that I just had to figure it out.

Before everything, before the recession happened, which was maybe like four years, five years of me doing music, I absolutely led hundreds of men the wrong way. Right. Right. They would do anything for me. Right. They would jump off a cliff. They would do anything. And I was out of control. And I didn't know why I was going. My GPS was not working. So I led them to where I started to figure out. If we keep going straight, we're going to fall off a cliff. So let me figure out my life.

Now mine, when I started to figure out certain things about myself, it started to change things about myself. I don't think everybody around me was a fan of that. Sure, you know what I'm saying? Because people probably benefit from some of it. The other thing too is that I just wanna acknowledge one thing about you. It takes a lot of, I mean, it sounds like an overhooked word,

but like it takes a lot of courage to say what you're saying to decide to make these decisions. Because you could have continued to go down. It's hard to change things when the external results of your life are going pretty well. Yes. It's so difficult to do, but the internal part of your world was terrible.

But the external part of your world is going, so it's so, it's so difficult. Listen to me, literally, listen to this. But the external part of your world is going, so it's so difficult, listen to me that you're gonna listen to this, when the external stuff's going well, but internally, you know this is not right, I'm not happy, I'm not living right, I'm not, this is not my legacy, I wanna have, it takes major, you know what? To go, I'm gonna stop this right now, even though it's producing money, it's producing fame,

it's changed a lot of things, and sometimes things in life that are working for you, you think, well, that's why I'm successful, but maybe you're successful in spite of some of the things that end up making you win, right? I was thinking about the violence thing you said, a really good friend of mine, it's kind of a well-known thing, was running the house to pop smoke when he got killed.

And they were the owner of the house that he was running. And I was thinking about when you were just talking about that, how that industry that you're in still, to some extent, it's really dangerous for these young people still. I mean, it's a real thing. This is not for the cameras, is what you're saying. And social media makes it different, because it's easy to track people, it's easy to do.

That's exactly what happened in that case. Yeah, it's different. And I don't, I remember I had a party one time for puffing my compound in Atlanta and I didn't even know Papa. He was standing like maybe where you are right there. And when I heard it, it just hit me different because I can only imagine this kid who's getting out of Brooklyn, who's got this chance to start him.

And then you die in the heels of LA. Yeah. Just think about that. It's almost like, it's almost like backwards. You would think you would die where you was at. And the reason why I lean into it so much is because they have to see an example of someone growing up in this.

Because when I sit back and I think about two-pock, like, it's confusing because he was a before it's time, but I can only imagine what he would have been like if he was still been here and made his 50s or wherever he's at. And I've been one of the lucky ones that have, and I'm not going to try to dumb it down or nothing. Like, what I've been through, I don't think the average man can go through that. You know what I'm saying? And not just from the things that I was into, but just all the people that I've lost over

the years. I can go into the thousands. You know, people's, you know, the hundreds of funerals, just so much. And what it did to me is, and what I've been working through now is, and we talked about Lewis earlier, like me and me, and I've been really talking about it, just like, you know, it numb me. Like, you know, I couldn't really understand

what emotions were, right? Because once you lose people, and I talk about it in the book, a lot, you just get this thing, like, well, it wasn't me, so I got to keep going, because you're running. You're just trying to keep running and staying alive. And over time, I just got this thing where I felt like people were complacent. You know what I'm saying?

Because I just try not to keep too close or try not to show too much love because it's almost like you just never know, right? Brother, in a weird way, this conversation's happened such an interesting time. Without being personal, Andy for sale is a really good friend of mine. We were talking this weekend about

not the same thing but connected to it. We're both talking about how, even at the stage of our lives, we're just running and we're running and running and running and running. And although not for the same reasons, but all my relationships, I feel like, as I'm in the middle of this run,

I've just become really surface, there's no depth to my relationships. And it's just like, I'll get around to it. I'll get around to it. I'll get around, we were both saying, hey man, we're best friends, we don't even see each other anymore. Like it's on the phone, you're all right bro,

you're all right bro, you're all right. And then like a year goes by. And it's a part of life, like everyone's got to evaluate in a different way. Not the same thing as what you were going through. But like, how much of your life you're putting on hold because you're in this run that maybe like, some of these other things may matter more,

your friendships, your relationships, your the things in your life that matter. You said GPS earlier, you got this thing and that you write about about your something GPS. I want you to do my mental GPS. This is so good. I know what it is, but I wanted you to be able to say it. In my former job.

I've been very successful. And we called them plays. And one play, you could have millions of dollars in one play. You send your money to the wrong place, you can be broke again. And I went through that so many times. Like having it, not having it, not having it. I never robbed it took anything for me. Nobody always was proud of myself for like getting out and

figuring it out. And when I start to notice is like even when I lost things, I will get it back like 10 fold, right? Because I always had integrity. My grandmother raised me. She's Christian woman, very serious, Sunday school the whole nine. He's just speeches the man. He's just meek to the whole nine. But I really had a good heart. I just got caught up in the series. And one thing that I started realizing is if I just keep my integrity,

and my name is good, and my reputation is good, I can always figure out how to get it back around. Because one thing that I did learn about like in business, if your reputation is good, and you're a good person you and you pour into people no matter what it may be even at your hard time somebody might just point you at the right person or see you in the right direction because they know you're good and with the reason why I call the mental GPS you know I feel like there there will never be a time in my life where if I lost it all tomorrow that I couldn't get it back right because I

know I understand it and I know how to get back where I left, right? And then to keep up on that path. And when you from, when we from, when you lose it, you know, people go bad, you know, I'm saying not like Wall Street where they jump off buildings, but they're robbed their brother. Like they'll take from their best friend, you know, I'm saying they'll, And not just take, I've seen situations

where people murder their closest friends, you know what I'm saying, or kidnap, kids or whatever, and it's just like, we ain't a life like that, it's hard not to, because the sad thing is, the culture respects violence, more so than money, you know, and it's just like, you're gonna be a leader that leads with evolution, or you're gonna be a leader that leads with violence. And that's how it works, you know what I'm saying? So there's not a lot of

leaders that lead with evolution, right? Because those are the ones that, you know, something, you ever heard like when we talk, we say, well, all the good guys gotta go. Those are the ones that, you know, something you ever heard, like when we talk, we say, wow, the good guys got to go. Those are the ones that get killed. It's interesting. You say that the ones that lead with evolution end up experiencing the violence. Right. Yeah. You know, we're both thing.

I was thinking of Dr. King, right? I'm saying the same thing when you said it. I'm the man. Some of these kids and, you know, like Nipsy Hossam, great. One of my great, great, you know, Nipsy Hossam, he's a trade books. Nipsy was, he had a hard goal. And when you look at his situation, you, you can't Nipsey also used to trade books. Nipsey was, he had a hard goal. And when you look at his situation, you can't help but think like,

how could, you know, like this was somebody that was pouring back into the community, but he was leading with evolution. Yeah, right. And the guys that lead with violence, you know, end up being in these situations where, you know, they live longer. You know, they, they as a result to that,

I watched an interview you did, and you said, I really don't trust anybody. Right. And then the host pushed you a little bit, and you're like, well, that was my former life. And I watched, I said, nope, he still doesn't really trust anybody. Like, if we're being really, really honest,

like, let's just cut the, to the s***, right. I don't think you really completely trust anybody, even right now. I, you absolutely right. I don't think you really completely trust anybody even right now. You're absolutely right. Okay. But I find myself opening up more and being transparent.

But I still have to keep, you know, what kept me, even though it doesn't serve me that much in this life, I'm learning to trust and to understand and to get only quality people around. Because once you have only quality people around It's easy for them to show you that they can be trusted to a certain extent But I will tell you that 98% of people that I live it let in my life at Burt me This is some type of way, you know, I'm saying and to the point where I'm just like I already knew that was gonna happen Why did I even go there?

And my reason I think for not trusting is, I've never, outside of my grandmother, I've never experienced someone who gave me unconditional love, right? And I never experienced someone that gave me like full transparency. And, you know, I used to live out of survival and fear, you know what I'm saying? But I try now to live more out of love.

But, you know, I still can't like nipsy hustle. Like, I can't think that I'm exempt to what is going on because I'm still a part of that culture. So I have to still almost like's almost like being a soldier. If you go to Afghanistan or whatever, and you come back, you still have that mentality that I got to protect myself and my family if it's something happens, because I know how to do that.

I knew today was going to be good, but I know it would be this good. No, I mean it. Right. And I'm going to tell you something pull when you're this honest, you pull honesty out of me and other people. And here's the truth. So I'm not a part of that culture, but I'm a part of life. And I think that again, I think that culture is like a microcosm, a compressed version of what the rest of life is.

And if I'm being really honest, if I'm being really honest, same with me. I think even saying 98 is a generous number. Right. Maybe like 99.7324. Right. And I think what I landed on was I'm going to be trustworthy, but I'm pretty guarded with my trust. And life has proven to me. Right. And by the way, what's cool about that conclusion is that it's caused me to try to search for where can I trust. And for me, that's God.

Right. Right. Like, I don't put my faith in God. I tell you about that too. Please do. Because that's what I reached to. Please, go ahead. What we can say.

No, I, you know, I must, I must say like, I don't know what's been going on with me lately. I'm saying like the last year, but I used to pray all the time because my grandmother taught me to pray, but I never heard anything, right? I never put lately, I might be like meditating and he talks to me constantly. I love it.

And I'm serious to the point, it almost scares me sometimes. And nobody's perfect. So as long as I walk with God, I know I'll be good. But people, and the type of people that he's brought in my life like it's crazy like you wouldn't believe the type of people that You know call me check on me or whatever and a lot of them don't understand where I come from and what I've been through So, you know, they might not understand some of my mannerism sometimes But I make sure when I'm with him I'll let him know that I I'm really that phone and and they're there for me But what I what I've noticed and they're there for me.

But what I've noticed and you said about trust is like, I trust that God is gonna make sure it's good, but I still gotta keep the watch the front door for us. I'm saying, I can't let anybody in the front door. Yes. Cause that's our sacred space. And, you know, it's so interesting because you look at any part of life. I'm quite sure anybody can say that they don't really have people that they can trust.

And the thing about coming from, like what we come from, especially where I come from, I can't even say that about some of my closest family. You know what I'm saying? And it's just like, you would think you can trust your uncles. You would think that you can trust, you know what I'm saying? And it's just like you would think you can trust your uncles, you would think that you can trust, you know what I'm saying? And all these everything, and my older brother died when we was younger. So I had to be the oldest, right? So I had to kind of jump out there here first. And my experience with it just put me in a place where I just put up all these boundaries, right? And what I'm starting to notice lately is that, you know, that wall that I put up, you know,

it protected me to kept everything out. I mean, you know, kept everything out. Well, kept everything in, but it also kept a lot of stuff out. So a lot of my blessings that were supposed to come to me, they were out by the wall because I was blocking them, right? So I didn't take the wall down. I just took like the first three layers off so I can see over the wall. So I can see that's such a perfect description. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. The way that is such a perfect description. Right. Because if you don't have let people in, you are keeping out so many blessings in your life. Yeah. I think it's almost like for me like by the way, taking a few of those bricks, those levels off the walls, exactly what I've done.

You're saying things that either I haven't had the confidence to say, or the ability to say that I totally agree with. I love when I'm talking to somebody, and I'm like, because it makes me, it hits my heart, that's truth. Like, that's truth what he just said. That's what I've done too.

And almost a little bit, other than with God, I trust but verify. I don't have to verify with God. That's already been verified for me. And I also trust God will bring people into my life that can get close to me. But I also believe there's free will, there's free choice. And he's going to teach us lessons in life. There are Judas' in our lives, right? That's part of the stories of the Bible,

or whatever your faith might be. There's that. There's also though, it's really interesting, you could have written a book about a lot of things. You wrote one about adversity. Yes. And I'm like,

this is a ton of topics you could have done about overcoming limited beliefs, overcoming your environment, because you had, you transcended an environment which is very rare in life. Why is adversity the topic of the book? And why did you think this is the thing I want to talk about? Oh, wow, that's a great question.

That's what I pride myself in. You know what I'm saying? Like, I would be that adversity specialists, if you will. That's what keeps me going. That's my purpose. My purpose is to continue to evolve no matter what, but to continue to give that information back to my culture and to my people and to be an example of what it's like to come out of that.

Because every situation that I've been in and it's funny that we was talking about God, I don't care how crazy it got. He always puts somebody in my life around the time that I needed some information, or a year, or a connection, or just a process, it never fails, right? And I truly believe that he does that for me

to show people that you can maintain your integrity and be a solid individual and still survive, right? You know, without doing anything that would go against who you are as a man and then your legacy. Because you know, when you think about some of the great leaders, they did great things, right? It put their integrity is what kept you locked into them, right? Because you got people that successful,

but they did a lot of foul things. And when you hear people talk about them, you're like, wow, I never knew that. And adversity to me is that small glare of hope, because if I tell you what I went through in this book, your life might be totally different, but you might be up against the same odds. I can tell you that that's the truth.

My life is totally different than yours. But I see great storytellers tell me stories with a you meaning. So as I read your work, I didn't grow up like that, but I have my version of it in my life. And so the lessons in the book, the lessons in this conversation. I don't care what someone's life story is.

These are facts. Like you said something so important that God has sent you that person when you needed them, the information, the insight, whatever it might be. I want everybody to hear this man said this, and the reason that I want you to hear it is, he does that for you too. The difference is, you need to be an expectation

that he's going to and aware that he's going to because he has probably sent those people to you previously in your life. And if you're not aware he's doing it or open to the possibilities doing it, you will miss them. You will miss them. It's like that analogy of the people that are sitting on the roof during the flood.

Someone comes by and says, hey, jump on the boat, nope, I'm waiting for God to save you. Somebody just comes by and about, wait for God to save me. Third guy comes by and about. I'm waiting for God to save me. Then they drown and they get to heaven and they go, God, I thought you were going to save me. He goes, I sent three damn people in a boat. Get them the boat, right?

And so there's some, you have to be an expectation that God is gonna send you a blessing at some point. But if you're not looking for it and expecting it, you don't hear them or see them or feel them and then you miss them. You have to be in a good place, too, though. You have to be in a good place with yourself. I really realized that,

because it was times that I wasn't in a good place with myself. And there was just a bunch of noise. I let things on the outside of me control my emotions, how I felt. You know what I'm saying? I just had to come to a place where, and I'm not there yet, of course, but I just started to understand what peace was like

to get a little taste of that. And I started to understand what going inward was about. Because the minute I started going inward, everything changed, right? Because now I can't fault anyone in my life for what they've done to me. I have to look inside and see how I reacted or what I've done to contribute to that, and and I can't blame anyone else right and

for me When I started to understand that is when things start to slow down right because I wasn't present I could have conversation with people is all in the surface. Yeah, it's all good whatever I'm going but then I started taking time like to look people in their eyes and be like oh, you all right, man How you feeling like what's going on? And start to have conversations where I wasn't you know leading all of the conversation like you know You just tell me you know how you feeling what's going on and when people came to me I you know, you know, and I pride myself on having a lot of advice. That's just like my thing

You know I think I'm like, you know therapists among the crew, you know, Sam But you want to I actually bow to I say you know one is you know, the therapist among the crew. You know what I'm saying? But you're awesome. I accept that, though. I say, you know, one is, you know, do you want me to just listen? You know, saying two is, do you want me to tell you what I think? A three is, do you want me to side with you? Because I can do that too. You know what I'm saying? So I can be like, oh, that's crazy.

That should have never happened. And I start to understand because, you know, where we come from, it's hard for somebody to tell you how they really feel. It took me a while. I was 40 to tell somebody I was sad, while I was depressed. You know what I'm saying? Think about that.

Or I don't feel confident about this. You know what I'm saying? Or I might be concerned. Yeah. Because when you're that guy, you have to. Can't show weakness. Yeah, you can't show anything. You said earlier, I'm depressed. I'm drinking. I'm drinking a bottle of champagne in the morning. I'm going to. Can't show weakness. Yeah, you can't show anything. You said earlier, I'm depressed.

I'm drinking. Right. I'm drinking a bottle of champagne in the morning. Right. I'm going to tequila in the afternoon. You're eating. You're heavy. Right.

You're stressed. You're worried. You're running. You're running. Is there any one thing you did? It was only one moment or was it just an accumulation of things? You're like, that's enough. I can't do this anymore.

I would say this. I didn't have a purpose before it had. Hmm. I was just chasing money and trying to get out of my situation. And he did that. God did that for me. Took me out of my situation. And I'm four hours in, about eight million records, so crazy.

Like, but what am I doing for him? How am I continuing his message? What am I doing? He took me out of a situation where I could have a life sentence. It was there. I still don't know how to talk just that, by the way. I think about that all the time, but it was there, right? And I've lost so many people and I sat there

and I'm just like, yo, like, right now, I'm the issue. I need to work on myself because the things that I have going on inside of me is no way to lead anyone, right? And I'm making music. So I got millions of people listening to me and listening to what I'm saying. I'm not a saint, but I do got common sense, right? And it's just like I'm saying things that might affect people in different ways. But I'm like, and my thing is the audio got to match the video, right? So I'm like and my thing is the audio got a master video, right? So I'm saying I'm saying this stuff, but I'm doing something else, right? And I got to get online with what I'm saying, right?

So now I'm walking into and it was a scary thing in my life and by the way, this will be clear like I was met with a moment where I knew it was a moment meaning I was I was my first album came out. I was met with a moment where I knew it was a moment. Meaning I was, my first album came out, I was selling, and this is Statue of Limit Texans, by the way, anybody listen, I'm good. I talked to my lawyers about it. And I had to make a decision, which was one of the biggest decisions, I had to make a decision

what I was gonna do because I was trying to balance the streets and music and I had some small piece of success and I had to walk away cold turkey from the streets. Now mind you that mean depend on music right and when I did that I had three of those next tail turk phones that's what we used to talk on and all those phones had a lot of money on them. Like, I people owed me money. And I woke up and I just said, I'm not doing this anymore. I put the phones in the bag,

threw them in the trash bin, in my building, and I walked away, right? And that was like my first, like, okay, I'm gonna do this music stuff. Now, mine you about eight months later, I'm performing at a show and tear my vocal cords. Now, I can't talk. I got a record deal with a major label.

Oh my God. I can't talk. I got shows booked up from here to 2000, whatever. I can't go on the stage. And that was the first time he humbled me. He humbled me. He humbled me. He humbled me. He humbled me and I had to really look at this and go I'm so close. I'm this could happen. What do I need to do? And that was a lot of praying, a lot of confusion.

And then he let me live. I got a throat surgery that I didn't have insurance at the time. I imagine I had lembranthines, all this stuff and no health insurance. Imagine that. So I had to pay for my surgery with this stuff and no health insurance, imagine that. So I had to pay for my surgery with cash, and then I got back out there, and I started the same thing. And then that's when he hit me again with Bell's pausie. Oh my God.

He hit me with Bell's pausie in my face. For real? He hit my face. I got crooked and my mouth was, and it was like my eye was sh- With that from stress. That was God. Cause he let me live again, got crooked and my mouth was, and it was like my eye was sh- With that from stress. That was God.

Cause he let me live again. And I went back out and started doing the same thing. And was going about the same way. And after that, I was just like, you know what, man, I got to change something because I've been too blessed. You know what I'm saying? And now I'm looking at it and I'm going like, the next thing might not even be something I can recover from

And that's what started me to just start to understand that I got to start fixing some of my ways And then first started with like a lot of my personal stuff. I would do like, you know, just you know I came from a situation where if you sit down with somebody's like sitting down and you being interrogated I'm not gonna tell you the truth I can't you know know what I'm saying? It's like, it's against the cold and it might get me in a lot of trouble. But then I started to notice that a grown man

shouldn't have a lot. Even if it's gonna get him out of trouble. You know what I'm saying? So now I gotta change this. You know, that wasn't easy to do because I was taught to say whatever I had to say to get out of any situation. And now I'm having to work through this.

And I was like, first step and then it started going on different steps, different steps. And when I got to a place where I started to answer your question when I started to realize that I got to I got to do some work right I didn't know where I didn't know where to start I just started YouTube and stuff talking to older people telling I had my business partner, he's been my business partner for like 20 years.

I was just gonna sit with him and tell him what's really going on. I'm like, man, I got about five people trying to kill me. I got beef for these guys over here and that. And then this is happening, that was it. I was in the shootout last week. And now this is that, and I gotta go to California. And this is happening, and he's just like,

okay, okay, it's calm down. Okay, what are you concerned about most? And then we started to like work through pr, and he's just like, okay, okay, it's calm down. Okay, what are you concerned about most? And then we started to like work through primes, and he's like, okay, have you ever thought about reaching out to them and just having a conversation? But my thing was, you know, they're the opposition, so I gotta press, because I can't let my guys think that I'm trying to sort all these things out.

And I just start to understand that there is a such thing called conflict resolution. So that started to help me out a little bit as far as my life. And now I got in the space where I started having a little piece and I was able to start working on myself, like my health and reading books and just all these different things.

And that thirst for knowledge kickbacking, because I hate learning in school. When I was in school, like I dropped out of school in the sixth grade, I got my GED when I was in boot camp. That's crazy. And then when, like, in that around that time, it just hit me again. I just had this thirst for knowledge.

And I just started going around, asking people questions and thinking about this now. It went from me asking, you know, somebody that I knew that worked at a restaurant that I just felt like was had some type of prestige. From that point to me, calling John Maxwell, that I knew that worked at a restaurant that I just felt like was had some type of prestige. From that point to me calling John Maxwell and going, hey, I got seven questions I need to ask you.

You know John, you like shoot him at me. To that, to Robert Green, you know, to Robin Sherman, to all these different beat-coney, Tony Robinson. And all these, and not to like name-dry, but it's just like, I'm getting this information now to give back to the culture because I'm able to go outside of my comfort zone and get it. But this stuff helps me with my life as well. Like we started my Louis early.

Like, but I've always been that type of person. So the answer to your question, I got the information from the people that I respected at the time that I was able to mingle with. And I don't come as a, you know, my reputation exceeds me. Meaning like I don't come. And by the way, the most gangster's guys won't from it. The coolest guys you ever see.

They're not loud. They're not poised. They're like Denzel and American gangster. They're real smooth. But they will reach out and touch you. I can tell you, this is like an all-time great conversation. It's a real smooth. But they will reach out and touch you. I can tell you, this is like an all time great conversation. It's all time great conversation. A lot of things about you that I noticed.

One is like how soft of where you are. Just drive it out here. It's like, I think you're here today. Like there's millions of people who are me like, oh my god, this is unbelievable. But at the same time, lately on the show, God sends me the right person in that seat for me.

Like I've got some stuff going on in my life right now that's not great. And some of it's portrayal stuff with other people like we're talking about. However, I was just talking to somebody, actually, someone that's producing a TV show I'm doing right now. Literally, before you got here, I was driving out here. And I said, I know in a figure out what God's trying to teach me with this lesson. And that's one of the things you said earlier. It's like, what am I supposed to be learning from this? What am I supposed to be,

I'm not gonna get nothing for Eric Thomas' all the time. You better get something for your pain. Right. You know, and the other thing you do very well is a lot of times when you begin to teach things you're learning, you begin to own them more. So a lot of you that are learning things listen to the show, you don't teach it enough

to other people and the more you begin to teach it, the more you actually begin to live it. People think, I can't teach any of this until I'm living it. No, you could are learning things, listen to the show, you don't teach it enough to other people. And the more you begin to teach it, the more you actually begin to live it. People think, I can't teach any of this until I'm living it. No, you could say, look, I'm not good at this yet, but this is what I'm learning. And the more you begin to teach something, I've found in my own life, like not everything I've taught all the time, I was doing at the time, but I was honest enough to say I wasn't. This isn't me yet. Let me tell you, this is what so-and-so gave me advice on or what I know I need to change about me.

And the more I taught things, the more I own them. The other thing I've always wanted to know about you because, and I know the answer because it's in the book and in interviews you've done. But of all the people you collaborated with, one of the other things that holds people back in addition to, and by the way, I wanna step back, you play such an important role in culture right now

because of what you just said. There are not enough people reaching people in the communities you come from or young people. With this knowledge and information, the world's different. This isn't 30 years ago where you could just get a Tony Robbins tape. There are dudes like me, guys like you, people like John,

that this information's there, but it's not what most people from these communities are consuming on their feet every single day. And the fact that you're saying, hey listen, I come from this, let me teach you this. And this could be someone from a particular culture, a particular age group, a particular part of the world. That's why I do this.

This isn't podcasting is not a big source of revenue for me. I mean, I got business. That's real, right? But what it revenue for me. I got businesses. That's real, right? But what it is for me is, and by the way, serious, no, I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. We're in the middle of an negotiation right now.

That's a whole other story. But having said that, but I want to make sure that acknowledge you and the role that you're playing. And again, there's a combination of, you have to receive that. It's a fact, and the combination of your humility with your confidence is crazy. Having said that on the confidence thing. Oh, the recidivation. It's a fact and the combination of your humility with your confidence is crazy. Having said that on the confidence thing,

oh you wanted to know this. You find yourself performing with Jay-Z or you're in the studio with Kanye or whatever. And I know the answer because I know, but I want them to hear this. You had, and then you didn't really start in music. It's not like you had to have some massive imposter syndrome at some point.

Do I belong with these dudes? And then didn't you have stylistically a little bit different routine in the studio than other people would use, right? Because a lot of people listen to this and like, I don't relate to the story, but I relate to the emotional part of it, of chaos, of behaving a way that doesn't serve me,

of creating more stress in my life, and I also relate to the imposter part of this thing. You sold millions of records. You've literally collaborated with the best of the best, which makes you one of them. So did you suffer from that? What am I, dude, that's Kanye right there. What am I doing?

Did you have some of that? And stylistically, I think in the studio, not everything you did was the way they did things, right? Well, I recorded on orthodox because I was never taught how to record, right? So I didn't really, I knew music, but I didn't know how to actually put it together. So a lot of what I was doing,

it's like being on the golf course, and you see a bunch of people here, you just pick up some type of swing, and they're like, no, you're grip, right? So I'm doing that, and, but the thing about it was, the soul was in it, like the truth was in it. And I realized early, it ain't,

and what you say is how you say it, right? And I wanted to flag on another point too. What I realized early is that a lot of these people are very talented, like they can put words together, put songs together that you can never believe. Right. Right. But for me, it's the way that it's packaged up. Right.

And like you was saying earlier about all these people that I've met, they have the word, but I'm the vessel. So I'm the translator. So they give it to me. Then I process it and then I package it up and then I give it to them something that they can digest so That's with the knowledge but with the music Understood that I was talking to a specific group of people who really were the taste makers and

The ones that really had influence before influences these were the street guys that were running their cities in their town And we all had this code that we spoke in because we couldn't let, you know, the authorities into our culture of how we talk because that could get you 15, 20, 30 years just for talking on the phone. So I can have a whole conversation with you right now. We can, we can make a play for Mexico to DC, the Chicago and we can just be having a record conversation and nobody else would know that. But what I knew going into it is I knew the code, right? I knew this unspoken language. So I figured out how to put it in the music because I'm talking to those people who understand it. And they're the taste makers. They're the ones that know they're like, oh, he's one

of us. He knows exactly what he's talking about. And Jay Z and them understood that because Jay Z used to be from the streets as well. And a lot of things about Jay that I like is that I saw him on the road, because I was a Jay Z fan. I'm not going front like when I was in the hood. But what I loved about him was that he was always evolving. So when I met Jay, when he became the president of the dev jam,

I didn't look at him as an artist. I looked at him as somebody that I can learn how to survive from. Because the music part didn't even matter. He's surviving. Like he is in a place where he's got outside of a rap. He can do whatever he wants to do. And he's growing up in this. I never seen anybody else grow up in this

and keep their integrity and build their brand. That's what I wanted to learn from Jay. So I understood that. Now Kanye West was different because Kanye was more so artist. And I knew that, but he respected what I've done because I brought Kanye West out at this thing that we call birthday bass. It's like the biggest show in Atlanta. It's like 20,000,000 people.

And we had a record together called Put On. He never been in front of that many people that are like strict people. His audience was more broad, but he wanted that. You know what we all do. You know what I'm saying? And I put him in front of that. And I noticed that when I'm who's working on his album, Heartbreak, 808's Heartbreak, he called me, he's like,

you know I need you to come out to Hawaii. And I was like, well, for. So when I get out to Hawaii, he has this chalkboard out there. And he said, what would GZ do? And he had all his songs on there. He was playing the songs. He would watch what I would buy my head to.

And he told me, he said, you understand how to talk to them in a way that they understand. And it's simple. Because it is. You know, you have a conversation with somebody. You got me, what you say, say what you mean. But there's a way you talk to them

when they feel like, okay, he's with us, right? He's not, you know, and I was able to do that in a way that they understood that that was my win. Cause it was my win, that was my win. I was basically talking to the streets. Everybody understood what I was saying. And if you didn't know street lingo, you was kind of out of the conversation.

And everybody wanted to be in the conversation. And in the posture syndrome, I don't think I ever had in pasta syndrome. I've been around people that I felt like they wasn't who they say they are. And that's what confused me because I was doing everything that I said I was doing in my music.

So I felt like everybody should be that way. When I started to get around certain people, I'm like, oh, this is a persona. This is an act. This is like WWF. Like, I didn't realize that, but I'm like, oh, what does that mean for me then? Am I doing the wrong thing?

Am I doing the right thing? Because I'm living this. Like, I would live in Daphne this. You know Nelson Mandela, like, this is it. And this is all I know. And I started getting places like that where and this probably was a bigger mistake than anything. And I started getting places like that where I, and this probably was a bigger mistake than anything.

I kind of isolated myself from the culture of music. Probably the only person that do this that people don't really know. Like the people that I hang around every day are like regular people, you know, I'm saying, or people that I respect as far as their mental state. But you're not gonna catch me me in an entourage of rappers. That ain't what I do, because I don't consider myself a rapper.

I consider myself a man on the journey. I'm saying on the journey of healing, on the journey of learning, on the journey of understanding to show my culture. You can't let people box you and they just tell you. When this is all said and done, I'm not going to be a great musician. I could be a great father, brother, cousin, uncle, whatever, but I just can't be this one thing.

And once I start to understand that, I just put myself in a, because I want people to understand, this is what a grown man from the struggle is supposed to look like, and you take your wounds and you make a wisdom, right? And for me, it was just like, that was the only imposter syndrome.

I was feeling like they wasn't like me. You see what I'm saying? They wasn't the real deal. That's how I took it. Because it's almost like, you don't even believe in that, which is you're saying. You're like, you know, it's almost like a costume. You putting these chains on, you putting these things on,

and you're going like, but you wasn't like that in your form of life. I was just like that in my form of life. I bought a Rolex at 14 years old. You know what I'm saying? I had Lexus' back then. You know what I'm saying? Everybody that was from where I was from knew that that's how I was really living and

that's how I was really, you know, conducting myself. Right? So when I got into the music, the music was just a way to, you know, to amplify that, but I still had what it takes to survive in the streets. And if you go to any penitentiary, any neighborhood, anywhere that anybody congregates on survival, they know who I am. I know you.

Right. And nobody sees me out like, yo, I love the last time you did none of it. It's just like, hey bro, you changed my life. I love you, man. I'm praying for you. I just want the best for you man. And you know, protect GZ at all costs.

And that's the part that I can't let them down with. So that's why I refuse to give up that part of me that's who I am as an authentic person just to fit in somewhere. So when you see the music thing going around, like you might not see me there. You know what I'm saying? I started out by saying,

I introduced you with, I said, this man has tremendous dimension and depth. Right. You're, am I right, everybody? Just am I right? This is not what you would have expected just from this conversation. Let me ask you one last thing.

By the way, I've enjoyed this so much, doing other books so I can have you back. Oh, for sure. By the way, you really need a book to come back. Come back. But I would like to continue this conversation back. Oh, for sure. By the way, you really need a book to come back. Come back. But I would like to continue this conversation because I feel like we're just scratching the surface of you.

I also have a funny feeling that if I see you, we're going to be friends now. For sure. We've been in each other's phones, but we're going to be friends now. I like it, yeah. I have a funny feeling that in a year, there'll be a new, different version of you sitting in front of me.

That's the thing that I'm most excited about with you. You, is this all worth it? So you've been through a lot. Like, take someone into success lastly. Like, if it was worth it, what parts of it are worth it? Like, you know, obviously for you, if you didn't get out of where you were you're probably dead right so in that tense It's definitely worth it But do you know what I'm saying like is six let people on the inside of success

So let's just be it look here are some most people are success. They want to have some fame They want to have famous friends. They want to have a bunch of money You just down in Cabo fish and doing your thing. You've had all the cars You probably dabbled and had some nice experiences with ladies in your life. You've been a little party and do whatever the heck you want. You've had to do a lot of sacrifice and stuff too though. So was all of it worth it? And if it was why, like what parts of it are worth it?

And what parts of it aren't what you would think it's all cracked up to be? Good question, huh? Good, great question. I think when you say think it's all cracked up to be. Good question, huh? Good, great question. I think when you say worth it, I say absolutely because everything that I've been through has molded me and shaped me to be the person that I am, the man that I am. And when you're in the wild, you see a lion,

and you see his mane, and you see his eyes, and you see the way he protects the pride, right? He's been through some things, he's been through, he's been fighting his whole life, but he's there to protect them. And in a weird way, I feel like I'm here to protect my culture, because there's no big homies. Everybody gets rich and they go, nobody gives back. Nobody, like, and I don't mean like money. I mean, nobody pushes hope and knowledge and all this stuff into these kids. They just go get their money and go live their life.

And the reason why I say his worth is because if I hadn't went through what I went through, I don't think I would know the type of people that I know, right, and able to have those conversations, right? And if I didn't go through that, I wouldn't have enough credibility to even speak for us. You know what I'm saying? It's just like, how could you, you know,

it's like being a, where you like a general, but you went to college and you never had any wartime in. And then you get on the battlefield and try to tell people how to do that doesn't work. The only part that I think that I feel like I'm still struggling with was the worth it is because when I was in the streets, I put a wedge between me and my mother. Of course, we had a toxic relationship, but I put a wedge in between us because I loved

her. And in my sister as well, but I always felt like if I went to prison, I don't know what that was gonna be like. If I truly was connected to them the way that I was supposed to be. So I kind of, you know, put a wedge in between this and just winning live my life.

Like I was just doing the things that I was doing because I felt like if I go to prison, at least I'm not gonna feel like, I'm not gonna tell them nobody because I can't, but I'm not gonna be in there like going through it because I already them compartmentalized, you know, my family, which I had started doing that a lot,

like compartmentalizing things, and I was good at it, right? It worked for me. Keeping it cold on me. Right, keeping it cold. So that's the only thing I feel like for me, right? It worked for me. Keeping it cold on my mind. Right, keeping it cold. So that's the only thing I feel like for me. And then I think the only other part is, like, you know, life is crazy, man.

Like it's like, it's so real when you're from where we're from, man. And I just think that all the people I lost, I wish I could have loved them better. Right, I could have gave them more of me because I just lost one of my friends. Maybe about last year was last about eight months ago. So one of my great friends and he was a good dude, family guy, four kids. And he owned a local club in the city.

And I've lost, you know, thousands of people, you know, just do people I know another, you know, just over my lifespan, right? But that would hit me the hardest because I'm like, how was somebody in my age bracket? Very successful and still being murdered and killed? And it hit me different because I'm like I talked to him about maybe a couple of weeks before this happened and I didn't even think to ask him how he's doing as he's straight so when you say worth it I think what I'm able to get back is worth it but I think that the relationships that I danced over I don't I don't think that part was worth it because these are good people, right?

And now, I gotta live with that. But going forward, I make sure that I'm connected, talking to people and doing the right things. But I can definitely tell you this because I wanna end on this one. The girls weren't worth it. The cars weren't worth it. The cars weren't worth it. The money wasn't worth it.

The lifestyle wasn't worth it. None of that stuff is going to matter when you go over. And the way that people idolize and put these things on the pedestal, none of that can compare to like real people and real love and real friendships and just really build them, bro. So I'm gonna leave that there, you know. You're a good man. Thank you brother. Thank you. I'm gonna receive that. I admire you. I'm really proud of you too. Thank you brother. I I, uh, I really enjoyed today a lot. Yeah.

Thank you for letting us into your world too because the vast majority of people listening to this don't understand that world. Right. And I do think, again, I'll say for the third time, I think there are some parallels that are unbelievable to the world. I was picturing you talking earlier, and I'm just thinking about this like, we started out with your mom with, you know, having a gun to your head and you see all that stuff as a young man. And I'm just picturing because there's this clip I think of when I think about you, which

is when Obama did it a couple times, but Obama shouted you out like a foreign, honest dinner. Yes. Yes. Yeah. I'm just thinking about how remarkable life can be that this young boy, this young man, right, who's living in this situation where he's in the streets, he's surviving. He's buying a Rolex at 14, his mom's got a gun to his head.

Somehow that young man ends up having, as a young man, but particularly a young black man, having the first black president shout him out and say his name's like, if that's possible, anything in life is totally possible. And then to go from what you were doing and how you were living to now be in one of the most, I think important men in culture,

influencing a part of culture with your message, your wisdom, your insight, paying it forward, continually to pull from one world and giving it to the other is just awesome, man. It's something to receive. So, so you're a blessing and I'm great for receiving that brother. Yeah, it's a fact. All right, everybody, I told you. Yeah. This is one of these.

I started out with an intro and then from the very first second, it just did better what I told you it was gonna be. I'm so this happened when I was supposed to We're supposed to this a while ago, and I couldn't do it and you couldn't do it the timing was absolutely perfect Thank you Ed. You continue to do what you're doing brother. Yeah, we we love you We listening just keep just keep pouring in brother. We are like all I thank you likewise, brother Love you. Hey, share the episode everybody. God bless you max out This is the end my let's show.