THE ED MYLETT SHOW - Overcoming Stress And Anxiety To Produce Beautiful Music In Your Life w/ Brett Eldredge

Episode Date: May 17, 2022

This week I’m honored to release a truly life changing conversation with my friend and country music superstar Brett Eldredge.We go incredibly deep… I mean incredibly deep!On mental health, anxiety, imposter syndrome and so many other things that I know many of us struggle with. As a bonus, we discuss his peak performance strategies as well.A remarkable REVEALING PEEK behind what it's like to bare the deepest parts of your SOUL while constantly living in that public eye.Brett had the courage in this interview to be as open as anybody who has ever been on my show. I know his strategies will help you and his vulnerability  will inspire you.You're going to hear some straight talk about Brett's struggles with PRESSURE AND ANXIETY and the enormous ongoing responsibilities of having to write songs that the record company, his fans, and he likes as well.  Like many other talented entertainers, Brett has also dealt with IMPOSTOR SYNDROME and handling CRITICISM. You'll also be especially interested in hearing his battles with DYSLEXIA and how he fought to overcome that unique challenge.He also talks about the time he almost walked away from it all and whether all the SACRIFICES have been worth it.  Despite his battles, Brett has maintained an even-tempered approach to his career. He is a role model for people trying to break into the business and wraps up our talk with some GREAT ADVICE FOR CHASING YOUR DREAMS, whether you want to be a country music superstar or anything else you want to pursue in life.So… kick back and relax for a spell.  Brett’s got some great stories to tell, and you're gonna want to give them a listen.

This is the end my let's show. Okay, welcome back to the show everybody. Today's an honor for me. I'm such a huge fan of this man. I happen to believe that he has the greatest male vocalist voice in the world. I have two favorite vocalists. I have this man and Chris Stapleton, I think, have the two best voices on the planet. And he's a highly decorated awarded country music

star, but he's really just a music star. But today's not going to be what you think. We're going to talk a little bit about music, but we're going to talk a lot about life, mental health, morning routines, because he's a personal development addict and expert as well. So my friend Brett Eldridge, welcome to the show, brother. Hey, thank you for having me, man. It's a long time coming, man. I've been a huge fan of your show. You got me through a lot of tough times in my life and just growth in my life.

So I'm excited to be on the other side of the microphone on this one and get to actually chat with you and dig deep with it. Thank you, brother. And everyone, listen, I meant what I said. He has an album coming out called Songs About You. It's out June 17th. I've listened to the entire album.

I told him it's my favorite album I've ever listened to in my life. And I'm not just saying this because he's on the show. The first three songs I listened to, I'm like, okay, that's the album. You know, you most albums, there's like a couple of three good songs. You're like, all right, that's the album. And then it just changed and got better and better and better. And so, first off, I just want to acknowledge you and why now I've been reading a little bit, like you held off a little while to make another album, tell them why.

Yeah, there are pressures in this business to feel like you always got to be putting out something and put, you know, the thing with me is that I want it to be important to me. I wanted, I want it to be from a real place. And I had a whole album written last year that was ready to go. And it was really good and ready to be recorded. But I really, I felt like there was a little bit more, like I could go a little bit deeper. And so I got back at the beginning of the year.

After all, my Christmas show just got right off tour and went right into this record and pretty much beat the entire album because I just went a little bit deeper and it was the best thing I've ever done was just to keep, just to test yourself a little bit more if you just go a little farther into that, and I found that flow state, you know, that kind of state of like every song I was starting to write

was like exactly the space in the map and the place that I wanted to write and sing in and it was like, oh, that's why you, that's why you go a little farther in life. It makes sense now. Isn't that true and everything? No, I mean, the more you can push yourself and just go a little bit deeper into who you are,

what you stand for, what you believe in, is really where the creative process, all of us are artists. I mean, I think sometimes people, like, well, yeah, Brad Elders and Arz, he's born with this amazing voice. He's trained himself to be so great. But your life is an art form. And life is part science and part art. And the way we express ourselves every single day is our human version of art. And what I was interesting for me because, you know, I've got to know you a little bit

the last few years, you know, just, you know, us corresponding back and forth. And I just didn't realize how open you were about this word pressure you use, which may be self-imposed. I'm not sure. Oh, yeah, both. Talk a little bit about your journey with that, your anxiety. I mean, you had some panic attacks from time to time, right? Like what is that? And how have you dealt with it? Well, I am definitely a recovering perfectionist, for sure. I am definitely a somebody who's trying my best to give myself a little bit more grace and respect

in my life through the years because I've always, it's also made me successful, but it's really beating me down. You know what I mean? It's just like, man, I just, if I don't, there were points in my career and my life where, when he first moved to Nashville, I've always thought of it as like Disney World. Everything just feels magical and you see all the amazing things

and it's beautiful and everything's magic and nobody's gonna stop you. And then you get a peek behind the curtain and you see all the things that crank, you know, and it's just like it kind of jage you a little bit, kind of jolt you a little bit and it kicks you back. And so I really had to learn once the business frame came in and the pressure is and everything, it kind of took away my soul a little bit. And I was getting ready to go on stage and instead of just going up there and singing and, you know, there'd be a point when I first started where I wouldn't even think about my voice, I wouldn't think

about how good I had to be. I was just me. And then the pressures of life piled on, piled on, and you got to sound just like your records in my head. I'm telling myself that no one was really, really even telling me that, but I'm telling myself. And, and I got the point where I'd almost pass out on stage. I would sit on the back of my bus and just like wait all day till the show is going on. I was just a mess like, and nobody knew it though, because when you saw me, I was smiling and I was, you know, I was on social media all the time. I was doing things that I had this persona is like the most laid back, chill guy.

And I really am that guy in some ways, but I'm also like, you know, really quiet, introverted and not always that guy. And I was always playing off as that thing. And those pressures really got to me. And I would, yeah, I would get into panic stage. And then I would have to go in front of 10,000 people and once I got into the show, I loosened up a little bit, but there was a while where I was white and knuckle on the microphone stand, holding

on to it. I'm only in the third song and I'm worn out. And a lot of the fans didn't know that. I got to the point where I was like, this is not a way to live, you know, this is not a way to, I was supposed to love this thing. I was supposed to, this is supposed to be my craft, this is supposed to be what I was born to do.

I'm feeling like I'm just barely hanging on. And so I had to change and it took a while though because you know, you don't really know, I grew up in a little town called Paracelanoi, beautiful place to be from, but like I didn't know anything about therapy. I didn't know anything. I mean, not that was the fault of me, but it just wasn't a big thing.

You know, it wasn't like a social thing. And when it was, it was like, you go to therapy in the movies and you're laying on a couch and, you know, the whole every scene and you know, or people think you're crazy or something. It's like, and so it took some panic attacks. It took me going on one point. I was on the today show, I believe, and I had a panic attack on the today show. Nobody knew it. I don't think I've ever even said that. I said I've had panic attacks, but basically it all triggered from an interview in Scotland

and I was, I was like, I got up, I was jet lagged, I was going one behind another artist and I was feeling comparison, a little bit of the imposter syndrome I was feeling, you know, probably too many coffees. It's like all these things and I had a panic attack that triggered me into more panic attacks. Basically, I had it in front of a crowd. Nobody knew I thought I was going to throw up on stage in front of all these people, just talking, which I had never had a problem with that in my life. And it was like a car wreck in my head.

It was like a very scary experience. And to only me though, but to me, it was as scary as it gets. What's interesting is that, you know, first off, I told everybody today was going to be a remarkable. I just didn't know we're going to go this deep this quick. Let's go, man. And I love you. And I appreciate you for doing it because he's one of the biggest stars in the world. He doesn't need to tell you these things. And it's an interesting thing. When I unpack something, you said it because I relate to it. Number one, I have to also be transparent, which is that we have these things, these

behaviors we do that we know don't serve us all of us do, but we've somehow linked to doing it in our mind to part of our recipe to success. And we go, if I drop this, maybe else goes away, if I drop my stress, if I drop my, you know, this pain I put myself through to get, and it could be a sales call, you know, it could be people that are out there and sales right now. It's the, it's this, I got to get into this state where I'm miserable all day until the meeting. And then after the meeting, maybe the meeting's fun.

Then after the meeting, there's this down, I'm even more miserable. But guess what? I got the sale. Yeah. That's part of my formula. And guess what? You know, I got my CMT award. So this must work for me, right?

Yet it's this debilitating thing. I was just talking to another, I won't say who, but he's a very, very well-known pastor who's a great orator. And we were both sharing with each other, frankly, the thing that you have as well, that we've had where we're just like the pain of doing, the actual doing of the speaking or the singing

or the sales call is joyous. It's the before and the after that's just, the self-loathing afterwards. I should have said this, I could have done that. You know, for you, I missed that note or whatever it is. It's off key and you probably really weren't. But so how do we begin to say, well, no, that's probably,

I'm actually being successful in spite of this behavior that doesn't serve me. Give us one thing you did where you're like, look, it was just the awareness that you're doing it or was there a particular strategy. I did a few different things and I'll, I think it all kind of ties together for the performances instead of sitting in my bus all morning, thinking all day about what I, because it's a huge sacrifice of your life to go out there on the road and you're pretty much you wake up and I get up early early I get up early and then I don't play till nine o'clock at night and then I'm just thinking about what that like you were just saying that build up

Of like all the way to the big moment whether it's your big sales call or it's whatever I Was only thinking about performing. What's my voice feel like? What's this? What if I pass out on stage? What if this? I was playing the What If games and totally self-doubting, because completely destroying myself and mentally. And so I did a few things. One thing I started to do was I would go out for hikes.

I got outside, honestly, getting outside was a huge thing for me. But prior, it's like getting out of my head and into my life. The moment I get out of my head and into my life and into like just being is so powerful. So that was a huge thing for me. So that's a big step of like killing some of the time. Or actually not even killing it, but being in moments other than right here, I'm in the woods I'm looking at these things. I'm playing Whiffleball outside with my band or whatever it is that you might want to do and then Before the shows I would start a pre-show dance party So we'd find this the craziest song you can think of like some will pick a crazy song and I'm like, we'll pick a crazy song, and something that's not gonna make you take life so serious.

And we dance, we dance as crazy as we possibly can for the show. And it's so fun, and it really realized just anything to take that nervous energy off and to realize that this is supposed to be fun. You're taking yourself way too damn serious, and that's- That you just nailed it. I was gonna say something.

I want to just jump in with you because, you know, you and I have texted about some of these things a little bit too or DMed on it as well. That's the thing. We all have a tendency to take ourselves too seriously. And I'm talking about everybody, even those of us that, you know, you think, no, I don't do that. I'm just really hard on myself or I'm down on myself. No, you're taking yourself too seriously and you're creating weight.

Yes. The bigger deal you think you are, the more weight you're creating in your life. I think one of the huge things you've said so far, when you're supposed to enjoy it, but two, don't take yourself so seriously. And I think, you know, for people that are going to climb to success too, Hey, more and more people taking you seriously can sometimes cause you to take yourself more seriously as well, right? The more success, the more money, maybe the more accolades.

And you could just be someone who used to work in another company. Now you're running your own more people take you seriously now. So you put more weight on you taking yourself seriously. Absolutely. And I think that this could go for anything too is when I would get on that stage and I would be in that kind of heightened mode of taking myself so serious. I also learned the craft and this is through therapy and this is through just digging in and listening to your show and listening to other people that are, you know,

brilliant in this world of helping figure out life, you know, is trying to always learn and grow. And it was like, there's always somebody somebody whether it's in a room of five people or a room of 20,000. There's always somebody that needs to hear the message you're about to say. And I look for that person in the crowd when I'm broken on stage and they don't know it. And when I'm in a tough spot, I look for that person that needs me and I need them. And it's like a connection that is so powerful that it takes me out of my head and it takes me to the reason that the whole reason why I got in this in the first place and why I feel like I'm on this earth. Whoa, whoa, whoa. You know,

I, wow, I have this thing with you where I, you know, I don't know whether you're, I don't know how to describe it. If you're gifted and you know, I don't know whether you're, I don't know how to describe it. If you're gifted and you've worked at your craft because this voice he has you guys is, he could have decided he was going to be, you know, sing the blues. He could have done jazz. He could have done, I mean, any type of music. I mean, his voice is just butter.

It's so good. So sometimes I think, well, that was your calling. But the more and more I've listened to you, and the more and more we've communicated, and even today, I'm like, wow, I wonder if you're calling as a way past even music, because the way you reach people, you have this thing you say, and you just started to touch on it. I wrote it down, because I want you to talk about it. You said, we are all put on this earth to connect with one another. Yeah. I think oftentimes people go, well, yeah. Of course, Brett does. I mean, he's in front, yeah. Of course, uh, Brett does. I

mean, he's in front of millions of people singing and everybody knows him and all that stuff. But, you know, me, I work in a cubicle somewhere. Yeah. I was put to connect with people. What would you say to that person? Yeah. I would say, I mean, take about some of the most random, random conversations you've had on and tough points in your life for the little things that just turned your day around just a little bit. You know, I was, you've had on and tough points in your life. The little things that just turned your day around, just a little bit, you know, I was, I've had some people pull me out of a tough place in my life that are complete strangers and they had no idea

that they pulled me out of a place just by showing up. And I think showing up for that connection and there's been times in my life where I, it's a lot easier to stay in that zone of, hey, I can stay in this little box all the time and not go out and connect and not reach out for help and reach out to help. You know, reaching out to help is just as important

as reaching out for help as well. It's like, because you know what it feels like to need that help. And I think just being open to that connection with a stranger to anybody and just being there as an open ear, I mean, I think that's, that's everything. So as a songwriter, you know, I have that opportunity, yeah, to a storyteller to connect with somebody.

That's reason why I do it. It's like these stories, I know somebody needs to hear that story and it could be a stranger. And I get that opportunity And it's such a beautiful thing. I live that is why I sit down and I write these songs and that's why I get up there on that stage Even when I sometimes don't feel in the right headspace You know when I can really remind myself that that really that really brings me back to it and it doesn't have to be on stage. It can be anywhere in life. to it and it doesn't have to be on stage. It can be anywhere in life. You're imposter syndrome thing.

Is there something? I mean, you know, I read about your childhood. It looks like a good one, but was there? Yeah. You think there's something installed in you when you were young because I have this theory that a lot of our patterns, a lot of our beliefs, a lot of our limiting beliefs, were sort of installed in us when we were a bit defenseless

as children by loving people, by well-in-depth people like my dad Loved me cared about me. He really believed in me But my dad had this thing he would oh, I mean I'm 45 years old my dad would hang up go hey be careful Be careful with my dad's favorite thing to say to me was be careful and I didn't it seemed harmless But I've heard that from my father maybe before he passed like 5,000 times Yeah, I think there's an embedded message in that when you're young like, Hey, bad things are going to happen. Yeah.

Is this isn't going to last forever? You know, when I started taking my own meanings from it and I was part of my chaos in my life was like, Why do I not? Why am I not enjoying this more? Why do I feel like it's going to end? Why do I feel like I'm faking it all the time? I used to really feel for a long time. I still do sometimes.

This is a fluke. They're gonna figure out this is a fluke. I went on a pretty good run and then that was it. Is it from your childhood that you can conco- or do you not know? That's a brilliant way to think about it. And I think it's really important to be able to look at that because I am so blessed by my childhood.

And I had my parents did as good as possible job as they ever could. I mean, I'm so fortunate. But it's like my mother was a warrior. She's the mother. She's a nurturer and she always worried. And not a bad way. Her mom was a warrior.

And passed that down. And it also protected me in some ways. It also made me a little bit like, oh, my voice is tired. Oh, I got to think about that all the time. And I, you know, that's, it's going to break out. And if I, if it's a little tired today, then how am I going to make it through this show? And then, you know, and that, but she just,

she's just looking out for me. Yes. But, you know, there's these little things. And then my dad is, he believes in worth ethic. And you know, did you shoot 100 free throws today and did you practice in the basement singing? Did you do, do you see any songs? And not as a, not as like, out of anger,

or thing, or anything in bad intentions. It made me successful. And I'm as close as can be with him, but I still, you know, and he was just trying his best because he wanted the best for me. He solved the best in me. Yes. And but I still hear that is like, I did, I, right before I started with you today, I was, I did my vocal lessons. And I was telling my, I was telling myself, I was like, I've been doing my vocal lessons today. I miss vocal lessons today, then I'm not going to be practiced for that show. I'm not going to be ready.

So and then it's probably all the way back from, did you practice in the basement? And it's not as fault. No, it's just those things that you like, it's, it also made me who I am. But it is wild to come. And what you're saying is right, emotions are negative or positive. Just too much of one can be fear. It's actually a healthy thing to some extent. Fear was given to us back in the caveman days

so that we didn't get eaten by T-Rex. It's fear helps you focus. Too much fear paralyzes you. That's the irony. And a lot of things in our life are caught not taught by our parents. So we catch things from them, meaning by the way, and they love us, we can catch their emotions though.

Yeah. Your parents emotional home oftentimes can become years by catching it caught, not taught. I know one of the things you've done a great job of is structure and come a real routine person where I don't think you want to briar. So tell us, let us peek in. This is Brett El, just one of the top people in the world at what he does. And he has a structure that's helped him overcome some of these, whatever you wanna call them, mental health, anxiety,

you know, peace issues. What are some of your routines? I have to put on my armor in the morning. You know, I have to, I have to get up. I gotta, I gotta do all the classic stuff. To make the bed, brush the teeth, do the journaling. I actually do, I made my bed brush for teeth, get some natural light in my eyes, like, open up the windows as simple as that, and then do a 10 minute meditation, sit there and just

kind of sit with silence, and then I journal, and it's kind of right down the good, the good bad or whatever I'm feeling. You. And then I, and then I set an intention about, you know, what am I going to do today? I'm going to try not to be so hard on myself, you know, today. I'm going to be, I'm going to be a little more kind of myself and let whatever shows up show up and, and still going to have a good day regardless, you know, and, and start to have in that. And then I I would go I got to get exercise

Is that so huge saying for me is this is skitting out getting in the gym and If I spend some time with my dog, you know, yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely. You got a dog name Ed I mean how good is that that's it? I know you love your dog, so I do. You know, Lily and me. I do, but you have that. Do you do any cold plunge? Yes, so I skip that. So I've been playing with that a little bit lately.

Sometimes I do it before workout, sometimes I do it after. But yes, I'm really into the cold. I'm a firm believer in that. And cold showers that I've done now Now I'm I'm trying to get a cold plunge tub because I was using my pool, but now it's not, it's really hot in Nashville now, but it was, you know, the pool is like at 40 degrees. That'll wake you up real quick. But I, you know, all this stuff, wow, anything else. Yeah. Let's see. I do all that. I limit my phone time. Yeah, let's see, I do all that. I limit my phone time.

So that is one of the things that really drives my anxiety through the roof. And I mean, we know why now. I mean, it's like it's the dopamine rush all the time and then it wears you out. But I used to be really active to an unhealthy level on social media, but it was huge for me. But I found myself on it so much

that I was being that guy that was always happy and top. This is back before I was being vulnerable and just saying, oh, you know, and so when I speak on social media now, I'm just more honest to how I feel. But back then, it was like, I'm smiling. You can't ever see me not smiling. You can't ever see me not feeling good. The happy go lucky. I'm singing to my phone. I got my dog here. I got all this stuff. And then I realize this is not, these pressures, or not pressures are really anybody else created.

I kind of created it myself, but now I got to keep up with this. And so I dropped that. I dropped that. I still have a smartphone now, but I got a flip phone for a while, but it was crazy. I got a Polaroid camera. I'm not saying everybody needs to go do this, even though I think it's a great practice

if you want to try. And then I just shut it down for a little bit. And it really made me kind of reassess how I viewed it all. I still think social media is a great tool. And it is what that is, it's a tool. It's not your life fully. And so I limit my phone time now, where you can set a screen time limit on your phone.

And the trick is though, a lot of people will set that, and then you can hit ignore, like once your two hours goes up, you just ignore. Well, I learned that if you said a past, you have somebody else set a pass code, you can't get back through it. No way. No way. So I'll have somebody I know in management or my brother or whoever, hey, to set this

pass code and then when this, when I can't get back on it, because you know, wow, apps are built for you to go a little bit longer. I'll just look at a couple more things or watch a couple more YouTube videos or whatever it is. Once it sets me out, I'm out. And so when I'm actually on social media, I'm mindfully not just scrolling as much. I'm posting videos.

I'm doing the things that mean the message that I want, and then I'm taking the content that I feel you know serves my soul the most. And then if I run out of time or out of time, I just stole your idea. I'm gonna do that. I'm actually do that. That was for me. I need to do that. I limit my time, but the truth is I break that promise four or five times a week. Absolutely everybody does. I'm gonna do that. I'm gonna have my team change their pass codes and I'm like, you cannot give me this thing back. Exactly. Because it is the great, it's like emotions.

It, you know, some of it's good and a lot of it's not. Yeah. Some of some social media is great and being on there too much is such a presence stealer of your life. And so I'm so great for you saying this guy's like, the more and more you learn about people that are very, very successful,

the more you're gonna begin to believe you can be because they're not much different than you. And that's one of the beautiful things about you brother. And you also listen to good stuff. So one of my favorite interviews you ever done was with Rolling Stone. And because they asked you what you listen to, what's on the playlist?

And you said, I like John Mayer, hip hop playlist, early 2000 stuff, Nelly Snoop Dogg. And I listened to the Ed Mylet show. And I'm like, hey, that was, yes, I get it rolling stone. But setting me aside for a second, what about reading, what about listening to good stuff? I mean, that's gotta be a part I know now,

more and more of you of just feeding your soul and your soul and your spirit, your mind on a regular basis. Yeah, I, so I'm just lexic and so reading. Yeah. So it's been learning has been a journey, has been a journey my whole life. As a kid, I got, it was really kind of a tough thing because I would be in taking a test and say the test, the class was an hour long for the test. You know, there'd be people that got done in 20 minutes, you know, the brain and the extra people

that just, it comes to them easier. And they'd turn their test. And then I would be like, at the end of the class, I'd still have half the test left. And so I could never figure it out. And then eventually I went year struggling through that. And I found out that I was dyslexic. And so I got a time, I was very fortunate

to where I got a time and a half on tests. You're searing after that. Yeah, which was amazing that I do that. Because if I didn't have that I would I mean I ended up having pretty good grades because I it's not like I couldn't learn it. It just took me longer to do that So most of the short I don't read I do audio books So I do a lot of audio books and I just read a book called breath that was really interesting By James Nester that was about breathing and I'm always trying to figure out some kind of techniques.

Some, and then podcasts, man. It's just that I think when I started going on hikes, I go on a hike every day. That's one of my big things. And it started to where I would go on a hike and I would listen to one of your whole podcast or, and then you'd bring on a guest. And I, and it was somebody

I'm really interested so then I'm then I've discovered that just like just like me singing a song with somebody else and then all of a sudden or somebody's opening for me or whatever it is and I discovered that person's artist because I go to the show or whatever and then I then I start listening to their music it's like you know people that you love usually surround them with themselves by people that make them greater. And then you find that group of people that you really believe and speak your soul. And that's what I do is I try to find somebody that just, I believe in their message. And that they're also just as willing to grow as I am and still realize even if they're at the top that they know that they have a lot further to go and that they don't have it all figured out.

I think that's my favorite thing is to realize the people that I idolize or use as mentors don't, they might have a lot of messages, but they're the first to admit that they don't really have it all figured out, but they have tools to help them get through, through their day. That's perfectly said. That's what I hope, I hope that I do is that I don't, there's exactly what you do. That's, that's why that's how I got into all that. That's really honestly. Thank you, man.

I mean, and I, I just think you're such a remarkable man. And I want to, I want to talk about music a little bit. I'm curious. I'm kind of a two-parter. Being dyslexic, does that affect the any way you're writing? Because you write, I'm wondering if there's any impact on that. And then, you're music. I just want to make a comment about it. Because you said something about affecting people. When I speak, my hope is that maybe they even forget a lot of things they say, but they remember how

they feel. And to me, your music, I'm actually, I actually get emotional listening to your music. I told you that the, the songs about you that I was emotional listening to it. And my car actually messaged you as I was listening to it. Yeah. And I played Sunday Drive this weekend for my wife for like the 400th time with the actual video, which is my favorite of all of your songs of tons that I love. And I cried again, like I cried, like I feel things in your music. So talk about if the dyslexia helps you, hurts you at all or affects your writing.

And then songs about you, like talk a little bit about the album and what people should expect from it. Yeah, I think this Lexia, whether it's Dixlexia or just my mind is very all over the place in a lot of ways. So some people like if I so I like my processes as a songwriter, I love to get I love to get kind of the foundation of the song ready to go. Like I might have the melody and I recorded in my phone, or I have a title to a song and I recorded my phone. I'll get the whole chorus written.

Like some songs will come to me in the middle of the night at 3 a.m. And I have to get up and jump up and record it. The idea or as you know, it escapes you if you don't get up. So I like to have the concept kind of together. And then I show up with some incredible collaborators, sometimes I run it by myself, but I love to work with people that are stronger in me in other areas.

And somebody that might play some different chords that I wouldn't normally go to on a song that lifts that idea, that concept that I have in my head, or somebody that can twist a little part of a lyric in a different spot. And so, but, you know, to the dyslexic part or just the way my mind works is, I'm all over the place in a ride

a lot of the times where, and I actually think it does help me, whether it's, you know, I think, because I'll jump around to a lot of different ideas in the middle of a ride, and I get people that just trust me to know that I don't want to waste their time either. I want to get an idea that we all get.

But if I'm like kind of into the idea of the song, and then I stop and I'm like, ah, but I had this other idea. I was just thinking about this morning. I was walking in the studio and I really want this. And we just totally, that song just goes away forever. But it wasn't the song that was speaking to me. And it's not speaking to me. And it's not speaking to me, and it's probably not gonna speak to him,

because I gotta tell the story at the end of the day. I gotta believe every word I'm saying, and I gotta live it. It's gotta speak to my soul. And if it doesn't, then nobody else is gonna believe me. And that only gets you so far. So the people that I've really found, I've found seeming incredible collaborators

that can listen to me kind of mumble and spit a bunch of words out and lyrics and melodies and help me pull it together. And that's how the song's gonna come together for me as people that just have that trust. And they really make me a better person and songwriter and everything just by being there with me along for the ride. That's all you can ever ask for as a collaboration creator is somebody that just wants to go down

that with you and they'll show up day in and day out. And we can all come successful from it, but you know, that all has to start with bright music. And what if someone didn't like it? So I find that impossible, but art is art is, there's an assessment made of art, right? Like, people's, you already sort of acknowledge, hey, man, like, I've got these anxieties, I've got these fears.

So be real, continue to be real, because I think you're helping so many people right now, bro. Like I, you're helping millions of people right now. This is going to be shared, this will be shared widely. How about criticism? How about that? And how is that the final frontier? It is for me. So if all the things I've had to work on in my life, you know, my mental preparation, my overcoming, my chaos and anxiety and sort of my

interversion and my melancholy nature and all these things that I still are right around me all the time. The final frontier for me is how I deal with criticism, because I'm so hard on myself, like you, that if I have not pleased to somebody, I'm not happy with my work, or I give you an example, I gave a speech yesterday, and the guy that introduced me said, this man gave the best keynote speech I've ever heard

in my life six months ago, that's why I've invited him in. It's a pretty big compliment, right? He goes, oh my God, yeah. Great compliment. And then when I'm done, I go, I said, how did I do? He goes, really good.

You know what, that's like, right? And I said, really good. I said, well, how did it compare to the one that was the greatest one you've ever met? He goes, he goes, well, I can tell you the differences. And I'm meeting like my heart sunk just a little bit. You know, like, it wasn't even, it was like, I was good, but it wasn't like the one that I mean it like my heart just a little bit you know like it wasn't even like I was good but it wasn't like the one that I heard you know and I'm like oh and since

he told me that which was last night about 615 I have replayed him telling me that now about 3000 what did I do what did I miss so I know that I'm that way but like how do you deal with criticism are have you got to that point where you deal better with that, or is that still a good, irritating thing? You're speaking to my soul brother, you are cut from the same thought as me, man.

I am the same way. I, when I'm sharing a song, for one, I have the people that I'm closest with, I'm the most scared to share my music with because I care most about them. So, you know, like, you know, it's anything that throws it off. I'm like, oh, it's not great or whatever. And so, I get really, I have to get the whole concept together in the song and deliver it. If I send a song with somebody and it's

in a text, you know, because now you just like text the file. If I don't hear anything back within like an hour, I'm like, oh my god, I'm playing these things in my head. So no, I feel bad. I took about two days to get back to you. Yeah, no, no, but and I know that now, but like if I know someone's around and that they probably get to listen to or whatever in my head, I'm like, oh, they don't like it. Or they might just say, that's good. Or that's, you know, and they might really mean it's good, but in your head, it's like, yeah, but they, or that's pretty good.

That said pretty good. Does that mean it's like, you know what I mean? And those little things. And so it is tough. I think what you have to do is you have to find, you can't go out there and search for a million different thoughts of criticism from other people. You find the people that you really care about that know you.

And I think the most importantly is that if you know it's good and if you really believe it and you really honestly to your core believe this is this comes from me and I've made a lot of music. I've done a lot of speeches. I've said a lot of things. I'm open to the idea that it's not perfect. But if I know it's good, I trust my gut in a lot of things. And it doesn't mean that other people's opinions don't matter on it. It's just my circles smaller on how many people I give it to before it goes out there, everybody else. But criticism and stuff, I have to really flush out the whole idea first with myself and get myself fully sold on it.

And if I'm trying to get myself to believe it, and I know there's a little, you know, a little bit of doubt in there that I know maybe I got some work to do. But I've tried to start to focus more on my intent. In other words, my intent was to serve. Your intent was to give them something beautiful. Your intent was to, you know, give them a gift in their life

and that I can only really intend to do well. I can only intend to do my best. Beyond that, by the way, that's where my confidence comes from too. Like, I know my intentions, my intentions. Yeah, this show or with you, I'm sure to improve people's lives. And at the end of the day, I think everybody listening to this, you know, focus more on your intent

than the opinion about what you're doing. Yes. You also, you also, anything you try to do, you're gonna be probably not very good at in the beginning and really good at it eventually. So like, yeah. Gonna improve. What about, here's a hard question.

I wanted to ask you this. I was thinking about it this morning. Things for me to ask you, that everyone gets to listen into. Yeah. Is it worth it? And was it what you thought it would be cracked up to be? For me, whatever it was,

like some notoriety or wealth or whatever, someone asked me, was it everything you thought it would be? Am I honest answer would be no. There are things about it that are better than I thought it would be. But there were elements about how I thought I'd feel about myself that just didn't happen once I got there because it was an internal game. I thought once I got to, you know, I don't know, certain amount of wealth or influence or whatever, that

I would feel differently about me or life. And I didn't. And I didn't. But there are other elements, the freedom, the choices, the, I don't know, access to things, whatever it might be. I did exceed my expectations, but overall, I would say, I don't know if it's better or worse, but it's certainly different than I thought it would be. What's the truth for you?

You've become one of the most famous artists in the world. It's something probably dreamed about as a young man and it's happened. Is it what it was cracked up to be? Yeah, I mean, I'm literally like nauseous right now just thinking about this. I'm about to get really vulnerable. Yeah. And this is like, this is the feeling I got before I knew to chase it and like, I start freaking out. But then I, you're saying that I know, but I double down, I double down to

it and go and run towards it, you know, but this for me is, it's really the truth of it is, is that there are days where it doesn't feel worth it and there are days when I get on stage, or I get in that moment where someone comes up to me and says, you know, I lost, you know, my father last year and this song was literally, got me out of bed in the morning and it got me to a place where I felt like I could get through this life and make something in my life. And when I started hearing those kind of things,

those are why it feels like it is worth it. There are the days where it's a grind and it's a fight and it's why am I here, what am I doing? I could just be a home living a normal life. And I mean, just staying home and sleep my own bed, not a tour bus and not in a, you know, some hotel room and up-sacrifice a lot of social and relationships and everything. And you really do question it

times. Even when you think you got to figure it out and you do love it, the reality is that there's you know, everything changes. And I think that through my career from the start to now, there was a moment in the middle where I almost quit. I almost said, this is, you know, it's not what I thought it was. I'm putting way too much pressure myself. I'm sleeping like two hours a night, you know, I'm spending so much pressure, I can't sleep. I'm tired mentally much pressure, I can't sleep. I'm tired

mentally all the time. I want to be great, but I just feel like I'm not there. I'm playing hundreds of shows a year and I'm just not giving any time to myself. And I don't, I don't, it feels like a business now. It doesn't feel like what I originally got into this for. Yeah. And I almost quit, and then I, that was when the part of the journey of saying, I got to be there for myself, because that's what it really is, is that I, this whole time, I've been, you know, trying to please every single person I can and every you know Trying to be there for every person that I can and and then I'm not there for myself and This is and then I got a dog I hear you

If you guys were watching not listen, I could just pull it up a seat Daddy right there good to see We're just talking about you, man. We were, but the moment that I, the moment that I kind of checked out and I found out that it's like, okay, if I start putting boundaries in my life and like, and start actually saying, okay, these are the things, this is the message that I wanna stand for, and this is what I wanna say, and this is who I wanna be, and that was when I got control of my life.

That was so huge for me. That was the thing that everyone said on the show right there. And it was so true, and I wrote a new song and my new album is called Get Out of My House. And it was about, it's, when you hear the song, it sounds like a relationship that just doesn't fit your life. It's like somebody that comes into your life

and kind of tries to change who you are and just make you not a better person, but kind of bring you down. And so when you hear to get out of my house in that form, it's like, oh, you're just saying, this isn't right. You're treating me bad and get out of my house. What I really wrote it about was the things that you give real estate in your mind for in your life. And, you know, whether it be a bully and somebody trying to push you around or just a worry or an

anxiety weighing in your head and you're like, and you're giving that all the power instead of the thing that you love the most, which is your heart and what you're passionate for what you do. And it's like, and so I started to say, I started to tell those things, get out of my house, like, you know, and not giving it that space. And that doesn't mean I still don't have things that weigh down me, but I start taking little increments

and just really working on that more and more of like listening and getting out in silence a little bit more and stepping away from it. So I can see what I really, what my intentions are, what my heart is, is this serving my heart and the other, you know, the people that I really care about, or is this just something that I feel like I'm having to do for, to fulfill, you know, something else that, and someone else, you know, said, you said two things there. I want to unpack one is the bully thing. You know, so many of you listening to this, Brett's one of them, I'm one of them. You're the bully. Yeah. You

do it to yourself, everybody. So often, you're so hard on yourselves. And what you said, prior to that, of you really can't serve other people if you're not caring for yourself. It's, you could for a very short one to have time and what you're gonna find out, what Brett's telling you is that you just depleted, you just become empty. If you don't care for yourself, you're really not the mother you could be.

If you're not the parent, you're not the leader in business, you're not the creative person you could be. And so it's true. And the other thing you talked about was heart. And I'll mess this up, but it meant something to me. So forgive me for messing up your lyric, but there's where the heart is, the lyric to that about being, to me, it's about being present. And I'll mess this up. So forgive me because it's your words. But show me where the heart is. Remember when you felt the summer, yeah, let me back to when I was a little boy, and I did feel the summer, and I was excited when it would come.

And there was a different feeling and that time of life. And then I grew up and then every day is the same. And there aren't reasons anymore. And there's not an anticipation or an enjoyment of the present moment. Remember how the rain fell down on your skin? Just think about that simple thing in life that feeling of rain hitting your skin and how beautiful it feels.

This is what it meant to me when I read these lyrics, right? Yeah. When you lose your sense of wonder, the firework going off in your head, because there was a time we weren't thinking, we were flying, we were alive, I want to feel alive. Yeah.

I just played that over and over and over again, and I think that so defines how I feel, yeah, life and how so many other people feel. So I just want to acknowledge, man, that's a profound lyric right there. Thank you. And that's truly how I feel. And I, that song kind of stemmed from when I almost quit.

And then I kind of went on that journey to make that Sunday drive record. And I was like, I gotta find those sparks again. You know, I gotta find, I gotta find that spark. Because if I don't find that spark again, and I just keep going on the path I'm going, I'll quit. You know, I will totally just give into a life that is, that I've, you know, I've always been a kind of a dreamer and I'm killing those dreams

by just paying attention to the wrong things. And so I was like, you know, it's a sense of belonging and it's not like you can just all a sudden think it's gonna be You're gonna fit but the more the more I started to pay attention to those little things So I love to sing Christmas music because that anticipation where you're just talking about was you know You used to look so much forward to your birthdays or Christmas or whatever and the anticipation and the magic and the wonder and Christmas or whatever and the anticipation and the magic and the wonder and for a month out of the year, a month and a half, I get to be that kid again and I get to bring that

joy to people and I get to feel that feeling. And it's like, that's why I love Christmas music and it reminds me that I can still find that magic. I can still find, I can still there, I'm still that kid. I still have that same heart. He hasn't gone anywhere. I've just buried him a little bit more and more and more into the years and I'm slowly, slowly digging him back out and bringing him back out into the light. And I'm really starting

to feel that light and that rain fall back to down on my skin again. And the days where it's not, at least know that it can pass and if I let it and I don't give it too much thought and too much weight. This is exactly why I do the show. That's why I do the show. Like that part about me and a kid, he's in all of us still, she's in all of us still.

And listen everybody, you know, when you were a kid, you did something really important. Naturally, you operated out of your imagination and your dreams, not your history and your memory. And at some point, you started to shift and you started to operate out of your history. And that pattern goes away.

Imagination and dreams are so, and dreams and imagination, but different imagining a new future, imagining what your life could be. It's free to do day dreaming is free. Yes. Imagination is free to do and so few of us give ourselves the regular gift you did it all day is a key. Oh yeah. And as you get older you stop the juice of life which is and you just exist you just do you do and eventually you eventually you're not gonna wanna do quitting, by the way, with breath's referencing, doesn't mean you just walk away.

Quitting means maybe you just don't give it your all. Quitting means you don't grow. Quitting means you don't evolve. Those are all forms of quitting. And so you gotta imagine, you gotta dream. You gotta care for yourself. So let's go back a little bit. This is one of these is like fly by, right?

Like I don't wanna, I knew would be good today, but I don't know that I knew we were gonna go this deep. And we've talked, you know, enough about music. I suppose we have one of the greatest artists of all time sitting here on the show and we're talking about things I think that are even more important. Obviously I want you to all go get songs about you. And you'll thank me.

I mean, I'm telling you, some of your influences are interesting. By the way, the Christmas thing, you were super excited about that Christmas stuff. Like it's what he's saying is like, he was so dang excited about this Christmas. Obviously, the Christmas gifts he sends to, which are super awesome. Super good gifts. But, but like influences on you are really unique because you're, I guess you're a country music singer, although country music has become so broad that to me, it's like, there is

a bluesy element to it now. There is a rock element to it. It's just to be great music for me, right? That absolutely. I know this is a cheesy question, but I just think it's fascinating for a dude in your genre. Who are some of your influences growing up? Because this is when you hear him sing, you'll get this. If you've heard Brett sing. But like your influences, there weren't that many country music people necessarily, right? Yeah. Oh, and it's so interesting. I grew up in this very small rural town, a Paris, Illinois, 8,898 people. I think back then, now there's like 8,000.

But there wasn't a lot of music venues around. There wasn't a lot places to go see music. It was whatever I could discover from my grandparents, from my parents, from my friends listening to. And so early on, it was the Eagles, and it was Arios Speedwagon, and it was a lot of great classic rock stuff. And then and then I got in my mom brought home a CD one day of it was like a it was

like a karaoke CD of a Bobby Daring song and Sinatra did it too. It's called Mac the Knife. And I think I've ever really told the story much, but like this, but it was like a karaoke CD. And I remember my grandfather's used to listen to Sinatra and being Crosby and and just these classic singers. And I'd ride around the car with them. I thought it was cool, but none of my friends were listening to that stuff. You know, they were listening to, you know, whatever was popular than Backstreet Boys

or Insick or whatever it was. Garth Brooks, you know, like I said. But I thought it was cool because my grandfather's side was cool. So I was like, all right, mom, I'll give it a shot. And I went and I sang that song. And I started winning every talent show with it because I made myself sound like this old soul. And then I kind of started to develop that old soul.

And I fell in love with Frank Sinatra and Ray Charles and these big vocals because I started to feel these big vocals come out of this, you know, yeah I was actually like a little kid when I first started now I'm 65 but when I first started I had this big voice And I could I could fill a room up, but I was scared as hell to sing in front of everybody So I'd stand in the other room and sing and sing through the walls basically. But uh, so that's that was where my influence is Sonata Ray Charles, uh, Ronnie Donne for Brooks and Donne's voice just blew me away because he kind of mixed that rule with the soul and kind of mess them together and made me love country music. So I kind of had a very wide variety and I think that's kind of giving me a unique place and my musical emphasis to create music that is my own.

But it also is from someone else, their gifts, like hopefully I could pass that gift on to someone else as well and inspire them to find their voice. He's so humble, but just so you know, I mean, most of your fans of breads, but if you're not, let me just tell you something. He's one of these people that immediately when he begins to sing, you pay attention.

You immediately go, you just do, you just go, even go to his Instagram, guys, and watch him do something acoustic on his Instagram. I'm serious. You'll just go, whoa, like, wow, right away, like, like, right away. It's just that his, his gift or his talent or the combination of things because there are different things. Talents you've worked on, gifts you're given. I kind of think bread combination of both. And it grabs you right away. It's like, oh my gosh, which is incredible because he has so much ability for somebody who just has this thing.

And it's just, it's just, I tell people all the time about him. It's just different. It's just synotra had it. Like, I mean, you go, that's the chairman of the board right there. Like, wow, right? Like, wow. And he just, he has that. And so, it's just the truth. So that putting your armor on in the morning was something that was really powerful for me. Okay, a couple last things. Someone's listening to this, they go, you know what? I do have a dream in my life. I do have a ton of anxiety. I am a bit lost. I don't have a lot of resources. It's not like you had family connections in the music business, Brad, or you, you know, born into some, you know, you made it because you worked your tail off and you're amazing. But I'm someone sitting here with a dream. I have a

chance, I run into Brad Eldridge at Starbucks, just randomly. And I say, hey, I heard you on Edmilaet Show, it changed my life. Thank you so much for being so vulnerable. One more thing, Brett, like, what would advice would you give me to just get going towards my dream? What would your advice be to someone who's just afraid? You know, I don't have every resource in the world. And by the way, I'm not completely ready either. I'm not totally ready.

What would you say? I'm not told. Yeah. Well, I would say I'll kind of go back to that first verse and where the heart is that we were talking about where it's like, remember when you felt the summer, remember when the rain fell down your skin? It was like, where'd you lose your sense of wonder? Like when you're trying to go for that thing, you have a sense of wonder. You don't know exactly how to do it, but it's like chase down the, chase down, that the reason that you're nervous about something means that, that it's probably important. Like, the reason that you're scared to go, you know, play that music for somebody is probably because it's important to you. And you want it so it's like, when I first moved to town,

I would go knock on every door in town, and I would bring a CD of like me singing demos and songs I recorded in a barn in Illinois. And my mom took the cover photo of the CD. And like, when I was like, I was so green, I didn't know. I had no idea that this is a really crooked kind of business in some ways and harsh and relentless. And I didn't care because I was just like, I'm going to make it, I'm going to make this happen. And it's like, you think you have to go the point where it's like, if you know you love it, there's going to be some, there's going to be a grind to it. And there's going to be, there's going to be a lot of heartbreak. There's going to be a lot of different parts

of it. But it's like, do you love this? Like somebody really asked me, should I be a, should I move to Nashville and do the thing? Is should I be a songwriter? Cause there's thousands of people moving here every week or whatever. Should I go do that? I said, well, is this literally your,

this is the path that you wanna go with and you have to put every sacrifice and every sacrifice in it? And I think when you asked me earlier and really made me think about it, it's like, is it worth it? And I think now on the other side of the spots where I felt like it wasn't, I do feel like it is. But you got to show up for yourself. And once you really grind it out, you'll start to get some little wins that stack up to

some big wins. If you really, if you really go for it, it's like those big wins will get you to a place that you that you might have always dreamt about. And once you're in it, stay in it. But also remember that kid that that knocked on those doors, you're that same kid that, you know, had a name to prove. And you're pretty damn great and be there for yourself and you'll get to the other side and look back and take man those years flew but what a beautiful ride spent.

Wow, brother. I have to tell you, we were waiting to do this. I'm so glad we did it now. Like in the, in the, in the, in the worth it part, I want to say something to you so that you hear this and I'll let everyone hear it. It is worth it. And I'm going to tell you why it's all worth it to chase your dream.

Because when you do get on the other side of it, there be things you thought were going to come with that it didn't, but the self discovery, the things you learn about yourself. I'm watching a man whom I love and admire very much discover so much more about himself that he would have never discovered. Had he not chased his dream, had he not gone through the hardships, had he not thought about quitting. And so it's not the things you probably think you're going to get. It's the it's these little variables of life. It's these little breakthroughs where you learn more about you. These emotions that Brett struggled with, he would have struggled with them

anyway in his life. But this career, this dream, this pushing through allowed him to have these discoveries and breakthroughs and awareness is about himself that he wouldn't have had, had he not done the hard things, the difficult things. And so all of you, yes, it's worth it. And you're watching an example of it, not because he sells millions of records, because he does, or he's the best in the world at what he does, but because of the man he's becoming on this journey. And in just this one conversation, he's helped a millions of people that he would have never otherwise helped had he not got to the other side of this dream and still pursued it.

And so today is it a personification, an example of why it's worth it to chase your dreams. And I'm immensely grateful you did this today, brother. Thank you so much. Thank you, brother. Thanks for all the gifts you give all of us, man. It's like, I, uh, I told you you've got me through a lot of tough stuff and just by you being willing to learn and asking great questions. And I think in life, that's one of the best things you do is ask great questions.

Be curious. And you'll learn a lot about others and you'll learn a lot about yourself through that. And I'm just trying to learn every day and be a little gentler to myself. It's a lot, it's really easy to pick yourself apart, but there's no matter how tough things get, you can find a lot of beautiful things in your life and a lot of beautiful things to be grateful for. And just going along for that ride and seeing it with optimism and finding resilience, like you said, I mean some of the best things you can learn in life is through going through the hell.

And I immediately thought when you were just talking about when I was opening up for Keith Irving back in the day, I was pacing around the parking lot, actually with my coach, like therapist, has like, I don't know if I can do this. I'm about to play in front of thousands of people and I don't just don't know how I'm going to get up there and do this and I feel weird and I was all nerves and I but yet I did and and and I didn't die from it. I made I made it through and I became stronger and I'm

so glad and and I'm so grateful just to have the conversation like this because I can now look back at that and feel grateful for those moments that I was too scared to do something and I did it anyways. And the growth from that is tremendous. And I think just showing up and being there for that is such a beautiful thing. So thank you for that, that insight and everything you do, my brother. Yeah, man, your face changed when you just said that. And we'll always say often that on the other you do, my brother. Yeah, man, your face changed when you just said that. And it will always stay often that on the other side of temporary fear, temporary pain, temporary anxiety on the other side of that, when you get through it, you get introduced

to your other self. Yes. And that's a different life. And multiple times in your life, you can get introduced to it another self. I'm really proud of this self you've become. Hey, brother, I appreciate that. Really? I really am.

And I'm so grateful we did this thing. Gosh, I am really overwhelmed with it because I enjoyed it so much. And you're a very unique man to be so successful and so vulnerable, so open, and just so, so growth oriented to wanna improve yourself and improve other people's lives. So thank you brother.

And I must say to everybody, you gotta go get songs about you. It's so good. It's a diverse record. It's got emotions in it, diverse sounds, diverse tempos. It's just so good. There's every single song's good.

And guys, you know me, man, I'll just tell you, hey, there's three or four good ones on there. Go get it, it's worth that. I'm telling you, every song on this album is great. And and I told him that so please go get it and then follow bread on his social media even though we're gonna limit his time on there we want to watch all of y'all so I watch you that just in my own window right there I got it and if he's in your town go see him play you'll be so grateful that you did that and then in in my case, share the show. This is not a treat. Please share this with people that you love and care about. This is one of those, my gosh.

Excuse everybody. Yeah, share it with everybody. And if you haven't done it yet, go get my book, The Power of One Morse, number one on Amazon. It'll change your life. And I wrote it for all of you. So everyone, God bless you and continue to max out your life. This is The End My Let's Show.

bless you and continue to max out your life. This is The Edmila Show. [♪ OUTRO MUSIC PLAYING [♪