THE ED MYLETT SHOW - Start Separating Yourself From the Old Version of You

Episode Date: July 27, 2024

Your dreams are MUCH CLOSER than you think they are!   The difference between winning and losing is so small it’s almost too scary to talk about! Believe it or not, you are only ONE decision away from completely CHANGING your LIFE!   You are ONE MEETING, ONE CLIENT, ONE CALL, ONE STEP, ONE MENTOR, ONE THOUGHT, ONE BREAKTHROUGH away from changing everything!  In today's powerful throwback mashup episode, I'm reminding you to KEEP GOING, and sharing my top strategies and actionable steps to separate yourself from the old version of you, break free from the constraints of your past and embrace the next version of yourself!   Here's what you'll gain:   - Learn how to identify and overcome the self-imposed limitations holding you back.   -Understand the importance of "Separation Seasons" and how to leverage them for exponential growth.   -Get actionable insights on how to rewrite your story and step into the new, powerful version of yourself.   -Gain strategies for enhancing your mental, emotional, and financial well-being by redefining your identity.   This episode is a blueprint for anyone looking to make a significant shift in their life. Whether you're a parent, teacher, entrepreneur, an athlete, or simply someone striving for personal excellence, this is your guide to breaking through barriers and achieving extraordinary results.   Join me on this journey of transformation! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Please drink responsibly. This is the Ed Mylet Show. Hey everyone, welcome to my weekend special. I hope you enjoy the show. Be sure to follow the Ed Mylet Show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. Right now is a time of year where you can really separate yourself. You can separate yourself from other people, your competition, but you can also separate yourself from where you are, from the standards you've set. You can separate yourself from your current position to a new position in your relationships, your money, your body, your business, depending on the area that matters most to you.

And so we're gonna talk about that. You know, it's difficult when you're competing, if you're an entrepreneur or you're an athlete, if somebody's ahead of you, it's difficult to catch them when they're at full speed. It just is, it's difficult. They're in front of you, they're running full speed and you're chasing them down. It's difficult to catch them when they're at full speed. It just is, it's difficult. They're in front of you, they're running full speed and you're chasing them down.

It's difficult to catch it those times. But where you do catch people is during what I call separation seasons. And these are the seasons where some people begin to flinch. They get weak, they take time off, they relax. They get casual about their routine. Maybe they're not as sure about their standards as they once were.

And when they do that, they flinch, bam, you blow their doors off because you keep pushing and separate yourself during that time. You can separate from all kinds of different things. And again, I wanna remind you, this isn't just about competing against other people. It's separating yourself from where you currently are,

which is what all of you wanna do. It's called growing. Growing is separating yourself from your current condition to the next level, whether that's mentally, emotionally, financially, as I've said. And so, but from an entrepreneur standpoint, from a business standpoint, from a family standpoint, nutrition, diet, we're entering the ultimate separation season, which is

this window of time in the holidays. It kind of started around Thanksgiving, but it really begins to accelerate about the second third week of December. When everybody starts taking time off, they start cooling it. They don't show up to work like they did if they're an entrepreneur. They're not really hustling. They start making all these excuses in their mind. Well, clients don't want to meet with me during the holidays, so I'm going to take a bunch of time off or everybody eats bad this time of year, so that's what I'm going to eat bad or everyone spends money during the holidays that they don't have. I'm gonna do the same thing and that's when they get weak, they flinch. And if you can get even more disciplined, more focused, you can begin to lap people that are in front of you.

You know, here I am nearly 50 years old and I could tell you I've worked hard all my career, all my life in different areas, but I really get excited during separation season. So I'm like, this is when they're at half speed. I'm at full speed. I can lap them. If I'm in front of people, I can lap them two or three or four times. And it's also where I've separated myself from the former me.

You know, we're coming down to the end of the year. There's just so many days left when you're hearing this at the end of the year. And it's a chance right now to lean in at the finish line in so many areas. But what do most people do? If it was full speed sprint all year, this is when they start to jog and slow down and you know, I should eat that extra piece

of cake. I should do this. And they get off their game. And so today's going to be about separating. I want the max out community, the max out universe, those of you that are listening to this, to take advantage of this, to get excited, to go, this is when I get them. This is when I get after it, right? Because in life, I've said many times, in life, we really will never exceed what we believe we're worth. We just never will. And so if you can begin to do things

you think other people aren't willing to do, or maybe do things the former you weren't willing to do, you begin to believe that the new you deserves things other people won't get, and the new you deserves to get things the former you didn't get either. And so this is why this season is so critical and I've stacked up maybe 30 straight separation season. There's other ones. There's summertime, right? There's times like that and we're gonna talk about some of that right now and so but

right now is the big one. You all know what I'm talking about, right? Everyone gets kind of casual, everyone slows down and one day turns into three days, turns into four days. You know Christmas is a holiday, it's not a Hall of Month. New Year's Eve is a holiday, not a Hall of Month or a Hall of Week but people keep taking these Hall of Weeks and Hall of Months this time of year and it's when you get them, it's when you get the former you, it's when this new version of you emerges and so take advantage of this season. It's the greatest of all seasons and I can tell you, it's one of the reasons why if I do have some good things going on in my life is I separated during this time. I separated from the old me and I separated from my competition. So let's talk a

little bit about what some of those things are. Number one, right now you know in business people are going to start slowing down. They're gonna start doing all their planning for 2021. Here's the truth, planning doesn't take that long. You can do planning in a pretty quick window of time, right? You need to get after it. You need to execute. There's 12 months in a year. There's 365 days in most years, right? But don't go start planning 21 days before the year on a plan you could have done on New Year's Day anyway. You know what I'm talking about. Let's not make any excuses to do that.

For you achievers, you want to separate this time of year, but there's a subtle thing that most people don't realize about themselves. If you're not a real competitive achiever type, maybe you're more of a belonger. I want you to hear me very closely because there's a lot of people that fit both descriptions. You like being on the team. You like being a part of a squad. You like being part of a family environment. You're kind of that person who loves to be a part of something, but maybe not lead something. You have a really hard time doing the work this time of year because unconsciously, subconsciously, listen to me, you don't want to separate. You don't want to pull away from the pack. You love these people that you're around. And so unconsciously and subconsciously, you start slowing down as to not pull away even though you know, these things could pull you away from

the pack, because you don't want to leave people. You like the people that you're around, you're kind of that person. So if you're that person, you go to evaluate that, is there some element of you subconsciously or unconsciously who purposely doesn't do the things you know you should be doing to separate because you don't want to separate from where you currently are and you don't separate from the group of people that you're around and this is something that most people don't process and so let's talk about some basic places you could separate number one let's talk about your fitness this is the time of year where people start missing

gym days don't they don't they but you right now are going to make a conscious decision. I don't miss my routine. In fact, I double up on my routine. I'm not going to miss workouts. I'm not going to miss my gym sessions. I'm not going to make any excuses about parties or, or, you know, stay home orders now, if you've got COVID or something like that, obviously you're going to be working out at your home or pushups or some nature like that, but

you're not going to use COVID as an excuse not to train or workout. If you can go to a gym, if you live where you can still go to a gym, you're not going to use holidays or parties as a reason not to do that. You're going to let other people miss those workouts. Other people, the former you would have missed this workout, the former of you would have made a COVID excuse, the separating you doesn't do that anymore and that's going to produce a better version of you. So that's one place you could separate. Nutrition this time of year. You're going to have all kinds of temptation around you, aren't you, about eating foods you probably normally wouldn't eat, but what do we do? We go, well, it's Christmas. Of course I'm going to have it. But what if you could not, I'm not saying don't eat the dessert, but could you separate? What if you decided I'm just going to do it a little bit different than

everybody else because I want to convince me I'm doing things other people aren't willing to do. I'm going to convince me I'm different from the former me and from the people potentially that I want to pass up. There's two types of people listen to this. One of these like I'd really like to change me and get better in the former me and then there's the other ones you're like I want to do that and I want to smoke some people in life and business too. I'm competitive both are okay but when it comes to eating let's just say when those desserts present themselves you know what I'm competitive. Both are okay. But when it comes to eating, let's just say when those desserts present themselves, you know what I'm talking about, right? What if you just ate half the dessert? Maybe you're not so crazy, you don't eat any desserts, you want to enjoy your life, the holidays,

or eat half the piece of pie. It's the same flavor after the first three bites. That's what I found out. It's the same cake on the fifth bite it was on the third bite, so I'll eat three. It's the same taste, right? If it's gonna be an unhealthy meal, it's gonna be you know turkey and stuffing and all that stuff around me if you do that or in some cold enchiladas or whatever it is you're doing tamales around Christmas time. You know the different foods that we eat in our cultures, the Italian folks with our lasagnas around the holidays, whatever your traditions are. It's not that you don't want to eat it, because you want to enjoy your life. What if you just ate half of it? Right? What if you were in

portion control? That's a way to separate yourself. So it's little things like that. It's when you're at the gym, it's the separation season of doing that one more rep that I talk about, the one more exercise. In fact, I have to share with you, I was at the gym today and my gym has moved outdoors here in California, at least fortunate that the one I go to in Orange County, at least they move their equipment outdoors, many gyms have just shut down. And at the end of my workout, I was doing abs I'd done today was a shoulder leg or shoulder ab day for me. And I'd done my shoulder workout and exactly what I'd prescribed, I did one more rep and one more in all of my different sets, because I believe in that mantra of one more doing one more separates me. Remember that one more, right? And so, but when I was doing my abs, I had picked three exercises I was going to do. And I'm

like, wait a minute, it's separation season. Everybody's just doing their normal ab workout. I'm going to do one more exercise on my abs for a fourth ab exercise separation. Does that improve my abs? Maybe, but it improves the way I look at myself. And when I left that gym today, I did, I did stuff the old me wouldn't do. And I did stuff most people working out there aren't willing to do. I deserve it 49 years old to have the body of my dreams. So I'm convincing myself through what I'm separating that I deserve those things. I'm not in competition with other 49 year olds, but I'm in competition with the 48 year old me. I want to be more fit. I want to feel stronger.

I want to feel more powerful, more flexible, right? More energized than I did. And so these little separator steps, you stack them up, especially in the season when everyone else isn't doing it. And it magnifies. So it's important not only to do separation season, because I'm challenging you to do that. It's important to give yourself credit and be intentional about it when you do it. You go, I did it. I did it. And you're stacking that in the bank of changing you. They're deposits you're making. But if you're not aware of the deposit, imagine you went to a bank. You made a thousand dollar deposit in the bank,

but you didn't get the deposit slip to prove that it was in there. You didn't do anything to validate the deposit, right? That could be concerning. Well, a lot of people do these separation things, but they don't get the deposit slip. They don't go, I did it. The deposit slip of life is acknowledging

and giving yourself credit for doing the things that serve you that the old you wouldn't do or other people wouldn't do. So it's not enough just to do it. You have to be intentional about giving yourself the deposit slip, the credit that's required. That's what begins to change our identity. That's what begins to change our subconscious and unconscious mind and eventually even our conscious thoughts. How about having some separation moments this year with your family? How do you separate your family? How about some separation moments? What could you do this holiday season that's a moment that you've never had before?

Think about how can I separate my family from every other holiday we've had? How can we separate from the average ordinary families? What could we do this year? You know, many of you have been DMing, saying, this is the first year ever I'm going to go down and I'm going to feed the homeless this year and I want to take my children there. What an amazing way to separate this holiday from all the other ones if you've never done that before. Maybe your separations you're going to go back to church, you haven't been to church in a long time, maybe you can't physically go so you're going to do it online. Maybe it's this holiday season you're going to

decide hey guys this is corny but we're going to take a walk or this may sound silly, but I know how we don't always eat together every night, but for the next week, we're going to have dinner together every night at the dinner table. These things may seem very simple, but I ask yourself right now, what could I do to have some sort of separation season during this holiday season for my family that makes it better and different in a very difficult time that may cost no money that I could do if I were innovative and creative that would make this the separation

of all holiday seasons for my family. I want you to begin to think about how you could separate that separation moments. I think if you begin to process this stuff of, I'm gonna separate in every area I can, I think you're gonna find something very special special happening Friday afternoons. The productivity level on all the studies for entrepreneurs and employees and even in school with students and teachers Friday afternoons, beginning at one o'clock till five o'clock or is the most unproductive window of the week. Why?

Because everybody's taking their plan to go cool it for the weekend. What if you decided I'm going to start pressing the pedal down Fridays between one and five? That's a separation window of time where before maybe you weren't after it. Now you are. You've changed your identity. This is how you become a new you in 2021. If you just do the same things, right, or you just think different thoughts, but behave exactly the same way. The chances of you separating yourself from where you currently are at the time you're listening to this podcast

or this YouTube video and watching it. And a year from now when we come back, if it's just thoughts, see, you have to have a congruency between the way you move your body, your actions and your thoughts. That validates them. That congruency changes you. But if you just

think something and act the same way, and don't separate from the former you separate from the former thought, then eventually the body overtakes the mind that your body is your unconscious mind, it's your subconscious mind, the thought is conscious, the body is your subconscious mind. So if you can begin to move your body in congruency with your thoughts, now you've created a new you in 2021, maybe a new company, maybe a new family,

maybe a new relationship, maybe a new body, maybe new finances, but the actions have to be in congruency with the thoughts, the body moving as you think. That's how we separate. And so I want you to begin to think about, well, Friday afternoons, I could separate. Another thing that happens,

most entrepreneurs slow down on weekends. Saturdays are huge separation seasons for entrepreneurs. Most entrepreneurs cool it on Saturdays. I'm not suggesting you have to work Saturdays, but if I were trying to find, because life's a game of inches, in the big time, it's not yards that separate the great ones. It's not yards that take people who are functioning at a high level, and they go a little bit higher. It's inches. It's a game of inches. In fact, these inches are so small,

it's almost too scary to talk about because it's that small of a thing when you start stacking up one more, but you separate. So what's another place ed in 2021 where I might separate Saturdays, Saturdays, Friday afternoons, right? These are places where you can separate. They slow down, they flinch, you blow their doors off. You know what I'm talking about? And as you're doing it, you're,

I'm doing stuff no one's willing to do. I'm gonna get things no one's gonna get. Or maybe the thought is, I'm doing stuff I've never done before. So I'm gonna be a whole new me and get a life I've never had before. This is how you change how you view you. By the way, there's a whole bunch of other ones too. There's the summertime.

There's evenings. A lot of people just assume once I'm home, well, what if you could carve out a half hour in the evening and disappear and do some emails that the average person doesn't do or disappear in the evening. You've had your family time or but you kind of carve it out or you do a second workout like in 75 hard in the evening because no one does second workouts but now you do. So there's these things where you can separate. It's abstaining from a particular behavior for a window of time that separates you. It's like you know what I'm not going to eat this way or I'm not going to drink this thing or smoke this thing I smoke. I'm going to put that down and separate from the former me. I'm not going to eat this way or I'm not going to drink this thing or smoke this thing I smoke I'm going to put that down and separate from the former me. I'm changing my behaviors.

If you're an athlete and you're that person who always stays the latest, right? Stay 15 minutes more. Stay another 15 minutes separate from the former you. All of these inches add up. Here's another way you can separate yourself. Just me seems small, you're at a social function. Hopefully we get back to doing that soon right, but when I have separated myself, you ever go to a social function, you sort of see the person who's left alone that nobody knows. It's very uncomfortable for me to walk up to a stranger, but what I've built the habit of is separating from the former me, is approaching somebody in a social

circle I can tell is the one who doesn't know everybody there and going over and welcoming them and introducing myself and getting to know them and asking them what their story is. Maybe the way you separate yourself is here's a huge one that you could do starting now and maybe all the way into 2021. You ready? Stand up for somebody when they're not there and another person is gossiping about them. Stand up for somebody when they're not there and another person is gossiping about them. You want to separate and feel great about yourself? You know exactly what I'm talking about. We all get into these conversations where there's a little gossip about another person. What if you started to separate from the former you? Separate from the average nori person and stand up for that person when they're not present to defend themselves

and say, hey, I don't know if any of that's true, but that's not something I want to be hearing about. Or you know what? I know so and so, and I don't believe that's true. I don't think they would do or say that. And I don't like that we're talking about this. It makes it uncomfortable. We're both better than this. And so what if you started to do these little things

could start to tell you, you know what? I'm different. I'm behaving differently. I'm a little bit better than I used to be. I'm separating from the former me. I'm separating from what average and ordinary people do. Average and ordinary people do all the things reverse of what I just said.

They cool it on Friday afternoons. They eat the full piece of cake. They slow down on their workouts. They don't get creative around the holidays. They gossip about other people, don't they? They don't create new thoughts. They don't do the extra rep at the gym. They don't stay disciplined to their diets, right? They don't put in a little extra effort in the

evening. They don't do anything on Saturdays. So all of these things are opportunities. I think what you're going to find if you really begin to think about separating from the former you and becoming the better you, almost nobody goes up to that person who's alone at the party. almost nobody goes up to that person who's alone at the party. You know what you're going to find out? This thing we call winning or bliss or self-worth, self-confidence, identity isn't as difficult as we think it is. It's little inches and when we're aware and we're intentional and we get creative and innovative about places we can separate ourselves.

I mean, it may sound really silly and stupid and we get creative and innovative about places we can separate ourselves. I mean, it may sound really silly and stupid because I'm an introverted person, but one of the ways I separate myself, this may sound really silly guys, I smile and say hello to strangers often because almost nobody does it. I would have never done it before. And just to give them the gift, you're gonna think I'm crazy. I walk by people sometimes, if I can't make eye contact, I literally say a prayer, peace be with them.

You think, why would you do that? Well, one, I wanna pray for them. And two, it's a way for me to feel better about me. I'm doing something, thousands of people walk by that person, didn't see them, didn't say hello, didn't smile. And even if I didn't do that, almost nobody say a quick prayer for a stranger, right? Separation season next level. Make a few extra phone calls and text messages this year that

almost no one's going to make. Instead of texting that friend that you talk to all the time, you know that's the normal behavior, separate, call them, let them hear your voice. Maybe that person you have not texted or talked to in a long time, send them that text, send it to multiple people, let them know you care about them. You know how you all get that text everyone sends, Merry Christmas, Happy New Year, that everybody gets? Separate yourself and make them voice notes this year where you personally say it to somebody. Takes a little bit more time, might be an extra couple hours, do it. You want another way to separate yourself? Do it before New Year's Eve and do it before Christmas Eve. I'm giving you a tip.

Everyone gets all their messages on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. How about you leave your voice notes or your text message two or three days early? Hey, I wanted to be the first or I wanted to get in there early before everybody's hearing about you. I wanted you to know I was thinking about you. When New Year's happens, how about doing on December 29th? Just say, hey, New Year's is coming, we're all going to get flooded with messages. I've already made my plans. I know you have. And reach out early. That's a separator. It makes you different. It makes you unique.

And it makes you begin to separate from the former you and you separate from your competition. If you want to move apart from where you are currently, it's what you're going to do now, right now and into next year. That's going to make the difference. Not what you say and not just what you think. Now does what I've done millions of hours with you guys on what you think and impact how you act. I understand all that.

But the end of the day, there's too many people just thinking they can think their way into changing their life. You can't think your way into doing it. You must physically do it. You must physically separate. And I'm gonna give you the mother of all great news about separation season. You ready? Millions of people are hearing this show right now or watching it. And less than 1% will do any of the things I've said. Is that incredible? Less than 1%. So by virtue of doing anything I've said today, any of the things, not all of them, and some of you will do all of them, but any of them, any one of them, you have separated yourself from about 99% of the people. But more importantly, if you do just one of them, you have separated yourself from about 99% of the

people. But more importantly, if you do just one of them, you've separated yourself from the former you into a growing better you. So I love separation season when they get weak, when they flinch, when they relax, when they kick back, when they take a haul a month or a haul a week, we take our holiday and even on our holiday, we find our little goofy crazy ways to separate ourselves. And you know what you could do really big time this holiday season, separate yourself by having more fun. See, none of the things I said can steal from fun. Don't have to take from your fun. What if you decided this can be the most

blissful, most fun holiday of all time. And you know what? It doesn't matter what the conditions are. It doesn't matter about a pandemic. Hey guys, I'm in the pandemic too. I've had some health issues too. I've had some family issues too. I've had my best friend and father pass away too. So I understand all that. Okay. I relate to a lot of the pain many of you are going through. I connect with that. I'm being vulnerable with you. And guess what? This is gonna be the most blissful separating season of my dad gum life, because I'm gonna honor these difficult times by coming out of this a better man, an improved man. And I don't do that by hoping it or thinking it, even though those things help,

I want to hope, I want to think, but I got to do and they're simple little things. These inches are the separators. The sad thing in life is people think they have to make these massive dramatic changes in order to create the catalyst for long-term change. Most massive chains are simple, fine tuning type, carburetor adjustments that we make that end up overhauling the engine of our life long term if we're willing to get creative and innovative. So I want all of your thoughts, your vision, your paradigm, the matrix you start to see the world through starting right this moment. How can I separate? How can I separate? Separation separation from competition, separation from the former me. How can I separate separations, separation from competition, separation from the former me, how can I separate my body, separate my mind, separate my family, separate my moments,

separate my nutrition, separate my business, separate my money. Everyone's spending extra money, I ain't doing that this year. I'm separating everyone over eats. I ain't doing that this year. Everybody cools their workouts. I ain't doing that this year. Right? All of these things begin to be catalyst for change and you stack up all these inches. And this time next year, right? All of these things begin to be catalyst for change. And you stack up all these inches. And this time next year, there's a different woman standing there. There's a different man standing there. It won't be perfect. There'll be things you need to do then to separate from that person. But I want you to remember this. Lastly, we're not separating

from where we are, because there's something wrong with us. That's not the reason. You're exactly the way you're supposed to be because that's exactly who you are right now. All you can do is start from where you are one day at a time, one more at a time and separate. And guess what? In a year, you'll be exactly the woman or man you're supposed to be at that time. And we'll be talking about separating from there as well. That's the journey of life. We're either growing or we're dying. And I want you to grow. And we grow by separating.

So today was brief, to the point, tactics, strategies. Share this with people. Get the message out to your teams. If you're in business, then it's time to separate as a team, as a company. Get it to your children, your family, the athletes you know. It's time to separate. If you listen to the show for a while, the athletes, you know, it's time to separate.

If you listen to the show for a while, you've heard me and my guests talk a lot about how critical it is to have your wellness goals in order, especially lately with me. So, you know how powerful visualization is when you visualize yourself one 10 30 years from now, you've achieved all your goals. Ask yourself this. Am I healthy at that point in your visions? Of course you are. But like anything else without a plan to get and remain healthy, you can't hit the goal. That's why I'm so thrilled to be partnering with Life Force.

It's co-founded by my good friend Tony Robbins and Peter Diamanis. Life Force is a leader in proactive care. The Life Force membership includes everything you need to understand your wellness and help you make good decisions today to keep you on track in the future for your health. Listeners on my show get $250 when they first sign up for their membership by going to mylifeforce.com slash ed. That's my lifeforce.com slash ed. Take control of your wellness with LifeForce and see what the healthiest version of you actually looks like and is capable of. These products and statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. These products are not intended to diagnose,

treat, cure or prevent any disease. Very short intermission here, folks. I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far. Don't forget to follow the show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. Today's question involves winning. And I've been asked, Ed, can you please give us

one of the invisible keys to winning that separates the winners from the losers in any endeavor? And so I'm gonna do that today. You know, there's a million keys to winning that separates the winners from the losers in any endeavor. And so I'm going to do that today. You know, there's a million keys to winning, but one of the things I want to take the mystery out of it for you. First thing is I'm always a little bit concerned. It's trepidatious for me to talk about winning and losing because I know how small the difference between winning and losing is.

It's almost too scary to talk about. It's really true. I've watched people get very close to winning and it's that one little thing they missed, that invisible thing that separates the winners from the losers. It truly is a game of inches and millimeters when it comes to winning in business, winning in sports, winning in life, winning in our body, winning in our emotions. It's the small things I found. And I think most people want to believe that there's all of these secrets to winning

Because as long as it's secretive and they don't do it then they've got an excuse as to why they haven't won But what if the truth is there really aren't any secrets? There just really aren't that we all sort of really know what we need to do to win But what it comes down to that little thing that separator that's too scary to talk about, is our willingness to do those things and the consistency with which we do them. Here's what I found. The people that are average and ordinary in most endeavors in life do the things they need to do occasionally and the people that win and dominate do them every day. They just do it more consistently. They do the things that the average do do them every day. They just do it more consistently

They do the things that the average do once in a while they do all the time and that's the separator It's not you can't do something when you feel like it You can't do things on the days that you feel great the separator isn't who's more motivated right motivations important inspirations important But the truth is it's what do you do on the days that you are not motivated, that you are not inspired? Do you have the habits and rituals and disciplines, the guts, the grit, frankly, to step up and do the things that you know you need to do all the time, not some of the time? And when you stack up those all the times, those are the inches that you fight for that separate the greats from the average, the ones that become the best ever, the goats in their

industry, the best moms, the best dads, the multi-millionaire entrepreneur compared to the ones that just do okay. It's interesting, you know, there's a rhythm and a pace to success that I think most people aren't familiar with. I can promise you right now that if you spend a day with some of the top entrepreneurs in the world, there's a rhythm and a pace that you probably aren't used to. It's faster. It's quicker. They talk faster.

They walk faster. They think faster. They make decisions faster. And it's just a hair. Like if you watch an average ordinary entrepreneur, they look like they're working hard. They look like they do things most days, but it's a little slower. The cadence, the rhythm isn't quite what it is for those that dominate. I could tell you there's a rhythm to success and once you understand that rhythm, which

I'm trying to explain to you, it's 15% faster. It's 20% faster. It's not a hundred times. They don't do a million things better. They do a few things better and they do a few things better, and they do those things consistently, and they do them faster and more repetitiously. You know, really, the best ability in life is availability. The best ability is availability.

It's showing up and doing things consistently on a regular basis that most people just can't have the discipline to do. They get what I call leadership fatigue or they get routine fatigue. They just get tired of saying the same things over and over again, of doing the same things over and over again. And that's what discipline is. Discipline is the ability to do things when you don't feel like it. And when you're tired of doing it, when you're fatigued, when you're bored with doing it. Most winning is not beautiful. It's a grind.

And remember this, when you're making history, it very rarely feels like it. It rarely feels like it. What it feels like is work. What it feels like is lonely. What it feels like is you're the only one doing it. And that's because you probably are. But what you need to know is that when you're laying those bricks every day and the person that you're competing against is laying them every third day, eventually, even if they're better at laying the bricks, even if they have some magic brick, which there's no such thing,

eventually, it's the person who can do it over and over and over again that separates themselves. And the truth is why don't people do things consistently? Because it's not sexy. It's not exciting, right? You think about the best, if you had a great mom, right? What does she do? She just shows up quietly every day and does the things that make a difference that aren't

beautiful but they matter. If you have a mom like I had, she was there every morning. She made my lunch every day on the days when she was sick and the days when she didn't feel like it. She picked me up every day from school. I never needed to wonder whether mom was gonna show up to pick me up from school.

You all know what I mean, right? Can you imagine if you were raised not knowing whether or not your parent was gonna imagine if you were raised not knowing whether or your parent was going to get you from school, not knowing whether you're going to have lunch every day? And I know a lot of you had to grow up that way. But the truth is, like my mom just did the quiet things that great people do every single day. She did her homework with me every single day. And I did well in school because of that. Whereas some parents did it only when grades were bad. Only when they had to. Only when there was a problem. Only when they felt like it. Only when their schedule permitted it.

So my mom was a great mom and some moms are average moms. Right? That's what separates you is doing those small things every single day. You know, it's like getting up earlier. In my first book I talk about, you know, successful people get up earlier. They just like getting up earlier. In my first book, I talk about, you know, successful people get up earlier. They just simply get up earlier. But how do you get up early? You say, Ed, I get up at seven o'clock. I'd really like to get up at 5.30.

Well, you don't all of a sudden start getting up at 5.30. If you got up an hour and a half earlier, this is what most people try. They try to change everything all at once, right? Let me tell you what's gonna happen. By about noon, you're gonna be tired and you're not gonna be your best The way you get up earlier every day is the way you change everything in life incrementally

So right now if you get up at 7 and you want to eventually get up at 530 Do you know what you do? You get up 15 minutes earlier. You won't miss those 15 minutes of sleep Now you're up at 645 and you do that for a month for a month. You get up 15 minutes earlier You won't even feel the change It doesn't even seem like a big deal. It's a drop in the bucket, right? It's 15 more minutes But then the next month you get up 15 minutes earlier. Now you're up at 630 You're up at 630 and you do that for a month. You won't miss those 15 minutes from 645 It doesn't even feel like you've changed anything

But consistently now you're up 15 minutes earlier. And then the next month you get up at 6.15. And all of a sudden you went from 7 to 6.45 to 6.30. Now it's 6.15. And before you know it, a month after that it's 6 a.m. You can reverse engineer it all the way back. Several months later you're waking up at 5.30. But you do it incrementally and it

doesn't seem like a big change but it's huge because it's consistent. Same thing in business if you want to start doing it it's it's not making a hundred times more contacts every day it's increasing your productivity by 15 to 20 percent and doing it every single day. It's not massive changes most of you if you're an engine don't need a major engine overhaul You need a small fine tuning type adjustment the old days a carburetor type adjustment That's the difference. It's these small things. It's doing it consistently and it's this belief system Listen to me that you're gonna become relentless and obsessed with what you're doing

You know what the great ones do? They do the needle moving things. The things that move the needle. They don't just do the routine every day. They do something in their life as a parent, as an entrepreneur, as a leader that moves the needle. Stuff that can make quantum leaps. The hard stuff.

The difficult stuff. I teach in my scheduling that I don't do first things first every day. I do feared things first, feared things first. Get the thing you're most afraid of out of the way. You know how you do something consistently? You build the habit of doing the feared things first in your day.

If early in your day, if you've got a call you don't wanna make, do that call first. If you've got a call you don't want to make Do that call first if you've got a meeting you don't want schedule it first I try to schedule all my difficult meetings on Mondays early in the day too because I want to create momentum if I can do that one I don't want to do if I can make That call I don't want to make the rest of my day is like downhill It's like momentum going down the hill as opposed to if you've got that hard meeting or that one call or that contact you need to make And you just haven't made it all day and you make the other ones

You know, you're climbing uphill all day till you got to do that one But if you just knock the feared things first off, then it's like cruising downhill all day It's much easier when you create momentum. These are the things it's the pace. It's the rhythm. It's the consistency. It's the availability It's the game of inches that separate people. It's doing the things every day that the average do some days It's doing it on the days You don't feel like it compared to those who just do it when they're pumped up and excited and they've heard the right podcast Or they get the right Instagram message today these are the separators and when it comes down to, truthfully, is

this belief system. And here's what I've always said and I mean this I think you got to evaluate this truly. If you believe you're far away from something you will pace yourself that way. I've always heard people say well business is a marathon life's a marathon life is really long life can be short if it's miserable I can tell you that life can be short if it's not going very well and although it's a marathon the great ones sprint the whole race that's not that they don't rest I don't know you know what I mean what I'm saying is there's a pace. If you think something's far away, you act like it. See, most people don't lack vision.

They have a vision. If you ask them, hey, do you wanna be rich or poor? The average person would probably say rich. Do you wanna make a big difference in the world or make none? I'd like to make a difference. You wanna contribute or not contribute? I wanna contribute.

Do you wanna laugh or cry more? I wanna laugh more. I wanna be happy or sad, I want to be happy. You want to go see things and create memories in your life or basically do the same thing over and over again. Most people say, I want memories in my life. So it's not that you don't have a vision, it's that you have a depth perception problem.

You have a pacing problem. See, you think your dreams, those feelings, those memories, that change, that body, that relationship, that amount of money is really far away. And because you believe it's that far away, you've created patterns, belief systems, thought processes in your life that perpetually keep it that far away. You are jogging in the marathon of life where the winners are running 15 to 20% faster than you. They're up 15 minutes before you. They're making 15 to 20% more contacts.

They're doing every day what you do some days because they believe that they're one decision, one meeting, one new contact, one new relationship, one new thought, maybe one podcast away from completely changing their life. I'm not suggesting to you that it's going to be easy and that's going to happen like that. What I am suggesting to you is that if you think it's really far away and you pace yourself and you do things occasionally, it'll always stay that far away. It'll always be there. It'll always be a mystery. And here's the truth, you and I

both know it. There's no mystery to what makes a great mom or a great dad. You know exactly what it is. There's no mystery of what makes a great athlete. You know exactly what that looks like. There's no mystery would make a great entrepreneur. There's no mystery that would make you happier. There's no mystery. The mystery is you. The mystery is are you willing to do the things every day to be relentless, to be obsessed, to get out of balance? This notion of balance is a fallacy. If you're gonna do anything great in your life, some things are gonna be popping at a given time when others aren't

But what if this entire notion that your life is a finite kind of pie? That if you take a big slice out of the business pie your family's gonna suffer if you really focus on your family Then you're gonna suffer in your fitness what if the truth is that you're an expanding being that vibrates at a very high frequency and that when you magnify one area of your life if you do it correctly, it'll magnify and expand the others, not take from it. See, all these questions about what

it takes to win or am I going to be out of balance are from a completely flawed belief system. Two beliefs. One is that it's further away than it really is. And two is that if I'm killing it in one area of my life, another area has to suffer. What if that's one of the great lies of life? What if one of the great lies of life is that your dreams are for other people? That it's for people not like you? That they're doing extraordinary things that you're incapable of doing as opposed to the truth is they're just doing things every day that you only do occasionally. They have availability all the time. What if the truth is that the great lie is that it's far away and the truth is that it's one decision, one new thought, one meeting, one connection away.

What if that's the great lie of life? What if the great lie of life is that this is for other people and not you? Because I can tell you that that's the great lie of life? What if the great lie of life is that this is for other people and not you? Because I can tell you that that's a lie The truth is is that it's very close and the truth is is that it's these small Decisions that alter our lives. I could tell you straight up You're a lot closer than you think you are and what if the third great lie is that oh if I'm really expanding one area My life another area has to suffer that I'll become out of balance. I don't even know what balance means, but what I've found in my life, and here's the

truth, that's a lie. It's a flawed belief system that's been mind-virus throughout our culture and our society for years where we have these concepts of balance. Let me tell you what I've found. That when I am killing it in the gym, and I'm a business athlete and I'm strong and I'm spending time in there training my body, that I'm a better businessman. That's what I found. That my gym life, my fitness life, expands my business life. You know what I've also found? That when I'm killing it at work and I'm giving it everything I've got, that when I come

home I'm a better dad. I'm a better friend. I've got more insights, more energy to give to other people. When I'm suffering at work, I usually suffer at home. When I'm suffering in the gym, I'm suffering at work. So when one area expands, it magnifies the other areas of life. The reason that we believe it takes from one another and then we feed that belief system is we've been programmed into our minds to believe it. I'm not saying that you not need to be careful, that you don't need to be careful about your

allocation of time and making sure everybody gets something. But I can tell you straight up, the fitter I've gotten and the harder I've worked out in the gym and the more time I put in there, the better businessman that I've been. The better businessman I've been when I'm making a difference in my work and I'm growing and expanding, the more I bring to my family and friends, the more value I have, the more insights I have, the more love I have, the bigger and better version of me I have to share with my family. You remember this, if you're doing a great job as a mother or a father, you're going to bring that love and that comfort and that security and that

faith into your work life and it's going to expand your work life, not take from it. And when you're crushing it at work, you're going to be a better mom and a better dad and a better friend because you're a better you and you're more proud of you and you respect you more. And because when you come from that place, you've got more to give other people. And when you're nailing it in your fitness and you're crushing it and you're fitter and stronger those aren't hours you're taking from other places those are investments you're making in your strength and your vitality and

your mental well-being so that you are better at work and that you are better in your family one of those areas expands the others as long as you believe it does. Those are the three lies of life and today I cleared it up for you. I told you the truth. And so although there are no secrets to winning, there are lies, there are flawed belief systems that take from winning. And what I have found is that if you do the things that I've described today, you put yourself in a position to win where the probability of you winning is increased There's no guarantees in life. There's no promises

What we're trying to do is increase the probability and the possibility of our winning and what starts to happen is you become an? impossibility thinker into a possibility achiever All your life You've had this secret notion about you deep in your heart You were known you were born to do something great with your life when you were a little boy or a little girl You just knew it. Maybe even had a family member who made you feel that way. They saw the special in you didn't they? I'm here to just remind you today They were right.

You were right. You were born to do something great with your life. And I mean, yes you sister, yes you my brother. Maybe no one's told you in a while. Maybe no one's reminded you in a while. But I want you to know God made you to do something great. He made you in His image and likeness with a big plan. And you're going to make a difference in people's lives in what seem to be small ways that end up being huge ways down the line in their life. And some of the things when you're doing it's going to feel really big when you're doing it.

But remember what I said earlier, when you're making history in your life, most of the time it doesn't feel like it because you're in the midst of the work. You're in the midst of the fog. You're on that lonely road to success that I've described in other podcasts. If you've not heard those shows, listen to them. It seems lonely. It seems dark. It doesn't seem like you're getting there. But meanwhile, you're making deposits in the bank account of success every single day. The truth is the people that win, that become the goats, that are the great ones, they've just made more deposits in the success account than those that haven't. And they make those deposits because they do needle moving things, they get up a little bit earlier, they do it more consistently, they believe they're closer than they are, they know that

when they're crushing into one area they're expanding in others, they know it's a game of inches, they know it's almost too scary to talk about but the thing they really know is that they were born to do it That they were born to do something great with their life. So I'm here to remind you it's closer than you think You're closer than you think there are no secrets, but there are secrets. There are lies There are flawed belief systems and hopefully today we've rid you of a few of them. I really believe in you. And I don't believe in you because I've met you, because millions of you I haven't met. I believe in you because I believe in God.

I believe it doesn't make any mistakes. And even if you don't believe in God, that's okay. I got enough belief for both of us. And I know that you were born to do something awesome, that you're not here by mistake. I know there's a purpose to you in your life. And I know the more that you do these things I've described, that purpose will be revealed to you even if it's not clear to you now. Over time it'll be revealed. Over time those deposits you're making, millions of other people in your life and maybe just a few of them, will be the benefactors

of making the withdrawals because you did all of the work. The people that you love will thank you someday for doing all of the work you've done. Just right now they can't see it. Right now maybe they don't even believe it for you. But I believe it. And I know you're going to do something great. I hope today helped you. Hope every week when we come back on these solo episodes that you go, I picked up another

thing. I'm more inspired. I learned something. This is something I'm going to shift. I know for me it was valuable today. I feel like I was talking to me. I feel like I was talking to me. We're all in this together.

We're all brothers and sisters. None of us are better than anybody else. You know, the world is going to try to convince you that we're all separated, that we are all at each other's throats right now. We're all in this together and although we may have different opinions and belief systems about different things, we're brothers and sisters nonetheless and we were put here and born to make each other's lives better and that includes you. You are uniquely qualified to change other people's lives. You're the only person on earth right now with your experiences, your personality, your background,

your heart, your mind, all combined into one human being. Man, that's pretty special. Man, you're special. Wherever you're going, you better believe American Express will be right there with you. Heading for adventure? We'll help you breeze through security. Meeting friends a world away? You can use your travel credit. Squeezing every drop out of the last day? How about a 4pm late checkout? Just need a nice place to settle in? Enjoy your room upgrade. Wherever you go, we'll go together. That's the powerful backing of American Express. Visit amex.ca

slash ymx. Benefits vary by card. Terms apply. That was a great conversation. Be sure to follow the Ed Mylett show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. You know, people ask me often, what were some of the decisions and choices and areas I focused on that made the biggest difference for me in my life? And today's topic is the thing that I would probably give you the gift of first, and that is the power of your identity. See, I believe the most powerful force in the world is to be consistent with the thoughts,

ideas, concepts, and beliefs you hold to be true about yourself. And that is what identity is. Identity is the governor on every single area of your life. It literally sets the temperature for all of the conditions of your life. Shakespeare has this incredible quote that says, we know what we are, but not what we may be. And the who you may be is going to be dictated by your ability to alter your identity. Because you are going to always be consistent with what you believe you're worth and what

you believe you deserve or what is your identity. Your identity, the best analogy I could give you, is like a thermostat sitting on the wall of your life. It sets the entire temperature for the conditions of your life in multiple areas. And so most people think their life is dictated by external circumstances. They spend their entire life trying to control what is outside of them. You've all heard the great saying that people in 12-step programs talk about, about learning to control the things they can and letting go of the things that they can't control.

And the fact of the matter is you cannot always control the external factors that are impacting you in your life. The good news is it's the external things in your life that do not dictate the direction or the ultimate destination of your life. That is a fallacy. Listen to me when I tell you this. External circumstances do not dictate the ultimate destination of your life. It's an internal game.

You and your faith, your God, are what will control the direction of your life, not the external things that are impacting you all the time. And this identity is that internal thermostat. It sets the temperature just like a thermostat sitting on the wall of the conditions of your entire life. Let me give an example of how the thermostat of our lives works. The best analogy I can give you is exactly how one works in the room I'm sitting in. It sets the temperature of the room. And so the external conditions don't impact the internal temperature of this room because that thermostat regulates the condition of the room.

So if we open the door and the windows in this room and cold air blew in here, the thermostat would kick on, wouldn't it, and heat the room back up to 75 degrees. So no matter what hit it, it regulates the temperature of the room. The reverse is also true. If a bunch of hot air blew in the room, if we open the doors and the windows, the thermostat would cool the room back down and regulate it to 75 degrees.

Guess what? That's exactly how your life works. Once you accept this truth, it is a fact that is not the external things that are happening. It's the internal thermostat. Too often in life, people don't work on changing their identity, they're always working on producing external results. Have you ever known somebody who was wealthy and no longer is?

Have you ever known somebody who made a bunch of money and no longer does? How about somebody who was in a great relationship and that relationship no longer exists? How about someone who got in great shape that is no longer in that shape again? If your results begin to exceed your internal thermostat, you will find a way to cool your life back down to what you believe you're worth and you're comfortable at your identity. You'll think it's coincidental. Oh, I was, this accident happened or this appointment canceled or this circumstance took place. It's not coincidence. All of those things have happened because you set the thermostat of your life

and you've regulated what you're going to get. Isn't that incredible? That you can learn all the talents, the behaviors, the skills, the tactics, all the strategies that I teach you. But if you don't alter that thermostat internally, you could have all of the skills of a 100 degree producer, and you will live a 75 degree existence because you will turn the air condition of your life on back down to cool it where you're comfortable.

It's also true by the way, you've seen this in your own life. Maybe you've had something really good going in business before, you've got momentum, it seems like things are happening great and then you wake up four, five, six months later and you've cooled your life, your business right back down to where it was before. Maybe you'd save some money at one time, and then coincidentally your car broke down, or a bill happened, or there was a run of birthday parties, and all of a sudden that bank account's back to where it always was.

It's not coincidental. You've cooled the conditions back down again. And so you've seen this happen. Maybe you got in great shape at one point, but your identity wasn't that fit a person, and you've cooled it back down to about what you're comfortable being. This is true in your faith and your relationships. By the way

you have multiple thermostat settings. You have one in your faith, you have one in your fitness, one in your money, one in your happiness, right? One in your business life. So there's multiple identities we have. The reverse is also true. There's been times in your life where the circumstances, the conditions were terrible. You thought you'd never get out of it, you're never gonna eat again. Well guess what? You ate again, didn't you? And you in your life where the circumstances, the conditions were terrible. You thought you'd never get out of it. You're never going to eat again. Well guess what? You ate again, didn't you?

And you heated your life back up to that same place again. So you've proven this over and over in your life, haven't you? So have I, so has every single human being. The governor on our life, the regulator of our life is our identity, which is the internal thermostat that sets the temperature for our life. So the key in life is to learn all the thoughts, the skills, the tactics, and the strategies that can heat our life up in the areas that matter most to us. But if we don't simultaneously change the conditions of our thermostat, change what we're comfortable living at, change your identity, our worth, change the thoughts, beliefs,

concepts, and value we hold to ourselves, we will cool or heat our life back to that regulated temperature. And so I'm telling you the overall key to changing the external conditions of your life is changing that internal thermostat setting. So that's what we're going to talk about some strategies on today. Just being aware that you need to alter the thermostat is a life-changing liberating condition. I cover this in very specific detail in hashtag max out your life my book. It's a quick read hundred pages. I wrote it so that every page has strategies on it, no fluff. If you want

the book go to maxoutbook.com. If you put in the code max out I'll buy the book for you. So I cover this in detail there but I want to cover it in detail right now with you as well What you need to be doing is becoming aware of how important it is that you adjust this thermostat setting as You produce better results as you start to learn new skills and strategies and tactics See you can move from an average business into an extraordinary business with incredible opportunity But you will produce the same results you're getting in the average business if you don't change that thermostat setting up to 95 or 100 or 120 degrees of what you believe you're worth, the thoughts concepts and beliefs you hold true to be about yourself.

So it is the regulator on our lives and it's the main thing I work on with my private coaching with some of the elite performers I work with in business and athletics and with my private coaching, with some of the elite performers I work with in business, in athletics, in entertainment, in politics, is me working with them on changing that internal thermostat where we can heat it higher and higher and higher so that they can produce the results and the conditions of their life, stay and exceed those levels all the time. In fact, in my own life, I'm always working on my self-confidence. I'm working on my tactics and strategies, my ability to influence, right? My thoughts, all of those different things. But the thing I'm most obsessed about

that I know is gonna get me to the ultimate version of me is constantly elevating the temperature in the areas that matter to me, adjusting that thermostat setting higher and higher and higher and higher so that I can get those conditions to match it, because it always will. You will always get your thermostat setting, always in your life. So can I give you any insights as to how to change that thermostat setting? I can. Let me give you a couple.

The most powerful way and the easiest way to change your thermostat setting is by adding people to your circle very close proximity that live at a higher temperature in that area than you do. For example, in your faith, let's just say, you're a 75-degree or in your faith, you've already seen this, you can't possibly begin to regularly associate with good, godly people who pray regularly, who try to live righteously, and they're at 110, 120 degrees of faith in their life, and not have that proximity heat you up. No, you won't get to where they are, you'll get to somewhere between where you are at

75 degrees and they are at 110, over time you become a 100 degree-er and you alter the thermostat setting through association. Same in business. If you and I were to hang around each other every single day, and let's say you were a 75 degree-er in business, hypothetically, and I don't know that about you, but let's just say you were, and I was a 150 degree-er, and we hung around each other all the time. Don't you think through that association right especially if you had two or three or four people like me in your life that just over time you don't even feel it you're at 80, you're at 85, you're at 90, you're at 95 and that's where you are. We understand the power of this

with our children because we know at school the teachers have influence over them, they're mentors but the people that really have influence over our children are their friends because they're around them all the time. And so we know it sets their temperature. This is true in fitness. If you're a 75 degree of fitness at every meal, every day at the gym, all your associations, hypothetically speaking, were with someone who was shredded and fit the way you wanted to look at 150 degrees, you know over time you get heated up. And so you can't be with someone who was shredded and fit the way you wanted to look at 150 degrees, you know over time you get heated up. And so you can't be with someone every day, you can't be with them all the time, but the key is to get more proximity in the areas that matter with people whose thermostat setting

is higher than yours. I am a product. You are listening to me right now because I've been so obsessed with this concept of adding new associations to my life that live in the areas that I want to improve in at higher temperatures than me. It's my obsession to this day. I'll give you a secret. One of the reasons I even do my show is I know that I'm influencing many of these guests

in the areas that matter most to them through our proximity, and in some cases they do it for me. And so I'm obsessed with the power of association but I don't just associate see all personal says yeah you're the five people you hang around kinda you really are the five to ten people you hang around if you're conscious all the time of studying them of observing them of asking questions of the fact that you should be altering your thermostat setting that's when it really moves. It's not just hanging around.

It's consciously and intentionally spending time with people where you allow it to impact you, where you study them, where you really observe them, where you're open to their influence. There has to be a level of trust before you can do that,

where you surrender yourself to them. But it's not just being around them. It's intentionally being around people that alters that thermostat setting. So power of association is the main way to do it. Second way to alter your identity is in a short window of time, behave completely differently. In a 30-day window of time in your fitness life, you shock your system into eating or training completely differently than you used to. Or in your business life, you make 100 times more phone

calls, 100 more contacts. You do something in a very short window of time that shocks you into believing, my gosh, I could never go back where I was before. You trick your brain into believing you're different. There's this part of our brain that always wants to be consistent with what we're worth. Well, if in a short window of time

I begin to behave completely differently, your brain begins to believe you deserve something differently. When you begin to do the things nobody else is willing to do, you begin to believe you deserve the results nobody else deserves to get. This is important also because it changes the water line. It's almost like a water line in the pool. If you raise it, it leaves a new mark. Have you ever seen that before in a lake or a pool? You raise the water line in a short window of time and it just changes the mark in your life? It changes the thermostat setting.

So you can alter things in your life in short bursts and I do this often in an area where I really need to change. Like right now I just started back on a really seriously deeply committed fitness journey. I want to get back and past where I've ever been in fitness in my life. So I'm going to add some of these new associations. I'm gonna train with a new group of people because I've been training alone. I'm going back to training with some people that are fitter than me, men and women that are fitter than me. That's my first combination that'll alter my thermostat setting, our

proximity. And secondly, I'm going psycho the next 30 days. I'm going psycho. I'm altering my nutrition and my diet dramatically, my workouts dramatically, and I'm gonna shock my system in the next 30 days into changing the waterline, changing that temperature setting. That's the second way you alter identity, alter the thermostat setting, so that you alter the external results. I've said this to you before as well, see beliefs are so important to guard because once you have a belief your brain goes to work, I've said this in another audio video where your brain

has to go to work to prove your beliefs to be true. Your brain literally goes to work on finding the evidence to prove you right and so that identity you're constantly reinforcing it. Let me give you an example of what I mean. If you believe a certain worth about yourself, a certain identity, that impacts the type of action you're willing to take. So if there's a goal you've got set, it doesn't matter what it is, pick a goal. To the extent that you believe it's consistent with your identity is to the extent that you will make an effort towards it. It's a self-fulfilling prophecy however, because what happens is if your identity is here and the goal is there,

you will only make an effort congruent with what you believe you're worth and so that limited effort you make produces the result not consistent and it reinforces the belief. It's like a self-fulfilling prophecy. So you set a goal that is inconsistent with an identity you're working on. You will only make an effort consistent with the identity which will get you to hear, doesn't produce the result, and it reinforces this belief you have about yourself. So it's important as you set new goals, as you set new visions, that you also upgrade

your identity simultaneously. You're in process of upgrading it because that identity impacts the effort you make, right? Impacts the will you put towards it, and that will is reinforced by the lack of result, and so it becomes this self-fulfilling prophecy. So your mind has this belief it wants to prove to be true, and it starts to find references. So if you believe you're 75 degrees, it's going to start finding legs to put under that table to make it immobile so it can't move to prove you right. And so our identity equals our

effort and the challenge is that effort produces the result and so this identity has everything to do with the effort you make which produces the result which will reinforce the identity or the lack thereof. So it's critical that you upgrade identity with your new visions and goals. The next layer of this is you need to stop what's no longer needed. In other words, there were behaviors and thoughts you've had in the past that were needed to produce the results you currently have. But you need to stop what's no longer needed. Maybe you're continuing a behavior in your life that's no longer needed. Maybe

you're continuing a thought or a worry that at one time was needed but no longer is. Maybe there's a stress or an anxiety or a belief you're holding true to be about yourself that maybe you needed at some point in your life that you no longer need. It could be something to protect yourself from fear, to protect yourself from harm, or to serve you in getting through a certain circumstance. But if we're not conscious of dropping a thought or a behavior that's no longer needed, we take old thoughts, old behaviors that serve an old version of ourselves into trying to become the new version of ourselves. So ask yourself that question. What do I need to drop that's no longer needed? Is

it a person? Is it a thought? Is it a behavior? Or is it an emotion? One of those things you probably are carrying with you from the past that maybe you needed to get through a circumstance. Maybe you needed to get through a relationship, through a setback, through a failure, or just to produce the results you currently get. But that thought, that behavior, that emotion, that person is no longer needed for you to go to the next level of your identity, the next level of your performance, the next level of yourself. And then finally is this, if you're stuck, you're stuck in a story. That's where you're stuck. There's a story

you're telling yourself that doesn't serve you anymore, and you have to evaluate what that story is. I'm serious, right? If you say, Ed, I'm kind of stuck where I am. But what you need to do is you need to alter your associations. You need to do something in a short window of time, no question about it. You definitely need to evaluate what is no longer needed and evaluate the story you're telling yourself. There's all kinds of stories we tell ourselves that don't serve us anymore. This is critical. Maybe it's a story about your past, a story about your parents, a story about a previous relationship,

a story about a success you used to have. You keep talking about that doesn't serve you to get to the next level. If I can be real with you, whatever you've achieved up to this point, that story you keep talking about, every second you spend in that old story about what you've achieved, your degree,

some business you had, one thing you were real successful at in the past, every time you live in that story, you're you were real successful at in the past. Every time you live in that story, you're stripping time and focus from the new story. What's the new story you're telling yourself? You can't have a new identity without a new story. What's the old story you keep repeating? Maybe it's not a success.

Maybe it's a failure that you've had. It was a business setback. It was the market turn. It was the economy. It was someone who did you wrong, a relationship that let you down, a business partner who wasn't consistent, a failure you've had, a poor decision you made, a mistake you made in your life. And you're repeating this story to yourself, simultaneously trying to create a new identity. You can't take that old story into the new identity. One of the things we

have to do to create a new identity is to begin to tell a new story. What's your new story? Who are you now? What are you all about now? Where are you going now? What's this new version of you? See, here's what's amazing. At any point in your life, you can just decide to write a new script. You can decide to become a whole new character. See, the leading character in the story of your life is you. And guess what? You and God control the script. You could write a new script at any time you want. Listen to me. At any time you want, you can simply decide to be a new character. I'm strong now. I'm beautiful now. I'm handsome now.

I'm bold now. I'm funny now. I'm bold now, I'm funny now, I'm smart now, I'm going there now. Stop telling the old story. Here's the truth, nobody cares. No one cares if you had a failure, no one cares if you've had a setback, no one cares if you had a victory, and none of those failures, none of those setbacks, none of those victories, and that old character you keep playing is the very thing that will prevent you from becoming this new version of you. It's a story if you're stuck. It's an old story you're telling with an old character that was last year's version, last decade's version. Who's the new character? What's the new script? What's the new story?

I must tell you I have a lot of weaknesses, a lot of things I do that don't serve me. But this identity thing, I get this. It's the key. Now, there's a lot of little, mini things in life that matter. There's never one thing. If you said, what's the key? I can tell you, it's my addiction and my obsession

to working on my identity. It's the thought of mine that dominates most of my thinking, that's number one. So I'm conscious of the concept, that's huge. Just being aware of the concept will put you light years ahead of 99.9% of the, just awareness of the power of identity, just now you knowing about the thermostat puts you in the.1% of all the people on the spinning earth right now.

And then the next thing I'm really focused on is always adding people to my life in the areas that matter to me that live at higher temperatures than me. The second thing is I'm constantly doing things in short bursts of time to change the water line. I'm also super obsessed with dropping what's no longer needed. There were certain things I needed to think and do and say

or people I needed to be around, emotions I needed to have that got me say or people I needed to be around, emotions I needed to have that got me to the place I'm currently at. I'm evaluating all the time. What is no longer needed? What emotion? What anxiety? What thought? What belief? What person? What behavior is no longer needed in my life? And then lastly, I never tell the old story. I don't like telling the old story. I'm constantly trying to write the new script, become the new character in my life. And it could just be the new emotions, it could be the new

beliefs I have, it could be the new story, the new place I'm moving, but I'm constantly retelling a new story all the time. I'm constantly obsessed with writing the next chapter of my life, not reading the previous ones. The happiest and most fulfilled people don't read the past chapters of their life, whether they're good or bad. They are writing new ones all the time. These are the keys of changing the internal thermostat of our lives and ultimately are the keys of changing the external circumstances of our lives. I know today helped you. Introducing Tim's new infuser energy beverages made with natural caffeine.

They come in two refreshing flavors, Blackberry Yuzu and Mango Starfruit. Try them today, only at Tim's. At participating Tim's restaurants in Canada for a limited time. It's time for Tim's. With Uber Reserve, good things come to those who plan ahead. Family vacay? Reserve your ride as soon as you book your flights.

To all the planners, now you can reserve your Uber ride up to 90 days in advance. See Uber app for details. Very short intermission here, folks. I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far. Don't forget to follow the show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way.

Here's the thing. If you're feeling helpless, one of the antidotes to feeling helpless is to get more helpful. And one of the ways you can be most helpful is to raise your own identity. Our identity is the core part of our lives. We're not going to outperform our identity. Our identity, best said, is it's the thoughts, concepts concepts and beliefs we hold to be the most true about ourselves. It's really the invisible force in all of our lives that holds us back or can accelerate our success, our bliss, our achievements to whole new levels. If you

look at identity, if you think about it, it's almost like it's the life thermostat. See in this room right now there's a thermostat sitting on that wall right now and if it's set at 75 degrees this room is going to be regulated to 75 degrees. No matter what the external conditions are it could be a hundred degrees outside the external factors do not impact the internal thermostat in this room. It's 75 degrees consequently also if it was 40 degrees outside the heater will come on it'll heat this room to 75 degrees. That's how your identity works. It's the internal thermostat of

your life and that's why very often let's say that you know relationships or financially you're a 75 degree-er and if you ever notice in your life as you start to heat life up a little bit starts to go pretty well maybe your relationships blissful and loving and incredible or financially you've increased your results you're at 80, 85, 90, 100 degrees of success financially or in business and then it just seems coincidental but somehow some way the air conditioner kicks on in our lives you know a car breaks down an event happens we lose an account something takes place and all of a sudden we look up and boom life's back

at 75 degrees of relationship of of money, of business. That wasn't by coincidence. It is the regulator of your life, is your identity. And so if you, you can do all the right things, all the activities, all of the thinking, all of the execution part, but if you don't increase what you believe you're worth, if you don't increase that identity, that thermostat of your life, you will find a way to cool your life back down to what you believe you deserve. And so one of the keys for me in my life is not just getting better at the mindset of life and the execution of business or strategy, but raising that

identity so that I'm at 85, 90, 100, 120 degrees, so that I believe I'm worthy of as my execution and my thinking reaches the same level, that thermostat setting, that life setting will change. It's not the external conditions of our life that dictate the terms, it's that identity, it's that thermostat setting. So we got to get more helpful if we feel helpless and the way we do that is by increasing our own identity, that thermostat setting. That sounds great doesn't it? So how do you do that? Well I call it the holy trilogy of shifting one's identity and that is faith, intention, and association. That's the three things you must work on

in order to increase your thermostat setting. Number one, faith. For me, it's the center part of my life, is that I have a God who loves me, that believes in me, that wants to see me successful, wants to see me prosper, wants to have favor in my life, wants me to feel comfort and peace. And so I find oftentimes it's interesting people of faith sometimes, God's in their life Sunday at church when they're worshipping or they're in

Bible study or when they're eating a meal they'll pray over it, but somehow when they walk into a business meeting, a speech, a boardroom, a client environment, they leave God at the door and they think they're on their own. So for me if you're a person of faith and God is with you all the door and they think they're on their own. So for me, if you're a person of faith and God is with you all the time, and he loves you all the time, and he comforts you all the time, that includes business.

That includes every area of your life. It includes him wanting to bless you with a great relationship, bless you financially, bless you to the best of your abilities in business. And then whatever the other, if you're an athlete watching this, bless you in that at bat, over that pot,

catching that football, hitting that shot. And so number one source of shifting your thermostat study is reconnecting again with your faith and allowing yourself to feel it inside all the other environments that exist. Then there's number two, there's your intentions. See, I don't think enough people give themselves credit for having great intention. There's a power to intention in our lives. And so what most of us think is I'll feel better about myself or I'll be more confident when, when I get that job, when I get that relationship, when I get this amount of money, when I get that house, when I hit that home run, when I'm hitting a certain average, right? And so you're always chasing your tail. If your identity

and your confidence is contingent upon producing a result that has not yet existed, it's pretty difficult to catch it,'t it if you have to have it to get it in the first place. Instead of saying maybe I ought to get credit and I ought to be worthy of more because I intend to do well. As a young man in business I started to figure out you know I I may not have all the answers, I may not be the smartest, the best looking, the most articulate, my IQ isn't 250, but I intend to serve. I intend to make a difference. I make mistakes, but overall I'm a good person who wants to do good in the world, and I should be favored because of that.

Not enough of you are giving yourself credit for your intentions. You want to shift your identity overnight, connect with your faith. You want to double shift it, connect with your intentions. identity overnight, connect with your faith. You want to double shift it, connect with your intentions. So when I go into a business meeting, or I go into a lunch, or I'm going into any type of encounter, even in my golf life, when my sport I play, I remind myself that I've got a God who loves me, who wants me to win, and wants me to be blessed, who wants me to be favored, who wants me to feel peace. Number two, I intend to do good. I'm a decent human being and you know what,

good things ought to happen to good people. And then third is association. You are who you hang around. See if you're a 85 degree or 75 degree or financially but you start hanging around someone say like myself who lives at 100 to 40, 150 degrees of finances and wealth and abundance, you will get heated up by proximity to somewhere in between the two of us and a lot closer to where I am than where you are. Same thing in relationships. If you want to have a great loving relationship in your life, but you're living at 75 degrees in your relationships, you start hanging around people who are in loving beautiful relationships. Your thermostat setting will increase. Same within your faith life.

If you want to start walking with more faith in your 75 degrees of faith, if you start hanging around people who walk their faith life at 100, 150 degrees, you'll be heated up through proximity. And so these are the three things we do in order to shift our lives. Our identity is the governor on our life. It is the most powerful force in the world. It's the invisible force that governs everything, is that thermostat setting. And then if that's true, the way we shift it is always going to be our faith, our intentions, and our associations. And those associations are so huge. I know you've all heard, you're the product of who you hang around the

most often, but look at the last 90 days of your life. Okay, and ask yourself this question. Other than say your spouse or children, who are the two or three, four people you've spent the most time with? Picture their faces and their lives right now. And then I want you to measure one thing. What's their emotional maturity like? See what I find with all successful people is they have a degree of emotional maturity that other people are absent of. So I always measure what's their emotional maturity? How do they handle success? How do they handle failure? How do they handle their lives? Then ask yourself this. These three or four people you've been around, can you

immediately name two or three things that they have in their life in an area that matters to you? Let's say it's money, let's just say it was money, that they have that you don't have that you wish you did have, or in relationships, can you name two or three things in their relationships that they have that you wish you had, or in business, or in their physical body?

And if you can't immediately go, yeah, they got two, three, four things,, man I would love to have that in my life, then I'm not so sure that that's the person you ought to spend the most time with. The reverse question is also, hey can you name two or three things they have that you definitely don't want? When you look at their financial life, if finances are important to you, do they have two or three things going on in their life financially you definitely want no part of? Or in their relationship life, you know, if you want a better relationship, if you look at the relationship there are two or three things like I wouldn't want that relationship,

I don't like the way he or she treats them, or they get treated, you can look at that. Or their physical body, you want to be in really great shape, you look at them, do they have two or three things about their health or wellness that you don't think are really great? Well, that's an immediate sign maybe they're the wrong people. And so taking an evaluation of who your associations are, are they emotionally mature, do they have the two or three things you would like to have in your life, they have in theirs that you'd like to get heated up and get, or do they have two or three things you want to avoid. These are signs that you should be away

from them. So the way we get more helpful is we increase our identity and we increase our identity by working on our faith, our intention and our associations. If you do those three things, I believe you're gonna live happier, you're gonna help other people become happier, you're gonna make a contribution in people's lives that's deeper and more meaningful than you've ever made before. And by the way, lastly, that's what you were put here to do. You were put here, you were born to do something great with your life in small ways and big ways. You were made to do something awesome with your life. Maybe not all of it's going to get limelight or notoriety, but you were born to make a difference

in the world. And the more you realize that, the more you step into your intention, the more you step into the person you're capable of becoming, the more you just decide, I'm raising that thermostat setting. I'm no longer this other character I was playing. At any point you and God are the authors of your life. You can grab the pen and start to write a new chapter and say, I'm stepping into this new character. Their identity is higher. They're more faithful. They're focused on their intentions more often. They improve their associations and they help people. Well, I hope I'm doing that for you.