THE ED MYLETT SHOW - The 3-Step Mind Routine That Attracts Anything You Want | Ed Mylett

Episode Date: July 18, 2026

What if the life you want isn't waiting for luck to find you, but for you to become the person who can attract it? In this mashup episode, I bring together some of my favorite conversations about one... of the most misunderstood concepts in personal growth: attraction. I'm not talking about wishful thinking or hoping the universe magically hands you your dreams. I'm talking about becoming the kind of person whose mindset, habits, standards, and energy naturally pull the right opportunities, relationships, and success into your life. Ryan Pineda, Lewis Howes, Jay Shetty, Dan Martell, Tom Bilyeu, and I dive into what it really takes to create a life that reflects your highest potential instead of your biggest fears. Ryan Pineda and I unpack why discomfort is often the greatest advantage you'll ever have. We discuss why success isn't about escaping hard work, but learning to love the process of becoming. Lewis Howes and I explore confidence, intention, and why the promises you keep to yourself ultimately shape the person you become. Jay Shetty reminds us that greatness isn't measured by how many people know your name. It's measured by how many lives you impact through service. Every one of these conversations reinforces the same truth. The person you become is far more important than the things you accumulate. Dan Martell and I talk about becoming "the one" who changes the trajectory of your family and your future. We discuss how the mistakes you're most ashamed of may actually become the greatest qualification you have to help someone else. Tom Bilyeu and I break down why time is one of your greatest assets and how intentionally designing your days allows you to create extraordinary momentum. Throughout these conversations, I also share the three step mental routine that has transformed my own life by helping me focus on what I want instead of what I fear. I truly believe you were born to do something extraordinary with your life. The challenge is that too many people spend their lives operating from old conditioning, fear, and limiting beliefs instead of intention and possibility. When you begin to change your thoughts, raise your standards, and intentionally pursue the emotions and life you truly desire, everything around you begins to change. The opportunities were always there. You simply become the person capable of seeing them. Key Takeaways: • Why your thoughts become the currency you use to purchase your future • Ryan Pineda on embracing discomfort as the foundation for long term success • Lewis Howes on building confidence by keeping the promises you make to yourself • Jay Shetty's reminder that serving others is one of the fastest paths to living a meaningful life • Dan Martell on becoming the person who changes your family's future and why your greatest struggles often become your greatest strengths • Tom Bilyeu's practical strategies for mastering time and creating momentum every single day • Why intention, repetition, and environment shape the life you ultimately attract • How changing who you are on the inside transforms what becomes possible on the outside You are far closer to the life you want than you think. One decision, one new belief, one courageous action, and one more intentional day can completely change your future. I hope this episode reminds you that you were never meant to live an average life. You were born to do something great, and that journey begins with the person you choose to become today. 👉 SUBSCRIBE TO ED'S YOUTUBE CHANNEL NOW 👈⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠   → → → CONNECT WITH ED MYLETT ON SOCIAL MEDIA: ← ← ←  ➡️ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠INSTAGRAM⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠   ➡️⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠FACEBOOK⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠   ➡️ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠LINKEDIN⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠   ➡️ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠X ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠  ➡️ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠WEBSITE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:01:19 Now on with the show. All right, welcome back to the show, everybody. I'm so excited to spend this time with you here this week answering a question I keep getting from millions of you, which is, Ed, how do I begin to attract into my life the things that I want and need the things out of my life that I don't want? It's a pretty important question. I don't know that you could ask them more. important question. And so I'm here today to try to help answer that for you. Now, here's the good news.
Starting point is 00:01:43 The good news is this. There are people who have become great at this. Yes, there are people who become great at attracting into their lives the things they want and getting things out of their life they don't want. Quite frankly, I've become one of them. I've studied them for many years, and I think I've become very good at doing that. I've coached many of them and continue to coach many of these people who are attracting things into their life that most people can only dream of. And let me tell you, these are things like the body you want, the relationships you want, the money you want, the emotions you want to experience, the memories you want to have. You can begin to attract those things into your life.
Starting point is 00:02:18 And there's a science and an art form to doing it. Now, first, let me give you the good news. The good news is that there's a truth about you that I want you to hear. You ready? Yes, you. You were born to do something great with your life. Let me say that to you again, so you hear it for all the people in the back. You were born to do something great with your life.
Starting point is 00:02:41 And maybe it's been a long time since someone's reminded you of this. Maybe no one's ever told you. So I'm here to let you know that. Now, here's the thing that's interesting about doing something great with your life. You probably won't know when you're doing it. Because we think about only the big things in our life, you know, did I have this big award, this big promotion, this big circumstance happened. But oftentimes, the things in life that are very small end up being very big.
Starting point is 00:03:04 For example, the man who helped my father get sober. that night where he helped my dad in the situation of my dad was going to lose his life or lose his family. That man didn't know that that small, kind gesture of helping my father, he didn't even know if my dad would stay sober. He didn't know he was doing something great. He didn't think he would. Heck, this guy was an alcoholic and a drug addict himself at one time. So he certainly didn't think he was doing something great.
Starting point is 00:03:27 But little did he know that that man would become sober and help thousands of other people get sober in the next 35 years. Little did he know that that man's son was me. and that I've had the blessing of making hundreds of millions of dollars and inspiring millions of people on every continent in the world. Little did they know that little thing that didn't seem like he was doing something great was changing millions of lives in that moment. So you won't know when you're doing it. But you were born to do it. You were born to live a great life. You were born to be happy.
Starting point is 00:03:57 You were born to contribute. You were born to make your dreams come true. And so I want to remind you of that. Now, here's the sad fact. 95% of people will live their entire life and never do it. Maybe more. They'll go their entire life and never live a life that they want. They'll never make their dreams come true.
Starting point is 00:04:17 They'll never have success. By the way, what is success? Success to me is having a very clear picture of what you want. And then eventually your life matches that picture. But I don't even think you have to have that to be successful. I think success, by definition, is have a very clear picture of what you want. and be in the process of making progress towards making that a reality. Obviously, the ultimate success is achieving the life you dream of.
Starting point is 00:04:41 But progress towards a worthy goal, a worthy vision in your life is the pathway to success. So why don't most people make it? Why don't most people? They go their whole life, they never really live. They react because they live in the physical world. They don't control their thoughts. I want you to remember this. Thoughts are the currency with which you purchase your dreams.
Starting point is 00:05:03 thoughts are the currency with which you purchase your dreams and your vision. If you can begin to change the way you think, literally you can begin to change your life. But most people only operate in the physical world. They're not cognizant. They're not aware of even who they are. They don't even know who they are. And because they don't know who they are, they operate in the physical all the time. And so they're constantly reacting to what's happening around them and they never dictate the terms.
Starting point is 00:05:29 See, I don't think you lack vision in your life. You know, the Bible says where there's no vision, the people will perish. Well, listen to me, I think you probably have some type of a vision for your life. If I asked you, do you want to be happy or sad? Which vision do you have? Which dream? Happy. Rich or poor?
Starting point is 00:05:44 You'd probably say rich. Whatever that means to you. Rich in spirit, rich financially, rich in friendships, rich in love. You'd say rich. Do you want to be physically strong and healthy and have energy? Or be out of shape and lack energy and have poor health? You'd have a vision for the health, right? loving relationships or no relationships. Great memories or no memories. You have a vision.
Starting point is 00:06:06 Your issue is depth perception. You think it's further away than it is. And because you think it's there, you've created patterns and beliefs and behaviors in your life that perpetually keep it that far away. And then eventually you just kind of forget you belong there anyway. But remember this. Your dreams, the visions of your life is God's way of giving you a preview as to what's possible. He doesn't play jokes on you. It's not some joke or some hallucination. It's what's possible. And it may not showing up the way you like it. It may not end up being what you like. Heck, you could be married to somebody right now that you love very much, but they weren't the picture you had when you envisioned your dream man or woman, right? But they make you feel the way you dreamed.
Starting point is 00:06:49 So oftentimes our dreams will show up in different packages than we imagine, but they'll give us what we really want, which is the emotion we want to experience. And so how do we begin to change our lives. What are the keys to doing it? So I'm going to give you a few of them today. One is believing that. Why? Because you will never rise above what you believe you deserve in your life. You may do it temporarily, but that's why you'll see certain people get in really good shape and then they get out of shape. They make a bunch of money and then they lose it. They get in a loving relationship and then it ends. You will never long term in your life exceed what you believe you deserve to have, what you believe you're worth. And so these thoughts matter. Most people go through their whole life, never
Starting point is 00:07:28 really knowing who they are. And because they don't know who they are, they can't change their world. Internal change is the key to changing the external things in your life. So, who are you really? Let's think about this for a minute. I say, I don't think you know who you are. And you go, no, no, no, I'm Joe Jones. No, you're not. That's two names your parents gave you. But that's not who you are. Are you your body? When you don't show up to work on a given day, do you say, body won't be there? You say, I won't be there. You know, my dad, when he passed away, I had the honor of spending the next hour in the room with his body. My sisters weren't real comfortable doing it. My mom was still very, very sad. And so I was left with my dad's body
Starting point is 00:08:20 in the room waiting for the hearse to arrive to take my father. And you would think that that was one of the saddest moments of my life. But the truth is, it was one of the most beautiful moments of my life. Because it was the greatest confirmation of my entire life that were spiritual beings. Because something dawned on me immediately when I was there with my dad's body. And let me tell you what it was. Dad's gone. Dad's no longer here.
Starting point is 00:08:45 His body was, but it was very clear to me, very apparent. My father was gone. So my dad wasn't his body. My dad was a spirit. And so when you begin to understand that you live in a spiritual existence and that thoughts have energy, thoughts have a vibrational frequency, you have a vibrational frequency. And to the extent that you can vibrate at a higher and higher speed is to the extent
Starting point is 00:09:10 you begin to draw into your life, the things that you want. The law of attraction means two things. We will eventually draw into our lives what we believe we're worthy of and we deserve and that we most passionately want, we also draw into our lives who we are. We will eventually draw to our lives. We attract who we are. Why is that? So let's go through this for a minute. You really two things affect change in your life. Remember this. Repeated thought creates change. And the more thought is repeated, the more it vibrates at a higher frequency. The more repetition it has, the more often it happens. That's when people say, I'm vibrating at a higher frequency.
Starting point is 00:09:45 All that really means. That's why there's power to prayer. Because the, the, the more and more you do it, there's a frequency to it, there's a connection, there's a spirit that takes place. You know, when you pray, you're talking to God. And I do it many times a day. I do it on my knees every day, as many of you know, and I do it on my knees because it reminds me how small I am, and I'm not this body. And then I need something greater than me to help me, to guide me, to give me comfort, to give me strength, to give me insight. So one of the things that people that attract into their lives, the things that they want have, many of them are praying people. Praying is when you're talking to God. Listen to me on this. Intuition is God talking back to you.
Starting point is 00:10:29 These people have learned to trust their intuition. Trust their intuition. Prayer is you talking to God. Intuition is God talking back to you. And oftentimes, it's a whisper. And if you can't get quiet, you can't get inside your own spirit, you won't hear it. There are other times in your life where that intuition is screaming at you. We usually answer those, but it's the whispers we often miss. Why is that? How do we begin to change our thoughts? Because you are, believe it or not, your life right now is a direct reflection of what you've been thinking about.
Starting point is 00:11:01 It's hard to say that. It's hard to believe it. No, someone took advantage of me. Listen to me. You have to accept that your life right now is a real reflection of what you believe you're worth and you deserve. And you're just getting it. It's hard to accept because there's been people hurt you or tend. from you, but believe me when I tell you, these same people will keep showing up in different
Starting point is 00:11:20 bodies in your life. You ever have that friend, she keeps dating that same guy or that he keeps dating that same girl? They look different. They're a different name, a different body, but it's the same damn person doing the same damn things. That's the rest of your life's that way as well. The kinds of people that come around, the money that comes around, the emotions that come around. They may show up in different packages, but it's the same thing until you change the thoughts. Why is that? Two things. Two things make our lives what they are. Number one is conditioning. you've been being conditioned since the minute you were born. You've been conditioned since you were an infant.
Starting point is 00:11:52 You've literally learned to think. And by the way, some of that conditioning, if you come from a good family, is really wonderful. But not all of it is. And some of it will serve you in some areas and others. But you've been conditioned by the people that raised you since you were an infant to actually think like they think, to have the emotions that they have oftentimes,
Starting point is 00:12:08 the languages and the words they use. You literally speak a language right now that you learned from your parents or whoever raised you. If you speak English, you learned that language. Infants are that easy to imprint. You learn that language. You have a friend who might be bilingual. They speak, let's say Spanish and English. Is it not amazing to you that their children can learn both languages simultaneously? That's how much conditioning impacts a child. By the way, if a family speaks five or six languages in a home, the children will very easily learn all five of six of those languages when they live with them. That's how much conditioning is imprinted in a child. That's how much conditioning is imprinted
Starting point is 00:12:45 child and how easy it is. The complexity of thoughts and words and actual, the actual language someone uses is conditioned by their parents. That's why you speak the language you speak right now. You didn't study it in a book. You literally had an imprint and conditioned into you as a child. That's the power of conditioning. Now, the good news is, if you mean to take control of your thoughts, you can reverse and re-engineer and recondition yourself to begin to think differently. The reason you have the language you have or the thoughts you have is they were repeated over and over and over and over and over again. And they begin to vibrate at a very high frequency. And when they do that, they're imprinted inside of who you are and then your external life reflects this. But what most people try to do in their life is they operate in the physical world rather in the three planes I'm going to discuss in a minute.
Starting point is 00:13:37 So number one is conditioning. Number two is environment. It reinforces what's around you. You know this. You are your environment. whichever around you, whoever you hang around, whoever the people are that are around you, you begin to behave, think, and act like them. So imagine the compounding of conditioning of these things that happen, and then your environment. So the environment reinforces the conditioning and the conditioning reinforces the environment. And so to change our lives, we change two things. We change our conditioning and we change our environment. You can change one or you can change both.
Starting point is 00:14:10 There's a magnified power to changing your conditioning, your thinking over and over again, and your environment. The good news is you can absolutely do this because we attract into our life what we believe we're most worthy of and what we think about. Our mind moves towards what we're most familiar with. So if you can begin, this may sound simple, to simply begin to force and place your thoughts on the things you want, the people you want, the life you want, the emotions you want, you will become familiar with them and you will begin to recondition yourself. And if you then wrap that around an environment of people who will support it, you become pretty damn powerful. And that's how you begin to change your life. That's why listening to my podcast matters.
Starting point is 00:14:54 See, there's the two best books I've ever read are the power of one more by this guy, Ed Milette, other than my scriptures, by the way, and think and grow rich by Napoleon Hill. And Napoleon Hill in his book says so many brilliant things. I've read it maybe 30 times. But one thing he talks about is education, you know, learning things. You listen to my podcast to be educated. You go to seminars to be educated, right? We went to college if we did to be educated. But what he says a real educated man has, and by the way, in these days they called it an educated man. Now it's an educated person. So I'll read it correctly. An educated person is not necessarily one who has an abundance of general or specialized knowledge. An educated person is one
Starting point is 00:15:34 who has so developed the faculties of their mind that they may acquire anything they want or its equivalent without violating the rights of others. One more time, okay? Because this is how you change your life. An educated person is not necessarily one who has an abundance of generalized or specialized knowledge. An educated person is one who has so developed the faculties of their mind that they can acquire anything they want
Starting point is 00:16:00 or it's equivalent without violating the rights of others. So it's our minds. Trust me, I'm one of these people. I've been blessed to come from an average ordinary back, ground. Some might even say dysfunctional and produce an abundance of wealth, an abundance of great relationships, an abundance of beautiful emotions and memories, an abundance of contribution in changing the world. And I'm not special. I'm not a particularly educated person. I've got a communications degree and I was an average student. But I have the type of education he's describing. I understand
Starting point is 00:16:33 me. And we'll begin to understand ourselves, then we can change. And that starts with an evaluation of your thinking. I know this is good, isn't it? So, who are you? We've already established you're not your body. You're not your name. You're not those things. So who are you? So I jumped on my boat this morning to get over here to the studio. Got a compliment on my shirt. Guess where I got it. Quince. One thing I love about summer is how easy everything feels. The days are a little bit more relaxed. And I find myself, you know, I'm reaching for the same comfortable, go anywhere pieces kind of again and again. And that's why I keep coming back to Quince. They focus on well-made essentials at become everyday staples that you can live in but still look good all season long. Quince's
Starting point is 00:17:15 100% European linen pants and shirts. They're breathable, really easy to throw on and they upgrade your rotation needs and your outfits too. By the way, starting at 34 bucks. It's a no-brainer. Their teas are soft enough to live in every day. I'm living in one right now. And the lightweight cotton sweaters are exactly what you want when summer cools down. So make your summer wardrobe easier. go to quince.com slash ed for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. Now available in Canada, too. That's Q-U-I-N-C-E.com slash ed for free shipping and 365-day returns. Quince.com slash ed. Hey guys, as a lot of you know, I've been taking IM8 for a couple years now. I've been talking about it on on the show for a long time. Here's what it is. IM8 is the way to simplify your supplement routine once and for all. It's what it's done for me. 16 supplements.
Starting point is 00:18:04 replaced 90 ingredients across nine major organ systems in one drink. IM8's Daily Essentials has 16 supplements in that drink, like I said, for $2.61 a day. It was founded by David Beckham and a bunch of other people. It's built by leading doctors and researchers. I feel great on IM8. I can't emphasize that enough, and I really believe you would as well. So go to IM8health.com slash ed right now or click the link in the description and use code ed for a free welcome kit, five free travel sachets plus 10% off your order.
Starting point is 00:18:37 That's code ed at IM8health.com slash ed. Code ed at IM8health.com slash ed. These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, prevent any disease. I believe you're a spiritual creature. So I think you live, I think there's three elements to you. Three. That comprise the physical and spiritual you.
Starting point is 00:19:02 So you have three things. You have your physical body. It's attached to you right now. It won't be forever, but it's attached to you for right now. You have your intellect and your ability to think. And then you're a spiritual creature. Those are the three elements. So although my name is Ed Milet, that's not who I am.
Starting point is 00:19:23 Although I might have a certain size bicep or waist or that's not who I am. Who I am is all three of those things and who I am. permanently as I'm a spiritual creature. So having said all of that, how do we begin to change it? We have to begin to change it by repeatedly thinking about the things that we want in our life, repeatedly thinking about our dreams, beginning to believe that we were born to do something great. And living life, listen to me, with the expectation that great things are going to come. You have to begin to live your life with the expectation that great things are coming your way, that you look for that as opposed to the problem.
Starting point is 00:20:02 You look for the blessing as opposed to the curse. You assume great things are going to come into your life. And when you begin to do that, you properly begin to move towards the things that you want. You'd be amazed that things that begin to become real to you when you're repeated. If you ever had that thing where you're repeatedly thinking about somebody and all of a sudden they text message you? And you're like, how did that just happen?
Starting point is 00:20:24 Or you've got something you're really focused on doing. And then there's something on TV that's the exact topic. How does that happen? Those things were always there, but they were outside of your awareness because you were not obsessed with them. The reticular activating system in your brain reveals to you the things that matter the most that you believe most deeply. So if you believe you're a victim or you believe bad things are going to happen and you live in that expectation, the world is going to reveal to you the circumstances that make that to be true. This is a fact. And by the way, it may be true. But if you believe, I overcome the fact that I've got these deficiencies. I overcome the fact that I don't come from the perfect family or look the perfect way or the right race or the right ethnic sex or the right religion or whatever the world thinks is right, which there is no right.
Starting point is 00:21:09 But because I don't have all the decks stacked in my favor, I overcome it anyway and when anyway you begin to have those things enter your life, the people, the things, the meetings, the thoughts, the emotions come your way. And then what happens is you begin to get enthusiasm and enthusiasm and is an energy frequency. And when you meet an enthusiastic person with high energy vibrational frequency, highest energy always influences lowest energy. More certain person influences less certain person. So if I'm more certain I'm going to win than you are than I'm not. If I've got higher energy frequency than you do and you're up against me, I will defeat you. Because in life we get what we most believe we deserve. And so if you can pour enthusiasm and passion into these thoughts that you have and repeat them regularly, You recondition yourself and then surround yourself in an environment. Remember this.
Starting point is 00:22:02 Why is the environment matter? Here's a quantum physics saying, particles themselves are not responsible for their own creation. That means they don't create themselves. It's created by the environment, right? And so when we begin to change our thinking, we change our environment. We begin to expand. This is true of everything in the world down to particles. And that's what that body of yours is.
Starting point is 00:22:25 Right? And so the way you use the body is to understand this concept of the mind. And we begin to move our physical bodies. We change things. And the outside world begins to shift to comply with what we know we're worth. It will shift for you. It will begin to comply with you as opposed to conspiring against you. I promise you.
Starting point is 00:22:47 You've got to begin to think that the world will comply with your will. And then you add to that prayer where it's being blessed. See, one of the things I do very often because it's part of my intention. Intent matters. Intent matters. Desire matters. See, when you have a dream, it's just a dream like a wish. But when you move to desire and then you shift to intention, something happens.
Starting point is 00:23:13 You begin to ask for help. You begin to ask others for help. And in my case, I can't tell you how many times I've just prayed and said, Lord, I need help with this. I need to understand this better. I need more people in my life. I need the meeting. I need this.
Starting point is 00:23:30 And when I begin to do that, I find that when I pray about these things, that not too long after, he begins to talk back to me. And that's where my intuition speaks. It may not be the person, but it's an intuition. It's a whisper.
Starting point is 00:23:41 You know exactly. You've had the moments. You know exactly what I'm talking about. So what I want to challenge you to do today is just very simple, is to remember you were born to do something awesome with your life and you won't know when you're doing it. You won't know when you're doing it in big ways and small ways.
Starting point is 00:23:56 And the things that seem small in our lives may be the most significant later in our life because we don't know the ripple effects of those changes. If we can change our conditioning, if our parents can teach us to speak an entire language when we're an infant and we're not educated at all by traditional terms, I promise you we can begin to condition ourselves as adults. But you've had thousands of those repeated thoughts the other way, you have to begin to condition the new ones. When you change your environment and you begin to understand, I'm a body with an
Starting point is 00:24:23 intellect and a spiritual being, but I am not my body. I'm a spiritual being. And when I begin to work in the forms of energy, right, and vibration and vibration and repetitive thought increases the frequency, increases the vibration, I begin to shift the world around me. And our dreams and our visions become realities. And then you become one of these people who are in that 5%. Listen to me, 95% of people go to work their entire life and work a 40-hour week and end up dead broke. dead broke financially, dead broke emotionally, dead broke spiritually. 95% never lived their life. These 5% over here understand only one distinction, which is the plan I just gave you.
Starting point is 00:25:05 It's the only distinction. Here's the truth. Most people are scared to change who they are. In fact, even before that, they're a little bit scared to meet themselves. They've never spent any time getting to know themselves. When you begin to do that and you go on that understanding of who you are, your life changes. You don't want to get to this end of this life and go, I blew it. I didn't max out. I didn't make anything happen. Here's the truth. Here's the truth. Most people will live their
Starting point is 00:25:35 entire life scared. Scared? What are other people going to think? What if I fail? What if I'm not good enough? What if I don't deserve it? That's all conditioning. That's all conditioning. It's all a lie. If I can get you discouraged, I got you. No matter what you believe, if you believe in heaven and hell or whatever you believe, but if you believe there's a devil or an adversary, what can he do to get you in your life to be one of those 95s who never do anything? He just gets you discouraged. He just gets you to play scared.
Starting point is 00:26:08 I don't have to make you dumb because you're probably not, right? I don't have to make you lazy because you're probably not. I just got to make you scared. I just got to discourage you. and most people go through their whole lives living in some type of fear of a boogeyman who doesn't exist. And they get to the end of their life and they have regret because they never got to know who they truly were, their true power. They were born in the image and likeness of God.
Starting point is 00:26:33 They were born to do something great. If God is with you, nobody can stand against you. I want you to remember that today. You begin to think those thoughts repeatedly and you change who you are. That whole particle thing of who you are that makes up who you are, is to change. And you literally become a different being. When you become that different being inside, this outside world complies and you get whatever you want out of it. So let's get clear. By the way, be really clear on what you want because you're probably going to get it. Be specific to.
Starting point is 00:27:05 Don't, I want to lose weight. How much we want to like how much weight you want to lose. I want to be wealthy. How much money do you want to have? Right. I want to be happy. What are the emotions you want? Bliss, ecstasy, passion. What are they? Get clear about them because the world's going to begin to comply. and bend, you will bend the universe to comply with you because you're going to listen to that intuition, which is when God's talking back to you. It was good today, wasn't it? Very short intermission here, folks. I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far.
Starting point is 00:27:30 Don't forget to follow the show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. Now on to our next guest. So, you know, speaking of grinding and like all the adversity, while you were talking, it was making me think like, for me, you know, we're both baseball guys. Yeah. And so I just remember, I played eight years in the mind. and you know independent baseball and everything and I remember literally taking hundreds of
Starting point is 00:27:54 bus rides staying in motels and making literally 1,200 bucks a month doing that and I'm like that made me who I am today yeah where I'm like dude I'll go sit in coach I don't really care who cares coach is great compared to what I was doing yep and so it's just like when you're built in comfort you don't really flex your muscles and grow and all that I'm gonna tell you something this sounds weird. I'm not comfortable in comfort to this day. Yeah. I'm comfortable in discomfort. I'm still have a hard time being comfortable. Like if we go on vacation, man, it take me three or four days before I even unwind and then maybe I got one or two good days and then I feel like shit, I need to get back to work. And then so I'm not, I've just sort of, I'm 52. I get me now.
Starting point is 00:28:38 Yeah. I had this illusion or delusion that I'd be a dude who could sit on a beach all day. No. And that's what I would do. I just can't. Like I just, I love work. I love my work. is my sport. It's my hobby. I wasn't as good as you, so I didn't have eight years of minor league ball. I got a little brief taste. I was, I got relieved of my duties early on, but I, I love how I feel when I end a day that I busted my ass and good stuff happened. Yeah. I don't like how I feel. That doesn't mean, man, look, I've had plenty of trips to Cabo. Yeah. Where I've had a lot of tequila and a lot of golf and I didn't do a lot of work. I have done that, but I find my tolerance level for doing it is much shorter. Like, I've had a lot of
Starting point is 00:29:18 go two, three days. I'm ready to get back. I'm gonna tell you something crazy. I'm 52. I can go anywhere in the world I want to. I have never been on a vacation longer than a week. And on that one week vacation, I have never not worked some of the days. Right. So like, okay, this is going to trip people out. Like, I've never been to Europe. I haven't either. I haven't been. And to be honest with you, I had a bunch of trips scheduled and I canceled them when I was younger because stuff at work came up. And I don't really feel like I missed anything. To be really honest with you. We have a lot of commonality because we go to Cabo all the time. So I love going there.
Starting point is 00:29:51 Why do you love to go? Because you can get there in a couple hours. Yeah. It's the easiest freaking trip ever. It was the only place open during COVID. It was great. So I went to Cabo.
Starting point is 00:29:59 I go to Cabo a few times a year. Me too. And, you know, I'm going there because I like sitting on the beach for a few days. I like the service, the food, the weather. Everything's great. But I've never been to Europe for your, because like, I don't want to walk the streets and like, I don't know, see history. I don't care.
Starting point is 00:30:16 Yeah. To be honest with you, I'm not a sightseer. Yeah. I'm not, I'm going to get a lot of hate on. I just don't care. I don't want to fly 12 or 15 hours when I can just fly. Like I'm doing a speaking tour in I think it's Dubai in October. Number one thing. I'm like, oh, flight over. Yeah. You know, and then I'm going there for it's a good example. My team's playing in the tub. Like, well, you talk on this day. And I'm like, okay, so it's a day change. I go, get me in there. Get me in there. Get me to do the time. I'm like, no, it's like 20 hours of flying. I don't care. I don't, I'm not, I don't want to see it. I want to get back. I live on vacation. Yeah. So the biggest. So the biggest. So the biggest. thing I would say to someone who's relating to what I'm saying or wonders, I've built homes where I want to actually vacation and live. So my vacation is five o'clock tonight. When you're gone, I'll be smoking a cigar out there on my balcony with a nice 1942 in the glass and I'm on damn vacation. I live oceanfront, man. I got an island. I don't need to go to your version of vacation. And sometimes I go to Cabo. Even Cabo, I'm like, I just left there. It's right there. That's
Starting point is 00:31:15 Cabo. It's a little warmer. Like, what's better there is like, the food's better. Like, the service is different. That's it. And you should change your place. Yeah. So it recharge you. get back. And I don't want to steal the dream from people that want to be like travel the world. That's a, I don't even like packing when I travel. Like I just, my stuff's in my closet, man. I just go grab my shorts and go down to the beach. Like yeah. So I actually did this early on. I went to a seminar. A guy spoke. I'll never forget this. And he's like, I live on vacation. I go, that's the version I want. I don't be packing bags. Here's the other thing. Like, no one's going to to this, but like I'm introverted. I like it quiet. I don't even like hotels. Yeah. To be honest with you,
Starting point is 00:31:49 I don't like the noise other people make. I'm like I like being in my damn house. I worked real hard to get this house here and to get the other houses. So like I and I just something in my body goes, let's get back and accomplish something. Let's expand. Let's do something. I almost feel like I'm wasting away when I'm on vacation. Maybe that'll change when I'm 70. I don't know. But like, I thought by the time I was 50. Yeah. I'll be like this will be out of my system. It's just not. I love, I don't love all the work. Yeah. I love meeting the next version of me. I love more self-discovery. I love expanding my being. Like I'm addicted to that. I'm not a big drinker. I probably smoke too many cigars, but like I'm
Starting point is 00:32:28 addicted to the expansion of me. Yeah. Of my soul, of my spirit, of my being of trying to understand myself and God and life and human beings better and make a bigger impact. And you know, like that's my addiction. Yeah. No, I love, I've never heard that. I like to live on vacation. Like, I do. I live on vacation. And you see that, like, I don't have, you know, $30 million plus house on well on your way. You're head of where I was. Well, with me, even at the current stage, you know, a house that's 10% of this, right? I'm sure it's more than that. I don't like to go leave that because we have everything. Like, it's a great house. And so if I'm going to go stay at a hotel, I'm like, this has to be an upgrade. Correct. Over what I have over here, because why would I go?
Starting point is 00:33:13 Yes. So that's basically your point. One thing. thing that's changed me the last five years. I have become a little bit snooty and like when I travel where I stay. So it used to be like I tell myself, get me a good deal on something. Yeah. Even when I was rich, I was like, give me a good deal. Yeah. And then a couple of those deals weren't really good deals, you know, once I got there. So now when I do travel, I go, what's the best place? Yeah. I want to say at the best place with the best service. Yeah. No, I'm with you. And I've, I've learned to value service as like my experiences have grown. because before, I mean, look, I grew up poor as a minor league baseball player. So like even eating
Starting point is 00:33:46 Chipotle was like a sacrifice. Like, dude, man, I either make rice and chicken and it cost me two bucks or I eat Chipotle. It's five times. That was the decision. Top ramen days too. Yeah. And, you know, I remember the moment I didn't have to worry about paying for Chipotle anymore. It was like, wow, this is crazy. And then you start to, you know, try new things. And then we started going out to dinner for a hundred bucks. And they're like, wow, this is crazy. then you go to a $500 dinner with your wife and you're like, dude, this is, I understand why people pay so much for this. It's not that the food is just so much. It's the service. It's the ambiance. It's all of those things. Bro, you're, it's so funny that you say this. I've never said this in any interview. You're a good interview. This episode is brought to you by Accenture. When your advertising operations fall out of sync, everything else follows. Spotify and Accenture are working together to reinvent the rhythm of ad sales. Using automation, analytics, and smarter workflows to simplify campaign delivery and access better data across the business.
Starting point is 00:34:49 The result? Less time spent on operations, more time connecting brands with the moments and fandoms that matter most. Learn more at Accenture.com slash Spotify. Visit BetMGM Casino and check out the newest exclusive. The Price is Right Fortune Pick. BetMGM and GameSense remind you to play responsibly, 19 plus to wager. Ontario only. Please play responsibly.
Starting point is 00:35:13 If you have questions or concerns about your gambling or someone close to you, please contact connects Ontario at 1-866-531-2,600 to speak to an advisor. Free of charge. BetMGEM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with Eye Gaming Ontario. I still have these moments like, why bought the island or whatever, right? You go, did that wow you? Yeah, it did. But let me tell you, like, I still have these flashes where, like, I'll be at dinner with my family.
Starting point is 00:35:41 the bill's $280 or whatever. And I'm like, I'm paying for this and I'm not worrying about it. Like those things I used to worry about so much or like, it's amazing to me how not simple, that's more than simple, but like those things still give me great pride and joy compared to like even the big things because I had, I went so long as an entrepreneur. I could tell you how I lived, man. I had to rent an office and I was looking for a new office and I had my financial company. and I found this office building that was on the roof above a Taco Bell.
Starting point is 00:36:14 And the reason I rented this building, I signed a three-year lease, is I figured out I'd go down there and eat Taco Bell every day. And I can refill this Mountain Dew Cup here every day and not pay for a new soda. That's literally how my stupid brain thinks. So I tell you, I'm risk adverse. But like, I literally kept my office for three years because I could go get 59 cent bean burritos every single day. It wasn't good for my fitness back in the day. But anything I could do to conserve or save money or pump more back into my business.
Starting point is 00:36:38 And so now when I do go to math, Astros for dinner. It's not the best place in the world, but it's good. I'm like, I'm taking my family to dinner. And I'm not worried about this bill. This is a great feeling. That stuff is what made all the long nights, all the rejection, all the drives, all the dark houses where people know showed, all the clients who changed their mind, all the critics.
Starting point is 00:37:00 You'd be surprised at what made it worth it. This makes it worth it, but more stuff like that makes it worth it to me. Like my kids went to private school, man. I was able to educate my kids the way I was able to educate my kids the way I was wanted to yeah that made it worth it I took those arrows so my kids could go to a safe school where there's a security guard in the front and they'd have to worry like that stuff is here's the biggest thing about making your dreams come true and I've just stumbled into this lately I've been talking about it more because I've had the blessing of this happening you have these
Starting point is 00:37:28 dreams you want to make happen live on the ocean or pay off your mom's house or whatever it might be that your dream or start your foundation buy your Lambo whatever your thing is that is cool and when you make your dreams come true it blows your mind What no one tells you about busting your ass and making your dreams come true is all of the dreams of the people you love that you will make come true that you don't even know they have and that they don't even know they have. I'll give you a perfect example. I worked really hard many years when I didn't have kids. Little did I know when I was working until midnight, get up at four the next morning or whatever I had to go through. I was actually someday making the dreams come true of children that weren't even born yet.
Starting point is 00:38:07 Same with you, man. when you've been busts, some of these, most of your sacrifice, a lot of it happened before these babies were even born. Yep, yeah. The coolest thing about getting wealthy and making your dreams come true isn't what you think it is. It's the dreams you will make a reality for the people that you love in your life, some of which aren't even born yet, that you don't even know they have. That's the secret part of becoming somebody in your life that no one tells you. You can go to any summer and go, man, it's so good to buy a Lambo. It's so cool to have a jet. It's great to do. What they never tell you is there'll be literally millions of micro-dose.
Starting point is 00:38:38 dreams of the people that you love some of them some of you right now that are watching this or listening to this are working your ass off to make the dreams come true of somebody you have not even met yet in your life and may not meet for another decade yet you will do things for them because of what you're doing right now that you can't even imagine that's the biggest part yeah for me I was never a big material guy like I just started buying watches two years ago you know like I never I flew first class for the first time two years ago okay and so I never cared about it yeah And the more that I've just gone through life and bought nice things, you're like,
Starting point is 00:39:14 I mean, the watch was cool, but it's gone. After you buy it, you're like, all right, whatever. The experiences is really what matters. And so, you know, I was talking actually my team on the drive up here, it's like, man, this drive up here is an experience, like what we're doing. You know, we were talking about my daughter had two crazy parties, you know, just like over the top.
Starting point is 00:39:36 That, you know, she's two, three years old. She's not ever going to remember this. And I was like, it's not even about her or that. It's about the other kids who will never get to experience something that crazy. Can I tell you one thing about your kids, though? I'll give you some insight on this. Her soul remembers it. And her emotional imprinting remembers it.
Starting point is 00:39:54 So when you're giving your kids, when they're really young like this, these blessings of these incredible experiences, although they won't remember the actual experience when they're 25 years old, there's an emotional imprinting that creates patterns where she'll go back and pursue those same emotions of joy. and beauty and bliss in her life unknowingly. When a child is raised without those experiences and without those things with trauma or stress,
Starting point is 00:40:16 they seek those out as they get older. So these things you do for your kids, they don't have to be pool parties or money, but these emotional things that our children feel when they're young, they go seek those as patterns when they get older. So for me, when I was young, because my dad was a drinker, my emotional pattern was to worry,
Starting point is 00:40:32 was to be afraid, was to be scared, was to even be angry. And so as I became an older, man, even though conditions of my life changed, my emotional imprinting didn't change. I still was worried. I was still scared. I was still angry. So these things you do, those you're listening to this for your children now that they're young, they may not remember them, but you're creating emotional imprinting where they will pursue those patterns and those experience and those people in their lives that deliver them for them as opposed to the ones that harm them and hurt them. How does somebody
Starting point is 00:41:01 break free of that? Because so many people are listening, they had no control over that. That's how they're erased. Yeah. And, you know, you got the majority of the world who's like, well, my circumstance sucked. Yes. There's nothing I can do. Yeah. And then you have people who overcome it.
Starting point is 00:41:16 How do they do it? First is being aware of it. That's why it's so important. They listen to what I just said. You just go, that explains me. Yeah. That explains me. I got it.
Starting point is 00:41:24 Okay. So there's some imprinting that was done. So the first is when there's an emotion or a thought and you become aware of it, it loses most of its power over you. So like, for me, like, I love to create chaos in my life. No matter what's going on. I got a mix in some chaos. And I used to say to people,
Starting point is 00:41:38 man, I'm so good under stress and chaos. But what started to happen was I'd produce it unnecessarily. And I'm like, why the hell do I do this? Because I grew up in so much of it. And so once I was aware of it, now when I start to do it, I go, I'm doing this stupid shit again. You're just now, you're aware every time. Here I go.
Starting point is 00:41:56 So that one is the awareness. And then two is like beginning to live consciously. Don't be someone who just lives unconsciously where you just respond and react all of your life. Live as a conscious human being. Choose. How would I like to live? What emotions do I want to experience? Begin to pursue them intentionally. There's a massive power in your life of just intentional pursuit of something. Intentional pursuit of a goal, intentional pursuit of an outcome, intentional pursuit of a business, and also intentional pursuit of our emotions. What do we do? We set up goals every year. You teach and I teach it. What are the things you want to get done? I want the jet. I want 100 grand saved. I want to make 2 million. I want to scale my business by 20%. I want to get to 8% by 8% by.
Starting point is 00:42:36 body fat, whatever these things are, we write up down every year. Do you really want those things or do you want how they will make you feel? 8% body fat, I'd be sure that how would I feel, right? Dream relationship, how would I feel? 100 grand in the bank, a million bucks in the bank, whatever is, how would I feel? So although those are important things, how can we never get intentional about the actual feeling? What if you worked on both at the same time? Because what I found out is I've pursued the feelings and the emotions, it's been easier to produce the material things. Instead of, I did it the hard way before. I'm going to get all the stuff and then I'll feel better.
Starting point is 00:43:07 What I started to do as I got a little bit older is I want all the stuff and the things and the accomplishments and the accumulations. But I also want the feeling. So I'm going to intentionally pursue both of them. Now you're a pretty powerful human being. You're aware over your crap. You pursue the emotions you want on a daily basis because we get what we most obsess over in our lives. So if they become your obsessive thoughts, you begin to get them. And I found this, man.
Starting point is 00:43:31 I'm going through a relatively stressful. time right now. It's sort of tripping me out a little bit. I'm actually pretty blissful right now. I've actually had a great deal of peace through this season of my life. Kind of surprising myself right now. Normally, the normal me, I don't even find peace when it's good. Yeah. I don't even find peace when I'm making millions and millions and hundreds of millions of dollars. Yeah. And I'm finding peace during a trying time. Ooh, this is pretty, maybe I've grown a little bit here. Maybe this stuff I teach actually works. Right? Maybe it works. And so I would just tell you to become more intentional about what you want to feel and not just what you want to accumulate. Do both. Yeah. And this is also,
Starting point is 00:44:07 you know, for me, one of the big reasons why I wanted to have you come speak at WealthCon. Thank you. Because you bring to the table this emotional, psychological, all these things that a lot of people don't talk about, right? Like I'll come up on stage and I'll teach tactical things that I think people could do because I think very logically. Yeah, you do. And to see guys like you explain why we do what we do, I'm like, dude, we got to get Ed. Thank you. Thank you. First of, I just want to say, I'm appreciative that you're coming to speak.
Starting point is 00:44:38 Can I tell you why I'm coming? Yeah. It's you. So I've been blessed, man. The last 10 years, I have an agent, but they don't book my speaking. I'm word of mouth speaking. And I'm fortunate. I get hundreds of requests a year and I do about 80.
Starting point is 00:44:52 And now I'm pretty scrutinizing about who I vet. And one of the things I try to do is I want to show up in places where I think, here's how I term it to my team. find me people who's a stock I would buy if they were a stock. So, and in your case, I've watched your stuff over time. I've watched how you've actually watched how you've grown on camera too. And if you were a stock, I'd buy you because I think you're rising. And so if I can come and sprinkle a little whatever on that and what you're doing in your community,
Starting point is 00:45:20 what you're doing here on the show, I want to be able to do that because I didn't get into the space. It's happened, but I didn't mean it to. I'm not the king. I don't mean it that way, but like I didn't get in the space to be the king. Yeah. Or I wanted to be the king and queen maker. I wanted to build a platform big enough that I could say this person's awesome too, this person, listen to this person, almost create a space where I could elevate other people.
Starting point is 00:45:41 And that's what I do on my podcast is I'm real careful of who sits in that seat because I know they're going to get millions of eyeballs and ears on them. And so when I come to speak somewhere, man, like you were the main reason that I decided to do it. And I've also just heard such good things about you from our mutual friends. And then today off camera, some personal stuff you shared with me. I'm like, this is one of my dudes now. I appreciate that. It's true. Yeah, no, I really do. For anyone who wants to come, it's October 3rd to the 6th, then Vegas. You can go to WealthCon.org and get your tickets. Actually, too, one thing that I'm also really appreciative you're doing is the dinner that we're going to have with, I think, 10 people only. I'm excited about that. Yeah. Yeah, that's cool because when you go speak to these big crowds, you know, you always leave there wishing you could have connected more personally and intimately with a small group where they're going to ask you things and feel your spirit and you don't just get sound bites, but you're in this. Yep. And so, that's,
Starting point is 00:46:30 that'll be what that dinner will be, you know, affording certain people to have and for me to have. I learn a lot of these things too, man. When I go, I get fed as much as I feed people at these events. There's always an experience I have that I cherish or I get a letter afterwards or a conversation I have. So I'm selfish doing it for me too. No, I'm excited for that. So anybody, you know, we have a new level of ticket that was specifically because Ed was willing to do that. So I think it's 10 people only. We've already sold a bunch of them. So check it out. Come join us. Yeah, we'd love it. That was a great conversation. And if you want to hear the full interview, be sure to follow the Ed Mylett show on Apple
Starting point is 00:47:05 and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. Here's an excerpt I did with our next guest. There's something unique about you, Ed, that's no one else. And I'm not saying this because you're here. I don't think I've said this to anyone on the show. There's someone unique about you that I don't think I've ever experienced around anyone else. There's an essence, there's a presence, there's a power, a command, an authority, a humble
Starting point is 00:47:27 confidence. There's like this essence about you. Thank you. And I'm really curious, what do you think made you you? What were the elements growing up that made you all the things you are now? Was it the, you know, pre-13, kind of everything that happened with your parents? Was it stuff more from school? Was it a relationship that really kind of flipped these things on for you?
Starting point is 00:47:52 What were the elements early on that made you this commanding kind presence today? Well, thank you for that. I, thank you. That's nice to hear. I, um, because by the way, I love people that have that combo. Like, I love people with a lot of self-confidence, a lot of humility. Because if people, a lot of humility that have no self-confidence, you're kind of dragging them through life as a friend.
Starting point is 00:48:12 Someone with all their self-confidence, no humility, they're going to burn out. They're going to make a mistake. They're not curious. They don't grow. I think that, I think even the reason I'm in the personal development space, why do I believe so much that people can change? I watched my dad do it. And then in my case, I had to learn these things, man,
Starting point is 00:48:28 to be like a baseline functioning person. So my default personality is insecure. Even today. Even today. Come on. Very much. Really? Very much.
Starting point is 00:48:39 How is that at the default? You wake up and you say, I'm a nobody or what? What's the story? I lack this. I'm fooling everybody. Really? They really knew, you know, pretty, some imposter syndrome mixed with just like tremendous. I was bullied as a kid.
Starting point is 00:48:54 My dad was an alcoholic. I wasn't a real big guy. the only thing I wasn't good in school. The only thing I was good at was sports. A lot like with you, you were a great athlete. So my default is tons of insecurity. So that's probably never going to go away the humility part. So the part that I've worked on really hard is the self-confidence part.
Starting point is 00:49:15 And so I've got all the stuff in the book on those tips. And what have I done to build it? Because I had to get there just to get to baseline. And then I'm like, this stuff works. What if I refined it and made it my own and started to build these other strategies and stuff? So the confidence part is the thing I'm always going to have to work on. Even today, even with all the success and the, you know, the massive show and the big businesses and all the homes and everything that people see. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:49:37 The truth is. What else do you need, though, to feel more common? I don't need other things. It's an internal game. I don't need other stuff. In other words, the stuff is really fleeting and temporary. So I don't need another, you know, I bought an island lately. You know that, right?
Starting point is 00:49:51 Like, when I bought this island, they didn't make me more confident. It just was something that I've always wanted to be able to do. But it's not stuff. What needs to happen for me is that I'm most confident when I'm living in my intention, which is to serve, which is to help other people. When I'm not doing that, Wayne Dyer, when I met him really, really young, told me, you're going to change the world, Ed Milet. And I'm sure he said this to a lot of people, but he complimented me.
Starting point is 00:50:18 I met him on a beach. We watched the sun come up together in Maui. Yeah, I was running on the beach. That's where he lived. Yeah. I was running on the beach. What was he like? I never met him. Incredible. So we became a dear friend of mine, but I'm running. You know, you get up before the sun comes up. I'm running on this. I'd won this incentive trip. And there's this bald dude running towards me with this hairy back. I'll never forget this sweaty hairy back. And it was so long ago because I had a Sony Walkman on. Wow. And he had one and he ran by me. I go, that was Wayne Dyer. And I said, Dr. Dyer, you changed my life. And he had this deep voice like mine. And he pulls his head and he goes, well, I doubt that. And he goes, I bet you changed your life. But he goes, how he goes, How did I help you?
Starting point is 00:50:56 And then he walked towards me and we'd get emotional. Like God's been so good to me. We sat on this beach together and watched the sun come up for about an hour and a half. And about an hour into it, he goes, you're going to change the world. And I'm sure he said this to a lot of people. And he's like, you're very talented, you're brilliant, you're a good communicator, you know. And he goes, and that's not the reason why. And he was writing a book at that time called The Power of Intention.
Starting point is 00:51:19 That's great book. Great book. Incredible book. And he goes, you really intend to help people. He goes, all these things with your father and your upbringing and all that ed. He goes, that's all made you. And he goes, you have such a heart to want to help people. And he goes, would you do me a favor if we never meet again?
Starting point is 00:51:35 And we ended up meeting many times. I said, yeah. He said, never link your confidence to your ability. Because I know you struggle with your confidence. If it's predicated on your abilities or your achievements, you're always going to be chasing it. He goes, but if you'd link your confidence to your intentions, man, do you have beautiful intentions? and that is something I knew about me. I know I have a good heart.
Starting point is 00:51:56 And I've never forgotten that. So when I do a podcast or a speech, I just connect to my intent, you know, and it's been the one thing that's brought me confidence. Because if you said, hey, Ed, you got to be confident because you're great or you've got a house or you have a plane, I go, yeah, but, yeah, but. But if you go, you got to be confident
Starting point is 00:52:11 because you have beautiful intentions to help you. But I go, hmm. I'm not to list you now. You might be right. Yeah, yeah. And that's where my confidence comes from. So as an athlete, I gain confidence from, results from actually getting the result of becoming better.
Starting point is 00:52:27 Yeah, that's one way to get it. Right, I was not good. And then I put in the effort and all the mistakes or the failures of the feedback, well I like to call it, gave me the lessons and taught me how to get better to accomplish the result that I was looking for. To achieve the goal, win the game, or just improve my abilities. So what I'm hearing you say is link, also link confidence to intention. Some people say link it to the effort, right?
Starting point is 00:52:51 Like the effort that you show up. You just keep showing up and others talk about the results. Should we be thinking about it? There's two, I have a whole, I call it the Holy Trilogy in the book of self-confidence. What is this? But the confidence trilogy is faith, have confidence. So if you're a person of faith, no matter what you believe in, it's amazing to me how people that believe in energy, quantum energy, or they believe in, they're a Christian like me.
Starting point is 00:53:13 And I believe in both, by the way. Yeah. But whatever their faith is, that they have it on Sunday. They have it in Bible study or they have it when they get together with their friends or when they meditate. but somehow when they walk into a business meeting, they're alone. So why are you alone then, but you're not alone these other times? So I'm never alone.
Starting point is 00:53:28 So that's number one. Number two is my intention. And third is my associations, change my confidence. But here's the biggie. If you don't have self-confidence, here's what you have. You have a really bad reputation with yourself. Yes. You have built a habit of not keeping the promises you make to yourself.
Starting point is 00:53:43 We've all heard this before. But there's a level. I have a chapter in the book called One More Standard. Here's how I built what I would call almost superhuman confidence, in spite of my insecurity. Think about that. Superhuman confidence in spite of my insecurity.
Starting point is 00:53:56 And it's exactly what you just said. It's an effort play. If you don't have self-confidence, you've never kept the promises you make to yourself. Check that box. If you have self-confidence, you've started to keep the promises you make to yourself.
Starting point is 00:54:06 If you want to have superhuman self-confidence, you keep the promises you make to yourself and one more. So if I'm going to get up and I'm going to work out, I'm going to do 10 reps in the gym, I do one more. If I'm going to do 45 minutes on the treadmill, I do one more.
Starting point is 00:54:20 If I'm going to make 10 confidence, contacts in a day, I do that and one more. But I'm going to tell my daughter I love her every day, I'm going to do that and one more. And so that higher standard, because in life, we don't get our goals, we get our standards long term. And so if your standard is one more, what starts to happen is you go, I'm willing to do things, other people aren't willing to do, and I combine that, that I have great faith, great associations, and I intend to help people.
Starting point is 00:54:45 This is a formula to build wonderful self-confidence and never lack humility when you have it. So when did you learn this one more mindset? Was this from your dad early on? Or was this from my dad. So we talked about this, you know, a little bit earlier. But my dad had these couple theories he would always say to me. And so one was when he got sober, he gave it one more try. He was going to stay sober one day at a time.
Starting point is 00:55:05 And then my dad, there's no dreaming in my house. There's no like my jet, you know, I've been blessing like multiple airplanes, right, in my life. My jet was in almost walking distance of my dad's house. He's never been on any of them. Wow. And I would say to my dad, I would say, hey, let's go play golf in me. Maui. Let's go. There's these great golf courses in the ocean and my dad would say, well, why would I go all the way to Maui to play golf with my favorite person, my son, when we can play Aaron Chino?
Starting point is 00:55:30 It's not about there. I want to be with my son. So this, my family had none of that stuff. But my dad knew I was a dreamer and my dad would always say, you know, I was one decision away from changing my life the whole time, one choice. And he'd say, Eddie, you're not as far away from these dreams as you think you are. And I'd say, really, Dad? And you go, no, you're actually a lot closer than you think. But because you think it's so far away, you behave in accordance with that belief system, and it always keeps it that far away from you. So how do we bring our dreams closer to us? The first thing is, that's a great question. The first thing is you need to believe and know that you're one decision, one relationship, one meeting, one book, one thought, one something
Starting point is 00:56:11 away from a completely different life. And when you know that, then you begin to look for them. And so in the second chapter of the book, I have a thing in the book called the Matrix. and your matrix is your reticular activating system in your brain. It's the filter for your entire life. Okay. And this filter reveals to you the world that's in front of you. Again, an example of it is, I just, I like what Musk is doing. So I just bought a Tesla.
Starting point is 00:56:33 I drove it here today. I got a Tesla too. Model X or what do you got? I got a plaid. Okay, wow. It's a good one. Nice. And so I bought this plaid.
Starting point is 00:56:39 And all of a sudden, man, everywhere I go, there's Tesla's. You know, this is everywhere. I'm like, whoa. I see everywhere. The other way. The other way, three lanes over. Other side. They're like, freaking Tesla.
Starting point is 00:56:47 This is crazy. They were always there. Why did I see them before? Because they weren't part of my RAS. So the key thing, I teach you in the book how to slow down time and create the matrix of your life. When you make the testas of your life, those relationships, those meanings, those thoughts, those encounters. You can very easily do this, but there's a process of repeated visualization you do that's not complicated. It's chapter two of the book, and it will shift you. The other component to, I have a chapter in the book called become an impossibility thinker and a possibility achiever. Here's how most people's frameworks. They don't have an RAS program. They're not intentional. So they keep getting. If the things most important to you are your worries, fears, anxieties, problems, bills, you will continue to have people, places, and things revealed to you that confirm it. And if you operate out of your memory and your history, if this is your pattern, your framework, you will continue to find those things. You need to learn to operate out of your imagination and your dreams. This is a different framework for life. Imagination is different than dreaming. Imagination causes you to create dreams and thoughts that never happened.
Starting point is 00:57:47 When you imagine something, you create a space. Once you have a thought, this is powerful. When you have a thought, you create a space that did not exist in the world before you had that thought. And that space now exists. And the way your brain works and your life works and the universe works is it tries to furnish that space, whether it's a negative or a positive thought,
Starting point is 00:58:06 it starts to hear things it wouldn't hear. That's why, like, when you're in a crowded room and they say, Lewis, you can hear Lewis auditorily over all the noise. Why it's in your RAS. It's why you see the Tesla. So the key thing is being able to operate to this imagination. Why is imagination so important?
Starting point is 00:58:21 When you were a child, three, four, five years old, you were probably happier than you are right now. Why? Two reasons. A, you were closer to God. You had just been with God more recently. And two, you operated out of your imagination. You didn't operate out of a history and a memory because you didn't have one.
Starting point is 00:58:37 And slowly over time, by the time you were 10, 11, 12 years old, loving people installed their limiting thoughts and beliefs, their software into you. Because most things in life are caught, not taught. You catch them. Wow. And so now you're starting to operate of history and memory, and you repeat it, and your RES begins to see the things that reinforce that history and memory.
Starting point is 00:58:58 And so you basically have the same life over and over again with a different cast of characters in a different environment, but the same emotions. You have the same emotional home. My dad used to say to me, every call wrote, till the day he died and I'm 50 years old, blah, blah, blah, whatever we're talking about, last thing he would always say to me, be careful. be careful. What the heck? And I go,
Starting point is 00:59:19 Careful with what? I don't know. I never knew. But what is that programming from the time you're eight years old? Be careful. Hey, go to school. Be careful.
Starting point is 00:59:26 So what that, they operate out of this fear thing, right? I need to be careful. Don't make this risk. Don't take that business. Don't start a podcast. Don't get on that stage and speak. Don't do this.
Starting point is 00:59:35 Don't do that. You say that to an already unconfident, insecure person. He meant it lovingly. By the time I'm 50 worth hundreds of millions of dollars. Be careful. He didn't even know he was saying it to me. But what was he doing?
Starting point is 00:59:45 He was installing, God bless him, his limiting beliefs into me as a little boy. So a lot of these things that you believe, you were defenseless when you started to believe them. They were installed in you by loving people who were around you. And even though your life may look differently, your emotional home, the four, five, six emotions you experience pretty regularly, might be very familiar from your parents, one or two of them, right? And so you need to look at your emotional home. What's your most powerful emotion and the emotion that you wish you could let go of? Love is the most powerful emotion in the world.
Starting point is 01:00:16 We will all do everything for love. If there were more love in the world, the way we treat one another, the way we express our thoughts, you know, you'll do anything for love, right? So love is by far my most powerful emotion. It's like, I love you. And like when I just saw you, we didn't just, like, people, we didn't just hug for like one second. Yeah. And you do this better than I do. I hold people, I make it uncomfortable because I just want to hug and love on people.
Starting point is 01:00:40 But it's not uncomfortable, bro. Right, right. Because the reason you're so successful is you truly do love people. Yeah. And you come from that place. And I know we're bigger dudes and like, like that's a beautiful expression of a man. A real man is capable of real love. That's the sign of real strength.
Starting point is 01:00:56 So that's the most powerful one. And then for me, I know the emotion that I wish I didn't have. It's chaos. Really? I, how often do you experience chaos? Less because I'm aware of it. But I'm going to tell you all the time until about five years ago, even when we first met. Why?
Starting point is 01:01:10 I used to even say this, man, I operate great under chaos. Man, you should see me operate under chaos. Most people can't handle chaos. I'm calm under pressure. Well, the reason for that was I grew up in an alcoholic home. So I'm very familiar with chaos. It became a very familiar emotion. And what we do is we gravitate towards the familiar emotions in our life,
Starting point is 01:01:29 even if they're not ones that serve us. And I don't think there's negative or positive emotions. I say this in the book. They're just are. Fear isn't negative. Fear and abundance is negative. but some fear, being afraid to do this podcast, they to some extent causes us to prepare.
Starting point is 01:01:45 So a dose of it was given to us in the caveman day so T-Rex didn't need us, right? So some fear is good. Some anxiety is okay. Some frustration, some anger is appropriate. It's to the dosage level. And we get these four or five of them. For me, some chaos is okay.
Starting point is 01:02:00 It's fun. It's exciting. It's exhilarating, right? But getting it every day, every week, every month, all the time. And so how do you get rid of it? Well, one way you get rid of it is just to be awareness.
Starting point is 01:02:09 When you have an awareness of a thought, it loses its impact and power over you. It almost becomes like this, I'll do it. I'm like, I'm doing it again, aren't I? I'm doing the chaos thing. Everything's great right now. Yeah, yeah. All the houses are paid off.
Starting point is 01:02:21 My kids are happy. Mary do a great woman, got great friends. I'm doing the chaos thing again, aren't I? You dummy, you're doing it again. And it kind of loses its power over you. So I have a chapter in the book called One More Emotion and how to take an inventory of the emotions you have. And so, yeah, man, mine is definitely love.
Starting point is 01:02:37 And the one I don't want is chaos. Because chaos causes me to act out of anger and frustration. It can depress me. And your intentions are not going to be as, I guess. It's pure. It's a gateway emotion. Chaos is my gateway emotion to the ones I don't want. Chaos gives me stress.
Starting point is 01:02:51 Chaos gives me anger. Chaos gives me frustration. Chaos gives me fear. So it's a gateway emotion. What is the result when you create from that space of chaos? It's funny. I have found the ability to externally create something pretty productive. Right.
Starting point is 01:03:07 But stay with me on this. But the process in getting there is destructive. The process in getting there is not beautiful. And I used to think, and a lot of successful people. It's forcing your way to get the results. Almost through force. Yeah. You know?
Starting point is 01:03:20 And I still do it sometimes. I'm thinking of a situation this week where I did it. And I used to think, well, that's a superpower, though, because I've created all these external. Look what I made. Look what I did. Yeah. And I'm doing it because of that.
Starting point is 01:03:32 The truth is I did it in spite of it. You did. And there's a lot of things in our lives that we have linked to our formula, our recipe of success that we hold on to, that you've done in spite of those things, not because of those things. So you're 51 now, 52, 51? When you were 40, on a scale of 1 to 10,
Starting point is 01:03:51 of the self-confident happiness joy scale, 10 being like you loved yourself fully, you were peaceful, you had an abundant mindset, you had inner peace, you know, joy, one being you hated yourself, you were miserable, you're in chaos 24-7, Where were you on that scale at 40? Okay.
Starting point is 01:04:09 The real answer is probably a three. Okay. Of happiness. Uh-huh. And but if you met me, I could convince you that it was probably an eight. That you were super happy and you had to get it. Probably a three. And since your father passing, where are you now?
Starting point is 01:04:25 Probably a nine. Really? Yeah. And I no longer feel the need to convince you. Uh-huh. Because I've learned that this has already existed within me. I didn't have to go get it. I just had to allow myself to experience.
Starting point is 01:04:36 experience it and it took me a long time to treat myself in such a way that I allowed myself to feel these things that have always been there. I had them when I was a little baby boy. I just lost them along the way in these patterns and programs that were installed in me and my experiences and I got to share something with you brother that just dawned on me. I wrote this whole book and two weeks ago. I had this. This is just for me and you, but everybody can hear it. And I've always tried to disqualify myself. I've always, you're not this. Why is that? It always shocks people, even people that know me really well. They're like, not you. I have that, but there's no way you have it, right?
Starting point is 01:05:13 Yeah, you're too confident, too talented, too, all this. And I don't know that I'm too talented, but I think I can fake it pretty well. And I disqualify myself because, you know, the truth is that maybe for a while, everything that I got that was love when I was a child only came when I achieved something. So I started to conflate early on in my life recognition and significance with love. In other words, my dad would love me if I hit the home run. My dad would love me if I get straight A's. And so then when I would feel these things. But something really amazing. And also like, I'm really big at holding myself. I love to beat myself up with mistakes I've made. I did this. I did that.
Starting point is 01:05:52 I should have done this. I didn't do that. And I've always thought these mistakes these weaknesses of mine disqualify me from being happy or helping people and this amazing breakthrough the one decision that changed my family forever is my dad's decision to get sober and it changed my family forever I'm talking to you because my dad made that decision and I've always been so proud of my dad for that
Starting point is 01:06:15 but this is just two weeks ago 3.15 in the morning I wake up I'm crying and I wake Kristiana up I go babe someone helped a dad And she went, what, honey? I said, someone helped dad. She said, what do you mean? I said, babe, I never thought about this.
Starting point is 01:06:32 And my dad's darkest, worst moment of his life. And some coffee shop or some room somewhere, some precious soul helped my dad. Reached out to him, talked to him, and got him sober. Wow. And I said, babe, that's not the powerful part. And I have no idea who this person is, but I wonder if they know the difference they made in Max and Bella's,
Starting point is 01:06:52 my children's lives, or your life, or the millions of people I've helped. That one decision they made. And she goes, oh my gosh. I said, I never thought about this beautiful human being. Always gave the credit to my dad, but some stranger helped him. And I said, babe, this is the bananas part. Do you know what qualified them to help my dad?
Starting point is 01:07:11 They're messed up life. Wow. They were an alcoholic. They were a drug addict. Little did that person know. The things they were the most ashamed of, the biggest mistakes of their lives. When they were using drugs and drinking and stealing it, that was qualified.
Starting point is 01:07:25 and to change my dad's life. And all of us, we run around carrying these bags of, I'm not qualified because I made this mistake. I had this bankruptcy. This relationship didn't work. I did this thing you don't know about. I'm so ashamed of. That's why you're qualified.
Starting point is 01:07:37 That's the thing that qualifies you. The humanness in you. You are the only human being with your combination of gifts that you were given, whatever they are, and your experience. And real human beings help real human beings by being vulnerable and transparent saying, I know where you are, I've messed up worse.
Starting point is 01:07:57 I've made greater mistakes. I felt more, I know that depression, I know that anxiety, I know that shame, I know what that feels like. That beautiful soul who was a drug addict and alcoholic, they didn't know all those mistakes they're making were leading them out of their heart. And they finally got to a point where their intention was to help my father. In the lowest moment of his life, they changed my dad's life. And they changed mine and maybe me and you were changing a few.
Starting point is 01:08:24 today because of that person's mess. It's crazy. Is that crazy? That's amazing. I know. I know. Love them and thank them. That's amazing, man. Before we start the interview with my next guest, just want to remind you all that you can
Starting point is 01:08:37 subscribe to the show on YouTube or follow the show on Apple or Spotify. We have all the links in our show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. Now on with the show. Each of you, you and I included, we were born to do something great with our life. We were born to do something great with our life. And it's important to check in from time to time of what that current great thing is. And sometimes we think it's the big things.
Starting point is 01:09:03 It's the people that are on both our shows. They've made this big movie. They've got this big song. They're this big thing. Who's greater? The man who helped my dad get sober? Or the fact that maybe I've helped some people because my dad got sober? That one act was greatness in his life, that kind moment with another person that says,
Starting point is 01:09:21 I can help you. Let me connect with you. And so don't discount your own greatness, your own call to do something great. And it doesn't have to be a script or a play or a book or a speech or on social media. It's just doing something great. And you matter. I don't mean this hokey. I'm telling you the truth about you.
Starting point is 01:09:41 You matter. You were born to do something awesome with your life. Your family is supposed to do something great as a family. And maybe it's just checking in and reminding yourself of that. and then asking yourself, what is that thing right now in my life? And so I just think that reminder is so important that, you know, it's great to voyeuristically look in on successful people or what we think are successful people.
Starting point is 01:10:07 It's also important of the camera turn back on you and go, you matter, you matter, you are great. And that's probably the most important thing we'd say today. Oh, gosh, man. Yeah. And, you know, one thing you just clarified beautifully is that great doesn't have to be big and big doesn't mean great right and I think we're so obsessed today we are in that to do something great it has to be big it has to be bold you know when I think about myself honestly Ed
Starting point is 01:10:36 and I can say this to you because I think I think in these sessions and when we spent time together you've heard my heart I was one of those people who actually never believed I could do any of this stuff I've done I never set out when I started and I was like oh one day I'm going to be I I didn't have any of that. That's not how I'm wired. I was wired in like, I want to serve. I want to serve whoever comes. Whether it's five people, 10 people, I'm happy.
Starting point is 01:11:02 I'll serve them. And as I started to do that, I got more confidence. Like, okay, now I want to serve larger groups. Okay, let me serve them. And then it was like, and I never believed at any point that there were these arbitrary abstract goals of like number one this. Like, those weren't how I set out. And so when I'm listening to you speak,
Starting point is 01:11:22 I hope someone's out there thinking, Jay, I'm like, Jay and Ed, I'm like you guys where it's like, I don't vibe with all that like motivation. It's like I just vibe with the fact that I want to have a great impact like the person that helped your father. Yeah. And you know what we've both found in our life too? Just to give you insight from someone called me seasoned today. You know this? Is that, you know, the universe or God really prepares you to step into the next room when you step in with some faith. And so maybe it does start with five or six people. And maybe that's enough. But perhaps in that space you're in, there'll be a little door open. And if you step into that one, you'll find, I think we think, I have to have it all figured out.
Starting point is 01:12:04 Wozniak's a good buddy of mine who started Apple. They didn't. They were a board company. They didn't only be doing this someday. They stepped into the next space. And one thing I think we also want is an immediate result. And I talk about this in the book. Maybe it would be the last little thing I'll share with you.
Starting point is 01:12:19 But I went to a birthday party as I was writing the book, and it was for a young boy. And they had a pinata. We've all been to a, especially living in California, you have the pinata. And so what they did is they took each of these little guys, they blindfolded them and spun them around, and they're all dizzy, and they're swinging, and they're not even near the pinata. That's life. A lot of times you feel like, man, I'm blind. I don't even know where I'm swinging right now, but I'm swinging.
Starting point is 01:12:42 And so each kid hit the pinata, and the candy didn't come out. And so they take the blindfold off. That kid got tired. The next little boy came up, spun him around. So like seven of him hit this pinata. No candy came out. The last boy, the smallest boy, the youngest boy there, they fill the blindfold on him.
Starting point is 01:12:59 They spin him around. He's swinging too. That's life. You just sort of swinging, right? They finally point him at the pinata. He hits the pinata just once. Bam, all the candy comes in. And all the kids jump on and celebrate.
Starting point is 01:13:12 And I'm watching that, and I'm going, now who broke the pinata? Was it the last shot or was it the cumulative blows of each of the shots on the pinata? Well, we all know the answer. It was the cumulative shots. Life's a lot like that, man, that we're taking shots, but we don't see any physical progress. But every one more we're doing is compound pounding progress. And in life, you have to be willing to buy into what is invisible progress.
Starting point is 01:13:40 Most people quit on their dream, quit on their vision before the candy comes out. and what you and I didn't do is quit. We just kept swinging. And eventually the candy comes out. The candy could be your bliss, your joy, your financial success, your notoriety, your contribution. But most people are hitting the pinata of their life and there's no evidence it's working. But the truth is, there's a compound pounding effect in life that if you keep hitting
Starting point is 01:14:07 your life's pinata, if you'll stick around, there'll be some candy come out. That was a great conversation. Be sure to follow the Ed My Let's show. on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. One of the things I want to wrap up on, Ed, and it's the power of one more you talk about it,
Starting point is 01:14:25 is just every person has the potential to be the one. Yeah. And I didn't call it that, but if you meet my family, they will definitely say, like, Dan went first. And then people always say, well, we're your brothers and sisters in trouble growing up? Yeah, but it seemed like once I got my life together and I changed the energy that everybody just kind of came with us.
Starting point is 01:14:53 And like, how beautiful is it? And this is a thing I want to acknowledge is the moment you realized that there was a one for your dad. Your dad was an alcoholic and somebody showed up and was that for him. And it shifted his life and your life and my life because I'm here with you. Yeah, so thank you for asking that. I wrote The Power One More, and I, a lot of it has to do with my dad, and, you know, one more was my dad got sober one more time, and then when he stayed sober one day at a time.
Starting point is 01:15:29 It's interesting because that's a little bit of the book, but the rest of it's like really detailed stuff, as you know. But after I wrote it, it was about six months after I wrote it, it was out, actually. Woke up right down the bedroom, right bowl, where we're sitting right now. Yeah, in this house. I was really, I was crying. And Christiana woke up, she was, what's wrong? And I said, babe, I was kind of gasping.
Starting point is 01:15:50 And I'm like, someone helped daddy. And she's like, what? And I go, someone helped daddy. And she goes, what do you mean? I go, someone helped my dad get sober. Why in the world this never occurred to me before? But in my dad's program, someone helps you. And she goes, oh my gosh, he said, this person has no idea.
Starting point is 01:16:06 I'm my dad's son. So the ripple effect, they did something great with their life. They helped my dad. In the darkest, lowest moment of my father, my father may be taking his own. life. Certainly was going to lose his family, certainly losing his career, but maybe his life, and my dad's lowest moment of his life, some precious human being stepped forward and said, I see you. I see you. I can help you. Let me tell you about you. And they changed and saved my dad's life. That person has no idea that because they help my dad, I'm his son, I've reached
Starting point is 01:16:38 millions of people. They have no idea the ripple effect of that one act of kindness, that one act of My intention is to serve you. Now, that's incredible. My life goes, oh my gosh. I said, that's not even the most amazing thing. The most amazing thing is, what qualified this person to help my dad? What qualified this person to help my dad is the very thing most of us think disqualifies us from ever being successful. It was the things that human being was most ashamed of, most embarrassed by.
Starting point is 01:17:08 You know what qualified them? They were also a drunk at one time. They were also a drug addict. They were also a liar. They were also living in the shadows. They were also ashamed at one time in their life. And because of that, the thing that they thought disqualified them was the very thing that was qualifying them to change my dad's life and be the one in my dad's life. In our lives, we are constantly stacking things that we think disqualifies.
Starting point is 01:17:33 My bankruptcy, my business failure, this sin of mine, this thing I cheated on, this mistake I made. Maybe it's none of that. I've just always been invisible and average and ordinary, so I'm disqualified going forward from not being. And we stack these things and believe we're disqualified. Nothing could be further from the truth. You are most qualified to help the person or people you used to be. You used to be. And in my dad's case, right, that guy used to be a drunk. That dude used to be an alcoholic. That person used to be a liar and a drug addict. That's what qualified them. So they could look at my dad and go, let me tell you about you. I know. I know who you are. I'm also that person. and I changed. And that's also why it's so important in life to continue to grow and change because every time you evolve into the next version of you, you're more qualified to help the people you used to be. And so you're not disqualified from being successful. You're not disqualified from being the one. In fact, probably the things that you think are the disqualifiers are the very things God would prefer to use to help you change other people's lives and ultimately your own. Even that mistake I made with my family, that family that I didn't know, I could have easily lived. the rest of my life going, man, I'm disqualified. I didn't help that family. That's not the case. The case is I'm immensely qualified because I made that mistake to never do it again and to help
Starting point is 01:18:50 all these other families. Do you know how many families I told? I'm not leaving here tonight because let me tell you about this mistake I made once and I'm not making it tonight with your family. And how many of them were persuaded by that story to then participate? So the thing I thought disqualified me actually qualified me most to help the rest of the families. It's true That was powerful Because I think most people Wouldn't have connected the
Starting point is 01:19:16 Shame The area of life That they feel less than deficit As the The tool that they should be using To go serve the world If you're faith-based And if you're not
Starting point is 01:19:26 That's okay everybody listening But if you're faith-based If I'm the adversary And I want to get you to quit on your dream There's one weapon I'm going to use against you Discouragement I'm going to get you discouraged And believe you're disqualified
Starting point is 01:19:37 Because if I can get you to believe that you have no chance and most people are walking around discouraged thinking they're disqualified and they're actually hanging that lie onto the very thing that is probably their qualifier that's the irony it's like if you really in politics right now what you do in politics if you want to win you accuse the other party of the very thing you do and you do it before they can accuse you and so in life what we do the adversary does is he gets us to accuse us with the things that are the very thing that would be the key to get us to go change our life uses it a weapon against us
Starting point is 01:20:08 And so don't let anybody do that to you. That's beautiful. Very short intermission here, folks. I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far. Don't forget to follow the show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. Now on to our next guest. Now, how do you, so one, I hope that people actually listen to you because people do
Starting point is 01:20:25 discount themselves. They do things or have things happen to them that they're not proud of that they think to find who they are and they never allow themselves to bring something beautiful to the world again, which is an absolute tragedy. So if the one is bringing this new way of thinking, if the person that thinks they are the most disqualified is able to channel that and make somebody's life better, how do they turn that into something concrete that they can articulate? How do they turn it into a habit? What is that process of going from Neo waking up and realizing that he can do something to actually dodging bullets? I think one of the things is the way that we approach time.
Starting point is 01:21:06 This is something that almost no one talks about anymore. So I feel like you may be behind. You may actually be behind your destiny right now. Like maybe you're not on pace. In fact, I think most people watching this, listening will say, I am behind on achieving my destiny. I'm not exactly sure what it is, but I feel like it's slipping. I feel like I'm behind.
Starting point is 01:21:26 So you better figure out time differently. And you can bend and manipulate time to your advantage. the most stupid, antiquated, ridiculous concept on planet Earth today very, very well may be that a day is 24 hours. It's so stupid. It's the dumbest thing ever. 24-hour days were contrived when there were no cars. There was no electricity.
Starting point is 01:21:48 If I wanted to get you a message, I had to write something down if I could. Send it on a horseback. Hope you get it. That's insane. Never mind the Internet. So what used to take hours, days, weeks, months, years to do can be done now in a millisecond. in the internet or on our smartphones,
Starting point is 01:22:02 yet we measure the time the same way that guy did? That's bananas. That is so stupid, yet everybody does it. And so I, about 25 years ago, went, I'm not the most talented. I'm not the smartest. And I'm really not. And you've had guests on your show with IQs
Starting point is 01:22:16 maybe 100 points higher than mine. This is the truth. I know a couple of them. I had them on my show. How in the world, I don't come from, you know, a whole track record of success, right? I don't have the perfect upbringing.
Starting point is 01:22:28 How in the world am I going to win? I got to do things. other people aren't willing to do, which I'm doing, that's the one more's, and I got to fix the way I look at time. What would I need to believe about time? What would I need to believe? What would the question be? And so my days now are from 6 a.m. to noon. That's a day. It's six hours. And in that day, some days you just chill. But in that day, I'm going to get the amount of productivity, faith, working out, fitness, money, business, you name it, in that day. We've all had a morning where we go, I got more done this morning than weeks. Well, why can't you do that
Starting point is 01:22:56 every morning? So I measure time. I've compressed and condensed time. I've bent it. My day, is 6 a.m. to noon and I'm not crazy. You're crazy for thinking it takes 24 hours just like some dude in a cave did 300 years ago. That's bananas that you still think that way and it's unfair that people have taught you this. My second day starts at noon and goes till 6 p.m. That's day two. But with the cool thing is at the end of day one, this clock goes off about noon every day, bro, and goes, what did I just get done? What didn't I do? What do I need to be accountable for? What do I need to double my efforts? Just like you do at the end of most days, right? And then the next day is 6 p.m. to midnight. And some of those are just fun days.
Starting point is 01:23:30 Some days I chill, right? But some days they're really super productive. What I've done now is I have changed a manipulated time. I now get 21 days a week. Stack that up over a month, I'm going to kick your butt. Stack it up over a year, you're toast. Stack it up over five years, my entire life is different than it would have been otherwise.
Starting point is 01:23:44 And if you do this for about 90 of your traditional days that you think are, you will come back to me and go, that profoundly impacted my life. And here's the other thing that happens. The world responds to you differently when you value your time like that. What is precious is valuable. That's why a diamond or this watch is way more expensive
Starting point is 01:24:02 than the piece of paper that's written down there because it's more scarce. When you interact with the world is slightly more scarce, they respond to you as if you're more valuable. So you get more accountability, more productivity, more fun, more joy, and the world flips its response to you. All of a sudden you become more valuable
Starting point is 01:24:19 and precious to people when your time is different. And you'll get thousands more days in your life and live a much more blissful and happy life then the person only gets 24 hours. Yeah, so this is a concept that I really hope people take seriously. So I'm often asked like how frequently I evaluate my progress. And I'm like, that's probably about every three hours. And I think people are surprised to hear that it's not daily, it's not weekly,
Starting point is 01:24:44 certainly not monthly or yearly. It's like I'm constantly, okay, was I productive in this period of time? Yes. In the book, you reference it, if I remember correctly, is like squeezing the air out of all those gaps of where most people like, okay, if I get this done in my day, then I'm fine. And if you took that and made your day those six hours, suddenly it's like, okay, I need to be really efficient. What if you took that day, Tom, and then combined it with the power of doing one more, that mindset, and then chasing inconvenient things on top of it in those days. And on top of that, sprinkled a little self-love to make sure that you don't burn out. Little self-love, little reticular activating system where we're doing repeated visualizations, where we're finding the things in those days that we need to be able to find.
Starting point is 01:25:23 Uh-oh. You may just change your line. You know, I know exactly what happens. And you liken this to Kobe Bryant and walk people through like, so what Tim Grover has said about like his work ethic and extra practices and stuff because it's like, I don't know how many times the successful people have to say the same things for people to get like, oh, okay, cool, I get where this is going. You know, one really simple thing is this, you need to get in a bigger hurry. If I could just distill it down to something simple, you need to get in a bigger hurry.
Starting point is 01:25:52 You're too casual, you're too slow, you walk too slow, you talk too slow, you You think in terms of too much time. And if you would just speed up the pace, man. Like, you know this when you're around someone like Kobe or Grover or you or anyone that kind of vibrates at a frequency that feels like success energy, it's faster. They don't have to talk faster. Many of our most favorite people talk much slower than you and I do. But they're just in a little bit of a bigger hurry.
Starting point is 01:26:15 I'll give you a Kobe thing that's not in the book, though, that just for me and you and everyone gets to listen. Kobe was scheduled to do my show six days after he passed. Oh, God. God. And deeper than that, I was with Kobe the week before he passed away. Let me tell you the story about this because I think it's pretty profound about the one more's. In a volleyball tournament, our daughters played volleyball together.
Starting point is 01:26:40 And if you have a kid who plays volleyball, you all are going, yep, I get what that is. These are long days and noisy days. So this thing starts about 8 a.m., all the dads are there. The last match was 10 p.m. Oh, God. Yeah, dude. And I'm the last dad in there except this other guy in a black sweatsuit with white stripes on it. And he's about 6-6.
Starting point is 01:27:03 And it's Kobe. And we've been around each other many times at these tournaments where the last of the two dads left. And so the tournament ends. His match was on a different end of the court than my daughters was. Something happened. I have no idea why I did this brother. I watched him this day. And I was on the other end.
Starting point is 01:27:20 And I watched him. He had his baby and his left arm, his little one. and he was rubbing the back of his daughter that was playing. And literally I went, I don't hug Bella enough. How affectionate he is. It just stood out to me. And because it stood out to me, his outward affection, I watched him, bro. And I watched Kobe walk out of the gym that day with this baby and his arm around his other one.
Starting point is 01:27:45 And I watched him walk out. And he obviously stood out because he was so tall. And I can picture him right now, Tom, walking out of that door for the last time. Six days later he died. And I wonder, see, if you want to know the power of one more, it's when I take it from you and you can't have it anymore. I wonder if someone would have whispered, Kobe, when he got in the car the day.
Starting point is 01:28:07 Six more days. How would that week maybe have been different for him? What would he have said? Who would he have loved? Who would he have reached out to? What would have mattered to him? About the Saturday before. Kobe, one more day.
Starting point is 01:28:22 He's getting on that helicopter. See, it hits us when I say that. And there's a whisper happening that you can't hear. 18 more, whatever it is. There's a whisper. We forget, we're going to die. Napoleon Hill says, begin with the end in mind. What if you do that with your life?
Starting point is 01:28:50 What if you began with the end of your life in mind and worked it backwards? Bro, my favorite thing in the world was to golf with my dad. My favorite thing, man, we both know good at golf. Pose my hero in a golf cart with me for five hours a foot away. And the conversations. Watch my dad walk a car. Do you know what I would do, bro, for one more round of golf with my dad? One more time.
Starting point is 01:29:15 Hey, dad, good put. Yeah, that was a good one. Wasn't it? He put his arm on me. High five. You know what I would do for that? How would you act if you started to think about all the elements of your life, like Kobe's last six days.
Starting point is 01:29:31 Kobe's one more day. Kobe's one more hour. Me getting that back with my dad. What if you started to look at the relationships you have in your life like it was the last time you had the conversation with him? The last time you get to hold Lisa's hand and look in her eyes.
Starting point is 01:29:44 But how much more precious does she become? Maybe it's the last podcast, the last interview. How much more precious would it be? How much more engaged as we are? That next meeting. That conversation with, is it Gerson over here? The conversation with him, man. See, when we begin to distill downs and we realize, yeah, there's a power to one more
Starting point is 01:30:04 because they're not promised how many we have. And so that day with Kobe just, it just burned it into my soul, man, when I watched him. And then to see six days later he was gone. That time with his family was so precious. And so I would just challenge everybody. If you want to know the power of one more, it's when I take it from you. And there's a power and there's a blessing that you get one more in your life. You're going to get another chance to talk to Lisa.
Starting point is 01:30:28 you're going to get another great dinner with her. You're going to get another show. Those listeners have another day to change their life. They have another opportunity to do one more. They have another opportunity to make their family proud of them. They still have more time. They don't just have one more day probably to be the one in their family. Life is beautiful.
Starting point is 01:30:45 It's precious. And sometimes we only have an appreciation for it in its absence. Sometimes we only have an appreciation for the power of the one mores or the people in our lives when we imagine their absence. and so I would just ask everybody to consider it. Hey y'all, it's Kelly Clarkson with Wayfair. Ever order furniture online and wonder, what if? Like, what if it doesn't hold up?
Starting point is 01:31:25 That sofa was four days old. You should have ordered from Wayfair. With Wayfair, there's no what if. Just style you love and quality you can trust. Visit Wayfair.ca. Wayfair, every style, every home.

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