THE ED MYLETT SHOW - The Art of Living with Matthew McConaughey and Rob Drydek

Episode Date: July 6, 2024

Unlock the secrets to living an extraordinary life with insights from two legends! In this powerhouse episode, I sit down with the incredible Matthew McConaughey and the unstoppable Rob Dyrdek to delve into the art of living a fulfilling and successful life. We're breaking down the walls of conventional thinking and exploring the mindset shifts that can transform your reality. Here’s what you’ll take away from this epic conversation: Matthew McConaughey’s “Science of Satisfaction”: Learn how engineered habits and consistent choices can lead to more joy and success. Matthew reveals his personal journey and the habits that have led him to catch more green lights in life. Rob Dyrdek’s Perspective on Process and Presence: Discover how focusing on the process and staying present can elevate your achievements. Rob shares profound insights on why separating from outcomes and societal validation can lead to a more fulfilling life. Practical Tools for Personal Development: Both Matthew and Rob provide actionable tools and techniques to apply in your own life. From understanding the power of consistency to mastering the art of living, this episode is packed with wisdom you can implement immediately. Get ready to revolutionize your approach to life and unleash your potential. This episode is not just about success—it's about enjoying the journey and finding joy in the process. Tune in and transform your life with the collective wisdom of these extraordinary individuals. This is one conversation you don’t want to miss! Links youtube.com/@EdMylettShow open.spotify.com/show/19TdDBlFkqh7uevYO0jFSW apple.co/edmylettshow instagram.com/EdMylett facebook.com/EdMylettFanPage x.com/EdMylett linkedin.com/in/edmylett Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

So hey guys, are you frustrated with where you're at right now? Maybe stunted in your progress? Well, if you are, I want to recommend a place for you to go called Growthday. Growthday.com forward slash ed. It is the number one personal development app on the planet. It's got all kinds of high performance techniques in there, courses, accountability, journaling, live speeches from some of the top influencers in the world, including me. It's an overall environment to change your life growthday.com forward slash ed the wait is over Dell Technologies Black Friday and July deals are live check out incredible savings on select laptops and more like the XPS 15 powered by Intel core processors the XPS 15 brings you the perfect balance of power and

portability plus stellar visuals and immersive sound. When you shop online at Dell.com forward slash deals, you'll have access to exceptional tech and electronics plus free shipping on everything. Don't miss out on Black Friday and July savings at Dell.com forward slash deals. That's Dell.com forward slash deals. This is The Ed Myron Show. Hey everyone, welcome to my weekend special. I hope you enjoy the show. Hit that like button and be sure to subscribe to the YouTube channel so you never miss my show. Whether it's Tuesday, Thursday or Saturday, here's our first guest. Today's gonna be just tremendous. This is somebody that I

wanted to get to know for a long time and pick his brain. We've got a bunch of mutual friends and I'm really excited that he's taking a space into sort of beginning to share more of what he's learned in his life and the journey that he's been on, which is a freaking remarkable life journey with some of the most amazing stories I've ever heard in my life. By the way, he's also an Academy Award winner, best actor. And so if you don't know who he is, you've been living under a rock for a long time. And today we'll unlift that rock and you'll get to know him a lot better than you probably

ever have before. So Matthew McConaughey, welcome to the show, brother. Ed, my like, good to be here with you, Ed. Yeah, it's so good to have you, man. Can we get right into your brain, brother? Let's go. Let's go. So I think one of the cool things about personal development and the journey of self-awareness and whatnot is figuring out your identity.

And so in preparing for this, I'm like, some of the things you say, I've not heard ever said this way in self-help, personal development, self-improvement. And you said finding your identity, I'd like you to elaborate on this, is more like a process of elimination than it is discovery. I've never heard that before.

Well, we all wanna figure out who we are. As Bob Dylan says, hey, everyone's their own creation, just create it. We all wanna know what that is. The affirmative, way to go forward, how to play offense. But I found that, that's hard, man. That's hard. What's much easier? And I think the reasonable first step to figure out who we are is let's define who we're not. Yeah. Let's pick out those people, places, things we do, habits we have that don't pay us back that don't

feed us tomorrow that that don't that don't give us green lights in the future. Those investments that don't have ROI. Those ones that we keep waking up tomorrow and a little bit of a debit damn it, I got a hangover. I had the same amount of drinks at that bar as I have somewhere else, but I got a worse hangover. Well, maybe it was the conversation people were hanging out with. Eliminate those, and by process of elimination,

sheer mathematics, you end up with more room for the things that do feed you. So it's a much easier thing to start pointing out, ah, you know what, I keep doing that, and it doesn't pay me back. I'm not getting my compounding asset on that decision, or those people play something. Eliminate those, and by sheer mathematics,

we end up with more of what does feed us and pay us back who we are. Yeah. That's what you say that I got interviewed yesterday. That's incredible. I got every yesterday, guys, what are the steps of success? And I said to him in my life, it's been more eliminating the things that were harming my progress than it was like uncovering. This is the key.

You know, it was more like that hurt me this took my energy away this depleted me that didn't serve me exactly what you just said use the term green lights which by the way uh that's the title of his book that came out a couple years ago you should read it but if you really want to give your gifts give yourself a gift get the audio version because you get to hear this voice of his but like the impressions and the stories in the book are unbelievable but because it's gonna lead to what you're doing on April 24th and it's also leads to just really the really kind of thing the foundation of some of your belief systems in your work

what is by definition a green light? Being cool to your future self. Making choices that we can engineer green lights. And then sometimes they're mystical. We love green lights. The left lane of life. A speed limit windowed down, feet top open, cruising. We got our direction in a full tank of gas. Let's roll.

We love them. We're in the right line at the supermarket. We're in the flow as it's called. Flow. Right? Things are working out. Sometimes we're not even conscious of it. We were just in line and on time. Yes is the answer and we're choosing the right things. Yeah. But it's investments that we make, choices we make. I noticed and write in the book that

a lot of successes I had were engineered by habits and choices I made that had consistency. That's what I call a science to satisfaction. I believe there is a science to satisfaction. I noticed what I was eating, who I was hanging out with when I was going to bed, how I was approaching the day. There were consistencies that led to times in my life where I had more joy and more success and was catching more green lights. I also noticed times where I was in a rut

through my journals of, oh, you veered from these tried and true habits that you had that were leading to success and giving you more green lights. Oh, let's get back in our lane over here. And sure enough, more success and green lights I started to create for myself. And sure enough, more success in green lights I started to create for myself. We also get those mystical green lights where we're just, man, there's no reason, but there's a lot of rhyme. We met the right person and damn it, if we'd have left five minutes later

or 30 seconds earlier, we might not have met them. They might not be married with the family we have now, or might not have got that job if we wouldn't have been just right there on that time crossing that person, going through that door as they were coming out. Those don't make any sense at the time, but when you look back, they connect the dots to right where we are. And that gets into more of the art of living. So that's why I call it the science of satisfaction leads to the art of living. And what we're going to do on 24th is try and get under the hood to go from the approach that I gave a lot of in Greenlights more into the process and tools

that each of us can hopefully utilize in our own lives, particularly for you or anyone who's going to tune in and say, oh, I recognize that. Oh, that's an aberration. To engineer more green lights, find that science so we can get better at the art of living. Man, I cannot wait for this event. We're going to talk a little bit about this in a minute, you guys, but just remember this, enliving.com. You just want to participate, trust me, because you don't get, you know, it's really rare. I'm so excited you've done this and decided to step in even deeper than the book for this reason. Personal development self-help a lot of times is loaded with a lot of theory. I love theory, so I've lived off a lot of these theories, but there's something powerful

when someone's applied something in their life that gives it credibility that otherwise might not have, because you can back it with a story or a fact or an anecdote. This industry is sometimes polluted to some extent with a lot of theoretical stuff that hasn't been proven in someone's real life and you've done this in your real life. One of the things you talk about with these green lights or even just having something happen that you and I are both Christians, but we also believe in energy and vibration and frequency and all that stuff. I think when you're in that flow, that green light mode, there's a vibration to you. There's an energy to you that these things are sort of drawn your way and you are in

that flow state. And there's something so profound you said in the book about the story where you're living with this producer and he basically you tell him, hey, I gotta get an agent. I gotta get an agent. So you're kind of like chasing the green light. And he said, hey man, you need it. And you paint this amazing distinction because I know it's been true in my life

between need and want and why need is not a real good space to be in. So if you would, if you tell them the story and then the lesson learned from it, it's awesome. Yeah. I get out to Hollywood with a couple thousand bucks in my pocket. I got a movie out, Days Confused, which is really the only resume I have.

It's enough to get me in a few doors, but it's not enough to be a lead pipe cinch. Oh, you got it. But I need an agent. I'm in Hollywood. I'm sleeping on this guy's couch, Don Phillips, the guy I met in a bar in Austin who gave me the chance to go audition for Daysazed and Confused over a year earlier. I'm on his couch, my money's now into the three digits, I'm below a thousand bucks,

I'm starting to get a little like, I've been there a few weeks, I'm like, hey, can you give me an agent meeting? And he snapped at me. I did! You need it too much! This industry, Hollywood smells, need your one and done, buddy. What you need to do is get the hell out of here.

Go with your buddies and go ride motorcycles somewhere. Hell, pick Europe, I don't care. But go somewhere till you quit needing it so much because if Hollywood smells you needing it, you're done. You're never in. And I did, put on a backpack with my 800 bucks and I went off with my two good buddies, Roy Cochran and Koaz, and we rode motorcycles through Europe.

I came back. I wasn't even thinking about an agent. I was what he called, now you're cool again. Now you're cool. And I was rolling along and he's about a week later after I returned. We're sitting there at dinner. He always made filet mignon and then had a scoop of Haagen-Dazs ice cream for dessert. He's since moved on. I love talking about him. And he goes, you're ready. And I go, for what? And he goes, tomorrow morning, we got a meeting, William Morris,

you're going to go down. And I was like, oh, cool. Now, five weeks earlier, if he'd said that, I'd have been like, okay, good, good, man. I got this. Okay, I need this. I would have gone into the meeting. They would have smelt my need. They would have felt my need. I would have leaned outside of myself. I would have oversold myself and probably dorked out and used too many words and not have been myself and overleveraged myself. And they'd have been like, I'm not sure this guy's really, you know, he's kind of wanted too much, needs it too much. And instead I went in, believed in myself, had a presence about me, didn't oversell myself, but really let them know, no, I actually think you need me as an agent.

And that made me a more valuable asset to them. I got an agent and then I damn it, my first two auditions in Hollywood from that agent, I got the jobs. Did you really? Yeah. See, don't you think, like I think that's a Hollywood story, but it's not. Like if you're having a hard time

finding the relationship that you want, everybody's been on that date with that person that just seems to need it a little too much. Or the salesperson, like, man, everything's good and your need to sell me is getting in the way of me buying it from you. We can smell the solicit. Yes. And nobody likes the smell. We all love a good salesman. But it's like the difference between a bullshit and a liar.

A bullshit at least kind of winks at you while they're telling the tale to let you know, hey, just go with me. And there's something adorable about that, right? Yes, yes. You see someone that needs, and this goes for my love story with my wife, Camilla. When I met her, when I saw her move across the room

that night, I had just come to a place spiritually where I was like, you know what, Matthew? Your dream is to be a father. You may not get married. You may have kids. Now something about that dream and my relationship with God, there was a grace of God saying, that's okay if that happens. So for the first time in my life, I was like.

It's not ideal, but I will be OK with that spiritually. And as soon as that happened, I went from this looking for her at every damn red light in the produce section, everybody I met, maybe, maybe I was maybe, I was hunting, I was needing, I was looking for that mate. Was it near as attractive? As soon as it came to me, like, you may not meet her. And can you be okay with that, with yourself, Matthew,

and spiritually? And soon as I was okay with that, I had a present. I was now able to receive love from somebody. I was able to see somebody and they let them see me. And that's when she showed up. That's when she came into my life. When I quit hunting. When I quit rubbernecking at every red light. Looking like maybe the car next to me. Maybe that's her. Yeah. You know, I got to tell you, it's one of those really invisible, subtle things that most people don't have any appreciation for is what he's telling you right now, everybody. I'm telling you right now, that need thing is repelling. There's some type of energy that just doesn't work.

This show is sponsored by BetterHelp, and I'm grateful that it is. I gotta tell you, you know, I get asked all the time, what's the one thing that most of the guests that have been on this show have in common. I could tell you they're all from different backgrounds. Some of them are tall, some of them are short, some of them are from the US, some of them are from abroad, different ethnic backgrounds, religious backgrounds, you name it. But I gotta tell you, most of them have been to therapy and I'm a big believer in therapy. I think that whether you've got some real trauma you got to work through in your life or you know you just got a problem you want to work on right now, maybe you just want to talk out loud about some issues you got or find a better quality of emotions

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Just want to remind you all that you can subscribe to the show on YouTube or follow the show on Apple or Spotify We have all the links in our show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way now on with the show I'm curious about you though because You're a pretty good-looking man number one and you've had some notoriety an episode that way. Now on with the show. I'm curious about you though because you're a pretty good looking man, number one, and you've had some notoriety, I don't know if you're aware of this or not, and a little bit of financial success in your life as well. And so it's interesting to me that you were looking like that when you have all the options in the world, number one. But number two, that it seems to me, brother, that family,

your marriage and your children, are such a giant priority from you. And this is something I wanted to ask you. It's really not a lot in the, there's parts of this in the book, but there's something I wanted to know about you, because a lot of times what we see in our life, we end up modeling.

So I'm reading about you and I'm like, whoa, this dude grew up in a, I'm sure he was a loving fan, but is it interesting damn family you grew up in. Am I right that your parents were married three times? Married three times, divorced twice. Did y'all just hear that right now? So it been pretty easy for you to kind of model, I assume that meant there was some chaos happening.

Oh, hell yeah. Right? So like share a little bit of that and then are you like conscious of being the antithesis of that? And because I think that's an important thing in life. Like my dad was an alcoholic, my dad got sober, my dad was an alcoholic though.

And there's a lot of chaos in my life. And I remember when I started out a family, like I want peace in our home. I want, we're gonna talk a little bit in a while about joy because I love that word you used, but I was conscious of sort of trying to create that which didn't exist in my home. Were you?

create that which didn't exist in my home? Were you? Good question. Because I don't ever remember consciously thinking I want to push away from that. And remind me to come back to this line because I want to tell you a story about my mother and why my mother was such a good mother. Okay.

She had a stepmother who was horrific. Not one bit of good mother. My mom didn't know how to be a mom. All she did is go, I want to be the opposite of that. And she became a great mom. Now I didn't consciously ever think, oh, I don't want to do it how mom and dad did. I did say, I'm not looking for that many tidal waves. I'd like a little bit smoother running stream in my relationship. My mom to this day, if you're having a civil cool conversation where all voices are nice and low and everyone's kumbaya on getting along 15 minutes of that a

board my mom and mama will throw a wrench in the situation just to hey, hey, spice it up. Huh? She's still that way and she's 91. That was her and my dad's relationship. They were physical, divorced twice, married three times. What I took from that was, Hey, guess what? Love one, three to two.

That's what I got from it. And I took from it. I don't need to get divorced and married twice for love to win. I want to get married once and let's roll with that. My mom and dad, if I have to raise my voice, I immediately have a trigger goes off in my mind, it says, Makani, what did you not handle for it to get to this point? Now, my mom and dad raised their voice

a couple of times a week. And that was just part of the conversation. It was like the stereotype of Italians. It was always big and hands and hey, big and loud. And that's just how they communicated. And my mom to this day would say, no, that's what I needed to communicate. There were no regrets.

So we never had a question if we were loved. I never had a question if a mom loved my dad, my dad loved my mom. I did say I'm not looking for that rocky of a road. I'd rather not. Unfortunately, Camilla was someone who was not looking for that either. And little known fact,

Camilla's parents, my wife now, were married twice, divorced three times. Come on, man. They ended up on the divorce side. What are the odds of that, though? Couples usually don't get married more than one time. In one marriage between the two of you, there's four? Five marriages and five divorces.

The same married couple, that's bananas. That is literally bananas. What did you, you wanted to say something about your mom being a good mom. You wanted to make sure you made a reference to that. Well, that was it, that she learned, you know, we, again, process of elimination, what we started off talking about. It's not always what you go to, affirmatively, and play offense. There's a lot of times, what we started off talking about. It's not always what you go to affirmatively

and play offense. There's a lot of times what are we pushing against in defense to get our identity. My mom eliminated, well, I don't know how to be a mom, but I know I wanna be the opposite of that lady who raised me is what she said, who was a non-grata mom. And so to this day, my mom didn't know what to do. She just said, I'm doing the opposite

of how her mom treated her. And that turned out to be being a great mom. You think that, you know, I was reading your stuff and I'm like, because I talk a lot about happiness. In fact, my podcast is out today is about happiness. This Harvard study, longest study in the history of mankind, 85 year study. They took a thousand privileged kids from Harvard University, a thousand young boys,

same age from South Boston, underprivileged families, and they studied them for 85 years. A fascinating study about who ended up happier and who lived longer and whose wellbeing and what made them happy. Actually, one of the kids in the study was JFK. No joke. It's an amazing, amazing study. It's worth listening to. However, it's around happiness. And you make this distinction. This is why your work, it's really unique. You make this distinction between joy and happiness.

And I have never heard this before in my life. To me, they've sort of been very similar things, but you correlate happiness almost to like, we get happiness if we've done something, whereas joy can be present in any... talk about that for a second. This is awesome. So happiness, as most of us are taught, or as most of us see it, myself included, is result oriented. If then, if I get this, then I will be happy. If I reach this goal, then I will be happy. It's almost like a tada moment. If I get enlightened and spiritually, then I will be ah, namaste, whatever it is. And over and over in my own life and from other mentors and wise men and women in the world, there's no tada moment. There's no hill that you get to the top of and you go, ah, finally I did it. Because what do you see on once you get to the top?

That thousand other hills or another one that's taller that you're like, oh, so you immediately upgrade your iOS of happiness and you project it into the future again for another hill to climb. So it's a moving target that you're constantly chasing. Now I'm all for the chase and the setting of goals to go reach and the writing of headlines early to tell your story towards that.

But what I've noticed is joy is more the verb. Joy is the doing of what we're fashioned to do and enjoying the process of the doing. And if we can get out of our mind that there is a finish line and just enjoy the race, chase ourselves in this race and go, the best we can do is get to the end of this life and say, look back and go, well, I didn't make it to the top, but how many stairs did I ascend? Or how wide did my stairs reach?

Or how deep did my roots grow? Just tally it up. Hopefully we're in the black, Hopefully we're in the asset. And if there's life after this, hopefully the prime mover is going, well done. But I mean, I think this is as good as it gets. It's my problem with extra credit today. 4.2 GPAs and participation trophies. No, 100, the top is as good as it gets. There's no such thing as 110%. Maybe we ought to bring back Ds in school. You know what I mean?

It's like- You're right. Like if we can make a B plus in this life, that's damn good. Or if we can get, but we're never gonna make, we're never gonna get perfection. We're never gonna reach 100. We're never gonna reach a hundred. We're never gonna reach the top of that staircase.

And that is what we call happiness that we keep bumping forward. But if we can enjoy the process along the way, I find that you don't reach lower levels than if you just chased happiness. You actually reach the same levels or more and you had a pretty damn good time on the way. So true.

I gotta tell you, man, that is wisdom. I think I figured out a version of that, but I wasn't, I'm 52 next month. I didn't, it took me till my 40s. And I'm like, wow, this finish line keeps freaking moving. It keeps moving. Like, no, once I've got this or once I got a jet or I'm living at the, this finish line keeps freaking moving. It keeps moving. Like, no, once I've got this, or once I got a jet, or I'm living at the beach, or I've got this award,

or this many people know me, and it kept moving. And I'm like, this is insane. And to your point, when I started to give myself the gift, I thought, man, if I don't keep moving the finish line, I'm gonna lose my drive. So this thing, even though it hasn't brought me a lot of bliss in my life, it sure keeps me driven and hungry.

And if I let go of this finish line mentality, if when I get their thing, I'll lose my drive and ambition. And to your point, I couldn't have been more wrong because when I started to give myself the gift of joy in my home, in my life, in my emotions on a daily basis. I actually found I had more energy to pursue the achievements that I want in my life. And I wasn't so damn tired every time I finally got to one of these artificial finish lines. Amen.

And you know, I hear you on your forties. Forties were a great customizing decade for me too, where I actually learned to trust. Hey buddy, if you, if you quit pursuing that actual result, you're not gonna lose your work ethic, you're not gonna lose your drive, you're not gonna lose your want to, it's just gonna be more natural through the day, it'll actually be more instinctual.

And as you say, you don't reach it and go, you gotta get up there and you're kinda going, oh, is this it? It's the old, what's the best round of golf you play? Say you're 10 handicap and you're five over on 16 tee box. You're going to shoot a better round if you don't look at the scorecard. It's so true. You're walking off of 18 green, heading towards the next tee box,

and someone has to remind you, no dude, round's over. You know, I found it in my career. When I started, I had a little six year run there. And even with Dallas Buyers Club, I was not chasing result. I was like, F the results, man. I'm on my heads down in the process and let the results be, I got more results

when I quit chasing result. I didn't lose my drive. I worked as hard. I worked definitely worked smarter. There's a great example in that Jared Leto who won Academy for best sporting actor in that. Guess when he and I met with rap of shooting on the set the last day. That's a rap. rap of shooting on the set the last day. That's a rap. We were, he was the character. I was Ron, he was Rayon. We said hello as Ron and Rayon when we met two weeks

before we started filming. We filmed for five weeks. All of a sudden they reeled rap that night. And he and I looked at the idea and said, okay, see you tomorrow. And they do like, no, no, no, that's a film rap. There is no tomorrow. Wow.

And I stopped and looked over and Jared stopped and looked at me and I walked up and I went McConaughey and he goes, Jared, nice to meet you. Come on. Just head down in the process. So not only are you separating from what the outcome is, you separate from a lot of different things. That is bananas. You, so you separate from outcome and kind of like, given a crap about what they think also, like, like that's a really hard thing for most

people in our culture today where everything is supposed to be validated. Did this post get a light? Did it not get a light? Did it, you know, this obsession almost with what people are thinking about. I actually think the result obsession is a what people think about me obsession. Like I worked with some PGA guys and their fear of missing a putt.

And I'm like, you're not really afraid of missing the putt. You're not even afraid of losing the tournament. You're actually afraid of what people are gonna think about the fact that you missed this putt that you're supposed to be making. This obsession with what are they to think about the fact that you missed this putt that you're supposed to be making. This obsession with what are they going to think, I think also causes us to hyper focus on the result because we want them to think good things about us. Society has us living in the third person. We're all running, we're pulling Leon Letts in the Super Bowl. We're returning the kickoff for a touchdown,

looking at the Jumbotron at the 50, wondering if we're going to make it on SportsCenter at best place. And that's just when we get tackled from behind, when we quit behaving and just be doing the behavior of the process and taking the action that we're doing. When I'm doing it, and I think when most people are doing it and in the joy of the process and head down, it's a vacation. Because it's solely subjective. It is, I'm on an island. It is literally a vacation to have a singular obsession when you're doing that thing. Now, I understand it's a privilege. I have a wife who, I go out to go out the door every day to work, she tells me, I got the kids don't look over your shoulder, go kick ass. That's a privilege. I get I understand that. But when we're taking an action, we have to do it, or to do it with pleasure and enjoy and stay in the present of the action.

It's the again, it's the the joy is if you bump the finish line almost to an unreachable place. If you bump it, you know, Bo Jackson didn't just run across the goal line. He ran across the goal line and through the tunnel. I mean, snipers don't aim at the target, they aim on the other side. Therefore, you never choke when you're on the goal line, so to speak, because you're like, no, the finish line way down there. And all of of a sudden someone has to tell you, no, you crossed the goal line. You scored. You're like, Oh, I did. I was going to, I thought we had to go another 40 yards.

Now you're onto something right there, brother. That's that whole concept that when they wrapped shooting, you're like, we're wrapped, right? I'm coming back tomorrow. Yeah. I got to tell you, I think what it gives you maybe is freedom. I think there's a free, it's a freedom when you're totally immersed in a process and not so concerned about results or outcomes, you maybe is freedom. I think there's a freedom when you're totally emerged in a process and not so concerned about results or outcomes.

It creates a freedom and then that science, you can actually navigate in an art form when you're in it. I think that allows the art to sort of take over the energy that whatever it is, when you're totally free. Embrace the summer vibes with Summersby Hard Cider, bursting with lovely aromas of apple. This light-bodied fruity cider offers a crisp, clean finish, perfect for sunny days and warm nights.

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the Ed Mylett show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. Here's an excerpt I did with our next guest. I have a really good friend here today. One of the most downloaded shows we've ever done before because he'll surprise you. You know him from television. He's an incredible television personality with ridiculousness and a million other projects that he's done. But I don't know him from that. I know him from his brilliance as an entrepreneur and as a human optimizer of himself, of time and in everything connected to him and he's a very very good friend of mine and I love my conversations with him he's one of my

favorite people I've ever met in my life to talk with if not my favorite and I thought today I just let you sit in on one with us we're gonna talk today with the great Rob Dyrdek welcome to the show brother hey thank you for having me it's nice to go from Laguna is a beautiful place to do a show, but it's nice to come to Hollywood into the fancy studio as well. This is more your like comfort level, isn't it? Like this Hollywood thing. So you were saying to me. No, it's not. I stay away from this area of the city.

You know what I'm saying? When I'm driving over here, I'm like, man, I've been here forever. Look at this place. I think that when it certainly has changed over the years and it hasn't improved, but that's probably a whole other conversation. Um, you were saying before we started though, it was four years ago that we did our show and that at the time when we were doing the show, there were a lot of theoretical things that you talked about on that show that

you believed in, that you were implementing into your life. And now you're like, now I have some data to really validate some of the stuff that I believe in. So what are some of those things that, like you said on the show, and you're like, and now I'm seeing in real life the results from those things? Yeah. You know, I think the most profound one

was really about sort of what I really discovered and talked a lot about in 2018 we did the show was that life is about this pursuit of the ideal version of yourself. Right? And this has been something you've talked about forever, where it's this idea of, you know, putting out into the future what you want to become and then building a plan and strategy and put in all the energy and effort to go and achieve it.

Right? And you will grow into that person over time. And so that pursuit we talked a lot about as being really important. And, and I was talking a lot about it from the business lens and, and doing it from a balanced perspective. And what happened for me in that conversation is it led to what happens when you reach that person. And I made the comment of I think like when you eventually get to the ideal

version of yourself that you sort of settle in to sort of a rhythm and you and your pursuit wouldn't quite be the same. And within four years, I achieved all of the goals that I set in 2016 and became the ideal version of myself. So I actually rather than guess that what would happen to me when I finally reached the ideal version of myself, I actually experienced it. And what was so profound for me is, since you grow into your ideal self, you're growing along the way, and as you learn more and you begin to see further,

so the ideal version of yourself is always off in the distance. And it's not about ever ending the game and that you're there. It's actually the pleasure and the actual joy that you get from living is in that pursuit. The difference was is I learned to control that pursuit and grew in a systematic, harmonious way and then grew beyond what my ideal version at that time would become because I grew into

a completely different person by the time I got there. You guys all get it now? See what I'm talking about? It took four minutes and there you get it. So that's why it's my dude to talk to. He is special. The success that he's had in his life isn't by mistake. And I'm not talking about his financial or television success, I'm talking about

kind of father he is, kind of friend he is, kind of husband he is. None of this is by mistake. In my life I have some really brilliant entrepreneur friends and I have some really brilliant personal development friends. I don't know anybody with the combination of both like you. I don't. One of the things I'm learning from you, I want to go right to some of your stuff. I'm a work lots of hours guy. I'm a pound it. Let's go grind bingo. And you're like, hey, that's not exactly how it works, bro.

Hey, there's a better way. And so why don't you share with us the better way, your theory about hours and time and also the value of a minute, the value of time. Yeah, it's funny because sometimes I'll watch your stories and it's like, I don't feel like going today, but I got to get up and I got to make it happen. And I'm like, man, why are you putting yourself in a position where you don't feel like going today? You know what I mean?

Like that's... Yeah, it's fair. You know, because I almost like to look at myself. I've evolved into like a blend of sad guru, Ray Dalio, and who's the good doctor that's tapped into the quantum field are? Dispenza. Dispenza. I'm basically a combination of all three of those. Whoa.

Daliu, Dispenza, and Sadguru. Hello. That's maybe the best combo ever. Look, when I think about what's intersected through me, it's that analytical, like data-driven side of Dalio. It's the tap into the quantum field of Dispenza. And it's the, hey, the reality you experience today is based off of every action decision that you have made in the past.

That is the sad guru sort of karma concept, right? And to me, you know, if you want to have a truly rich, fulfilling life, you, you have to find joy in every part of it. And in order to do that, you have got to, to use your time with absolute intention. And so for me, it's, it's, everybody knows that. It's the only resource you got. It's the only resource that's limited, man. You're locked up. And for me... Is that your impression of me? No, that was like a middle ground for him.

You know what I'm saying? But I was halfway in it. I was halfway in it. I push you towards like a wrestler voice. You know what I mean? But when I started tracking all of my time my life changed right because it's like I I used to Design what I called the rhythm of existence, right? So I I built the rhythm of existence in 2015 which was essentially the operating system for my life

and so it had all these these principles and had all these things that I would do with my time and then I would Create a rhythm of the year like when sort of all the constants were and when the variables would happen, you know, because your life flows around weekends and holidays and birthdays. It has this cadence that you can build sort of your time around that you can get better and better at predicting how to use your time more efficiently. But boy, I started tracking all of it. I would just you know, I plan a lot of it. And then I would be highly adaptive and adjust it. But the thing that I started doing every day is just tagging every hour. And what did I do?

And I eventually found somebody in 2020 that heard me talk about it and came in and, and wrote a script that went into my Google calendar that pumped that thing out into a dashboard. And now I could see how I used my time on a weekly, monthly, yearly basis by hour and by percentage. And so that began to create this really interesting clarity as it related to like the time matrix from a percentage standpoint, right? If you have, you know, 8,760 hours in the year

and you do something for 365 days a year for one hour, it's 4% of your life, right? If you, you know, sleep seven hours, it's like, you know, 28% of your life, you know, if you work a 40 hour a week, it's 23% of your life. So I began to see the structure of this time. And as you begin to understand and design it against how you want to use it, you begin to question its efficacy, how high of efficacy are you using with this actual time? And then when you decide to do something,

you start thinking about it in second and third order consequences, right? Because we'll get excited about an idea that we wanna do. And we just think about the idea, oh, maybe we don't think about the time, energy, and mental capacity that it'll take from. And then the long tail of that, because once we commit to something, what happens? We could be trapped by it, right?

And if it ends up taking way more time, like it could end up being detrimental to your overall wellbeing and your balance in your, in your mind. Right. So for me, as I began to do all that and really look at the time matrix, I began to put value on on every bit of that time. And then I began to assess that time by how did it make me feel qualitatively. And that then began to make me continually adjust how I design the time because what I realized is what's happening, the world's changing, you're changing at all times, you're evolving everything around you is evolving so you can't just make one great

schedule and there you go you did it you have a perfect time time management skills like you're constantly need to be adjusting how you use time and the value of that time and and and how you see you should spend that on an ongoing basis or on an ad hoc basis like and you have to continually design it better and better over time. And what I did was grow the skill set of continually optimizing time and assessing it and redesigning it that allowed me to get more and more efficient so I could go from you know doing 250 episodes of Televin, doing you know 52 podcasts, managing you know you know if I have core six companies that I have to be actively managing and decided to go along with all my other pursuits and still do that with only 23% of my time.

You know what I'm saying? Like that is where you now have gotten so efficient that you choose efficiency over anything else that's- You might give them an example, cause I know it. Like for example, like when I've come to you with different things like, hey, I got this TV show idea. Like, well, how much of your time is it gonna take? How does it make you feel?

What's it gonna cost you somewhere else? You know, what percentage of it is for you? Even when we first started here, even this podcast, I'm like, it's this percentage of my time You know, what percentage of it is for you even before started here even this podcast? I'm like, it's this percentage of my time. It's this percentage of my income However, it's a big percentage of joy for me Yeah, but in your case if you don't mind and if you don't it's okay But like even the way you shoot your show, yeah, one of things when you hear this man talk He has as big a life as about anybody that I know I mean he's got a show where he shoots a bazillion episodes

He's in production side. He's in the production side. He's on the talent side. He's got the Deirdre machine. He's got his investments. He's got different businesses. He's got a core and he's got, he's a very, very active father, very, very active husband.

He's got a public persona to keep up. He's got a social media. He's got a podcast. And that's just like some of it. Yet I don't know anyone who navigates their life more seamlessly and beautifully than you do. And that's just like some of it yet. I don't know anyone who navigates their life more Seamlessly and beautifully than you do I Don't but you'd make it it wouldn't seem that way so give us a practical

Example for you like on the way that you scale time like for your show What you did in the way that you shoot it and that the gaps in between shows if that too personal or no No, you're sure that because this is because I to think, okay, that sounds really good theoretically, but I'm trying to get my startup off the ground. My kids are in soccer. I've got the gym I gotta get to. So what does that look like practically? How do I actually begin to navigate it?

Yeah, look, I think every bit of your life has the ability to be designed into time. You know what I mean? And yes, things are gonna come at you that you need to change. And then everything you wanna drive to automation, right? Everything in my life, I try to drive to automation. And then when I feel friction, I go to optimize it.

And when I feel friction, I apply a system or a solution. And I just keep doing that over and over and over to reduce all friction and drive everything to a much higher state of efficiency right and the show itself is this beautiful example of it I used to shoot 60 episodes a year and it would tear the soul out of me it would tear the soul out of me I wouldn't I didn't even want to shoot the show anymore I didn't want to shoot the show anymore because it just took too much energy. It would be five weeks straight where I would shoot like four days a week and it would just like,

I would be at the end of it. I would be so exhausted and be like, I don't even like enjoy doing this. Like I don't care what it pays me. It's like, it's too much of my energy and wellbeing, right? And so I began to just look at ways to make it more and more efficient and look at the things that bother me. Cause we used to shoot two a day and then we would shoot for an hour, do all these pickups in between. Then I would stay for an hour

and then do voiceover on the stage for an hour. And then we would break for an hour. Then do voiceover on the stage for an hour and then we would break for an hour Then I would do the whole thing again I would get there at like 9 30 10 and leave it like six Right and then that would be a five week stretch of like four days a week and just just terrorize me Then I'd have to drive out to Glendale To get prepped for the shows and spend three or four hours going through all the shows. And I just slowly kept looking at every possible thing that I could optimize.

And it started first with how they built the shows and presented them to me. And I got to instead of driving out to Glendale to look at them, hey, let's start doing it online and send them to me. And then it's like start, um, presenting them to me in this structure. And then it got to the point where I stopped even talking to them. They just would send them to me. I would review them and it went from three hours round trip to do it to 15 minutes.

This is Rob right here. You guys, this is the stuff. And, and, and to then actually shooting the show. Then then it was like how can we make it more and more efficient? All right I'm not I'm just gonna do to fire off a lot more off the cuff stuff that you can edit in instead of doing the Voiceover and then I took you know shooting the show for an hour Hour plus and then do an hour of voiceover. I drove that all the way down to about 35 minutes Then I said, hey, how do we take, can we take one clip out of every single one of these? Because we're only, we're shooting

with six clips, but we're only editing four and five. And so we took a clip out of everything, drove the time down to 29 minutes, right? And so then it became, okay, you shoot two a day, let's shoot two a day before lunch then it was like okay let's shoot three a day before lunch then it was like all right let's shoot six a day three before lunch three after and then now i could get six done in a day and then i could spread out when i shoot to where i only shoot a couple times a month. Then boy, now I feel like it's back in my life. It's back in my rhythm. It's no longer taking energy.

It's much more efficient to get prepped for it's easier to shoot. I, the energy's not gone because I'd shoot it so quickly that it, that the energy's good pop into the next one. But I just kept looking at way after all these different ways that I continue to optimize and optimize and then now going into next year, I'm going to start shooting 336. Okay. And I'm going to shoot eight a day. And so I was like, I don't want to give up any more time. Where can I save time? We have 15 minutes between the shows to change wardrobe. So if I eliminate two wardrobe changes and in between the shows

and 15 minutes at lunch, I get back that hour. And now I can shoot 336 in the same 42 days, five hours a day as I did to shoot the 252 with prep time the night before and drive time there and back. That is 4% of my life. See you guys, this is why I want them around me. Let me give you, let me interrupt you. Okay. I want to give you guys like the easy application for me. This hyper obsession with optimization of time and oneself, when you're around somebody, they become a friend of yours, some of it rubs off on you. So I don't have the types of show that he has, I

don't shoot 350 episodes, I don't have that, but it has caused me to begin to evaluate where am I just pissing time away? Where is it causing me more stress? What are the different things I do? I'll give you one small thing. That's a massive thing. After I met you, I started looking at just meetings that I take and I'm like, why are all my meetings one hour long? Why is it blocked from? Think about all of you do is you're like, that's right. Why is it from four to five o'clock? How do,

how do I know this thing's going to last an hour? And because it lasts an hour, because we've blocked an hour, we take up the hour. But perhaps this is a 20 minute meeting, right? Perhaps this is a 14 minute meeting. Why is everything four to 4 30, five 30 to six five. Why are they all these round number blocks of time that we've all accepted need to be blocks of time? And because that's the block, that's how long the meeting takes, right?

You're nodding when I say this. So I've gotten with my team now, and now they know, let's find out how long this meeting is required to happen, the most efficient time for the meeting. Not when I'm dismissive of people or don't give them the adequate amount of time or the emotional connection, but you'll find everybody, most meetings don't need to be an hour.

They don't. They don't. They don't need to be an hour They don't they don't need to be a half an hour Yeah, and so when I started to get those things done I have a lot of 15 minute meetings now, and my whole life opened up because of it And here's the other thing I bring better energy to those meetings So you're so right like when you first time like this is really good in theory, dude Because you got this big old life, but for the beginner they just gotta go Yeah, but the truth is when you're just going I want you to speak to this. So let's let's now get the guy goes That's great. I don't have 350 of anything. I don't have 64 of that. Yeah, I got a job. I've got a side hustle

I got a family. I'm trying to get this going. So I'm throwing a bunch of time at it But my thing I want you to speak to is your lack of valuing time is impacting not only your fatigue, your energy, your performance, but it's impacting every part of you because other people don't value your time or you when you don't. And when you begin to take control time, even as a beginner, my belief is other people value you more. Do you agree with that? Yeah. And look, I think the other thing is you end up creating sort of your system that also

allows you to be available a lot more than you should be. You know what I mean? And then people rely on that availability to then have a more scattered erratic schedule that you've got to be fit into. And they pull the energy from you because you're, you're essentially operating that way. And that scatteredness becomes how the people operate around you, right, which almost never allows you to get there, right. And to me, when you start

thinking about your whole life, forget about just time as because time is just one sort of piece of what you need to have high energy and have a great life and so it's if if you don't design time to meditate to free think to get to the gym to do all these things that you know you need to do that make you the better version of you and make you feel more balanced in your mind that allows you to have better energy and more clarity at that meeting and you just continually go from thing to thing to thing because oh I have to go from thing to thing to thing then you are never going to have the time to do the things that

you want to do because you're too busy doing the things you have to do on an ongoing basis as a way of life. Man. You are the machine and you design the machine to go from thing to thing to thing to thing till you're exhausted, then you complain, then you overcorrect and try to get rid of all these things to get it back when in fact it is the way that you have built your system that has bound you to this this habitual way of not having time rather than designing your whole system

around using time the right way. I think it's the most breakthrough stuff anyone's talking about right now, particularly designed for this time. I really I mean it. I think it speaks to everybody at every stage, no matter if they have a big, huge life and all the things you have going or I have going or they're beginning to build their dream life if you don't get intentional about this That's the micro but let me say this to that. Yeah, right. Everybody's got a big life Mm-hmm because everybody I have the same

Time energy and capacity as you yeah, like anyone listening to this, we all are in the same construct of time. We all, we all, yes, our energy may vary, but we all have control to take care of ourselves, to do more things that we like, to begin to evolve our life in a way to where we have higher energy. But we all have a limit, a human physical and mental capacity. And if we go over it we collapse in even me right like I have completely organized perfectly designed time beautiful rhythm clear vision and goals and executing everything within this beautiful matrix I'm highly optimized why am I overwhelmed why am I overwhelmed because I went past capacity right and that's sort of the second edge is understanding your physical

and mental capacity and being able to manage that inside the way that you design your time. Because when you become overwhelmed, your decisions degenerate and then you ultimately start over correcting. By the way, how brilliant you are about that. I make the worst decisions when I'm fatigued. And typically what I'm doing when I'm fatigued is the over correction then I'm like over scheduling then once my energy comes back, I look at a day or a week and I'm like, oh my gosh What was I thinking when I agreed to all of this stuff? And a lot of it isn't productive stuff and then I don't have time for the things that would move the needle in my fitness in My mental health in my financial life and all of a sudden

Lots of stuff is in a schedule that doesn't necessarily move the needle in my life in the areas that I want the needle to move to. Speaking of life and needle moving, I don't know if you texted me this or you posted it. So probably doesn't matter, but that's the micro stuff. The macro is you're so obsessed with this that you look at like duration of time on the planet.

And it was something about you just realize you read something on your you're laughing but you did you text me this or did you post it? I just posted that I wanted to live one million hours. That's exactly right. So you read something that convinced you that you're going to that you could live to a particular age and you deduced how many hours there. So I actually think this is brilliant because this type of focus causes us to live with intention and Attention and the lack of I think all the time. Do you know when I pray at night? You're gonna laugh at this Never said this out loud. Not even to my wife. I'm gonna tell you and about 70 billion people right now When I pray at night, one of my last prayers is that I'm gonna live to 128 years old

Okay, and I really believe now again someone will listen to this in three years. Wow, it's so sad he passed away, but but but I I have that prayer and that intention and I've repeated it over and over and over and over again Because I believe if I don't pick a number if I don't pick a time if I don't set a goal if I don't then I'll be up to the whims of whatever else comes my way And I really believe that you create a space when you set something like that that didn't exist before you did it. And then you find the behaviors, the people, the things, the thoughts, the technology, the nutrition to fill it up. What I didn't do was calculate the amount of hours that it gives me to then optimize that time. So

speak to that whole thing. Yeah. And look, I'm, you know, it makes, it really makes me happy. That means we're going to, we're literally, we're going to be friends deep into our hundreds. I love it. We're going to be having these conversations about, well, what do you think? You're thinking you're going to 128. You think you're good. I don't know. I'm Bush. I'm feeling pretty good right now. But I think about it more from a, this is what I'm big on, this is your existence, right? And this is the framework of the human experience, right? You only truly can judge anything, your energy, how well you're using time, everything

that's happened in your past, how you actually feel in the present moment. You can only do it in the present moment and you only experience it in your mind, right? And then you have to make a decision of like, I want to change all of these things. So I'm going to create a better future experience. That is the human experience. And I realized that I wanted to make it last to 112. I initially wanted to live to 104 and be shot in a rocket into space and explore the universe without the light pollution from planet Earth for the last year before I died and then floated out into the cosmos. Now, that was before I had a wife and kids. So it's like now the audacity of don't worry about me. And then like I'm up there for like 24 more years. Like, so that changed.

And then when I read the book, Iki guy, right, the Japanese long life and happiness book, they talked about super centurions and I'm like, oh, like that brand. I want to be a super centurion. So then I made it at then I made it that I would want to be a super centurion. So then I made it at, um, then I made it, uh, that I would want to live to 112. And then as I started getting deeper into, okay, how many days is that? All right. Okay. That's how many days I have. This is how many days that I've done so far. Then when I was going,

going through my time matrix and we're looking at all these different things where I spend time of like, wow, I spend nearly as much time shooting a television show as I will picking up my kids and taking them to school for the year. Right? And to me, as I just started looking at these hours and then where am I losing a lot of time? On the couch watching Netflix. You know what I mean? It's me and the wife on there watching our favorite show. But boy, when you start looking at what that is, man, you're letting the hard 8 to 9% go

on the couch. You know what I mean? Like it's cold hard reality. But as I looked at that, you know, I then was like, you know, what is like, what's a round number of time and like, wow, 1 million hours is 114 years and 54 days. I'm gonna, I'm gonna experience a million hours on this earth. Right.

And so of course, a lot of people push back on like, oh, it's good. Yeah. You're like a vegetable. What are you going to do? And it's like, like, I didn't even contemplate that. And it's because you live in two different mindsets. There's, I live in a mindset that I just keep getting healthier and happier,

more balanced, lighter. Life is more effortless. My system, that is my entire body is more efficient. And I can show you in blood work. I can show you in net worth. I can show you in time and I can show you in blood work, I can show you in net worth, I can show you in time, and I can show you in qualitative data that I have collected about how I feel about my life work and health, that I am in healthier, better physical condition, wealthier, more balanced and happier in the data, which only proves to me there's no reason why you can't keep getting healthier happier and wealthier for the for the remainder of your life

and then I'll just fall right off a cliff you know whatever it ends up ending but again what's it go back to I want to live with with absolute intention and I want to experience every moment that I get into and feel the vividness and the richness and the beauty that is the human experience and life.