THE ED MYLETT SHOW - They Didn’t Think They Were Good Enough...Until They Did This | Ed Mylett

Episode Date: February 14, 2026

What if the only thing standing between you and your next level is the story you keep telling yourself about not being good enough? In this mashup, I bring together some of the toughest, most battle tested men and women I know to talk about something almost nobody wants to admit. That quiet voice that says you do not belong here. That you are not ready. That you are going to get exposed. You are going to hear from Michael Chandler, Damar Hamlin, Fallon Taylor, Andre Ward, Michael Chandler, Jason Wilson, and Dean Graziosi as they open up about imposter syndrome, doubt, setbacks, and the defining decision to rise anyway. Michael Chandler talks about the thermometer in your life and how many of us unconsciously cool ourselves down when success starts heating up. He shares how a little bit of imposter syndrome can keep you humble and hungry, but how letting it dominate your thinking will sabotage everything. Andre Ward breaks down what it really means to absorb a punch and still throw one back. Not just in the ring, but in life. Fallon Taylor and Damar Hamlin remind us that sometimes you do not find your strength until you are forced to confront your fragility. Jason Wilson speaks powerfully about identity and manhood, and what it takes to believe you are worthy of the stage you are standing on. Dean Graziosi brings it home with the truth that you cannot give away what you have not built within yourself first. One of the biggest themes in this episode is preparation. Confidence is not something you wish for. It is something you earn. When you prepare at a level that most people are unwilling to, you begin to silence that voice that says you do not belong. The separator in life is not talent. It is the ability to take a hit, keep your composure, and keep moving forward without obsessing over what everyone else thinks. You are going to hear story after story of people who did not feel ready, did not feel qualified, did not feel worthy, but chose to act anyway. They did not wait for the doubt to disappear. They built a new self concept through action, discipline, faith, and relentless preparation. That is how you close the gap between who you are today and who you are capable of becoming. If you have ever questioned whether you belong in the room, whether you are capable of the dream in your heart, this episode is for you. You were not born average. You were not born to sit on the sidelines of your own life. You were born to max it out. And the moment you decide you are worthy of the stage is the moment everything begins to change. Key Takeaways Why a small amount of imposter syndrome can fuel growth, but letting it dominate will cap your potential How preparation builds real confidence that no critic can take away The true separator in life is the ability to absorb a punch and keep throwing Why your self concept determines the temperature of your success How to stop worrying about public perception and start running your own race The power of earning your belief in yourself through discipline and action Why you have a duty to maximize your gifts so you can serve others at a higher level 👉 SUBSCRIBE TO ED'S YOUTUBE CHANNEL NOW 👈⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠   → → → CONNECT WITH ED MYLETT ON SOCIAL MEDIA: ← ← ←  ➡️ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠INSTAGRAM⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠   ➡️⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠FACEBOOK⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠   ➡️ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠LINKEDIN⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠   ➡️ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠X ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠  ➡️ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠WEBSITE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is the Edmiler's show. Hey, everyone, welcome to my weekend special. I hope you enjoy the show. Be sure to follow the Edmilet show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. Now on with the show. Welcome back to the show, everybody.

So the young man I'm going to introduce to you is he's like a second son to me. I'm honored when he calls me dad. He's one of the greatest fighters in the world in the UFC. but he's really one of the greatest people that I've ever met. I love him dearly. He's a good man. He knows how to be successful. And so tonight, the podcast is really about two things for those of you listening.

We're going to talk about this huge fight he's upcoming on June 29th with Connor McGregor. We're going to talk about that fight. But for those of you that aren't fight fans, we're going to spend the majority of the podcast, not just talking about that fight, but talking about winning, preparing, mindset, preparation. And so if you're a fight fan, this is an experience. exclusive peek into this fight. And if you're not a fight fan, it's not going to matter because we're going to talk all the time, as we always do on the show, about things you can take notes on

and apply to your own life. So June 29th, the great Michael Chandler, Connor McGregor, my guest today is my son from another, I don't know, you say son from another mother. Is that right? I guess so. I don't know. He's my son. Michael, welcome to the show. What's up, dad, man. Thank you for the kind intro. You are the man. Is there a part of you that has imposter syndrome, if you're being candid with the audience, that you do come from humble beginnings, you have had ups and downs, you are coming off of, you know, you haven't had a six-fight win streak even right now if we're being candid, right? So is there a part of you that has to overcome these mental demons, so to speak, of believing you belong, believing you can win that I think most people struggle with or have you passed that stage of your life? I think I definitely still have a certain degree of it, but I think I've gotten to the point where it's been revealed to me enough

through life, the course of life, that the older you get, the more people you come into contact with, the more people you train with or you're in business with, or you watch their work ethic, or you watch how they live their lives, both in front of the camera, behind the camera, behind closed doors,

in front of, you know, in front of the public. And you start to really look around and take stock and think, you know what? I do think that the golden diamonds was was reserved for God's people, not the devil's bunch. You know, I do think that the good among us are supposed to go out and capture those things. And before it used to be like, yeah, but you don't deserve it. You don't, you know, you don't deserve that. And if you do get that, well, what's going to happen? Maybe you're going to start rubbing people the wrong way.

And I think I've gotten over that and realized, man, if you don't have a bunch of fruit on the back of your cart you can't pass it out to people if you've got nothing on your cart you can't pass it out to people and i do think i have i have a duty to be successful because i can then use it to change people's lives where until i got to a certain point it was like well i'm a little bit afraid you you actually were the first person i heard you talked about the thermometer right and i was that guy like i'm okay with the thermometer getting to here but i'm a little nervous if it gets too high and that that thermometer just keeps you keeps getting higher and higher and higher and I'm getting okay with it each time. So I do think I have a little bit of a degree of that as, you know, once again, you keep leveling up. Every time you level up, now you're into a new realm. So of course, there's a little bit of it, but you say, wait a second, I've been here before. Let me watch how this plays out. And at the end of the day, when I lay my head on the pillow at night, I know that I deserve it. I'm the one of those guys who deserves to go and capture that because of the way that I live my life. That's exactly right. You've

earn this. And by the way, everyone, a little bit of everything in moderation is actually good. So a little bit of imposter syndrome keeps you what you see in this young man right here, humble, keeps you training hard, remind you, I better outwork this dude because maybe I don't have everything they have. A lot of imposter syndrome will cause your thermometer to prune the air conditioner on and you'll cool your life back down. So a little bit of it is not, you don't have to eradicate all of your imposter syndrome. You have to eradicate that it's your dominant thought. But to have that in the back a little bit is not all that bad. I have it, which is what causes me to prepare for a speech or a podcast. It's what's caused me to save my money because I don't believe all my press

clippings. I don't believe I'm always going to win. Everything's entitled to me. And so it's a healthy thing to some extent. Let me ask you this. I was watching some fights, you know, preparing for, you know, our work. And my son's like, dad, these guys are so good. And, you know, I've hit bags and spar and you know all that part of my background. And, and I'm, and I've, you know, all that part of my background. And I said, Max, the different thing that you don't realize, because it looks like a video game when you watch people fight, is they're getting hit and still throwing punches back at the same time. That's the one thing I think when people watch any sort of combat, whether it's Mikey Sport and Boxing or yours, they just underestimate how

difficult it is to absorb punishment and return it. It's one thing to just dole out punishment into a bag, right? Or to hit mitts. It's a very, you know, to hit Mitz. It's a very, different thing. And that's really, I told my son, I said, Max, that's the game of life. The game of life is everything looks good at the seminar. When you read the book or listen to the podcast, it's sort of like these offensive strategies. But the people that I've seen win, and I want you to talk about this and fighting it in your life, the people that I've seen win, they have this very special ability to absorb a punch and still throw back. And that's the separator in life. And it certainly is in sports as well. So just speak to that, Michael. I mean, metaphorically, you do it in there. And by the way, you may want to be the greats at all time at doing that. This is a dude who almost out on his feet can still knock people out better than anybody that's ever probably been in the sport or at least one of them. But what about that fact of life and actually in the sport literally? Yeah, I mean, it's very interesting because I do think metaphorically, right, there's a lot of similarities there.

But even realistically, I think from a physical standpoint, I think sometimes it's, it's easier to take the blows inside of taking huge shots inside of a fight and keep coming forward where because there's not as much of an ego involved because I'm not really worried about what how everybody perceives the punch that just land on me landed on me whereas in life, in business, in our relationships, we have a failed account or a failed relationship or we have, we have a setback here. Immediately everybody stops and thinks, looks in the mirror and says, what's everybody else thinking around me, you know?

whereas in mixed martial arts, I don't have the time, and I call it a luxury. I think I have the luxury of not having any time. If I sit and I dwell on that one punch that just landed in it, and it rocked me,

and I start thinking about what the people in the nosebleeds are in the front row are thinking about that shot that just landed, the second, the third, the fourth are going to come and the knockout

is going to ensue, whereas in life, a lot of times we are stifled and stymied so much by, we take one blow, we take one shot, we take one setback, and we're just worried

about everything else with instead of just you know the definition of persistence is continuing in a course of action with complete disregard to previous failures and future opposition right so in life we stop and we think way too much about what's everybody else thinking or how is this going to look on social media what are the what are the press clippings going to say like you said like with there's so much to it and i've gotten really good at and this happened to me when i came to the ufc like you said i was outside the ufc relative obscurity i trained hard I was a good athlete, but I wasn't a famous athlete. Then all of a sudden you come over, you're the biggest free agent signing,

maybe in UFC history, and everything doubles in five times the following and five times the interviews and five times the platform. And all of a sudden, wait a second, I better get used to public criticism very quickly or else I'm going to, I'm going to, this ship's going to sink. So I've just gotten really good at realizing, man, no matter what, this is my race that I'm running and I love you but it's still my race and I love my wife my kids and I love my coaches but this is still my race and if I can just focus on me and know know that if I just keep moving forward and if anything we don't follow people because of their successes we follow people

more even for their failures because they were able to overcome something people love us people love a comeback and that's what my story my whole story has been about I am a blueprint for how you get down, get back up, and keep moving forward, and then somehow end up in the biggest fight of the last decade. By the way, he's also has a future in my space in the personal development, motivational coaching space, as you can tell, because he's got this insane ability to articulate his thoughts. Okay, a couple more things.

Separations in the preparation. I don't know if there's a more finely trained athlete on the planet than you right now. I mean, in any sport, this dude's a specimen. He trains his ass off. Do you like to train or do you do it because you know it produces a result and how important in anything someone's doing? Particularly if maybe they think they lack something is to gain their confidence from the prep, from the preparation. I think I do love to do it because you ever ask yourself like, what's the alternative? you know what is the alternative i do think i use the word easy lightly because i'm sure the audience is

like dude i watch the training it looks crazy but for me it's easy my hard is different than your hard and different than hard for everyone else me thinking about doing some of the things that you do that sounds crazy to me but to me maybe working out as hard as i do half the audience is like man i would die in the warm up but it's become not easy in the sense that it's not hard every time i do it but it's what I do. It's not who I be, but it is what I do, and I'm pretty darn good at it. And I do know that it produces results. And I do think, you know, going back to the imposter syndrome or going back to the self-sabotage and going back to the temperature gauge, going back to my self-concept or my lowly self-concept that I used to have, if back when I was

14 years old, I didn't get into hand-to-hand combat thinking, okay, I'm not that talented, so I have to outwork everybody. And I've been able to take that now for the last 28 years. and I've never, ever lost it. And I've won world titles. I fought for the world title in the UFC. I have fought Madison Square Garden twice, fighting a year, debut of the year. I've got all of these different accolades.

But still, the cornerstone always is, me remembering that little 14-year-old boy who walked into Northwest High School and knew that I had just started wrestling and everybody else had been there for years. And I need to outwork all these people or I'm never going to get to where I'm going. And I still have that as a 38-year-old in the sport,

28 years in the sport. So I look at it like I am grateful that I have these two capable arms and these two capable legs to be able to do what I do. And I look at it as a blessing that I, you know, I train here in Deerfield Beach, Florida, and there's two gyms connected to each other. There's a physical therapy. There's a physical therapy clinic in our same interests. We share one.

And I see people coming in in wheelchairs. I see people coming in with cerebral palsy. see people coming in with really bad injuries, car accidents, paralysis, all these different things. And I know it sounds a little bit dark to think about, right? But I am so blessed to be able to do what I get to do. And every single one of those people would give anything to trade one week of this well-enabled body, to be able to live in this well-enabled body. And I really always have looked at that blessing that most people have, they can talk about

depression or they can talk about anxiety and sadness and all of these different things, but we have so many things to be thankful for that we just gloss over and overlook and just keep moving forward. And I think that's where it is, knowing I can outwork everybody, taking my gratefulness and my gratitude for the abilities that I have and the opportunity that I have and thinking about the alternative. The alternative is me going to get in a job somewhere and I love what I do and I get to do it every single day. It's my producers. I guarantee you are just their mouths are open right now because right before you got here, I recorded a podcast. It'll come out after this one.

But I talked about focusing on what you possess as opposed to what you don't have and then having perspective questions about the fact that someone's got it worse than you. And when you're actually able to do those two things and focus on what you have as opposed to what you're missing and focus on the fact that you're blessed to have what you do have that someone's got it worse. It's just amazing. Then you just go say this. How much is your two last questions?

How much is your growth on you? Like most people can tell from listening to you now, but I want everyone to This man works very hard on himself. Like Michael in his downtime, I'm not his only friend in this space. Michael will attend events. He's read the books. He listens to the podcast. He'll speak at these events as well.

He's worked very hard on the internal him. And there's two elements of that. He's a man of very strong faith. But he's also worked on his mind, worked on his thinking, worked on himself, worked on that thermostat setting. How much of that, aside from all the, physical training. Do you attribute to the fact that you're going to be in the octagon on the 29th with McGregor? I think it's got, I mean, it has everything to do with it. I mean, really, and I made this, you know, I made this realization years ago when you were talking about, you know,

if for the people that don't know, I went 688 days without winning a fight. And for a lot of people, that's a death sentence for an MMA career, you know, going from world champion in Belator to losing three fights in a row thinking that at any point in time I was going to get my walking papers or going to get a phone call that I was going to get cut from the organization. And in that time, I realized I was doing all the physical work. If you're my coach and you tell me to run through that wall, I will run through that wall. No questions asked. And I will do it harder and faster and better than every single else behind me. But what I wasn't working on was my mind. And what I wasn't working on is this self-image. And I was letting that get away from me. All I was doing was

building up a bigger, faster, stronger, subpar version of the man that I was really created to be because inside of here, inside of my mind was so, it was lacking and it was so important, but it needed to be revealed to me. And that was a thing, too, if a bad thing happens to you, but a good thing comes from it and you become a better person, a better man, a better father, a better husband, a better human being, you got to ask yourself, was it really a bad thing if a good thing comes from it. And I think I look at that point in my career and realize that was the catalyst and the springboard that was going to catapult me. That was the winding of the spring. And it was a painful winding of the spring. It was it came with tears. It came with self-doubt.

It came with embarrassment. Overwhelming embarrassment. But it was that quilling of that spring that eventually springboarded me to becoming the next version of the man that I needed to be. And yeah, I mean, I've always been, I've always just been curious. and admired people like yourself who are trying to make the world a better place, admitting their flaws, showing and wearing their heart on their sleeve, and talking about the struggles that you have gone through, and how there's a lesson in every single loss. And, you know, I've been very blessed with so many great friends.

And I have a duty to them to continue to be a part of that community. And I have a duty to my family and I have a duty to myself. And most importantly, I have a duty to myself. to my almighty God who created me, not just to be good, not just to be that little boy who was going to play it small and think that he doesn't deserve great things and think that I could just barely get enough and barely get by and live paycheck to paycheck and nobody knows my name. I was commissioned and I have this conviction, this deep conviction to know that I was created to do something extraordinary and it took years and years and years.

And I just want to keep on adding to that. And when people say the sky is the limit, you know, it's a term that we use, but at some point you start to believe it. And you believe it not because of the Bittles and the Bougatis and the boats and the watches and all the material things, but it's the things that you make people feel just with your presence and with your words and your voice. And that's what I want to be able to do. And now we've got the biggest platform we ever could have asked for.

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diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. So last week, I'm on stage speaking. I got a new shirt on. Got a bunch of DMs from my friends that were there going, you're looking pretty fly, Milet, you're looking pretty sharp. Then I get off the stage and the producer says, hey, I like that button-up look on you. Guess where I got it all from. Quince, it's true. It's a great place to buy clothes that look good, feel good, and it's affordable. And there's the biggest thing. I'm not breaking the bank this year on clothes and I'm probably sure you don't want to do that either. So that cashmere sweater you're looking at, you can get it there ridiculously soft, doesn't cost a fortune. The button-up shirt I was wearing last week, that's where I got.

it. Let me just tell you something. I also like this. If it doesn't fit, send it back, they'll send you the one that does. They're awesome. I'm getting, I don't know, 50% of my wardrobe now, all from Quince. So, refresh your wardrobe with Quince. Go to quince.com slash ed for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. Now available in Canada, too, by the way. That's Quince, Q-U-I-N-C-E dot com slash ed. Free shipping and 365-day returns. Quince.com slash ed. Very short intermission here, folks. I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far. Don't forget to follow the show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. Now on to our next guest. Welcome back to Max Out, everybody. I'm so excited about today's program because I'm one of the most inspirational people I think on Earth today with me.

And she was also, I always put these polls out to you guys saying, who do you want on my show? And there kept being this name coming, this beautiful name, by the way, Fallon Taylor, Fallon Taylor. Get her on your show. And so I'm so excited that she's here to. This lady to my left is amazing. She's an incredible entrepreneur. She's got an amazing social media and YouTube presence, but she's probably best known for being a world barrel racing champion. And not only is that extraordinary, but she did that after breaking her neck and having a 2% chance to even ever walk again,

and she comes back and wins what is really the world series of barrel racing. So I'm so excited for you guys to hear this story. So thank you for being here. Thank you so much. I really am excited to be here. So guys, now, here we go. Just so you know, if you're driving the car, you need to grip your steering wheel

a little bit tighter because this is about to get really good, like really hugely inspiring. If you're on the treadmill at the gym, you're about to go from level 7 to level 10 like that. And if you're watching YouTube, this is the part where you bring your kids in the room and you say, watch this, okay? So tell them what happens. You're starting to make your comeback. Guys, this is one of the most amazing stories you're going to hear. So you're making your comeback. and what happens? Well, I'd like to tell you my mantra that it's going to get rocky

and I'm going to tell you the mantra that my dad told me the whole time throughout my entire career and me being very risky was whatever you do, don't end up in a hospital because you'll die in there. Wow. And, you know, it just kind of rang in my head because I was riding dangerous horses

and I was doing a lot of training and then I started training around the clock because of the weather and I needed my bills paid and I'm riding, riding, riding, riding, and taking chances that I shouldn't have had to take you know, just because I was not understanding my growth, and I wasn't understanding my contribution. And so I was training really late at night in August in 2009.

And I'm riding this horse that's fine. Everything's fine. We're training. Everything's normal. My poor staff member was there with her boyfriend, and it's just us lonely at night, lights on in the arena, and I'm going to train this horse. And as I was taking off around the arena,

this horse slipped kind of in a mud puddle. And it was not a big deal. You know, whatever. He slips, and he was feeling frisky. And you kind of know that when a horse behaves a certain way, he's feeling a little frisky. I should have known better, I should have taken more precautions, but I didn't.

It's what I do for a living, what's the big deal? And I start laughing, I start giggling, and this horse starts to buck. And when I say buck, you know, horses can play and buck, and they can crow hop and buck. This horse did something that's like a wild instinct. So he reared up when he did, he broke all the bones on this side of my face.

And when he came down to the ground, I'm still laughing. I'm like, okay, whatever. And you know, in the cowboy industry, it's, you gotta be tough, you know. And so I start to pull this horse up and as I do, he hits me in the head again and I skull fracture in four places. Of course I don't know this. And of course I'm not wearing a helmet because that's just not the cool, tough thing to do.

And he begins to buck a little bit more. And I just decide that I'm gonna pick a place off over here to jump off, which is a terrible idea. But I picked a place to kind of jump off. and when I did he kicked my feet about 13 or 14 feet in the air and I landed straight down on my head my legs just kind of flopped over and I was unable to move I was paralyzed right in that moment and what a tough place to be in you know because I was in this horrible relationship and in a spot where I'm like

who's gonna save me you know so all I have is my career if I get hurt I can't make a living? How am I gonna take care of myself? I'm in this horrible place. How am I gonna get up? I gotta get up. And so my friend came over. I was strapped down to a picnic table because I was too cheap to ride in an ambulance. So I get taken in a pickup truck on a, in a pickup truck on a picnic table to the hospital and I get there and I start joking with the staff because it's just my way. And the lady in the front desk, My friend went in and asked for a gurney. And she said, you don't need a gurney.

That girls out there telling jokes, quit being so dramatic. So my friend that was a paramedic, they take me in, and they finally get me a gurney. I could have walked, I think, I think I could have. But when I got through the MRI machine and joking with the doctor that was helping me, I kept telling him, you know, Hooters closes in 15 minutes and we're really close now. Like, let's go get some food. tell me I have a concussion, let's get out of here. And he came back in the room, he said,

you have a 2% chance to live. And he said, it's really been touching to get to know you. But he said, the plane's running, and you have 13-minute flight to think about your life. And I hope that you really take that time to think about what you're going to do now, because you're never going to ride horses again. And I'll never forget getting, I don't know why I remember the guy's names.

They were two guys named Russell that carried me to the plane and had me in the sea collar and strapped to the table and I get to... Can someone get me some tissue please? Someone grab one? Thank you. I get to the

hospital room and there's a whole other story in the hospital, but I was told again I have 2% chance to live that I would never walk again. The neurosurgeon told me I was an absolute idiot for riding horses.

Thank you. They don't stop. They come down and it's over. It's beautiful. So I had a second to think, and all I could think of was my dad telling me, you know, you're going to die in a hospital. You can't, don't die in a hospital. And I'm like, this is crazy superstition that you're going to die in a hospital.

And I wake up the next day heavily drugged, obviously, with a halo on. I had a girlfriend in the hospital tell me they're going to offer you two scenarios. You can get the surgery with the box in your neck, or you can get the halo. they're going to shave your head. You're going to have holes in your head. She said, go that way. I've seen this go a bunch of different ways. So when the doctor came in, I started bawling, and I was like, I want the halo.

You know, all I can think of is this cage on my head. I want the halo. At this point, I've called my mom and dad and told them that I was an offender bender. Because they're with their grandkids in California. I'm like, I'm an offender bender, everything's fine. It's all fine. It's going to be fine. And I've got to figure out a way to get out of this hospital.

So I get these nurses that come in and I say, hey, how can I get out of here? Because now I've got this real embedded childhood fear that I'm going to die in the hospital. And I've got a damn good chance at this point with the situation I'm in. It's actually true. I could die in here. So shout out to all the amazing medical professionals because it's just my own superstition. They did an amazing job. One came in, I said, I need to get out of here.

And she laughed at me and she said, well, you know, when you can walk from one into the hall to the other, then they'll let you out. But you're not going to do that. You've got a long time. You need to settle in. You've got about six months. You're going to be here. So the next nurse came in and she said, she laughed at me and she goes, you know, she's writing. Oh, you've got six months.

You know, you just like settle in. And then the next lady came in really late on shift and she was amazing. And if I could find her, I would give her everything I've got. She came in and I said, how do I get out of here? I got to get out of here. I got to get out of here. And she said, well, you walk to the end of hall and you come back. You can get out.

And I said, well, let's do that. How do we do that? Wow. She said, well, you got to get up. And the big risk is, you know, if and when you fall down, you know, you can wiggle your fingers and toes. And that's good. But when you get up, it's not going to feel like you thought it was. And you got all this equipment on your head.

You're going to hit the ground. And then you could die. And I was like, well, they've given me terrible odds at this point. So what the hell? Wow. And it was just very cool. this lady that moment, she has no idea what she did for me because she was just like, just, well, you know, I'm willing to try it. So she takes the belt and she ties it to the ceiling.

And I get up and I fall down just like she said I would. And then she said, if you just put one foot in front of the other, you know, you can get down to the end of the hall and it could take you months, but we're going to try it. Wow. It took me about an hour and a half. And I got up and down at the end of the hall. And I took all the people that didn't believe me. you know, the lady at the front desk and the nurses that came in, and I said, tomorrow I'm going to deliver flowers to each and every one of you guys because you didn't believe. And maybe I can change your mind because other people are going to come in here.

Oh, my gosh. And they need to know they can walk. And so the next day, I gathered up all my strength. Mom at this point knows that I've had, I've been structurally destroyed, is what I was told. She got called from actually a newspaper outlet that was interviewing for rodeo public. publication that had leaked my medical records. So my parents found out in that way. So now I've got to do damage control and learn to walk.

And I told mom, I said, we gotta go to the florist. I made him a promise. And so it was a really cool scene to watch all of these people that just didn't believe, instead of me being angry at these people that didn't believe in my journey, to just shine a light on it and show them a different way. So I went and got floral arrangements for every single person that told me I couldn't do it.

And I walked in there and I walked to each of their offices and I think hopefully I gave them a gift that they can always have that you're amazing you might not believe how I'm going to do it but it gave me a lot of clarity too sometimes you're just not asking the right person well you know I you well I think I think everybody should just literally go back and listen to all of this again thank you you make this honestly I'm gonna tell you something this is like such a blessing to be here with you thank you It's a blessing to be here with you.

Thank you. I'm really moved right now. Thank you. And I'm trying to not get too moved so that I can still ask you questions. It has a happy ending. I know. It's such a happy ending. But it's a, I know we're going to go to there, but it's a happy ending because of everything you just said.

That there's so many things in there that we all have these people who don't believe in us and we're scared. And they're scared too. They're scared to tell me I could walk down the hall because they know I can't. They're scared too. And maybe that's true for so many people where you have these people in your life that are close to you that are maybe pulling you down. Maybe they're just scared for you. Maybe they're scared for them and you're going to leave them too, right? Absolutely.

And everything that you have. And I just want to acknowledge you like you're freaking amazing. Thank you. Like you're amazing. And I just, now, just to be clear with everybody, this break was very serious, very similar to Christopher Reeve, right? And I mean, not all that dissimilar injury, correct? It's not. It's the same injury.

So when you break your C2, that's what controls your head going left or right. And you have a very, very, very small chance of making it out on the other side. With a lot of neck breaks, this would be the one that you really don't want, you know, to happen. Unbelievable. I'm picturing you there. I mean, you tell the story so well, I can actually picture you. And I'm so proud of you. Thank you.

You're just remarkable. And everybody that just heard this, I told them they were going to be moved. but I didn't even know until you told it in front of me how much it would move me. It puts in perspective so many things that I think are big obstacles in my life that really aren't. Sure. And so many things that I think are a really big deal. And they're not. And that is a big deal.

You wake up and wiggle your fingers and your toes tomorrow. You're going to be like, oh, okay. My gosh. We're all okay. Just amazing. And so now it gets actually more amazing now. Thank you. Yes.

You go through the process of rebuilding yourself. and then you make the crazy decision it would seem to me to actually get back on a horse again, right? So what was that like and what was the first time like if you don't mind sharing that as well? It was horrible, and I would love to share it. I was like Ricky Bobby in the race car. I'm killing it!

And then you look over and people are like, yeah, you're doing really great, sweetie, you're walking. This is great. And so I thought, you know, learning to walk again is a pretty big hurdle. It's pretty tough. And then learning to ride again and you get over the path that,

okay, I'm going to do this again. And the neurosurgeons telling me, I shouldn't do this again. Sure. Okay, now I'm going to wear some helmets. I'm going to wear a helmet and I'm going to actually do this thing the right way. And then I started thinking about,

I wonder if other people have had these things and I start to read everybody's story and I start to wonder if the human mind can comprehend getting up and walking out of a hospital when you've been told a 2% chance, maybe I can go back to a 14-year-old me that wanted a world title, and let's do this thing, and let's actually give it a shot. And I thought, if I can have a goal big enough that makes my future look brighter than my past,

then that will keep me hooked towards something that I want so badly. Because we're all going to lose, and you're going to suck, and you're going to go broke doing it, and you're going to have people that don't want you to do it, and you're going to fail ultimately and keep getting up and dust off and fail. But if the thing is so bright that you have to walk toward it, you'll stay hooked. And I stayed hooked. And I had a horse in my front pasture, just a small brief rundown.

I had a horse in my front pasture that the trainer told me nobody could ride. And I thought, well, that would be pretty cool. I'm going to go get that one. Oh, my gosh. So I got that horse that was raised on my place. And I actually, her mom and dad was the horse. I went to the national finals on when I was a kid. And I was like, I'm going to ride this thing.

And I trained her and within a year, we were already fighting for another chance back to the national finals rodeo. What? Which is just unheard of. And she's just been. Is this baby flow? This is baby flow. Okay. So that was a really cool part of my journey.

And then I hit another road bump, just what I think everybody does. I qualified for the national finals rodeo in 2013. And here I am, I'm ready to go, and I'm going to show the world, and I go in, and I was terrible on TV, 10 days in a row. It was just the worst ever. And I thought, well, there went the walking miracle thing. Like, now they're just like, she's a walking miracle that doesn't ride very good. Oh, my gosh. Here we go.

Okay, it's a pretty big walking miracle to be there, but I understand what a letdown not to perform your best. I've got this career, and, you know, people have known that I've already been, and here's my comeback 20 years later, or 25 years later, or whatever it is. and boom, and I'm terrible on this big platform. And I thought, man, I've got to do this better. Was that what you were thinking, stayed there? So at the time, but were you super depressed, super bummed out for a while? I just want to have people understand what that's like. So the season, the season ends September 30th, or is it September 31st?

September, end of September. Okay. October 1st, it begins. So you have a 24-hour span to be really depressed. or get it together. And it was in that moment, I was like, okay, I've got to do this again. I got to do this again.

And I want to show my parents what my horse can do. And if I just put that, that is my big light at the end of the tunnel. Maybe I put that in front of the world title. Maybe I just scale it back. Maybe I just do this one thing of just, I want to show my face on TV again, running my horse as this person with this cool comeback story,

and I want to make a difference. And I want to show that. Nobody show me stats, nobody show me numbers, nobody talk about anything. I qualified back third in the world. The girl that was winning it was a sure thing. Second place was the sure thing. Third place was the girl that blows it on TV.

But let's all feel sorry for her, you know, because the next thing. So I come back and I decided that I'm going to put my head down and I don't want to talk about anything, but just focusing on one foot in front of the other, just like I did before, because that's been my formula. Literally like learning to walk again. Literally one foot in front of the other. So you know what, everybody, I really appreciate the comments about, you know,

I've gotten a lot leaner and built more muscle this year. And it was really intentional. And I was thinking, how can I get ahead, you know, on my fitness? Because I already pretty fit and worked out. And it was how I'm eating. And that's where Factor came in. Factor doesn't ask you to meal prep or follow recipes. It just removes the entire problem.

Two minutes, real food, bam, done. And so once I started eating healthier and using Factor, not only did I get a lot leaner, but I built more muscle. And the truth is, guys, I had more energy. And what I love about factors, it's already made by chefs designed by dietitians and delivered to your door. You should be in factors world, just like I am. Head to factormeals.com slash my let 50 off. And use code my let 50 off to get 50% off your first factor box plus free breakfast for a year.

offer only valid for new customers with code and qualifying auto-renewing subscription purchase. Make healthier eating easy with factor. So I get on my horse. Round one comes. I've never won a round at the National Finals Rodeo at this point. I've made like 50 runs in that arena. Never won. I've placed done well.

Before breaking your neck. Before breaking my neck. I've done good. My 51st run, I win it. I told all my staff, all my friends, everybody I said, let's go home, wrap it up. I don't want to make the other nine runs. I'm done. Victory.

Let's go. Amazing. So then I thought, well, if we just keep doing this one foot in front of the other thing, let's just keep doing that. So run by run, the sure thing, girl, just starts slipping down the pack. Boom, boom, boom. And then here I am. And of course, you know, there's people that love you and hate you in sports.

So I'm getting, you know, people that think I'm ridiculous and people that think that I'm great and, you know, whatever. It's polarizing. It's fun for the fans. But the sure thing second place, girl, she's really a sure thing. And she just starts going. And she's doing great. I'm doing great. And I look up to her so much.

So it's cool for us to be kind of in this battle. And something I've never said before, I think, on any of my social media, is that the 10th round that would determine the champion, she came up to me. And she shook my hand and she said, well, you've done really great. And I'm just super excited for you. And I thought, I just won the world title. because I realized that she hadn't celebrated yet

and I already had and in my mind I had my outfit picked out and I was going to be wearing gold because the gold buckle and I was going to be the gold title holder and I would have this gold and I knew that when I walked in I would jump up and down and I would have this gold buckle in my hand and I was like wow if I just don't mess this up

this is going to work and I went in she made a beautiful run it was great and they swung the gate open for me to go and my dad's standing right beside me and I was like, man, this would be a really bad time to screw this up, wouldn't it? Just put one foot in front of the other. Don't try anything fancy. And I think that's been something that I've held with me so long

that's so effective. Go in and I made my run and I come out and I look at the board and I'm the winner. I'm the winner. And of course I lose it and I'm losing it. And the cameras are coming and the ESPN's here and CBS is here and all of them are coming around. And I look at my dad and he was like,

you just won the world. I was like, I'm going to go jump on that stage, just like I did in my head really quick. Oh, my gosh. And it was so cool, and they, you know, whisk me off, and here I go down into the bottom. And just a funny, funny story is the security guard said, you didn't win it. They made a mistake. It's someone else. And I was like, someone needs to get me a bucket because I am for sure going to vomit right now.

And they came back and said, it's amazing. We actually give the victory lap to the person that wins the average, and you didn't win the average, but you won the world. Wow. And it's such a cool thing because in my mind, I was shooting for the average. And I wanted to win this, you know, the aggregate. I wanted to be the most consistent person because that's what everybody told me I couldn't be. And I ended up with the world title. So yeah, you don't always get what you want.

Sometimes you get something so much cooler. So much better. It's got to be, I mean, listen, first it should be a movie. Thank you. I mean, for sure. And all of my producer friends that are watching this like, hello, I'll have to give you her Instagram in a minute. It should be a movie. it's an un-freaking believable story.

Like even hearing it now, look at me. Like, I'm just, it's so remarkable what you've achieved. And still continue to achieve too, but I just tell you, like, just so you know, I've had a, just for me, like, this is such a gift for me. Like, I do shows and I love doing them, but today is a gift for me. Like, you're remarkable. You inspire me, the story, the way you tell it. I can't wait for this to go to your audience and people to see it,

because I know somebody is struggling. Well, of course they are. And like you embody, see some people like I talk about these things. That's great. You embody it. You've lived it. You are it. Like it's your evidence of it.

Like you're living proof that the things you teach and talk about are real. Like there's someone right next to me right now who's living proof that you can accomplish anything. That you were washed up in your mind. You were a has been. It was over. So many things I believed about myself that I hear people go, I'm too old and I go, how old are you? 21.

And I'm like, what is wrong with the world? Like, no, you're fine. I don't think anybody at 95 is too old to do something really cool with their life. Do you struggle? Let's go see some things about you. It's hard to move off that, just to be honest with you. I'm actually right on the verge right here. I'm trying to not do what you're doing.

I'm waterworks, so I can keep us going all day. One of us have to not be, right? It should be my turn. By the way, I should be allowed to. On the inside, I certainly am. My audience knows me well enough, too. By the way, I must tell you that it's just, it's remarkable to me the way that you just articulate it, too.

It's so beautiful. But you, though, let's talk about you for a minute, because I think men can relate to what you're going to talk about here in a minute, too, but really women can too. You strike me, as I've gotten to know you a little bit, that you still do struggle with some of these things, whether it be your, maybe even, which is amazing, but even some of your own confidence even to this day.

Is that true? Tell them a little bit about that part of you still and how you navigate through it. Confidence is something that I think everyone, when you walk into a space, you can feel somebody really confident coming out of that space. And when I help people, whether it be with horses or with anything that I help with,

the first thing that I find is that they believe something that's so wildly untrue about themselves and it's so deeply ingrained in themselves that they just, They can't get away from that belief of themselves. And for mine, it was I'm too old to make a comeback, or I'm too injured to get to the gym, or I've already accomplished all that I can accomplish anyway. Or for me, it's like, oh, well, I always need to have a six-pack and be in perfect,

professional athletic shape. And what's so untrue about that is how many people would love to have my body type? How many people would love to be in my position? How many people, if dealt my hand, could play it so much better? How many people, you know, if you just take a look around at people that I'm able to help, you know, I've helped people that weren't even able to leave their home that just need inspiration to be able to, they were, you know, in such a place with their obesity that they're not able to even stand up. How do you tell that person that you don't feel great about your body? How do you tell that person that you're not able to take advantage of all the opportunities in your life? There's always somebody in your position.

there's people that I've met without limbs that are doing more than I've been able to accomplish. So in your position, what are those things that have tied you to that thought that have kept you from where you're going? It's like the elephant tied to the chair, you know? Why the elephant can just walk away. Yeah, and he's so used to believing he can't, he stays right there. Before we start the interview with my next guest, just want to remind you all that you can subscribe to the show on YouTube or follow the show on Apple or Spotify. We have all the links in our show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way.

Now on with the show. Hey, everybody, Ed Milet. I'm so excited to be back with you today with another program on the max-out show. We bring you people all the time that have maxed out areas of their life that are the best in the world. And the gentleman to my left,

the reason I've been after him to do this show for so long is because I think he's maxing out multiple areas of his life. The obvious area is that this is one of the greatest boxers of the last two days. decades and you might even argue in the history of the sport. And so the gentleman to my left here is retired this last year to be a year ago this week, 32 and 0, 32 and 0 has not lost a fight since he was 14 years old and was an Olympic gold medalist went on to win the Super 6 tournament and the super middleweight division and was

a light heavyweight champion of the world. And so this is one of the greatest athletes, but I think one of the great men in the United States. So Andre Ward, thank you for being here today. Appreciate it, man. Thanks for having me. Let's talk a little boxing. We got to go there.

there. We'll talk some family, let's talk some boxing. So I'm curious, I'm a big boxing fan. So when you became on my radar was during the Super 6th tournament. Okay, so that was, and they called that the super middleweight division at the time, correct?

Yeah, 168 pounds. But basically, I'm paraphrasing, Showtime got together and said, let's just find the best one in the world. They put the sixth of you in this tournament. It ended up being a seventh dude or something. Wasn't Jermaine Taylor in it originally, or what happened? Well, there were guys that, like, guys would get knocked out or get injured and then they replace them. The court was always six.

So again, you had Kessler. You had frock, your frock, whatever they call them. There's some dudes in this tournament, right? And you ended up winning that tournament. I'm curious, when it started at that level, was that a new level for you? And like, did you have fear? Like, did you wonder whether you were the man of those six?

How'd that work for you? I had to drop everything. We went, got in the car, got back, to San Diego, flew to the Bay Area, literally dropped my family off, packed a bag, double ear infection, got on a red eye, went to Germany, and was there the next morning to announce the second

leg of the Super 6th and was this close to not being a part of it? That's crazy. And the way they filmed it everybody, by the way, this was so powerful, because all this 24-7 stuff you see now, this is kind of the original of that, and it was so well done. It really changed to some extent how boxing was promoted on

either Showtime or HBO to the way they laid it out. But I watched it closely, and you weren't the dude they were sort of steering the cameras towards in the beginning. It was really interesting. It was the other guys that I've mentioned before. And I remember you won, then you won again. I'm like, oh, this dude's got a chance with this whole tournament. So every one of these fights, just curious, when you went into it, I just want to know how, like, a world-class person thinks or doesn't think.

You're there at that thing in Germany. You see these other five dudes. Are you like, I'm going to win this tournament? I've always had that belief. Like, my career was, my professional career was guided very meticulously, you know, the powers that be, the networks, the suits, the promoters, like, they, they want bang for their buck. They want to make the most money as quickly as possible. And I had opportunities to fight some of the guys that were in the tournament, maybe a year or two earlier. And it was for more money than I'd ever seen and, you know, great opportunity.

And, you know, I called Veres like, man, they're going to give us, you know, 600,000. and we get to fight on, you know, HBO and this and that or showtime. And he said, no, no. He said, hold on. He said, I understand that, you know, if we say no to this, internally there's going to be some blowback. But he said, you know, when we fight these guys, I want you to be a full grown man. And I want you to destroy him. Like, I don't want, you know, I don't want you to be barely winning or barely eeked by.

And we did that like two or three times before the Super Six happened. And we get blowback. And some of the blowback spilled publicly where fans are saying, oh you know wards he's a gold medalist but he's moving too slow and that's the heat you take yeah that's the bulls that you have on your back coming in with a gold medal but in germany i really saw what the intent was you had mickle kessler who was mickle kessler at the time he's like 42 and 1 or something like that but like i don't know how many knockouts he had more knockouts than i have fights you had k who was from the uk and you had arthur abraham and then you had

three americans jermaine taylor who was teetering He was still relevant, but he was teetering on kind of being done. You had the young guy, Andre DeRale, and then you have the other young guy and myself. And I could tell that everybody that was there, they just looked at us like we were just a token just to be there. These guys are making interesting. Some namesake, young guys coming up. But these guys, these are the guys that are supposed to win. Yes.

And I took exception to that. To the personal. I took exception to that. And I got on the phone. I called very. I said, man, they don't, they don't really expect me to win this. He said, oh, yeah, I know. He said, it's always been like that.

He said, but just watch. Unwavering faith. He's always that pillar. And, again, that jumped off on me. It's already confident, but now it was personal. Now it was personal. Your physiology changes so dramatically. You go into your Virgil thing.

You can see it, man. You can see it. You can see it. You can see it. And at that time, Kessler and Frotch were like rock stars in their various countries, too. Right. They were big names in the time. I don't blame anybody for not picking us.

Like, I probably wouldn't have picked me. I was a young guy. Yeah, I had the gold medal. But I hadn't done anything as a pro. My biggest win was a guy named Edison Miranda, who was a beast. He was a top contender, right? That was my biggest win as a professional. So I don't blame anybody for not picking me, but I was also going to use that as fuel in that ammunition as well.

I was going to use it. So he goes on to win that like he wins everything else. This is the other thing you said through. I just want to hear everybody, everyone just. hear things I hear that I think are important. I do think that there are times in your life where if you don't jump on an opportunity, you will regret it the rest of your life.

That there is timing to when you win. There are moments. And you've said this a few times where Virgil said this to you. And for a lot of you that are chasing, you may get fatigued to that chase, but there's got to be this party that goes, if I don't jump on this now,

this may never come again for me. So your timing is so critical on. Winning the Super 6 tournament was a huge catalyst. Let's talk some boxing stuff just for me. Because I want to know some stuff. I'm curious. I told you I was going to ask you this, and you haven't told me the answer, so I'm curious. Forget the training part just for a second.

We're going to get to that. You are getting wrapped. You're about to go out for a big fight. You're getting wrapped up. I'm sure Virgil's talking to you. You're going through whatever your game plan was. What goes through you? Is there honest emotions here as a fighter?

See, the thing about boxing to me is that it's different than every other sport. UFC has some of this as well, but the combat sports. this is a man and a man I think people forget this like even when you bat as a baseball hitter there's another dude coming up after you if you ground out the other dude could get the hit right this is a man and a man

and I'm just curious when you have that happening you're getting look at your physiology changed again right but I'm just curious like when you're getting wrapped at that moment what's going through you emotionally what's happening to you at that time that moment can break a lot of men

you can have a great training can everything could be clicking you could have a great fight week leading up to that moment and that moment as well as the walk to the ring you can lose it like you can lose your confidence you can live fear overtake you and you can somehow convince yourself that you're not worthy to be there in that moment it's almost like an out-of-body experience you hear people say you know a guy froze or you know he didn't he didn't perform or it was a deer in the headlights like that's what they're talking about like you have it's almost like a surreal moment like this this moment that

you've been prepping for talking about building up to the world has been talking about like it's here and the fact that it's actually here like it hits you in a in a in a different kind of way like you're getting wrapped and you have the commission from whatever state you're fighting they're coming in they're checking on you they're giving you the countdown we got 45 minutes we got 30 minutes we got 20 then they come back in after you get your your gloves back on and they and they say we got five minutes. We're walking in two and a half minutes. And they start to count you down, like whether you train good or not. That's running through your brain. Thinking about my wife and my kids. I'm thinking about the fact that the whole world is literally going to be watching me

in just a few moments. Thinking about my critics, they got a front row seat. They got a front row seat. thinking about my supporters and the people that are riding with me getting behind me they got a front row seat they're watching they're pulling for me it's like this like this control chaos that's going on and it's literally an arena it's a it's a with two gladiators getting ready to literally risk at all like boxing is the only sport professional sport that I know of that one loss can change your pay scale like it's in the contract if you lose a fight, your minimums can change. We can renegotiate those minimums. Like, that's what's going through my head. Wow. And fear is very real. Really?

Anxiety is very real. It's very present. And all the guys that say, I don't get nervous. Yeah. I'm iron, man. They're not being honest. That's right. Like, that's very, very present.

But that's where my faith, New Year is, comes in. And I start to believe beyond myself. I start to believe beyond the way that I'm feeling. Like, we're called to walk by faith and not by sight. We're called to walk by faith and not by feeling. So fear is present, the courage is going in the midst of fear. And I've had 32 fights before I retired.

I had to do that every single time. It's not like, oh, this is the 25th time I've done this. It's easy. Because one punch. can change your pace scale. One punch can change your life. And you're not guaranteed to walk out the same way you walked in. So all of that is going through your mind, running through your body,

and you've got to channel it. You got to process it. And you've got to believe and you've got to be unwavering. And one thing I would always do was I would kind of just pace the locker room. And even though my team's in there, even though the commissioner's coming in and out. And again, this like controlled chaos. Television cameras are in your face. producers are walking around you hear the crowd you hear the announcer I would just

talk to myself it's my night it's my night I'm not going home without my belts like those types of things they may seem corny to some people but that stuff would really lift me up and because a made-up mind is a hard thing to break and your mind has to be made up not walking to the ring or when you step through those ropes your mind has to be made up up before you leave that locker room that I'm not going to be broken. I will not lose tonight. Oh my gosh. You ever get, uh, you ever get there where you're at the stair down and look at a dude to know you got him? Has that ever happened? Or is it on a professional level you just don't

know? Has it ever happened to reverse where you're in that state, you're in that faith state, you're in that strong state and you've looked, you're like, oh, I got this fool. Does that ever happened? You don't have to tell me who? Most times no. Because as fighters, we can lie. Yeah, yeah. We're good camillians. Because in a sport of boxing, if you show weakness,

the opponent's going to pounce. So we hide a lot of our emotions. You know, you got some guys that are scared of death, and they'll put a mask on. There's one time, one time in a 32 fight career that I knew I had a guy

at the way in. Chad Dawson. You knew. And you even told me who it was. And by the way, Chad Dawson was a great fighter, but you knew. How did you know?

Why did you know? He. So you get a lot of rumors and you hear a lot of hearsay in training camp. Yeah. This guy, you know, they'll call my coach. And I stayed away from that stuff. But my coach always had his ear to what was going on with my opponent. And he would decide on what he wanted to share and what he wouldn't want to share.

The guy Edison Miranda that I just told you about, he was sparring with Chad Dawson to help Chad Dawson get ready for our fight. Big fight, Chad Dawson was the linealineal light. heavyweight champion had just beat the great legendary Bernard Hopkins. South ball. The fight before, yes, tall, rangy. He beat Bernard Hopkins. He's on HBO. Max Kellerman asked him, you know, Chad, what do you want next?

I mind in my own business. He calls my name, I just won the Super Six. He said, I want Andre Ward. He said, I'll fight him in his hometown of Oakland, California. And I go down to his weight too. I say, really? And I like Chad. Like, I supported Chad and didn't see that coming.

That was like the easiest fight that we ever negotiated right there. And I held him to every single word that he spoke. Every word. Come in my weight, my place. So they get in the training camp, and because he's losing so much weight, his punch resistance isn't there. Edison Miranda can crack. Edison Miranda knocks him out and sparring. It was sparring.

Stuff starts to circulate. Verge comes to him, he said, listen, babe. He said, call me bait. Listen, babe, I'm not saying this to get you off track. We got to stay focused. We're probably about two and a half, maybe three weeks away from the fight. Maybe about two and a half. He said, I'm hearing some things, man.

I'm hearing that Edison Miranda. He knocked Chad out. He said, knocked him out. He said, knocked him out. Like, they had to stop the sparring, help him up, and that was it for the day. Now, if you're a fighter, like, that's like the worst case scenario. It's one thing if you get knocked out in a fight. You've got small gloves on, no head gear.

It happens. That's acceptable in some reason. respects. In sparring? No, not if you're the top dude. There may be a sparring partner getting knocked out, but not the top guy, not the champion. That was a no-no. We started hearing rumors, some kind of process. I'm like, man, he got knocked down. Man, that's crazy. But in my mind, I'm always very much in my head, especially in training camps. So I'm like, ah, maybe they're just floating out there to get in my head or trying to get me off track. And that's what Verbs. They said, but don't, don't, you know, don't worry about it too much. Just, you know,

stay focused. We kept hearing stuff, kept hearing stuff. Nothing ever went on that. airways, nothing, nothing on the internet, nothing. Press conference came, the week of the fight. I'm thinking, man, I wonder if they're going to say something. So rumor going to come out. If I'm going to be asked about it, it's never asked about it. The way in comes. Friday, the fight Saturday. I said, now I'm going to drop it on him. Now I'm going to drop it on it. We go face to face and his team, they're over there woofing. My team's kind of woofing a little bit. and I leaned in his ear and I said, hey man, I heard what happened in that gym. I said, you better tighten it up tomorrow night.

And you just see his shoulders just go. And he's got this look on his face like, how did you know? I won the fight with Chad Dawson right there. Oh, my gosh. We turned and look at the cameras, turn back and look at him before I walk off the stage. I broke him. You just knew. Broke him.

That is an awesome story. He thought he got away with it. We didn't know it. It's too late. You can't get out of the phone now. That is awesome, man. So that was the only time I ever felt like I want to fight when I didn't face off. Thank you for all of that insight of that and what it's like getting wrapped.

I don't know if I've ever told that story before. That's awesome. Well, we're keeping it in whether you want to or not. I'm keeping that one in there. No, we do too much. That was a great conversation. And if you want to hear the full interview, be sure to follow the Ed Mylett show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes.

Here's an excerpt I did with our next guest. Welcome back to Max Out, everybody. I'm so honored and blessed to have this man in my left here today. He just came on my radar very recently, and God is so good because I immediately fell in love with this man and his message through social media, through YouTube.

And within about a week of me discovering who he was, unbelievably, his name came across my desk with an opportunity to have a conversation with him today. And I think he's one of the most unique and influential people that I've ever heard from as a man. And it's really an honor to have you here today. He's an author, he's a speaker, he's a coach. But what he does is he really impacts people's lives, particularly men, but you women today that are listening to this or watching this, you get to listen in on a conversation.

I think it'll help you understand your man, your son, your potential boyfriend or your husband even better today. So Jason Wilson, thank you for being here. That's a pleasure. Thanks, I appreciate it. It's my honor. You're so soft-spoken and gentle. You're such a big, strong man. Is this new, is this a different you? In other words, even the way that you speak, there's a cadence.

You've got to be aware of this. I have no idea. There's a cadence. There's a cadence. There's an ease. There's a pace to it. I'm curious if, or maybe you don't even know, was, if I met you 20 years ago, was there, did that exist? Was this always your disposition, so to speak?

Or is your disposition changed as you've been willing to share with yourself all of the emotions that a man should be experiencing? I've changed. I have to ask, I would like to ask her. Let's ask her. What you think? He's changed. Even his daughter's here, she's off camera, guys, but I'm curious. Even his disposition, because I've noticed that with myself, I've listened to audios of me 20 years ago.

I still have a deep voice. I'm still aggressive. I still talk quickly, but there was an edge and an aggression to even the way I spoke. That is somewhat different now. And Alexis, you see that. Absolutely. Yes, he has this whisper. Okay.

But that wasn't there. that wasn't there. It wasn't. To your point, it has developed as he's developed. I got it. Okay. Even if you can't slow down. Yep.

So those of you that can't hear Alexis, she's saying that he slows down, even the way that he speaks, is much different as he's changed. And I think that's an external manifestation of something that's happened internally within you. It's very noticeable with you. That's interesting. It's one of the things I noticed right away with you was that there's this strong man, visually, very strong man who is frankly strong enough to communicate in a very gentle and kind way that's

pleasant to be with it's not it's not off-putting to be with and i just think all of you should know that over time i think jason's an example of just subtle changes you may not even know but your daughter knows sitting here change within you i had no idea you say cadence i'm like what you're talking about riding a bike yeah it's the way that you're well it's welcoming it'll it allows someone to sit with you and be present themselves. Awesome. And I think when people become more vulnerable in the way they express themselves, it almost gives you permission in their presence to be that way.

So the, and the reason I say this is it's just dawning on me, is that I have a son who's a kind young man. He's a gentle, pretty strong, much bigger than me, much stronger. But I'd like to think that maybe a little bit of that is because he was fortunate enough that the former me isn't the one that raised him. And for the most part, it was a guy who had done some of this work that raised him. And I just think it gives people permission to be in your presence. I want to share something with you and then ask you about it because I see this all over you.

We have them more in common than you might think. And that when my left, I played baseball when I was done playing college, I was unemployed, just living at my parents' house. My dad gets sober. He goes to his first AA meeting. My dad gets sober. Comes back from the first meeting, he says, I got you a job. Turns out it was an orphanage. It was a boy's home, a big one, though.

My boys were all removed from their homes. their parents were incarcerated or dead. But what I discovered by working with these boys, I was their big brother. I took them to school. I was there when they opened presents on Christmas Day, you know, took them trick or treating. I was there when they got in a fight at school or broke up with their girlfriend or whatever it was. People always ask me, what do these boys want from you?

And what I found from them was they wanted me to love them. They wanted someone to love them, care about them, believe in them, and maybe just show them how to live a little bit better. And as I got older and I got into business, people said, why did you have some success in business? Because that's what everybody wants. All people want you to love them. They want you to care about them. They want you to believe in them.

They want you to show them how to do a little better or help them. And I find that that's your overall, if I distilled down your message, the reason I agree with it and love it so much is it appears to me that that's what you do. You know, I'm glad you said that because when I first started the cave of Adelham for boys, it was just Marry. martial arts and discipline. Because although I rather, I always tell me in the reset to the lamb, no one wants to be in fight or flight response the whole time. You gotta be tough and mean mugging the whole time. Can I go there?

Absolutely. But if I could stay a majority of time here, this is where I want to be. When I start working with the boys and I was different, I was a different guy then. I was all about structure, discipline, toughness, fortitude. And I still am. Yes. However, I want you to be comprehensive. camp programs were very popular and scared straight programs were popular where you would take

kids into school into prisons yeah and to get them scared enough to say hey i don't want to act up ever again i discovered quickly man that re-traumatizing someone never heals the trauma needed experience boot camp's program started failing in alarming rates and i started shifting i went from just a discipline program to a place where it's a safe space And then I discovered that our boys didn't need more discipline. They needed more love. Yeah. As soon as I gave them that, you know, our first program was in Highland Park, Michigan,

if I was late, these boys, I'm talking about tough kids, they were sweeping clean the room, everything, moved the desk out, and they would sit there purposefully so that I could see them and say, wow, that's great. You guys didn't know, they just wanted the affirmation, they wanted to love. Yeah. That's why they act out. And that's what I give them. what I longed for. I'm literally, I became what I wanted. And that's what, that's what it is.

It's no secret. I became a man who's strong but sensitive, who's compassionate but caring, someone who can encourage you when you need to push through some pain, but also encourage you to express sorrow. We need to apologize to someone. Or feel the grief so that you can do something to transform someone's life. If you're only, you're stuck in just masculine attributes, you can see something wrong, but you say, no, I'm feeling something different. I ain't going to, I won't be a man, so they shy away from that. So true. When we change as men, I say this and I didn't say, you said it didn't say this, this world will change. You're right. When we can change, like really become comprehensive, misogynistic behavior, I can go down in the line, will change.

And that's inside working from the inside out. Very short intermission here, folks. I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far. Don't forget to follow the show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. Welcome back to Max Out, everybody. I'm fired up about today's topic

because we're going to talk about one of the things that I think is the most important things as it relates to winning. And it's one of the things that you can decide you're going to do without any natural giftedness because it's the number one talent you must develop in order to win. and it's not talked about on social media,

you're not going to get it in a personal development tape and a peak performance program, self-help and any of it. Remember this. The best ability is availability. Did you hear that? The best ability is availability, that you are available to win.

Not enough people understand that this is an actual skill and talent. Most people in business or in life, whether it be relationships or the financial part of their life, they're always looking for these little tips and skills that you should develop, how to communicate better, how to be a better listener, how to suppress your ego, how to influence people, how to transfer energy,

all these things that I teach, how to deal with failure. But I believe the greatest talent that you can draw a line through all the people who have won. Not all the people that went in business or life are unbelievable transfers of energy. Not all of them can close. Not all of them can persuade. Not all of them are great listeners. Not all of them even dealt well with adversity. They did that the majority of the time. But all of them have in common, they develop the talent. And yes, It is a talent. It is a skill of not quitting. I don't think most of you right now that are struggling in your business life right now are giving yourself enough credit for this incredible talent you're developing, which is resiliency, which is the ability not to quit. Listen to what I'm

telling you is somebody has built multiple different companies. I've coached some of the top athletes, entertainers, business people, and politicians in the world. And I'm telling you that even in my own team when I hire people, I look for resiliency and a notch above that is the talent is the skill of not quitting as the number one thing that I look for. And many of you right now listening to this possess the number one skill necessary to win and don't give yourself any credit for it, which means it's not helping build your confidence. It's not going to the bank of crediting for your identity. And so although you possess this incredible ability that so many people in the world don't have and don't possess, you have it and you don't value it, you don't

prize it, you don't give yourself credit for having it. It ought to be where you draw the majority of your confidence from, the ability to say, I don't quit, I'm resilient, I own the number one skill, the number one talent required to eventually win, I already have. I can't quit. You'd have to kill me to get me out of chasing my dream, right? So number one, I want to point it out as the number one gift. The best ability is availability. Do you have it? Have you decided to have it? Is it something you're going to possess the rest of your life? And those of you that do have it already, I need you to take an inventory, be aware of it, and be intentional with crediting yourself as you're listening to this or watching it today into the bank of your self-confidence, into the

bank, into the deposits you make in your identity because it has everything to do with winning. Every guest you've seen on my show, all the people that I've coached all have different talent, skills, and abilities. What's the one they all have? The ability to stay present. The ability to stay in the fight, to have not quit. You'd think, well, that's not a big deal. Really? Because as I've been talking, millions of people made the decision to quit on their dream, just as I've been talking to you. The rest of the day, millions more will. Tomorrow millions more. Every day, literally millions of people quit on one of their dreams, their dream relationship, their dream business, their dream body. So quitting has become the number one habit in the world by people that end up losing. And I'm telling you what happens every day, every second, everywhere. Just the fact that while I've been speaking, you're still after your dream. You're ahead of them. You

Don't give yourself enough credit because eventually what I found, it looks like winnings this huge competition. But every day, every week, every year, every decade as time goes by, you're going to find that you're competing with a smaller and smaller and smaller group of people for your dream because so many of them will just quit. And by the way, many of them that quit will possess talents, maybe even gifts you don't have. They're incredible ability with people. They're incredible strength.

They're incredible brain. And they'll quit with all this gift for. but you got the talent. You have to learn to distinguish between something that is a talent and a gift. You can develop skills. You can develop talents. Gifts are something you're born with, but the people that I see that win long term are the ones who develop the talents and skills required to win. Business and life's a lot like a pinata. You know, I was at a barbecue, a birthday party for a five-year-old a while back, and they did a pinata. I've seen the pinata before, and it's an unbelievable metaphor for life. In fact, we had a call today, life is like a pinata.

because it really is. If you look at these kids at these parties, any of you that ever been to a pinata, you can picture it. They got the pinata up there. And what do they do? It's just like in business and life, when you start something new,

a new relationship, a new body, a new pursuit, a new business, right? What do they do? They take this little five-year-old and they blindfold them. They blindfold this little guy, right? And he can't see. He doesn't know where he's going.

And then they spin him around. He gets completely disoriented, right? And then they hand him a bat. It's scary when you watch it. Don't you? Picture these little kids. right you blindfold them they spin them around they become disoriented does that sound familiar to any of you that are trying to build a business right now you're

completely disoriented you're blind you don't know where to go they spin this little guy around they hand him a bat and they go hit the pinata and the pinata and the pinata's over to the right they're swinging to the left they're just whiffing right they're not even in the right direction and then finally what do you do you grab the little guy or the little girl and you turn them and you have them face the pinata they were completely disoriented in fact they were doing more damage to the people around them in the beginning with that darn bat you gave them because

they're so disoriented. A lot of damage was done before they even faced the actual pinata. They've been blindfolded and spun around, right? They're completely disoriented. Doesn't that sound familiar? It's just like building your new business. It's just like trying to transform your body. It might be just like this brand new relationship you've got. And in fact, the people around them are in danger in the beginning when you give these little guys this bat. Maybe that sounds familiar. Maybe right now you're at this stage in your business or you've been there before where there's been more damage done than there's been progress. You know what I'm talking to me? up the people around you have been more hurt by your new venture than benefited from it your

relationship with them's not as good maybe financially you've hurt them or feel like you have there's been a lot of damage but what do we do with these little guys we eventually take the little girl little boy and we point them in the right direction at the pinata that's when you find Edmielette's podcast you find his teachings you find his YouTube channel or someone like me and I can point you in the right direction and then what do these guys do they take the bat and they're hitting the pinata as hard as they can and they're hitting it and they're hitting it and they're it and no candy comes out and they get tired don't they and they just they can't go anymore so what do you do you get help and you add a teammate you add a friend

you take the blindfold off of you and you get a little help that help could be a new recruit in your business a new employee a new vendor it might be a new mentor and we put the blindfold on them we spin them around and then they're disoriented they're swinging and they're not even hitting the pinata yet they're they're hurting the people around them then what we do we take them we point them in the right direction now they're following my show or great teachings. And they hit the pinata as hard as they can. No candy comes out. You take another child, new teammate, new recruit in life, right? But in the pinata says another child, you put a

blindfold, spin them around, and they hit the pinata. And they're hitting it as hard as they can. And it feels like no progress is being made. No candy's coming out, right? And eventually they're getting it and hitting it and they get tired. And you think, man, how often they get this pinata. What happens is sometimes the first few kids who hit the pinata, they kind of disappear from the party and start playing somewhere else. Maybe you've had that experience in your business. Some of the people you start with, they may not finish before the candy comes out.

They may not be there. They may not be there to celebrate. Some of the initial people disappear, and that could cause you to want to quit. But eventually what happens with that pinata? Even though these kids are hitting the pinata and they're teaming up, they're all working together to try to make this candy come out,

it doesn't look like it, but each shot on that pinata is putting them closer to the candy. Even though it doesn't seem like it, even though you can't see the candy, every blow is like a compound pounding effect. That pounding compounded by multiple people eventually can create a breakthrough. But what most people do is they leave the party before the candy comes out. That's true in business.

Most people quit before the candy comes out. They don't stick around long enough. They got spun around. They get disoriented. They might hurt the people around. They get pointed in the right direction. They think they're making progress. Then they don't.

They think they're making progress. then they don't. And eventually, because no candy's coming out, no money, no change body, no amazing relationship, they stop swinging the bat at the pinata. But if you stick around for the party long enough, you know what always happens with the pinata? Eventually someone hits it and bam, the candy comes out everywhere and everyone celebrates and gets all the candy and dives on it and celebrates. Here's what I'm here to remind you of today. You've got to stick around long enough for the candy to come out. You've got to wait for the candy to come out of that piece. Penaata called your life, called your business, called your body, called your relationships.

The vast majority of people in life don't stick around for the candy because they think as they're hitting the pinata of their life, they don't think they're making progress. It doesn't feel like progress. But I'm telling you the number one ability is availability. And if you keep swinging away every day, even though it doesn't feel like it, you are getting closer to the candy. You're getting closer. It just doesn't feel like it.

You know what I had? I had the ability to keep hitting the pinata in my life to stick around long enough. And by the way, when you eventually win, it's not just you that gets all the candy, that gets all the victory, that gets all the money, lots of people around you, many of which who you were hurting originally with that bat, many of them who were trying to talk you out of it, they get to celebrate in the candy too. My prayer for you is that you begin to think about this analogy, the pinata of your life, the pinata of your business,

The pinata of your body is you're swinging away. I'm here to tell you, even though it doesn't feel like it, you're getting closer to the candy. And if you can add more people to celebrate, it's okay that you feel disoriented. It's okay that it feels blinding and you don't know exactly what direction to go, just like these precious babies with the pinata. It's okay that you miss it once in a while. It's okay that you get tired once in a while. But as long as you keep after it and you keep pounding away, that compound effort of your pounding, I can promise you there's candy. someday and everybody around you will jump on it and celebrate. That's my wish for you. Today,

as you listen to me, of all the skills I'm going to teach you, that I've taught you. And if you've not listened to my other shows, I teach you about listening, transfer energy, how to close, how to change your identity, how to live blissfully dissatisfied, how to unlock your success code, all of the very detailed things I teach. Today is the most important thing is that as you learn all these skills, it'll help you with the blindness, every single skill you learn, You'll see clearer and clearer and clearer. But if you don't develop the talent, the number one skill in the world, which is to keep hitting the pinata and to stick around until the candy comes out,

because here's the deal. Someone's going to get the candy in life. There's always candy in life. That pinata eventually always breaks down. Do you want to be the person who was there in the beginning, hitting as hard as you could and sacrifice it and maybe hurting the people around you and never get the candy? Or are you going to get something for your pain? Are you going to get something for your effort?

Are you going to get something for this sacrifice you're making? You've got to get something for this pain. You've got to stick in the game until the candy comes out, and then we all get to celebrate. That's what I want you focused on today. I promise you there's a pinata in your life, and right now many of you feel blind and disoriented, maybe even hurting the people around you.

Some of you are past that phase, and you're hitting your thing hard every day, but there's no candy yet. I promise you there's going to be a payoff for you. Very short intermission here, folks. I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far. forget to follow the show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. Now on to our next guest. Welcome back to Max Out, everybody. Today's awesome. I just reached out to this man. I said,

hey, brother, I think the world needs a little bit more of Dean and Ed. And everywhere I go, people bring up the time that we've spent together on our other show as one of their favorite, if not their favorite show that I've ever done. And this man here is a friend of mine. But beyond that, I just want you know, he's an incredibly financially successful person. We were just talking about some of the great things happening his life off camera. I think he's one of the most articulate and brilliant people in all of the entrepreneur, life strategy, personal development space. And he approaches it in a way that's different than everybody else.

There's a kindness that exudes out of this man, a gentleness yet strength that no one else has. He's also somebody that many of the other people in the space go to for personal advice and for counsel. He's just a good man. He's a great husband. He's a wonderful father. And I count him as a friend and somebody that I admire greatly. So Dean Gratiosi, thank you for being here today, brother.

Thank you for that beautiful introduction. I feel the same way about you, Ed. We met each other a little bit before the podcast, and it was like we were bonded brothers forever after that. And it was a great show, and I still get hit up on a regular basis. I know you do. There was something magical about that show because we get hit up all the time about it. So it's good to be here with you.

One thing that's a lot of people are listening to this, and they know they've got that thing. They're not working out like they should. Maybe they are in that text thing. Maybe it's that they don't eat the way they should. They don't make the context. They should. They're not up as early.

They got a thing. But they're winning in spite of it, right? In spite of it, they've got some winning going on. Because in spite of the fact, for many years, Dean, that you weren't as congruent as you wanted to be. You were still producing financial success. Massively. Massively.

But what's happened, the last four or five years is your life has become a freaking rocket ship in terms of influence, re. You guys, Dean's been famous a long time. You go back to all the infomercial days. If you're, if you've not seen Dean or you hear this voice, it's because Dean was all over television forever, very successful in that space and the influence space, the real estate space,

as he was not congruent in every area of his life. But man, the last four or five years. So speak to that. If you can solve that thing you got, it's like a football team who's got no running game. Man, if they could just run the football, they've already got a good passing game. Their defense is good.

They're a playoff team already. But if they could run the football, they're going to win the Super Bowl. There's always that thing, right? True or false? So, okay, I love this question. And I love hanging out with you, man. And thank you for everybody listening. I know you have lots of options.

So thanks for hanging out with two friends talking about stuff where I had no idea what we were talking about. So this is really cool. Here's what I know. What happens sometimes? I'll tell you what I did for a decade. If we're going to talk about relationships, I'll be completely transparent. I thought about leaving my relationship every day. of my life for five years. It was almost the first thing I thought about every day, not because

she's a bad human in any way. It just wasn't the right fit. I'm not an advocate of divorce, but it just didn't fit. But here's what I did for years. I was financially successful. At the time I thought I was the best dad possible, even though I wasn't showing them the best example, but I thought I'm an engaged father. I coach little league coach softball. I'm there. I bring them to school, make them lunches, love them the death. I'm a great leader to my team. I'm a friend to people who need me. So my relationships off and I'm not congruent. I should be freaking fortunate. So who gets it all? This is what I remember to who. Oh, you want it all, Dean. You want love and congruency and a good dad and financially free. And I remember just thinking

stop being greedy. If your relationship doesn't work. But really what I was doing it is I wasn't facing something because it was scary to me. It was scary leaving my kids and not thinking Thinking and not being with my kids every single day was like a shot in the gut. And I just ignored it and avoided it. And it grew. It grew to where I didn't become the man that I was supposed to be.

Listen, whatever you believe in God, the universe, I believe in God, and I believe God has created you to be bigger, better, and stronger than you currently are. No matter where you are in your life, God wants you to be the woman you were meant to be, the man you were meant to be. And if you believe in karma, whatever your beliefs are, you're meant to be more.

And when you let one of those areas build, it doesn't go away. I don't care how much I try to push it down on the inside. It just kept growing. And you feel that you, like you're looking away from it, even though it's there. And I want you to think about this. When you have to, some things are difficult,

you might have to face a change of a business, a change of a business partner, change of a job, change in a relationship. The thing that you've been avoiding is growing even though you think it's not. And it's like got roots and the roots are creeping over into all areas of your life and you don't know and you're working harder, stronger, faster

to overcome this and you think you're conquering it if you're in a relationship that's not good and maybe you go to the strip club or you text on your phone or you do something and you think you're fulfilling it, you're not, you're just letting the roots grow in deeper and stronger and you're working twice as hard to be successful and you don't even realize it.

And here's the way I looked at it. When I decided or we decided to get a divorce and you can use this analogy, could tell I got some silly analogies. You can use this in any area of your life. Picture your ship is in a bay. It's calm. The water's calm. There's other great ships in the bay. The weather's kind of beautiful. It's kind of nice. But you know you're not meant to be in that bay. But man, it just has all the signs where you're supposed to be there. But the only way out of that bay is you've got to sail your ship through the storm that's out in the ocean

and you're watching the storm and you're watching how turbulent it is. You're in the bay and it's comfortable, but the only way to your next level, the only way to break through, the only way to get rid of those roots to kind of crush that thing that's you're avoiding or afraid of is you got to sail your ship through the storm. You see the storm, it's turbulent, the waves are high, the sky is dark, and you're not even sure because you've never navigated that territory. You don't have a map because you've never been there. You've never experienced it. And the way I looked at it when I was going through a divorce is I was so scared of for my kids, not me being alone, but scared on how that would work out with my kids, that a lot of times I put my ship in the

storm, it got bumping, I went back to the bay. And I'll tell you, when I finally said, I can't be the man I'm supposed to be staying in this harbor, even though it's pretty and there's great people around, and it's going through that storm, going through the changes, the navigating of new territory. You're mapping out new territory on the fly, and your ship's going down and you want to turn back a hundred times. But there's this moment, and it happened to me. when I went through a divorce. There was this moment where I didn't know if I could take it and I was scared for my kids and I was having anxiety attacks. But I want to share with you, there was this moment that my ship landed on the other side of the storm. And it was over.

And I was a different human. I was a different man. I looked through a different lens. I had a new map and I realized I wasn't meant for that other bay. Yes, it was safe. Yes, it was okay. But listen, at the end of our lives, do we want to be okay? Right? And when I I got to the other side, it was this fresh start. I found a way to be friends with my ex. I found away for my kids to be safe. I found a way to replace quantity with quality with my children. I found a way to be a better version of me and attract Lisa in my life. And when those roots were gone, this is what I want to share with all of you for that one area of your life that you know what I'm talking about. As you're hearing this, you're picturing it. And you're going, wow,

nobody really knows that I do that when no one's watching. Nobody knows that I'd like to fix that no one knows that I kind of BS everybody else and say I'm working on it but I'm not. I want to tell you when they go away, your sailboat turns into a ship with five engines on it. Like my life exponentially grew. I became a better dad, a better leader, a better friend.

I had more compassion, had more empathy. I replaced anger with compassion. And things just, I just became a different person. I mean, I think I was a good man 10 years ago, but I wouldn't recognize him. I'm not the same human today. and that allowed me to go faster. And I just encourage you, you've heard this before,

but your next level lives on the other side of the thing you're avoiding, the other thing you're afraid of. And Ed, I think I heard you say this. You know, all of us, we get to learn from each other and listen to each other, and I'll go listen to a podcast. When I need a little, I'll listen to a little Ed my led or watch it. But I remember somebody saying it may have been you, may have been you.

But what drives me to fix those pieces, guys? I want you to hear this, the business that you want to scale, start, the relationship you want to fix or end, the parenting style that you've gone so long doing it one way, you think it's too late and you've got to fight for it, it's worth the fight. Whatever it is the fight, I just want to tell you, I picture, I've always pictured being at the end of my life and having a conversation with God. And he said, how did it go? Right? Always picture that. And I always have the fear of going, well, you know, I was in a good relationship, right? Or things were okay. You know, I was great at my business, at impacting lives and I did this and I was a good dad. What about your relationship? It was okay.

Like I picture saying that to someone where we have this creation given to us, this opportunity and I feel like this inner disappointment where I'd want to scream and go, you know what? Damn it, can I do that over? And you don't get that chance. You don't get that chance. Like you don't get a do-over and you'd want to.

So I put those emotions of my future back on me. Things you've, again, already heard. And I think I've heard this from you, Ed, or someone, but I heard someone put that on a whole other level. that on a whole other level. Could you imagine if God pulled out his iPhone and said, Ed, I appreciate all you've done and you've served and you give in that one area of life. Can I play you a quick video of the man you could have been? That's my stuff. Yeah. That is yours. I knew I heard that from you. When I heard that from you, Ed, it honestly took what I had been,

I had been telling myself my last conversation with God. And when I heard that from you, I've shared that and I feel that all the time. And if I didn't, I want to to share this with you guys and I hope it's relating to where you are in your life right now if you're looking for what's going to drive you what's going to take you to the next level how do you move your lighthouse out how do you wake up compelled again not just want to chill and how do you find that that that thrive that that energy that zest for life again I just want to share with you that if I didn't sail my ship out of that harbor that safe harbor and go through I'm not I'm I'm understating what I went through for I don't take aspirin

when I was going through a divorce worrying about my kids I was popping Xanax three days a week because I couldn't control my anxiety. I was drinking a glass of wine five nights a week because I couldn't put myself to sleep. So I'm, I'm understating how bad I was for a short period of time. When I was in the middle of that storm, I thought of turning back because I felt so crappy about myself and worried about my kids so much. But I want to tell you on the other side, I never would have experienced what real love could be like. I have love in a way that I wish it for every single one of you. There's nothing I can even share that compares to having a true soulmate that's got your back that support you and loves you and you feel the same

where you don't keep score and you got each other's back, I never would have experienced that if I didn't go through the storm. And whatever that storm is for you, you have to have that compelling future and you have to say steadfast and realize if you go back to where you were, you'll get more of what you used to have. That was a great conversation. Be sure to follow the Edmyset show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. All right, welcome back to the show, everybody. So the man that we're going to talk with today is a very important man to me. There are not five people on planet Earth that I would rather speak to today than this young man.

And my dream list for people that would be on this podcast, he is at the very, very top of the list. Because he's a story of resiliency, faith, strength, comeback. And you all know his story. January 2nd, 2023, with about five minutes and 58 seconds left in the game against the Cincinnati Bengals. My dear friend here tackled wide receiver T. Higgins. He was running with the ball. He hit Demar and in the chest with his helmet. And Damar made the tackle, as he always does.

And he got up after that tackle, stood up for a second and then collapsed on the field. And in that moment, our country was captivated and literally, hundreds of millions of people were in prayer for this precious young man. I don't know that I've ever said this and meant it more. I am so grateful that you are here today. And welcome to the show, Damar Hamlin. Good to have you here, brother. And thanks for having me.

I appreciate, you know, the answer. You've talked to, you know, some of the biggest and the best across the world, you know. So to be in that, you know, top five actually wanted to talk to, it's, you know, it's an honor. So I'm glad to be here. glad to believe you know what i'm curious about is do you have any imposter syndrome about all this you know as my platform grew more and more people started listening to me you know i was like man if they knew how much of this stuff i'm still working on trying to figure out you know everyone's looking at me for advice and i'm i'm still trying to figure out this or that or the other thing and

it took me a while to accept that god will use my imperfections and the things i don't know and the fact that I'm more like most people than not to connect me with them, that I don't have to be, I don't have to have every answer. I don't have to know everything. I finally can, you know, dawned on me that it's okay, but all that I'm not perfect, you know, they don't have it all figured out. Is there any party that's like, God, why me? Like, I mean, I'm still, I'm in my mid-20s. I'm trying to figure all this stuff out myself. Is there, is there any part of you that feels that way, or do you just accept the anointing and the calling and you go with it? You know, maybe two times over this last year in two months, have I ever decided to, like, you know, let myself

have a feeling of why me, you know, it's natural, you know, it's super natural. And, you know, a lot of it came with football because I truly loved the game of football, you know, football was truly my piece away from the world. You know, I would go to practice. I would have so much going on in my personal life in college, like arguing with girlfriends and dealing with class and I'm probably arguing with my parents about something, just being a young college kid. Like my whole entire life is chaos. But I come to practice for these two and a half hours and I am at peace. I feel like I'm sitting at the beach listening to the waves, you know, while I'm at practice

because I truly love the process of getting better, you know, but to have that snatched away from you, you know, and then have the space where you truly had your peace and now you're facing your fears in that space and having to. to overcome that whole feeling, you know, it was, it was something that, you know, I, I really had to work for it, you know, but, you know, I only ask myself why I mean maybe two times in the whole time and then I will always just correct myself and, you know, I understand why, you know, I truly know that God seen me as somebody who was, you know, doing his work, you know, I was out here. And I don't, I don't mean to say that like I'm the most spiritual person in the world or, you know, like I don't remember the last time I showed up for church on a Sunday. You know what I mean? Just my personal life is busy. I have a lovely church that I do go to back at home in McKee's Rock, Pennsylvania.

But, you know, I don't remember the last time that I showed up the church on Sunday. So I don't want to even seem like I'm this perfect person or I was this perfect person, you know, that God just selected me because I was above all else. Like you said, I'm more like everybody than I'm not. But, you know, I was truly doing right by people. I clapped for others while I waited my turn. I learned from the people before me. I supported everyone. And I truly let my heart walk into every room before I did with no expectations in return.

You know, with no expectations in return. That's just because of how I was raised, you know. And I was truly a kid that, you know, I found God within my own personal life. You know what I mean? I grew up a Christian kid and I went to a Catholic high school, you know, and it was like, it was like, you know, within that journey, I had to figure out what this relationship meant to me. Through that process, you know, I truly developed my own relationship and I formatted all of the goals that I want to accomplish my life off of that relationship.

And, you know, I never asked my, I tried to never ask myself or let myself, you know, get the perspective of why me because I know why me, because I was doing the work and I was, I was, I was moving right by people. And, you know, who better than me? You know, and, you know, I don't want to take credit away from no one else, but, you know, I don't know if anyone would have, you know, been able to handle the situation like this. So, you know, just thinking about that.

Yeah. By the way, you're right. I did the other thing, you know, when you look at God's work in hindsight, it always usually kind of lines up once you look at it. The other thing that's really obvious to me tomorrow, I'll just tell you, is that God. chose somebody who could be a great communicator of this message. He chose a guy who's really good with words.

And not only are you good with words, but when you say things, there's an energy transfer, there's an impact, there's an emotion when you say things. That's rare. When someone's gifted with the athleticism you've been gifted with and clearly the IQ you've been gifted with, to also have the ability to communicate on the fly like you do is a very rare thing. And it's clear that I really believe that you were chosen for this. I just really do.

I have to tell you as a parent, I watched a conversation your mom had. Your mom was at the game and was trying to get to you, as I understand it. Is that correct? Yeah, she was it. My mom and my dad. Yeah. I'm just wondering, I asked you how it's affected you or changed you. What about how it's affected the people around you and their lives or even the way they interact with you?

I'm wondering, I mean, obviously the attention you got is crazy. every athlete and famous person in the world's talking about you all the time. But I've, you know, you know this. When you're a college player, it's one thing. You get to the NFL, the world changes around you a little bit, right? Like just the way the world responds to you is different. When you're not well known and then you're famous, when you're poor compared to when you're rich. So I have to imagine when you're alive and then you're not for a few minutes and then you're

alive again that the way the world treats you might change a little bit. Has it changed a little bit the way the world reacts to you? Yeah, definitely, man. You know, the first way is people are touched. Like, people are truly touched. And like, some people, like, people see me that just want to hug. Like, people see me, they want to, you know, tell me a little bit about their story or, you know, somebody that they know or how they were affected or some things that they're going through personally, you know. So people are touched in all kind of different ways. And, you know, even outside of the situation, people see. my mission. You know, people see the mission that I've been on even greater now, you know, and that's a part of, you know, the blessings because, you know, within my immediate family, nothing has changed. Like my mom, my dad, me, my brother, we're all still the same people. You know, like, this hasn't, my mom and dad, once I decided to play football again, they're like, okay, this is what we're doing. And this is what you decided to do. And we're 110% behind you.

You know, like whichever way it was, you know, they was going to be 110% behind me. You know, so my parents haven't changed the bit. They're on my back just like I wasn't called each. They're not, you know, they're not cutting me on the slack. They're not, you know, the expectations aren't different if I still come home. And, you know, I spend some time at my parents' house. I'm going to be taking out the trash doing dishes. I'm going to be back in the living room floor, like, you know.

So, you know, my immediate family. family, thank God, that, you know, everything is still the same there. But, you know, it has caused a little bit of trouble, you know, within, like, friendships and things like that to where, you know, some people feel obligated to, you know, be around me more. Or, you know, it's all over the place. I try to not focus on it. But, you know, when it's the personal people around you that you grew up with that you wanted to be spending the rest of your life with that you thought would be in your wedding, you know, it has a little bit of effect on you, you know. So, but, you know, the people that truly love me and love me with no expectation behind it are all still in my life.

They're all still the same people with me. And we're enjoying life. We all have a different perspective and a different appreciation for life for sure.