THE ED MYLETT SHOW - Turning Wounds into Strength: The Path to True Power with Jon Gordon

Episode Date: September 17, 2024

Before we jump into today's episode, I am personally inviting you to a once-in-a-lifetime, LIVE in-person event with me and my good friend Jon Gordon called, “A Day With Jon and Ed” on November 3...rd and 4th. This is not a conference. It’s an exclusive gathering of 75 top elite leaders, where you’ll be immersed in a full day of high-level learning and networking. You won’t want to miss this chance to experience a day of transformation. There are limited spots left, so secure yours now at adaywithjonanded.com. This week's episode is a taste of what you can expect from this amazing event... What if love, not fear, could be the ultimate driving force in your life? Today, I’m sitting down with one of the most respected voices in leadership and mindset, Jon Gordon. In this episode, we tackle a deep and transformative topic: Living a Purpose-Driven Life Fueled by Love. Jon opens up about his own personal struggles—battling fear, nearly losing his marriage, and facing career setbacks—and how making the shift to lead with love completely transformed his life and success. Jon shares his unique insights into the profound impact love can have on every area of your life, from business to relationships. We also dive into the three pillars of success that everyone needs: a mission, a team, and a scoreboard. These elements are the key to staying focused, motivated, and unstoppable in both life and business. In this episode, we cover: The Love vs. Fear Dynamic – Jon explains how fear holds you back and why choosing love is the ultimate game-changer. The 3 Pillars of Success – Learn the critical elements you need to create momentum and drive in your personal and professional life. Actionable Tools to Stay Mission-Driven – Discover how to align your actions with your purpose and lead with positivity. This isn’t just a discussion about mindset—it’s a blueprint for shifting how you approach your life, leadership, and relationships. If you’re ready to move from fear to love and unlock the next level of success, this episode is for you. Tune in and get ready to reignite your purpose! And don’t forget, join Jon and me for “A Day With Jon and Ed” on November 3rd and 4th for our exclusive leadership event. This will be an intimate experience where you’ll get to learn directly from us and other top-level leaders. Visit adaywithjonanded.com to claim your spot before it sells out. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript
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Starting point is 00:00:00 So hey guys, listen, we're all trying to get more productive and the question is, how do you find a way to get an edge? I'm a big believer that if you're getting mentoring or you're in an environment that causes growth, a growth based environment, that you're much more likely to grow and you're going to grow faster. And that's why I love Growth Day. Growth Day is an app that my friend Brendan Burchard has created that I'm a big fan of. Write this down, growthday.com forward slash ed. So if you want to be more productive, by the way the way he's asked me I post videos in there every single Monday that gets your day off to the right start he's got about five thousand ten thousand dollars worth of courses that are in there that come with the app also some of the top influencers in the world are all posting content and they're
Starting point is 00:00:37 on a regular basis like having the Avengers of personal development and business in one app and I'm honored that he asked me to be a part of it as well and contribute on a weekly basis, and I do. So go over there and get signed up. You're gonna get a free, tuition-free voucher to go to an event with Brendan and myself and a bunch of other influencers as well. So you get a free event out of it also.
Starting point is 00:00:53 So go to growthday.com forward slash ed. That's growthday.com forward slash ed. My dad works in B2B marketing. He came by my school for career day and said he was a big ROAS man. Then he told everyone how much he loved calculating his return on ad spend. My friend's still laughing at me to this day. Not everyone gets B2B, but with LinkedIn, you'll be able to reach people who do. Get a $100 credit on your next ad campaign. Go to linkedin.com slash results to claim your credit.
Starting point is 00:01:25 That's linkedin.com slash results. Terms and conditions apply. LinkedIn, the place to be, to be. I'm going back to university for $0 delivery fee, up to 5% off orders and 5% Uber cash back on rides. Not whatever you think university is for. Get Uber One for students. With deals this good, everyone wants to be a student.
Starting point is 00:01:43 Join for just $4.99 a month. Savings may vary. Eligibility and member terms apply. This is The Admired Show. Welcome back to the show, everybody. So today's going to be awesome for me, and I'm assuming it will be for you, because I have one of the most brilliant people on planet
Starting point is 00:02:04 Earth joining me today, one of the most brilliant people on planet Earth joining me today. One of the best men I've ever known in my life and truly a great friend of mine. And in just a short few years has become very, very close to me. And I think I'm pretty close to him. He's an expert on leadership. He's one of the most prolific authors in the world. Over the last two decades, he sold literally millions of books and it behind the scenes scenes he is a mentor to some of the most influential people in the world and every different industry and this man's handprint is all over leadership in this
Starting point is 00:02:34 country and across the world now and it's all over me and so it'll be all over you by the end of this hour. So my dear dear friend John Gordon, welcome back to the show brothers. So great to to have you Hey, good to be back And you know how much I love you respect you admire you and just thrilled to be back with you the last show we did On the one truth. I just got an email the other day about it and a text from another person saying this YouTube video because it's on YouTube now. Yeah change my life. Like they said this thing was Unbelievable and we talked about over a year and a half, maybe two years ago now. And it's still going out there.
Starting point is 00:03:09 That conversation we had about oneness and separateness. So powerful. It's so good. And we have to touch on that a little bit again today and go a little bit deeper. By the way, everybody, just kind of a teaser. John does something every year called a day with John and so and so. And that so and so this year is me. So John and I are doing a very exclusive event. I've never done this before. I'm only doing it because it's John and John's only done it one other time and so myself and John are doing an event November 3rd and 4th that
Starting point is 00:03:38 we'll tell you about in a little bit that I think you're gonna be very intrigued by. It's an immersive day. John Maxwell's joining us as well for a VIP dinner. It's gonna be a day like it's never happened in business or leadership sports ever, so stay tuned to hear a little bit about that. But we're not big on pushing stuff, so we'll wait a little while to tell you about it. So first things first, brother, I want to ask you about difficult conversations and I want to go into something specific if you're willing to talk about it. John's got a book out right now about that topic and it's one of the things you had
Starting point is 00:04:04 with me and I've watched you have it with other people. It's sort of a public thing now but you know John mentors some of the top college football coaches in the world. I don't think you'll mind me saying this and if you don't we'll cut it out but Lane Kiffin just came out recently and discussed a very difficult conversation series of conversations you had with Lane about changes he need to make and he basically attributed that conversation to vigorously and literally changing his life and those of you that may not know who Lane is, Lane is one of the most prolific college football coaches in the world right now his team's ranked fifth in the nation and he wasn't in such a
Starting point is 00:04:38 good spot when you had that so maybe talk about that situation but also the process of learning to have a difficult conversation with someone you care about or maybe even somebody like in that case you were just getting to know pretty well at the time. I tweeted something and Lane responded and said come to the FAU. So I went down to the FAU. I said I want to meet this guy. I didn't think I was going to like him. I said I want to meet him, see what he's all about. So what's the FAU, John? What is that? It's Florida Atlantic University. So it's where he was coaching at the time. Got it. He had worked for Nick Saban, got fired by Nick and had the opportunity now to become a head coach. And this was his opportunity to build something from the ground up as a head coach. This was a guy who was a coach with the
Starting point is 00:05:18 Raiders when he was like 30 years old, like one of the youngest NFL coaches of all time, also coach at Tennessee, was fired infamously from USC, was literally kicked off the plane by the AD. It was not a good moment for Lane. So I go down there thinking, I'm not gonna like this guy. And we start talking, I realize, oh, I like him, but man, he needs to clean up his act. Like he needs to do things differently. He was not engaged in great behaviors.
Starting point is 00:05:45 Let's just say that. And so I just said, hey, Lane, listen, if you wanna be a top coach in college, if you wanna be a power five coach, you can't be doing these things. I said, listen, if you don't want me to talk about this right now, I'll leave right now if you don't wanna talk about this.
Starting point is 00:06:01 I said, but if I'm gonna be here, I'm gonna tell you what's up. He said, no, stay. I need to hear it. Whoa, that blew me away. He said, stay, I need to hear. I saw the humility and I saw that he was willing to learn and grow and he wanted to get better.
Starting point is 00:06:17 It was a really special moment. And then we had a really honest, difficult conversation about what he needed to do to get better. Now, did it all happen immediately? No, but we began a friendship in that moment and I began speaking truth into his life. We talked about God, that he needed to get closer to God and you see his path over the years. You see how he stopped drinking. He started to have more responsible behavior. He got closer to
Starting point is 00:06:44 God. He's surrounded by a great chaplain now, FCA. He got hired at Ole Miss after having great success at FAU. And now this program is thriving and he is thriving. So again, you had to have the difficult conversation. And so often we avoid these kinds of conversations because they're difficult, because they're uncomfortable and we don't like confrontation. Or we're afraid if we tell the truth, people won't like us anymore.
Starting point is 00:07:09 So we avoid the truth, because we want to stay in like, but then as you stay in like, you never move to greater intimacy and connection and love. And you can never help someone be great if you don't challenge them and sometimes experience that discomfort. So we had that conversation, and I think more teams, more organizations, more leaders, more people, more marriages need to have these kind of
Starting point is 00:07:31 difficult conversations. My wife has had many of these with me over the years, you know it. I've been witness to a few of them. Yeah, right in front of them. We're the couple that will argue in front of friends sometimes. True, it's true.
Starting point is 00:07:44 I think they're very deeply deeply in love. Let me ask you about that difficult thing because everyone listening to this, that thing you just said like John says brilliant things and just goes on to the next thing but like we'd rather be in like than to go to that deeper level of intimacy with a friend. And by the way, it's one of the reasons immediately, you know, I've been alive a long time so I have a very close circle of friends as you know when we met one another. And I think it's surprised both of us how quickly I'm like, please come into my circle here. And you're like, no, I want you to come into
Starting point is 00:08:10 mine. And one of the reasons was, is I felt like, I think this dude will speak truth to me about me. And I say all the time, I don't want my friends to accept me. I want them to love me and believe in me. They don't need to accept everything. I want them to think I'm better than I'm behaving in certain ways. But I'm gonna push you'm behaving in certain ways. But I'm gonna push you on this a little bit. You do this a lot. Like you do it a lot and sometimes you're okay even if a relationship bends if they don't like what you have to say. But you're very good at it. Is there something you do? Is it a tonality? Do you think it's the way you
Starting point is 00:08:39 make eye contact? Is there anything you say before? Like this thing you said to him, like, I'll leave if you want me to. Is there some key to, I think once you're in a difficult conversation, you can navigate sometimes it's getting into it in the first place. It's almost like asking somebody on a first date. That's so difficult, right? But once you're on the date, it's the date, but the difficult conversation, it's the bridge to get into it. Is there anything you do consciously to bridge yourself in to say, are you going to allow me to do this? Is there anything you do like that that you might want to teach everybody here?
Starting point is 00:09:12 That's such a great question because I never really thought about what I do, but in analyzing and as you're asking, I care. And if people know that you care, they will allow you to speak into their life. I call it love tough instead of tough love. If people know you love them, you earned the right to challenge them, to push them, to help them grow, but they gotta know you love them. Let me ask you, if you knew someone had your best interest at heart,
Starting point is 00:09:36 would you be more open to their feedback? Yes. Of course you would, everyone would. So I think I come at it with love, with care. Love must arrive before truth. If truth arrives before love, they won't like it, right? Ooh. When you hate the truth, the truth sounds like hate.
Starting point is 00:09:56 And so when you love the truth, it sounds like love. When you lead with love, you're more open to the truth. So a couple of points on just truth and love and hate and how people receive things. So if love arrives first, okay, now I'm open to the truth because I know you love me and care about me. So I think I lead with that. And also, you know, we wrote about in this book, the model of the star three model that helps people have difficult conversations. And it's about small ego, big mission. So I have a small ego when I'm helping someone. I'm not putting myself out there as the authority.
Starting point is 00:10:30 Even though I was challenging Lane, I was explaining my own deficiencies, my own challenges, how I overcame negativity, how my wife almost left me, how I have sinned in the past and the wrongs that I have done and how I've gotten better. So I led from a place of humility, small ego, big mission. It was about the mission, him getting better. It was about focusing on him, what he could do to be his best to become the best coach, the best human being, the best father, the best husband. It was about that.
Starting point is 00:10:59 Then there's that T in star three, that T is, we gotta tell the truth and love and you gotta be open and honest and tell the truth. People, again, who wanna get better, will be willing to hear the truth. Any great athlete wants to hear the truth and how they can improve, because they wanna get better.
Starting point is 00:11:16 And then there's the A of assume positive intent. And so you gotta assume positive intent as the person receiving, but also the person giving. And again, if you're someone who is telling the truth, you have credibility, they know you care about them, they're going to assume your positive intent. And then the R3 is respect. You got to come with respect.
Starting point is 00:11:37 I didn't demean him, I respected who he was. Even though he was engaging in things I didn't agree with, I still respected him as a person. It's about the relationship. So when you're speaking truth and you're having the devil conversation, remember it's about the relationship. Don't lose the relationship. You and I have friends that we debated
Starting point is 00:11:55 and disagree with many times, especially during the pandemic, there were disagreements that I had with certain friends, but we never lost the relationship even in the debate because we respected each other and we knew lost the relationship, even in the debate, because we respected each other and we knew that the relationship was really important. And then there's rules of engagement. How do we create rules of engagement that allow us to have difficult conversations?
Starting point is 00:12:15 And this is really key. You have to have the rules of engagement in a marriage, in an office, in a sports environment. And one of those rules might be, we're not going to get emotionally charged when we're having a difficult conversation. We're going to make sure that we stay calm. One of our difficult conversations rules of engagement for my team is no meetings after the meetings. And so after you have the big meeting, there's no meetings afterwards where everyone's gossiping about the meeting. Like, oh, did you hear what so-and-so said? That was stupid. Can't believe they said that. What a stupid idea that was. No, you say it in the meaning. You say it in the conversation. So we know there's no side agenda going on. Everything is in front. Everything is transparent.
Starting point is 00:12:54 Everything is real. Being honest, open, transparent, humble, truth, love, accountability, all allows for a great conversation and ultimately someone to change. Oh good, I was thinking about the love part. You know, the person I've taken the most advice from in my life and difficult advice from was my dad when he was alive. And it's because he had the keys to my heart and my mind because he loved me. I knew where it was coming from. By the way, not always my dad's advice was right every time either. It was right most of the time though. I also look at it that way, like, got to be right about 80% of the time, if they can get about 80% of the time,
Starting point is 00:13:28 but I listened to my dad because there was no issue with me wondering whether or not there was love there. I'll tell you another thing about this, I'll call it self-deprecation or self-vulnerability as the key's in. I was in a conversation, I'll share this with everybody last night, I'll share with you now about a conversation I had last night. And I was asked to call somebody that's a very, you know, well-known person in the world who's going through a very difficult time and they were a little bit abrupt with me when I first contacted them. And so like I normally am, I got a little bit aggressive with them.
Starting point is 00:14:01 And I was making these incredible points about things they needed to do that were not landing with them at all, because their defenses were up. So we're about a half hour into this conversation, I'm kind of just, and this and this and the brilliance I thought was pouring out of me and the reasoning and I mean, I gave them great reasons and we were going nowhere and I could feel their energy getting lower and lower and more frustrated and more distant. And then at some point in the conversation, I stopped and they talked for a few minutes. I didn't let them talk enough either, another mistake I made. And then I stopped and I said, can I just say something to you? And I said, this has been the worst year of my life too. And I've been down and I've had some health issues and I've had some emotional
Starting point is 00:14:47 issues and I've had this or that and I caused some of these things and, and, um, I was very vulnerable, very vulnerable with this person and the entire conversation shifted in that moment. And when we got off the phone an hour later, that next hour didn't even resemble the first half hour because I was open about my deficiencies, open about my weaknesses and that connected us and I think created trust in the conversation. So you're 100% right. By the way, I tease this or you let's at least bring it up now. November 3rd and 4th, you and I, John Maxwell, VIP dinner. This is like an immersive day. It's basically us
Starting point is 00:15:22 in a room. We already have incredible leaders coming from different industries to this event. Guys, John and I are great, but whoever the other people in this room are pretty special as well. So tell them about the event really quick, just so they know, because for the right person, this is going to be a special day that it's not going to happen again. So it's, it's coming soon. And if you want to get involved, we're running out of seats.
Starting point is 00:15:43 That's not hype either, neither John or I hype up seats. We really think we have two seats left for the VIP dinner and a few for the event. So tell them about it. Yeah, this is a very high level event. Only 75 people for the full day on November 4th. Again, only two seats left for the VIP dinner the night before.
Starting point is 00:16:02 And this is high level leaders. And the great thing about this, Ed, people can come to this event and we'll get so much out of just being with the other people besides us. And we weren't even there. Our thought is that people will benefit from who they meet in the room,
Starting point is 00:16:15 from the connections they develop, these incredible leaders, and what they learn from each other. And then you also get me and you sharing what we know and also asking them what they know. So it's like a round table more than there's a conference. It's not us just speaking the entire time. We will speak.
Starting point is 00:16:30 We're going to share things that they have not heard us share before. So we're going to share something new, unique, very innovative, but also we're going to have a reverse hot seat where the people in the room will talk about what they're doing with their companies because these are CEOs that will be there. These are VPs of companies. These are entrepreneurs. These are people who are high level leaders running things, leading people. As you said, Ed, some of the people in the room, like off the charts leaders, incredible.
Starting point is 00:16:56 Some of the greatest leaders I know are coming. Again, we have about 10 seats left. If people want to come, I recommend that they get their ticket now before it sells out. Yeah, and it's, how do they get it? Where do they go? They go to adaywithjohnanded, I'll spell it out, adaywith, J-O-N, my name is spelled J-O-N, and Ed.
Starting point is 00:17:17 That's A-N-D-E-D. So adaywithjohnanded.com. And you'll see the two options. I'm sure the VIP will probably be gone by this time, but But what's crazy about this event is we've not promoted it yet and it's already almost sold out. And by the way, guys, when we say there's an incredible people, don't be intimidated by that either. You want to get in a room like that. You may say, well, I don't run a 500 person company. That's okay. Get in a room. If you ever want to someday, these are the kind of rooms you want to get into. It'll be welcoming.
Starting point is 00:17:45 It'll be friendly. You belong there. Don't feel intimidated. If you ever want to do invest in yourself and really have a day that changes your life. By the way, it's in Ponta Beater Beach, Florida, where John and I both have homes. And so it'll be in a beautiful location as well. It's at the TPC clubhouse. So where you play golf, where the championship is at that clubhouse, a beautiful destination, a beautiful location. And as you said, a lot of people who are, who are developing leaders, aspiring leaders, if you want to learn from the best and be around the best, this is the kind of
Starting point is 00:18:15 event where you're going to learn and grow the most. Like the investment in this is going to take your life and career to the next level. I only did it one other year. It was last year, our first year. and the feedback was really incredible. Off the charts, everyone who came said it was the best event they've ever been to, and I know this year, man, gonna be even better. It is. It's gonna be better. Between the two of us, you know, we've mentored people that, you know, lead about every industry in the world and influence a lot of other people, but I also want y'all to know it's a special room, but at the same time, and then we'll just, you know, get into the rest of the podcast. Please don't be intimidated if you want
Starting point is 00:18:45 to come you're welcomed there and if you're a growing leader and you want to spread your wings and stretch and get better this is the type of room you want to be into and we will make sure you're incredibly comfortable and like I said it's where they play the fifth major it's where they play the players championship and so it's a beautiful setting as well okay back to the stuff so hey guys I want to jump in here for a second and talk about change and growth. And you know, by the way, it's no secret how people get ahead in life or how they grow. And also taking a look at the
Starting point is 00:19:12 future. If you want to change your future, you got to change the things you're doing. If you continue to do the same things, you're probably going to produce the same results. But if you get into a new environment where you're learning new things and you're around other people that are growth oriented, you're much more likely to do that yourself. And that's why I love Growth Day. Write this down for a second, growthday.com forward slash ed. My friend Brendal Bruchard has created the most incredible personal development and business app that I've ever seen in my life. Everything from goal setting software to personal accountability, journaling, horses, thousands of dollars worth of courses in there as well. I create content in there on Mondays where I contribute as do a whole bunch of other influence like the Avengers of
Starting point is 00:19:50 Influencers and business minds in there. It's the Netflix for high achievers or people that want to be high achievers So go check it out My friend Brennan's made it very affordable very easy to get involved go to growthday.com forward slash ed That's growthday.com forward slash ed growthday.com forward slash ed that's growthday.com forward slash ed This show is sponsored by Airbnb. I gotta tell you, I get tired of staying at hotels. I travel a lot in hotels, no offense, but they're getting noisier and noisier and noisier. And a lot of things that used to come with the hotel rooms like room service and other benefits like that, they just don't do it anymore or not like they used to. So my last
Starting point is 00:20:23 couple of trips, I told my team, let's just stay at an Airbnb. We stayed at an Airbnb and I'll probably never go back again. It was the coolest experience ever. Privacy, luxurious, the space was great. All of it. I loved it. And then when I'm there, I was like, wait a minute, I have a home that simply sits a lot.
Starting point is 00:20:39 I could be generating revenue on these places. I wonder how this works. So when I looked into it, I'm like, I'm going to Airbnb my place. So now I'm only staying at Airbnbs when I travel, but other people are staying at my house as well when I'm gone. It's awesome. I'm generating revenue when I'm not there. So, hey, I'm telling you, your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much more at airbnb.ca slash host. So I get asked all the time, how did I get so much attention on social media, in my businesses, email lists, et cetera? I can tell you straight up, it's been constant contact.
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Starting point is 00:21:36 gonna grow your customer list big time and communicate more effectively to sell more, raise more, and grow fast on social media. So get going and start growing your business today with a free trial at constantcontact.com just go to constantcontact.com right now constantcontact helping the small stand tall constantcontact.com you know you're saying John has this amazing thing where the Holy Spirit hits him when he's walking or you know working he's a prolific writer he's always always, Ed, I got this new thing. I got this idea. It just came to me.
Starting point is 00:22:07 It's amazing. And you were talking earlier about something about human beings in general. You said it for men, but we both agree that it's gender neutral about what someone needs. I don't know if you called it to be blissful or happy in their life, but take us through that just for a second, because I think this is just absolute truth and brilliance about if you don't feel like you're on your path right now, it may be this reason right here. Everyone I've met recently who is struggling, I've realized they're missing one of these three things and sometimes they're missing all three.
Starting point is 00:22:38 And so if you meet a young person who's struggling, most likely they're missing these three or one of these three. Person who retires, they're missing this. So it does fit all types of people. It also fits men and women. I think every human being deals with this. And these are the three things that we really truly need to be fulfilled, happy, and feel like we are on the right track to creating something in our life. We all need a mission, Ed. We all need something to go towards, to work towards. We need something to long for, something to hope for. We need to be on a mission, creating something, building something.
Starting point is 00:23:12 That's how we're wired. That's who we are. We need a mission. For a kid in school, the mission is great grades, or it's to get into college. For someone at work, they want to achieve something in their job. For an entrepreneur, it's building that company or it's taking that product and
Starting point is 00:23:29 getting that product to everyone in the world, whatever it may be, there's that mission that you are on for an athlete. They want to be the best. They want to be a hall of famer. They want to be a starter on the team. There's, there's a mission we're trying to achieve. The second thing that every human being needs is a team. We all need a team to be successful. No one creates success alone. We
Starting point is 00:23:50 need people around us. We need that connection. We need that support. So everyone needs a team. And the challenge for many is when they retire, they lose their team. For many athletes, when they give up their sport, when they're done playing, they struggle so much because they no longer have the mission they were on and they no longer have the team supporting them. Many coaches that I meet when they retire, they really struggle with this. Many men and women, when they retire from their industry, from their careers, they no longer have the team they had at work. We've got to find a new team. I have a whole certified training program right now, and it's really cool. People are joining it and they're joining a team of other speakers, other trainers.
Starting point is 00:24:32 And you can tell they're so happy. They're so fulfilled because they now have this team that they're now working with and growing with. And the last thing that everyone needs is a scoreboard. We're all measuring ourselves and measuring ourselves against others. Whether we like it or not, that's what we do. We're human beings. We need a scoreboard. It might be grades when you're in school, in your job or in your sales, for instance. If you're in sales, it's about those numbers. How are those numbers doing? How are those KPIs doing? How many
Starting point is 00:25:04 people have we helped? How many people have we helped? How many people have we impacted as an author? You know, we count how many people have bought books. You said earlier, you sold millions of books. Yes, I remember starting out saying, I want to sell millions of books. I wanted a scoreboard and the metric every year is how many books did you sell?
Starting point is 00:25:22 Now, as we grow, we evolve, we become more focused on more meaningful things. That scoreboard is still there, but it becomes how many people did I impact? How many listeners are listening to this podcast and being impacted by Ed's incredible words, by his motivation, his inspiration, his lessons, his teachings. Ed, you have obviously the greatest podcast on the planet. Everybody listens to it. Everybody tells me about it. And it feels good knowing that you are impacting lives,
Starting point is 00:25:50 but you wanna impact more lives. And so there's the scoreboard again. John Maxwell, our good friend, he's measuring salvations now and the impact that he's having as he goes around the world through his foundation and quip. They are counting salvation. So they have a scoreboard and that drives them.
Starting point is 00:26:09 So every human being needs a scoreboard to measure. And again, so many times we lose the one scoreboard, we gotta find another one. Yeah, that's true. You wanna be happy, you wanna be fulfilled. You gotta have both. And so you gotta have the mission, you gotta have the team and you gotta have to be fulfilled. You got to have both. And so you got to have the mission, you got to have the team, and you got to have a scoreboard.
Starting point is 00:26:27 You're so right. I, uh, I've had friends of mine that were a bit lost and all of a sudden they found a passion and a mission again. It could be, you know, a charity they're involved with or something in their career. And you see them a year later, like me, you're a completely different person because they've got a mission in their life. And then one thing I've accepted about myself that I just no longer try to escape. I'm a competitor. I want to compete. I want to win. I want to be great. And the times in my life where I'm like, I'm kind of tired of competing
Starting point is 00:26:53 in the scoreboard and I'm more mature than that now. And no, it's just if I'm not competing, if there's not a scoreboard, if we're not keeping score, it's like I want to win. And I've just accepted that about myself. However long I live, if I live to 110 or I live 10 more days, I'll be competing to the end about something. And it's just, you need those things. You need a mission. You need a team. You need a scoreboard. It's just facts. It's just an absolute fact. By the way, my producers just said, you and I are good at promoting things. So if you wanted to go to our event, and I'll just say this, I'll say it at the end. It's a day with johnanded.com. Is that correct? Yes. A day with johnanded.com. Okay. And we are counting how many people are
Starting point is 00:27:33 going to come. Yeah, we're competitive. Sure. We're competitive about it. You know what's great about competitive? You just said that. I love that because the competitive spirit is actually in every The competitive spirit is actually in every great human being and everyone who is to who strives for that greatness. They have a competitive spirit. I've been thinking about this recently. I've been watching people. I've been looking at pastors. I know there's some of the most competitive people I know. The most successful people I know are really competitive. I asked John Maxwell, are you competitive? He said, oh yeah, I played ball. He was very competitive. Ken Blanchard, everyone thinks Ken is sweet. Even being this nice, he's older now in his 80s.
Starting point is 00:28:11 Ken, are you competitive? Oh yeah, I was competitive my whole life. I was an athlete, I played basketball. So we learned to compete at one level. We have this competitive spirit in us. And I believe God uses that competitive spirit that you have, that he puts in you, to be competitive, uses that competitive Spirit that you have that he puts in you to be competitive, to fight for things that are noble, to fight for what is good,
Starting point is 00:28:30 to fight to create positive change in this world. And so you have the competitive Spirit for a reason and it must be channeled in the right direction for the right purpose. And when you know your why, you'll know the way and you will let obstacles get in the way. And we don't get burned out because of what we do. We get burned out because we forget why we do it. So you get that why, you get that purpose, you get that competitive spirit. Man, you will be unstoppable. It's so good. Let's talk about great people for a minute because you can go everywhere with John.
Starting point is 00:28:57 That's why I love having him on the show. You're around a lot of great people. I'm talking about high level now. Okay, I want your take on this. So let's just take coaches, for example, high level, let's take college football, which I believe college basketball and football coaching is two of the most difficult leadership positions in almost any area in any industry. Constant pressure, constant recruiting, boosters, kids. Now with the NIL transfer portal, do you do it, do you not?
Starting point is 00:29:25 You know, you got to make sure you win a certain amount of games, your kids got to graduate at a certain rate, you got to deal with, you know, everything on television and the media and competition and schemes and the game-changing and staying modern and keeping up and the new rules and officials and it's just you guys, you can't even imagine the endorsements and the gear and the replacing coaches who leave to go to other schools all the time. People don't realize this, this, this leadership thing is. It's an ongoing process and the people you interact with are already at the top level. Right.
Starting point is 00:29:59 But then there's a few like two three, that are even different than them. So you take all of coaching, then you go to division one, then you go to top 50 schools, that's where you're usually working. So you're talking about a handful of unbelievable leaders, and then even in that group, there's a subgroup of two or three or four. Okay. I want to know from you specifically, what's the difference when you walk into the program or know the coach, the man or the woman who's in that two, three or four, even out of the 50, what's the difference with them, their programs, Dabo Sweeney, I think of guys like that who are leading at such a high level. They have such integrity. I mean, the integrity of that, they are aligned. They know why they're doing what they're doing.
Starting point is 00:30:52 They have a clear mission. They know the kind of culture they want to build and they build that culture every single day and they don't compromise. They do not compromise their principles for short-term games and short-term gains. They are in for the long haul. And I've seen Dabble make decisions that weren't the best decision to win, but it was the best decision for his program, best decision for his faith, best decision for his team, and best decision to stand by what is right. So I've seen that over and over again with someone like that. There's this high level of integrity and alignment. There's this incredible belief and just contagious
Starting point is 00:31:30 energy to be able to rally people towards their vision, towards their mission, to get them on the bus, to really get them to believe in where they're going and why they're going there. Leadership is a transfer of belief. Steve Jobs for all his flaws and faults, he had incredible vision and belief that people were attracted to. And he was able to really rally people towards that vision. That's why Apple is what Apple is today. And I see Dabo and Sark now with the culture
Starting point is 00:31:59 he has built at Texas and PJ Fleck, an incredible aligned leader in college. I think there's more than three or four now though, and I'm starting to see really great leaders rising up and meeting more and more of these guys and talking to them. And they're just getting better and better. It's great to watch them improve. And I love meeting these guys
Starting point is 00:32:18 and we get to have these incredible conversations. Matt Ruhl's up there. I knew Matt Ruhl was gonna turn around Nebraska and he's already on the right path, Just beat Colorado. Matt rules, an incredible coach and spending time with them. Got back to me right away. Read the one truth. Like it's really cool talking to these guys. And then as, as you interact with them, you start to see why they are so successful. And Matt, for instance, like I can always tell a great coach, they get back to you right away. Like they respond to you, you text them, they respond right away.
Starting point is 00:32:47 They have this ability to be connected, present, and able to handle a lot of things. You have the same thing. You're able to do a lot at one time, manage a lot of things, manage a lot of people. How do you do it? I think there's an incredible amount of energy there too. There's a lot of energy. There's a lot of fire. 90% of you don't know the names of the five people that he just said. Most people don't know who Matt Ruhl is
Starting point is 00:33:10 or PJ Fleck or most especially those who listen to the show. But those characteristics are what matter and one of them just is infectious big energy that's abundant. That's why you need to stay physically strong. It's why you need to stay hydrated. It's why you gotta be so connected to your why. The other thing I think everybody should know is you do build up to this. You know, I found out in my life about every room,
Starting point is 00:33:35 this is my next question for you too, about every new level I've gone to, I didn't feel completely prepared when I stepped into that room, but I somehow have built now the belief that I will figure it out once I'm in the room. So I don't need to know everything to go to the next level. I want to know as much as I can.
Starting point is 00:33:55 But when I get in there, I'm going to figure it out. And I think a lot of you just need to have some faith in yourself and in God that when you step into that unknown space, you have the capacity to innovate, improvise, figure it out, navigate your way through something more than you probably realized. However, I have had bouts in my life where the level got so high. I remember the first time I spoke in front of like 30,000 people. That's different than 3,000, right? Like you walk out and it's like, oh my gosh, the first time. And that might be that next promotion you get everybody or that next time you, you know, you have an
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Starting point is 00:36:40 treat cure or prevent any disease or condition your birthday, I want to take everybody into for a minute, and then I want to ask you the truth about this in you. John's birthday party was really interesting. I was honored to be there, but you looked around the room that in this party, we were honoring John for his 50th birthday. Was it your 50th we were doing? But we did like-
Starting point is 00:37:00 It was my 50th, but I was 52, because we didn't get to celebrate during COVID. We didn't get to do it during the deal. But in the room was like, there's an NFL football coach, then there's a video from a major league baseball coach, then there's this professional golfer, then there's this very famous TV personality, and then there was so-and-so and so-and-so. And I watched you that night. You were very emotional, but I felt like it was emotional in two ways, like a lot of gratitude.
Starting point is 00:37:26 But I also felt like there was a part of you, and this is healthy, you're like, I can't believe all this has happened. I can't believe I know all these people. I can't believe I've influenced all these people. Give everyone a peek when you get to the other side of your dream, which is you're on the other side now, you're making new dreams happen. But I think everyone here would love to know, like, I got this dream. I'd love to have that happen someday. What does it feel like? Is it an out of body experience? Do you feel like an imposter? What's it feel like to get to that other side?
Starting point is 00:37:55 So at first you feel like an imposter. You're like, how did I get here and do I even belong here? And so often you don't. But I love what you said earlier, Ed, because you talked about that you're not always ready for it. You have to go through it. You actually have to go through the fire to be sharpened, to be refined, to become who you're meant to be. And so every great leader I know had to go through a lot of stuff, a lot of challenges, a lot of adversity, a lot of lessons along the way to become the leader they are now. We often see someone now like me at 53 now, and my friends
Starting point is 00:38:27 cannot believe what I'm doing now. I was a mental wreck in college. I was a division one athlete, and I was a mental wreck. I was a mental wreck in most of my 20s, early 30s. I started to transform in my early 30s, and it's been a a journey ever since now to 53. So yes, the feeling is, wow, like how'd I get here? Do I belong here? But then as you start to help people and you start to lead others and you start to see the impact, then it goes towards conviction like, okay, I know what I'm talking about. I know what really helps and I want to help even more people. So there's an expectation of this is why I'm here, this is what I'm meant to do. But still in every moment, like that birthday
Starting point is 00:39:11 party and becoming friends with you, that was a big moment in my life. Being friends with you elevated me in so many ways because I saw the boldness that you had. I saw the courage that you said. I saw the way you thought at such a high level. I saw the way you worked out and took care of your body. I started to work out after that. I had to go through some fires and learn and grow from people like you to become who I was meant to become. Then you get to that level and there are moments where you say, wow, I still can't believe this is my life.
Starting point is 00:39:40 And I ask the same thing of all the great coaches, can you believe this is you? No, no way. So I asked the same thing of all the great coaches. Can you believe this is you? No, no way. So they feel the same way. Everyone is thinking and feeling the same way. I even think Sylvester Stallone actually says to himself, I can't believe I am Rocky. I can't believe this is my life. I'm pretty sure everyone thinks that. And the ones who feel that and think that have a deep sense of humility and gratitude and also faith. They know that they didn't do it alone. There's no way I could have done this or planned this on my own.
Starting point is 00:40:10 When I look back at who I was and who I am now, what I'm doing, and this should give hope to people because there is a plan for your life and your job is to show up every day and do the work and get better and live with integrity and love and serve and care and live the principles that Ed talks about and that we talk about. You live those principles. They will result in incredible long-term success, but so many people are not willing to do the work or they don't have the integrity or they want immediate success right now. And they wind up giving it all away for short term gain and short term success. And they often do things in an unethical way to get there. And you know what?
Starting point is 00:40:52 Live in the right way, doing the right thing, surrounding yourself with the right people, everything we talk about. These are not just words, they are how to live your life if you want success. So I think as I get older, I'm looking forward, I'm 53, I look at John Maxwell, I know you do as well. Okay. The next 20, 30 years, how do I want to live? What do I want to accomplish and who do I want to impact and how am I going
Starting point is 00:41:13 to do that every single day? So I'm very intentional. And I think that's the other hallmark of great leaders that we talked about earlier. Very intentional in everything they do, intentional in culture, in their mindset, and their leadership and how they build Relationships and develop others. I have to tell you that it's such a great explanation. By the way, it is true of sly sly can't believe it and Here's what I wish everybody had. I wish you had the benefit of knowing so many of these High impact people and the reason I do is that as I got to know all of them,
Starting point is 00:41:46 it's what you just said, they're very much human. They very much have their own weaknesses and frailties, and they are not superhuman. And I wish so many of you could get to know so many of them and you could see their humanness on full display, because it would give you so much more hope that you're much closer to your dreams than you believe you are that these are not crazy unbelievable people with somehow these unreal gifts for the most part that you don't have what they are as they
Starting point is 00:42:17 are average ordinary people who have developed extraordinary patterns thoughts and habits and their belief systems are slightly different now. But believe me, they struggle as well. And if you knew that, you would have more admiration ironically for them because you'd know that they did it with a very average set of skills in the most part. And I also want to encourage everybody this. Those people all have one other thing in common. And this may seem very basic but it's not. They didn't quit and most people quit when that imposter
Starting point is 00:42:51 thing kicks in. Most people quit when their 16th failure kicks in and there's so much to be said for built-up inertia in progress that you just eventually move past through inertia through just sheer force of effort over time, that sort of overcomes most of your deficiencies and weaknesses. And then when you mix that with God's grace and blessing, I almost think sometimes God's sitting back there going, I'm just gonna watch you. And if you just won't quit, if you'll just keep planting the seeds, you keep, there's a harvest coming, but you'd better have some faith. And I think most people, they just quit because they don't ever get to the other side of the seeds, you keep, there's a harvest coming but you better have some faith. And I think most people, they just quit because they don't ever get to the other side of the inertia and then they start
Starting point is 00:43:30 convincing themselves, no that guy's just better than me, that lady's just smarter than me, they're just special or they just got all the breaks. None of which is true. The combination of knowing how human most of these people are and have their own frailties and weaknesses and the combination of not quitting until you develop these habits, thoughts, beliefs, and patterns is really the holy grail of getting to wherever you want to get in your dreams. And they're willing to work through the, and they're willing to work through their challenges, you know, and I get the call from the coach or the leader who's struggling, you do as well.
Starting point is 00:44:02 We get those calls. We are the trusted advisor to a lot of these leaders. And when they call, they're struggling with something. And I see it as my job to help them through the struggle, to give them some great clarity, some wisdom, and some ideas for a path forward. And man, I've had some really special conversations. I can't share, of course, what they are, but incredible conversations where you see the humanity and how human these people are. And you realize that, man, everyone's going to go I can't share of course what they are, but incredible conversations where you see the humanity and how human these people are. And you realize that, man,
Starting point is 00:44:29 everyone's gonna go through something. Everyone's gonna go through a challenge. Everyone has a wound that needs to be healed. Everyone has a past that they need to work through and get through and overcome in order to create their future. And here's the thing, this is the journey of everybody who wants to be great. Everyone will have to go through opposition,
Starting point is 00:44:47 adversity and challenges. My friend Brian Schwartz wrote a book called Worthy Opponents. We all have to face worthy opponents on the journey of life. The worthy opponents make us stronger. God actually gives us those worthy opponents to make us stronger. They're meant to refine us.
Starting point is 00:45:04 They're meant to test us. They're meant to test us. They're meant to help us grow. Again, did you have a rival Ed in high school and in college? I bet you did. Yes, absolutely. So did I. We have rivals throughout our lives.
Starting point is 00:45:14 We have adversaries. We have setbacks that happen and they all help us become who we're meant to be. If you don't have the competitive spirit and you don't learn to fight and you don't learn to compete and you don't learn to take on those challenges and you don't learn to fight and you don't learn to compete and you don't learn to take on those challenges and you don't learn how to get back up
Starting point is 00:45:28 after getting knocked down, you will not become who you're meant to be. So this is part of God's curriculum and the growth process for who we're meant to become and the leaders we're meant to be. So the thing is, people when they're going through it think something's wrong with them. No, it means you're actually on the right track.
Starting point is 00:45:43 It means that actually God is giving you the opposition so you'll grow stronger because there's something greater for you. Gosh, that's so good. God's curriculum. I'm stealing that. That's mine now. I want you to talk about the antenna a little bit. You know, one of the ways that you get there is you change things about your disposition. And so when I was younger, I used to think certain things about me were my strengths, or I could get away with them. And what I learned is sometimes it's not a matter of just even developing new skills or talents. It's shedding the thing that holds you back. It's pruning yourself almost. When I was young, I used to think my intensity, my passion was my strength.
Starting point is 00:46:24 But very close brother or sister to that was anger. And I was more of an angry type leader. I think that's really hard for most people to watch my stuff now, like I or that you were a negative thinker because it's just so contrary to what you see with you now. But mine was anger and I had to, I was winning in spite of that thing that I kept telling myself was one of my gifts. And when I finally decided that I was going to grow up and mature and change this thing about myself and tap into better thinking and better behavior, my whole life took off. You talk about the antenna, you also talk about the fact that it's hard to believe that you're the positive guy that was always constantly chronically negative. So take those two things together, just dive in on that.
Starting point is 00:47:05 Is part of becoming successful, happier, shedding things that about yourself that are holding you back and being honest about what that thing is. And then if I'm right about that, how does one tap into the good stuff? Man, that's a lot right there to unpack. But we have an antenna and that antenna causes us to tune into two main frequencies, a positive frequency or a negative frequency. And there's a choice between two and there's only two. And everything in life comes down to positive and negative. It's why there's a main gist in our life. And there's also a shadow part of that. There's duality. And so that anger is caused
Starting point is 00:47:41 by something deeper. There's love, there's hate, right? There's confidence. There's a lack of confidence. There's always two sides to every coin. You have to understand that. And you're either fueled by the positive or the negative. You're fueled by either the wounds or the healing. And so often people are fueled by anger because they're hurt. And that anger actually feels better than depression. So it fuels them. But anger and depression are actually very close. Anger is depression that gets off the couch. Anger is depression that gets off the couch and goes and does something and finds the juice to do it. And so I call anger steroids of the soul.
Starting point is 00:48:22 It actually gives you temporary boost of energy, temporary power, so it feels good, but at the same time, it's actually destroying you in the process, because it's coming from a place of hurt, a place of a wound. And so many people are driven by this anger or this wound and the need to be successful, the need to be liked, the need to show that their father who left,
Starting point is 00:48:43 that they are someone. And so the wound drives them and it drove me for a long time. This is how I know this so well. My biological father left when I was a year old. So there was a wound that drove me to be successful. Then I lose my job 30, 31 years old. My wife's about to leave me. I'm almost bankrupt. Everything comes crashing down. The guy that was fueled by all of this at the scoreboard of success and wealth and fame, everything came crumbling down. Now what am I fueled by? It was a crisis of epic proportions and everyone will go through
Starting point is 00:49:16 this at some point in their life, I believe. And it was during that time I said, okay, I want to make a difference. I want to impact others. I want my life to be about others, not myself. I want to get closer to God. I knew I impact others. I want my life to be that others not myself. I I want to get closer to God I knew I didn't have God in my life and that was a defining moment in my life and then from there it became about a healthy ambition It was a healthy ambition which is different than anger, which is different than being fueled by a wound now It's being fueled by your healing not the wound by a wound. Now it's being fueled by your healing, not the wound. The growth, the healing to heal yourself and then to heal others. And from there comes power and peace and confidence
Starting point is 00:49:51 and courage. And you can see the difference. Someone who's fueled by love and someone who's fueled by fear. It all comes down to love and fear. What's driving you? The love of others or the fear of not having enough, the fear of not being successful or the love of competing and the love of being your best and the love of your teammates. One will help you perform at the highest level of the love. The fear will cause you to have short-term success, but eventually will be a constraint that brings you down. So I tell everyone, look at what's fueling you and what's driving you and you're either living from your wound or your healing. And that's how you'll know whether you're on the right path or not. Now, Ed, you were obviously driven by the anger
Starting point is 00:50:29 that came from a wound. Then you began the process of healing and self-growth, self-mastery, and then it led to a different mindset, different perspective, different energy connected to a greater source, a greater power to God. And all of a sudden you now become a conduit for all that God wants to do in the world rather than this person who's blocking, blocking the flow of God's power and peace in your life. So are you being blocked or you actually be in a conduit for everything that wants to happen in your life
Starting point is 00:50:59 and in the lives of others? And so that's how I look at it from a duality perspective and what each person is facing on this journey. And everyone will move from the wound to the healing. And I really believe this is the path forward for people at work, people in life. More and more people are talking about wounds today because wounds are meant to be healed. And in the healing process, you become your most powerful self. Hey guys, you're busy just like I am and one of the things that goes by the wayside is all the home maintenance stuff you're supposed to be focusing on.
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Starting point is 00:52:31 I'm glad you use the word fear later in the comment because for me the other side of anger wasn't depression it was fear when I got afraid I got angry fear and anger very close and the other reason you want to move to the antenna plugged into love over fear is that you know you can let there's a dark side that works it really does and it's okay that you do that I suppose but I can tell you two things about it those people that get to the other side when they win they're really tired and they don't sustain their growth because either one of two things happens they heal the wound and then there's nothing to move with because they've healed or two, it never heals. And they're just tired of trying to heal this thing over and over. And that's why a lot of athletes you watch that were fueled by anger
Starting point is 00:53:12 their entire career, you watch them post-career and you're like, wow, they don't have the mission. They don't have a team, they don't have a scoreboard anymore. And their entire fuel was moving away from a wound. And so they're tired and burnt out. And frankly, I'll use a term kind of used up. They used up candy and sugar to become successful, rather than leverage something healthy to become successful that's never ending, that has a ripple effect that infects other people that becomes infectious. That's long term. There's so many reasons why what you just said is profound. You can continue to have that if it's your pattern right now and you're without the other, but you can simultaneously start to build a bridge to love.
Starting point is 00:53:54 And the quicker you can get over there and tap into that antenna, I'm telling you your energy level will be higher. And that's why you're looking at two 53 year olds, right, on a call right now in the prime of their careers, still in the hunt 30 years later, after a bunch of ups and downs, because we're moving out of that love button. Now, by the way, I don't dye my hair, John does, everybody knows that. And so that's one of the things we were talking about off camera. That's why John looks younger. Actually, you're looking pretty good. Tell them the truth. You really tell them about your hair. Oh, I don't dye my hair people ask me all the time Do you dye your hair? I know I do not my brother has dark hair as well
Starting point is 00:54:28 He's three years older still has dark hair Our grandfather died with a full set of dark hair at 60 years old from you know, yes He doesn't dye his hair everybody He wanted me to get that on the podcast and that was pretty smooth how I got it in right there for you You're welcome of all the things you wanted in the podcast, we let them know I don't die in my head. Hey, it's a competitive spirit. We're both, you know, we're both guys who are staying young and finding ways to do it and working hard in the process. Cause we're, we're mission driven focus.
Starting point is 00:55:01 And we know why we're doing what we're doing going back to everything we just talked about and the antenna when you're tuned into love that is the highest frequency you can be tuned into fear is actually a low frequency energy it seems like it's powerful but it's not it's pervasive but not powerful love is so powerful so when you are tuning into love you will be your most powerful self. And a lot of people are so driven by fear that they don't know what to do though, to move to that side. It's like, I've been taking this drug of fear for so long. I've been taking this drug of anger for so long. It's my edge. It's what makes me successful. And you want me to give it up? No. But man,
Starting point is 00:55:38 I've gotten a lot of these people to replace it with love. and they have found themselves to be happier, more joyful, and more successful. Because I'm not saying don't give up your competitive spirit. No, it actually is now a healthier competitive spirit. When I'm playing pickleball, I am more driven than ever to beat these 30 year olds that I'm playing. And I'm playing at a high level and I'm competing against these guys because I'm driven by the love of competing. I want to win, but I don't need to win. Difference in business, I want to succeed, but I don't need to succeed. It's different. And by need, I mean not to provide for your family. I mean I need to succeed for my identity to know that I'm a person of value. No, I know I already am. So I'm coming from a place of wholeness, not a place of lack. Lack is there, I'm disconnected. Wholeness, I'm connected.
Starting point is 00:56:32 So when I am whole, I'm powerful. When I'm disconnected, I'm weak. And that's the key here. Yeah, I just was talking to somebody about this very I was, we were talking about that very thing and I said well I, my success is a validation of what I already believe about myself. What you're trying to do is prove something and you're never gonna prove it. So if you, it'd be much easier to attain these things you want if you just held this belief system that you're worthy, that you deserve it, that you, that it's something that you are capable of doing that you don't have to have to prove somebody else wrong. And by the way, we're both saying it's a hell it's it's it works. It's just, it's going to be short term.
Starting point is 00:57:13 You got to tap into the love. Let me ask you this last, by the way, everyone, I'll just say this one last time. It's a day with John and Ed.com. A day with John and Ed.com. And the cool thing about that is the conversation we're having now it's gonna be a completely different conversation on that day. New ideas gonna emerge, new thoughts, new conversations and that's what's cool. When we get together you never know what's gonna come out and the gems that are gonna come out of this spending time together are
Starting point is 00:57:39 gonna be life changing for people that are there. Another huge key in your life is to have two or three people, five, whatever you can get around you, that do what John just said. Remember this, truth and love vibrate at the highest frequency, period. Truth and love, it's the highest vibrational frequency in the world, and when you're vibrating at that high of a frequency,
Starting point is 00:57:56 you can make an awful lot of things in your life come true that other people won't, because they're not vibrating at that frequency and tapping into something that they had their entire life. It's not like we had something you don't, just a matter of tapping into it and experiencing it. Okay, last question for you for today. By the way, what a great conversation. Again, it flew by. I can believe it's been an hour. I can't believe it's been an hour already, but I want to ask you about this. I've wanted to ask you about it for a while since you talked about it with me, and this is detailed, but it's faith-based everyone, but it'll it'll help you
Starting point is 00:58:25 So we I we tapped into it on the last podcast, but we didn't get fully to go into it. I talk a lot about the subconscious mind and So to a lot of my friends and I believe in the subconscious mind Programming it working with it You said to me one time, yeah, there's no such thing. He kind of said it off-handed. Where is it? Right, and you said to me what you're about to say, and I said then what is it? Do I have to know its location in order for it to exist? Because I could push back on him.
Starting point is 00:59:01 Where exactly is God located? And so I want to challenge you on that a little bit and let you really talk about your belief system, about what most people refer to as the subconscious mind and what you believe it really is. Your subconscious is your soul. So we call it a subconscious, but it's your soul. Your soul and your mind are one in the same. And your soul and your mind are your spiritual expression of you and ultimately creates everything that you are. And so you're a soul first and your mind then creates your reality
Starting point is 00:59:37 and it actually drives your brain. The brain doesn't drive the soul. Your soul and your mind drive the brain. It actually creates your life. It goes through the struggles, the challenges, the light lessons, the adversity, the opposition, the moments of love and deep gratitude and support. All of that is an expression of the soul. That's why Jesus talked about taking care of the soul.
Starting point is 01:00:01 He knew that this body was temporary, but the soul was eternal. And so the more we invest in our soul, the more we invest in nurturing the soul, the more we live a more fulfilled life. And that soul is the integrator between your flesh and your spirit. The soul is in the middle, it's the integrator. So we can either be driven by the flesh or the spirit.
Starting point is 01:00:23 And Romans 8.5.6 says, a mind governed by the flesh or the spirit. And Romans 8, 5, 6 says, a mind governed by the flesh leads to death. A mind governed by the spirit leads to life and peace. So this means, are we governed by the flesh? The things of this world, the greed, the lust, all of the challenges in this world and the things that bring people down, the sins that cause people to have their lives ruined. Or are we governed by the spirit of prayer, of God, of purpose, of love, of joy? What are we
Starting point is 01:00:52 governed by? And so the minute your soul starts to actually bathe in the spirit, as it bathes in the spirit, it actually finds life and peace and power. So it's really understanding that. So our whole conversation of the subconscious, my soul is the subconscious. So every thought you've had is stored in your soul. Every idea. That's how you know how to ride a bike. Because think about every cell in your body over time we find is dies and then we have new cells that are created to make your body use. So you're always changing every seven years, like our cells in our body are new. How do you become you again? How does the person who's riding a bike right now, if you haven't ridden a bike in 20 years, know how to ride a bike right now and you haven't ridden
Starting point is 01:01:41 that bike in years and you learned when you were young. You're storing it in your mind and your soul. And what is that mind and soul being governed by? The spirit or the things of this world? Is it fear or is it love? Is it drugs or is it meditation and prayer? And Ed, can I just share this? I'm just feeling led to just share how to fuel yourself with the power of prayer.
Starting point is 01:02:05 I think people need to pray more, but they don't know how. You see, if you take a cucumber and you take that cucumber and you put it in pickle juice and you put it in for like a second and pull it out, is that cucumber transformed? No, that's baptism. A lot of people get baptized, for instance, but they're not transformed. So maybe they've given their life to God and they've accepted Jesus, but they're not transformed. And it's why so many Christians struggle.
Starting point is 01:02:32 Or so many people say, well, that person doesn't act like a Christian. Or that person who's spiritual, maybe they're not a Christian, but they're spiritual, but they don't act in many spiritual ways. They haven't integrated that into their soul, in their mind. The key is that cucumber must bathe in the spirit. It must bathe in the pickle juice. So as your soul bathes more and more in the pickle
Starting point is 01:02:52 juice, you'll be transformed. You'll be renewed. You'll be healed. So I can attribute every success of my life to literally walking and practice gratitude and prayer over the years renewing my mind that's where my healing took place so how do you pray praise God so that's praise and gratitude and that's the P. R is repent repent for your sins repent for the things that you've done wrong just just repent ask for forgiveness we all need to be forgiven, I know I do. So just ask to be forgiven and then forgive others who repent. A, in prayer, ask.
Starting point is 01:03:30 Ask God for what you want. Guess what? It's okay to ask. People go, oh, I don't want to ask him. He's got busier things to do. He's better things to do. No, no, God wants to give you. God's a good father and he wants to give you blessings.
Starting point is 01:03:42 So ask for what you want. He may not give you what you want, but you should ask. I remember in college, I asked to marry this girl and thankfully that didn't happen because I met my wife. We saw a picture recently of my old girlfriend and I said, thank you God. I'm so glad that I met my wife. Like we were not meant to be together. She was not for me. I would not have become who I was meant to become with her. It was supposed to be my wife who I was meant to grow with.
Starting point is 01:04:11 So that's the A. Ask for what you want. God will give you what you want. Why is yield? Yield means to surrender. Get out of your ego, get out of your way and surrender to the creator of the universe. Surrender.
Starting point is 01:04:23 God, I can't do it alone. God, I need you. I surrender to you. Use me for your purpose. Guide me towards my purpose. If you say that prayer all the time, it's amazing what happens when you say it. And then the E, expect. You ask, you surrender, and you expect. You expect God to deliver on his promises. You expect miracles, expect great things, and also trust in God's plan for your life. That's the E. Trust and expectation, one and the same.
Starting point is 01:04:51 Expect and trust. And then the R, I love the R part. It's receive. You're praying, and as you pray, receive God's blessings. Receive what he wants to give you. Receive his gifts. Receive his wisdom, his power, his love, his support, his ideas for you, his plan for you.
Starting point is 01:05:11 I also say I receive all the people that are gonna come to my events. I receive all the people that are meant to read my books. I receive the millions of people who read them and benefit from them. I will actually say that I receive all the people that I'm meant to meet and help along the way. God bring me the people that are meant to meet and help along the way. God bring me the people I'm meant to teach and help. Bring those people to me.
Starting point is 01:05:29 And I receive all of it. So you pray, you do this day in and day out. You do this every day. Just try it for 30 days of walking and practicing prayer. P-R-A-Y-E-R. You will see your life transformed. I guarantee it. Just give it 30 days and you'll want to do it for the rest of your life. So good, John. I love you brother. So good today. That's one of the fastest hours I've ever spent in my life.
Starting point is 01:05:54 So I'm so grateful for it. Thanks brother. Hope people come join us at our event. And if they don't, join us both in our books and podcasts and everything else as well, no pressure whatsoever. I love you, John. Everybody, I don't have to even ask you to. I already know you're gonna share this episode
Starting point is 01:06:08 with as many people that you possibly can, you think it'll make an impact, it'll go to millions. All right, everybody, God bless you. God bless you, everyone. Max out your life. This is The Ed Myron Show.

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