The Edge Breakfast - ONLYFANS - CAN'T TAKE HER ANYWHERE!!

Episode Date: March 16, 2025

This is a podcast from Rover. Dumb chat. Bad decisions. Zero shame. If that sounds like your vibe, you're in the right place. This is Clint, Meg and Dan's OnlyFans. Podcast, that is. Welcome to the OnlyFans. Clint is away again today, so you've got Cal from the Edge Nights jumping in. Good morning. Thanks so much for covering, Cal.

Thank you. Meg and I really do enjoy you coming in, don't we, Meg? We do. Yeah. This dedication and this podcast going out to the- Wait, can I just pause you? I thought there was going to be like a, but, but thank you. But you do smell.

Oh, fuck off. Brie Grace, this is going out to you, my friend, the beautiful Brie Grace. She posted a lovely message on the podcast fam earlier today, which reads a little along the lines of you guys are are amazing. I'm not gonna, I'm just paraphrased there. It sounds worse when you're paraphrasing. You should just read what she's saying verbatim, otherwise it sounds like you're complimenting yourself.

I'll start here. I've listened to The Edge since the JJ, Mike and Dom era, which is what, 10 years ago? I've always found such comfort, joy and laughter with the morning crew. I was a huge fan of Chris and Eli and I grieved for both of them when they left but you guys nail it every

single day. It's such a cool surprise to hear Dan. I won't go into all that. But then she's just said lovely things about us. So we're going to say lovely things about you Bree. You're a fantastic human. You look radiant in your profile photo on Facebook.

It's Brie's first time ever interacting with us. So Brie said, long-time listener, first-time caller, and we say that for anything. But Brie has never called us, let alone written something to us. And I thought it was really cool. Sorry, Cal, bit of a self-involved chat to start this off. No, you're for it. But how she could see that there was a connection between Dan, Clint and I before, you know,

in theory we could see it because we didn't know Dan was going to be Dan for us. Are you touching your giant pimple? Why is that one not going? It's been there for so long.

No, no, no, this is a different one. This is a different one. I've got another pimple. No, that's the same pimple. No, no, no, different one. Shut the fuck up. Different one.

How did you get a pimple so close to the first one? Because I had more chocolate on the weekend. Fuck, go back to Bree. No. I didn't even notice it, Dan. How did you get a pimple so close to the first one? Because I had more chocolate on the weekend. Fuck, go back to Bree. No. I didn't even notice it, Dan. How did you know? That's a lie. It's because I'm facing your other side

of the face. Wait, turn to me, turn to me. Stop it, go back to Bree. No, just quickly so we can move on. Fucking hell! I look like the Phantom of the Opera. One side of my face is completely different to the other. It's huge. Yeah, I just think it's really cool that we had no idea Dan would be a permanent part of the show.

Brilliant. At that stage. Well, we didn't. You just thought I was some fucking dude that was just a villain. He was just producer Dan to us, and me and Clint had no idea what was going to happen with the show, and then obviously Clint went and fucked off and went and got a TV gig and left me with a three-day-old baby

going, what do you mean you've left like he was your husband and it was his kid that's how it felt what do you mean you've left I've got a 72 hour old baby and you're telling me you've left and yeah it's just really cool that we were able to have those like kind of

earlier shows where we didn't know it would be this and I think it all stemmed like there was a real underlining base of sexual energy and it sort of grew from there. I'm sort of reading between the lines. Yeah, I think you're reading very deeply between the lines. I don't even know how you do that. I think it sort of blossomed from sexual energy

to quite a lot of repulsion between the three of us, especially me towards Clint and Meg. But I think slowly but surely we've sort of just worked through those feelings and we've got through the other end. She also said as well at the end of her message, Brie, she said one of her favourite quotes I'm guessing from me that I said in August

2021. I don't remember saying this and I'd like you guys to maybe enlighten me as to why I would have said this. She said, quote, I think it's more of a Vivaldi situation for the perineum. Dan Webby, 2021. I don't know why.

I don't know what those words are. So Vivaldi was like a composer. 2021. Which is so funny because 2021 was when the show we worked together. So you said that trying to show off to me and Clint, which is embarrassing. Yeah, but why would I say that? No, Vivaldi situation you're referring to is the status of the Vivaldi browser. No? What does that mean? Vivaldi was a're referring to is the status of the Vivaldi browser. No?

What does that mean? Vivaldi was a composer back in the day, like a Beethoven of sorts. What? Why would you make that gag? I don't even, nobody knows who Vivaldi is. What was the P word? Peranium, which is like we use between your bumhole and your vaginal opening or your penis. The gooch.

The gooch. Yeah, that's commonly known as the gooch. So I don't know why I said that, but anyway, this podcast going out to the lovely Brie. Yeah, Brie, darling, you have to tell us. You have to tell us what the hell the context was with that because I think, do you know what I think we should do? Brie, I think we should go back to that exact show and like get the very first clips of me, Dan and Clint together before we were even a show.

Where Dan would be showing off. Let us know the date so we can find that. Because I don't have a clue as to what we did that day. I also wanted to talk a little bit in this podcast about a situation that happened between the three of us and Yaz earlier today. Oh yuck. Have you ever been in a situation where you

maybe it's workmates or not friends and one of you does something completely awkward, and it's so awkward that you can't even kind of refer to it. You can't even call them out for it because it's just disgusting. I've just been like, I just look down. I just look down and ignored everything happening from then on. So the situation was, let me paint the picture. So we're sponsored by a company called Zed.

They're a petrol station. They do pies. They do drinks. They're brilliant. An amazing brand. I live and we're sponsored by a company called Zed. They're a petrol station. They do pies. They do drinks. They're an amazing brand. I live and breathe them. I bleed coffee from Zed. I'm going to name my next child Zed. And so a couple of the executive team from Zed were in to come

and say hi to us. And they brought us some beautiful coffees. And Yaz, for whatever reason, was in the studio here chatting to us, like she does most mornings. I told her to stay, it's partly my fault I said you sit there and you stay and be a part of this Yaz so I'm taking some blame big mistake everybody had sort of been introduced

and then Yaz thought she would interject and the thing is there was two people from Zed and then there was three people from our company that I know, we all know their names they've been around for like 20 years. Yeah, and Yaz, instead of going, where are you

guys from? She said, where are you all from? Referring to also the people from our company, the Edge. Gestured towards those, the people that we know and work with, our colleagues. Where are you from? Like she'd never met them before. These people, we see them every day.

And she was thinking that they were from Zed. Yeah, I just looked down. Oh, my God. You could see their faces. I was like, yes, we work here. They didn't. They were very polite, and they kind of just brushed over the situation.

But, oh, my God. I couldn't. I wanted to die. I wanted to die. So, Leah, just let that be a lesson to anyone listening. Like, just know your colleagues. I mean, I'm rich coming from me, isn't it? I hardly know anyone's name.

Well, we were saying that as well about, like, how it seems like in this building we meet someone new every single day. And I'm terrible with looking names and faces. Terrible with names, better with faces. But I've had so many situations where I've gone up to someone and said, oh, hey, nice to meet you. And they're like We've already met I'm like Why do you need to say that Just fucking move on

Like Now Clint's been away today We just mentioned before His family's got gastro Do we call him Just to see how Yeah yeah Okay

Okay so we'll go Quickly to him And see if he'll be back tomorrow Because last I heard He hadn't contracted it It was just his family So it'll be interesting To see if he's now vomiting and pooing as well or whether he will be in our midst tomorrow.

Meg, I know you don't want him anywhere near you with a baby. Oh, God, no. Yeah. With the baby puke? How does that work? Go back to school. Okay. I didn't learn about that.

Oh, Clint. Are you shitting right now? Is he shitting right now? Clint? Who's going back to? Is he shitting right now? Clint Who's going back to school? What are you talking about? I heard you say go back to school Oh no I told Cal to go back to school

Because he asked me will the baby vomit inside me if I get gastro Brilliant That's the shit that we've been going through Come back That's what I'm pleasing You've got to come back You've got to come back Come back

Oh god I'm not. You've got to come back. You've got to come back. Come back. Oh, God. I'm not beating that top-level humour. No. Clint, it's like I've been working with Dumb and Dumber today, except... Oh, my God. If Dan's winning the IQ test here, you guys are in trouble. It would be a close fight between Meg and I, to be honest. Yeah.

How are you feeling? So, yeah, I haven't heard one fart since we've spoken to you, so that's a good sign. That's good. No, no, no. Jay's just rising out of bed now. She stopped vomiting this morning. That wasn't nice. Yeah, you're lazy.

Yeah. And she's been saying, Jesus, get this and get that, and can you put some more ice in my water? Oh, she's milking it. Love it. Yeah, and I've just been washing kids' clothes in their own cycle for obvious reasons.

Good man. Yeah, yeah. I want to wash that with the other dirty clothes because some of these clothes, if you're getting, when I'm putting down, are dirtier than others. Yes, okay. Oh, my God. What a nightmare.

Have you been wearing a mask? Yeah, have you been protecting yourself, especially since you've been looking after your wife who's been vomiting in your en suite? Washing my hands a lot. Yeah, good. Good, ma'am. And not letting her kiss me.

Okay. Oh, that must be hard. Not letting her. How is she keeping her hands off you? How is she doing that? Oh, my God. That's so weird. My gash has been lasting for three weeks.

You still can't go near me. Sorry about that, babe. Yeah, that's true. Oh, good to hear you're well, so hopefully you'll be back on deck tomorrow. Yeah. Yeah, I think people are starting to slowly move around again, so I'm hoping that we're all out of the woods and I've just got an iron gut to manage to somehow avoid it.

This fucks me up. Even his gut's good. His guts are hot as. Clem, we were thinking that maybe you could panel from Studio B and me and Dan will be in Studio A. We'll quarantine you for one more day. Unless the Edge wants to pay for hazmat suits for Meg and I. Yeah.

All this was absolutely just jinxed for me, and I've just been gloating about how I've been. Put it this way, I don't think we can trust Guestifart on Friday. No. No, Guestifart on Friday, absolutely not. It's going to be skipping a week. Yeah, okay, well, good to hear you. All right, Carly.

Missed you. Okay, see you. See you tomorrow. See you. See you, mate. Oh, well, there you to hear you Alright darling Missed ya Okay See ya See ya mate Oh, well there you go That's good I think that, let's call it there It's been a fun podcast

We've had no negativity I'm sorry, you don't get to make the decision Who does? Meg Thank you Cal Okay, well I was going to say If you said Cal, I'd be like You fucking

You what? No, it's okay. You do boss it up when Clint's not here. Have you guys noticed that? Have you, producers, have you noticed that Dan becomes more of a boss when Clint's not here? Do I? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I've noticed that.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry, cow, did I turn your mic on? Did I ask you to talk? See what I mean? This is tough yakking. turn your mic on? Did I ask you to talk? See what I mean? This is tough yakking. I don't recall asking you to say a breath of a word. I'll just get quiet back here. Cheers.

I believe the hierarchy and LePay goes executive producer and then Dan. Probably in the other announcers. It wouldn't surprise me. When Clint's not here, suddenly Dan's all. Big boy.

We're like lions. It's kind of like. Alpha's gone. Alpha's away for the day. Alpha's gone. I'm bloody humping everything that moves. Okay. All right.

Well, we'll see you guys tomorrow, Kel. Thank you again for coming in this morning. No worries. Let me help you leg again. Okay.