The Edge Breakfast - ONLYFANS cry baby!!

Episode Date: November 5, 2025

This is a podcast from Rover. Welcome to the podcast. That should have been cancelled before it even started. This is Clint Big and Dan's OnlyFans. Podcast, that is. Welcome to the OnlyFans, Clintana, Nash, London. Good to see you. Good to hear you.

Good to be in your ears. In the ear canals. Yeah, lovely and warm, isn't it? I need to get my ears cleaned out. Oh, have you had them suction? No, I get them syringed, not suction. I had them suction and it made me throw up through uncomfortable. Imagine that.

You've already got a shitty job where you're literally pulling goop out of people's ears and then your client vomits. That's the day you go, I'm done with a show actually. Yeah, if you're a doctor, I'll at least get in some money.

You know, though, you... Oh, not the ones in the mall. No, I go to a doctor. Me? I think I'm getting some rando. Oh, gosh, this guy. You go to a doctor, the air clinics. Yeah, yeah, that's what I'm going to do,

book into an actual air clinic. Yeah, and I went there once and they pulled out like this huge bit Gunk, because radio announcers, because we always wear headphones. We actually get a lot of builder. I think I've got a photo of my last ear gunk that I got, actually. Yeah. And I remember walking out of the hearing clinic, and I heard a leaf blow across the road.

Yes. It's amazing. I remember being like, I've got superhuman hearing. Your hearing is, like, insane afterwards. It's crazy. You have the worst hearing because you're wearing headphones. Like, these earphones, all those openers and sounds, four hours a day. Actually, you know what one of the best feelings is getting one of those candle ones?

They're very bad for you, you know. Are they? But it feels like, oh, my God. You can almost feel the wax lifting out of your ear weirdly. Because I asked the doctor who syringed my ear, I asked by the ear candle. She's like, absolutely not. Very easy to burn your eardrum.

Yeah. But if it's done, if you don't have a disaster like that, it's pretty good. Anyway, so what were you talking about? I was just going to say, so there was someone that messaged the other day on the Edge Podcast fam. You can text FAM to 3343 if you want to join as well. And she said, can we please have Sven, have a special only fan. I do miss Sven. We haven't heard from Sven in a while

I don't know I guess Carl has got his detail so we'll try and get him on I don't know how we do but maybe in the next few weeks we can get a call with Sven or something I think I've got his people's number

or email or something your people start talking to Sven's people and then we can see what we can do but just know we're working on that and maybe we'll we see you and there was a lot of people that commented being like yes I'd love to hear from Sven again oh really how many

15. Wow, that is a bit of 13 more than I thought. Yeah. Yeah, there was, Libby said, please, where's Linda gone as well? Who's Linda? She's the psychic reader we get in sometimes as well. I think she came in the very start of my...

She always wears the same dress. I would like to get a psychic in general in. I've got some questions. We used to have a psychic come in, eh? What was her name? Were they good, though? I saw Linda actually, like, around the office earlier. I could get her in if you want.

No, I don't think she's a very good psychic, though. Oh, you haven't seen her? I haven't seen her. Weird that you've seen her. I'm definitely seen her. She's giving her a little wink because she walked past the glass booth. We know she has done stuff with Clint before. Sexually.

Yeah, I think she had a lot with him. I don't remember it. She maybe was a past life. Or maybe she put a spell on you at the end. Yeah. I think it was so good. He just went into some sort of tracts. Trance, exactly.

Have you had your teeth whitened in sweet babes? No. I've heard them widened in years. Show me how white that. I can't. I can't widen them because. I've got that cap, and they said that the cap won't whiten, so it'll just make the cap stand out even more.

So I haven't been able to do it. Why did you knock your tooth out? How, sorry. I punched him. He put David Schwimmer at a B, I mean in an A, and I was like, I'm not having that. Yeah, he was. No, I think it was a bit more lame than that.

I think I ended up just biting down on a fork. Oh, just fucking too hungry. Just calm down, A. Two bang. Well, actually, maybe that's not how I initially did it, but that's how I ended up re-breaking it. Fair enough. You know, actually, while we're speaking of whitening, can I just say,

I got these tooth whitening strips, and this is not even sponsored, but they're, I think it's called the Whitening Co or something, but God, they're good. I haven't used them in a while, but I remember when I used them, it's like they'd gone to a professional tooth whitening place. Yeah. I always wonder about the chemicals, though. Apparently they're fine.

I remember years ago when we did it, they'd be so sensitive. They were so sensitive. I was like, what have they done, like, to make them white. Yeah, that's what my friends said. Something... Not worth it, as far as I'm concerned. What you can do is just make your face darker. And it makes your teeth...

No, I haven't made my face darker either. He's lying about one of them. I haven't spritzed in probably about three weeks. Really? Are you just naturally... I'll only do my face if I'm also doing my body and I haven't been able to tan my body because I got my tattoo done.

And you can't tan and then you can't tattoo over tan. You don't need tan. If that's your natural skin color, you don't need to tan. You're tanorexic if you're looking at yourself. Yeah. Tanerexie. Never heard that. Never heard that.

Well, when you think you're wider than you are? Exactly. Yeah, but we're in the dark here, like out in the bright sun. I did sunbat yesterday, not my face, obviously, but I was so sunny. It was 28 degrees, so it went into my yard, just in my brown undies. I just lay there for about an hour and was just having to have the sun on my body. Imagine popping over. Ash is just out there, just in all their gory.

Yeah, all random poppins. Okay, if someone randomly knocked, good, hello, hey Ash, do you go, oh well, Only me. How do you jump up and run? No, no. If I brown and he's on. Just a bikini, exactly. And I'm so at the age now where I just could not give a fuck what people think about my body.

Yeah. I actually couldn't give a fuck. Smoking. I've heard it's smoking. It's not. It used to be. Now I'm like, whatever. I just don't care.

I don't care enough. I don't like that photo when you were interviewing Dooley. Do you think that was my hottest. And I, and you reeked on that day. That was the same weekend you shoved a coat can up your bottom for the bottom. Thank you for remembering. Yes. Not upper bottom, between her cheeks.

Between her cheeks. That and... She had hemorrhoids. I had like... That photo and knowing you had hemorrhoys at the same time, I was like, oh... But that's the thing, it's like, remember that. Next time you see someone that you think is so hot,

like they might have a bulging hemorrhoid. Yeah. I think you can never know who's got a hemorrhoid. I mean, Jonathan Bailey might have had a hemroid when he did the hottest man photos, you know? You just never know. I hope not because he's gay. And I would imagine they're having a hemorrhoid interferes with his sex life if you're gay.

Maybe that is... How do you get rid of it? Maybe gay people get more hemorrhoids than others. No, I don't think it's from... friction, though. It's from internal things like digestion and constipation and straining. And how do you get it to shoot back up? Cream, but

for me it's just like I had to just fix my diet and really, lots of fibre, water. Did it a lot of coke? It kind of shrinks. When I got pregnant though, soon after. And cola. Pregnaces. Yeah. So that moment, looking back, you don't

think there's been a hotter moment of the Duleepe interview? I never have been because I don't like my hair there. I guess you didn't peek. My body was good there. You were peaking. I was in the general peak. When would my peak, Hottess be? Probably like one of the awards shows I went to when I was like, you know. But can't you be like volatile stocks?

You know, like they'll have their peak, sure, but they're still kind of going up and down. And you never know. Week to week as well. Next year, you can have a new high. You know, I honestly, and I'm not just talking shit out of my ass. Because I don't know if I'm going to have another baby or not. You don't want to get a new him or whatever could do too much of that. I can't commit to hard-core fit spoke because I'm like, well, it's just means I'll lose weight

and then put on weight to have a baby. Maybe it's more stretching. The second I decide I'm done, you fucking watch. There will be signs. Because I go ham. I will be like gym twice a day. I get very focused. I'll do it.

Yeah, yeah. I'll do like a cardio, then I'll separately do like weights. And I'll just go and I will be so hot and I know I will. However, I've never attempted hotness at this age. And hormonally, I'm a very different person than pre-kids. Couldn't imagine leaving the germ. like, you know, in that feeling going yes, tick that off of the day

and knowing you're going to be going back there later on that same day. So I might do Pilates. I would always do a slower. It's like a Pilates a yoga, a stretch class or like a... I can't just do it all on one go. I just don't trust myself to go back. In my mind there's separate things. But that was when I was

like working an hour a day. That's I think what I had when I had my V, you know, my gutters. I remember I would go for a run. I'd go for a run in the morning and then I'd go to the gym in the afternoon. So I guess that's the same thing. But there is no better feeling than walking out of the gym knowing you're done for the day.

Like, just done it. Especially on a Friday because I just don't train weekends. I'm like, eh, have the weekends off. And I don't want to, and I've just made that my rule. So I don't feel guilty if I've got a bit of time on a Sunday being like, oh, I should squeeze a gym, work out. No, weekends I don't work out. That's so important.

Yeah. And I normally, like, in football season, I got sport on Saturday and stuff anyway. But you leave on a Friday. No, I don't have to go back until Monday. And we've started a final walk. Like, Adrian comes home from work at around five. and I have buddy ready and he might hop on his bike

and we're in the part of the kite and we walk for half an hour just chatting because buddy's always but if we're walking he's looking around he just lets us talk and we have a walk we fly the kite and we did walk home and it's so heaven just to get fresh air

it is lovely yesterday in Auckland where we are but I think it was a lot of the country yesterday beautiful day it was one of the most stunning days I witnessed we walked and got pizza Yeah, it was warm but not too hot, not a cloud in the sky. It was almost too hot for me.

Yeah, I went down for a walk on the beach about 5pm after dinner, and it was fucking bliss. Did you put your feet in the water? I did, yeah, walked along the beach. And the thing that the weather was lovely, the ocean was lovely, but the thing that I really loved and I had to go, how lucky am I, is just all the people down there. It makes me want to get emotional thinking about it. But just all the, like, I know, Cliffs. It's becoming me. It's becoming me.

I know. I know. Meg and I, when we open that tap, well, you should have been careful. Because Dan didn't cry in 10 years and we made our mission over a week to try and make him cry. Sorry to hijack your story for a second, Dan.

To give you context, we literally wrote this sad song, like a country song, and about, from the perspective of Dan's toy pig that is watching Dan grow up and realizes now he's the pig on the shelf because Dan's grown up and left him.

It's parenthood, though. Once you have a child, Trump's all this lame stories about pigs. No, no, no. Well, he still has his pig, though. And he doesn't really... Right? And then his mum gave us photos of him as a baby growing up with his brother and his mum, and we had

them like a montage, like they had to a funeral. So we had the montage of photos and the song talking about how, like, pig's okay with Dan's got a kid and a wife now and he's okay being put on the shelf, watching Dan because he's so proud of him. And Dan, like, genuinely cried for the first time forever. Now he fucking always cries.

I don't cry, though. I don't get tears falling down my face. But I think it's nice and I think we're similar in this at moments of humanity connection when you look around you realize how lucky you are seeing people living their lives that is very, very emotional. That's what it was for me just walking down there

and going fuck how lucky we that we can walk down the beach and just see these people like families, couples, people walking by themselves, dogs running around it was just joyous. Living a beautiful, wonderful safe lives joyous. Producer Neeps, can you try and see if you can dig up the song? Maybe we'll end the podcast with it. For anyone who's new

New word to the show I won't cry again Yeah we won't subject Ash to the full song But anyone who wants to hear it Can listen And if you don't You can always tap out

Before the song starts And it was like the song I don't know what we would have called it It was like a song That to make Dan cry Something to do with his big Search Cowboy Country I wish you'd come up with a better name

Song to make Dan cry While he's getting that Where is the M Energy Room? Any ideas? I don't know what the hell you're talking about Upstairs I just think I'll just...

Why are you going there? Yeah, do you? Oh, we're a job interview. With the big boss. Oh, the big boss. It's either, when are you going with the big boss? It's either bad news. Or sex.

No, it's not my husband, the boss. It's his boss. Oh, I thought he was taking her up to a meeting room, Just Ash. Oh my God, imagine if you found out of the age and I've been fucking at work. That's odd. Is it your husband going in? Or is it just you and the big boss?

It's me and a big boss and I think... Oh, you hope it's not sex there. No offense to Leon, but no thank you. You should be filing. some sort of like HR thing. Or he should be filing it against me if I initiated it. Yeah. Imagine that. I mean, you should be

utilising that. Like, booking out a meeting room and having a secret meeting, oh my God, if my wife was the boss, I'd be desperately asking for that every week. You would, but you'd be asking for it even if she was like... You know that's a horrible offence? If someone walks in, you're fucking in the... No, but there are like meeting rooms with like locks and she's my boss.

If we get caught, we'd both get fired. It's half the fun. Until we have no wages and can't pay the rent. They can't fire you for having sex with your spouse at work. They can. Of course they can. Of course they can. But if you're not doing it like in the middle of the foyer where everyone can see.

It doesn't matter. It's a workplace. You can't have sex at the workplace. Produce a car. Yeah, that actually didn't go too well for a couple of staff members at this institution. I feel married. Like if you're married, what are they going to find me with having sex with my wife? Like indecent exposure or something.

Remember that if no one's seeing it, like they just find out, oh, you had sex with your husband. in a meeting room. It's like you're on the work's time you're getting paid to be. We all get lunch breaks. Do you remember that famous couple that was like a famous story they were filmed having sex in a high-rise building and it was in an office thing and it was like a down country somewhere and they both got fired. Someone was working

construction and they could see over like in the office and they were like zooming in and they were banging. But were they married? I don't know what the ins and outs of it were. I think he might have been doing the dirty. The ends and out of the world. Yeah, yeah. But they both got lost their jobs because of it. Guys, there's some kumara brownie left over

If ever any other ones That's Kumara Kumara I just while we're in the topic Wanted to brag I once did it in one of the road runners The old ones Oh

With hiding or someone else Yeah, no, with my wife Yeah I had a passion of rock cute once Hell yeah Oh with Raj Yes We don't talk about that

That's how I got my job at the road He was like What can I do, Roger? The news came out last week That's why he's gone on sabbatical Was it old now? He's got names to pressure. I'm fair that you told me about someone who,

a woman who got caught in one of the work vehicles and a guy was going down. Oh, that's a famous, well, it's not a famous story, but it is one of the best radio stories I've ever heard. I can't tell it. Is it an urban legend though? No, it's been told to me by the best friend of the person who saw it.

Oh, man. Okay, I'm going to go. This is a wild west. Okay, we'll get out of here and we'll leave you. Hopefully with the song the producing Nipura is found. of us trying to make Dan cry a song from the perspective of his pig enjoy

Neepi is saying he hasn't got it enjoy it okay well it's not there so here it is you won't be able to enjoy it enjoy the song oh here it is good good on you neeps you're one of the best there is he fucking didn't find it

really earning some money today aren't I we did play it literally very recently yeah oh no we're about to play it right now he hasn't okay guys enjoy the podcast, here it is. If you're wondering why there's still two minutes to go on this podcast

it's because here it is. It's not as longer than two minutes. Okay, well maybe he hasn't found it. Maybe this is it, hold on. Made my wife cry once as well. After the deed. Is that a good thing or a bad thing? Actually, now that you say that, I'm not sure.

Oh, because you thought I was that good, baby. You are welcome. Whatever. It was just so quick. You know, that one wasn't it? What about this one here? Let me... My first ever job was at a petrol station.

This guy brought his boat in. I started filling it up. and I put it in a hole which I thought was the fuel for the cat. But it was one of the rod holders. And I just filled up his whole boat's hull with 91 petrol. He cried. The last thing. No, that's not either.

I'll find it. Give me three seconds to, well, I hear it as it got it. Want something done right? Fuck on. Enjoy guys. close as friend I tore to everyone else was all I am

Dan held me tired when he go to bed and it rest me in his hand Through the years I've watched him grow From a boy who cry when he would fall To a man who'd face a world so bold I'm just a tour who's seen it

Or at least that's how I remember Now he's grown moved on a dusty shell for me And I might be just a distant memory A time seems short as he falls For a girl named Tanna A smile at Dano It's the end of our journey Your world fell apart

As we drove to the vet I tried to pray But I'm just a toy Watch your hold tinks pour She slowly slipped away The box to warm as you wiped your tear and drove home to dig her grave I was there to be held rail

tired and for days you squeezed away but your time to change it Now you're grown moved on a dusty shelf And I might be just a distant memory It's your time And I'm proud for the world to see A smile at 10 It's the end of our journey

The years of love Have taken It's whole I'm torn But I'm still here Pick for you and you were born Just an old toy pig Ratty and falling apart It's the corner of shit

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