The Edge Breakfast - ONLYFANS does it lead to your massive vagina?

Episode Date: November 6, 2025

This is a podcast from Rover. Dumb chat, bad decisions, zero shame. If that sounds like your vibe, you're in the right place. This is Clint Megan Dan's OnlyFans. Podcast, that is. Welcome to The Only Fans with Clint Dan and Ash London. What's funny, Dan? Oh, I'm just watching a reel of the, um, it won't actually translate on the podcast.

But you know, when you're at a restaurant and you're really hungry and you've made your order, and then you see your order getting brought out, but it's for an, another table. They're walking up to you and you're like, here it is. And they walk past. There's no worse feeling. And you feel like such a dickhead. No, I think what's worse is when you're like, oh, do I go the steak?

Or do I go the chicken? And then you're like, uh, I'll do the chicken. And then you see the steak come out for another table. You're like, damn it! And you have food envy. That's what I go into the restaurant. Always have food envy. Quite often and I'll go and I'll look around what other people are eating.

That's actually good. And then sometimes if they're a table near us, I might go, what did you order? Yeah, I always say, is it good? Would you recommend it? Do you? Always. Otherwise, just eat at those fancy restaurants that have pictures on the menu. Oh yeah, that's good.

Oh, you're Denny's. As you know, I'm obsessed with our local Thai place. It's just opened up. We went again last night. Keep saying to my wife, I was like, next time we do takeaways, we've got to go to this Thai place that Ash is talking about down the road. It's unbelievable. So now because I love them so much and they're so kind,

when I am there, if people start to walk past, because it's a little place, if they walk past, because it's new, they'll look at the menu, they'll kind of look inside. I don't know every single time. I'm like, guys, trust me. You want to get the boat noodles. You want to get the Tom Yum porn.

It's delicious. You're like the chick outside holding the signs running in the car. Pretty much. I'm telling everyone. I'm telling all my neighbors. I put it in a street WhatsApp group. I'd be so pissed off. I didn't like it.

I'd be like that fucking bitch that was there. She said it was good. They will like it. That's unbelievable. You know what else is really funny. I find when I go into a restaurant, I never go to these ones that have the, like, food. Not only do they have the photos of the food, but they have them like the plastic version of it.

And the girls are like in the air. It's like shiny. in Japan, every single restaurant would have all the food and plastic out the front. And the ones that were bad would kind of be a little bit dusty, like they're dust. It would just be like, guys, come on. Because it makes sense, because you're basically showing you what you get, right?

Especially if you don't speak Japanese. Yeah, but I guess then that's sort of weird knowing that that's plastic. I don't know. But they're not going to serve you that, you know. Not appetising, is it. My little guy, Thai, he was funny because we love Thai food and every time we'd go, he'd be like, this is my restaurant, Dad. But nobody.

Tye's named after Thai food. That's how much Clint loves it. It doesn't have a T-A-I. That's how he spells his name. No, embarrassingly, he's named after Ty Pennington. I always forget who that is. With the host of Extreme Maker of a home edition.

Move the bus. Move that bus guy. If they haven't had another baby, it's going to be called Green Curry. How much they love a Thai. And with that show, whenever they do the follow-ups, people can't afford the electricity

and like all the power that generates and everything. Yeah, what do they do? Do they give them some sort of like lump sum or some, do they get to like live mortgage or rent-free for the next I don't know, but I'd be, like, selling that house the next day, as is. Yeah. I mean, there's a lot of people that are living like that at the moment, isn't there, you know, that are living week to week. Of course.

I do it sometimes as well. Like, I'll, I leave my phone payment to, like, the last minute, sometimes even late, like, a week late until I get the text that's like, you are. You have no help and go on gets disconnected because I didn't pay my bill. Yeah. Sometimes I even leave it till I get a, like, fee. Like, they'll be like, you've got a late fee. I mean, I'll leave it. I'll leave it, like, I'll leave it, like, another month.

That's so crazy. I'll get an email and I want to get rid of my emails. As soon as I get an email, and I'll be like, oh, you've got a bill for blah, blah, blah. It's due in three weeks. I'll jump straight onto internet banking. I'll lock it in the amount and it'll say it's due 28th of November, so I'll select 28th of November.

So it's paid on the due date. And I'll schedule it. And then I, and so the email's gone. No, no, no. No, no. I'll get an email from 1NZ and they'll be like, hey, just a reminder, you haven't paid your bill. And it's due in two days.

I'm like, bitch, I know. I've already set up a scheduled payment like three weeks ago. Go away. I don't know if I'm going to have money in my account three months from now. No, but then I'll regularly check, go, what's coming out this week? Why don't you just pay it when the bill comes in? Too much. No, because then if you're paying the bill before you need to,

then you're getting rid of money that you could be offsetting your mortgage with in the leader. I think of your bills that's worth having it in there for three extra weeks. But if you do it all the time, then surely over your life offsetting it. I got the call last week. I've paid it since, but I got a call last week for. from Spark and it goes like those automated ones. It goes, hello, this is a recorded message from Spark. Your bill

is overjured. That's when you know you have to pay it. Oh, we got this week. We thought it was a scam, but then I rang them. We got three parking fines, like traffic violations in Italy. We never got, like the rental car company never sent us a copy of the bill. They just, I don't know, referred

it to like a debt collector in Australia. Three bills at $700. each. But I mean, what do you do is when it's in a different country? I mean, what are they going to do? Does it just mean if you don't pay it? You can never go back to Italy? And what happens if you don't pay, like, when you get to the border,

will they be like, oh, you've got three unpaid Parkinson's, you need to pay them before we'll leave you into the country? I always wonder how they can chase you. I think sometimes they can depole it and get it when you go into Europe. I'd love to know anyone who works in, like, if you listen to this podcast, you work in immigration. Like when you are owed money in a country, is that. where you get us at the border, or is it just one of those things?

You can do whatever you want, another country, and you come back to New Zealand. They're just hoping you pay it, and that's why they send it to you, but they can't really chase you. You know, if your fines get bad enough in New Zealand and you try to leave the country, they'll make you pay at the border leaving. My friend back in Australia, who's a key, we had unpaid, like, hex, like university debt that had got, like, out of control, and they can't come back to visit New Zealand because they won't be allowed out again. Yeah. It's disgusting. It's crazy, eh?

Yeah, so I think they let you out a lot of the, but when they're really overdue and stuff, they don't hear you out. We've got this text, because we're recording this podcast while we're still doing the show. We're back on in three minutes. You don't need to worry about that. But we got this text from Nicola.

Do we just cold call her and see if she picks up? She said, hey team, my 20-year-old son, Finn, is studying in California on a soccer scholarship. He is a superstar, but he's coming home for Christmas, which I'm ecstatic about. I had to borrow money for his airfare to get him home, which I'm paying back. I know how much he wants to go to R&V with his mates,

but I can't afford it. And he can't ring from the US, but I told him I would try this morning. Do we just cold call her when we're back on air? That sounds lovely. She seems like a lovely mum. Do you want me to check if she's won prizes before? Yeah, can we check first?

Because sometimes, you know, people are good at making. Well, it's like we had, like, Caitlin Africa, who sent her a great story for the show this morning. Could have got her on for R&V tickets, but she won 10,000 bucks last week. So you want to come to spread and share the love. Yeah. I can have a look.

Yeah, well, people probably don't know we can do that. And we can even click on your angry texts. And sometimes people just haven't a bad day. But we can click history. And if all your texts are quite angry, scathing, just really negative. It's like, you know what? We just don't need that vibe on the show. And then we can just block you for a day or we can block you forever.

That's why. You know, if it's one random text where you go, Dan sucks or whatever, it's like sometimes we don't understand. They could be like, lo, Dan, Dan sucks. And that's kingy in which case, all of the texts are Dan suck a deal, but we love him for it. No, I actually like Nicola, because she's texted through previously, I'm with Dan on this. I don't know what, she just put me on. If it's the A list, didn't we are not calling that?

Yeah, yeah, I probably was. But, like, she's, I can't see any history of her winning a prize. It's probably my Achilles. Wait, no. What's the, um, something he'll. Leave him. Achilles heel? Yeah, I'm saying Archilles, but you say Achilles.

Yeah, but then Achilles heel is the saying, right? But then weirdly I'd say Achilles. Interesting. But yeah, a solo mum who can't afford things for her kids That's the thing people will get money out of me For every day of the week I know how hard it is first hand

You do as well as to like witness a solo mum Having to make ends meet And like doing two jobs We're looking after kids at the same time It's the world's hardest job Totally and I used to present my mum for it And then I'm growing up and I'm like, how they're right Okay well we're going to jump back into the live show

And call Nicola and see how we go No time will pass for you but we'll come back And we'll let you know how it went with Nicola The Matrix guys. Nicola was very, very thankful for anyone. Oh, no, she was an asshole. I didn't deserve it, to be honest. She said that when she said goodbye to her son of the airport

to send him to university, it was the hardest day of her life, and I just cannot imagine. It would be. Because he'd be so proud, it's so hard-broken. Do you think at that point, though, you've had 20 years with them or whatever, it was 18 years, and you want them to leave, obviously.

Maybe there will be some people that would be like, get out, my mum was a bit like that. Off you go, she made me go to London. She's like, you should definitely go. Yeah.

We've got his number if you want to ring him. Oh yeah. Give him a call in California. I just be like, hey, mate, your mum's just won your double-passed R&V. What time is it in Los Angeles?

Yeah, so I've got his, yeah, she said he'll probably be awake because he's going to late training soon, but we could try him. It's an American number. Do you guys want to give it again?

I'll bring it through and off. Punch it in me. 1240 pairs. Did he know this was happening today? Did he? He's seen it online, maybe? Like, he knew about the competition. Okay.

He didn't know that his mum was going to call. Yeah, that his mum was going to be. Okay. So we'll just see what happens. Lovely. That'd be so cool if your mum's like, hey, you know that thing you really love, Clint? Got your tickets.

I'm like, what? The fact that getting tickets is incredible. It's the fact that you find out your mum's been trying to, like, sitting on hold and texting in all morning, like trying to get it done and there was no guarantee that actually it was even going to happen. My mum would be like, I caught your tickets to the Hillsong Conference.

Houselsohn Conference. Yeah, Hosanna. Hosanna. Hosener in a... I'd love to be able to say. What about this one? My Jesus, my Savior. Lord, there is none like you.

We've got Nicola as well on hold so we can do a little bit of a reunion. Oh, this would be lovely. Okay. We'll see if we get him on first. Should we get Nicola to do the honours and tell him? No, let's. It's too complicated. We'll just tell him. Vark, okay, try to make a moment.

Hey, I'm calling now. What's his name again? Finn. Finn. Cool name. Yeah, Finn Ryder. That is a cool name. I'm from Tangled. Yeah.

You know, like Flynn Rider and Tangled. Yeah, it is actually, but I don't want to correct me. Also, I forgot. Hello? Finn! Finny! Kiyora, how are you, Finn? Guess who it is?

I'm good, thank you, how are you? Who is it? Guess. He's not good. Is it the edge? Yeah, it's good. Yeah, it's good. Yeah, it's cool.

Dan and Ash London, bro. We also got your mom, Nicola, here on the podcast with us. A bit of a reunion. Hi, Finn. Hi, Mom, how's it going? Hey, how's it going? I'm good. Who's the girl we can hear in the background, Finn?

The girl. No, I'm just on campus at my... Oh, okay, good, good. There was a little trap for you to see. It's all good, Nicola, he's safe. The given him trying to lead him straight from his soccer scholarship in his professional football career. How would you feel about going to R&V?

I mean, I love it, obviously. Your mum's an absolute legend. She's been calling all morning, and she texts in as well, saying, oh, please, can I get a dull pass for my son to go to R&V? so she scored you a double pass with camping so you want to make a suss for New Year's bro oh thank you so much oh you're very much should be thanking mum

yeah your mum's a legend yeah thank you mum you're welcome you're welcome you're welcome I'm so happy for you and thank you for this it's amazing it's so cool oh no worries and we hear that you're doing very well over in the States Finn oh thank you guys

what's your dream what team do you want to play for team I haven't thought too much into it I mean I'm just keeping keep playing as the main goal I was really after they graduate Where do you play? What position?

Left winger Right okay Because this will be such a cool interview to still have When all of a sudden They say you're playing main United Or whatever in like three or four years And we were like

Yo that's Finn who we had on the podcast And then we can't get you for an interview Because you're too bloody famous And your fucking publicist Won't give us your number Yeah But we've got Nico's number You know it's better than a publicist to play his mum.

That's right. We got Liam Lawson's mum on the show the other day. You know, Finn, you're probably living Clint's dream. Because I think you sort of had a different life around that time when Finn was the same age when you were his age. I mean, regardless of how it ends up shaking out for you, like to have a path that could lead to a professional football career. It's just like one of the greatest, personally for me, the greatest, like, road you could be hidden down. And football is so chic.

Yeah. It is. It's the coolest sport, isn't it? It's cool. It's like the hottest bodies. Yeah. It's definitely better than Babington or something, eh?

Fuck. Yeah. Well, good on you, Finn. We are cheering you on. We love you and Nicola and we just can't wait to see where life takes you. But one place we do know

it will be taking you is R&V over New Year's. Good on your buddy. Stay on the 0% bears, mate. Your body's a temple. That's right. Don't vaid. All right.

Thank you so much. Guys, really appreciate it. Thank you, thank you. No worries. See us, Vin. See, Nicola. And, yeah, I have the best reunion. When you finally get back to New Zealand, Finn.

Thank you. I know. I can't wait. All right. Thank you, guys. Love you, Mom. Love you, Mom. Oh, he's gone.

Oh, no. These girls waiting for him. Yeah, yeah. He's not in front of the girls. I actually think it was the boys, though. That's uncool, isn't it? Hi, Nicol, have a great weekend. Thank you so much for listening to the show.

Thank you so much I really appreciate it guys See you mate I love Finzel American accent That he's developed as you hear that He must have been there for a while if that's Yeah but it's when you're young and everyone's American All right we're back on air in 35 seconds

Hold there team We're coming back We're going to come back for guest to fart Do we need to? It's a Friday All right we'll pause the podcast And then we'll debate it Do it quick one now

That was Ash God she's good Oh okay These guys Mobile, this guy comes over in a bat Water Blasters, fucking hate him These guys Floor bleach

He's just going to laugh about Me getting my ass bleached Live on ear They were just talking about it He's never got to get that fucking sticky stuff off somehow, can't We're on the podcast again Some of that's not booed

I've never got my butt bleach Just say Oh, whatever Sometimes it's funnier to just You know Let you guys have your life I think offered you a freebie. You would.

You would. No, I don't even, I wouldn't even want my wife, you know, staring at that for, you know, an extended period of time. Dan's about to sky. Here we go, like, a poor, imagine if you're the beauty. It'd be a place you'd have to go one and done. I don't think you could get an anal bleaching and then go back there again. They'd be like, this is it. I can never meet you again.

Hi, Linda, well, thanks for coming in today. I've just done your balm. I've got all the hair from that. While I'm down here, just want me to just rub some bleaching over your an. Is that what they do? Yeah You just get actual Like hair bleach

It would be like a I don't know It would be some sort of bleach No but when they bleach your head Sometimes you can get it around Like the top of your forehead Right And you're got to be careful

Because it can burn your skin Yeah But it doesn't bleach your skin Like around your forehead It would be a special skin bleaching thing Like it would be Whatever change the skin God there's got to be so uncomfortable

When you leave That's literally like bleached And burnt your skin To change its colour Imagine what your ass it feels like It's purely painless Does Do you want it

We'll do it for free. We'll do it for free. It's painless. It'll take two minutes. Free? Is it a sponsored? Free? No, you don't even need to sponsor.

I don't have put anything on my story? No, you just need to go. Thank you for all your continued support of Casey Clinic. All you need to say is thanks for Casey for doing my waxing today and my Botox and something a little extra. They do a numbing cream with it. Anal bleaching can cause mild discomfort such as stinging or a burning sensation, but it's not typically described as painful, especially when performed by a professional with numbing cream. Still not really all that keen.

producer carl done it he's got his hand up oh they use a laser oh it's a laser can't be any worse than a decent curry coming through wouldn't it like a bit of sweet Thai chili ring piece maybe if you want to cheat bleaching you can just have a really hotline

which controversially I like a good sting like is am I doing it on he likes a good sting there's something about it yeah I've had laser on my arms in my throat that wasn't fun in chest but laser hair removal

so it's kind of like that but on your butt hole your ring piece yeah I don't like a hairy chest strangely my mum loves it so maybe there's some weird thing there and she used to always get annoyed that she'd be like oh your father's got doesn't got any hair on his chest and she just like loved a hairy chest and dad didn't have one and I was like mate I'm getting rid

of all mine and so the alternative was her son's hairy chest no I mean and then we did that thing member where why the fuck did this happen we lined me up with a bunch of shirtless guys and mum had to come in blindfold and put her hands on the chest and arms

of these gentlemen to try and work out which one was me and then I remember her going that's clink because he's got no hero on his church he goes to he doesn't have a very chest did you get your pubes lasered uh oh down to like you know like they'll do your snail trail and you got no snail trail

see you later that's fucked what about other parts down there like have you had anything else done down there or is it just the Nah, just when you get it so that it just goes down below your short. Why would you not keep your snail trail? What? I get rid of all the hair and I just keep this hairy snail trail.

I'm real sad for you. That's fine. That's fine. Do you have a snail trail down? Yeah. Well, there you go, you can never look at this? No, I'm not showing me. Yeah, come on.

No, because then you'll know the path to where it leads. I don't want anybody else to know where it goes. I think he actually knows where it goes. It's like the yellow brick road. Yeah. Goes down. Hannah's Dorothy. Hannah's Dorothy with little pigtails.

Have I had to have a guess, does it go down to your giant vagina? Good from you. Okay. I call it Oz. Here we go. I thought that I'll leave you with tear the eyes. Guess the thought wants that to be gone. The wicked thing.

Oh. Guess the fuck. Okay. Bloody hell Did he have fucking bake beans for lunch If I can pull that off I'd be pretty proud Okay no I'd do it again

There we go Okay I'm gonna go As you talk about it I can feel the bubble moving down my tummy I'm gonna go Oh god It's not gonna be that Oh okay

Hold on Yeah he often does ones like that Producers look like the sad Like they're missing out Yeah go on here let's do a full way Hang on, I'm going, a... Oh, Jesus. It's just, just been bleached.

Yeah, true. Not a lot of wind resistance, I'm going. Okay. A little bit extra at the end. This is real tight. Mine was a bit looser. I know that Mike couldn't go down low enough. That was pretty much...

That's not real. Halfway between my first long one. and neediest why I pitched one? It's so impressive. It's not red in the face style. It was like a balloon. It felt like I just had a vape.

I think of mystery for us to wonder. Oh. Guess the fuck you guys. Thanks for hanging out with us this week. Yep. You are fucked. Do you? That is one of.

Dan, always guess that. I think he gets so angry at the end. Like he doesn't know the magic trick. No, I know the magic trick. I just don't know how you just can just do that. Like, if I wasn't so disgusted, I'd be impressed. But unfortunately the disgustedness overpowers the impressiveness.

Tight anewse, though, eh? I don't know what to say. Yeah, good on you. Thank you, John. One of the tightest anewses I've ever heard. See you. I'd be proud. Rover, Music, Radio, podcasts.