The Edge Breakfast - ONLYFANS Hokitika... How about it?

Episode Date: November 2, 2025

This is a podcast from Rover Come for the chat, stay for the trauma bonding This is Clint McGinn-Dan's Only Fans Podcast, that is... Hello, welcome to the Only Fans with Clint-Dan and Ash London Welcome back, Ash, to the Only Fans too. I'm happy to be here, guys, I miss you every second. You misguess the fart too.

Oh, do you make to do it? Yep. That's nice. She actually won it. That's her favourite segment. Yes, it's my least favourite thing that we do. Yeah, same with me. I'm, to be honest.

And not because of the fart. It is because of the fart. I'm not a big fart guy. I don't like it anyway. Well, I tried to stop doing it and then you guys got all annoyed and then people jumping on the Facebook page and like, what the hell? We've got to give the people what you want, don't you?

I think they love it because they're not in the room. But are they like anti-vaxxers, fart people? They're just the most vocal when really most people are like, take it away of us. Well, that's the worry, isn't it? Yeah. This podcast is going out to Bridget Martin Davis, gorgeous. Who's a member of the podcast.

Fam. And you can also be a member of the podcast, fam, as you text. Fam to 3343. We'll send you back a link to that. And you can be behind the scenes, all the news about the show. When someone's getting fired, you'll be the first to know. Oh, who's getting fired next? I don't know. Well, technically me. Well, you're not fired. You're choosing to leave.

I'm not choosing to leave. I can't stay. Oh, yes, because of me. But you came into this job knowing that there'll be an end. There wasn't like stay forever. And now they've just said, actually we changed our mind. You've got to leave in December. when you do maternity cover in a normal job

and then the lady actually comes back for maternity leave and you're like, fuck off bitch, it's my job! You can't do that with the maternity cover. I think what happens a lot of the time as well in businesses, they will go off on maternity leave and then quite enjoy this new change and doesn't really feel right to go back and then so often the maternity leave cover

ends up being... Leaving, they just leave. Yeah, they just... It's a maternity leave. I've got a lot of friends like that who are like, you get enough distance from your job that you realize you hate it. Actually, I hate all the people I work with

and I don't want to go back there. Or the partner's rich enough that you can just be like, oh, you know what, I won't go back to work. That must be nice, eh. What a dream. Where you could just be like, oh, I was going to go back, but I've decided not to. I'd love to be rich enough to not work.

Yeah. I love, yeah, if my wife was just, I'd love a sugar mama. I reckon if she picked up her makeup stuff, she could be able to support you. I've got two kids, I think I'll just have to pay for high school soon. Yeah. My brother's got four kids.

and the fourth one's about to start high school or private high school in Melbourne four children at once private high school Oh my mate was telling me in Sydney It's like 35 grand each So there's two kids that's 70 grand But then you think Okay that's actually $100,000 that you need to make

Because then you've got to allow for the tax to come out of that So you can have 70,000 to... Leftover after everything else So it's $100,000 on top of whatever you make Just to put your kids through school Oh, I was like, Jesus That was only two My mum's best friend, one of my mum's best friends, our family friend,

she worked for just to put her kids in, like her whole salary paid for her kids' education. There was a really cool trend that was going around. And if you're the person that doesn't have to worry about paying the mortgage because you're not the main income earner, you would go up to your husband or wife and go, hey, babe, I'm really sorry, I don't think I'm going to be able to make the mortgage this month and filming their reactions. And some of them were like, what?

They're like, you don't fucking pay the mortgage any month. Like, I'm doing that. And then there were some other partners that were a lot nicer going, that's all good, babe, I got you again this month. You know, like, inside into their relationships and how they would speak to each other. But the best trend at the moment is trying to see if he's ready for a baby. I saw a montage that's up on my story.

And it's just, the guy's like watching TV, and she will go and like cuddle up, put her face like on his chest. What he does realize is she's got milk. milk in her mouth and then she just goes and just like spits the milk out like a baby word and the dude's like

the fuck like it's like all over him and the girls are cracking up it's so funny I was showing Hannah that the other day that trend and she was like George never really did that

he never threw up like he was never a baby like vomitter weird eh then buddy he just like yeah and I think it's a common thing and it's annoying

when you're like breastfeeding and you just spent like two hours feeding them and then they just vomited up on you and you like you little mother

yeah Only did you just do that, but now you're going to be fucking hungry. Yes, and you won't sleep. Is it because they overfeed and literally their body just can't keep that amount of milking because they've... I don't know anything. That's reflux. That's what they call it. But you have one.

Yeah, but had. Now I've got a child on you forget everything. You forget. That's true. You do forget. Because you had two babies at ones. You were still in the baby zone. If someone handed me and you were like, even when I hold Miller, like, like Meg's Miller, I'm like,

am I holding it okay? I don't remember what to do. Yeah, I forget. I'm like, when do they fucking nap and eat? shit. I don't know anything. We're talking on the show today about Hokitika. Am I saying it right? Hawketika.

Yeah, Hokitika. Horka tica. And how it's a lovely small town in New Zealand on the west coast of the South Island. And it's traditionally been a bit of a sleepy hollow. But people are moving there in droves because of the, you know, there's jobs to go. There's a beautiful little township.

The best thing I saw when I was looking online that came up the most was work-life balance. The best work-life balance in New Zealand, supposedly. And I think you can do that if you come. maybe come from a big town like Wellington Christchurch, Auckland, it's cheaper to live in somewhere like Horka Tika because, you know, the houses are cheaper

so your mortgage repayments or rents, I guess, cheaper and so you can afford to have a lesser job and have more time to yourself. I thought we could call the local RSA there. And they can sort of sell A bit early, darling. Someone will be there. Someone will be there. That's nine. Nearly 10 a.m.

If it isn't RSA, I just think of them as a pub. but I guess they do more than just sell beer, right? Yeah, you know, fundraising, doing stuff. Yeah, if the bars open at 950.

I have got Helen Lash, the mayor of Horkatikas number as well, if we want to call her if you're going to say it don't. Oh, she'll be big up in Hokitika, surely. Hello, you have reached RSA, Hokka. She sounds like someone that works there.

I'd say, Karen, that's got to be a Karen. Westland RSA at email. Evon. I'd love to know now Emails are all lowercase Evon's a good shout

All lowercase Yeah, all lowercase That's so fun That would be a fun game They've just got email in Hawketichita Here somebody's voice And we all guess what we think their name is And then we have the closest wins

Okay well let's try one more bar And let's see if we get it in Yvonne I'll try this one This is the stumper bar in Hawker Ticker Yeah she sounded like a Yvonne or maybe it were a Judy Judy Judith Hopefully Stumpers open

Jude, my auntie's name's Judith I like that name Jude Kirt, outdoors are Jude No, that was Jeff Welcome to Stumpers Leslie speaking Stump, Leslie, is it? Leslie, it's Clint, Megan, Dan and Ash here

from The Edge, how are you, Dale? Good, how are you? Oh good, we're just talking about Horker Ticker this morning and how what a beautiful place it is and how so many people are moving to your beautiful part of the country It's good aye Doesn't rain much Is that what you think it is

Do you know what the magical Elemente is of your town That's drawing people from all over Altero? I don't know Maybe the friendliness Yeah The good bars like stumpers It's rumoured to have great work-life balance

Would that be true for you? Yep, yep Well you're at work at 9.50am so Yeah Hey but she finishes at midday Also, if you're rocking a bar, who's drinking at 9.50? Maybe that's why people are moving there? Yeah.

Maybe. Yeah. What drink are people ordering? What's the main kind of drink of choice? What do you got on tap? Oh, I don't know. I'm not actually out in the bar. I'm in the office.

Oh, she's the big dog. She's a boss lady. Come on. How long have you lived in Horkataka and have you lived anywhere else? Is it better? No, I've lived in Hokeetka, my whole life. Oh, never left. Where's the furtherest of field you've been from what?

hook a ticker? I've been all around Europe. Oh, yeah. So she's seen other places. And you're still like, nah, nothing like home. No, love it here. Good on you. Yeah, well, I've heard that this is what everyone's saying.

Everybody's saying, it's beautiful there, love the place. Do you want people to stop coming, or are you happy for more people to start immigrating into your town? Are you like, if off, we're full? Yeah. Well, yeah, I don't know. It's a hard one. If I was you, I'd be like, piss off.

You were born here, you don't live here. You're just kidding. No, I would say that. Oh, okay. Oh, thank you, Darle. Just wanted to get a little insight. Yeah. One of the specials today at the bar, you probably don't know.

No, I don't know, no. White bait, maybe? White bait, love that. Oh, I've got a white bait and like a spate's on tap, probably. Oh, Jesus. Yeah. Now I want to go. Yeah, well, good on you.

You have a fantastic rest of your day. You too. Bye, darling. Bye-bye. See you. Bye. She's lovely, isn't she? Yeah.

Sounds is hot. Oh, Clint, there's always, he's always a... The old teacher from today sounded hot. He definitely sounded hot. Well, she sounded cute. Cute's different. He had they're all like, mm-hmm.

I'd love to see if you guys can actually put your money with your mouths and we get a whole load of people in. I like it as an idea, yeah. They're like blacked out and then we have to guess we have to choose someone on their hotness just from their voice. Yeah, they could just all be standing behind a black curtain and it's like the voice. And we go, okay, number one stands up.

And then they all say the same thing. maybe there's like four of them and then you eliminate like no number four ugly voice no thanks and then you get to see them you're like oh fuck he's actually not bad whatever and we can whittle it all the way down until you go right based on the voice alone you have chosen

Steve Steve comes out you get to go on a date with Steve unless you want to go no thanks to Steve I'm going to choose one of the other guys that I eliminated earlier and it's like a social experiment does a sexy voice actually an easy way to do that would just be like five guys talk

and you say that one's the hottest. Okay let's play this out. We don't have to like eliminate people. And we go draw it out because then we don't know. You could just be saying his voice is the hottest but actually it's because he's the hottest looking. So we have to get rid of his face. Make it blind but you don't have to do all these elimination rounds.

Just five guys talking to a microphone and you go that guy's the hottest. And then you take the blind. But then he comes out and then you go, oh fucky. And then you see the rest of them and you look at him. Actually, he's the hottest. I was wrong. Let's play it out. Yeah, okay. So I'm behind the curtain, Clint.

You can ask me any question. Off you go. Why did your last relationship not work out? Okay, thank you. And it's too much to drink one. Right, that sounds terrible. Bachelor number two, Carl. No, you have a question.

You can ask me a question. Go, yeah. Go, then if you want to second. What? It's still on my lap. Take you down to the beach and sit on my lap while we fuck. Oh, God. Have I ever played you the fresh prawns audio?

I have, haven't I? That's what that guy sounds like. What, do you want to ask me a question, honey? No, thank you. Good luck. Come over you. I think there was another thing as well that I was really intrigued by. You know, women supposedly can be attracted to,

a man's pheromones when like meeting for the first time and then there was something where you could literally get guys to bring in like a t-shirt that they've slept in for like three nights and then you like smell the t-shirt and work out which pheromone you like the most and then work out and then find out who it belongs to do whatever slip them on

I need to just stop doing that voice is making me even like Carl I didn't even know he was inside to be honest I couldn't feel him as what she said We could actually play We could actually play

We could actually even play this We could actually Even play this Like tomorrow Or even now on the only fans Where if we just blacked out the glass So we couldn't see Then you could just get four random dudes

From the office And get them just to talk into your headsets And then Ash will go Number two, I think is the hottest Then we bring them in And she'd be like, yep, I was right Because I work with him and then I'm judging their physical appearances.

And afterwards, I'm going on, she doesn't think I'm attractive. You don't? No, it's mean. No, it's so mean. That's not mean. You're just big-uping the one you like the most. Don't do that. I don't want to do it. Or you just go, you get them to say the thing.

No, because then we need to see them. And if they listen to the podcast, that'll know. Do you want me to take part? I need you to stop doing because you also do a weird face when you do the voice. And it makes me uncomfortable. I don't like it. Do you like me, Cliff? Are you growing on me, for Monash?

I need, I'm just here for a friend. Yeah, yeah. I think you're actually misunderstood, mostly. Companionship and stuff. I've never, you know, no one loves me. I feel like your name. I feel like you're a Gary. Dennis.

I was going to say, or a Denis. Dennis. Dennis, are a Gary. Does anyone call him a kid Dennis in 2025? Not anymore, no. Yeah, and a cousin called Dennis. We forgot to play West Life's new song. What is it?

They put a new single out. It won't be in the system. It's called Charriot. We got a little world of our own. We got a... That one? Yeah, that's an old one. This is a new one.

Because they're doing a reunion to an island and they sold out like five shows in a row. Whist Life... What's the call? Charriot. Mm-hmm. Oh, yep. Mm-hmm.

I'm about to play too. Oh, one of our mics was on in program. Someone's saying, can hear other people talking. Oh, God. Program. Oh, there it is. Carl. That's awkward.

My voice was going out on the radio. I said I was going to find a couple of hotties and an absolute monster. Oh, my God. And what I said, well, you take me out of a date. I'm just glad it wasn't my guy, to be honest. Imagine him, this is always going out on the radio. I'll tell you what my stomach saying. for a minute there.

Did I say, I didn't say, fuck, did I? No, Jesus. Someone's getting fired today and it's not me. It's not Dennis. Dennis is safe. That is so, I feel sick. You know why? Neeps, go back on the air checker and see if we're getting on.

They've been texting for five minutes. Oh, shit. You know why, because when I turn the desk over to record, if your little fader is just up past the zero, it won't change it across. It's my little fader. You don't have a little fader. have a little fader, leave me alone, bro. You do give little fader energy.

You know, like, you know if you turn everything off and then you hit to record and everything changes the recording. But if one of the channels is just sitting up, it looks like it's on zero. He didn't say anything bad. Oh, shit, I happen not. Do you know one time? Are we still doing our only fans? Are we still doing our only fans?

One time I said this. Didn't realize my mic was on. An ad came on and won't say what the ad is, but I was like, oh here she goes again old chainsaw um Cheryl or what I don't know she had a name I can't remember the nickname I'd given her

and then I and then me goes what do you mean I go oh her voice is grating like a chainsaw I was just like wham wham so I was literally talking about an advertiser over the top of the ad doing a chainsaw voice and my mic was going to love to wear and the briskos lady never came in again that was done here

my favourite was when I was working over George FM like beginning of last year and we just switched over to this new radio program that we're using now Zeta and generally we're still trying to figure out how to use it and stuff and he was recording a promo and he like recorded a bit

and then he cocked it up and they went oh you fucking can't and then didn't edit it properly yeah we still not on and then that's what ended up playing on air in the middle of a song that was amazing wow I had to do that on Christian radio

as well where he swore or whatever and then just by chance because of fuck and then someone came in and started chatting to him, got chatty, chatty, chatty, five, ten minutes that he left, looked down and had seen that he had ended the recording, going, oh yeah, I've done that one, and then just scrolled on down to the next one and forgot what he, that he, he should have gone back and listened to it, but I guess because he saved it to do it again. What about, do you remember that there was that one on News Talk ZB a couple of years ago,

Rachel Smalley, do you remember this one? She said heifer. Yeah, so they were doing a segment on like, on weight loss and stuff like that, and she was saying, oh, the average weight of, you know, New Zealand woman, blah, blah, blah, is this many KGs. They then went punched to an ad break and she left her mic on by mistake and she went, 60 KGs, absolute heifers.

It was so... But that's the shit we say, but I would all get cancelled. If the things we say to our mates, we're then broadcast in that context. A lot of the stuff you say, you don't truly mean. You're just saying outrageous stuff

to get a reaction out of your friends. There was the famous one from the Breeze when she was going into Spandale Ballet and the Spandale Ballet starts and she goes, and they're coming to the country this year on the breeze Spandau Ballet Oh fuck off

Oh there go We see she's something of malfunctioned in the studio And she'd left them like Oh fuck off for year She went from just beautiful breeze pursed to fuck off Okay I've got the audio of Carl going to ear We'll go find a couple hoddies And the heads were just adorable

We're like so excited, so epped up. And I was like, oh, how long did they? Yeah, she was talking on ear. It's over the top of her voice brain. That's so mean. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. No, we'll go find a couple hoddies in an absolute monster.

And the kids were just. Ha ha ha ha ha. Oh my God. It's funny because people were thinking talking about girls, which is like a bit sexy. And yes, it's just so, like, ignoring him. Oh, fucks, it's been great, guys. I'll see you later. Yeah.

We don't know how to it. Yeah. Oh, we didn't get to your, um, here it is. Uh, Ash is what that? This is a new. We's sky. I don't know how it go. I don't think that's it.

I don't think that's it. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. It's not flying without wings. No, it's not, is it? Well, I need to go a few weeks, can I go? Yeah. See you guys, love you all.

Bye. Oh yeah? I'll give it a bit of a jam. Yeah. I don't want to sound Charlie Puth as well. Anyway, I won't play too much. Oh, Lady, Westlife will come for us. And if a band is going to come for you, that'd be the band you'd want probably.

you'd want probably. I reckon Westlife. Now they'd be like, thanks for playing our music, guys. Yeah, yeah. I'm like, you're welcome. 25 years. It's been 25 years since Westlice started because they've got this ultimate collection. Yeah, and they've done a tour. They announced a gig in Ireland, in Dublin, it sold out.

They did four more, all sold out. They just kept putting the shows on. Keep putting the shows. Going, well, just keep going until it stopped selling out, and then we'll know what the virus is. And now they want more, and they're like, we can't be doing more than five. We're too old. Fair enough.

They're like, probably 40s, 50 now. All right, love you guys. See you, see you, 10. Catch you tomorrow. Rover. Music, radio, podcasts.