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This is a podcast from Rover.
Come for the chat, stay for the trauma bonding.
This is Clint McGinn-Dand-Dan's Onlyfans.
Podcast, that is.
Hey, welcome to the OnlyFans.
Clint Meagand-Dan, Worth, Ash, London.
Good to have you all here again for another OnlyFans.
I've brought something in today.
I've had a little bit of a hobby.
You know how I've been trying to find a hobby for the last few months?
And I'm still into my remote control cars.
I've done watch collecting.
I've done record collecting.
My latest one, though, Clint.
Well, just on the remote control car, sorry.
When's the race that you've...
So I've entered a man...
So a man came to me...
Well, I got in touch with a man, okay?
Who runs a remote control car club in Auckland.
He's cool.
And I've entered my first race.
Does he have like an indoor track?
So he uses a school, a primary school.
Oh, God.
That sounds dodgy.
He has not got a permit for this.
I just use a local primary school.
When he puts cones out or something.
Pretty much, yeah.
So schools are great for this sort of thing
because they've got big areas where they can put their cones out.
And so I think that every month they take over this primary school.
I wish it was a college, but it's a primary school.
So it makes it sound bad.
Yeah.
And then a whole load of growing men, I'm hoping, turn up and race their cars there.
I just want to say, I'm just closing my eyes.
I'm imagining either my husband, Adrian, or even you, Clint, coming to me seriously
and being like, yeah, I've seen.
signed up to do a race with my remote control cars at a primary school.
And it's so absurd when I imagine it coming from you.
No, but Dan is just saying, hey, sorry, I'm busy, I can't hang Saturday.
I've got a car race.
Yeah.
And you go, oh, shit.
And then as you dig deeper, then you realise he gets more and more virginy.
Yeah.
There's nothing virginy about it.
I think it will because most of the kids there will be 11 and under.
Well, that's when I called the guy because I did the online thing where, so he didn't know who I was.
Filled out the form online.
Then he called me back and he was like, and so you're bringing your son.
thinking that it was like me teaching my son how to drive remote control cars.
And I was like, no, it's just me.
And he was like, okay, well, good.
All right, little buddy.
Yeah, so I don't know if I'm going to turn up
and it's going to be a whole load of dads and their kids.
No, no, no, I just hope it's you and children.
Dan says there aren't many kids that can afford a $1,500 car.
Yeah.
But there are some kids with really rich parents that...
True.
No one's buying their kid a 50, like they're going to farmers
and getting a remote control car from there.
But not if they're racing them.
Yeah, how much is entry?
I think it's $9.
of like children
So I've entered two races
So I've entered two races so it was $18.
And do you, is it a time trial
Or do you race against the other cars?
No, it's all on the same tracks
So you can like hit them off the course and stuff
It's not just a demolition derby
No, there's no
Children need rules
I think contact is it's not allowed to forcefully push someone off the track
So you have to stay away from me
I'd like to go and watch just to see if it's
What I envisage
Like expectation versus reality
see if it lines up.
Absolutely no chance
either of you are coming
because I know you would stand there
and go,
a loser.
Hey, hey, hey, take that back.
You would?
We would never call you a loser.
Only if you lost a children
would I call you a loser.
Then we'd be like lose
because you then are a loser.
You technically did lose.
Yeah, you're like, virgin and they're all
virgins.
Okay?
Bloody hell.
And then one of them would be like,
no, that guy's probably not.
They point at you.
You're like, well,
hey, my wife's come to watch.
So yeah, look, and that's,
so I've got a new one now as well.
I've just started.
Another one.
I got this for my son
so it's a marble track
and you can get them online
I think they sell them at farmers as well
and I know it's starting to look like
I'm at, fuck now I do realize what I look like
Don't cry, Baba
Yeah it's all right
You're going to cry
Oh my god
Are you crying?
No I got this for my son
Yeah
I'm not crying
So it's a marble track where you can race
Can we get a tissue for Dan
Here look this is going to turn you guys around
If I go over there
Turn that mic on there
what colour do you want ash blue red yellow or green oh i don't care
yellow i'll take green
oh god he's dropping them on the ground the marvell
clumont's green dash your yellow
yellow please and i'll be orange
okay here we go
who's in the lead
green in the lead green is home is late that's me i'm green
no i get got to last place yellow's taking the lead orange is the second green
They're going down.
I know you can't hear me.
Yellow, I'm way in the lead.
Yellow is way in the lead.
But now green is taking the lead.
Me again.
The green is away.
Green is away.
It's fair and 10 seconds away.
From the end of the race.
Yellow takes the lead.
Yellow, green, orange, yellow takes it out.
I'm glad I won that.
Now, see, you guys were offered at the start.
But man, oh man.
Well, it's just,
why is they puffed out?
Your ashes, blood pressure, it seems like, it's the same.
Meanwhile, you, you're blood pressure is through the roof.
My goodness me.
Now, that is racing.
I haven't watched a Formula One race that exciting in a long time.
The lead changed three times, thrice.
The lead changed.
I did like the lead changing because they go into the funnel thing and they go around.
The problem is every time the lead changes, it's the same funnel thing.
So it's like watching the same track over and over.
That's not for me.
I think it needs other ways in which the marbles can change the lead outside of just going round and round.
Here was my idea, and I know that you might poo-poo it, but I think you let it happen, okay?
Each day we give away one marble, okay?
So the best caller, the best person we have on the show or something.
So it's a lucky marble.
By the end of the week on Friday, we've got five marbles gifted to a listener, each listener.
then we do a marble race on a Friday online
that maybe someone else can enter online
Well gambling, okay, I'm in
And then the winner of that marble race for that week wins a prize
But what, no, I need to know what it is.
Money, cash
Oh yeah, okay, I'm back at all.
I'm thinking $500 each week.
Whoa!
Where are we going to that sort of coin from?
Marketing.
No.
Marketing budget.
Do me and Clint have to act interested or could we just be like?
You can do whatever you want, but if you don't act interested, Ash,
I will get you fired.
How do you think that's going to go?
What are you going to do?
So you're going to go to Ash's husband, as the boss, and tell him what?
I'll say she touched my dick.
And he can't say no.
He can't go, Dan.
That's a lie.
And I'll be like, is it?
Do you want to see how far I can take this?
I'll lawyer up.
I'll go to HR.
Yeah.
Lawyer, even higher.
Yeah.
No, I'll find a way.
And then they'll have to come to me that and I say, I'm so sorry, Dad.
I'm going to have to fight because you've touched down sick.
And I've got no proof you didn't.
Anyway, no, I won't get that far
Because we'll play it a couple of times
And you will be swept up in the fun
You'll be swept up
Is that as big as the track goes?
I can make it bigger
Can you?
And the track.
Okay, good
I think the longer the track goes for
And the more moments there are
Where the lead can change
The more exciting that race becomes
See, now Clint's involved
Now we need
I could not give less of a shit
About your marble race
But I love you as a person
Wow
And I respect you.
Have you seen the races that they do on the treadmill and they have the cars
and they turn the treadmill on and the car's actually race
and every now and then they're banged each other and then they get flipped off the treadmill?
Yeah, that was cool.
Kind of like that kind of vibe.
Okay, well, we'll buy a treadmill.
Leave it with me.
Okay.
Leave it with me.
Thanks, but.
We'll give that marble track the ass and we'll get a treadmill and some...
Or do you combine the two so you have the car and when you're
car gets spat off your marble
goes down the track
now we're talking
it's almost like a relay
my tummy hurts a little bit
and all I want to do
all I can think about now
is how relieved I'd be
if like you
I farted and burp
at the same time
I did that last night
I was almost at the point of vomiting
I felt so sick
and then I got out of how to bed
to go into the toilet and vomit
and on the way to the toilet
I went
and burp at the same time
simultaneously
and I fucking almost orgasm
it was honestly
the best feeling I've ever had in my life.
I don't think any person in the world is either
burped, farted and orgasm at the same time.
No, but I could burp and fart at the same
time. No, but it wouldn't be
relieving. Oh God, there's guests to fart this
week. Because you had the pain beforehand.
Remember you guys made me do the jump
where you had to like fart and then you jump
and then fart airborne and then land.
Can we try that this Friday?
We might up Clint's mouth and his ass
and see if we can burp and fart at the same time.
I don't think it's possible.
You know how I had that bean salad for breakfast
yesterday. Because I always have a bean salad
at once a day, but there was something about
the red, excuse me, kidney beans,
the farting I was
doing yesterday. My butthole was
like hot, there were hot farts.
Oh, they're the worst ones like, and they sneak
out like this. Yes.
Yeah, for like five seconds.
You guys are fat. And you're like, oh, that's hot.
And then it's when you're like, get out of the room.
Yes. Get out of the road. Everybody.
I was like, you guys need to go.
Why? How do we get from
like, highbrow Marvel chat to your
gassy hot farts.
You brought it up saying you farted and
shoot you up at the same time.
He brought up first and then you laid the foundation.
I can do it now because you just, if you can burp on cute
and then you just fart on cute.
But what he's talking about is the relief of the feeling sick
and then all that gas leaving his upper and lower.
Not just being able to be able to do, like have it, go both ears.
I felt honestly like I could float away.
Could slay a dragon.
Honestly, it was amazing.
I felt like a ballerina.
Like so light on my toes
You know how they say
A sneeze is an eighth of an orgasm
I reckon farting and burping at the same time as half an orgasm
Yeah, so it's almost as good
Yeah but also like sometimes
I would say that sometimes the feeling of a really good
Relieving fart or burp is
As good as an orgasm
Yeah
Because it's all about the relief
And the euphoria
As opposed to like
Sometimes a fight can be euphoric
Yeah
Oh well Clint
You're going to do a burp and a fart at the same time
I can do
Try
Go on
Take us out
Where's the mic going to go
Mouth or Anus
Yeah
Yeah
Yeah
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