The Edge Breakfast - ONLYFANS Poo on my face and put me in the bin

Episode Date: June 10, 2025

This is a podcast from Rover. Dumb chat, bad decisions, zero shame. If that sounds like your vibe, you're in the right place. This is Clint Megan Dan's OnlyFans. Podcast, that is. I think your natural hair like that. Yeah. So beautiful.

Both killer hit girls, you know what I mean? Maybe you're the nice girls. Mine are like... That's much nicer. That's manageable. Stop it. That's honest. You're prettier. I know you're prettier.

I know you're prettier. I like your hair. You have just witnessed honest real chat between two women. Welcome to the OnlyFans everybody. Hello. You know I just say we're not saying anything about yours Clint. We've got our lovely Ash in. Ash London who's going to be covering my return to leave in a couple of weeks time. Get on come sooner now.

Every time I see you I just feel for you. Thank you. Because I remember. Yeah. It's so much. Oh wait. Sorry how many weeks did you work up to? I, every time I see you, I just feel for you. Thank you. Because I remember.

Yeah. It's so much. Oh wait, how, sorry, how many weeks did you work up to? I worked until 35, but then had Buddy so early that I had him like four days later. Oh, fuck, really? Yeah. Oh, fuck. But again, I wasn't working, working.

I was in COVID, just sitting around. Where are you me? What are you up to? I'm 33. Okay. So, okay. So, fuck it. So, you'll be What are you up to? I'm 33. Okay. So you'll be the same. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I finished at 36. I finished up at 36. But that's the issue. That's what I'm worried about, Ash. The last time I had Daisy at 37, but I also finished at 37, so I had her four days later. So when do you want to go to Swagansack Manifesting, Ash? What's the week that you're like? I'd like to get to 30.

But that's the thing. I would actually like to be earlier because I'm struggling of course but then the earlier I go then the least time I have between work and time off so I don't even know what I want I don't know if you girls probably have discussed this what happens if you go I just can't do next week I'm done I'm gonna I'm calling it early we're two mothers who work as if we haven't had a discussion about this yeah Ash has already been like if you need me I'm here. Oh, so you could start Monday if you need to.

You could call me at 4am on Monday and be like, I can't do it, I can't get out of bed. I'll be like, babe, I got you, I'm there. Oh my god. I know, what a woman. Wow, you've got a lot on. You've got your own kid. Yeah, nice vibe.

Go see Kindy full time now. Oh yeah. Fuckin' loves Kindy. Oh, he loves it. Good, good. Oh, thank god. But we've got to this habit now with drop offs. There's a waving window, which is like where they can go and stand at the window door wave. And it used to just be a wave. And then about three weeks ago, I said, I'm going to do a dance for you. Thinking

one dance. It's got to the point now we're like 20 kids now crowd around the waving window for his theme. His buddy's weird mom. Right. And then yesterday was Moana. So I did a Moana dance. Today was Moana, so today was Poo Poo, obviously. Thank you, Marlo. So I did a Poo Poo dance and then the teachers watched and then other parents are coming in and it's a full thing. It's like a whole production. She's repeating moves. You're a pussy! You're a buddy. Every night.

It's just stressing out when trying to do a new routine. She phoned it in today. Come on. It's like you and Daisy in the, you know, in trick or drawing you do. Yes, I'm still doing a picture every single night and every single night I'm like, fucking hell. And now she's at the point of like, I want to do requests. Oh, gosh.

No, babe. She asked these really, well last night was not too bad, she did a big T-Rex. I was like, thank god we can do a T-Rex. The Toy Story one. Toy Story? No, no, no, no, I didn't do Rex. No, she hasn't seen Toy Story. I think it's because I hate that movie because it's so sad.

Because it's so sad and so good. I can't, I've never watched past number one. Have you seen Finding Nemo? Yeah, just crying right now. We let Buddy watch it and he cried from happiness at the end. He's sitting there with tears in his eyes. I was like, oh, Papa, what's happening? He said, I'm so happy.

Why did Nemo find his Papa? I mean, Adrian just look at each other like, bleh. I know. Sometimes they do things and say things you like. How do we manage to create that? And then a minute like that, I'm going to do a poo on your face and put you in the bin. Yeah.

OK, that's way back. That's concerning. Yeah. That's concerning. Actually, I have this thing that I like to collect books from the fucking past. It's a weird habit to be honest. I love it. You go into shops and you just buy old books.

I buy it because I just think it's such a time capsule of what was happening in that era. And a lot of them are, this one is a favourite, his needs, her needs, building in a fair-proof marriage. A lot in this one about basically blaming the woman for not being hot enough. There's a whole chapter on losing weight. It's amazing. And it even says about the guy not having to do anything

because this person writes some woman likes sloppy looking overweight men. Oh, our poor mothers. That's a bit of fetish I guess. I know, it's the mothers right? And you're a published author Ash. So you could look at this book and kind of pull it apart really. I thought so. I've highlighted a few things that I thought I could bring up on the podcast together.

Thank you. I've highlighted a few things that I thought I could bring up on the podcast together. Thank you. Books by Boomers. You can get different takes from, you know, I've got two boys in here and these boys are very different. You guys are very, very different with your opinions. I agree with a couple of them. Um, okay, so this is... Careful, we don't know number Meg, two to one now.

I know. She's got support. It's two to two. And I think Meg and I actually count for two people each because we're so opinionated. Yeah, it is weird. It's a 50-50 split, but I do feel our number. Thoughts and feelings. This is specifically for you boys.

What do you think about to make sure that you're not getting cheated on as a woman, you must get a hairstyle he likes? My wife hasn't done that in like what have you been married like 17 years she knows I love pink hair she won't do it. I'm not picky about hairstyle. Really? So he says if she lets a hairdresser talk her into something that her husband doesn't like she's begun to work against herself and her marriage. A certain hair color manufacturer excuses the higher prices of his products by telling the woman you're worth it, L'Oreal. More to the point, your husband should be worth it. If he doesn't like your hairstyle or

color on you, abandon it." Ooh, no, that's an old opinion. Can I just say though, if Adrian said to me, your hair's ugly, he wouldn't say it like that. It would be like, oh, look, I prefer it the other way. I'm probably just going to be like, okay, babe, like, if I disagree with know, if I disagree with him, I'm not going to do it, but like, you want your husband to like your hair. Yeah, I guess so. Yeah, yeah. But it shouldn't be a deal breaker.

It shouldn't be now he can have an affair and it's okay. Yeah. I told you last month to change it and you didn't, so whose fault is it? It takes time to grab bags, for god's sake. Oh god, I nearly got bangs. Oh my god. I nearly got bangs last week. I voted for your bags. You look good with bags.

No, because my hair's too curly. But it's materialist, Dakota Johnson. Those curtain bangs. Well, she's nailing them. When you look back at photos of a hairstyle that you did used to have, you've only saved the best ones. It's true. That makes you want to go back.

It's actually really true. It's so true. It's so funny about the Dakota Johnson bangs. Last night my husband said I liked it when you had Dakota Johnson bangs. They would look really good on you, man. So I'm probably gonna have to go back and get bangs. Get bangs.

No, bangs definitely will work for you. I think, can I just say, if Hannah got a haircut, she was ugly and she loved it, my mantra is happy wife, happy life. And if she's loving it, Even if you're like total bulkhead, nothing about it. If she comes home and she's like, Dan I'm not sure, it frames my face terribly.

I go, yeah it does. But if she comes home and she's like, Oh my god, I'm so happy, I feel so confident about myself. I'm not gonna pull that. And that's what I'm putting out. I'm having sex when I feel like I look good. Who am I to say this? So, you know what?

What do you think? If Jamie came home with like a mullet, short tiny fringe and light head dyed it bleach blonde? Is it? Oh, it's not pink? No. It's a pink! He's got a real pink hair. What's the pink from?

Pink? Pink or like a lavender purple? Like a light pink? And then, I couldn't describe it specifically, and then he likes a woman that had cropped up that if she reaches up you'll see some under-blues. Just a bit of under-blues. And is it a tattoo? Sleeve tap. Yeah. Wow.

That's very specific about it. You'd be a good lesbian then, cause that's a kind of, that's like a hot, like femme, femme, lesbian look. Yeah, is it? The tat, the pink. It is. Those are some gay bars.

Imagine if I, imagine if my wife and I split, right? And we caught it quits. Yeah. And then I went back into the dating scene, I finally find her, she's a lesbian. With pink hair and under boot. I'm surprised actually. Oh my god.

We were all point and laugh at you. Yeah, I found her. There she is. And she's just like me, she loves women. Oh bugger. We have so much in common. Too much actually. Okay, I've got a question for the boys as well. There is a right answer and a wrong answer on this one.

This is from Any Woman Can, the book from the 1960s. Should a wife have intercourse even if she doesn't feel like it? Oh, that's a tricky one. Nah, let me think. Clint, you go first. Oh my god, now he's seriously thinking! It's a no! Yeah, obviously, that's why I was saying no. Yeah, that's it, it's a no.

Why would you... Okay, I was just gonna say, is it his birthday? Oh for fuck's sake, no. It's um, what is interesting about the answer here is it says, if a woman sincerely expects her husband to get sexual satisfaction from her exclusively, i.e. not having an affair, it seems that she has to deliver what she promised. As one husband put it, I don't know what my wife thinks I am. When I need sex and she won't give it to

me, what am I supposed to do? Go out behind the shed and masturbate? Like when I was 12? It's an option. Just go to the shower. You don't have to go behind the shed. Why did the woman shit? Your bloody neighbours are like all the time. Bloody like Cheryl's talking to David going, bloody dang, Webbie, he's out behind the shed again. Why me? I don't even have a shed.

Why, wouldn't the wife just sit there and go, no, just go to the shower? Exactly, like a normal person. Gary, what are you doing behind the shed? Nothing. Um, it goes on to say that basically, it's like having, if you decided to go to a supermarket or sign up to a gym and then you went and signed up to the gym and realised the gym

doesn't actually supply the gym gear anymore what are you going to do? You go to another gym. What an analogy. Yeah but you can still do push-ups and body weight stuff. Yes you can. In a gym that doesn't have a bench. I know. I know.

Behind the shed. Yeah. And also I think I spoke to you guys about this. I don't know if I did it on air or not, but the technique that women should use if her man is finishing too quickly. Oh, what is it? Not that I need to know that. Like, I was way too excited to get some more information there.

Is it P. Barnett, the boss? Whoa, whoa, she hasn't yet gone yet. On your marks. Get set. Why do you have a pen out? She can try a technique that has been used successfully in China for 3,000 years. She reaches down, cradles his testicles and gives them a yank.

Oh, like a bit of pain. Yeah. I feel like that would completely, like that would end the session. Just the scrotum, like just the sack. Or she grabbing the balls because oh what it says she grabs actual balls He really is. Man's testes. Man's testes. So that's the balls as well Yeah, it'd probably be like being yank kicked in the nuts But a more of a gentle sort of rise that you would I just feel like it would also mentally put you guys off right?

You'd be like, oh gosh, she's gotten tugged it again. All right. Yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah, you know not very good I imagine this one here hmm I'm just trying to read how long's too quick out of interest you know what I mean like like what would you guys consider to be like two minutes you give me a good four minutes I'm fine yeah if you can get me there, I'm happy with four. Four to five. Okay. Three, four. I'm, as long as I'm done, I don't care.

If you get me in 30 seconds, take 35. Big bang boom. Yeah, I completely agree. That's not a bad rule. I completely agree. If I'm there, I don't care. But then if you're finished, then you're just sort of there, aren't you? If you know what I mean?

Like if you're done, then I'm still bloody... Don't act like you need more time. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I've been on 30 minutes of media. Thanks for listening guys, we'll catch you next week. It ain't getting better than that.

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