The Edge Breakfast - ONLYFANS - TBH we took this too far

Episode Date: May 1, 2025

This is a podcast from Rover. This is the OnlyFans podcast with Clint, Meg and Dan. It's not meant to be as explicit as the actual OnlyFans, but most of the time it is. A fart that'll leave you with teary eyes. Guess the fart, what's that smell? A stinky mystery for us to unveil. Guess the fart.

Special edition. Oh, my God. I genuinely, out of body experience, we're doing this. And I know that there's people out there, and probably it's the majority of people that are wanting this to happen. But I do think there's also people that are like, this is disgusting. For those who have not listened to any podcast this week, and you're just like, oh, man, shit.

I might just jump on and catch the latest episode of OnlyFans. Over the last few days, we've been talking about an apparatus that our producer, Carl, had created. Have we got the audio? Whereabouts is it? Oh, Dan talking about the fact that when he smelled a fart, he said, I think it smells like sweet and sour pork. Yeah, that's right. Is that what I said?

And then we were like, oh, my God, I wonder if Dan has that talent. Granted, Dan, you did not say I have the ability to work out what someone's eating from their fart. And that's a key detail I think we need to remember is I never said that I'd be good at this. No? I never said I wanted to do this. But then we were like, wouldn't it be cool for you to find out

if you do or don't have the skill? So producer Carl, even though no one asked, went and made a gas mask, kind of like a fighter jet pilot mask. It's not cool. It's not that cool. It's not that doesn't look. You see photos of it,

but only on the podcast fan page. Other than that, it doesn't exist. Yeah. We've been told this does not exist outside of this podcast. Yeah. And Casey, the boss, has literally said to us,

and not in a joking way, because sometimes he says it just to be funny, and he's said in a serious way this cannot go on social media. It's disgusting. So I guess it's more like a gas mask that you'd see in some apocalyptic-type film that they would wear because they don't know if they can breathe in the air yet. Carl, who joins us now, is attached a pipe and then a fan in reverse to create a suction so whatever gets put at the end of the pipe will make its way to the mask.

Can I just tell you quickly just a really funny thing? So my mum was overlooking after my son the other day, and I got home and she's like, oh, are you doing that fart thing on Friday? Because she listens to the podcast. And I said to her yeah God I'm like not looking

forward to it thinking that she was going to side with me and go oh I just don't think you should do it and guess guess what she came back with

oh come on Julie come on she comes back she goes Carl's really talented isn't he oh that's nice thanks Julie

thank you so good like he really picks up the ball and runs with it. Every time there's something, he's made that. I saw he made that all himself. I'm like, yes, to fun my face. There's something special about that woman.

There's something really special about Julie. This has been one of my favourite projects, and I've made some weird shit for radio shows. I started feeling a bit sorry for you, Carl, this morning, because I was like... For Carl? No, keep going. Because I thought

once I've farted in this and Dan's eaten it or whatever he wants to do with it What if he wants to do whatever he wants to do with it? Then, all this time and everything on this mask, it's over. It's like a one use and done. What's Carl gonna do?

No, Carl can't sell this on the black market into a sexual thing. I probably could but I've got a wall in my workshop at my house, and it's just full of weird radio creations. I had to make, for the last show, I worked on a thing called the Tammy Fanny 3000, which fired 34 ping pong balls in about four seconds with an air compressor. And that was because, you know, Tammy was going to Bangkok,

and we had to train him to go to it. He had never been to a go to it. Anyway. He'd never been to a ping pong show. There's just weird things like that that I've made throughout my career for radio shows and so the Two Taster 5000 will just go on the shelf and I'll be very proud of it.

Carl one day is going to be one of those incredible granddads that their kids say, I'm going to bring my granddad to school day and he goes, and Carl goes, hi, one sprawl, here's my Two Taster 5000.

He brings it into schools. Yeah, you know that guy from Mythbusters that makes all this shit? You like him from Wish. That would be my job if I wasn't doing radio. Like the Pocket Rocket race. Remember when we did that? That's right. My mum won that.

The giant dildo racetrack. That was fucking awesome. It was the first time my mum was on here. She represented a listener, and we raced dildos down a racetrack. Was it her dildo? And mum's dildo won. She took it home with her. So the listener, she won the listener prize back, a listener and we raced dildos down a racetrack and they vibrated and mum's dildo won. So the listener, she won the listener prize back

and mum got to keep the dildo because she asked if she could. Popped up right now. Hashtag live post. Guys, Dan is about to eat Clint's fart from Bella the Web Girl. That's on the podcast fan page. Okay, okay. I know we're still spitballing

and chatting and stuff. I'm going to throw this out as a one-time deal. One-time. What do you mean? What? I'll wear the mask if Dan can produce a fart on cue. Because I have also felt a little bad for Dan that he's being landed in this, and I thought, you know what, would I wear the mask?

And I was like, I would, but could Dan actually produce a fart? And a big enough fart for it to be good enough for the toot taste, and not one of these little ones, oh, something came out. So what about this? So what do you choose, Dan? What about this as an idea?

I will put the mask on, Dan will have 60 seconds to drop his guts down the pipe into my face. If he can't, then the roles reverse. I take the mask off

and we strap it to Dan's face. Dan, how do you feel about it? Can I at least try and then if I can't, then I'll wear it. That's what we just, no, no, no.

Oh, no, you're just going to put it on now. No, not wear it. You're going to try and fart down the thing. If you can't in 60 seconds, then it swaps. Yeah, that's fine.

Okay. Do you remember what you had for dinner? Don't say it. You're going to try and fart down the thing. If you can't in 60 seconds, then it swaps. Yeah, that's fine. Okay. Do you remember what you had for dinner? Don't say it. Yeah. Do you remember? Because I have... And breakfast and stuff? Okay, cool.

All right. Okay. And I mean, I've obviously prepped for this. You know, I... Oh, my God. Now, this is a switch I didn't see coming. I shouldn't have given him 60. Do I give him 30?

No, 60 seconds is good. We've said that, and we'll stick to it. I... Okay, because I was just Playing to my strengths Being able to fart on cue But if you can fart on cue Well then

Oh well This is annoying Because I've G'd up my The guy that's the listener That's texting through today He was texting through Hating on me And so I was

Wanting him to come on And he could listen to me Get farted in my face Right But we To win him over Yeah I do like this For the fact that I'm just sitting here And he could listen to me get farted in my face. Right. To win him over. Yeah.

I do like this for the fact that I'm just sitting here. Brilliant. So Dan's going to try fart for 60 seconds. Okay, well, Dan, you don't have to. This has been a wonderfully generous offer by our club here. Oh, fuck off. Thank you, Megan. Stop trying to make him look like the fucking nice guy now. I will give it a go.

I just don't. I'm not good at farting on cue. I'm just not. I know that Web Girl Bella's farted on our show before. She's let one rip. Clint's done it. Meg and I have never. So.

Okay, well, I've got some music for me when I put the mask on. I think mine. You're going to have to really mic it up because I just do really quiet little squeaks. Okay. Okay.aks. Okay. Okay. So, are you coming around this side of the desk? I guess so. Okay.

I'll come and panel. Are you going to... Okay. Oh, fuck, this is so stupid. Leaps, you're going to have to help cleanse into the mouth. I'm almost more embarrassed doing the fart than I am sniffing it, if I'm honest. Oh, God. Well, make up your mind, mate.

Well, then, okay, which way? You don't have to do it. No, I'm doing the... I don't want to sniff. Okay. Okay, now, remembering, if you do get a fart in, then we just need to do the toot-taster once, and it's over. If you can't get a fart in, it must swap. Yes. Got it. Okay. Okay.

You're fine to hold the funnel by yourself, Dan. Yeah, the only problem is the pipe's not that long, so I can't get it right down to my... I'm being locked in, which does worry me, because I thought you could just pull this thing off really quickly as soon as you've eaten fart. Can I get a mic? Because all my focus is going to be going into farting.

I don't want to be also holding a mic. So can I... I'm not having that job. Producer Nipia, I'm sorry, darling, that's you. I'm not going down by the arse. Clint, you can... Sorry, this is all logistical, but I think... I've got... Clint's going to have to come around

closer to you. Yeah, I think he is. I'll go around to that mic. Is the fan on? The fan's on. I've got a one-minute suspense bed. When this bed runs out If Dan has not farted I'll be removing the mask And he must comply with his end of the bargain

Does it have to be an audible fart? Because I could do a big gassy one Well then if you can't This is the thing It all comes down to Dan's trust Because he could say he did it and we're like We didn't hear it, we didn't smell it Then what? I will 100% swear on my life to Dan's trust because he could say he did it and we're like we didn't hear it we didn't smell it then what

will you tell us on the street that I will tell you if I farted okay are we ready for the 60 second countdown

here we go Clint has the two taste of 5000 on so we're going to have to hold on it's alright it's alright it's just technical

difficulties everybody so in the background Clint has the mask on the fan is on. It is just getting reclipped on now. Dan has put the funnel with the tube attached to his bum. Once this mask is completely clipped on, we will be starting the 60-second countdown

for Dan to try and fart in redemption that he doesn't have to wear the two-taster 5,000. You're having an out-of-body experience, aren't you? You can see that. It's almost like it doesn't want to be on my face. Yeah, just hold that. No, no, no, yeah, just hold it there. Hold it there.

All right, Carla, are you going to start the countdown? Would you like me to? Okay, Carla's going to start the countdown. And Dan, in three... Do you want to turn my five on too, Carl, if you can with the camera? I'm about to turn my... Here we go.

Three, two, one, and your time starts now. Okay. Don't have that too loud, if you can. I'm about to turn my... Here we go. Three, two, one. And your time starts now. Don't have that too loud, because you won't hear my... Dan is focusing his... Hold on, I'm not. Now I'm not. Okay, just focus.

I will talk if you need to. Shh, shh, shh. Poor Napier is in a... Shush, shh, shh, shh. Fuck, I'm going to shit. Well, if that does happen, it will still work and we will count it. Okay. I can definitely smell a shit down here.

Three, two. It's not looking good, Weppy. Oh, fuck, I'm gonna shit. I'm feeling all faint. I'm feeling all faint. Do we have medics on standby? How long have I got? Medics on standby 25 seconds

25 seconds to fart Okay Yeah bring up Al's pants He's running out of time I'm gonna piss That is knockout 15 seconds I will accept a shit

I will not accept a piss Out of the four bodily functions There are two you don't want to Five Fuck Four Three Two One Out of the four bodily functions There are two you don't want to Five Fuck Four Three Two

One Daniel please Daniel please Genuinely got nothing Please put on the two taste of five thousand Oh fuck Wow Wow

Oh man Now Clint you also get 60 seconds I don't think we'll need it But that is just to be fair If you can't do it Because I've seen you get stage fright Do I get to fart for 60 seconds? Yes, exactly. If I do one and then I have another one

and then another one, I've got 60 seconds. 60 seconds to fart. And he has to keep it on until he gets it right or he gets to the end of the 60. Correct. Daniel, you may not take off the mask

until the 60 seconds is over or you guess correctly. Are we ready? Fair is fair. Zepir, are you guessed correctly. Are we ready? Fear is fear. Zepia, are you in the right position? Don't sit, Clint. Sorry. Okay.

Okay. I'm in position. Players ready? Yes. Jeez, I've had a fart and lost it about four times. Here we go. You all right? Playing?

And three, two, one. Begin the time. Daniel, any kisses? I'm not smelling anything yet. Oh, man. Get back on. I got another one. I just shot another one down there, but you guys were all laughing.

That's disgusting. No. You've got to guess, Dan. Pardon? Kebab. No, it was not a kebab. That is incorrect. It's not a kebab.

We've got 15 seconds left. 15 seconds. Come on, Clint. Go, Clint. Go, Clint. Falafel. Falafel. No, there's no falafel.

I'm sorry. Fine. Listen, listen, Clint. Falafel. Falafel. No, there's no falafel. I'm sorry. Fine. Listen, listen, listen. Here we go. Listen. I've got one more. I've got one more. Okay, it has been concluded.

That is fucking disgusting. Worst thing I've ever done. It's disgusting. I'm ashamed we've done it. Daniel, you get one final guess to see if we can prove that you can indeed guess the food from the toot. Please, your final guess. Oh god, that is the worst thing I've ever done. You know this, Dan.

It's hard, like it just smells like fart. Maybe garlic in there. There was garlic, there was a garlic component. Okay, um... I picked that up last night. And then I ate it this morning because it's not a morning food It was a garlic component But like there's onion

Yes yes Like there's quite a That's sort of the top notes I was getting But I must say I wasn't going That was the point of the toot taster Is it like a curry sort of thing? Oh Oh

Daniel Is it like a curry sort of thing? Oh, oh, oh. No. Daniel, Daniel. What is your final guess of what Clint had for the Toot Taster 5000, please? The final guess. Do you have a drumroll? Yeah, yeah, I'll get a drumroll for you. What do you think Clint ate for breakfast this morning after the Toot Taster 5000? A butter chicken. after the two teams to 5,000? About a chicken? Yeah! Yeah!

He's got the mask back on! He's got the mask back on! He's got the mask back on! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! I've done my challenge Next week Meg farts into it Thank you guys For entertaining our maturity Have a bloody great weekend

If you listen to this live on Friday And we'll catch you next week. Is there anything you can't do? Yeah, we seriously don't need to repeat. We'll catch you next week.