The Edge Breakfast - ONLYFANS - The smelliest of dedications...

Episode Date: March 20, 2025

This is a podcast from Rover. Come for the chat, stay for the trauma bonding. This is Clint Meggin Dan's OnlyFans. Podcast, that is. Hey everybody, welcome along to the OnlyFans podcast. Yaz is with us, she filled in for Meg this morning. And most of this podcast is actually going to feature an international comedian who has six Netflix comedy specials, Liza Slassinger.

Yeah, but before we get into that, Clint, obviously it is a Friday. Oh, so we're going to do that before the – well, normally it's the end of the pod. We're going to do it at the end. We'll do it at the end. Okay, that feels better. Do you think? She talks about the fact that if a guy compliments you – so let's say Dan and I, we don't know you, but we're at a bar and we're hanging out,

and we're like, oh my god, you're so amazing. Or me being like, oh my god, this Yaz girl is so incredible. She's this, she's that, she's whatever. Do you think I want to get with you or not? Yeah. Really? Yeah. Eliza

thinks the more you talk up a woman and say how incredible it is, the less you want to sleep with her. Really? Wait, so hang on. Is this person talking you up to your face or to someone else? Well, I guess she didn't get into me. So I come up to you and you're like,

we've been talking for maybe a little bit, and then I'm like, oh, you're such an amazing girl, yes? Yeah, no, definitely. What the heck? What's she on about? Maybe it's the way in which she's going to dress it up because she talks to us about some of the ideas that you get. Like in radio, we're just hanging out with your mates

and she's like, I'm working on an idea at the moment that I don't think guys, when they go, oh, you're so lovely and you're so thoughtful and blah, blah. It's like they don't want to sleep with you. They want to sleep with the other girl that they're being more mysterious with, that they're kind of treating a little bit mean and giving weird, like weird like quick cute little looks

i think this could also be like the difference in american and kiwi flirting because to be honest kiwi boys are so shit yeah that is kind of just like you're so lovely and nice so when are we gonna have sex it's like what the hell here's where you'd know if when i was in the dating game if i liked you and i wanted to you you know, maybe ask you out on a date. It's because I'm completely over the other side of the room and too scared to do anything. That's when I like her. Yeah.

I'm just like standing there like... Well, that's to her point then. I'm too nervous. So if you're talking to the chick and saying how lovely she is, then you're not intimidated by her because you don't want to sleep with her. Oh, possibly. So maybe you're leaning into her theory. Jesus, okay, if I'm talking to you, you're fucking ugly.

Oh, I'm joking. Awesome, I feel great about myself. How do you feel, Clint? Shoking. Bad crap. Obviously, I'm joking. Okay, do you want to guess the fart now, and then the interview that's already being done

we'll just tag on the end? Or do we go through the interview because it seems weird playing a fart game off the back and talking with Eliza. Okay, just do the fart, Glenn. Just do the fart. It's like the jams. Okay, well, no, before we play, I need to play a little clip for you that I found on Instagram that actually talks about how good farting actually is for you.

Because I'm being shamed a lot lately. I'm sorry, you sound like my dad being like, I found this little clip on Instagram of how good farting is, doll. Also, there are different amounts of farts you should do each day that are healthy versus not healthy for you. Which category are you in? How many times do you fart in a day? Zero farts a day. That's actually not a good

thing. It could mean slow digestion or even a blockage. One to five times a day, your gut might be too quiet, which could mean you need more fiber, water, or movement. Six to ten farts a day is still on the low end, but as long as you feel fine, there's nothing to or movement. 6 to 10 farts a day is still on the low end, but as long as you feel fine, there's nothing to worry about. 10 to 20 farts a day, congratulations!

That's considered completely normal, and your digestion is working well. 21 to 30 farts, it's likely caused by high-fiber foods like beans, fizzy drinks, or dairy, but nothing too concerning. 31 to 50 times, your gut might be struggling struggling a little so pay attention to bloating or discomfort 51 to 70 farts a day that's a sign something's off could be food intolerances gut imbalances or even stress 70 farts a day that's a red flag it could mean serious digestive issues, and you might need to check with a doctor So 75 today you should Hear anything over the fart noises in that audio. That's all I was hearing. What is that? to check with a doctor. So 70 farts a day you should talk to your doctor. I couldn't hear anything

over the fart noises in that audio. That's all I was hearing. What is that? I genuinely think we're too fart heavy. I do. Oh, we don't have to play.

No, no, no, we'll play. Oh, look at you. We're too fart heavy. Oh, come on, come on. No, I do. I want to play. I'd feel robbed if we didn't and I know everyone

listening would as well. Producer Carl? I'm just talking to Eliza's publicist here, the one who I jacked up the Eliza interview with. And I was just saying, oh, yeah, what we're going to do is we're going to chuck it in today's OnlyFans podcast

and then we'll play it on there later on. She's like, great, I can send her the podcast. Oh, OK. We can't. She's kind of. We can't. We have to be two separate podcasts. Send her the edited version.

OK, no, what we're going to do. She's a comedian. She'll get it. We're going to finish. She's a comedian, she'll get it. We're going to finish this podcast, and then if you do want to hear the Eliza Chan, she was hilarious, it's going to be a separate podcast. No, we don't have that much tape. We don't have enough film or whatever to do that.

So you're going to have to put it all together in one thing. Okay, well. We're running out of hard drive space. Put it all in one podcast. Eliza's people need to know I wanted to separate these two clips. Okay, sorry, Eliza. You need to own who you are, Clint, and you're a farty guy, and Eliza needs to know, and her publicist does as well. Just know, Eliza, if you're listening to this,

that we've put you second best to a fart. Oh, no. Hey, Annalson. No. A fart that'll leave you with teary eyes. Guess the fart, what's that smell? A stinky mystery for us to unveil. Oh, guess the fart.

This one's for you, Eliza. We love you. Yeah, we love you. So stop that. Not enough to put you before this. Okay, guess the fart. Okay, here we go. I can't believe I'm shamed for a game that you guys seem to really be enjoying.

All right, my guess. My guess today, we've been preparing for a while. It's going to be wet. Okay, wasn't wet at all then. And I'm going to go just a little bit sort of pent up and a little bit tight. I'm going to go. Oh, that was a long one. Here he goes.

Third week in a row for me. See you guys later. Have a good weekend. Thanks, Eliza. Here's Eliza. I thought that I'd leave you with teary eyes. Guess the fart was that sound. A stinking mystery for us to unravel. Guess the fart.

All right, world-renowned comedian, six-time Netflix special, Eliza Slassinger. Welcome to the show. I'm pumped. You have six Netflix comedy specials on the platform at the moment. Do you know any other comedian that has that many specials on Netflix?

I don't, but my new Amazon special dropped literally last week. It's a week old, and it's called A Different Animal. And so I know a lot of people around the world get Amazon, and so I'm pumped to have people see that and to have them see that and then come out and see the tour that's a little bit different. Do you get nervous recording a special? Because I've done a very little bit of stand-up in my time. I want to get some advice from you.

I'm nowhere near. Let me hear about your stand-up. I wonder how long into the chat it would be before he'd make it about himself. Not about you. I'm actually asking her about how nervous she gets before doing recording a special. Because I'd imagine, because you're obviously in

front of the audience but then there's a camera and it could go to millions and millions of people uh it could and it does uh hopefully it does go to millions of people you know it's not about nervousness is this thing you know it does take a lot of crafting and polishing and you want to get it right because you want all the beautiful work you did on the road all over the world to come out in this special so stand-up is this ever-evolving live thing but when you make a special it's that one chance to capture it and then the kicker is it always is better a few months later so no matter when you tape it you're going to feel you could have done it better and that is this perpetual state of misery we put ourselves in as comics yeah do you have like a backup day where you go, alright, we're filming the special tonight,

but if it goes tits up, we're going to do tomorrow as well and we'll choose the best one of the two. No, not unless you have an extra like $300,000 USD. And so, you always film two, just in case like camera one craps out

or just in case a hair was out of place or they didn't get the coverage. You always do two even though i always use the bulk of one of the shows what's the key to a good stand-up joke because i'd imagine there's not one rule but what's your it's got to be funny got to be funny and if it's not then you're doing slam poetry and nobody likes you so then you're doing a one-minute show and you've got to take your shirt off. If it's not funny, I suppose it's not a joke. I think that's maybe what I live by. I think that's maybe where I've been going wrong.

Maybe that's where you missed it. Maybe you were too open, too vulnerable. Maybe you'd be more comfortable in front of a classroom or in front of Congress or something. Maybe it's more from the heart with you. How often are you out in your day-to-day life hanging out with your friends doing something then you go oh shit that's actually quite funny there's something in that i need to write that down in my notes memo or whatever it is that you use that you go i'm gonna wow it's uh it'll be us out to dinner and i try to be present without my

phone i'll be like to my husband i'll be like can i have your phone i have to text myself something yeah or i'll just be like, I got to write that down. So I usually write down like a word or two and then I'll talk about it on stage that night. And then I'll just do it. I don't know if you guys can see that I have an animal in my lap. We have the housekeepers here. She is barking. So I'm doing my best to like contain her, which is a full body workout and answer your questions. So what's the last thing that you, cause do the same in radio things will happen and then you go oh my god that's funny and our friends now will go that's not for the radio and i imagine you probably yeah that's not for

uh your next netflix special um but what's the last thing that you wrote down you thought there could be something in that yeah i have it right here. Actually. I wrote this down. I probably wrote this down yesterday. Oh, um, that anytime a man describes a woman as just an amazing person, it's the code for like, I do not want to have sex with her. Like anytime you're like overly complimentary,

you're just like, she's just such a good person. You're like, Oh, do we like having sex with good people? I don't think that's the barometer. Yeah. That's great. That's actually, yeah, that's really good sex with good people? I don't think that's the barometer. That's great.

That's actually, yeah, that's really good. We might steal that for our show next week. Do you have friends that are like, oh, my God, please don't talk about that? Because, like, obviously, like, artists, it happens a lot in the music industry. Like Taylor Swift, she writes about her previous relationships. Is there times where you've been witness to something within your friend group and they've gone, come on, this can't make it onto the next special.

No, no. Otherwise, you have no friends. It's not like, oh, my God, I have to talk about it. I'm an artist. You know, you don't want to weaponize your friends' experiences. But I'll take, like, little things or I'll give them a heads up. I'll be like, I'm going to make fun of this one thing. But I do it from a place of because we all say it.

The last thing you want to do is ostracize your own friends. Like, yeah, nobody eats a burger after 2 a.m. You're sloppy. Like, you don't want to make them feel bad. No, no. The goal is to keep your friends because they may be the only ones left after your fans leave you. And have you been to New Zealand before, Eliza? Not only have I been to your country, I lived there for a month when we did a travel show.

So I have seen your country, like lived there for a month when we did a travel show. So I have seen your country like more than most Kiwis. We're talking top to bottom, rustle to bluff, inclusive of Rotorua, Invercargill. I have been up in it. So ask me anything. Okay. So we always like in New Zealand, we like big celebrities like yourself to say good things about New Zealand. What are some of the things that you, when you were traveling New Zealand, that you didn't like?

I'd be really interested to know. There's been some stats lately. I don't know if we have that much time. Great. The way you guys eat and treat your bagels almost classifies as a hate crime. I don't know if you've never met a New Yorker. I don't know if they just did a bag New Yorker. I don't know if, like, they just did a bagel drop

and you're like, oh, what's these? But the stuff you put on them is, like, weirdly... We went to one bagel place, they put lemon curd, and I was like, this is what you kept from the British Empire? It was, like, the tea time condiment? You're a little too into halloumi. It is not the best cheese. And it's squeaky, and I don't trust a cheese that doesn't melt. I agree with you. What's halloumi it is not the best cheese yeah and it's squeaky and it's i don't trust the cheese

that doesn't melt all right folks agree with you what's what's halloumi here every cafe you go to you can get like a halloumi option instead of bacon who's choosing halloumi over bacon people that don't eat bacon and i can tell you as someone who likes bacon i'm done with the halloumi um but you got a lot of fresh seafood there i we, we went spearfishing for Kina. So we have, wow, that's great. Um, yeah, I, I had my favorite part where the people and how beautiful your country is and how much you guys try to protect it. But one thing I did notice about Kiwis, this is very weird. You guys all give your dogs like deeply serious people names, like in the States, our dogs

are named like fluffy and buttons and crackers. And you the States, our dogs are named like Fluffy and Buttons and Crackers. And you're like, this is my dog, Richard. Like this is Robert. Like the most, they all sound like barristers. Like they all like, this is Donald. It's like a poodle. You've got to use weird names. Well, that's interesting.

I'm glad you didn't mention the other two things that have been in the news recently that Wellington's the STI capital of New Zealand and more items are being removed from the human body from Aucklanders than any other part of New Zealand. That just came out just the other day. In fact, $1.7 million worth of taxpayer money was spent on getting things out of people's bottoms. And you can imagine where they went and how...

That's it? Yeah. Yeah. Not that much money. I live very close to hollywood that's not that much money uh wellington i did visit and it is a weird place and also like it gave me it wasn't willing is that was that where the college is and there's like a super like there's that one street is it cuba street am i making that up wellington yeah no you're right yeah you know you're seeing them well it had such college like i felt like i was at freshman orientation like the vibes were anarchy but we don't fully understand how government works like that was the vibe

of that street yeah there's a bucket fountain there and that bucket fountain has been man and that thing has been deformed it has been pulled apart i've seen many times wow wellington is an interesting place because they're like what if we because i believe that they designed it in england before they got to the island and so the whole wellington is like what if we had a beautiful place and we put an airport on top of it like what if the airport was the focal point of the whole city and no one could sleep yeah 100 it's one of the most dangerous airports in the world you're lucky to land there sometimes like i've been on planes with a

backyard like i don't know who designed that crazy are you taking your uh get ready tour to wellington when you come here in april where are you going to be hitting after what i said about them they won't have no we're just gonna it's mostly australia and then i was like we gotta go to new zealand so i'll pop over to auckland uh for that one show in april and um but i'm happy to come back the last time i was there i did a show in christ church and you guys were a lot of fun yeah we can't wait to see what can people expect from your show uh you can expect to laugh you can i mean what do you expect at a comedy show you can expect to have your face and abs hurt equally. And don't worry if you watch a different animal on Amazon,

it's different than what you're going to get at this show. Never had a customer complain and we're very excited to come back. Does it have a running theme through this tour and through the show? It's pretty physical. So maybe it's that. The theme as always is feeling good about the fact that you bought a ticket standing up for women but including men and uh i think i think this one's for the boys i think they really like this one it's gonna be good oh awesome hey eliza thank you so much for

your time i can't wait to start ripping through your netflix specials uh and lead up to you being here in april awesome i'll see you guys then thanks nice to meet you rover music radio podcasts