The Edge Breakfast - OVERTHINKERS starting a colony on mars...

Episode Date: March 19, 2026

We’re spiraling today, and honestly, it’s mostly Dan’s fault. He managed to offend everyone by admitting he’d actually be flattered to have a stalker, which went down about as well as you’d expect with Meg. We also try to figure out how to survive in a cage and why Clint thinks shoving books up his backside is a legitimate way to gain knowledge. Things get even more intense when we have to decide who’s in charge of our new society on Mars. Between "Executive Reproducers" and Dan's immediate plan to take his clothes off in the Martian atmosphere, it’s a miracle any of us are still talking to each other. You’re not ready for the "Butt Book Bandit." 00:45 – Eliminating Norway: We check in on our international listeners.02:50 – Obsessive Love vs. Hate: Dan’s controversial "flattered by a stalker" take.03:40 – Meg’s Stalker Story: Why Edge TV was the biggest hit in NZ prisons.06:20 – The Poop vs. Dishwasher Debate: Clint defends his bidet lifestyle.08:15 – Cage Logistics: Why horizontal bars are superior for activities.09:40 – The Knowledge Ring: Clint’s very "hands-on" approach to reading books.12:15 – The Mars Mission: Assigning roles for the end of the world.15:30 – President Bella: Testing our leader’s basic space knowledge.

This is a podcast from Rover. This is the Overtinkers podcast. Yota, your host, Clint, Meg and Dan. Welcome. The podcast where we overthink everything. Uh-huh. Including the intro, including the name. Oh, God, it's been so much.

Actually, you might have seen we've been making these into videos, but if you did see them, you didn't see me. Yeah, Meg's been overthinking how much she's in the videos. Well, I thought about it. And I was like, well, I'd be exactly the same if it was no Dan or no Clint. I'd still be like, guys, because the camera isn't cutting to Clint. Is there a reason? I've been slipping our web guy, Ricky, a little bit of something, something under the bottom of the table.

No, I've been saying a little bit of lesser me for once. He's been going to HR for weeks actually about that. My. You slipping him stuff under the table. Yeah, you've got to stop doing that. A couple of fingers. He doesn't like it. He doesn't like it.

He keeps moving away. I wondered why he was doing. He said, hey, mate, if you want to get out of the do box, cash. He wants cash. Oh, he wants here. Okay, that explains a lot, actually. Not a thumb and a pinky. Yes, let's give them a shocker.

Okay. The shucker, bro. Actually, very quickly, we'll get into the country. Eliminate it. If you haven't, first time listening to this podcast, we're eliminating countries that listen to us to an merch pack. Today is Norway. Quite a few in Norway boys.

Oh, the Norwegians have gone. Yeah, how many do you think that are listening to Norway? 16. Oh, higher. Yeah, I reckon it's in the 20s. I'd go 24. 60. Oh, wow.

In Norway, there's 60. It's a random, mate. Isn't that lovely? So many box. The Norwegians are list. I reckon there's a few bots in Norway But I'd love to speak to someone that's listening from Norway We've got someone from Canada

Messer Shrew going they're going to win it They're like, I can feel it Yeah, they're feeling confident with it Well, you're still in the running, so far Canada A bit of a quick fire today with the questions Okay Hit the jams, Clint Okay, we want normal, dramatic comedy or dubstep

I reckon go comedy today Ah, fun Today on the O overthinkers podcast We're overthinking Would you rather questions? I reckon we do these every now and then because would you rather questions you can do a few

at a time and get through like three or four during the podcast. Yeah fantastic I've got one quick one too Dan so go ahead. Okay. This isn't the one about your mum and your dad is that? Oh the one where you can move backwards a meter and you're no no no not that one. Well it's the one that one that's the one that's to watch or you have sex with your dad and your mum is to watch is that? Yeah I've heard that one before that one's the impossible question. No I thought it was like you have to have sex with your mum or your dad

and no one knows or that's right or you don't have sex with your mum and dad but Everyone thinks you did. I've heard the goat version of that. Yeah. The mum and dad are replaced by goat. Right. What's your first one? This is a less naughty one, but I think it's also...

We can have a bit of discussion on it. Would you rather have an obsessive insane person love you or an obsessive insane person hate you? Now, instantly... As a woman this is different. Yeah, it's fun for you. It's fun for me. Take it less about a creepy person

And more just about someone that maybe you've Oh, love, it's got to be love. Yeah, they've got to have some sort of, I guess, insane and satiable. You wouldn't be love bombed more than hate-bombed, right? Because your brain instantly goes to I'd rather than love you than hate you. But then I feel like the love person could turn into hate. No, but they can't. Because would you rather have to love you or they have to hate you?

They can't love and then hate you. I think it would just be annoying with all the little gifts and letters and stuff after a while you'd be like, okay, enough. But it's better than them leaving like a bloody knife on your doorstep. I had a little semi-stalker. Somebody that got out of jail that used to watch me on Edge TV.

By the way, they used to put Edge TV in the prisons, which I found out about when I was at a gym one time and I had these three guys come up to me and get a photo. And then they were like, we'll send it back to our mates inside. And I was like, what? And they were like, that's all they play in the prisons is Edge TV when we had it.

I can get. So yeah, I had a guy who used to make beanie's and he would send them to me and send me letters to the point that when then it got to a point, a bit of a scary point at some stage. And so he was a person that loved you. So how did that go for you? Yeah, not great. But I don't know if I'd love someone that hated me obsessively. Because the person that was hating you obsessively, I'd imagine is constantly trying to kill you.

Yeah. If they're obsessively hating on you. Well, this is bad. And also just like, I don't know, popping your tyres in the morning and all that inconvenient stuff. Can I just say this is a little bit controversial? Oh, here we go. I think I'd be flattered if I had a stalker. I'd go, oh, that is such a white man thing to say.

Is it? Yeah. Privileged white man. The most privileged thing I've ever heard. Why is it privileged? Because you think you'd quite like to have a stalker. You have no idea what it's like. Oh, I know, I don't.

I don't know what it's like. But from the outside looking in, I'd go, oh, my goodness. Someone's that obsessed of me that they're stalking me. See, that's why girls don't get the justice they deserve, because people are like, oh, it's just a bit somebody's likes you. It must be a compliment. No. I guess it's a power imbalance because there's a fear if there's a man stalking a woman.

Dan's just thinking of some hot girl who's following him around. Oh, God, no, no, I'm not thinking that at all. I'm thinking of some obsessed freak. What? Man or woman? I haven't really thought of sexual orientation or anything like that. But I just, I instantly go, fucking how I'm that cool that someone's that obsessed with me. They're printed out.

Down to be over it in 24 hours. Yeah. Unbelievable. But at least you could be like, I've got a stalker. No! Oh my God! It's unreal working with these men.

It's unreal. All right, next one. Okay. Would you rather never have to take a shit again or never have to unload and reload the dishwasher? That's my one. I mean, why I got a bidet? It's actually...

I quite like shit. What do you mean? Maybe this is another man and woman one That we just like There's something about it It's not every time But sometimes you know you when you go in there And you do a real satisfying one

And you're like, oh yeah That's how it man So you're like I'm never having to do the dishwasher Whereas I've never enjoyed eating the dishwasher Right I've never enjoyed that But even just the inconvenience of having a shit You don't think that'd be great to just never have to do it

But sometimes there's a bit of me time Clint loves it I know he loves it Because he's squirting his bum with his bidet Don't bring it up But I also The dishwasher how often he does doing that a week.

In terms of like time-saving, if you're going time-saving, you're not even doing a disres every day. Yeah, you are. You are, definitely. In my house, at least once a day. If your wife is, if you're not. We've got two distraars. There's two of them.

So we probably only have to, like, empty them half as often. The guy is honestly, we speak of privilege. Oh, you're the only ones to stalker, mate. I'm not talking about a colostomy bag, because I think that would also mean, like, you know, that would never shit. You just don't.

I feel yuck. I get my kids, I get my kids, I get my kids, the dishwasher now. I'd be all bloated and stuff. I'd feel yuck if I could. Like, I'd have to, I feel like it's a necessity in life. You have to do that.

Well, it is. You're right, Dan, but this is. Thank you. Did you think you knows how to play this game? No, I... Next one. Now, this is just a real quickie. If you had to live in a cage for the rest of your life.

Oh, God, here we go, another privileged man. Yeah, go on. Yeah, yeah, if you had to. Yep. Would you rather the bat. be horizontal or vertical? I don't want them to go... It seems like an easy one.

Top to bottom. I think the other way, Clint. Why are you thinking top to? I think horizontal. Because I can pick my little lives through. And it's like... And I agree with Meg. I think you'd be able to climb them as well.

You could climb them like a ladder and go up to the top of the cage for a little bit of a laugh. You could swing a little bit. Yeah, you could use the top as a monkey bars. You could climb up. I think you'd have more fun with the horizontal.

Why do they do them the other way? So you can't climb them? Exactly. Yeah. But knowing Clint had used them as a pole and he'd swing around them and stuff. Well, I'm just thinking when I'm standing there and putting my hands... When you're getting your mug shot and you're like, how do I make it look sexy?

Okay, I probably would like the rungs. I think I would like the rungs. And the top answer is on this page where I found some of these. The top answer is horizontal. I'd climb them like a ladder for fun. Yeah, which is one. Okay, next one. This is the Omerthinkers podcast.

I'm going to make one up on the spot then. Okay. Oh, I've got one Okay, thank God I've got heaps I've got heaps I wonder what Meg's brain Would have come up with them

Oh, that was scary This one's an interesting one Would you rather have A magic van That could teleport you anywhere you want At the time and the travel Where you want to go Or a magic ring

That when it touches a book You absorb all the knowledge inside So when you put it on your ownus no just a ring on your finger clint you don't fucking shove a book up your ass and then you're fucking instantly smart I mean if you want to do it that way you can it's like you're like absorbing the knowledge

everyone else has a ring on their finger Clint has to shove the book up his bum to get their knowledge okay it's kind of like people when they're like shining their butthole into the sun to charge themselves but you're just pushing books pages against it to absorb the knowledge Clint a textbook he just fucking goes okay guys you'd be banned from libraries so quick man

you'd be banned from library so quick. They'll be like there's that fucking guy who's putting his ass on everyone. It'd be a real two-player job as well. Like if you wanted to really absorb lots of knowledge. I'm like, babe, just get as many books as you can and I'm just going to lie here on my back. And you just like press, almost like when you're swiping them out, like at the library, you should have to run them along.

What would they call them in the newspapers? The but book bandit. Yeah. Like what would they? The book wiper. The book wipers would shut down. The libraries would shut down because I'd be nervous about finding the book, but book white. Panker. Carl said that in my ear just then.

I actually think I would do the ring. thing. I would do the book. You didn't shove books on your eyes. You guys are so pathetic. Honestly so pathetic. I would do the book thing because you could become so smart. The magic van. Yeah, whatever.

Who cares? You can go wherever you want. You could go wherever you want when you become rich from knowledge. Yeah. Like I become very wealthy from knowing everything there is about it. I always think about this.

I don't think it'll ever happen. But you know, like if you wanted to go to Africa, someone in Africa want to come to New Zealand. So they just set up portals. I don't think it will even happen. Holy fuck. You're too busy shoving books up to do it.

We can send words and shit through the sky in an email. We're just going to work out how to do it with people and DNA and shit. But you can't just go to Africa in the portal and pay for a ticket. Someone has to be willing to swap positions with you. There'd be plenty of people that would want to come to New Zealand. You'd be fine. It's about getting back, I think. That's the problem is like, yeah.

So you go on this website and you go, I want to go to. blah, blah, blah. And they go, oh, great. Jeff's there, and he wants to come to where you are. It's like a sci-fi version of the holiday. Yeah, and you have to, like, transport at the exact same time to the exact same place. Cameron Diaz and Jack Black have done this, but, you know? Have they? Well, no, not with portals, but just with Airbnb. Wow, do you know the other thing I always do is I'll see someone walking by,

and you think, let's say they just, someone comes over to his journey or something, and he goes, right, you get to swap bank accounts and financial, whatever your financial situation. situation is with this person, but you don't know anything about them except maybe you might have seen them get out of a nice car or they do a job and you know how you assume some people make a lot of money in their job but you don't know and I always go, I wonder if I was given the opportunity to swap with them and I did whether it would be a good or a bad decision. I think the people that say online like I made a one million dollar month like six figure month you can just as long as you follow my like course they're not earning anything.

And then you swap and you're like where the fuck is all the money? Yeah, no way, no way. I even saw that the other day on. Instagram where I was like, yeah, someone driving a $9,000 car with $200 grand in the bank. There's a someone with $150 in the bank and a $200,000 car on tick. So images can be deceiving. Let's end on this final one, which I think is going to have a lot of discussion between the five of us in the room, including the producers. We've got producer NEPA, producer car, not producer Dan, announcer Dan.

This is the Overthinkers podcast. And I want Bella involved in this. Oh, you want Bella as well. Yay. Okay. All five of them. of us are tasked to go to Mars

after a big catastrophic event on Earth to start a new life on Mars. Oh fuck me and Bella are the pregnant once again. Dan, we've done it. No, no, no, not necessarily. Dan wants to have sex with Bella.

No, not necessarily. He's like, and I want Bella in this. I mean, if it's a choice between Meg and Bella, I don't know who I'd choose. I don't know if I, but this is the thing. Right. It's up to us, the group of us, to decide, whose job is what.

Okay, so we're starting a whole new world. So not only do we have to reproduce Meg, because that's not the only thing. We're having to start a new society. We've got to start a new government. Shotgun, Reproducer. You can't assign. Producers is in this title.

Exactly. No, but this is the thing. You can't assign it yourself. It has to be a group vote. We have to all decide. And discuss who does what. Executive reproducer. Let's go through it.

Let's cover off first of all. Clint? Who's the president? President. Who's the leader of the thing? Bella. Yeah, I don't want that job. Really? I don't want to be in charge.

Yeah, Bella, I have 100% to this way. Do you think so? Yeah, absolutely. Bella's trying to work out. She's got the right microphone on. Sorry, I know about this. I know Bella comes across as smart, but some of the shit she does, I've gone, Jesus Christ. What's going on there?

I'm pretty smart. Okay, if not Bella, who? I'd do what she says. I would say, Carl, our producer. Oh, Jesus, really? I think that we can't trust him with the reproduction because he's the horniest one on the show and that's saying something, we've got Clint here.

Carl is president. I think he has to be president. He's good at organizing. We have Bella's vice then. Do you have ADHD? Yeah. So I'd be like, bro, have you done that shit that Jupiter was telling us we had to do?

Are they going to blow us to smithereens tomorrow? And Carl's like, fuck, fuck, yeah, that's right. I forgot about that. Because if I run out of meds on Mars and I'm in charge, we are fucked. Like, the race is fucked. We can't do it because remember when you guys want to KFC you wanted a tower burger and he got a big bucket of chicken.

Yeah, that was annoying. But that is... 50 pieces of chicken for three of us. We had like 40 pieces left. That's literally my life every day. Can I put myself for it? No. Oh, okay. Do you think you'd be precedent?

I think I'm a good leader. What would your first thing be that you would instill as a rule on... Where is it? Mars, we've all landed, all six of us, and we're like, all do, boss? take our clothes off Jesus Okay I'm taking back over I'm gonna say I'm then I'm gonna put myself

forward as the leader of Dan's Dan's taking his clothes off straight away He's dead Meg we're on Mars we don't even know if we can breathe the ear yet Dan's taking his clothes off I'm gonna be the leader I've Uber reached a hundred cheeseburgers from Earth No

Where's Dan gone it's just literally his clothes on the floor And he's like Like within a sikin he's dead Fucking out honestly naked, shriveled, tiny dick and we're like, wow, it's weird, it even looks smaller shrivel. It's the only thing that survived.

Yeah, your dick is the only thing survived. Everything else disappeared into the ethos. The vacuum of space couldn't crush it. Oh, okay, so, yeah, so who's the leader? We have to decide before we move on, quickly. Well, it was you, but you're dead. Okay, no, no, no, we'll let's just, that was just a hypothetical.

So we're going with Bella. We're voting Bella? Sure, Bella, sure. I don't know how that came back to me, but I reckon I'd be a good leader. Okay, so President. Bella. How much do you know about space? NASA?

Shit. Does nobody think I'd be a good leader? What number planet are we from the sun? Oh, uh, fourth. No, we're third rock in the sun. This is insulting. Okay, next role that we have to decide on. We're gonna save you for the repopulation stuff, Meg.

This is outrageous. Wait, I'm like... What are the six? five, what are the six roles? Can we listen to this? Can the leader repopulate? Oh my God. Asking for a friend. It's out of five people because I've killed myself. It's not a beehive, Flint. It's not a fucking beehive. She's not the queen bee. I take it off my suit. I'm fucking gone. I mean to do shrivel tetties? Yep. Thanks to Liz. Just sitting on top of her clothing. So she's a tiny shriveled gawk. I don't know. On Mars, everything that remains genitals, the rest of your body is.

Right. So I'm dead. so I'm going to write that down. Meg's dead. President is Bella. Bella, you're also repopulating because you're on the girl left. Sorry, girl. Just quickly, I can imagine as well we're on limited oxygen and we're having this conversation. This is before we leave, by the way.

Right, who's the chef, nepeer? Okay, yep, chef can be nepeer. Yeah, I'm happy to cook. I can put a meal together. Although we only have dirt, so it'll taste like shit. Dehydrated. Who is in charge? This is the next important role of law and order.

Who's taking control? Clint would go around in circles forever. Yeah, Clint loves it. rule. Yeah, no, but I think that, no, no, I think that Clint would be too indecisive. We need an indecisive, uh, decisive person. No, but the problem is... That is very good at going, this is what's happening. But the problem is, you wouldn't want that job because Clint would go, but what about this? What about this? It would drive you so crazy because he would question every rule, just give it, give him the drive. Can I just been in charge of drinks?

No. No, drinks aren't important. That's the president's job. I'm doing Clint on laws and laws, because he's going to go around and around until it's perfect. And that'll stop him from fucking as well, because he's going to be a nightmare when we say. I'm creating the laws, I can create as many as I want. Six, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday can pop. Is he the builder? Carl's the builder. Yeah, he's got his head.

And he'll keep away from Bella. He'll build and fix. No, Bella's the leader. So she doesn't do anything she doesn't want. Yeah, she's not. In fact, Bella is taken out of the equation. What's Dan then? Headfucker.

They just had the music off, Glenn. Honestly, I'm done with the show. What do you keep? All the thinkers. equation because she's the president. What I've got is being shriveled up tips. You'd be so lucky, you little shit. You'd be so lucky to fuck my little shriveled up tits.

I'll be to shed the roll. This is rogue. This needs a warning in the top team. Is this going to be a video? Oh, no. Rover, music, radio, podcasts.