The Edge Breakfast - OVERTHINKERS the orphan bus

Episode Date: June 24, 2026

We have officially spiraled. In this episode, Dan gets completely called out for a sneaky financial move against his own wife, while Clint considers completely cutting off his charity donations out of pure spite. Plus, we test our sanity with a chaotic impromptu speech generator that results in a massive argument about an imaginary "orphan bus." You are genuinely not ready for how fast this chat falls apart—hit play and join the madness!

This is a podcast from Rover. This is the Overthinkers podcast. Or at least Motet know they've got a new one of those old flip phones coming in. Internationalists. This is one know, Motet. Ministry of... No, museum of transport and technology. That's right. So me's old-ass phone could go in there. Because normally you go through as like Sega Master Systems and Game Boys.

It makes me sick that he's doing that. I've got a year's membership to Motet, the Museum of Technology and Transport, or whoever it is. I take my son there quite often because he likes looking at the cars. But there's a whole room there that's just dedicated to old phones. It's the most boring fucking room I've ever been in. You just go in there and there's just like an old phone. Because they worked and you

can play with them. Yeah, like if you can touch them but they're in these plinths behind glass. There's a like old PlayStation. How nice you got a husband that's just going, for no reason. That's incredible. Just going to go out and buy you a phone, you lucky girl. That's the thing we don't have the money. With my money.

To be fair it is. It is a little bit. but like he's a spender and he loves to spend and I'm the saver and I think my phone is fine and we don't need a new one but Meg here's the thing yeah use it every day you deserve something nice because you've been so bloody good at your job you have been a great mother to your children but I like my phone because it's got my photos and my kids on it and I know you can swap them over but then I don't want all the junk you know I've got so many junk photos this is such a boomer thing that's what my mom would say oh I don't want a new phone because I've got all my photos on this one yeah you can transfer them across do you know I was going to say

The last thing that What was the last thing I bought my wife And I was going to say I was going to claim something But I didn't actually buy it My wife came in with two dozen red roses And And everyone

Well people are at my house And my daughter included go Oh that's so nice Did you get Jamie flowers? Oh No And before I even got a chance to lie And say yes

It turns out My wife was working for a client Doing a hair and makeup And her husband bought her flowers and then they were checking out of the hotel to go home, she was like, oh, you may as well take these because they'll just die here in the hotel.

So my wife had flowers that another man gave his wife that she got secondhand. Made me look like a dog, and I'd done nothing. Wrong. I just sat at home. Yeah, well, to be fair, you've done nothing wrong, really. You've just tried to admit something that you didn't do. Yeah, but I didn't even get a chance to lie. I was already in the dog books just because I didn't buy them.

This actually reminds me of something that happened to me yesterday. Am I in the wrong here? So I got my wife first. birthday, it was last month, I got her a lovely bracelet that had a little G on it. So it was for George, like my son, and it was just a little G. So every time she thinks of George, it's got this little G. It's like a charm bracelet, essentially. And the charm broke on the thing, like a couple of weeks in. And I took it back. It was quite an expensive brace. It was like $120. And I took it back to the place that I purchased it from. And I said, hey, the G's

broken off. And they were like very nice. And they were kind of like, we can change it. Why don't you get the necklace version because it won't break as easily. And I said, that's fine. And they were like, it's $37 or something less. And so I went, fine. And took it home. And then Hannah said to me, oh, God, it's a necklace. It would have been more expensive because you would assume that because it's a bigger chain,

the necklace would be more expensive. And I said, oh, it's all good. So she was like, oh, you spent more, let me give you the money. And I said, no, leave it with me. It's fine. It's pathetic. So she's thinking that I've spent more and really I've got like $37

refunded to me. But she's not to know, it's a thought that counts. Yeah, it's fine. There's some G spot joke there somewhere but I can't find it. It's about my fucking two-year-old son. What, the G? The G, yes.

Do you think I've given it to her going, every time you see that G, you know your G spot I'm fucking thinking about? What if this? Sick man. Now, when you see it, you're going to think. Yes, I am. I resent you for even putting that into my brain.

He's going to see the G. I'll be like, oh, there's a G spot again. And I'm going to go, oh, God. Now, I saw somebody do this online somewhere, and I thought, oh, I could do that with Dan and Clint. There is a website called Random Topic Generator.net, and it's for people to get better at doing impromptu speeches and to build their confidence. And I thought, okay, well, I can spin the generator. and it will spin up a topic and then I will give you one minute

to be able to talk about that time confidently. Would you like that? Would you like that? Would you like that? A rap. A rap. And prompt you like freestyle rap and it was shockingly bad.

So this is like the speech version of that. Okay. Would you like to start Dan? No, I want Clint to start. Clint, you're going to be getting one minute. That's a long time. 30 seconds? Do you want 30 seconds?

Let's start with 30. 30 seconds. And your topic is time travel will never be possible. Go. Don't think. The timer should hit off as soon as... Well, it obviously isn't possible.

You're wrong there. It is possible. It's definitely not possible. And they talk about having different timelines that you're allowed to... This is not a speech. Give me a speech. Okay, the only way that future exists is within movies.

And the, what is it? The Avenger universe and in Back to the Future. And if we've learned nothing from Back to the Future, is that it's all horseshit. I think in 2000. I think in 2015 there were flying cars. Had it all wrong. It's a shitter speech ever.

Clint's not going bad. Got Martin Luther King and Barack Obama are sitting there going, fuck, this goes. And time. Right, so. There you go. And in conclusion, bullshit. I had a dream. Damn.

Okay. Hell. Okay, can you give me 30 seconds so I know, like a timer I want to keep going on? Your time starts as soon as I've done the topic. Okay. Vaccines should be optional. vaccines have been a thing that we've talked about a lot

over the last five years COVID made it clear that vaccines are very much a polariser for society looking back on the times of COVID I start to believe myself what? The vaccines

shouldn't be compulsory for everybody Oh I found one If I want to have a vaccine That should be my decision It should not be the decision of the government. And I believe that I should not be told

by some stupid labor leading private... Right. That was really giving... Allegedly. Most Americans cannot find America on a map because Americans don't have maps and so much and so forth.

And you know what? I'll just add one thing to it. I would get a vaccine, but it's the fucking stupid people that don't get the vaccines that ruin it for everyone. Yeah. Also, if we could do the time trip.

I think Elon Musk would have sorted it out by now. Would you like another one? Oh, and surprisingly, oh, we all have the vaccines. We're all still alive. We're all dead, are we? Yeah, it's a controversial one you gave Dan. Yeah, I did. Sorry, sorry.

I had to argue for it, though, didn't I? Yeah, yeah, you did. Yeah, even though you didn't want to and that's not what you believe. Okay. Clint? Yeah, I'm going to give you one. Oh, me one? Okay. Yeah, yeah.

You need protein from meat to be big and strong. Especially from sausages. Boom. Boom, and time so that's now. If you want to bodybuild, and that is something that is important to you, then protein and iron are things that you can find in animal meats. And animal meats is something you can eat to give you those things to be big and strong. And if you don't have those things, then you will be little,

life and Jesus again she gave it a best shot she gave it a best shot hard for you to argue that as a vegetarian for those that don't know okay

Clint are you going to give a time don't even need my website why the male form is easy on the eye he's easy for that he's like that's fine he loves a man Dan can go on for 30 minutes Not sad.

No, I couldn't. And that is why I'm giving it to you. Here we go. Here's Clint on why he is a pregnant to the male form. That's so funny, though, if you did that. If we were in charge of the debating topics and the kids just show up and then we just troll the shit out of them at the debating finals.

Oh, that would be funny. How do they come up with the... Oh, see, now he's trying to smoke screen so he doesn't have to do the... Topics. Because you could just troll schools if you don't like them and give them a real shitty thing. to argue. Like you get me, time travel. Of course it's not possible.

Someone would have worked it out by now. We've been to the fucking moon. What would you like me to do as the idea of the topic that's going to give me? It's like give a prompt. What's the prompt for the topic? Because that was uncommon opinions. Oh, okay. We'll give them Oh yeah, that's a goody. So what is it?

Give a conspiracy theory. No, what about the easiest thing to debate? And if you still can't do it, it's like it literally gave you... Okay, let's try that. Your topic, Clint Randall, since you don't want to do the male form. Weird that he doesn't want to do that. Homophobic.

Piss off. Some of my best friends are gay. Named dog. Cats are better pets than dogs. Cats are better pets than dogs. That's an unpopular opinion. He's lost it again. The best debate is don't get up and go, this is a shocking opinion.

I don't do it anyway. They don't do that. I haven't started, though. I'm just arguing with the judge backstage still. I'm saying can you not give me anything else? You're a nightmare. Okay, you're supposed to be an easy topic. Honest to God, cats are better than dogs?

They're easier pets, it's said. Oh, okay, yeah, yeah. Better as pets. Cats are by far an easier. No, Meek said it's not a speech. It's meant to be a speech. Is that why you're talking like you're in high school? Yes, because it's the whole thing.

It's about doing it prompts your speeches. Cats, okay, this is how you're doing it. Cats are better than dogs. Why, you may ask, I will give you more than one reason. I'll give you five the first. You can go away on holiday and let them be. They can fend for themselves. Number two, they don't need to be fed every day like a dog.

Number three, they do. They definitely do. If they're a house like domesticated cat, they should be fed every day. They're easier because you can put in a smaller door that goes in the glass for a cat than a dog. So there's better security because one time I actually fit through Meg's dog door to prove a point. That's true. The ruin your robbers could get in. And time.

M4. Fuck. Shocking. Honestly. English was a second language. Right, give me one more and I'll show how it's done. Here we are. Okay. The ideal vacation is to the beach. The Maldives, Corsica, Greece, any island in the world.

No, I'm not speaking another language. I'm telling you about holiday locations and why beaches are the best place for it. You can get a tan. You can swim in the ocean. You can meet friends, family put up in a umbrella. But I will tell you this. No one went to the beach and said I had a shit time.

I have. She wrote about it in the beach. I once had sex on a beach. Yuck! Is sand all in your foreskin? That's awful, gritty. Jesus, what? I would have had to been humping the actual sand to get sand in the foreskin.

Anyway. Quick question, is this the best way to get hold of a charity that won't get back to me? Stop my payments. Ooh, yes. I've been trying to get in touch with World Vision because they sent me a receipt, like a taxable donation receipt. So you can get a third of your giving's back. And they gave me a receipt for my yearly donation. So we can claim it on tax.

And then they gave me another receipt for like a one-off-two-hundred dollar donation that I made throughout the year. The problem is, IID is saying it doesn't look like these are two separate things, even though fuck IID. It has two different supporter ID numbers because somehow they probably have two emails for me. So I'm donating through two different emails, so I have two different supporter ID numbers. Is it because you only donated $200 in the whole year and they're like, it's the same number? No, they're not accepting the one-off donation, thinking that 200 is part of my yearly given. Right.

So I'm saying to Wordvision, can you show what my yearly donation? is separate to the one-off donations that I've done so I can claim all of them. Crickets, right? No, fuck, well, Christopher Luck is going to take my tax off me and then I'm just going to give the money away and give it back. So, World Vision is wanting to get in touch with me. And I'm emailing them.

Interesting. So I'm now at this petty point where I feel if I stop my donations, all of a sudden, World Vision might come running to me and wonder what's happened after 23 years of donating. Sad for Ja-ja, though. He's not sponsoring fucking Jarja binks in space. Ali Ali-Ali-Zuma.

That's right. Ali-A-Li-Jum-S-Mu's name. I think his friends just call him Ali. I imagine, because Ali-A-Li-Zuma is long. You should do what I do and not donate money. Just do actions. What are your actions that you've done for charity? I do have, like, Meg, you ask me this all the time.

And you never have an answer. No, I do have an answer. It's just there's so many things I do. Philanthropy is one of those things. You can't even say, do it. Yeah? Philanthropy. Philanthropy is a thing that you don't.

It's a way of life. It's not just an action you do every now and then. Like, so I actually don't, I give a little bit of money to companies. Whisper is one of them. I think I donate to some sick cats. And I also work with orphanages. We've spoken about it. So you're talking about it's acts, not money.

And then you give an example of giving money. And then you just. No, but I'm saying that most of the work I do is stuff that I, it's actions. You really skipped over the orphan work. I feel like there'd be a lot of actions there. What do you do specifically for them? Just work with them.

Just work with them. What do you mean work with them? Take them out. Will you take them? I don't know. Well, you must have recently gone. You went last week, didn't you? Rock climbing.

Golf? Oh, you both. Do you take them out to lunch? Yeah. I can. Yeah. Do you pay for lunch? Yes.

How many at the time? Just as many as you want. How many? I'm not going to get into details. How many orphans did you take lunch? I do not want to get into details. The most you've taken out. 15.

15 orphans is lunch. You must have to borrow like the orphan bus. There's no way. Can you drive a bus? I actually signed an NDNA. NDA. An NDNA. MDMA.

That's not what author should be given. Don't give orphans. I'm really concerned. What is it? NASA. NASA. Okay. I've signed an NDA saying I will not talk about.

Non-disclosure agreement. They, orphans deserve privacy too. And so I've just said, you know, and it's not just orphans. I gave to that organization that woman Sarah Page that came in here. Kindest collective. I've done a lot of work with them. When you take the kids out, do you have to get their permission slip? Who do you get it from?

That's what I'm wondering. I'm just trying to catch them out. From their caregivers. The orphanage. What's the caregiver's name? The Orphanage. Auckland Orphanage. And when it comes to...

Don't Google it because you'll be gutted. And, you know, I've used a name list there because I don't want their privacy to be ruined. So it's not called the Auckland orphan. When you're driving them in the bus to lunch, have you ever had a crash in the bus? No. How do you find a park?

And the bus parking. Bus parking at my local cafe. Oh, no one's tow an orphan bus. Put it that way, Meg. I can park down a fucking footpath. No one's going, oh, let's tow the orphan bus. So the side of the bus is the orphan bus? Yes.

Okay, hold on. I'm just having a look. The website. The website. Have I got the right website? Auckland orphanages. Catholic Dicisysus of Auckland. Can you show me the photo of the bus?

Yeah, I'm having a look. They don't have photos of the bus. Okay, I've clicked on it. It's literally just a name of orphanage admissions from 1930 all the way to... So some of these people, older people, that are orphans. A mixture of ages, but I'm not going to get into ages details. What's the oldest age? Pardon, 50?

No. You take a 50-year-old out for lunch? Hey. What happened to her parents? They're dead now from old age. I'm sorry, so what she's saying is old people can't be orphans.

That's just shame. Well, I know my mom's an orphan then. Exactly. So you took my mum out to lunch? Oh, we'd love to take her up for lunch. She's got her own bus, ironically. Yeah, she's got a ferry bus. Yeah.

Anyway, I don't know if you could, a ferry bus would get towed over the... Is your mum an orphan? Do you take your mum out to lunch? My mom's got two lovely parents. Is that the house? Is that the house? So she is an orphan?

Is that the house where you pick the orphan? Dad doesn't even know what an orphan is. That's not the house I've picked them up. Clint, Dad doesn't even know what an orphan is. He just said my mum's got two lovely parents. They're both dead. Yeah, but she had parents. That's what not, an orphan is somebody that lost both parents.

Anyway, this is pathetic. All I'm saying is I do, we all do work. We all fucking do philanthropy, Clint. We're all fucking working hard, mate. Any of those kids there in that photo at the orphanage, you recognize? All of them. All of them. Holy shit, because that was taken in 1847.

So, that's crazy. You've been doing an orphan work for over 100 years. That's crazy. You are dedicated. I am looking after their ancestors. They come from a long line of orphans. Oh, they look familiar because it's obviously their parents' parents. They're long line of orphans.

How did that happen? Because you've got to have the kids. Maybe it's different kids. I think that's, no, sorry, the reason I noticed them is because that poster is on the orphan wall. Oh, is that how you go? That's their alumni, isn't it? Alumni? Would you want to be an alumni of an orphanage? It's class of 72 or something. What is it?

Yeah, that's from Kaita. You must do go way up north to look after these kids. I go anywhere the orphans take me. Well, you know what? I actually, I'd like to apologise then because I thought you were full of shit at the start. Yeah, making it up. Yeah, but he does. And now I feel bad. Next time look out for Dan driving the orphan bus around Auckland. Yeah. And let me park where I want. is the Overthinkers podcast.

Rover, music, radio, podcasts.