The Edge Breakfast - OVERTHINKERS tugs or pints?

Episode Date: April 22, 2026

We’re spiralling.  Dan’s old diary entries have resurfaced, and it turns out he was a massive hater about Nick’s girlfriend back in the day—calling her a "skank" and a "sloth" after only 24 hours! Plus, we try to settle the ultimate group chat debate: have we had more pints or more tugs in our lifetime? The math gets dusty, the HR department is worried about our cereal lockers, and Dan tries to eat a dry Weet-Bix live on air. It’s chaos, it’s petty, and Dan’s libido is officially a topic of national concern. 00:00 – The Taylor Swift Melbourne trip betrayal. 01:54 – Dan’s Diary: The "Skank" girlfriend entry. 04:30 – The Pop-up Headlight "Fatty" incident. 05:40 – The Dry Weet-Bix Challenge begins. 07:20 – HR Intervention: The cereal-filled locker scandal. 09:30 – The Math: Pints vs. Tugs debate. 12:15 – 15 Beers a weekend? Clint’s habits under fire. 14:20 – Meg’s "Wodka" nightmare and Dan’s low libido.

This is a podcast from Rover. This is the Overthinkers podcast. Welcome, come me and Dan, hanging out with you. Good to see you, everyone. Good to feel you. Good to feel your presence. Just finished our radio show. So I'm about to jump into this one.

So if you don't know, you can listen to our show podcast. Or this one, what percentage? I'd love to know that. I know Meggy got the stats on all the different people that subscribe from around the world. But I'd love to know the percentage of people that listen to both or just one or the other. I think majority listens to both

would be very surprised to people that just listened to this and not our show. I wish we just got to do this one. Me too. The other one. The radio shows a real chore. Oh man, it's just a lot more... God, it sucks. More rules, a lot more format. There's a template. Yeah, there's a lot of people, a lot of cooks

in the kitchen, she's in the cab. Yeah, and there's a lot of people going, you should do this, and we go, oh, really? And they go, yep. And then we go, oh, we'll do it. And then it sucks, and we go, told you so. And then we were told what to do with this, and then we've kind of... This is the fun one. This is the fun thing.

Yeah, speaking of which, Dan's Diary, I did tease on here if you didn't get to listen to the show that I'm going to do a dance diary entry. It is not a new one, it's an old one, it's a revisit, but he's kind of an asshole in it, and he was obviously... He needed another meal. Dan gets really grumpy when he's angry,

so I thought I would read that, and we could go through what you said. You'd be no, you'd never probably been on the receiving end of my hangariness, Clint, have you? But me, yes. Oh, I have? But we were both angry at that point, I think. I wasn't hungry, I'd had dinner.

I was tired. Tell your face that. I was tired. No, you were so angry because we had to set up for the next day, and I was like, oh, get sorted. And it wasn't going to get sorted. That was fair enough. I thought you, you should have been angry at me for that, but you shouldn't be angry at me for the fact that I said, I'm not going to walk with you at 9 p.m. to go get Nandoz because we've already had dinner, you fat fuck.

I didn't say that. That was when you guys, oh, that was funny. That was when you guys went to Taylor Swift together without me. Yeah. It was all expenses payday by the boss. Yeah, we all slept in the same room. We still bickered. I remember, again, while we're on that then, for any way it doesn't know.

Yeah, very quickly, I went and ran to the kitchen just to go and get like a water. And you got about three minutes, maybe three and a half on a long song. And as I came back knowing that I only had about a minute left until we were back on here, I got stopped by the boss and, like, Taylor Swift was announcing, like, her tour and whether she was going to be coming to New Zealand or not. And he goes, hey, Clint, you're not a massive Taylor Swift fan, eh? and I was like, well, no, not like Megan Dan. Like, no, if I'm being honest.

Like, although I do really like her and I like her music. He goes, okay, cool, because we're going to surprise Megan Dan with a trip to Melbourne, all expenses paid to go and see Taylor Swift on the Erestor. And I'm like, and he goes, cool, keep it under wraps. And then walked off, and I knew how I had to be back on the year, and I was like, fuck I like going on free holidays with my mates to go to concerts. Yeah, it would have been so much.

I think we would have bickered less if Clint was there as well. He would be the buffer. But you're making it out, though, you've got it the whole time. We had one tiny little, this was the snappiness of it. He was like, well, I've got to go and have dinner. I was like, I need another dinner that was hardly a dinner. And then I was like, okay. And he was like, we've got to set this up, Meg.

And I was like, oh, yeah, okay. No, no, no, you did, you went like this. You were like, I remember you were like, Dan. You said something. No, you did like the Daniel. I am not going to, something like that. And I was like, oh, fast, I'm in the moot. And that was it, the rest of the time.

We're best friends. So can we please not say that we pick at them. I think we did either put your shoes in the beds back together. No, when I say bicker, I mean like we were, you know, like an old married couple. Like you'd be like, what do you want? No, and nanos? I don't want nannas. And then we'd just walk along, bickering, and then we'd have a kiss.

We'd kiss on the corner. Okay, well, Meg's doing your solo, because she's reading this entry of Dan's diary on the podcast because people that listen to this podcast, I think know us well enough that we can laugh along. But anyone who just randomly tuned in, I imagine Meg, on the radio show and heard this about Dan. Would have been like, yeah.

Would have been like, that guy sounds like. What you don't. I must come across badly if Meg's protecting me. It must be bad. Okay, all right. Let's play the intro, can we? Yep. Sit back and relax while we dive into Dan's Diary.

Nick and Sarah are starting to annoy me. This is, they're branding you together, girlfriend and boyfriend. Oh, that's the fake name, thank you. You're welcome. She thinks that she knows him, but she doesn't. Not like I know him. Oh, sounds like you're in love with him. Jesus.

It's ruining our friendship. By the way, if I go the page beforehand, literally, Nick has a new girlfriend, but she's a skank, and that was a day ago. He's got a new girlfriend. No, no, that was his, like, he's only been with her for a day, is what I'm saying. And Dan's like, he's changed. Can I just say, I do remember this, and it wasn't just me that thought it.

There was a number of us within the group that were like, she's changing him, he doesn't hang out with us anymore. It's been a day. I know. Yeah, but that's what I mean. Like, give him the benefit. He's just, He literally got to know her that day.

It was like Yoko Ono when the Beatles when she came into the Beatles and split them up. It's really enough friendship. He only likes her because she's hot and you did inverted comments so you don't think she's hot, clearly. Oh, she was just very plain. Just plain Jane, you know, like very...

You would have been a better pick for Nick, do you think? No, no, it's nothing to do with that. As I say, there was numerous amount of us that thought the same thing. the personality of a sloth. Now she's coming to the foo fighters, and she doesn't even like them. I'm over her, in her skirts, a seven sizes too small for her.

Skank. She had been with him for 24 hours. Now, it might have been... This is my deepest, darkest thoughts in here. I never imagine what... In my whole being that I would ever be read out to people. Okay. One of the pop-up headlights broke in my car

because some fatty sat on it. Jesus. And now it doesn't pop up. I just have a Honda record and it had it was my favorite thing. Oh, and they'd have like those. Headlights like eyes. Yeah, so you'd turn on the headlights and they'd pop up out of the bonnet. Oh, it was my pride enjoy.

I don't know who it was, but I know they were fat because I could see them sitting on it from class. Some low life. Caught the bus home and sat next to a guy that smelled like beef shit day. Far out, that was a bad day. Or then you had lunch, you had a sausage, sizzle and wheat bicks. And dinner you had a roast lamb. So it was a good dinner.

for lunch Your mum tried You had it right My mum used to put in the lunch box It'd be like wheatbicks with butter So she'd like a piece of biscuit

butter and then marmite Or veggie mite And I'd eat them and try it It's delicious That sounds so dry It was young I one time did The

What's that Fair Factor Birthday with my family And one of the Literal dears Was to eat two wheatbicks And like three pieces of wet bread And nobody could get through it And you just had it for lunch every day

Mm It'd take it You'd like a minute. They're having a fair fact of lunch. Thank you. I loved it. A dry wheat bags. No, but it would have been dry.

By the time I got to lunchtime because the butter and the, like it was still quite dry, but not at the point. Do you have some with you now? No. Speaking of wheat bags, I forgot to bring this up. Actually spoke with a woman in HR that works here. Oh, what do I do? He's the drug. Weems, can you eat one?

Dry? It's so impossible. No, it's not. He's need a weeper. You're going to... It's so dry. It's not important. You're fucked for the rest of this pod now.

No, I'm not. Maybe his mouth has got... Like, evolution. Like, it's evolved to create more saliva. Yeah. Say something. I don't have to. I actually, I can keep doing the podcast.

I've already eaten most of it. Well, you would have been very good but... Dan's going to be getting, you know, putting his finger in his mouth and trying to like scoop out, wait back time the next six hours. It's actually really nice. Yeah, so the lady in human resources

I was talking to her and so was Carl about lockers. And we got emails at the end of last year about clearing them out. No, no, I never replied. You never replied, Dad, but you should have because they had to get seated at the cleaner. Oh, that's right. I had to get seed at the

cleaner to vacuum out the six surrounding lockers because for some reason, and your locker was so full of cereals. And the cereals had spread. And apparently, apparently, Carlos is true. 100% true.

I'm trying to get Rebecca our receptionist on now. Poor woman. Apparently, your witerbicks had just, like, flaked somehow everywhere. That's the rest I never used to because I would open it and go, fuck, what's going on? So how many cereals? She said it was just jam-packed with cereal boxes. I love cereal.

I've spoken about it before. I would love cereal. It's one of my things. Like, the more sugar-y-the-serial, the better. Like, at the moment, I'm in a Nutra-Grain buzz. But I do love, like, the Milo cereal checks. I'm great. Anyway, and then it was a point where, because I had so much shit,

it wasn't just wheat bakes. There'd be like a check there, a rice bubble there. And I think it was just got so clogged with cereal that I just sort of forgot. I was like, that's done to me. That's a bin now. That locker is dead to me. And I just closed it and I hope don't forget about it. And then they've had to go and eb-ed-ed-out.

That mortifies me. Yeah, and they open it. They're like, damn, where I'm going to be empty it. open and they're like, fucking out. There's like 17 bucks of cereal in it. There was condoms in there. You're not even sex with the cereal, are you? No, but like there was just shit that I'd just throw in there.

Like, we'd set stuff. And I'd throw it in there. Like, it would have been like, what the fuck is this guy? You're not sticking. You still got a way big. You're not sticking your dick in the holes of the Nutragrine, are you? No, no, no, no, no. Too big.

It's like trying a sausage over all way, Clint. Okay. Today on the Overtinkers podcast. We're overthinking. All right, this is an insight to what it's like working with men behind the scenes off-air from, honestly, 5.30 in the morning. These boys, Nipia Carl, Dan and Clint have been talking about whether... What?

Do you think you have had more pints or tugs in your life? Pikes. They both look at each other. They both look at each other. We're shocked that the other person's answered wrong. Yeah, so that's wanks or pints. And can I also say this started in a group chat yesterday. Clint and Dan discussing that. Dan was even doing the mathematics of how many times

he had a wank who was 16. So I'd want to hear the mathematics. Yeah, go on. So I went to chat GPT because I'm not good at maths. And I said, if I go on here, Estimate of Life Events. So I said, to chat GPT,

how many times have I masturbated in my life so far? I came back and said no one's keeping official stats, but you can bullpark it pretty easily. Take. Average time. per week, multiply by 52 times a year, then multiply by how many times you've been, dot, dot, dot, active. So I said, I'm 37 and do it average of two times every week.

No, averaging it out, because I think I would have done it more when I was younger. I don't, I genuinely don't do it very often now. I'd say maybe once a week. So if I average, maybe three times, I don't know. But I did an average of two times a week since I was 16. He said, all right, let's run the numbers. 16 to 37 is 21 years. If you're doing it two times per week at 52 weeks per year, that's 104 per year.

You've done it 2,184 times. There's no way I've had anywhere near 2,000 pints. Can you... And I think you're on the lower of average of two weeks. Oh, definitely. I'm not a drinker. No, no, I mean you're tug. Yeah, I think I probably would be on the lower. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And I said, easily, are there more pints than tugs easily? And Dan's, now his other group chat with his other boys, I like Clint's fucking lying. I would, if you had a gun to my head, and if I get the answer wrong, I'd die. And you said tugs or pints, I would lock in pints. Okay, well, let's do the math. So I die if I'm wrong. Like, realistically, you've done it the other thing, apart from pints.

So you're, how old are you? 39. Yep. And so you've been doing it for, since you were, what, 16, probably earlier, knowing you? I just wasn't really doing that a lot. The only thing I'm going off, even if I've got a similar number to you at 2000, I just thought how many pints I had last week. With, like, football, we easily have, like, two or three after the game.

Then I went to a concert, so I preloaded before and had four beers. I had a couple of beers, like, after the concert. And then that was just Saturday. Okay. So I'm like, there's no way if I'm putting it. away in a weekend and I've tried not to drink Sunday to Thursday. But then even yesterday I was at the gym and one of my mates

just texted me beer and I was at where and I was leaving the gym and I went and had a couple of points with him. So if I'm putting away 10 to 15 beers a week, there's no way I'm tugging it 15 times a week on average across my life, even though I only started drinking from 18. Are an alcoholic. So I've plugged into it that the fact that you would maybe average out

the same as me to a week for your whole life since you started doing it and it's assuming you started around the same age as me, it's saying that you would have done it 3,196 times in your lifetime. So you're telling me that you've had nearly 3,200 pints in your life. Well, I'm just basing off even, like,

I haven't tugged it at all in the last week, and I have had 10 pints, as an average guess. Maybe 10 pints this week? That's shocking. It's only Thursday. No, I'm counting week to week, Thursday to Thursday.

So I'm counting the weekend that's being like, Yeah, but Clint, I guess also, yeah, I guess we're just talking about tugs, not sexual activity, because you would have been... Yeah, and then also I did a five years of no sex as well, like in the lead-up, and then maybe I had a lot of tugs then, I don't know. It's hard to remember. It was a long time ago. It's really interesting. Because I just, I think I've had, I could count maybe a hundred points in my life. I've had a hundred. Wow. A hundred pints in your life. Yeah. Like a pint, I'd always go for a bottle of beer. If I'm going to have a beer, I'd always go, what's in the...

I'd have a bottle of Hineken or something. I would never go. or full pint of something. Yeah, but I mean, I'm counting a pint as like a beer. Just a beer. I'm saying a beer in my head because that's very English. So you're just saying a beer or a wang, right?

Yeah, I'm not counting like an espresso martini or a rum and coke. You're not counting other alcohols? Well, mostly just drink beer, but I'll have other stuff every now and then. Wow. That's shocking. Yeah, but I think... Did you guys notice that Boss Jack on the Zoom call we had before looked like he was drinking a whiskey?

Did anybody else? Did anybody else notice that? He had a short glass full of a... amber liquid and ice. So I'm just saying that's a really... And that was at like 10 a morning. Yeah, that's a really weird thing. But you know when you wake up and you're like, oh fuck, I'm dusty.

And then I sometimes will go back and do the maths. And I'm like, I had two at football. Then we got home. I had three then. It's five. And you got one of the gigs six, two and I got back six, seven. You're talking beers? Yeah, yeah. And then you're like, like, and then you go,

oh, that's why I feel like shit because they had like eight beers. Over the course of, I don't know, from like three in the afternoon till midnight 1 a.m. But you would have had a lot of catchy. Sorry, we're going on too long about this, but you would have had a lot of time where you weren't drinking beer younger in your life.

Like when you were 15, 16, where you were doing it probably three or four times. When you were the worst? Yeah, when we were the worst when we were young, when we were 18, you'd go out and get like a 15 box for 15 bucks. Like, easy a baga. It was like a dollar a bottle. Like, we were trying to get the cheapest beer we could.

And then funnels? We were doing funnels as kids just smashing like two of them in a go. I mean, I just, honest to God, I put my, I put my kid's life on it that I've had more. more pints than wanes. I guess this is a conversation that girls can't have because they're not doing it as much

are they and they don't drink pints. What about wines or flicks? We need probably something more radio like... Wines or flicks, me, go on then. Fuck me. I hate wine. We all know that and normally like mix it with something.

Sugar cubes, Coke, whatever I can find, really, to mix it with. You shouldn't admit to that on the radio. I used to make... Oh, really? What? What?

You shouldn't admit to that. Why? Coke. Oh, yuck. One time when I was younger, I used to mix it with vodka and call it vodka. It was terrible. Don't do that. I was literally got alcohol poisoning from it.

But I don't like wine, but I still think probably more wines. I was a very heavy drinker when I was younger in my 20s. Although... I look like an idiot. You look like a giant wanker. I had a lot of time by myself. I had a lot of time. It's an interesting thing to actually think about.

I would say drinks only because I was such a heavy drinker. Yeah. And there are times that you don't look back and go, I remember when I was tugging it 15 times a week. Do you know what I mean? Like I've never looked back and gone. I did that 15 times that week. Whereas I could look back and go,

I put 15 beers away that weekend. Like over a Friday night and a Saturday. You are so different. It's only 7 bears a night. Like if you're going out on a Friday and you're going out on a Saturday, we're talking 10 to 15 beers. But when the last time we had 10 to 15 tugs in a weekend? Nah

Speak for yourself, boy Hey, you're the giant wanker Who's had two and a thousand wanks No I definitely have more than two a week On average, fuck off I genuinely think that would be Like early on in my early career

I think probably would have been more Like once a day Twice a day Twice a day Never I've never done it more than once a day You've never went more than once a day Bullshit

I haven't What are you talking about? I've never I'm morning and then night Nah Oh Are you doing twice Very rarely.

I think it would be, I'd count on one hand the amount of times I've done it. Maybe it would have been I maybe did it in the morning by myself and then in the afternoon I had sex. I can't even, I wouldn't be able to count how many times I've done that more than the month of the day. And then it rolled around the following day and around lunchtime, still within a 24-hour period. But I've never gone like within the matter of hours in between. Nah.

What? I think I have. Yeah, I would have. But I'm just not a like, I'm not, yeah, my libido is weird. I don't have much of a libido. Because you wait too much. a deeper issue. Sorry, we've got quite deep here.

Anyway, I've got to go. Yeah, sorry about that. We'll just end on Dan's depressing libido then. Overe thinkers.