The Eric Metaxas Show - Emerson Eggerich

Episode Date: May 15, 2025

Relationship expert Emerson Eggerich is back with a new book: Speak Your Mind.

Right now, women in Sudan are being enslaved just for believing in Jesus. I've supported Christian Solidarity International for years because they're out there freeing these women and helping them start a new life. This month, we're on a mission to free 100 more. Just $250 rescues one woman from slavery and helps her start a new life. Will you please help us reach that goal? Call 888-253-3522 or go to metaxisot.com and click on the Christian Solidarity banner. let's set them free in Jesus name.

Noble gold investments is the official gold sponsor of the Eric Mataxis show, a company that specializes in gold IRAs and physical delivery of precious metals. Learn how you can protect your wealth with noble gold investments. That's noble gold investments.com. Welcome to the Eric Mataxis show. It's a nutritious smoothie of creamy, fresh yogurt, vanilla protein powder, and a mushy banana. for your mind? Drink it all down.

It's numby. I wub, vanilla. I wop, I wopanella. Here comes Eric Metaxus. Hey, folks. Wednesday, May 14th.

Okay, today, I'm airing a conversation I had with my good friend Emerson Egerich. He's the author of the love and respect blockbuster book. In Hour 2, we have Braden Sorbo.

But right now, I did an Ask Metaxus recently, and I want to run that right now. Those are always fun. So AskMetaxis after that. Emerson Eggrich. Hey there, folks. You know, we love to do these segments when we have time to sneak them in. People write in with comments or questions or whatever. So I think I have some questions. We have some comments. But Chris Himes, you fielded a comment. Somebody wrote to us, they were upset about something I said. Yeah, I'm sort of like the outer layer of the atmosphere. You protecting the inner layer of the metaxis media world.

And we got a letter recently from somebody who thought we were making fun of the Pope being dead, poking fun of the Pope, also known as Pope poking. But we weren't really doing that. Well, I guess what's the problem? They just making fun of the fact that I don't know. This Pope, you know, my most devoted Catholic friends have nothing good to say about this Pope. they believe he's a wicked man and an atheist. So I just don't understand what was the problem.

Anyway, I don't know what to say. People get all weird. Okay. I have a few comments that people have written in, and I guess I just wanted to read some of them. So I'm going to read, this is called listeners. A listener writes, a listener named Daniel Shinas. writes, Mr. Metaxus, that would be me. I'm about halfway through Bonhofer, your book, and enjoy it immensely. It is a very difficult subject, but you handle it very well. I'm particularly struck by the paragraphs that begin at the bottom of page 143 in the chapter called the Furer Principle, wherein you describe why Germany was ripe for an autocrat after the failure of the Weimar Republic. And then Daniel quotes me, Germany had no his, this is me in my book,

Bonhofer book. Germany had no history of democracy and no idea how it worked. So the country broke apart into a riot of factions with each faction blaming the others for everything that went wrong. This much they knew. Under the Kaiser, there had been law and order and structure. Now there was chaos. So the German people clamored for order and leadership. That's what I write in my book. And basically, I say that's what opened the door to their wanting Hitler to tell. take control or allowing him to take control. So this reader continues, or this viewer or listener continues. These passages in your book also perfectly describe the atmosphere and challenge that faces every post-aocratic society such as Iraq and Afghanistan in the early 21st century,

post-Soviet Russia, most of Africa. The list goes on. I've tried to explain why it's not true that those people don't want democracy, but never found the right words. In just a few paragraphs in your book, you described it perfectly. Thank you. I've not read yet read Amazing Grace, your biography on William Wilberforce, but I love the movie and put the book on my list. I look forward to reading it after I finish Bonhofer and many others ahead of it. I'm afraid. Thanks again. Well, well, thanks to you, Daniel, for writing to us and for the kind remarks about my book. And regarding that issue, it is very interesting because I think I write about this a little bit in my book, if you can keep it. There is a naivete. George Bush was the poster boy for this naivete that

everybody wants democracy. I think I would argue that God wants everyone to want democracy, to have an ordered republic like we have in America, that that would be God's will. But there are many people that aren't ready for that. There are many people that if you don't, well, you have to deal with the reality on the ground. And so when the allies following World War I imposed the Weimar Republic, this kind of democratic government on Germany following the rule of the Kaiser, they really opened the door to Adolf Hitler because they said, well, we don't like the Kaiser. but the problem is that things can get a lot worse. You say, well, we don't like the Kaiser.

Well, could it be worse than the Kaiser? Yeah, it could be much worse. And they opened the door to that. And that has happened recently. You know, we got rid of Saddam Hussein. Was he bad? You better believe he was really bad. But what happened when we got rid of Saddam Hussein?

Radical Muslims come in. And we have infinitely less religious liberty under the radical Muslim. than we had under Saddam Hussein. The same thing with Afghanistan. We say, oh, they're voting now. Well, how's that going? What's going on in Libya? We got rid of MoMAQaddafi.

He was a bad guy. What we have is now arguably much worse. So it's interesting that in history, you see these mistakes being made over and over where naive people say that we can somehow impose democracy. You can't do that, folks. The reason I wrote my book, if you can keep it, is to say, say that if the people themselves don't keep the republic, if they don't create the republic, fight for the republic, keep the republic, you just can't say, well, here's your

constitution, and now it's going to work. It doesn't work. It eventually falls apart. And so what this person is writing about by referencing my book in Bonhoeffer, that's exactly what happened in Germany. The allies in this ham-fisted way said, we're going to impose democracy So the Kaiser's out. You no longer have a monarchy. You no longer have a Kaiser, which is the German word for Caesar. You don't have that anymore. Now you've got this democracy. And the democracy, they didn't know how to function in democracy. They hadn't created their own democracy. They hadn't created their own system of government. It was imposed on them. And it turned into a mess. And into that mess comes Adolf Hitler. And so that happens in history. And it's why, I guess,

I've said this many times that what we have in America, the reason I want America to be strong is because we have to show the world what ordered liberty can look like, what it can look like for the people to govern themselves. It's not easily done. It takes great effort, great sacrifice. And so if you do it, you can export that idea. People can say, I want some of that. How do you do that? Well, at the heart of it all is virtue, people of faith. If you don't have virtue, people of virtue, people of faith, you cannot have the ordered liberty bequeath to us by the founders in our Constitution. You can't keep the Republic, to quote Benjamin Franklin. It doesn't work. And so whenever well-meaning, naive people, you know, like the allies following World War I,

like George Bush, they say, well, those people, they want democracy, here's some democracy. It just falls apart because it doesn't, it can't sustain it. The people have to understand it. They have to understand how it works and they have to live it out. And that's why it's so important that Americans understand. This is an opportunity for me to say, I hope if you have a copy of it, read my book if you can keep it because it is really vital that Americans understand this. It's absolutely vital.

And we haven't been teaching it in our schools. And I wrote my book because once I understood it, I was amazed. I said, how is it possible that I have not understood this? most people I know don't understand this. Most Americans don't understand it. Most Christians don't understand it. We need to understand it because we've been getting this wrong. And so I think I'm really hopeful for our future that people are beginning to understand this again.

But I, well, I guess I recommend that if you don't have a copy, you can buy my book if you can keep it. Because it is very, these issues are very, very important. I've talked about them a lot. I haven't talked about them much on this program. Let me read one other viewer email because we only have a few seconds in the segment. Hello, Mr. Metaxus. My name is Eamon Kreider. I know I'm probably one of thousands of emails.

Not true. Maybe barely hundreds. But I just wanted to say how grateful I am for what you've done through your books and radio show. Going through high school with atheistic teachers severely shook my faith. And it was your books and also your radio show, having guests like John Lennox, that really helped me intellectually fight the lies and worries that that, that that kind of environment can plant in your head. Just wanted to say thanks for all you've done and

God bless you. Wow. Praise God. That thrills me. Yeah, if you want to get my books, most of them are available everywhere, but you can go to Socratesandasitin City.com, get signed copies. Or you can go to my store.com, get really cheap copies. I mean, really cheap prices. Mystore.com, if you use the code Eric, we'll be right back. There's been a national focus on eating only the healthiest of foods, and that's great news for Balance of Nature. Their method of producing a vibrant nutritional supplement is second to none. While so many others use chemicals and additives, balance of nature is made solely from whole food ingredients.

While others' methods sacrifice nutritional quality for the sake of profits and volume, balance of nature's advanced vacuum cold process involves freeze drying the fruits and veggies into a fine powder retaining up to 93% of their nutritional value compared to others' methods who are lucky to salvage as little as 30%. Bounce of Nature packs a nutritional punch, and that's the whole reason for taking Bounce of Nature, getting the most nutrition for the sake of your health. Use my discount code Eric to get 35% off plus free shipping and their money back guarantee. That's Eric to get 35% off plus free shipping and their money back guarantee. Call them at 800-2468-751, 800-2468-751. Use discount code Eric or order online at balanceofnature.com.

Mike Lindell and the MyPillow team want to say a big thank you for your continued support. This spring, they had a huge allotment of their famous bed sheets set aside for the big box stores. But guess what? The stores didn't come through again. So Mike's doing what he does best, passing the savings on to you. That's right. No middleman means you get wholesale pricing on their top of the line, Giza Dreams and Perkale bedsheets. Listen to this. The Giza Dream Sheets, Queen size normally 139-98, now just 69.

99. The Prokale sheets, queen, normally 89,998. Now just 2998. All sizes available at a discount rate. These are premium sheets at prices you won't find anywhere else, but they won't last long when they're gone. They're gone. So don't wait. Go to Mypillow.com. Use promo code Eric or call 800-858-0-263. 800-8-0263 to grab this exclusive deal. That's Mypillot.com. promo code Eric or call 800-858-0-263. promo code Eric. Welcome back. It kind of becomes like a joke, half the time on the program I say, I'm going to have my friend on, so and so. It's not just that I only have my friends on. It's just that over the years and decades, I have become friends with so many wonderful people.

And they're the people that I would have on here anyway, except by now I know them as a friend. One of those friends, for example, my guest right now, Dr. Emerson Egarich, who lives in Michigan. we've known each other many, many years, and he has a new book out, and I get to talk to him about it. Emerson, welcome back. Thank you. In fact, one of our unique experiences,

we were together in Manhattan having breakfast on 9-11. They're in that time of life. Never forget it, nor I know will you. Well, yeah, it's so horrifying to think that you and I were having this wonderful breakfast, and I walked back. You walked with me back. to our apartment back then.

Well, people were looking up. Do you remember they were? I don't remember that. No, all I know is I said, well, I'll see you later. And I go upstairs and there's a message on my answering machine. Of course, this was a gorgeous day, September 11th, 2001. Message on my answering machine, Eric, have you seen what's going on the World Trade Center to turn on the TV and I turn on the TV.

And suddenly I entered another world right after our breakfast. It's unbelievable that we're talking 24 years ago. It's insane, Emerson. I can't believe the time this. past. Well, you, a lot of folks know you because of this blockbuster book you wrote. I never forget, I never remember the subtitle. It's love and respect. What is the subtitle? Or is there? Yeah, no, I mean, the respect that he desperately needs and the desire that she has to be loved. And it's based on Ephesians 533, where that distinction is made that we all need love and respect equally. Yes. But

it has really taken off. And Sarah and I have been doing our love and respect marriage conferences for many moons now, yes. It's crazy because I remember before you wrote that book, you wrote a book before that book, and I was involved in working with you on that in some extent. I can't remember the details, but it's so long ago. Yeah, motivating your man God's way. And I brag about the fact that Eric Metaxus was my editor. Isn't that crazy?

Is that just amazing? It's so long ago, and yet, wow. But I remember, you know, when I, when we, I'm sorry, when I heard your story of how you as a pastor, I haven't said it, that you, you know, you were a pastor in Grand Rapids. For how many years were you a pastor? Yeah, actually, East Lansing, Michigan, Michigan State.

We now are in the Grand Rapids area, but yes, college town, Spartans. And so from 1980 to 1999, senior pastor studying the Bible 30 hours a week for the exposition of Scripture and just honored to be called to do that. But that's when I made that discovery in Ephesians 533. Well, what I said, and I'm always shocked because you feel like everything's been discovered. No, it hasn't. And God in his mercy allows us to see something new that no one has seen, you know, in 2000 years. And you saw in that verse, what is the exact verse? Ephesians 533.

Okay. Where a husband is commanded to love his wife and a wife is commanded to respect her husband. No debate on the first part. A lot of debate on the second part. But I discover what you perhaps are going to be asking about and that's the crazy cycle. Yeah. I forget. I always forget.

That's the funny part. I love that phrase you coined the crazy cycle. But no, but the point I'm trying to make with my audience here is that you saw in that scripture, you said, wait a minute. wait a minute, why does the scripture say husbands love your wives and why does it say wives respect your husband? What is that? And in the modern era, a lot of women in particular would be kind of offended by that. And you're thinking, well, wait a minute. This is the word of God. The word of God is not some harsh patriarchal text. It's not the Quran. man, what is God saying? And your ability to exeat that, to explain that amazed me. And of course,

you came up with this larger concept, love, and respect why this is how men see things differently than women do and how God made us complementarily. We're supposed to be different, and we are different. and men are motivated by being respected, as you put it. Women are motivated by being loved. And so it doesn't get men, you know, nobody gets a free ride here, but you explain it in a way that, you know, it's not just biblical, but it's been profoundly helpful to men and women in their marriages because suddenly you think, oh, oh, I didn't see this before.

I didn't get this before. So it's a big deal, and it's why the book has been such a huge bestseller and continues to sell in various versions and why you've been talking about this for years because you put your finger on something that is just, you know, a gigantic. No, well said. No, well said. And on that point, we've interviewed 7,000 surveyed them, and 83% of the men say they feel disrespected during conflict. We ask the question, when you're in a conflict with your spouse, do you feel unloved at that moment? are disrespected. 83% of the men say they feel disrespected. Now, we can either dismiss that as ego, narcissism, or maybe there's a vulnerability there. He may not be able to communicate it well,

but is there a need there that only she can meet? And 72% of the women say they feel unloved. And so when she feels unlove, though, she tends to react in that disrespectful way. She's not trying to be, but she comes across that way. And once the fear is settled in a woman's heart, she says, yeah, no, I do. come across disrespectful, but he should know I don't mean it. And of course, when he feels

disrespect it, he tends to withdraw and pull back. And that feels very unloving to her. But the crazy cycle, you know, continues to spin until people are able to decode it. Yeah. I just love the fact that you coined the term the crazy cycle because it's what happens. So if I, whatever I do wrong, Suzanne's tendency might be to behave in a way inadvertently that comes across to me as disrespectful, which really offends me. And so that I become less loving, which makes her be even less respectful, which makes me even less loving. And you probably don't know this, but we've been divorced 40 times. It's terrible. It's so embarrassing. It's so embarrassing. No, but it's just kind of interesting that you put your finger on something that most married couples,

I think, would identify with. Yeah, that does happen to us. And I know that you've done, you know, somebody counseling with so many couples that you know and I know that most couples in a loving relationship, they don't mean it. They don't want to make things worse. That's right. In a way, because of the fall, because of our brokenness, our instinct is to react in a way that actually makes things worse. So again, the fact that the answer is in the scripture, but it needs exegesis. So that's why whenever anybody says, well, just read the Bible. It's like, well, no. No, no. You know, that's nice to read the Bible, but you have to understand what it's saying. You have to have somebody, in many cases, I should say, explain what's going on. And you really, God has used you tremendously in this area. Do you ever marvel at that? Because I have to say that, you know, when people say like, oh, wow, your Bonhofer book changed my life. I'm thinking, who am I? How did it happen that I got to be the one to see something that others hadn't seen or seen or whatever? I mean, I know you have to be somewhat amazed because there's a lot of pastors out there preaching

and somehow God gave you this gift to give others. No, I appreciate that. No, I am. I wonder sometimes about that, but I'm very grateful. And I think part of this is coming out of my own family of origin, my dad's rage issues. I was sent to military school. So I saw two people who had basic goodwill who honestly misunderstood each other, but they got on that crazy cycle, but they didn't have language to understand it.

and they didn't know that their defensive reactions were offensive. Oh, that's a, I know you've used all these lines hundreds of times before in these courses that you teach some laughing, but what a great line. Their defensive reactions were offensive. That's exactly what we're talking about. Oh, my gosh. Well, you, so yeah, so you're so known for the love and respect conferences and the book. but part of this has to do, of course, with communication. And so you have a new book out now about communication itself.

The book, I have a copy here. It's called Speak Your Mind, Evaluating and Unleashing Your Communication Strengths. And I realize that there's no blurb on the book from me. So my first question is, how good could it be, really? Come on. Without your endorsement. That's why I'm so excited about you doing the interview. But also, you know, you have demonstrated this.

And this has been your appeal over the last, you know, decade, if not more, of encouraging pastors in particular to speak their minds. Bonhofer, you know, is unique among those German pastors who were silent during the Nazi regime. And you have been promoting the importance of speaking. But I think, you know, we know that there are some people who hold back because they, they are fearful or they don't know how. There are other people who blunt out way too much. and end up undermining their credibility as well as the name of Christ.

But you have found a balance here, and I'd really kind of like to interview you, because in the book, I talk about four critical questions that we've got to ask before we write or speak. And I see you having lived this out, and I would love to be able to ask you, hey, tell us more about this. Let me tell you about all the friends I've lost by behaving in the way that I've behaved. When we come back, I'm going to let Emerson ask me these questions. And we're talking about his book. It's Dr. Emerson Egerich.

My guest, the book is Speak Your Mind. We'll be right back. Make like Mr. Milk Toast, you'll get shut out. Welcome back. I'm talking to my friend, Dr. Emerson Egerich. He has a new book out. You may know him from his huge bestseller, love and respect. The new book is called Speak Your Mind, Evaluating and Unleashing Your Communication Strength.

So, Emerson, you're under the, I think, false impression that I know how to communicate in a way that is winsome. So I don't know what you're thinking, but go ahead, go ahead. Well, in the book, I talk about, well, it actually goes way back when I was at Wheaton College in the chapel. And someone said, and I don't even remember who it was, but during that chapel service, they said, before you speak, ask three questions. Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?

and that just, I had an epiphany. I mean, for me, I was just at that moment where that was very important for me, because I wanted to be a good communicator. I didn't want to mess up. I felt God was calling me to preach and teach. And so I thought, you know, and I really want to improve in this area, and that hit me. And so I meditated on those three, but then I remember trying to practice those. And at the end of me thinking I was truthful, kind, necessary, people said, what are you trying to say?

what's your point? And I'd kind of say, well, I know what I mean. I just can't say it sometimes. And I remember years later, professor's saying, if you can't say it, you don't know what you mean. And since then, we've researched these four. Dr. Brown at Region University did a massive study on this, and these are distinct.

We could say, you know, legs on a chair. Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary? Is it clear? And if you take one of those away, the chair collapses. And those do they don't bleed. They don't bleed over into each other.

I have to give you a little pushback just for clarity here, right? Please. Is it kind? The question, of course, is to whom? And the second question with regard to whether it is kind, is it kind if the person who's hearing it doesn't hear it as kind? Because I would say that we can make an idol of kindness or winsomeness and end up silencing ourselves because some things are hard to say,

or at least they're initially hard to say or hard to hear. And I think that I have in the last, oh, I don't know, decade really changed in many ways on this issue, because I think that I was afraid to say things that might rub someone the wrong way. But then I came to a conclusion that sometimes by not saying the thing, in fact, you're being unkind, ultimately. So I think a lot of Christians, when they hear that, you know, it sounds very nice and it's very Christian, you know, is it this, is it that, is it kind, implies something that might not be true. In other words, I don't think you're saying it, but I want to clarify it, right? Because there's a time that you might have to say something that feels like a punch, but you're not punching to.

hurt someone, you're punching because you're, in other words, it depends on the context, I guess, is what I would say. Yeah, no, you brilliantly said it. And I go in depth on that in the book. And I think, first of all, this is about who I'm going to be, whether the other person receives it or not. I think sometimes we think that if this person is rejecting that maybe I didn't communicate it well, and I define kindness as I'm going to be a loving, respectful person. I'm going to be a civil person as I communicate this truth. Now, they may not receive it, but that doesn't mean that I have to be hostile and contemptuous and laxibility to get a truth across. And I think also to your point, truth without kindness can be cruelty, but kindness without truth is permissive and enabling.

Yeah, and ultimately is cruel. You know, I think to myself, how many pastors have been bamboozled into thinking that, well, I have to be careful what I say about the transition. because there may be someone who is pushed away from God or from the church if I say something. And I think, well, you can you can tie yourself in nuts thinking that way. Of course, you don't want to be gratuitous. You don't want to be mean gratuitously or cruel. But by being silent, you will be cruel in other ways. And you're going to be harming people, except you won't see the harm. You get to pat yourself on the back and say, well, I never said anything unkind or anything harsh. So it's such a tricky thing, that balance of knowing when do I speak and what is

the context of speaking. And what's one of them is it, is it, is it necessary? That's another great one. Is it necessary? Because I, and you can just react to this, but I have just seen in my life, I know that I could say something, but I have a gut sense that it will have no fruit so I don't say it, because what's the point of just arguing with somebody for the sake of arguing? And if you're not actually able to move somebody, there sometimes is no point in saying it, or that's not the time to say it. No, these are excellent insights. I mean, Jesus was silent before Pontch's pilot.

I mean, there's a recognition that the individual is not going to receive it, so what's the point in trying to say it? But I think even, I'll circle back to this necessary in just a moment, but coming back to kindness, I think we have a thump or theology. if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all. And we have this, did you, we've created this idea of niceness and what niceness looks like. And as a result of that, we've compromised on the truth because we haven't developed the ability, the skill,

and I'd go ahead and lengthen this book, to be able to deliver the truth in a way that can at least increase the odds that the person's going to receive it. But even if they don't receive it, then we can say when we sense they're shutting down, well, forgive me, I'm trying to communicate this lovingly respectfully. maybe I'm not doing a good job of it. I certainly am not trying to hurt you.

I'm trying to help the situation. I'm trying to understand you. Usually that can be disarming, given that we're in a face-to-face encounter with people. But we have to speak the truth. And this is what you've been so good at and what you're appealing for people to do. And on to the issue of necessary, yeah,

there's a time to speak and time not to speak. And is this the time? Should I wait on it? Should I not say anything at all? And sometimes even in marriage we say, and one more thing. Yeah. Hang on. We're going to go to a break. We're going to come back to this in a second. I'm talking to Emerson Eggerich. The new book, Speak Your Mind. Folks, welcome back. I'm talking to my friend, Dr. Emerson Eggerich. You probably know him from his book, love and respect. The new book is called Speak Your Mind, evaluating, evaluating and unleashing your communication strengths with the assumption that you have any. It's kind of funny. But in all seriousness, you were just, well, you were making a point about. is it necessary? And I think a lot of folks, they communicate, what's the word? It's almost,

well, emotionally, or it's almost like impressionism. It's like you kind of throw this stuff out there and you're not sure what people are going to see, but you feel, I think this is part of the culture going back to the romantic era. It's like the last 200 years. It's a very Freudian idea. These are bad ideas, folks. It's that expressing yourself is the point. Let it out. Say what's on your mind. There's truth there, but it also can be very, very harmful because it makes it all about,

I had to say what I had to say and who cares what people think? Well, God cares what people think. So how we actually communicate clearly successfully, that actually does matter. And I think a lot of times, particularly in arguments, people think, well, I just, I had to say it. there's always going to be some truth there, sometimes saying something that you didn't have the courage to say at another time, just getting it out there, that can have value. But I guess it makes me wonder, when you wrote the book, for whom did you write the book? What made you think I need to? Who were you speaking to in writing the book? Well, Joy, my daughter wanted me to write the book

because all during her upbringing, I tried to live by those four questions in my own life. And so I lived that way, tried to. And then I tried to co-cher on that and Jonathan and David as well. And then she said, Dad, this needs to be out in a book. But then, of course, the target audience are those people who hold back. They're fearful for the reasons we've been kind of talking about. There are people who are just blunt. You know, they just, they just do to the point we're talking about,

I'm just going to tell you my truth. I'm just going to tell it like it is. That was in the 70s. But then there are other people that they know they're an average communicator and they want to improve because people fear dying of cancer less than they fear, you know, speaking. They, the idea of communicating is more fearful than dying of cancer, I'm trying to say. And so I realize there are a whole lot of people out there that want the skill. And that's why I've gone in depth creating an assessment tool to discover your strengths and challenge you in the area of weakness.

It's an in-depth assessment of that, kind of like a strength finder, to help them recognize those strengths, and to move forward on that. And that is so crucial, in my opinion, to the point that you're making. So in the book, speak your mind, you actually do make a way in the book to evaluate what the reader's communication strengths are. There are 80 questions.

80, wow. Yeah, and I don't want people to be overwhelmed by that. They can be, but under each of those four, there are 20 nuances. I've done a lot of research and a lot of look at it. It isn't just a matter speaking, the truth. There are nuances to all that. Same thing with kindness.

Same thing with necessary. Same thing with clarity. And so within that, I break it down and help people understand where they're strong in that area, where they need to maybe shore it up a little bit. But it's a big deal. And my concern is that people might feel overwhelmed by this. But it's a strength finder approach to communication. Well, I love it.

That's hard work that you. you do. I'm amazed that you're able to put that together, Emerson. So, but you, so, so, so you were saying, though, that the book is aimed principally at people that are maybe timid about speaking their mind. So they err on the side of not saying anything. Correct. Well, that's one group, one of the three, those who hold back, which would be that group, those who are too blunt, and those who are average in the communication, but want to improve it. And that third is a little bit the different than the first two, but they just want to be better as a communicator. They do a pretty good job of it.

You know, they don't always hold back and they're not always too blunt, but they just want to really become effective like an Eric metaxus. Oh, yeah. So it's kind of funny to me because I think that earlier in my life, I was more upset about people who were too blunt. Now I'm more upset at people who aren't blunt enough. In other words, I think that I saw examples everywhere you look. And I don't know if this is just a function of age,

but you're rubbed the wrong way by people that are harsh or they're kind of embarrassing to the people who agree with them. In other words, if you see, you know, I remember, I think I wrote about this in my first book, everything I just wanted to know about God, but we're afraid to ask, that there was a guy on Park Avenue, you know, standing in the middle of Park Avenue down in the like, It must have been in the 40s, so, you know, near Midtown. And he was like a prophet, you know, like a maniac with a beard and just looking wild. And he was ostensibly, you know, preaching the Bible. But he was clearly unhinged and nasty.

And then I thought to myself, this guy is driving more people away from God every day. It's almost unbelievable because of the whole context. Why he, you know, what is he saying, how he's coming across? who are the people walking by? Is he having any effect on anybody? Is there anybody that goes, you know what? Hearing that guy, that set me straight. I would bet no that there was nobody.

And so you kind of get examples like that in the culture and you see them out there. And that's, that bothered me more than anything. Today, it's the opposite in the sense that I think that there are people out there in the culture saying tough things. But those tough things need to be said. we have to help people in a sense be more courageous. We don't want to be like the wild-eyed pseudo-profit on Park Avenue. But to me, it's just interesting how you can go wrong in both directions. And that's what you write about in the book.

Well, that's right. We can be right, but wrong at the top of our voice. And so one of the challenges for us is to, but then some of us to encounter, and then we don't say anything. and it's important to understand that truth will carry its own weight. Truth will carry its own weight. So it's incumbent upon me and you're good at this, great at this. What am I trying to say here?

And am I willing to do a little preparation before I present something or say something? Many situations where we're concerned about speaking something, there is time to think this through. And what is the truth here? And if I deliver this, how am I going to come across? Am I going to come across with this hostile contemptuous emotion? and it's that whole issue of the golden rule. How would I want somebody to speak to me? And yet, interesting, the secular culture reserves the right to lie to me,

but they don't want me to lie to them. And that's where this duplicity is, and this is where the lack of civility is emerged. But I think overall, if you want to be a Christ follower, Jesus said, you've got to give an account for every careless word. I mean, when I first came across that, I thought, Lord, I'm in trouble here. And so it's big trouble.

Yeah. Big trouble. We need to take that very sacredly. This is a very sacred statement and that just because I can get away with it on social media, it doesn't mean that the Lord's heart is not grieved and that he's going to circle back to this moment. We'll be right back talking to Emerson Egrich. The book is Speak Your Mind. Hey there, folks.

Welcome back. This is Hour 2. I want to ask you a question. Are you rethinking your child's educational path? Are you wondering if their current school truly supports your family's values? Well, if you're thinking about this, you're not exactly alone. The Herzog Foundation is here to help. With the Trump administration working to abolish the Federal Department of Education,

hurrah, and return control to the states, there's never been a better time to explore Christian education. For too long, federal overreach has dictated how children learn. But now, parents have a greater say in their kids' futures. This shift could make Christian education more attainable. than ever. So the Herzog Foundation, these are our friends, there are our trusted guide in navigating these changes. So whether your family is considering a Christian school, a hybrid model, homeschooling, Herzog Foundation provides the resources. Families need to make informed decisions to stay updated on

the latest developments from the Trump administration and how these developments impact education. Please go to the Lion. That's Herzog Foundation's award-winning publication. You can find it at readlion.com, R-E-A-D-L-L-I-O-O.com. dot com. So that's their publication. Readlion.com is the website. And you can sign up for their daily, weekly newsletters. It's important stuff. We have to take back education from the Marxist lunatics in our federal government.

We have taken our eye off the ball for like what, 50 years. This is very, very important. So the Herzog Foundation, you can find them at herdsogfoundation.com. Herzog Foundation.com. These are our friends, folks. These are our friends. They're doing great work. Hurtzog Foundation.com.

I want to mention our campaign with Christian Solidarity International. This is a big deal. I've been sharing about it on the program. We have an opportunity. If you're listening to me on this program, every one of us has an opportunity to be modern-day abolitionists, to not just to add actually it's more than being a modern day abolitionist um abolitionists advocate against slavery we have the opportunity actually to free slaves and we've done this every year with

CSI they have connections in Sudan and this is one of these amazing things I've never been to Africa, much less to Sudan. The things that go on in the world, horrible, horrible things. We know that in the 90s, many, many Christians were enslaved by radical Muslims. And when the UN got involved and ended that war, they did not free those who had already been enslaved. So we get to do that because of CSI, because they're already there. And this is what they do. and we've talked about it on the program. They trade cattle vaccines with these Falani tribesmen. They do all kinds of things to free these slaves

and then to bring them, to walk them to a new territory into a life of freedom, and then they set them up in a life of freedom. We've talked about it with Kevin McCullough on the program and with Todd Chapman. And the only thing that remains is for you, to help us. So in order to do that, you go to metaxis talk.com. The website, it's actually our radio website, metaxis talk.com. The top of the page, you will see a banner. You click on the

banner. And once you click on the banner, you see all the different options and the details. There's all kinds of details, things I'm not sharing here. But there are a number of ways to give. I say, just to be clear, every $250 that anyone gives. So you can give a fraction of that. whatever, but every $250 freeze a slave and sets that person up in a life of freedom, it's a big deal. So some people can give monthly. Maybe that's easier. But we'd love you to do that.

It's amazing to me that we can do this. And I invite everybody to get involved, to be a part of this great thing. So metaxistocococcom is the website, 888-25. 353, 3522, 888, 253, 3522. Please go to Metaxistalkis Talk.com. Click on the banner at the top of the page. Please join us in this.