The Exorcist Files - Fr. Carlos Martins on Relics, Holy Curses, and How God Actually Speaks

Episode Date: July 23, 2026

Fr. Carlos Martins opens the mailbag. In one sitting he takes on venerating relics, praying holy curses, biblically laying off people who feel like family, staying hopeful while single at 40, and how to tell God's voice from your own. Blunt, funny, and unsparing, the exorcist without a script.Thanks to our SponsorsGet 25% Off Cowboy Colostrum with code EXFILES at https://www.cowboycolostrum.com/EXFILES.Go to wildalaskan.com/EXFILES for $35 off your first order of premium, wild-caught seafood.Live Better Longer with BUBS Naturals. For A limited time get 20% Off your entire order with code EXFILES20 at Bubsnaturals.comHead to Exodus90.com/exfiles and start your 14 day free trial. Seek the Lord...see what happens!Timestamps::00 | Cold open, “ask any demon”0:24 | Welcome to the Q&A1:08 | Closest calls in the exorcism room2:30 | Relic cards down the sleeves4:33 | Alessandro: murderer turned saint5:07 | Father’s perfect Sabbath6:18 | A Protestant’s honest question about relics8:52 | What a demon reveals about a relic10:24 | The object itself is holy11:21 | St. Anthony’s incorrupt tongue12:12 | Laying off people who feel like family14:44 | Holy curses vs. praying for enemies18:47 | The clinic that never turned a profit20:30 | “I’m 40 and single”24:15 | The three ugliest qualities25:34 | Does God grant the desire or remove it?28:53 | Inside Catholic premarital prep34:23 | “I heard the Lord say”36:50 | The echo test41:06 | How to deliver a hard word50:34 | What makes a great exorcist53:50 | No fear of the Prince of Darkness54:55 | Reconciliation after a friendship ends1:03:04 | Close: “stay demon free”See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

When a demon voices his displeasure against a relic, he never talks to the relic as if it's a thing, to the serenelli card. It's like, I hate you. Ask any demon and he will tell you. And if you won't tell you, they'll at least react to them. Oh, you shouldn't ask demons, though, right? Just to be clear. Right. So that was a figure of speed. Yes, so you've been learning. Welcome back to The Exorcist Files, of which the show will remove any ability to have denial about the spiritual realm. How is that one, Father? That's pretty good.

Off the cuff, do it we can. You ready for some Q&A? Let's do it. We love our listeners. We're so grateful for all supporting the show. We get thousands of emails and so many great questions. We try to select ones that are our topics that we can provide the most value to and hopefully help the most people.

But so anyways, thank you so much. Please continue to write in. You never know when it will be your day, right? You know not the hour. Your question might be asked. You bet. Okay, Father, why don't we start with an easy, uplifting question. You've shared about your skull fracture in the exorcism room. Are there any other

closest calls you've had or moments where you felt your physical safety was in actual jeopardy? And perhaps this could be used as a reminder that what you do is not just in the realm of spiritual, but it also presents physical risk as well. Oh gosh. I mean, you're you're being hit pretty regularly. You'll take a fist in the face. You'll you'll you know, a punch. You'll, you know, punch or like, you know, your arm or your hand will be grabbed and pinched. Had my foot stomped hard, really hard, like way harder than what you would anticipate somebody seated to be able to do. Is that because you're really close to them? And like, you have to be close to them. Like you, you know, because, you know, you're laying hands on shoulders and on the head. So that gesture,

that, that Christian gesture, I hold great importance too. Like that, the laying on of hands is is really important to me. It's my style. I mean, certainly, I'm not the only one who does it, but not everyone does, but I like to do that. That's certainly because I think in the years we've worked together, I've always had this image of the priest standing a little further away with the holders holding someone down and them reading the book and praying. And so you're right up there. You're in the real. I'm right up there. I like to be behind the person typically. It depends on the situation, but by and large, behind. Why behind? behind because they can hear me, not see me, not that that stops anything, but that

particular dynamic allows me to kind of come close to their ears and say prayers, pray in tongues, give a command in some kind of way, but I can also, I can also monitor them from behind. So keep in mind, like one of my favorite things to do is to put relic cards of Alessandro Seronelli down the back of their shirt and inside each sleeve. I like them to wear long sleeves for that reason. So I ask for that every time that they come to the session wearing a long sleeve shirt or sweater or that or what have you. But it allows me access kind of uncliffe to the back. So I can put my hand, I can take a relic and apply the relic to the back. It's just much easier than any other being in any other place.

right than facing them head on like it's really easy for the demon to defend his face but but much tougher from behind wow there's just there's just the back offers a tremendous amount of real estate and it's very very sensitive that for so keep in mind like you know what i said is that when a demon inhabits he seems to almost always come from the spine forward like almost like he steps into the person from behind. So that area is always sensitive. The spine, the temples are sensitive, the shoulders, the neck is. So that real estate there is really vulnerable. And I really don't have an explanation as to why it is, but a tremendous amount of just empirical experience of it being so. So it's a great place to apply relics.

Wow. I'm trying not to make as many jokes, but it does seem like Alessandro Sernelli is truly your ace up the sleeve, right? He is. He's very active. The demons particularly hate him. It's just another confirmation. It's a preternatural confirmation, which is not unimportant that he lived a really holy life. And everyone who knew him after that, knew that that's what he was. He was holy. He was a murderer turned into a saint, really. Wow. All right. Well, be careful, it sounds like, and make sure your insurance is current, right? In that, and the exorcism room. Yeah, I would love to get the actuary form that you fill out, Father, about any risk factors you might have. Father, we know Sabbath is very important and resting is very important. What is your perfect Sabbath, or perhaps you could describe the perfect Saturday, if that's your day off? What would be Father's ideal Sabbath?

So for me, not being a parish priest, I take Sunday because it's available to me. Because my ministry is not parish ministry, Sunday isn't a workday like it is for a typical priest. I mean, unless I'm sobbing for somebody. Perfect Sunday, I get up, I pray, make coffee, then pray. I call friends. I usually, I like to take time out to have a cigar. either in the backyard or on the roof. So we have a nice terrace on the roof. I call friends, call my family, usually get together with somebody,

usually a friend or another priest for a bite for supper. Do a little bit of reading and call it a day. Okay. Sounds great. Hopefully I'm invited the next time I'm in town for your Sabbath. You bet you. All right. Well, you mentioned relics earlier. So, Father, this comes in.

Protestant fan of the show. I really love the idea of Father of Relics, but I have to admit, it does feel cringy to me to see people grasping and desperately trying to touch an object like a bone of someone they don't even know or can't prove is real. Also, it feels like it could be a rife opportunity

for scams in trading with these relics. And yet, I see it clearly in Scripture. Can I ask, where does veneration of relics in Catholicism border on idolatrous healing. And are there any more stories that you could share to help me have more faith in the object's value? Yeah. So let's start with the end first, the latter part of that inquiry. So read the church fathers on relics. So do do if nothing else an internet search on the church fathers on relics and just see what they say. There's a wealth of

information there. And, you know, it is not a modern practice. It's an ancient practice. It doesn't have a modern genesis. It has an ancient one. You know, look, is there a possibility that this kind of devotional practice could be misused? Yes, but any devotional practice can be misused. Any at all. So that shouldn't stop us, right? A car can be used for wonderful things. It can be used for bad things, a gun the same, anything, even a freezer. So that shouldn't stop us. The saints are incarnate in Christ. They become members, limbs, body parts, if you will, on the body of Christ. They become they become literal parts of his mystical body. So as parts of his body, they share his spirit. So the power, if you will, the spirit, if you will, that is present in a relic is none

another than the Holy Spirit. There's a connection with the Holy Spirit. And he's the agent of anything miraculous and of anything good. However, the soul of the saint remains connected to the relics. The identity of the saint remains connected to the relics. Yes, there is a separation of the body and the soul, but the identity of the saint is present in all of his or her relics. So, and look, ask any demon and he will tell you. And if you won't tell you, they'll at least react to that. Well, you shouldn't ask demons, though, right? Just to be clear. Right. So that was a figure of speed. Yes. So you've been, you've been learning and internalizing. I got Miyagied right there. So, but you see it in their behavior that you see. And, you know, like I've said time and time again on the

podcast. When a demon voices his displeasure against a relic, he never talks to the relic as if it's a thing, or it never talks about it as if it's a thing. He talks about it as the person of whom that relic is a part of. So to the Seronelli card, it's like, I hate you. So there's every indication that the saint himself or herself is present. And so that's a, you know, it's the demons giving us that window into the dynamic that's going on. So we're being given a clue.

So it's worth it to stop and listen and observe that because there's something, you know, in the many years I've been doing this kind of work, it's never veered off of that. They refer to the relic. not as a thing, but they refer to the person of whom that is a relic of. That's so interesting to think through these objects as conduits, right? Because that's the theology, right?

It's not the object in of itself. It's that the object is somehow a conduit for the presence of that saint and the Holy Spirit's power, right? Not quite. Not so far. The object itself is holy and very holy, because there is that connection. So the identity of the saints, it isn't because the relic is a sign of something else. It is that, but it's not only that. The relic itself forms part of the identity of that redeemed human being. And that relic itself, I mean, we're talking about first-class relics, the literal body parts,

they are going to be resurrected one day. So the fact that they are effective now is a precursor to that redeemed state. It's a kind of sign, it's a foreshadowing of that magnificent state in which that body is going to be in terms of its glorification in heaven. I know it's a subjective answer, but I remember I was in Padua and I believe it was the vocal box or the jaw or throat of St. Anthony. Both. Yeah, which was very strange. And are there any stranger relics that you've heard of? And hang on.

So why did they put that in particular on display? I'm assuming because it must have been a gifted speaker or preacher, right? But what is unique about those? What's unique about his voice box and in particular his tongue? I'm unsure. So please, enlighten. So his body decomposed except those parts. And he was a noted preacher.

So it was kind of fitting. It was God is drawing. a sign out of his remains pointing to the fact of how he was gifted. So his tongue remains incorrupt and same with his voice box. Okay. There is an unseen war unfolding all around us. And it's not just happening around us, but inside our guts. In fact, there's a big party happening in our digestive tracks.

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premium wild-caught seafood. That's wild-alaskin.com slash X-Files for $35 off your first order. All righty. Next question. Oh, tough one here. Father, I run a company with dozens of employees. The market is getting really tough in our sector. I'm probably going to have to let some people go soon,

and they are like family to me. I'm absolutely dreading this. How can I biblically do this well in a way that's honoring God and their dignity? It's not all dollars and cents, but there is a reality of what we're facing right now. And I know I have to make this call. Yeah, sure. So a really tough situation,

but a fact of life at times and certainly a fact of business. And, you know, if you don't make drastic decisions sometimes, then you can't save the business and everybody loses. So certainly you want to minimize the evil that life's circumstances is throwing at you, the badness that is being thrown at you. Certainly, I mean, you want to do everything legally. So, and of course, this questioner, there's so much sensitivity already in the question. So there's no doubt of it. But we all want to obey the laws, right?

So we don't want to cheat anybody. Also, you want to do it in a way that's fair. So selecting, I don't know which ones you ought to select, but I'll tell you that you need to find a fair way to do that. So what are the principles? I think you want to preserve your company. If there's somebody that you think will have an extraordinarily difficult time finding another job, much harder than others, you might take that into account. You want to do it in a way that affirms the heck out of people. You said that they were family and let them feel that in this action.

And you want to assure them, I think, that if times change, that you would welcome them back gladly. It sounds like you have a good team, a team that you love and appreciate. So if you're calling them family, I mean, that says a lot right there. I think you want to allow them to understand the difficulty that you face so that they, to can understand that this is not a personal thing. It is a rational thing that just has to be done. So it's not their fault and it's not your fault. It's just the circumstances that are being dealt. I think if you do all of those things, people understand. And God always provides it for people. So you just, you have to do what you have to do and then turn loose a bit.

Well, hopefully on an unrelated note, we had a question come in from a listener who discusses how David prayed Psalms and I think a big called deprecatory prayers against his enemies and said of course we're not supposed to curse people but there is such a thing he talked about as holy curses so Father what is the line and

the thinking from praying for your enemies as Jesus taught but also praying for the demise of evil and darkness as well yeah I think the way you do that is easy you just direct those prayers to God

and say it in exactly those words. So, Lord, bring down what is evil. Lord, intervene, minimize evil, cut its legs out from underneath it, render it null and void, protect good people for it. So address it always to Christ. And I think in doing that way,

Christ is the filter. He's the recipient to the prayer. And you are avoiding blowback that may cut. Like, don't, in other words, don't be a maverick. don't be a showboater that you think you're your that God somehow needs you to go out and start cursing evil left and right because what's going to happen is you're going to you're going to experience blowback evil's going to come at you because it's not going to appreciate that

but you can curtail all that and avoid all of that by just saying lord i ask you for you to do this and i think that is just as effective and and i think it is the far more prudent way for the average Joe, if you will, to go about having an effect in the world. The difference is, if we're talking about individual family members or your property or that kind of, yeah, I'm going to go ahead and address evil directly. Like, I don't want you here. You have no right to be here. I command you to leave. So there you have a legitimate authority. You have much more authority there than you have at over the pornographic shop, say, a few blocks from your home. And you want to curse that thing out every time you go by. And I certainly, I do my own kind of holy curse. Like I utter the same

thing. May you be struck invisible. May the curse of Almighty God be upon you. May you wither and die as the cursed fig tree and all those like you. See, I hear that and I try to reconcile that. What Jesus is, you know, I tell you, you know, pray for your enemies. Pray for those who persecute you. So I just did. I just did. So, so I'm, look, so my, my enemies are human beings who are doing evil things. Right. Okay. And those enemies, there's the possibility of change. But when my enemies are demons, Satan in his army, there's no possibility for them to be redeemed. So Christ isn't asking us to pray for them. Right. The prayer is not going to do anything. So I am coming against them. I am, right? I am. This is something, I'm not prescribing this prayer for others, but I, I undertake this. So I'm not cursing out the humans that are there working. I want them redeemed. I want them saved. I want them saved. But I'm specifically going after the preternatural

elements that are there. Sure. Yeah, because I think this, actually, this is a great segue into another question on reconciliation because I think it's really interesting. One, it sounds like, Father, the posture of the heart is really important because, you know, it sounds like we should always pray for God's will be done and God does not want evil to flourish. And so when you see something like it seems like you could go both ways. You could say, shut this business down, but you could also say, Lord, whoever is running this business, would they come to know you and be convicted, right? And so it's just two sides of the same coin. Maybe is that a way to look at it? Yeah.

Although your way sounds a lot more epic. And I've been with you when we've been rolling through LA and you've been wholly cursing everything, it's tough. I'm scared to take you to certain towns. It just, you're non-style. You had a rotator cuffishy. Yeah. But, but, you know, I, I, when I was living in Texas for, for in between myself and my home, I had to drive on the freeway. And there were two strip clubs in between.

and in the 18 months that I was living at this particular residence and having to take this particular path, both of them closed. So, you know, I prayed and in between in that path as well was the largest abortion clinic in North America. And I, every single time I went past that, I put a holy curse on it. And, you know, we came to find out years later that the place has never been profitable, never been profitable. And, you know, good on the blessing, good on the holy curse. I don't know that that had anything directly to do with it, but it certainly didn't help them. I know that for sure. If people want to do something, they could, if they want to specifically acknowledge a place of evil in a place of evil, in a purpose.

prayer as they're driving past it, let's say, then direct that prayer to God. You know, Lord God, may your triumph exist here and nothing else. That's a great prayer. Or phrase it in some other prayer, but allow God to be the mediator of the action. So it becomes petitionary. And so, and that way, you're, you're protected from blowback that you may not be expecting and might come at you pretty good. Okay. Father Martins, love the show. Sometimes I even love Ryan.

Father, I'm feeling hopeless right now. I just turned 40. I'm single. I have no prospect of a husband. I've been a faithful Christian woman my whole life. I so badly want to be married and have a family. But I do feel this dream is fading fast. I thought God doesn't give strong desires only to leave the one fulfilled like this.

I'm praying for acceptance of it, but do you have any advice? I want to stay hopeful. That's tough. Yeah. It is tough. And common. Tough and common. So what I would say is to that individual, you know, have you done your business with God?

Have you taken this tool? And then do you stop and listen? What does he say to you about? Does he tell you to keep hanging on? Or does he give you a different instruction? Like, hey, you know, I want to throw someone at you, but you stay locked up in the house seven days a week. You're not meeting anybody new. I knew somebody like this who I've known both males and females, and both of them had the same symptom. She is looking for a husband,

but does nothing but go to work and come home. She'll go shopping, but there's no effort to meet anyone. Well, her idea was that somebody is just literally going to come to the house and sweep her off her feet. This is just unrealistic. At least FedEx, Amazon. on maybe the newspaper. Yeah. So it just, it's unreasonable. It's unreasonable.

So, so you, you need to meet people, right? Today, lots of people use dating sites and you might try that. Now,

is there, you know, aside from the spiritual thing of doing your business with the Lord, like complaining to the Lord about this, and there's nothing wrong with that. I mean,

that's a whole biblical genre, right? The lamentation is nothing more than a complaint. and lamentation occurs all over scripture. So there's nothing in principle wrong with that. But you also at a certain point, when you've done the lamentation, shut up and listen.

Is the Lord saying something to you? What does he say? How have you appropriated it? So is he putting somebody on your mind that you think, oh, no, I, you know what? No, I'll do anything but that one. If that's what God wants, it's going to make you happy for your blessing. not for your demise. What are you doing then just at a prudential at a human level?

What are you doing about maybe your looks, your character? Are you improving yourself? Are there ways in which you can improve? Make yourself more marketable, more appealing to a man or to a woman, what have you? What are the ways in which you conduct a human relationship? Is it pleasant? Do people generally find you pleasant? And if not, what are ways? in which you can work on your character. Where are ways in which you can work on that? I knew somebody who lamented the fact that she was single. She was the crabbiest human being I've ever met in my whole life.

I mean, it was so energy draining to be around her. Even when you did a favor, she, gosh, she had just this powerfully repulsive way to make you feel like that you owed her this, that it was a privilege for you to do this thing for her because she's so deserting of it. So who wants to spend the rest of one's life with a person like that? So you need to take, you need a sobriety about yourself.

Get and ask people, Look, I want you to pick the three ugliest qualities about me and feed them back to me. And do this a few times and you'll begin to see patterns. But give people permission. Don't justify what and who you are. Give them permission to be very direct. And then you have to honestly face those qualities that are being identified. And it's not pleasant to hear that, but it's useful.

And it can be constructive. Well, that brings me my next question. Father, what are three? But this is something. I'm curious, Father, has ever been something in your life that was a deep longing that you were convinced what's going to happen, et cetera? And God just either took it away or made it clear, hey, this is something you're just going to have to deal with. The Toronto Maple Leafs winning the Stanley Cop has not happened in my lifetime. The last time they wanted is 1967.

I was born in 1974. It's been a very long drought. So how do you say hopeful? in the midst of this. I stopped watching their games. On the Exorcist Files, we spend a lot of time talking about how to take care of the soul. And that's very, very important. But as I get a little older, too, I'm realizing it's also very important to take care of the body that God gave us.

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that you still have. And you will join a great community and form bonds and ties with other men that are pursuing the same things as you. Well, Father, you know, we were talking a little bit before this on narratives in Christian dating and romance that might be helpful or harmful. One of the things I'm curious to get your reaction on is on this topic is there seems to be a, maybe it's oversimplified, but there seems to be a narrative that, hey, one of two things will happen. God will give you the desire of your heart or he'll just take it away. And in my experience, that has not really been the case. Now, I do believe he can do that.

I do believe, in fact, I'm reading a biography right now, and it was really beautiful, a World War II story about a woman who was really want to get married, and then the guy ended up marrying someone else, and she prayed for God to give her a supernatural grace to love him as he loves her. And she said it just, she had a love that suddenly was more, more powerful, almost like nuclear than the love she had for him as a potential spouse. And now, so she found herself praising and blessing for the way that that person he had married actually was fulfilling his calling. And so that's a beautiful illustration. However, I think that

is not the normative experience. I mean, there's genuine, you know, I think there's people who are content in singleness, but also what's still like to be married and they're still wrestling with that. So I'm curious, you know, are there any, what do you think about a narrative that God either takes it away or grants it. Is that an oversimplification? I think it's a gross oversimplification. I think, you know, the fact that two people, A, are able to find one another, and B, are able to make a life with one together, with one another, to live together, those are both miraculous things. Those are both great gifts. Like, marriage is tough. It's tough. And the, The whole, you know, the way we talk about it, the way that, you know, Hollywood projects it, the romance stuff, it just did, in my experience, there's very little of that in a marriage, relatively speaking, and a whole lot of mutual sacrifice and putting up with things and, and, you know, cultivating a crop that you're waiting for it to bear fruit.

Sometimes it takes a lot of years. Sometimes it doesn't really happen or maybe you come, you know, you get 60% of what you want and you kind of just have to live with that. You know, welcome the life on earth in a post-fallen world. Or working with me, right? Some could say that, yeah. You're not that bad, right? Well, thank you. But there are a lot of groups today, a lot of authors, a lot of podcasts out there talking about how to find the perfect man or how to find the perfect woman from a Christian perspective.

many of them I just find they're unreasonable. You know, like that you, you know, they're, they're talking to women and saying, look, look, here's what you need to look for in a man. And if he has any negative qualities at all, you need to dispel him. And the same for the opposite is true, like with regard to women. And I don't know that life really works like that. I mean, obviously your goal shouldn't be to go forward. find a loser. But to find somebody with no imperfections at all, good luck to you. Well, that's actually, and this is something that we'll touch on, a little teaser, in the future

cases. But Father, when you were doing ministry early on, were you involved in pre-marital counseling or help that as the church? I'm curious, in the Catholic Church, if someone wants to get married at a parish, I've heard it's actually very involved with the whole, like the priests get involved and the parents get involved. It's not just a private thing and then you sign up for a few cursory sessions, right? Correct. Yeah. So I did marry people, absolutely, and you meet with them. And they usually have to give six months notice. There's a preparation course that they have to take. And of course, and you meet with them. You meet with them as a couple and you also meet with them privately. And because there's a very formal structure that is filled out. So they're, they're, they need to

give testimonies, they need to be, they're literally interrogated about certain parts. Were you involved in this interrogation? Oh, sure. Yeah. So you need to, let's just be honest and put things on a table. You need to ask each of the partners, as far as you know, are you capable of performing the marital act? Because you're, you, you're going to enter into a relationship now where it is, it is a right that your spouse is going to expect this from you. Is there any reason why you doubt that you're going to be able to do that. Guess what? Now, it never happened to me, but guess what?

It sometimes happens where so a friend of mine, the female had a tumor in her vaginal canal. And he said, yeah, but no worries. You know, I'm fine with it. You know, so we won't be able to have sex for a while, but she's going to deal with it down the road at a certain point. And there can't be a marriage at this point because there isn't the possibility. of a total self-giving.

So have the surgery, whenever it is you want it, then come and ask for marriage from the church. So until that can happen. Have you ever, is any part of that course, or is there any sort of screening? I'm curious, is our in-house exorcist? Have you ever met with a couple and you thought that one or both of them

were spiritually compromised and as a result said, hey, don't do this? Yeah, sure. Like it's your duty to inform a spouse. Look, look, I see grave problems here. In fact, I won't perform the marriage. So I'll say, look, given these conditions here that there is not a recipe here for any reasonable hope that this is going to be a successful marriage. And I'm not going to go through this if I think, you know, a divorce is inevitable.

So I'm just not going to participate in that. It's a waste of your time. It's a waste of mine. So, you know, but I will prescribe. things. And so that's what this meeting, these kinds of meetings are all about. It's to bring problems onto the table and discuss them in a safe way. Because we want people to succeed. We want to set them up for success. We don't want to set them up for failure. And so we, but we want everybody to be aware of issues and for there to be a sober discussion of them and a mutual

collaboration as to a plan as, you know, how can we overcome this? You know, what should we do? And so, so we're not, you know, I'm never against anybody. I want to help them if they're helpable. Yeah. You know, Father, for anyone out there who is struggling with a longing unfulfilled and is struggling to maintain help, I know that's one of the toughest things is when you're just, you know, because the Christian is called to contend, we have multiple verses on keep praying, keep interceding, keep going after it, right? On the other hand, we saw from the professor, of our faith, that he eventually said, not my will, but, right, thy will be done. And so, what's the advice you would give to anyone right now who's in a season of contending for something?

And there doesn't seem to be any signs that it's working. Right. So what I would say is dedicate a specific time every day to that in prayer. So keep imploring the Lord. Keep speaking into his ear about that. Secondly, look for ways in which you can make this at a human level happen. So maybe ask a girlfriend to help you. Hey, I want to market myself. I want to meet new people. Can you help me figure out, if it's not natural for you, ask your girlfriend.

Can you help me figure out how to best do this? Or ask a married couple if there's a couple that you trust. Sometimes the dynamic between, like, you know, in doing such a thing, you're being very vulnerable. And sometimes it's difficult to be vulnerable like that in front of a member of the opposite sex, even if you're friends with that person. But regardless, get someone to help you and take those notions to heart. You know, look for people. Go on internet dating sites and see who you find and keep pursuing. You know, don't look for Mr. Wonderful, or don't expect Mr.

Wonderful on day one, but pursue it and cultivate it. And that is also very biblical. It's very biblical to be looking for a spouse and to go through hardship in doing that and go through a period of waiting and seasons of of drought where that doesn't happen. And then the Lord brings it about. All right. Father, you've said on numerous occasions and numerous episodes, I heard the Lord say, I'm curious, how does the Lord speak to you? And when you say that, what do you mean exactly? Yeah, really good question. So, um, In my life, in great and important moments, my conversion from atheism, my call to the priesthood, and just at other moments, I heard God's voice very clearly. So it isn't a literal, audible sound, but it's kind of an internal speaking with very discrete words.

So I can quote what I heard, word for word. So in other words, there is a content, there's a knowledge that is implanted. And it's usually never whole paragraphs. It's a sentence or two sentences, that kind of thing. But in those moments, it's unforgettable. So he's capable of doing that. Then there's another realm of it where, okay, it's not as loud. It's not as permanent, but it is very relevant and important.

So first of all, I'm seeking a word from the Lord. I'm seeking. I may be praying for someone. I may be asking to make some kind of sense out of this situation. In one of the podcast episodes, I did this in the house infestation case. So I spoke to the lady of the house who was the one who called me in. And then I went into the chaplain and started to pray. And I was asking the Lord, imploring the Lord, for something that would make me understand

this situation better, more acutely. And at the same time, what's the best way, most efficient way for me to tackle this? Well, what I heard was, I just kept seeing internally the word imitation, imitation. And when I receive a word like that, the first thing I do is I kind of dispel it and clear the mind again. And if it comes back, I do that two or three more times. But if the same word keeps coming back, look, then this is likely the Lord's speaking. So I'm going to nail on that.

I'm going to grab hold of that. So you start with the premise that, hey, it's monkey brain. It could just be something that popped in there. And if it's from the Lord, it'll come back. I do. So if it's of the Lord, it is going to come back. There's a persistence to it because God doesn't just speak once. he keeps speaking.

His word has an echo. So that's what I do. And it's worked very well for me. So I give the Lord the freedom to speak in the way that he wants, but then I latch onto it. Once I have every reason to believe that this is his word, and sometimes it is so clear, you just have no doubt. I've had experiences like there's just,

no doubt whatsoever. Yeah, it's interesting because, you know, so like in Protestant circles, you know, they're always taught, hey, like, you know, you get a word and it may not be from God, but, you know, you got to test it against Scripture. In fact, I had a pastor who would always say there's two guardrails to this, right? Like, reality, which I was appreciated, right? Like, the Lord told me I'm going to be a PGA professional. It's like, maybe, but we've seen the reality of your game, right?

Since scripture doesn't explicitly talk about Ryan's golf game. And in the other hand, God does not tell you to do things that violate, like his, his law and his command. So I'm curious, in the situation like this, imitation, are there things we say, okay, in the context of what I'm doing, I trust my discernment enough, et cetera, I'm kind of at the place in my faith that I can do this. You know, for those who are, you know, praying about certain things that can be tricky, right? Like, for example, we talked about relationships. I have seen charismatic, prophetic words really well-intentioned, but go way out the, the number of people I've heard. There was an individual that I remember very popular who,

multiple people heard from the Lord was their spouse. And these were wonderful, spirit-filled, like, genuinely seeking. But I think it really affected me. It got me thinking it just reminded me of the, there's no limit to the human mind's ability to deceive itself. So I'm curious, what guardrails do you put up for situations when you're praying about stuff like that? So certainly, look, if you're not in what Catholics call the state of grace,

right? So if you're not in communion with Christ, you've got serious sense. on your soul that is unconfessed. So you should not be giving words to anybody without doing your business with the Lord first because guess what? You don't belong in God's kingdom right now. You don't belong to him. You may have faith, but guarantee the devil has more faith in you. So your willpower alone in that state is not going to avail you because the Holy Spirit is not inside you. You've evicted him through your choices, period. So on the supposition that you are in communion with the Lord,

then what's your track record for listening? And again, deception is easy, easy, easy. And you might wish to be a great prophetic voice and have this gift and be admired and be, and even if you're not so much interested in the admiration, but you're interested in seeing so much good being accomplished in the world and that. And you had a contribution in that. You're setting yourself up for great deception and causing great damage in people.

In our circles, they would say no, it's a responsible prophecy. The Lord speaks and we tested in scripture, also tested with community, talk to your pastor, all good things. But they'd also say no dates, no mates and no sensitive topics. And I thought, well, that's weird because I appreciate that. the wisdom in that of like you don't want to because that'll mess people up. But I also thought, just to your point earlier, just because something can be abused doesn't mean you shut it out. Because I do have friends. This is much more rare. But I have a very good friend, for example, that had a word for someone about a specific date about something that was going to happen. And it came

true. Right. And I would have thought, man, if they had followed the advice of no mates, no dates, that would never would have been visited upon them. That being said, of course, you know, we want to have wisdom in this. And so, yeah, I guess, Are there any dynamics where I word, you'd say, you know what? You have too much skin in the game. Don't bother. Any word that has the potential to scandalize, to damage, to hurt, you need to be consummately respectful. So don't force the word on anyone.

So first ask, you know, I think I may. And that's important to qualify because you don't know. Even if you think you know, even if you're convinced you know, you don't. I think I'm hearing a word from the Lord for you. I'd like to share it with you if you're open to it, but if you're not, that's okay. Receive the permission to do it. Then qualify your word. That, look, pray about this, but this is what I think I heard.

and if it resonates with you, then take it to the Lord. If you think this might be true, or there's a meaning here, wrestle with the Lord, but I felt, I felt in my heart the Lord was asking me to give this to you. And now I'm washing my hands of the issue, so does it, I mean, you want to keep talking about it with me. That's fine, I'm open to it, but I'm not going to hound you. Sure. it is. So I'm leaving this with you. And if I can be of help to you, I'm open to it. But heavens, you know, what I've seen and heard so often with people is, is someone comes in

with the word, even if it's a genuine word, they come in like a bully. And there's, frankly, a kind of a raping of the conscience of the person. So, so I'm, you know, I'm not going to be respectful to you. I'm not going to, you know, like you're, you're supposed to take this job on the other side of town and you're disobeying God if you don't. Oh, I've had people tell me that. I had someone one time tell me, oh, you know, the Lord showed me something about you, but he told me to wait until it shows it to you and then you'll catch up. And I was like, this feels so manipulative and conniving. And it's, yeah, it's like, but I thought, I love what you said, just the qualifiers. It's so, I think we'd have so much less damage in this, if we'd, if we'd,

just qualify things with, I could be wrong, right? Not thus sayeth the Lord. So, Father, for anyone right now who thinks they've been praying about something, and maybe there's a weird word, like it's like, you want me to reach out to this person? You want me to say this? Or are you asking me to do this Lord? You know, what's the, for our listeners out there, what's the next, you know, what's the best protocol to really test that word, you know, and to, you know, make sure it's.

If it has the potential to hurt or scandalize or just really disturb somebody, then, then take it to somebody you trust and say, look, I think there's a person in my life that I feel the need to give this word to, and here's what that word is. How do you think I should go about this? And take that counsel. Go to a couple people, go to a few people, or go to somebody in spiritual authority who's discernment you trust and lay this out. Go to somebody who maybe knows that person, because it can happen.

that you don't know that person well. But get some background information if you can. My gosh, because you could be dropping a piano from the sky on them and really leave them hurt. You could give them a tremendous blessing. And I've seen both. I've seen both things being caused. But because even in the past that God has spoken to you very clearly and you almost always have been right, if your word has the potential to cause scandal, to hurt, to, you know, to maim somebody,

you need to be consummately careful because you can really set them up for pain. And keeping in mind, you always need somebody's permission. Maybe they're not open to it, and you have to accept that. You have to accept that. May I share it with you? If you're open to it, I'd like to. But if not, then that's okay. I'll pray for you.

so that they feel respected, they feel appreciated. Their individuality and sovereignty is respected. Because after all, you are on their team. I mean, that should be a given. Sure. Yeah. So you need to be, in fact, on their team then. And so what would achieve that?

Well, respect, permission, gratitude, carefulness, gentleness, and all of that. And then somebody, you know, somebody has helped by you that. Yeah. That's the point. That's the end game. I remember it was several months ago. I was during my morning prayer time,

I've been asking God to put three people on my hearts, and I don't always get three and just pray for them. And if I get a word and I feel, you know, and I have the kind of relationship with, and I have the kind of relationship with most of these people that I could, you know, they wouldn't mind hearing something. and I always say, hey, you came to mine this morning and here's a verse or actually, if it was really clear, I thought I saw this. And I remember one morning, this phrase came to mind and it said, the prophetic is reconcilatory.

And I remember thinking, this has to be God because it's just such an odd phrase. It wasn't something that I was in my normal train of logic. And I thought, that's, I've always viewed the prophetic as encouraging. I've always viewed it as, you know, wisdom was like, it's reconcil. I was like, what a weird thing to think about. and and I prayed for a friend of mine who I hadn't talked to in a couple years and we had been previously very, very close, but the relationship had just kind of, over the years, just kind of fizzled and, you know, we weren't like not friends, but just, you know, it was a bummer,

you know, and you've been very close with someone and then you're not, it's just a little more awkward. And I got this word for them, just a very simple word and an image that was kind of cool. And I thought, well, you know what? And I didn't talk as a person in two years. So, and they, they would be the first to say they're not great at texting. They very rarely respond. So I was like, really, there's no risk here because if they don't respond, I'm actually not going to take it personally because this is, this is actually part and parcel of this. So I sent it to him and I got a response within five minutes and it was a voice memo and they were like, I'm in tears right now. This is the, I've been praying. It was right around New Year and it said, hey, this is the word I

picked. I had no way of knowing this. But what you said is the word that I ask God to confirm. and that's the thing that I need to do right now. And it was really cool. And it started a series of just texts and conversations and restored a lot of our friendship. And it was really cool. And I thought, wow, that's great. And it was so I remind myself, great.

Like, Lord speaks and that's super cool. Like, wow, I mean, what are the odds? It was the exact words there. Then there been other times. And I, so of course you do that. You think, I'm on a roll now. Let's go, God. What else?

And pray for someone else. Get a word. You're like, this has to be from God. send it to him like, thanks. And so, oh, okay, I guess I'm not not bad in a hundred anymore, you know. But it was really cool to see that sometimes those words can have like just the most random morning, random thing. And it ended up really a blessing of relationship.

And so I've been very, very encouraged that God speaks today. And I was like, that makes sense because that was about unity and that was about bringing people together. And that was about encouraging someone else that wasn't for profit or for self-serving or everything. So. You know, the hardest question you can ask of somebody, I think, is how do I make you feel? And to be ready to hear the honest answer.

And in this kind of situation, you, in sharing a prophetic word, you have the power to build up someone or to take them down. And even in the building them up, you know, the fact. that you've done it multiple times in the past, there can be a confidence built up within you that is a false confidence. Absolutely. You know, and so you can get a word

that can be really damaging. And you think, you know, gosh, yeah, sure. You know, it feels like all the other times, so I'm just going to let it out. My job is to not create God's word. My job is just disseminate it. But if it has the power to hurt and wound, boy, you have the power to hurt and wound.

And there is a responsibility upon you from which you cannot abnegate, you are responsible for the impact of that. You might think that you don't, which do. And so you have to, if this word is of God, test it so that you have some kind of evidence that it is. And then when you communicate it, I get qualified, qualify, I think this is of the Lord.

But pray about it. And if you want, we can pray about it together. Maybe it's nothing. but I just think in my conscience I had to deliver this to you. And that way then you've done your job. And they are free to accept or reject it. Sure. And to be clear, sometimes you get a word for someone's like,

hey, I just really feel like God wants to remind you how much he loves you. A little risk in that. But there are other ones which are, of course, can have scandal or maim someone. So that's good. Father, as we wrap up here, a couple more questions. You've mentioned in numerous episodes, there are talented experts. I'm curious, having been one now, what do you think are the qualifications that make for someone to do really well in this ministry? Yeah, so the priest that I found that a really good exorcist, they have a knack.

And what do I mean by that? So, first of all, they're comfortable in that fight. They're not arrogant, but they're also not timid. They're comfortable with it. Okay, this, you know, would I rather be doing something else? Yep. But I'm being called to this, so I'm ready for the fight. I'm, you know, for the sake of this human being who needs my help.

They are very comfortable living in the world of sign and symbol. So there are manifestations, but the manifestations typically also point to something else. And so you're looking for patterns. Like all science is the study of patterns. You're studying repetition and then we develop knowledge out of that repetition. So you're kind of forming a little bit of a science of the interpretation of science, the interpretation of manifestations. There are clues in that.

So if you're not good at detail, if you don't have an attention to detail, well, you're probably going to be less effective than those who have an attention to detail. If you're able to interpret things metaphorically, I like that. That's an asset, right? That's an asset. I had a great friend of my father, John Hogan. God rest his soul. He died a few years ago. One of my best friends. It was a mentor to me in so many ways, just a font of wisdom. And he was a person who I would take scenarios to. He was not an exorcist, but just a really, really gifted thinker. And I would pose scenarios to him, say in action. And he would, without fail, come up with a exorcist. And he would, without fail, come up with a thinker. And he would. so like just a woven tapestry of an approach to this kind of situation. And he would identify things that would point to a deeper and inner meaning in that situation. He said, start asking these types of questions. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, in the situation.

Go after the demon in this way. It was, he was just brilliant. Like he could he could just live in that world of sign and symbol. and just derive information out of situate and paint you a picture and allow you to see patterns that once you had spoken to him, you had lenses that you could put on out and see reality in a different way. So it's not just, I mean, obviously, holiness, humility, I guess humility would go with holiness, all important things, but there are actual skill sets.

And it seems too, like, you know, we had dinner with a friend the other night and he said he's been a part of a lot of spiritual warfare and exorcisms. And he's like, I really, and I don't know if you'd say you would. enjoy it, but he's like, I don't want to be there and I'm naturally very cautious and afraid. And it sounds like you've, you know, you've shared many times in the show that you have, God's giving you sort of a charism to be like just present and you don't generally have too much fear at this point when you go. I don't.

But that, you know, I think that that was a gift that God gave. I mean, but I don't ever recall being afraid in any situation with a demon. And I'm glad for that. I think I've been able to be more effective because of that. I do remember as a child being afraid of things that people would be afraid of, like your monsters or your vampires or whatever when you believed in them as a little kid. But I just don't have any fear of the Prince of Darkness like that. I have fear of disappointing God.

I have fear of failing. I have fear of falling short of the measures. that he has for me, I have fear of not being able to be as effective as I can be to a victim. So I've, I've, I've, great concern over that. So, but, but insofar as walking in the room and interacting with an entity that absolutely despises me and curses me, I could care less. Are you speaking about the federal government or, uh, deem, I have both. All right, well, we got one last question, your father.

All right, father, I'd love some advice on some reconciliation with, the friend. I had a dear friend who recently we parted ways on a business venture. They are an amazing person, spirit-filled, spirit-led. They made a decision to end our partnership without really bringing me in and saying it was business reasons and also the spirit leading them. My own discernment said, otherwise, what do you do when two people see differently about where the spirit's leading? Things are a little awkward now, but I do miss my friend dearly. And I'm curious, what is the Christian's role in reconciliation and restoration? Yeah.

A lot of different elements there. So you can't make somebody want to be your friend or want to be your business partner and expect things to always work out perfectly. There's going to be disagreements. I think in terms of reconciling with people, we almost always should attempt to do that. And I say almost because sometimes there is so much hurt that sometimes reconciliation is just, an attempt at reconciliation would cause more damage. And what does reconciliation mean from your perspective? Is that mean just being at peace with

someone? Because it obviously, it doesn't mean for everybody returning to the normalcy of everything, right? Yeah. Well, it means at the very least an offer of sorrow, an offer of an, of an admission of guilt. And, and, you know, again, it's always an offer, right? I offer you an apology. It's up to you if you want to accept it or not. All right. So I think I'm bound to make the offer, other things being equal, right? If I've picked up a two by four and beat the snot out of you for 10 weeks straight, and then I want to come to you and, well, you might not appreciate having me around. So in which case, it would be a very bad thing for me to come in person or even at all and offering you my apology. But at the very least, if it's safe to do, we offer people an apology.

We extend the desire for the friendship to continue if such a thing is possible. And, you know, it's not always possible. But also, look, I think we have a misconception that friendships must last a lifetime. and not all of them do. And friendships sometimes last for a season, and the season ends. You know, think about when you're a little kid. You may have played with your next-door neighbor and you were thick as thieves. And then, you know, do you still play with that guy today?

Do you still hang out with that individual today? Most people, the answer is no. You may keep one or two, even a handful, but guaranteed you've had people in your life to whom at times you've been very close. And then you drifted apart. that's fine. That's fine. And it doesn't mean there's anything wrong with that. And I certainly experience that, being very close to certain people at a certain time, then either because of geographical distance or just a change in your person, the other person has grown in a particular

way, you kind of drift apart. And it's not that you're enemies, but you're not as close as you were before. That's okay. And as part of that, I remember I was in London at a church called H.D.B. Brompton where Alpha started, I believe, and really beautiful church. And a man came up to me and said, hey, do you mind if I pray for you afterwards? And I was going through a season where a lot of my friends had moved away and I was kind of in between communities, if you will. It was pretty lonely.

And it comes up and it was nothing about when he says, hey, I just, the Lord's really highlighting community right now. And he wants me to tell you that when you're climbing a mountain, not everyone wants to go to the same height you want to go to. and not almost to do the same hike you want to do. It was very strange, and I love hiking. And he says that you have to be a good friend. Remember that.

Like, you know, it is your job to be a good friend and uphold these relationships. But the Lord brings people in and out of your life that he views as necessary to help you get to where you need to go to accomplish your purposes. So be open to him sifting people out of your life and know that that's not a judgment on you. I'm paraphrasing, right? But it was really, he's like, but it could. just be God saying, hey, I know you love that person, but I have someone else I want you to do life with right now. And that was really a really timely word, very encouraging. And so I'm curious, you know, do you, how does that resonate the idea that, hey, God's, God's also bringing people

in and out of your life for different seasons to help you get where you need to go. Sure. Yeah. And I, I, I, there, there's a person in my life who started a business and I, you know, the business, I, I think was a, a good venture, a decent venture, but I found myself being used for counsel, advice, and physical assistance so much that I felt, you know, there was nothing pleasurable about the friendship anymore. The friendship had evolved into really a relationship where I was just helping this person, and this went on for more than a couple of years. And then eventually I just, I had to separate myself from this person because I felt like I was a cog in a machine. I just, there was nothing in the relationship where I was getting anything out of it. And in the

person then noticed and came to me and said, look, I really appreciate all the help that you've given me and I appreciate the influence that you are on this. And I said, yeah, but that's all I am. You know, in this dynamic, I'm helping you. And there was an apology for that. And I, I appreciated that, you know, for that apology. But I just felt the need to move on at that point. I think it was the best thing for me and probably the best thing for that person, too. But there wasn't, I just, I felt, frankly used and abused. So I needed to move on. So there's a time.

And I guess, yeah, so to bring it back to this question, I guess for this listener, he's wondering, you know, hey, I want to reconcile. You know, I think if Jesus's, you know, command in Matthew 5, you know, if you're bringing your gift to the altar and you remember someone has something against you, like leave the gift and go be reconcile with them. But it sounds like you're saying, that doesn't necessarily mean you have to go back to being friends with them or being restored. It just means having peace with.

them and just trust in that this might be God's will. Right. Yeah. And you may not want to be friends with them. And I don't know that there's anything wrong with that. You know, you're in a different space now and maybe you want to do something else. Again, I think it's a false notion that you have to be the same level of friends with someone throughout your entire life. I just don't think that's how human beings, you know, human relationships, human social interaction works. But we must be at peace, right? Yeah, you must be at peace. And, you know, I think all of us have experienced people eventually moving away from up.

You know, you might not like it, but okay, this is what that individual wants. But you've also done the same. I'm sure a different time. Yeah. And then, and down the road, the friendship may rekindle, but it may not. it, you know, guaranteed it will rekindle in heaven when we all get there because there will be an intimacy with everyone, you know, thanks be to God. That intimacy doesn't have to happen in every moment here on her. This doesn't. Amen. Amen. But also, Father, would you say that if they had a

scotch and a cigar, that could actually go? That helps. That helps. For sure, you'll get my intention. So, all right, I'm not fully restored you, but we can reconcile, right? We can reconcile. Yeah. Amazing. All right. Well, let's do. us all the time we have for today's Q&A. Father, thank you so much for sharing your wisdom. And we'll be back next week. So thanks for joining us, Father. You're very welcome. God bless everyone. Stay demon free.