The F Plus - 109: Your Role Is Played Out

Episode Date: August 16, 2013

As modern people, it's easy for us to find our day to day lacking in dramatic moments. Of course, it could be up to all of us to go out in the world and find our own adventure, to live the life that each of us have been briefly allotted. The thing is though, finding our own adventure sometimes means losing your internet connection, so screw it. Outside is overrated anyway. And so say the members of Chicken Smoothie, a kid-friendly furry virtual-pet trading thingamajig with a very active community of role play forum posters. This week, there's no laws about The F Plus (just a long list of rules).

Oh man, I'm so sorry. Oh, this image. Oh, for fuck's sake, that image. If I give you the wrong link again, I will kick myself out. Oh, that image has got to get off my screen. Oh, God. Yeah, so will you rest in peace? That image needs to be bigger on my screen.

I'm feeling rough, I'm feeling wrong In the time of my life Let's make some music, make some money Find some models for wives Hi there, this is the F-Plus Podcast, Terrible Things Red. My name's Lemon. And I'm Isfahan. Isfahan, how are you doing this week?

I'm doing pretty good. I had an epiphany of sorts the other day. Oh, that's great. Yeah, that's a good thing to have every once in a while. Yeah, it was at the grocery store of all places. That'll happen. Yeah, sure. So, yeah, I was heading back home. I had to stop at the grocery store because I knew I needed some shaving cream.

And they have shaving cream at the grocery store. So I went there, I got the shaving cream, my brand, Barbasol, if you're curious. I was. And so I'm standing in line

to pay for my single can of Barbasol because they don't have check out your own stuff lanes. And I noticed that the guy in front of me also had the exact same, not just Barbasol, but the exact same flavor of Barbasol.

Because, you know, there's different... And I realized just then that I'm not special. It was kind of depressing. Just because both of you buy Barbasol and use Barbasol, so that took away your feelings of self-importance? Yeah, because, you know, when I was growing up and my kindergarten teacher told me that I was special.

Right, yeah. And I'm starting to suspect now in my early adulthood that I'm not. Okay, well, great. Okay, so this is up to you. So you've got a very important moment that you're going to have to make a very very important decision and a lot's riding on it.

Now, here's what you can do. Option A, recognize that you are a human being in a planet filled with seven billion other human beings. And some have strengths and some have flaws. And you're better than some. And you're worse than others, and exist in a society with other people with intelligence and care. Okay. That's option A. Option B is you can go on a website and just make up an identity and just role play.

Ooh. I think I'll go with option B. I love playing pretend. Great. I thought you might go there. All right. So let me introduce. I love playing pretend. Great. I thought you might go there. Alright, so let me introduce you to chickensmoothie.com. It is a site where,

I don't know, I think you can adopt a Pokemon on there. I don't fucking get it at all, but that doesn't matter because they have forums, and on the forums, you can post in their forums as, like, a continuing roleplay story. Oh, cool. So that's what we're going to be

looking into. You're going to need to make a character, but don't worry. You don't need to make it three-dimensional. Readers, assemble! We were facing to pretend to

pretend In the room tonight, we have Boots Ring here. Dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, flying wolf bones. John. I used to be epic Discord fangirl in Daddy Discord. A reader. Acey Rockawaddle. Save the wolves! Something must be done! If wolves go extinct, I will not cry! I will die!

Yes, Fahan. The only place where I can feel like a normal person is in Middle Earth. And Lemon. Meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow. I am a ducky. Hey, guys! Hello.

Hi, Lemon. Do you guys... How do you feel about your own, like, lives and personalities and stuff? I hate it. Boring. Yeah. Fucking dull. Yeah. Would you like to play the role of somebody else? I would.

Yes. God yes. Terrific. Well let me introduce you to a website called chickensmoothie.com When you go to it there's some very happy furry looking graphics so you know that we're in for a really good When you go to it, there's some very happy, furry-looking graphics. So you know that we're in for a really good time.

Oh, boy. Yeah, that speaks of quality to me. So this is a place where you can post in the guise of somebody else and kind of carry through your little role, and then other people can role play with you. And the nice thing about it is that it's not creepy. Does that mean I can be a dog with anime hair and goggles like on the chicken smoothie website? It does indeed. So, Isfahan, would you start us out and tell us that you're perfect?

Okay. That shouldn't take long. I'm perfect. First of all, before this post starts, That shouldn't take long. I'm perfect. First of all, before this post starts, there is a poll. The poll is who should Boom fall in love with?

As we would imagine, Oliver is in the lead with 53%. It's kind of a shoo-in. I voted for the red hair at school. I voted for him too, or her too. No, not him or her. It's just the hair. It's just the red hair at school. I voted for him, too. Or her, too. No, not him or her. It's just the hair. Yeah, the red hair. It's just the red hair.

Alright, um... My name is J Squirrel, and did I say that I was perfect? No. I think you're going to. Pick coming soon on CS. I guess that's chicken smoothie. Sure. It's Counter-Strike.

Yeah, that's what I was going to say. This is not about me, but my friend, a story off her, but not her real name. Please enjoy. Prolong. I'm going to drag this out. You can just go ahead and say it right now. We're going to prolong.

Okay, let's wait. Let me introduce myself. I am Thunder to prolong. Okay, let's wait. 99 bottles of beer on the wall. Let me introduce myself. I am Thunder, Thunder Watersky, but people call me Boom and I don't even know why.

I'm a poet and didn't know it. Oh, that's terrible. All right. I'm in eighth grade. No shit. I feel like my life is a hot mess.

That's correct. Like no other eighth grader ever. So far, everything's normal I'm in 8th grade and my life sucks Holy shit Just moved school but still in the same town And my life is going downhill

Not in grades or growing but friends And just plain old life Want me to tell you why? Of course you do Sure I do You're not even in grades. They just sit you outside the hallway every day. And then there's an author's note

after the prologue. Of course. Sorry so short, I always have short prolongs. Oh, now I see. Now I see what a prologue is. I have short prolongs? I've got a prescription for that. Chapter 1.

Now let's start form the beginning. Okay, right. In my old school, everyone loved me. I was the though good at sports tomboy and all my best friends were the most popular guys. What? You sound rad. Yeah.

Oh, shit. No one dared to mess with me, and if it does happen, bow, done and gone. What? Or maybe it's bow, done and gone. I don't know. I catch all the meanness in order and help everyone. Yay.

My best friend ever, the shaggy blonde hair with deep blue eyes, muscular football player that in every love story they fall in love with. Oh. Named Oliver. Yeah. He told me everything. He told me everything. I told him everything. When he flirted with someone, I would punch him.

And when I flirted with someone, he would drag me away. Oh, I thought he would punch her. That sounds like a really super healthy relationship. We would stick up for Etcher and never fight. Only ever who gets to get the last piece of pie. Oh. Guys are wacky. I loved him, semicolon. He loved me. We never told Etcher kind of pie. Oh. You guys are wacky. I loved him, semicolon.

He loved me. We never told Etcher kind of knew. As in past tense of know. Who the hell is Etcher? I don't know. Either? They must mean either. No, I think it's actually,

there's some third party there who was also carving things and just taking notes. Yes. He was like a brother, but in a loving way. Brothers can't love each other. Yes. He was like a brother, but in a loving way. Brothers can't love each other. Nope.

He's like my brother, except he's someone who doesn't yank the underwear up my ass. Because, okay, this is a giant paragraph, where was I? Okay, but all that changed when I left. The last day came before I moved schools. He took my hands and put them on his sides, for I am taller than him by a few inches.

He put his hands on my hips and moved forward and kissed him lightly. Oh, yeah. He put his hands on my hips and he kissed himself lightly. Yeah, kiss the etcher. Wow. He put his hand up on your hips. When you kissed, he kissed, they kissed. Yeah, him.

Then I went on for longer and longer, kissing and kissing. Nobody should get that reference. I got it. Yeah, me too. And I hate you for it. The picked me up till we got outside, and then I waved goodbye with tears down my eyes and ran home. Half of joy and the other half sadness. Now you think my life

is great having a boyfriend and all well think again. I moved schools. No! That's the worst thing that's ever happened! Guys, I really relate to Thundersky Watersport or whatever her name was. You know,

Isvan, I'm so sorry, but I feel like I would like you to skip chapter two and instead move on to chapter two. Okay, yeah. I'm going to skip the first chapter two. I'm going to move down to the second chapter two, which is really all while you're here. Now, most of you think this can't get worse. Well, look at this. Oh gosh! Meaning the text that follows. Look at it!

Then I saw the redhead again and asked, what is you name? And he said, kiss my A, star star, or other word butt. Oh no! I don't really remember what he said to be honest. Kiss my other word butt. Kiss the butt of the other word butt. Oh no. I don't really remember what he said, to be honest. Kiss my other word butt. Kiss the butt of the other word.

I stared down at him and held him against the wall and said, don't mess with me. Then when I bring him down, he ran for a teacher and said, that girl over there just bullied me. Then the teacher car marching over. Oh my gosh, it's the car from Roger Rabbit. Young whatever

you are, detention for luch and after school. Right then my heart stopped with anger and shock. You got detention for roughing someone up. This is the worst thing that's ever happened. It's a bad condition. The teacher really believes that. Then I ran off outside where Sam saw me and said you oak

putting his hand on my shoulder I was so mad that I ripped it away and ran into the near by field that they use for running so I was sticking to the theme of the field his rage is uncontrollable this is where all the middle schoolers have their little hissy fits

this is the running away field. Hey, how's it going? Can I help you? Oh, God! Spurting blood. Where'd Jay go? Oh, she's out in Angst Field. She ripped a dude's arm off and then ran into the field.

And no one was there right then and there. But Sam fallowed me, so he didn't plant anything in me that season. And sat next to me and held my hand and there, but Sam fallowed me, so he didn't plant anything in me that season. And sat next to me and held my hand and said, I know it's hard, everyone here is so huge part in story. What? That was the weirdest aside.

Here is so huge part in story? Yeah, huge part in story is in Was that like redacted? I don't understand what happened there. No, I think this is the author leaning into our ears and going, this part's important. Huge part in the story, get ready for it. Pay attention. This part's important.

Also, by me telling you this part's important, I'm going to talk over the words of the story so you all know what she was really saying. Okay. Judgmental. Is that a new dude? Yeah, judgmental. Because I think I dude? Yeah, judgmental. Because I think I would like that dude as a character.

Hello! I am a judge! Yes! Guilty! Oh, so innocent! You will now be back to a cat about toys! His gavel is one of those squeaky mallets. I nodded, then

Sam leaned in and kissed me. He kissed me on the cheek. He was smaller than me, but not as strong, and looked at me. I pushed him away and ran... All you do is just push people away and rip stuff off of them. Make out with people.

Wait, I just read the rest of the sentence. I pushed him away and ran back into the school. So you pushed someone away and ran into the field, then pushed someone away there and ran into the school. You're playing Pong with this person's emotions. Where'd Jay go? Oh, she ran back into the school.

She's probably in Angst Hall. He already had a girlfriend, and I had a boyfriend done being big. Let me tell you right then and there, I felt empty being the first week and all. Now my life got more messed up. I didn't know what to say or do. Are you getting it now? Uh, not really.

You know, it was a really interesting writing choice to have the part of this 8th grade girl played by the Incredible Hulk. Let's continue. I think we should skip forward. Let's get to chapter seven. Yeah, yeah, yeah. John, take chapter seven, would you?

Okay. The next day school was out for the weekend, so I wrote poems. Yay! Okay, my first poem is Alone. First poem ever by that title. How is this part of the narrative? Even when no more tears fall, even when people say, now you're good, I still feel alone. With love slowly drifting away from my heart, for my heart, rather.

That was my first poem. Oh, yeah, well done. By the way, anybody listening, anytime I say your, assume that I'm using the wrong usage for it. Regardless of where it is. You would be correct every time. So with that in mind,

your love hurts me even more. Yeah, you're really right. Shit. When you hug me, I shatter. When you say you love me, I fall. When you hug me, I shatter. When you say you love me, I fall. When you kiss me, I wish that I would die. Because I know you didn't care at all. Yay!

And then perfect is just a word. One of the few I spelled correctly. Yeah. Pleased. Wow, okay. Let's try this again. Please stop breaking me with that word. I can't take it anymore.

Even though I know it's just a word from you, I feel like it's all my life down a drain. It's so, so lousy. Oh, I have a little disclaimer from a Fluthy Bundlesnatch or whatever her name is. Okay, sure, good. Anyone can use theses names of poems for usernames or in a story, even the poems just say I made it. If you want to make multiple theses, I just do like a college study based on these poems. Several college studies, I guess. So if you want to use the very creative titles alone,

Your Love Hurts Even More, Perfect is Just a Word, then feel free. Then she's just letting that go. It's open source poetry titles. Damn. Creative commons. I'm really sorry. I'm not finished.

God damn it. I'm just going to rip I'm not finished! I'm so sorry. God damn it. Jesus. I'm just gonna rip your arm off and then run into a field. I'm really mad. Or, if we are already in the field, I'm going to run back into the school. You better not kiss me. Okay, I am really sorry for the delay, but I was going to write tonight.

Ken, that's not the word you're thinking of. But I went to a band concert, and it was so loud and I was lightheaded from playing now. I have a huge headache. Sorry, write tomorrow. Form playing. So we also got a live journal entry in our narrative. That's good.

I went to the band concert in my motor car with my paper money. Well, the important thing is that this story finishes strong um you know like like it it takes you on a journey and sometimes you're confused but but know that you're gonna end up in an exhilarated place so uh john if you just finish us up with the final chapter chapter nine chapter nine okay there i hated my. That day I went and thought of turning emo.

Oh! What a life change! Yes. Are you ready to flip that switch? Ready to commit. It would be hard. I'd have to be, like, really self-involved and moody. Instead of my bangs going back, they're going to go down now.

Yes, that day I almost killed someone. So nice, right? It was seven days after my suspension. I then went back to school, and Laura walked in with her followers and her pregnant belly. Hello, pregnant belly. How are you doing? Is a fetus not considered a follower? I mean, technically.

No, it's like a zero or something. I like the order. It was Laura, then the followers, then the pregnant belly. My name's Laura. This is my follower, Daryl. This is my pregnant belly, Daryl. Hello.

Then she walks over to me and bragged, I am having twins. Then lift up her shirt and explained, I pregnant and going to have a beautiful babies bet you are never going to have children like mine then she shoved her belly in my face and stormed off oh my god

wow she is literally rubbing her pregnancy in her face I like twins you like them too well bam my twins kicked her ass pregnant pregnant get in there There you go. My twins kicked her ass. Pregnant. Pregnant.

Get in there. She went to the Vladimir Angst infirmary. I then sat there on the bench and looked at her, not wanting to say anything at all, but then she walked back over to B, just exist, and whispered in my ear, You are never going to be as great as B. I am best, you are the worst, and I am having children when you are not. Is this the villain of the story? I can't tell.

No, guys, don't you know all girls who are pregnant when they're teenagers, they brag about their pregnancy. Yeah, exactly. Oh my god, you're so much more popular now. Yeah. And it really speaks volumes to think that the claim to fame is whoever gets pregnant first wins. My advice to any teen girls out there listening to our podcast who may have self-esteem issues,

get pregnant. That will really help. Yeah. Then you'll be the belle of the ball. All the other girls will be jealous of you. Today is the first day of the rest of your life. And the rest of your life is going to be somebody else's. Keep getting pregnant

until you have twins, and then you'll really be at the top. Wait, do you understand how pregnancy works? Yeah! Well, these are teenage girls. They've got to get this going. You know, they live a lot faster than we do. I am not pregnant enough.

Everyone knows teenage girl hierarchy is based on how fertile someone is. Yeah. All right. All right. All right. Okay. This is up here. Where am I?

I sat there still and the got up and away. Right. I understood deep down in my heart she was right. I am would never have children. Space comma. I understood deep down in my heart she was right. I am would never have children. Space comma. I couldn't. No one knew that but my parents and I. But that didn't matter because I wasn't mad about that.

It didn't hurt me at all. Sure. That's why I journaled about it. I was so mad about the thing that doesn't bother me. Okay. She did get on my nerves. No one should care about that she is worthless.

For me, I just wanted to kill her. Our hero wants to kill a pregnant woman. And steal her baby and put it inside me. It's my baby now. Your pregnant belly is now my follower. Then behind, I heard her throw up and she screamed. I kept walking to my

locker and there I saw a note with flower taped above it. The note said, I know that you never meant the stuff you said to me and did. I forgive you and I know you really love me. You just had to have time to think. Sam. Oh, so not the pregnant girl.

Okay. Oh, that's a nice note. I threw the paper to the ground. I'm still ripping it up. Throwing it out. I took the flower and dumped them in the trash. Anger raced through my body. I threw my stuff in my locker and ran outside, smashing the door open.

That door swung, hitting the brick wall. And I ran to the gentle stream off the mountain near the school. I was the only person who knew about it well, I though, then saw Grant sitting there next to the stream, sitting on one of the large rocks. I walked over to him and put my hand on his shoulder. He jumped a little, then saw me, and I sat next to him watching the stream. My eyes met his, and I asked softly, why are you here? This is my stream.

Looks like someone's a little lost. Looks like you didn't pay the looking tax. Does this sound like an angry troll at this point? Pay my bridge. Let's see. Grant turned his face to mine, and I saw tears dripping down it slowly. Sure. I saw tears drip down human face.

For me right now, I was a reek, and so was me. We have consensus. We got the last line and then another pen name for this person. He then wiped the tears off and explained, and this was apparently written by Clife Hanger. Yeah, J. Squirrel has about a 10% success rate on homonyms.

Clife's not even a word! Yeah, that's true. The other ones are somewhat understandable misspellings and wrong usage, but what the fuck is Clife? Clife? Clife Hanger. The Adventures of Clife Hanger! He then wiped the tears off and explainedifehanger.

He then wiped the tears off and explained Cliffhanger. That's really how you wanted to end your story. That's how you tell people it's a cliffhanger. You have to denote it with Clifehanger. Oh, by the way, would you guys like to know my signature?

Well, they could have been French. It might have been Cliffhanger. I got pictures of a bunch of stupid fake animals and a Pokemon. you guys like to know my signature before i couldn't have been cliffay i know i got a pictures of a bunch of stupid fake animals and a pokemon uh and a puppy and then before that it says the very deep line when we first met he said my name over and then said your name is like my favorite skate company okay oh j squirrel skates so then. So there's the one post and then there's like 12 pages of him saying, I edited this.

I added more and then I edited it. Yep. Bump. Yes, yes. So for those of you who don't know how forums work, when you post something that says bump, you basically want to put it to the top of the forum list. And the first bump on this thread is by one J Squirrel. Somebody read my story!

3, 36, 2, So they bumped it after like 40 minutes. After, yeah. Come on! One more comment and I will post more. That's a threat. Pay attention to me.

But yeah, they kept editing that first post, which is why You're getting live journal updates in the middle of the story Yep Alright You know what's There's only one thing that I think Is sexier than romance tales

And that is Law school This is a story called No laws about love It's a law school. This is a story called No Laws About Love. It's a law school romance, and it's accepting. I don't know what that means. But anyway, there's no laws about love.

So, Boots, if you'll go to post two and explain the laws of the story here. Wait, but there's no laws. There's no laws about love, but there are the laws of law school. So I'm second post by Miss Hardy here? Law school is not love.

I'm Miss Hardy. And my avatar is Miss Shardy. Right. It hurts so much to love you the way I do and then look at you and realize how much you don't care. And then a bunch of stars.

Alright, the laws of law school. Alright. And then something in a font that's way too small for me. It says breakable. Breakable. The laws of law school. Breakable.

Bedrooms are for sleeping, studying, Breakable. Breakable. With asterisks on either side. The laws of law school. Breakable. Breakable. Bedrooms are for sleeping, studying, and doing homework. Want to hang out, stay in the lounge. Yeah, I said it. Yeah, nobody fucks in dorm beds. I don't even think that's possible. What's fucking? This school is co-ed, but your bedrooms aren't.

Oh, damn. Only gay sex here at the law school. Oh, boy. Relationships are allowed, but they are looked down upon, and you are recaminated to keep it professional at all times.

I love it when someone gets to a word they can't spell and they just fucking go hog wild on the keyboard. Probably has some vowels in there. Recommended. Editing is something you make me do at school, but I'm at home. I don't feel like it. Emotional breakdowns are ignored. This is why relationships

are looked down upon. If you can't handle the unavoidable breakup, you shouldn't be in the relationship. And you obviously can't handle the unavoidable breakup, you shouldn't be in the relationship. And you obviously can't handle the stress of being an attorney. Is this like a law school where there's forced celibacy? Yeah. This is a school for robot attorneys.

Robot attorneys do not have relationships. This is supposed to be a premise for role-playing, but I guess they're trying to make a very sexually repressive environment just so people will break it. Yeah, anytime somebody starts talking about

their personal interests, I'm like, you should be studying Roe vs. Wade, you asshole. Hey, hey, hey, now let's be fair. These people knew what they were getting into when they joined the St. Augustine School of Law. Alright, keep going. The teachers may be close to you in age,

but don't even think about it. Hint, hint. Any reports of students sharing affection with teachers will be looked into, and, should the student be convicted, the student will spend the remainder of the year in the detention bunk. Violators will be spanked!

The detention bunk is made of leather. The detention bunk is five rooms in one small building. They're all separated in every way, shape, and form. Students sent here are pretty much under house arrest. They are strung up with an elaborate setup of dildos and leather. They attend classes, have occasional study sessions, and are escorted back to the detention bunk. You are required to attend dinner every night in the dining room.

If you skip and attend, it will be sent to your room to check on you, unless you are dying. Odds are, you'll be spending a couple of days in the detention bunk. So this is what you think law school is like? This should just be reverse psychology, a primer. Whatever you do, don't think about having a relationship with your teacher. No fucking... Oh, by the way, I play all the teachers. So, you know, just saying.

Apparently the name of the school is Pre-Sown, I think? I don't know. I'm reading that weird guy. There is not a dress code, but we do not want to see the trash walking... What? Oh, sorry. There is not a dress code, but we do not want to see trash walking the halls of McCartney. Are you kidding me?

Any attendant who sees us will write you up, and you will receive a punishment. They could be as small as cleaning whiteboards or as big as a month in the detention bunk. Hey, you! Hey, you! 23-year-old, who's paying $40,000 a year to be here? Take off that weed shirt! Yeah. The commons are not a place for gossip.

You may talk, but any he said, she said, and you'll be asked to leave. Copyright Ms. Hardy. If I see you using this, I will report you and you'll go to the detention box. Send me. Oh, Ms. Hardy, send me

to the detention box, please. Wow, Ms. Hardy, you seem fun. Okay, so that's the page of rules. And after that is... This looks like an Ikea catalog. I don't want to attend Lemony Snicket's Lost World. So after that is some interior design photos,

because that's what you care about. Then there's the weather, and then there's a character list with, like, NPCs. And then, after that, is some rules. Oh, goddammit. Didn't we already cover the rules?

Well, those are the laws. Those are the laws. These are the rules. About law school. All right. ACR, if you'll take the rules, please. How does it work? Hmm.

I'm strict. Get over it. There's this magical thing called reality. Guess what? We live in it. Keep the role-playing realistic. Realistic, or else you'll go to the detention bunk.

Oh, that sounds good. From this writing, I've got the distinct feeling this is going to sound a lot like Tooth Griffin wrote this. You're not amazing. You might have talent, but no one is amazing. Neither is your character. I don't give two hoots about

what your character thinks she slash she is. It's what you think she slash she is. What? Your character isn't the best and is as good as any other character. I don't care if it personifies you. It's no better than the one that personifies me. Personifies isn't in my dictionary. I guess I'll add it. This lady's already

berating your character and you haven't even made them yet. What's the piece of shit? So, hey. You want to be a teen mom? Sure, probably. Cool. Find another roleplay. Oh, shit.

Frankly. Where's Fluttersnake's spundercuts? Where's hers? Look, this just disgusts me. My first high school was packed with ninth grade moms, and even seeing a roleplay with this kind of theme repulses me, especially since my mom was one. A roleplay?

Good! Your mom was a roleplay? She was. It was really gross. You might want to fix your neckline. Your mom was a role play? She was. It was really gross. You might want to fix your neckline. Your issues are showing. Yeah. If I think, if any, I think I might be pregnant.

I've so much as thought by your characters. I'm kicking you out. No exceptions. Role playing thought crimes. That's right. All right. Look, I respect all sexualities. I'm hollering.

You sound very respectful. If I find when you open the door for a few, the entire lot floods in and we end up with a completely gay slash bisexual roleplay. Huh? On a furry site? There goes the roleplay neighborhood. Listen, I'm not against them.

I just think they should stay on their side of the bus. Look, how you expect me to jerk off to gay role-play, I don't know. Now, if you PM me with a very good explanation, you know, a few detailed paragraphs, then I may allow you a character. But I warn you, you could very well be the only one. What the f- You need special permission from this woman to be gay? Pretty much.

Okay, good. Good, you seem fun. Let's hang out. The only reason this entire roleplay exists is to please her, so... Keep going. And perhaps she'll only allow one gay person. Yes. I would join up, be gay, and just post about my masturbation constantly.

But it'd be gay masturbation, I'll tell you. Other men, other men, other men! Humans do it. Teenagers do it. I understand. But we don't need you flaunting your character's dirty laundry all over the roleplay. Jesus. I hope you get what I mean. Full pipe. Keep it child-friendly, full pipe.

Why the fuck would you keep this child-friendly? It's a furry roleplaying site, for fuck's sake. It's a furry roleplaying site, and this is like Victorian, you know dominatrix esque

creepy law school. Alright, keep going because there's a whole bunch of more rules. Alright. You marry Sue? Get out! Now! By definition, everyone on this site isn't married to Sue. That's why they're here. Everybody gets out then.

That's the rule. You're always writing yourself into the story. There's already a rule similar to this, but I cannot stand these kind of people. Makes me want to target their character for the entire remainder of the roleplay's life. Which I'm sure is very long.

Do you really want to be targeted? Didn't think so. You get one warning, and then I kick you out. Do you really want to be targeted? Didn't think so. You get one warning, and then I kick you out. You don't want to bring that target down on your head. That's right. I'm a fucking badass. What else?

Drama! I want drama! But we don't need you flaunting your character's dirty laundry all over the roleplay. In order for drama to happen, there's got to be some hyper-aggressive, really self-involved person. What are you talking about? Huh?

There hasn't been anything so far to suggest that there will be drama. We didn't get to that part, but there's a rule where you make fun of me and I kick you out. So you're out, Lemon. Get out of here. All right, keep going.

Cheating girlfriends slash boyfriends, students hooking you're out, Lemon. Get out of here. All right, keep going. Cheating girlfriends slash boyfriends. Students hooking up with teachers. Anything. Just keep it child-friendly. Go bloody someone's nose in the middle of the hallway. Just don't stay in their suit. X. D.

As long as there aren't too many dudes banging each other apparently. I'm aware of the magical land of love. Guess what? What's that? In 2002, it went extinct. Oh, no. Shit. Oh. I'm aware of the magical land of love. Guess what? What's that? As of 2002, it went extinct. Oh, no. Shit.

Oh. Is that when the guy that you like told you that he doesn't like you back? Yeah, pretty much. That was horrible. Cut myself on the edge. The high school loves, let's face it, just don't stay together. Why should high school characters? This is law school, you idiot. Yeah.

High school law school. That's a good question, though. Why should high school characters this is law school you idiot yeah high school law school that's a good question though why should high school characters I'm guessing in 2002 the guy she was dating figured out that he was gay and she didn't take the news well let me explain that before you argued that your parents are high school sweethearts

my best friend and her boyfriend both swore they would be together forever. Guess what? They broke up a few days ago. Get over it. Fuck your anecdotal evidence. I have anecdotal evidence that proves otherwise. That's right.

You know what? I see no reason not to take relationship advice from the person with all the issues and is writing out a furry roleplay for him. Yeah. Spam. That's a sentence. I do it a lot with random snippets about my day. Honestly, I hope you don't find it boring.

I mean, I don't mind if you do it, too, as long as you're roleplaying nice long posts at the time. And when I say shut up, shut up! Rolls like QQL. I'm saying it for a reason. set the time. And when I say shut up, shut up! Or else I kick you out. I'm saying it for a reason. Now, I'm a very real person. I will say it like it is. Don't like what I say? Don't be in my roleplay!

I'll never try to hurt your feelings or pick on you for any reason. Ever. Unless you're gay. If you ever feel like I am, please PM me. This does not include characters. My characters are all going to have someone they really don't like.

I have no problem believing that. Really. Keep your forums updated. Got a crush? Let us know. In a relationship? Telling us would be helpful. If you see that the front page isn't updated even after your information is, shoot me a PM. I'm never too busy.

I know, that comes as a shock to you. I can't imagine there's so much finance you probably need to do in a day. Let me wrap this up. Oh god, please do. I will be adding more. But please get to know me before judging me on my rules.

I'm actually quite fun to be around. Oh, and just for the folks listening, every fucking one of her posts is centered text. That's how she writes. Oh, God, it is. That didn't hit me. Oh, man. And copyright Miss Shardy.

If I catch you using this, I will report you. Copyright. Copyright. She does soundy. If I catch you using this, I will report you. Copyright. Copyright. She does sound quite fun to be around. Oh, no, Miss, just don't send me to the detention room. Don't. Oh, no. So this thing has 23 pages.

Oh. For reasons that are completely beyond me, people actually introduce characters, right? There's a number of them. And they have these huge fucking bios. Yeah. And then that goes on for four or five pages, and then they just write back and forth

either one of two things. There's either one sentence post, like, Michael opens a door and sees Carrie inside. Crystal walks back and forth and falls over. She sets up quickly. Oops, she says, smiling sheepishly. No, period. Lilith's raven black eyebrows lifted in surprise.

Really, she asked, a frown on her pale face. She held her hot cocoa in her hands, not drinking anymore at the moment. And that's, like, one of the last things that appears in this whole forum. Michael logged on and glanced at her with a smile. I'm from Oklahoma. Sort of boring, he shrugged in the thought, except for the tornadoes. Sorry about that. Drama. Drama.

Wow. Fantastic. So, yeah, the other thing that happens is that people complain that they can't write because they have writer's block. Yeah, writer's block. So they can't write anything as interesting as this. Hi, I'm going to join this RP. Well, I got nothing.

Okie dokie, Loki. Yeah, that's the last post. So, uh, this role, this, uh, this story is called Survival of the Strangest. And it's accepting. I guess accepting in this means that they're taking new characters.

I'm just realizing that now. Oh, they got a backwards font for this. Damn. They do. The backwards font is actually built into the site. Of course it fucking is. This ridiculous backwards S, backwards R, there's a thing inside of the O font

is stocked to the site. Anyway. Survival of the strangest. This world is very different from the one most of us know and survive in today. An alien world, if you will. A wondrous, dangerous place where creatures out of the dreams walk unhindered and proud. I know. A place where purebred humans are the enemy of

many endangered creatures, and where many creatures are the sworn enemy of all. At least you're speaking in specifics. Well, there is... Alright, M9, I'll see you after Earth. Just shut up. There is one. Goddamn humans!

Oh, humans are... We hate humans! The enemies of creatures are creature enemies in the enemy fight on creatures. Creature fight on enemy mountain. So you can be... It's a bunch of things. You can be... If you want to be human,

these two-leggers we all know about. They tend to live in towns and villages. Thanks. You're welcome for that information. There's also animals. And then there's shifters. They tend to live in towns and villages. Thanks. You're welcome for that information. There's also animals. And then there's shifters and dryads. And they're not talking about cars, I guess.

No. No. Oh. Just the portions of cars. And then there's naiads, which is a type of female nymph who whatever. But there are some rules. Okay. Okay. This really is an RP where anyone can play out

a life of their own with magic or realism. Basically, anything and everything is possible. Okay, nuke the world. That's a good idea. Okay, I want to be Hitler.

Can I be Hitler? I'm really tired of you doing that in every RP. But everything was possible. I wanted to nuke a world! Can I also be Hitler, but can I be nuke-proof? Ooh! Shit! I want to be Hitler, but really,

really hot, and I have to move because all the girls are crushing on me. In that case, boots on. I'm Mecha-Hitler and also nuke-proof and we gotta fight it out. Oh, sweet. Yes. Jesus. Okay. This RP stuff is awesome. I'm loving it. Yeah. Okay,

so we wanted to get to Crimson Death. Oh, already liking this. What? Do you mean like when I slit my wrist so I don't have to listen to this bullshit anymore? That kind of Crimson Death? Boots, if you'll scroll down to Crimson Death? Boots, if you'll scroll down to Crimson Death there.

Oh god, this is awesome. Oh, I'm Crimson Death. Oh dear. And my character is named Valentine Cloud. Oh gee. I wonder what game this person likes.

I'm Valentine Cloud and I'm female. this person likes. I'm Valentine Cloud, and I'm female. 20 years old. Want to know about my creature? I sure do. Probably. Yeah. She is what you could call an archangel. No, she is what you would could a archangel.

Oh, she is what you would could a archangel. What was like, you would could a Archangel. What a shit I could have. Wow. A half-breed between a angel and a god. Oh, god. They are very strong creatures, but not gods, so they could be brought down.

Worst enemies are Archdemons or anything demon. You are an angel. You are an archangel. You are the most powerful being. The only thing that can defeat you is evil. Just anything. Oh, shit. I'm sure that won't

be a problem. It's like you're Superman. The world is made of kryptonite. It's like, oh, shit. I'm sure this RP thing is filled with people going, ah, I'm an evil demon. I kill everything. Yeah. All right.

What I am is boring. You want to know what I look like, right? Absolutely. Valentine is a very short, standing a few inches from five feet. She is very pale like most angels, and she has white wings just like most angels. Okay. What is different

about her is the godly traits okay sure wings are have golden stripes fine she has white furred ears with a gold sake she has white furred ears with a golden golden trim right she's like the half-child of like Easter Bunny or something I guess no she looks like all angels so from? So she's like the half-child of, like, Easter Bunny or something? I guess. Well, no, she looks like all angels. So from the Bible, she's covered with eyes. She holds all the tribes of Judah in one hand and Israel in the other.

And her mouth is throwing a sword at Jesus. That's pretty much how angels look in the Bible. So, you know, that's what I'm picturing. Isn't one of them like a flaming wheel? Sure, why not? That's good. Ears with a golden trim and a long thin white fur tail with a golden ring at the end.

Her eyes are beautiful sky blue with golden flakes. Her eyes are full of gold schlager. Are she? Her eyes are... She's got metallic dandruff coming off her eyeballs all the time. She has a condition.

Her hair is a bright orange. She wears a short white shirt, so her pale, flat stomach is showing with long, baggy, golden-trimmed sleeves. Her pants is a knee-length, flowing white dress. So it's not pants. Her pants are a dress. Yeah, there you go. So her pants is white dress. So it's not pants. Her pants are a dress. So her pants is a dress. Yes, it's a knee-length dress,

otherwise known as a skirt. Maybe? Whatever. With golden butterflies embroidered into it. That's so cruel! Those golden butterflies deserve to live? God damn it. I hate you. History lesson! Oh, good! Yeah!

History of Crimson's death. No, that's me. Oh, the history of Valentine Cloud? The history of Valentine Cloud! In case you forgot. She is a kind and gentle soul. Yay. Most people are surprised by it because of her past.

She was born into a small angelic island in the sky. What? Since she could ever remember, she was hated by all the angels expect for her mother. Because she was too beautiful, right? Yeah. Well, hang on. Hang on. What's the next sentence?

All the females hated her because she got all the guys' attention by her godly aura. I did not read ahead. God fucking dam attention by her godly aura. I did not read ahead. God fucking damn it. I know. I know. So the females hated her because she got the guys' attention.

What about the guys? All the guys hated her because they thought Valentine hypnotized them. A lot of them tried to gain her affection. She hypnotized them. No women like her. No men like her. Also, she is very popular. Sorry. Sorry. No women like her. No men like her. Also, she is very popular. Sorry.

Sorry. I was confused there. Because they thought Valentine hyponatized them. Thank you. And yet she hypnotized them with her godly Thank you.

Yes. Her eyes went really big and bugged out when she did a wolf whistle. Oh, shit. A lot of them would try to gain her affection because of her power. After her mom had died when she was 18,

she moved away into the human realm where she always hides her mixed blood and acts human when she isn always hides her mixed blood and acts human when she isn't in her home. So she acts human except for like the wings and the ears and the tail and the arua. I hope they don't see my blood.

She makes her blood from a mix. I like that they try and gain her affection. It's like the guys go up to her man, you fucking bitch, you hyponatized me, I can't believe it. So what are you doing tonight? Powers. A lot of her powers are unknown, for she is untrained. All she knows is a few spells, like one to hide with humans, one to heal, and elemental ones.

She is a Aroa reader. I really think it's spelled that way. Oh, she a Arua reader. Yay! I really think it's spelled that way. She reads Arua. She can read other people's Aruas. See their emotions. You keep mispronouncing Arua. It's really making me mad.

See their emotions. The name and lifespan and sometimes their thoughts. Is your name inside of your aura? I don't really know. I don't know if it's inside of her aura. It's like an MMO when you examine somebody. Do you have any weaknesses?

Not much is known about this subject as well. God damn it. If you didn't want to write this, just say so. There's a bold statement. Okay, I'm ready. She could die from fatal wounds. Shit! That is how fatal wounds happen, yes.

She dies from death! Such as cutting off her head, a blow to the head, a stab through her heart or lungs. No, no, no, no. She always seems... We gotta be precise with this. Oh, a stab trough her heart or lungs? Yes! Right.

Because you gotta stab troughough for whatever that is. That's the mystery you've got to figure out. Do you want to know about her children? Oh, God, I guess so. Yeah, not for a long while. Sure. Glad I know that now. Okay, so this is...

My name is Shadows Cry in the Night, and this is Sayara, or just Seer. She's an 18-year-old female. Seer is not entirely human, but there's not really anything else to call her. Perhaps Fire Elemental would work? Seer has control over fire, meaning she can control any existing

flames or simply make some of her own. She may look like a simple human girl, but her red-orange eyes and slightly pointed ears say otherwise. She moves very gracefully and silently, and she is stronger and faster

than humans. She also heals more quickly than normal humans, which is rather useful when one plays with fire so much. Mm-hmm. Yeah. She can occasionally, if it's absolutely necessary, and she has the energy, turn into smoke. Got to fill out a bunch of forms for this.

She cannot turn back. Yay! The end! Is this a Mortal Kombat roleplay? Get over here and write a shitty character. Fantastic! She gives new meaning to the phrase fiery temper if she's angry enough she simply explodes incinerating everything

within a half a mile radius then she tends to pass out she stole my new powers the bitch Ciara wins shame on me that's enough for her what I was really invested wins. Shame on me. That's enough for her. What? I was really invested in that really well-developed character.

I want to hear more. Tall, slender, long, dark hair. Answer this question. What's your question that you would like answered? Yes, crush, if any. Yeah, right. Thanks. What? She's another orphan. Yeah, right. Okay. Thanks.

What, she's another orphan? Well, blow me down. Yeah. She's all cool and aloof? Wow. I'm going to make a radical new character who's reasonably well socialized and has parents. All right, I guess we should close with the dog roleplay.

Oh, yes. Oh, God. Which, by the way, is different from the wolf roleplay, which we also had. So is this like actual dogs, or is this some more of that dog-hog-sherlock shit? It looks like actual dogs. Let's find out.

I don't know if that's better or worse, now that I think about it. Well, that doesn't rule out dicks, necessarily. Fair enough. Yeah. Okay. It's fine. If you'll walk us through the dog RP. Okay.

Dog RP, here come, new and accepting. Yes! About, there are dogs in the day that are nice, loving, normal dogs, but at nice, loving, normal dogs. But at nice, they all have a diffident life. Yay! Holy crap!

Swing and a miss. Holy God! That's fantastic! I want to have a diffident life, too. Yeah. They all meet, as in flesh, at one spot which no human has seen before. They have missions. Diffident life. I really think that's the word.

No, it doesn't. Hold on. Everything is diffent at night. God damn, they can't do it, can they? They cannot seal that deal. At night when the people, they, are asleep. Alright, what are the rules?

One, be clear. Be at least as clear as I'm being. Two, must be tamed dog, so not wolf. Not a wolf or anything. Yeah, good lord. If you're a wolf, you get sent to the detention bunk. The detention kennel. There you go.

But your signature is just a million pictures of wolves. Those are dogs. One of them is radioactive, apparently. Oh, you're right. They're all exactly the same, except with different backgrounds. Yeah. Three, no forcing people's dog to fall in love. Come on, do it! You're in love with him!

Four, must fill out all that is on the fill-out sheet Yes Because I don't know what word to use What's the name of a sheet that you fill out? I just have no idea Fill out sheet, come on You know exactly what he's talking about He is being clear

Yes, he's following the rules Five, if you have any questions, please ask me Okay, I have a question Where is he? What weight oil should I use in my 2002 Subaru? 10w40 Okay, the fill out sheet is Name, looks like, age, gender, breed, crush

Puppies, how your dog aces And background How your dog aces My dog aces was a lot of cake I'm guessing that's supposed to say acts. Aces, yeah. What the fuck is background? Background.

Oh, I thought it was like, do you have a round butt? Is it a square butt? Yeah, it's a dog's round back. Background. Alright, Acer, if you'll start us off. Toxic Wolf, what are you into? I'm into dogs, dogs, dogs, dogs, dogs, dogs, bones. The show Bones.

Tell me, what would you like to hear? I would like to hear your two characters, Toxic Wolf. My name is Fly, and I still look like this, which is some kind of nice dog. He's a pretty nice dog, don't you think? Sure, he's a fine dog. Well, he's not a wolf. You will not mistake him for a wolf.

Right. How old are you? I am one year and six months old. Okay. And a female, in case you couldn't tell. I couldn't tell either, actually. I'm going to check. I guess I'm a spotted border collie.

Okay. And I'm crushing on Slayden. So somebody make a dog named Slayden. Puppies? Maybe later. I keep my options open. My dog Aces is very nice. Very nice. Playful.

He's varying degrees of nice. Now, about my round back. Is the runt of the lighter small for her age? When she was a puppy, she was the last one to get picked, form the litter, but now has a good home with a kiddo mama

dad. Okay. She's a runt of the leader. She's the bottom of that Coke bottle. Yeah, here is... That's the correct spelling of litter there. No, there's... Sorry, I said it twice.

She's the runt of of litter there. No, there's... Oh, it's the first letter. I missed it. Sorry, you're right. She's the runt of the leader, Smal. Now, Spike, and here's a picture of a dog with a big watermark under his eye. Right. So it looks like a watermark. He is two-year. His gender is Malay.

The breed is Rotty. It's a Rottweiler. All the female dogs in the RP, they are all cute. May beside which one to go with later in the RP? Wow, Spike's a player. Yeah, I haven't beside it yet. Puppies, maybe. Managed to type all that without using the word bitches.

Bitches in the RP say ho! It's going to be a difficult thing to avoid. How I aces. I am kind to the ones he love and mean to the other people and dogs. My background. Parents when in dog fights, mom gave birth to four puppies.

Spike was the kind one. Found a family with a dad and a kid. That's all I got. I'm done now. Dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, bones. Dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, bones. Bump. Bump.

Two bumps. Three bumps. The bump is like every night. I'm bumping it every nine minutes here. Bump. Apparently this person loves winged wolves from the icon Dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog flying wolf bones

There we go Aether, in here about halfway down you start the story Oh shit There's a story that starts kind of Come back here, Spike said as he trysts to chase a mouse. Spike runs, trips

and growls. The mouse boo. He still wonders why the mouse won't come to him. He hears a buzz in his collar which means diner time. He stops what Hess done and races to his house where his owner in holding his ball. Come on, come on, come on. I am hungry,

said Spike, getting really hungry. Space period. He didn't know that he was hungry, so he said he was hungry. He's hungry. The owner turns around for a sec with the food on the table. One minute's there, the next Spike has in on the ground

eating. Such a riveting story. Oh yeah, good thing this forum exists, because I've always wanted to live in a Beggin' Strips commercial. For God's sake. That's the life I want. You know, we were making fun of the dog saying, I'm hungy, but the fact that a dog can even say that stuff is pretty impressive.

That is true. I'm riveted. It comes out as... Alright, so let's try to get a little bit of an actual story here. Raspberries haunches Sway as her tail wags faster, seeing him come out. She looks over him, admiring his strong body. Her pointy teeth flash in a faint smile. I need adults.

I thought maybe you would like to go for a walk in the park, she asks him, her eyes twinkling excitedly. Thank God, I thought that was would like to go for a walk in the park, she asked him, her eyes twinkling excitedly. Thank God, I thought that was going to... I like! I thought that was going to go somewhere. You don't even say that response, you're just like... It's parenthetical. I think this is happening exactly as Toxic Wolf has wanted it to happen.

Spike. Sure, I'd love to go for a walk with you around the lake, Spike says, coming very close to her. Well, walk, trod the lake. Rosie was sitting down next to one of T'Chai Rosebush's her owners owned. That's not funny, but it is. They own the shit out of things. That's why they're hoots.

That's right. I want to play it to a kiss from Tajay Rose. She extended her netch and gently sniffed a rose, tacking me in the sweet aroma. Oh my god. Her owner called her name and tapped a spoon on the side of a food bowl. Rosie got up and trotted over to eat.

Fly. Something. Fly, this is Head Corners. We need you now. That was awesome. Her boss says to her caller, when she owners are not looking. Fly nods her head and gets a great moment to sneak away from her owners and go to the headquarters.

Okay, another day at work. Fun in a way, Fly says to herself as she walks to her desk where there is a mission for her. I know, an important mission. Now dogs are going to work at the office? You have this intrigue really showing up.

You know what? I am completely and totally okay with it because this is the point something actually fucking happened. Fair enough. I smell the rose. Pushing bulls around. I get the feeling Toxic Wolf is even like, alright, I'm fucking tired of this shit. It's a secret agent now. Dog's a secret agent.

Just fuck it. Rust walked over to Fly's desk. He put his paws up on it and lowered his head down to her head. Hey, Fly, what's up? The brute said in a flirtatious tone and winked.

And now we're right back to the flirty creepy shit again. Yay! Now it's taking place at a secret agent headquarters. Yeah, and we're dogs work. Again, nothing's happening. It should pick up here on this page, though. John, you're gonna be

Kyla in this series of nonsense. How do I pronounce the space between every one of the letters in my name? Hi! C, stop. A, stop. How do I pronounce the space between every one of the letters in my name? Hi. C, stop.

A, stop. I can tell. Yeah, all right. M. Lewis, AMD, you are. He asked he wasn't the loving kind of dog he just needed friends. Wow. That's a story. That's part of the story right there. Rosie looked at him.

I am Rosie. The shy Faye replied. God damn it. Now it's a Faye dog. Secret agent Faye dog. When Louis saw his sister leave, he nodded at the Faye. Exit stage left.

Rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr. Sorry, no color. Rosie stood up. I'm too busy to color my text. Exit stage left. Rah, rah, rah, rah, rah. Sorry, no color. Oh, that's too bad. I'm too busy to color my text. But I will tell you how sorry I am. Rosie stood up. Oh, well, it was nice meeting you, the face said kindly. But I think I'll just go to the pond.

There are some ducks over there. She then walked away. So now we're at a pond. He nodded. Well, I've got to go too by. This RP is going places. Sladen was laying in the pond, keeping cool.

His thick fur meant he overheated quickly. He glanced up to see Rosie. His gaze followed her as she trotted past. She sat up slowly and barked a greeting. That certainly is something a dog would do. Wait, there's something wrong with that. There wasn't a typo or anything.

Yeah, you're right. I didn't even notice. Rosie jammed at the bark. She yipped, jumping back. She then looked over at Slayton. Oh, phew. I thought she were something else, she said. I'm Rosie, you?

Spike locked up Fom the lake because he thought he heard something, and he was right. It was a bunny. He'd gone into attack form. He was thinking if he could get the bunny, he would impress the girl he is with. He chastened for a bit, but he triped on a rock. The bunny got away. He hit his paw hard on the gown. It hurt, but he had

to keep it cool for the ladies. He went back over to the lake with a nice grin on his face. I really appreciate Toxic Wolf. I mean, still nothing happens in that person's post, but at least they spiced it up with some really good typos. Willow lay down away from everyone else and sigh, turning her head away from Still nothing happens in that person's post, but at least they spice it up with some really good typos. Yeah.

Willow lay down away from everyone else and sigh, turning her head away from Spike. Show kiff for a girl. How funny. She smirked, seeing the bunny the Dalmatian raced off. It turned and went into a hole. The determined Dalmatian began to dig a hole, but it went out. Another, she chased it and pounced on it, snapping its neck. She took it back and dropped it in front of Spike. You need to learn to watch where you're running if you're going to

catch anything, she smirked. Yeah, but kinda like the fall on my head, Spike said, grinning and looking into her eyes while tilling his head slightly. Oh, that's not healthy! And then one should not till their own head

Yes yes yes the very last post Right here is the Acer's next post Somebody Please reply Somebody please reply Oh that's That's where it Actually starts to occur to Toxic Wolf,

that, like, maybe a story about fucking dogs being dogs might not be the most interesting thing. I'm tired of being a nerd in real life, having awkward conversations. I'm going to be a dog on the internet having awkward conversations. I sniff a butt, and then I go find something else to sniff.

I think he really had something with that whole secret agent headquarters thing, but it's just, whenever Toxic Wolf was up to bat, he just fucking scene changed, and then everybody else had to be like, oh, okay, we're over here now. We skipped less than ten posts in the middle of that,

yet we ended up back in a lake. So everybody else is in a lake, and I want role plays where I can be a dog, so all right, I'll find no more missions. I see that as a really passive-aggressive move by Toxic Wolf. Like somebody in the group is like, oh, they're secret agents now. And Toxic Wolf is like, no, they go to a pond because they're dogs. That's what this is about. Their mission is frisbee.

I really like the subtle subtext of the power play in this RP. The meta story is way better. Yeah. Oh. and there we go around about an hour of whole new lives for people that don't have one that's not a song it's fine what did you learn this week well i learned that i'm not special song. It's fine. What did you learn this week? Well, I learned that I'm not special, but now that we visited

the site, I also feel a lot better about myself. As well you should, yes. One of the things about we've done role-playing profiles, role-playing setups before, but the thing about them is how they kind of tend to attract

a certain type of person who, through the things they share with us, they tell certain things about themselves. And we can look at it and be baffling. We can't really see the appeal, but that's because we're coming from a different place. We don't need this to fill the holes in our lives. We usually turn to booze. Yeah, yeah. It's really odd because... So I'm currently on the Chicken Smoothie

website. Now again, there's like a whole adopt-a-pet thing that I fucking do not understand on this site. So I'm sure that that's traffic as well, but I don't get it, and please don't explain it to me because I don't care. But I'm on just the forums of Chicken Smoothie

and there are 1,162 registered members online right now at this moment and that's just constant there's always about a thousand people posting in this useless stupid

shitty, pointless time vacuum of a forum well there are apparently a lot of people in this useless, stupid, shitty, pointless, like, time vacuum of a forum. Well, there are apparently a lot of people who need roleplay therapy. And it's, yeah, I mean, like, every time I look at very popular websites, I just, I recognize

that maybe I'm a little bit more special than I think, because to my mind, this looks like a fucking waste of time. Yeah, well... But if you're looking for a forum with significantly less people in it, which at this point

is a selling point, you should be going to BallPit. That is B-A-L-L-P dot I-T. It's our hand-built forum. i happen to think it looks slightly better than chicken smoothie uh and it does not contain role playing forums uh

so yeah please uh make yourself an account sign up join the conversation uh the website's t-h-e-f-p-l dot u-s and uh we'll see you next time if you'll excuse me now i think i have to go to the detention bunk well very erotic. Yeah.

It is pretty creative. I haven't heard of a vampire in a recent piece of fiction that was sarcastic. No, that looks really good on you, blah. I'm dying to learn more about your trip to Paris. Do you have slides to show?