The F Plus - 137: Please Direct Complaints to This Hole in the Ground

Episode Date: May 24, 2014

There's a lot that can enrage a person. And while that's a perfectly reasonable feeling to have, it's best if you have friends to confide in, to share in your frustrations, and to help you grow and become a better person. But, if you don't have that, the internet has plenty of form fields. Just type words into one of those. This week, The F Plus doesn't trust that 2 year old with the crack rocks.

Hi there, podcast listener. Today's episode is a blend of two topics. ThePayback.com, submitted by Cheapskate, and Complaints Board, submitted by Montreth. But just before we dig in, I want to tell you about two recent F plus E happenings you might not know about. The Wrongest Words is an internet card game

we started talking about in 1.15, and something I brought into GitHub and have been working on since then. The idea is that a group of players will each have one untrue statement displaying on their smartphone and would try to convince the group that the statement on their phone is the least incorrect. The project is currently

stalled out. The front end perspective of it I've got covered, but to make the thing work across devices, I'd need some back end knowledge I can't seem to muster. I'm almost positive this project would ideally be using Node.js and Socket.io for the server client communication,

and that makes sense because everything else is written in JavaScript, but I just can't seem to manage it. So, if you or somebody you know is handy with Node.js and wants to help, please contact me at Lemonette, the F+. I think it would be a fun game to make, but I need other people's skills to make it happen. So, the wrongest words, on hiatus until I can get a node programmer. There's that.

Secondly, AC Rockawaddle and Mantra have just started a new panel show thing called QE, or Quite Exasperating. Concept here is that panelists are given a poorly written phrase and have to guess the author's intent. QE episodes are recorded straight to YouTube, so you won't find them here in the podcast feed.

But if you want to watch the episode we've done, or you want to participate in the live recording, thehefpl.us. Okay, that's all. Now let's bring on the crazy people! By which I mean poor Dex and Stahl. You guys are getting ready! For the big payback!

The big payback. That's where I land. For the big payback. The big payback. I can do wheeling. I can do dealing. Yes, I can. But I don't do no damn squealing.

I can dig rapping. I'm ready. I can dig strapping. But I can't dig that backstabbing. Welcome to the F+. This is the podcast for Terrible Things, Reb Enthusiasm. We've got two different things we're reading tonight, and in the room we have Portax. On the Farmville two-game fireworks quest, I finally completed it and clicked get it for my new special goat.

Victor Laszlo. This is what cheap packaged wine and inbreeding will get you. Dog! A shelf that hangs off your neck with a chain? Who thought of this horrible idea? Don't use such a device. Bunny bread! One of the employees of your cleaning company had an affair with my wife

while working in our home to restore it. And lemon. Brown-complexion Nation of Islam Muslims are malicious organizations, and they shouldn't be allowed in any buildings and driving in the public. I'm Christian. Can somebody please tell me what's going on?

Probably not. Get back! Can somebody please tell me what's going on? Probably not. I've got to deal with you. Got to deal with you. Got to deal with you. I got to deal with you. Hey, let me tell you. Get down and look for my woman That ain't right You hollering and cussing

You wanna fight Look at ya Hey, F Plus Hello Hey, Lemon How are you guys doing? I am okay We're on the internet.

I'm happy, and I like people, and I don't want to wish harm on anyone. That's great, that's great. So how are your relationships just with humanity? Like, are you getting along with humans in general? Is everything, you know, good on that scale? I'm wishing nuclear fire on everyone. Well, that's okay. Yeah, sure, I did know that.

Stog, I have a site that might be very interesting to you. Especially if you like sites that are fucking ugly. So this site is called thepayback.com It is revenge at its best. Revenge at its best?

Well, I can't wait. I can't wait to get some good ideas from this website. So your colors are white and pink and black and, like, impact and tables. Oh, wow. I love the color tables. Yeah. Yeah. Tables is my favorite color.

I think this site is from 1995 or something. Yeah, no, it is. they've gone back in time. It is hideous, but that's okay because the content is really what carries this thing through. So thepayback.com is a site for tales of vengeance told from the revenger's

perspective, if I can invent a word right there. Also, it's the place where you can buy liquid ass. All right, so we're going to start things off here with Revenge Stories number 89. This site is a series of stories of revenge served, I guess, and I'm sure all of them are true, and all of the people that are writing probably come off, like, good. So, Portex, Revenge Story

number 89, please. Revenge Story number 89. I once made the mistake of dating a friend who should have stayed just a friend. I only went out with him as a desperate rebound anyway. He was cute and talented. He had long blonde hair and played the drums, which was

two things he was very proud of. I was proud of my grammars. My group Cobain cosplay is really coming into its own. After dating him for several months, I discovered that not only was he insanely jealous, terribly possessive, and excessively vain, but he was also

a violent alcoholic. You said he was a drummer, so why didn't that all come as a surprise? Well, you see, I was much younger then, so of course I was very gullible and naive. Why do you date a rebound for several months in the first place? Because I was too young to know what a rebound was, idiot. It's like that thing in basketball. Yes, Stog, that term is also used in basketball.

Very good, Stog. Now, Stog, tell me what the kitty says. He convinced me that I deserved all the bad things that he said and done to me. Finally, when he had mentally, physically, and emotionally used and abused me to the point where I could take no more, I got rid of his ass. What did you do with his dick? There's more to a guy than just an ass. Well, you know, that meat processing plant down the road, it's, you know, kind of there.

Weeks passed, and I would sit in my room alone at night, remembering and rethinking everything he said and did to me. I decided that if I was ever going to have any peace, I was going to have to get some revenge. It didn't take long for me to formulate a plan. Good.

Well, you are on a road to, like, mental health. This is going real well. Well, you know, you can't beat him, join him in crazy. I sat in my room stewing about my breakup for months until I realized I needed to inflict pain on another human being. Yeah, that's how it goes. And that's how my life got better. He's the crazy one.

Yeah. He harassed his ex-girlfriend the entire time I was dating him. He would prank call her house or drive by it and throw empty beer bottles at her drive-dash way. Each time he did something to her,

he would say, I'm going to wait about six months and go back and do something else. I'll never leave her alone. I guess that's where I got the idea. Six months? Sure. Looking back, I. I'll never leave her alone. I guess that's where I got the idea. Six months? Sure. Looking back, I should have known...

So every six months? Boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop. Click. Ha ha! I am evil! Well, your Google Calendar pops up and says, Reminder, tonight harass Allison. Looking back, I should have known something was terribly wrong with me.

When he said that, I decided to use his own tactic against him. Oh. Sure. He's wrong and crazy. Man, this is going real well. How long is this story? About six months after he was gone, a friend of mine moved into his neighborhood. I'll call my friend James.

James won him over by going out and drinking with him. James never told him that we were friends. Another friend of mine, whom I'll call Jay, helped James and Jenny, RJ, why would you, yeah, if you're gonna make up a name, you might as well make them different. Another guy who I'll call Jim. He helped James aid me in my plan of revenge.

The two of them took him out with a fifth of vodka I purchased for the mission. I called Jay's cell phone to check in with him. Put him out on a date with a fifth of vodka I purchased for the mission, I called Jay's cell phone to check in with him. Put him out on a date with a fifth of vodka. He is a drummer. I called Jay's cell phone to check in with him every half hour. The first time I called, I heard James tell him in the background,

hit it like you got a pair of nuts. Okay. I asked Jay if he had drank much. Jay laughed and replied, Yeah, about half the bottle's already gone. When he passed out in Jay's back seat, they brought his limp, drunken body and the empty bottle to my house. I met him with a shiny pair of sharp, polished scissors.

Oh, that's good. Waxed and buffed them. scissors. Oh, that's good. Waxed and buffed them. I whacked all his beautiful long blonde hair that he loved so much right off. Why didn't you just use the scissors?

Yeah. I put the shiny scissors down and grabbed my scythe. I cast a spell on him using his hair as the main ingredient. Okay. Which crippled him so badly that he'll never play drums or hit people again. Oh. Uh, no.

He could have been a really good player of drums or hitter. Also, I hate my dad. Eric, I hope you or someone you know reads this, you punk. Guess who? And the mod note. Wow, I'm kind of scared you know reads this, you punk. Guess who? And the mod note. Wow, I'm kind of scared. Crippling magic? Well, I guess he shouldn't have fuck-cut with you.

I have a bald head. Actually, two of them. Does that mean I'm safe? Thepayback.com. Ha ha ha ha ha. Fuck you. Yeah, just like, that's... Oh my god, that was... Spells.

Spells. I didn't expect spells to come up in Act 1. They should have... She should have bit some trees or something. Or did Dave Mustaine's killing spell. So, Bunnybread, you have two friends, right? No, no, I have one.

One and a half, maybe. No, no, I think you're wrong. I think you have two friends. This? No, no, I have one. One and a half, maybe. No, no, I think you're wrong. I think you have two friends. This is Revenge Story number 85. Oh, you're talking about those titties that I saw the other day. Those are my friends. No, I'm talking about ass and titties. Ass, ass, and titties. Oh, that would be three friends, sir. Ass and titties

work at the strip club as bouncers. Anyway, Revenge Story 85, you have two friends. Okay. Alright. Okay. Okay. You see, you have two friends. Okay. All right. Okay. You see, I have two friends. Sure. One of my friends liked the other, and then they started going out, right? You are a great storyteller!

So it growing pretty well, but the guy never touches the girl. Then one day, the guy comes to school and tells all of his friends they French kissed another girl. Oh boy. Okay. He tells all of his friends that those friends French kissed another girl. You guys did it. I swear to God. I saw you.

He totally made out with this chick. He sees his girlfriend coming and runs. I follow him afraid that she might kill anyone who tells her. So my friends do the bidding, but she doesn't believe them. And then she finally does. At lunch, he comes up to her and says, I'm sorry, but we can't

still be friends. Can you believe it? He didn't even tell her that he wanted to break up. I don't understand the things that I've already said. Somebody kissed somebody. Yeah, there was a French girl who kissed another bunch of French. Look, guys, teenagers tell the best stories, okay?

Then one day this girl comes to school and he tells all his friends that he French kissed another girl. He sees his French girlfriend coming and runs. See, that was really succinct and it made sense. Yeah. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, no. You're not going to be my editor. So, my group of friends divide and we start a war. Oh, no.

Not the Crimea again. Yep. Damn it. I am on her side, of course. So, we start planning revenge. Then first was to start going out with his best friends, which we didn't do. What the? Okay. So, we plan and then first was to start going out with his best friends which we didn't do what okay so so we plan and plan and we think of the perfect thing send 15 large pizzas four orders of bread

stick and one large coke to his house i'm gonna give him type 2 diabetes that is the worst oh my god yeah not two large cokes. So I recognize that you know, like maybe the guy that answers the phone at Papa John's isn't the brightest bulb. But you answer the phone and a teenager says, hi! We want 15 large

anchovy pizzas! Four orders of one breadstick! High five! Yeah! I'm pretty sure the orders of breadstick is like the code of contact that all breadsticks have to hold themselves up to. So you're just totally wrong. But then unfortunately, his side finds out.

His side. His side, the Jets. Alright, what's going to happen? This is going to be exciting. It will be. The outcome of this story is probably never going to be known. The end. This creepypasta sucks. All right, the outcome of this story is probably never going to be known.

It may go on forever. But I want to tell you this story and why you should tell your girlfriend You're breaking up with her And that you shouldn't cheat If anything else happens I'll be sure to tell you What the fuck I don't think you do tell us I'm gonna tell you something

There's a postscript here What I'm gonna give you an awesome update Wait a second Wait a second P.S. I forgot to mention I so wanted to get revenge I typed revenge plans in a search

And it came up with you So thank you very much And I hope there is more to this story I so wanted to get revenge. I typed revenge plans in a search, and it came up with you. So thank you very much, and I hope there is more to this story. I hope there is a story at some point. I think I read this as a serial in the Saturday Evening Post. Jesus. You could probably find this girl at her high school reunion based on the age of this website. So apparently nothing ever happened. Okay, okay, okay.

Alright, I think this is probably the way to go here. Stog, this is Revenge Story number 74. Revenge Story number 74. I live in a duplex with my landlady living in the other half. Revenge!

She has a 43-year-old deadbeat homeless son that used to live in my half prior to my occupancy. She kicked him out after he brought a live-in girlfriend home, hence the vacancy leaving my tenancy. So it's like, she followed me home from school, can I keep her? A little sicko, mommy dearest scenario. At any rate, this dude has never lived on his own. Lived in hotels with his GF after his eviction. She eventually dumped him, and he came back to live in mommy's half of the equation recently. Careless, homeless, sporadic employment.

You get the picture. All right. So, okay, good. We got it. We got it. You paint a picture. Good. Yeah.

Enter the harassment originating from the boy wonder. He wants his old unit back. Suffice it to say that I have an addy, and the cops warn him off from his highly illegal activities, and needless to say, I have an ironclad lease. I wonder what addy means in this context.

Maybe fatty? He left out the F. I have a fatty. I have a chub. I got a... I feel like, whoa, look at that erection. I just want to know why it's... He's using that tense.

People like this never go to college, nor pay their bills, nor process a change of addy with the USPS. Oh, he's trying to say addy as an address. Which addy? Then why is it spelled A-T-T? Whatever. That's fine. Attorney! I have had an attorney.

Oh, that makes sense. So you call up your lawyer and you say, Hey, addy, there's a guy harassing my addy. But it doesn't make any sense when you use that tense. I have had an attorney. I had an attorney once in the past. Well, no, that gives him legal expertise, the fact that he had an attorney at one point. And a public defender, yeah.

Yeah, exactly. All that means is you got arrested once. He has a cheering section of collection agency slash hyenas clawing at my door, trying to get him to pay up an aggregated debt of $10,000 he has not paid in six months or more. In addition, he has kindly provided In Addie.

In Addie edition. In addition, he has kindly provided his employer's name by placing fax calls to my home number to shrill in my ear. I'd love caller ID. Sure, so you know that it happened. Yeah.

But you already knew he was a scumbag like three paragraphs ago. Why are we still going on with this? Why don't you just change your number? So BW having laid this info in my lap, his collectors have now been provided with his mom's phone number, Addie, as well as his employer's. His employer's Addie. His Addie's Addie.

His Addie's Addie. His daddy's Addie. His baby Addie. I'm sorry, Miss Jackson. Since I now have his employer's fax line number, guess where his demands for payment are going. I believe he's being garnished soon. Yeah.

You said he doesn't have a job! No, he is being garnished. They are actually chopping his feet off. Yeah, that's what I was going to say. Covering him in celery. Every time I believe leave you alone, ask him for spare change. The tax man comes over.

How much you getting it today? Ooh, 75 cents. Well, this is worth it. Oh, excuse me. Another process server is ringing my bell. SBSN. That is the weirdest euphemism of getting a blowjob I

have ever heard. Your process server can ring my bell! Doesn't that just tell you, though, that your whole revenge scheme has failed if they're still ringing your doorbell? Jesus, does he understand what this site is? It's just

bitch.com. Shitgonewrong.com. All right, guys, I want to bring you revenge story number 71. Yo, what's up? Yo, what's up? That's how my thing starts. It's a period, not a question mark. Yo, what's up?

You've got a rocking site, and I'm all about revenge. Whenever some kid pisses me off, I get him back tenfold. Oh, does that mean... Payback 360, I didn't know it was you, baby! Does that mean you smother him with your fat folds? Is that what it is? Yes, I get him back with all tenfold. People piss me off when they fake their chivos.

There was this kid who I played tennis with, and he was a total jerk-off. He thought he was hot shit and was always talking trash. One night, I saw him out in my neighborhood, and the kid had the audacity to throw an egg at me. After chasing him down and beating his ass, I decided he needed a little something extra to think about.

Great. All right, here we go. I'm a good guy. I'd like to imagine it's two guys playing tennis, but they still have the Xbox headsets on, calling each other names and stuff. You fucking suck, dickbag. Hey, wait, wait for the lag. You'll catch it in a second. First, we cracked his voice mailbox on his pager

and changed the pin number, so he could no longer get on ChangeStuff. ChangeStuff.edu is my favorite. Dude, that's cold. We also changed the greeting. Hi, this is Michael. I'm currently single, looking for boys age 12 to 42 who want to experiment.

Well, the kid's parents were a little surprised, and so were the rest of his friends. The funny thing was that he couldn't change the message since we were the only ones who knew his new pin. A lot of times, the default pin, the number for pager VMBs, is the last four digits of the pager number. Congratulations.

Got him? Second, and this is hardcore and really hard to do, we started messing with his home phones. We pissed on him. It was real hard to do. There were five people in his family and three of those were teenagers,

so you know the phone was always being used. So it pissed on the teenagers! Yeah, this is my stand-up routine I'm working on. I got this joke from Ray Romano. Anyway, all phones have something called a line class code. This is like a phone freaker.

All these little details are convincing me that this story is real. So if you punch in the right series of numbers, you can blow up anyone's phone on the other line. Or you can order the delicious pizza. And if you say the secret password into the dial tone, you call the president. And he has to do whatever you say. And if you ask him if he's the president, he has to tell you the truth. You know that.

For instance, a home phone will be designated so and the account will be billed when a phone call is made from that address. I just social engineered my way through the phone company. And now I'm the president.

He is such a script kitty. Phone company, social engineer my way. And had his line class code changed to that of a pay phone. Basically, every time somebody tried to make a phone call from home, he would hear a voice that said, please deposit 35 cents.

This story is so old. Please deposit. First of all, pay phones existing. Secondly, 35 cents? Where in the hell do you put 35 cents into a damn portable phone? Good, huh? You like that story? Good. All right.

Are you going to tell us about the time you downloaded a program for AOL and used it to totally freak out everyone in the chat room? Are you going to tell us about a hamster dance? Sign him up for 30 free trials. Okay, so, third, I called the phone company's residential billing department and pretend to be his dad. Parentheses, social engineering, parentheses. So, therefore, legally, I was his dad.

I owned him. You're so sad. I am level 35, social engineering, parentheses. Therefore, legally, I was his dad. I owned him. You're so sad. I am level 35 in social engineering. I told them that people were messing with the phones and that I wanted to put a passcode on the account so that he was the only one who could make changes. The password was pancakes. And I am thinking that it took him a long time to convince the company

that he never made the password pancakes, that stupid fat ass. Because everybody knows he loves pancakes. Then everyone at the phone company was like, oh, that dude's so fat, he made the password pancakes. Let's put out a memo about how this guy changed his password to pancakes. memo about how the God changed the path for the pancakes. The kid learned his lesson, most likely, and I hope this is a good enough story

for you later. Yeah. It wasn't a good enough story for us. So he learned his lesson. What did he do later? How did this all start again? He threw an egg. He threw an egg. So he had a deathly fear of eggs. And he didn't realize that he threw an egg at phone master.

Yeah. Yeah. Oh. Victor, will you bring us... This is Revenge Story 47. Revenge Story 47. One of my favorites. In high school, everyone thinks that the boyfriend they are dating is the love of their life and the best friend

is forever. Not! Oh, shit. Take that, high schoolers. I want to know where this post actually lies in the Wayne's World FaceTime continuum. My so-called best friend was sleeping with my boyfriend behind my

back. Don't turn around! Don't turn around! Wait, no, no, it's a surprise. I bought you, like, some flowers. We're working on your birthday present. Don't turn around, you'll wake the puppies. The pain was so deep that I couldn't really do anything to pay both of them back and make it go away. After both of them denying it, I finally caught them. I said, forgive and forget.

Yay! I said, fuck that. I baked a chocolate cake for her birthday three months later and gave it to her at work, a restaurant she worked at right up the road from where I worked. It's a detail that was important. It'll come up later. It was filled with chocolate X-Lax, and she shared it with everyone that worked there. In the middle of lunch rush, everyone had the runs, fighting for the bathroom,

shitting all over themselves. Fountains. It was a sweet revenge until the older ladies got taken to the hospital because of dehydration. Oh, good job, asshole. Yay! You killed some old women.

I got six months probation for that and dropped the boyfriend. It shattered his world to this day, 15 years later. How do you know? Do you still talk to him? Hey! Still shattered? Quit calling me every single day!

He just sits in the corner, rocking back and forth, repeating X-Lax over and over. Can't sleep, she's gotta call me. Can't sleep, she's gotta call me. I remember the day that my life was turned into a shitty teen comedy. It was

worth every minute spent on probation. She paid for costs by new windshield wipers, and it's amazing what mothballs in a gas tank will do. What the fuck? There is no trace, and it's amazing what mothballs in a gas tank will do. What the fuck? There is no trace, and it's like a virus. Once it's infected, you spend so much

money fixing it, and every time you put a new part on it and you crank your car well again, it has the virus and never works again. Wait, so I knew that this site was old, but cranking your car? Yeah. So this post was from the 1912s?

This is a website from back to the future, I guess. Okay. Portex. We're just going back in time. Are there more stories where we kill old ladies? Probably. I mean, I think this site could really be called Are there more stories where we kill old ladies? Probably. Probably.

I mean, I think this site could really be called disproportionatesresponse.com. Yeah. So this is revenge story number 35. I had a teenage neighbor who used to baby minus it for my husband and me until I found out she was doing drugs. Okay. The baby, of course. Yeah.

I think that's the babysitter's fault, really. If you're babysitting a child and the child's doing drugs, I think that's on you. The baby introduced the babysitter to this kind of shit. The babysitter was doing really well until then. What are you, chicken? Now just try it. Try it.

Try it. Try it, Melissa. You like it. Yay it. Try it. Try it, Melissa. You like it. Yay! You do meth. Yay, meth! Yay! You like it.

You run around now. You run around like me. We run around. Yay! Best friends. Oh my God. I love baby drug pusher! Anyway...

Yeah, so baby drug pusher. Or wait, what's happening? Baby drug pusher. When we found this out, we no longer asked her to babysit. I told a neighbor friend who told her mother. When her mother came asking, I told her yes, I believed her daughter was doing drugs.

Apparently this upset her daughter. I wonder why. I don't. My husband's car was smeared with peanut butter and my car was keyed. We also received about ten prank calls a day. We blamed our infant daughter. Well, I got real upset

When I started hearing that she was spreading rumors About What? I tried to warn her but she would not listen So she had to learn the hard way I would call every day at her job Claiming to be her mother And ask for her

Had several friends claim they saw her spitting someone's food She worked in a large fast food chain. She wound up fired. So, like, I'm like 35. I'm pranking the shit out of a teenager. Yep. Okay. And bragging about it on the internet.

Yep. Yep. Yep. I then spread the rumor that the reason she no longer babysat was that my husband and I caught her making out with a female friend in our house. Wait a minute. If she was doing... Yeah. Okay.

She was doing drugs. Yep. You could have just said she was doing drugs. Yeah, she was doing drugs. No, no, no. She was gay. Yeah, she was gay. That's like way worse.

Yeah. The thing about that is... Yeah. Way worse. Yeah, the thing about that is... Someone, I wonder who, left tire tracks under her car tires. What the hell? Tire tax.

Tire tax. Tire tax. Oh, okay. Tire tax, which is also a thing. She's just dropping fucking caltrops all over her house. She's just selling this At the auto parts store. Oh yeah, we got these from the Viet Cong. I don't know.

I never thought we'd sell them, to be honest. But yeah, sure, you can take them. And every time I saw her out of school, I would call her school and let them know she was cutting. Classes are herself. I also hooked up my video camera and caught her on tape keying my husband's car. She paid dearly.

I also caught her on film making out with another boy and sent a copy to her boyfriend. What? What the fuck? Needless to say. Fuck. What is wrong with you? You crazy bitch. You're following a teenager around with a video camera filming her making out

with people? I'm pretty sure that's a felony. Doesn't that ruin your lesbian story from before? So, okay, I so, okay, I got her fired from her job because I found peanut butter on my car. Yep. Yep. Mm-hmm. Yep. No need us to

say I won and we haven't heard from her since. Great job, asshole. No, you didn't win. we haven't heard from her since. Great job, asshole. No, you didn't win. You didn't win. You lose. No, see, look at the editor note. Yeah. Wow, don't mess with a pro.

This story is kind of like Rocky IV when Rocky comes out of retirement to fight the Russian who killed Apollo. Except Rocky didn't come out of retirement. He was still the champ. The Russian really didn't do anything wrong. Oh, my God. he was still the champ. The Russian really didn't do anything wrong. Rocky didn't throw in the towel to save Apollo. And there is no mention of revenge or a babysitter in the entire movie. Whatever.

Go rent it and judge for yourself. Thanks for the great story. I took peyote and watched Rocky IV today, can you tell? Yeah, he's the best boy on Rocky IV. Guaranteed. Oh my god, okay. Jesus, what a fucking turd and a fucking bun.

You okay, Stog? Yeah, I'm fine. You wanna get revenge on her? Nah, she's already got revenge on herself by posting this shit on this website. That's true. Well, if we ever find Miss Number 35, we'll totally figure out who did it. All right. So, yeah, that goes on for hundreds and hundreds of stories of just small people exacting their small revenge. And we could continue on that.

But, frankly, that would get depressing. So let's move away from that and to another place where angry idiots collect. This is Complaints Board. It is made by the people for the people. Or by some people for some people. Made by the people for us. This is a place, you know,

slightly different than our previous site. This is rather than somebody having a problem with somebody and exacting their revenge and bragging about it. This website, posting on it is the revenge. This is somebody that calls somebody out for being a meanie head. So we're going to start out with a post about Jeremy London, famous actor. So, Victor, you're SK Publishing, and will you tell us about Jeremy London, famous actor? You've got a problem with him?

Yeah, I do. Okay. Famous actor Jeremy London, who was the start of the Kevin Smith movie Mallrats, and also several TV shows, including 7th Heaven, had entered in a publishing contract to release a book that would be loosely based on his life. Kevin Smith? Where does the line start? A guy that was in Mallrats and Party of Five!

I need that book now! He was paid approximately $450 as an advance. Holy shit! Big number! Big fucking number! That's some Stephen King money right there. He not only has never delivered a book, but he has also admitted that he couldn't do the book and would pay back Sakura Publishing.

Okay. To date, not one penny has been sent to Sakura Publishing. Just because this guy is famous, he thinks he can get away with ripping off companies. I feel like we have different versions of the word famous. We would love to see people realize what kind of dishonest person he is. We hope that he will realize he can't get away with this. Furthermore, he will be brought to court for failure to pay back this money,

and we will make it our prime mission in life to make sure his reputation suffers for his unbelievably ignorant and heinous actions. Oh, no! Look out, Jeremy London! You might not get as many acting roles anymore! Like, so he sends in his resume, and they're like, well, according to Compl complaintsboard.com...

You stiffed Sakura Publishing for... yeah, I'm sorry, sir. Who would have thought that the owner of a company called Sakura Publishing would be a lunatic? Look, Sakura Publishing's got some powerful, powerful friends, alright? They have, like, that guy that was, you know, Soldier No. 5 from Battlestar Galactica. They got chemical monsters. Famous actors. So, Portax, you've got a problem with Barnes and Nobles. Barnes and Nobles, which is different than...

Oh, fuck! Oh, fuck! I hate farmers and royalty. So what's... Oh, I wanted to... This is... Fuck. You really want it? You want it? No, no, no. I just finally remember something that I looked up beforehand. I'm amazed. I actually did any research.

Please, Portex, treat it with care. So, Portex, this is Barnes and Nobles. Your name is Worker for Hire. H-I-G-H. Yeah, and I'm... Well, this is going to surprise y'all, but I'm from Alabama. Sure. And I hate Barnes and Nobles.

Wait, you're from Alabama and you have problems with spelling? I've been filling out applications every month, sometimes two a month for two years in Finley Spowak to the manager. I love the application mountains.

That's where I'm from. Every month, sometimes two a month for two years in Finley SPOAC to the manager, and he said that he is waiting for some man to lose his job as a teacher at the University of Alabama, and he would hire them back at Barnes & Noble. He said he asks his friends if they want a job, won't a job, and they hive him a stack of applications and hires them.

What about me? That's not right. No, no, girl. No. It ain't right. English ain't right. It should form to ye. Also, I have some comments I need to read.

The comments are all from me, pretty much. I need to read. The comments are all from me, pretty much. No. First come, not save a job. If someone has a job they can lose, then they don't need one. Tud. Holy crap. Tud Kaluda.

Tud Kaluda, Alabama, Barnes & Noble's employees have bad worth. Eat Hicks. Eat Hicks over there. I'm kind of scared. There's nobody left. I've got to respond to myself. Tuscaloosa, Alabama. Oh, okay.

Yeah. Oh, so not Tuscaloosa. I think you're one spelling mistake. Also, addendum, addendum, city boy. Yeah, what? Barnes and Nobles are big-gig-gig-gigs. They're actually two pages of this. They're bigger than your standard business.

Now, wait a minute, wait a minute now. Saving jobs for university teachers that can't teach and lose their job. That's messed up. Waiting for two years, Barnes & Noble steals their NRB giga-gated. Can I be Foxy Grandma? Yeah, take Foxy Grandma. Your biggest problem is probably your spelling, punctuation, grammar, and then your attitude. How do you think all of your posts will help you get a job?

I have had many people tell me that it is really hard to get hired by Barnes & Noble. You going in several times a month to apply is a form of harassment. Wait, what? If you need a job so badly, apply someplace else. When you need work, you can't just count on one place that you keep applying. You have to apply different places, and if you unemployed, you have to make finding a job

your current job. That means spending eight hours a day looking for work. Portex, you have a response to that. Yes. Yes. All right. Barnes and Nobles is a hanky-panky store. Okay, now I really like this

William Faulkner novel. That's a pretty good song lyric, really. I don't know if she's just coming up with good shit to say. Alright, so this is... Oh man, there's so many people that need to be complained about. Including the Attorney General of Pennsylvania. Bunnybrite, if you'll take the post by Commonwealth of PA conclusion.

Yes. Attention, Attorney General of Pennsylvania. Attention, Agent John Dunn. Attorney General of Pennsylvania, Attention Agent John Dunn, in the case with Commonwealth of Pennsylvania V... D. Well, it ain't happening.

Wait, so the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania versus D. Yeah, the concept of whether... Shit, yeah, you know D-Man. You know D. We're suing D. D, the sarcastic sister you are... Shit, yeah, you know, D-Man. You know D. We're suing D. D, the sarcastic sister from What's Happening? John Dunn, I think you, Penn Foster, and Judge Paul J. Ware out of Dunmore, PA, are also Dunn.

Dunn, Dunn, Dunn! Or Dunn, diggity, Dunn, Dunn, Dunn. This goes for Human Relations Commission in Harrisburg, as well for Martin Kearney, Alan Kiel, Judge Paul Jouer, What is happening? Russell Day,

Larry Pierce! Take a long, cold shower because it's happening! Signed, not guilty! That's my name, legally speaking. Not guilty, I'm immune. So can this be taken to court as a legal breach? I'm pretty sure, yeah.

Is this admissible? Yeah. Your Honor, it turns out he's not guilty. Sorry. He called dibs on being not guilty Johnny Tsunami's like slapping himself on the forehead going, oh shit, why didn't I think of that? Okay

So apparently a site called fakecopy I-E-L-T-S dot blogspot.com is not real. Apparently it's a scam. So hard to...

Stog, stog, if you complain about fake cop... fake cop yields? Fake cop... I have no idea. My name is JD3 HTTP colon forward slash forward slash fakecopy stop blog spot.com rip off no oh no you sound pretty my yield scores were very bad so i found a site http colon

forward slash forward slash fake copy yield stop blogspot.com, whereas they promised they could change my score and provide ETS website validation. It all turned out to be one huge scam, whereas this site is not only a scam, it is not real in the first place. Wait, so, you know how you can tell

a site doesn't exist? I'm gonna ask WikiHow right now. Detected samples seem to be stolen off of Superior Esol. My fault, however, as the sample wasn't dead, giveaways. I should have paid attention and said Superior Esol. I should have paid attention and said Superior Esau. What? Jesus.

Dab site equals HTTP. Oh no! Colon. Oh no. Fakecopy yields dot blogspot dot com. Fakecopy yields

at gmail dot com. Thank you. You're.com Thank you. You're welcome. Thank you. You're so welcome. Have you ever heard that Penn Foster is a good school? Yeah, oh my god. Have you heard that?

All the time. So my name's not a good school! And this is a post about Penn Foster. I would have named you a good school if I were your parents. That's not a good school oh and this is a post about fortunate this is a post about pen i would have named you a good school if i were your parents that's not a good school this complaint is in regards to pen foster a so-called good school however their director of education chairperson director of the education chairperson person who directs the education chairperson all right anyway that guy russell day repeatedly asked me of asking repeated personal questions to the instructors,

which was a total lie. He instigated that I had been asking personal questions to the instructors and repeatedly tried to threaten me to quit on my own. My contract is in good standing, and I have no violation towards what the contract states. I am halfway through the course, which I started back in April of 2012, but this Russell Day! Before we go any further, this Russell Day, I think we're having a crossover. If you go back to the PA, the Attorney General of Pennsylvania,

this goes for Human Relations Commission in Harrisburg, PA, the Attorney General of Pennsylvania. This goes for Human Relations Commission in Harrisburg, PA, as well as Martin Kearney, Al McKeel, Judge Peeble, Russell Day, and Larry Pierce. Do you think Commonwealth of PA conclusion and not a good school are friends with each other? I don't think so. Unlikely. Pennsylvania's pretty big, especially the crazy ward. But this Russell Day is trying to bunk me off the course so that he can put my account on collections and extort money from me. This school is a scam, a fraud, and does not allow you to finish the course.

and does not allow you to finish the course. Even before you have started the course and want to ask questions to the instructors, they will falsely accuse you of not asking the right question and try to instigate you. Oh, my God. I feel like I took a course in women's studies, so is your pussy wet is a valid question. Yeah.

I'm studying the women's. Bitches be crazy, am I right? is a valid question. Yeah. I'm studying the women's. I ran the college. Bitches be crazy, am I right? According to my contract, I am in good standing, and my grade point average a 3.0. But we, we, but we need, ever, I ask this stupid

Russell J. guy, he act like a big snob, and says that I am not asking the right questions. And so therefore, I should not be allowed to complete the course. He did this repeatedly. Every time I asked him any questions which were all course related, the school is a total scam. And this guy, Russell J. Well, I don't have any comments i am going to complete the court i have no comments i've just i got nothing to say you know if you can't say nothing nice i'm just gonna model it won't hear a word i'm going on to complete the

course and if they still accuse me falsely then try to not let me complete my course and forces my account to collections, then I can take them to court for false accusations. Then they can take me to court for false accusations, which does not pertain to my contract, and also for extortion

for collecting money from me. Yeah. for collecting money from me. What a landmark Supreme Court case that would be if collections was considered extortion. Putting on collections. And then not giving me the diploma even after finishing the course in time and also making payments on time,

of which I have recorded everything. So for all of those that are going to this school, take caution, and for those thinking about it, don't! You'll be sorry! Angry! Sorry and angry, sorry or angry.

So anyway, Victor, you are Pen Foster and Judge Ware Beware. Judge Ware Beware. It's a Nintendo Wii game. Pen Foster and Judge Ware Beware! Oh, okay, I thought it was Ware Beware. To Pen Foster and this man. This is what I have to say to that. Shut up!

This school is filled with criminals that victimized me! Yay, victim! I do not have to explain any further! So to Pen Foster and a crooked judge Paul J. Ware out of some backwards country in the state of Pa.

Pack your bags and leave me alone. You cannot mess with me or my information or my life, you bunch of criminals. I think they can actually. They clearly can fuck you up pretty well. To this man, why don't you keep

your point of view to yourself and go educate yourself somewhere else? All I know is that Iz was scammed, abused, and falsely accused, and also false charges were forced on me by the above-mentioned people. I don't know which people those are. There's been a lot of caps. I owe no one anything, especially to a bunch of nitwit crooks. So you this-men keep your comments to yourself, and so can anyone else that has anything to say. This is actually, like, if you had the right drum beat,

this could be a system of down song right now. This is what I have to say to that? Shut up! Don't call me a crook! You've idolized me! As for Judge Paul J. Ware, a crook that has committed false summons, cheated on his wife, and supports drug dealers and prostitutes, and also involved in racketeering, gambling, and as for Russell Day, Corinne Linzer, and Larry Pierce, go take a hike.

Go take a hike. Do not send me any summons. You can shove it up you know where, and do not charge me for a fine i do not owe okay think if it's a fine you actually owe it that's how fines work and i sent that stupid pink slip back to that criminal judge paul j where out of dunmore pa so after today november 21st all this issue with Penn Foster and Russell

Day Larry Pearson judge Paul J Ware is over and closed with me being not guilty judges can be impeached I read somewhere I think it was in one of my earlier posts hang on

yup there it is I think it was in one of my earlier posts. Hang on. Yep, there it is. It's black and white. Jewages can be impatched. So says me. All right. So, boy, that was, oh, that was pretty much the third season of The Wire right there. Jesus Christ.

Let's move away from all this political intrigue, because it was very confusing, to a subject that I think we can all relate to a little bit better. Subway. Portex, will you bring up your complaint about Subway, please? Yes. How would you have a complaint about Subway? My name is Beware of Ugly Fat Women in Orlando.

Well, I hate Ugly Fat Women in Orlando. Love Subway. Next time, I get to name our kid. Look, it's a family name. My grandfather was named Beware of Ugly Fat Women in Orlando. You guys are making fun of it, but that's good advice. Fair enough.

I guess I don't run into Ugly Fat Women in Orlando that often, so I don't need to beware of them. You don't pick up chicks at Disney World? What the fuck's wrong with you, man? And my grievance with the Subway franchise is that it has abusive, stupid, rude, ugly, fat, retarded

employees. Oh, that makes sense. Alright. So I'm not going to read all this because it is quite a thesis. Yeah, it certainly is. This is a horrible Subway place. Most Subways are, yes a thesis. Yeah, it certainly is. This is a horrible subway place. Most subways are, yes, employed by rude mean jerks. They are nice to you if you are ugly or average, but if you're attractive, these pathetic fed hooligans will abuse you to no end.

Now, every time I go to the subway, the ugly white tersa workers are rude to me, pick on me, pretend they can't hear me, abusive to me. I am really sick of ugly, fat idiots and losers in the sick city of Orlando abusing attractive women. Oh, that's how it works! Alright! It's pretty people

abuse. Man, if only there was a place in Florida for models. Look, this is fat privilege. You guys, you know. Oh, sure, fair enough. There was this huge, fat, ugly hippo female working in their huge, ugly stank white trash. This disgusting

fat hippo blob came to finally make my order and then took out the people behind me's order again. I mean, WTF? She couldn't just make my simple order and let it go. This ugly hippo had to keep trying to help the other people and ignore me, which was a nightmare.

I tried to tell the ugly, rude, mean, pathetic, evil elephant, Biffucktee, to not touch the other order because it had bacon and I didn't want her having a change of gloves again. The ugly, evil hippo again made me repeat myself several times

and every time i said i wanted something repeat yourself fucking repeat yourself this crazy said you want tomato you want tomato i mean this fat cow was nuts this fat smelly cow basically made me repeat myself several times then literally i had to say yes to her constant reassuring what I wanted, which was crazy and ridiculous. Finally, the ugly fat pile, the shafakti, finally got done with my order and was so The subway location is starting to sound like a Jim Jarmusch movie. These apes, I'm not kidding, just enjoy abusing beautiful women for no reason, discriminating against them, belittling them, and forcing them to get angry or erratic by constantly

degrading them. Even the rude, ugly, white, freak loser male was staring at me funny. I mean, really? These are hideous, ugly people, and they are looking at me as if I'm weird and also treating me terribly. I mean, why are ugly people these days picking on

and bullying normal, pretty people? These are the rudest subway lunatics to exist. Horrible, sick people. The subway at this place is the worst. Oh my god. I think she woke up in that Twilight Zone episode. Everyone's a pig but her. Every place is a subway?

Oh, okay. Yeah, or that one. You idiot. People in the city of Orlando esp food workers at Subway are evil, rude, pathetic, and worse. They are butt-ugly weird and mistreat and discriminate against pretty women for fun, abuse, and treat them and mistreat them.

Wait, hang on. What's your central point to this post? I haven't figured it out yet. Okay, well, so they see me, pretty woman, and they instantly are jealous, and if I say I want this, they will say, What? What? Brutally, and then you repeat yourself,

and they say, What? What? Wait, wait, and then you repeat yourself, and they say, what? What? Is she pretty and also deaf? I mean, like, is it not coming through correctly? Yeah, no. Because I'm sending out like pretty telepathy rays, and they're not getting it. Oh, got it. Pretty telepathy. This is like, if anyone ever... Because they can only understand ugly

telepathy, because they're ugly and fat and shitty and lizards and apes. If anyone ever wanted to know what it's like to hang out with Fergie, this is pretty much an example. This person hasn't pissed themselves yet. This is what ugly people do

to pretty people all the time in the horrible city of Orlando where there are so many ugly women. You have no clue. Fat, ugly, backwards, white, trash women everywhere and they hate pretty women. I hope the manager of this awful place reads this and teaches their disgusting employees to not abuse women or anyone just because their ugly selves are jealous or have issues. Shame on these warp-sick, ugly, pathetic losers.

My name is Movie Man Forever. My name is Movie Man Forever. If a simple transaction at Subway results in your generating text that is better suited for a therapist, you need to get some help with your mental instability. What? We don't want to read your ranting. You sound delusional.

Find a psychotherapist and start seeing them immediately. By the way, we don't want to read your ranting. That's why we come to ComplaintsBoard.com. Wait, I see my psychiatrist? You want me to fuck my psychiatrist? Oh my god, stop shaming me. I don't know, is your psychiatrist, like, part of your genetic master race

that you belong to? Maybe. It's hard to tell seeing as I'm apparently just a woman made of fingers that just kind of rolled all over the keyboard. Stog, is that I'm apparently just a woman made of fingers that just kind of rolled all over the keyboard in this game. Stog, you have what might be a complaint or maybe it's life advice. Your name is Umho?

December 30th, 2012. My son, an 18-year D college student shelled out $200 for Obey Your Body and Deja Vu products by rather sketchy Middle Eastern salespeople as a gift for me. You can purchase these items for less than $80 online at Amazon. Motors at half mass, dog. We were almost home when he revealed the cost to me. We live in Staten Island. And once home, I researched the product online

and was shocked at the original cost. Has anyone had this experience in this area as well? Maybe? I'm not sure. No, never. I wish I would have gone back to return, but I don't have the time.

Plus, I broke the jar of body butter. And already used the scrub. I have the receipts. Buyer, beware. Okay. We should close it out here. Portex, which of these things do you find most

frustrating? The suicide hotline in Orlando. Oh, dear. How many times have you tried to kill yourself in Orlando, Vortex? Door number three. Farmville 2. Or Walmart Canada. Let's see.

I guess we'll do Walmart Canada. Walmart Canada. I think that might have been the best choice. Yeah. So Walmart Canada. You are Blue Eyes Mama. You're from... Blue Eyes Mama.

British Columbia. This is about Walmart Canada. All right. And attacked my jealous employees. So my employees were jealous of Walmart Canada's success, and they were destroyed. I went in tonight to make a return to your store, and I was treated very poorly. I almost refused to return my $14 item without a receipt. I am very aware Walmart does make returns

without receipt. Therefore, unless it is an expensive item, I rarely keep the receipt. I must spend at least $200 or $300 a week in this store. And the item that I returned tonight, I purchased a few days before from the assistant manager himself till number 18. The other females

there stated to the manager on duty tonight that I was always make returns without receipt. It should not matter if your store takes things back without a receipt. Then it's not my fault. It seems as though this store and the employees just plain don't like me personally. The way they acted is as though I had stole the item. I told her, check the camera. I'll wait.

I'll say, check it tonight. And two, three. camera. I'll wait. I'll say, check it tonight in two, three... This is all one sentence? Keep going! Okay. And two days before I bought it at till no 18, I guess she

realized I wasn't guilty and then said no, she will return it this time, but if I ever try to return anything in the future, she will refuse while I'm ready to take action against the store for the way I was treated! Yeah! That's the sentence.

The one thing I capitalized. Why? Customers should have every bit of respect for their customers. Customers should have every bit of respect for their... Customers. Oh, are you a customer? I'm a customer, too! Oh my god!

I should totally respect you! We're all customers under the eyes of God, alright? And the people working there have only showed a lack of it today. and the people working there have only showed a lack of it today 12 12-14-12 just before 21-04-17 that's the time

I also have had previous incidents where a bottle of nail polish broke in my hand while flipping it which just fucking shattered just blew up she's like scanners for that shit this nail polish is defective when I throw it on the ground. Some real David Cronenberg shit. And another when I bought some food and then I came home,

the gallon of milk that was bagged had ripped and fell and exploded all over the interior of my car. A lot of shit explodes around you. You notice that? Michael Bay is just fucking with her at this point. When I called to complain, I was told that it was my fault that I did not ask the cashier to double bag the milk. I've been there

and their cashiers have thrown the items into the bag when a necessary force, therefore destroying the boxes and bread shaking up the two liter bottles. Since the store has opened, I have been shopping there and have had many incidents. I find people

there are very rude and have no knowledge. Also, I just want to point out, every instance of there is T-H-E-I-R. It's never the right there. You know, throw that out there. It's there. Throwing that out there, I mean throwing that T-H-E-I-R. Oh no, it's exploding!

I have also been in the store and it is cluttered with boxes blocking every aisle making it a very big fire hazard and impossible to get around this store. I have pictures to prove this from a trip I made over the summer. I was just so stunned and amazed I had to get pictures. I will be looking into getting a lawyer.

I'm very fed up with this story. God, if only there was another store in Canada. What's the sort of foundation of your case that you're going to get a lawyer for? Every time I go to Walmart, things explode? Here's the sort of foundation of your case that you're going to get a lawyer for? Every time I go to Walmart, things explode? Well, here's the thing. I'm explaining.

Stop being a rude guy over there. Oh, God, I'm so sorry. That's the last thing I want to be to you. You just got yourself added to the lawsuit, asshole. Damn it! Now I'll have to get an Addy. I hate the F+, every time I listen to that podcast, They always say a thing that doesn't make sense, baby. My iPod exploded.

Fuck you, F+. That's on your tagline. Why do I think it is something against me personally? I go to the store two, three times a week. In most cases, I spend between $100 and $150 each time I am a white mix.

Okay, open and shut case right there. That's pretty good. Well, the thing is, I'm a white 30-year-old female mother of two, well-kept, always dressed up and having nice designer bags, nails always done. I was getting complimented on my nails just prior to the incident, and the females noticed. The females. We're females. I can see where this is going. My cloths are always put together.

I prefer to pay with cash, so I always have lots of money in my wallet and have seen the cashiers look at the amount of money I have when I pay, and my husband as well. The people that work there know me and my husband, and I am very friendly with everyone at the store that my husband always parks up front, so a lot of employees have seen I have a luxury stuff. Also they noticed that my airbrush t-shirt says classy bitch

on it. I take out all my money from my wallet and I count it all just to make sure I have enough. Also I'm spending $150 at Walmart. Like oh yeah I'm big ballin'.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Way to the Walmart over here. Pick up my Louis Vuitton purse. These three females just plain do not like me because I am not in their shoes. I do not apologize for my Fortunet life. Jesus Christ. And should not be treated like dirt because they hate theirs or me. I have photos from my visit on the summer.

You can see that Firefox fucked up just now. One moment. So, yeah, I don't want to wish people ill, but you know, I look forward to the day that your husband divorces you because you are a shitty person. Hey, F+, what did we learn

from both of these sites? What did we learn from these people? The thing I learned is that apparently there is this mass conspiracy against rich, pretty people. There does seem to be that going on, yeah. We need to band together with our ugly brothers and sisters

and fight. I think. I don't have to acknowledge you people. Honey bread! You're so mean to me! I can't hear you. You're trying. Yeah, I will say that the complaints board people,

I mean, Blue Eyes Mama, for example, is just a shit human being. But, I mean, the complaints board people are much, I mean, they're definitely more likable than the revenge people because, like, at least posting on a website the shit that bothers you is, like, you know, impotent and stupid, and so you're not actually causing people misery.

So that makes you better. But I'm not sure any of the revenge board people were causing people misery either. What about ordering me some pizza? I like pizza. Thanks for the pizza, dumbass. Well, you know what I learned? What's that? http://greatcoffeeelts.blogspot.com

is a ripoff, and you probably shouldn't go there. He's got a point. Prove him wrong. Yeah, that's right. I, uh... I... I'm prone to anger in my life. What? No.

Yeah, I know. Is that what you learned from this episode? Well, if we're revealing things, I'm prone to fucking chicks. I like cartoons. If we're all sharing. Yeah, so I get angry at things, and I bitch about them, and then I shut up. But there's an element of, I mean, to these people, they're just holding on to this to an extent that, but, but like, there's, there's an element of, I mean, to these people, I mean, they're just holding onto this to an extent that like, like where they should, like they, they, they want, like they're, they're forcing themselves to hold onto it.

Like, like they could forget about things. They could move on with their lives, but they're really insistent on like making sure that they like maintain their stupid anger as though it's, like, some sort of justice. That's all they got. Well, that's what internet people do, is they think, okay, the worst thing I could possibly do to a person is talk weird shit about them on the internet. And, like, night and night. On a website they'll never go to. At least half of the time, it's revenge for someone not even doing something wrong.

So it'll just be someone saying, hey, you know, you got some ketchup on your shirt there and your fly's undone. Oh my god, I'm going to tell the entire internet that you killed a pig and fucked its snout.

Because, I mean, it's only fair, right? You told me my fly was undone, so I mean, you know, potato patater. So it's weird, like I, I mean, it's only fair, right? You told me my fly was undone, so I mean, you know, potato patater. So it's weird, like, you know, because the readership, I mean, the people that are going here,

I mean, you know, I mean, unless it's the original poster commenting on its own shit, there's not really comments on stuff. So I don't know why other people want to go to this other than just, like, you know, an actor realizing... Yeah, I thought like the only thing sadder is these people that are hanging on to their bitter, bitter anger.

The fucking weirdos that are going to this and going, yeah, yeah, tell me about how you ordered 15 pizzas. Yeah, yeah. Those people aren't even like doing anything. They're just beating off to the worst revenge ever. Yeah. Which is weird. Can we close this out, Victor? Are you on a complaints board page right now? They're just beating off to the worst revenge ever, which is weird.

Can we close this out? Victor, are you on a complaints board page right now? I am. So will you scroll down to the very bottom of the complaints board page, and what does it say right underneath post your comment? Underneath post your comment. Yeah, there's a line of text that's right underneath post your comment. Please check text spelling before submitting a comment.

I'll try. I'm making it no promises. I am very busy complaining about things, okay? I don't have time to check my spelling. The other thing I've learned from this episode is that people ignore rules. The website's thefpl.us. Our first half of the section was brought to you by Cheapskates.

Montreth brought us the second half. Go to Ball Pit. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Wait, wait, wait, wait. I'm sorry. If we go back to Victoria Lopez, I would like to say, as Mr. Butthole Jones...

How did I know you were going to be Butthole Jones? All right, Butthole Jones. What's up, Butthole? Excuse me, Mr. Jones, if you could. Who? Butthole Jones! You, sir, are gay. Not a little gay, but super fucking gay. P.S. My b-hole itches.

Hence my name, Butthole Jones. I feel like Butthole Jones is kind of a gay name. Butthole Jones. How do you figure?