The F Plus - 185: Because That's Stupid.

Episode Date: August 19, 2015

"Why not?" is the kind of question that carries with it a lot of connotations of poor thought processes, but in the case of this episode (recorded a while ago), "Why Not?" is the name of an idea dumpsite started by two Yale professors until they found something else to spend time on. The format should be somewhat familiar: People present unworkable solutions to problems nobody has, and then other people... do nothing at all. This week, beware of the joke locusts.

Why not kill all cancer patients? Eureka! Welcome to the F+, an innovative place for terrible things, right with enthusiasm. In the room tonight we have Boots Rain Gear. The idea is if we combine vitamins with pizzas. Yay! Nutshell Gulag! The sound of Nutshell Gulag speaking. Boo, poor Tex! Why not tax obese people for their burden upon society, Nutshell?

And, eh, Adam Bozarth. It would be handy to have a luminescent face. And Lemon. Here's a simple solution to the never-ending crisis in the Middle East. Declare Israel and Palestine to be a single country. Now all we need is a name. Clusterfuck. Topia.

Pakistan. I like Pakistan. I would vacation to Pakistan. Hey F+. Hey Lemon. How optimistic are you about the future? Not very. We're doomed.

Gay marriage passed, we're doomed. I heard that somewhere. We're all on this slippery slope together. We're being. Gay marriage passed, we're doomed. I heard that somewhere. Yeah, we're all on this slippery slope together. I'm just upset. We're still reeling from the court case that happened today, but you are listening to this later. But I have a site that's going to make you very excited about the future. Because the future is, and I think I'm probably coining this phrase, a marketplace of ideas. So to that end, we have a document that was provided to us by Lady Frenzy.

Yeah. Frenzy. And this is for a site called Why Not? And this is for a site called Why Not? Now, Why Not? is an idea site where people can share their ideas, which are obviously not stupid and terrific. And we have done idea-type sites before. Boy, have we. But here's a couple differences with Why Not.

First of all, it is closed for submissions as of 2013, so this is just a distillation of really the best of Why Not, I'm sure. The second is that the site has a pedigree, which is that one of the founders who put his picture on the homepage is the founder of Honest Tea. So, hey, there's an idea. I think I've drunk that. And most importantly for us, we are going to be looking at ideas, all of which are rated from very strong to very weak.

So as we're looking at this idea, or as we're looking at these ideas, are rated from very strong to very weak. So as we're looking at these ideas, we can know whether or not what we're looking at is a good idea. So let's start out with an average idea. And this is an average idea by Big Idea Man. So Adam, if you'll take this one, please. This is what's happening in Egypt right now, right? Okay.

You mean the Pringle Spring? Why did they call it the Springle? It's the Pringle Spring. What? What? It's the spring for Pringles. You're going to have to explain your idea. I don't understand. Why doesn't Pringles just put a spring in the bottom of the can

so guys with big hands don't have to try fishing chips without the finger scissor move or worse, tip in the can only to get all of the crumbs in your lap or on the floor. This would be simple to add to their production line and I think would be a big improvement. Don't try to take this idea.

I currently have it in a patent pending status. Big idea, man. Just like to correct you, it would be a big improvment. It would be a big improvment. It would be a big improvment! I think that's actually an okay derivation. Improvment.

Yeah. Yeah, so he has a patent pending status, so somebody else's can that's their own patent, he has a patent on this idea for that can. So, you know, I hope that gets out of pending one of these days.

Just make it for me. I start a patent for another company's product. I got the big hand scissor move I can't do. Hey, my name's Roger Knights. Instead of a spring, how about a transparent light plastic tube that fits around the contents with a pull-down strip one inch wide along its length? Pull the tube up with one hand, pull the flap down with the other, and extract. Cost would be the only object.

It might be feasible if it only cost three cents. See, I was thinking... Or they could put the damn thing in a simple plastic bag I was thinking that the Pringles spring was going to be like When you have the spring snakes, like the canned snakes You open up the can and the Pringles just fly into your face Whee! Pringles snacks

Yeah The amount of people that we end up reading about That are just fucking baffled by Pringles cans So strange. So let's just move away from here and to another average idea. In a nutshell, your name is Why Not? I love when usernames are basically

the name of the website. And what's your idea called? Colored Shit. What? Colored shit. What? Colored shit. Okay. I'm tired of staring at the same brown-colored shit every day. My idea is for a nutritional supplement that will make shit different colors.

It would contain some sort of non-digestible paint. I think a lot of paint's non-digestible. If you were feeling down, you could take a blue pill and have blue shit. If you were feeling environmentally conscious, you could take a green pill and have green shit. The white pill would be especially useful since it would match the color of most toilets. This would save on cleaning.

It's not that... Ah! Ew! Oh! So many... No! Ah! Ah! You can hardly notice it's there. There's... Ew. Oh. So many. No. Ah. Ah.

You can hardly notice it's there. There's, I mean, there's already non-digestible paint. You may have heard of it. It's called paint. Yeah. Like, what the fuck? Well, we're going to go straight from that to another great food-related idea. Portax, what would you like to see?

What would I like to see? Yeah, what would you like to see? What would I like to see? Yeah, what would you like to see? Tell me. Adult-sized Capri Suns. So I'm assuming it's like six foot tall. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The idea in itself is simplistic, and I don't...

What, backslash? See how I could elaborate much more. But now I'm gonna. The current size Capri Suns just aren't as large to the adult, or in my case, teenager, as they are to the kid. Obviously, this idea has been around for a while, seeing how as I try to actually research the topic in depth, I'm finding blogs and forums discussing the topic, ranging back to when I was still one of those kids finding no flaws with its size. Link, please! No! But all these blogs consist of nostalgic 14- to 25-year-olds complaining about the fact that they have to drink two at once.

Double-fisted Capri Sun drinking. I know the issue. I know the simple solution. I know the issue. I know the simple solution. What I would like to know is what is keeping this idea down? If there are plenty of people who want their favorite childhood drink to upgrade it for their new age. Yes, yes, I know this seems like a frivolous issue to complain about. And it serves no purpose over satisfying my thirts in a more practical way. But this topic has bugged me for a while.

Satisfy my thirts. I wanted to say that on my giant Capri Sun bag. Sure, let's just get a camelback bag. Serious discussion. Yeah, serious discussion on where the lack of logic is in the idea as people grow up they want the rest of their childhood to do so as well.

What? I refuse to attach my name to this idea. They want the rest of their childhood to grow up? No, generally people start drinking big kid drinks when they grow up. Yeah, like juice from a bottle. I want a bigger bag of juice. I just want like a water bed of juice. Can we make that happen?

Spoxed wine. Yeah, exactly. So Lady Frenzy has broken this document up into a whole bunch of different sections. We were reading the food section. This is the final piece in the food section. And here's my problem. I'm Rhiannette, and here's my problem. I only have two hands.

Why not? Why not? Why not have only two hands? I only have two hands. I go to many functions. Oh, la-di-da. Yeah. When it's snack time at a function,

you inevitably end up with a coffee or juice in the hand and a small plate with snacks in the other hand. Church functions. There are only a few small tables open and they are already occupied. How do you eat or drink? Design a coffee saucer that is oval And they are already occupied. How do you eat or drink? Design a coffee saucer that is oval with enough space for a few eats on the saucer.

Problem solved. And some snacks. Oh, sorry. Yeah, that'll make life easier. This was an average idea. Yeah, they'll be able to put you down for nap time afterwards with a lot less fuss. So what is... I... Make plates?

Plates. Yeah. Invent plates. The problem to be solved here is I can't put enough free food in my mouth. Mm-hmm. Yeah. So I want a side-mounted cup holder on my Dixie plate. Please.

Which exists. Those are out there. You could probably 3D print one or something. Users who like this idea also liked worst-rated ideas. And that idea consists entirely of the sentence, this site needs to list the worst rated ideas to compliment the best rated ones. Agreed. So we're going to be moving from the food section into the home section.

Boots, I know that you like toothbrushes and razors and throwing things away. Yeah, I'm a Pupendia 007. Disposable razor toothbrush. Disposable razor toothbrush combo. That's how you make a shiv when you're in juvie. Experience? Oh, my dad told me stories. Oh, okay. experience? Oh, my dad told me stories. Oh, okay.

A disposable razor at one end of a toothbrush and at the other end of the stick. Oh, at a toothbrush at the other end of the stick. Use the toothbrush first and then have your shave. What? So... Okay. A small strip

of toothpaste can be mounted and sealed on the toothbrush. I am not aware of the health issues of such a combo. It would be a useful gizmo when you are on vacation, and forget to carry your toothbrush or razor or both. Okay, so when you're shaving, you're rubbing your palms up against your toothbrush.

Great. Yep. And then when you're brushing your teeth, you're gashing your hands with the razor. I don't see the health. I'm not aware of the health issues involved in such a combo. Well, no, I can't imagine how you could be aware of them. They're a mystery. Portex, you just found something...

You just found a ninja suit. Is that right? How would you know I found the ninja suit? You can't see me. Well, it is... By the way, every idea that we've seen so far has been average. This is our first weak idea. Portex, tell me about the ninja suit, please.

All right, guys, look. Okay, so I called this the ninja suit. It enables you invisibility. You got me? Okay, great, yep. Too many people can see me, and that's clearly causing problems for the world. I need to fix that. The premise for this idea comes from Gray Newt's idea about noise cancellation outside of a room.

You are wearing the suit that is covered in electromagnetic sensors that interpret all the colors coming towards you. Okay. Just brace yourself for the fucking colors. Rainbow terrain. Yeah, everybody knows that colors are ferrous. Yeah, well, it's even better. It sends out a frequency on the visible color scale exactly

opposite. So, you know how when you mix two complementary colors, it turns invisible? Yeah. What? It makes a new color called invisible. Alpha. Apply an exclusive or. You're good.

Why? While it wouldn't provide total invisibility, it would provide good camouflage. Why wouldn't it provide total invisibility? You said that complementary colors made you invisible. Technically, that's the truest thing in this entire pitch. Well, the

electromagnetic sensors can't interpret the electromagnetism quite fast enough yet. Well, there's just too many colors coming at you. Yeah, that too. There's just so many. Brace yourself, it's a color storm. I'm going to go ahead and say illegal immigrants are the reason.

This would be good because in the military you would need only one suit regardless of terrain and even weapons can be equipped so they don't stand out. I'm Dwayne Anderson. That idea is being tested sort of.

You can put a camera on your back and an LCD on your front and then just show an image of what's behind you. This has been experimented on with military vehicles. To great effect,

I assume. Oh, did I mean military vehicles? I meant minivans that are showing Frozen. Okay. Experience. Anonymous is disappointed to know that someone beat him to it. I like that somebody would be trolling Why Not and be like,

Oh, you son of a bitch! You didn't act on the idea that I wanted to not act on! No stealing now. Uh... Uh... Nutshell? Yes? Uh, you got a sink idea, right?

This is a wonderful thing for the home. Is it poop again? No. Nope, it's not. It's not poop. It's a fair question. It's a fair question. Ask me when I provide you with a link. Oh, God, this person is an inadvertent fan of Dadaism. Yeah.

Fur sink! A typical bathroom sink lined with fur. For those who aspire to the ultimate in high class, real animal fur would be used. For those who are budget conscious or in high class, real animal fur would be used. For those who are budget conscious or animal rights activists, artificial fur could be used instead. It could also

be applied to a kitchen sink, but that may be unhygienic. Maybe. It might be. What was your name? Fart Garfunkel. Yep. I like it. I likekel. Yep. I like it. I like it.

Yep. Yep. Hello, darkness. My old... No, not dark poop. We need green poop. Alright, let's do one more in the home section. Adam, tell me about your DVD player idea.

Oh, yes. My name is Lokashk. And I want a DVD player for rated movies. I would like to see DVD players which would give me buttons to play a DVD for PG. PG-13. R or M versions if the parts of the movie,

e.g. each frame, is rated different than EG, G, PG, ETC, then I can buy slash rent one DVD and pop into my DVD

player push PG button and it only plays PG rated parts of the movie and skips anything above that EG PG 13 R and M

if the movie industry and DVD player manufacturers did this we would surely see lots of these DVD players sell this is my report on my invention thank you

flag is spam so this guy is like I mean invention. Thank you. Flag of spam. So this guy's like, I mean, he's essentially watching a porno movie, but backwards. He wants every movie to be scanned each moment by moment for what rating they would fall under.

We already have Mormon movie editing services. Exactly. That's what this guy needs to get up to. Can you, like, pay the Mormon... Like, can you just give them any movie, and then they'll have to edit it for you? I don't think it works that way. Oh, because that could be fun.

What movie were you thinking, Lemon? Buttslits Volume 3. No! New Wave Hookers 5. Oh, come on. Ooh, a classic. Yeah, so the next section we have coming up is about driving. But before we get into driving, we need to do one piece on canoeing.

It's like driving. Yeah, that Boots Reign gear found some boots. I'm Ted Shadow. Hey, Ted Shadow. I'm Ted Shadow. Imagine... I've got... Oh, sorry. I got ahead of myself there. Asbestos

canoe. Asbestos canoe. I need cancer on the bus. Imagine going to Hawaii and traveling to the top of the great volcano. Setting up your asbestos canoe and

flowing down a huge lava flow. Do it. Being the first to achieve this miraculous feat. How exciting can you get? Do it. That... Wow! I've got a comment for myself here.

Okay, good, good. Yeah, what's up? This is the bestest idea I've ever heard. Do you have any other comments you wanted to leave on the comment to your own idea? Oh yeah, I said this idea reminds me of the previous great idea I had while sitting on the speaker of the House of Chair in Parliament.

This is free, and for what it's worth, it's a bargain. This idea is the bad newspaper. Isn't that just the newspaper? Imagine a newspaper that only talks about bad news. Just imagine that. Okay, okay, boy, can I? What? Will there be kids on page six?

Would there be enough? All of the sickos and slimeballs that enjoy blood and snot and death and bullets and watching someone and something suffer would pay religiously. You would make millions. Yes, Rupert Murdoch, you would. Is it broken into sections? So there's like a blood section, a snot section, a bullet section. Sure.

Okay. Portex, you were finding so many terrific ones. I love them. Um, Portex, you were finding so many terrific ones. Uh, but we've also, uh, got some important ideas here from, from Lady Frenzy, uh, such as, uh, my car. And, uh, you know, there's one thing about my car that makes it great. And that's that my car says, hello. So hello, daddy.

Hello. So hello daddy Hello mom I'm a K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K LCDs on the front and back windshields. Oh, boy. Okay, so those could be made to display simple pre-typed messages at the push of a button and allow you to let other drivers know what you're thinking. Sounds like a great idea. Such as? Yeah, so messages like, we're having a baby. That could be handy for a policeman behind you to know.

I don't want to know what other drivers are thinking. Hey, speed up, blue hair. Could be printed in XL letters in mirror image for Granny to check out in the rear view. Take that, Granny. Take that, March Simpson. Oh, my. You have aged out of respect. Take that, anime.

Just need irony, baby. I got more. Go ahead. That's better than waiting for someone at a force way stop to figure it out. Because there's literally no other way to signal. Nope. How would you signal to go? Well, obviously, you'd use your middle finger

but that would give the wrong message what if those guys that want to fuck their cars are driving down the street then what would i say help me the car the car is taking over save me uh and then how about Here's my number Or your favorite cheesy pickup line For the hot girl in the convertible You know the hot girl in the convertible That one She won't have an LCD though

So you won't know if she's going to take down your number or not Handy for all those National Lampoon vacation situations I think she likes me Rusty Handy for all those National Lampoon vacation situations. I think she likes me, Rusty. Alright, last one in the driving section. Portax, this idea is called Invisible Police Force. Are they wearing the new suit? We've already seen a user called Why Not, so this user's name is WhyNotYet.

Alright. But who will police the invisible police? Every five mile, a solar power police siren light are installed at the road divider. Okay. I hate this Dylan song. Every five mile. I hate this Dylan song. The siren light can increase the Okay. The siren light

can increase the of police without higher or more office. Maybe you should be doing this in a stereotypical Italian accent Make sure the real patrol are still there on the road Italian, huh?

Yeah, sure Look, Britain's attitude is bad enough Can I see your passport? It sounded more Sicilian to me I guess I didn't recognize that sort of raging bull attitude. So the real and invisibly police will decrease the overspeed driver significant. Listen to this conversation. You bet.

Why you get here so late? I drove 50 MHH. Miles an hour hour? Yeah, miles an hour per hour. Miles an hour per hour. Yeah, there it is. Miles an hour per hour.

Why? I saw 200 police offices on 400 miles road. What? What a deed. Why not? Yes. What does that mean? these offices on 400 miles road what what what indeed why not yes why didn't that happen yet uh i don't know what i have no idea what happened there i do not I have no idea what happened there. I do not know. Boots, what did you just find in the automobile section there?

I'm Brian Salveson, and my idea is floating cars. I think cars should be able to float, so if you're in an accident and swerve to a water source, your car doesn't sink, and you're safe. All cars should have this. So, how do they float? How do they float? They should float.

They just should. The power of imagination. They should. The smiles of Christ. Because I only ever drive on beaches And by water source Like are you Are you like driving into Water towers because that seems difficult

Like reservoirs And protected marshlands Yeah Canals I have an idea it's called driving sober What? No dude Why would I need that When I got a floating car I have an idea. It's called driving sober. What? No. No, that will never happen.

No, dude. Okay. No. Why would I need that when I got a floating car? Yeah, my car floats, dude. Well, that's enough of that. Adam. Yes.

We're going to move on to the animal section, and you have a terrific idea about dolphins, right? Yeah. Good. Cool. dolphins, right? Yeah. Good. Yes, hello! Hello! Dolphins as useful pets! Oh, okay. I really

wonder if one of the most intelligent cute animals on Earth, dolphins could have been used more efficiently and more widely than in a few

amusement parks. I really wonder why we have not tapped this intelligent mammal as common used pet. We live on the land! Dolphins swim in the land! Yeah, yeah. Dolphins swim in the water!

That's my guess. We have thought of dot period use of pets on the ground but never underground. They live in the water! Huh? Under? Wait. Are you confusing dolphins

with naked mole rats? Why? They're so similar. They do look pretty similar. I would love to see 20-year-old blonde girls getting naked mole rat tattoos on their stomach. That would be so great. Really neon-y ones, though. And unlike most tattoos, they would actually improve as you aged.

Like the Lisa Frank rainbow naked mole rat. Terrific. Trapper keeper. Love it, yeah. Unicorns and naked mole rats. Chrome naked mole rats. Imagine teaching them to help bring fish into nets, dragging boats,

helping in diving expeditions, working as messengers and couriers. I mean, assuming that everyone you want to deliver a package, like, that you want Amazon to deliver you a package

and you are underwater. Yeah, dolphin drones. Okay, yeah, cool. Carrying SOS sign and helping and finding help in the seas in hazardous situations when all

man-made measures fail. When all man-made measures fail, there is only dolphin force. Boom, boom, boom. Laughter Laughter Laughter There is only dolphin force Seeking out the nearby sailing ships And bringing them to help Pulling unmanned small Cargo boats on shorter distances Hey dolphin

We need to take this to Italy Ready go Are you trying to turn a dolphin Into a drug mule Hey dolphin, we need to take this to Italy. Ready, go. Are you trying to turn a dolphin into a drug mule? Look, shoving cocaine up a dolphin's ass is going to be... Dolphin holding cocaine in mouth. Well that just makes the dolphin go faster. And so forth, so on. Huh?

No, sorry. And so on, so on. Huh? No, sorry. And so on, so forth. Mm-hmm. There are hundred, hundred, Yep. hundred, hundred. There are hundred of ways to train them

and use their brain for various in-water and underwater purposes. Those are two different things. Very few people know that you can use a dolphin's brain as a flotation device. Oh, that's how they do it. In case of an emergency, a dolphin is located under your seat.

What? Can dolphins be used as commonly as any other pet? No! You should have started with that question. Why not? Dogs were specially bred to understand and live with humans, not dolphins. Can I get an underwater dog underground and so forth on? Sure, we'll just saw off his legs and put some fins on.

Ooh! I got one more dolphin-related idea. Goddammit! Yeah, no, my name's Sand. Hey, hands for dolphins! I got one more dolphin-related idea. God damn it. Yeah, no, my name's Sand. Hey, hands for dolphins. Sweet. Yeah, it has recently been demonstrated that a monkey equipped with a skullcap of electric sensors could learn to operate a robotic hand by merely thinking,

and the teaching process was relatively quick and simple. Okay. Yeah. Sadism. Trained dolphins have been used for a long time to aid humans in military situations and hopefully in peaceful context. Since they can operate in situations that humans find difficult, it should be useful to provide them with a harness equipped with tactile devices like some form of artificial hands to do the finer

manipulation than what was not capable. This is an average idea. Like, what do they need the finer motor skills for? You know. Punching fish.

Are they just gonna climb to land and just overtake us? Like, what the fuck? I want a handjob from a dolphin. Take it back underwater. Oh, man. I just... All the doctors have been killed, and the only person that can perform this heart surgery

is a fucking dolphin. Flipper, get your ass in here. Get scrubbed in. You're gonna go. Is that scalpel, or what do you need? Alright, so we are out of the animals category. Now we're going to

get into women and men, and the sexuality between them. So this is gonna be a... Yeah, we're gonna know a little bit more about the sort of courting ritual. This is going to be great. This idea is from 2007, so presumably it probably has come into fruition, like most of these ideas should.

Portex, you want to take this one, please? Sure. Cheat Sheet for Women. What category is this in? This is in sport. No, right? So I'm Alyssa.

Oh, hi. I'm Alyssa237. I think that's what those numbers are. Anyway, this idea is for all the women out there who feel lost when talking about sports with men. I don't know what sports are. I'm too busy baking shoes. Anyway, even if you care less about the sport, there are certain occasions where it would be nice to seem knowledgeable on the topic.

knowledgeable on the topic. I.e. went out with a group of men, went out to the sports bar, picking up men, giving blowjobs to men, being servile to men. Picking up men? Right, yeah. Hey there, big guy. You like sports? Hey, how's it going? LeBron's

having a hell of a season. No, there's just this one creepy dude who asked me to literally lift him up on my shoulders. It was kind of fun, though. Oh, I'm sure people like that never exist. That's silly. So I'm suggesting a cheat sheet per sport that would basically be

a 101 on the rules of the game. Why? It would give anyone who wanted to know more about the sport a chance to quickly learn what it's all about. See, looking stuff up and printing it out, that's literally, like, impossible. So it's like the how to play blackjack thing,

except for just, like, about football. Yeah, like, see, like, you know, that guy Steve Guttenberg invented the printing press, I think, but it's just so hard to use. Yeah, but all he did was just print pictures of himself. It's true. The cheat sheet would also have a link to a website.

What? Sorry. It would also have a link to a website that would consist of current events in that sport. So you would always be in the know as to the goings on. This would be an alternative to fishing through all the lingo and ESPN and Sports Illustrated and the like. Anyway, Alyssa out. Hey, thanks, Alyssa. Okay, so I don't

I'm going to guess that in this group of people that I'm in right now, I'm probably not alone in this. But I fucking hate sports, and my ignorance of that is terrific because my ignorance of that keeps me out of conversations about sports. I don't like sports.

I don't want to have conversations about sports, so I don't know anything about sports, and people don't talk to me about sports. It works out great. You're not trying to pick up men. Yeah, but what if you're in a group, yeah, what if you're, like, surrounded by a group of, like, regular men, and they're like, well, I want to talk about sports, because that's all there is to think about. Well, that's when I pull out my phone. What if they throw you a curveball? That's what Twitter's for.

Who knows what a curveball is? Look, I just love it when John Maddenly kicks the puck into the basket. It's great! Yeah, that's the other thing, too. Why would a cheat sheet help? puck into the basket. It's great. Yeah, that's the other thing, too, is just like, but like, why, how,

why would a cheat sheet help? Like, you have like, just even if they are getting deep into like a sports-related conversation, it would just be like, is he the one that makes the touchdowns? Yeah, you're just looking up and down

like at this sheet of paper. Oh, yes. I love the Miami Jazz Squad. Look, I just want to date somebody. Okay. Yeah, that's...

Hi. Hello. I'm Mill Wander. Okay. I got a fashion idea here. It's a men's open zipper alarm Draw more attention That's a gay bar in Chelsea Check out my men's open zipper

We all know how embarrassing An open fly could be Why not create some type of sensor that senses if your zipper is open? It could sound some sort of alarm. We're at the battle station. Your penis is out. Your penis is out. So you can quickly close it before someone else has to be the one to tell you.

A good idea could save you a lot of embarrassment. A small device can be built into the slider tag. It can be powered by a small button cell. If your fly is open, it should trigger an alarm. A alarm. The big question is, where do you put the alarm? It could be nice. No, it could nice.

It could nice if the cell, it could nice. It could nice if the cell phone picks up the single and rings to alert you about your open fly. Oh, hang on. I have a call from my dick. Yes, hello. Okay, so all you're going to need is a SIM card for your pants.

Yep. You're going to need some batteries. A charger. Yeah, because an alarm that goes off when your fly is down is a lot more subtle than... You're going to need, I guess, a plastic protector to prevent the electrical components from getting wet and electrocuting your penis. You could customize it. How about just drinking a few less beers and you'll remember to zip yourself up after you go take a leave?

There's nobody around that can just tell you that your fly is down? If it's that much of a consistent problem... Just check every time. I gotta say, I saw one, the idea itself isn't great, just the title is really good.

It says Ginger Trombone. Yeah, that's what I just... It's pretty good. It's not about what you think it is either. Yeah, it's the other strip bar in Chelsea. Yeah. So, my name's Tread Air. Let me tell you something about myself.

No, let me just tell you about my idea, really. It's a fashion idea. Okay. Okay. Listen, I hate it when women talk. It fucking drives me crazy. I tried figuring out sports. I'm sorry. I do like it when women apologize.

I'll say that much. Okay. So this is the handicap bra. Do I get to park in a handicap space with it? This one's very weak. Yeah, that's because of women. Like, soccer chick didn't like my idea? What the fuck?

Okay, look. This would be for small-breasted women who are tired of being ignored in bars. The bra would look normal until the woman presses her arm against one of the sides. That action would pop up a large pair of nipples to attract the attention of whichever sex she was more inclined towards and take the attention away from her

more well-endowed competitors. So, like, if you're flapping your arms, would they just go in and out? Yeah. her more well-endowed competitors. So, like, if you're like, like flapping your arms, would they just go in and out? Yeah. It's like, yeah, they're like pump they're like pump sneakers. Bruh, bruh, activate turbo

pursuit nipple mode. So, tell me, where do you Oh, I'm sorry. Her nipples are much more erect than yours are. Now come back, I'm sorry. Her nipples are much more erect than yours are. Now come back. I can see where they are. I'm sorry. Okay, so if she was feeling particularly attracted to her target,

she could press her arm against the strap on the other side, which causes the nipples to wiggle. This ventriloquism act is weird. Why don't we just get... You know what? No, no, no. Even better. How about she has a space where she can stick her hands

up in front of her tits and pretend like her nipples are talking and be like Jim Henson Muppet Mouth nipples? That will get people's attention right away. Here's my problem. I'm straight,

but I've always wanted to fuck Ravishing Rick Rude. That is a problem Sorry audience, don't look it up It's my problem too Underwire bras already have The foundation needed to make this work For weirder settings The bras could pop up two or more

Nipples on each cup If the bras are produced Now what hold on stop yeah what you just flew past that but basically no now he's just basically saying now four nipples at once well he's this is just the natural escalation of an idea right you're like nipples okay nipples are great nipples are. Nipples are better when they're erect. They're even better when they wiggle. Obviously, the more nipples somebody has, the better that is.

Yeah, exactly. That way my sow of a wife can nurse her young. If these bras are produced, they should only come in a small cup version so the women with larger breasts couldn't take back their advantage. Aw, damn it. We're gonna get turny strats in. Load out. Tit load out.

Why did you think my idea was weak? What the hell? And then, Boots, just take the very first paragraph from Mystic of Pharaohs, please. You left a comment. Yep. When I go to bars, I always try releasing pheromones and flashing my defensive eye spots. That usually helps me attract the male. But then again, I'm a skunk.

It's true. Okay, so that was the women and men category. We are moving from there to a category called sadism. Oh, boy. So this is pretty special. Portex is finding so many of these. Okay, so, yes. This is the sadism category. Adam,

if you'll be Jet Gabatan. Jet Gabatan, please. That's my super sentai hero name. Jet Gabatan. My idea of laughing pills. Why not pharmaceutical...

What? What is it? Why not pharmaceutical companies develop a new kind of drug that can pause people to laugh for a few hours so that when people are experiencing any

kind of sickness or illness, he slash she can take the drug and be happy because people around the globe know that laughter is the best medicine. Even a dying person can still survive because of laughter.

Because based from experience, it can survive through the laughter. Because based from experience, it can cure diseases temporarily. That's not what the word cure means. People can enjoy their numbered days laughing. So when the time comes, people can die

with a smiling face. Wow, that turned into a Nihilist Arby's tweet at the end. Jet Gabatan! Go! What? What? What?

Okay. He's gone. He's gone. His theme song's kicked in. The credits have rolled. The credits have rolled. He's sniffing a rose in his jet mobile. He's gone. a rose in his jet mobile. He's done.

My name's Sand. This is one of the most disgusting ideas I have ever come across. What? When I am dying of cancer, I would rather not giggle myself to death. I could just see a crowd of people watching a tragedy such as 9-11 or the misery of Katrina in New Orleans laughing insanely as people suffer and die. Horrible and insane. Let's go to Republican National Convention.

You'll see a lot of that, actually. Not as insane as you are, Sam. I'd just like to point out that on more than half of the things we read today, Sand was the first comment. Yeah. Sand gets in everywhere. Yeah. Like the judge.

Thanks, Bizarre. Oh, I just felt like I take one of those pills! Nutshell, what do you got? Miss Liz White? Yeah, hi dear. I'm Liz White. Hey. And lots of people who sleep because of the snorer on the other side of the bed.

Sure, there are no strips for the snorer, but those often don't work for serious snorers. As a victim of lost sleep because of my boyfriend snoring, which is actually a very serious problem for me. I've tried many tactics. The only thing that seems to interrupt and stop his snoring is making noise or giving him a little nudge. Not enough to wake him up, but enough to make him shift in his sleep and turn on his side. My boyfriend's the clapper. He only snores when he sleeps on his back, which I assume is common among snorers. I propose a thin bracelet that would be able to detect the snoring sound

and harmlessly shock the snorer to make them turn on their side or shift in their sleep The snorer would get accustomed to this subconsciously and learn what this shock is telling him or her to do while allowing him or her to continue sleeping

while also allowing his or her partner on the other side of the bed to sleep soundly, or in this case soundlessly sleeping. Or to wake up in a cold sweat going, I'm a moo cow, I'm a moo cow. Or in this case, soundlessly to I had the nightmare again. I liked how sane the first half of that was.

Snoring is a serious problem. Anyway, electrocute him! Think about how much sleep she's lost. Yeah, yeah. She's probably just lying there going, electroshock therapy, yeah, that's the ticket. I want to break this lamp and just jam the broken ends into your face. I hate you so much.

I just shoved my husband into a giant George Foreman grill and broke him to death. Just tape up his face. And other people need to know he's a snorer, so that's why we'll brand him. Just a scarlet letter. I think,

yeah, okay, here we go. This one, is this still, yes, this is still in the sadism category. Adam, if you'll take this one, please. I'm Z.odApple. Hmm. Hmm. And my YDOD is paid as a license requirement.

Oh, boy. It's an average idea. Oh, boy. I have heard about a device called a seat belt convincer. It's a car seat where you wear a seat belt and then you slide down a track. And when you get to the bottom of the track, you feel the painful impact of a 5 to 10 mile per hour crash. mile per hour crash. Right now, these devices are only available to use at temporary

events like county fairs or sporting events. You mean Gitmo? I don't... what? Yeah, the Gitmo county fair. Oh dear. They have the best funnel. You want to commit war crimes? It'll be five bucks.

No, don't play the dunk tank. Don't play the dunk tank. I think in order to get a driver's license or a learner's permit, you should be required by law to ride in one of these simulators. If you know what it feels like to crash, you'll be more likely to wear your

seatbelt, more likely to pay attention to the road when you drive, and less likely to speed, drive drunk, or try to beat the train to a railroad crossing. What if you go down this slide?

You'll do all that. Okay. Pain is a universal motivator to behave rationally. Okay. I mean, it's not, though. It's really, like... Boy, have there been a lot of studies

that prove you wrong. Nuh-uh. Oh. Okay, I'm wrong. Prove my daddy's fist wrong. You know what they say. The cycle of abuse is super easy to break. I'll break the cycle of abuse right now in front of you.

Hey, how come you're so angry all the time? Why do you think that is? I don't want to think about it. all the time. Why do you think that is? I don't want to think about it! Pain is the universal motivator to behave rationally regardless of sex, age, race, color, or creed. That's why security

guards and police officers have to be sprayed with pepper spray and receive an electric shock from tasers because no text, no image, no film or video can describe how dangerous tasers and pepper spray are, quite like the painful sensation they deliver. Except for the pepper spraying of police officers isn't to make people not use pepper spray.

It's that you were trying to engage some sort of empathy so that they know what the experience is like. Yeah, exactly. So, guys. Yeah, what? I'm on the actual website for this product that is real and has been made and is being used. Are you fucking kidding me? There's a YouTube video of high school kids being subjected to terrible neck injuries on this thing. Getting seatbelt convinced.

Fucking who to guest. Fucking plot twist. Yeah. Click here to learn more about the seatbelt convinced. Fucking who to guest. Fucking plot twist. Yeah. Click here to learn more about the seatbelt convincer. But I have one word that explains it all. Kansas. Kansas.

That does it. I knew this bastard was going to do it. Damn it, Xander. We are going to be moving on in just a scant moment to loneliness, which is a category on itself. But before we get to that, Boots found something here that I need to read. It's in the health category, and it's by Adrian Vance. Okay. Very simple We feel that much internal illness

Is caused by the darkness of the internal body cavity When organs bump into each other And become angry Wait what? Okay Because they can't see Who said that? Who touched the butt?

We feel that So we offer the Rectolux, a fiber optic cable to conduct light connected by a fiber optic beanie. Oh, sweet. So the organs can see each other. So it's like... The cerebro for your butthole? So it's like if you set up a hot dog on a stick in Space Paranoids, that's what it would look like. I'm imagining a propeller beanie.

I'm assuming the rest of you are too, right? The light is conducted down the back and into the rectum to light the interior organs. Thus, they can become friends and get along better than always going bump in the darkness of the normal, miserable, forgotten existence. In this way, we can rectify one of the great errors of evolution or God's funky engineering. Yeah, okay. Light up organs. What? How come we evolved to be dark

inside? Yeah, exactly. I mean, you know, like, Linkin Park is always singing about the darkness inside. Wow. Crickets. Alright. They've come to ruin the harvest. There's so many crickets.

No. No. Oh my god, they're locusts! They're joke locusts! It's a plague of sarcastic crickets. Why would anybody want to... Why do they feel that they need to light up their organs? So they'll stop bumping into each other.

They'll still stop bumping into each other for health. Don't you... Your angry organs are making you angry. But not all your organs are hollow. That's why they call it organ failure, because they feel like failures for running into each other. They need to be organ friends. Yeah. You don't know anything about science. Light up organ friends!

As a registered cartoonist, I know everything about the inside of the body and all the science shit that's in there. Yeah, how come you're always drawing that? Like, that's... It pays the bills, asshole! You got a better idea? I'm a cartoonist. I have to draw

the opened up women. I have to draw the opened up women. I have to draw them opened up. Because they've been punished, I have to open them up. These are just, you know, for study that I have all these vivisected people. Look, Da Vinci did it. This helps me make

Princess Bubblegum. Nutshell, like many people, you have a desire for children, right? Isn't that right? Oral fluids? Sure. So, like many people, you have a desire for children.

Like many people, I have a desire for children. I believe this desire is a natural instinct preserved through many generations of human evolution. However, children are very expensive. Some studies suggest one child costs $250,000. Where are you buying your children from? Studies show that one child costs that.

I don't have that child. children from. Studies show that one child costs that. I don't have that child. A child can distract you from your job and therefore thereby cost you a promotion or lower your salary because you work less to spend more time with a child.

Well, don't take your child to your performance review. How fantastic would it be then to have access to an artificial child, a machine whose features are accurate enough to resemble a human child? Oh, God. I fucked my real doll nine months later. I want AI to be real.

Why not move to the Uncanny Valley? You can live there. We'll satiate an adult's evolutionary instincts for paternalism or maternalism while still being cheap and disposable. Oh, that's just my artificial child. The artificial child can have limbs that grow over time to simulate natural growth in a human child. There are three inputs to the artificial child. Vision, audio, and movement.

Vision is what the artificial child can see. The child has a camera where its eyes are and can see its environment. The image is picked up with a sense of computer. Audio acts the same way as vision, except the microphone picks up sound. There will be voice recognition software so the child can understand human speech. Movement comes from its limbs. Parents like to touch their baby and move the baby around.

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the movements have to be received, digitalized, and then transmitted to the computer. For example, if a child is picked up, the baby will have to recognize this. When information is inputted, it goes through a software that processes it and then comes up

with output. The software will contain mathematical formulae and algorithms that will simulate child behavior. Oh good, I'm glad we're using mathematical formulae. The software will be created by programmers working with child psychologists.

The software will need to be able to come up with enough random or creative output so the artificial child's behavior is not too predictable. The software will put the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again. Hello, I'm Art Z. Hey, Art! And I've got a joke machine.

Woo! That sounds zany. Power up that joke machine. Let's have it. First, have a database of jokes that actually have been shown to make some people laugh. Huh? Okay. And then second type in keywords into this portable joke database like cow plus chicken.

And it will automatically come up with jokes that include those two words. Wow. An instance in which this might be used is when a conversation is getting boring. Or taking a turn for the worse, and you need a good joke to lighten the mood. So I guess in that case it would be cow and chicken fucking sucks? No, sorry, it's not chicken. It's sea kicking. Yeah, sea kicking.

Well, let me tell you how the machine works. So you search the last two words that someone just said. It doesn't have to be cow or chicken. That was just a first example. Just the last two words that somebody just said or something you notice in to be cow or chicken, that was just a first example. Okay. Just the last two words that somebody just said, or something you notice in the room, could be that, and

the joke machine finds the perfect joke to go along with your current conversation. Hurrah! The evening has just been saved, you might say. Yeah, why is it in quotes? I say that after plenty jokes. The joke comes up on the screen,

and then you either read it to your friend or press the next joke button, and it will then come up with the second most popular joke in its database that uses those one or two or three keywords. Wait, not three keywords. I don't care how many. Three. You can have up to three.

Okay. Can I have four? You may also have a USB cord that can get downloaded jokes from the joke machine's website that could also charge the portable joke box. Oh, there is the beginning of your idea. Yeah, it's called the joke box. Like the joke box, see?

Stick with me, R-D-Z. Another version of this invention is a robot that spontaneously tells jokes all the time. Yes, for fuck's sake! I call it the Wisecracking Robot. And it's always the non-sentient It's always the non-sentient life of the party.

Hey, that's my title, fucker. You can't have that. And the comic relief. It would work by recognizing key search words with speech recognition software, and then, in the same way, find relevant jokes for those key words. It's a lot like the annoying guy who took an improv class at the party.

Once you build this robot, Howard Stern will buy five of them and fire all of his staff. Seth MacFarlane would never have to work again. This joke machine could make five podcasts per day. By itself.

So I read in news today that Congress did thing. Congress is dumb and cow chicken. So today I was drinking a beer with my wife. Take her, please. And we had a argument about my child and my cat and the President of the United States.

Have you been over to Gary's house in a while? Oh, this is the fucking robot in the corner that just tells Polack jokes all the time. Fucking Gary. Fucking Gary. Fucking Gary. Poor Gary. Gary and Linda. All the jokes she'd said on Polack.

Okay, so that idea is terrific. RZ? Thank you. Sand hates your idea, but I liked it. What does sand just kind of mean to the people? So there's a section that we're going to skip over

here, which is spineless people, which is fun. I would love to invent that. No, it's a whole section on spineless people. But we're going to skip over that because we have a miscellaneous section to get to, but the document is up on thefbl.us

available for viewing there. But, boots, photosensitive condoms. I mean, I guess you don't really need to read much. That's about what you got. I'm a Stalin-lad.

Stalin-blast. Your best Russian accent. No. It's a photosensitive condoms. Oh, that is his best Russian accent. A condom with a special photosensitive polymer, which contracts when there is no light. Thus, upon insertion into the

orifice of choice, one's sensation is greatly increased. Oh! So at that point, it's like having on a really tight condom. If it's like the rubber, I'll fade it. I want to strangle my dick to death. Is that possible?

Just, yeah. It's like docking a pet's tail, only it's with your cock. It's fine. Portex, time for you to make a choice here. Never mind. Nope, no choice.

Never mind. No, no, my choice has been taken from me. Portex, you know what you have to read, and read it. I'm all for a woman's right to choose what stupid shit on the internet she's gonna read, and I'm assuming I'm being forced to choose the last thing I put on it. Uh-huh. Yeah. Alright.

Yeah. I'm Angel Incognito! You don't know which angel I am. I could be Michael. Probably not have, like, Angel in your name if you want to be incognito. It's kind of a giveaway. And my idea is retirement first. Okay.

I say the first 40 years of our lives we are retired with plenty of money to travel and enjoy life. You know, say I'm under 40, so, you know, just saying. Then we can work for the next 40 years. Coincidence. By the time I'm old enough to retire, I'm projecting at age 75, I'm going to be too old and tired to enjoy my time

off. I'm also not a fan of the five-day work week. Who came up with that? This is probably the copiest idea. All right. Adam, I need you to make a choice here.

Which of these inventions do you like better? Do you like the cloud hat, or do you want to end all capitalization? I want to hear about the cloud hat, please. Cloud hat. Okay, here is the cloud hat. It's the cloud hat. I thought of this when I was

playing golf on a hot, sunny day. This sort of weird idea popped into my when I was playing golf on a hot sunny day, this sort of weird idea popped into my mind because of the terrible heat that day. So I had a heat stroke and came up with a new idea.

I envisioned a cloud hat. Why not make a small floating cloud that would just be hovering above your head which would not function like an umbrella or a cap. I think I'm melting. You're a snowman and you need

a little snow cloud above your head. This would be hassle free because you hands don't need to hold the umbrella. And for people who don't need to hold the umbrella. And for people who don't like wearing caps slash visors can benefit from having this cloud hat. I was talking in a sleep. their heads. I'm not sure thou

of the type of material that can be made to this cloud. Maybe it's dead. He's leaving! He's leaving! Bye, Adam!

I melted. Being put under. Goodbye. Now that's a true performer right there. The very last section that we have here is something that Lady Frenzy put together, which is a user spotlight on a

user named TheGreenWagon. This week's user spotlight is TheGreenWagon. This week's user spotlight is The Green Wagon. He has quite a few ideas. There's a full list of his ideas. But we've pulled out a couple of these. So, Nutshell.

Boots here. For some reason in our recording, Nutshell's audio got cut out for the rest of it, so you're not gonna hear her anymore. Sorry. So, guys, okay, my name is also the Green Wagon, and, uh,

talk like a pirate day is unfair, okay? Not everyone had the privilege of living the pirate lifestyle. Talk like a pirate day is unfair, okay? Why? Not everyone had the privilege of living the pirate lifestyle. It's unfair. It's unfair that it's once a year. Let's make pirate day every day. In America, we have a special day to honor pirates,

which is called backslash, backslash, talk like a pirate day, backslash, backslash backslash talk like a pirate day backslash backslash people go around shouting arg and shiver me timbers and other such nonsense why we honor some of the most ruthless and sick people that the murder

and rape and steal and commit the most horrendous and unspeakable crimes is beyond me. But if we are going to have a day for pirates, why not one for other similar criminals? If you're going to honor evil, be fair about it. How about talk like a terrorist day? Or talk like a rapist day?

I'm going to drop a bomb here. Talk like a congressman day. Oh, man. Talk like a congressman day. Oh, man. Oh, talk like a drug dealer day. Talk like a crooked cop day. Talk like a serial killer day. So unfair! A serial killer?

I'm gonna cut open your face and feast on the insides. Ah, it's fun. That's a good costume. You are, I be a congressman from the 7th district. Do you have a first comment there to soften that edge? Yeah, okay.

I get emotional sometimes. My apologies to any honest congressmen out there. If there are any, most would say that honest congressmen is an oxymoron like a spam! Put the edge back on.

Green Wagon, you're just, you build it back up just to tear it back down. Like the talking like pirates, pirates didn't actually talk like that. That actually came from a pirate movie from a long time ago. Yeah. Like, no, it celebrates pirates! And it honors them! Literally, I've never heard anybody talk like a pirate

on Talk Like a Pirate Day. Like, years ago, this person was like, why isn't it Rapists of the Caribbean? Congressman of the Caribbean. Congressman of the Caribbean would be pretty good. My name's Guy Bruce Threepwood,

mighty drug dealer. My name's Guy versus Three-Bud, mighty drug dealer. What the fuck? Yeah, so Green Wagon has a whole bunch of more ideas, such as improved handcuffs with shock gel, ostracize murderabilia dealers, investigate murderabilia dealers. Investigate murderabilia traders. Discounts for armed train

customers. I don't even want to know what that one's about. And this one. This is also a crime-related idea. Portax. You like video games, right? No, I hate them. What fucking nerds? I'm into Sparks. Yep, so I'm the other head made of Green Wagon? I'm into Spirits. Yep, so

I'm the other head made of Green Wagon. I'm a Green Wagon. And video games for prison inmates. Okay, yep. GTA got him in there. Mario Kart's gonna get him out. I was saying...

Literally, will a Mario Kart get them out? Hop in, no one gets them out of here. What a great prison break that would be. That would actually be. And I found redemption on the Rainbow Road. There should be a series of specialty video games designed for prison inmates. These games would occupy their time and could be used as a reward for good behavior.

Pretty sure this is actually already in, whatever. Embedded in these games would be a philosophy that rewarded good behavior, as opposed to every video game ever made? Whatever. So, Noah's Ark 3D? Don't give them Bible Adventures. They will fucking riot. So was Noah's Ark 3D the game that was unlicensed

so you had to stick any other working Super Nintendo cartridge in it to make it work? I thought you meant like get the license to the Bible. Whoever owns the right to that is kind of a dick, actually. They got that on lock. Some of the encouraged behavior would be cooperating with authorities, helping and being helped by other races, other interracial cooperation,

helping the innocent, helping the weak, helping the unfortunate, emotional bonding with victims. The philosophy would be gradual and subtle. No gore, no mayhem. Okay.

Okay, so you... So a cop tells you to do something and you do it. That's your game? Yeah. Tattle. Yeah, it's like my armband says, what would Link from Legend of Zelda do? They would be designed By top game designers

To be exciting and playable I don't know that they would I love it when my games are playable I like exciting non-playable games Which I believe are movies Oh, you mean Metal Gear Solid? Yeah, Metal Gear Solid. And this new Batman game.

And might even catch on in the general public. Yeah, yeah. We can only hope. That's... That's... What a sand thing. I don't play video games, but the main That's That's What does Sam think? I don't play video games but the main drive

I guess is that games are fun Okay Is it for fun? No it's for business People who like, users who liked this idea Also liked legalized consumption Of dog meat There is the very end of

this document. Lady Frenzy has three ideas that are bonus ideas that weren't what I expected when I read the title. No, dear. Those are quick erection shelter, traffic light vibrator, and tap cum soap

dispenser. Whoa. Whoa. Let me just... Oh, God! Son of a bitch. Can I talk about moon metal? Oh, yeah, please. I think you probably should.

I love moon metal. Yeah, I'm Butterfly. Yep. Hello. Hey. I've been wondering about the moon's magnetic polarity. If it does create a repulsion from our planet Earth?

For such a long time now, it has no sign of colliding on our planet or on any moon slash moons on their designated planets? If for any reason that all statistical analysis

gets on track that this situation does exist on repulsion theory, then we can safely conclude that any material brought to either place, a possibility for levitation can be exploited.

What? for levitation can be exploited. What? So do you think that it's worth it to go back there to sample materials in the moon's surface to check on prospecting metal elements for extraction? It's funny that you mention that, because I was just thinking about

something uh called fly like a bee when a tuning fork is hit with a rod its prongs vibrate with a certain frequency attach light lightweight wings to the tip of the prongs and the wings would vibrate too with numerous such high frequency prongs with wings fixed on a vehicle on all its side, hitting the prongs at the central point at regular intervals should make the wings vibrate, and hence the vehicle should be able to fly like a bee! That's not how bees fly. But sure. It should work!

It should work, so it does! So, F+, what have we learned from Why Not? Nothing. Yeah, I don't know. As is the nature of the website. Yeah. You got so many ideas, you didn't learn anything? I guess we learned that there are stupid questions.

But wait, we already knew that. Yeah, we're relearning the same thing we've learned every time we've done an Idea episode. Maybe that's what we've learned, though, is that we've learned that we've done this podcast for so fucking long that we've stared into the abyss and nothing can shock us. Did you see that this guy wants to elect a fish for president? And be like, yeah, I can buy that. Probably. At least he didn't fuck it. Yeah.

Well, yeah. probably at least he didn't fuck it yeah well yeah um common common themes in ignorance uh seem to be um people having absolutely no idea how flotation works that's that's definitely a joke many people are having just like like they're just like make it float. Just make it float. I wish that was flying. Flying, similarly. Just, I don't know, put wings on it or whatever. Make it fly. The sound of nutshell gulag speaking. Yeah.

Yeah, and then, like, electrocute, like, things that I don't care for. And frustration at Pringles cans. Man, just, whoa! just can't get through my day how the fuck do i get that shit this is a threshold where they just become unreachable don't understand how do i get these i can't if i If I tip it, then I look weird. It should rise to meet me. Like, because we could assume that, like, you know, somewhere there's some sort of email for Pringles or whatever. Do you think that, like, there's just a person whose job it is to just read everyone's frustration and ideas?

Somebody operates Pringles' goddamn Twitter account for a living. Think about that. That's true. Yeah, the brand manager for Pringles. Of all the stuff they don't respond to because, like, why bother? You know, knowing that there are, you know, like, half a dozen different, like,

Kickstarter and Indiegogo products to help you dip cookies, I am surprised that just now I have not been able to find a getting the last Pringles out of a can assistant. That is a super big surprise. Kickstarter failure project. Yeah. Yeah, because Dunkin' Oreos has spawned all sorts of ones.

Yeah. Yeah, the website is always THEFPL.US and, oh, is there a forum? I forget. Is there a forum? Boots, is there a forum I forget is there a forum Boots is there a forum yeah there's a forum thanks Boots bye there is a forum go ball pit oh yeah

uh huh ball pit. Oh, yeah. Uh-huh. Oh, shit. Someone's pissed. Everything's fine. Don't freak out. Everything's fine. Don't freak out. Everything's fine. God damn it. Son of a bitch.

That's all over the floor. God damn it. Son of a bitch. Shit. Piss. Fuck.