The F Plus - 198: Strong Body Feeble Mind

Episode Date: December 20, 2015

Fitness is important. I just typed that onto a keyboard after waking up with a hangover, smoking a cigarette, and then sitting in a chair staring at my computer screens for a couple hours. Sorry, what I was I talking about? So this is a bodybuilding episode. It's pretty funny, but I'm having a lot of trouble writing an episode summary for it, so I'm just gonna type into this box for a little while and then just publish the episode like this. This week, no homo.

After your satisfaction, y'all both smoked some weed, and you told them you thought that was hair until it peed. I don't mind the fight. I don't mind the fight. I'm a fighter. Get pumped, listener, because this is the F Plus Podcast. A terrible place. There's terrible things. They're red with enthusiasm.

We've got Boots Reingear. What's happening in Japan to cause this sharp decline in marriage rate? Is it just them being alpha? John Toast! After my first few days on keto, I had very vivid dreams of eating bagels like they were potato chips. After about 20 to 25 bagels, I would say in my dream, oh shit, these have carbs. BORJACKS!

Thanks. BORJACKS! You take your dignity, you mix it in with some eggs, and you drink it, it's a good source of carbs. Adam Bozarth! Emu oil 100% Shit's forking, beautiful as fuck Very slight smell Keeps face naturally moisturized all day

With natural oils that are derived from emu skin Hence oils Emus are majestic And lemon Fuck you, it's just a simple question you fucker idiot If you don't want to answer it, go fuck yourself Get out of here. I'm a beginner, not a troll.

Emus are majestic. We can be too. We can be majestic like you. Hey, F-Less. Hey, Lemon. Hello, Lemon. I'm the fire. It's called an elevator. So how's your bulk these days? Are you bulking up? Are you getting toned? I'm bulking out. I don't know what that means. Is that a sex thing? No, I'm going more out than up.

Well, I think that what I have for you today is an episode and a document that's going to improve your personal health. All of our personal health, all of us in this room, we're going to get more fit, more healthy. I know that all of us, we spend a lot of time in front of our computers. It's not the greatest thing for posture, for eyesight. There's problems.

To that end, based on a document from Udo and Montreth, we are going to be going to bodybuilding.com. Okay. I'm already an Adonis, so I kind of don't need this, but fine. Because the people on bodybuilding websites look at, well, they have views on a whole bunch of topics. So we are going to start off with Jazzy, and that's you, Adam Bozarth. And you have a question about your training regimen?

Why are my Jiu-Jitsu Gamate arm bars uncomfortable on my nuts? What am I doing wrong? Well, they're not nut bars. Let me elaborate. Okay. If I'm not wearing a cup, I almost always end up putting uncomfortable pressure on my nuts. Asked other people at the dojo, and they don't have this problem. Well, it's not...

It's uncomfortable the way you put pressure on your nuts. Just shoving your hand down there all the time. Making everybody else uncomfortable, too. So I guess I... Looking it up here, a Jujigatami armbar is like a wrestling move. So he's getting...

He's in wrestling matches with people and then there's uncomfortableness on his nuts. Okay. Well, I'm... So he's saying, should I wear a cup or not when I wrestle? Yeah. That makes sense. Fine, sure. What do you think, Ben?

I'm Ice Mancle 1. You are an absolute faggot for using Japanese terms. And that's faggot with a P-H because he's a phone freaker. Slurs are okay if you spell them differently. I got banned from using dial tone telephones until I was 18. That's awesome.

There's a whole country of people that speak Japanese, right? Absolute faggot country! Alright. I don't use them for anything considering those pussies fucking suck at jujitsu. The Japanese

fucking suck at jujitsu. Oh shit, I used the Japanese term. Guess I'm a faggot. Oh no, it's spreading! Are you asking about rolling arm bars? If you are, and you have a problem of applying pressure to your ball sack as you are actually applying breaking pressure to the arm. You need to pinch your knees

together and trap his elbow against your inner thigh before his elbow actually reaches your balls and then you feel more pain than he does. Then you feel more pain than he does. Alright, terrific! Could you illustrate this with like, airplane safety icons? And then he says,

and stop using those faggots, also with a PH. Japanese terms, it's annoying as fuck, also with a PH. Okay, cool. The forum cursing filter does not know what to do with you. He's so clever, you guys. That's how he got rep power

of 323. Or maybe he's like a redneck It's annoying as pahook An absolute pahaget Well We'll keep in mind That makes sense And lol I'm just trying to describe the arm bar

Saw it called that on YouTube Here's a screenshot Of me sleeping In a man's armpit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The guy. The guy. Wrestling's easy if your opponent is asleep.

I don't know where the nuts come in, and I guess... Okay, cool. I hope it works for you. Sorry I was such a dick in my response. I just hate the Japanese so much. Oh my god! Here's my chance to redeem myself.

It just annoys me when I hear the language used to describe moves that were revolutionized and perfected mostly by Brazilians. Sure. Why not? That paid off. Alright. Also, later on I say the words

disgusting elephant balls. Oh. Well, has to be expected. I say the words disgusting elephant balls. Oh, okay. Well, it has to be expected. I'm not giving you any context. Okay, so we're actually going to take a quick break before going back to bodybuilding.com because we need to go to T Nation. That is T hyphen Nation. It's a different bodybuilding site.

This one is orange on black, so you're welcome. Yay. Oh, good. And my name is Jasmine Carr, and my avatar is like a sheik having sex with a pig. Okay. Second life. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. This is a thread where you write about the people at your gym that you don't know and never talk to and give them nicknames. Oh, fuck. The squat rack curl thread, but with people, right? Oh, yeah. Got it. Cool.

Okay. All in good fun. This forum is not what it used to be in this regard. Wait. Calling people names regard? Okay. Okay, so let's give it a try. MrMuscleConfusion2000. He's a guy with a ponytail, not good at it. Not good at having a ponytail? Sucks. Fucking amateur. It's sideways. Whoops.

He actually has a buzz cut. Met him a couple years ago at another gym where we talked about weightlifting. He told me it's hard to confuse the muscle every week. It's hard. It's hard. He seems to do a pretty good job at it. I see him now five years after. Hasn't progressed at all.

Probably still trying to find a way to confuse his muscles. And then there's the guy that nicknamed himself Godzilla. Can't say too much about this one, because if he sees this, he might recognize himself. Even if I doubt he reads in English, must be too demanding. Regular fat juicer without real intensity in the gym and no leg training. Has a Facebook page with his name, with a wordplay with Godzilla and his name.

Hmm? Yeah, that's what he has. Oh, yeah. Sometimes wear a... It's a big fucking dinosaur juicing all his fat. Yeah, and then like an explanation of what the diagram is. Fat juicer. What does that mean? or juicing all his fat. Yeah, and then like an explanation of what the diagram is. Fat juicer.

What does that mean? It's a fat juicer. Juices his fat. Juices his fat. And then juices things? Or does he juice fat? Or does he drink the juice No, he's a fat juicer. How much clearer

do we have to make this? Look at this guy. You see he's fat juicing. Okay, so that's my guys that I noticed, but Portax, you're Diddy Rider and you noticed...

I always am. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're riding that Diddy. Ha, ha, ha, ha. You're horny. Let's do it. Ride it. Ride ha. Ha. Ha. You're horny. Let's do it. Ride it. Ride it. My ditty.

So, Adam, Prince of Eternia. Guy who looks a bit like He-Man before he transforms, aka Prince Adam from whatever, always tries to stare you down. If you stare back, he adopts a cartoonish smirk. Swishes his towel around as if it were nunchucks or something, and once threw it at my feet in what I assume was some kind of challenge.

I say so! I challenge you in this exercise hall. Sometimes bursts into four non-blonde socks. Does bizarre stretching and workout. Consists of tricepssets of treadmill, lat pulldown, and the crunch machine. He's a known

quote-unquote character around town and has been kicked out of a few gyms. Seemingly unemployed but affluent, nobody knows what his story is. Fabulous secret powers were revealed. Yeah. When he held aloft his

thing of creativity. His towel. Yeah, he held aloft his thing of of his towel yeah the power of gray skull i am an alcoholic uh and then uh john you are going to be cherry bomb yo what's up i'm cherry bomb hello daddy i have a few characters in my gym it's small gym, but has a long history in my town and has been various gyms for 30 to 40 years. It's been various gyms, okay. Wait, what was that? It's had a lot of identity crises. For 30 to 40 year-long years.

What planet are you from? Years. Those years have been working out, bro. Years long years. What planet are you from? Those years have been working out, bro. Years on years. Needless to say, there was such a long history, it has collected some interesting fixtures. I like repeating myself, apparently. You mean like coat hooks, or? The ethnic Swede.

Is that the electric slide? That's my favorite dance move. What ethnicity is the sweet? This man is a bodybuilder. Dark as a meatball. Always wears sweatshirts and sweatpants, even when it's 110 degrees Fahrenheit outside. Age unknown.

Like a blood typo! Emotionally dark as the movie Meatballs. What is this like? There's a lot of white people in Meatballs. While most bodybuilders I've known spray tan before comps, this guy must sleep in a tanning bed. Either that, or he's pushing melanotan. Melanotan.

Oh, I think that's a thing. To the extreme. Very nice guy, though. Does he not know black people exist? Is he like... I like the unintentional racist that's just looking at all these black and tan people and being like, wow, how did all these white

people get these weird tans? And now the next person is the ultimatum. Mid to late 40s, nice physique, probably ex-military. Oh, he's a dish. He's got like dating profiles now. And single. Oh, he's a dish. He's got, like, dating profiles.

And single. Oh, take that shirt off. First time I met this gentleman, he complimented my squats. Then he told me that he squats heavy every day, to which I blurted, Dear God, why? Why? Then he told me, Suppose someone told you you have to double your squat in 30 days,

or they would execute your whole family. Would you squat heavy every day to double your squat in 30 days or they would execute your whole family would you squat heavy every day to double your squat in a month and save your family well yeah sure if you're an idiot you'll do a lot of stupid things my family has been kidnapped by german perverts somewhat strange first encounter but sure loves lifting and is also a very nice man yeah these are real archetypes that everybody can relate to in every gym. There's one of these in every one. Yeah. The Jack Bauer with muscles. Papa Bear and Baby Bear. Ooh, that's going to be...

Papa Bear. This is a certain type of gym. Papa Bear has tried to teach Baby Bear the ropes of lifting. Papa Bear always wears his lifting belt for everything. One-fourth squats, curls, peck deck, everything. Shopping, doing laundry. Doing his taxes. A night out on the town.

Papa isn't weak, per se. However, he still walks around with his chest puffed out and a grave expression on his face like the Undertaker. I imagine him telling Baby Bear before they enter the gym, If you want to be a man, son, this is how you do it. Hey, poor Tex. We got through the words peck deck, and you didn't make a Magic the Gathering joke. I don't play Magic the Gathering, nerd.

It cuts into our fucking Nintendo time! Yeah, it does. Oh, snap. Strength Splatoon, bitches. So this document once again put together Yudo and Montreth as a tag team, so thank you to both of them.

And it is broken up into sections. Section one is sort of a general lifting section. Section two is called Eating is Hard. Agreed. Mashed potatoes in my eyes all day, every day. So you guys thought we could get a little bit of time before another recipe, but you're wrong. Oh, yay.

Because this thread is called Post Your Favorite Recipes. Good, good, good. Oh, boy. Okay, so we're just going to each take a recipe here. Due to public demand here is the recipes thread. Try to include as much info as possible. Yep. Pussbile.

It's my favorite recipe. I want to... I eat. I'm taking Bulldog 13. All right. So, yeah, go ahead. Take it. Tuna shake, baby. Shake that tuna, go ahead, take it. Tuna shake, baby!

Shake that tuna, you little bitch! No me gusta! Everybody, shake that tuna! Here's the keto version. Two six-pound cans of tuna in water or oil if on body opus diet. Ooh, do I grow extra limbs on that diet? On a body opus diet. Do I grow extra limbs on that diet? On a body opus day. Two cups of water.

Four large ice cubes. Blend until smooth and creamy. So, cold tuna. Okay. That creamy water. Is this the Super Bass-O-Matic 76? Yeah, it is. That's great bass.

That's terrific bass. That's terrific bass. Fuck me, you're right. This is a must for any hardcore lifter. That is also the regular version. Same, but with milk. Boo! Wait, the tuna in the milk? Or milk with the water?

Boo! I think it's tuna and... Yeah, with milk instead of water. Yeah, with milk instead of water. Black. Well, alright, fine. If you don't like that, then, poor tax, read the one that Sobolik posted. Alright. Just made

this one. Protein pancakes. One cup oatmeal. Eleven? Okay, yeah. Eleven goddamn egg whites. You gotta save that last one for luck. No, because then the last one is one whole egg. Oh, fuck, you're right.

You need twelve whites and one yolk. There was no fucking escape. And one packet sugar-free Jell-O, flavor of your choice. See options. Options? What? Simply stir together in a mixing bowl. Cook on a frying pan using fat-free pan.

49 grams of protein. 54 grams carbs. Complex. Now, you read that as mm-mm, but I read that as oh! Oh! Well, you see, that's the lady that I clubbed over the head and drugged by her hair over to my house. Lemon's right. You love protein pancakes, don't you, lady?

Lemon's right. That is how that's written. John, you had a problem with Boots' recipe, right? I did have a problem with that. What's that? I'm a little strong man. Pat me on my head And then what? If you are not too much

Of a tuna fan Try this Mix a can of it with some french dressing And some salsa and just eat out of a bowl Eat it out of a bowl like a dog The dressing and salsa Mask the tuna well It's the only way I can eat the stuff

Which I do because it's so cheap and easy Just eat it right out the bowl Just the dog bowl I guess I'm homeless and live in the gym literally The shelter only gives me Cans of tuna, French dressing, and salsa. Oh, God. I don't know. It's something about it.

I just don't really like the taste of tuna fish. I love the taste of French dressing and salsa together, though. Salsa! You know what cuts the bumblebee? The French dressing. Hello, I am Capriccio Hey Capriccio What is pineapple?

Anyone got a pick? I don't know what it is because I'm from Europe Why not Google image search pineapple? No, he's in Europe My name is Battery Required I also didn't like your recipe, Boots. If you can't stand the taste of tuna like me, but it is the most loaded as far as protein goes with no fat, then put two cans of tuna in a blender with a can of Caffeine-free Diet Coke and liquefy.

Boo! The Coke masked the tuna taste for me. Sure would. I've heard that in a book. Listen, just chug it down quickly while your nose is closed off. Stinks horrible, but it's an instant hit to your

system with protein. I do this at least twice a day, normally when I am pressed for time. To vomit? How are you on this site and don't know how to spell protein? Of all the words, you can spell wrong. Don't worry, guys, I'm heavy lifter. Oh, hey, heavy lifter, what's up?

I tried this today. One can of tuna. One fourth cup mozzarella cheese. And one slice of Kraft Sinley's cheese. Fish and cheese. Fish and cheese. Cook the tuna in the pan and put the cheese over the tuna and microwave it a lot better than

straight from the can. Boo. So all these guys are getting together and they're like, okay, fucking tuna fish is super good for my protein, but I don't like the taste of tuna fish. Literally, what other foods exist? Diet Coke.

Not pineapples. French dressing. Not pineapple. Purple stuff, Sunny D. It's like a magic mushroom. It says, just put a whole bunch of chocolate in your mouth, and you will taste it. And then, Adam, do just put a whole bunch of chocolate in your mouth, and you won't taste it. And then, Adam, do you have a recipe out of this?

I don't. But Alan Fred does! Okay, what's up, Alan? I'm Alan Fred, senior member of Pre-Pepri Er-Sales for the sludge!

What, what, what? Oh, God, I don't like this double dare reboot I really hope Judge Doom gives you the dip You goofy cartoon 16 ounces of skim milk Okay not bad Two scoops in large chalk I don't know what that is

It's probably protein powder Then that's fine. You're fine still. I'll replace that with some pure protein and a Whey Gator chocolate and add some Hershey's, but make sure it's chocolatey. You'll see. Okay, it still sounds kind of gross, but fine. Four ice cubes.

Okay. And after that, peep this. A half cup oatmeal or more, depending on how sludgy you want the sludge to be. Sure. Ice cream, if you can take it. No. Ice cream If you can take it Now don't tell me

That don't have everything and more Everything a young girl could want Alan Fred The sludge 2005 2002 That was when this was posted Oh okay

Well it's the test of time That's why this was posted Oh, okay Well, it's done the test of time That's why this thread has 102 pages 4,744 posts It's 159 159 pages Could someone like Program a generator

Where you just pick from a drop down Of just eggs, tuna, ice cubes, protein powder, and that sort of thing, and then just put in bowl, put in blender, put in swimming pool. Fucking I don't care. I got actually an app idea for you. Okay, let's try this out.

So you know how there's like web tender apps and stuff like that where you can go like, hey, here's what's in my pantry. Right? And then it'll give you a couple recipes based on what's in your pantry. Instead, what we're going to do is you go like, okay, so here's what I have in my cabinet and or liquor, like my liquor cabinet or pantry. And then it just randomly puts a name on it and says cook it motherfucker or just statistically finds what has the most protein regardless of any other nutritional

information i would actually no i think i think do it on sodium instead oh yeah that'd be even better These guys are just Downing baking soda smoothies Alright, well we're About to get out of the recipes thing But Boots, you found one more you wanted? Yeah, yeah, I'm Fabby95 Hi Fabby And I formed Some fake abs on my stomach

With Silly Buddy Better than the marker option, I suppose So Fabby stands for fake abs on my stomach with Silly Buddy. Better than the marker option, I suppose. So Fabby stands for fake abs. Fake abs, baby! From Flabby to Fabby. And I've got egg whites pizza. Here's the ingredients for the base.

200 grams of egg whites. Right. The egg whites? Eggwives. Hey, look, it's eggwives pizza. The eggwives are approaching from the north. 50 grams of tomato sauce.

40 to 50 grams of onion. Salt and pepper optional. Ingredients for the condiment. There's tomato sauce. I'm sorry, condiment? The condiment. For dipping. You know, dipping your pizza. Yeah, some mozzarella light.

And then whatever you prefer. Tuna, olives, ham, vegetables. That's a good recipe! The neighbor's cat, you know, fucking whatever. Basketball. These guys must have awful breath. Tuna, eggs, and onions.

Tic Tacs, is that kind of Japanese faggot shit? It's okay, Adam, because while their breath is terrible, their personalities make up for it. Okay, how do I make this, then? Oh, you put the base ingredients in a blender. Then you fry that. And then you put the other shit on top. And then what happens at step four? When the base is cooked, and the condiment, and bake for another 15 minutes, or as long as you want, and eat.

As long as you want, which is zero. Bake for as long as you want, and then eat for as long as you want, I suppose. I will not. Pour into garbage can, throw garbage can out window. Okay, you know, this document does have plenty more recipes. Meringue is a good protein source I enjoy. And exactly what you need to build muscles I also enjoy. But instead,

we're going to read Sick of Eating. Sick of Eating? I am. My name is Bounty Killer. Sick of Eating? Damn, it's morning, okay? Nice breakfast, 12 egg whites, two yellow, some toast, orange juice, but sometimes I

get sick after that. Always the same foods during the day. Can only put so much French dressing on it. For six or seven meals, what do you guys eat all day long for weeks? I'm big, but sometimes get tired of eating and don't want to lose muscle. Portex, you are Peterby, or maybe it's Paterb? Paterb, yeah, you're Paterb. I'm

Pete Arby. Pete Arby, aye. I'm not sure what your lean body weight is, or what exact food, or what your exact food needs are, but 12 eggs in one sitting seems a little extreme. Nuh-uh. Unless you're very large,

your body may not be able to process 70 grams of protein in one sitting. You may want to balance your breakfast out a little more. A little less protein and a little more carbs. Maybe six eggs, some oatmeal, or a multigrain cereal. Oh my god!

What? No! I get tired of just eating eggs all day every day. Well, then eat more eggs, motherfucker. Just buy a fucking hen and just squeeze its ass into your mouth? Why the fuck not at this point? A little more variety would make it easier to stomach and save money as well. Good luck! Sorry, son of a bitch.

Can you imagine these people shitting? It must be horrible! I am now and I can't imagine anything else for the rest of my life, you fucking jerk. I think that must... Yep, me too. It's how they get the deepest squats is... is massive constipation. Hey, I'm Buff Gator.

Hey, Buff Gator. I, uh, hear... Uh, wrong here. I hear you, man. I'm sick of eating the same meals every day I eat when I'm not hungry, and I don't enjoy eating. It is a chore, but I still do it. I'm lucky, though, because I work at an all-you-can-eat buffet,

so I eat about three of my meals a day there, I eat about three of my meals a day there, and they have shrimp, chicken, steak, roast ham, potatoes, spaghetti, spaghetti, everything. I swear to God, every meal being eaten at Old Country Buffet Suddenly seems like the best option so far That was all one sense Hey It's Robert Eating is good Peace MVP

MVP Thanks Robert Hey hey hey Lemon What Ask me what my location is MVP! MVP! Thanks, Robert. Hey, hey, hey, Lemon. What? Ask me what my location is. What's your location, Robert? Southern Washington! Yeah!

Hey, hey, Lemon. Ask me how many body points I have. How many body points do you have? Three. I just want to point out that Robert's poster was posted on 2 a.m. Christmas Eve 2001. Holy shit. We're all a little shook up after 9-11 and Robert found his own way to express himself.

Christmas is bad! Peace! Hey, hey, hey, hey. Hey, what's up? I'm straight flexed. I'm the physique architect, by the way. Hmm? Fucking sure.

Okay. Heat does denature it, but no one is to say that the body can't refold it. I won't say that. I'll never say that. Well, my body can throw it down, flip it, and reverse it. Open the protein. Get on the floor Everybody walks a dinosaur

The bunny has chaperone proteins Which help fold misfolded proteins Back into your place, much like my socks Hey, hey, you two proteins Leave room for Jesus, alright The chaperone proteins Embarrass the carbohydrates Out of your system

Oh yay Barely carbohydrates out of your system. Oh, yay. Barely. And stop your fucking bitching about eating. Big Dog will agree with me on this one. Ain't that right, Big Dog? That's right. That's right. Several Big Dogs agree with me.

If you have never been... Can we call it to the dog pound? We're all probably dead statistically! We're just a ray of sunshine, this recording lemon. I sure am. Just as a human being, I kind of am. It's true. That's what it's like to hang out with me.

He's not wrong. If you have never been on a competition cutting cycle, then shut the fuck up! Wait until you feel what it's like going to bed hungry or counting the minutes until your next meal. You'll be begging for the bulking cycle. I hate whiners. Eating is the fun part of getting burned. Eat, psycho!

What, eat a psycho? So that was the bodybuilder equivalent of the starving children in Africa speech? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Somewhere there's a weightlifter who's at some part of his cycle where he can't eat. And Portex, how many body points do you have, Straight Flex? I have a measly 61,000 and 64 body points. Yeah. That's way more than Robert.

My eyes have become flexing biceps. Stray Flex was like, we're going to ring in 2002 tomorrow, but this being New Year's Eve, I'm going to just scream about food. Eat psycho, motherfucker. Eat psycho, 2002. Eat psycho, 2002. Eat psycho. Okay, and then one more food-related problem. This is, now we're gonna be going to Reddit.com.

Oh, good. Oh, no. My favorite website. Okay, so my name's deleted. I had a nightmare about eating bread. I counted macros in a dream. Are you afraid you'll get angel wings? No, not a wonderful fantasy dream about eating bread.

Oh. I had a dream, nightmare, last night that I was at this Asian joint that makes their own sriracha sauce. that I was at this Asian joint that makes their own sriracha sauce. I used some pita to dip in the sriracha sauce and ate it, but stopped until I finished the pita.

I freaked out in the dream and counted my macros and then I woke up! Counted your macros? Counted your macros? Yeah! Oh, where's my Excel spreadsheet? Oh, it's all there. Thank God. This is macro workouts.

When he sleeps, he does his macro workouts. And then, yeah, so obviously, you know, if you are a bodybuilder, then bread is, you know, I mean, obviously, like the devil. It's terrible. So, Vortex, you are Teresa the barista. Apparently macros is nutritional intake. Oh, okay, that makes sense. Teresa. So, Teresa the Barista, what dream did you have?

I am... I am Teary Saith Barrista, and I had a dream that I baked a French loaf and was tearfully eating it, apologizing to everyone around me with breadcrumbs falling out of my mouth. Dreams like this are common for people who are quitting smoking. They'll have nightmares.

They fail and wake up in a cold sweat about it. Definitely lends to the idea that carbs are an addiction. I kind of want to see a Vine video of Teresa the barista eating a French loaf and crying. I kind of want to see a Vine video of Teresa the barista eating a French loaf and crying. And then, John, you're Kelbell88. Kelly Belly. Hi, I'm Kelbell88.

I have been on keto for a little over a week now, and I've had three carb-related dreams. Okay. And I think because I am so new to this, when I wake up, I can't tell if I actually ate the carbs or if I dreamed it. It's really upsetting. I'm really healthy. I'm on the streets in a carb-fueled rage. Does anyone know if I ate carbs last night? First dream, I ate a donut. Second dream, I ate a donut. Second dream. Holy shit.

How long was that dream? I didn't think dreams could be more boring than they already are. Wait, what's the third dream, though? Guys, stop. What is it? You talked over my second dream. Oh, I'm so sorry. I ate pasta.

Okay, well, God, that would have been a shame if that was lost to the winds. I know, right? You're welcome. Third dream. I ate one Gobstopper. One. But they're everlasting, so, you know, it's a problem. I had a mini pack, like the kind you get at Halloween, and I ate one from that, but I was trying to hide it from the people around me.

I then looked at the carbs and saw it had like 40g for the one I ate and just broke down and cried. My BF laughed at this last one. Which now that I know it really was a dream, I think it is kind of funny. Easy. Fuck, man. This lifestyle sounds terrific. And like

maintainable? So that's all of the food section we need to get. What? Hey, you shut up. What? Shut up. What?

Why? We're moving on from food. We're not doing any more food. Oh. I'm Max Mania. We're talking about contest preparation. Okay, Max Mania. I don't want to.

I mean, I don't want to. We're moving on to body shit. Okay, fine. I'm not letting you do the category move. I'm doing it myself because I'm Max Mania and I have an embarrassing problem and I need help. Okay, Max. Yeah, hello everyone. Hello.

What's up? I've competed at six shows in the past two years. But every time I get up on stage, I get this humongous erection in my posing trunks. Oh, yeah? I am 13 years old. Oh trunks. Oh, yeah? I am 13 years old. Oh, yeah? I've tried everything to stop it, but it all comes the same.

I'm sure it's very noticeable and definitely costs me points. What's the judging system on that? Like, how many points do you get? Erection! Negative 25 points. Ooh, that's a... Oh on that? Like, how many points did you get? Erection! Negative 25 points. Ooh, that's a... Oh, that's a shame.

You hate to see that in a bodybuilder. Max gets a zero in boner suffocation. I have another comp in eight weeks, and I am scared. I don't know what to do. Please help. Just cut it off, mix it with the tuna, put it in the blender, and... Don't forget the French dressing. And the French dressing.

Oh man, imagine all the protein you get out of your own cock. What? Lots of people in forums that we've read. Imagine that, yes. And nobody provides help. Nobody

has any help to provide. Nobody's helpful on this forum as a rule. I'm a Papa Geos. What? I'm sorry? I'm a Papa Geos. It's so embarrassing, but can someone help, please? Please.

This local pizza ad is fucking weird. Can I get a pizza pie? Hey, I had a serious problem today. I went to the Waz Room. Waz Room. It was a room once. It was a room. I went to the Waz Room and did my stuff,

and after I was bleeding, I thought it was cause I eat too much or too much protein or something. So I'm really scared. I called Mountain Doctor. Hello, I am Mountain Doctor.

Climb me. Why did you call me? Because he was there. Please, I'm so scared. I'm so scared. I'm so really scared I called the Mount Doctor, but I want to know if maybe some of you guys had this problem too. I don't think anyone has had this problem, whatever it may be. Listen, it's not something to laugh at.

Papagios has a real problem problem and he needs a real solution. So, if I'm looking for somebody to solve a problem, obviously I'm going to look for Nugs the Ninja. Oh, I was hoping Finny Rider would come to my rescue. Finny Rider just says, wipe too hard.

But Nugs the Ninja has a solution. John, will you take that, please? Yo, I'm Nugs the Ninja. What's up? Man, just throw a few more apples in your diet and you'll be cool. If you guys aren't cracking out monster shit, monster shit fucks. Shit. You ain't eating enough. If you guys aren't cracking out monster shit, monster shit fucks, shit,

you ain't eating enough. Nugs the Ninja. Hey, I'm holding you by... What's your signature? I don't know. I'm just a doc on Google. I'll answer that question. Nugs the Ninja's signature is a professor of the world's second oldest profession.

Yeah, that's what I said. Streamline? I don't know what that is. Either ninjitsu or weed smoking. Video game streamer. So, Portex, every day you're still hustling, hustling, hustling. Don't you know it, buddy? You're still hustling 313,

and do you have a problem? I do. Yeah, what's your problem? Let's solve it. Embarrassed face? My problem is manual poop removal? Been backed up

for a week. Extremely bloated. Almost nauseous. What do? Well, stop taking Oxy. Hey, I'm Poopman123. Don't know how that feel. Goodbye.

No, no. I'm sorry. Did you? Wait, what? Don't know how. Sorry. Oh, shit. I'm Poopman123.

I'm back again because I fucked up the first time. Don't know that to describe yourself. Oh, shit. I pooped man one, two, three. I'm back again because I fucked up the first time. Don't know that feel. Goodbye. Wait, not goodbye. Not goodbye. I don't... Poop man, you have so much more to share about yourself. I think you have something bad.

You gotta tell us what your forum title is. Your forum title and your sig of boots. You gotta get into character method this. Alright, I pooped man one, 2, 3. I'm back again to tell you a bit about myself. I poop 4 to 6 times a day. Serious. Seriously, guys. Seriously. Alright, Poop

Man! Yep. Pooping is a lifestyle. Poop Crew. Hover over the random toilet to work Quads Crew. Hasidic Ass Crew. Wipe 5 times Crew. Rip sass hair out while wiping Crew. Toilet paper gets stuck in Hasidic ass crew. Wipe five times crew. Rips ass hair out while wiping crew. Told him never to get stuck in Hasidic ass crew.

McFreako crew. Check out my body space. I do not like Mattis Yahoo's new music. All of the crews have the same members and it's just that guy. Mods nagged me for AVI.

That makes sense. Yep. Hey guys! I'm Webslinger. I'm a tight ass motherfucker. Right? Right? Merciful God!

Is there a cure for protein farts? The Oscar clip is amazing. Death. Only death. Lately, my whole family has been staying away from me because I have this nasty gas. I never thought it smelled that bad until just now. I was typing an essay for school, which took like an hour or so behind the computer in my room.

I went to the kitchen to make a snack. I'm bulking. And when I came back, I couldn't enter the room. I'm surprised I hadn't suffocated when I was writing the paper. Jesus Christ, that smell! That is a shame.

Please tell me there is some way to stop ripping ass all day! Stop going to Taco Bell. Rip 24-7, rip ass crew. Seriously, it's like rotten eggs injected with sulfur and poo. If not for the sake of helping a friend, give me insight so I can stop ruining the ozone layer with all this methane.

My anus is stretching as I type this, so hurry, guys! What? Whoa. Too late for it already, Threadbrook. I'm dilating! Giving birth to death gas right now. It's crowding. In the document here, From Udo and Montreth has 36 pages, and so that was the thread. In the document here, From Udo and Montreth has 36 pages.

And so that was the thread. The next thread is titled, Help Me Combat Z Protein Farts. And then the next one after that says, just a note from them that says, There are 98 search results for protein farts. And 81 results for protein farts spelled incorrectly. Oh my god. Protein farts. Protein fart. I can't believe spelled correctly was the winner there. Protein fart birds?

To be fair, though, you would think that the misspelling would win out, because it's really hard to type when you're having a protein fart. Makes sense. So, there's some stuff on sleep that looks really fun and

some stuff about masturbation looks fun as well. But instead, we are going to skip down to the no homo section. Oh dear. And Adam, your name is Jericho786 and you are dashing.

Okay. So congratulations on being so dashing. What, like right now? Like he's running and typing at the same time? It's either that or read bodybuilding for him. I'm Jericho. I'm Jericho786. I'm dashing.

My first title boner for a guy. Stop laughing. Stop laughing. Stop laughing. Is it awkward sometimes to get a slight boner when you look at a hot male like sometimes I do when I look at male models? No homo. Yeah, yeah. Quite a bit of homo. Just a dash of homo. Let me yeah. Quite a bit of homo. Just a dash of homo.

Let me explain myself. I ain't talking about a huge bald-jadding erection. Right. Just a slight twitch on the cock. I feel like, I feel this sometimes. Anyone else get it? Is it gay or not?

It's a little bit gay. I'm gonna go to a bodybuilding forum. Talk about the erections that I get when I look at men. You know, when you're looking at male models like you do. Hey, it's only... I just like to think he's looking... Well, I don't like to think, but... I bet he's looking down at his cock like,

uh, uh, only a half chubby. I'm still straight. Oh, shit. I'm fucking excited about the prospect of hearing Boots Reingear attempt a Razor Ramon accent. This will be horrible. Yeah, it will. And it's Razor Ramon spelled like the Ramones.

Oh, yeah. Hey. I am Razor Ramon. Today I'm gonna do a buddy slam. Well, it can't be worse than that, Boots. The test is if you have a boner, if you look at a guy, it should be deflated within 30 seconds.

If it isn't, well, you want to put it in him, basically. 30 seconds. Okay, so start the clock. Yeah, egg timer. Lol, it doesn't go huge, dude. It's just kinda small twitch. And when a gay guy

tries hitting on me, I tell him to back off because it's sick so not homo, right? My name's Grifter 619. Yeah, I get that twitch too. I pinch my cock to make it go away, though. No, no. Bad gay cock. Bad gay cock.

Bad gay cock. You go back. Glad I'm not the only one, but I can't help it, guys. I'm not gay. But sometimes dick goes up for some reason. Some reason. It's a fucking mystery. Man, throughout all of these posts, you've been not gay. Congratulations.

And then, uh, John, if you'll not gay. Congratulations. And then, uh, uh, John, if you'll take the sugar daddy. I'm the sugar daddy. I'm banned. I think you got the erection by fantasizing about the guy's figure. I hope it wasn't his ass.

Or else you're in big trouble, dude. Lol. Well, I mean, if he's gay and he fucks him, else you're in big trouble, dude. LOL. Well, I mean, if he's gay and he fucks him, he would be in big trouble, dude. I just can't get out of big trouble, dude. Big trouble and little asshole. Just want to check to see if that porn exists or not. Big trouble and little dude.

It does not! Start oh hey i just quit this podcast i'm gonna go make my first million this uh i just wanted to mention uh one of my favorites uh my favorite ever gay porn titles was uh uh it was a mexican uh gay title and it was um it was uh two guys and they were in uh one was in a red t-shirt one was in a red t-shirt, one was in a green t-shirt, and the movie was called Super Barrio Brothers. I thought it was going to be called Feliz Navidad. Swing your cup from side to side. Fuck one guy. Let's do that Mario All together now

Okay Porno update brought to you by Squarespace Not a law firm Not a mattress company And if you want your Gay porn read to you You can go to Audible

As long as you don't do it on Squarespace Great And if you want your gay porn read to you, you can go to Audible. As long as you don't do it on Squarespace. Right. I think we got to make a choice. I don't want to, you know, there's so much gay panic in here. We can't do all of it. So we're going to have to make a choice. So, Boots, which of these two gay-related threads on bodybuilding.com

would you like to read? Being gay is genetic. That's by Easy Gainer. Oh, dear. Or, how in the flying fuck does bodybuilding make you gay? That one.

Alright, how in the flying fuck does bodybuilding make you gay? That one. Alright, how in the flying fuck does bodybuilding make you gay? Your name is Schizo Mark, misspelled. What? Schizo Mark. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm Schizo Mark.

And how in the flying fuck does bodybuilding make you gay? You know know i've been through several other forums that have no particular topic and people would ask what kind of hobbies posters had so i'd naturally post working out well i've been to a forum on a thread with no top. Make it felt good to log out of the forum. I lift heavy things and then I eat eggs. That's what I do for fun. By the way, my farts smell horrible.

And then the whole lot would gang up on me saying I was a moronic, I was and moronic buffin' who was gay because only gay guys go to the gym. What the fuck is that? Anyway, flames, rants, comments, go ahead. Let's all fight each other. Against gay people?

Then we'll tickle. A buffoon is a really buff buffoon. It is a cold hard fact that bodybuilding is expensive. Much like the gays. Between supplements and the gym, one can spend over $100 a week. This is why many bodybuilders get bad reps because they do gay porno for money.

Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh, of course. This is my favorite plot to a porn movie. Yo, bro,

I got all this protein and all this workout equipment. I just have no money. You know of any way I could earn some extra cash, bro? I think I have a way. I have a friend who might want to meet you. He's into protein farts. Hey, my name's Jeff

I got these super great eggs dude I got some tuna wanna mix it together uh and then John you are big red HH man fuck fuck fuck fuck like that pisses me off

I know Arnold was offered a free trip to American free gym membership and other of the sort if he let some dude pork him in the ass. He didn't, though. I was offered like a thousand bucks to do gay shots from some weird-ass company.

Um, no. My ass is exit only. I'm no sausage factory worker. Mm-hmm. Your much protesting is exit only. I'm no sausage factory worker. Mm-hmm. Your much protesting is really great. Yep. I'm just in all these spaces with all these gay people, and they're always hitting on me just all the time.

Just, oh, my God, it happens so often. Also, I do gay porn sometimes, but it's not what you think. Listen, I know what it's like when I try to pick up women. I'm not going to let a man do that to me. And then, Portex, finish this up with Asian Invasion, please. I'm Asian Invasion. And let me ask everyone a question. Okay.

Would you do a straight photo shoot for 50 bucks or a gay one? The only difference is tat you know gay guys are jerking off to it, but other than that, it's exactly the same for $100. So we're just going to need you to pose right there, just lift your arms. And by the way, gay guys are going to jerk off to this. Yes, exactly. What the fuck? That wasn't in the contract! I don't know what it's like to just post random pictures and then have people jerk off to it.

That's how pro bodybuilders start out. They think it's just a little different than straight porn. Then the companies offer them like $300 if they can put another man next to them, no touching. Once again, it sounds okay for the money, so they do it. Yo, yo, Oosie, where I'm going? Yeah, yeah. Fucking homosexual bait and switch, totally.

No, it's homosexual gaslighting. Totally. We're just gonna put him right next to you, and now we're just gonna put a sailor hat on him. Just a little sailor hat. It's a slippery slope right onto a dude's dick. It happens to the best of us. It gets worse and worse, and will continue unless more

money is spent on BB Contensed. What? Less more money. I think they mean Contents. On BB Contents? Hey y'all, I'm BB Contents. Bodybuilding Contests? Oh yeah, unless more money is

spent. Okay, yeah. Yeah, Contents. I think you're right. Bodybuilding is dying due to steroids and gay porn. It's getting right out of the pool. Of course. Of course. Also, gay porn is dying due to all the lube.

Gay porn is killing the bodybuilding industry. Yeah, exactly. It's not feeding it. It's bulking it. Yeah, exactly. It's not feeding it, it's bulking it. Anyway, too much negativity. Damn. If anyone here becomes a millionaire, they better say-tart putting more money towards

bodybuilding. Like at the bodybuilding foundation? Yeah, just the concept of bodybuilding. I spend all my money and time making sure my body is one of the most physically attractive bodies on Earth. That's great. Terrific.

I don't want that. Not to men, though, right? Oh, God. Oh, my God. Wait, do men have the same, like, ocular nerves that women do? Look, I only want to bring pleasure of my attractive body to only women. Obviously, yeah. That's how it works.

Like your weird, freaky, bloated body that is all bubbly and strange and off-putting. You want to make that attractive to women, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. See, that's why the straight photo shoot costs so much less, because they have to spend that money on a group of people to go out, and any time a gay guy is jerking off to your pictures, it's like, snatch it out of his hands and run away.

Also, if the straight photo shoot and the gay photo shoot at the beginning of the scenario are the exact same thing, what makes them... They say gay guys, but gay guys could jerk off to the straight photo shoot if it's the same picture. off to the straight photo shoot if it's the same picture. That's sort of what he's saying, is, like, at the very beginning of it is, like, it's just a regular photo shoot that a gay guy could jerk off to. But that's any photo shoot ever! No, no, no, no, no, no.

You know how, like, when you download pornography and then you open up the pornography and then you have to hit that checkbox for, like, which sexuality you are when you masturbate to the pornography? Yeah. No, no, no. See masturbate to the pornography. No, no, no. See, here's the thing.

The first one is just a normal nude photo shoot. The second one has a lot of blingy-style gifs that all point to him and say, gay and gay as fuck. I'd watch that. That sounds great. And then you put a little blunt on him, and then there's Snoop Dogg doing the real motion in the bottom,

and then there's a cat smoking weed, and the dog smoking weed. That would be so great if it was in straight porn. That would be so good. Can we get that on OffBeater? Sometimes you just contact Blingy. Listen, I have your new growth venture. It's terrific.

Listen, I have your new growth venture. It's terrific. I gotta say, this episode has been a lot of fun. Yep. Like, I really like, you know, all the different categories we went through. Yeah, you feel like the categories probably covered every topic that you would want to read about, right? We got the recipes, we got the gayness, we got the, like... Pretty much covered everything, right? That's the two things we're talking about on this podcast.

Surely there can't be anything else, can it, Lemon? Oh my god, you're not, no. You're not saying what I think you're saying. It's time for poetry! Yes! Yes! Hello?

Yeah. Oh my god. Bulkverse. By the way, best intro ever, Boots. That was terrific. So elegant. Adam? You are JZ 33055. Yes.

Hey, where are you located, JZ 33055? Miami! Miami! Go squat poem! Check it out. This poem made me cry. Sob, sob.

Why? I'll show you. I'll tell you why. This is, I think, written by Dale Clark. It's called Squting okay okay way down this road in a gym far away a young man was once heard to say i've repped high and i've repped low no matter what i

do i with my legs won't grow he tried leg extensions like curls and leg presses, too, trying to cheat these sissy workouts he'd do. From the corner of the gym where the big men train through a cloud of chalk and the midst of pain. Midst of pain. Midst of pain. The midst of pain. Are you going to add, like, five more syllables to the next verse, too? We'll see. I'm feeling the burn of the

scansion here. It gets a little bit more Springsteen-y. Okay. Where the big iron rides high and threatens lives, where the noises is made with big 45s and deep voice bellows as he wrapped his knees. A very

big man with knees with legs like trees. You still think it's Springsteen? No, not anymore. No, it's a mug description. Laughing as he snatched another plate from the stack, chalking his hands in his monstrous back. He chalked his hands and he

chalked his back. Right, yeah. Yeah. You know. Well, I guess he's gonna deadlift, so he's having fun. Not for gay reasons, though. Said, boy, stop lying and don't say you've forgotten. Trouble with you is you ain't been squatting.

Hi, I'm John G. That's badass. I'm Tom. That's funny. What the fuck? End of thread. What the fuck? End of thread. What the fuck? What happened? And why were those guys so delighted by it?

It was badass. It was funny. It was right. It was badass, right? Yeah. John, you want to go be nut gay somewhere? Yeah. Can we roll around in chalk and drink tuna?

Hey, guys. Hey, what's up? Hey, I'm Buddha? Hey, guys. Hey, what's up? Hey, I'm Buddha01. Oh, Buddha01, what's up? What do you have? I'm Butthow01. Butthow. And hey, how's my bodybuilding poem?

The one, did you... Hoisting this barbell from the ground is a journey I embark on all year round. No time for vacations for obvious reasons. The true buddy builder is always in season. Oh god, is that gonna shoot you? Now the seasons will change throughout the year.

A few pounds of fat while bulking is nothing to fear. Oh! Oh god! That line smelled like that other guy's fart. And I heard the clatter of eight bulking reindeer. Is nothing unheard of if you know how to train. This desire I have to continually return is unexplainable.

I love the burn. Because when there is sweat on your back and chalk on your hands, there's no better place this is real man's land damn it I rub my glands no homo everyone else rubs my glands

I just love it if these poems that like just have all the obvious rhymes if they just stuck like a nonsense line in there just to have a different line and with all this chalk on my hands, then for no reason I thought of shifting sands. That would be way more interesting. I curled my weight into the air and where it fell

I did not care. Roses are red, violets are blue. Bulk up, goddammit! And how are you? To have the strength, dedication, and desire, you must be born with this bodybuilding fire. A fire that only continues to spread. Soon bodybuilding is all that occupies your head.

So you mean syphilis, right? Yep. Those poems are about... My hobbies are bodybuilding and syphilis. You can't wait to get that next iron fix. So while I finish the set, I began. Right? See?

Wasn't that way more interesting? Desire fire, spread head, iron fix began. Listen, you're shitting all over my wonderful last line. Oh, God, I'm so sorry. Yeah, just think to yourself, are enough man? Are enough man? Are enough man?

No. More man to add. Add more man. Add more man. Are enough man? Add more man. Add more man. Stop trying to kiss me. Where are all these men coming from? Are enough men. Add more men. Add more men. Stop trying to kiss me.

Where are all these men coming from? Add more men. Are enough men. Add more men. Are enough men. Are enough men. Are enough men. Take this Facebook quiz to find out if you are enough men. So, F+, what did we learn from the bodybuilding forum?

Seems like these supplements are doing a wonderful job. Absolutely, yeah, yeah, yeah. Mind, body, and soul. I've learned that being a fat nerd is actually way easier than the alternative, so I'm all for being me. Oh, totally. I've been saying that for years. Guys, they don't do this because it's easy they do it because it's hard

and they look they seem to make it as hard on themselves as possible yeah yeah like if people want to do this kind of thing i don't get it but if people want to do this kind of thing and just you know protein load and carb you know i'll do all that kind of stuff fine if you feel better if it makes you healthy whatever but these people have taken like what on the perp on the face of it is like seemingly healthy ideas and then like made it the unhealthiest thing yeah in the world at least mentally well i've learned that like in a if i find myself in a situation where i need to force feed myself tuna at least i have a few options i don't know if you guys have ever if you guys have ever done like like a thing like where you have to change your diet drastically

or you have to just start exercise for whatever reason and like you get you temporarily feel the effect and you're like you know and then you start looking down on everybody who's like making decisions you used to make a month ago right i feel like that's what it is when you're a bodybuilder but everything you do is healthy because you thought of it like you know like right like eating tuna shakes is healthy because well i work out so i'm healthy right yeah yeah yeah i mean yeah because because this um because this, I think it feels like culturally the hugest drawback to everything that these people are dealing with is that it's completely male. And so any time that you have a culture that is that strongly male, that is completely without feminine influence, and that it is only dictated by Y chromosomes,

everyone's the biggest fucking retard in the world. It's true. I never do anything stupid. Emotions run wild. If I was running the bodybuilding forum, things would be different. I'll tell you that right now. Well, yes, that is true. If you were running the bodybuilding forum,

it would be different, see? I want to see, I want to live in that world where Portax is the leader of this particular, these forums. Like, they all go to her. Nothing about this makes sense, but I guess this is what we're doing. But yeah, I mean, you get in those things like, you know, the homophobia

and the competition and just the stupidity that, you know, with any sort of male-dominated culture, is part and parcel of what happens. And also, I think, and I know this is probably a strong statement, but I think the bodybuilders might be the worst poets we've read. Oh, yeah, for sure. Yeah. No. Joyce was pretty bad. Joyce from Space was pretty bad. Yeah. No. Joyce was pretty bad. Joyce from space was pretty bad.

Oh. Space of Joyce. Now, come on, Lemon. Why'd you say the thing you said? Then you went and gave a guy some head. Oh, damn. I got, oh, and shit. Yeah, I gotcha.

I gotcha. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They really might have, like, no sense of humor, though. I don't think that, like, any of this sparks of having any sort of sense of humor or sense of fun about yourself. Actually, on that point, so my kid is

three and a half right now, and that means that she says poop and butt a lot. Sure. Because that's what comedy is. I learned it from watching you. So it's like, knock, knock, who's there? giraffe, giraffe who, giraffe poop. That's a good one, though.

That's a joke. It is, except for I've heard it a lot of times. But I feel like that's the level that these guys are operating under, of just like, fuck, gay, shut like, fuck gay. Shut up. Fact. I, yeah, that one guy immediately just got upset cause somebody used a Japanese term.

Yeah, exactly. Uh, the website is always T H E F P L dot U S. Uh, we got a forum and I don't know some other shit. Um, and,

uh, uh, some of you people, uh, have been, uh, donating to the podcast through the PayPal. That's wonderful. Thank you very much for doing so.

The contribute page will always have what we have and what we're looking for. Thank you so much. Bye! Goodbye. Bye! Oh, God. Easy gainer. We're almost done.

She thrust it so far down her throat, it pierced her where a man has a scrote. Oh god, fuck off. What? It pierced her where a man has a... Okay, so... His penis went all the way down... So far down her throat. There was a second person holding their scrote on top of her shoulder.

Yeah, that's what I was thinking. I thought it went all the way down that it poked a hole so that they could insert a scrotum into that hole. Okay. And it would be where a man has his scrotum. You know, it's a confusing thing

to say, but that's the only way to get that throat-scrot couplet. You know, the perfect rhyme there. Which was clearly worth it, yes. You know, if we were reading early 90s Ice-T lyrics, we'd be having the exact same conversation. Yeah, except for without the cover art.

Which is really a failing on these guys' parts when you think about it.