The F Plus - 24: Violet, You're Turning Violet, Violet

Episode Date: May 28, 2010

The internet is awash with the peculiar fetishes of peculiar people. Often times, these fetish websites will host photo and video of the behavior being performed for the amusement of its visitors. But what happens when a group of people has a fetish about being force fed helium until they turn into a giant sphere, and are then popped? Well, presumably they have some difficulties in their lives.

Music Hey there, welcome to the F Plus Podcast. My name's Lemon. And I'm John. And John, how do you feel about balloons? Oh, well, balloons are fun. You know, you go to the circus and they make little balloon animals and, you know, get your kid a balloon. I mean, I don't really like them. I don't buy them for myself, but, you know, I got no problem with balloons.

So you like balloons? Is that what you're telling me? Yeah, I mean, I'd say I'd like balloons. I don't know if I'd hang out with a balloon, but, you know, I like them. Do you like-like balloons? Uh, um, well... Do you like balloons? Do you ever crush on balloons? Uh, you kind of... It's a safe place, you can admit it. Well, do you have a crush on balloons?

It's a safe place. You can admit it. Okay. Yes, I do. Excellent. Well, this is the podcast for you. Really? Yes.

What we have this week is body inflation fetishists. Oh, I see where you were going. Wow. Yeah. So what we have is a group of people who are really into body inflation. Now you may remember a number of episodes before we had feeder fetishists, people that

overfed other people. Oh, right. Yeah, they were fattening them up and getting them super fat and pushing nozzles full of chocolate cake into them somehow. Right, and this is similar. This is people who are being made bigger from air, from actual being inflated by air. Oh.

Well, okay. Well, I mean, how does that, does it like one particular organ get filled up or does it just inflate their stomach and then that's it or? Oh, boy. You're thinking really too then that's it? Ooh, boy. You're thinking too intelligently about this. If you put air in a thing, it gets bigger. Ah, so the people

are balloons here. Right. Eventually they're going to pop, right? And there's no way they could derive sexual pleasure from them popping, right? You would think so. You would think so, but that's a part think so. That's a part of it. That's a part of it. And there is, of course... I'm really

regretting this fetish I'm pretending to like now. I think I've gone down a wrong imaginary path. And yet, now you're forced into it. You're already part of the community. Damn it. Okay, I'll buy some nozzles, I guess. Let's get to our readers. In the room tonight, we have Acer Aquatel.

I ain't finished getting big yet. Vortex. I'm my own parade float. Bunnybread. Oh, internet. Jimmy Franks, Esquire. I like forced full-body inflation, preferably with a helium tank or bike pump. Jack-Jack. I'm just trying to pretty Amazon

to deal with you, Citrus. John. This is good beer gas. Isfahan. Currently cyber-squatting on BalloonJuice.com. Stog. Oh, the New Yorker rejected

my slip-non-inflation fetish fanfiction again. And Lemon. If you wanted to inflate me, just wondering how it would be done. Would it be against my will? Would you trick me into swallowing something

that would blow me up Willy Wonka style? Or would you insert a tube up my butt or into my mouth, etc.? Liquid or gas? What would I be wearing? Would gas escape out of me in fady face? Would I explode big eyeball face? Cartoony slash re-slystic. Please don't be shy in your details.

Thanks. Please don't be shy in new details. Thanks. I would like to point out that the ranks on here are different types of inflated objects. Oh, you're right. Miss Balloon is a party balloon. Oh, that's great. You're a parade float. I'm a parade float. That's what happens when you post enough.

You turn into a parade. And when you're a starter, you're a soap bubble. Alright. R&B1, soap bubble. I would get you to wear a sexy little lycra body and shiny

leggings and boots. We would go to a top nightclub. Very busy one. Oh, the top nightclub! It's a well-known nightclub. Very busy one. Oh, the top nightclub! It's a well-known nightclub. Next to the well-known fluid place, I think. Yeah.

Grandma, no! Where a friend of mine worked the bar. Halfway through the night, I would slip a pipe down the back of your leggings and... Halfway through the night. So, how's it going?

So, you know Jay? How do you know him? You gotta get the chit-chat out of the way. You don't just... One hour in? Hey, you know, this is going pretty well. How do you feel about this tube? Can I kiss you another gimlet? Oh, fuck, it's nine o'clock. Boop!

Wait. Keepop. Wait. Keep going. Oh, please. Halfway through the night, I would slip a pipe down the back of your leggings and up your butt. Yeah. This pipe is fixed to a cylinder of beer gas.

I just see some fat biker going, bleh. Beer gas. Beer farts. Yeah, what the hell is beer gas? It's a can that says beer gas on the label. Once turned on, you steadily

inflate, pushing people aside as your body expands. When you become a mega hourglass shape, I would pull the tube out of you, then a loud breaking wind sound, followed by you shooting off the glove as your

body deflated. Yay! That's great! I love that mental image. I don't know how to react. I literally don't know how to react. Then after that happens, like, does anybody else smell beer gas? I am Lisa Inflation.

And I'm also a soap bubble, so we got that in common. Now, in my opinion, inflation is best with explosion. LOL. Do the signature. Inflate me. Pop. Oops. Hee.

The short answer is belly inflation via helium. Thank God he didn't give us the long answer. I'd have to say a more private setting. Oh. Clothing worn doesn't really matter to me. As for the method, it would be shoving a pipe

slash hose in your mouth by surprise and filling you up with helium all over and eventually you wanted to get down. I'd yank the hose out and you'd blow around the room deflating. For some, remember? I think I walked into the wrong cracker barrel here. Let me go.

He's sitting in a rocking chair on his porch whittling a little wooden balloon figure. What's that? You'd like to know about my inflation, Fetish? Well... No, what the hell. I'll give it a shot.

I wouldn't trick you into it. See if you'd like to be a balloon. I'm a simple man, so all I'd ask you to wear is a tank top and shorts. I'd inflate you slowly with a tire pump. I'd put the hose into your belly button.

Then inflate your belly till it's the size of a beach ball. Then the hose that splits into two. Inflate your breasts till they're each as big as your belly. Then I'd have it where we both on a couch with you on top of me as I rub your belly and snuggle into your breasts. This is more fun. I could use you for a flotation device in a pool. Paint your body, inflate you with helium until we're both on the ceiling. Of course, if there was something else you wanted to do in your inflated state, I'd be more than happy to help.

Then, when the day is over, I'd inflate you till you're a big, comfy bed for me to sleep on. If I misread on what you wanted us to say, I'm sorry. No, you hit it to a T. That's exactly what I wanted someone to say.

Belly buttons do not work that way. Woody Allen's movies are getting weaker. I would like for her to respond to this being like, it's not what I wanted at all. I'm not that kind of girl, pervert. You're sick. I'm a Darth Clone

19 and I'm a Zeppelin. Oh, shit. 1,100 posts. I'm floating high in this crowd right here. I'd get you where you least expect it. Shove the tube in your mouth and blow you up with helium

until you are parade balloon sized. If helium starts coming out of you, I'd put tape on your nose and a cork up your butt. Tonguey face. I'd like to point out... And I'm sorry, but you wouldn't get out of it to tell the tale.

Winky face, kaboom! Oh my god! Wow. Oh, there is a hot in here. I'm gonna die. Winky face. Wow. This guy has a deviant art account. Hello?

I am Retrobane, and I'm a party balloon. If I were much more damoneering than I actually am, I still want to get to know you first. Assuming everything worked out, I'd try to surprise you with inflation

via a tank of some inert gas with the hose in your mouth. You'd be wearing whatever you like, as it wouldn't matter after a certain point, though I do prefer but butchier modes of dress. I'd be wearing what I normally do, a tight

where it counts, low-cut top with my incredibly boring and ill-fitted jeans. What? He's painting such a beautiful picture. And then you get past the Mendoza line. Don't want to get your expectations up too high here. My jeans are kind of boring.

Gets points for honesty, I guess. I'd wear a low-cut top that accentuates my best areas. Also, my jeans suck. I'd take you out for dinner. Of course, you'd have to pay for it. I'd gently run my fingernails over your taut skin as your body filled out gradually. Stomach first, then breasts, legs, and arms until you're a helpless fear. Clothes destroyed long ago.

Metrobanes are romantic. Chaos would escape out of you but only when I wanted some. Hey, can I get some gas real quick? You got a lot, right? You can share. I just take the hose out of your mouth and

take a bit and take a bit letting myself get more or less to the size of a nice big beach ball as far as my stomach's concerned and my breasts would inflate their natural state of ample bastard balls clothing be damned.

I'd want to steal some directly from your mouth by encouraging you to give me some, but that sounds even more like cheating, even if this is all okayed for me. I'm not understanding all of a sudden. What? Yeah, just now. This makes no sense. No kidding. You would also totally pop.

I'm sorry. I just need to see what happens for my own purposes at home. What? He is completely off in his own world at this point. I'm thinking maybe he thinks that she's not talking about a fantasy, and he's just medically interested in what would happen if a person pops.

I think it took like four tries to write this post. Once per paragraph, and then a Kleenex. Oh, a new keyboard! You'd kind of lose the narrative flow. Oh, a new keyboard! You'd kind of lose the narrative flow. I'd use a pox-o-vigant needle after running my hands along your

huge frame just to see how tight your skin is from all that gas inside you, and you'd go with a deafening BANG! And nothing left but a non-inflated you'd go with a deafening BANG! And nothing left but a

non-inflated you. Nothing. Man, that's deep. Yeah, I'm still having difficulties meshing my desire for popping with, I do not want to star in or make a snuff

film, and that this topic is more or less the reverse of what I'm into. But I'd probably never make a, how would you inflate me, topic. Wait. Confusing post. Wait, you gotta read the sig before we discuss this confusingness. Myself in three words. Killer. Alien.

Vagina. Wonderful. Whoa. The other random words. Okay, so the post says it's like an inflation fetish site, and the post says, how would you inflate this woman? And then the guy ends with, this is more or less not what I'm into. This is the opposite of what I want.

He's into sucking air out of people. He's a deflation fetishist. But then how would the air get in the first place? Well, he's into inflating the woman or whatever and then herself also getting inflated at the same time. Oh, okay. And then, like, I don't know, they would have inflation lesbian sex or something. I think

Rachel Arbain is just coming to grips with her fetish. Inflation lesbian sex would be bouncing around in the ceiling. Trying to get to each other. Yeah, that would be awesome. She has that practice, though. I mean, she's a party balloon, after all. She's no rookie here. Glob Slob mean she's a party balloon after all She's no rookie here

Globslob, he's a party balloon Where's my dick, Blatt? Am I right, guys? D slash K Or am I? Wow, we'll never know I'd like to point out that Globslob's

I'd like to point out that Globslob's post count is 69 And he quit in 2005 So he got to 69 posts. He's like, there. Oh, yeah. Yeah! Yeah. I did what I want to do.

He floated away into the sky. For the last five years, he's just been going, Weedly, Weedly, Weedly, Weedly, Weedly, Weedly. I am a posting legend. I'm double integral, the beach ball. I would inflate you with air via a hose in your mouth. I am a posting legend. I'm double integral. The beach ball. I would inflate you with air via a hose in your mouth. You would start off in relatively simple clothing, just a t-shirt and some khaki shorts.

But those would be in tatters after your body's become spherical in a few minutes. Just to let you know. But I wouldn't stop there. Your hands and feet would have to go too. You would keep plating larger until there's nothing left of you except your head, and your body would bulge up around it so you couldn't even move it. You would keep getting bigger, 20 feet, 50 feet, 100 feet, until I am satisfied that you are big enough.

Oh, God. Alright. I would then hire an army of personal assistants to tend to your every need. Well, of course. Except for the need of wanting to move around and have a life, I guess. And not explode. Yes, and not explode.

Even the most insignificant of tasks has a dedicated staffer assigned to it. People to prepare your meals and feed them to you bite by bite. Someone to change the TV... I guess I'm feeling this guy has a lot of disposable income. Yeah. Personal assistant fetish.

Someone to change the TV channels, turn pages, or hold your cell phone up to your face. I guess he could call for help. Talk into it. No, don't say that. What do you say on the phone? Say what I want you to say or I'll pop you. I swear to God. At this point, isn't your face

so stretched out? Your ear's going to be up at the top and your mouth's going to be in the middle. He just said the rest of her body would be up around her face so she couldn't move her head so someone would have to crawl into the hole, stick a cell phone next to her ear. Cell phones can be pretty good these days. Maybe if she shouts enough, it'll still be good.

You guys are thinking way too much about this. I'm sorry, this is just so complex and multi-layered. I'm not getting the whole picture here. My suspension of disbelief is shot. I'm sorry, this is just so complex and multi-layered. I'm not getting the whole picture here. My suspension of disbelief is shot. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Broken my brain. Five seconds later.

I'm perfectly fine with retrobane, but this, this is ridiculous. Apparently. An entire crew would be devoted to your body, making sure you receive regular baths and massages, and lotion is applied daily to every inch of the blimp that you are so that your tightly stretched skin stays moisturized.

Oh, that's not going to be the least of the problems with your skin. Moist your balloon fetish. Dry balloons are not sexy. Only moist ones. Hey, recreation team, we'd roll you and bounce you around so you can get some exercise.

Exercise doesn't work that way. We want you slender, young lady. Come on, work on that. As long as you're moving, that counts as exercise. Don't want to go for a run? Just get in the car and drive somewhere. Just skydive.

He wants tone. He wants tone. run just get in the car and drive somewhere just skydive and it's like a running marathon he wants tone he wants tone oh christ okay someone man or woman whichever you prefer would make sure

that your sexual needs are being met as well my god oh lord I'm not going to be doing it I guess needs are being met as well. My God. Oh, Lord. Now you're another slave to fuck her. I'm not going to be doing it. Yes. Oh, God. This guy's really uninvolved in his own sexual fantasy.

Yeah, I know. He's a fire and smoke kind of guy. In his wildest dreams, he's just watching. Yeah. No one else would watch. Even this is just the tip of the iceberg you would not pop you would not pop

unless you wanted to but your sexual assistant might exploit the threat of such as a device during foreplay because nothing is nothing is hotter than the threat of instant death for example indulging in a passionate kiss

while lightly tracing your tender skin with the very tip of a needle or a woman riding your crotch wearing stilettos. What? What? This person also has a DeviantArt account. We could spend 45 minutes on this person alone.

Good lord. Alright, alright. Bunnybread, I think that you have a very classy individual coming here. Oh, okay. Well, then he deserves a very, very classy voice. Yeah, yeah. This is a Hefner kind of guy right here.

And I mean Hefner during the 60s, not Hefner today. Oh, God, that TB does stand for tuberculosis. I'm TB Tabby. I give you a glass of a tasty beverage. While you're drinking, I tie a rope around your ankle, tying the other end to a heavy weight. As you wonder what it's about, you notice your body's starting to expand. I reveal that you're just drinking

tall glass of balloon juice. Ah! Nice! Great rubber! I can't even do the arts to make a people's ass or anything. This is balloon juice.

I thought that was going to go in a completely different direction. It's capitalized, which means that it's like a trademark. Yeah, exactly. Don't you be stealing tippy-tappy shit now. He's a mad scientist. Oh, what's this? Oh, damn it. It is purchased. But it's a mad scientist. Oh, what's this?

Oh, damn it. It is purchased. But it's squatted on. Oh, balloonjuice.com? Balloonjuice.com, yeah. Wait until the patent gets through, then he'll open it up. There's still balloonjuice.us. Don't worry. Not for long. And you're in for a very relaxing experience.

As you puff up, you begin to feel very light on your feet. And realize what the rope is for. Slowly you leave the ground. Fabric tearing and buttons flapping all the while. You stop and play when your body becomes a sphere with the hands and feet sticking out. Safely done it. You sway gently in the breeze. Feeling light as a feather.

Just as I promised, it's a very relaxing experience. Touching, touching. Needless to say. Wait, needless to weigh. Needless to weigh. Needless to weigh. Needless to weigh. I enjoy it too.

I'm content to just watch you float. But I might give you a playful foot tickle. With an SEP. With a slow deflation bringing you down to earth. Safe and sound. No popping aside from buttons. No buttons. No.

Poor buttons. Hey. No, no, no. Buttons is an inflation Poor Buttons. Hey! He's a cat. No, no, no. Buttons is a inflation fetish whore. My name's Dagger Guy, and I'm a party balloon. I would sneak a secret formula into your drink. You'd start to feel funny and start to have orgasms, possessive, more powerful than you ever felt.

orgasm-s-possessive more powerful than you ever felt. God, this thing is its possessives building up inside you quickly as it can't escape, so you're left with the option of stopping your immense pleasuring or pop.

That's lazy! Read the sig. Don't try Don't try Why? Don't climb the tree if you can't run naked through the kitchen. What?

Your lucky numbers are 1, 17, and 3. Just like Mom always used to say. That's my favorite Mad Lib. Don't climb the tree if you can't run naked through the kitchen in bed. Too many possibilities to consider. I'd like to try so

many different ways, but I only have one shot because everyone I play with ends up popping. Oh no, he's a cereal popper. It must be a hell of a job to clean up the crime scene before the cops arrive, though. Nobody seems to talk about all the, like,

guts and shit that would happen if you actually popped somebody. Because that's not sexy. I don't understand how human anatomy works at all, don't I? Fair enough, fair enough. Hey, shut up, shut up! I'm gonna inflate some intestines, alright? Well, it's like those people that

are into women getting eaten by creatures. They never think about how she dies in the process. Just like, oh, she comes back. I've been eaten, yay! Oh no! Oh, acid!

In those Vore ones, doesn't the big animal usually shit them out? Well, sometimes, but sometimes they just appear later on perfectly healthy and nothing... as if nothing happened. Any kind of place like this, you're going to have subsets. People who are into this,

but they draw the line at that, oh my god. He'll stick a tube in his mouth and fills you to bursting, but also making you eat, however, always up to the outbreak. Inflate-H-Hur. Miss Balloon, I would love to tell you how I'd inflate you. I'd inflate you to my place for a nice dinner and a sexy movie. I'd ask you about your interests

and among them, inflation. Once talking about how much it arouses us, we have a moment of favorite styles, mine being full body. Going into my room, I would ask for you to wear a lovely low-cut black nightgown.

Afterwards, I just happen to have it ingown. Afterwards, afterwards, grab my vacuum. After cleaning it out, of course. Of course. He's a gentleman. He's not some slob. His vacuum is clean.

And put on either two rubber nozzles, one for oral and the other for anal, on the other for anal, on the nozzle. Okay, can I break it off for one quick second? Have you noticed that they always go in either the mouth or the butt? Yeah, there's no vaginal action going on here.

I guess, does that upset the science, if it was in the vagina? Well, if you put it in somebody's ear, it could do some serious damage. Asking you to, number two, either open your mouth or bend over, I would place the hose

in you far enough to not pop out. Turning on the vacuum in reverse mode, I would watch as you grow like a balloon from your belly to your breasts and in time watch as your nightgown stretches with your expanding body, accentuating

your lovely curves. Positive dissonance. The vacuum would stay on and fill you up with air, making your entire body start to inflate until you become a full round spear with two big orbs for breasts. Your nightgown would stay on

tight and straining to stay on your ever-growing body. What? It would, all right. It just would. It's like how the Hulk always keeps his clothes on when he turns into the Hulk. So you guys have no problems with people being randomly inflated, but you do have problems with your clothes.

What? Ew, nudity. My suspicion of disbelief is this isn't working for me. Yeah. When you become a big spherical balloon, I keep the vacuum hose in you to make you inflate just a bit more

until the only thing's poking out from your body are hands, feet, your head with puffy cheeks and two orbs on what was once your chest. I keep the vacuum on until your body was starting to inflate over your appendages and your head where your balloon body

would start to take up the room and your nightgown on its last stitches. That's where I would turn off the vacuum and pull out the hose from your mouth or rear. And not until... Not a moment's too soon. Nope, nope, nope. The nightgown's still holding up.

Not yet, not yet. Okay, now. After that, I would say you look beautiful and give you a deep, passionate kiss on your lips. After that, it's private message material. Oh, because then it gets hervy. After that, it gets hervy. Then itiley. Oh, because then he gets her. After that, it gets pervy. Then it gets romantic.

No, first he gets romantic, then he gets pervy. Throughout this, I would be rubbing your body, feeling you expand and inflate like a balloon. So, Miss Balloon, what did you think? Smiley face. Miss Balloon never responds to any of this. Well, Balloon was just an FBI agent, you realize. Holy God. All right. Do we want to try this?

Do we want to try this script? Yes. Scene. People sit calmly in a waiting room reading magazines or watching daytime TV. A receptionist types furiously at her computer. In the background, a female scream of agonizing pain echoes through the back hallway. A young brunette walks in the front door and approaches the reception counter. Can I help you, miss? Yes. I'd like to die, please.

Ah, well, you've certain... The sudden sound of a firearm discharging down the hall causes the receptionist to flinch slightly. Certainly come to the right place. Do you know how you'd like to proceed? What do you offer? The usual. Stabbing, burning, hanging, drowning, starvation. What the hell? For also Brow in thought.

Don't you have something a little less boring? How about a firing squad? Hmm, not bad. Anything else? Checks her daily calendar. Actually, one of our newest specialists currently has an opening. I believe you will find her technique sufficiently unusual. Zam Room 19, the one with the double doors.

Thank you very much. As the brunette makes her way down the hall, she can hear a man gasping for breath behind one of the closed doors, while a knife is being sharpened behind another. Reaching the correct door, she opens it to find an unusually large exam room and a middle-aged female doctor standing next to an exam table, picking lint off of her white coat. Somewhat startled, she turns to face the door.

Ah, yes. Come on in. Have a seat on the table. How are you today? She sits with legs dangling. Pretty good. Great! I know time is important, so this won't take very long. Retrieves an air hose connected to the oxygen port on the wall. If you would, go ahead and lie back on the table.

Lift your shirt up a little bit, and then hold this against your navel. The brunette does as instructed, pulling a t-shirt up to reveal her flat stomach and pressing the tube against the deepest part of her belly button. The doctor secures it in place with medical tape. Are you ready? This won't hurt a bit.

Not that that matters, I suppose. I'm ready. Okay. Okay. Thank you. Thank you! The doctor turns a small valve

on the oxygen port. A sudden foosh! Followed by a steady hiss or audible. The brunette feels her stomach tighten, and within seconds, it is already bulging out considerably. Whoa. Just relax! It's hardly over yet.

How is that a stage direction? I... notice it. to happen any moment, but failing that, she unbuttons her jeans to relieve some of the pressure that her stomach is applying to her clothing. How is that a stage direction? I notice it. Claudia, start speeding off here. All right, Brunette, now expect some Jack Chick likes it. Pause for laughter.

Sorry. Oh, God. Alright. That's not a bad idea. Your clothes could become pretty uncomfortable fairly soon. Confused. Just how much of more will this

be? A lot. Breasts beginning to swell. Is it okay to stand up? If you so choose. The brunette struggles to sit up with her added growth, then stands awkwardly

trying to shrug her jeans off. The jeans were on her shoulders. No, jeans were like a bad feeling that she just had to shrug her jeans off. Jeans were on her shoulders. Yeah. Oh, she had a bad feeling that she just had to shrug off. She's like a grandma. She pulled them all the way up to her shoulders. Strapless overalls?

With those falling to the floor, she manages to pull her shirt up past her doubly large bosom and remove it entirely. No longer so restricted, her entire body begins growling, growing all over. She's growling now.

Arr. Arr, I'm full of air. Arr. I'm a bear with jeans on my shoulders. Inflating bear. She barely unclasps her bra before her arms balloon up until they are difficult to move Turning the valve again Let's speed things along

Shall we? Reflecting the fast air flow The brunette's body swells like dough in an oven Her significant round stomach is bookended By generous breasts above And massive thighs and buttocks below As her volume increases rapidly Her abdomen asserts itself as the dominant feature, gradually

absorbing its neighbors. What? That's what happened to my sister. How many of these have you done? Obviously, I studied for years. Inflation school? Yes, inflation school.

A normal college that had an inflation degree the diagram of the human body at inflation school is just you know that the cutaway view of the human and it's just a big pocket of air no no no it's more like one of those you know technical schools like ITT tech yeah

you can learn inflation who would believe we would be inflating these women tech or something. You can learn inflation. Who would believe we would be inflating these women? Okay, guys, you just need to tighten the stomach on patient three. Obviously, I studied for years in school and have dabbled with other practices, but you are my first, believe it or not. Really?

No, I never would have guessed. The brunette's underwear finally rends itself from her increasingly globe-like form. Breasts and buttocks disappear first, followed by arms and legs. Her feet leave the floor and she rolls backward helplessly. Her shoulders bloat up and overtake her neck, leaving her flesh bulging beside her face. And now for a reading from Vincent Price Beats Off. Oh, shit. Oh, God.

This is certainly not boring. No, it isn't. He's worked my death. I mean, really. This is certainly not boring. No, it isn't. It is. It is worth my death. I mean, really. The doctor lets the brunette continue to expand for another minute or two, stopping the airflow once she approaches ten feet

in diameter. The brunette, unable to move or see, doctor... Oh, sorry. Oh, sorry. No, no, this is... Yes. Wait, aren't I supposed to burst? Why did you stop? Well,

here's where you have three options. You can continue to inflate until you explode, or I can poke you with a pin, or I can add some helium and let you float away. I've almost wanted to be caught in the jet turbines of an airplane. So, like, how big is this room? So she's, it's a sterile.

It's bigger than a normal exam room. She'll fit in a fucking 10-foot-wide corridor. It said right there that it was bigger than a normal exam room. It's self-cleaning, I guess, too, if she's going to let a person float in it. There's a drain in the floor. You just hose it down after you're done. It has to have a skylight, too, if you're going to let her float away. No, it's like on Dexter. Everything's just coated in plastic.

I think it's worth mentioning. We're going to get the big denouement soon. Let the man speak. No, I think it's worth mentioning that it's bigger than a normal exam room is just about the same attention to detail that he's provided to the entire rest of his

descriptive text. Let's just get to the inflation part. Alright, she's in a room. Anyway, so getting bigger with her. Let's just keep going, I think. Alright, I'm twisting the valve

again. Oh, I'm sorry. You were. You are correct. Very well. In the meantime, before our time runs out, do you have any feedback for me? I would certainly like to improve the process for my future clients. Steadily filling up the exam room. No, I have no complaints. This is very unique, and you work quite efficiently. So, you would recommend this to someone else? Approaching her limit.

Absolutely. I would be happy to. Suddenly, the inflated brunette bursts, showering the doctor in the exam room with a rubbery bits of flesh. A few seconds later, and once more, it's just like CSI. This guy's pretty much a doctor. I suddenly regret this decision. They didn't cover this in inflation school.

I am a human balloon! I want to die! A few seconds later, the inflation police burst into the room. Yay! Oh, shit! Oh, shit! A few seconds later, the inflation police burst into the room. Yay! They live inside of my inflated head. I'm glad that they showed up. I was worried.

The thing is, it says the inflation police burst into the room, so they might have exploded too by entering the room. Surveying the room and finding only the doctor and the Burnett's remains. Son of a bitch! We're too late! Excuse me? Don't you see where you messed up? I thought my execution was flawless. It was. Almost. We can certainly appreciate a good use of the law of naval perm...

The law of naval permittivity when we see... Wait! Wait! It's your thing! Wait, you're not familiar with that? Jesus, man, didn't you go to school? You can put it out every Christmas, the permittivity system. How do they work?

However, there was one glaring flaw. He reaches down and grabs handfuls of the brunette's shredded debris. The laws of mutual feminine attraction! How could you forget the laws of mutual feminine attraction? How could you forget? What? What? What's he talking about here?

His voice cracking and he's noticeably upset. The most basic of all inflation arts. All you had to do was rub her big brown body. Maybe a gentle kiss, that's all. But no. You were colder to her neurotic state than something that is

really cold. And now she's gone. I see she's gone! I see he's continuing with his extensive attention to detail. This is backstabbing now. This is fleshing out the universe. Gee! I'm sorry, guys.

My first real day on the job. Well, just don't let it happen again. We busted our asses trying to get here in time to save this story. What? Fourth wall? Oh, fourth wall. Boom! That fourth wall

just got exploded by the exploding brunettes. That's my bad. She respects no boundaries. It won't happen again. Grabs another couple of hoses. However, are you familiar with the first law of mutual

masculine attraction? They exchange nervous looks with inflation policeman number one. Shit, she's good. Wah, wah, wah, wah. So I guess we have to turn into balloons and make out now. Sorry. Did it have guns or anything?

I guess Inflation Police has little balloon animal guns or something. That was the best movie Keanu Reeves has ever starred in. Wait, wait, wait. Even better than Chain Man. Oh, wait, never mind. There certainly was a point break there.

That was fucking fast. Jesus. Jesus. Yeah. You still got that magic touch, doesn't you? I do, really. Alright, I want to do this one here. This is sort of real inflation on a budget.

Inflation is bad for your budget. On a budget? That's stupid. Would you like to inflate more whores? Sure, we all will. Can anyone help me with making a homemade anal balloon setup? I have party balloons and a few hoses and a pump.

Help, please. That's all you need there, isn't it? No, it gets better. I? No, it gets better. I promise you it gets better. I really picture, like, on the infomercials, the black and white part. Isn't it so hard to have an anal balloon set up? Throw away all this stuff!

It too dangerous to make a homemade anal balloon? The balloon pops and can hurt you very badly or even kill you! What a killjoy. The danger is... Very serious about it. ...an anal balloons. Hello, I'm Foot Pump Girl.

Just buy an inflatable butt plug or dildo. Made from very strong rubber and very, very pleasurable. Well, until you pop, that is. XXXX won't age with inflation. More could a girl ask for.

I'm not a functioning brain. The next sentence I just want... Yeah. The next sentence is amazing. I wouldn't be asking about this if I didn't have experience with inflating balloons in my butt. Yay!

I mean, come on! I just don't know how to get them to inflate my rounders rather than long so that they can act more as a butt plug till I get enough money to buy a real one. I'm sorry. Why didn't you say so? Jesus.

I'm not an idiot. You just followed the turnip trick here, guys. Give me some credit here, guys. I am familiar with inflating balloons in my butt. I'm just saying it could be a problem. This ain't my first time to the butt inflation rodeo. I just don't want to see you get hurt.

Would you ever want this fetish to go mainstream? By Kayleanne. I think that part of fetishism is the forbidden secrets and the power they have. I don't know why I put a semicolon after forbidden, but let's go with it. Because it looks classy. Semicolons are classy.

You know what really helps your prose flow a hard stop right in the middle of a sentence? For no reason. Anyways. You know, I'm really displeased that she doesn't have way more ellipses. I mean, what the hell is she doing on the internet? She has a lot to learn.

Okay. With this in mind, I realize that although I adore inflation, I would never want it to become popular and mainstream as it would lose some of its potency. lose some of its potency. As access and exposure to previously obscure fetishes is getting easier, what does everyone else think? I liked sticking a tube down someone's throat and inflating them

until they explode back when it was underground. Now we've got Ryan Seacrest inflating on TV. He's not feeling it. He doesn't believe in it. He's just in it for the money. Now Fox has Inflation Idol going on.

Yeah, it's just like... And there's all this pop for pay, and it's just not the same. I would love for this fetish to go mainstream. L-O-V-E it. I have dreams about it sometimes. Think about it. Having inflation fetish dating sites,

inflation fetish clubs, like inflation fetish clubs, and then in brackets, like bondage clubs, except everybody's in an inflatable suit instead of ball gags. You couldn't get in. No, literally, you could not get in the door.

The door would not open. You know, caffeine must have... Oh, shit, semicolon. I've got to bring my A game. My A-punctuation game. Class, sit up. You've just got a semicolon. That's the second bracket.

And then has two semicolons in the same sentence. Bondage clubs accept everybody's in an inflatable suit instead of ball gags. Close bracket. Second semicolon. Finally getting good inflation jokes on TV shows.

What? I've been aching for some good inflation jokes. Welcome to Snakeo. You're popping. Oh, Jay. Bill Clinton likes no jobs. I bet he blew her up.

And most of all, the high-end, quality inflatable porn that would be made catering specifically to us. And then, if someone found out, it wouldn't be so obscure and freaky. And then, if someone found out, it wouldn't be so obscure and freaky. You'd have people that dabbled in it occasionally and kind of discuss it with friends. You'd find tire pumps in people's rooms the same way you occasionally find handcuffs. What? Yeah. you'd find tire pumps in people's rooms the same way you occasionally find handcuffs what? I am 100% on board with this fetish going mainstream

I meant that sarcastically you know what that post really needed? just like a just playing inspirational music also tire pumps in people's rooms like you can actually inflate people with tire pumps that's the disconnect here like, you can actually inflate people with

tire pumps. Yeah, that's the disconnect here, is they don't understand that this shit doesn't exist in real life. You really can handcuff people to things. Exactly. You can actually pump people up with hand pumps. Thank you. They're inflating balloons up their butts. Did you not understand the previous thread?

I just really want to point out, I like that Caffeine has this idea, like, a bondage club is just like a regular bar, except everybody has ball gags on. They're just walking around. It's hard to dweak! How do you drink?

I forgot, homo! He doesn't say they're wearing, he says they're in ball gags. He's also got this other idea. He's also got this weird idea that if it's suddenly mainstream, there'll be high-end quality porn. And I gotta tell you that there's porn for

everybody out there as long as there's enough of a market share. And none of it's high quality ever. Which ball gag should I wear to the club tonight? Which goes with my dress better? One that looks like a nine. In 31414.15,

Soapbubble. Add to the fan with this going mainstream, it could produce some new and interesting content slash scene in the mainstream for better or for worse, like the comic strip in attention, portrayal

and quality. It's pre-trail. Pre-trail. I'm going to betray you, just to let you know. You've been betrayed, girl! I gotta go to pre-trail.

I like the pre-betrayal one. That was classy. It may result in more trolls, but most should get over it. Hopefully after going mainstream, people won't be too freaked out inflation

content and having an inflation-esque fetish. Then again, it could all blow up and be a disaster. Oh! Who knows? then again it could all blow up and be a disaster who knows maybe we could bring back a large wikipedia page that doesn't get deleted but that's another thread

I'd strongly prefer this thing to stay indie forever death to false inflation give it time! Homosexuality used to be something you kept under wraps, and look at it now! Look at you, homosexuality, all grown up. Homosexuality is a fetish.

Seaboy is actually Rick Santorum. Lateralis 87. Just curious, why would you want it to stay like that? Just to clear up one point, I would never want Inflation Fetish to be some exclusive club, as sexual fetishes are for anyone and everyone of age. Oh, thank you. In fact, they seem to be ingrained to the point where your kinks are just a part of you. I'm unsure about this one still. Inflation being more accessible in fetish clubs sounds good to me, but I wouldn't want it to be everywhere.

Maybe I'm selfish and old-fashioned, but I prefer things not to get demystified because then they can become mundane. Look at vampires. Because then they can become mundane. Look at vampires. Once a mysterious and awesome legend, now a glittery chap with a big forehead. Smiley face. Okay, so I'm being silly. But I hope you see my point.

I don't. I agree that things creep in over time. BDSM and Sex and the City is a good example. Yeah, that's a perfect parallel. Creep being the operative word here. I'm an inflation vampire. I'm going to blow you up. Bleh, bleh.

So, anyways, Little Pumpkin, I am a beach ball, by the way. Although I do want to see more inflation stuff. No thanks. I'm glad normal things don't turn me on so I don't have to feel uncomfortable all the time. I want to keep it that way. And I want to keep it for myself. Hey, you're not allowed to talk during Holy Bomb. The fact that he's implying that normal shit,

everybody's walking around with an erection just from getting on the subway or something. Oh, damn this shirt fetish of mine. Yeah, I know I was. Damn this wearing clothes. I like women and there were women on the bus today. Oh, man, that fucking... Holy shit.

Inflation hipsters are my favorite subculture of the so-called. All right, I'm going to skip down all the way to Inflate123, because he's another inflation. Guys, did you see the Death by Blueberry show? I don't care about mainstream acceptance anymore. If it happens, great. If it doesn't, great. The media has come sniffing

around and interviewed some of us, semicolon. Sometimes they don't bother to do that and comment anyway. I think it's so implausible and is in many minds the same as weight gain because of the body shapes and as we know, society

says fat is bad. Run on sentence that it will likely never break into the mainstream but if it does, it will be through a joke, a funny scene in a movie, the awkward loser with the inflation fetish who gets the laughs and then people will go online and find out it's real,

or worse, some crazy people who saw that hit movie have built a community around that scene. So, you know, what do we get out of that? Eddie Deason. Two. I know I've told this story before, but when The Daily Show, Killborn Era came knocking, yes, I'm sorry, I'm told this story before, but when The Daily Show, Kilborn era, came knocking, yes, I'm sorry, I'm name-dropping,

I said I would be happy to talk to them and was a big fan of the show. That made them lose interest immediately. We were aware of who they were and therefore no longer exploitable. There's mainstream for you. So whatever happens happens. If by some miracle that mass media flashpoint moment leads to the new

artists, stories, and products being made available, I really like that potential upside. I still like it when legit outlets like Catherine Gates come asking about us because that's more likely to be a respectful inquiry into the culture and what makes us

tick. But more, oh, look at the weirdo stuff, like G4? I don't really need that. And I'll keep on doing myself either way. I've got this podcast I want you to listen to and play. Yeah! Yeah! and there we go that is our podcast on inflation fetishists john what do you think you learned this

week well i learned what i theorized at one point, and I think it's that some people have really bad luck on when their sexuality turned on, when puberty just switched on for them. Because what I'm pretty sure had happened is that a lot of these people were near pubescent age, and then the moment they saw the Violet Beauregard scene in Willy Wonka, or they saw in a cartoon somebody sticking a hose in the cartoon dog's mouth and blowing him up to look like a balloon, that's the exact moment their body decided, okay, we're going to hit puberty now. And suddenly they're like, wait, this is what turns me on?

Crap. It was just that instant, you know, the law of averages. There were so many people with that bad coincidence that suddenly you got a whole community of people being like, I like seeing people inflate. That's a really good theory. That's a really good theory. But why would it be the

Viral Power Guard blueberry scene instead of Baruch Assault getting shoved down the tube? That's my finish. Well, let's see. The website is always thefpl.us Now up and running. Now up and running and looking very good.

Yeah. I can say so myself. It was quite nice. Our big thanks to Mr. Jimmy Franks for being our stand-in sound engineer while Boots Ranger pretends to be an American for a couple weeks. When he came by, he was just looking at a hamburger going like, what is this? Well, as always, thanks for listening.

And, you know, thanks for paying attention to us while we talk about people who like to get turned on by impossible things. We'll see you next week. Like us on Facebook. Yes. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. When I was finding this, there was a segment on, like, Attack of the Show where, like, they talked about the site, and they were like, Yeah, these guys are freaks! Yeah, yeah, yeah, Halo!

And, um... I refuse to believe that they would use a script for every show, isn't it? Yeah, yeah, Halo. So they actually, they linked to, like, a video of this, and they were all really happy that Attack of the Show was making fun of them. There's no such thing as bad publicity. Alright then. To be fair,

I'd kind of be excited if Attack of the Show was making fun of us because that would mean that we were credible. Have you heard of these F-plus guys think they're so funny? In the case of these inflation guys, it's not like they could be more humiliated. Yeah, that's true. Next up on Attack of the Show,

a podcast where they read shit on the internet! They're a bunch of assholes. I'm sorry, I didn't blame you. I'm a pair of tits. Meh.