The F Plus - 38: Let Your Subconscious Be Your Guide

Episode Date: March 1, 2011

People say that most human beings only use ten percent of their brains. The thing is, people who say that are lying to you. I mean, we have MRIs. All that glowing red stuff? That's the brain working. It's reminding you to breathe, remembering song lyrics, or in the cases of these subjects - making up a bunch of new age hippie nonsense. This week, it's psychic energy and hypnotism, and everything about it is as silly as you'd expect.

Hello, and welcome to the F+. Terrible things, read with enthusiasm. My name's Lemon. And I'm John. To the F+, terrible things read with enthusiasm. My name's Lemon. And I'm John. And thanks to the internet, we are about to take a trip into your very mind. To the core of your being, to the very center of your brain. John, what do you think we know about the human mind?

We know little except the parts that we fear. We know that the human mind makes you write terrible fan fiction. We know that the human mind can lead you to believe you are a dragon in another world. We know that the human mind makes you think that those pictures of

you showing off your abs is totally going to get you laid on OkCupid. We know that the human mind can make you think wearing face paint and being 500 pounds is a fashion statement. This week on F+, we control the horizontal. We control the vertical. And I guess you just sit there and listen to it. Sure, please listen.

It'll be good. There's hypnotism and psychics, I think. Enjoy! Alright, Torgo, let's get to the readers. In the room tonight, we have Boots Reingear. I wash my aura with dirt. Bunny bread? Is your house hunted? In the room tonight, we have Boots Reingear. I wash my aura with dirt. Bunny Bread. Is your house haunted? Could you be suffering from deep deprivation?

John. I had a time hypnotized by a girl. Check, check. Your semen comes funk, jizz, baby batter. Come quads up. All of my dreams are about Odo tickling me. My crystals like to listen to this podcast as part of their cleansing. Is my house hunted?

There's a, I think something is going on. And lemon. Sleep! Clearing a crystal that's been negatively used. I'm Zippy. I'm Zippy. Hi, Zippy. Hello. I'm new to the site and forum.

I reside in Vancouver, BC area. I'm an energy healer and touch therapist. I've been studying for about 15 years, practicing professionally part-time for the past six. I told the judge I'm a touch therapist! I needed to heal her energy, and all her energy was in her genitals. That's all I'm saying about that. Touch therapist is my favorite Wii game, I think. I recently came into possession of a beautiful crystal, green and purple fluorite,

the size of a small fist that had been used in early very dark rituals the present owner came into it incidentally and was largely ignorant of the ramifications of having it in her home though she realized her cat wouldn't come near it the energy was truly

discordant dark and hateful I wouldn't touch it instead got it into a plastic bag carried outside. This is full of This is full of evil, dark energy. I can't even touch it.

You know what will block it? A plastic bag. A fucking ziplock will contain it. If Cthulhu comes back, all we need is a lot of saran wrap and we'll be set. Keeps freshness in, doesn't let demons out. Yeah, that blue plus yellow equals green and it means you're safe. I got into a plastic bag to carry

it outside, comma, ampersand, did two clearings on it. Reiki and physical rolling it in wet dirt and dead leaves. So if a plastic bag alone won't keep all the evil in. I thought of something funny while I said that.

I am death and destruction. Oh, God, is that a leaf? Oh, God. I just love the imagery of driving by and seeing, like, hippie Katamari going on in the street. So I did all that before I even felt safe putting it back in my car. What really surprised me is that after the first two cleanses, the Reiki ended up rolling it in dirt.

Clean dirt. Yeah. I clean up dirt. Much of the darkest energy it left and what became palpable underneath was incredible loneliness and despair of the previous owner, who I guess from the energy to be a man in his early 30s. He's coming from a man

in his early 30s. I'm a man in my late 30s, asshole. Let us not quantify what energy is or how you could tell what energy comes from what person. Just know. It seems to me to be the energy of a man who's in his 30s who nobody loved and who was

friends with rocks. Sorry. It was a bit of a wake-up call, reminder of what the impetus for some behavior is, ampersand, that it may not be driven initially from hate, but from emotional desperation. Clearly no protection here.

I've been nursing the crystal back slowly. More energy. More energy clearings. More water. I'm bringing it indoors. I'm playing guitar for it. I bought diapers from my little crystal I was thinking maybe it was one of those dancing flower pots you used to get at the mall

I know what it'll fix demonic chia vent alright little crystal here's your favorite song gotta have faith faith faith, faith. If anyone has any further tips, please feel free to pass them on. Best wishes, Z. No, we don't have any further tips.

You got it all, man. Look, you ran water, dirt, guitar. That's it. Well, the thing is, Crystal Tarot has some more, has further advice. What could possibly follow? I'm Crystal Tarot, and I'm down to Earth. Hi and welcome,

smiley face, sniggering at Crystal Guru lol. Ah well, I do have many, I suppose. Forgive me if you know all this, but disregard those bits, smiley face. Fluorite is a natural energy receiver. It soaks up

energy, but more specifically negative energy. Not specifically. Specifically. I'm sorry. Specifically negative energy. I don't want to sound uneducated here. Brilliant for TV and electromagnetic energy, mobile phones or high voltage electricity

pylons, etc. So it can take an awful lot of negative energy and hold it inside. Science! No, mobile phones are negative energy, of course. They're negative of society. I've been playing the guitar for my mobile phone recently. I think some things have improved.

My coverage has really gone up. It's spectacular. No, don't play the guitar. I will send you so many fees. I found a nap for my guitar. Thanks, dog. Okay. It doesn't really transmute it into good, though, like some crystals can. It is more of a receiver and then a repository, as you are rightly finding out. You are cleansing it in levels, going through the

harmonics of the crystal. The outer layers are the newest and will have been removed now by your attempts at cleansing. Now you are getting to the emotional layers, and they will need different handling. Reiki is good, and it will be beneficial

throughout the process, which may actually take years. Yes, you'll have to spend years playing guitar for your fucking rock. For your fucking rock. You don't have to. It's a privilege. This is giving me horrible fucking memories of my last girlfriend.

Is it Crystal Tarot? Yeah, basically Well, if your last girlfriend looked like me then that would be understandable Is it an actual crystal or is it someone named Crystal? It's someone named Crystal Did you roll your girlfriend in dirt and wet leaves?

I don't like it when you do this Shut up, quit holding all the negativity I have two pieces that are in their sixth year of cleansing when you do this. Shut up. Quit holding in all the negativity. I have two pieces that are in their sixth year of cleansing. Every day they get a little bit brighter and lighter and happier. And considering how long it took to form the crystal,

six years seems nothing. Why, question mark? Fuck you. Now you say that, but it sounds like you have the knowledge and senses to feel what is needed for the next layer. It might be fresh, cold running water of a stream or the ocean, or it may be wrapping the crystal in black. Smudging is another good cleansing process as the energy is floated away on the smoke.

Hey, you know what? You know what you should do? You should combine the crystal with all the items in your inventory. See, I don't want to get out of my room. Please do avoid salt. That will only cause more damage and harm. What, are you a doctor now?

You may feel that burying the crystal for time might help, if so, do this in a buried box or flower pot or you may go back burying the crystal for time might help, if so, do this in a buried box or flower pot, or you may go back and find the crystal has vanished to the depths of the earth. You might. Oh my god. I buried a crystal

and forgot where I buried it. It disappeared. Oh, you didn't forget it vanished to the depths of the earth. Mother recycled it, asshole. I took some of my stones to the alpine snow of Switzerland, and that worked a treat for some. Others wanted a short dip in a thermal hot spring.

I can't imagine these rocks on the way to Switzerland. Are we there yet? Jack, how did you put up with this fucking girlfriend? What a slut. There was a lot of sex. A lot of crystal magic sex. All right, Jack. I know what you have to do.

Jack, I know what you have to do. You have to go over to her house right now and just salt all her rocks. No! They were so close. You have to go over to her house right now and just salt all her rocks. No! No! They were so close. Fluorite is pretty tough, but always dry well and of, so moon

and sunlight will fade it. Oh, UV. No, that says of. I didn't expect an actual scientific term. I was thrown. Energy! of. I forgot. I didn't expect an actual scientific term. Energy. Ultraviolet. I haven't seen anything that wasn't actually scientific.

It's true. You may find that more memories rise from this piece so little and often and only when you are feeling strong and fit. If you have any rose quartz healers or golden calcite healers, then you may want to try

with one of these in your hand to the fluorite. Slow is the best way forward with this piece. Do you have a pick by any chance? Show me your rocks, buddy. Oh, I did post a pick. That's great. Yeah.

Is my house hunted? I think something is going on. Somebody's been chasing my house hunted? I think something is going on. Somebody's been chasing my house around in the backwoods, blowing a French horn. Ravenous real estate agents lurking in the dark. I'm spirit and soul. I'm rather curious about things. You know, some might say I'm even curiouser than the average bear. Let's see here.

Do you have any interests? No, not really. Oh, wait. You know what? Now say I'm even curiouser than the average bear. Let's see here. Do you have any interests? No, not really. Oh, wait. You know what? Now that I think about it, I have my own baking biz. I love it. I give free readings as a psychic and was born with this gift. Okay.

So I'm happy you asked. By the way, I'm also hanging out in Cooper Fife. I love Cooper Fife. Yep, who doesn't? That's why I'm here. Hi all, it's been a few months since I was last on here. If someone can help, I would be grateful. You both be grateful.

We'll be grateful. I be live. This is something in my house. Psychic. And was born with this gift and do use it to help people. I feel something is here since I moved here six slash seven years ago.

I knew there was something. I could feel it. There has been a food accident with my two youngest kids that I really should have been badly hurt, but thy have both walked away unhurt, which W-R-T-C-H is great.

Witches are great. Witches are great. My son at nine months went flying down the stairs in his walkin' and was unhurt. My daughter, when she was 17 months, feel down. Then with a fork in her hand

and even cry. There are 15 stairs which W.I.T.C.H. are conseret. I was so glad that I were both okay. But keep it together.

But since we moved in, it's my hobby. He had felt drained and has suffered from really bad depression, which is... Wow, I wonder what presence in his life every day could be making him depressed. No, he's just depressed. Yeah, that's true. He's depressed. No, he's just depressed. That's true. Which is something that he never had in his life. I myself at times have felt the same, but I feel bound

to this house. Like something is keeping me here, I love my house. I have put a lot of time and money into it. If this makes science... No, it makes a lot of science. If it does... If this makes seance, to anyone,

can you please help? I'm going to post a few photos today. If you can help, please feel free to thank you. Feel free to thank you. Oh, yeah. I'm Black Raven. I'm inspired. I'm Black Raven. I'm inspired.

I'm a female. Where do you like to hang out, baby? I can tell. So, Black Raven, you come to this country often? If by this country you mean USA, my interests

are clairvoyance, tarot, graphology, and Yeah? That can't be everything, can it? Don't get frapped. You seem pretty one-dimensional so far. X plus Y equals vampires.

He just operates on two axes on a 2D plane. Paranormal? I'm very interested in paranormal Dreams Painting And piano Black Raven I forgot what was your gender again

I am a female I think you had something to say Spirit Embers and Soul I feel like you were describing my old house. But in reading your post, there are some significant factors that seem to stand out.

Oh, really? For one, you are psychic yourself. So, what kind of feeling is the house giving you? Negative or positive? It's not haunted with candy. Those are the only two feelings.

It's flinging my kids down the stairs, but it feels pretty positive otherwise. Oh, I'm the candy cane ghost. Oh, I come once a year. That's the sound that candy canes make in the wild. Stog is a nature

documentarian. Thanks, Stog. After all, the children both had mishaps and were spared injury even though you would have thought they would have gotten hurt under normal circumstances.

Is that negative? Yeah, sure. you would have thought they would have gotten hurt under normal circumstances. Oh. Is that negative? Yeah, sure. Maybe the ghost is just flinging the children down for fun. Whee! No, but they saved them is the point. Something could be protecting the children is my point. See?

Female agrees with me. As for your husband's depression, I don't want to make light of it, but it may be... You're depressed! Begging! I know you're crying and shit. But it may be purely coincidental that depression hit him while living in that particular

house. There are any dark entities lurking about that would push them out of your home. It doesn't sound like you want to leave what you've made into more than just a house.

Hang on, hang on, hang on. Wasn't smudging smoking? Yeah. Does anyone build a bonfire in a fucking basement and have everything turn black? Yeah, there's something. Yeah, there's some sort of thing. Smoke all over your house.

And yeah, evil energy floats away on smoke because crystals energy. Because bongs are involved. Let's cut to the chase. Have you tried getting fucking high? You did say you loved your house. That's a strong comment. I lived in my previous home for 16

years and absolutely loved it and was soulfully attached to it. Soulfully attached to it? When I left, I couldn't say goodbye to it. It was too painful, so I just

pulled out of the driveway and didn't even look back. I know how committed you feel about your home. If you want to live there, then smudge, and if your husband is depressed, then get him the help he needs. Good luck

to you, spirit. Ampersand soul. Okay. This is the modern world. This is the modern world. What kind of fool do you think I am? Hi, I'm Lance.

I'm a light. Hi, I'm Lance. I'm a light... Butthead. Yes, read on, Butthead. I had a discussion with a medium friend of mine about why we have things in the world like cancer and other diseases, and she made a point about

we are keeping ourselves alive longer this way. And perhaps these sort of things are nature's way of keeping the population under control. Don't get me wrong. I am not saying that cancer is there as a population

control, but though history, there are times when things like the plague wipe out millions of people. Why do you think that is? It always turned out well. So, wait, the growth has been unparalleled. Oh, fuck it. Why would I argue?

Portek, take the next one. Alright, I am Zoruglu. Hey, do you have any interests? Yeah. First of all, my location is the source. Oh, do you have any interests? Yeah. First of all, my location is the source. Oh, okay. I know a guy from there. My interests are anything interesting.

Oh. So you're... Okay, and I would like to tell you that negative energy brings death-ases. Positive energy brings health. That's all there is to it, really.

This came from my Taoistic teacher guide. Happy face! Wait, so that's a teacher guide? So if I pay like $100 for a class? I'm pretty sure a guide, when they spell it like that, is like a spirit. Oh, okay.

It's the Taoist way of pissing in the snow. Kumquat? Does anyone have good Dutch? Well, who doesn't? Okay, let's do this. Hello, I'm Adanora D. Nany. I'm male, unlike

what I'm suggesting right now. I like to hang out in the eye of the storm. My interests are music, art, and living life to the fullest possible, lol. The fullest possible, lol.

There says in the line, without otherwise, the kind of get squished into the length of bio-lol. Lol. So, different class. I wouldn't say this is Dutch. into the length of my own. Oh. I wouldn't say this is Dutch anymore. What do you have to say? This is all that happens when we're losing our balance.

Whoa. We all understand that, first of all. I slipped on a banana peel and then I had cancer. Oh, yes. We have evidence right there. Here in Dutch, we got an expression of someone who is speaking...

Why did you turn Italian? Don't worry, we're going to switch accents about three more times. Now. We're going to end up... Accent sampler. Dutch, we got an expression on someone who is thinking

about everything going on and looking everything from a bad way. Right? But no smiley face. Literal translation. He is cancering about. What the fuck does that mean? You don't know what I just said.

He's getting his cancer on. So Kankorin stands for having lots of not so positive thoughts. I'm a doctor and a linguist. What the fuck does any of this have to do with... I'm getting to it. I'm getting to it. Okay. Okay.

So that's the point. We tend to think much about what may happen and therefore forget what is actually happening now. You see? That makes sense. Good. John, I think Wind Dance is you. Wind Dance is fucking awful or awesome. I don't know.

Awesome. Alright. My name is Wind Dance. I'm enlightened. I am in Florida. My interests are Windance. I'm enlightened. I am in Florida. My interests are life, love, and people. I'm a minister, counselor, Reiki master, reflexologist, hymnal therapist. I also channel. I am in a path of psyche abilities.

Also, I am licensed in cosmetology. I love photography, black and white. I love to hand color photos, gardening, walking through the woods with camera and editing, meditating on the beach. And I would like to add, we are so bombarded with chemicals, poisons in the food we eat, the medicine we take, the water we drink, the air we drink,

the products we use for hygiene, washing laundry, and hygiene. I'm sorry, hygiene. Not to mention chemtrails. No chemtrails. No chemtrails. No chemtrails, Faith. You have a camera while I'm reading.

I'm reading this too well. These things throw our balance off. Our body chemistry can only take so much. If we had an all-natural enviorment, you would be absolutely right. And thinking positive will always be a plus for good health. Happy face!

Yay! I like the combination of crystal therapy and also there's chemtrails, I guess. Oh, chemtrails. Yeah, chemtrails. This chemical is bad. Send it to jail. Oh, I want to do Lance again.

Alright, go ahead. I'm Lance again. I agree with the positive outlook, but where I have a problem is where I believe that when your number is up, your number is up, no matter how positive you are.

What I meant more is, are we interfering with nature too much? The right size and color tomatoes? Carrots act free of chemicals. And now there is talk of cloning act. No, not more ads. Our own worst enemy. Our own worst enemy?

Yes, Thomas. We are a long way from the Garden of Edan. Thanks to man-messing. Man used to live for hundreds of years. Disease-free. Really? Due to the natural balance of body and earth. Wink!

Wink! That's bullshit! Oh, but there's more. It, it, not a virus or bacteria. It was caused by man manipulating our environment. Such as autoimmune disease, cancer, diabetes, etc.

Diabetes. Apple brown diabetes. Apple brown diabetes. Bam, bam. Fucking diabetes fucking up our enviornment. They say, if man-made don't use it or eat it,

lol, where does that leave us? Help! Scotty, beam me up! Rolling eyes. I don't know what that means. This planet is in such poor shape due to manipulating nature. And man having no compassion for man, rolling eyes. Sucks, Docente-ti-it. Aww.

Scared. And then your last one. Yes, we are our own worst enemy. But unfortunately, it's the big guy and his love for money for us. It's unfortunate to say the least. What can we do? Any suggestions? There's one more in here that's important

to do, is that for some reason Godwin shows up. Why wouldn't he? Boots, if you want to take Zoruglu? Zoruglu. Yeah. Hi, I'm Zoruglu. I'm Zoroglu

I sound different from the last time I was talking I do Was I Zoroglu last time? Yeah I've grown since then To make these things stop is simple Grow your own vegetables and become independent If nobody XXX's Manipulated veggies Those products Would die vegetables and become independent. If nobody XXX's manipulated veggies,

those products would die. Stop fucking veggies. Stop making vegetable porn. Stop putting poison in your veggies. It's not poison, it's my seed. Moonshine. But everybody here is in the social and economical

system. Everybody works, so nobody has the time to grow veggies. So everybody has to go to the shop and XXX the manipulated crap with money. What is that? They censored by. I figured it out. They censored by on their forums. I don't know why.

Oh, that's terrific. Yeah. Love that. That's great. Okay, okay. Okay. So you have to work, and so this vicious circle of modern slavery is created. We have been reduced to merely batteries to make this economical structure self-sustaining.

The people are not part of the economic system or better, who are the foundation in terms of providing resources die from starvation. Yeah. How can such a foundation of our civilized world be healthy to begin with? Never forget we all make choices and that we, Al, are responsible for them. Al,

fix it. It's like with Hitler. You're fucking responsible. Like with Hitler. It's like with Hitler. You're fucking responsible. Like with Hitler. It's like with Hitler. He's such a bad man, isn't he? Because of him, Europe and other parts of the world have suffered. Well, wrong!

It are people listening to him that are the ones who gave it the power he had. Power in quotation marks. As if he was the dictator of a country or anything. I really think that that's not at all a reductionist

frame of reference in regards to the Second World War or anything like that. I agree. It's not reductionist. No, it's not. I mean, he really has all sides of the entire discussion. Well, he was a bad man, was he not? Okay. If people would not have listened to him and let him ramble on, he really has all sides of the entire discussion. Well, he was a bad man, was he not? Okay. There.

If people would not have listened to him and let him ramble on, he would have ended up with a job in a supermarket or paper charlal. Paper char. Well, here, I'm about to make the point. The point I want to make here is that we all take part of this and that simply being aware isn't enough. The question here is, what are you willing to do about it?

It's all very nice to go into spiritual phylocyfical Okay, so Ruggler, spell that out for us. F-Y-L-O-S-I-F-I-C-A-L phylocyfical Spell that out for us. F-Y-L-O-S-I-F-I-C-A-L. Philocyphical.

Philocyphical. Philocyphical. Philocyphical. That's one of the preservatives in Pepsi, isn't it? It's very nice to go into spiritual philosophical discussions and share channeled texts about the expansion of consciousness, etc. But what is talking about all that change when nothing is done? What are you prepared to carifice? Nothing.

Oh, man. Carifice bears were my favorite. Carifice, shit. Isn't the carifice, isn't that what a turtle has on its back? Yes. Yeah. Producing the computer that you use, the car that you drive,

is all part of the pollution of our mother. Are you prepared to give up all that to help bring back her health? No, fucker! No, it's not posted on this forum. Obviously, a global yearly prayer or lighting a candle once in a while for her healing isn't sufficient, is it?

What? And don't forget that when a disease is showing its symptoms, this is because the cure has already been engaged and the balance is being installed again. What? No. Sometimes by the time you get symptoms, that means you're doomed. If we're going to do one last reply to it, then it has to be Adriana, because Adriana has fucking amazing response. Well, you take it. Vortex, do it. I'll take it.

Well, my feelings are this. Disease is a product, in most cases, of thought. Dis- ease. Oh, shit. Oh, shit. Proven. We are a planet of Oh, shit. Oh, shit. Oh, shit. Yeah. Uh-huh.

Proven. You stole my mind. We are a planet of negatively charged people. Yeah. As we learn on an individual basis to change the way we look at things, then the health of our world will also change. Oh, okay. But this now will happen one person at a time, and we can only be responsible for this one person ourselves.

Illness serves a purpose at times, at least to our egocentric minds. Perhaps we desire more compassion, or we can no longer handle the stress that we created in our lives, and we want out of this mess we created. So if you get sick, it's because you want attention,

or because you want to shirk your responsibilities. It's basically what you're trying to say here. What's that? Munchausen syndrome. Okay. Yeah. How many people do you know that are just negative in their opinions? And aren't they some of the sickest people

you know? Now, I am not saying this is true of everyone, but there is a correlation. You know, I gotta say, Noam Chomsky's writing has suffered lately. He's back on the sauce, isn't he? Exactly. I get the feeling that maybe Adriana works

for an insurance company or something. Well, you got sick, but you were thinking negatively, obviously. Pre-existing condition. Existing condition. How many people... In the movie, what the bleep do we know anyway?

Yeah. They showed how our negative thoughts create branches of neurons that can then create more negative thoughts and these negative thoughts contribute then to the illness within the body. Huh. Yep.

I stopped thinking right there. I saw this other movie where the swords are made of light, and they hit each other with them, so that's probably true too. As we learn to refocus our thoughts, turn them into the positive, and then counter the neurons, and then fire positive,

and thus create more branches of positive options. Is this Gradius now? Fire the proton beams at the starboard side. I'm firing the positive bullets at your face. The branches of positive options, therefore healthier bodies.

There are, however, some people who may not fit into this scenario. And in some cases, it may just be an issue in this life that they need to experience. What? Oh, okay, but this is rarely the case.

In some cases, shit doesn't make any sense. Only rarely, though. We may not be able to change the world. We already know that activism and demonstrations, war, have all been futile in the past. War has never accomplished anything. Neither has activism of any kind. But we can change ourselves. We can monitor our thoughts, refocus them to the positive, thusly improving our own health.

And eventiali, one person at a time, our world will begin to change. It's already beginning. And the power is within each one of us. Well, that's why those parents... and the power and the power is within each one of us. Well, that's why those parents That's why those parents who pray for their children to get over illnesses never have their children die. To be fair, the kids were doing it just to stop

cleaning the room, so, you know. I just go down to St. Jude's and was just like, fucking stop playing Nintendo! I know you just want to get out of homework, you little bastards. Also, grow of homework, you little bastards. Also, grow some hair, you little sickly shit. Just do the first post on this one.

Holy wee. This is the Hypnosis Forum and the thread title is Gay Urge. I'm Holy Wings and I got the gay urge. I had a time hypnotized my girl and later I find that I more and more attract a man.

Is that possible to make a person attract a man with hypnosis even before i was totally resist on the idea that could it be something she had done to me how could i fix it somebody help me I thought hypnosis cannot make people do anything I just got a feeling she did this to me can it be cured now I'm really somehow involved

with some man she introduced to me and happily but so I just enjoy the moment and after that I feel weird somehow. We are very heterosexual. Okay, so following that are a ton of posts from people saying yeah, it wasn't the hypnosis that made you gay.

And then the fourth post from the bottom is his response. Okay, yeah. Fourth post from the bottom. Oh response. Okay, yeah. Fourth post from the bottom. Oh, so I have to read again. Yeah, just read again. Okay, okay. Thanks, you guys, for all your help.

I cannot believe how much people who cares. Now I think I am going to find a hypnotherapy for the answer. Thanks a lot, you guys. There's like two people that said, yeah, maybe it might cure you. But the vast majority were just like, no. The sign of hypnosis is a weird thing.

Dude, you're gay. Well, I have to send a happy ending. Here's something really glorious. Glorious. Hi, I'm Frank Freeman. Hi, Frank. Hi, Frank. Hi, Frank. Hi, Frank. I want to talk about mass covert hypnosis.

We all do, Frank. Hello. Up until recently, my only experience of hypnotism was what I saw on TV. However, since October slash November time, this has changed. I believe I am being covertly hypnotized by almost everyone I know. I believe I am being covertly hypnotized by almost everyone I know. The only logical, rational, and sane conclusion I can come to is that all the people I think are manipulating me know one common person or know each other extensively and are using each other slash the common denominator as a learning tool. That's the most sane conclusion he can come to.

It's the only logical thing. That is Occam's razor in action right there. I'll tell you about the beginning. It all began with me getting high. High from what? Let me rejoice that, I think. Okay, so we got the logical, rational part now. Good.

It all became with you getting high? Yeah, from weed. No! With a few nobodies. That's my thought. I can't really remember the first instance it happened, but one night I noticed that they, at least three people anyway, were staring at me intently.

I now think that this was a hypnotic gaze. I felt strange. Let's look at this fucking weird-looking stoner. I felt strange, introvert, different. This feeling has become familiar to me now, and I'm sure it is what hypnotists call a trance. No, call trance the genre of music. That's right.

It's what hypnotists call trance. This is what we call Paul Oakenfold. So it's called schizochore. Whenever I stopped focusing on what they were doing, I'm sure I saw them freaking out in the side of my eye, shaking their heads back and forth and so on. But whenever I looked up, they stopped. I have not been able to discover the name of this hypnotic mechanism. I would appreciate if someone told me the hypnotists do any number of random movements when you're not focusing on them.

Maybe something to confuse my critical factor? What? They possibly confused this guy. I mean, shit. They were doing all sorts of crazy motions when I wasn't looking at them, so technically I didn't witness it, but I did it. Anyway, after these

things happened on more than one occasion, I began to distance myself from these people, fearing what they were doing to my unconscious mind. Soon after this, people I have known for a long time, I mean years, began to use language tricks to confuse my critical factor as well as a hypnotic gaze. For instance, they would use double or even triple negatives as well as the same word in different contexts. That ain't a fucking joke. Yeah. even triple negatives, as well as the same word, but in different contexts. Then as I would... That ain't a fucking joke. Yeah. Then as I would begin

to zone back into the conversation, I would notice him staring through me. Hypnotic gaze, me thinks. Use the same word, but in different contexts. I mean, that is trippy. Holy shit. Use there to mean a location somewhere else. use the same word but in a different context I mean that is tricky holy shit he was there to me in a location somewhere else these guys are like word ninjas and shit

well this guy speaks perfect English so you know yeah he's got it down this took me off guard I started to believe I was going insane I mean how would this be possible? Why would people I have known for years all of a sudden switch on the hypnotism? Well, it gets worse.

I know what you're thinking. This sounds crazy. It's going to get crazier. I am currently studying A-levels. At around the same time, I began to be hypnotized by the nobodies who I thought were harmless stoners. I began to notice that I was also be hypnotized by the nobodies, who I thought were harmless stoners. I began to notice that I was also being hypnotized at schools. Not only by my fellow pupils, but also by the teachers. I'm

100% sure of this. And even worse, I believe their motive is to make me fail my A-level exams. This is the plot of so many Disney live-action movies. I think Kumquat Zop is right, though. He said that this was hypnotizing gang stalkers, I think.

Yeah, yeah, no, it is. I know this sounds far-fetched and absolutely ridiculous, but I wouldn't be writing it if I didn't believe it. I will now list some of my proof. All right, thank you, guys. We've been making fun of him, but here's some hard evidence. I definitely witnessed hypnotic gaze

from the stoners. He definitely spelled wrong every time. I definitely heard language tricks from the stoners. No, no, he denitedly. Yeah, that was denitedly. Right. I denitily heard language tricks from the stoners.

I definitely experienced trance around my t-shirts. And glow sticks. I mysteriously find myself with glow sticks. I have definitely

witnessed en masse confusion of my critical factor from both stoners and students slash teachers. What they will do is have many different conversations at once, using many different hand movements. Can anyone out there possibly confirm that this is a hypnotic trick? Many different conversations at once, I guess we're

in this as well. This is apparently a new point in this. It is proof. I have heard one of the stoners say once, you can tell I'm different when I'm angry. One of them said this when I told him I knew they were hypnotizing me and I wanted them to stop. I told them this often and they never would stop.

Another stoner replied to this with, I never act different when I'm angry, to which the previous stoner replied, someone is trying to get hired. What does this mean? This guy would be such a bummer to get high with. I can't believe these people are letting him hang out with them.

Oh, someone is trying to get hired. Okay. Once when I went to the toilet during one of my double lessons at school, I returned to the classroom to find my pen missing. Oh, no. Well, I was already kind of doing a Bruce McCullough voice. My pen.

The guy next to me had taken it and when I asked for it back, he used language tricks to confuse me and tried to say one of his pens was in fact mine. I disagreed and he reluctantly gave me the pen back. Or maybe I took it. I can't really remember. After this happened,

the guy on the other side of my started to speak. One said, oh, we better tell him about this. And the other just said, hmm, what does this mean? Tell who? What was the importance of me realizing someone had taken my pen? Oh, wow. Jesus Christ.

Now, on to evidence that supports my claim that my fellow students slash teachers are trying to make me fail. Often, I have heard them say things like, sometimes it's just so hard to remember. Sorry. Sometimes it's just so hard to remeber. Or the information just want code itself in your brain, or whatever

at the end of the sentences. I have also heard some of the people shout things like, you're mad as in the mad you possess. Oh man, my mad, sorry. Or make strange noises when I'm not

concentrating. Okay, that actually makes me sound mad, but I'm really not. Otherwise, this would be happening when I'm alone. What? That's proof positive. Anyway, I guess my questions are as follows. Is there any way I can stop

myself from being hypnotized by at least 15 to 20 people working together at one time? No. You're not going to like our answer. Just 20 people following him from behind with watches. Turns around and they all scatter. Is there any way I misinterpreted the hypnotic suggestions?

Of course not. There was a part of me that thinks it would be more logical for them to try to make me pass my exams rather than fail them. What? We're ruining your life by giving you an A on your tests. Is there any way of finding out my triggers or cues?

And the question I have been asking from the very beginning, is there any way I could find out who put my age-old friends, my fellow students, my teachers, and even my dealer-slash-donor friends up to this. A wizard! I was going to say the devil, but yeah. Any thanks for reading.

Oh, you're welcome. We did read. We didn't comprehend. Okay, I've got one for Jack. Alright. You're mind-blinking. Forging an identity after a breakup. I've hinted in other posts that I had a girl problem that could not be solved short of ending the relationship, rather provoking her to dumping me.

However, the end of this relationship coincides with the end, or rather the start, of a new life. I didn't welcome this new beginning at the time I was afraid of loosing her. Now that I have, I am not so worried about the future, but I'd also like to steer it in a certain direction, especially when it comes to initiating a relationship. I've learned a lot from the failure of this relationship, and I think I might have conquered, or

at least survived, my greatest fears. I don't want to squander it. I'm heading back to school. Before I plunge into the unknown, I want to think about reinventing my persona like Bruce Wayne did in Batman Begins. We've all been there. Go on.

Or the guy in The Last Samurai or Duncan MacLeod from The Highlander. I basically need to tap into some of my strengths. So it might not necessarily be romantic, sexy, er erotic hypnosis script that I need what I've learned most guys are encouraging to go for nice girls but my relationship to this type have usually ended in disasters I can't seem to read their signals properly

because they can't accept money for sex even that intuition I've gained from the remote seduction CD is overpowered by wishful thinking or misinterpretation of their signals. Jesus. I want to know how to avoid them entirely. Ironically, I'm more confident with those attainably unattractive and girl-next-door.

Mainly because I feel I don't have anything to lose. I may flip, certainly, when I don't invest emotion. So when it turns out to be a bust, just the idea I get close to such a woman slash girl is broad enough. But the girl was shy to me, you know. I smell their insecurities and somehow it becomes mine.

My fear of losing someone so nice has made me do some stupid things. Call or email frequently some dumber things. How do I stay level-headed enough not to do these things that are borderline stalking? And some mental discipline

I mentioned earlier. Manifesting. In the post above, I mentioned weaknesses I discovered and hoped to find a suggestion or even a small affirmation would suffice, to overcome them. Oh, here are some potential strengths. Strengths. Okay, I've tried the remote seduction CD as well as the inner magnetism section.

I tried a seduction by Victoria Weisel, spinning, on how to attract my soulmate. Unfortunately, with a lot, I tend to assume it's someone I find myself mistaken. With remote seduction and inner magnetism, it seems I either have to make sure the room is uninterruptible, or have to test it on an emotional battlefield. I am pretty sure you're correct

and my higher self is guiding me away from this goal, but my lower self prefers a submission automaton. Oh, I know what he means by lower self. He he automaton. Oh, I know what he means, my lower self. Hee hee hee. Prefers a submissive automaton of this girl over any potential soulmate. You're gross. When I...

Excuse me, sir, I'm rather distinguished, I think. You're gross. You talk to girls. And when I write a list of traits I'd like to have in an ideal partner, they tend to be on the face of one celebrity, the voice of another, the fashion sense of another, etc. E-C-T. Again, this is where that mental discipline I need comes back.

Or the very same girl I had a problem with, but a completely different personality. And I link something... Boring URL. Skip to his next post. Yeah, here's... Okay, that was all build-up. Here's the payoff. Lastly, I have a tickling fetish.

Oh, sure. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. I don't want to cure for this. Nor do I want some secret room To experience this Or rather I don't want to keep this in the dark In fact I'm proud of my little quirk

It's actually a good thing This is why I can tell a girl with a straight face That I don't want to get into her pants Now how do I get that point across? How do I attract women who want to be tickled or are curious about it? Holy shit!

Holy shit! Yes. Wow! Oh, keep going, please. Like I've mentioned before, I'm attracted to women who are assertive, confident, honest, aware of their attractiveness. Not vain, just aware that they

have a power over the opposite sex. But at the same time, dicklish. They could be a punk, an athlete, a martial arts or yoga instructor. Echt. But I'd like to think of them as superheroines

to which my fingers are seductive kryptonite. Come over here, Supergirl. Someone that acts tough but secretly enjoy being tickled. Does anyone have any advice on the training I can do to make all this happen? Oh, Jesus. I would like to thank Boots Reindeer for making my fucking skin crawl. The one image that comes to mind when I'm thinking of meeting my soulmate isn't even a romantic image.

It's that scene in Star Trek First Contact when the Vulcan ship lands on Earth to meet Justin Proctor and after his walk flight. My league just gets all sorts of orgasms over that scene. Okay, and then the response, somebody needs to be Wendy. Keep in mind, Wendy is the person that runs this forum and is trying to sell her product to these people. She is the person in the picture. I'm Wendy.

Okay, now it is all beginning to make sense. Are you a hardcore Trekkie? Not sure how to spell it. If so, this could factor into your inability to find a mate. How do you figure, Wendy? Dream it! No, go to the next page. Dim it!

Alright, so the response that Mindlink has to that. Yes, you spelled it correctly. Not hardcore, at least. I think I'm mostly a TNG slash DSR fan. Yes, you spelled it correctly. Not hardcore, at least. I think I'm mostly a TNG slash DSM fan. I don't have fantasies involving green alien slave girls. I don't think I would have known. Are there any green alien slave girls in those versions of Star Trek?

I have no idea. I'm not so much finding a mate as keeping one. Like the book says, men are from Mars, women are from Venus. Planet! Star Trek. That seems like a Lord of the Rings metaphor between humans and humans, but that would probably alienate me further from the opposite. Oh, yeah.

This shit all the chicks were digging on the Star Trek, but then you brought in some elves. No, no, I can't even do a fucking voice for this, okay? You ready? Alright, yeah. Point is, I thought having a rich fantasy life would make me more susceptible to hypnosis. Well, you're in a dream. I'm gullible

and stupid. Dwarves and halflings, fucking, they'll make me more susceptible to hypnosis. Do you want to pet my hobbit? No, I just- Don't be crazy, but I've heard that the sci-fi crowd slash Star Trek folks, comma, have a little trouble with relationships. Am I wrong? Jesus.

A conversation I had with a friend has given me one more thing I could bounce back to 200%. The thing is, we had good memories together, and I want to claim them. This might sound crude, spoils of war kind of thing, but this is territory she's discarded, and the past is something she didn't want. No use letting it go to waste. Now I can do this hypothetically, meditatively, or just claim it. Okay, I was reading the idiot's guide to dating and I realized this girl was meaning to

possibly... Star Trek fan's guide to dating. Passive, aggressive, before saying quotes. I realized this... It seemed like she was pleased, but wasn't. The actions, the motivations, it all makes sense now.

I'm worried a remote seduction session will, or any attempt to save her from herself, might inadvertently fix the fatal flaws on her current relationship, which I don't want to do. So, wait a minute. She, he said that, no, I'm not trying to get a girl. I'm just trying to keep the girl that I have. By the way, she's dating another guy and isn't really interested in me. Well, you know, whatever. I mean, her and her boyfriend,

they fuck, but they don't tick. Well, to be fair, if he ever saw him hit her, then oh man, he would so punch him out and then he would get the girl at the end. Getting back to the early issue, does having a rich fantasy life hinder my progress? I mean, there's the Star Trek

thing, although I am inclusive of Star Wars as well. I even took an English class in cyberpunk. All right. This is the trio of pussy men. Buddy Brad, you could learn a lot from this guy. I could. Is he teaching?

I hear you play Peter Jackson role-playing games. In addition to that, I've been rere-reading up on classical and ancient Egyptian mythology, as well as Hinduism, and got hooked on this documentary called The Future's Wild. It's a speculative documentary on how nature will continue to evolve in the future. My god, I've fucking seen that. Yeah, that has all the crappy CG, like, oh, in the future, squids might be swinging from the trees. Yeah. has like all the crappy CG like, oh, in the future, squids might be swinging from the trees. Needless to say, it was adorable, but

yeah. The point is, I have an active imagination and was wondering if my ability to create entire cultures in my head could be turned by a hypnosis into something useful in areas like my love life. Then fuck all of you for making me read this creepy-ass shit.

And there we go. Now we understand more about the human mind. John, what do you think of this week? Ah, I learned that, you know, well, I learned that with all the stuff we do on the F+, we kind of do more recent stuff in general. We do, that, you know, well, I learned that with all the stuff we do on the F+, we kind of do more recent stuff in general. We do like, you know, the otherkins and the juggalos

and the weird stuff and the real dolls. Stuff that's a little bit more recent or kind of internet-born. But it's nice to go back to the classics. Old hippie bullshit like psychics and crystals and hypnotism and shit like that. It's just, I don't know, it's like a warm cup of shit coffee. It's just like, ah, it's just getting back to it.

They're a fun and resilient group. I mean, this is people who have been mocked and ridiculed by better humorists than ourselves for the last 40 years, and they're still in there. And they have been proven time and time again by geniuses that what they believe is total garbage,

and they still go for it. Oh, it's great. It's just, it's a classic. You can't beat the classics. Yeah, so hats off to them, and hats off to you for somehow making your way through this. The website is always thefpl.us, where you can

put other things into your human mind that sound like Bunny Bread doing silly voices. Yes, and I command you, command you, to like us on Facebook and submit things to the website and listen to us every week. See you next time. See you, and thanks for listening.

Now sleep! Forgiving you What is this? Are you some kind of a hit? Not dead yet Hey, Honeybird, can you turn down the swearing, please? Oh, I'm sorry. Did I say a J? Yeah, you did. I J swearing, please? Oh, I'm sorry. Did I say a J? I J-bombed, didn't I? Okay.

Jack Bomb. J-bomb's my favorite artist. Jack Bomb. J-bomb is Jack Chick's rapper name, if I remember right. Isn't J-bomb on the Jersey Shore? That's J-wow, actually. I love listening to J-bomb in the squid early in the morning. That's JWoww, actually.

I love listening to J-Bomb in the squidge early in the morning. Hey, hey, a jack-bomb is when you jerk off into a bag and then throw it into the middle of a dance party. I was gonna ask how Stalin's prom experience went. Yeah, I do like the picture of that. Just everybody dancing, and then a bag lands, and everybody looks at it, and then out of nowhere in the background, J-Bomb!